#so im having faith in reddit. if i don't like it im going to be pissed.

[the-angel-of-the-bottomless-pit]

im supposed to be watching house on haunted hill (2007) but i just keep rewatching botched. send hlep. i just love seeing this giant man chase people and kill them. im thinking about what under that gay little outfit looks like.

[ben-wisehart]

hi! do you ever feel like the bingqiu fandom is binghe biased? like a lot of the time its giving.. “wow binghe is our little precious bun who deserves the world and more! ..oh and stinky neet loser sqq is so blessed to have him lul” it feels unfair towards sqq :( it makes me sad hes no ones fave but thats okay like whatever right? but even when its bingqiu hes treated like an afterthought. like we have binghe fans criticising sqq for not doing more, sj fans are frankly delusional, sqh fans think hes “too mean” to their precious hamster, liushen fans only like him bc hes a good hole/dick for lqg (obligatory “not all men” lol) idk i only follow a handful of svsss twt accs because no one seems to like him, he feels either tolerated or treated as a gag character lol 🥹

i just dislike a lot of fanon bingqiu i think? i read all the books before hopping on twitter and i see some absolute rancid takes on there like the woobification of Shaun(tm) qinghua and jiumei.. which is easy enough to avoid tbf so whatever floats their boat idc. but when i follow bingqiu accs, it feels like OC x OC rather than ~bingqiu~ if that makes sense? like i LOVE the manipulative crybaby domtop x flustered thin face subby pillow princess they have going on!! and fanon bingqiu is just.. not it? and obv id never send hate or anything (i just block and keep it moving) but it makes it kinda sucky when the fandom is already teeny tiny and a large chunk of the fandom isnt what i envisioned/expected i guess which is so odd! when they essentially erase canon!! if it’s like some queerbaity ship or whatever, people can characterise them however they want but its like CANON how they act/are in bed/etc and its all taken away!!! idk im probably just whining sorry 😭

(i included all my thoughts here sorry for the spam!!)

hey, thanks for stopping by!! I definitely know what you mean with regards to SQQ, but I will assure you that there are very much still plenty of dedicated "sqq mains" out there. My sphere of influence on twitter is heavily biased toward people for whom sqq is their favourite character, so maybe I'm not getting a representative sample of the fandom overall, but he's definitely a very well loved character and has more than his fair share of people who do him justice in their writing and for whom he's their primary blorbo!! I remember posting this on reddit a while back and more than half of the responses (though admittedly a small sample size) had him as their fave. So, I don't think he's without appreciation!

But with that said, I do get where you’re coming from. I’m not gonna talk about readers who take his actions in bad faith and actively dislike him (HOW??), but as you’ve said, even among people who do like him, we don’t always understand him as well as we could. Most fans do get on some level that he’s an unreliable narrator, but it’s still very common for people to take him at face value and completely miss his depth. He’s a funny little guy with amusing narration, but he’s also kind and selfless, and he’s also smart and witty, and obnoxious and annoying, and frankly pretty insensitive, and deeply, deeply traumatised—and a million other things! He has layers.

I think all popular characters in fandom will inevitably start getting boiled down to a few key traits. And as somebody who’s been writing fic for 15 years, it’s really hard not to let your own biases colour your portrayal? I absolutely do it with SQQ!! I focus on his kinder, warmer aspects and downplay his flaws, I’ll readily admit that. We all get drawn to a favourite character for a certain trait, and that trait becomes the grit around which our interpretations form. If you’re somebody that likes silly characters, you’re going to write SQQ and dial his silliness up to eleven. If you like kind characters, you’ll write SQQ with emphasis on his kindness. None of these traits are OOC in and of themselves, but if you start to only read fanfic and don’t revisit the source material, you can get lost in what’s popular and forget all the depth that actually made them interesting in the first place. And once you’ve grown attached to a particular version of the characters in your head, it can be really hard to let go of it. I don’t really know where I’m going with this, but I'll add that I think protagonists are just particularly prone to this happening because they're usually the one the audience relates to most.

