#so i got AT BEST 6 hours and AT WORST 4 hours of sleep

[caelcstis]

my reading and comprehension skills are AWFUL today i guess holy shIT idk if it's a smart idea for me to make starters lMAO

[adambja]

✴️THE SUBCONSCIOUS MIND✴️

The Guide - the only post you will ever need to understand how your subconscious mind works!

1. Time isn't real

Let me break it to you! Time isn't real at all cuz think about it all these hours and numbers are made by humans!

But how?!

They just track how the earth moves around the sun and that's all

Yes without time there will be morning and night and still these hours aren't real

As in whole THE UNIVERSE!! TIME DOESN'T EXIST IF YOU AREN'T ON THE EARTH!

which GETS US TO THAT ONE POINT

SUBCONSCIOUS MIND REPROGRAMMING DOESN'T TAKE 21 DAYS OR ANY TIME

Subconscious mind reprogramming is instant

That's why I always add it to my tapes as benefits and that's why I made the benefits! cuz it bypasses the conscious mind and it makes it easier for your subconscious to make it reality!

So basically it all comes down to what you assume!!

2. Languages

I got that question a lot about what if I can't speak English, will the affirmations work?

Yes ofc they will

whatever it's affirmations only or my tapes

Even if you make your own tapes it will work!!

3. Thoughts

Is it really "it is what it is"?

Yes, it is what it is

For ex.

if you think you already got 50k US DOLLARS you already have it it's that simple (like that success story a girl experienced with one of my free tapes she manifested 50k US DOLLARS! - also this one success story - The tape is on YouTube btw)

Again it all comes down to what you assume!

4. Assuming

Assuming hmmm... Do you know that all your thoughts are assumptions?

But there are two things about these thoughts!

Did you assume that they are real and true?

Do you assume that whatever you want is already achieved?

Do you assume that you are always right?

Or did you assume that it can't happen cuz you think you are lying!

Just be honest with yourself

Get a piece of paper and write everything you think about down ABOUT A SPECIFIC MANIFESTATION YOU GOT ON YOUR MIND!

And if you think you are lying why? Ask yourself! Make all that noise go away and clear it for yourself! You deserve better

Now this gets us to another point which is your manifesting self-concept and your self-concept they are very important for ur existence like they are the core of your life! So a little advice work on them then do whatever you want!

Cuz it changes the way you think and what you assume

So like a person with a bad or mid self-concept they will always assume the worst for themselves

Another person with a good self-concept they will be aware of who they are and what they are capable of!

5. Thoughts, Feelings and beliefs!

Again and again

How you feel is created by thought

Subconscious programming → beliefs → feelings → thoughts

So if you keep saying "oh I am sad" multiple times you will be sad it's just that simple

Use it for your own good!

And imagine what... Right now

Your beliefs will reflect in your reality after one thought instantly after reading this post so be careful cuz i already manifested this while typing this!

And listen to in control tape by me on YouTube!

Basically you can always create beliefs instantly cuz you believe that time isn't real... Did you know what we are doing here? Just assuming the best for us but you still have to be constant to get used to it and make it a part of your programming like everyday

Someone like me I enter the void every time I nap and sleep I got used to it and I don't even feel tired anymore when I wake up there and I don't use it that much anymore!

I literally enjoy how easy it is in life to do whatever I want and experience whatever I want!

6. Simple assumptions to have a good relationship with your subconscious mind

I will give you 10 affirmations from my paid subconscious mind tape at the end (I know it won't be the same as the tape itself because of the benefits but still it might help you guys!)

Do you know that your subconscious mind is here for you like a parent it's like your personal assistant - it has everything about you, your memories and it controls ur whole life it accepts every single thought you think about unless you say it it's not something you accept so it gets in your subconscious mind like "oh I don't accept this"

Even the negative statements your subconscious mind knows it negative!! Same thing with the positive statements

Like for ex.

I am not a bad person - negative statement

Your subconscious mind acknowledges it!

Your subconscious mind won't take it in like "I am a bad person" without the "not"

Even the same thing with

I am a good person - positive statement

Your subconscious mind acknowledges it TOO

The subconscious mind ACCEPTS THE NEGATIVE STATEMENTS TOO!

IT IS simply WHAT IT IS!!

It's not the opposite at all as some weird bloggers said! Or even that book about the subconscious mind it's called "the power of the subconscious mind by Joseph Murphy" it's full of bs and limiting beliefs - I genuinely hate it

I literally saw a coach in Saudi Arabia on X (PREVIOUSLY Twitter) selling a whole course for almost 30k USD and sharing all the limiting beliefs in that book and that was months ago!

I mean at least IF YOU ARE MAKING PEOPLE PAY FOR SOMETHING PROVIDE THEM WITH THE BEST THINGS AND INFORMATION

I hated how some people let some crazy stuff like that get to them without doing their own research or just creating their own rules!!

Be a little independent please for your own good

Your subconscious mind can be programmed instantly YOU DON'T NEED ANY TIME all you need to realize and understand is that yes "I always reprogram my subconscious mind instantly" and YOU JUST NEED comfort and just repeating the affs - this is a way

Another way to do it - make your own tapes and it's just repetition

Another way to do it - simply be it be whatever you want to be! Like it's already you!

One last way to do it - my free tapes + paid tapes they are very effective they work from the first listen because they have benefits again what actually made my tapes get that much success stories is the benefits

I am gonna upload 2 new free tapes they are small but very effective! Everyone here will like them!!

🎀10 Affirmations for your subconscious mind🎀

from my paid subconscious mind tape

Affirmations:

Me and my subconscious mind are one.

My subconscious mind already accepts everything I say as true.

My subconscious mind already accepts everything think about as true.

My subconscious mind is already my best friend forever.

My subconscious mind always helps me with everything.

My subconscious mind always loves me.

My subconscious mind always helps me reach my highest potential in this lifetime!

