#so i just get snappy and mean and i hate it but idk what to even do

[lesbiansaaviik]

Can I be beautifully honest with you guys? I hate 91 Whiskey and So Says the Sword

[itz-mfkn-de]

\\ALWAYS YOU//. M.R

warnings— OOC MATTHEO, Im a sucker for toxic boys but I made him extra sweet in his one idk why, uhhh not many tbh, cussing, kissing, smoking, that’s all I think.

summary— Mattheo was your best friend, always had been, but was the title of ‘friend’ enough?

-my first work for Mattheo! I will eventually get a master list going once I get more comfertable posting on here. This is a repost of one of my works on wattpad, just with some tweaks bc that work was olldddd-

You sat against mattheos ���𝐞𝐝, 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 out of his dorm window.

"You know, some times, I'm worried for you. You just stare at things, it's weird." He snickered  as he took a drag from his cigarette.

You looked at him and scoffed, "Sometimes I'm worried about your lungs, you're bound to get some type of problem with all that's smoking you do." You half-joked, glancing at him.

He rolled his eyes, tilting his head up and blew the smoke out of his mouth.

"Seriously Mattheo, that stuff is absolute horse-shit for your body." You stated, accompanying your words with a sharp glare.

"I don't do it that often, just when I'm stressed." He muttered, taking his feet off of his desk and turning his body to face you.

"What happened to the whole 'I don't give a fuck about anything or anybody but myself' thing?" You said, mocking him to the best of your abilities.

"First of all I don't fucking sound like that," he laughed and squinted at you "second, just stressed about life, nothing in particular." 

You softly chuckled at his reaction. His eyes broke from yours, looking at some papers on his desk. Your eyes, however, never left his frame. You could stare at him for eternity, everything about his face seemed so perfect, almost as if it were meant to be admired.

You soon realized your staring and quickly averted your gaze towards the window again.

"You gonna go to the Yule ball this year?" You broke the silence, you knew Mattheo hated those things, he hated having to be around a shit ton of people and act like he enjoyed their company.

"Probably not." His demeanor changed, his tone became short, almost snappy.

"Oh, I'm probably just gonna go with Becca." You mumbled, knowing that if no guy was to ask you, Becca had your back.

"Hm." He nearly laughed at your remark.

"What? What's so funny?" You asked, looking back at him, his back still facing you.

"Just surprised you aren't going with a random slytherin guy or something." He answered, but the way he had said it has a strange undertone that you weren't sure how to feel about.

"Well I mean I don't know, I haven't been asked yet." You stated truthfully.

"Ah, I see." He murmured, soon after taking another drag of his cigarette.

You felt tension building in the room, suffocating tension. You weighed your options out, but you decided it would be better to give Mattheo some space, for what you were unsure of.

"Well, Becca and Emma told me they wanted to go dress shopping earlier so I think I'm gonna head over there so we can solidify our plans." You announced while picking up your books and putting them in your bag. 

"Bye Mattheo." You said while walking out of his dorm, expecting a response.

You shut the door when you got nothing, you mind raced with the possibilities on what could've caused mattheos strange behavior.

Maybe he'd just had an off day? No that couldnt have been it, he was fine moments before his attitude took a turn. 

Perhaps he was just having mood swings, you wouldn't be surprised with all the trash he puts in his body.

You stuck with that story and walked back to your dorm, which was on the other side of the slytherin tower. 

You reached it, setting your things down, then quickly turned around and nearly raced to your friends dorm.

The second you reached it, You waisted no time to jump on her bed, causing her to jump. 

"Yes, of course you can come into my room unannounced and lay on my bed." Becca said sarcastically. She had been digging through her closet in an attempt to find a dress. 

"Sorry, I just need to vent." You said while propping yourself up on your elbows.

"Go ahead." She sighed and laid her body weight 

"Okay so, there's this guy. He's like my best friend, but.."

She raised her eyes brows, signaling you to continue.

"But I want us to be more, or atleast I see him as more than a friend. I just feel like no matter how hard I try I can't get him to open up, he just.. won't."  You groaned.

"And everytime I get this sliver of hope that I've made progress, he just completely shuts down, leaving me in the dark confused and a little bit heartbroken!" You borderline screamed, your face shoved into her mattress.

"Okay, uh, let's calm down. If he's not showing any signs of being interested maybe you should just, move on- well attempt to at least." Becca stated ,rubbing your back.

You shut your eyes, truly taking in your friends words.  “hey Yknow what will make you feel better?” She nearly jumped with excitement. “Going to look for a dress in town.”

You knew she only had good intentions but the words kept echoing through your head. The thought of keeping Mattheo as a friend hurt, but it seemed to be all you could do at this point without ruining your friendship.

Maybe she was right.

Maybe you needed to accept Mattheo 

was just a friend.

-

All you could think about was the Yule ball. Over the next few weeks the days flew by, the anticipation growing larger with each one passing.

Of course you had been asked by some sweet guy from the Ravenclaw house, and, taking Becca's advice, you said yes.

There was nothing wrong with him, he just..he wasn't him.

You had decided to get ready alone, slipping into a beautiful green dress you and Becca had picked out. You finished your hair and makeup, looking into your vanity mirror.

You felt beautiful.

You smiled softly at how well you had dolled yourself up.

Glancing up at the clock, you rushed out of your dorm room, realizing it was the time you and your date had agreed to meet at the entrance by. 

You walked gracefully through the halls, a large smile adorning your face. Your heels tapped softly against the ground. You neared the entrance, your breath becoming shallow from the nerves. 

Then you saw Becca, she was wearing a beautiful Maroon dress. She looked absolutely breath taking.

"Hey!— oh my gosh." Becca looked at you, her jaw dropping. 

"You look stunning! Like some type of goddess...." She said barely above a whisper.

"Becca! Stop, you can't be talking, I forgot how to breathe the moment I saw you." You hugged her.

You were about to continue praising her and her beauty, but before you could comment you heard someone call your name.

"Y/n..wow.." he said, just loud enough for you to hear.

You turned around to see your date, who was wearing a very clean red and black suit. 

"Oh my gosh hi! Sorry for being a tad late, I lost track of time while getting ready!" You made your way next to your date, not before Becca gave you a sly smile and a push, leaving to go with her specimen she had chose for the night 

"It's okay.., you look amazing." He had said, taking your arm into his. He began to lead you into the ballroom.

"Thank you, I must say, you cleaned up nice." You smiled sweetly at him.

You and him entered the large room full of people, everything was elegant and royal, not a single speck of dust on anything.

You looked around the large room as your date led you down the stairs, you couldn't lie, you felt like a princess. The beautiful architecture of the room, complimented by your stunning dress, felt like something straight out of a fairy tale.

Once you had made it to the bottom of the staircase, you excused yourself away from your date in an attempt to go find Becca again. 

You stumbled past groups of people, many of them were couples having a romantic moment. 

You tried your best not to run into anybody, you dodged dancing bodies and nearly jogged across the dance floor.

You almost missed him.

You almost walked right by him.

You almost could've saved yourself the heartbreak.

But no you saw it—him with some random Hufflepuff girl. 

The way he whispered in her ear, the way she giggled a little too sweetly, everything. 

It all made you wanna cry—or throw up, which one that would be you weren't quite sure about yet. 

"Y/n?" Theodore came beside you and patted your back.

"Theo-Theodore, I thought Mattheo wasn't coming to the dance?" You struggled to get your words out as your eyes darted between the scene before you and Theodore. 

"Oh—uh yeah, he wasn't gonna originally, but some girl asked him and I guess he took a liking to her because usually he just brushes everyone off." Theo answered.

"Oh, I see, I just came to say hello. I'll be on my way now." Before Theodore could argue with your strange behavior you turned your back and walked as quickly as you could back to were your date was. 

You abandoned the idea of going to find Becca, you couldn't accidentally run into Mattheo and his.. friend again.

Instead you decided that distracting yourself with your date would be the best thing for your heart at the moment.

"Hey, sorry , I just saw a friend and got distracted." You said, out of breath.

"Oh. Don't even sweat it, I'm just glad you didn't run away and not come back." He joked, dragging you towards the dance floor. You couldn't help but laugh at his bubbly personality. It was a nice change of speed.

"I hope you like to dance." His hands fell onto your hips, yours made their way to his shoulders.

"I actually hate it." You smiled at him. 

"How unfortunate." Your smile grew when he matched your energy. You nearly forgot what you had seen a couple moments ago.

But alas, you didn't.

You could feel your chest tightening up, the tears bordering you waterline. Just thinking about him touching that girl in any way made you want to breakdown.

"Ex.—excuse me." You tried to excuse yourself as politely as you could. 

You didn't want your date too see you like this, vulnerable, heartbroken.

You urgently walked towards any door in your line of sight. When you finally found one, you ran through it. 

You just couldn't escape him, no matter how hard you tried. He was at every single corner you turned.

You nearly groaned when you saw him propped up over the balcony, smoking of course. 

He hasn't seemed to notice you, still looking out at the stars. 

You couldn't do it anymore, you couldn't spend one more fucking second acting like you weren't in love with him. 

The sad part was you'd rather be his friend than him hate you and be nothing at all. As long as he thought about you, you'd be okay. 

That's what you had been telling yourself, but you couldn't hold onto that lie anymore. 

"Mattheo." You croaked out behind him.

His head shot to the side, looking you dead in the eyes. 

"Angel… what're you doing out here."  He looked back out to the stars, unable to make eye contact. 

"I can't do it anymore."  You said shakily.

He turned his full body around this time, his eyes a dark brown. He blew the smoke out of his mouth, the wind pushing it in the opposite direction.

"I can't keep pretending I don't feel this way.., do you know how hard it was to watch you talk to that girl?" You nearly cried out.

"All the girls you fuck with and then bring them to shit like this, I cant keep lying to myself —wishing that it was me instead of her."

You were on the brink of gasping for air, your head pounded. You couldn't believe you had suppressed these emotions for so long. Every single time you went to Mattheo's dorm, you could barely restrain yourself from kissing him. 

Before you could continue on with your speech 

Mattheo had forced you against the wall. 

His lips met yours in a harsh collision. In an almost immediate reaction, your body responded to his actions, kissing him back with just as much need and hurry.

"You don't get to fucking do that."  He pulled back from your lips, still making sure to keep his face mere inches from yours.

"Every single day, I'd sit there and watch you talk to this new guy, I couldn't do shit about it— I wouldn't let myself do shit about it."