Idk if any of that really addresses the stuff you were talking about. You mentioned dom top Binghe/pillow princess sqq and to be honest I’m kind of reluctant to talk about this in depth because I’ve received negative comments in the past for supposedly being anti-bottom Binghe, when all I’ve ever said on this matter is that I think it’s a bit weird to insist that “I’m scared of hurting you so I might as well let you do it” is proof that Binghe is canonically a bottom. The fact that someone found that statement so threatening to their view of the characters that they would go to my ao3 page, click on the first fic they saw that happened to feature bottom SQQ and leave their holier-than-thou anonymous opinion there is just bizarre to me.

To be honest tho, it tends to be Binghe characterisation that puts me off moreso than Shen Qingqiu. The only SQQ characterisation that truly bothers me is when people write him as willing to hurt Binghe, or willing to do anything with underage Binghe, but there is a LOT of Binghe stuff that I’m sensitive too. Idk if you read this thread of mine but like, even my friends whom I love make “Binghe stalking/imprisoning/"atticwifing" SQQ” jokes and these bother me way more than any random stranger saying SQQ would get off on spanking Binghe.

And like, it’s kind of hard because objectively, Binghe is a very dark character, so it doesn't feel particularly OOC to say he would do those things, but it's about framing. It bothers me when the emphasis is on how fucked up he is and not how hard he's trying, because it implies a level of futility that I just don’t think is there in canon. To me the beauty of him is in how much doing right by SQQ doesn't come naturally to him, but he ultimately decides to do it anyway because he wants SQQ to be happy. (I feel it needs to be said that I don't mean this in a judgy "if you write dark Binghe you don't understand him and are a bad person" way. Just that I myself can't handle that, and I strongly disagree if you think it's where Bingqiu's relationship is headed).

but idk, I've found my corner and I'm very happy here. I actually don't read fic as often as you'd think, mostly because I am sooooo picky, so I totally get where you're coming from :) but the fandom is still decently sized and very diverse, so there are always going to be at least a few people who share your feelings, if you can find them!

[ranseur]

just fyi in case you weren't aware - brandon sanderson has talked about still being a practicing member of the mormon church despite the homophobia/human rights stuff the church supports

hi anon i wasn't aware of this! i'm surprised actually because his portrayals of queer characters in his books didn't give me the impression he was homophobic or against human rights, himself.

looking into it more- i see that he addressed his relationship w the LDS church in a recent AMA on reddit. to summarize, it seems like he's saying that he is pro-lgbtq+, that while he is still learning how to be better, he stays with LDS with the hopes that the community's stance on lgbtq+ people will change. and how he contributes to that shift is that many members of LDS read his books (i guess because he is a member) and through his books they see his nuanced portrayals of lgbtq+ characters. (https://www.reddit.com/r/books/comments/vtua7m/comment/ifa50ab/) that said, it does make me uncomfortable to learn his tithes potentially go towards harmful things that I am against. though it seems that based on his comments the homophobia is something he genuinely wrestles with, and openly denounces. I think if someone chooses not to read his books due to his faith, that's a very fair choice. on the other hand I respect Sanderson for admitting that his faith and political beliefs don't always align and for learning the progressive beliefs that he currently holds. i'm atheist and ex-christian; so i can sympathize with people who have complex relationships with their spiritual leaders and their personal faith. (personally I chose to leave and never look back) granted i haven't had a lot of time to think about this; but i'm wondering, and hoping this is fair to ask: if Sanderson's personal beliefs don't align with what other mormons believe, would it be fair to hold their beliefs against him by association? and if it is fair, then would I have to start holding every religious person accountable for any uncouth things that their religious text says or their leaders are responsible for? or could a person denounce those things, and be left to practice their faith in their own way? this is not an easy conversation to have- so its very fair if you won't agree with me but i hope i didn't come across as unfair. i think Sanderson isn't malicious, unlike Rowling who sucks, and i don't think he specifically supports or ignores the homophobia and anti-human rights that the church supports. also, sorry if this was long- im not good at being succinct.

