#so iDK but im scared of losing this forever now that i like it so. be it here. posted discreetly at night dont look

[aquickstart]

FARLEIGH No... No, you don't. You used it seven times. Oliver reddens. OLIVER No I didn't. FARLEIGH Yes you did. I counted.

[inmirova]

"it's easier to leave an abusive situation than it is to stop an abuser" :^( but it's not easy :^(

[nomairuins]

ill be like I can totally make a lighthearted post mentioning a kink i have and i wont even freak abt it. and then i freak abt it

[jaal-ama-daravv]

dissecting the emmrich romance scene (lich path)

dissecting the graveyard scene dissecting the alternate romance path dissecting the argument scene (lich path) mortal vs lich romance path emmrich x rook cinematic

Emmrich Volkarin - Dissecting the Lich Romance Scene fair warning you're in for an emotional rollercoaster

first, i wanna touch on this from our previous dissection (argument) -

"What if I can't bear that for eternity?" Oh, Emmrich. his entire soul aches over the inevitable future that awaits rook. i think this line is so important for emmrich because 'bear that for eternity" implies Emmrich will either, a) go rogue trying to bring rook back c) live with so much grief over his lost love it changes his soul forever in a dark, yet unknown way. and quite frankly, all of these are incredibly sad, and that just hurts. i thoroughly, full heartedly believe that there is no concievable way that emmrich just 'moves on' and 'accepts' the death of rook as previously stated in the lichdom scene. sry bioware, but youre wrong on that one as if he was 'fine' with it, he wouldn't of had a massive panic attack over rooks death and his grief. COUGH, the eternal flame. i could rant for hours and HOURS about how emmrich in the lich path is absoloutley devastating if rook were to pass on, because he is so compulsively, irrevocably in love with them. and not only is he in love with them, he has the love he has yearned for, for over 20 years. its huge for him which is evident given how both romance paths have him terrfied of how much he loves you.

Additionally, Emmrich grew up poor. This would impact his view on society and love. But more impactfully, it would impact his view on himself. His self-worth. Emmrich likely thinks he doesnt deserve this type of love. Hence the attempt to push Rook away and act over-suave at times.

anyway, to the SCENE -

immediately we are hit with this, to which Emmrich replies stating that he did it not to scare the citizens. what a load of huff. youll see why thats a straight deflective lie soon -

don't you worry handsome man, youre not alone emmrich expressing his fear of losing rook, and/or losing eachother, continues to be a major dynamic between these lovers

oh rooky, im so proud of you for opening up about your feelings. (remember the argument they had prior, it was fort knox up in here)

rook expresses clear fear and gratitude that they were able to escape the fade. I do believe that the line "I was afrad I'd be there forever" is a parrelle to emmrichs lichdom - as they would of spent eternity without eachother. hence why this next line, hurts so much -

the raw emotion, the crack in his voice when he says this line tells you everything you need to know. he is so grateful to have rook back with him. I do believe in this moment that emmrich has a moment of realisation of his love for rook, and just how immensed and attached he is with her. which is why he later vows that nothing will part them ever again, "not in this, nor any other world" (cough, soulmates). idk man, i have a feeling that emmrich would find rook's spirit in the fade (or any other world) if they passed on, and he'd never leave.

key point back to the lichdom decision scene -

man would go full blown rogue, scarlet witch rogue, i see it now.

I also want to touch on the "you're here with me" line. this, this is important considering what happens directly afterwards - remember how i mentioned desire a few posts ago? lets break it down, "you're here with me." Emmrich has held a consistent view throughout the whole romance that "its gratifying a fresh-faced adventure took any notice in me at all", does emmrich also possess the belief that the love he so dearly desired may not of been possible in his life time due to his age? i think so. which is why desire and the "wow, you're here with me" is so, so important. Now watch closely -

he looks defeated, ashamed - "why would someone like her be with someone like me? let alone, desire me."

the pose, how he is holding his chest and his body up against the coffin, the disbelief and sadness that is pained over his face. he is heavy with angst. this man wants rook, body and soul. he is SO in love with her. god my heart breaks typing this. he is so in love with her, but is so afraid that she doesnt want him now that he is undead - I will add in here to think back to when he was mortal, 3 flirts lines in total were regarding his looks. UGH, just stab me - ps the music in this scene rips out my heart, stomps on it, and shoves it back into my chest bloodied and bruised.

when rook touches him, his face unstiffens and his body relaxes. he looks at her nervously, but before he can address her or admit his pain, rook has NOTICED (YAY - take that argument scene rook) what is bothering emmrich, because she loves him so much, maybe even more, regardless of his undead figure. "You don't have to hide your face from me" is just a perfect way of phrasing that you are made for eachother. rook reassures emmrich of her undying love for him.

its that gomez and morticia dynamic, unwavering, obsessed dedication to eachother. a bond that strengthens the other. for emmrich and rook at least, theri dynamic is so strong I wholeheartedly believe the death of one, would break the mind and soull of the other.

there is so, so much emotion in this scene and most of it is written into the facial expressions and movements of the characters. watch how the fear of death becomes easier now that emmrich knows that rook loves him truly -

im not crying, you are -

this WRECKED me. because there is a slimmer of hope in his voice and particularly the words he chose. "I will let nothing part us again, my love" emmrich is a lich lord, with powers we dont understand just yet (cmon sequel with rook & emmrich), it is safe to say though that emmrich and rook would fight for and protect eachother to the death so that they may not be parted. This also takes me back to my original point of not letting anything part them, nothing - not even death. hence my belief that emmrich would do anything to find rook in the fade or any other world.

"Not in this nor any other world" - do i need say more? the hope seeps through, its not alot, but its there. don't get me wrong, he still has a crippling fear of death, but its, different. different in the sense that if rook was to pass or trapped somewhere, he would get them back and find his way to them, at all costs, one way or another.

the rest of the scene is very, very sweet and shows them being happy for the extra few hours they have together before facing untold danger - by either rook being able to see the fade through emmrichs eyes, or them boning again. actually i think both lead to boning.

this scene has me in absolute tears everytime I witness it because it is so powerful. it is hopeful. it is pure committment of their relationship and bond to eachother. combining this with the knowledge of the argument scene and having played through the mortal romance path, this - is extremely emotional.

Both romance scene are emotional and touching in their own regard - however, I do think the lich romance scene is more deep due to the dynamic. It is not about simply coming to grips with mortality, it is coming to grips with mourning your lover for eternity, and if you cant bear it for eternity, (which he wont, cmon) he is afraid. afraid of losing, rook. his heart. his dearest heart, and of losing himself because rook is, and I quote, "the most magnificent thing to ever happen to me."

mourn watch rook and emmrich are on a whole other level, and that level is something that is told in the minute details, the edging looks. the tone of voice. there is hope in this scene and a sense of overwhelming love and acceptance, but, there is also impending grief. which makes this story so real.

you can feel emmrich yearning for rook throughout the entire romance path because of the fated connected they share, in this and any other world. you can feel it. but this, in the lich scene? there is yearning, acceptance, hope, grief, joy, and melancholy all in one. without a doubt in my heart, these two, are made for eachother, in every world.

I shall break down the mortal romance scene next ♥ see you soon

[rindough]

!!!THIS HAS SOME SPOILERS SO FEEL FREE TO IGNORE THIS!!! Still life by Sitcom kinda reminds me of Aventurine or maybe it's because i have huge Aven brainrot and just pair him with one of the songs i like but the lyrics saying wanting to walk away from the chaos of life and into a peaceful landscape and also the lyrics "I walk into the distance until I become the distance" reminded me of the end cutscene in the story but again idk i just want to comfort him :')

oh my god this one YES ANON ykno when i played the trailblazer quest, it's just so wholesome whenever i see kakavasha and it gets bittersweet n melancholy everytime aven meets mini kakavasha. especially at the part by the black hole?? god now talking abt it i just wanna *balls fist with tears*

but i feel like aven is ALWAYS on edge, he doesn't show it but as he's granted with the luck to always win, he'll never know when will it be his final token to be a winner, he'll always and forever be on edge as he will never know when it's his turn to lose. and that uncertainty scares him, it makes him wanna run away and never look back, never have to fear creeping up on him or someone watching him, trying to have a glimpse of his so far yet so near downfall.

no matter how hard he holds to dear life on his chip, he knows he can never change what faith he has, he can never change god's mind if the god of sigonia ever decides to end his luck right then and there in the middle of a bet.

he thought he'd be able to live through that surge of adrenaline, that feel of giddiness... but over time, it all gets too tiring, too taxing for him to keep up. bet after bet, months after months, he feels like nothing, not even dr. ratio could pull him out of his misery. at this point there was no turning back. his life, his character, his label, it's all do-or-die, all YOLO written on it already.

a hug? i think he needs more than a hug, he needs to get a full on breakdown, weeks of crying, constant warmth and comfort, to let all of his fears be pulled inside out in order to feel safe again. to feel as if he's no longer needed to put himself on the edge of a knife anymore, no longer having to sacrifice himself anymore.

that's why i believe he did what he did at the end :( ok correct me if im wrong, it's been a while since that scene but... he wants most ties to be cut loose, he wants to be free and live according to his will.

