#so if someone is willing to find images for her different outfits and describe her appearance

[psychicdisaster]

Hmm I wonder who did this to the wiki.

[jokerfan99]

My Top 10 Favorite Anime Villains (Updated) by DarkChild316

In a different time and a different world, I did a list of “My 10 Favorite Anime Villains”. I am older now, and hopefully much wiser and now thanks to the global pandemic and my new subscriptions to Hulu and Funimation I’ve had the opportunity to go back and revisit so many classic anime that I feel like I should re-do it. Plus I’ve gone back and looked at my previous list and shook my head thinking to myself: “My God man, what in the f**k were you thinking with some of these choices!” So, I’ve gone back and redone the list, now this list is strictly for the men only. If you want to see a list dedicated to my favorite female villains, check out my list of “My Top 10 Favorite Anime Villainesses.” But for this list, here is my updated list of My Top 10 Favorite Anime Villains:

#10. Shishiho Makoto (Rurouni Kenshin): Growing up as a kid, Ruroni Kenshin was one of the first anime I had ever watched, and this guy was someone who I hated with a passion. Looking back at it years later, I realize now what an amazing villain and foil to Kenshin that Makoto was. Unlike a lot of villains on this list, Makoto wasn’t just evil for the sake of being evil, Makoto’s evil came from the worst type of trauma: betrayal! In this case the betrayal came from Makoto’s own government, where Makoto survived not only multiple gunshots, but being doused in oil and burned alive, leaving him in complete and utter agony. What puts Shishio on my list is what he manages to do after surviving death. He compiles an army of the best fighters Japan has to offer and plots to overthrow the entire Meiji Government. While in complete agony. Who else can claim that? Did I also mention he’s topping the list of the best fighters in the show? His swordsmanship is second only to Kenshin himself as he proves in their absolutely epic fight.

#9. Hisoka Morrow (Hunter x Hunter): Hunter x Hunter is a show with several great villains that truly stand out, and while Meruem was memorable, pardon me for believing that Hisoka was the standout villain from that show. A devious killer and master Nen user, Hisoka is driven by little more than his desire to find and kill strong opponents. Be they young children or master criminals, he’ll pursue them to the ends of the Earth with a bloodlust on par with that of a wild predator. Likewise, he doesn’t care what happens to himself or others in this pursuit. Mass civilian casualties, the loss of his own villainous allies or even the loss of his own limbs barely phases him, so long as he gets to fight with someone that tests his limits. As a result, he more often than not embodies chaos incarnate, wreaking havoc in his pursuit of battle and leaving a mountain of corpses behind him. Needless to say, this puts him at odds with the series’ protagonists at regular intervals. Not only do Gon and his friends fit the bill for what he seeks, but they often take on enemies that prove to be exactly what Hisoka is looking for. And yet, this also serves to make him all the more interesting. Where other villains might strike out at the protagonists and heroes immediately, Hisoka schemes, allies himself with and double-crosses people regularly, always finding the best angle to work in order to reach his goals. He may not be a world-ending anime villain on the level of a Meruem with seismic ambitions, but he’s undeniably the most interesting and brilliant villain in Hunter x Hunter to see at work.

#8. Izaya Orihara (Durarara!!): If you think of a list of top anime villains and this guy isn’t one of the first people who comes to mind, please raise your hands so I can have a few words with you in private with no cameras or eyewitnesses. The crazy thing about Izaya is that he doesn’t even realize he’s evil, and that’s what makes him great. He loves humanity; from the depths of his bones he loves us all. This is why he makes it onto my list; he does progressively more cruel acts against humans, putting people in situations that generally lead to their deaths. He is also a master of parkour and highly skilled with a switchblade in his hand (as evident in the above picture), which he generally only uses in dire situations or fights against Shizuo. In short, I absoulutely love this guy. I thoroughly enjoyed the way he manages to manipulate an entire populous, and that’s why he’s more than earned a spot on my list.

#7. Dio Brando (Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure): You might have thought it was someone else, but it was me, Dio! All meme-worthy jokes aside, Dio Brando is unquestionably one of the most iconic anime villains of all time and, thanks to his series’ late-blooming popularity outside of Japan thanks largely to the 2012 anime adaptation, one that still feels modern in our minds. Dio is a tenacious bastard that takes advantage of the generosity of the Joestar family to further his own power, being intolerably dickish to Jonathan by constantly tearing him down, trying to make him look bad in front of his dad, spreading rumors to sully his reputation, and sabotaging his relationships. This escalates into killing his dog (his f***ikg dog of all things!), poisoning and later stabbing his adoptive father (I mean WTF!), and becoming a freakin vampire. Even after decapitation, Dio gets his revenge and sets in motion many of the events of the series, making a formal return in Stardust Crusaders as the main villain once again. With raw ambition taken to the extreme, iconic lines, poses, and outfits, incredible abilities from Aztec mask-induced vampirism and the time-stopping power of The World, Dio’s menacing presence towers over his series and over anime as a whole, which makes him MORE than deserving of a spot on my list.

#6. Light Yagami (Death Note): Yes, he’s a VILLAIN, get over yourselves Light Yagami fanboys! Anyway, there are a number of different adjectives and superlatives that could be used to described the lead character of Death Note: Diabolical, calculating, and determined to make the world in his own image all describe Light who was easily the most clever man in  Death Note, as evidenced by the layers upon layers that composed his elaborate plans.  Light started out as a good kid, doing well in school and heading to a bright career in police work like his father. But when he gets possession of the death note, he begins a remarkable descent into a disturbing mastermind who becomes judge, jury, and executioner for the entire world. But what truly makes Light's character stand out remains complicated throughout the story. His ultimate goal is to make the world a happier, safer place; a noble but perhaps misguided goal. His idealism and nobility still shine through when he doesn’t have the Death Note. When he temporarily relinquishes ownership of the death note to throw L off his trail, Light loses all memory of the death note and he reverts to his normal personality. His sense of morality returns and he shows more compassion for those around him. He even refuses to use Misa Amane to get information out of her when L asks him to. These qualities help to create a complex character who ends up being a detestable villain, yet you still kind of root for him to come out of this story as a winner. Light’s progression through the series is marked by his sheer brilliance. He's got a calculated and strategic mind that would make the great philosopher Machiavelli jealous, and the power of the death note adds a callousness that makes him free to use people in whatever way necessary to accomplish his goals. It’s highly entertaining to see his intricate plans play out. But Light’s messiah-like ego is just as big as his brain, and that arrogance ultimately leads to his tragic downfall.

#5. The Major (Hellsing): An evil Nazi Scientist, I know everyone is just rolling their eyes right now thinking I’m reaching for the low-hanging fruit for this one, but just hear me out here. While he may seem like an obvious pick for a list like this, The Major’s goals, however, are somehow far more unhinged than what may first appear. Despite being an impassioned orator and uncompromising strategist willing to sacrifice countless soldiers, the Major himself had no especial loyalty or passion for the cause of Millennium. His sole obsession is to plunge the world into an unending conflict to the point of endangering not only the lives of others but also his own. The Major’s leadership of Millennium, his decades espousing the genocidal ideology of fascists, and subsequent war against the Hellsing organization, the Vatican, and the entire world serve only as a pretext to satiate his insatiable bloodlust. The Major is one of anime’s most insidious villains, a charismatic, nihilistic sociopath driven purely by his sadomasochistic death wish.

#4. Shou Tucker (Fullmetal Alchemist): Now, you may be recalling that in my previous version of this list, I had Envy listed as my choice as my favorite villain from this show. Well after careful reconsideration, I’ve had to reevaluate my decision and give that spot to this creep, because while Envy’s actions were despicable to a point, they PALE in comparison to this guy! He only really appears in one episode if I remember correctly, yet in that one single episode, he made more of an impact then most villains make in a lifetime, which really says a lot about this guy’s character. What was it that made him so memorable you ask? Well, it could have something to do with the fact that this man transmutaed his own dog and daughter to create a talking chimera, which hadn’t been done before, and for what other reason…all in the name of recognition in the world of alchemy! That mere fact alone made this guy the most hated man in all of anime, the fact that he sacrificed his own family for the sake of fame, with absolutely no hint of remorse, made this guy the definition of an absolute living piece of shit and the only thing worse is how the episode ended, but I won’t spoil that one for you if you haven’t seen it.

#3. Gendo Ikari (Neon Genesis Evangelion) Up next is a man competing with the likes of Medusa Gorgon for the title of “Anime’s Worst Parent”, Gendo Ikari, please step up to the front of the congregation. Now Gendo is a man who’s list of atrocities throughout Evangelion is far too many to name, but I’m going to try my best to list them here: You have being actively complicit in the premature instigation of a biblical apocalypse, resulting in a near extinction-level event that caused the death of nearly two-thirds of the human population. Emotionally neglecting his own son Shinji estranging himself from him for over twelve years, only to offer him up as a sacrificial pawn in his bid to artificially bootstrap humanity’s ascent into evolutionary godhood so that he could be reunited with his dead wife. Cloning said wife’s DNA into a harem of emotionally dependent albino ingenues who share a dogged infatuation for their creator. And that’s not even mentioning the horrific emotional abuse and mental manipulation he inflicts on Dr. Ritsuko Akagi and her mother Naoko. All-in-all Gendo is proof positive that love not only has the capacity to overcome any obstacle, but sometimes it can truly make monsters out of us all.

#2. Griffith (Berserk): Griffith did nothing wrong; at least, not by his own drives and ambitions. A peasant who grew to become the leader of his own mercenary band, Griffith was a self-driven man who pursued his desires with unparalleled efficiency. No matter the situation or obstacle, he found a way to overcome them, whether that meant facing down an army of thousands or assassinating a country’s leaders. All the while, he amassed a legion of friends and followers who would follow him to hell and back, caring for him as much or more than he cared for them. As a result, they were dragged down with him when his ambitions saw him imprisoned, tortured and maimed. They cared little though, risking life and limb to save him and help him salvage a life with what he had left. That wasn’t enough for Griffith though. When given the option to become a demon and continue the pursuit of his dreams, he whole-heartedly accepted it; even though it came at the cost of sacrificing the lives of each and every one of his friends and allies. But that wasn’t the worst of it, to further spite the early desertion of Guts, Griffith proceeds to rape Casca, Guts’ love interest, in front of him as Guts is held down by demons. So yes, Griffith did nothing wrong by himself. By everyone else though, he did them the worst of injustices, and continues to do so with each breath he takes, all of which makes him a compelling and infuriating villain.

#1. Johan Liebert (Monster): I’ve covered a wide variety of monsters (pun fully intended) on this list, but THIS monster (again, pun FULLY intended) truly takes the cake when it comes to anime villains. A serial killer who would fit in well in any blockbuster film, Monster told the story of a man who had truly become monstrous; a charismatic, intelligent sociopath with no other goal than to kill everyone else in the world. Johan didn't just kill people, he made other people into monsters just like him. This skill of his corruption is first displayed in his youth, when he used stories to convince the other boys in his orphanage to kill all the staff, and each other. Johan is often compared to Light Yagami of Death Note, but the two couldn’t be any more different. Light's fatal (and genius) flaw is his own ego, which leads him to put his own life above all else, even his goal of changing the world. But Johan has never been afraid of death. Quite the opposite, he welcomes and embraces it, being more than willing to put his own life at risk, and one of his signature traits is how he challenges people to shoot him. Another of Jonah’s signature traits is his skills as a masterful manipulator. Where Light and other on this list had to resort to supernatural means to get what they wanted, Johan just used his own wits and knowledge of human nature. He's easily the most frightening villain on this list because he’s the truest to life villain on this list and he exposes the base human nature of his victims and of human society. Monster's remarkable story was almost entirely due to Johan alone, and it’s why he’s #1 on my list.

So that's my updated list, what did you guys think about it? Love it, hated it? Go on and tell me what you think and let me know who your favorite anime villains are. See you soon!!!

Deviantart: https://www.deviantart.com/darkchild316

[helenaklein]

Heya, i come across your blog while talking about nelroche etc. I never know anything about l&l since i never play lovestruck, can someone give explanation which part that is similiar? While idk anything about lovestruck, I found their previous work also has similiar with manga yana of the dawn (which i have read the manga, and yes, they are pretty similiar to called it just coincidence).

okay so fair warning... this is long as fuck because there are more similarities than there are differences lol. also as a disclaimer i’m only invested in this whole thing insofar as it entertains me but if the ��””””creators””””” want to fight me because i wrote this post.... they’re welcome to but i promise i’ll have more fun than they will lmfao

l&l’s about a young woman from a major city in our world who one day gets sucked via magical portal into a fantasy world filled with magic and races that are only fiction in ours. once there, she gets mistaken for their most notorious war criminal, an insanely powerful witch who committed a genocide and is center of a cult of worshipers willing to kill and die for her.

this is nelroche’s description, straight from their devblog:

now, if it was a matter of similar basic premises and setups, i’d write it off as coincidence and tell the anons who made me aware of this that i thought they were overreacting. after all, “normal-human sucked into medieval world” and even “mistaken identity” are both very well established tropes that have been done and done again and will continue to be done because many find it compelling. hell, i do too. honestly, if the devs had simply said that they drew inspiration from love & legends, i’d have understood.

but.

the similarities only begin there. and they only get more excessive. coupled with their adamant denial that they’ve never even read it....... it’s just not possible lmfao. even if they decided to change the physical appearances of the characters, the tropes behind them and their personalities are exactly the same.

the nelroche demo has:

1) the lord of a region who’s a massive workaholic to the point of self-detriment, but is very caring towards their people and their inner circle and whom everyone in the group has referred to as a parental figure.

aka.... l&l’s reiner wolfson, who’s described directly from the app as “Reiner is a fair and compassionate ruler who would defend the people of the human domain with his life.”

2) the prickly knight to said lord, who’s fiercely dedicated to their liege, very serious in personality along with stubborn and prideful, but cares deep down once you get past their walls.

literally l&l’s august falke. the demo describes them, literally as “...reminds me of the knights in the fairy tales, except, it seems, not quite as charming” whereas august’s in-app description reads “This knight in shining armor is more aggressive than the story books led you to believe...” I’ll let the similarities there speak for themselves.... lol

3) the energetic and bubbly mage who’s super tiny compared to their companions and avoids serious discussion, who happens to be a bit of a trickster and has a mysterious quality.

l&l’s altea bellerose but make it less pink! altea and “C”s similarities go even deeper but i’ll get into that a bit later.

4) the mysterious and heterochromatic-eyed figure who’s distrustful and initially stand-offish as a result of living through a life of hardship, that is excitable and actually loves to travel.

look no further than l&l’s saerys! M’s eyes are “ocean blue and purple” compared to his blue and red, but don’t let that difference fool you! their introductions are laughably similar (more on that later)... and the “travel” bit lmfao. not to be mean but they couldn’t at least change up his hobbies? come on now, work for that plagiarized bag!

5) the lazy and flirtatious one who’d rather spent their days joking and taking it easy than handling their many responsibilities, who does care but shows it in ways unconventional.

just because their hair is grey instead of white doesn’t mean it’s not l&l’s iseul idreis, babes! i’d know that endlessly frustrating man anywhere! lovestruck’s app description for him reads: “The elven prince is beautiful and cunning with a silver tongue, but his lackadaisical lifestyle leaves much to be desired”. corporate wants you to find the difference between these two pictures they’re the same dot jpg.

6) the complicated and slender blonde who wields both blade AND magic, whose eyes glow, whose power is deemed dangerous, who wears shades of blue, AND is initially described as cold? who seems like she wants to beat the hell out of her compatriots, who she seems to lead, and whose outfit is needlessly complicated?

you think i don’t know a knock off helena klein when i see one???? ME???????? helena’s in-app description LITERALLY reads “cold as ice” and “wielding both sword and sorcery with ruthless precision”!!!!! of alllllllllll the things i’m most offended by this one motherfucker you can’t just fuck around with helena on a whim okay this shit is personal now!!!!!!

7) the creepy, predatory, and combative pale-but-tanned-but-murky-skinned dude who wears robes and a creepy beast mask.

l&l’s jinhai jubal i know it’s you!!!! actually this is probably the funniest thing of the whole situation to me bc this dev decided to remove not-alain as a love interest and seemingly replace him with not-jinhai. secondary poster you a hilarious bitch i’m not gonna lie.

(here’s jinhai in his mask lmfao)

8) the mouse-looking man who seems not as confident as not-helena and not-jinhai, wears full armor AND a double-sided sword strapped to his back.

none other than l&l’s alain richter, back from the dead! im gonna let the next image speak for itself.

still with me? i sure hope so bc it really gets juicy now!!!!! the similarities don’t end with the characters!!!! no, no, no!!!! the plot and progression of the demo are identical to that of l&l’s pilot episode, beat for beat.

in the l&l pilot episode, after the mc stumbles through the portal and into the medieval town, she’s almost immediately accosted by august, a rude mf who essentially acts not very knight-like despite his appearance and forces her into the nearby castle’s dungeon.

once inside the dungeon, the l&l mc is approached by a figure with hetero-chromatic eyes, who seems intrigued and confused by the mc’s lack of knowledge about the fantasy world.

once that person leaves, in comes a bubbly woman who seems to be floating. she asks mc if she’s ready to get out of the dungeon, and mc is like!!!! finally someone willing to help me. only..... uh oh.... she takes her to her lord instead of freeing her, wtf!!!!

once brought to the lord, who seems much more calm and reasonable than his high-strung and feisty knight, he listens to mc’s story and seems to believe her somewhat, but doesn’t want to risk his people.

(he’s even standing at the window LMFAOOOOOOOOO)

then the last remaining figure (iseul) playfully suggests that the lord (reiner) allow the mc to pick which among the group she’d like to guard her while they all determine whether or not she’s being truthful about not knowing anything. this is literally! literally! LITERALLY! how the PILOT EPISODE! of LOVE AND LEGENDS! ENDS!

ARE YOU SERIOUS LMFAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOO. going through all this is literally fucking HILARIOUS to me like ak;sdfjadsfkl;asdfjlasdf how BOLD and BRAVE do you have to be to so blatantly rip something off and then deny even ever encountering what you stole from adsfkjldfasdfkasd,f. i’m not even super mad bc like.... i torment voltage for funsies. but! LMAO!!!!!!!!

lastly..... as an added bonus to all of the juicy, juicy evidence above. l&l mc has a best friend in the “real”, modern world, who inexplicably has a lookalike in the fantasy world. well..... would you believe it if i told you that the nelroche has one just like it???

that’s right! even sophie and solaire made the plagiarism cut! gotta love those girlies, i’m so happy for them :)

the end!

[babyboy-bangtan]

The Moments In Between Chapter 2

As you become close friends with BTS, you begin to realize that the feelings you have for them are slowly turning into something you’re not ready to deal with. Unbeknownst to you, the same is happening to them.

✦ Pairing: Sub!BTS/Female Reader ✦ Word Count: 2K ✦ Rating: M ✦ Warnings: None. ✦ A/N: This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of my imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Dialogue spoken in Korean is bolded and italicized. Read on AO3 / Chapter 1

A Little Bit Closer

When Jungkook offered you to exchange numbers, you had no idea what was going to come next. You sincerely wanted to keep in touch with them because they really struck you as incredibly sweet people that would make amazing friends, so before you left them and maybe blew your chance to contact them again, you threw caution to the wind and told them what you wanted. Jungkook's reaction took you by surprise; his eagerness was both shocking and incredibly endearing. But what you truly hadn't expected was Jimin to text you before Jungkook could, and because he stole your number from him as well. He tried to deny it, but Jungkook confirmed it immediately once you asked him. He hadn't even realized Jimin had your number until you mentioned it.

God, Jimin— that little minx. That's truly the best word you can find to describe him. He's constantly walking the line between trying to push your buttons and then turning into the cutest person ever so you won't say anything to him, and you can't deny you are having a lot of fun texting with him. He keeps sending you selfies of his outfits and asking you if you think he looks pretty, to which you obviously can't reply anything other than yes, of course. He's beautiful no matter what he wears— they all are. Jimin feels like the spice to counteract Jungkook’s pure sweetness, and god knows that if it wasn't for the fact that you're just friends— and you barely know each other— you would have already bent him over your knee and taught him a lesson.

But, of course, you can't do that. So you have to settle for figuring out which buttons of his you can push yourself, which actually isn't really hard to do. He might have figured out himself that you basically melt every time he or Jungkook send you cute pictures or act cute when they video call you— no one can blame you for that, they are precious— but you also figured out that he tends to be all bark and no bite. He likes to flirt, but if you say something back he gets flustered immediately. Not to mention that if you compliment him when he's not expecting it he gets 10 times more embarrassed than normal.

You phone vibrates on your kitchen table while you pour yourself a cup of coffee, and when you see that it's Jimin and he sent you a selfie, you can't help but smile to yourself.

Speak of the devil.

       Hi noona, do you like it?