My subconscious mind already believes what I want it to believe easily effortlessly quickly and instantly.

My subconscious mind always manifests everything I want easily effortlessly and instantly.

I have a perfect relationship with my subconscious mind.

Thank you guys for all the support and love and I hope this post helped you!

If you have any questions you can always send an ask I will be happy to answer them whenever I am free! Also you can dm me if you want a paid tape or a custom tape!

One last thing these tapes are with benefits they aren't like any other tapes that are available everywhere these days! 🎀

Enjoy!💗

[artiststarme]

The Gift of Not Dying Part 14

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13

It's been awhile but hopefully this will get me back in the groove of things. I hope you like it and please leave your thoughts in the comments!

~*~*~*~ Steve watched as the dazzling smile on Eddie’s face dropped to reveal absolute, unadulterated horror. He clearly wasn’t expecting his best friend/tomorrow’s date/future boyfriend to show up at fuck past two in the morning with a bruised face and blood covered sailor’s uniform. Steve could only imagine how he would respond if Eddie had shown up to Hopper's cabin looking like death the way Steve must right now.

“Oh my god, Steve?! What the fuck happened? Are you alright?” Eddie ushered him into the trailer and gently pushed him to a seat on the couch. 

Steve didn't know how to respond to him. On the one hand, he didn't want Eddie to worry. On the other hand, nothing would ever be alright again. Hop was dead, his body still stuck in the Russian base under Starcourt where he himself had died multiple times. Steve could feel the throbbing of his broken heart's beats pulsating in his face still. He definitely had a concussion if the double vision and underwater hearing were indicative of anything. Worst of all, it was all Steve's fault. This entire situation never would have happened had he not tempted the universe. He was too happy, he knew everything would fall into catastrophe eventually and he hadn't warned anyone.

So instead of answering his best friend, he pulled at Eddie's shoulders until the man got the message and wrapped him in a warm embrace that smelled of Honeybunches, motor oil, and marijuana. All of Steve's favorite smells that usually calmed him down. But not this time.

He sobbed into Eddie's chest, tears and blood mixing together on his face and soaking into the thin black fabric of Eddie's shirt. Steve just couldn't stop. He cried for the pain he'd gone through in the Russian base and the incessant battery he'd endured at the hands of sadists. He cried for the loss of Robin's normal life and the fact that she would probably hate him now since he'd dragged her into the absolute shit-show that was his life. Most of all though, he cried for Hopper. He cried for his dad that adopted him into his little family and gave him a little sister, the dad that dropped everything to help Steve whenever he needed it.

Poor Eddie just hugged him through it all. He didn't know why Steve had woken him up from a dead sleep at an ungodly hour in the morning only to unveil a face more recognizable as ground beef. He didn't know who had beaten him up or why Hopper wasn't behind him in his truck ready to drag him back to the overprotected cabin in the woods. He didn't need to understand because his best friend was in need of help and a good hug which Eddie could provide.

After what felt like hours of crying, Steve rasped, “Eds, Hop is gone. He died tonight.”

Eddie’s hands stopped their soothing circles on his back and he pulled back to look him in the eyes. There was no joking there, just complete and utter dread and hopelessness in the eye that wasn't swollen shut.

“Chief Hopper died tonight? Are you okay, where are you going to go?” He backtracked for a moment and pulled Steve’s battered body to his gently once more. “I’m sorry for your loss, man. I know the Chief was like a father to you. What’s going to happen now?”

Steve wanted to cry, to scream at the world for being so unfair as to take one of the only people that had ever cared for him. But his eyes were dry and his heart was bone tired after such an arduous night. So instead of sobbing some more or breaking down, Steve shrugged. “I’m going to have to go back to my parent’s house. I can’t stay in Hop’s cabin without him there. And El is going to live with Mrs. Byers. I don’t have anywhere else to go.”

Eddie shook his head and placed a weary hand on Steve's face. He wanted to give him comfort but with all the blood and bruises on his face, he didn't know where to touch without causing more pain. “You can stay here. Wayne won’t mind as long as we don’t mess with his mug or cap collections. He’s got a habit for taking in strays. Hell, just look at me. You’ll always have a place here.”

Steve couldn’t move in though. Everywhere he went, misfortune followed. He was like a plague, sucking the life out of everything he touched. It started with his parents and he sucked the joy right out of their lives leaving nothing but bitterness and sorrow, certainly not enough love for the disappointment he became. It broke Nancy by killing her best friend and tainting their relationship. Steve should’ve kept his distance from Hop and El but his selfishness won out in the end. And now Hopper was gone. Steve’s plague had struck once again and had stolen his happiness with it. He couldn’t do that to Eddie and Wayne, they’d been through far too much already. They didn’t deserve to deal with him on top of it all. 

“Thanks but I don’t want you guys to get sick of me. I’ll just stay at my parent’s house and crash here when they come home. If that’s okay with you and Wayne.”

Eddie shook his head before entwining his fingers with Steve’s. “Of course it is. We’ll worry about that tomorrow. For now, let’s deal with your face. Did you go to the hospital? I can literally see the bruises swelling in front of my eyes. There’s no way you don’t have a concussion right now, why would they let you drive like this?”

“They didn’t, I walked,” Steve corrected distractedly. His mind was reeling over grief and pain, too distracted to abide by the story he was supposed to use. 

“Walked from where?”

“Starcourt,” his mouth just kept talking despite his eyes seeing the alarm on Eddie’s face. “The Russians stole my car keys so I couldn’t drive. It’s fine though, I have an extra set in the kitchen of my parent’s house. It was only four miles or so, not too bad in the grand scheme of things. I’ve had worse.”

Eddie just looked at him blankly, too indecisive to decide on concern, horror, or anger at whoever had done this to his friend. He was pretty positive he loved this weirdo, who the fuck had the audacity to keep beating him to a pulp? Couldn't these monsters see how lovable he was?!