[automatismoateo]

I was splashed with "holy water" without consent at the catholic hospital I work at and I'm actually really frustrated about it. via /r/atheism

I was splashed with "holy water", without consent, at the catholic hospital I work at and I'm actually really frustrated about it. Hello all. Ive been a redditor for a few years and have only commented on the subreddits that I've joined, but this is my first time ever posting something. That being said, I'm an active member in my smallish hometown's subreddit and I don't want anyone figuring out that it's me that's posting this (hence this throwaway account I just made 5 minutes ago) so I just wanted to preface all that. I work in the ER/ED of a catholic hospital that I live 5 Mins away from. I graduated with a Bachelor's degree in biology just over 2 years ago and, having only worked in restaurants my entire life (Im in my 30s), thought it would be a good idea to work in a hospital setting to build my resume bc i want to go to med school/ PA school. So I've worked in this catholic hospital for almost 2 years as a tech since it was the only hospital that would even give me an interview. That being said, in the interview I was assured they were inclusive of all religions etc. Since I'm a pretty outgoing person, most people know I'm extremely anti religion/ Christianity/ catholicism whatever. I even have a pin on my badge that says "maybe today Satan". Fast forward to the event- one of the deacons/priests came to our unit about 10 mins after we had all gotten on the floor and said "everybody huddle up I have some holy water I would like to say a prayer and bless everyone". So I kind of snuck out of the area in order to not be around this witchcraft thing. I just went to the nutrition room, grabbed a coffee and waited about 2 mins for it to be done. I come out of the room and I'm walking to the area I need to be in and I see the priest walking down the hall towards me with his potion, spraying the area as he walks along. As I walk by him, he sprays me with it and I go "are you serious? Why would you do that I didn't want that on me and frankly makes me uncomfortable". To which he replied "oh relax you're not going to sizzle up or catch on fire I know you're a good guy" (he doesn't know I'm an atheist). And then proceeded to splash me AGAIN with this super sacred water. I legit was just in disbelief that it happened and I just stood there for a second and walked to my other coworkers and immediately starting saying what happened and that it bothered me that he didn't ask me for permission nor respect the boundaries I had quite explicitly laid out. My coworkers were like "he's just trying to bless u blah blah holy water is a good thing" etc. Am I overreacting? Probably. I feel like I am but it just seriously bothers me that I tried to avoid the situation and then he just disregarded me asking him to not do that. Yes, I'm aware of where I work and all that but this is a giant catholic hospital network in multiple states and they're accepting of all faiths (or lack of) and so my thought process is what if he did that to someone who was Muslim or Buddhist or something else? I really shouldn't be surprised I suppose though I mean it's not unheard of for a catholic priest to not care about consent with altar boys or anything. Tldr: splashed by a priest with holy water while walking by him at the catholic hospital I work at, asked him to not do that and he proceeds to do it again. Submitted September 21, 2023 at 06:18PM by LeftMountain5968 (From Reddit https://ift.tt/r0mNK9s)

[babygirldennis]

This shit is fake bby!!!

Here she is.. My masterpost of all the dumb, illogical bits of info contained within these s15 “leaks” that make me fairly confident they are complete bullshit. It also includes my little tinhat theories that have absolutely no evidence.

I will be putting it all under a Readmore in case you don't want to risk it or if you simply Do Not Care

First up, I'd like to point out that these call sheets repeatedly give very detailed backstories to characters that have few lines which conveniently paints a picture of each episode's plot. And I'm not an expert so correct me if I'm wrong, but after looking at other similar casting calls, they only ever include the demographic and necessary skills.

Basically who in their right mind would write up casting calls that give away so many spoilers? Seems like that could cause and issue if they were leaked lol. But anyway that's my 1st point. But onto the actual content

So the conceit of this episode as a whole is that during the pandemic, the gang "gamed the system" and received three (3!) Loans to start businesses that went bankrupt. One of these businesses is implied to be the one started by dee and charlie who end up selling to Qanon shaman. Already this is so impossible baby.

