#so im just goin off what i feel lmao idk

[shadebloopnik]

Angelic Alastor AU bc the poly im thinkin out for it makes me laugh sometimes.

Lilith and Lucifer winding down in each others arms after having sex, having random conversation topics and eventually ending on Alastor.

Lilith: He's always been so reserved with anything regarding this, are most of your kind like that or???

Lucifer: No, I mean we are able to have those kinds of relationships, they're not really taboo amongst angels. Alastor's just....never been interested in it...?

Lilith: Hmmm.....

Lucifer: ..........

Lilith: ......he'd be pretty fucking hot tho-

Lucifer: Oh stars yes, I've been envisioning it for eons, you have no idea-

[doomedclockworkdotmp3]

ahaaa. redraw of this oldass drawing

[bangcakes]

.

[juicemitio]

Shaving the rest of my head tomorrow I'll probably be ugly but idrc

[justalittleficsideblog]

Wait.. what did you just say? // Mammon

Writing Prompt:

“You’re so cute.” “Huh?” “I said you look like a boot!”

a/n: I saw this prompt and my brain instantly went towards mammon idk why I feel like this is some type of shit he’d pull fr lmao.

Lounging across the sofa, you flicked through your D.D.D., aimlessly scrolling through devilgram. You eyed the man (devil?) next to you, who was mirroring your actions on the couch across from you.

“Hey, mamooooon..” you dragged, sitting on your hands as you leaned forwards toward him. “Do you wanna go try on some of asmo’s new wardrobe stuff?”

His eyes flicked to yours, pausing his scrolling. “eh?!”

You smiled, eyes brightening as you flopped down next to him on the couch. “or… maybe I can try on some of your model stuff? I feel like dressing up…”

He blushed a bit at your closeness, looking away from you as you wiggled your eyebrows in his direction. He sighed, eyes closing as he imagined you in asmo’s clothes. His heart skipped a beat, imagining you in his attire sent him into a spiral.

“w-woah hold on a sec, why did’ya wanna do that?”

You shrugged, it wasn’t like anyone else in the household had a taste for clothes like he and asmo did. Maybe lucifer you wondered…. A shudder ripped through you as you imagined him catching you guys in his closet. He’d be pissed, for sure.

“for shits and giggles…? C’mon! Im bored, we can do a funny photoshoot,”’ you grabbed his hand and lifted him off of his spot, yanking him up towards his room.

Panting, he put his hands on his knees as he watched you stroll around his room towards his closet. You flung the doors open, swiping this way and that through his clothes.

“I’ve never even seen you wearing this!” you exclaim as you pull out random assortments of clothing. He huffed at your actions, but he peaked at what you were grabbing for yourself. Peering over your shoulder he stiffed when he realized you were grabbing his usual clothes.

“uh, aint that goin’ to be to big for ya?” he attempted to grab it out of your hands. You were too quick, ducking under him as you went to change in his bathroom.

“put on the one’s I picked out for you! We can match.”

He glanced down at what you had grabbed for him to put on, rolling his eyes before he did so. He lifted up the shirt and pants you threw on his bed and noticed…. Wait… huh?

These seemed strangely like the clothes you usually wear…

He chuckled to himself, donning the clothing. Were you trying to dress as opposites?

“I’m ready!” you stepped out the bathroom, sporting his signature boots and jacket. “I present to you.. the Great Mammon!” you twirled around, waiting to see his reaction.

Glancing over, he felt himself stop dead in his tracts. He eyed your form, the way his clothes swamped your smaller frame as you spun around wearing his clothing. He felt oddly territorial over the image, tucking it into his memories.

On the contrary, your eyes Mammon similarly. You kinda liked having your subtle mark on him, that and the guy could look good in just about anything.

Feeling his cheeks heat up, he mumbled. “you’re so cute.”

You turned toward him, “Huh?”

Burning red, he glanced sideways, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt. “I said you look like a boot!”

Head cocked and eyebrow raised, you stared at him, deadpanning, “pardon?”

Fumbling over his words he realized what he said. He didn’t even realize you had sauntered up towards him and planted a kiss on his cheek.

“I think you look cute too, Mammon.”

[yakultii]

guys my plan was to do summer semester but the thing is im yet to finish this semester and by the time i finish these assignments (hopefully end of this week) ill have literally like only 1 week break then do it all again so id do summer semester literally nov-feb then i gotta do next sem march-june and then I’d be done with my degree and be free or i can literally be normal and take the 4-5 months of summer off like everyone else in aus (or even just do 1 class to lighten the rest of the load a little in the other sems) but then id have to do next sem being march-june then july-oct next yr so i wouldn’t be done til this time next yr and i do rlly struggle w this second half of the year as u can all probably tell lmao. and a part of me thinks i should just do summer semester like fulltime load cos ill be on a roll like ill get better marks in the summertime but now a part of me is like what if i burn out (cos i have to do march-june regardless cos there’s a compulsory class on there) but then a part of me is like ill be fine but then a part of me is like maybe I should take a break and dedicate this summer to making friends again and trying to enjoy life and trying to go for walks and stuff but then also i just realised i have to move out of my current place in jan but that’s ok i could just go travel for a bit or somethin til i figure out where im moving idk idk wot do u think i need opinions even tho i ultimately don’t listen to anyone ever (just kidding i will actually consider listening to u bc idk) i rlly do wanna just be done w this degree but at the same time i feel like the timing is kinda right to make new friends and old friend and stuff like some things have come where im like maybe this is a sign from the universe to take the opportunity idk like i could have the best summer of my life is i let myself but then there’s also the chance it goes so wrong which is another reason i was gonna do summer sem cos a part of my brain so wanna relapse n like if i do summer sem my academic validation stronger than anything (except rn apparently no jk it still goin strong ish hence im not sleeping rn) and like if i do summer sem i know I won’t relapse bc i rlly need brain capacity to be able to perform at the level i want to (despite doing everything the night before believe it or not ur brain needs minimal fuel at least) so it’s like as much as doing summer sem SUCKS it would probs be good for me rn (though I could probably just try really hard to have a fun summer and engage w humans for the first time in years and distract myself and be glad I had a good summer and not relapse yeh) and I’ve been hyping myself up for it the entire year and I do think that id be ok and not burn out bc I’d be starting fresh and also im just gonna do it online anyway and try keep up and maybe I can hang out w friends at the same time but also I could not do it and dedicate myself to trying to get something good going for me in this life outside of uni you know but then it would extend my degree for another 12 months hmmmm what do u think

[hyukalyptus]

nsfw alphabet - me!

i wanna do something super casual, so here's an nsfw alphabet for ME! this is definitely me oversharing about my sex life but whatever i wanna do it.