“Um, I don’t know how to respond to that. I’m getting my keys and we’re going to the hospital. I don’t need to know what happened, especially since I’m pretty positive that you’re concussed and not making sense. I just need to know you’re okay so we’re going to the ER. Let me just call Wayne and we can go.” Eddie motioned with both hands for Steve to stay still and he did. Even when he heard crashing in Eddie’s room while he looked for his keys and panicked whispers when he finally reached Wayne on the phone, Steve remained in his seat on the old couch.  

He knew he didn’t have to go to the hospital, the worst that could happen already had, but he couldn’t reveal that to Eddie. So, he’d bite his tongue and go through the motions. That was his specialty after all. For now, he’d let Eddie take care of him. He would ignore the grief that blackened his soul and the pain that accompanied the thought of his found family breaking apart. He'd deal with the trauma of loss and pain and death sometime later when he could handle a breakdown alone. At this very moment, Steve would hold himself together and lie to his friend and the doctors he was forced to see to keep the Party's secret. He had already dragged Robin into this mess and had probably lost her in the process, he didn't think he could survive losing Eddie too.

Tag list: @doubleb11 @nburkhardt @counting-dollars-counting-stars @newtstabber @estrellami-1 @thegoblinboy @manda-panda-monium @i-less-than-three-you @joruni @swimmingbirdrunningrock @mentalcyborg @vampireinthesun @spectrum-spectre @goodolefashionedloverboi @grtwdsmwhr @nam-draws @anaibis @zerokrox-blog @renaissan-vvitch @a-huge-nerdy-nerd @labels-are-for-the-weak @amoris-no-smut-allowed @5ammi90 @precursorandthedragon @i-must-potato @valinwonderland @lololol-1234 @wonderland-girl143-blog @tailsfromthecrypt @trippypancakes @ghosttotheparty @thing-a-ling @bleach-the-kitten @pyrohonk @carlyv @gregre369 @lololol-1234

@conversesweetheart @suddenlyinlove @yikes-a-bee @perseus-notjackson @merricatty @maya-custodios-dionach @lumoschild @lawrencebshoggoth @devondespresso @y0urnewstepp4r3nt @nohomoyesbi @theseaofdespair @justdrugsformethanks @space-invading-pigeon @audz-aus @mintmont

[m1lflov3rrr]

Hi hiiiiii! Firstly, lemme just say I absolutely ADORE your fics on wattpad and im SO thrilled you're also here on tumblr now??!?!? An absolute treat, this is <3

Anyways as for requests— can I request Larissa and/or Marilyn dealing with Y/N who's got a really bad sleeping schedule thanks to having the WORST case of insomnia? (fluff most appreciated, but IF you want somth more spicy to deal it, I wouldn't say no to it hehe 💕 :3c)

Thank you sm <3

Thank you for the request and so sorry it took literally MONTHS!!! But here it is now!! And thank you for your kind words, means so much to me <3 I really hope you enjoy this, I made a few changes to it. I don’t have that much experience with insomnia, but with sleep deprivation so I wrote about that, I hope it is okay!

No Rest for the Wicked

Pairing: Larissa Weems x fem!reader

Warnings: sleep deprivation, health issues, fainting, worrying, fluff

Word count: 2.5k

Summary: Larissa tries to help you when she notices how little you’re sleeping…

You sighed deeply as you raised your gaze from your laptop and looked out the window. A heavy fog had descended on the school grounds, reaching as far as the tired eye could see. 

The fog was persistent, it was thick. 

You felt like your thoughts were similarly clouded. You smiled at the irony. 

Returning your gaze back to your work, you looked at the time, it was way past 4 am already. Larissa would wake up soon. 

For the past few weeks it had been like this. You were staying up late, only getting a few hours of sleep a night. And sometimes, like tonight, no sleep at all. 

You felt that you didn’t have enough time. The work load you had felt like the weight of the world rested on your shoulders. You had stacks of ungraded papers, lesson plans to finalize, and a curriculum to update. 

You were exhausted. 

You tried your best to hide it, you didn’t want Larissa to get worried. Because her concern would’ve broken your heart. 

Every day went like this: You ’got up’ at 6, prepared for your lessons of the day and started at 8, taught for 8 hours straight, got back to your shared quarters and spent the rest of the night with Larissa. And after she had fallen asleep, you’d finish your work and prepare for the next day. 

You didn’t have the heart to tell your wife how much workload you’d had recently and how overwhelming it was for you. You had had difficulties in the past finding time to spend together, and after months of you both trying to work it out, it was, indeed, working. 

But lately, it had become too much. With the work, of course. You knew that Larissa would get concerned and start panicking and rushing things to make it better. You didn’t want that. She had her own job to do, which definitely had a workload twice as big as yours was. You felt pathetic. Your wife does three times the work you do in a day and you’re still stressed? Yes, pathetic. 

You finished your lesson plans for the day, just to save yourself some time later. 

It was 5:13 am when you were done. You rubbed your temples to ease your already growing headache as you got up from the desk, swayed there for a bit before making your way to the bathroom. 

You winced at your reflection in the mirror. Your dark and puffy undereyes were still there, if not even more bad and noticeable. This was the first time in your 25 years of living that you had had eye bags. You knew it was bad. 

You hopped in the shower to keep yourself up and maybe gather some energy to get through the day. At first the cold water did wake you up a bit more. Then, when you turned it a little bit warmer, you realized how bad of an idea it was. The warm water relaxed all those tense muscles in your body and you closed your eyes to enjoy the feeling. 

And your eyes stayed closed for a bit too long. If you weren’t so tired, you would have laughed at yourself. The image of you half asleep, standing in your shower. What in the actual fuck, really? 

But something made you jump and push your body’s cries for help and sleep to the back of your mind. 

”Darling?” You heard Larissa’s hoarse morning voice call out to you from the door. 