That word, noona, keeps making your stomach do a somersault every time you read it. Jungkook asked you early on if it was okay to call you 누나 and explained what it meant— even going so far as kindly writing it using the English alphabet so you wouldn't be confused. You said yes to him, but Jimin just started using it shortly after, without any warning or saying anything about it. You assumed he saw Jungkook using it and started using it himself, but you can't truly be sure. It's not like it matters, anyway, because you sure as hell don't mind to be called that. The idea of an honorific they use for older women is something that, for some reason, is really appealing to you. You don't want to sexualize a word that you know has no sexual connotations in their culture, but you can't help but be reminded of another word you've been called in the past— one you absolutely loved to be called.

But there's no point thinking about that know. You've been single for a while and you suspect you'll stay that way for the foreseeable future. You know how hard it is to find someone who's into the same things as you, and added to that it's almost impossible for you to trust someone and believe they're not using you or trying to gather information about you they can sell to whatever news outlet is willing to pay the highest price. You could try and date another actor, but your last relationship left quite a mark on you and you're not sure if you can believe that if you date an actor again he won't end up wanting the same thing your ex did— something you simply won't be able to give him.

So, for now all you can do is focus on yourself and your work, and hope that maybe one day you'll find a person whose desires and needs are compatible with your own.

Right now, though, you need to reply to Jimin.

He sent you a mirror selfie of himself in a simple dark suit with a white shirt— and as usual he looks like a damn work of art. Instead of replying, you find a mirror selfie you took of yourself yesterday, when you went to try the suit you're wearing for the premiere of your movie tomorrow.

       Hi Jimin, what do you think about mine?

It's a tight fitting one that you're wearing with high heels, and you have a shirt with the top button undone underneath it.

When he doesn't immediately reply, you laugh to yourself and start drinking your coffee, knowing very well that you are definitely going to be the winner this time.

"What about this one?"  Jimin asks Taehyung, who is sitting next to him on the floor with his chin on Jimin's shoulder to look at his phone better.

"The other one looks better."  He replies, using his own finger to go to the picture Jimin showed him before.

"Yeah, I think so too."  Jimin agrees, opening his conversation with you and sending it to you, along with a simple message.

       Hi noona, do you like it?

He knows he looks good— he's wearing his suit for the Billboard Awards— so now it's just a matter of waiting and seeing how you respond. He feels butterflies on his stomach at the thought of what your reply might be— but he doesn't have much time to think about it because you text him back quite fast.

Taehyung is right behind him still, waiting for your response expectantly as well.

"Wow." He says when Jimin opens your reply. "[Y/N]-Noona is so pretty."

Jesus Christ.

Instead of answering his question like he thought you would, you sent him a picture of yourself wearing a suit as well, and Jimin feels like he was just punched on the stomach.

Whenever he thinks about what his ideal woman is supposed to look like, the first image that comes into his mind is scarily similar to the one you just sent him.

"What are you going to reply?"  Taehyung asks, itching to know how the conversation will go. He knows Jimin, and he can already tell he got really flustered just now.

"I need water."  Jimin replies instead, leaving his phone on the floor and getting up so he can walk to the other side of the room to get a bottle.

Taehyung looks at the phone Jimin left on the ground, which is conveniently unlocked with your conversation still open.

He shouldn't do it— but he can't help himself.

He takes a picture of himself making a V with his fingers and smiling in the cutest way he manages— and then sends it to you.

       Hi noona. I'm Tae

Your response is fast.

      Hi Tae! 💙 Where did Jimin go?       He's drinking water       You are very pretty!       😂 thank you Tae, you are very pretty as well!       Thank you nooskhdsb

"What are you doing?"  Jimin suddenly asks, taking his phone back. "What did you say?"

"Nothing bad, she knows it was me."  Taehyung says, shrugging his shoulders.

      ??       Tae?       It's Jimin, sorry for that       Boo, I wanted to talk to him some more       And me? :(       You're okay too, I guess       Noona! 😭       I'm joking! 😂 You're so cute

Jimin gets really shy at that, and he struggles with knowing how to reply.

"You're not saying anything back?"  Taehyung asks, staring at Jimin whose face is bright pink.

"I don't know what to say."  He whines, dropping the phone on his lap and covering his cheeks with his hands to cool them.

"I'll reply."  Taehyung snatches the phone from him and takes another selfie, but this time he's smiling to the camera with one hand on his cheek and his eyes closed. He knows from Jimin that you like cute pictures, so he's doing his best to look as cute as he can.

       Hi noona, I'm back        Tae! I missed you!

"What did she say?" Jimin asks, moving to Taehyung's side to read what you texted him. "What? She never says that to me! Give me that."

       Noona, you never say you miss me :(        Jimin?       I'm getting whiplash from this conversation

"Namjoon-Hyung!"  Jimin yells to him, who is sitting down on the other end of the room, still eating after their dance practice.

"What?"  He yells back, not bothering to look up from his phone.

"Can you tell me what this means?"  He holds up his phone, and Namjoon looks up for a moment.

"Well, bring it here, I'm not going over there."  He says, taking another bite of his food.

Both he and Taehyung get up and walk up to him, and Namjoon leaves his own phone so he can see what Jimin is making a fuss about. Once he reads the messages, he can't help but snort.

"Ah, Hyung— don't laugh. Just tell me what she meant."

"I'm getting whiplash from this conversation? That?"  Jimin and Taehyung nod. "It means that it's kind of overwhelming that you're switching who texts her so often."  He gives back the phone and goes back to his own. "You should just text her from your phone instead."  He tells Taehyung with a shrug.

"Oh, I should."  He agrees, grabbing Jimin's phone and much like he did to Jungkook, he saves your number for himself.

He then gives it back to Jimin, who wastes no time in sending you a selfie of him pouting and looking very, very sad.

      Say you miss me too noona 😭       You're right here 😂       :(

Taehyung is busy filming a video of himself saying annyeong over and over again while doing different cute poses with Jungkook— who apparently joined him while Jimin was distracted— hugging him from behind, and he can't help but wonder about the way you talk to them both and the way to talk to him.

He has read some of your conversations with Jungkook so he knows you're constantly praising him and are incredibly sweet to him, and it seems like that is going to be the case with Taehyung as well. But when it comes to him you're different, which is not to say that you're not also sweet to him— you praise him and compliment him a lot as well— but you add a little bit more teasing to the sweetness. Well, quite a bit more. He can't deny he enjoys provoking you, but he really wishes he knew what's on your mind when you see what he sends you, and if maybe your thoughts when you read his messages are similar to his own.

Stop.

It's pointless to think about that.

       To answer to your first question: that suit looks amazing on you.

"Ah, damn it."  He mumbles to himself, feeling his heart hammering on his chest. It's dangerous that you can cause this kind of reactions on him.

       Thank you noona 💕 You too

He can't write much more because he doesn't know what else to say— he might make a fool of himself if he tries too hard to come up with a better reply.

If you can do this to him through text only, Jimin isn't sure about what you'll be able to create in him when they finally see you again. But both sadly and luckily, it seems like that won't be happening any time soon.

Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed and stay safe!

[bookandcover]

A couple years ago, Michelle Obama’s book was recommended to me with glowing praise by a college friend (who reads a lot of the memoir/autobiography genre, and who felt this book stood out). I’ve meant to read it since then, and I was really glad to sit down with it as the March choice for our family’s Anti-Racism Book Club. Michelle Obama has a real nice writing style: direct, specific, and authentic. It maybe sounds unfair to say that I was “pleasantly surprised” by how strong the writing was; this was not because of Michelle herself, but because of the “memoirs by non-writer celebrities” genre where I have generally had low expectations when it comes to literary style and book structure. I really enjoyed the way Michelle writes, though. Her descriptions are specific and vivid. I felt, during the first half of the book, like I was reading a novel. I kept forgetting this energetic and self-aware girl was Michelle Obama. She seemed like a relatable, realistic protagonist in a YA book, growing up in her sharply-observed Chicago neighborhood. Her family stories and her friendships felt so concrete and were so easy to picture through the descriptions and imagery. The narrative always felt natural, well-paced, and engaging.

As Michelle’s narration arrived at the point in time when she appeared more frequently in the public eye, I was able to reconcile her vividly drawn youth with the things I knew about Michelle and the Obamas separate from this book. The blending of both selves/personas was really effective, as Michelle filled in public image outlines with color and heart by sharing the details of life in the White House. Michelle humanizes the places she lives, and her observations of the White House, its traditions and conventions both upheld and pushed against in meaningful ways by the Obama family, made their lives possible for me to imagine. From Michelle’s appreciation of being able to get her own mug from a cabinet without being offered help in her post-Presidency life to her insistence that her daughters make their own beds in the White House, the concreteness of their lives is always present in these pages. I loved getting such personal insights into a part of American public life that we are all aware of (there’s a First Family, there’s a White House), but that normally transcends the practical and specific in our minds.  

I felt, through Michelle’s well-chosen descriptions, the challenging burden of the security that surrounded their family at all times during these years. This was poignantly captured in the scene where Michelle and Barack plan a trip to NYC for dinner and play, only to understand how many people they’ve inconvenience through this small trip, as Manhattan streets are barricaded by their security and Secret Service agents scan and check everyone entering the restaurant after them. Sometimes the smallest details capture the feeling of life in the White House most vividly. I was struck by Michelle’s explanation that she couldn’t step out on the Truman Balcony—the only semi-private outdoor space at the White House—without first alerting the security who would clear the area below the South Lawn of the White House where tourists stopped for photos. Therefore, she knew she’d never use it. Just like going out to dinner and a show in NYC, simple things created such a huge operation and hassle for those around them, that it felt natural and necessary to stop doing them. I thought it was interesting to see that, despite these challenges, the area where the Obamas weren’t willing to limit and to hold back was in the experiences of their children. Michelle was frustrated with the security process when a changed young people’s plan—heading to get ice cream spontaneously—was thwarted for Malia while she waited for an hour for her head of security to arrive from the suburbs. Michelle told the security planners and organizers, “if you’re going to protect a kid, you’ve got to be able to move like a kid,” and the appropriate adjustments were made. Michelle prioritized her children’s rich experiences throughout their years in the White House, taking them to Washington D.C. museums, and skiing at Liberty Mountain, and along on international trips.

This emphasis on the vividness and diversity of her children’s experiences seemed to echo Michelle’s own upbringing, although she didn’t explicitly draw this connection. While, at times, Michelle was frustrated by aspects of her upbringing—embarrassed that her mother hand-sewed her clothes while other teenagers sported trendy outfits, or angry at her equally stubborn great-aunt Robbie over her piano lessons, when Michelle wanted to quickly skip to more advanced pieces rather than grinding over the basics—she overwhelmingly feels the love and care that surrounds her every day. She explains her father’s fortitude and strength; living with multiple sclerosis for decades, he continued to maintain his quality work and support his family, never wanting to focus on his pain or his physical deterioration. Michelle tells a heartbreaking story about a day when her father was too overwhelmed by pain to make it from their house to his car to drive to work and sank down on the doorstep, while Michelle watched him surreptitiously. She decided to give him a few minutes and then offer help, but when she looked back outside he had made it to his truck and gone to work for the whole day.

Michelle also gives huge credit for her positive upbringing and her educational successes to her mother’s care, tracing the impact this had on her education and career trajectory. She explains how when her mother understood that Michelle’s second grade classroom was not a productive environment, with a teacher who did not challenge the students nor show them care, she went to the school to advocate for an advanced placement program that allowed Michelle and other high-performing students to benefit from a more self-directed learning environment, a high-quality teacher, and new schoolwork and projects. Michelle knows that having someone watching over her education, and advocating for her before she could do this for herself, made all the difference. She also speaks about her mother’s creativity and the ways she made Michelle and her older brother Craig’s childhoods rich with experiences. Michelle recalls that she made a chimney and fireplace from painted cardboard one year for Christmas and describes her mother upholding New Year’s Eve traditions filled with board games and specially-prepared food.

The richness of Michelle’s upbringing with her family and community’s warmth, care, and love, in a space that would be stereotypically discounted as poor and getting poorer, reminded me a lot of my own childhood. I grew up in a poor neighborhood in increasingly socio-economically stratified Seattle in the 90’s, but never once felt like I was missing anything with two parents who spent quality time with me every single day. Michelle’s extended family forms a vibrant and lively community in her South Side of Chicago neighborhood, forming a support structure that seems to never leave Michelle wanting for anything, perceiving herself to be loved and valued and encouraged, building her the most solid of life foundations. Even when her parents had so little, they saved and borrowed to send Michelle on a trip with her classmates to Paris because they wanted her to experience the world. Even though Michelle raises her children in a very different socio-economic context, it’s clear that the exact same values guide her and Barack’s parenting. I think Michelle and Barack’s efforts to prioritize their family and their daughters’ upbringing is something that was visible about them during their time in the White House. This focus shone through and their love for each other always seemed so genuine. It was lovely to see that contextualized in Becoming.

More than just Michelle’s upbringing was relatable to me. I found her experiences when she attended Princeton, vaulting suddenly into a different environment than what she’d known, an environment steeped in the specific traditions of an old New England college, to be likewise relatable (yes, what is squash? I’d thought this was just a nickname for the sport, and laughed loudly the first several times I heard it as an incoming freshman). The socio-economic context shift from childhood to college that Michelle experienced was quite similar to my own. Her experiences in her 20s, too, of trying to figure out who she wants to be in a career/work space and how to let go of the “trappings of success” instilled in her by her high-powered education also rang very true for me. Even her love of eating out at the same haunt, her engagement with pop culture, her routine listening to music, her interest in leveraging fashion for social justice impact—these small things were similar to my experiences and preferences, and they made Michelle someone I really wanted to connect with and befriend. I felt these connections within the knowledge that every single experiences of Michelle’s has occurred within the context of race. Even though I felt I related to many of her experiences and thoughts, I can never understand how all of these were shaped by the systematic racism that permeates all facets of life in America. Yet, I think Michelle wants her story to be accessible, relatable not necessarily in similarity but in shared humanity. In connecting with her and identifying with her, many people can find inspiration and encouragement through her journey, as she herself acknowledges. And while I know that the people in America who most need to see this and believe in it—a Black woman from the South Side of Chicago having the experiences and achievements that Michelle has had—I think her empowerment has a broad resonance that inspires striving from within every kind of under-representation, a vote of confidence for every kind of diversity.

Right at the end of the book, Michelle beautifully articulates her faith in change, hope, and this kind of common humanity. As she describes Lin-Manuel Miranda’s musical Hamilton, she writes “it told a story about America that allowed the diversity in.” This description made me cry because it is full of hope. America has a long way to go in terms of achieving racial equality. I thought it was interesting to see how heavily Michelle was criticized during the first campaign when her statement “for the first time in my adult life, I am really proud of my country” (followed by “because it feels like hope is making a comeback”) was taken out of context. I think that, today, in the political climate of 2020 that continues into 2021, a lot more direct criticism of America is accepted. Today, there seems to be a much stronger understanding that BIPOC speaking up about race and staying they have never been safe, have never been equal, have never been happy in America is our reality. This language isn’t something that is dismissed or attacked in the same way it was in 2008/2009. Sure, the standards of “accepted language” are probably always different for someone running for political office (although has our recent former President all but obliterated such standards?), but I think there’s a much wider percentage of the American population today who feels that strong criticism of America on the grounds of race is appropriate, and necessary. Setting aside the context of Michelle’s rise to public visibility, I think she independently has incredible hope (not manufactured, not over-done, but realistic, enduring) in America. She ties this hope to the connections she felt when she campaigned in Iowa and didn’t see the working white class voters there as vastly different from herself and her upbringing. She ties this hope to the young people who devoted their lives and time and energy to Obama’s campaign. On her Becoming book tour (I watched the documentary on Netflix this week), she ties this hope to the young women of color who she connects with who are fighting for their education and their opportunities. She ties this hope to her own daughters, growing up strong and independently-minded.

In the final pages of this book, as the next President casts an appalling shadow over the things Michelle and Barack fought for, Michelle chooses to look to the musical Hamilton, as one concrete example of the hope she feels, in spite of setbacks, in spite of the slowness of change. Michelle leaves the White House mentally reviewing for herself the impacts that they had during their time there, the positive changes that they made, from the tiny things to the giant things, and her ability to look at the world this way—while showing how much this is not an easy thing to do, nor a perspective to take for granted—is one of the powerful impacts and truths of this book.

[aion-rsa]

Why The Truth About Britney Spears Is So Elusive

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

Britney Spears is one of the most-covered and least-known celebrities of the modern era. She is a millennial icon whose songs were the soundtrack of a generation. A choreographed contradiction from her earliest burst onto pop stardom, the singer became a blank canvass for anyone carrying a paint brush. The FX docuseries The New York Times Presents “Framing Britney Spears” is an attempt to find the artist’s place in the gallery. It is also searching for Britney’s whereabouts in general. Spears was placed into a conservatorship when she was 26 years old. That was 13 years ago this month, and she has been petitioning the court to have that changed.

Britney’s conservatorship, overseen by her father Jamie Spears, has been profitable. With a net worth of over $60 million, maybe too profitable to ever get resolved. It could be a form of life imprisonment and wannabe jailers appear to come out of the woodwork regularly in Britney’s career. Spears also currently has a restraining order against Sam Lutfi, one of her former managers.

According to “Framing Britney Spears,” court documents call the singer a “high-functioning conservatee.” Britney’s fans point out their favorite star released four albums, went on three world tours, performed a sold-out five-year residency in Las Vegas, was paid $15 million to be a judge on The X Factor, and put her name on a billion-dollar perfume line. Yet, she has been deemed incapable of taking care of her finances or life, and even when she can drive.The case is being proceeded over by Los Angeles Superior Court Judge Brenda Penny.

For a pop queen in exile, Spears hasn’t been invisible. She’s been spotted at Starbucks with her boyfriend, Sam Asghari. She’s posted clips of her dancing, working out, painting, and giving impromptu fashion shows on Instagram during the coronavirus lockdown. Her posts, of course, only fuel the fire of conspiracy theorists, regardless of their apparent mood or meaning. Spears’ song titles like “Work Bitch,” “I’m a Slave 4 U,” and “”Out from Under,” could also be read as messages concerning her career. 

Spears commands loyalty, and her fans love her. This is poignantly evident in Chris Crocker’s viral 2007 YouTube plea to “Leave Britney Alone.” The #FreeBritney movement rose up spontaneously after the conservatorship. The fan-produced podcast “Britney’s Gram” has dedicated itself to getting information to the public. Miley Cyrus shouted “Free Britney” during a performance. Paris Hilton and Rose McGowan have shown support. Britney’s mother Lynne Spears has been known to “like” comments with the #FreeBritney hashtag. 

Samantha Stark, the director of The New York Times Presents: Framing Britney Spears, freelanced as a choreographer while making the two-step into video journalism. Writing at The New York Times for the past 8 years, she also produced and directed episodes of The Weekly. Stark spoke with Den of Geek about the difficulties of reporting on Spears’ conservatorship, and the future of journalism in a changing media climate.

Den of Geek: What drew you to Britney, of all the cases?

Samantha Stark: We started filming this before a lot of these court filings about the conservatorship started happening. The original concept was to look back at media coverage of her through this 2020-then-lens, post-MeToo and post when things like talking about mental health are more mainstream. There’s not as much stigma. Looking back at the media coverage of her from the early 2000s feels so shocking now. That was the original concept. Then while we were filming, these court filings started pouring in.

Could you have picked two better names for this case than Wallet and Judge Penny?

Right? There are a lot of similar names that run throughout it. You have Jamie Spears and Lynn Spears and Jamie Lynn Spears. You have a lot of Kevins, just like a ton of Kevins running throughout. There are a lot of Sams also in Britney’s story. There are a lot of re-occurring names. But yeah, Andrew Wallet.

What’s the first misconception “Framing Britney Spears” will clarify for the casual Britney Spears fan?

A huge misperception of her, that I had going into the project, is a lot of people think that the creation of her image and the music that she does and the way her shows are and the outfits she wears are other people’s decisions. But what I learned over and over again was how much of a say in her early career, including “Baby One More Time” at the very beginning, she had in her image and the way she was presented. How involved she was creatively in every show she did and every music video she made, particularly at the beginning of her career. I think a lot of people think she’s this puppet that was sexualized as a teenager and didn’t know it. And I think, from talking to the people who worked with her then, that that was her. She had a really big say in that.

From my unscientific survey, asking everyone I came into contact with “what’s the first thing they think of when they think of Britney Spears”: A lot of people say, “Oh, that time she shaved her head,” or “the picture where she shaved her head.” One of the reasons it’s called “Framing Britney Spears” is there seems to be these very few still-image frames in our collective subconscious, that burned into us when we remember her.

We went into it wanting to figure out how we could learn what was behind the frame, outside of the frame. I think a lot of people don’t realize all the different factors that were leading up to that point. A lot of people don’t realize that she was going through a custody battle then and how important her role as a mother was to her, or is to her still. There’s a lot of pulling back the curtain we could do.

Danny Ramos, the photographer we interviewed, was one of the only people doing video during the big paparazzi explosion. We wanted to talk to him and use his video, so you could see what was happening outside of the frame. He describes the time with the umbrella, that’s another big photo that people remember, like the head shaving. What people don’t realize is how upset she was that day because she was trying to see her kids and wasn’t able to. And how much he pushed her buttons before that happened, some deep buttons. So that’s outside of the frame. 