CW!! WAAAAY TMI about my sex life and preferences. if that makes you uncomfy, skip!! i won't be offended, i totally get it! i'm just doing this so we can giggle together about sex.

a = aftercare (what they’re like after sex) - i need to be cuddled immediately. mostly prefer being spooned and they rub my ass while we take a quick lil cat nap. also love it when they clean me up for me lol.

b = body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) - on myself, my ass. on others, chests (regardless of gender) or balls on amab obvi. also love moles!! and hair.

c = cum (anything to do with cum) - i feel like im gonna get some gasps for this, but i just don't love cum. IM SRY!! its totally a me thing, a texture mostly. i looOOOoOoOoOOOoove when men cum on my ass/back. like one of my favorite things. like i don't even have to cum myself if they do that (which has happened, i srsly don't mind!), just rly relaxing to me.

d = dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) - hm...iono...ig i keep my writing secret from most people?

e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?) - eh. im relatively experienced ig lol. way more experienced w amab than afab. i know what i'm doing for the most part haha. sometimes i rly wanna move my body in a specific way and i can't and that's frustrating, but other than that, i guess im ok?

f = favorite position - missionary! :D

g = goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.) - i love having fun sex! i'd say i take the intimacy pretty seriously, but i like having fun with trying different positions and finding out what doesn't work and what does.

h = hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.) - i shave once every few weeks and then let it grow and shave again when its irritating me. never bald.

i = intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect) - like i said, i can definitely be super intimate, but i won't lie i'm mega impatient and that just makes me a tad desperate.

j = jack off (masturbation headcanon) - i like audio porn best

k = kink (one or more of their kinks) - wax play, roleplaying, butt stuff.

l = location (favorite places to do the do) - the bed by far. couch when im feeling a lil saucy LMAO.

m = motivation (what turns them on, gets them going) - when im high. or strangely, i get GOIN at museums. idk what tf it is about them. if someone takes me on a museum date, they are gettin some later for SURE. i'm clingy at the museum, holding their hand and touching them, kissing them and i literally need them immediately. idk what it is! and any museum. art, science, history, space, i don't care, they can get it as soon as i step foot in one.

n = no (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) - i don't like being restrained. i love the idea of it, but i can't do it.

o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.) - definitely prefer receiving. i have so many texture issues with my mouth that it can be difficult for me ngl. like i can barely eat foot a lot of days. i am rly good at it tho ill give myself that!

p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.) - i like starting sensual then working up to a pretty fast pace. im an impatient greedy bottom like i said hmph

q = quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.) - not my thing. can never rly get off.

r = risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.) - ugh i love experimenting with the right person. i have to feel 100% safe with them to do so, but i love it.

s = stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?) - okok i'm a lil embarrassed to admit this but i cum pretty fast. i don't last very long :( i just LIVE for it in the moment ykwim? like i just neeeed it or i'll die iono. im a loser ig. but i usually only go for 1 round. i love the idea of going for multiple, but i'm pretty much ready to snuggle after 1 round.

t = toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?) - i LOVE toys. i use at least one every time i have sex. i love using them on myself, love using them on others. they just make sex better so why not! i kinda don't get the taboo-ness of them? like to me, they're as much a part of sex as condoms ykwim? its just...what i do idk. i particularly love clit toys. this is my current fave. this one is nice but its kinda intense. this one is great for ~beginners~ and its super quiet, a little more on the gentler side.

u = unfair (how much they like to tease) - i like teasing! i find that a lot of guys like edging a lot, so i love playing into that.

v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.) - im too loud. i'm quite the moaner and i love saying their name.

w = wild card (a random headcanon) - i've only ever experienced being "cock drunk" twice and both times were MAGICAL. like omfg. one of them, i was high so idk if that counts? but it was amazing. the other time i was fully sober, idk what was going on, guess it was his dick. but since then, i'm completely obsessed with the idea of being cock drunk.

x = x-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes) - ooh what would i say! i got nice tits. and a big booty.

y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?) - i've got a pretty low sex drive if you believe it or not!

z = zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) - i could fall asleep immediately frfr.

[wishmemel]

OMGOMG SAFI congrats on 100 ml !! hihii im here to participate in your cute slumber party event ! (i even brought my fave pillow and totoro plushie)

okok soo yk i'm dria 🩵 black / caribbean, around 5'1 (i promise im so close to 5'2 don't @ me haters will hate i drink my milk and eat my veggies) i have huge hair!! like very big hair, too many curls!! it's alot! i love reading, i write plenty of poetry, which is what i use most of my time to do — i lovelove r&b and early 2000s rap music. however, if u open my spotify rn and shuffle my liked songs it would go in order of hip hop, rap, afrobeats, classical music bcus my taste is all over the place. (i also keep a folder of edit audios for my own maladaptive daydreaming purposes lmao)

im rlly a baby blue girlie, fave flowers are tulips (idk my brain js thinks they look yummy), fave season is autumn ofc bcus rainy weather and i have an excuse to stay inside under my blankets 😭 fave animal would beee a black panther or a tabby cat! (my bby bella is a tabby lmao) i love vintage shows (rlly old noir films of all types of genres) i love cinema and visual art it stimulates me sm (im autistic btw i forgot to say mb) i've watched almost every wes anderson film in existence i love soft color palettes in film so bad <3

i enjoy watching old cartoons to relive my childhood nostalgia, jewelry (esp rings i never go anywhere without one or two on), rainy days, late night car drives, baggy shirts, scented candles, afrobeats n anything astronomy related.

im very much a social science n humanities junkie - yearning to be a clinical psychiatrist or complete my dream of teaching literature / psychology. i cry very easily (im js a crybaby istg) - in general im just very very emotional and more often than not i forget common sense and instinct are a thing bcus wtv i feel i just go with it - though i am extremely introverted and freak out when overstimulated in huge crowds and whatnot.

for the event im picking toji bcus that man is the love of my life bye ☹️ the epitome of sunshine and sunshine protector - tiny human and big scary guard dog ! in terms of our compatibility, we're so opposite it's insane! but we balance each other out well. sometimes i have to serve as toji's brain bcus this man is spending money he does not have on all sorts of things for me js cause i looked twice (my sister hced that he'd go below bankrupt buying me sanrio plushies and rings) he works mostly off instinct where i go completely off emotion so we butt heads alot in terms of decision making but he does not know how to tell me no, all i do is sigh once and HES DONE FOR.

i stress this man out like hes my full time babysitter pls

we acc spend alot of time having deep talks about the world and life in general, (i told him ab the backrooms lore and it messed w his head for weeks) which is a side of him he rarely shows to anyone (also he listens to me rant abt daily pop culture developments bcus he lowkey loves the celebrity drama) he's rlly protective, and even moreso bcus of how my anxiety gets. in a crowd this man is standing in front of me and blocking my view of everyone (he also subconsciously pulls me into his side when we're walking in public bcus my autistic ass will see one thing and wander off never to be found again) im always talking like talk talk talking and he pretends he isn't listening but he's literally able to repeat today something i mentioned two weeks ago - he's attentive, shows his love through actions rather than words. if i even make a face that gives away that im uncomfortable being somewhere, or my social battery is dead, hes taking me home no questions asked not a care as to who says what.

im an affection junkie - physical touch is my thing ! and hes so big! so im always pouncing on him for bear hugs and he acts so unimpressed and cocky abt it like "oh you missed me? im not goin anywhere relax" but he acc melts bcus when was the last time someone gave him affection?? he prob thinks im a figment of his imagination lolol

days off / dates would mainly be : window shopping, grocery runs, sitting in the park at sunset, indoor ramen dates n movie marathons and cuddles !!