“I knew you deserved so much better than some lousy asshole like me, angel.” His hand held a firm grip on your hips, his other still had its place on the stone wall. 

"It took everything in me not to punch that fucker in the face when I saw him look at you, but I knew you wouldn't want that." You melted beneath his gaze.

His kisses trailed down your jawline.

"During second year, when I went to the dance, I saw you there with Draco, I nearly killed him right after. I couldn't bear to see you with anyone other than myself.. so I wouldn't go, I knew I wouldn't be able to handle it so I never went to another ball again." He gently caressed your cheek with his thumb.

"Until this year." He mumbled softly in between the kisses he was leaving on your neck.

He brought his face back up to yours, his eyes stormy and clouded with something darker than just simple need.

"What'd he say to you? What did he call you?" Mattheo asked with a dark shimmer in his eyes, one you were hoping was just from the moon.

You swallowed harshly, you hadn't realized how dry your mouth truly was. 

"He just said I looked nice—" 

"Nice? You look fucking ravishing. I've never met a girl as beautiful as you, never once in my life seen a girl who could compare anywhere near you...That's why I call you angel you know...,because even if an angel walked by, my eyes would still be glued on you."

His gentle voice tickled your ears, and your cheeks warmed up beneath him.

"You are my angel."

He kissed you again, only this time it was more gentle. His lips held no rush, they were soft and comforting. 

You were the one to pull back this time, smiling sweetly up at him. He pulled you from against the wall, leaving the two of you in the center of the balcony, under the sparkling stars.

"I can't believe we've been friends all these years, and neither of us made a move."

He spun you around under the moon light, the beautiful sky knocking the breath out of you.

"Hey matty..?”You whispered once he had began to hold you in his arms gently.

"Yes angel?" He matched your tone, the sweet nickname you gave him made his chest tighten up.

"I love you." You closed your eyes, shutting them slowly.

"I love you... I always thought I'd never be the type to say that so freely, guess I just needed to meet the right person." He swayed the two of you lightly, finding a rhythm in the midnight winds. 

"Of course it's you... 

It's always been you."

[lucimaaie]

ellie as spiderwoman hcs ✧.* au

a/n- honestly was just an excuse for me to watch spiderman again and i took it, kind of switch between would’ve and did idk babes im just having fun atp

playlist | spidey masterlist

she'd have lost her mom at a young age and been placed with joel, who she never gets along with at first, thinking he's just a bil ol meanie who wanted an extra check every month.

that was until he showed he cared, not through hugs and affection in the traditional sense, but making sure she did her homework, picking her up everyday, getting her out of her room, checking on her when she'd been too quiet. "you okay, kiddo?" and "i heard talking helps." he'd say as he leaned on the door frame. eventually, she couldn't help but love him.

absolutely a nerd. though, when she got teased, she didn't exactly back down as expected which landed her in the detention a few times and some talking-to's. but she won and defended herself. no one could be mad at her for that. still, she was smart. she was going to be an astronaut after all. though that dream died in middle school.

high school came and she tried to straighten up. no more fighting bullies, even if they deserved it. she was better than that. she would get an internship, the internship that would line everything up, get her a scholarship so she could study aerospace engineering, get rich and get joel out of the old house on a patch of land with however many sheep he wanted. the same internship that got her bitten by a radioactive spider and shooting webs out her wrists.

words could not describe how much she worried joel when she woke up the day after, crushing her alarm clock, breaking the sink, the shower rack, everything. she skipped that day, hanging out on the rooftop of the house while joel was away stuck between having a panic attack from the sensory overload and telling someone, anyone. she decided on testing them out which earned her quite a few bruises joel luckily chalked up to another fight. "we gotta talk about this fighting thing sometime." she'd roll her eyes, saying something snarky before limping up the stairs. "say what you want but i win," "i heard that!"

also sidebar: ellie as a new yorker...whew. honestly ellie as anything- anyway.

hours or research ensue on cross-species genetics, spiderbites, different types of spiders, everything that made her feel disgusting. she slammed her laptop closed, crushing the poor thing.

it felt like there were a million things to do with her newfound powers but the only two on her mind was impress dina and swing from the rooftops. c’mon, she was 16 with the powers of a freaking spider. who said saving people would the first thing on her mind? she felt powerful, even weirder than she already felt but still powerful.

it was terrible, watching joel get more and more disappointed in her as she got distracted. “i’m a good kid! i just got distracted, gimmie a break.” “i have given you plenty. more than i should’ve. and that’s on me. that's my mistake to make you think that coming home late and fighting and blowing me off is okay.”

“i can't help how i turned out! don't blame me for being a shitty dad.” she yelled before slamming the door and stalking off into who knows where. she didn't even mean it, she was just stressed, she never meant any of it. hours later, she’d wish those words never came out her mouth.

she'd hoped she was having some cruel nightmare when she saw joel laid out on the pavement. "some help me! c-call an ambulance. don't just fucking stand there-" her voice was raw as she screamed out. "c'mon, don't die on me. y-you can't. i'm sorry? is that what you wanna hear? i'm sorry."

she hated the looks of pity, everyone's soft voices. people who never once talked to her suddenly caring. it was all fake. they didn't know her and they sure and hell didn't know joel.

she became another person for a while. quieter, more closed off. sometimes snappy. laser focused on finding the low-life took joel from her. that's when she started wearing the mask. the basic concept of it anyway and it caught on with the people, more than she imagined. ellie scoffed at the name spider-woman at first, thinking it was ridiculous. she wasn't some circus performer, she was just trying to find the killer.

dina as her mj, reaching out to her after joel’s death, inviting her over for dinner, talking to her in class, all of it. it wasn’t the same disingenuous pity she hated, she could feel she cared. so she allowed her feelings to fester. being with her actually helped. it was one more thing to balance with school and the internship and her mission, but it was more person in her life. she needed that.

one day ellie went running towards the trouble. not because joel's killer was there or cause of some adrenaline rush, but because she needed to do something. to not be helpless for once. she wasn't helpless. she hadn't felt completely in control of her body as she webbed a whole bridge back together and pulled cars back onto the surface, but in the end it was a like a high. it still ached to see kids running to their parents and everyone running to their families, but they were all safe. she did that. and that felt better than getting revenge and letting it suck the life out of her. so she'd wear the spandex and the mask and go by the stupid name. only cause it meant something now.

thank you for reading!

[bluesidez]

HEY POOKS. Could you write a DBF!Miguel x dancer!reader. He just loves to watch her dance in competitions and recitals and helps her practice her routine by counting out 8’s for her <333

( maybe he can give reader a reward for doing so well but idk 🤭 )

[Rehearsal]

lab tester: Anonymous Participant (Hi @snails-doodles22) 🩻

summary: Miguel keeps you grounded as you prepare for a dance competition. 

content warning: age gap (abeg she’s 21+), secret relationship, fluff, like two suggestive?? lowkey explicit scenes so MINORS BEWARE, a few thoughts of frustration/failure but nothing serious just the thoughts of an artist

word count: 1.9k, halfway proofread

a/n: Hi hi!! This one was really a challenge for me!! and Idk if I’ll write DBF again ngl Nonetheless, I hope you enjoy it! I leaned more on the age gap aspect of the relationship and pulled from how I felt when practicing for my own recitals/competitions 🤠! (I get extremely snappy and mean lol)

A Grand Adage (as best as I, not a professional ballerina but I practiced for 3 years, can explain) is a slower dance move where you stretch your leg to the front, side, and back without losing your balance. You also have to switch legs…I think. It looks like it takes a LOT of core strength, especially without a partner.

I don’t think I mention it in the story, but I’m imagining this Miguel to have salt and pepper hair, but like, in its early stages. So only a few strands of gray. 

“Damn it.”

The music started to sound more and more jaded as you failed another Grand Adage after powering through the more fast-paced part of your routine. 

You don’t know why you had the bright idea to add the most pain-inducing ballet moves to your contemporary piece, but you were starting to hate yourself for it. It was supposed to represent a crash and burn of rushing perfection which was ironic because you were feeling those emotions tenfold.

“You’re not going to get it if you keep trying to force it like that.” You heard Miguel from across the room and the music finally stopped. “It’s a pause between those last two counts. You know this, chiquita.”

You huffed out a chuckle as you got up, “Knowing and doing are two different things. I know what’s coming, which is why I keep anticipating it and messing it up.”

“The studio is all yours for a few more hours,” Miguel sighed. “Take a breath and try it again.”

“That’s so easy for you to say. You’re not the one busting your ass,” you mumbled as you got back into your starting position. 

Miguel crossed his arms, head leaning on the wall above the barre, “You want to say that again?”

You dropped your arms and stared at him, face blank. 

After a minute or so of you going silent, he unfolded his arms and beckoned you towards him. 

You dragged your feet to get to him, hands hugging yourself. 

“I know you want this to be perfect, but snapping at me isn’t going to help that.” His hands made their way to the back of your thighs, rubbing up and down the tightened muscles. 

“I’m sorry, I just-” you rubbed your eyes with your palms. “The competition is so soon and I keep fucking the routine up.”

“And you’ve also done it perfectly countless other times. You’ve got this! I know you do. I’ve seen how much work you’ve put into dancing and that’s not going to change.”

“But Miguel-”

“But nothing. I’ve seen how you become a new person on the stage. You demand the attention of your audience in a way that your peers can’t. You’re captivating and alluring so I’m not going to sit here and let you think otherwise.”

You look at him with a face that says “I know you’re right, but I don’t want you to be,” and just fall onto his lap, wallowing in his arms while you breathe in his cologne. 

He nuzzled you on the head, hands patting at your ass, hands warm and firm through your tights, “Now can you try again for me?”

“Can I have a kiss?” you say, lips rivaling a rubber duckie. 

He chuckles at you but obliges, heart too soft when it comes to you. 

You get up with new ambition, taking a deep breath as you stride back to the middle of the room. 

“I’m going to count out loud for you this time, is that ok?”

“Yeah,” you reply, arms molding into a sharp form. 

When the music starts this time, you hone in on Miguel’s voice, taking leaps and turns with his timbre. Your heart thumps all the same, but your brain isn’t as loud. 

As the Grand Adage comes again, Miguel’s voice stays calm, never wavering. You tighten your core and lift your leg high, hands framed beautifully and foot pointed sharp as you hold your arms above your head. As you bring your leg back down to begin to turn, your heart almost stops when your body remains stable and strong. You can’t believe it but try to keep the piece's emotion steady. 