1. We've already seen the gang try to get a loan and it didn't work. They don't have good ideas. Ur telling me, they managed to finagle 3 separate loans for 3 separate business ideas from an actual bank?

2. Maybe I just have bad reading comprehension but how does one have a business that is both fictitious and bankrupt?

3. If the customer is supposed to be Qanon shaman, an actual real life guy, why are the only descriptors white and male? They say he's shirtless so are they going to paint on all of the tattoos he has? And if so, doesn't that kind of ruin the dramatic reveal when charlie "throws in" the viking helmet? Why would he do that anyways? Sus.

Moving on

Alright this episode would fucking blow for obvious reasons but im going to refrain from looking at this through my gay dennis thruther lens because im biased.

Purely from a narrative standpoint, a woman hasn't been shown to be interested in dennis in nearly 5 years during the wade boggs episode. Ever since, every single woman he approaches has been actively creeped out by him. And now I'm supposed to believe that 3 "smart, passionate woman" (In Their Twenties!!!!!!) agreed to go on a date with him? And Anna even slept with him! Just because he what? Agreed with her? I'm not buyin it.

Plus the concept of this scenario lacks any potential for comedy. When iasip gets political, they always discuss a very specific topic using hyperbolic situations and flawed metaphors. If this is supposed to be a political episode, what ultimately lukewarm point would rob be trying to make here? So far we know they're ranting about

The patriarchy

Privilege

Socialism

No more personal responsibility(?)

The... nature of power in society(??)

How on earth would an episode like get approved? This shit sounds like a Ted talk. It sounds like it was written specifically to sound like a political episode so boring and pointless it would generate outrage and mile long essay posts from Tumblr users and reddit users alike. Almost like this one lol.

On a completely unrelated note, do not try and convince me that Frank "casual cock ring wearer" Reynolds is unable to perform.

Jeez this is getting out of hand fast. Let's move on

Ok now we're starting to getting into the Ireland of it all. Let me go on a bit of a tangent here about all this.. Now I thinq there are just 3 possibilities. Either this is all a publicity stunt and there is some truth to the Ireland rumors, the entire thing could be bogus from some weirdo fan (ps, if a fan did write this I want you to know I fucking hate you. You did this to me), or it is a publicity stunt but Ireland is just more bullshit.

I am going to assume it was a publicity stunt, otherwise I just wasted my entire evening and I can't have that kind of mentality rn. Additionally, I'm Going to tinhat here for a second and say that the Ireland rumors are true, but the details are different.

I say this because if they were going to do filming in Ireland, they probably figured that that information would be impossible to hide. In essence, my completely unfounded hypothesis is that this leak was their fucked up little way of controlling the situation while simultaneously messing with us.

Ok tangent is over, returning to the casting calls. From the looks of it, dee starts a "scam" acting class and has some very devoted students (Note that Tony was also the name of the porn shop owner. Seems weird!) Presumably after the gang replaces her with a monkey as the title suggests.

Honestly, there isn't too much here that's a red flag to me... seems like a nice little dee-centric episode that is the link to the Dublin angle. Assuming I am At All right, this could be a genuine plotline for Dee. However, the monkey could be a red herring and there could be a whole different side plot with the guys. who's to say. Next one!

Ah yes this is the dennis we all know and despise.. no red flags for me here really, I'm also running out of steam because idk if it shows, but I am majorly sleep deprived atm. Anyway I'm going to the next one

Okay this is where things start getting weird again ough a migraine just hit, anyway back to my earlier point about how casting calls would never contains major spoilers bc the people who see these wont be under any kind of NDA..

These ones reveal that bonnie dies. Again, that info wouldn't be in a casting call.