AHHH sorry if i ranted way too much omg i can't wait to see what you do safi, i'll love anything u write ily so baddd <33

note: hihi dria, thanks for bringing your fave pillow and your totoro plush to the slumber party.

dria x toji — ꒰ tojria

“in this space right here that we have made for each other, you can say anything and i will not abandon you. unwrap the worst things you have done. watch me hold them up to the light and not even flinch.”

height differences, cinnamoroll x badtz maru, protective touches, 3 am conversations about life, romantic picnics at sunset, shopping together, opposites attract, shy x protective, princess treatment, introvert x introvert, buckling your seatbelt for you, tired bf x hyper gf, teasing remarks, day x night, accidental eye contact, blushing, midnight walks, late night phone calls, giddiness, sunshine x sunshine protector, stealing his clothes, late night drives, deleted texts, holding hands under the table, "mean to everyone but her" bf, head pats, she fell first, he fell harder.

being with toji is not always as seamless or easy as you make it look. He's gruff and protective and difficult and incredibly stubborn. like that time you two fought because he was ignoring what you were saying and he flat-out refused to acknowledge your demand when you called him out on it. to be fair, he'd come home after an eight-hour shift and you'd started talking his head off, but it wouldn't kill him to listen. he wasn't paying attention when you were talking about that new hello kitty cafe with the fun milkshakes and the mini donuts that you wanted to try. hell, he ended up falling asleep on your shoulder after brushing off your argument and as much as you wanted to remain angry at him, you'd softened immediately upon seeing his tired face, all eyebags and troubled frown. and he did make it up to you later by taking you to said cafe and proving that he had been listening, though when you brought it up to him, he pretended not to know what you were talking about. but deep down he cares for you and he's trying — you know he's trying and you don't want to make him feel bad for things he can't control. a lot of the concerns you should bring up to him, you don't — you want this relationship to be easy and safe. you want him to feel comfortable with you the same way that you feel comfortable with him. even if sometimes he comes home with a busted lip and bloody knuckles and sends your heart skidding against your ribcage. but what matters is that he comes to you first and he comes home to you. so you know that no matter what, no matter how he's feeling, if he thinks he can talk to you or not, he'll always come home to you. and even if you doubt his commitment sometimes, he knows that you're home to him and he'll do anything to keep it that way.

NOW PLAYING

the way i loved you, enchanted, daylight, afterglow, how you get the girl, treacherous, sparks fly, so it goes...

join safi's perfect slumber party event — requests are open for everyone!

[skeletood]

OHHHHH SO MANY THOUGHTS TO SHARE

Holy shit. Probably the hardest I’ve laughed at any of the new seasons releases so far. Absolutely speechless

Hellhole:

- SOOOOO HAPPY to see them riff again it’s so corny and silly

- Beavis gets to hell and his first thought is where all the biker dudes are? interesting interesting *puts this in my notes

-oh my god already some amazing facial expressions

no wonder this dude ends up with so many cracked teeth in the future

- the boys being inexplicably immune to death never gets old to me

- THE DARKNESS PART HAD MY HEAD IN MY HANDS SHUT UP. THANK **GOD** IT WASN’T ANOTHER ESCAPED SNAKE SITUATION DEAR GOD IVE NEVER BEEN HAPPIER FOR A BAIT AND SWITCH

-hehe :] sillies

Overall thoughts: Another great ep this season good job guys, gave me a lot of good little laughs

The video segment was whatever but Arianna’s eye candy so like. All good :]

Take A Bow:

My god. I had absolutely no idea what was going to happen on the way in to this episode and I was NOT prepared for what it gave me and put me through

- already starting the ep strong with some GREAT facial expressions

so fucking real i used to do this to my guy friends when i was their age. not quite enough to put them in the hospital but like. yea lmao

- (monotone) “Take a bow” HAD ME DYINNNNGGGGG

- knowing about all the flavors of mountain dew what a goddamn nerd (knows everything about the different monster flavors)

- “Cherries don’t taste red at ALL. They taste all barfy” little kids complaining about foods they dont like is so silly, thank you for being your childish self its so refreshing

oh man. fuck. its butthead characterization time! finally some good fucking food. oh man here come the waterworks IMAGINE me getting stupid over an emotionally stunted idiot with a big head:

- “not until youre better beavis” first of all shut up. second of all shut up.

- “It’s like, I didn’t mean to hurt him. Feeling bad sucks.” WE KNOW BABY. WE KNOW. SO PROUD OF YOU FOR ADMITTING IT HUN :((((( the fact that bro cant even acknowledge he HAS feelings unless he’s alone. the volumes that speaks to me. man

if you had told me a week ago these were real screenoshots i wouldnt have believed you. at all. cant wait to see the looks on the faces of all the “ohh stop looking so far into it its just a stupid lowbrow cartoon” people like shut the fuck up!!!!! youve clearly never experienced real friendship before and are so pissed off cause u dont know what it looks like

- not pictured here is where they had to forcefully remove butthead from the room bc he was freaking out after thinking he killed beavis. If you disagree youre just wrong sorry!

- not only is this a funny as hell angle but man. we already know damn well he doesn’t want beavis to die but its nice to hear him say it. also he’s right, it was really funny. take a bow :]

- a lot of really good beavis screams this episode too

- BOY. HOW DO YOU KNOW WHAT “COVID” IS. MR JUDGE IM STRIKING THAT FROM THE RECORDS BUT YOURE ON THIN FUCKING ICE AKJSDSNA

- “-and his friend would have died of grief shortly there-after” I’m- I need a minute. LIKE WE ALREADY KNEW THIS BUT. THANKS FOR ADMITTING IT. 

- also, god is a whiteman i guess kasjndsajkd

In conclusion: both fucking great episodes. I am always EXTRA excited for Butt-Head characterization moments, it just makes him so much more human. Not to mention how happy I am to see that they toned down his cruelty JUST a touch. I honestly didn’t notice how bad it had gotten last season until i compared it to how this one is going so far, it feels more like older seasons butthead again :] Like dont get me wrong i LOVE it when he’s mean its just who he is but it should come more out of a place of stupidity/no real self awareness than like. idk wherever it was coming from last season. These boys are goin soft on us and to that i say: thank god. It’s nice to see them act human. Take a bow has EASILY taken old man beavis’ place as my favorite ep so far and ngl its going to be tough to beat. Funny episode that had me chuckling throughout the whole thing AND nice Butt-Head moments? Oh Mike, you shouldnt have u///u

Anyways lemme know your thoughts :]