You switch legs without trouble, eyes catching Miguel watching your form in the mirror. His face is serious but you can’t hear that in his voice, making you feel fuzzy. You keep up the pace, repeating the same move but gearing up to do an Illusion.

Like a flash, you bring your leg down and bend your body, foot spinning swiftly to perform the trick. Your heartbeat is roaring in your ears as you move through the rest of the routine, mind too excited from your success to completely portray the ending emotions of dance. 

Once you finish, you’re quick to get out of your position, face lit up as you turn to Miguel. When you run to him, you’re screaming with glee. He only stumbles a bit when you jump in his arms, body wrapped around him like a koala. 

“Miguel! Did’ya see it? Oh my god, I can’t believe it,” you laughed as he spun you around.

“I told you you could do it, amor. You just needed to get out of your head.”

“Ok ok, three more times and I think I’ll be ready to leave.”

“Well let’s get busy, chiquita. We’ve got work to do.”

You run through the routine again and again, becoming more confident each time. After every successful routine, Miguel’s praises get more and more loving. First a deep hug, then a few pecks to the lips, then a makeout session that has you squirming for more. 

“Is your dad picking you up today?” he said, lips on your neck.

You turn your nose up at the mention of him, “No, I took the bus.”

“Could have asked me to drop you off.”

“You were at work, Miggy. Didn’t want to bother you.”

“You’re never a bother,” he stopped to move his forehead to yours. “You can come over tonight. You need to relax after all of this hard work.”

“And what do I tell my dad when he asks where I am?” your eyes pan from his eyes to his lips, fingers reaching up to go through his hair. 

“Tell him you’re at a girlfriend’s house.”

You twist your mouth to the side, pretending to think.

“How are you planning to relax me?”

“A hot bath.”

You snickered, knowing better than to believe that was all he was planning to do, but taking his word for it. 

Hours later when you were laid on your back, hands gripping the sheets below you and Miguel holding your legs up as he stroked deep inside, your suspicions were confirmed. Your skin was soft from the bath and your muscles were like jelly after he spent an hour massaging every tight muscle out of you. The room was full of him, his smell surrounding you, and the noises of him attending to your every need. With every cry of his name, he brought you closer to the horizon. 

On the day of your competition, you didn’t even look at Miguel before you went on, nerves too bad. If he gave you a pep talk, internally, you would be appreciative, but externally, you might tell him to leave you the fuck alone. 

Knowing how you get, he supported you in the best way he could by sending you messages and a light breakfast in the morning. 

“Break a leg, chiquita”

“Not literally of course”

“I’ll be waiting for you once it’s over”

“With a surprise :)”

It was enough to fill you with anticipation, ready to give it all on the floor.

Once your number was called, you went to the center and got into position. The crowd was dark enough to feel like it was just you in the room, but your heart knew otherwise with how fast it was beating. 

When the music starts, it’s like Miguel’s voice is a soundtrack playing through your memory. You can’t see him, but you can feel him in the crowd cheering you on. Your feet move across the floor, body tightening and relaxing when needed. Your face wears a frustrated expression, portraying the sentiment of everything falling out of control. Your leaps and turns come one after another moving your form across the stage. 

The Grand Adage comes to you like lightning, you don’t even notice you’re doing it until it happens. The muscle memory takes over and you transition to the Illusion like it's nothing. Your mind wanders as you go through to the end of the routine, finishing strongly with your pose on the floor.

The cheers of the audience are what bring you back to reality. A feeling of relief washes over you as you stand and bow, smiling brightly. 

Standing with the other dancers from your category, you don’t expect the judges to call your name for first place, so when they all turn to look at you, you feel like you might have walked out in your underwear by accident. 

It isn’t until you’re handed a bouquet of flowers and a trophy that it dawns on you that your hard work has paid off. The check was no measly amount of money either. 

Looking out to the crowd, you can see Miguel standing up with his hands cupped over his mouth as he yells. Your family is standing next to him cheering as well. You wave at them, jumping up and down in excitement. Only you can see the wink Miguel gives you. 

When you meet them out in the lobby, you have to stop yourself from keeping your attention on Miguel. 

“You did amazing, honey,” your dad says, squeezing the life out of you. “That flip thing? I don’t know how you did it, but wow!”

“It’s called an Illusion,” Miguel shakes his head. “Keep up.”

“What are you, her coach or something?”

“C’mon you guys,” your mom fusses. “Don’t start bickering in the building. At least wait until we get dinner.”

“‘M gonna ride with Miguel,” you say to them. 

Knowing how much you like his car, your parents think nothing of it and walk out to their own car. 

Once they’re out the door, he turns and gives you a deep kiss, “You did such a good job. I’m so proud of you.”

“I just remembered what you said. Kept it in the back of my mind while I performed.”

He smiled and wrapped his hands around your waist, “Yeah?”

You nod and bring his lips to yours again. 

“Where’s my surprise?”

“Always so impatient.”

“You wouldn’t like me any other way.”

“Tienes rázon,” Miguel chuckled. 

Miguel brings a sparkly gift bag to your attention, placing it in your hands. You reach into the bag, tissue paper falling to the floor. You pull out an envelope and a long velvet box. 

You open the box, eyes glittering when you see the necklace inside. 

“Miguel, this is adorable!” 

“Here,” he takes the necklace out of the box. “Let me help you put it on.”

You turn and focus your attention on the envelope, fingers sliding under the sealed flap. 

Your breath halts when you pull the tickets out.

“To Paris?”

You turn to him once your necklace is latched together, eyes teary from happiness.

“You’ve been doing so amazing, I wanted to treat you to an amazing trip.”

“How much did this cost?”

“Nothing that you should worry your head about.”

You crowd his space, kissing his face all over, “Thank you so much, Miguel.”

“Of course. Anything for my girl.”

“I don’t want to go out to dinner now,” you sigh dramatically.

“Yeah? You know we can’t bail, though.”

“Not even if I give my thanks to you in the car?”

Miguel bit the inside of his cheek, watching you grin at him. He’s really way too soft when it comes to you. 

“Vamos.”

As always, like, reblog, and COMMENT. Let me know how you guys feel! 🩵

[cameoliob]

what are your headcanons for kallus and jovan? how did they get together? who fell first and whose heart broke first? do they still hate each other when kallus joins the rebellion or do they simply act like the pettiest bitches towards each other? enquiring minds want to know

ANON THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME AN EXCUSE TO TALK ABOUT THIS IVE BEEN WAAIITTTIINNNGG

Before I get into this I have to legally preface that 1. I’m a Kallus from the lower levels truther + I operate off the assumption that he does not have any family and that plays a decent role in what's going on 2. We dont know alot about Jovans personality so I lowkey just go off vibes but in my brain, teenage him is starry-eyed, a little naive, but SO kind. Older him is a little bit of a douche (not terrible, just the kind of guy that you have to scoff at whenever they talk too much). 

Okay I have a whole headcannoned timeline so im gonna lay this out for u

It's 19 BBY, the empire just started enlisting and all the rich Coruscanti kids are FIGHTING for a chance to go to the academy because “wow that sounds so much more fun than regular university.” Jovan is a part of this demographic. 

So you’ve got this whole class of rich kids doing rich kid things, and Jovan is having a great time; it’s the fourth week of school, he’s found his friend group, he gets along great with his bunk mates, everything is fantastic.

Except theres just this one… fucking guy…

This guy is in, like, half of Jovans classes and Jovan just can’t stop thinking about him because where in stars name did this skinny, scrappy, snappy, kid with a gnarly side eye come from???? Why is he so sickly looking???? And so mean????

And Jovan’s always been a curious guy, he wants to figure out what this guy’s deal is so he, of course, takes it upon himself to befriend this Edward Cullen looking ass dude. Easier said than done; Jovan finds out very quickly that Kallus does not trust easily and it takes at least three weeks of Jovan forcing his friendship on him (inviting him to sit with him in the mess hall, offering to help with assignments, sitting next to him in class, ect.) for Kallus to hold a full conversation with him. 

From there, though, it gets easier. Turns out that Kallus is, quite possibly, the coolest guy Jovan has ever met. He doesn't gaf about what people think about him, he’s gotten into fist fights before (real ones, not sparring!), he fucking parties, he fucks, he can hotwire a speeder, he’s so naturally smart, and cunning, and resourceful– Jovan is completely entranced by this guy. 

^^^(completely entranced by this guy.. I never said Jovan had good taste)

In the meantime, Jovan helps Kallus out with some of the pre-req classes needed for their first year, because as cool as he is, Kallus is not good at physics. 

By the end of their first year at the Academy, Jovan and Kallus become very close. It’s that kind of friendship between guys that, if you saw it from an outsider's perspective, you’d be like, “oh… are they..?? Do they..????? What???” but tbh they don't even think about it because they’re too busy being stupid

Now, the imps do NOT like taking days off, BUUUUT all those rich families donating to the academy do, so I imagine that– at least in the first few years of the empire– the academy had a short, 3 or so week long summer break. 

So we get to break, and Kallus is like “oh wait, I don’t have anywhere to go over break, guess I’ll just rough it out on the streets for a few weeks ig. Nothing new tbh.” And Jovan is like, “What???? No???? You’re not doing that????” and Jovan invites Kallus to tag along on his family vacation (idk where they go, maybe like Naboo or smth, I didn't think that far). Kallus obviously accepts. 

So they go on this vacation, and Jovan is thinking to himself, Waiiiiiittttt a minute………. I actually have wanted him so bad for like 3 months. Maybe it was a bad idea to invite him, like I’m gonna blow my cover fuckuckufckufcjukcf.  But he’s like not trying to do anything about it because he’s all nervous. But THEN, last week of vacation Kallus is like. “I actually think that you should let me kiss u on the mouth.” and Jovan is like “okay bbg say less.” (Jovan fell first if that wasn’t clear)

(This situation is about to get ALOT gayer)^^^

AND THEN THE BREAKUP

They graduated the academy a year prior, Kallus has been doing his ISB training, Jovan has been doing whatever tf you do to become a lieutenant. They’ve been together for four-ish years atp. 

Kallus is SO locked in with his ISB training. Like he was a dedicated student before (he was top of his class for a reason), but this is borderline obsession. He’s never home, always working, always tired, ect ect. In the meantime, Jovan is climbing the ranks and he is lowkey kind of power tripping over it. He’s getting kind of entitled, a little passive aggressive, and is not really putting effort in tbh.

So Jovan is all annoyed because Kallus is always at work and he literally just wants to hang out with his boyfriend. Tbh, he thinks that Kallus is getting way too ambitious way too quickly.