But also they suggest charlie has a irish penpal named Shelley who is his biological father. First off charlie is illiterate, although as pointed out by @undeadbreeze shelley could also be communicating in symbols. However, this scenario is still unbelievable to me for a couple reasons:

1. Bonnie's last name is Kelly obviously, and we know it's her maiden name because Jack's last name is also Kelly. But Shelley's last name is... also Kelly? In the context of this big ol hoax, it feels like it was written to show that look! his last name is the same as charlie's! That's how you know that's his dad! But It would be way too big of a coincidence if charlie's dad happened to have the same last name bonnie.

And 2. There's the whole mystery of charlie's long-lost sister from 'charlie got molested' but never any mention of a brother which according to this, shelley has been pretending to be his brother for years. And we all know how much rcg loves their continuity, it seems uncharacteristically lazy to just tack this on without any prior buildup.

And finally let me talk about mac for a second and specifically the line in gus's summary "both are gay men who are attracted to the priesthood for all the wrong reasons"

Iasip has commented on pedophilia in the priesthood many times in the past which leads me to believe that they are implying that mac is a pedophile? Please let me know if I completely misread the implications of that statement, but if not, then that is completely insane and one of the biggest indictators that this is fake. Mac is awful, just like everyone in the gang but he is definitely not a pedophile.

However even if i did completely misread that, it's still proof this is fake.. For all his faults, Rob put a surprising amount of care and effort into mac's coming-out. It hasn't been perfect, but Mfhp in particular firmly established that mac's faith is integral to his identity so Its unlikely that rob would throw all of that away for a cheap shot at priests.

Ok my brain is irradiated sludge at this point, but in conclusion. I hope that 1. I'm right, at least about it being fake (Otherwise damb that'll be so humiliating for me) And 2. This eases ur fears a bit. I don't want to lose all faith in future seasons bc I love iasip and miss the gang. If you read this far youre insane but I literally love you so goddamn much because I spent so so long tapping this out on my silly little phone

Please feel free to add on or message me your thoughts and opinions I need to know I'm not the only one who uhhh went a bit insane. And finally: whoever made these is a cunt. Mwah.

[knifelesbianjo]

the whole tyrell "being on a bus" theory makes a lot more sense now! sam couldnt have him be there for the meeting as it would be too easy, so sam "put him on a bus" to temporarily write him out of the story. and now that the meeting is over and the hack is done, i think we'll see him again soon. i don't think it'll be next episode, i think that one will focus more on dom and darlene. but maybe the ep after that. or sam might wait till the finale cause he loves screwing with us lol

(2/3) also, a few more thoughts, hope you dont mind! i feel like in the next few eps, elliot and mr robot (and maybe the other alters?) are finally gonna go over why tyrell seems so linked to elliot. all the connections and parallels sam put in are there for a reason, so i think we're gonna get some dream-like sequences that give more insight. and then maybe after that, tyrell comes back and him and elliot talk stuff out. i hope, at least. elliot rly needs to process stuff lol

(3/3) another thing just occurred to me while i was typing up that last ask! there was a reddit thread where people were talking about how tyrell seems like a confused kid/childlike in some ways, with the way he handles his emotions and stuff. and then i thought about how little elliot was sitting in his chair in that office room. was tyrell coming off as childish intentional, and does it have anything to do w/ little elliot sitting in his chair?? what does it all mean??? give me answers esmail pls

Thank you so much for the asks!! I loved answering these ❤

Yes!! A hundred times yes, this is what i've been trying to say, the "being on a bus" theory is so obvious now, Tyrell's gonna be back I'm sure. But you're right about next episode, my bet is that we're going to see very little Elliot and it's going to be mostly Darlene and Dom because it's going to be their last episode (they will probably appear at the end, but this is their last storyline) and at this point is pretty obvious that they're endgame (yay!) and are going to leave together, and it's gonna be only Elliot's story from there on