[tojikai]

everyone is involved in the discourse and i wanna be too lmao. on one hand, i’m rooting for satoru and oc. i really think their relationship was salvageable but when i think about it, this was two people who weren’t super in love from the beginning of their situation but tried to make things work. going from strangers to parents with barely any room to truly get to know each other…the relationship was doomed to be strained. satoru and naomi…she got the version of him i believe oc would have gotten had they had more time to flush out a genuine long-standing relationship before becoming parents. raising a baby while simultaneously trying to continuously assert your own identity within being a new parent is already complicated and leaves a lot of room for poor communication as individuals but factoring in a romantic relationship in there…it at times feels like they weren’t ready for each other. and they weren’t going to be ready until they found ways to be okay with this new self they had to become. a part of me feels like a lot of satoru’s attitude is just resentment. like they both love their child but i don’t know if either of them enjoyed parenthood. and that’s a weird hard thing to have to talk about. and it seems really easy to have either overflowing resentment or a complete withdrawal of yourself. ah, anyway i love the story. i don’t have kids but their dynamic has pushed me into really thinking about these types of nuanced, complicated relationships. like naomi! i personally love[d] her. she’s lost her way now, but i don’t believe it was ever her intent to try and replace oc. also! idk if it was your intention to make naomi out to be a almost villian specifically through oc’s perspective in the beginning but it’s very interesting watching her behavior as told through oc’s perception, feeling like great i’m gonna hate this girl and then her behavior as told through satoru’s which made me like her. the stuff with his mom tho. whew lmao. she really had me in the first half then ran straight off the field all together. like girl! what is you doin! where is you goin! this is assault!

hiiii, i enjoyed reading this, especially the part abt how naomi was written. yn doesn't see her as a 'villain', but she doesn't feel comfortable around her bc of how she is w her ex and her child. yn got insecurities which she thought naomi could easily feel and that's why it's painful for her to be around naomi. as for satoru,(before the SA thing), she's like a safe haven bc of how she was there when he was tired of everything going on between yn and him 🥹 i really like how u explained yn and satoru's rs. it's like they started in the middle part and all of it was overwhelming for them, making everything spin out of control so easily. like they didn't get a proper warm-up 😭 anyways thank u so much for this, it took a long time im sorry, but i truly appreciate it <33 have a nice day/night ~

[searchforthescars]

YOOOO DID YOU SEE THE SAB S2 TRAILER?!?!? IM GONNA FUCKING LOSE IT DUDE

Bestie bestie I need you to know that I got this ask and that was how I learned the TRAILER WAS OUT - I was at a convention all weekend so I was very much off the internet fgdfkgjh - and so I wanted to wait and answer this til I could actually watch it but YEAH MY SISTER AND I JUST WATCHED IT AND I'M GOIN NUTS

Putting my thoughts under the cut for spoiler purposes

Between Mal being In Situations every hour of every day, Jesper being a fucking ICON with that jacket spin/sweep-shooting combo, and Kaz being.......Kaz...........I'm so ready to just have a good time, my guy (gender neutral). I've been feeling a very normal way about these characters since I was about 17, and it's been a lot of fun to watch them come to life on my screen. I have a new appreciation for the story now, at 24, than I did at 17-19, and that's made the experience even richer.

I know there are some folks who don't like the show and what aging up the characters did to them - which, fair, far be it from me to say their feelings are wrong, that's not my place or my way - but I really enjoy the differences in their characterizations. To me, SAB feels like...an alternate edition of canon, if that makes sense? Not quite an AU, per se, but an imagining of what could've been if the characters had been a bit older, maybe wiser, and had a different set of lived experiences.

Again, however you feel about the show vs the books is FINE. I am not here to ruin anyone's good time. There are things about the books that I adore, just as there are things about the show I adore. There's a Grishaverse character that I hated in the books but that I love in the show. There are decisions the show made that the books didn't, and both stories are still equally great.

Idk man I can't wait for another season of everyone being sexy and criminal. I'm bisexual, so I literally cannot lose lmao

[annikuh]

I’m in therapy goin off abt myself & my therapist asks “what do you need to help you?” & im like “idk, i barely understand it, but ive been exploring it thru Panathir.” then i start talking a bit abt him and his core issues and a whole ass spiel. & then she goes “what does Panathir need to help him?” & I launch into it abt how he needs Jax to help him and just going on and on

& then im like “…oh ok I get it now, yeah I’ll try that” LMAO

but it felt like getting shot in the chest, like…yeah it’s an obvious comparison, but it was kind of a big moment bc I like…idk I felt love for myself & some hope. like I know it consciously, but babey that’s me! both of these guys that I love so much are me! I have sympathy for them and I actually have sympathy for me!

I’ve been using Jax to help me understand myself better and get some catharsis and hopefully like myself more for a long time, and I used Syvis as a big help in their progress. and it’s wonderful but it’s hard bc she’s not me, which makes it harder for me to apply it irl. but Panathir is me and notably the part of me that needs the most intensive work atm, so today I was like…oh i feel it. I can actually do something productive with this now in my own development.

I love my little nepherits so much, and it’s heartwarming that, like, they’re working how I need them to.

idk if this makes any sense bc it’s rambly but it was just a nice moment & it makes me wanna cry.

[pesterloglog]

Roxy Lalonde, John Egbert, Harry Anderson Egbert

Candy, page 38

ROXY: sup john

ROXY: long time no see

ROXY: well alright then pal

ROXY: i do believe u know the way to the living room

JOHN: yeah, yep.

JOHN: thanks.

JOHN: sorry for staring like an idiot.

JOHN: it’s...

JOHN: i just got done with a whole week of feeling weird about hanging out in my dad’s old house again.

JOHN: I kind of forgot to think about how it would be surreal coming back here, too.

JOHN: some kind of nostalgia whiplash, i guess.

ROXY: fair enough yo

ROXY: harry andersons out if u were wonderin

ROXY: hell scoot back home later so if you make it thru round 1 of awkward ex-family convos im happy to say you can be rewarded with another

JOHN: oh, cool.

JOHN: i’d like to see him, if…

JOHN: if it’s okay with both of you.

ROXY: ya we chatted bout it

ROXY: but like i said

ROXY: one thing at a time

ROXY: lets me n u tear this ol egbert/lalonde estrangement band-aid right the fuck off n see what we got goin on underneath it

JOHN: sounds like a plan.

JOHN: so, uh.

JOHN: i’ve been doing a lot of thinking recently.

JOHN: and i’ve realized some things.

JOHN: some stuff that involves you and some that doesn’t, but all things i think you deserve to know.

JOHN: whew.

JOHN: ok lemme think where to start...

JOHN: you know how jake left jane?

JOHN: i mean, i assume you know.

JOHN: though, uh, no offense, but jane’s version might be...

JOHN: skewed.

ROXY: oh lmao nah i didnt hear it from janey

ROXY: harry anderson filled me in on wat he got thru the teen grapevine

JOHN: oh!

JOHN: are you guys not...

JOHN: nevermind.

JOHN: i’m sorry, i came to apologize for my shit, not pry into your business.

JOHN: we don’t have to talk about jane if you don’t want to.

ROXY: janey n me havent been super tight of late

JOHN: ah.