And Kallus is all annoyed because Jovan isn’t giving him any good reasons to leave work, in fact, Jovan has been grating his nerves lately because he doesn’t do anything. Jovan isn’t ambitious enough. 

The resentment is BUIILLLDDDIINNNGGG

The night they break up is FUCKING CRAZY, OKAY

Jovan picks a fight because he fucking feels like it and Kallus is not having ANY OF IT. Huge blowout fight ensues; Jovan says something classist or something, Kallus calls him an “entitled, prissy twat,” Jovan tells Kallus with the “you wouldn’t have even graduated without my help,” Kallus fuckinf kicks the wall or something, Jovan starts yelling about the drywall, Kallus is like “okay, fuck you AND your goddamn drywall,” and JUST LEAVES

The next day Jovan comms Kallus like “bbg pleapelaleapsleapsleaplsea I messed up im sorry plzplzpzpzlpzlzpzlzp” and Kallus ignores the hell out of him. 

Kallus is pissed because tbh if things just went better, he honest-to-god would have married that man, but noOOOooOOooO, Jovan had to be STUPID

AND THEN SIXTEEN YEARS LATER KALLUS ARRESTS THAT HO and he is SOOOO HAPPY ABOUT IT

But then Jovan shows up in the rebellion and Kallus is so annoyed. 

Because for 1. He is kind of prissy and self important and most people would agree with that 2. No way they ended up in the same place after 18 years, that is so bs, and 3. It’s so awkward that Jovan has all of this info about who Kallus was growing up, and the life he lived before going into the ISB– in fact, he probably knows more than anyone in the Ghost crew just because he was there– and that is so mortifying

Jovan is so stoked

Because for 1. Kallus did all that work in the ISB only to end up a rebel anyways and that is hilarious 2. He has so much mildly embarrassing material about him in his back pocket. But tbh it’s kind of bittersweet for him because Kallus is his One that got away (He was planning on going RING SHOPPING, and then he got BROKEN UP WITH, what the FUCK) and he always reasoned with it by thinking that Kallus was irrevocably changed by the empire, and the Kallus he fell in love with wasn’t going to come back. BUT THEN IT TURNS OUT THAT HE IS BACK– yeah, he’s got a beard now, and he pretends to be all serious, but he’s the same snarky, cunning, side eyeing idiot that he fell for. And he knows he can't have him because that train has LEFT THE STATION

^^(This art is old so its a little jank but shhhhhhhhh, its the vibes that matter)

So he obviously deals with this by selling embarrassing pictures of Kallus from their academy years to Sabine, because that’s probably the best revenge he’s going to get.

Kallus is obviously over him, and has been for a LONG time, he just doesn't like Jovans personality, and Jovan kinda wants Kallus back but apparently that's not an option so they do end up creating a dynamic where they are so petty to each other when they get the chance. (Which is not often because the rebellion is big and if they can avoid each other, they will.)

[sparklyskies0]

𝙃𝙚𝙮 𝙅𝙖𝙣𝙚 ౨ৎ c.s

pairings: pregnant!fem!reader x fwb!chris

( in which)

warnings/dislcaimers: sensitive topics‼️ unexpected/unwanted pregnancy, idk what else, etc

9:23 pm.

You quite literally couldn't believe your eyes. You thought you were seeing things. But the pink lines were clear as day, two simple lines that weren’t faded even a little bit to leave the feeling that it could be false. You were pregnant. So fucking pregnant.

The silence lingered in the bathroom, your heart pounded in your chest. Alone in your apartment with a positive test on the counter, and no one to cry to. Eventually after a couple minutes of trying to process it you began to laugh. That was the only reaction you could possibly make out right now.

I mean it’s ridiculous—right? there’s no way you’re pregnant. this is not real. you were so careful. always pestering the person you were sleeping with to wear rubber.

chris hated condoms, but for you he wore them because he knew you wouldn’t fuck him without it. though he would’ve much rather hit it raw and rely on his pull out skills and your birth control. But you began to remember the time when the stupid condom broke… and you told him to keep going. You truly didn’t think anything of it, the universe knew you didn’t want children. You weren’t sure if it was now or never but you knew there was no way something so insane can happen so suddenly. You were wrong.

So now here you are, laughing like an insane person sliding down the bathroom wall. Face in your hands “no fucking way” you laughed hysterically. you almost couldn’t breathe, you felt like the walls were closing in. Complete distraught and shock rippled through you. Surprised had suddenly became an understatement. All the emotions hit you at once when you feel a tear trickle down your cheek. You sniffled, and let the rest fall down. Sobs eventually filling the bathroom. Your heart was beating so fast that your body began to jump slightly with every flutter.

You needed to tell someone, immediately. The first person you can think of was who was responsible, Chris.

You needed to call him, say something. But what is there to say? how do you even approach a situation like this? you two aren't even together, you do things couples do. But are far from it--just friends, who hook up from time to time. There was no way in hell that he was going to react well or even at all. He's so nonchalant and dismissive whenever anything slightly serious comes up. So why on earth is he the person to go to right now?. The answer is pretty clear, much like the pregnancy test right in front of you.

You manage to slow down your heavy breathing and quiet sobs, letting out a conflicted sigh before sitting up from your place on the ground.

The Next Day, 12:43 pm.

"so are you going to say anything??" you break the silence, back against your kitchen island with your arms crossed as you stood in front of a shell-shocked chris who's jaw is in the pits of hell.

You called him over to tell him the news, thinking it was best you told him in person. And not just because you wanted to see the priceless expression on his face. It's been about almost 6 minutes and he has yet to say a word. You're starting to feel a little concerned.

"chris, seriously. anything could help right now" you speak again

He seems to have snapped out of it and opens his mouth to speak. "its mine right?"

As if your eyes couldn't get wider. You wish you could say you cant believe him right now but you totally could, typical chris. failing to comprehend the obvious.

"are you fucking serious right now?!" you say, slightly snappy. wanting to immediately chuck something at his face. He shakes his head, his hand lifting up his hat to run his fingers through his hair. You can see the sudden change in his whole demeanor. Despite the dumb question, he knew what it was. It is definitely his but he was just hoping for another answer.

"yes chris, its yours why else would i tell you.." you say, your voice softing as you step back into distress and shock mode. You cant really get mad at him, not right now at least.

"fuck..." he ran both hands over his face. A huff leaving his mouth. "are you good though? you okay?" he asks. You cant help but melt at his random concern. If he's not taking this well he couldn't imagine the kind of wreck you were last night. You sigh softly, "i honestly don't fucking know.."

"i mean we..we arent even..-yeah i know." you began to go on but he cuts off you off.

"we're not together, yeah...i-are w-are you, k-keeping it?" he asks sort of hesitantly, like he was contemplating whether it was his place.

That question hit you like a freight train.. You hadn't even thought about it, you've been so caught up in the fact that you just found out you were pregnant in the first place less than 24 hours ago. You never thought kids were in the cards for you. You never imagined yourself as being a mom or being nurturing and maternal. You just don't see yourself as the type. Which is why it makes no sense something like this would even happen.

As if that's not bad enough you also happen to be knocked up by chris, the most noncommittal guy you've ever met. who seems to lack the ability to keep himself alive let alone a baby.

"i don't know..." you feel your eyes begin to burn slightly, signaling the tears that are begging to fall as you both find yourselves forcingly looking deeper into the situation at hand. Desperately trying to find an answer to the hardest question of all. You feel like everything is happening so fast and the room is spinning.

The simple thought and thousand others clouding your brain and you can't help but feel dizzy. Like you could faint at any moment. Chris notices immediately, standing up straight, grabbing both sides of your arms. "yo, you good?

"come, sit..sit down" he leads you to the couch. You let out a long breath as he sits close to you. His arm wrapped around your shoulder as he rubs it repeatedly to comfort you. Secretly trying to bury and fight off his own urge to hyperventilate for your sake.

"look at me.." he removes his arm from around you to take your hand in his on top of your lap. "whatever you decide to do...whatever you want, I'm here. no matter what. I'm not leaving you alone, not right now, okay? i got you.." he affirms

You feel yourself calm down at his words, but uncertainty still lingers in the air.

Authors Note

made this randomly

i told yall i love pregnancy storylinessss

also anons keep requesting I promise

i’ve working on it!!!!

xoxo paris

[thewritersofdeceased]

Hey , Idk if you're still writing TBP x reader , but if you do , can you make HCS with them being in love with a tsundere reader ? If you read this your writing is really cool ✨

Hey! Of course I can do this!! Tysm about my writing! <3 I'm sorry if these are kinda ooc or the way I wrote a tsundere kinda vibe! It's a lil difficult for me, but I tried!! ^^"

I didn't know if you wanted Griffin, so I excluded him :(( sorry griffin lovers!

ENJOY!

THE BLACK PHONE BOYS WITH A TSUNDERE READER :)

FINNEY BLAKE

Finney's probably confused at first, at least when first trying to conceal his feelings!

Poor boy is confused why you seem so mean at first

Overtime, he learns that you're actually nice!

Like the time you gave him something from your snack bag after finding out he didn't get food

Probably asks Bruce or Robin why you're acting "rudeish" to him around people

Though he knows you like him, at least when you had confessed to him over it!

ROBIN ARELLANO

Robin thought of it as a challenge.

Someone with a harsh interior acting as if they didn't like him?

Now that sounded like fun to do.

He tries to impress you, even if you deny that he "impressed you"

No matter what, he doesn't exactly mind you being a tsundere, it just gives him more of the chance to tease you

BRUCE YAMADA

Another confused boy

Childhood friends most likely, but he isn't used to this side of you exactly

Probably tries to ignore the facade and get actual answers

When you confess, he then realizes your a tsundere

You def show up to his games and act all mean and rude but buys him something to show your proud or what not

VANCE HOPPER

Vance hates this "tsundere vibe" your giving off.

It honestly pisses him off and he gets all annoyed with it

Kinda is snappy with you, seeing as he himself is def a tsundere.

Hates the way you switch between being rude to nice in only a couple seconds

When he gets an answer why you're acting like this, maybe he's a little more relaxed about it

BILLY SHOWALTER

Very confused!

Like- he knows what a Tsundere is and how they act, but why are you acting like one?

Around him mainly

He mainly hopes you don't act like one around his mama

Talks to Bruce and everyone about it until he realizes you can actually be nice and caring.

[astro-lmk-enjoyer]

LMK rant!! (It’s a long one + a story/fanfic)

I like the concept that MK isn’t Wukong type immortal. But Macaque’s version of immortal, like, consider the fact that MK, as a celebrity, has a cash number on his head for all the demons and hard core criminals to exploit.