[gracetoldmeto]

really long rant: why am i so scared of everything?

note: the rest of this post was a draft i made a few days ago, and was going to let rot forever, but today has messed me up so much i just said *why not* and posted bc idk... why not...

im not like 'BOO!!! jumpscare' scared just like... there are so many things in life that could go wrong that are entirely out of your control and theres absolutely nothing you can do about it, ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOTHING, because shit happens and sometimes that shit is BAD and permanently fucks you over for life and thats just the way it is bc fate is a game of chance (this is my dramatic ass way of saying 'a forever change') but everyone says "oh if you cant control it then why worry?"

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?

NO. THAT IS NOT THE POINT. THE POINT IS I DO WORRY.

I could die tomorrow. I could get a terminal diagnosis tomorrow. Someone (else) I love could die (again) tomorrow. Maybe my house could burn down tomorrow. Maybe in some freak accident everything I've ever known is taken from me... somehow?

can i control any of this? no.

so what do i do about it??? anything i can to minimize the fallout just in case...

bc isnt that just called RESPONSIBILITY???

ie: house fire? -> ok. insurance.

medical? -> insurance.

death? (that isnt mine) -> stable income

(note #1: this is about the point in my writing of this post where i dont even have the motivation to finish it bc i just wanna sit down and cry... but i might as well)

so OKAY, guess what? i did something about all those possibilities, so my anxiety should be relieved, right? fear gone! all okay now!

WRONG!

all that structure ive created bc its the "rEsPoNsiBLe" way to live, is a slow painful depressing death of my mental health at the hands of my job

yes, id rather gain an inch than lose a mile, small sufferings over large,

but oh my god is that all life is? small sufferings???

if i keep only suffering one inch at a time im going to end up killing myself and i dont quite think anyone truly GETS that except my therapist

this isnt like high school where i knew jack shit about mental health, i know what help is out there, whether or not it works is a totally different story

(note #2: i have looked at my options, ive read the rules, and id actually rather take my metaphorical little plastic car you get at the start of The Game of LIFE boardgame and throw it out a fucking window)

im past the point of easy help and unfortunately the conclusion i keep coming back to is a quote from a fic i wrote last year...

whatever THIS life is, regardless of how much i worked my ASS off for it, i dont want it anymore

(note #3: i dont even think id be in this spot if i didnt have shit luck)

i am equally fucked by either...

1) being responsible, financially safe, insured, but sad af at my job and actively praying something kills me in my sleep

OR

2) quitting my job with no plan and being scared that fate is gonna fuck me over for the upteenth time and this time i wont be able to bounce back or (lets be real) even have a want to (but thats a discussion for another time)

this is no way to fucking live, yet here i am

why am i scared of everything? well, yes i know WHY (bc from personal experience i know what can go wrong)

why am i scared of everything? because you cant be scared of something if you dont know it exists BUT in order to be prepared and responsible it means you have to acknowledge that YES IT CAN HAPPEN TO YOU

so how the hell am i supposed to be responsible when i hate what comes with it???

"hey alex, what do you wanna be when you grow up? (1) sad or (2) scared?"

actually neither, id rather simply not exist

why am i scared of everything? because how else am i supposed to act?

why am i scared of everything? because actually, there is no answer to this... there is no reason... its just another shit thing in life that iunno how to deal with

why am i scared of everything? because the universe said so and so thats how it is

and i fucking hate it

.

...ok thats all im gonna go make a quesadilla now

[jemmo]

rambles on that last twilight ending

my thoughts on the last twilight ending are so??? im gonna need to sit on this one for a while, bc i loved this show so whole-heartedly that i don’t want to write it off bc of a ‘bad ending’, but it also means it’s hard to reconcile that the ending was… well, i don’t think it was bad. i think it deserves more thought than that, but i don’t think it did what it wanted to, nor did it keep with what the shows message was, or should have been. and we can say it’s as simple as day shouldn’t have got his sight back, but I don’t think that was the only thing. if he stayed blind, the ending still wouldn’t have hit right for me. none of it hit right from the end of ep 11 bc it’s like I could feel the intent of the writing, but it’s not what the writing actually was. and if it was given maybe 3ish more episodes and all these characters were given more time, i think an ending like this could’ve worked. but again, it all comes down to that damn ep 11 curse that I thought p’aof was better than, bc you can’t squeeze everything that needed to be reconciled after this breakup and everything they wanted to do into one ep, not with this show.

i didn’t hate the idea of a breakup. if you’re going with the narrative of mohk having a fear of being away from day bc of his trauma and so on then fine, that works. and so it works that they had to be away from each other to grow in that way, but I do think it was unkind to mohk to send him away on that note. some understanding, and day wanting him to go for his own good would’ve felt kinder, and even if they were his real intentions, they didn’t communicate that either. it just felt like day had no empathy for him. and yes he was probably hurting too feeling like no one was trusting him, but whatever, it could’ve been done better. and if they wanted to play on anything else, then hey there was that whole bit with the car and day thinking mohk was looking after him just for the money, why not use that and the fact the opportunities mohk got in his career were connections bc he was with day. day could’ve been like well that was the whole point, you don’t work for me forever, you can do whatever you want now, or even just played more on him feeling like he’s holding mohk back. idk, i just mean if this breakup was going to turn out to be 3 years, no contact at all, which it did, it should’ve felt bigger than a 5 second argument.

anyway, then the finale comes and again, if they’d given more reason for a breakup, i would’ve understand more why day keeps on denying mohk a second chance, which i already don’t like the phrasing of bc it makes out like he did something wrong and needs to earn a second chance which he doesn’t. the whole thing would’ve been more understandable if this was day realizing that they both grew and found happiness in what they’re doing and he didn’t want to ruin that when the breakup meant it could happen. or they could’ve completely 180-ed and shown that one of them wasn’t happy, or both, idk mohk had no one in the states and was incredibly hurt and lonely, day was struggling after losing mohk like he did and reinforcing the idea that he couldn’t be independent made him retreat again. just anything would’ve given more strength behind a need to push away, and would have made it more satisfying when love overcomes it all blah blah blah.

and as much as i liked the airport scene and the fact day did go after him, do you know what would’ve been more impactful? day, knowing his full ability, and going against his mom who still worries for his safety or going bc of his mom seeing that he’s not truly happy, bc both could’ve worked given different writing, getting on a plane by himself and going after mohk, seeing him be able to traverse it all. for once we watch day by himself and unlike at the start of the show, we’re not constantly scared he’s gonna get hurt, bc he’s confident and able now and we can just watch him go after mohk and be excited about it, like the end to any other romance story. and it would’ve meant mohk got this moment where, after looking after day so much and getting broken up with bc he cared too much, he gets to see day caring for him that much too.

and the sight thing. yes, with the time they had they shouldn’t have done it, it should’ve been that they manage to find their own happiness despite it all, then the whole show would’ve been about day accepting his situation and standing up for his own ability and his own right to independence and happiness, and it would’ve meant mohk could overcome his fear of loss and guilt over his sister and learn that he isn’t to blame for anything, bc now day can make his own decisions and is ok on his own. now if there was more time, i could’ve seen it working, but only with stronger writing. I would’ve loved to have seen a conversation over day getting his sight back, maybe him not wanting it bc he’s accepted the way he is much like how some deaf people don’t want implants, and the opposing argument of how not all people in his place can have the possibility of seeing again. we could’ve seen fear in the opposite direction now that he’s used to his life, and that damn first scene of part 4, we could’ve seen him then wanting to go out into the world and look after people like him, just like mohk did for him, bc mohk made him see the importance of having someone there for you that cares for you and sees you as a person, as normal, not as your disability. and funnily enough, do you know what made me cry at the end of it? then showing the pictures that were taken when day was blind. that’s the kind of thing i wanted to see, and wished i did if they had more time. day getting his sight back but still showing how connected he is to who he was at that time and while not being thankful for it happening, being thankful for the way he’s grown, and loving the person he sees in those pictures. to go from someone who hid himself and his blindness to someone who shares his story and helps and advocates vocally for those like him, despite not being blind anymore. that way you still get to give day his sight back as your happily ever after but manage to retain the message.

so yeah. they missed the ball. but i also want to remove this idea that an ending ruins a whole show. at the end of the day, it’s one ep, and when a show has done so much good in all its other eps, at least in my eyes, that’s the stuff I’d rather talk about and remember.