JOHN: what about politics not coming between friends and all that?

ROXY: lmao well turns out sometimes someones politics make it p clear what kind of friends they value

ROXY: or dont

ROXY: and idk sometimes people you used to like when you were a teen grow up to be assholes or w/e!!

ROXY: i think i was clingin to somethin just to prove to myself that i was doin stuff right

ROXY: ol rolal

ROXY: hella normal

ROXY: v good at sticking with friends

ROXY: the more i thought abt it the more i figured holdin on to that one thing made me lose out on some other shit

ROXY: u might relate

JOHN: haha, you got me there i guess.

ROXY: anyways

ROXY: im not tryna take up all ur big speech time w/ my stuff

ROXY: you were tellin me about how jake n janey finally went splitsways and how it gave you some kind of epiphany

JOHN: no, it’s cool!

JOHN: i’m glad to hear it.

JOHN: we can come back to your shit after my shit, maybe.

JOHN: but yeah, jake, he uh...

JOHN: he and tavros are living with me now.

JOHN: i think for the foreseeable future. we were expecting jane to have kind of a fit about it, but all we’ve gotten so far are some divorce papers.

JOHN: if she knows where jake is and she hasn’t had a drone fleet dispatched to nuke my house off the planet i think that’s a good sign she’s actually just letting them go?

JOHN: which is kind of surprising, but, uh. good, i guess.

ROXY: ok ill b the first 2 admit that janes turned into kind of a jerk lately but u no shes not actually like

ROXY: literally evil

ROXY: lol

JOHN: that’s debatable!

ROXY: sry to disappoint but janes just a person and you cant actually blame her for everything that went wrong in our marriage like i was her helpless thrall or somethin

JOHN: that’s not what i was saying...

ROXY: ok neither of us came here to argue about janey did we

JOHN: you’re right. let’s just not talk about her.

ROXY: yea

JOHN: anyway...

JOHN: i’ve been doing a lot of thinking about how things got to be like they are.

JOHN: i guess i’ll just come out and say it.

JOHN: i completed fucked up your entire life.

JOHN: i’m not going to pretend like there are two sides here. it’s my bad, totally.

JOHN: like, not just what happened to our marriage, though it’s also true that that’s completely my fault.

JOHN: but even before that...

JOHN: i think i fucked up on just this massive, fundamental level, and it’s what i did—

JOHN: or, well, what i didn’t do—

JOHN: that caused every stupid bullshit thing about the way this world is.

JOHN: none of this was supposed to be this way.

JOHN: honestly, it doesn’t feel right that we got married at all, does it?

JOHN: your life was heading in this whole other direction with callie, and i just...

JOHN: i dunno. i just kind of took that from you.

JOHN: i think i ended up taking a lot of decisions from a lot of people.

JOHN: everything took a backseat to what i wanted.

JOHN: whatever cosmic significance the lives here do or don’t have, all the pointless suffering i’ve created is... inhumane. and—

ROXY: oh nah ill stop u rite there my man

ROXY: im sorry john ilu but this is some hot steamin horseshit

JOHN: what?!

ROXY: its some real jerkoff emoji stuff is all im sayin!!

ROXY: you think you choice mattered so much that no one elses could measure up?

ROXY: n then what

ROXY: did u get what u wanted?

ROXY: did your life end and the points got tallied and you came out on top or like what?

ROXY: still p much seems like were movin to me

ROXY: and you sure dont seem like ur winnin so wheres all this good shit you got that you gotta go around handin out apologies for?

ROXY: also damn dude while were at it!!

ROXY: u forgot to actually say sorry in that apology!

JOHN: no, i didn’t — i just meant...

JOHN: i’m sorry for fucking up your life, or making it not—

ROXY: i like my life!!!

ROXY: i mean it aint perf and i got my share of fuckups n mistakes in there but you dont get to tell me its fucked up

ROXY: or that it isnt real or somethin

ROXY: its mine!

ROXY: i mean i felt... somethin i guess

ROXY: but its not just you

ROXY: youve never been the only player in this game u kno

ROXY: do u not remember who all was there when this all kicked off?

ROXY: me n callie wouldna told u u had a choice if it was all just some meaningless bs

ROXY: its not like i was ever some master seer of all that ever was or will be but i do know a lil bit abt what coulda gone down if things were different

ROXY: and u know what

ROXY: i like the way things turned out just fuckin fine

ROXY: so maybe u could stop wastin precious eternity thinkin ur so special that its ur fault everyones not perfectly happy

JOHN: i just kept wanting to find ways to make everything make sense, you know?

JOHN: but maybe it just fucking doesn’t.

ROXY: i know we became grownups in a world built specifically n cosmically for us

ROXY: so i get wanting to find a pattern in everything

ROXY: but not everything has 2 b that deep

ROXY: n when u think abt it

ROXY: lookin at it that way, like evrythin has to be this elaborately purposeful heroic design to be worthwhile

ROXY: is actually p shallow

JOHN: oh.

JOHN: yeah, i guess.

JOHN: i’m sorry. it’s just so hard to not feel like a total asshole.

JOHN: maybe i’m not some grand vizier of destroying time and space or whatever.

JOHN: but we KNOW that there’s a canon timeline out there.

JOHN: and it seems really obvious to me that we aren’t in it anymore.

ROXY: so what

JOHN: “so what”???

ROXY: yea

ROXY: so what

ROXY: tf do i care that theres some other reality out there some1 arbitrarily decided was the “real” one

ROXY: whats that have to do with the life i have now

ROXY: what is there actually that makes this one mean less than that one to the ppl who r actually in it

JOHN: you never feel like it would’ve been better if things had gone a different way?

JOHN: magic or no, i could have done a lot differently, for you especially.

JOHN: stuck around, or... fuck.

JOHN: stayed out of your way to begin with.

JOHN: let you and callie do your thing, or do whatever it was you seemed to be headed off to do.

JOHN: i just didn’t expect it to be me, after...

ROXY: nah dont say that

ROXY: i mean i accept ur apology this time but

ROXY: theres obvs all kinds of ways shit coulda gone

ROXY: and tbh back then

ROXY: with her...

ROXY: mostly i think i just wanted to do stuff right

ROXY: not that i knew wtf that even meant lmao

ROXY: which was prob the problem lmao lmao lmao

ROXY: just like

ROXY: we had this big fresh as hell start at bein people!

ROXY: i had all these conflictin thoughts abt how to be me in the first place

ROXY: like what it meant to date a beautiful skull alien

ROXY: sexualitywise and genderwise and person in generalwise

ROXY: for a while there i didnt know if i wanted ppl to think of me as a woman at all

JOHN: ah, i didn’t know.

JOHN: well, i guess maybe i wondered?

JOHN: but the way young idiot me would have wondered, so not that deeply.

JOHN: and it seemed like you’d forgotten all about it when we got together.

ROXY: i hadnt forgotten about it

JOHN: do you want to talk about it...?