”Mhm?” You hummed as you turned the water back to cold to not almost fall asleep again. 

”Nothing, just wondering how you’re up so early every morning this week, usually it’s a task itself to get you up,” She chuckled at her own words. 

You smiled to yourself and turned the faucet off, stepping out of the shower so you could see her. 

You noticed how she was checking you out, biting her lip as her eyes roamed across your body. You smirked at her as you took your towel and dried yourself, about to wrap it around your bare body. 

She quickly snapped out of her trance and stepped forward, taking the towel in her hands and unwrapping it, causing it to drop on the floor. 

”I don’t think we’ll be needing that.” She said in a low tone as she pulled you flush against her body by your waist, attacking your neck with her mouth. 

You hummed in delight and closed your eyes in satisfaction at the sudden move, wrapping your hands around her neck. 

You let out little gasps, you couldn’t even let out a simple moan because of your sleep-deprived state. 

And it felt so good, feeling your wife’s lips on your neck, still keeping your eyes shut, leaning into her, maybe leaning too much, starting to drift off, losing your balance… 

Your eyes snapped open when your heard Larissa’s sudden, loud gasp, as she had her arms tightly wrapped around your torso to keep you from falling to the hard floor. 

”Darling, what on earth just happened here?!” She asked in shock as you stood up. 

You took a moment to process what she just said, just because you couldn’t think as fast as usual. 

”What? M’sorry, just got a little.. distracted there, I think..” You responded hazily, trying to focus your eyes to look into hers. 

She ducked her head a bit, trying to get a closer look of you and inspecting your condition. ”Are you alright? You had me worried there, are you sure you want to go to work today? You can take the day off, okay?” 

Your eyes widened in panic, ”No, no, Rissa I am absolutely fine, and I will not be taking the day off. You shouldn’t be concerned, I am okay.” You said hurriedly and walked away, leaving your wife standing in the bathroom, extremely confused and concerned. 

-

”Okay, I think it’s time we all head for lunch, see you guys tomorrow!” You announced the class with a smile, packing your things and leaving for the dining hall. As you entered the hall, you seached for your wife with your eyes, as you always ate lunch together. She wasn’t there. 

You yelped loudly when you felt someone grab your shoulder from behind, causing some people nearby to look at your weirdly. You turned around, ”God, you scared me, Rissa,” You breathed out. 

She just responded with a laugh, sliding her arm to the small of your back and guiding you to walk together to get the food. 

As you sat down, you began eating in silence. You opened a can of energy drink, something that you’d been drinking a lot these days. You didn’t usually even drink those that often, but you needed something to keep you up and awake. 

Larissa sent you a scolding look, a frown tugging at her lips. ”Y/N, what’s this?” 

You widened your eyes, you didn’t want her to find out like this. Or any other way. ”Oh, that’s just an energy drink. Thought it might give me a little boost.” 

She narrowed her eyes slightly, ”A boost? Y/N, darling, this isn’t healthy. Are you not sleeping enough?” 

You smiled, but it was forced. ”Rissa, I’m fine. It’s just been a busy week.” 

She sighed, looking at you with worry-filled eyes. ”Y/N, I can see something is going on, don’t shut me out. Whatever it is, I’m here to help you. We’re a team, remember?” 

Your gaze softened, you were really lucky to have her. But you didn’t want her to know. You didn’t want her you worry about you, because when Larissa got worried, it was all she could think about. She couldn’t work, rest, do anything. She’d have to get to the bottom of it. 

You pursed your lips and took her hand in yours, ”I know, and I appreciate that. But I’ve got this, Rissa. Trust me.” 

-

It had been a few days since that, and your condition and fatigue were only growing worse. Your work load seemed to have doubled since that day. You were trying (and struggling) to stay awake with the constant consumption of caffeine. 

The fog was growing thicker and thicker. You barely could see where you were walking. 

Larissa had had enough. She had been watching your extremely concerning situation unfold in the past few days into something much more worrying. She couldn’t bear seeing you suffer like this for a moment longer. This had to end now. 

You were sitting in your classroom, head buried in your hands as you tried to take a deep breath so that the pounding headache you had recently gotten would go away. You’d taken more aspirin than you probably should have, but it didn’t do anything. You were feeling miserable, physically, and that way, emotionally, too. 

Your eyes began to feel heavier and heavier, and you almost didn’t hear the sharp knock on your classroom door. You flinched harshly at that, squeaking a quiet, ”It’s open.” 

You heard the door opening and the familiar clacking of heels filled the room. 

”Darling?” 

Her voice was soft, almost a little wary. 

You raised your gaze to meet hers, ”Yes?” 

Her eyes were filled with concern, barely hidden. ”I’m worried about you. I can see that something’s going on, and if you’d just please, please let me in, I could help you. Okay?” 

You pursed your lips. You knew this was coming. ”Larissa there is absolutely no reason for you to worry. I am fine, okay?” Your voice was a mixture of frustration and exhaustion. 

”No, you’re not.” She snarled, her tone of voice contrasting the one she had just moments prior. ”You’ve been running on fumes for days! Darling, this… this can’t go on any longer.” Her voice broke as her eyes held a silent plea. 

Your jaw clenched, eyes fixed on the floor. ”I can handle it.” Your voice was barely above a whisper, and it was becoming harder and harder to keep convincing yourself that. 

”Y/N you almost collapsed earlier! This can’t go on.” She stepped closer, reaching her hand out to touch your shoulder. 

You shrugged off her touch, ”It was nothing. Just a moment of dizziness.” 

Larissa scoffed, her patience was wearing thin. ”And what happens when it’s not just a moment? What happens when you can’t get back up?” 

Something in that comment did it. Your eyes flashed with fury as your tone of voice turned into one laced with venom.  ”You just don’t get it, Larissa! I can fucking handle myself!” 