And MK just isn’t fazed by it at all.

He can get stab, shot, anything and he’ll walk into the restaurant and everyone will be like “OMG MK THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR CHEST”

And MK is like “oh yeah I forgot about that. There was a sale on a drink and there was no line so I just had to!” He pulls out the knife and the wound like, instantly heals? Everyone is shocked and MK is just: 😐

MK would have a HUGE price on his head in the black market, like “yeah this is MK The Monkie Kid’s headband which he wore throughout s1-s2 ep4” or something like that idk.

And MK will just throw the knife aside and go up to his room, like nothing happened, and check his to-do list coz, come on, MK has to train with Wukong AND Macaque and have mandatory hangouts with his friends and work (only part-time now) at Pigsy’s. Boy has a lot on his mind, which he likes! He has to keep busy so he doesn’t have time to think.

That to-do list had eat and sleep on it but those two rarely get done and that’s okay! MK doesn’t want to sleep anyway, every time he sleeps she is there (whether you take that as LBD or Nuwa is up to you). In fact everyone is there in his dreams but they’re not really there you know? They’re there but their ether died, dying or have a life threatening injury’s . Every time he sleeps he see how thing could have gone differently- all the time he put their lives in danger every time he hurt them.

The time almost the whole city got mind controlled, the countless times the city got destroyed and rebuilt only to get destroyed again and again by his mistakes- The Spider Queen, LBD, The Fire- The Celestial Realm- Asure Lion- AGAIN AND AGAIN HES HURT PEOPLE no mater what he does it always leads to pain! Not to mention the time HE LITERALLY COMMITTED SUICIDE TO SAVE THE WORLD what about his friends!? They almost got erased because of him! And he died again because that snake demon pushed him into the pillar. NOT TO MENTION THE IMPENDING DOOM OF “The Chaos beyond” AND ALL THAT. OOOH VERY NICE OF YOU TO TELL ME THAT BUT WHAT DO YOU MEAN. EXPLAIN.

Huh. Got sidetracked there. Anyway-

Instead of sleeping,MK walks around all night, he feels he’s looking for something but he doesn’t know what, someone to help? His sanity? His will to live? Those therapy sessions he should be getting? He doesn’t know really. But it keeps him awake and the city is pretty big so he doesn’t have to worry about running out of places to look, so it works. And when the sun starts to rise he goes home and sneaks back into his room.

The lack of sleep starts getting to him though. He’s more snappy, annoyed, all that good stuff. Everyone else knows and try’s to not give him stuff to do so whatever adrenaline he’s on finally calms down and he gets some sleep.

MK doesn’t see it like that though.

In his mind they have finally noticed how he’s useless now. Now that he’s for filled his purpose of saving the universe he is no longer needed. They don’t need him. They hate him. He’s unwanted. No worry’s though. He’ll get out of there hair and go around helping the people of the city instead of doing what they refuse to let him do for them.

But at some point the people notice too. They stop asking him for help.

He looks awful at this point and he start to spiral a bit-

I mean if even his friends and the towns people don’t want him then, then fine! He’ll find something else to give him purpose! And to help him not sleep of cause. But sleep is something you can only out run for so long.

He runs away. You might think this seems a very strange response but MK is basically delirious by this point. He finds a spot in the wilderness where everything feels like it’s stopped. It’s so calm and peaceful, you could never imagine that this place probably had hordes of dangerous creatures pass through it.

He puts his bag down and sits, relaxing for once in a LONG time, how many days straight had he been awake for now? 4, 5, more??

He probably only sits down for a minute before he passes out of exhaustion.

He wakes up later in the day, the other probably know he’s not at home by now, they probably think he’s out in the town somewhere. But he’s not.

He doesn’t really like having to walk about with his own thoughts for too long. But eventually he reaches the edge of the forest and the sea, he doesn’t know he came here of all places. No he can’t sleep here the water is too loud right now. Perfect. Now if he could just find somewhere hidden from anyone’s line of sight he could stay there.

Walking along the shore, MK eventually finds a cove-like area. Thick trees ether side but enough wind for the waves to stay loud. Siting down he wondered what he could do to stay awake, right! The water would keep him awake and he would have to keep moving as to not get pulled out to sea!

He stripped down to his pants and hung his clothes on a tree branch so they don’t get dirty. Wading in the water he found that the sting of the coldness made him a touch more awake. It was nice out here- oops. He slipped on some seaweed and the waves pushed him over. Now that he was under the water it seamed like a different place, the fish dove in and out of the seaweed. He reached out to touch the floor of the sea, he could feel the sand and the roots of the seaweed if he focused enough. Though it felt like he there was something he was forgetting-

Oh fu- he forgot to hold his breath! Bubbles flow past his face as he realised and he pushed his way the surface. But right before a thought came to him, what if he stayed there? Under the water? He could just disappear and no one would know where he went… nonsense that was. Once he was out the water he coughed up a couple handfuls of water and headed back to shore. That was enough water for him.

What was that strange thought anyway? I mean, thinking about that would keep his mind away from thinking about other things… why would he think that? Didn’t that count as a suicidal thought? No that’s not what that was. Was it?

A buzzing brought his attention back to his surroundings. Where was it coming from? He turned back to the trees intending to find a bee or something but no his phone in his jacket pocket was ringing. Quickly shaking most of the water off his hand he grabbed his phone. It was Pigsy. Pigsy was ringing him. It was past the start time of his shift, so it was probably to yell at him or something. He didn’t want to deal with that.

He let his phone ring out. But he rang again. MK didn’t- COULDN’T deal with that right now. He turned his phone off and throw it in the water. On second thought he shouldn’t have done that. The water wasn’t safe to be in if there was electronics in it right? But what did that mater to him for? Whatever.

He quickly got dressed and picked up his bag maybe he could read one of the two comic books he bought with him. He read both of them. Over and over till he memorised the words. This wasn’t helping. It passed some time sure but it wouldn’t last long, maybe he could redraw the comic in his own style? Yeah! That was something to do.

Just then he noticed a strange voice, it was to far away to recognise or to make out what they where saying but if there were people he had to move.

He walked- ran actually, he ran. But the voice just got closer, he recognised the voice now, a voice he could recognise anywhere, HER. Whispering right in his ear.

Did you miss me~

No! This wasn’t happening- not now!

They don’t need you anymore do they?

They-! … do they really need him?

Of course they don’t need you~ you did your purpose after all. You saved the world congrats, and in doing so you’ve hurt them beyond repair. Pigsy-

No!

Red Son-

No…

Mei-!

He tripped on a root and dropped his bag, but there was no time to pick it up, he kept running.

Look at what you’ve accomplished, what could have happened instead. I could have take the fire from Mei and been unstoppable! Not even Monkie King could-

MK tripped again but he could barely stand up again. If he could find somewhere comfortable like the grass from before maybe he could have the same dreamless sleep as he did before.

He rested his head on a tree trying to calm his breaths- everything was too overwhelming!

They hate you don’t they~

He was to focused on trying not to breath in all the world’s oxygen then on stopping the thoughts. He clucked his chest. He’d be fine. Everything would be fine.

A small movement caught his eye. A butterfly… but this one looked off for some reason? Just then the butterfly burst into a cloud of golden smoke before Monkie King appeared out of it. MK shoved himself up to his feet. His heart still pounding in his ears. Monkie King grabbed his wrist and said… something???

MK’s head pounded, he couldn’t tell whether his eyes were blurred from crying or his lightheadedness. Ether way he felt he was going to pass out. He stumbled backwards, Monkie King pulled MK towards him but all it achieved was making MK more dizzy. MK’s eyes felt heavy and he fell into Monkie King’s arms. He closed his eyes and Monkie King called out. MK felt the vibrations in the other’s chest. One hand was holding firmly onto his back and the other held his head gently.

His hands were soft. It felt… right. To be here in his arms.

And finally… MK fell in to that sweet dreamless-sleep he wanted.

Wow. Idk if it was my ADHD kicking in or something but I didn’t intend to write the start of a fanfic. Damn.

[lunar-years]

🎵Can I ask you a question?🎵😉

Do you think that Jamie Tartt was actually angry at his father or that said anger was a motivation to him? I mean, he did say that he would say “fuck you” to his father, but it seems to me that Jamie’s tendency when he’s scared or feeling vulnerable is to cover it up with snappiness and apparent anger. (Maybe I’ve just read too much fic in which this is the case idk🤷🏻‍♀️😄.) Also, back in “Two Aces,” Jamie said that “[his mother] is the reason [he] works so hard”—not that he’s doing it because he hates his dad. And in the same episode in which he says he’d tell his dad “fuck you,” he says to Georgie that he doesn’t give a shit about James anymore. I just feel like Jamie is more scared of his dad than angry, but I would truly like to hear your opinion. Thank you!

hmmm...I guess I think it's complicated? Like yeah Jamie definitely has real anger towards his dad. When he says he'd want to say 'fuck you' to his dad I believe he was being 100% genuine. I wholeheartedly think Jamie would very much like to say 'fuck you' to that man. Yet if James Sr. suddenly appeared on the pitch at that moment, I'm not Jamie would have said it to him. Wanting to say it and being able to say it are two different things. In general, I read Jamie's anger as sort of an aftermath and response to his fear/vulnerability, if that makes sense? His tendency is to freeze/shrink in on himself/make himself small/not fight back when he's actually facing his father. And Jamie knows his father and knows the signs to look for to try and read his dad's moods, and he's gotten pretty damn good at assessing his dad as soon as he enters any room to determine whether he's walking into an interaction that's going to harm him. He watches for signs that his dad's already upset, whether he's at that particular state of drunkenness that most often seems to end in violence, whether the old man is out looking for a fight. Still, he's terrified at the same time he's looking that he's missing something, that he's going to miss one of those tip offs and be caught off guard and left vulnerable or hurt or humiliated (because his dad has historically been unpredictable). And his own knowledge of himself, that he isn't going to fight back, because he never has, sits with him too. As such, he's always got his guard up when he's around his dad and there's always an air of sort of anticipatory fear along with his annoyance/irritation/exhaustion/snappishness, etc.