Maybe i'm having too much faith in smail, but yes, i really think all the parallels and little details are gonna bre brought up again, and we're probably going to see at least one more dream sequence with Elliot were things start to get clear. There's people in twitter talking about a dream wedding 'cause there are some photos from the shooting that look really like a wedding, so i'm even more certain that we're going to go down Elliot's head again and see a lot of dreams. Now my question is, who is waiting for him at the altar?? I would normally say that it's going to be Angela, but if they're not cowards and are going with Tyrell not being dead it really should be him, it would be a nice way for Elliot to realize his feeling. But all of this is me fantasizing, so only time will tell if im' being a clown

But I really hope that they give time to Elliot to process stuff ‘cause he needs it, and then he can work on his relationship with someone else (Tyrell and maybe explain things to Darlene)

About Tyrell being childish, i have absolutely no idea. I'm completely lost with what's going on in Elliot's head. That scene really looked like it was a reference to Tyrell but i don't know what they were tyring to say with it. I think that there's still a lot we don't know and things are going to start making sense in the next episodes.

[skylesbian]

(connor anon 1/4) hard agree! there's so many references to connor sleeping with older men and i wish they had covered how that started happening and whether he maybe blamed himself for it. re: pam letting him sleep with older men, maybe she was scared of connor leaving him like his dad did if she was too strict of a mother? we shall never know :( i really wanted more about his dynamics with pam, i feel like there's maybe a bit of unhealthy codependency there that could have been explored.

(2/4) and omg do not get me started on connor's mental health. about 5 years ago i saw a post about him meeting the criteria for borderline personality disorder and i have been ride or die for that theory ever since - he literally has every symptom. AND they've been sprinkling in panic attacks, breakdowns, depression and suicidal ideation since 1x04, and i'm really pissed that the writers haven't expanded on it properly, or had any of the other characters except annalise acknowledge it in-canon.

(3/4) yeah, i hate that they retconned the fact that annalise saw him as a worrier and gave him the trophy because of that. although i did see a theory on reddit that connor's panic attack in the next episode promo is because annalise is "discrediting the witness" by telling him why he was really chosen, which i would absolutely love, but i won't get my hopes up lol. it's a lovely scene (i absolutely love bonnie so it's nice to see my two faves interacting), but ultimately it's a disappointment.

(4/4) my theory about the last two episodes is that connor will try to take the fall for everything - when they had the "snow white" case for their final exam that's what he went with as a defence, and given the fact that he's been so uncomfortable with all the murders and specifically said he couldn't live with annalise being executed for it, i think the new deal he signed sells himself out to protect the others. it's in-character for him, but i also really don't want him to go to jail :(

hello, my love!

gonna reply under a read more, otherwise this post will be too long sdlfkj

i like that theory of pam being scared of connor leaving like his father!! and their relationship is pretty unhealthy to me, yeah. also, whatever her reasons were, it doesnt justify her. but i’d love to know everything we don’t know about it!! about his relationship with his dad, too!

i can see connor having bpd! he definitely is pretty fucked up tho, has mental breakdowns, panic attacks, and a history of suicide ideation, and it makes me so mad that this hasnt been acknowledged properly!! and i dont think there’s time for him to deal with it properly now :(

haha yeah, bonnie is one of my faves, and its funny because she murdered two innocent people but i always am like “my baby!!”

omg!! i really would love that! if annalise just said it like that in court!! i can also see connor trying to take the blame. very in-character. i can see these two theories connect, too, like it’s the only way i can see them exploring connor’s backstory in the last two episodes. i mean something has to happen now, right? after he took a different deal, it’s for something, RIGHT? but i really, really think connor will end up free and with oliver. like idk about anyone else, but i truly have faith for those 2 to end up happy. i dont wanna be a clown, but yknow, pete is gay, everyone has been rooting for coliver since day 1, they know how much the representation means to so many people. and iirc jack tweeted smth like “pete just sent me a message that made me really happy. you guys are gonna love the last few episodes” or smth like that, that made me think that it was kind of decided. idk, again, maybe im being a clown, but i trust jack falahee ksjdfsdkf he really does love connor and coliver.

oh man, i hadnt even thought about those theories you sent, but now im even more excited and nervous about next episode!! probably gonna be disappointed tho, but who knows!!

thanks as always for your messages!! really love them :) feel free to send me all the messages you want, btw! love talking to you. 

sending loads of love your way!