Another one is the central mystery of our film. I think a lot of people don’t know that Britney Spears is still in a court-sanctioned conservatorship and that, for most of the 12 years, her father was the one in charge of her personal, medical, and economic decisions. He controls what happens with her money. The central mystery of our piece is something that Joe Coscarelli, one of our reporters, says in the film: “She’s living the life of a busy pop star, and yet we’re told she’s at risk constantly.” How is someone who can live the life of a busy pop star also be so at risk that she can’t make basic decisions for herself like medical-care decisions, where she lives, contracts, what to do with her money?

Britney’s lawyer, Adam Streisand, mentions a health report he wasn’t allowed to see, and was told by the judge it was justified withholding. I’ve seen a lot of reported diagnoses on the internet. Do you have any idea what that report said specifically?

Absolutely not. I think that’s important. Part of the difficulty with reporting on conservatorships, Britney’s and also any conservatorship, is that a lot of it has to do with medical records. Also, they do have court investigators that go out and interview the people involved. They have different kinds of people who submit reports about the person, and they’re protected under HIPAA and also allow the person some privacy.

Britney has signaled recently through her court filings that she doesn’t want her records to be sealed, that she wants people to be able to see them. But that’s particularly with her estate, which is different from the medical records. Who knows if she would want people to see that report also? But her conservators and lawyers in the past have decided it’s against her best interest. That’s something else interesting about conservatorships, is that other people decide what is in the person’s best interest. As Britney is performing in Vegas, other people are deciding for her what’s in her best interest all the time.

Since we don’t know anything about that report, we don’t know if Britney has a mental health diagnosis. She could not, there could be nothing actually in that realm. A lot of people like to speculate what kind of mental illness she might have, but we don’t know if she even has one. I think that’s important to remember.

Britney’s request for an outside independent party taking conservatorship seems like the most rational solution to the situation. Why is this so difficult?

That is the question. It seems as if Britney requests, “I don’t want my father in charge of being a conservator of the estate. I want this trust, Bessemer Trust, instead.” Yet her father is still in charge. That is legal. The judge made that decision. We don’t know why. A lot of questions about the conservatorship system, as a whole, have been brought up during this process. When someone is under a conservatorship, they are under a conservatorship because it’s considered that they cannot act in their own best interest. Conservatorships are mostly given to the elderly with Alzheimer’s, because a lot of people try to take advantage of people with Alzheimer’s and get them to sign over their money or their wills. And this was put in place to protect those people, which is really necessary.

It’s confusing because Britney is not. It’s a very unique situation, they always say, but we don’t know why.Jamie’s argument is that he has been doing a good job on this for the past 12 years. Her estate has grown, and that if he gets taken off and a whole new company takes over, it can harm her. Bessemer Trust does this professionally. They manage people with gigantic estates’ money all the time. So, the merits of that argument are questionable. But the judge decided that way. She’d left the door open. She didn’t decide he’s definitely staying on. She didn’t do an emergency suspension. That’s what they were asking for. They could still file to remove him.

These legal processes take a really long time, and as they’re happening, everybody’s getting paid. Britney’s estate pays the lawyers on both sides. She pays for her own lawyers, and then she pays for the lawyers arguing against her own lawyers, as well as the conservators’. That is oftentimes what happens with the conservatorship system. That’s also a place where people point to as something that could be a systemic issue in conservatorship systems: are these lawyers always acting in her best interest while also getting paid as long as the conservatorship is in place?

Is Britney a hostage, or is this a self-imposed exile?

I have no idea. We don’t know. Another really hard part of reporting this is there’s such a strong circle around Britney, seemingly controlling who she interacts with, because of the conservatorship, that we can’t talk to her. And she has not said anything publicly on her social media. Through her court documents, she said she appreciates the long “informed support” of her fans and that she “doesn’t want this battle hidden away like a family secret.”

Those were quotes from her court documents written by her lawyer, Sam Ingham, who legally is responsible for speaking for her since she’s not legally necessarily supposed to speak for herself. She could. So, that’s a mystery. Why isn’t she saying anything? Is it because there are people around her stopping her, or is it because she doesn’t want to say anything? Maybe Britney doesn’t want to talk to anyone about this. We have no idea. It makes it very frustrating to report on.

Just because you report on something doesn’t mean you agree with it. Do you think Spears speaks in code on her Instagram posts?

I don’t know. I have looked at every post since 2015 and some before that. It’s really fascinating to look at. Something about her Instagram that I love was this period of time where she was posting a lot of herself with her kids. It was just so beautiful to see her as a mom, because I know from talking to people close to her, that’s the number-one thing she’s ever wanted, to be a mom and to be seen as a mom. So those are really moving to me. Whether or not she’s speaking in code with other things, it’s so hard to tell because they’re always so surprising what she puts up there.

It seems she’s been doing it consistently, even in her songs throughout her career.

Yeah. It is interesting to listen to some of her songs now that we’ve seen all this come out in court. Even the song “Overprotected.” Listening to that now, wow. It has such a different meaning knowing that she does not want her father to be “protecting” her. A lot of her music videos and music has this bondage theme. Britney is often seen in chains or in cages. Also, a lot of themes of people taking from her, like “Gimme More.”

I think people haven’t taken that seriously, but when you look at it and you think of these as art and expression, even if she doesn’t have a song-writing credit on the songs a lot. Felicia [Culotta], her assistant and friend, who’s been with her for most of her career, said she would go into the studio and talk to the people who were writing the songs about what was happening in her life. And they would often write songs based off of what she was saying, which I guess is standard in the industry. I didn’t know. But we can draw our own conclusions to why there is such a big theme, yeah, of bondage and of people taking stuff from her.

Britney was a trendsetter musically. She explored dubstep, and she really is the face of the millennials. Do you think the #FreeBritney movement will also become a millennial icon?

Well, one of the things I find so compelling about the #FreeBritney movement is talking to Kim Kaiman, who was the marketing director at Jive Records. She was the person who met Britney when she first came in at 15, and decided how to market her, what her image was going to be. She very much expressed that she wanted it to be based off of who Britney actually was as a person. She describes her as “your friend that you kind of idolize a bit and look up to, but is the same as you, has the same hopes and dreams as you have.” And the 12, 13-year-old preteen age was who they were marketing her towards, I think she really connected with that.

Kim says she captured so well the dichotomy of what a teenage girl is. Teenage girls want to be grown women, but they’re also kids. It’s this wanting to be sexy and in control feeling that she captured that really spoke to these young people. Almost everyone in #FreeBritney who I talked to was in their late 20s or early 30s. So they were that age then. They were those kids that she was being sold to. I feel like the idea that she’s your friend really carried over, because they’re like, “This is my friend that they’re doing this to. I have to go stop it,” from what they said to me.

When they were that age, she was sold as this perfect, all-American girl. Kevin Wu, who’s one of the #FreeBritney organizers, says this in the film. He was saying finding out that she wasn’t perfect, that time where she was super vulnerable to people, and she was having public issues. I hate saying meltdown because I really don’t know what it was. But the vulnerability that she showed there really, really speaks to this group, and also, I would say, that age bracket in general.

I keep quoting people, but Felicia, it’s not in the film, said “Britney was judged and criticized for who she was. Even when she came out as a teenager, she was judged and criticized for being too sexy. A lot of people who are kind of these outsiders or people who were bullied or LGBTQ people, they were judged and criticized for who they were when they were younger, and so there’s this connection. They can relate to each other.” She said, “Britney relates to them as well.”

There’s kind of this counterculture fandom that the #FreeBritney people are like the people who were bullied when they were younger. And it is kind of millennial. We want to be more open talking about mental health. We don’t want bullying. We want diversity. I do think that it really speaks to that.

You worked extensively with the #FreeBritney movement players. In the review, I wrote you treated them like stringers. How do you rate them as journalists?

I would not say that we treated them like stringers because we did all our own reporting ourselves. We have our own journalists. Liz Day, who’s featured in the piece. Everything that they were finding out and bringing up we independently investigated and verified, absolutely. But I will say, I think they became their own investigators for themselves. There weren’t people doing investigations into it when they first started in 2019. And so, they definitely became their own investigators trying to dig up court documents. But we definitely did that ourselves.

But part of the story is that they became these investigators, so we do feature that in the story. It’s fascinating. Some lawyers are involved with #FreeBritney, and they know how to find the publicly available court documents. They would take them and put them online and highlight them. And as soon as a new court document would come out, like if Sam Ingham, Britney’s court-appointed attorney, would file something new, they would know immediately and post it online and dissect it. But we did that ourselves too.

It’s so much easier for us to do it because we have a full infrastructure set up for it. These people were spending so much time. The reason they started doing the investigating is because there wasn’t any media covering it, and they really wanted that. They wanted people to look into this. And so, they started doing it themselves, and it got a lot of attention. Then the media did look into it.

We had an investigation into her conservatorship in 2016, so we were one of the only people to be looking at it in that way. It was by the reporter who’s in the film, Joe Coscarelli. They did this “Is Britney Spears Ready to Stand on Her Own” questioning: is she ready to not be in this conservatorship? A lot of people are interested in it because of what they started digging up.

I see it similar to the hijacking of right-wing hashtags by the K-pop stans or what’s happening right now with the GameStop stock. The community is bringing the attention and journalism is keeping up with it.

The fact also that the age of a lot of these people means they’re so adept at internet culture and social media culture. They are using social media in a sophisticated way to get people to pay attention to them, for sure.

Do you think Britney had any idea how creepy the Star Search Q&A with Ed McMahon was, or was she just blindsided by the stupidity of it?

I think you can look at her face and be the judge of that. She was 10, but she handled it very well. I think it boded for the future of men asking inappropriate things to her. She just kind of like, “It depends. Boys are mean. It depends.” She kind of shook it off quite well as a ten-year-old.

And you see her in our piece later, when there are men asking her inappropriate questions, she sidesteps it in a really good way, in a really way that’s interesting to watch.

The shocking one was her being told about a mother saying that she wanted to shoot her because she was a bad influence.

The wife of a governor, by the way. That’s the kind of thing that you look at and you wonder would it happen now? I think we’ve come some way of not trying to shame people for their sexuality, but who knows?

There’ve always been persistent dark rumors about Britney, along with other celebrities who reach a certain tier. Why do you think people are so eager to demonize them?

Well, I wonder if that is still true today. I feel like it was very true during this height of the tabloid era, like 2004 to 2009. We’re not as eager to enjoy celebrities’ crashing and burning. If they’re going to rise, they have to fall, that kind of narrative. I feel like our culture is not as into that now. I think we’re less mean-spirited. And I don’t know. That’s what I was trying to figure out this entire time making this piece. Like, why? Why Britney? Why are we, as a culture, consuming all of this?

The reason that there was paparazzi around her all the time is because it sold. We consume that. It sold the magazines better than any other light “storylines.” I don’t know why. I mean, just my opinion, maybe the idea of what could be beautiful in society and perfect in society was so narrow that people were resentful of that. The majority of the US Weekly readers were women, so the majority of people buying those photographs were women. Is it because this ideal was so narrow back then that people became jealous and resentful of her? Now, I think the standard of beauty has opened up much wider, but that’s just my guess.

One of the experts says she’s never seen anyone successfully terminate a conservatorship. If Britney does succeed, will that upset the guardianship designation in the future?

Only time will tell. Who knows? I mean, if there are issues within the system that need to come to light, I think it would help them come to light.

Just because we’re Den of Geek and you’re from The New York Times, I have to ask, are you at all related to Tony Stark?

You know, I get that question a lot, and the true answer is we don’t know.

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The New York Times Presents “Framing Britney Spears” debuts Feb. 5 on FX and FX on Hulu.

The post Why The Truth About Britney Spears Is So Elusive appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[nightshadedawn]

Persona 6 Concept Part 6

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When does an idea stop being someone else’s, and start becoming your own? It’s a question I’ve been pondering since perhaps Part 2 or three.

Guess what I did? That’s right, I got more pictures for ya! And it’s, like, a lot. I have some ideas for the outfits for the character, but I’m seriously no stylist, so they all look kind lame. I’d love some input on how you thought they turned out! Now, let’s get into it!

MC Personalities

Before we get started, there’s something I have to explain to you.

The idea with any Persona MC is that the player creates their personality, so you don’t want too much of a personality to show through their outfits (hence why they wear the standard uniform while most of the other have differences to them). But the thing is, each MC already has a little bit of a personality by what kind of answers you can give. Joker is shown to be confident and cocky more often than not, P3’s male protag was solemn and closed off, and I hear the female MC was rather bubbly. Sadly, I was too young to play those kinds of game back when I would have actually owned a system to play any version of P3 on, so I only know the game of P5, the anime of P4, and the manga of P3, so I can’t say for certain if this is accurate.

However! I’ve had this thought in mind of having the MCs have the barebones of personalities. Obviously having them have the same personality is just rehashing the same character with a different model, so that idea went right out the window. But in light of the bad reception I’ve heard for the female MC of P3, I didn’t want to give you a pushover female MC. Not to say the male MC is a pushover, but, well…

Let’s start with the Female MC. She’s pretty, a senior, and in the provided picture from the original video, she wears those bright red, eye catching shoes. Just from this short description, I could say her personality shows up as being confident as the center of attention, even seeking it. She’s pretty and she knows it, might even flaunt it. Words I would use to describe her; confident, strong willed, hot-headed, intimidating, solid, dominant, reluctantly cares, bitter and jaded (her reaction towards the world after her mother’s death). Her dialogue options will likely be bitter, bored, sarcastic, or downright mean (up until further into the story as she starts getting closer to her teammates, you know, natural character growth).

Then there’s the Male MC. Belatedly, I realized that the picture I found was Italy from Hetalia and the cats are the Cat Countries, but the image really goes for what I’m looking for with him. Keeping Italy out of the picture (well, his direct personality, at least), we can still get a semblance of an idea about Male MC’s character. Shy, closed off, doesn’t interact well with humans. He’s anything but an open book, and I imagine that he’d used teasing/humourous dialogue, as if he was trying to play off that he’s fine. Words I would use to describe him: timid, teasing, awkward, thoughtful, calm, level-headed, submissive, delicate, quiet and sad (his reaction to his mother’s death). His dialogue options will likely consist of playful teasing, awkwardness, dodgy answers, and left field responses.

They’re not exact opposite, both are pretty closed off, but for different reasons. When you have a female main character in animes in comparison to male main characters, the girl is usually someone weak, timid, a pushover. Their ‘strength’ is their ability to get other to open up. She’s an open book, and even if she doesn’t always start off that way, she ends up a big softie. I wanted something different for this MC. She’s pained over her mother’s death, but she doesn’t outwardly cry like other female anime characters would. She holds it in, until it festers and grows and stops making her sad, but instead makes her angry.

…A very male anime character thing to do, no?

And that was my intent.

The Male MC also shows some traits that normally would show up in female anime character, notably his way of keeping things to himself to not worry his friends. I’m aware that male anime characters do the same, but they have different ways of doing it. Though impossible/implausible it may seem, I would like to break barriers with the personalities these characters have. 

Keep in mind, I’m going off the beginning of the plot, when they first come to the small town it takes place in. As the story goes on, they’ll grow as people and characters and grow beyond their bitterness, beyond their lack of confidence. She will not become timid, but become stronger. He will not stop being timid and awkward, but be able to go on despite it. That’s my vision for their characters. 

Well, that kinda went longer than I meant it to, and I hope it wasn’t too confusing. The entire idea of these characters was “What are some male/female anime traits that I can use and make them still appear femmenine/masculine?” Anyway, I just wanted you to have this in mind when we get to the pictures, because they’re the personalities I had in mind when creating their outfits.

Outfits

Female MC

I wanted to give her a classy, city girl look, as she’s new from the city and grew up there. She’s not into this backwater stuff yet. Black and white is a big theme for both MCs, hence why their outfits will be mostly black and white. But green should be incorporated, so I added the green button up. Either shirt could be used individually, but my plan had been to have the green shirt, open, over white. The snake twisting around the staff is a classic Greek symbol of healing, as is the theme of this game, and is worn as a necklace by the female MC.

Though those loafers most anime protagonists seem to wear would be more probable for this character, I went with boots as loafers are not ideal for going around forests or jungles in. 

I just went on about how loafers aren’t ideal for walking around in forests, but then I give her heels. But do you see that picture? She’s got heels. I wanted to honor that a little bit, hence, heels. I couldn’t decide if I wanted the red heels, to honor her original image, or if I liked the green to stay in theme with the rest of the game. The key chain is there to give the connection to P5 and the hint at maybe she was in Tokyo when the Phantom Thieves were at large, and probably supported them. (If we go canonically by year released, she would have been in middle school at that time, I think?) I liked the shirt that’s paired with the shorts, but the coloring of the other one was better. And after some thought, I liked the idea of a baggy shirt on the MC, even if it wouldn’t be very good for her in-game. Too much fabric moving around while she’s fighting would just get tangled up around her.

As before with the boots, I wanted it to be practical. As for the shirts, I couldn’t decide on one, though I lean more towards the light colored one. This was the most difficult outfit to design by far, at least for this character.

Male MC

Because of The cats in the picture, I couldn’t resist giving him some clothing with cats on them. Hence the shirt saying ‘Real men love cats’ and the cat on the back of the jean jacket. He’s also supposed to sport a classy city look, though more toned down than his counterpart’s, much like his personality is. I couldn’t decide between the trench coat and jean jacket, because I think both would serve their purpose. The snake bracelet is supposed to be reminiscent of the one on Hermes’ staff, another symbol of healing. 

This guy gets to deal with looking plain and wearing loafers. I couldn’t find any boots I really liked for him, and he doesn’t exactly seem like the kind of guy who’d wear boots to begin with. Too airheaded to think about practicality and going into the forest. The vest might be gotten rid of on the male uniforms in favor of one that buttons, giving the boys more diversity to their outfits. 

Here we see more green incorporated, and red converse to mirror the Female MC’s red heels if those are the ones chosen. (If I’m being perfectly honest, I hate the pairing of red and green for anything other than Christmas, but this does not bother me) As you can see, this MC also supported the Phantom Thieves by having their logo on his shoes. The choker’s there because… I honestly just liked the idea of guys wearing chokers? Kind of in tune and contradictory to his personality at the same time. (Fuck you to all those who say only girls wear necklaces)

I’ma be perfectly honest right now, I’m not sure about keeping the tie on the guys at all, let alone the summer uniform. And I have problems designing outfits for men in general. So, it might be tossed. The pants, for both summer and winter uniforms, will be the pattern of that little box right by them. I just couldn’t find a pair in that pattern, so woops.

Sayaka Ito

Sayaka also comes from the big city. However, the ‘classy city girl’ look isn’t really something she’s embrace. ‘Essentic city girl’ is more her speed. The swirly black symbol is another symbol of healing, and will either go on her guitar or hat. In the other world, the guitar will be replaced by whatever axe she has equipped. This is the only outfit in which she wears the hoodie properly.

Though the hoodie remains, she wears it tied around her waist in this outfit. And even if she doesn’t have the guitar with her uniform, the axe is still present in the other world. Rolls her sleeves to her elbows. Actually, I’m pretty sure she’d ditch the sweater too.

On top of being a little eccentric, Sayaka can be impractical, hence the sandals and skirts. Neither are good for battle, though both are cute. The black skirt shoes both the front and back of it. The hoodie gets tied around her waist. The first shirt is a crop top, while the other is full length.

As all the others aside from the winter weekend, Sayaka wears the hoodie tied around her waist in this outfit. She would wear the top button undone with the light colored shirt, and possibly have it untucked. 

Yudai Shinoda

I haven’t really a lot to say about this. The symbol (you guessed it; another symbol of healing) would either be on his bracelet or on the shirt. I think on the shirt to give it a bit of umph. The yellow laces would be on the boots, obviously. Who doesn’t like yellow laces?

I really picture this guy trying to keep up the image of a model student and wearing the uniform properly. Possibly has the sleeves rolled up to his elbows? 

I couldn’t quite decide which shirt I liked, because they all kinda fit my image of him. He’s really the kind of chill person that would wear graphic/band t-shirts. 

Nothing really interesting here.

Miyako Fujimori

I don’t know why, but I decided that Miyako likes octopi, hence the necklace. The onyx on the necklace is a symbol of healing, so it works with that theme too. As you can see, I couldn’t decide on a skirt or sweater. The turtle neck shirt is always worn, but I couldn’t decide on which sweater.

The one who wears the uniform most properly aside from the female MC. I haven’t much to say on the matter.

The only short sleeves she’ll wear! Whichever skirt wasn’t chosen for her winter will be worn here. 

Not much to say on the matter of this outfit. She does wear the long sleeved shirt in the summer for personal reasons that go alone with her depression. Considering she almost commits suicide on screen, I don’t know if I’d say she self-harmed and has scars from it, but I know, as someone who has depression, some days I just wear long sleeves because it makes me feel like it’s easier to hide.

Masahiko Oshiro

I think his symbol of healing will likely either be a pattern on his tie or a tie clip. The colored lines at the bottom are supposed to be the hair clips you see in animes, like those criss-cross designs in hair. He’s an asshole, but I wanted him to appear as a cute asshole. The pink jacket can go with any of the shirts (white, purple, or pink), but the white will either go with the purple or pink. The purple is mostly there because royalty and regalness.