[seattlesellie]

this is super random (also this is my first msg to u hi <3) and i’m honestly asking this generally to anyone else who also happens to read this, but recently i’ve realized my sexual orientation and come to the conclusion that i’m like REALLY attracted to women (as a woman myself ofc). so obv this made me also think abt how someday i’m gonna have to tell ppl close to me abt this but i’m literally losing my mind cause i’m NAWT vulnerable especially w/ my parents 😭 and also i just now was watching a tiktok live that was full of homophobic ppl and whenever i see that on the internet, it makes me wanna go deeper in the shell (or closet lmao) that i already am in. like it makes me realize how many horrible ppl there are that won’t accept smth so simple (i’m also very emotional as u can see 😍) so like tbh i’m not sure what i’m seeking here but ig i’m just curious if u or anyone else has felt like this/what helped u come out? like it’s so hard for me to be open and as someone who recently graduated and is going to uni, in a completely diff country alone, i’m gonna have more freedom and if i were to date another girl, it’d feel unfair to my parents if i didnt say anything prior abt my identity. ik they’re also very supportive, which i’m thankful for, but i just HATEEE vulnerability. idk man :( it’s also very weird finally realizing more abt myself. it makes me SO happy yet so so so scared? aarrghh idk sorry abt this long message, u seem like the nicest person and this place feels safe, so i just felt like i could ask/find some kind of relatability. 💗 sorry again for this long ass rant LOLS 🌟

okokok im gonna tell u my coming out story because i can awfully relate to this ?? n adding a read more cos this is so long sorry <333 🤧

literally knew i liked girls my entire life and like suppressed the shit out of it. would try and date guys all throughout highschool and would feel so terrible afterwards… but like you, i was super uncomfortable with that type of vulnerability and also barely had any gay friends, let alone any gay female friends. so i spent my life just thinking im gonna be in the closet forever !! until i met my now ex gf, she would constantly be sleeping over— but i did the classic thing of telling my parents she was just my new best friend, until one day my dad was like… be so fr rn are you two dating. like you said, my parents are also very liberal and supportive (especially my dad), but still— it made me panic and drop a mug and deny deny deny !! then, after being together for like 6 months it was incredibly hard to hide it, and obvs she felt super uncomfortable bc i was super closeted and she was super out. so i kind of had to come out to my parents (i hid under a blanket and told them i have an important thing to say n then they already somehow knew). my parents and i literally never talked about these things like my mom didn’t even know about my first kiss or literally NOTHING about me, we didn’t have that type or relationship at all so i can relate to u so hard !!but like here’s the thing— i don’t think it would be unfair to your parents, this is your story to tell and you should do it when you feel comfortable enough, and if it takes you dating a girl for that then so be it. you shouldn’t worry about other peoples feelings about this, as this is yours to tell and not theirs! as long as you’re in a safe environment, coming out can truly be such a big fucking relief !! like that absolute weight that drops out of your chest is so so freeing. if the people who are close to you love you— they will accept you. if they won’t? truthfully, they don’t deserve u and never have. about the homophobia, its always going to be here, unfortunately for us hateful and bigoted people will always exist, and that can be extremely stressful and painful, which is why surrounding yourself with people from your own community is so so important and necessary. uni is such a good place to do that !! so many new people to meet and especially queer people to surround yourself with !! i super understand your fears but the good things that happen after you come out— that feeling of no longer needing to hide yourself is so so worth it 💗💗💗💗

[aritamargarita]

GOLDEN || 006

you thought it was attitude but ITS GOLDEN

trying to make up for being so behind. really been enjoying these chapters. we are pulling all the grandpas and dilfs yes we are. MALEWIFING THEM ONE AT A TIME. AND WE CANT FORGET ABOUT THE LADIESSSSS!!!! HEY LADIES!!!!HEY LADIES!!!!!!! consider this chapter a bit of a timeskip, we’re goin to the intergender match yes yes. it’s not gonna be what you think y’all have to listen to the plan. i have to put the pieces in place….

scrambling events here the way i would like them to go, so this is like at the end of the year, it’s november / december 1997,,,,idk. it’s a vibe im hungry as fuck. splitting the chapters because well? yeah. i have things that happen post match

sorry triple h for cropping you out but it’s chyna foreva and always..im just one of her sassy shootas!!!

YOU ARE VERY happy you have something to do tonight. You’re thrilled, even. All you want to do is showcase your wrestling skill. But things don’t always go the way you want it to..

BACKSTAGE // 7:01 PM

After Shawn told you about the upcoming intergender match last show, you decided to go head to the hotel for the night and rest up. You also make a mental note to issue an apology for Bret for not showing up…

But this was pretty important. It’s the week of Christmas, so you’re sure that the company has a lot of plans for the holiday..

You’re in DX’s dressing room, sitting on the floor and doing stretches. You had a reputation among your peers in previous companies for turning up to the events early. They didn’t know whether to envy it or love it. You’re always ready to go.

The door opening startled you from the floor, Chyna being the first to walk in with two duffel bags. She doesn’t greet you at first, but you watch as she sets her things down.

“Hi!” You chime.

And at the sound of your voice, she jumps too. You don’t think she noticed you at first. “Hey. You scared me.”

“You scared me too.” You smile, standing up. “What’s up?”

“Nothing in particular.” She responds. “You’re here early.”

“Oh, I always get here early. I like to be ready, you know?” You start to feel nervous in her presence, which you’re already hitting yourself mentally for. Somehow, you feel like you be trying to impress her. “You’re here early.”

Immediately, the tone in her voice changes into irritation. “Hunter was taking too long. I left without him. Shawn’s probably going to get him now.”

“You snooze, you lose.” You say, completely understanding. Truth be told, it kinda reminded you of Raven. Sometimes, you’d travel with him by car. Stevie would tag along at times too, but you’d much rather just ride with him alone if Raven’s gonna take forever.

Raven would come out 10 minutes late and it would mess with your schedule. He started doing a little better after you chewed him out about it, but the principal…

Just was you considered leaving him in the dust, he’d come outside, suitcase and all. There’s a tiny part of you that misses traveling with them, but, yeesh.

There was a moment you got fed up once and for all. Seeing some girl hastily leave his hotel room really upset you for some reason. You’re not exactly ready to explore why, but it really pissed you off.

You didn’t even care, you just left. Unfortunately, you fell right back into the trap of talking to him when he cornered you during an ECW show to ask what’s the deal….

Now’s not the time to mull over these things, you’re still talking to Chyna.

“Hey, why don’t we travel together next show? I’ll drive!” You offer. “That way we can get here on time and do what we need to do.”

“Fine with me.” It’d probably be better for the both of you, especially since you offered to drive. Chyna just hopes you’re a better driver than Shawn. She’ll never ride with him in a vehicle again.

The last time the three of them rode together, Hunter had been egging Shawn on the entire time, telling him to zig zag through the cars “if he’s not scared”. With the Heartbreak Kid being the show off he is, he did.

Never. Again. They’re lucky they didn’t crash.

“I heard we had an intergender match.” You continue on. You won’t let this conversation end so easily. “Is it me and you…?”

Chyna shakes her head. “No. It’s you and Hunter versus Shawn and I. They wanted to experiment and switch us up.”

Boo…

At least Hunter seemed nice, despite the fact he threw wads of paper at your head the other day. Nothing’s wrong with him at all. In fact, you’ve been meaning to ask him how he keeps up with his hair. It’s so nice.

However, you really wanted to work with Chyna, not against her. Even though you had ring gear, you would’ve changed it if it meant you could match with her.

“Aw man. I wanted to partner with you!” You complain. “We would’ve had so much fun.”

There’s a ghost of a smile on her face, but as soon as you look at her, it goes away. “It would’ve been nice to be partners. But it’s just not happening. Don’t expect me to go easy on you, [Name].”

You give her a thumbs up. “I wouldn’t want you to!” It goes silent for a minute, so you return to the ground to stretch a bit more.

“I have something for you.” Chyna suddenly speaks up, making you look towards her. “Here, take this.” She tosses a rolled up shirt in your direction.

You unroll it, revealing a black shirt that says ‘Chyna Syndrome’. Woah.

“I hope you don’t think it’s selfish or anything. It’s just that Hunter and Shawn are wearing it tonight…” She trails off. You don’t even care if it was selfish or not. She just gave you a gift!

“Not at all, thanks! I’m definitely wearing it tonight.” This has gotta be your new favorite shirt. You’d cut it into a crop top, but you don’t want to ruin it. You may settle for tying it. “I really like this.”

“Good to hear.”

“You, uh, wanna go shopping before the next Raw?” You ask. “I’ve got a really good eye, I think we can find something you’d like!”

Chyna’s never been shopping. Well, she has, but not with another girl in the company. “Sure.”

Yet again, the door opens. Neither of you look up. You’re too distracted with your shirt and Chyna’s sorting through her belongings.

“Ohhh! Look at our lovely ladies congregating!” Shawn loudly says, tossing his bag to the side to come over to you. You’ve started to associate obnoxiously loud noises with him. “Raw’s never looked so good!”

You roll your eyes, but you can’t help the smile that appears on your face.

“C’mon, do a little twirl for me!” He’s a little too spontaneous. Is this how he always acts? You don’t mind though..

You give him your hand and he immediately spins you around.

“What a sight for sore eyes! You know, that Sergeant Slaughter guy’s been a real pain in the ass. Ever since they let him be Commissioner…”

You really start to tune him out after a while. Hunter’s over there getting his stuff together, and your eyes trail over to him as he walks over to Chyna. He looks frazzled, but you hear him chuckling soon after.

Good, he doesn’t seem too angry. Even if he did, you’d definitely defend Chyna quickly.

“…..And he knows I’m the champion! He’s putting my title on the line, can you believe that?! So you know what we’re gonna do? We’re gonna mess up the match. We’re gonna do it our own way. [Name], I need you to lay down for me.”

Him saying that immediately caught you off guard, looking at him in confusion. “You want me to what?”

You had no clue he was champion. The first time you met him, he wasn’t carrying his belt around.

“I want Chyna and I to win. It’s the least you could do, you know, since she’s letting you win the Miss Slammy awards…”

That was two bombs at once. Goddamn.

“Miss Slammy?” You repeat.