And then in the after, when he's had time to sit with the fear he felt, and the small way his dad always always makes him feel, *that's* when I think he gets angry. In part it's anger and (temporary) hatred directed solely at his father, because he's let Jamie down again, and he's a complete arsehole ("my dad's a dick. not much you can do with that, is there?"), and Jamie knows he's not a good dad, but then slowly that anger, more times than not, warps around in his brain and eventually gets turned inwards towards himself. More than Jamie hates his dad, Jamie hates the way he himself acts around his dad. The way we see Jamie at Wembley is so antithetical to everything Jamie normally is. So I think Jamie's always fighting an internal battle between being pissed at his dad for hitting him and being pissed that he "let himself" get hit. He doesn't even *need* his dad, right? He's Jamie fucking Tartt! He was always going to be great long before he ever met that piece of shit, and he can be fucking great now without him. Right? He doesn't even care. In fact, he wants to tell his dad fuck you! So...then why can't he tell his dad fuck you? Whenever he goes to try, the words shrivel up and die, and he's back to being that same scared kid wanting his dad's approval. Jamie hates being that kid. He can't stop being that kid. That's what has him running off to a reality tv set. That's what has him running around Amsterdam trying to bury the past. He wants to outrun the person his dad makes him. He wants to outrun himself and he never can.

So I guess I say...all of the above? Jamie's motivation and drive and work ethic ultimately comes from who JAMIE is. Sure, he's a product of both his dad's violence and anger and his mum's love and care, but Jamie is very much his own person who is motivated to become a great footballer because he wants that for himself, not for anyone else. At the same time, yes he's angry at his dad, yes he's afraid of his dad, and yes, ultimately, he loves his dad and wants to be loved by him in return. All those emotions get mixed up in his head sometimes, and all of them are a part of who he is and all of them are valid emotions.

[pepperpottes]

i think i've figured out that my problem with writing fic is actually... reading other fic

i mean, my problem is a multitude of things, particularly perfectionism and a serious lack of self-esteem and confidence in my abilities to do a good job with literally anything, but lemme tell you, reading a bunch of absolute bangers on ao3 lately has NOT helped me in that department lol

like. i've read a few lately that are just SO GOOD. the kind of good that you can't stop thinking about it for days. and that's wonderful! i love when something is so well done that i can't get it out of my head. however, i really need it to get out of my head when i sit down to write my own shit, because then this starts:

"that author characterized [insert character] here so well; I can't do that! do i even understand this character at all?"

"their prose was so beautiful and poetic and had such a strong voice; mine doesn't! it's boring and lifeless and basic and there's nothing special about it to even call it a style!"

"their dialogue was so snappy and smart and realistic; mine isn't!" (re: do I even understand this character?)

"that story was so incredibly creative and well-thought out; my ideas are just lame and i don't have the mental capacity to come up with something that good!"

and most of all:

"that piece of work made me actually feel things; there's no way i could ever manage that!"

and then i end up staring at a blank page, internally screaming at myself: COMPARISON IS THE THIEF OF JOY

and i let it steal my joy, every time.

i do this with everything, by the way. not just writing. i have this terrible vice where i always think to myself, why is this worth doing if there's so many other people out there who are better at it than me? why would someone want to look at my pictures when they could look at something prettier? why would someone want to spend time reading my writing, when much better, more creative, more well-written stories exist? why would this company want to hire me, when they can hire someone smarter and more experienced?

i know a lot of this too is that i am so wildly out of practice with anything and everything creative, and that writing is like a muscle, and if you don't use it enough it grows weak again. i know that the more i do it, the better it will be. but just. ugh. i just get mad at myself sometimes for being this way. i'm mad at myself for letting my experiences in college make me hate writing SO MUCH that i didn't do it for eight years. nearly a decade of honing my skills, nearly a decade of ideas and stories, just lost.

(which is kinda silly, because i'm not even a... serious writer? i'm writing fanfiction. like who the fuck cares)

(but perhaps i could be a serious writer someday, like i always wanted.)

(circle back to, "but why would they hire me when they could hire someone better and more talented?")

idk. i'm just tired. i'm tired of being in my own head and not allowing myself the grace to say hey, it's okay if your writing isn't Pulitzer Prize worthy. it's okay if it's not as good as someone else's. it's okay if no one reads it or no one likes it, cause its yours and you should like it, and that's all that really matters in the end.

i'm also just physically and mentally tired from life and work and society and i imagine that's a much bigger factor in all of this than i'm giving it credit for. i punch out after 8+ hours of staring at medical records on a giant, blinding screen and i'm like, what are words? what are thoughts? i don't have any

(side note, i really feel like that job in particular has sucked the life out of me entirely. i used to be creative. i used to do things i liked, even if they weren't particularly good. i used to be... well, smart. i feel like i've regressed. or maybe i was never actually that smart or creative to begin with. BUT that's another rant for another time) (can you tell i'm a former "gifted student")

anyway, this turned into a really long and unnecessary rant about my deepest insecurities, but moral of the story: maybe i should stop reading fic for a while if i actually want to get something done without feeling terrible about myself in the process.

excuse me while i go, well... not write, probably.

[lesbiannancytruther]

hey guys did you miss me i missed you

anyways rising clawing myself out of my grave to complain again because im reminded half of the st fandom is STUPID

i just saw someone say, fully and genuinely, that nancy constantly dismisses robin’s inputs, that that was ALL she did in the past seasons with steve and jonathan, and ultimately she just wants a ‘yes partner’

and honestly it’s kind of beyond me?? how someone can so drastically misinterpret a character and their relationships? how is one just so wrong?

obviously, they brought up ronance’s first meeting, and of course, the age old “she was so mean”, when. no she wasn’t. she was absolutely impatient, and even snappy, she didn’t have much patience for robin’s rambling, but there was never a point where she insulted her or demeaned her. matter of fact? that’s what ROBIN was doing.

of course she didn’t mean to! robin was just questioning her reasoning and rambling to someone who was exhausted, wanted to go alone in the first place, and has been consistently ignored and questioned for her reasoning the entire show.

can you see why, maybe, nancy wasn’t the most receptive to robin’s attempts at honest conversation? or attempts to clear the air? cause nancy genuinely doesn’t have any problems with robin beyond the fact that she’s distracting her from doing what she does best, and that she chose to come along only to call all of her ideas ‘a massive shot in the dark’

and you know, i’d FULLY get it if after this, nancy DIDN’T see the value that robin’s input had and just ignored her and didn’t listen to her, like you’re implying…, but then,… she actively chooses robin to break into a psychiatric ward with her…..? makes her a disguise and everything…??

now, considering robin’s very real tendency to ramble about things that are kinda personal, it makes sense that nancy is like “let me do the talking” and idk, if when robin started talking one of the first things she said to the person they’re trying to convince they’re academic scholars is “my BOOBS hurt” i would also! probably! be a little freaked!

and you know what? cause robin’s idea works…. nancy trusts robin more! learns more about her and her strengths! they high five afterwards did you miss that!!!!!

to the overall claim though that she wants a ‘yes partner’…. idk this is just so weird and tbh, so misogynistic😭 this ENTIRE show nancy has been doubted and questioned and ignored, half of the time she’s slowed down by people that are supposed to care about her because they just assume she’s boy crazy or she’s cheating or they just think she’s wrong!

and idk, it would be weird if nancy didn’t hate that? if at the first sign of someone who admits she’s a genius and sees the value in her input, it softens her?

wanting someone who doesn’t doubt you constantly is not wanting a ‘yes partner’. matter of fact, nancy DOESNT want a yes partner. if robin was a yes partner, nancy wouldn’t have found out half of the shit that she did, because robin provided new insight and handled situations in HER way. robin didn’t blindly agree with everything nancy did, and it only drew nancy closer to her

anti-ronancers i will never understand u fr

[abysmalarts]

my personal analysis of mouthwashing

please for the love of god don't harass me over this. mouthwashing is a piece of wonderful fiction and what you enjoy in fiction doesn't reflect ones real life morals. 🙏 (yes im genuinely anxious over posting this, this fandom is so weird about jimmy as a character in a way i can't explain.)

so like. it was very different gameplay than i was expecting. the story line was very spastic and it bounced through the past and future very often. i really liked it. i cried when daisuke died and when curly got shoved in the overgrown fridge and jimmy killed himself. the game is a 10/10. howver im kinda mad because it's kinda obvious jimmy regrets some things he did and i feel like the fandom has boiled him down to "rapist fucking freak" when he obviously has some form of regretful feelings.

he regrets hurting curly and daisuke, i feel. he even mentions he doesnt wanna see daisuke's blood anymore when looking at the vent. i feel he does genuinely hate what he did to daisuke and curly (especially him) but at some point dug himself into a whole that he couldn't get out of and just killed everyone off out of fear. (he 1,000% was genuinely afraid of swansea btw.)

maybe i just didn't look into it enough but i didn't get the sentiment that he despised Anya (for sure had a prejudice against her because of her failing med school and being the tulpars nurse ("pony express is always cutting corners"). also, i don't think jimmy feels that guilty for raping her, but for sure was afraid of the consequences of his actions; serving time and the baby.) and the crew from the start other than jealousy on his part because of the attention curly was getting because he looked up to curly.

i feel like he was 1,000% egotistical and refused to take responsibility, which was what the entire game was about, but it's a very interesting way because he did, technically, take responsibility. he killed himself. he did take care of the issue, which was himself. he did save the captian, which he said he would. anya took care of herself and the baby.

he was also delusional the entire time and i feel like a lot of the visuals, excluding the scene where curly's on the table and jimmy cuts his leg, are metaphors just for horror. the table scene is 1,000% a hallucination to me and he 1,000% dragged those fuck ass bodies to that table lol.

i see jimmy very differently now and he's 500x more pathetic and i feel like i see him a lot differently than most of the fandom and i can't tell if that scares me or not cause if you don't have the same sentiment fandom-wide you're just told to die nowadays lmfao.

like jimmy was very obviously suffering. all of them were from the start.

also, ive seen NO ONE point this out, but im convinced swansea peer pressured daisuke into drinking with him because (ive heard, idk if its true) it is common for addicts to bring others 'down' (unsure what word to use) with them when they relapse.

i also understand more on why people ship jim and curly now as well. it's obvious jim loved his friend and he realized near the end how he fucked up everything and the reason he put curly in the cryo pod is because he wanted to save him. the end where curly is on fire says fucking enough to me man. he fell on his knees and sobbed.

he took responsibility in a way he saw fit and not only did he kill himself because he 1,000% was running away from a rape charge but i also do genuinely think he regretted everything from the start as soon as he tried to crash the ship.

people are bad, but just because someone's bad doesn't mean they can't regret their actions.

when i first saw this game i was obsessed with jimmy as a character because i genuinely thought he was just this disgusting sweaty peice of shit...which he very much is...but i just.

i see him just not as aggressive as the community makes him out to be? like he's snappy at the very best because the fucker is STRESSED and he even bitched to curly on the table that he underestimated the captians role.

i don't know. this game has changed my life. good lord.