Masahiko finds himself too dignified for such an unsightly sweater vest, so he refuses to wear it. Everyone thinks he’s attractive, so it’s not like they mind at all. I debated giving him an actual tie instead of the bowstring, but you see how that went.

Masahiko is, beyond a doubt, supposed to be a pretty city boy. I guess the theme I was going with there was ‘almost model material but never touched a runway.’ But guys are hard to make outfits for.

This time he did leave the ribbon behind, and I think he feels better for it.

Hoshiko Akiyama

I’ve decided that Hoshiko is an aspiring designer, but her looks are quirky and eccentric because she cares more about dressing up others rather than making herself look good. (She’s self conscious about her red hair, and seems to have deemed herself unable to model any of her good designs). Anyway, I wanted her to look cute but also a little bit odd.

As per my idea for her to be a designer, it seems in character that she’d do some work on her sweater vest. However, it’s still green. I just replaced the other one with this black one because of the design.

Both dresses are knee length, and all of the bracelets are purposefully mismatched. 

As the one from the winter, her top is replaced with one she embroidered herself. 

Jun Sanada

He seemed like the kind of character that would wear graphic tee. But the other shirt makes it look closer to the original picture. His symbol is uses as an earring.

I can’t decide if the shoddy job I did on cutting the shirt out from its background, making it look ratty and tattered, should stick or not.

Simple guy, people think he’s kinda princely until he opens his mouth and his temper explodes.

Again, not much to say on the matter.

Shinju Kawaguchi

The overall dress could be either blue or the pink that it is. I haven’t quite decided if the pretty cloak stays or not, but it is adorable, no? I think, instead of the bow being on the side of her head, it would be tied in the back.

The symbol she has is worn as a ring, and not much else to say.

My editing job is not great, but the blue dress has two straps. The others are both knee length as well.

Not much to say about this one.

Plot/Playthrough

July 10: Masahiko returns to school You’re unable to talk to him.

July 11: You get to talk to Masahiko. He and Miyako argue a bit, but make up afterwards.

July 12 - 14: Exam prep.

July 15 - 17: Exams days.

July 18: Last day of exams. Hoshiko enters the scene and confesses her love to MC. 

July 19: Summer vacation starts. You go celebrate Masahiko’s release from the hospital with the rest of the team. 

July 20 - 21: Some event things that have to be done before we move on in plot and don’t allow you to really do anything.

July 22: Avis will convince you to sneak away from your duties and into the Endless Forest, as there has been a rise in infected victims and corrupted cores that you need to take care of NOW. You meet The Plague, and find out Hoshiko has followed you.

July 23 - 25: You and your friends try to talk to Hoshiko, but she’s in too much of a stupor for it. 

July 26: It becomes apparent that Hoshiko’s core is corrupted and that she has a palace. You enter the palace, Hoshiko following once again, and she awakens her Persona.

July 27 - August 12: Your available days to complete Hoshiko’s palace before it kills her. 

August 13: Hoshiko is released from the hospital. 

August 14: School starts up again. Hoshiko joins the others at school. You meet Jun and stop him from hitting Hoshiko after she rejects him. 

August 15 - 17: No free time. You and your friends escort Hoshiko everywhere when it becomes apparent Jun is still trying to push the issue. He challenges you to a fight, which you can either just brush off or deny. Either way, you won’t fight him.

August 18: You expect it to be like before, but Jun keeps his distance and resumes his princely persona.

August 19: It’s finally time for Hoshiko’s release party. The party is interrupted by Jun fighting outside, beating another guy to a pulp.

We start the story again on August 19. Hoshiko tells you about how she was leaving, she heard about a young man who’d been brought into the hospital just as she was leaving it and died only a couple hours later from the virus. He’d showed no signs of symptoms before being brought in.

The fight breaks out outside the restaurant and once again, you go and stop it. Reactions will differ depending on gender; “She’s a girl!”, “You can’t hit girls!”, “That was highly improper!” verses “He was just trying to help!”, “Don’t be a dick!”, “Why would you do that!?”

You get the guy who Jun was beating up away, but now he’s PISSED and starts breaking shit. Sayaka tries to talk to him, but that kinda blows up in her face. Rather literally. He goes to lash out at her, a flash of guilt crossing his face, the moment right before you slug him. Whatever you tell him, he’ll immediately leave.

You won’t see Jun again until August 17, the next Monday. He’ll be back to his normal princely self as he’s followed around school by a gaggle of girls who fawn over and worry about him, though shows the most subtle of problematic behavior. (Namely bossing people around and getting absolutely furious if the task he gave them is not done at all, not done quick enough, or not done to his liking) The littlest things can set him off.

You’ll have four days of being free to do as you like, but then Masahiko and Miyako will bring it to your attention on August 22 that their classmate’s core is turning black. Sayaka will offhandedly comment that a bastard like him deserves it. You can agree or disagree with her, but no matter what you choose, an argument will be unavoidable. The morality of knowing you can do something to save someone’s life and willingly not do it because you don’t like them- essentially, MURDER- or saving someone who makes the lives of others miserable.

Regardless of what side you took originally, the argument will be made “We do not have the right to decide who lives or who dies; we were given the power to save, and that’s what we have to do.”

Thus, you and your team will go under the waterfall to locate his Palace and all that fun stuff. 

But, you know. Obviously Jun has been ‘stalking’ you for the last several days because he’s wanted to know what Hoshiko sees in you. And though confused about what you were talking about, he recognized himself as the topic of discussion, and the wary glances of Miyako and Masahiko, and follows you into the waterfall.

Which is honestly a terrible idea. You get through it a little before Jun shows up and… basically royally screws up everything by confronting the fucking Corruption. And then awakens his Persona, because he’s just that much of a dick.

But, you know what, fine. It’s fine. Seriously fine. It’s just that you barely manage to fight your way free, but it’s fine. Really fine. But whatevs’, right? 

No, not really. Jun, being the huge dickhead he is right now, basically forces himself onto the team despite what the others want and how skittish Hoshiko is of him. He also kinda refuses to really let anyone explain anything. (His full explanation will have to wait until after he gets out of the hospital)

The next day begins your dungeon crawl. August 23 - September 13 will be your dungeon crawl days. The longer you take to complete the Palace, the more you’ll be able to see the signs that Jun is unraveling and falling apart. There will be a time in the middle of the crawl that you’ll have to leave the Palace because Jun collapses from the exhaustion of pushing himself past his limits. When you complete the Palace, he will collapse again and will remain in a sleep that’s not quite a coma until September 13. 

Jun’s dungeon is a swamp, mirroring his rather nasty personality that drives people away once they get too close. The middle, where you need to go, is basically Jun’s shadow trapped in a cage. As all the others, he’s slumped over and already looks dead. The further you go, the more Jun realizes just how shitty his personality is and how much he wants it gone. The reason he collapses is because he pushes himself towards the goal with the idea that, if the Corruption goes and takes the virus away, then the Shadow leaving will take his misplaced anger issues away. (This misplaced idea comes from the fact he didn’t listen, at all, to what they were trying to explain). This Palace will be really battle heavy, so be prepared for that. 

The final battle against Jun’s Corrupted Anger will be your hardest yet, but you will make it through, as is the nature of this game. It’ll be a bit of a struggle trying to open the cage, but you’ll manage to free Jun’s Shadow so the MC can get to healing him. Jun will attack his Shadow before you can get there, though. Weak and helpless as the Shadow is, it won’t fight back, and Jun will almost manage to inadvertently kill himself before he’s pulled back by Yudai and someone else. The MC removes the corruption from Jun’s core and saves him. They return to the real world and Jun collapses from what he did to his Shadow.

September 14, Jun will return to school. He will apologize for his behavior directly to the MC, still not exactly a good person and still kind of a dick as he really only apologizes to the MC. He asks to formally be accepted into the group if you’ll have him, and for everything to be explained to him, properly this time. He promises he’ll listen. (Some time during this encounter, Miyako and Masahiko will drag Jun behind a door and do… something to him. You don’t see anything, just hear the sounds, and it’s implied that they smack him around a good couple of times, but they all come out looking mostly unharmed)

You won’t have a lot of time to worry about anything regarding the other world or Endless Forest, as on the 15 will be Jun’s release party and on the 16, you all head to Tokyo. Four days of exploring and scripted events, and on September 20, you’ll chill with your significant other of choice on the beach, or Shinju and Yuuki. During your trip, you’ll be able to notice how Shinju keeps looking sicker and sicker. She’s putting on a brave front and forces herself to look happy and okay, but she’s quite obviously not. Her core begins to turn black. Unfortunately, due to timing, you won’t be able to hang out with Jun at this time. But on September 21, his social link become available! So there’s always that.

Actual plot wise, on September 21 and 22, you’ll have a nightmare about the Other World. It’ll be incredibly shitty, and leave yout out of sorts and unable to do any activities those days. On September 23, you’ll get a dream from Igor, who is cryptic in his warnings, but tells you that you need to be careful, as things are very quickly going to change. Gilbert/Lucius tells you to remember to keep your bonds close, and look for new ones where you can.

One September 24 after you wake up, there will be a surprise assembly. Dr. Ueda will come to the front of the gym and stand with the teachers as he explains that the virus has become too deadly in recent months, and has been classified as an epidemic. The town has been quarantined off; no one gets in or out any time soon.

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[elizabeth-234]

A Night She won’t Soon Forget

Hi all! Hope you are doing well. Thank you to those who are reading and enjoy :)

Previous Chapter Four: A Day Gone Wrong

Chapter Five: A Day She Receives Some News

Soot dislodged from a clump clinging to the side of the fireplace. Penny dug the shovel underneath and scooped the particles up, coughing as they floated into the air. She dropped the pile into the bucket and after sweeping out the remainder of the soot, pushed herself to her feet and stared at the finished work.

Penny wiped a hand across her forehead hoping none of the soot smeared on her face, but as she picked up the bucket to bring it to the back to empty it, noticed the dark stains on her shirt and pants, not to mention her fingernails were encrusted with the ashes. She could smell the burnt, dark scent on herself and scrunched her nose.

With a shake of her head, Penny felt through the material of her shirt and traced the outline of the letter from Ned. It was safe, tucked away and hidden there. There was no time to place it in her tin upstairs and, if she was being honest, it was comforting to feel the paper against her skin throughout the day.

She couldn’t read most of the words but in the corner, Ned drew a picture of the fireplace in his new home. One similar to the one she’d cleaned moments before, though this one was full of a light and a roaring fire. Stockings hung down from the ledge filled with different names. It was a proud discovery. Ned had taught her how to write and read his name, and his moniker was one of the first things she’d noticed on the picture.

Penny wondered why he was sending her a drawing of their drying socks, but it was Ned and he’d always had a wild imagination. Though, she’d much rather he was there with her, at least the card was a perfect Christmas present.

Her only present this year.

Soot shaped fingerprints stained the edges of the letter and she shoved it back into its nesting place at her side to prevent further damage. Work needed to be done and she couldn’t sit around woolgathering all day. With new determination to finish up Penny grabbed the bucket and her tools.

Penny slid down the wall between hers and Ned’s bed. She liked to image Ned was out running errands. That he would come back dripping with snow and wearing a smile as they giggled across the gap late into the night.

Her hand cupped her shoulder, rubbing the bones and muscles. She placed them with deliberateness to cover the large imprints with her own smaller digits. The purple marks peeked out from under her hand, dark ghostly fingers still clutching at her skin.

Penny shivered as her thoughts turned to her time alone in the basement.

Her fingers trembled. She took the letter out hoping for a distraction. The paper rustled even with her careful finger placement around the edges, hoping not to get anymore soot on it. She looked at the picture again. Four socks hanging from the fireplace. One was significantly smaller than the one with Ned’s name…

Dorothy giggled causing Penny to push to the letter to her chest. She stared at the girls playing a game of dice in the corner of the dormer while her heart calmed its racing rhythm. Dorothy and the other boy had to keep switching teams because the dice set wasn’t complete. Keeping a glare off her face Penny looked back to her letter.

“Shit.” Her face paled at the stain in the center of the paper right where she laid it on her shirt.

“No, no, no” she said waving her hand in the air over it trying to get it off but not willing to touch it further. She stared down at it, seeing only Ned’s disappointed face. One she might never see again.

Tears pricked at the corners of her eyes. Ned’s bed stood mockingly next to her. Her face had almost split when he’d told her the news.

His face red with a combination of the news and running up the stairs. She’d laughed at his attempts to get the words out, thinking one of the kids had done something stupid again.

“I’m… Penny, I’m being adopted.” He’d said with such abandoned glee. His face the most open, eyes wide with delight, that she’d ever seen him with.

And she smiled…. And smiled some more, squealing with Ned. They jumped up and down in the dormer hugging one another all while Penny’s heart broke and her flame dimmed.

Betty came running into the room, cheeks red and yelled at them all, bringing Penny out of her reverie.

“Everyone make yourself presentable. She’s back and we’re supposed to be downstairs.”

The group playing stopped and stared at Betty who put her hands on her hips and did her best impression of Mrs. Delores.

“Don’t just stand there. Get moving.” She snapped grabbing her shoes and exited the room.

Everyone in the dormer clambered around the sink. Penny looked at herself and the letter, which she stuffed back into her shirt. A creeping itch entered her limbs and Penny shifted where she was sitting. The lady was here again and she looked like a little child of the woods covered in cinder and dirt. She left a lingering gaze at the line to the mirror before sighing and brushing down her clothes as best she could.

At the base of the stairs, Penny stood behind Dorothy at the back.

“In line everyone. Get in line. John, keep your hands to yourself and stand next to Betty.” Mrs. Delores fussed with Betty’s tie on her blouse and glared at the rest of them. She turned and walked back to the lady standing in the entry hall.

The two women sized up the children in front of them. Penny, who was squished between the wall and Flash looked at her shoes.

“Now. As I’m sure your aware we have a guest.” Mrs. Delores said the word in such a manner Penny was certain was not complementary. “As such you need to shut up and listen.”

The lady’s mouth opened at the harsh language but stopped when a few children giggled under their breaths. She stepped forward and surveyed them with kind eyes. Penny looked at her from under her bangs. Her hand unconsciously played with the end of her hair.

Today she was wearing a masculine styled hat. A fedora, Penny thought, remembering the one Ned looked at in the window of one of the stores they passed on their way to get groceries. This one had a small black feather sticking out the back toward the ceiling. Her outfit coordinated between the buttoned coat and skirt. Her heels clicked against the wood of the entry way and for the first time Penny was happy she’d cleaned the floors.

“Alright, um, thank you for that introduction.” She said with scrunch of her nose. “My name is Pepper Potts and I’m here on behalf of my boss. Is it alright if I talk to you, one on one?”


“What for lady?” Someone, John, spoke up. The others snickered at his words and waited to hear the reaction. Mrs. Delores face blushed deep at John’s gall.

“Well, we’re trying to find someone very special. Someone who would be able to come home with us for the holidays, if possible.” Whispering started and in haste she added. “My boss has been looking to help underprivileged youths in the city and so we’ve come here. Will you cooperate?”

Penny wasn’t sure what underprivileged meant but from the tone the lady used it seemed like something to describe them. It didn’t sound positive.

Most everyone nodded and the lady, Mrs. Potts, turned to Mrs. Delores.

“I’ll be using your office if you have no objections.”

Mrs. Delores’s mouth opened along with a vein throbbing on her forward but voiced no objections and Penny found herself on the stairs waiting her turn. She watched as the other children went into the office, grins on their faces instead of grimaces. A day without chores would do that.

The ones waiting around Penny whispered questions that mirrored her thoughts about Mrs. Potts. Who was she? What did she mean she wanted to take someone home? Why was she wearing a man’s hat?

A steady stream of children entered and exited the room. Some children’s interviews lasted mere minutes while others dragged on until finally it was Penny’s turn.

She brushed down her shirt, took a full breath in, and pushed the door open. Mrs. Potts sat in one of the chairs in front of the desk and gestured to the chair next to her when she saw Penny. Penny slid into it, careful to sit up with correct posture on the edge and not spread the soot anywhere.

Under the attention of the woman’s stare Penny fidgeted, clasping and unclasping her hands in her lap. She peered up and the women smiled causing a flush to rise on her neck and cheeks.

She noticed the woman’s eyes remaining on her clothes. Penny crossed her arms in front of her chest to block the soot from view.

“I’m- I’m real sorry about my appearance, Ma’am.”

She waved with a soft smile.

“You don’t have to worry about that, Penny, right?”
Penny nodded. “Well, Penny, you don’t have to worry about calling me ma’am or Mrs. Potts. It would be Ms. Potts anyway and I would prefer Pepper. I’m curious about you? The others have told me all about themselves and I was wondering if you felt comfortable doing the same?”

Penny thought of everything she could say. All the great things she’d told herself all the parents, her parents, were missing, but under Mrs. Potts’s smile she knew she had to tell the truth.

“I’m not special. There’s a reason I’m at Midtown, Ms. Potts, and I don’t want to show myself off as something I’m not. I’m just Penny and I’m sure your boss would want someone much better.”

Penny tugged her fingers until she heard a pop. She squeezed her fingers together knowing a dismissal was on its way.  

“Penny, I’m not sure who told you all of that but the person I see in front of me is very different than the person you described.”

Penny furrowed her brow and glared with skepticism. Mrs. Potts laughed at the face and took a plate off of the desk.

“Have a cookie, Penny.”

Penny grabbed a cookie not hungry but wanting to save it for later.

Mrs. Potts stood up and the interview was over. Penny followed her to the door. She glanced back and her stomach clenched. Had she really said all that? Had she really sabotaged this chance to get away like she did everything else in her life?

The knot in her stomach grew the closer she got to the door. She felt like everything was slipping away from her. That she had just been standing at the edge of a great flame and, too scared it would burn, she ran away.

With heels clicking, Ms. Potts opened the door and with a brief hand on Penny’s shoulder disappeared behind the door

Someone called out to her asking how it went but Penny ignored them and ran up the stairs. She stared at Ned’s empty one from her own spot under the covers realizing he would never be back and she was stuck here. Alone with her runaway mouth.  

-

Snow flurried on the breeze and into the doorway Penny was emerging from. Her bare hands gripped the buttons of her shirt. They shook from the temperature, impeding her from buttoning the ones with buttons still attached.

With a growl she stuffed her hands into her pockets, grasping the grocery list in her left hand and bringing them together to keep the wind out.

Someone laughed and Penny froze before looking up. Ms. Potts stood at their gate bundled up in an outfit perfect for the opera. She giggled again, bringing her hand up to cover her mouth, at her lame attempt to button her over shirt. Penny blushed and tried to cross her arms in front of her, though it didn’t quite work with her hands in her pockets.

Ms. Potts walked forward up the path from the gate. The furs lining her coat to caught more snow particles making them look like sparkles emanating from her.

“I really shouldn’t laugh, Penny, but you made the most darling sound just now.” She said and smiled.

Like the last time the woman put her hand on Penny’s shoulder, her eyes closed automatically but she managed not to flinch this time. She didn’t expect the warm feeling coursing through her chest to arise again. Not when she knew the women was not here for her. When she opened her eyes, Ms. Potts was glaring at the over shirt she wore.

“Please tell me this is not what passes for a winter coat these days?” She sniped.

Penny pressed her hands closer together, straining the fabric a bit but covering herself more against the elements.

“No, of course not. I just didn’t bother putting something heavier.” She hoped the blush on her cheeks wouldn’t give away her lie. It seemed the lie, punctuated by a shiver was found out instantly. Ms. Potts clicked her tongue and caught Penny by the shoulder changing her trajectory in one warm, almost hug.

“We’ll see about that.” she said and led them inside.

All different protests came to mind, but in a bout of shyness Penny remained silent as she seemed to be prone to when Ms. Potts was around.

She, along with Penny dragged behind her, burst into Mrs. Delores’s office, interrupting the woman’s afternoon work.

Mrs. Delores woke with a start and at the sight of them her jaw gaped.

“I thought I gave you things to get, girl?” She said before turning her hard expression to Ms. Potts.

Penny opened her mouth but her captor went full steam ahead.

“Be that as it may, I asked Penny here to guide me to the office and now she’s done that most excellently I would ask that she wait in the hallway. Thank you, Penny.”

It was directed at Penny but Ms. Potts gaze never left the woman behind the desk. Penny nodded trying to smile but ended up grimacing.

She sat on the bench across from the closed door and wondered what they were talking about. It was unheard of for someone to talk to Mrs. Delores that way; to put her in her place so politely. The set down would make her in a terrible mood but it couldn’t erase the smile off of Penny’s face.  

The list of supplies remained clenched in her hands and Penny waited.

When the door opened a sigh escaped her even when it was Mrs. Delores and not Ms. Potts.

“Get inside.” She said and pointed into the room. Penny didn’t think she’d been inside the office so much before.

Ms. Potts sat down with an untouched cup of tea in front of her. Her smile was full, real, and so much like the one she gave Penny the first time they’d met. Penny stood in the center of the carpet and waited for instructions from Mrs. Delores. Without looking away from her, something that was making Penny fidget, Ms. Potts asked Mrs. Delores to give them the room.