For some reason, you notice Chyna turn away in the corner of your eye. Is she embarrassed? Shawn comments on it. “Hey! Don’t get all shy now. You offered. You see, [Name],” He slings an arm around your waist.

“—there’s this thing called the Slammy’s coming up. Big formal event, it’s like the Emmy’s.” He explains.

“It’s like the Emmy’s??” You question. A wrestling event like the Emmy’s, huh? You feel like you’ve heard of something like that before. The only banquet event you’ve been to lately was Terry Funk’s Lifetime Achievement Banquet. You gave a speech and everything.

“Yup. You know, I’ve heard you’ve got nominated. Don’t tell anyone else, I just heard that down the grapevine.”

The grapevine?

You’re surprised. It’s one thing to be nominated, but another thing because you literally just got hired. “Are you serious? Don’t mess with me.”

“Yup. We were thinking about rigging the votes. Chyna, being the sweetheart she is, said she’d rather you get the win.” He grins.

That really is sweet of her. You’re already turning around to tell her ‘thank you’ one more time.

It’s not fair to the other nominees, whoever they are. You shake your head. “I’d rather win it myself fair and square. You know me and Hunter won’t go easy on you.”

Shawn can only scoff at your words. “That’s boring. You’re really gonna let Marlena win over you? Now personally, if that was me…?”

Marlena’s nominated too?

Well, now you absolutely had to win! You quickly interrupt him. “Um, no way. For sure, I think I’ll be Miss Slammy, but I told you I want to do it the fair way.”

“If you say so. Oh shit, I almost forgot. Listen, [Name], What I really wanted to ask you was…..”

Chyna and Hunter both look over at him curiously, but Shawn shakes his head and waves his hand at you dismissively. “Nevermind.”

“Shouldn’t you be talking with Chyna?” Hunter makes his way over to you two. “That’s my tag team partner now.”

“I’m not worried, Trips.” He says. “Me and Chyna are gonna win, even if [Name] won’t lay down for me.”

“I’m not going to lie.” You speak up, causing everyone to look at you. “I kinda wanted to be in Chyna’s corner. Really bad.”

“Unfortunately, you’re not!” Hunter cuts in, a shit eating grin on his face. “You’re with me. Aren’t you happy??”

You hesitate for a minute to respond. You’re a-ok with teaming with Hunter, but you like how he’s starting to get all sour about it. “Ehh…..”

He’s not too happy with your answer. “That’s not fair. You know, we’re gonna have to bond sometime, new girl..”

Chyna holds her hand up to her mouth, hiding her snicker. With the idiocy bouncing between Shawn and Hunter, you may be her only saving grace.

After that fiasco, you headed out to check out the card for the night. It should’ve been on the wall somewhere. Just before you could study it, one of the staff members called you over.

Before he started speaking to you, he holds down his earpiece. Someone must’ve been talking to him at the same time. He eventually looks up at you. “Evening. I’ve got some papers from Creative for you. You can look through them...”

“Okay. Thanks.” You nod, taking the papers from his hands.

Great, more papers. You thought what Rick Rude put you through was hell, you just hope you don’t have to sign anything else right now.

“Vince McMahon wants to speak with you as well. He’s in the meeting room next to the catering area.”

Oh fuck. The boss wants to speak with you too?? You hope you didn’t do anything wrong yet..

You’re already panicking as you turn away quickly and make your way to the meeting room. It’s strange he wants to see you there instead of the office.

You don’t know why you’re so nervous. You’ve dealt with Bischoff and Heyman. There’s no reason why you couldn’t deal with Vince McMahon.

In your defense, it was a new playground. You haven’t gotten a feel for the work environment or for your coworkers.

The people you’ve met so far have been pretty okay though. Things were off to a nice start, so you’re not entirely worried on that front.

As soon as you got there, you remember to take a breath with your hand on the handle.

Once you swing it open, you already start to feel pretty awkward as all eyes fall on you. There’s only one familiar face in the room and it’s Sable, who looked incredibly bored until you walked in.

“Good evening.” Vince says. “Please take a seat.”

The only open seat there is was one across from Sable. How convenient! This definitely was a set up. You don’t say anything as you quietly take a seat. You don’t forget to wave at Sable.

She just blankly stares at you. You wonder if she’s not in a good mood…

Vince begins this meeting with formally greeting the both of you. “Good evening, ladies. I’m sure you’re both wondering why I’ve called you here.”

You and Sable definitely are. This’ll be interesting.

“In the next couple of weeks, at least by the beginning of the new year, we’d like to put you and Sable into a program. [Name], you will be the heel, Sable, you will be the face.”

First of all, this is the wrong blonde you wanted to be in a storyline with. Marlena’s the one who you had to get revenge on, not Sable. She didn’t even do anything.

Did he get the two mixed up?

No, there’s no way. When you’re the boss, you should be able to tell your own superstars apart. There’s a vast difference when it comes to Marlena and Sable.

You point it out. “What about Marlena? I thought we had a thing going on there.”

“It’ll happen eventually.” Vince reassured. “Just not right now. We want Sable to enter the picture, we’ve got plans to split her up from Marc Mero—“

“Wait, you’re splitting us up?” She’s surprised herself, turning her head over to Vince. “…I’m going solo?” You were sure she wasn’t expecting that either. “I don’t know anything about wrestling.”

“Now’s the time to learn.” Vince says, shuffling papers. “Two of my up and coming female stars, going head to head. This is where the dough is made. This, is what’ll get us some views.”

The way he said it made you a little uneasy. He was almost on the verge of laughter. Something’s definitely not right in his head.

You’re not exactly sure what to do. You’re conflicted, especially since he was mumbling on and on about the amount of money he’d be making. Damn old men these days.

It makes you idly look at the table for a moment. You’re not bored per-say, just concerned. Okay, perhaps just a little scared too.

Sable seems to mirror you, although the frown on her face is more noticeable. It’s silent in the room, save for the occasional chatter you’d hear outside the door.

It’s starting to make you uneasy, so you speak up. “I’m gonna be a heel, huh?”

Vince snaps out of his rant and looks towards you. “Yes. Just be prepared to be booed. The people aren’t going to like you. They’re gonna like Sable. She’ll be over.”

Great! You’re putting her over. You just hope she doesn’t get injured by the end of this, though if she says she doesn’t know how to wrestle, you hope that YOU don’t get injured by the end of this.

“I don’t want to take any bumps.” She says outright, crossing her arms. “Especially hard ones.”

You don’t know how this’ll work then. She doesn’t have a choice. “There’s just no way around it, you know? I’ll go easy on you, okay?”

It didn’t make her feel any better. Sable shakes her head. “No. I don’t want to.”

You turn your attention to her. “…If we have to work together, you’re taking a bump. I don’t know what else to tell you.”

She snaps at you. “Who are you to tell me what I have to do?”

“Someone who’s putting you over, and I don’t HAVE to do that.” You can keep up with her. Something you’ve learned being in the business was to never take shit from anybody. Though, it may have been the result of Terry instilling a lot of courage into you.

Sable stands up from her chair. “I can get over just fine by myself! I don’t need you. Remember where you came from, some company no one even knows about.”

She jabs a finger in your face, but you swipe it away. “Oh yeah, I remember where I came from. And I’m about to use this table and fucking—“

Vince stands up too, clenching his fists. “THIS IS WHAT WE NEED!” He yells, damn near startling the both of you.

…….

He clears his throat, regaining composure. “If you have this much energy in the ring, both of you would be winners. You two need to calm it down immediately. This meeting is adjourned.”

Most of the people in the room leave, frazzled by you and Sable’s bickering.

Sable doesn’t forget to give you a glare before she leaves. You’re stiffing the hell out of her when the time comes.

You’re just about to leave too, probably to storm off and complain to the first person you see. Vince stops you just in time.

“[Name], I’d like you to meet someone,” He says. One of the members stayed behind it seems. Your mood is starting to sour, which doesn’t bode well for anyone in the future. However, you do your best to keep up a front for the boss.

Vince grunts something and motions with his head toward you. The younger man examines you, but at Vince’s movements, seems to take the hint and reaches out his hand for you to shake. “I’m Shane.” He introduced. “His son and the co-owner of the company.”

Interesting! You could see the resemblance as soon as you saw them side by side. Incredibly uncanny. Being face to face with both of your superiors felt strange.

“Hey.” You take his hand and shake it. “[Name], but you probably already know that. Really sorry for my outburst earlier.”

He chuckles. Thankfully, he didn’t seem to mind too much. “It’s fine. Just shows how serious you take the business.”

Vince looks between you two.

For some reason, he can feel the connection already. This will be documented for future reasons, of course. Alas, you’ve got something to do. “[Name], I’m glad you’ve came to this meeting today. Don’t disappoint on your match tonight. I will be watching.”

You’ll try your best.

BACKSTAGE // 7:24 PM

Before you had gone to gorilla, Hunter quickly ran you through how things would go. It’s a simple match. Nothing too fancy. He just requested you to do stupid shit every once in a while.

He had forgotten his water bottle, so he ran back to the locker room really quick. You stand there, using a rubber band to tie part of it into a knot. You have your gear on under it, but you’ve gotta represent.

So true, you indeed have Chyna Syndrome.

“Wow, I can’t believe you’re actually going to wear it..” Chyna’s voice comes as a surprise to you, making you turn around with another smile.