[galntis98]

Everyone leaves, even your therapist.

Woke up super early for my therapy session. Hadn't seen my therapist in 1-2 months. She broke the news that she would not be working at (redacted) anymore. Asked her if she was going to work at a private place and she said she was migrating completely. I started feeling numb and then overwhelmed with everything that i broke down crying in front of her.

Why was i upset by her leaving? I wanted to switch therapists/quit therapy/life completely so I shouldn't be this upset but i am. I realised my therapist leaving brought up in this weird abandonment issues for me. I went to work after the session and my mind was so preoccupied by my therapist that i kept fucking things up. I wrapped a newborn boy up with a pink wrap and stared at the baby for quite a while until i realised my mistake. I went to the wrong floor. I misplaced my work pass. I was a mess.

I couldnt stop crying or having this strong urge to cry. I cried in front of my therapist. I teared up on the way to the mrt. Cried softly at the back of the cab on the way to work. Teared up again when heading to my fav place.

I told my reddit friend about the news and she was furious for me.

"Your therapist knew she had to leave for a long time, she should have told you that as soon as she could, she has an ethical obligation to tell you such information so that you can then decide whether you want to continue working with her or see someone else. You opened up to her and invested in the relationship, you did that while under the assumption that she wouldn’t just ditch you and go. And this is a therapist who already knew that you have already experienced a loss this year. Filling out migration papers takes ages. It doesn’t just happen in an instance, she would have known about this for a Long time."

....

"These therapists don't understand the sort of trust patients place in them, they don't understand attachment, they don't understand abandonment issues."

Me being me, with my trust issues for authority figures (that runs super deep btw), of course I had my doubts every now and then about her and my psych. But i had mostly faith and trust in them. I actually thought she cared lol. Right now im feeling like she was just doing her job.... I dont think she gave as many fucks as i thought she did. I really did open up to her. I told her things i never told my previous therapist about. I didnt really hold back on her. I feel stupid. I feel upset. I feel regret. Frustration. Not anger but who knows it'll kick in soon but for now.... I am just so overwhelmed with sadness by this entire thing.

What's my takeaway on this entire situation? I guess life just sucks. Everyone leaves, even your therapist lol.

[automatismoateo]

I have the perfect analogy for religion/religious people who don't understand why its so hard for them to convince atheists of their arguments. via /r/atheism

Submitted May 08, 2018 at 03:15PM by SignificantLeading4 (Via reddit https://ift.tt/2KMTIk2) I have the perfect analogy for religion/religious people who don't understand why its so hard for them to convince atheists of their arguments.

This happened to me some years ago back when I was getting married. My wife and I wanted to pick out engagement rings, and decided we would pick them out together in store. Oh boy was that a mistake! A bit of advice to my fellow men: Don't ever take your wife out jewelry shopping, buy them gifts. Specifically if its for a wedding/engagement. There are two reasons for this: First the female clerks jump all over the women to try and sell them stuff. Second: Women (not just in this story) but in general, for whatever reason, just become enamored with engagement and marriage in a way men just don't.

Here is the key thing about this story: We are going to purchase these things in cash (well card but whatever.)

This story pisses me off to this day:

So we walk into this jewelry store just to look. We plan on going to three jewelery stores before making a decision. I decide against getting diamonds on my ring as I find them disgusting (ethical reasons, just look it up). My fiancée at the time agrees as we walk into the store. We come in and as soon as these women her my fiancée (now wife) say the words "Engagement ring" every single clerk not working with a client, stops, walks over, and begins more or less complimenting her, and begging her to use them as their representative.

Now I'm as far from a neck beard as it comes but it becomes increasingly clear these women are only interested in getting money out of her, and are total pieces of shit. I mean that was clear from the outset (its a business) but they are playing up her getting engaged.

Now before my "GET THE FUCK OUT" alarms are going off they pull me away from her to look at rings for me. I don't think anything of it: Shes a rational human being.