[calicodreamer]

Calico Reviews: Sun and Moon Show eps. 1-3

Welcome back to Calico rants about the Sun and Moon show to her tumblr page, because its to cringe to explain to people in real life.

We’re going to try to do at least three episodes a week, and then write down my notes so I can ramble about this to my Tumblr, become like, an actual content creator for the things that I like.

Does it count as spoilers for the show if its episodes 1-3? regardless, spoilers below

9:21 Montgomery Gator is the WORST Daycare ATTENDANT in VRCHAT

They have a Funny little intro right now! It's Cringe, and I would like them to not.

 I am looking forward to when they don’t. .

I had previously watched this episode during my trying to get all those juicy little lore bits by being picky and choosey with what I wanted to consume, and unluckily for me, there isn't a complete season one compilation for me to pick through

Moon, when we the audience are not looking through his perspective, hangs out in Vtuber form in the corner. We don’t see any of Sun's Vtuber model right now, but he does have one, so there's that.

Sun - upon the start of the video, is cleaning the day-care, Moon comes down to check on him. Sun is an upbeat happy guy, who is anxiously cleaning the day-care - this seems to be his only personality trait. Moon is snappy, uptight, and grumpy but overall quiet outside of when he is yelling, or being angry at Sun.

Sun has hired Monty the gator (Yes he’s here, no I don’t know why), for 1000$ dollars a second to look after the daycare for him for whatever reason. Why would they have this much money to afford to give it to Monty the gator?? Don’t ask me, they just do I guess. Moon hates Monty the Gator - this is a reasonable opinion of Monty the gator.

Moon has control of the bank account they have I guess.

Sun has to talk to Roxanne for whatever reason (Yes, Yes I do mean Roxanne wolf, No I don’t know why she’s here)

Monty sucks at his job - hence the title of the video. Monty is also an idiot, and happy music plays when he comes on screen, he also briefly thinks that Sun is a statue- this feels like Flanderization, even though this is an au, I hate that character choice, I wish they would not. 

Sun seems to be slightly intense about cleaning, he has a whole organization schedule. Moon can only be grumpy, I assume this is because Sun didn’t talk to him about anything he was doing that day, but eeeeeeeeeeeeeh - Moon stop being a dick to your brother.

There’s implied to be kids running around while everything happens, which is also concerning.

Monty leaves because Moon hates him for whatever reason, I dunno why. He was sent to get snacks and then doesn’t show up for the rest of the episode. I’m also glad Monty is gone, Fuck I hate this character.

Sun shows up, upset that Monty has messed everything up, Moon is largely apathetic to the whole situation. 

9:06 Sun and Moon MOVE to SPACE in VRCHAT

We are still intro-ing, I would still like us to not be. I have to forcibly remind myself that this channel is meant for kids every time the intro comes on, and that If I watch like five episodes a day I can get through this in 2 months.

I am not going to watch five episodes a day

They (The people) told me to watch this episode, You really don’t have to. Nothing of major importance here, but there is funny nonsense happening. 

Moon is starting a ponzi scheme I guess, or atleast is implied to have business deals with “Someone” or people? Idk between this and insisting how “Animatronic” they are I’m beginning to loose it.

Monty the gator is also here (For SOME reason), and he has a space station apartment building that he is using to actively kill people to get more money, they only reason Moon cares about it is because Sun spent 50,000,000 dollars on an apartment for Moon to live in, because he thinks Moon hates him (Poor baby), and wanted Moon to be able to have his own space.

Moon has to walk Sun through what sarcasm is a couple times. Sun you sweet precious baby. And remind him that No he doesn’t actually hate him, and would prefer to live with Sun

Moon goes to Monty to get the Money back

Monty doesn’t wanna give the money back

Moon threatens to expose him

Monty gives the money back.

Apparently Sun spent even more money on a tv sold to him by Monty

Oh boy howdy, I hope this character trait of Sun being gullible isn’t around long.

Other notes:

It's Directly stated that they have a bank account, and that Moon has enough money to buy himself a house for whatever reason? Why is he buying himself a house? I don’t know. Where did they get the bank account from? I don’t know. WHY DO THEY HAVE-

There's also apparently enough money on this account to afford a funky little space station apartment, and a house.

Moon invent things, why? Idk personality traits.

But they do have a good dynamic going or whatever, and the voice acting for Moon is pretty good

17:51 Sun and Moon Play AMONG US in VRCHAT

THERE IS NO INTRO LETS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Sun and Moon are playing among us, for some reason. With Some of the Funtime animatronics, Glamrock Chica, and Freddy - just regular old Freddy - he is here

Sun and Moon are canonically, Very Big boys, and have to crawl around the ship

This is just a Funny little episode, Nothing important lore wise happens here, but you do get more of Sun and Moons Dynamic. 

Sun walks around being anxious the entire time, and everything is too short for him to move around properly. Which is a shame that no ones drawn this scene yet because I think that would be hilarious - them just knuckle walking on the ground because they’re both too tall. 

“OMG YOU GUYS ARE CREEPILY WALKING EVERYWHERE!?!?”

“Bro, I am literally just trying to get around.”

Funtime Freddy has a stupid voice

also Funtime foxy what the fuck is up with your voice, I am literally begging you both not to show up again so I don’t have to hear you. I hate it.

Moon is so proud of himself for just doing anything - he could burn coffee and I'd still believe he was proud of himself

Moon has such a smug little voice and I’m 80% sure its all the deadpan tone he has when he’s not yelling. When he’s not being an edgy bastard he’s such a little goober. The dynamic between the two is very interesting, and I am HERE for it. 

Notable: Moon is Willing to Kill Sun, and kill for Sun without a second thought, Sun is willing to lie for his brother. Even to his own detriment. Sun is afraid of Moon to some degree in the episode? I'm not sure how much of a joke this is.

I am most certainly reading into it

Moon stop being an edgy goober for like, five seconds, I swear. The deadpan voice even makes him even better. I love him

Sun stop being Anxious challenge “level impossible”

This episode is just silly little filler, Not much of note happens.

Everyone is rabid, except for Sun who is a very good boy. I cannot wait to see him change that

Final thoughts:

So Overall, In the first three episodes. My favourite character is definitely Moon, mostly because I like his voice better. Sun and Moon definitely have some issues in their relationship, especially since Moon is grumpy, and Sun is constantly going out of his way to try and appease him most of the time.

Anyhow, hopefully this makes my watching of the series easier.

Previous post?:

[lorynna]

white woman tears anon from earlier - that's actually fair & i agree with what you said about "white women don't need ass kissing," i think its come to a point where any "defense" of white women (i'm white let me clarify) i feel like i need to clarify that i do not think white privilege *doesn't* exist, i guess that in itself shows the problem. it will already be assumed that whatever i say is white women tears so i need to give a disclaimer that i am not victimizing myself for being a white woman. it makes me feel whiny before even speaking, having an opinion or thoughts is "whining and crying". the self flagellation isn't necessary but i feel obligated to say so otherwise be assumed racist/"karen." i've seen arguments of "don't speak then/we don't need your opinion then" which just turns into an echo chamber and you can't have an actual conversation about anything without it getting shut down immediately. and have women not been told to shut up since literally forever? idk, not the best at describing this because it feels taboo to discuss but hopefully this makes some sense. i'm also not fully versed in the Imane/Angela situation but the hate i've been seeing online is insane, seeing men say "im glad that white girl got hit" like 🫤 is this not just misogyny? men (and many women disappointingly) don't give a shit about women's sports they want to see her get hit because she cried. she cried "white women tears" and she should be hurt for that. this is not giving other women a sour taste in their mouth??

Hello again anon - I'm glad you didn't take my reply negatively - I was worried you might have!

And yes, I totally relate to what you mean about feeling the need to clearly state that you do believe in white privilege before defending any white woman - I did so aswell in my reply to you previously.

Maybe this is more of an online-forum-problem, than when you're talking to someone directly irl. I often find it tiring to have discussions on here because there are so many people not even trying to have a good faith conversation but more so aiming to knock of their daily-life frustrations by twisting or laying words in your mouth you haven't said, just to make it seem like a cheap win when all they did was jump to thoughtless assumptions. - so logically you try to minimize every potential possibility for them to accuse you of anything by thoroughly elaborating on all of your beliefs beforehand.

I myself notice how I care less and less about arguing with people online. If it's a healthy conversation where I feel like I am being respected and I can learn smth from it - then sure but I won't waste my time on engaging in a debate where the whole point is to insult each other and where both are not ready to start with good faith.

In the end it doesn't benefit me and prioritizing one's mental health always goes first. So instead of trying to change people's minds (like i tried when I was younger and more patient and naive) I no longer see any shame in just deleting a person's comment from my blog if they have no constructive criticism but only insults etc. This is my space and if someone violates my boundaries I delete it and be done with it, even though sometimes the desire of sending a snappy reply overtakes.

Don't worry - I get what you're saying.

And thanks for writing again ❤️

[larcenywrites]

Talk more about the whole Tony Stark and the couch/guest bedroom thing? Like when and how does he decide that he's gonna sleep there, and is it just for a day or like how long does it last? Would you ever send him to sleep on the couch? (if yes, under what circumstances, like, why would you send him to the couch? And for how long?) And how does he feel about getting kicked out, how does he react, how does he try to be accepted back into the bedroom?

Idk I kinda got carried away-

I’m sure it doesn’t happen very often aside from the fact that Tony does occasionally fall asleep on the couch, bathtub, office chair, snd of course in the lab (and maybe even on a table in the lab), whether it’s because he’s kept working through his exhaustion or because he’s sick or sometimes because he’s been drinking too much. I’m sure he’s even fallen asleep in a chaise lounge by the pool some nights! Probably even in or on a floaty in the pool!

But moving on, there’s some occasions where it’s not an accident :( or an innocent decision where he was just in the lab and he was too tired to even go upstairs, or on the nights he felt a bit insecure about that arc reactor and felt bad that it was so bright. Now, Tony is… a lot of things. A lot of difficult things… one of those things being that he’s difficult! He can be pissy, stubborn, snappy, sarcastic, passive-aggressive, and snarky, which means that when fights do happen, they can probably get out of control rather quickly when he’s feeling defensive and attacked, and that’s the only way he knows how to respond. It’s not entirely his fault, but he should also probably learn to grow out of it too, and that’s not anyone else’s fault. He’s definitely not as bad the older he gets, but pre iron man between becoming CEO and Afghanistan will probably be the hardest time to be in a relationship with him, and early stages of post iron man will also be difficult when you include his lack of self-preservation and erratic and dangerous new behavior. Oh, and he’s always right.