“With pride!” You pose, just as if she was holding a camera. “By the way, are we all coming out separate with our partners or all together?”

“Me first, then Shawn, then you two.” She says. “Don’t forget to put your game face on. Me and you are first to go at it in the ring. The other two take over after.”

Okay, this wasn’t too bad. Shawn wanted all of you to mess with this Sergeant Slaughter guy and you knew Chyna wasn’t going to go easy on you, but there’s gotta be a way to goof around with her in the meanwhile…

Hunter comes back with his water bottle in hand. “Shawn’s not here yet?” He looks around, completely confused.

Chyna just shrugs. “No. I’m not exactly sure what he’s doing.”

“Oooh, we win by default. Hunter, let’s hold the championship together.” You say.

“I’ve got an even better idea.” He says. “You’re gonna lift your shirt up and…” He trails off, glancing over at Chyna. He does not want her to beat him up for saying that to you. “…put the title belt on.”

“Just for me? Sweet.” It flew over your head this time. “I’m not opposed for sure.”

Chyna just shakes her head. Just in time, Shawn comes around with his belt in tow, a smile on his face. His gear was pretty gaudy, with a vest and some….what the hell is he even wearing…? It looks like you could unzip part of the pants, but even so, this shit looks like a fashion disaster.

“You guys ready to wrestle?”

Of course you were.

Chyna and Shawn are first out, just as she said. Then it was you and Hunter. You hadn’t ‘officially’ been given theme music quite yet, so they just allowed you to come out with Hunter to DX’s theme until decided.

All of you settle into the ring. You and Chyna were first up.

You’re ready, unable to fight the smile on your face. Chyna on the other hand, was as doing her best to be stoic as ever. You understood it though, she had to be.

Chyna comes towards you and you immediately fall down to the ground.

The crowd gets a good laugh out of it. You’re “knocked out” cold and she didn’t even hit you. Hell, she didn’t even touch you!

She stares down at you, then grabs your leg to drag you around the canvas a bit. You’re still not moving. She then tries to pin you, but you kick out.

You stand up and shoot her a smile. She can only roll her eyes at you, another smile playing at the corner of her lips. You’ll try and be serious now. The two of you lock up, but Chyna breaks it up and irish whips you into one of the corners.

You try to sell it as hard as you can, but it backfired on you completely. That shit really hurt! For a second, you keel over, your back absolutely killing you.

Using the ropes for some leverage, you jump up and hook your legs around her neck for a rope-aided hurricanrana. That’s one move!

Once you hit the ground, you try and exaggerate. (It still hurt though.) “Ow, ow!” You whine, putting a hand on your back. “OOOOOWWWW!” You try whining a little louder, rolling around.

Shawn’s eager to get himself tagged in, holding his hand out for a slowly recovering Chyna.

She sees it and reluctantly tags him in. She wanted to go a little longer with you, but she couldn’t deny him. He’s chipper as hell.

You use the ropes to stand up, then stagger over to him. The two of you were face to face in the ring.

He can only give you a grin. “Remember when I said you have to lay down for me?”

“Uh, yeah?”

Nothing could prepare you for what he was going to do next. He immediately tackling you down like a football player. “I meant it!” When he gets you down to the ground, the referee had started to count it as a pin.

“OW! What the fuck!” You exclaim.

If he wants to play dirty, then so be it! You don’t even let the referee hit two, you kick out immediately.

“Woahhh! You kicked out!” He was taunting you. As you try to get up, he starts to push you down, grabbing your arms to try and stop you from swiping at him. “Watch the hair!”

You’re getting a little frustrated at how he’s holding you down, so you’re doing your best to get the hell out of it. He’s having a bit of a hard time controlling you.

The crowd is enjoying this very much. Whatever you guys are doing, it’s working in your favor!

Shawn’s decently impressed, you’re much stronger than he thought! Well, of course he thought you were strong, you had twisted his arm in the hallway pretty hard.

Normally, girls would just turn into putty under him, especially if they were play fighting like this.

“Hey, HEY, HEY—“ His voice slightly rises in volume as you start to push him off of you with your legs. He doesn’t let go of your arms, trying to overpower your own attempts of moving away.

It’s not doing him any justice. You’re able to flip over him and roll off. That was incredibly embarrassing. In the middle of the ring, no less.

You jump up to your feet and he does too. What’s next?

You take a few steps back and so does he. Then you take a few steps forward. He does too. Is he copying you?!

You hold you arm up and he follows. Yeah, he definitely was copying you. You slowly lower it and flip him off. He returns the favor. Goddamn it.

You’re not for the bullshit, you’re just not. You back away and tag Hunter in. He hits your hand and you switch places.

Shawn doesn’t tag Chyna in, instead deciding to jump in place. You have a feeling that it’s going to go downhill from here.

Both of them pull on the ropes a bit, warming the ring up. They’re acting like the match is just beginning.

Once they’re all finally all geared up, the two of them lock up…and Hunter quickly throws Shawn right onto the mat. He just lays there.

It was a little too easy, definitely done on purpose. Maybe he was even mocking you a little bit.

Hunter bounces off the ring ropes and just as you think he’s about to do something, he just runs and bounces off, jumping over Shawn every so often.

You can’t help but to laugh. Hunter flops right on top of Shawn and pins him with no issue. Congratulations, you two won! He’s the new champion! …Of whatever the hell the theme was, you guess.

“Your new European Champion, Hunter Hearst Helmsley!”

European champion? Ah, very nice.

Shawn’s in the middle of the ring having a temper tantrum. He slams his hands and balled up fists onto the mat. Once he comes up, you see him crying crocodile tears.

Poor thing. He runs over to Chyna for some comfort, the woman fighting a laugh as hard as she could.

Hunter’s brought to tears of joy, crawling around and throwing his arms up. He crawls over to you and hugs your waist. You pat his back.

The referee hands over the title to you and you slightly drape it over his back, trying to catch his attention. He lets go of you and rises to his feet, taking it away from you and holding it up to the crowd.

“You know…” Shawn, now equipped with a mic, can barely get his words out without dry-heaving. “It’s—it’s—“ He pauses for a minute, choking over his tears. Boohoo!

There’s a man at the front of the stage watching all this chaos go down. Now that you take a look around, this arena is a little different than the usual.

Hunter throws his arm around you for support like he just wrestled a very hard match. Shawn’s still sobbing. He takes a minute to pull it together.

“It’s not easy being defeated for the European tiiittleeee…I’ve been in so many matches…I’ve been in ladder matches, I’ve been in cell matches, I’ve been in marathon matches, but, oh god—never has any match been so….emotionally, physically, and mentally draining as this one..”

Shawn continues wordvomiting something else something akin to “youtwowonfarandsquareaauughhh” but then hands over the mic to Hunter.

“I’d just like to say one thing. Other than my kid being born….I don’t have one, that I know of—,” He pauses, definitely letting that sink in. “This is the greatest moment of my life!! YOU ALL SAW IT! I DID ITTTT!!” He yells.

Hunter doesn’t forget to shout you out. “AND [NAME], MY BEAUTIFUL PARTNER, THAT NONE OF YOU PEOPLE IN THE CROWD WILL NEVER GET THE CHANCE TO BE AROUND! THANK YOU!! Oh god, thank you!”

You feel like this match kinda sucks….

Seems like things were back to normal. Hunter tosses the mic somewhere after coming in for a hug and Shawn starts doing crotch chops. The latter grabs the mic again. “I know ya’ didn’t need any help from us Sarge, but we made an ass outta you anyway! MERRY CHRISTMAS!”

Even with Christmas being just days away, you don’t exactly feel in the spirit….

the night is not over. I REPEAT THE NIGHT IS NOT OVER. yes the match was short and stupid. yes we’re complaining about it next chapter (so are some fans…) DO NOT WORRY,,

mickie actually does the rope-aided hurricanrana, it’s pretty cool, though i just think mickie herself is pretty cool :). im actually gonna make a gif move set list to reference or something like that i dunno.

you know, golden seems much more “mature” than attitude idk maybe it’s just me. that was a fun match to write,,sometimes my worst enemy can be writing too much in one paragraph grrr. anyway i hope you guys enjoyed i liked this kinda sorta. until next time

do you guys remember when dx “invaded” wcw? lol thought it would be funny if reader was there like damn.

[theyhitthepentagon]

having autism and avpd really sucks cuz everything makes an imprint on me no matter how small it is so i have to either

abstain from everything that i am not currently into so i stay consistent for the people around me (makes me scared of my friends and what accidentally changing will do to our relationship) OR

being into whatever i want and risk becoming annoying and losing my friends forever cuz i changed too hard and it made me suck (makes me and them sad)

i think being into things that are smaller scale helps with this because im really into ss14 right now and the community is very good theres not much negativity outside "this guy plays the game in a way that ruined my game which makes me mad" or "this map fucking sucks and heres why" which is like Nothing compared to some more popular communities ive lingered around recently (regretevator, homestuck). but in general idk. this is just not a fun way to exist. i wish i wasnt the doormat of the communities surrounding my favorite things :p

this is just the social ramifications of existing too dont even get me started on likw academic/career shit i dont want to think about it

[multiplicity-positivity]

i dont know if i've sent an ask like this before but. i've been fronting for a week or so now. im not really frontstuck - i can leave, and others can come into cofront, but i'm very scared to leave front. i don't know if im afraid of losing control or memory or something but i'm too nervous to leave and. idk do you have advice? i feel lost here :(

Hey - so I’m usually fronting to some extent, but I also used to really struggle with giving up control and allowing my alters to take over in order to take care of us and live their lives. Honestly it’s something that I still struggle with from time to time. It’s a common thing for headmates to worry about losing control, losing touch with reality, losing previous memories, and losing time in general when it comes to leaving the front.