ROXY: i coulda told you then but i kinda felt embarrassed abt flip floppin with my identity i think

ROXY: mean it isnt like i grew up with big airquotes society tellin me what was right n wrong like u did

ROXY: so it wasnt any kind of shamefest

ROXY: just a lot of abstract hypotheticals wed only just started talking about and never got very far into

ROXY: just idk i thought i might do things one way but then i stopped hangin out with callie as much

ROXY: its not like i stopped thinkin abt it

ROXY: or her

ROXY: but it never rly came up with anyone else and i didnt rly feel like i could talk abt it with you so i never brought it up again

JOHN: i’m really sorry you felt that way, roxy.

ROXY: its ok its not ur fault

JOHN: but you don’t regret it?

JOHN: not going for that stuff, and instead just... marrying me?

JOHN: i’m not asking so you can absolve me, i’m just impressed.

JOHN: how do you not second guess every choice you make?

ROXY: i havent stuck my head in the timeline vortex like u have so i dunno what its like to see other options

ROXY: i just do things the best way i think to do em and then shrug n hope it works out?

ROXY: i dont think i can regret anything

ROXY: theres not only one right way to be me imo

ROXY: i like the me i am

ROXY: its not like i went n decided “actually hell ya love to be a woman n do all the shit on the woman checklist”

ROXY: i get that thats prob what it looks like outside of my own self but i dont care abt that

ROXY: sorry lol im not good at this whole explainin what transpires in my brain thing

ROXY: idk this life ive been livin gave me harry anderson

ROXY: that kinda outweighs anything else just for me personally

ROXY: n its not like i ever totally quit thinkin abt that gender stuff

ROXY: i just found a different way to work it out than maybe i was originally gonna

ROXY: i...

ROXY: but lmao john were just adults

ROXY: were not dead!

ROXY: idk i mean were only what... barely middle aged in regular human years?

ROXY: we got all kinds of hypothetical but still prolly finite eternity to work our shit out

ROXY: who tf knows

ROXY: its not like you figure out who you are when youre 23 and then the rest of ur whole life is just sittin back watchin ur shit fall apart or not

ROXY: i mean maybe thats been it for u so far

JOHN: haha. ouch.

ROXY: i just dont think im anywhere near done buildin those roxy self actualization train stops

ROXY: who the fuck can say how many more i got lined up

ROXY: same goes for u

ROXY: if youre willing to look at this life as more than a cosmically pointless dead end failure that is

JOHN: i guess...

JOHN: there’s literally nothing to do but keep moving forward.

JOHN: i may as well not be a big fucking downer about it if i don’t have to be.

ROXY: thats the spirit

ROXY: weve got a million billion lifetimes ahead of us john

ROXY: u dont even KNOW all the ways u got left to fuck up in!!

ROXY: hows that for some inspiration??!

JOHN: it’s...

JOHN: it’s pretty fucking inspirational, roxy.

JOHN: thank you for trusting me with this personal stuff.

JOHN: i know partly you were telling me all that to kick my sadsack ass, but i know you don’t talk about this kind of thing every day.

ROXY: to be real i hadnt even let myself think abt it every day

ROXY: so thanks for lettin me ramble at u out loud instead of just almost thinkin abt it once every few years

JOHN: i guess sometimes it takes hearing the same shit over and over until it sticks.

JOHN: that’s mostly an own on myself by the way.

ROXY: lmao were just rippin off those bandaids left n right over here

ROXY: a coupla professional issue discussers

JOHN: yeah, i’m frankly baffled by how fucking good we are at this?

JOHN: where was this when we sucked so hard at being married?

ROXY: buried under a shocking number of issues is my guess

JOHN: well, it’s nice to throw a few off, for once.

ROXY: feel free to communicate with me instead of spendin the next 300 years in a silent prison of your own making if u so desire

JOHN: hey harry anderson.

JOHN: it’s really, really good to see you.

JOHN: do you wanna go for a drive?

HARRY ANDERSON: yeah, dad.

HARRY ANDERSON: that could be cool.

[sukunasweetheart]

supposed to be doing an online test or smth rn but fuck that shit im thinkin abt squid game au for jjk instead hahaha warning; minor squid game spoilers and a bit of extra spice too

sukuna’s voice actor (suwabe junichi) did the japanese dubbing for gong yoo in the show and i screamed bc 😩 they did him so well by making this choice

anyway thats one possibility - sukuna as the sexy man with the suit and the suitcase goin around and slapping people (can i get slapped? sir?)

BUT my thoughts also went to the FRONTMAN in the show omggg bro that scene during red light green light where he started playing ‘fly me to the moon’ and sat on his sofa in front of the giant screen??? and then proceeded to pour himself that glass of whiskey or some shit whilst he leaned back and enjoyed watching all those people suffer- idk abt u but that screams sukuna vibes to me oop. AND it was sexy as hell ngl

another alternative; the VIPs in squid game were all so immature and crusty 🤢 but we all know sukuna as a VIP would be sexy as hell. him with a golden tiger mask!!! filthy rich too lmao (ik im completely going off of what morals/ideas the show is supposed to represent but sdGKSDN FUCK)

POV youre working as one of the staff during squid game - VIP!sukuna eventually gets bored of whatevers playing out in front of him and instead, takes an interest in u + just to clarify, he is not wearing a robe 👎 he be wearing a snazzy suit 

maybe you got nervous while serving the drinks or whatever and he thought u were cute when u fumbled around LMAO idk

anyway yea he takes u to the back and ur all 👉 👈 this man POWERFUL, makin u feel 😳 even without showin u his face,, his voice sexy,,

someee nasty up ahead 🤪 contains; slight(?)dubcon, rough throat fucking, dacryphilia, sukuna calls you pet, gender neutral reader

“Come on, pet. You know that mask will only get in the way.”

Your hands have a slight tremble to them as you remove it, revealing your face to the man who had brought you here on one of his own whims. You witness his mouth curve up into a smirk upon seeing you.

He maintains that languid smile of his as you work your way around the tip of his length, tongue darting over it with hesitation. The man’s hand comes down to the back of your head and pushes your face forward.

“Beautiful.You know what you need to do, don’t you?”

Nodding fervently, you unbuckle his belt to reveal his erection that was strained tightly against his boxers. The swell of his cock, encouraged by the sight of you.

“That’s cute, but you can do better than that.”

When you slide his cock down your throat the best you can, he lets out a guttural moan that makes you ache with lust. He takes over for a moment, driving it in and out of you at an excruciatingly slow pace, making your eyes water as you try to hold back your gags. The man passes the control back over to you soon however, and you pull back to take a breath before working to bob your head over his cock again.

He admires your obedience. He thinks there’s something about you that strangely entices him, and decides to take a bit of a gamble.

“If you can swallow it all, I’ll even take my mask off for you,” he tells you with a salacious tone of voice. It stirs something up within you, your lips pursing around his girth, and suddenly, you feel determined to see the face behind that golden disguise. Your grip on the fabric of his pants get tighter.

“I’ll take that as a yes to my suggestion.”