Her brows furrowed and you could’ve sworn you almost saw her flinch a little. ”Look, I am not trying to belittle you. I just want and need you to take care of yourself.” 

Your head tilted as your eyes held nothing but defiance in them. You felt your breathing pick up, uncontrollably, and how that pounding headache seemed to double, you started feeling a little lightheaded. But you chose to do what you’d been doing for god knows how long now. You ignored it. 

”I don’t, I don’t need you constantly watching over me.” You said, out of breath. 

Your wife’s expression dropped as she realized your condition and what could be happening next. She approached you cautiously, attempting to try and calm you down. ”Y/N, darling, this is not about control. It’s about caring for you.” She told calmly, cupping your face with her soft palm. 

You shook your head, ”You suffocate me, Larissa! I can’t breathe with you hovering over me all the time!” 

Larissa’s heart sank at that. She never meant for it to come to this. She only wanted the best for you, to protect you. 

”Y/N, please, I…” 

Your breathing laboured and before she could finish, your legs gave way and you collapsed on the cold, hard floor. 

”Y/N!” Larissa’s voice came out as a terrified cry as she rushed forward to try and catch you, but she was too late. 

Tears welled up in her eyes as she knelt beside you, shaking you gently and trying to wake you up. ”Y/N, can you hear me?! Please, say something..” 

Your eyes fluttered open, but you couldn’t focus on anything. Your breathing was still laboured and the words you tried to speak came out as a strained whisper. 

”Y/N, I’m taking you to the infirmary.” She breathed out as she scooped you up in her arms and rushed out the classroom. 

-

Since then, you and Larissa made an agreement. Well, you didn’t have much say in it, since Larissa demanded it. 

Larissa began monitoring your schedule, making sure you were following the new schedule she had made for you. And there was no room for negotiaton, absolutely no exceptions. 

Larissa also began cooking more, preparing the meals with care and love, making sure each one was balanced with important nutrients to get your energy levels for the better. 

Bedtime was the most strictly monitored. As evening approached, Larissa would guide you through a calming routine. She’d prepare a warm bath with your favourite scents, she’d slip in as well and wash your hair for you, massaging your head to calm you down. Then, she’d dress you into comfortable pyjamas and lead you to bed, prepare you a nice cup of tea and dim the lights. 

And she’d lull you to sleep with soothing caresses and words of affirmation, telling you how much she loved you, again and again, kissing your whole body as she did so. 

And it worked perfectly. You were feeling both, physically and mentally better. The dark circles under your eyes were slowly fading away, your energy starting to gain back. You also growed to appreciate your wife a thousand times more.

One evening, you were sitting in your shared bedroom, by your desk. Your laptop was open and you were determined to finish grading some papers for your students. Then, Larissa entered the room, the stern look on her face telling everything. ”Darling, it’s time for dinner.” 

You sighed, closing the laptop as you didn’t want to argue about it. And you were starving too. 

You ate in silence with her, you occasionally stealing glances at her. The way she fussed about your portion sizes, making sure you got the right nutrients for your health - you heart warmed as it was all an expression of love. 

Once you were finished, she led you to bed, undressing you and helping you with your pyjamas. I could’ve done that myself, you thought. 

”Now, off to bed. You need your rest, dearest.” 

You smiled as she laid down next to you, caressing your hair and kissing you softly. And you kissed her back, again and again.  Soon, you fell into a peaceful slumber, under Larissa’s loving gaze. She laid a final kiss on your forehead, ”I love you, my darling.” She whispered before drifting off as well. 

And if you looked outside, you’d have noticed that the fog had finally cleared. 

[ukulelevillainwrites]

who follows the rules anyway?

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9

final part

pairing: anthony lockwood x reader

word count : 6.3k

note: so here we are, some 8 months later this series is done! having mixed feelings rn but anyway i'm so glad i got to share this with you guys and there's a lot more to come

taglist: @demigoddess-of-ghosts ; @sub-text ; @mothman21 ; @aislinrayne ; @oblivious-idiot ; @neewtmas ; @maraschinomerry ; @bella-rose29 ; @bobbys-not-that-small ; @novelizt ; @fudosl ; @archiveoftara ; @cassiopeiia24

[from Lockwood’s pov]

It was still early when he started to emerge from his dreamless sleep. The few hours of rest he managed to get weren’t enough to drown out the confusion that had taken over his thoughts ever since Barnes had showed up yesterday. The sun wasn’t up yet. Time stood still and everything was quiet. He tossed and turned trying to fall back asleep but the blinking of the ghost lamp around the corner kept lighting up his room in a soft fluorescent light.

After y/n had gone up to the attic yesterday, he had stayed with George discussing new plans. They had spent dinner going over their notes from the previous weeks, their scribbling blackening the white cloth with new ideas. The problem was that they needed to take on new cases and planning for the party had already exhausted them. He didn’t have the heart to tell her that Dufour would have to wait a few more weeks until they were ready to strike again. The plate George had prepared for her was going cold and not seeing her come down, Lockwood had tried to bring it up for her. He had been relieved to find her fast asleep and not brooding about Barnes’ news. Even though she had woken up late after the night they spent at the fundraiser, she hadn’t seemed to be doing so great. He really hoped it was the champagne and not something else.

Thinking back to the night before, it was a miracle she had talked to him at all that afternoon. He had tried from the very beginning to separate work from his personal life. Whatever was the nature of his feelings towards her, whether it be hatred or otherwise, they had to have each other’s back in the field and that was all that mattered. Somehow, she still managed to tear down his walls of defense. Saying he had lost control at that party would have been an understatement. From the moment her lips stained his cheek red, all logic flew out the window. Between his proximity, his jealousy and the few terms of endearment that had slipped his mouth during the night, he had turned their working relationship into a minefield without a doubt.