What’s helped me a lot with these fears is having some genuine, serious discussions with my alters and making some requests. We’ve had talks about fronting, and how one member leaving the front absolutely does not mean that they won’t ever front again. I’ve also asked my alters to help keep me informed on anything that happens while I’m outside the front, and I try to do the same for them. In this way, we still have lots of memory gaps, but we’ve been learning to try and help each other fill in the blanks. Learning how to compromise and collaborate with my parts like this has taken a lot of time, patience, and therapy, but I think we’ve been making improvements overall.

If you’re afraid of going dormant, or that by leaving the front, you may never be able to front again, it may be of some comfort to you to know that dormancy doesn’t last forever. We had a part re-emerge last year after over a decade of dormancy. It took him a while to readjust to life, but these days I’d say he’s doing pretty good. Dormancy doesn’t mean death, and it’s not really something that needs to be feared. Individual headmates don’t die in systems, and any time you leave the front, know that it really won’t last forever.

Getting pulled from the front used to freak me out a lot, but these days I’ve gotten more used to it. I’ve been trying to learn to go with the flow of my system and make space for my alters to express themselves, even if that means giving up control sometimes or even fully leaving the front (which again, is still pretty rare for me).

Really it took just time, therapy, and being genuine and open with my parts to finally grow less scared of leaving the front. Idk how helpful this will be for you… but I hope that with time you’ll find it easier to allow other headmates in your system to take over. It’s definitely a process tho, and don’t be too sad if you still struggle with leaving the front after spending time trying to work through your fears with your system.

Wishing you the best.

💫 Parker

[quodekash]

I HAVE ICE TEA, TIME FOR EPISODE 2 im so scared

iMMEDIATE winnysatang. i love them but i genuinely dont understand why it couldnt be seanmaitee.

im gonna rewatch simm after this and write an essay about why seanmaitee should be together, just in case theres anyone who doesnt believe me

i have so many mixed emotions rn

i love them both so much

and there's no hatred towards them at all because theyre just the actors, not the ones in charge

and i do love winnysatang and i love the chemistry they have with each other

and theyre both so pretty

and bc theyre the same actors they make me think of soundwin and soundwin make me infinitely happy

but theyre not soundwin, theyre sean and nay

and sean is desperately in love with maithee, he has been for the entire series

and, as far as we know, in canon, sean and nay have literally never interacted so why are they suddenly sticking to each others sides??? why isnt sean sticking to maitee's side?? he's always at maitee's side, always has his arm around him, always looking at him. why did his character suddenly have to change once msp came out, just for winnysatang fanservice??

is this neurodivergent backpack-holding i see here?

"i told you to wear warm clothes" "well i wanted you to hug me more" NO YOU DONT UNDERSTAND, THATS SO STINKING CUTE

bro theyre so in love

theyre so in love

how are they so in love

i love them

wait a sec (lmao win/nay in that screenshot looks great)

dont tell me naysean are gonna share a tent

that doesnt make sense even without considering the ships

sean and maitee are clearly the bestest of friends

even if you were to argue that the constant arms around each other is entirely platonic, it feels a lot like a close-friends-been-close-forever-dont-want-to-let-go-and-lose-you kinda thing, so wouldnt you expect them to share a tent?????

idk man

sean captaincy reigns supreme

dang it

GOSH DARNNIT PART OF ME KINDA LIKES THE NAYSEAN

going from two people who barely know each other because of a mutual friend and then they meet for the first time and theres like immediate attraction and yadda yadda storyline

i still think i prefer seanmaithee tho

hmm

perhaps nayseanmaitee

then everyone's happy

how is he so pretty

and gender

gimme the gender pls

i want it

seriously, the GENDER ON THIS MAN

THE WAY HE DOES THE GENDER

...okay im starting to believe the naysean storyline

but i still want seanmaitheeeeeee

nayseanmaitee is still a strong contender tho

sean, honey, you're not subtle

"i love him even more, every day" kluen, i love you so much. he's so whipped. hes so in love. it makes me the happy

I CANT EXPLAIN IT, BUT KLUEN'S OBNOXIOUS (not in a bad way) AND UNAPOLOGETIC LOVE FOR NUEA IS SO FREAKING SWEET AND WONDERFUL AND INCREDIBLE AND I LOVE HIM SO SO SO SO SO MUCH

"or i might have been with someone new already" "then id be happy for you that you found good love" "that means you must be happy for me now" "why?" "because i found my very good love already" GI3U4EJRBGJKREBDGKHRE

LITLE KISSE

THEY DO THE LITLE KISSE

HAPPY

HAPPY LITLE KISSE

MAKE ME THE HAPPY

NOT LITLE KISSE

LONGE KISSE

LONGE KISSE HAPPY

MAKE ME THE HAPPY

what im tryna say is i love them

"i dont like spaghetti" exCUSE ME MAITHEE?? I PICCOLI ITALIANI CHE ABITANO NEL MIO CERVELLO SONO FURIOSI

PERCHÉ NON TI PIACE GLI SPAGHETTI??

É MERAVIGLIOSO

VAFFANCULO

TI VOGLIO BENE, MA NON MI PIACI AL MOMENTO

"when did you guys stop fighting" che???? what do you mean by that?? what happened between them??????? ANSWERS PLS

omg this started like 40 minutes ago. ive only just finished 1/4. what the hell is wrong with me

nuea and kluen are so freaking in love i love it what the hell

"sean, go wake them up" OH NO, SEAN'S CAPTAINCY OF THE SHIP HAS FINALLY TURNED TO A CURSE

NOT LIKE THIS, MY FRIEND

TRUST ME GUYS, YOU DO NOT WANNA OPEN THAT TENT

lmao they pushed it onto phoon, nice

BVRHKDBFGHJR THIS IS SO FUNNY

i was pretty sure they were awake already (how the hell could one person sleep through the racket those guys were making. even if one of them slept through that, the other would like poke them and say 'we gotta wake up'

iS PRINCE THERE???

PLS

I WANNA SEE PRINCEFAH

GOSH FREAKING DARNNIT

altho the way that thats worded it sounds like he died lmao

lmao nuea and kluen just left them

PHOON LEFT TOO

NAYSEANMAITEE???

dang it just naysean

NUEAKLUEN AND NAYSEANMAITHEE

i refuse to give up on this dream

seanmaitee get together or i. die.

MINPHOOOOOOOON i love them so much

i love nuea and phoon's friendship its so wholesome and pure

everything in this show is so pure

i love it

NO WHY AM I SMILING

ITS BC I LOVE WINNYSATANG

GOSH DARNNIT IM SUPPOSED TO BE ONE OF THE BIGGEST SEANMAITHEE ADVOCATES WHY AM I FALLING INTO THE TRAP

ITS BC WINNYSATANG (and thereby soundwin) AND ITS ALSO BC NAYSEANMAITEE

THAT IS ALL

nueakluen are so in love i love them

how many times have i said that today

probably too many

its fine

oH MY GOSH

CHE CAVOLO

IM DYING

IM FREAKING DYING

A SUNFLOWER RING???

i think im gonna cry

no thats a lie

i know im gonna cry, for sure

WHAT THE HELLLLLL

THIS IS SO FREAKING SWEET

HES SO DRAMATIC

IN THE BEST WAY

I LOVE HIM

HE DID LITTLE GRABBY HANDS GHRBGHBHR

just like me with his gender

*grabby hands* gimme

"THERES A SUNFLOWER AND A STAR" I CANT WITH THEM

BROOOOOOO

"what are you talking about" nuea, it was pretty clear. i think he just proposed to you. or like some kind of statement like 'we're absolutely getting married, that's happening'

i think theyve had a conversation about this in the past. idk if it happened in canon (i dont think it did?????) but it feels like theyve had The Marriage Conversation before

same

LITLE KISSE

lift and walk back into their room lmao

captain is disappointed in his crew

"nuea, ive been rooting for you since high school" nay was the one tending at the docks or whatever and then the ship started sailing and the only one on the boat was sean and he was like 'ah shoot i better figure out how to make a ship not sink now'

i think im getting lost in the metaphor

what im tryna say is even tho nay's been there since high school, sean is still the captain

"should we jsut go to their room?" "let's go" GUYS WAIT NO-

THIS IS MAKING ME HAPPIER THAN I CAN POSSIBLY EXPRESS

MY BOYS

THEYRE FINALLY HAPPY

THEY FINALLY FIGURED IT OUT

THEYRE IN LOVE AND THEYRE HAPPY AND THEYRE TOGETHER AND SOMEONE HELP ME IM GOING TO EXPLODE

LONGE KISSE

HAPPY LONGE KISSE

I HAVE THE HAPPY

THAT'S WHAT WE MUST LEARN

WHETHER ITS SAD OR HAPPY

LET IT HAPPEN NATURALLY

WE MIGHT NEED DESTINY, WE MIGHT NEED TO SAY A PRAYER, WE MIGHT NEED TIME, I STILL NEED TO DISCOVER

LOVE MENTIONED IN A SONG, LET IT PLAY, ONE DAY WE'LL KNOW, JUST LET IT GROW

sorry the msp brainrot is too strong

THE FREAKING FLASHBACKS WHAT THE HELL

THAT WAS WONDERFUL

FREAKING INCREDIBLE

okay now i need to prepare myself for the eclipse preview

goodness gracious im not gonna be okay

im already Not At All Okay, but its gonna be worse in a sec

sorry i just need to take some deep breaths

aaaaaaaaaaaa

okay im ready

(im not ready but i have to watch this)

oh holy hell im already about to have a breakdown

theyre on bikes

they have HATS with the SYMBOL on them

I WANT THOSE HATS

THEYRE STARING AT EACH OTHER INTENTLY

THEYRE SO FREAKING IN LOVE

THEYRE KISSING

akk's waking up from a dream

"are you up, shortstop" HANG ON DID THEY SWITCH THE NICKNAMES????