Without warning, his hands come up to both sides of your head and brings you all the way down, your nose hitting his lower abdomen. You’re unable to hold back your gagging now, and your palms hit his hips with panic. 

“Relax, pet. I’m nearly there-” he grunts, thrusting harder, hitting the back of your throat relentlessly. Despite the abrupt roughness, your own excitement was growing, more than you’d like to admit. The man curses under his breath and continues to fuck your mouth, the lewd sound of your slobbering echoing around the room.

Thick rope after rope rolls down your throat as a string of groans leave his lips, the feeling of you swallowing around him sending a shudder of pleasure down his spine. You can feel him twitching on your tongue.

“Are you ready for it?” he asks you.

But it seems that it was intended to be a rhetorical question, judging from the way he didn’t wait for an answer, instead shoving his cock all the way down and spilling his seed inside.

Tears are now spilling down your cheeks with your every blink as he slowly pulls out of your mouth with a grin.

“Good pet. You did well.” He praises. “Now for your reward,” he says to you, wiping your tears away with his thumb, making sure that you were seeing him properly. That teasing smirk remains on his face when he lifts his mask, a gleam going over its surface as he takes it off entirely. 

You’re left staring once you catch sight of his face properly - deep, crimson eyes and strange tattoos that suit him so well. A dangerous kind of charming.

“Your actions say everything and more,” he chuckles, tilting your head up by your chin. You hitch in a breath when his face gets closer to yours. His eyes wander about your appearance, deep in observation.

“Yeah. I’m definitely keeping you around.”

Masterlist

[sonianvmd]

thh characters with a crush on you

warnings: none, maybe some swearing but otherwise nothing major

oH and mentions of murder and death but this is danganronpa so im going to assume u expected as much

a/n: so we kickin this blog off with a bang, writing for LITERALLY THE ENTIRE TRIGGER HAPPY HAVOC CAST LMFAOAOAOAO (excluding hifumi, yasuhiro, and the two despairs doe bc i’ve already made that clear)

also some character’s sections are shorter than others im sorry i just couldnt think of as many bullet points for them *tiktok cry emoji*

edit: I FORGOT CELSESTE FU K SORRY

spoilers under the cut!!

★ 彡 ★ ミ ★ 彡 ★ ミ ★

makoto naegi

when he realizes he likes you, he doesn’t necessarily panic or anything, but he does get nervous

nervous around you, that is

y’all saw how he was with sayaka

if he says anything that might sound intimate then he’ll immediately rephrase it or reassure he didn’t mean anything by it

he really only does have good intentions but his wording just kinda flops sometimes

he appreciates how you listen to him and value what he says

you don't make him feel dumb or inferior compared to a bunch of ultimates with actual talents

he’ll muster up the courage to tell you eventually

let’s hope his luck comes through 😁

byakuya togami

now when THIS man realizes he likes you, he a bitch nigga bout it 😐

he can't believe he fell for a common plebeian such as you

but it was hard not to

the way you preferred to get to the point

the way you were aware of your situation and didn't sugarcoat how you felt about it, although you certainly were nicer with it than him

he's ruthless

anyways

you knew your priorities and spent no time trying to use your resources

he noticed how much you had in common; in you, he saw himself

and we all know how this mf feels about himself 😐

he’ll be quick to defend you in class trials

he won’t realize he’s doing it but he just subconsciously protects you

but just because he doesn't notice it, don't mean the rest of the class brushes past it as well

yeah they on his ass LMFAOO

kyoko kirigiri

kyoko is very good at keeping her composure so she won’t be very obvious

she’ll probably just hang around you more

she’ll also defend you in class trials, calmly

“oh, it couldn’t have been [name]. i remember seeing them in their dorm around the time the murder took place.”

hifumi probably finna say some dumb shit like “aye what was you doin in their dorm doe” but anyways

she finds you respectable

if you have anything to contribute, she’ll let you take the floor

when she tells you, she’s very composed, but also very indirect LMFAO

she’s not too sure on how to express her interest in you but maybe she’ll go about it like “well, [name], now we’ve made it here, would you like to step back into the world with me?” or somethin else along those lines idk

take her hand

pls

toko fukawa

y’all know her whole “master togami” shtick

yeah so 😁😁😁😁

no but fr, toko ofc still has her borderline stalkerish 🧍🏾‍♀️ tendencies

she’ll often find herself staring at you, either in the library or in the morning meetings everyday at breakfast

but she isn’t as straight forward as she is with byakuya

i actually think she’d be mad shy and non confrontational

the whole thing she kept up with him ? yeah, never again

if you approach her first then she’ll be able to get a few words out but for most of the conversation, she’ll just nervously play with her braids

you’ll most likely put two and two together

unless ur a makoto kinnie bc then you’ll have to wait till someone else puts it in place for u but anyways

if you decide to approach her about it, you’ll kinda be backing her into a corner bc she’s just bad at deflecting things lmao

she’ll eventually confess (begrudgingly but hey i mean its better than nothing)

expect much stuttering and a gesture like giving you a small gift

and not to be that writer that uses japanese terms in english writing but toko seems like a tsundere but not really if that makes sense?? so she’d probably shove it in your hands and if you try to say something then she’ll just try to play it off as not a big deal lol

calls u a baka 😍😍

aoi asahina

i know y’all all see how she is with sakura

yeah.

aoi is the kind of person who’d like to spend time with their crush rather than shy away from them

she values you and your friendship very much

bring her donuts

just trust me bring her donuts

she doesn’t really realize she’s into you like that for a while but believe me, she is, the whole time

and yeah i think she’d be nervous to tell you bc that’s just natural but ultimately she’d be cool about it

uh oh looks like we goin for a swim

sakura ogami

similar to kyoko, she’s very calm

despite her big and bad appearance, she really is a sweet girl

she cares for you and your well-being very much

will indeed go on x games mode for you

the way she tells you is very sincere and well spoken

kith her

naow

im sorry this is like the shortest one i couldn’t think of much for her 😔😔

leon kuwata

flirtatious ass mf

and he’s lightskin

so this just cannot go well

y’all know that bit where it’s like the guy yawns and stretches his arms up and then wraps one around your shoulder

yeah that’s literally him LMFAOO

he’s very confident

he was fairly well known with the ladies at his old school so you know he’s rhockin wit it ‼️

but

you feel.. different than usual ??

those girls were just lil flings n dates bc he was nice enough to accept their confessions and it boosted his ego anyway so it was a win win

but you

he was genuinely interested in you since he had saw you the first time

he didn’t just acknowledge your appearance

he learnt about your personality and your hobbies and what you liked and such, and he really cared and wanted to hear you talk about it all

he felt the need to really make an effort to show you how much he respected and had affections for you

he doesn't tell you in a grand way

probably just asks you out to a movie or somethin

he's chillin

mondo owada

you know

for being the biggest, baddest, most respected biker gang leader

or just for being in a biker gang period

mondo’s a huge softie lol

yeah he gets violent but he’s a sweet guy who cares about and is loyal to his friends

so mfs need to be nice to you

or they gettin whooped

when he decides it’s time to tell you how he feels, he thinks over his words and he’s all confident there’s no way you’d reject him but then he sees you in the halls and goes 🧍🏾 LMFAOOO

he’ll push through but it’s like he’ll walk up to you and look away from you because he refuses eye contact and just go