She had rolled over, interrupting his train of thoughts. He had looked at her with fondness while she stretched in her sleep before settling back on her side. He then had gone back downstairs, thinking that rest would probably do her some good. He hadn’t had the opportunity to bring her even more bad news that night. But now here he was, the following day, with this unpleasant discussion still ahead of him and it certainly wasn’t going to let him fall back asleep. He reluctantly pushed his blanket away and pulled his grey hoodie over his head.

After his usual breakfast tea, and a second mug for comfort, Lockwood paced around the library while he waited for y/n to wake up. He had to tell her she wouldn’t get her revenge any time soon, the sooner the better. But did he really have to? The last time he refused to help her they had one of their worst fights. He certainly didn’t want that to happen again. All he wanted was for them to get along. That was a lie. What he really wanted was for her to look at him with the same fondness she had the night before, even just for an instant. He wanted her to tell him what she had meant when she’d admitted she had let her feelings get the best of her. He wanted to hold her in his arms again. What a mistake this had been. The three of them would go under if they didn’t take on new cases soon. And they would all have him to blame, just because he let his feelings get in the way of his work.

When he looked back at the clock on the wall, it was already 8:30. y/n had been supposedly asleep for twelve hours now. Granted she didn’t look too well yesterday, she still should have been awake by now.

For the third time, he went back to the kitchen for another mug of tea. He ran towards the door when he finally heard footsteps coming that way. He was greeted with George’s disheveled look instead of the person he was expecting to see. His smile faltered and he went back to standing next to the counter without saying a word.

“Good morning to you too…”

He poured his friend a cup of tea as a form of apology.

“Sorry,” he said while handing it to him, “I thought you were y/n”

George stared at him with a torn expression, hesitating between a snide comment or a sarcastic joke. He took a sip of his tea and sighed.

“She’s been asleep for a while now.”

Before Lockwood could share his worry, a knock on the front door interrupted him.

“Did we have any appointments scheduled today?”

“No, the last one I scheduled is tomorrow at 10”

He frowned and went back up the few steps and answered the door. Lucy and Norrie smiled at him, brandishing a dessert box from the corner shop.

“Lucy, you shouldn’t have. We owe everything to you. I should be the one buying you doughnuts.”

“It’s not too late for that!” She winked.

“Did everything go well with DEPRAC?” Norrie asked.

“Well…” He hesitated. “Not exactly. Come in.”

He ushered them inside, explaining the talk they had with Barnes the day before.

“How did she take it?” Norrie asked about y/n.

“I’m not sure…”

Lucy placed the box of treats on the small table in the hall to take off her coat and knocked over some of the items lying there.

Apologizing, she bent down to retrieve them. She put them back and handed Lockwood a camera film.

“You shouldn’t let that lie around out of its wrapping paper, the dust could damage it.”

“What’s this?”

“I don’t know I knocked it over just then.”

He put it in his pocket, wondering where it could have come from, and looked nervously at the clock in the living room. Lucy hung her coat in the hall before taking back the box they had brought and making her way into the kitchen. It took him a second to realize that her coat was hanging in the spot where y/n’s usually was. He looked down and noticed her shoes weren’t there either. Either she had gone to bed with them, or something was wrong. And he had a hunch it was the latter. He didn’t think twice and climbed the steps two by two in a rush to the attic. As he had suspected, her bed was empty. It had been a long time since she had bailed on them, and he thought he wouldn’t have to handle this kind of situation anymore. But apparently, he had failed to see how much this issue affected her. Barnes had told her explicitly to not go look for evidence herself and she had done the exact opposite. Though it would be unfair to blame her for it, he probably would have done the same thing. He rushed back downstairs and stormed into the kitchen.

“y/n is gone.”

The serious look on his face was enough to make the room go silent.

“Where could she be?” Lucy asked, worried.

“Considering this,” he tossed the camera film from earlier to George, “I’m going to guess she went to get evidence herself last night.”

Another silence stretched as they all considered his words. George seemed to shut down. He stared at the table without a word. When his eyes came back into focus, he asked

“When do you think she left?”

“I don’t know, I didn’t hear anything. Did you?”

“I thought I heard something, but I figured it was you. “

“When was it?” Lockwood pressed.

“Around three?” He stood up and pushed his chair back. “Or four maybe?”

She had been gone for over five hours and still hadn’t come home. She could have gone anywhere, she could have met anybody… before he could spiral any further, George got up. He didn’t wait for Lockwood to answer and headed towards the hall.

“Where are you going? We need to think! Where could she have gone?”

“I don’t know but I’m going to find her.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I’ll figure it out.”

Lockwood had to put himself between the door and his friend to keep him from taking a step further. George looked back at him defiantly.

“George, no. I’m not losing you too because you wanted to play hero.”

“That’s rich coming from you!” He yelled back. “I’m doing this. She’s only going after Dufour because I shared my suspicions in the first place. This is all my fault and I need to fix it.” He mumbled.

“We,” he emphasized, “need to be smart about this.”

“We don’t have time! The last time she wandered by herself at night she got chased by relic men, she could be-”

“I know!” Lockwood shouted.

They stared at each other, considering the unspoken words. The air was thick with tension and panic started to clutch his chest tighter.

“Someone needs to go after her.” George insisted.

“And someone needs to get DEPRAC.” Lockwood stared at his best friend with an unspoken plea. George looked back at him with a furrowed brow, fidgeting with the zipper of his orange parka. Lockwood was used to the researcher’s passive expressions. Sometimes, they could barely be called expressions at all. But now his eyes were filled with worry, a genuine please begging to let him go.

“I… I’ll take care of DEPRAC.”

George sighed in relief and reached for the door once more.

“But you are not going there alone.” Lockwood said, resting a hand on his shoulder before he could run off.

“We’ll go!” Lucy intervened.

“Are- are you sure?” Norrie asked, surprised by her girlfriend’s sudden interest for dangerous missions.

“She’s our friend too, and she needs our help. Where do we begin?”