"shortstop my *ss. you're shortstop" THATS WHAT I SAID

oh nooooo pls dont do a wat/sani thing, pls

do wat/namo

i want puwin's characters to be happy and gay

and sani is a teacher

its problematic

i mean it could be worse but i dont like it

OMG KAN STARING AT THUA

"i thought you wouldnt come" UM FLASHBACKS FROM THAT LINE??? JEEZ THAT SCARED ME

omg cowboy hats

cowboys

i love them

help

im not good

help help

my boys

THEY KISSE

HEEEEEELLLLLPPPP

THOSE LIKE 30 SECONDS ARE GONNA MAKE ME CRY HARDER THAN THE FREAKING SUNFLOWER RING

im rewatching that every single day

help

NEXT WEEK

THEYRE COMING BACK NEXT WEEK

IDK WHAT TO DO WITH MY ARMS AND HANDS

I HAVE TO KEEP TAKING THEM AWAY FROM MY KEYBOARD TO STIM

HELP

AKKAYAN ARE COMING BACK

AND SO ARE THUAKAN

AND IM GONNA GET TO SEE MY WIFE AGAIN

AND THE COMFORT CHARACTER THAT IS WAT

AND THE COMFORT CHARACTER THAT IS KAN

AND THE COMFORT CHARACTER THAT IS THUA

AND THE COMFORT CHARACTER THAT IS SANI AKA MY WIFE

AND THE COMFORT CHARACTER THAT IS AKK

AND THE COMFORT CHARACTER THAT IS AYE

WOAH BIG SURPRISE THEYRE ALL MY COMFORT CHARACTERS BECAUSE ITS MY COMFORT SHOW

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[screampied]

well, hello there. (read as lady dimitrescu’s voice)

ok, vegas, you interacted with my account…again. love, i think you’re ought to find out who i am before we can even smell october 1st. so cute that you think i’m sweet, because whenever i re-read what i wrote for you im like “oh, that’s not…that’s weird”. i also think you are very sweet! i’m intimidated with people, so indeed i took the opportunity of being high and loose and approachable to send you that first ask.

i think being a whore for ghostface is as easy as saying it’s name. the masks stays on!! do i mean sex or the killing? both? yes. hm, moving along, what’s you favorite ghostface? mine would be stu and jill.

oh, oHH. ok but toji removing the mask, slowly, and the first thing you see is his scarred lips with that smirk. like stfu, i’ll show him a scream. and geto. that man is my lawfully husband, and picturing him with that knife is doing stuff to me. blood on his face, like in hidden inventory, passing his thumb to try and clean it…mshdhdjdjdk fainted

sam as ghostface would’ve been predictable, but it would still be cool. i think they could take a different approach with her. while everyone is scared shitless because a knew killer has show up, she would be excited because-well, she can kill now. again and again, with the excuse of saving her friends and sister. maybe might even kill someone by “mistake” who knows. i think it would be nice, i like the idea of the good character going a lil crazy crazy.

the thing about sidney is that they won’t have the courage to kill her. literal mother of the final girls. but… dale? yeah, i’m bracing myself and praying for her poor little soul.

yes!! they were right in what they did and the ones that loses are the directors. the movie won’t do good at all without them, so must likely they will comeback, as we say in my country, “the sorry dog comes back” as in the directors are the sorry dog, with tail in between their legs.

between cars and bikes im more inclined to cars, but bikers and drivers? ugh, i’m sold to the bikers. sukuna is the type of guy to go to street races just for the fun of nearly dying (in a modern world, of course). i picture a red vintage car with black flames draw in it. oh he would so sexy, he is sexy. others i can see in street race is toji (of course, he bets all the time) and suguru. idk this trinity can have me anytime any day anywhere.

SHUT UP HUNGER GAMES IS SO FUCKING COOL

i used to be a divergent person, but hunger games has grow in my heart. finnick and peeta forever the best boys, suzanne collins cooked with them. and then she fucking burned it with finnick’s. still not over it, how come gale is alive???

jokes aside, i actually fuck with her writing so much, because it’s true, there is no actual victory in a war, we lose too much to be able to live through it. too much nightmares and death.

i’m reading a fanfic set in the hunger games universe, nearly as many words as in the bible, and it’s so fucking good. the author wrote the aftermath of the games perfectly, the rebellion, missions, the games itself. it’s everything.

yapping is done, question of the day is favorite movie and favorite music? see ya!!

nut anon

SLLLAAAY

nutty pook i rly enjoy our long chats i just wanna let u know that 🫡. also the lady dimitrescu voice ????? stawp. do you play resident evil oh now that game is my shit.

LOLLLL DID I. i swear it’s not intentional man. maybe it’s fate 🧿🧿 you think im sweet omg ty AAAAH.

sex with ghostface where the mask stays on is actually cry FUCKKK IM GONNA WRITE THAT. october is gonna bring out the slut in my writing istg. ooooh my fav ghostface ?? probably jill and roman. i love amber too, but billy ofc.

GHOSTFACE TOJIIII DONT DO THIS TO ME. he’s so do that, don’t mind me im writing this down 🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️. real they can’t kill the baddest bitch, the whole franchise is nothing without mother.

sukuna as a street racer ID CREEWWAM. i literally saw a sukuna car at the race i went to. i had many interesting thoughts ……. kuna def bets ur so right, toji too with his broke ass.

KEKFLGLHL I LOVE THG ITS SO GOOD. do you like the movies or books better? i like the books but the movies slap

fav movie uhhhhh legally blond, fav music psychedelic pop and indie !!!!

[ubemango]

could you give pups!couple a pregnancy scare, pls I’m on my knees

Why do we like to stress out oc!!!!!! 😩

.

.

.

nyway Im gonna write this in a lazy way bc I dont wanna think about formally writing a drabble LOL. (Added note: for some god awful reason I decided to switch from using the term oc to straight up just using the second person POV hahhdjwjwhHWUQIWIEHEH anyway sorry)

I can imagine oc isn’t too phased by being late on their period bc it’s happened before--probably missing like 2-5 days and it coming like no problem. But this time it’s a week and a half late and they’re slowly like..................... O_O. Ok maybe...... maybe we are in Trouble. And they text Namjoon and they’re like

HELLAO BIG PROBLEM BIG WOOOOOOAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And Namjoon texts back like

what’su p :D why are u screaming?

and oc says CALL ME NEEEEEOOOOOOWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!

and see ok the thing with oc and their texting is that it doesn’t translate to theior actual physical reaction so naturally when oc picks up the phone when Joon calls they’re like “hi babe n_n”, Just very calm and very. Idk not really that phased and Joon is like “What did you wanna talk about?” and oc straight up just goes:

“I might be the 1%!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

and it’s so got dam VAGUE and Joon is like !???!?!1 please explain?!?!?! and oc is like

“Do you know what it’s like to potentially be the bearer of the Second Coming of Christ.”

“Okay please be serious now.”

“Pregnant!!!! With a hard P!”

Namjoon goes :O ohhhhhh…….. okay well I guess you take a pregnancy test then huh.

And oc just like.

“You’re not scared?”

“I know if you don’t do this pragmatically then you might lose it.”

Which is true. You could hate Namjoon for being logical in a moment like this but you secretly are just one more thought of babies away from screaming and crying.

So.

He tells you he’ll be with u in like an hour to get the stuff u need and u sit on the bathroom floor with a blanket around u because the one inch barrier of cotton protects you from all the bad stuff. Luckily your parents aren’t home and Namjoon comes barreling through the front door (exactly an hour later like he said—also he used the key you gave him bc he’s welcome here anytime which makes u feel all giddy) and you can hear him make a beeline up the stairs to the bathroom door. He opens it and he just has a plastic bag that he immediately drops to the ground and he kneels down in front of u n scoops u in his arms and just…. Cradles you like a giant baby 😭😭😭 then You just completely forget why he came there in the first place and he’s kissing u all over ur face n telling u ur silly n that he loves you forever n then it’s like 20 mins later n ur like oh :) guess I should pee on this stick huh

And he watches u take a pee pee bc u need the moral support LOL and eventually it’s down to when ur waiting for that fawking line on the test. And to pass the time Namjoon joins you when u make a home of ur blanket again and digs through the plastic bag and is like look I got u chocolate : ) n u share the pieces and it’s a little melted in the plastic but wow still yummy!!!! Eating snacks with my lover on the bathroom floor, so romantic!