“so y/n, would you wanna.. tch.. come to a drive-in movie with me or somethin’?... dumbass.”

real smooth mondo i think you got em good job

please tease him LMFAOO it’d be so funny

he’d probably yell but you can tell he’s not mad so you just keep going with it

but once you’re done tormenting him, you do agree to the movie, don’t worry 🙏🏾

also mondo would call his s/o doll

that is all

chihiro fujisaki

my fav dude in a dress <3

chihiro would be quite shy, but that’s just how he is tbh so no surprise there

he’s very kind so he’d check up on you often just to see how you are

he cares about you v much

the way he confesses is one that consists of a red face as he offers you a box of candy or something similar

and he’d feel honored that you reciprocate his feelings

he’d be very scared to tell you his secret but once he does, he’s delighted to hear it doesn’t make any difference to you

he doesn’t know how he got so lucky with you

not only because woooo they like me back but also because you like him despite,, well everything about him LMFAOO

sweet lil boy

i’d feel like he’d talk about you to alter ego a lot

and when u meet the program for the first time, he’s like “oh! you must be [name]! master’s told me all about you :)”

sobbing i miss him

kiyotaka ishimaru

okay here’s the thing

if taka were to like someone

i can’t tell whether he’d be more strict because he doesn’t want them to get in trouble (and also so it would hopefully divert any suspicion that he DOES like you since he treats you the same as everyone else, only more)

or if he’d hold back more because he favors them LMFAOO

so imma write a lil bit for both

in the case that he was even stricter:

he’d prefer to be around you because he believes the best way he can make sure you stay out of trouble is to make sure you don’t get into any in the first place

of course it’s impossible to monitor you every second of every day but he does his best to make sure you’re doing well

if he sees you do anything out of line, he’s shutting that shit down IMMEDIATELY

but in the case he let up:

he’d still lecture you but noticeably less than the other students

if your feet were resting on top of a desk, he’d ask you to move them and then leave you alone rather than yell at you and forcibly move them himself

if you notice his behavior towards you in comparison to the other students do not tease him about it he will go as red as his eyes /hj

either way he’s confessing to you with a polite but exaggerated bow while holding out a well thought out letter with both hands

sayaka maizono

she will tell you

idk why but i feel like she’d be straight up lol

she’d make sure she’s sincere

she is the ultimate pop idol and all so she wants to make sure you know that she really does like you and isn’t playing a sick joke on you or anything

ok bc

while i do think she’d tell you

i’d feel like she’d be a little indirect just to see how you feel

like she’d give you a free ticket to one of her upcoming concerts with a kind smile

and naturally, you're like :o

and of course you come to support her

and seeing you smile at her from the crowd and cheer her on was the encouragement she needed to push her to ask you out

for real this time

she asks if you wanna come to a concert with her and ur like “oh yeah i love ur shows!!” bc ur dumb and then she’s like “no i mean.. for another artist” and eventually it hits you that she’s asking you out and ur like “oH YEAH YEAH SURE THAT SOUNDS GREAT YEAH OK” LMFAOO

———

i really hope that this is good LMFAOO this is my first time writing for dr so 😃👍🏾

fun fact i finished toko’s section first and taka’s last 😁😁

and i’d like to thank @mius-imagination @bloodygir n the rest of the discord for helping me figure some of these characters out *simultaneously whips and nae naes*

bye ive been working on this for like weeks this took forever

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edit: here’s a deleted section bc i kept blanking for this character 😍

[maschotch]

I know you've gone into detail about a few already, but what would you say are your top 10 hotch headcanons? You don't need to explain them if you don't want to, I just wonder what the list would look like.

ok it was surprisingly hard to think of headcanons?? lmao i think its just hard for me to think of them on the spot? idk i think i just do more character deep dives than actual headcanons. like i’m sure if you asked me about anything in particular i’d be able to give you my opinion/headcanon but thinking of stuff off the cuff is uhhh hard. also im just stupid aaskjdfhgl

he has a hard time sleeping in front of other people and he's a light sleeper, which can make sharing a hotel room difficult sometimes. he's also an early riser, which can sometimes be a little creepy for whoever's bunked up with him for the night: he's still awake when they go to sleep but he's also already showered, dressed, and left them breakfast on the nightstand. it's hard to tell if he's slept at all

he’s an excellent gift giver but he also hates attention so it’ll usually be anonymous. at some point tho they all realize when it’s something from him. he's uncomfortable receiving gifts (more ab hating attention and not feeling like he deserves anything), so the team will just leave things on his desk with a note or something, usually including "no take-backs."

he hates getting his picture taken, but he loves having photos of people he cares about. something something doesnt care about himself something something in his wallet he has a picture of jack, of haley and jack, of jessica and jack, and a lot with the team: one with emily including rossi, one including gideon and elle, one of just penelope and jj, one of just derek and spencer, and one old picture (the only one he has of himself) of him standing between gideon and rossi when he first joined the bau.

he’s good at cooking, but only when he’s following a recipe (which is why he’s also good at baking). so between gideon and rossi he knows how to cook a lot of italian food. but he’s a quick learner and will pick up skills just by watching. he’s very attentive when someone is preparing a meal for him.

he likes most foods and isn’t very picky, but he loses his appetite easily and can handle plainer food better when he’s focused on/upset about something.

he has. a fucking insanely high pain tolerance. like the pain registers and he can definitely feel it, but he doesn’t ever show it. morgan was some combination of awed/horrified when he saw hotch get stitched up for something minor for the first time and the man didn’t so much as wince.

trans hotch!! idek what else to say on this. i just think he’s neat? i don’t think a lot of people on the team know just bc he doesn’t really talk about it a lot. he’s p open about it with garcia tho

autistic hotch is also something that can be so personal. ik @eldrai has written out some amazing hcs in further detail that i’m obsessed with. he’s just got very specific things that makes him feel safe; a few things that have to be a certain way for him to feel comfortable/normal like his clothing; he has a hard time expressing what he’s feeling which is something he’s gotten better at over the years; he’s actually pretty good at deciphering social cues but only when he’s actively thinking about it; bc of his childhood he’s learned to stim in very small movements like touching his thumbs to his fingers. lots of other stuff too but those are the things that come to mind.

every hc for hotch’s backstory is genuinely gonna be way too fuckin long to put in a bullet list. especially the kind of detail @t4thotchniss and i have put into it. goin over the basics: super violent father, mom’s psyche has taken a severe downward spiral after the years of abuse, hotch snaps and beats his father to death, a couple days later his mom burns the house down while he’s out getting groceries. we also like to throw an older sister in there for funsies to a) get baby sean out of the house before their father gets a chance to go after him at this point the sheer brutality of the abuse has gotten so severe that there’s no way a baby would survive the conditions in the house and b) to help hotch’s transition get started pretty early