---

[back to reader’s pov]

The sound of a window breaking jolted her awake. Her head was hurting, an ache pressing on her temples so much her vision was blurry. She released a pained sigh, barely noticing the girl getting up from her fall through the back window who was shaking the last remnants of glass out of her wavy auburn hair. She only noticed she was there when she took her by the shoulders, shaking her awake. It took her embarrassingly long to realize that Lucy was the one coming to her rescue. Before she could open her mouth, the girl slapped her across the face, hard enough to make her lose balance and trip over the edge of the chair she was sitting on. The ties at her wrists and feet kept her in place and the sudden pain from tugging on them woke her up for good. Through heavy eyelids she turned her head to see the back window intact and the room she was in empty.

The sun was up now. She wasn’t quite sure how she had ended up here but clearly her suicidal plan, if anyone could even call it that, had backfired in the worst way. She vaguely recalled leaving the house in the middle of the night with nothing but a camera in her bag and heading towards Fittes. The rest of the night was a blur. She guessed from the ache at the back of her head that she had found who she had been looking for but they had found her too. Their identity became clear when she heard voices coming from the corridor leading to the room she was held in. She pretended to be unconscious and listened as their steps echoed closer.

“I’m not in the business of knowing what he’s up to. I sell him the sources he asks for and move on. But with that DEPRAC audit, I’m losing my biggest client.”

“What do I care?” A man’s voice asked dejectedly.

“No clients for me means no payment for you, you idiot. We need a new buyer and we need them now!” A door slammed, making her jump. She kept her eyes closed, listening to the voices becoming less muffled with each step.

“Can you find me a contact in the Society, or do I have to ask someone else?” Dufour asked, as pleasant as she had known her when she got fired.

“I’ll take care of it.”

“Yes, you will.” The two of them entered the room she was held in. “And watch her, make sure she doesn’t cause any more trouble. You know what to do if she does.”

Despite the shudder running down her spine, y/n remained still. She would not let the ominous threats break her spirit. She would not give into her fear. Time stood still when the door closed, leaving her alone with who she could assume was a relic-man armed to the teeth. She listened to his footsteps pace the room while trying to keep her breath steady. However, she could not help flinching when the footsteps stopped a few steps away from her, the sound of heavy boots resonating in the room before stopping in an even louder silence.

“You can stop acting, you’re really terrible at this.” Said a familiar voice.

She had expected a low, menacing voice but instead it was El’s sardonic tone that made her open her eyes. To her surprise, the first thing she saw was in fact a relic-man standing menacingly a few steps away from her. El was leaning against the wall on her left, playing with a pocketknife.

“So… I see you’re still terrible at making decisions.”

“You really think you’re better when you have me tied up in a basement?” The pounding in her head made it hard to think.

“This isn’t a basement and we wouldn’t have had to if you had just minded your own business.”

“Where are we then?”

“You really think you’re that clever? You’re not subtle. The only thing you can do is mess things up!”

“You mean keep you and Dufour from dealing relics you stole from your clients? I won’t let you get away with it that easily, no.”

“You ruined everything.” Their voice sounded final, decisive. A few nights ago they had threatened her without shame. Today, it was a death sentence.

“What did I do to you El? We were friends. Then, out of nowhere you trick me to get me fired and you get murderous tendencies?”

“It must be nice remaining so unaware all this time.” They sighed dreamily, however their face remained stern.

“What are you talking about?”

“Before coming to Fittes, you worked at Tendy’s, correct?”

“How did you-”

“My uncle died seven years ago. My cousin took it hard, and I’d always been close to them, so it wasn’t easy for me either. He came back, and they had to hire someone to fix it. Tendy’s agents came by, messed up the case. They couldn’t find the source so we had to watch them take every last thing that belonged to my uncle to burn it in the furnaces. Grieving wasn’t easy after that. Those stupid kids took every last memory we had of him because they were incompetent. Then, a few years later, guess who happened to be my new roommate?”

y/n stayed silent.

“Not only did I have to live with you but I had to see you succeed and get promoted above me when we both knew perfectly well how unfit you were for the job.”

“I was thirteen. I followed what my supervisor told us to do.”

“You didn’t get any better at making decisions later on! Listening to you and your amazing cases working with Kipps, saying how much you wanted to climb the corporate ladder of the Fittes organization. Not on my watch. You didn’t deserve it then and you certainly don’t deserve it now.”

“And getting me fired wasn’t enough?”

“Of course not! When I applied to get the spot I deserved all along I got denied because Kipps took your side! I had to work with Dufour because of you!”

She eyed Dufour’s arm man, wondering if El’s words were going to put them both in danger.

“Believe me if you had worked with her longer, you would know that Rasler won’t stand up for her.”

She sent them a sorry look. Despite the ties around her wrists and ankles, she couldn’t help the guilt that rose in her. She vaguely recalled the case El mentioned but not enough for her sympathy to sound genuine.

“It’s not too late. I can put in a good word for you with Kipps, you can join his team!”

“None of it matters now. All I want is to make sure you won’t cause any more trouble.”

They turned their back to her and nodded to Rasler. The man loomed over her with a menacing stare, taking out a knife to execute orders.

“El please! I swear I can make it up to you!”

They ignored her, only turning around to enjoy the view with a sly smirk.

“Please!” She begged, tears filling her eyes.

Rasler was upon her, the blade resting against the crook of her neck, the cool of the metal sending shivers down her spine. She shut her eyes, waiting for the fatal moment. Before her executioner could finish what he had started, the sound of a window breaking resonated in her ears. She didn’t know if she was hallucinating again or not, but one moment the knife was pressing down her neck and the next it was gone. She tentatively opened an eye to see if she was dreaming. Lucy was holding the man down, disarming him of his weapon. Behind him, Norrie and George were keeping El from escaping.