So we find me a ring, go back over to her and she tells me "Hey! I put this on a loan. What do you think of this ring?" The loan they talked her into is a sleezy, underhanded, third rate, bullshit, cost 2.5 times as much for the item, loan. We aren't rich at this point, but we aren't poor either. Neither of us have credit because we buy in cash or not at all (even our cars and our house.) I look at her "Aren't we...paying in full?"

Fiancee: "Oh well I figured we could build credit this way. We will eventually need it to buy a house."

Me: "You know that loans cost money right? That you have to pay? How much is the loan for?"

Sales clerk: "Its for the exact amount." (A lie, its for double the amount.)

Me: "So the ring costs xxxx and the loan costs exactly the same?"

Sales Clerk: "Yes."

Me: "So the total cost of the loan and ring are [figure]"

Sales Clerk: "Oh no, the loan is only 200 more."

Me (To girl friend): "Something doesn't feel right here, we should leave."

At this point my girlfriend, who hasn't read a single document shes signed because they talked her out of it and refused to let her read it (by her account later.) looks at me and says "All these people think this ring makes me look beautiful! I really love it, I want it!"

I look at her: "Yeah but something isn't right here."

At this point the sales staff begin circling around her before I can actually talk her down and complimenting her. The only sales staff left starts insulting me "You are rude! You are ruining her experience! You are just trying to mess things up!" I look at her "Yeah we don't need a loan, and you are damn straight! Im a rude asshole. So we need to get this loan undone!" The sales clerk looks at me and says "To late, she signed it." And openly makes fun of both me and her.

It was really weird. It was like she (my fiancee) couldn't hear what I was saying in the store. I'm telling her the cold hard truth that something isn't right, and these people are trying to screw her over. She won't listen. She just keeps saying things like "I love it, and this is going to help. I love you. I'm so glad we are getting married." It was seriously like she was on some kind of drug, or sleep walking. And on top of that all the women in the store treated her like she was the (I have no better word for this, so forgive me) "Alpha Woman." And my Fiancee, whom up until meeting me was over weight (For all the plebs out there /s, I lift, and I got her into lifting), and mistreated by her family, and bullied, like she was just so fucking happy for once people were treating her the way she wanted to be treated that it just put a fucking blind fold on her eyes. I can't stress enough how spell like it felt trying to tell her "this is the reality of the situation" to hear the women around her be mean to mean, compliment her, and it just erased everything I said about reality.

Well two days of me explaining to her that they used a loan shark business to get that loan, she finally looks the place up, the money is removed from her account: She. Flips. Shit. She is literally screaming in our apartment about how they 'duped her' and how upset it made her. I looked at her and said "Yeah I tried to tell you in the store." She was more upset upon realizing that they were only using her emotions to get her into that contract. Edit: I never pushed that she did something wrong. Her family wasn't ever there for her. I just said "I feel weird saying this but: Let this be a lesson that people will fuck you over if given the opportunity."

Well a call to their corporate two days later about the event got us our money back, a 15% discount on the ring, and they fired the sales clerk handling her purchasing the ring and the manager of the store, like in front of us. Turns out they were going through that loan place and pushing it really hard because the loan place was giving them kick backs for it. The come down from that was hard on her. I watched her wallow in tears for something like 2 weeks because of it.

One thing she couldn't give up was that ring. She just had to much emotion put into it. We literally bought it despite the fact that I wanted a refund and to go to a different store.

Compare that attitude to religious people: They have tons of people confirming that god is real, their faith is true. Any outsiders trying to speak about how bullshit it is get shouted down. Even if your words make the ears of the person you are talking to, they just use jargon and don't actually listen to you. Its all a convenient lie over what appears to be a hard truth. And some times even when you convince them the faith is bullshit, they just can't give up the comfort of god.

Edit: Also for anyone wondering what happened when we went back into the store to undo the loan. Every member of staff previously complimenting her was insulting both her and myself.