Mrs. Delores’s face turned an ugly shade of maroon but she left without a peep. The door slammed behind her though Ms. Potts pretended she didn’t hear.

They sat in the same chairs as last time. Penny waited for something to happen, for anything to to be said or for her to be sent on her way. She was almost glad Mrs. Delores sent her out without breakfast because her stomach was doing loops as the silence progressed.

“I think the first thing we’ll have to do is sort you out some new clothes. A real winter jacket, preferably one in a jeweled eggplant tone perhaps. That would go beautifully with your hair. And don’t worry it will be warmer than that excuse for a coat.” Ms. Potts sniffed at the jacket she was wearing.

Penny couldn’t believe it. She wouldn’t.

“Ms. Potts with all due respect my hair is not beau- Wait, what do you mean new clothes?”

“Of course, your hair is beautiful. I’ve spent hours getting my hair done to have curls like yours, although it may need to be grown out a little before we can cut it properly. But I’ve gotten ahead of myself, haven’t I? Tony always says I do.” She said with a smile before getting back to business. “Well, you do remember the last time I came to visit? Yes, I thought you might. We, as in my boss and me, have decided that you, that is, if you want to, will come and live with us for the holidays. As a sort of foster program, if you will.”

For the first time Ms. Potts didn’t look at her and her words flowed not with the ease they had before but with a measured character Penny would puzzle over later.

Her mind raced. They were talking about her? The Penny who had met the woman with soot stains everywhere. The same Penny who told Ms. Potts she was under no circumstances special. The one who fell victim to her anger and peer pressure. The one whose hair was not beautiful. The Penny whose parents didn’t want her.

“I…” Her words failed her. Tears collected on her bottom lashes and she clenched the grocery list in her hands no longer trembling from the cold.  

“Oh, sweetheart.” Ms. Potts whispered and enveloped Penny in her arms.

Her tears came slow and thick, not ready to be fully released yet. She was stiff under the arms but Penny was melting on the inside. Ned was the last person to hug her and she missed them so much. She pulled back to look at the lady who had her own watery eyes.

“Why?” She whispered.

“For all the reasons you told me last time, my sweet girl.  Because you’re Penny and that is more than I could have hoped for.” She winked at Penny who was blushing from being called sweet. With a tentative, tight smile Penny rubbed her cheeks with the back of her sleeve.

She looked at the door expecting Mrs. Delores to come running in yelling ‘gotcha!’

The door remained closed.

“Would you like to join us for the holidays, Penny?” She said, leaning forward.

The question was more complicated than it seemed. Penny felt like she was being asked to jump out of the dorm window without knowing there would be something to break her fall. She felt like she was standing before the fire again and with one wrong move she would burn up into nothing.

Penny wondered if Ms. Potts was confused or if it was some weird rich people thing.

Why her?

The question it appeared wouldn’t be answered but the soft look in Ms. Potts’s eyes was enough for now. There was a wide hope springing from them and onto Penny that had her reckless with it.

“I…I think I would like that very much.”

Mrs. Potts smiled and touched her shoulder for the third and softest time. Penny leaned into the warmth.

Mrs. Delores came back into the room with eyes narrowed and metaphorical battle clothes on.

“I hope I’m not interrupting.” She said to Ms. Potts.

“Naturally not. Penny has accepted and, though I won’t be able to take her with me tonight, she will be there tomorrow, for Christmas day.”

Penny’s heart leapt.

Mrs. Delores sneered and sat behind the desk, flourishing her pen as she signed the various documents from Ms. Potts. Penny sat further to the edge of her seat, eyes trained on Mrs. Delores.

They talked over various points in the documents but Penny tuned them out. Instead she traced the words on her grocery list repeatedly.

When they were done, Ms. Potts looked over and brushed a curl from Penny’s face. She gathered her gloves and hat.

“Don’t worry, my sweet girl. I’ll be back tomorrow. Say about eleven? Will you have your bags packed and everything? Good. Until then.” She straightened her hat and put on her gloves, then looked at Mrs. Delores. “I expect Penny to be in the same condition as I left her today. Do you understand?”

Mrs. Delores clenched her jaw and merely said, “I’m sure you can see yourself out.”

The stared at each other before Ms. Potts marched out of the room and building. Penny wished she could disappear right then and there as Mrs. Delores’s venomous look landed on her.

“I bet you think you’re so lucky. Don’t you, girl? Well here’s a newsflash, that woman, those people, don’t give a shit about you. They’re going to use you, ain’t they? I can see it in your face. You know they will. And like all of us on the bottom of the barrel, once they’re done, you’ll be right back here with us.”

Penny shook her head.

“That’s - No, it’s not true.”



“Not true! Imagine that, I have it here in the papers. My sweet girl” Penny flinched at the endearment coming from her mouth. “The Anthony Stark, yeah you’ve heard of him, I knew you have, needs a bump in the numbers. He needs the press to be kind to him and taking an orphan in is just the thing to do it, eh? That’s why they picked you out of everyone. You’re the most pathetic, saddest, sorry excuse for an urchin if I ever seen one. And I have cause I look after you all. Now quite you’re sniveling. I don’t want to look at you until they throw you back with the garbage.”

Penny sobbed into her sleeve and ran out of the room. Mrs. Delores’s smile remaining in her thoughts as she collapsed into bed. She didn’t care if she kept everyone up. She didn’t care if everyone could hear her tears that night.

She tried to remember Ms. Potts’s warm hug and the soft tone she used to say sweet girl and cried harder, hiccupping into the pillow.

It didn’t matter it was Christmas Eve. It didn’t matter Santa never came.

She was alone again. Ned was gone. Mrs. Potts was gone. And her parents were never coming.

Penny shivered from the sheer depth of her anguish. Her throat raw and eyes red manifestations of the feelings welling inside of her.

The other children slept in their beds dreaming of presents and cookies. Penny was left awake thinking about Anthony Stark and the iron mask in his crest pressed into the papers that would change her fate.

The question that kept the sleep at bay was would he be a black knight or chivalrous one?

Notes: Pepper's hat I imagined as either the Robin hood or fedora shape: Here Also, I wanted Pepper to make the distinction between Mrs. and Ms. which the latter gained popularity in the 1900s, though most associated with later 20th century I think Pepper is a modern woman here and would want to be titled as such. You can read more here!

Thank you!!

Taglist: @whatisthou @warmwithafewfrostymoments

Next Chapter Six: 

[the-desolated-quill]

Absent Friends - Watchmen blog

(SPOILER WARNING: The following is an in-depth critical analysis. if you haven’t read this comic yet, you may want to before reading this review)

At Midnight, All The Agents managed to set the tone with its cynical and biting critique of superheroes, presenting them as being violent felons or worthless failures indulging in power fantasies. The second issue, Absent Friends, sinks its teeth even deeper as we take a look at the Comedian’s past via flashbacks whilst the other characters attend his funeral and pay their respects.

So lets talk about the Comedian.

Aside from the accusations of rape, the first issue didn’t go into too much detail about Edward Blake, other than that no one besides Rorschach seemed to like him very much. This issue goes into much more detail as we see the Comedian at four major points in his history.

The first flashback is that of the Minutemen back in 1940, where we see Eddie try to rape Sally Jupiter, the first Silk Spectre. It’s a very shocking and disturbing scene, not just because of the fact that he’s supposed to be a superhero, but also because of the sheer brutality of the attack. Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons don’t hold back in depicting Comedian’s sickening behaviour, but they also don’t become too indulgent with it. They clearly take no pleasure from depicting this type of sexual violence and there is a legitimate artistic reason why it’s there. Prior to the flashback, we see the two Silk Spectres discuss the Comedian. Laurie is disgusted that Sally would have anything positive to say about Eddie after what he did, but what I find most interesting is a moment during the conversation where Sally shows Laurie a porno comic of her. This, to me, reveals what Moore and Gibbons are getting at here. Namely the role of women in superhero comics.

Female superheroes have always been something of a paradox. They need to be strong and independent, but not too strong and independent. We can’t have Wonder Woman upstaging Superman, now can we? Oh and of course they need to look sexy. Long hair flowing. Plenty of bare flesh showing. Tight leather outfits. High heels. Makeup. Never mind the fact that this getup is not remotely practical or appropriate to fight crime in. 

While this sexist attitude is slowly and thankfully fading away from modern comics, historically there has always been this kind of seediness to how women are presented in comics. They’re not there to empower women. They’re there to appeal to the male gaze. Sexy athletic women with massive boobs beating the shit out of baddies. They are, for lack of a better term, sex objects. Watchmen takes this to its extreme, presenting both Silk Spectres as being incredibly sexualised to the point where some characters, like the Comedian and the pornographer who made the comic, perceive them as being little more than sex objects. Not only that, but Sally and Laurie’s different perspectives on this sexualisation reflects the changing attitudes about women in comics at the time. Sally accepts the porno comics and the attempted rape as par for the course. The reality of being a woman. She even chose her costume herself in order to draw attention to herself in the hopes of jump-starting a modelling career. Laurie meanwhile didn’t choose the sexualised image that has been thrust onto her and is very vocal in her distaste toward how she’s perceived and how her mother is willing to brush it aside. People often have a tendency to write off Silk Spectre as being the weak link, but I don’t think that’s fair. There’s a lot going on with this character and in our current age of MeToo and social media empowering women to open up about their experiences, she’s a character that has become more and more relevant as time goes on.

The second flashback depicts Captain Metropolis trying to recruit the main characters into ‘the Crime Busters,’ only for the Comedian to ruin it with his nihilistic attitude. This mainly serves as a takedown of superhero crossovers like Justice League and the Avengers. Rorschach even comments on it, saying it feels more like a publicity stunt. It also serves as subtle foreshadowing for Ozymandias’ plan, but we’ll come to that in a future blog. But most importantly, it displays the Comedian’s changing attitude towards crime fighting. When he was with the Minutemen, he was happy to indulge in his own violent fantasies by beating up criminals, but now he’s become aware of how pointless it all is due to the Cold War. Capes and masks are useless against the nukes.

The next flashback depicts the Comedian and Doctor Manhattan fighting (and winning) the Vietnam War. This is probably my least favourite of the flashbacks and it’s because of Eddie killing a Vietnamese woman he had impregnated months earlier. Whereas the attempted rape of Sally felt thematically justified, the murder of a pregnant woman just felt like shock for the sake of shock and doesn’t really serve a purpose other than to reinforce the fact that the Comedian is a horrible human being. But it does raise an important issue. Superheroes and patriotism.

America has a few superheroes associated with it. Superman. Spider-Man. Captain America. But very rarely do comics explore the impact a superhero would have on a country’s political standing in the world. Having a superhuman associated with your country could tip the scales greatly in your favour, which is exactly what happens in Watchmen. Thanks to Doctor Manhattan and the Comedian, America is able to win the Vietnam War, turning it into the fifty first state. The United States is much more powerful than any country on Earth thanks to the likes of Manhattan, which is what has escalated the Cold War because the Russians are running scared of the threat America poses.

Morally speaking, any superhero who truly believes in justice and heroism should ideally be completely impartial. Siding with one country over another could seriously compromise the hero. But how, you might be tempted to ask. A superhero serving his country doesn’t sound so bad, right? Except there’s a world of difference between fighting for moral good and fighting for your country. This isn’t the same as stopping a mugger and giving an old lady her purse back. In war, good and evil isn’t so clearly defined. So by sending a superhero into a war zone, you’re effectively demonising a whole nation of people. Because the side with the hero must be good and the side fighting the hero must be bad, right? It imposes a black and white mentality onto a situation that is, to put it mildly, incredibly messy.

Another problem with having superheroes in the army (or any form of law enforcement) is that superheroes are a law unto themselves. They exist outside the chain of command. While, yes, the police and the military are both deeply flawed institutions, there are laws and safeguards that (in theory) prevent officers from abusing their power. Superheroes don’t have that. So with no one holding them to account, there’s nothing to stop them from going too far, as we see the Comedian do many times.

Which brings us to the fourth flashback. The police strike of 1977 where we see the Comedian and Nite Owl try to stop the riots and we hear about congress pushing through the Keene Act to outlaw superheroes.

Like Rorschach, the Comedian is also based on a Charlton Comics character. The Peacemaker. A militaristic superhero who believes heavily in pacifism and wishes to bring peace to the world.... through violence.

Yeah, I don’t get it either. But honestly, it feels like Moore and Gibbons are using the Comedian to take the piss out of Peacemaker. He’s a ‘superhero’ and yet we see him fire rubber bullets and tear gas at a crowd of people, murder a pregnant woman and try to rape someone. It’s as if they’re saying that it’s impossible to be both a hero and violent. We have a romanticised view of superheroes fighting crime, but where do we draw the line? Why is the rape of a woman unacceptable, but the beating of a criminal okay? Is it because the criminal is quote/unquote ‘evil?’ So are we saying that a criminal’s life is worthless the minute they break the law? If that’s the case, then the conversation has turned away from superheroes and toward fascism.

Many people describe the Comedian as a nihilist, which is true, but what a lot of people fail to recognise is that all the characters are technically nihilists. They all believe the world has no morality or meaning, but whereas the other characters of Watchmen impose their own personal morality onto the world, the Comedian does the opposite. He embraces the chaos and amorality of the world around him and uses his superhero identity to indulge in sex and violence. It’s what makes the smiley face logo so appropriate for the Comedian. Like the smiley face, superheroes are supposed to represent all that is good and just about this world. But just as the blood stain taints the smiley face, violence and corruption taints the image of the superhero.

The issue ends with Rorschach breaking into the cemetery to pay his respects and his final monologue I think perfectly sums up the despicable, but fascinating nature of the Comedian. In his journal, he tells the joke about Pagliacci, a clown whose act is recommended by a therapist as a cure for a patient’s depression. Except the patient in question is Pagliacci. 

What hope does America have when the superhero that’s meant to save them is just as corrupt and amoral as them?

[ourmanifestoisfun]

4x14 episode thoughts

We’re back from hiatus! And I was finally able to sit down and watch the episode and I AM SO EXCITED BY THINGS!!!

“The navy. it brings out the sparkle of justice in your eyes” is such a cute line

Marco, you are a terrible businessman

I feel that all of the reasons that Greg lists to be in West Covina for his thesis are legitimate, personally. Being near Rebecca is probably a nice bonus. 

I do like that he apparently asked Heather to help out, given that she is very competent and no-bullshit kind of person.

Actually, the parallel “I’m not in love with Rebecca” scenes were a bit much, but I think they showed something kind of interesting in the extent to which the guys’ feelings are influencing all of them in their actions. Like Greg’s priority is very much the restaurant and Rebecca being nearby is more of a really nice bonus, Nathaniel’s volunteer work and interest in Rebecca are about equal since he started out doing it for her but is doing it more because it is the right thing to do while still be interested, and Josh is doing theater tech directly because of Rebecca. I don’t know if it is meant to be scaled like that, but I feel like it is, which is interesting.

Estrella judging Josh was the best.

I do like the set of Il Cabino. Not entirely sure when they started to use it, but it’s pretty

What is a cold chamber, exactly? What’s its purpose?

I feel bad for Valencia feeling let down about Beth’s surprise, but given rent and housing these days, it is a very big deal that you need to sit down and talk about.

“Quite an engagement” - not how you drop a hint, Valencia. Though I have to say, in this case rather that Valencia being concerned about appearances the way she was in her relationship with Josh, it seems just like she is ready to be with Beth for good, and part of her romantic hopes still include a proposal. She still loves those things, and she wants them for herself.

I don’t like ultimatums in general, but I do understand Valencia’s point, in that she knows what she wants with Beth right now, and she wants to know that they are on the same page, because she has been in a relationship where she waited and the other person didn’t know what they wanted/were happy to stay where they were, and she doesn’t want that again.

It was left unresolved, but I hope that they do get engaged/married. I wanna see Rebecca helping out at their wedding and killing it!

Valencia speaking from experience is both good advice to be cautious but also :(

Josh doing theater tech actually makes me happy. Sure, he’s doing it to be near Rebecca, but he’s so good at making people look and feel good about the best parts of themselves, that being part of a stage crew might actually be a good fit for him.

…though I would still prefer having him as a choreographer in some capacity because canonically, he is such a good dancer.

…Tim really does look like he has chicken legs in that suit. oh dear. I blame the bloomers.

“Our bulwark, our stalwart, our Walmart.” - i just like this wordplay

Nathaniel volunteering (getting volunteered?) for the play had me cackling. While I find the idea that he’s done musical theater before needs a little mental adjustment, I could see him doing it with a mental justification that it looks good on college applications (especially if he got cast in a lead role) and I can definitely see it being something he wouldn’t mention because it does not fit the image he wanted to portray.

Also him singing the alphabet - what a little bastard

Also what’s with that brightly patterned tie, Nathaniel? It’s not bad, I quite like it, but it’s much brighter than what he usually wears

Love Connie’s scarf flinging. And the scarf just keeps getting bigger and bigger until it’s a long cardigan.

Rebecca’s wearing red nail polish!

I love Paula’s interview outfit, it makes her look really good.

Chris!!! He is so tall! And he has a palate!

I love Valencia, Josh and Nathaniel’s expressions at the lyrics to Etta Mae’s Lament

Aunt Myrna reference!

oh Tim, your character song was not forgetful, I promise you that.

I love Paula’s faces though!

Darryl also has quite the palate - and the penmanship!

…canonically, Valencia and Nathaniel have now officially hung out and we did not see any exchanges? RUDE!

They have so much they could talk about! They are both good-looking people with body issues, image issues, and have experienced dramatic shifts in their relationships with Rebecca due to her initiating severely inappropriate kisses. The possibilities are endless!

Josh asking Rebecca to sign the Camp Canyon Grove playbill was super sweet, but I’m glad that it was one he got on eBay, instead of one he actually kept, because it’s mostly giving me very strong “Dear Joshua Felix Chan” vibes and uh…that’s not entirely great.

Nathaniel singing about being a saloon madam is GREAT. Sacrifice your dignity at the altar of love, dude. 

Not that you have much of it left. Which is not a bad thing - it’s good to be willing to sacrifice your dignity, builds character.

I have been wondering for a while now if they would have Rebecca write musical theater songs, and the fact that they are hinting at this pathway is really really exciting to me. Having her actually write the songs in her head and create a musical would be really, genuinely exciting.

“Someone else is singing my song” - oh my GOD my heart fluttered at that. I hope we get a full thing.

I am sad for Darryl but yes, Paula, know your worth!

Mindy-who-is-April! Good to see you as Darryl’s date. Hope things are going swimmingly.

Valencia makes a beautiful pirate bride, but can she actually be the pirate, instead? Because yikes those lyrics!

Paula’s face was exactly right.

I am genuinely sad we missed all of the songs that directly applied to Darryl and Paula’s situation

God, Rebecca’s saloon girl outfit is so cute, even if her song is so terrible.

WHAT’LL IT BE REPRISE!!!!! Called it!

I have mixed feelings about Greg’s revelation that everything he hated about the town was more of a projection and that as a result, he’s going to stay and run his father’s restaurant. Not because I don’t think it makes sense with his character, but I just get tired of the trope that the hometown is always the place you’ll end up again if you change your attitude. Sometimes, hometowns just suck.

But for Greg, who I think has been specifically described as a character who tries to be a caretaker, which running a restaurant that people love would be something that would fulfill him, so I think I’m good with it.

Every time I think I have a grasp on where the love quadrangle stuff is going, it gets a good shake, because while when Rebecca discusses the three guys, she treats it as if they are on the same plane, but when we see their different interactions, they are treated differently.

New tweak to the old theory: given that Greg now has confirmed a dream that is not linked to Rebecca at all, the next two episodes will be showing us what Nathaniel and Josh’s respective paths will be, so that we know that even though the guys might not end up with her, they have something that takes up their time and attention and fulfills them and it’s a good ending for them.

Preferably in that order, because I do still consider Josh to be part of the original series trifecta (Rebecca-Paula-Josh) and given how recent his affection for Rebecca is, I think that will come into play when he finds out what makes him happy and their relationship should be given some extra weight.

Now that Paula is interviewing at other firms, I still kind of hope that her, Nathaniel, and Darryl choose to separate from MountainTop and start their own firm. That could be really interesting and work well with their arcs. Nathaniel and Paula will make it successful, while Darryl gives them heart and makes them less scary to prospective clients.

I will still be very surprised if it ends up being an actual choice rather than a fourth or fifth option being taken, but given how the “true love is theater” concept got called out in this episode, I really am not sure where it’s gonna go. Still excited to find out!

[tremendouspeachduck]

2 Things You Must Know About  the REPUBLICAN, AMERICAN INDIAN

No.  Really?

above car - 1933 Chevy 3-window coup w/rumble seat

Do you think Pres. Trump is a bully, I don’t.  Why?

Talking about the “War on Men” ���  5 touchy subjects   …

Abortion – should the man have an opinion and be able to voice it?

Free Birth Control    HERE    and    HERE   ***   Please notice, abortion is not listed as a birth control option

Pres Trump would have never won if it weren’t for the black vote  

See Video                                  and this video too       don’t forget this one

Men seem to take it to a whole other level.  The Bible has something to reveal about name calling.  Also, the systematic criticism and self-doubt are what takes it from name calling to verbal abuse – it’s a repeated pattern that, over time, can make the victim believe the insults, making it harder for them to leave (“no one will love me because they said so”).