But then Namjoon's gaze just kind of glosses over and he holds your hand. Gives a you a little smile.

"You know I'm always here for you. Right?"

Fear strikes you in your heart. You think of a horrible future where he's not here with you anymore. No spare key to give out. Whatever space you've carved out for him is his alone to occupy. No one could ever replace him.

And you can't help your sniffling!!! You really can't!!!!!!!!!!! He just makes you feel so safe and loved and his face crumbles instantaneously thinking you're upset. He crushes you against his chest in a hug.

He's cooing, petting your head. "Why are you crying? You're my girl, silly."

"I just feel stupid!!!"

You want to articulate how much you adore him. But instead you just crawl into his lap and physically try to manifest your body melting into his. You only go as far as sticking your arms under his armpits and hugging him back as tight as you can before he starts laughing.

"You're not stupid. People fuck and get pregnant all the time."

"Ugh." He's stupidly warm against you. "That's so--I hate how that works."

"Reproduction?"

"Yeah. Like why can't we just keep all the sexiness and skip the babies?" You groan, wiping your eyes. Namjoon flicks your forehead. "Wha--"

"You should check what the tests say now," he reminds you, and you pause. Oh. Right.

You get up and take those few tentative steps to where the tests lie on the bathroom sink. Lean over carefully with both your eyes closed. You take a second to steel yourself. Then you look.

No second line.

You immediately walk back to where Namjoon is cocooned and start throttling his neck.

"How!!!! Dare!!!! You!!!!!!!!! Threaten!!!! My!!!!!!! Uterus!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! With your stupid stupid sperm!!!!!!!!!!!!"

He's cackling. You almost had a heart attack and he's cackling. Of course he is. Namjoon can be serious when he needs to be, but he's also evil and will make fun of you the second he thinks he can do so without too much repercussion.

"Ow. Ow! Let go of me!"

You leave him with a smack to the head.

"I'm going to kill you," you threaten.

Namjoon stands up with an amused scoff, making use of his height to get you to cower. You don't budge. He sighs, opening his arms.

"I promise not to give you loads upon loads next time," he says.

You cave immediately. Collapsing into his chest a second time, your home. "You better not."

[music-my-beloved]

With The Beatles: A 16yo's (horrible) album review pt.2 !!

It Won't Be Long 🚆: Erm, the guitar is just *mwah* chef's kiss it really carries the song, she's the backbone. She's like, duh do do duh do and it's so cute. The background vocals are eating so good !! This song I think was the most prominent to me because I remember it from Across the Universe (incredible movie btw) . Really love this song, she's like a sister to me.

All I've Gotta Do !: Honestly would have done numbers in the 2010s because I feel like it has really good "call and response" potential !! Like, uh that one song,,,, I can't remember uhh oh Ain't No Mountain High Enough . I know I keep saying this but this song IS cute ! Also so far I've noticed they're utilizing back up vocals more which is much appreciated, I hope I hear it in the rest of the tracks on this album.

All My Loving 💗: Yay! More background vocals !! I go feral for them. The guitar is also SO good. If It Won't Be Long is a sister to me this song is my brother. Heard this one a lot growing up as well. Background vocals are heavenly the little , "ooooooos" in the background are so dreamy !!

Don't Bother Me 😔: okay first initial listen it reminded me of when my I would lose my mom in the store 😭😭 my forever "lost mom in the store" anthem !! Uhm, didn't quite jive with the rhythm but that's alright !! But it is a good song!! The dude's a little bit too dependent on that lady maybe her leaving was a good thing ??? idk I'm only guessing 😭

Little Child 🚸: uhm, I'm scared. girl they're gonna catch a case !! If a grown men in their 20s sang this to me I'd be like ,"Oh okay I'm gonna groove with y'all 'cause the beat is funky but the lyrics are concerning so idk might wanna work on that"

Till There Was You 🫵: oh. em. gee. La Vie En Rose who???? Girl this song is swoonworthy !! If a guy was like, "I used to never hear the birds singing before I met you, now that's all I hear" I'd cry OMG 😭😭 also it's just paul singing and like, omg it's so simple but it's simplicity totally makes it amazing !! It feels more personal that way !!! EDIT: OMG IM INJECTING THIS IN MY BLOODSTREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's so amazingly awesome oh em gee I'm actually addicted it's not funny ! Oh my god I'm gonna explode!! Dopamine is real and I'm experiencing the effects, the world beautiful again !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Please Mister Postman ✉️: this is a pretty good cover. Background vocals are once again in the spotlight they're just too good. The iconic beatles sound really starts to take shape in this album I've noticed !! Ringo did a good job on drums too !! Total rock and roll vibe. I was gonna compare it to another band it felt weird because it's like saying the parent sounds like the child and like no wdym the kid sounds like the parent !! I forget how much The Beatles really pioneered music !!!

Roll Over Beethoven 🎹: whaaaaa. man this track was a doozy ! They're cocky and it's workin'. Totally can see enthusiastic young couples totally jammin' to this it's so great ! Really loved the energy !!! Also that guitar solo is the beginning was AMAZEBALLS

Hold Me Tight 🥺: Whoa. This song is my second sister. This track was THE song at the beginning of my Beatles beginning when I was but a wee little girl lolll it's just so addictive. Makes me bop my head and smile everytime I hear it. The endorphins swarmed this one guys sorry 😔

You Really Got A Hold On Me 💕: Contradictions left and right !! Rhythm was a gentle little ebb and flow that was kinda refreshing to hear !! Liked the song.

I Wanna Be Your Man ♂️: whoa. Straightforward!! Some girls might like that in a man but uhm, idk the chanting of "I wanna be your man, I wanna be your lover" with the stark black and white of their faces on the album cover got me scared 😭😭 idk it was nightmare fuel I felt like someone was watching me. Uh but overall it was a high energy song maybe a bit too high energy for me 'cause I'm tired while writing this review but it wasn't really my preferred choice in music but I totally see me liking it like, a month from now !!

Devil In Her Heart ❤️: Maracas ?? 🤨whaarrrrr but uhm this one just felt like another song honestly. As I'm writing this review it's like, my 10th listen in the span of 3 days she's just not clicking 😭😭

Not A Second Time ⏰: Honestly the first few listens she felt bland like unseasoned chicken but now that I'm really listening it's got a simple little jive to her and I'm here for it !! It's got these vocal runs that I don't think I've heard before it's so unique!! Overall really liked her.

Money 💰: uh pink floyd who ???? But seriously this song rocks. Not the catchiest but it's true, she's REAL. I need MONEY

More album reviews on the way, next up: A Hard Days Night...

[jokerlennon]

tagged by @aurelien1944 to talk about five things i like :-)

1 - well the first one has to be chess the musical my best friend.. is it in any real sense "good"? difficult question. is it incredibly fun? yes forever. i personally like it when it's sad and fucked up and florence's father died twenty-five years ago and everybody loses <3 but honestly all versions (and oh boy are there so many versions) have at least some positives to it and a lot of negatives too Perfect Chess does not exist and i don't think it ever will. thank god. i saw it a few days ago they made several weird as shit choices that i didn't like i had the time of my life 💜

2 - hm i have a great fondness for horror i love being scared. that's a lie i hate being scared in general but i love it when a scary movie scares me. you get it. also disgusting bloody gorey body horror practical effects they're so so so cool. im much more fascinated than scared or disgusted usually... sick is the perfect word because wow it IS disturbing usually but also i love sounding like a teenaged boy from the nineties or something. i love a good podcast too archive 81 my best friend archive 81 for example.. i don't read enough horror novels only like 19th century gothic lit i should get into something more modern actually that could be fun...

3 - twin peaks :-) i love it when things are a little strange and unexplained and incredibly earnest about it all. dale cooper is there. i have a lot of feelings about twin peaks but i don't think i can go into it all right now... i have cried to the soundtrack several times let's leave it at that. twin peaks ❤️

4 - i love linguistics most things about language fascinate me the way they change over time the way their rules work the way they interact with each other etcetera... also there's logic to it i love logic. it's like science but with less numbers. waugh i just love languages.... sad thing is you have to memorise words to learn languages i have a knack for grammar rules but i hate learning words especially if they have genders </3 oh well.

5 - discworld i love discworld i started reading them in chronological order AKA from left to right on our entire bookshelf of discworld books a few years ago which from what i've heard from everyone ever isn't ideal but it was FINE i think. (after the tiffany aching books that is i started with those) i only have like two or three books left idk what i'll do with myself if i don't always have one of them lying around somewhere.. they're so good i love them a lot i really enjoy this type of fantasy that takes well-established fairytale and fantasy tropes and subverts them.. like howl's moving castle the only book i read as a five/six yr old that i still like that's a bit off topic though. terry pratchett is a true master of his craft the specific way he writes is delightful to me the books are all so funny the way things that appear to be throwaway gags often come back to be narratively significant is also just incredible. waugh they're good books

tagging @locallibrarylover @porciaenjoyer @nickclose @sludgecorpse or whoever wants mutuals tell me about things u like pleasee