Pre-Iron Man, an argument could really be around anything and he might start acting out, especially when he’s so young and fiery and confused and depressed and a whole list of problems. He doesn’t like feeling controlled, so stop confronting him about the drinking and asking him to stop. He doesn’t like feeling like he’s in the wrong, so stop probing about the weapons program and making him think about what and who they’re being used on. He gets testy and flighty, and while you may think he’s just mad snd doesn’t want to see you when he doesn’t come to bed or find him getting blankets on the couch or settling in a nearby guest room, he just doesn’t want to confront you. Because you’re probably right, first of all, whatever it was about, and seeing you kinda makes him face whatever demons the conversation brought up :/ and he’s scared you’ll bring it up again :/ so, even tho it honestly sucks and maybe he’s a little scared of the dark because he’s never actually been in this room properly before now, he’s going to be dramatic and sleep in another room. Well, probably not much sleep. And he also doesn’t wanna face you because he does feel guilty, believe it or not. He’s sparing you from having to look at him! He’s giving you your own space and leave and quiet! At least, he tells himself that to feel like he’s doing something right, and something right by you. It typically won’t last for more than that night, and maybe two if he unintentionally falls asleep elsewhere, but while he may apologize, he’ll probably never say that you were right. Once he comes back from work the next day, probably really late if he can get away with it tbh (and otherwise he’s just super quiet and keeps to himself where he can) he’ll stalk his way into the bedroom and carefully climb back into bed. He does hate it when you’re mad at him, and may just try to act like nothing has happened and try to cuddle 🙄 And while that’s pretty toxic of him, sometimes it’s easier to go along with it and move on until next time :/ though, he might still say he’s sorry, at least? If you do bring it up again, try to do so pretty quietly and gently. He’ll still probably just say he’s sorry and try to move on, even though that’s not entirely the point. Now, if it’s a situation where the argument ended in him being pretty mean, and you definitely tell him that you don’t even wanna look at him and to fuck off somewhere else, he’ll definitely realize his mistake right then and there and try to fix it. Probably to no avail, however. Because when he gets mean he can definitely push it too far. Talking about how you’re being nosy, controlling, finding a problem in nothing. Oh, you’re concerned about the weapons program? You sure don’t have an issue with spending the money it brings in. And ya know, he can’t really blame you for kicking him out. He’ll stutter your name and struggle to find anything to say but maybe he’s just stalling time. He’ll still feel shitty when he’s lying wherever he’s gone alone, but the difference is that now he’s kinda holding a grudge because you kicked him out! But he probably won’t last the night :( he’s restless and anxious and guilty (as he should be!) and he’s really gotta get it off his chest (as if he’s the victim too!). He’ll trudge in rather loudly and stand over you and say your name until you wake up, and that probably has you even grumpier now… but he will apologize and even admit you were right. He gets carried away, and his aggressive defensiveness isn’t exactly his fault, but that also doesn’t exactly excuse it either. He does try to do more of the things he probably used to do more often, like bouquets with promises of love written on them or spending more time upstairs. And he really wouldn’t blame you if you needed a break from him at this point, and maybe it would even be a good idea, but he’s really not sure if he could take it right now :( of course. He’s not always like this! In fact, it is probably not that often! But maybe that’s what makes it so much worse when it does happen.

Though, when he’s older and closer to that momentous trip overseas, still just a businessman, he’s definitely not going to be as bad. But just as he seems to be getting better, of course now there’s whole new problems. Those early stages of being a superhero will bring plenty of strife, and bring back plenty of that stress-induced defensiveness that’s meant to be his protective barrier for a few minutes that causes more harm than good. He’s being reckless! He’s being obsessive! Isn’t this a little crazy? It’s stressing you out more than anything, and he’s not really paying any mind or to his health, his property, his life, you! And he never has a proper answer, just more excuses and combative words. He’ll just stay down here in the lab for your sake. He’ll keep working on it and prove it’s fine! It’s going to help everyone! You, him, the world! Wasn’t that what he was supposed to do? He even shut down the weapons program! Wasn’t that what you wanted? Again, he’s confused and frustrated, and now he hurts everywhere— can’t you cut him some slack?! Everyone’s a victim here tbh, so it’ll probably end with you both apologizing. You may not understand fully yet as to why, but obviously this whole thing means a lot to him, but also he means a lot to you! He probably been avoiding you down in this lab for days, and now he’s just tired :( just take him to bed. Tony’s been through way too much by now, and you’ve both been through a lot together, so there’s probably not going to be many more escalating fights after this, and definitely no kicking him out. It would really take a toll of him, and now there’s no telling what he’ll do out there with an unclear head and those feelings he hates so much. Besides, there are definitely better ways to handle these things, especially when the problem is not longer his pettiness. If anything you’ll be begging him to come to bed! Which may still result in an argument, but something will sort of suddenly changed? It’s not like it used to be. In fact, it’s probably almost a little sad. It’s still the same bouquets with love notes and warm baths, but it’s… different. And unfortunately, it may have taken a near-death experience to get him to finally mellow out.

But from here and on, he definitely learns to be more communicative. If something is wrong, it finally gets talked about. It’s still not very easy for him to find words, nor is it easy for him to admit he’s wrong, but he’ll do it! He’s worked on a lot of things by now, and has more symbolically moved on from things, such as finally removing the arc reactor. He definitely doesn’t purposely hide anymore! And he’s learned to control his temper and bite his tongue— with you, at least 😅

[cyndrastic]

i’m making a new au

idk if anyone has actually seen Penn Zero: Part-Time Hero, but it aired on Disney XD in the early/mid 2010s and was one of my all time favorite cartoons.

If you’ve never heard of it, there’s a synopsis linked here

if you wanna watch it for yourself, here’s the first episode (this link definitely doesn’t also lead to a trusted website where you can watch the entire show for free along with a ton of other cartoons, movies, and anime’s and definitely isn’t how i watch South Park without having Paramount + 👀)

if you don’t feel like either of those here’s a link to an out of context video that i think will be easy to understand without having watched the show and that shows character dynamics well.

anyway here’s the characters:

i’m gonna add a cut here so if you don’t feel like reading/watching something to get a feel for these characters, i’ll explain them (also it’s kind of an excuse for me to rant about how this show takes traits from common media and twists them perfectly to still have identifiable character types while having the characters be unique and mix well together in the show)

Kyle will obviously be Penn Zero himself, part-time hero, who’s the main character. I mean, come on, even the main guy has curly read hair! It fits too well. Penn also has some established anger issues, and sometimes has a hard time putting his personal emotions and morals aside for the sake of a mission. He’s snappy, witty, and good hearted but sometimes he can lose sight of the right thing when he gets in his own head.

Stan and Wendy will be Boon and Sashi, Penn’s best friends.

Stan is Boon, part-time wiseman. He’s a stereotypical dumb best friend, but he’s pretty philosophically mature when he needs to be. This is actually the only show I can think of where the “dumb best friend” trope isn’t annoying as shit, cause normally I hate characters like this. But here, Boon never feels like a burden to the episode and him being a little slower never makes him less capable than his friends. No one ever complains about him being too stupid and his best friends never belittle/infantilize him for not being as smart. He’s a great moral booster for the team and it’s clear how much his friends enjoy his company care for him despite him being kinda dumb. I don’t understand how no show since this one has been able to get this trope right.

Wendy is Sashi, part-time sidekick. She’s a total badass, having more fighting and strategic skills than the boys. She’s also the one to keep the mission on target and is willing to do whatever it takes to win the day. However, she’s never the stereotypical “i’m the responsible one so i hate fun” or “i’m a girl who can fight so therefore that’s my only character trait.” Shes aloof, isn’t the best at social ques, highly competitive, and shows her love for her friends by being fiercely loyal and protective of them. Even though she can get annoyed and tired of the random antics her friends cause, she never talks down to them. She also takes her role of sidekick very seriously and even though she’s a much more skilled fighter than Penn, she listens to his instructions and never undermines what he says unless what he tells her to do will lead to them failing. She’s a fiery spirit and can and will kick your ass if she sees fit.

Cartman and Butters are Rippen and Larry, the Stendyle trio’s part time villains.

Cartman is Rippen, part-time villain. Rippen is a very stereotypically evil guy. He doesn’t really have a motive, he just wants to win. Does he ever? No. Is it his fault that he loses most of the time? Also no. He’s a genuinely good villain but it’s often the people he works with or some Deus Ex Machina for the heroes that keeps him from getting to victory. Despite being a good villain, hes also pretty aloof. He’s a hilarious character simply because of how annoyed he is with everything all the time (especially his henchman Larry/Butters). Despite this, he does genuinely care for some things, like his stuffed animals and his co-villain (though he’s hard pressed to admit it). In the show Rippen is an art teacher who hates everything, but in this au Cartman is just gonna be another student who loves to mess with Kyle.

Butters is Larry, part-time minion. He works under Cartman and honestly sucks balls at being a villain. He’s silly, doesn’t really know how to take a situation seriously, gullible, easily distracted, and very kindhearted. However, he is incredibly loyal to Cartman and will do whatever he says without hesistation, he’ll just usually do it wrong or twist it so it’s a nice thing to do. Most of the time Butters is just there to stand by Cartman and do his own thing. It’s also a running gag in the show that Larry will just ramble on and on about literally anything and it drives characters actually insane, and Rippen will sometimes use that as a weapon, which is a very Cartman thing to do. In the show Larry is principle of the school Stendyle attends, but like with Cartman, i’m just gonna make Butters another student. However, in the show, Larry is also rich as fuck, which is really funny so i’m keeping that. Like, it’s rarely brought up, but there are some episodes that take place in his mansion and it’s great. (“Cartman, you know what i’d do if i had a million dollars?” “Butters, you do have a million dolla-“ “I’d buy everyone in the world a portrait! I did that once in my neighborhood. my neighbor said ‘you shouldn’t have!’ and I said ‘no worries Mark it’s my pleasure happy birthday!’ and he said ‘it’s not my birthday and my name’s Tyler’…” <- actual character interaction from the show almost word for word, tell me that doesn’t sound Cartman and Butters coded)