Beyond name calling, abusers may belittle their partner, either privately publicly, or disguise disparaging comments in jokes. This can be followed up by more judgment and criticism (“You’re too sensitive”) or acting as those what they’ve said is trivial (“I was only joking”). Other examples of name calling include putting someone down, making them feel guilty, or embarrassing and humiliating them.

Healthy relationships don’t use name calling to resolve conflict or express love. Both partners make the other one feel good about themselves. It’s relaxing and fun, and neither tries to “prove” they are the only ones that will ever love them. Instead, each partner sets boundaries on what’s acceptable behavior, including what nicknames or jokes are okay.

Can you think of a great sight to see walking in the city? Click to see it

Recognizing these early warning signs can make the difference between staying in an unhealthy relationship that worsens over time, or ending it and being in one that’s healthy.

Should men care about your makeup?  The correct answer is “yes,”  if it makes the woman happy.  Lips and the smile are what is very appealing to a man.

How to support a woman’s period?  No rude comments about what’s in the trash bin, about her being moody… no jokes, no nothing.  It’s ok to make her laugh, laughter is good medicine BUT do not joke about it being “that time of the month again”.

By knowing her cycle, you can be more aware and sensitive to her changing moods and physical discomfort. This develops a deeper trust as your woman knows you are really present with what she is experiencing. Put it in your calendar so you have a heads up.

Interestingly, having an orgasm can relieve menstrual cramps, though your attitude during the whole cycle will determine whether or not she’s willing to explore this. Again , this is probably best to bring up when she isn’t in the middle of it.

She may act like she doesn’t want you there, but remember she may actually desire some TLC. Your full presence is the best medicine. She will love you for this!

Help create a cozy environment for her, and cook her comfort food. Hugs are also great.  The main thing is to not be an ass. (closing down and or not wanting to deal is being an ass)

Finding ways to be positive is the key to building a healthy body image and positive self-esteem.  What we read and watch has a huge impact on how we feel about ourselves. Because of this, we should be very particular about the magazines and websites we will look at.  We might love reading about the interesting things that people, and women in particular, accomplish.  Shopping centers aren’t only sucking your money, they are also sink holes for body confidence. Getting caught up in a conversation about the way someone else looks, whether they have put on weight and so on, inevitably leads to thoughts on our own appearance.  Don’t participate.  Touch is an incredibly powerful way of reinforcing the way you feel about your body. And if you’re touched gently, with love and care, you will feel incredible. So, try to practice gentle love and care with yourself. Wash your hair the way the hairdresser did. Wash your face the way a beauty therapist would. Give yourself a massage when you’re applying moisturizer. It feels good. And it reinforces a positive, kind relationship with your body.  Meditation is an incredibly effective tool for clearing away unhelpful thought cycles. 10 minutes. 5 minutes. 1. Whatever. Just sit, close your eyes and breathe.

Eating respectfully means accepting and being mindful of the nutrients that your body requires to function. It means eating plenty of good food and ditching sugary and pretend foods that compromise our digestive health, our hormonal balance, our mood and energy levels.  The flip side of eating respectfully is to move past the binge-fast guilt cycle. If you eat something unhealthy, please don’t punish yourself or try to restrict caloric intake. Healthy eating and body respect is not about food deprivation. It’s about food celebration.  When you look in the mirror, try to replace any negative thoughts that are pushing their way through with an affirming thought about the way you look or feel.

People who have purpose are too busy getting stuff done to worry about how they look. In the end, creative expression, passionate parenting, effective leadership and growing the best-goddamn-tomatoes-in-the-neighborhood is far more satisfying than making sure you look good in an outfit at all times.

Positive self-image is a habit, not an attribute and your partner can be helpful.

This is an excerpt from my post: THE IROQUOIS CONFEDERACY: THE “SAVAGE” EMPIRE.

The Haudenosaunee (Iroquois: Mohawk, Seneca, Oneida, Onondaga and Cayuga) really cherished population stability. Being that their population was so limited and ever diminishing due to disease outbreaks and near constant conflicts, the Haudenosaunee highly preferred losing as few men as possible. They usually evaded fighting armies that outnumbered theirs as well as avoiding fortified enemy positions and fighting pitched battles. The Haudenosaunee (Iroquois) preferred instead to employ ambushes, strike preemptively, and launch lightning fast raids under the cover of darkness. The Haudenosaunee would travel deep into enemy territory in very large numbers to scare off potential enemies from attacking them before breaking up into smaller war parties, after which these war parties would utilize swift and stealthy attacks usually in the form of ambushes or night raids.

Closer Look by Doug Hall.

Another tactic the Haudenosaunee (Iroquois) employed was after traveling by way of canoes under the cover of night they would place rocks in the canoes to weigh them down and cause them to sink out of sight They would then speedily assault the enemy in coordinated attacks, vanish back into the wilderness and return to their canoes before the enemy had enough time to recuperate, assemble and counterattack. With the deadliness of firearms introduced into the equation, the Natives learned to fire at enemies from behind the cover of trees instead of the European practice of firing coordinated volleys from fixed formations.

One Step at a Time by Doug Hall.

One disadvantage the Haudenosaunee (Iroquois) had over the Euro-American colonies was that Native populations were constantly diminishing and fluctuating. The Euro-American colonies surrounding them, on he other hand, were growing and receiving a constant flow of immigrants with the occasional military reinforcement from Europe. The limited number of Natives as well as their fear of dying and becoming lost souls, urged them to retreat from battle more readily than Euro-American forces – even after just a few casualties. They used safer methods of combat like the previously mentioned ambushes, night raids, espionage, and scorched earth tactics: destroying their settlements or crops in order to retreat and deprive the enemy of shelter or resources.

A Quick Glance by Doug Hall.

The Natives that wanted to lead a proposed raid against a perceived enemy would send a messenger with tobacco tasked with expressing the purpose and details of the mission, asking them to join their cause. The Haudenosaunee (Iroquois) who decided to engage in said raid would first take part in the smoking of a pipe filled with tobacco. Before leaving for the raid there would be a feast and dancing, during the ‘Dog (War) Feast’ the warriors would engage in a ceremony called the ‘striking-the-warpost’ where they would sing war songs, dance, and boast about their military exploits. After each achievement is mentioned the warrior strikes a red-painted post with their weapon (club or hatchet), the young Natives that had yet to have achieved any great feats simply danced and struck the warpost once.

A Moment Away by David Wright.

If these young Natives had proven themselves to be brave warriors during their expedition they would be seen as men and accepted as a warrior by being given their first feather. These young braves could also attain higher status, honor and prestige. I read of one story of an elder who joined in but in place of dancing he performed an awe inspiring passionate reenactment of his life as a warrior, a deep performance that displayed an array of emotions as he described all that he had experienced and accomplished throughout his lifetime.

man on right - Carson Cooper is a member of the Tlingit and Haida tribes and an Alaska native. Lee Redeye (on left) is a member of the Seneca tribe and was raised on the reservation in Irving and in New Mexico. Both attorneys are relatively new to the law firm Lippes Mathias Wexler Friedman LLP , with Cooper having joined in 2017 and Redeye earlier this year.  

Another attorney, Owen Herne, branched out on his own after beginning his career in corporate counsel for a tribe. He is a member of the Mohawk tribe and runs Herne Law PLLC.

These  three local attorneys in Buffalo, NY took different paths to focus on Indian law, but they share a bond in the desire to build careers around their ancestry.

The Jogah, or Jungies, are a race of small humanoid nature spirits from Iroquois folklore, sometimes referred to in English as “dwarves” or “pygmies.” They are usually invisible but sometimes reveal themselves to humans

After nightfall, the call of the Whip-poor-will signals their arrival.  It is important to leave baskets of food, such as corn cakes and berries, or even meat in the woods for them. Those who see the Little People should not look directly at them, they think it’s rude. If they catch you staring, they might point a finger at you, rooting you to the ground, while they take your belongings. Another rule is don’t speak of them in the summer, when they are most active.

At this time of Bad Spirits, there lived a medicine woman. One night, during a terrible storm, she heard the whip-poor-will. When she looked outside, the bird wasn’t to be found, but a small boy stood in the rain on her doorstep. It turned out he was a grown Jogah, who told her to come help someone who was sick. Though the storm was fierce, he led her through the woods a long way.

Suddenly, the storm seemed to stop as they began to descend into the ground. They were in the realm of the Little People. Weegun led her to a beehive shaped chamber of rocks. Inside, a very old woman lay in bed, very ill. The Makiawisug told the medicine woman that this was Granny Squannit, who must be made well. Granny Squannit is very powerful, and she is known to cause storms when she argues with her husband. Her illness was the reason for this storm. Worse, healers often look to Granny Squannit when the need is dire for help in healing, and here she was the one who was sick. The medicine woman treated Granny Squannit for nearly a moon before she got better. In return for restoring Granny Squannit’s health, the Makiawisug gave the medicine woman a basket of gifts and told her to remember them. She was blindfolded and taken back home.

Only when she returned did she open the basket. Inside were quartz crystals, painted skins and bunches of herbs.

People in the USA have natives who are very spiritual living maybe next door.  Embrace your neighbor - let’s get back to our community roots.

Community involvement is the solution to mass murder/shootings

Close your eyes, lean head back on pillow or head-rest, take deep breaths and listen to the story unfold         Special Cherokee Nation Song video

nice fire & listen to music flute music vid   Do you want to learn the Mohawklanguage?      the sacred horse song    See  My fav horse

Please leave message below, then Go To top, nav to previous or next

[kinetic-elaboration]

The 100 Ask Game

Tagged by @thelittlefanpire --thank you! This looks like fun.

Soooo okay, first, full disclosure: I haven’t watched S5. I stopped watching toward the end of S4 for Reasons. So there might be a little bit of salt and/or confusion in some of my answers. But only a little; this blog is still a positive space and it is, of course, Show Night: a big fandom night regardless of my personal participation.

1. What Station on the Ark would you be from?

Hmm. Well I have farmers and factory workers in my family but I don't know which end of a wrench is up myself. I guess I'd probably be from one of the stations we know nothing about like Hydro or Tesla. It would be cool to be from Mecha but I'm not a mechanical person in the slightest lol.

2. What would you get arrested for on the Ark?

Probably theft. I'm not a thief in real life but I do like eating and comfort and I'm p. sure the only way to get anything above subsistence-level rations on the Ark is to do some law-breaking.

3. Would you take off your wristband when you landed on the ground?

I'm too much of a rule-follower to do it on my own but I would definitely be a sucker for Bellamy's "take off your wrist band as payment for some delicious puma meat" plan. To heck with this silly piece of metal, I want to eat.

4. What would the necklace Finn would make for you look like? (Clarke: deer/Raven: a raven duh..)

Some sort of large cat. Or small cat, not picky.

5. If you could resurrect any MINOR character who would it be?

If Wells counts as a minor character, then Wells. Otherwise...perhaps M'Benge. He looked like a promising delinquent.

6. Create a squad of 5 characters to go on missions with. Who are they?

Bellamy, Clarke, Raven, Jasper, and Monty. This is partly practical--I do think they're the smartest/most capable members of the group--but also partly about the Narrative. They're my favorites.

7. What Grounder Clan would you belong to you?

I guess Trikru based on where I live? Or again, some clan we know nothing about. I don't know anything about Trikru's non-warriors so perhaps I could be one of them.

8. What would your name be in Trigedasleng? (example: Octavia=Okteivia…just make it up!)

Skipping this one because I don't give my real name or any variants online, sorry.

9. Thoughts on Finn? Some people hate him, and others love him, so I’m curious

Okay. My general thought on Finn is that he had an appropriately sized role in the narrative--which is more than I can say about a lot of other characters, many of whom, imo, were either killed too early, or too late/not at all when they should have been, or who take up way too much screen time, or are given way too little for their worth. But Finn contributed decently well to the first season--sometimes oddly, in that, once he outlived his usefulness as a love interest, he was shoe-horned into a Peacemaker role that probably should have been Wells's. But at least he was contributing a needed and consistent POV. And while I go back and forth a bit on how realistic I find his season 2 breakdown... I think it is more realistic than not, at least narratively. He seems like the sort who would have a breakdown after a battle, and the short timespan of 2A makes it more likely, not less, to me, that he would spiral quickly into something so atrocious: no time to cool down, to get perspective, to heal. Also, he had a completely unique story, which is also pretty rare on a show that likes to reuse its plot points. (Sorry! It does though.) I can also honestly say that Finn's death and funeral still ranks as one of the most resonant and heartbreaking moments of the series, for me. I have a hard time with any sort of capital punishment story line usually but I really felt for this one and I think it was very well done.

So basically what I'm saying is that I think Finn was decently well used as a character--like B+ narrative role, docked for the random interest in peace and the occasionally annoying nature of his personality. Because he could be annoying. He and Clarke didn't have much chemistry and he and Raven had surprisingly little, too, given how important they allegedly were to each other. And one of the good aspects of his death was that, not only was the event itself well-constructed and moving, but he wasn't exactly missed, by me or by the story, after he was gone. He served his purpose. I'm glad he wasn't on the show longer. (Except for that post speculating on a Finn/Murphy redemption arc/love story, which I would have watched and cheered on for sure.)

I don't hate him, though, and it does annoy me a little that he almost always shows up in fic as the 2d villain, the shitty ex/boyfriend, the annoyance. I mean, I get the appeal of having a readily available character like that (ngl I've used him that way at least once myself) but like.... it's not my fave trope, let's put it that way.

10. Be honest. How willing would you have been to take the chip without knowing all the horrible things it does?

I've thought about this some, not so much as it pertains to me, but in comparison to some other Failed Utopia plots in other fiction, and because my sleeping beauty au involves Clarke taking the chip, and it was very hard for me to bring her to a place where I felt like she could realistically, and in an in-character way, make that choice. But it's also been a while since I watched S3 and it's difficult for me to remember at what point different aspects of the CoL became obvious to the characters. Certainly, I can see the appeal. I think anyone can. It's an interesting concept and one I actually wished had gotten more time in the show... I think anything that obviously perfect (live forever in a wonderful city, away from pain and death and hardship!) should immediately cause warning bells: what's the catch here? Taking the chip without knowing the answer to that question is an assumption of the risk sort of situation, except you can't predict what the risk is, and the stakes are enormously high. Not exactly smart, and I like to think I am smart. I also have a great fear of AI and VR, which would make me wary.

On the other hand, I'd do poorly in the impoverished landscape of the post-apocalypse, which might make the chip more tempting. Also, if ALIE and friends tortured me or someone I loved, I would take the chip like that. No question, I am weak.

11. What character do you relate to most?

I relate to the intensity of Jasper's feelings, and to Monty's method of shutting down emotionally as a survival mechanism.

Generally I wouldn't say I have much in common with any of the characters, though, and I don't really watch because I 'relate' to anyone, personally.

12. What character do you like the least?

My first instinct is to say I dislike a lot of the characters, which is true but... I also spend almost no time thinking about the ones I dislike. My fandom experience at this point is very much about retreating into the aspects of the show/canon/fanon I like, and ignoring everything else. That said... probably M/di and J/rdan because the whole concept of a Next Generation down from the delinquents offends me, and also because they're both so universally loved that it's quite hard to avoid them. Also b/c J's name corresponding to that of my fave character makes blacklisting really obnoxious lol.

13. Describe your delinquent outfit. (Would you wear something like Murphy’s jacket with the spikey red shoulder patch or have a trademark like Jasper’s goggles? Be creative, yet practical)

Mmm, something comfortable. A nice jacket, like Clarke or Bellamy's S1 jackets, or Jasper's pilot jacket. Nothing with weird patches like Murphy's S1 or Jasper's S3 jackets. A shirt with something interesting written on it like Jasper's Earth Day shirt. Big boots. A nice heirloom necklace. Multiple layers. Knitted wristlets like Clarke has in early S1. A sweater with thumb holes like Monty has in S4.

14. Favorite type of mutant animal?

All the mutants! I really feel like the show missed some good opportunities in the irradiated-animal department. Take some $$$ from the explosion budget, or the Boring Side Character payroll, and invest in some more two-headed beasts. But if I had to pick one, I'd say Lincoln's two-faced horse, because the image of him saving Clarke and Finn in late S1 is so underrated but so iconic.

15. What would your job be on the Ark?

I don't think I have many useful Ark skills. Archivist, perhaps? Member of their proto-justice system? Probably that, though I don't know what sort of jobs, specifically, make up that unit. Though I have some ideas; see: a fic I haven't yet actually written.

16. Would you have willingly pumped Ontari’s heart if Abby asked?

Gross. But probably if I had to, I'd force myself to.

17. If Lexa wasn’t Heda, but she was still alive then who would have made the best commander?

I gotta tell you, I literally do not care, nor have I have ever cared, about the commander or Grounder leadership in the slightest. They all seem pretty incompetent. They should cede their power to the Sky People, who are marginally less terrible at running things.

18. How would you act if you ate the hallucinogenic nuts like Jasper and Monty?

You'd never know from my obsession with alternate states but I have never been high, nor intoxicated in any way, so I really can't say. Hopefully calm and happy like M'Benge in the broom closet. But probably miserable and confused and afraid of my inability to corral my thoughts.

19. How would you have dealt with Charlotte’s crime? A more John Murphy approach or Bellamy Blake approach?

Interesting question. I actually think the Charlotte story line was one of the best of S1, probably the show as a whole, and I kind of wish it had played out more long term, instead of just being, in retrospect, more of an excuse for some drama. I mean that is one of the central dilemmas of a new society, as the dropship camp was starting to be at that time: what do you do with people who break the rules and/or are dangerous? They had roughly three options: execute the wrongdoer (which eliminates the problem pretty efficiently, if brutally); ignore the issue entirely through immediate forgiveness; or apply some punishment in between, like imprisonment. This situation in particular was more complicated because, first, technically, they had 'no rules' at the time (killing is just, uh, obviously wrong), second, the actual perpetrator was a child, and third, she was so obviously unstable as to seem a likely continued threat. And in addition to all THAT, Bellamy and Clarke were such tenuous leaders (Clarke wasn't really a leader at all, so really I should say Bellamy was a tenuous leader) that any option that didn't go along with the will of the majority could cause a complete break in legitimacy. So it's really a delicate scenario. One I can't say I have an answer to.

I will say I think banishment is literally the worst thing they could have done, for either Murphy or Charlotte, if she had lived, and I think the narrative bears this out. It looks like a good compromise but it's cruel and it's dangerous. Cruel because they have to assume the banished person would die in the wilderness, and if you believe he deserves death, shouldn't you just execute him? Have the courage of your convictions? Take on the full moral weight of your decisions? A hanging death is probably less awful than slow starvation or being eaten by a wild animal. And dangerous because if he doesn't die, he's an obvious target for...who's that? Your enemies in the woods? Which is exactly what happened? They brought that whole bio-weapon story line on themselves, tbh. I think it was an in-character decision for a couple of dumbass kids, but that's not the same thing as saying it was smart.

I like to think I would have sided with Bellamy early on, in being careful about what information goes out to the camp as a whole. I mean, it's not perhaps the most moral decision, but it's practical--and certainly inciting a riot, as Clarke ended up doing, is neither practical nor moral, so there's that. If the actual perpetrator had been found before Murphy was caught up in the mess... I guess some sort of middle-ground punishment is the best you can do. Imprisonment, shitty work shifts. Showing consequences for bad actions and trying to keep the group safe. Hopefully if there was enough tact in the beginning of the process, the crowd could be convinced to go along with it. I don't know, though. It's tough.

20. Who should have been the Chancellor, if anyone?

Bellamy.

Bellamy, Bellamy, Bellamy.

Honestly, watch the first season, or even, arguably, the first three, and tell me that ultimately becoming Chancellor wouldn't be a neat, logical, and emotionally satisfying conclusion for Bellamy's arc.

Obviously, it would take him some time to get there. Before then... I don't know. If I had to pick among one of the former Chancellors, I'd go with Abby I suppose.

21. Would you have been on Pike’s side like Bellamy or on Kane’s side? Or Clarke in Polis?

Oh gosh they're all terrible lol. I guess I'd pick Kane as the least of the three evils. He certainly was in the right once Pike's anti-Grounder agenda went into play, but I don't exactly think he had the ear of the people prior to the election, which is why I'm not enthusiastic. But, still. You gotta get through the Dark Times to get to Chancellor Bellamy, I guess.

22. Mount Weather had a lot of modern commodities. (example: Maya’s Ipod) What is the one thing you would snatch while there?

I'd grab up some interesting books. Possibly a stuffed animal because I like soft things. A nice piece of art.

23. What would your Grounder tattoos look like? Hairstyle? War paint?

Lol I don't care what universe we're in, I'm never getting a tattoo. Hair: probably something simple and loose. War paint: pass, as I wouldn't be a warrior.

24. Favorite quote?

I suppose Jasper's quote about wounds needing to heal before they become scars.

25. If all of the characters were in the Hunger Games, who would have the best shot at winning?

I've never read or watched the Hunger Games but I'm nevertheless going to say Raven. She's just been the deus ex machina too many times.

26. Least favorite ship? Favorite canon ship? Favorite non canon ship? NOT INCLUDING CL OR BC OR BE

Least favorite: M/rper

Favorite canon: ummmmm idk not excited by most canon ships tbh. Probably Jasper/Maya, maybe Mackson or Briller.

Favorite non-canon: Jonty

27. A song that should be included in the next season? If there had to be another guest star like Shawn Mendes on the show, who would you want to make a cameo?

HUNGRY LIKE THE WOLF DURAN DURAN

Lol, Idk. Something poppy and 80s would amuse me, though. In part because the show needs to take itself at least 75% less seriously.

I don't have any opinions on cameos.

28. What would you do if you were stuck in the bunker with Murphy for all that time?

Hopefully make friends with Murphy.

29. You're an extra that gets killed off. How do you die?

Something painless and quick?? I don't know. Poison?? Nice dramatic non-bloody death?

30. A character you’d like to learn more about and get flashbacks of?

JASPER. OBVIOUSLY.

...Lol I think this question is really about plausible character flashbacks and if so.... well first off ANY flashback about the Ark is 100% my thing, and flashbacks about almost any delinquent would be great. We're still not in the realm of the plausible, though, imo.

Raven, perhaps? Always want more Raven.

31. A character you’d bang?

Raven. Even though she'd intimidate me a lot.

Monty (as an adult, ofc).

A lot of the characters are bangable tbh. Might be faster to name those I wouldn't...

32. Would you stay in the Bunker? Go up to Space? Or live on your own in Eden?

Uhhhh none of the above??

I suppose the bunker. (This answer is based on the concepts of bunker/space/alone on Earth, not what actually happened in S5.)

33. In the Bunker, would you follow Octavia? What would you do to pass the time underground?

Read a lot and make friends. Idk if I'd follow Octavia since I just don't have enough data on the season... but from my understanding of her recent arc, probably not.

34. What crime would you commit in the Bunker that lands you in the fighting pits?

???

35. Up in Space, who would you bond with first? Who would be the most difficult for you to get along with?

I wouldn't last a year in space with such a small group of people but hopefully Raven and I would hook up before I spontaneously expired.

36. How long do you think you would last on Earth by yourself?

Definitely less than a year.

37. When the Eligius ship lands what do you do?

Eligius ship? I don't know her.

38. Favorite Eligius character? Least favorite?

???

39. Would you Spacewalk?

No. But actually. Probably yes. I'd totally freak out about the idea, swear a million times I'd never do it, then get cajoled into trying by my beautiful girlfriend Raven, and I'd love it so much I'd immediately want to do it again.

40. Would you prefer to eat Windshield Bugs, Space Algae, or Bunker Meat?

Algae?

41. Would you start a war for the last spot of green on earth? What would your solution be to avoid it?

There's no way I'd make it this far in the narrative in real life. I didn't even get there in fictional life.

42. Would you rather dig out flesh-eating worms or stick thumb drives into bullet holes?

I guess the thumb drive thing sounds less disgusting.

43. Are you willing to poison your sister for the Traitor Who You Love? What would you do to stop Octavia?

I don't have any siblings (well, no siblings with whom I have a real sibling relationship) so, yeah, sure, why not lol?

44. Would you go to sleep in cryo or stay awake like M/rper?

Leave my body behind on Earth, please, where it belongs.

45. Who are you waking up first to explore the new planet?

New planet? I dunno what that means lol.

[thedepthsremember]

TRR 3.21: “Taken” aka ten minutes before this chapter dropped I woke up abruptly so I was shaky from adrenaline LET'S DO THIS

Ahhhh we're starting off with the SAD MUSIC oh boy :( 

Ah yes. We are definitely kidnapped. IF Y'ALL HURT MAXWELL I AM BURNING YOU TO THE GROUND 

This place is giving me flashbacks to the dungeons in Dragon Age: Origins. Where’s my dumbass buddy Jowan? god I really have a type huh

Wassup, Anton? Oooo he got a new outfit! He kinda looks like a priest with my glasses off.

I'm gonna put my glasses on.

My skin crawls hearing him describe Olivia as his wife. Olivia agrees and threatens dismemberment. Stab him, STAB HIM GIRL

The people love me, he can't make me a martyr and expect the people to just go with it. 

He disregards this. But he honestly likes Riley, which I guess is...….. nice... But not worth much since he’s still trying to murder her and everyone she cares about. :////

Also hurts to hear him say that in front of Maxwell who honestly liked Justin. :/ Maxwell just kinda. quietly sad in his corner. 

Liam's coming for us, and sounds like they've got Gladys locked up, now that she's done playing her part. Oh dear. I’m betting diamond choice for if we get her out or not.

Wassup Claudius. So this is the SOB who shot Drake (and almost me).

As a Hufflepuff and admittedly a bit removed from the situation, I remain more offended that he shot my friend than me. Riley doesn't share my feelings and is still rather personally offended. 

Sure, remove your mask from your face so I can punch it. 

Oh he's older than I thought he’d be. Hello jerk Zaeed. 

Do I defend Drake or do I insult his dumb face. Ughhh fine I'll be slightly more mature, I bet it’s cooler anyway. [it is]

Yep. Here's what this whole story comes down to. Are Liam's emotions his strength that's going to make him the King who’s right for Cordonia, or a weakness that'll doom us all?

If you have any doubt, you haven’t been following along. (But it’s fun to worry about it anyway.)

Claude: *calls Olivia a shrew*

SHREW?? SHREW MOTHERUFCKER ESCUSE ME I am about to rip myself free from these ropes and scratch out your eyes.

Ooo TCATF reference~ (this is like the only one I’m going to catch, I’m only 2 chapters in)

Olivia’s trauma conga line continues. :( God, it hurts me to think about how she grew up trying to live up to her name and her parents’ legacy, and of course loving them and wanting to know more about them... and now the more she finds out about it the more it only hurts her. 

Way back in chapter 10, if you ask Olivia’s aunt what Olivia’s parents were like: 

Sorry I just had to drag someone down that road with me to know what I was thinking about when...…. 

OLIVIA CALLED ME HER FRIEND. HER ONLY FRIEND. (sorry Liam you're out I'M IN) I'M HONESTLY CRYING HARDER THAN FOR THE WEDDING.

ahhhhhh, she’s just come so far. 

Anton gets in close to gloat. Idiot is in HEADBUTTING RANGE and I am TAKING IT. 

DON'T YOU FUCKING TOUCH MAXWELL DON'T YOU DARE 

THEY KNOCKED HIM OUT. OLIVIA FIND ME A SWORD, NOTHING WILL SAVE ANY OF YOU NOW. 

They leave us alone. Olivia says this isn’t how she expected the evening to end. Considering it is Riley’s wedding day, I have to say she had a fairly different idea of how she wanted this night to go as well. 

Yes Olivia, mediate on the image of PUNCHING ANTON'S STUPID FACE in a nice lovely field with a breeze. :) :) :) ahhh. relaxing.

(If you panic instead, MC cries that they’ll never kiss their LI or wear another fancy hat again!!! Olivia is unmoved by our nonsense.) 

Riley remembers her Cinderella roots and considers asking the mice for help chewing through the ropes. Dude, you’re trapped with Olivia. In this dress her earrings are knives. I think we'll be okay.

It is possible to mess up the escape real bad and get Olivia stabbed twice before you leave. It is hilarious, but throughout this whole thing my best efforts never got Riley killed. Bummer. 

MAXWELL'S OKAY!!! excuse you Olivia, this display of affection is totally necessary, did you not see the soulmate point. The game agrees with me.

Nggghh we have to solve a riddle to get outta here. Or else deadly traps. "The best offense requires a personal touch...” Shield because heraldry? But also like all Nevrakis stuff is stabbing, but here our only option is a sword and not knife. Uhhhhhhhhh ok sword.

Holy shit I did it! 

[Even if you mess up and hit all the options, the traps mostly stab at you a bit. Nobody actually dies. Bah.]

But if we did... How awkward. They come down to take us to mock Liam and we’re dead already. ‘mmm yes this is uhhh exactly as planned.’ 

Hey it's the lighthouse background! NIKOLAI WE'RE COMING FOR YOU Oh wrong book.

GLADYS?!!! Guys it’s Gladys! Wait uh no i’m not happy to see her. She tarnished my Rogue Leader title. 

*sighs* ........Guys I am such a fucking sap. I've forgiven her already. It's ok just like, stop using the sad sprite. 

THAT’S RIGHT YOU MADE MAXWELL SAD sympathy retracted.

My priorities are so messed up, guys. What even.

*sighs* Ok Gladys, just take us to the weapons.

If she stabs me in the back again, I deserve it at this point. 

“Olivia is it just me or does this look like your armory?” Yes guys, it is the Same Background.

Aww Gladys. It’s about what I thought. You got a crap deal and were very foolish and trusting about finding a way out of it. She didn’t even realize she was working for Anton. This was dumb and you're still super fired but I can’t really be mad. 

It’s a good look at how wacky nobles with their silly obsessions can actually hurt people without thinking about it. You’re in a position of power, you’ve gotta think about more than yourself. 

Looking at the different playthroughs, each of the LIs chooses a different weapon. Maxwell got a fancy knife (it kinda looks like it swings from the handle?? wild). Hana gets the double-bladed sword (hot). Drake picks up a sword (and they mention his duel with Neville). Neat detail. 

EYYY Olivia picked the pretty dagger that iirc looks like the one I used to open champagne at the Beaumont Bash :D bestiesssss 

....Damn. This means I can’t use it. I personally also prefer either the small stabbables or a bow, but I considering the boutique battle, I guess Riley's style is more swing vigorously. Axe it is! The other ones are too heavy and I’d probably be more likely to hurt myself than someone else honestly. 

Riley finds your weaponry expertise hot, Olivia. Maxwell probably does too. 

…...Oh my god for a minute I thought Olivia was going to stab Gladys in front of me.

I'm doing what's probably the dumb thing and letting her go to cause a distraction but WHELP. Gotta stay true to my brand. i just wanna trust!!!!

Gladys pulls through and keeps guards away from us! I hope she’s okay. [oh my god wait do we ever find out what happens to her??? Gladys??????]

(If you don’t let her go, you see a guard and accidentally almost stab your friends but there isn’t really danger. boooo)

speaking of friends IT’S DRAAAAKE AND HANAAAAA

MY BUDDIES MY GOOD DUDES ♥__♥ *GRABS BOTH OF THEM AND CRIES* 

LIAM YOU BIG.... DUMB.... GRYFFINDOR 😭 He’s gone off BY HIMSELF to stall Anton while Hana and Drake try to find us. Clearly none of them trust the king’s guard and who can blame them. but GOD I AM STRESSED. 

Anton: 'you want to see the hostages? Well uh I... would too, fuck where are they. Guysssss who was watching the hostages D:'

CLAUDIUS DON'T YOU TOUCH LIAM WITH YOUR FILTHY DRAKE SHOOTING HANDS 

Olivia says to wait for the right moment. Uh Olivia is now the moment LIAM'S GONNA GET HIMSELF SHOT

goddddddd he really doesn’t care if he dies as long as it gives us time to get out. L I A M

……… I just realized, if we hadn’t already freed ourselves and Hana and Drake were still looking for us, Liam would’ve definitely gotten himself killed. NO

Oh man Olivia and I vaulting over the banister, weapons in hand, dresses trailing behind us........ What an image 😍

Wh. Why. How could you make me choose who to help WHY I CRY

Ok we're going with Maxwell but if ANY OF THE REST OF YOU ARE DEAD I'M GOING TO BURN CORDONIA TO THE GROUND

“THIS ONE’S FOR RILEY. AND THIS ONE’S ALSO FOR RILEY.” God I love him. I’d be willing to bet that doesn't even change if you're not romancing him either. [I looked it up and it doesn’t! he is so ride or die]

Anytime Riley or Maxwell call each other partner my heart swells and I want to die. ♥

ANTON PULLS A GUN AND MAXWELL JUMPS IN D: Flashbacks to Maxwell being sad he couldn't protect us at the Homecoming ball like Drake did. Noooo baby you don't gotta 

Maxwell: [john mulaney voice] THAT’S MY WIFE!

If we get outta here you know he’s doing that all the time. 

Riley jumps in AND --- what she doesn’t chop Anton's arm off with her freaking battle axe? i guess she didn’t wanna get too gory while she’s wearing white. i mean. knocking things over on him works too.... i guesssss

Riley: AND STAY DOWN Anton: [immediately gets up] Riley: …..godddd dude learn to listen.

What kind of.... secret fighting dance move nonsense is this :'D 

[Drake voice] self defense and dancing aren’t all that different! 

Friends team up and talk the goons out of fighting us. Goons sense we are ANGRY and HOPPED UP ON WEDDING CAKE and VENGENCE and are prepared to BITE OUR WAY OUT OF HERE IF NECESSARY. 

Fukkin Claudius is still here and Drake …… recognizes his voice or something, I’m guessing. 

(dramatic inner monologue about how Drake probably hears that voice in his nightmares when he flashes back to that night... oh no) 

Hell yeah DRAKE REVENGE HEADBUTT!!!

Part of me deeply appreciates him being more vengeful for himself (who actually got shot) than me (who got scared but not at all shot). Everyone here cares about me way too much. 

WHOA

NO

YOU DO NOT STAB OLIVIA ON MY WEDDING DAY ABSOLUTELY NOT D8 

IF YOU CAN BREATHE YOU CAN STAND

AND IF YOU CAN STAND YOU CAN FIGHT

TEARS

(sidenote since I’m pretty sure like. everyone picked that option (and you should it’s hella good), but if you pick “You can’t kill her you need her!” Anton muses that he can just say you did it, and he can get sympathy points from the public for avenging his dead wife. he’s the fucking worst god stab him already Olivia THANKS YOU DID GREAT)

Olivia: “Riley, I’m hurt...” oh god the fact that she’s even admitting that …….. my eyes just won’t stop leaking. 

Oh god ALL these one liners are so fucking good AUGHHHH can I just say them all in succession as he's being dragged off????

YOUR PUN LEVEL IS NOTHING AGAINST MAXWELL, FAKE JUSTIN. NOTHINGGGG

~~~~~VICTORY GROUP HUG~~~~~~

Olivia is horrified by this show of affection. Drake, unwilling group hug veteran, comforts her.

This is all very touching but I wonder who Olivia's bleeding on. It had better not be me. We should probably get her medical attention.

HEY LOOK IT'S THE KING’S GUARD late as always.

I think it's all those edits but I cant help interpreting Liam's neutral face as sarcasm now. ‘Yes Bastien. We're here and fine :| So nice of you to show.’

Nah Bastien, screw propriety, you go ahead and yell at your foolish king. You can be his dad now. He at least should’ve had some kind of backup plan.

Honestly I’m thinking Bastien’s gotten so rusty not having to watch out for Leo that sneaking away was probably super simple for Liam.

Whelp, back the party! 

Awwww Reginaaaa ;-; Liam YOU JERK IF YOU DIED YOU WOULD HAVE LEFT HER ALL ALONE

Well. Alone with Leo. ...well. 

BERTRAND IS HUGGING US BOTH. ON PURPOSE. THIS DAY IS SO BLESSED. 

My dog! hi baby!!!! 

I am a sucker for every time they pull the “who’s a good boY!!!??” ":o?” “IT’S YOUUU” god I love doggos. 

Hell YES THIS IS THE TIME FOR DANCING. It’s called a victory dance for a reason. 

Drake just said the words "Maxwell is right." While smiling. what even is this day

We get some pairs interacting! 

Penelope and Kiara are always the best :D 

neville is like still fukkin here for some reason??? roast him madeline 

Regina and Olivia share a nice moment :) 

Olivia is still bleeding and annoyed about it. Olivia..... babe........ maybe like....... lie down a bit.............

Team Riley has another sweet moment~~~ 

Ok this is all very nice but Riley has gotta be getting tired and she still needs to bang Maxwell to within an inch of his life. When is that happening. 

FINALLY Madeline comes up like “hey ok I’m resigning my position as your official cockblocker, go, leave.”

girl ARE you serious. Are you. I GOT KIDNAPPED PROBABLY BC YOUR COCKBLOCKING SHENANIGANS WORE MY GUARD DOWN, AND NOW HERE YOU COME ok you know what I'm taking it

Riley: *GRABS MAXWELL AND THROWS HIM OVER HER SHOULDER* BYEEEEEE

Finally alone!!!! bless 

You have the option to succumb to giggles or tears or jump in his arms, and while I picked laughter because this whole thing is absurd as hell if you go for tears, he is very comforting and he gets many points for that. ♥

whelp, here they go. (this isn’t going to get detailed, don’t worry/sorry) (lol)

Different music than normal! It's the sexy club track instead of the '😏 yee we're getting busy 😏' ones. I like it! Sets the tone for this very well, it's celebratory! We are well past anyone needing to be seduced. In one option Maxwell jokes he's glad you guys got advance practice in (lol), and the difference here does show. Neither of them are trying to impress each other, this is pure culmination of 'I love you, I want you, we went through hell for this, get over here.'

I appreciate that even though Maxwell likes to be on top, every time he brings them to the floor or here with the couch, he cushions her fall. Sweet as hell. 

He's back in his fucking jeans I can't djdjjfjgjgjg 

if they’re so determined not to make him one with boxers, at least get one with the fancy pants. It doesn’t even have to be the same fancy pants, just like. try slightly harder. 

There's no way I was wearing that bra under that dress. 

Ok this recap is going to fade to black here.

...

Maxwell, I know we’ve got to work on your self-esteem, but you can’t give me credit for the sex, it’s a team effort. (and let’s be honest it kinda seems like he does most the work. Not that I’m complaining.)

Maxwell, whilst being adorable, accidentally flings his ring off and freaks out. Don’t even worry about it man, do you know how many rings I’ve just left on sinks in public bathrooms? I was happy with the dang twig 

.............he got 

he got us ROSES im

Mmdmmfmdn

this almost makes up for that dirty trick  they pulled on us at the beginning of book 2. 

Did

He

Write us a poem???

Flowers and champagne and mood lighting... babe it’s like you're about to propose all over again.

ok it was not a poem but it was...……………...very good and destroyed me

G o o d b y e  I love him so much

I want to physically fight the entire Cordonian court for making him think he wasn’t worth it. 

The amount of self-depreciating things he says with a smile on his face is.... unacceptable. 

Luckily he has Riley now and she’s damn well going to spend the rest of her days helping him build up that confidence he deserves. 

this entire scene is my cause of death. it’s been an honor and a privilege. 

♥♥♥

♥♥

♥

actually

speaking of 

the logical part of my mind felt like 3 books was a good place to bring the story to completion, but now that it’s becoming a reality...……… I’m not ready. :( 

[bunnythemonsterlayer]

The White Rabbit

Because I have been dragged back into WATCHMEN fandom Hell and @social-justice-waterbender wanted it, I dug up the corpse of my vigilante’s profile I wrote up almost 10 years ago for a WATCHMEN AU and edited it so the timeline worked and actually made some lick of sense.

If anyone has further questions about her they can totally ask but here’s the jest of what was in the document I found all prettied up. Enjoy

General

Identity: Alice Darlene Early

Alias: The White Rabbit

Years in Service: 1966 – 1977, 1985

Born: September 12, 1945

Died: November 2, 1985

Relatives: Ernest Early (father, deceased) and Cynthia Grant (mother)

Affiliation: Former Crimebusters member

Base of Operations: New York City

Status

Alignment: Good

Identity: Secret

Citizenship: American

Marital Status: Single

Occupation: Former waitress at Mr. Charles's Diner, Saboteur

Characteristics

Gender: Female

Height: 5'8”

Weight: 150 lb

Eyes: Brown

Hair: Black

Race: Mulatto

Origin

Universe: WATCHMEN AU

Place of Birth: San Fransisco, California

Place of Death: Antarctica

Skills: Acrobatics (Gymnastics), Martial Arts (Defensive, Fall Recovery) Charisma (Morale Boosting), Mechanics (Fix-it, Disassembly), Thievery, Medical Knowledge (Basic First Aid), Acting

Advantages: Loyal, Quick Reflexes, High Stamina, Determined, Privileged Upbringing

Disadvantages: Impulsive, Emotional, Stubborn, Insecure, Attention Hungry, Secretive

Equipment: Pocket Watch, Trackers (2), Flash Grenade (1), Steel “Toed” Boots, Blast Resistant Visor, Audio Scrambler

Motivation: Upholding the Good/Thrill Seeking/Self Validation

Background

Born in San Francisco, California, Alice moved to New York in 1962 at the age of seventeen in the hopes of finding a place where she could get a different perspective on life and make something more of herself. After years of civilian living unable to think of an effective way to achieve her goal of self fulfillment, she made the decision to become a vigilante, using information she would overhear from customers she waited on during her job as a waitress. She teamed up with Rorschach and Night Owl II in 1966 after they begrudgingly allowed her to stay due to her constantly showing up and 'helping' them.

Outside of her vigilante lifestyle she had no contact with any of the other Crimebusters, only finding out their identities later after the Keene Act with the exception of Rorschach till his arrest in 1985. She did not reach out to any of them and as a result is the only vigilante to stay completely anonymous after her forced retirement.

Character

Alice is subdued and even headed compared to her vigilante counterpart. She treats people the way she wishes to be treated, believing that such behavior will prompt others to treat her the same way, even going so far as to give them the benefit of the doubt should they wrong her the first couple of times. Her reasoning being that everything is gradual and to expect things to instantly change is ignorant and foolhardy.

Being so far from home and often feeling alone, Alice will subtly cling to people she has regular contact with. Usually by catering to their needs and going out of her way to do things for them that will cause them to favor her positively. To further the pleasant image of herself, she is very secretive about her past and deeper feelings, fearing a negative response; something that can be attributed to her growing up in a Nuclear Family setting and having to keep up a certain image.

Fueled by adrenaline and anonymity, Alice's White Rabbit persona is extremely hyper active and allows her the freedom to express herself in ways she can't during her day job. Although the constant exuberance can be uplifting it more often than not leads to impulsive behavior, over stepping boundaries and a needless exhaustion of effort. A believer in never dying loyalty, White Rabbit will stick with her colleagues to the point of complete stubbornness even when it's to her detriment.

Out of costume, Alice shows no outstanding physical ability aside from being able to balance multiple objects such as trays of food during her waitress hours and lift her own weight to climb up things.

Politically Alice doesn't tie herself with any specific party, choosing to just go with what she feels is fair and just. However, due to growing up in California there are hints of subconscious leanings towards more liberal beliefs, though her level of patriotism boarders on pure nationalism.

In regards to her sexuality Alice appears to be heterosexual. Her attitude towards romantic conquest comes off as blasé and worrisome, not making any effort to even attract a mate. Reasons for this being the possibility of someone finding out too much about her, resulting in a broken heart and abandonment. This, however, coupled with her clingy tendencies usually ends up resulting in anxiety, mental exhaustion and distress when she does find herself developing feelings for someone. When pressed to describe her perfect man, Alice states that anyone is fine as long as he is a good man and someone she can be proud to stand by.

Costume

To keep her identity a complete secret The White Rabbit's costume has head to toe coverage, including a wig to conceal her natural hair color. Fashioned after the white rabbit from Alice in Wonderland, the costume consists of a visor, mask, tailored jacket, undershirt, gloves, high waist shorts and leggings that also act as her boots. The entire outfit is made by herself. The toes of her boots are fitted with solid steel toes designed to look like rabbit feet, which were meant to give a hand up for climbing and inflicting damage when delivering kicks. To further hide her identity, The White Rabbit fakes an exaggerated Northern Jersey accent on par with Betty Boop, meant to be distinctive and agitating.

Skills and Equipment

Having grown up with a stereotypical home life, Alice possesses skills in various gendered activities such as sewing, cooking, baking, dancing and penmanship with a plethora of knowledge in classic literature. School activities such as gymnastics and other light sports helped prepare her for her life as a vigilante helping hone her reflexes and reaction times as well as her ability to recover from falls. All her martial arts 'training' was taught to her by travel buddies she met on her way to New York, originally just starting out as a fun activity to do during pit stops. Realizing that she couldn't stand up against most men, she focuses on defense, evasion and using her opponents weight against them. These stops as well played a part in teaching her how to fix and disassemble things due to the many car issues that happened along the way. She often uses this knowledge to sabotage get away vehicles.

The visor over her eyes is made of a same material used for police riot shields, the origin of how she acquired such material is not something she's willing to reveal. It is solid enough to protect against a hard hit to the face and tinted enough to hide her eyes while giving her semi clear visibility. While able to buff and fix small chips and cracks in it, it would most likely be impossible to recreate if broken.

Her costume, contains no armor besides her visor and padded knees and elbows to break falls more efficiently.  

After teaming up Night Owl II gifted a number of things to assist her, including a reconstruction of her boot 'toes' to make them lighter and work in more efficient ways. Redesigning them to be separate parts instead of one solid piece allowed them to operate more like an actual foot, now giving them the ability to spread open for better balance.

Lacked a belt or anything for inventory carry, what little White Rabbit holds is either light enough to hook onto the waist band of her shorts or small enough to be kept in the breast pocket of her jacket. The 'tail' on the back of her costume is a small flash grenade to be used only as a last resort or quick escape. An audio scrambler is built into her pocket watch producing 5 minutes of interference to hinder calls for back up or keep surveillance mics from listening in on covert conversations. The trackers are standard and used to track targets.

Relationship with Walter Kovacs and Rorschach

The most influential person in Alice's life in New York, Alice met Walter Kovacs years before she became a vigilante. The diner she worked at was near his job and catered to many of the employees during the lunch rush. Walter would come every now and then to have coffee, food and sometimes read the paper. Their communication was sparse, only expanded through her own efforts to build a friendly connection with him as a regular customer. He was polite to her within his ability, eventually answering her in full sentences. It was only after her request for him to walk her home from the diner one day to avoid a heckling customer she worried would follow her that their relationship evolved in any way. With Walter being thankful that she was direct with her request and demeanor instead of trying to sweet talk him like other women. Pleasant, long conversation being proven possible, the two bonded and grew into being good friends.

Not aware they knew each other out of costume, Rorschach and White Rabbit would often get into small squabbles, spawning mostly from White Rabbit's too familiar attitude towards he and Night Owl II, giving them pet names like 'Rory' and 'Nighty', bumping into and touching them casually, as well as having a sense of humor in serious situations. Although this was explained as a way to lighten the mood and ease tension the behavior caused Rorschach to often become angry, accusing her of making a mockery out of their work. White Rabbit would often try to soothe him, but this only worked some of the time and more often than not end in Night Owl II having to break them up. Many nights ended in both parties being bitter towards each other. As time passed White Rabbit gained more experience in her vigilantism, gaining the two the ability to work together more smoothly even to the point of being able to go on patrol and stakeouts together without incident. It was at these times they'd talk about their motivations, eventually coming to an understanding. Some conversations would ironically consist of them talking about their encounters with each others day time alias's, oblivious to the fact that they were the same people.

As the years passed, it became clear that Walter's mental state was begining to deteriorate. Unaware it was his nights of vigilantism causing it, Alice began offering and request he spend time with her more frequently; hoping the interaction would help with whatever was troubling him. At this point however, watching the slow, descending sanity of someone she cared about happen right her eyes began to work against her own well being. Forced to come to terms with the fact that she indeed had strong, romantic feelings for someone, Alice weighted her options and in December 1974 she finally confessed how she felt to Walter. Trying to cushion the heaviness of her sudden admission, she quickly tagged on the reassurance that it was okay if he didn't feel the same way. She would later describe his face looking placid but his eyes looking terrified. In 1975, after not seeing Walter for almost a week, Alice went to the garment factory he worked at looking for him. When she asked to see him she was informed he had quit suddenly and they hadn't heard anything since. Not knowing his address or any way to contact him, Alice became inconsolable and sank into a sever depression.

At this point White Rabbit also began to notice a change in Rorschach's behavior. Becoming more brutal in his actions he started working alone more often and interacting less and less. After weeks of this environment and still wrecked with worry over Walter's disappearance, White Rabbit asked Rorschach for his help. Begging him through tears she gave him Walter's full name and former work place in the desperate hope of tracking him down. It was at this point that Rorschach figured out who White Rabbit really was, but continued to withhold his own identity. He agreed and told her he would look into it and to meet him in a couple of days. At their meeting place, Rorschach informed White Rabbit that he had found Walter and was 'alive' but refused to give any other details. Ignoring further pleading and tears, he left her in the spot, telling her to be satisfied with what she got and let Walter go.

In 1977 after the Keene Act was put into effect, White Rabbit refused to retire and continued to patrol the city. Working to stop what small crimes she could alone she as well tirelessly searched for Rorschach, who had refused to retire as well. When she found him in a fight with some local thugs she joined in to help him, suffering a blow to the face from a metal bat that shattered a large chunk out of her visor. After disposing of the criminals, White Rabbit confronted Rorschach, berating him for not asking for help. Insisting he couldn't handle the entire city on his own she assured him that she was there to help no matter what. Rorschach began to leave, coldly telling her that he didn't need her weighting him down, to which she grabbed him by the arm and demand he look at her and tell her what was wrong with him. A fight ensued, with White Rabbit demanding Rorschach accept her help, proclaiming that she wasn't going to retire as long as he stayed active as well. Finally grabbed her and staring her in the face, Rorschach ordered her to quit and go home, calling her by her real name in the process. Rattled and enraged by the fact that he never told her he knew who she was, Alice fought back harder against him, turning the entire affair into an all out brawl between them. No match for Rorschach but still refusing to abandon him Alice declaring he would have to kill her before she would leave him to die alone and cold. The fight was ended with Rorschach smashing her head into a wall, breaking her visor fully and concussing her. She plead for him not to do this, thinking of both Rorschach and Walter and who was going to take care of them if she couldn't before loosing consciousness and waking up in her own bed. The remains of her visor sat on her bedside table with a note reading 'Thank you for all you do' and bearing Rorschach's signature.

Dejected and without the use of her visor anymore Alice was finally forced to retire.

Rorschach refers to this event as 'the night the White Rabbit died', most likely as a way to continue to protect her anonymity.

The Events of Watchmen

Finding out that Walter was Rorschach via news report, Alice visits Walter in prison where she uses her audio scrambler to mask their conversation. She confronts him about never telling her who he was when he knew about her, to which Walter replies that it was for their own good. The meeting ends with Walter placidly confessing that he was fond of Alice long before finding out she was White Rabbit.

Although telling Walter and Long that she wouldn't be back, Alice still dons her vigilante costume again on Halloween night to try and get Rorschach out herself. Luckily coming in during the riot and Night Owl and Silk Specter's own rescue mission, White Rabbit gleefully joins them.

After loosing Silk Specter to Manhattan, discovering Veidt's plan, and Rorschach mailing his journal, White Rabbit finally asks Rorschach on the way to Antarctica to tell her what really happened back when he forced her into retirement. He tells her and apologizes in a less awkward fashion than he had with Night Owl. White Rabbit accepts his apology and reassures him “I won't let you die cold and alone. Well...alone at least. We are going to Antarctica.”

Death

White Rabbit witnesses the deaths caused by Veidt in his attempt to create a utopia. Everyone decides to keep it a secret except Rorschach who tries to leave and inform the world of the truth. White Rabbit loyally follows him and tries to assist him with getting the hoverbikes to work when they are stopped by Manhattan. Rorschach tells her to go back with the others to escape the price of trying to ruin Veidt's utopia, to which she refuses, repeating her promise to not leave him to die alone. Taking off her mask, White Rabbit seconds the prompting of Manhattan to kill them. Embracing Rorschach, their silhouette takes the shape of the Hiroshima Lovers before disintegrating.

[cpeacephoto]

A million years ago I met a wonderful person with a fantastic imagination. I had at the time an interest in that time in learning Latin so the idea of coming up with latin based nick names was neat.

My friend liked to draw. More importantly my friend processed her feelings, thoughts, conflicts of identity, and so on by drawing characters. Yes the characters were fiction, but the characters were also representations to them.  They were images of people who portrayed things like anxiety, lagging negative thoughts that you just can’t seem to shake off. When she felt like she wasn’t powerful, or seen, she drew characters that were powerful and seen. It became like a language. Seeing what characters where depicted, and how they were depicted, told you what my friend was thinking. Not in specifics but abstractly. That something was on their mind and it felt with rage, anxiety, depression, frustration, that sort of thing.

Like a lot of people I didn’t catch on right away. Too caught up in pretty images and “oh wow you can draw, that’s cool.” And the of course the asshole statement of “please draw me something”. Yes, I said that. Yes, it was wrong. But as time passed I’ve come to feel the drawings are a language. An intimate language. And I’ve come to enjoy reading that language as best as I can.

Sadly how we perceive ourselves is not how others perceive us. The man I think I am and how I describe myself is not how others seem to describe or see me. The character my friend created they created as a character for them. It was an impediment of themselves as a powerful force of nature. Someone who was tall, attractive, aggressive, and most of all heard. Someone who could do whatever they wanted and not worry.

The character is perceived by them differently than it is by me I’m sure. It’s why it’s their character I suppose. To me however the character was always a double edged sword. Because the character was also a little self-destructive. Willing to eat my friend alive if it thought it would serve their needs. The character for all of his alluring qualities of intellect, sexuality, power, and a little instability always seemed to have its own motives. And wasn’t afraid to do whatever it wanted to get it done.  Including burn people.

My character was created as someone stronger and more confident than I really am. More to the point my character was created with one very specific trait. One that is probably the only true trait. My character was created to be completely devoted and in love with their character. No matter what their character did.

As time has passed I’ve thought about these old kids characters. It means something different in adult life. The escapes of fantasy become far less frequent and the emotional or ideological representation they stand for become more apparent. The demon of anxiety wishing in your ear for example seems to be ever more prevalent to me.

So as I’ve aged I’ve found myself thinking about these characters more and more. I’ve been thinking about the language of the draws from artists I’ve not known in forever. And I think about how these things make me feel.

To me, the part of me that was my character still exists somewhere in my mind. I get to feel him at work when I lift heavy things or listen to loud angry music. But I always get ripped away to being me, this lumpy weird dude, whenever the real world is calling.

Her character to me is also in the back of my mind. Someone I think about when I listen to the right kind of music or visit particularly dark or solitary places. The character to me is alluring. She’s, perfection. She’s smart, she’s funny, she’s attractive, she’s powerful, she’s just a little weird. She stands as this haunting figure who likes to come about to me from time to time and whisper things into my ear. Sometimes what she whispers are sweet, and sometimes they are mean. She whispers how I’m not good enough, how I failed, how I’m hideous, how I’m a monster. And she has conversations about things like ago.

It’s sort of like depression. People think depression is just sadness all the time. Depression can really be anxiety, rage, frustration, and a few other things. Depression in a way is both a rival, and a friend. You know depression doesn’t necessarily have your best interests in mind all the time. But it does from time to time become useful, comforting, or just familiar. You form a bond with it and you grow to respect it.

This old ghost that just won’t seem to go away.

It’s had me thinking for some time I’d like to so a self portrait with the old character. I’d like to do with all done up with someone in demon horns and cosmetic contacts. In some sort of amazing sexy and weird outfit. I’d like to do a series where i just sort of sit there, emotionless, frumpy, looking at the camera. Meaning while character proceeds to interact with me even if I don’t seem to notice. Like scream at me, laugh at me, try to seduce me, lick my face, whatever. It’s always that sort of ghost that’s just off ear shot.

Sadly I haven’t been able to find the right person yet. For lots of reasons. Cosmetic contacts pose both a safety concern to source, and an expense. I’d need a model who would commit enough to make buying an outfit that would fit them worth the expense. And I’d have to find a model who would be willing to interact with me. And I haven’t found the right person for the job yet.

I have been able to do a few dry runs though just to get an idea for what lens length to use, lighting, that sort of thing. Popping horns on a girl doesn’t mean it’s the character or that it works out in the end. But for test shots I’m rather happy with some of these. If I ever find the right model I’d still love to do my shoot though.

[ohnohetaliasues]

Hey, this is the made up nation. While I am aware of the main problems of made up nations, I like to take challenges with what people see as instant Sues to see if it’s even possible to pull it off. Anyway, here she is, with my personal notes at the end. Thanks again!

Country Information:

Official Country Name: Commonwealth of Flurian Islands (Fluria)

Capitol: Gadleigh

Languages: Flurian, French, Mandarin (Government officials speak English)

Government: Monarchy, with a Prime Minister as the advisor to the ruler. (Working towards Constitutional Monarchy.)

 Human Information:

Name: Barvana “Vannie” Venata

Meaning: Barnava roughly translates in english to Fairy of the Stars. Venata roughly translates to Sun Storm.

Age Appearance: 26

Gender: Female

Birthday: June 13th. This is the day Espya, Ascon, and Rebrium unified into a single country.

 About Them:

Personality: As a country of islands, the best way to describe Barvana is to say that her personality differs, each one reflecting a different island. Like the people of Espya, she has a commanding presence, with a powerful voice and a strong stubbornness. Like the people of Ascon, she’s caring and gentle, but willing and ready to prove a point. And, finally, like the people of Rebrium, she’s loyal to a fault and silver tongued. Of course, all of these things come with their own strong downside, her stubbornness often blinds her, for example. Like her people, she’s very wary of strangers and outsiders, as well as slightly scared of the advancing technologies of the modern world.

Hobbies: Baking, sneaking about in the night, fishing, the occasional party (formal parties), sewing (by hand, thank you.)

 Physical Attributes:

Description: (Images) Barvana has a tanned skin complexion, a deep, natural tan. Her eyes are colored a dark blue, and are rather large. Her hair is a deep honey brown, it’s curly and she usually wears two small braids in it. Her left shoulder blade has a burn scar, presumed to represent the volcano eruption that wiped out Rebrium centuries ago, while on her chest, there’s heavy scarring from what looks like an animal attack. Her breasts are small, and barely noticeable.

Height: 5’3’’

Weight: 124 lbs

Outfit: Island Casual, Conference Meetings, Armored Combat, Modern Warfare, Military Commander’s Uniform (Use these as references, will be updating soon with rough descriptions/sketches of what she actually wears. These are to be used as my inspiration.)

 Family and Foreign Relationships:

England (Arthur Kirkland) England is one of the very few nations that have been allowed to trade with Fluria. Arthur and Barvana haven’t talked much, however, due to the grudge both of them are still harboring. China (Wang Yao) China was the first nation to gain the trust of Flurians and have trade opened up with the islands.Yao and Barvana share a positive relationship, she would even dare call them friends. (Roleplay only: Possible Love Interest) France (Francis Bonnefoy) Arguably, France is the nation that first discovered Fluria, landing on Rebrium centuries before the islands unified. They’ve opened up trading and share a positive relationship. (Roleplay only: Possible Love Interest) Jonathan Vesque Venata (Cecian) Cecian is a small island micronation closest to Ascon. The countries are close allies, Vesque and Barvana are brother and sister to each other. France ‘discovered’ Rebrium around the time when they owned the other two islands. The representative claimed they were already a single nation, though never got the chance to explain other nations to Fluria before he vanished. All images that aren’t in that sta.sh folder are to be used as references. As mentioned in the outfit, I’m using those as my inspiration. The history is a heavy WIP, I only have scattered ideas with no solid dates. This is a world map with a few ideas for where I’m thinking the nation itself is. Cecian is going to be fully developed after Fluria is finished. Or at least in a more finished state.

Brief History:

Fluria began as the three islands of Rebrium, Espya, and Ascon, each of which were very close to each other. The three islands had their own representative country for upwards of five hundred years, before wars broke out between them. The first war was between Rebrium and Espya, where the peoples of Rebrium won the war and took Espya as their own, before then warring with Ascon. The war ended with Rebrium owning the other two islands.

Two hundred years later, another war broke out, the people of the islands revolting against their oligarchy leaders. At the end of this long and bloody war, a treaty was made that would unite the three islands into one nation, which they would name ‘Fluria’. A name meaning Land’s Hope.

Barvana was found on the beach of Espya shortly after, staring out at the sea as the countries approached. The three would be disappearing soon, since their nations had united… And they knew it, they even knew who this chibi was. They tried to train her to become a good country, but they vanished shortly after the first king of Fluria was crowned.

Barvana herself, has led a simple life for her peoples. She began as a seamstress, apprenticing with an elderly woman who was happy to teach her, who later adopted her after finding out she had no parents. She assisted the woman for as long as she lived, before working on her own for almost 50 years, before taking on her own apprentice before leaving the trade. She tried archery, alchemy (as in mixing herbs together to make medicines, I need to check the actual name of it), and fishing before trying politics, and in the right moment too.

Roughly 74 years after she began her political ‘apprenticeship’, Chinese ships arrived on the shores of Espya. Barvana was on the beaches that night to greet them. Of course, a language barrier barred the discussion for a moment, before someone walked out from the ship, speaking a tongue Barvana was shocked she understood. This man explained it was the language of the countries, a secret language hardwired into their brains that only they could understand.

The conversation was long, spanning days. The visitors and the natives both believed it was to work out trade, but it was mostly just chatting about being countries. The Chinese left with Flurian goods, leaving a few items behind for the people of the islands. Since then, circa 1805, China and Fluria have traded with each other.

England was next to arrive, demanding gold and silver from the islanders. This time, however, they were not so diplomatic. Barvana greeted the country on the beach clad in chain-leather armor. They argued. They fought. Flurians defeated the British by sinking their ships and preventing them from leaving, using poisons to fell their generals. England begrudgingly surrendered… Accepting when Barvana demanded trading from him and his countrymen. She watched one of her own ships taking the British home.

Now, Fluria is a slowly advancing country. Barvana is scared but curious of the strange technology China and England bring, reaching towards it and quickly pulling her hand away when it makes sounds or lights up. Barvana has only recently started coming to World Conference Meetings, her first meeting seeing a terrified country walking in staring in awe at everything. She almost talked China’s ear off.

 Extra:

 Notes:

I'm used to awful made up OCs, but this isn't too bad. It doesn't interfere with any major relations, and I actually like this one! Good job!

~Kat