They tripped Norrie who cried out in pain and used the distraction to slip out. George ran after them. In the commotion, Lucy lost focus long enough to give her adversary the advantage back. He reached for the knife he had dropped. Lucy lunged to reach it before him, tackling him in the process. y/n couldn’t do anything but watch the scene unfold as she pulled on her ties to try to help her friend. She should have known that her previous hallucination meant Lucy was coming to her rescue. It had been right before. The least she could do was return the favor, but her ties wouldn’t let go. She yelled at Lucy to watch out when Rasler caught the knife that was inches away from his fingers. He swung the blade at her face making y/n flinch. When she looked back up, Lucy had gotten away. She grabbed the first thing she could find, in this case a steel chair lying around, and hit the relic-man with all her strength. The man went down instantly. She grabbed his knife and cut y/n loose. Her wrists were burning from the tight rope that had almost cut all circulation in her hands. She thanked Lucy, tears filling her eyes again, but before she could hug the girl, she shouted

“Come on! We have to catch the other one!” and left the room in a hurry. y/n followed closely to find El stuck, their back under George’s knee. He had a tight grip on their arms and was holding them down on the ground. The look they sent her way made her blood run cold. Norrie came rushing back, saying how she had lost track of Dufour. Her friends were already planning their next move, but she still hadn’t registered the fact that they were here. They were all here to save her even though she had walked into a death trap of her own volition. She was still dizzy from the blow she must have received on the head and the adrenaline wasn’t mixing well.

“Are you okay?” Lucy placed a hand on her shoulder, stabilizing her spinning head. y/n wrapped her arms around her shoulders, hugging the girl close and taking her first deep breath in almost an hour.

“Thank you for coming.” She said between tears.

Caught up in the moment, she didn’t realize the commotion and the noises getting closer to them. The doors flew open and five or six DEPRAC agents stormed in, relieving George and handcuffing El. As soon as he stood up, she hugged him tightly too without letting go, even when she spotted Dufour in DEPRAC’s custody in one of their vans. George had never been one for physical affection, but he didn’t let her go either.

“How did you find me?” She mumbled, her mouth half smashed against his shoulder.

“Don’t ask me it was all Lucy. She led us to you in record breaking time.”

“Really?” She parted from him and looked at the girl with a questioning stare.

“I don’t really know I just… had a hunch.” Lucy replied. They exchanged a complicit glance.

“You know,” George added in a lower voice, “I think she could be a great addition to the team. You two seem to complement each other quite well.”

“I agree.” y/n smiled.

“I’ll talk to Lockwood once this is all over.”

“Wait, speaking of, where is he?”

George didn’t have to answer. She spotted him outside the warehouse, right at the entrance, talking with inspector Barnes. The discussion seemed to be heated. She threw another glance towards her friends, thanking them again for saving her from her idiotic mistake.

“Don’t worry about it.” Norrie said. “We all make mistakes.” She paused, noticing y/n’s insistent stare somewhere above her shoulder. She looked back and smiled.

“You should go see him, he’s been really worried.”

y/n smiled back at her before heading towards him.

“This is not what we agreed upon!” Lockwood retorted, losing his usually impenetrable composure.

“Keep complaining and I make it three.”

Lockwood sighed, looking away in anger. Whatever they were discussing, he did not seem pleased. He crossed his arms, his jaw clenched. Suddenly he froze, noticing her approaching. He did not hesitate and walked over to her in two short strides, holding her close before she could say anything. She hugged him back, his familiar scent enveloping her in a comforting embrace. Her heart was beating a mile a minute, but she could feel his was too.

“I’m so glad you’re okay.”

“I’m so sorry, Lockwood.”

He held her closer at those words, leaving a kiss on her forehead. She closed her eyes and leaned into him. One kiss turned into a second, then a third at the corner of her eye, on her cheek, her jaw. His nose was practically touching hers. She thought she might start to levitate further and further away from the ground. He stared into her eyes, determination highlighting his sharp features. Her heart sank to her stomach and took flight at the same time. The sudden feeling surprised her yet made her feel light as a feather. She smiled so much her cheeks hurt, and she couldn’t help her eyes dropping to his lips with anticipation.

“I can’t blame you for being a little reckless now, can I?” He smiled and everything was right again, nothing else mattered now.

“Lockwood!” Barnes shouted after shutting the door to the van taking El to Scotland Yard’s headquarters. He straightened up and took a step back, startled by the inspector calling his name. “I’ll see you three on Monday. Don’t be late.”

He looked down and frowned, frustration slowly turning to resolution.

“What is that about?”

“Let’s get you home now.” He defiantly ignored her, his usual wolfish grin proudly trying to win her over.

“Lockwood…”

“I’ll make you tea!” He added to convince her.

She would let it go… for now. The only thing she wanted more than honesty was going back to Portland Row, back home, back to safety.

The five of them went home and settled around the Thinking Cloth to finally enjoy the treats the girls had brought earlier that day. The tea tasted particularly sweet now that this whole case was finally put to rest, relieving everyone’s mind. The group was cheerful, happy to share a moment of peace. After the first round of doughnuts, a comfortable silent fell over the kitchen, the only noises coming from the clinking of mugs.

“I need to thank you all again.” y/n said.

They all smiled warmly at her.

“I wouldn’t be here without you, you saved my life. Lucy you came in just at the right time.”

“And I’d do it again.” The girl answered without a trace of doubt.

“I thought you wanted to stay as far from the field as possible?” Norrie asked, surprised.

“Well, that wasn’t really a case…”

y/n sent a look to George who was already staring at her, the same thought probably crossing his mind.

“George, thank you for giving me a home.”

“I’m the one who got you in this mess… I’m the reason you got fired in the first place.”

“El would have found a way to get me fired no matter what you did. None of it is your fault.” She reached out and squeezed his hand.

“And Lockwood, thank you for letting me stay.” She concluded. She looked back at him. He simply smiled. The intimacy of the moment they had shared a few hours prior brought heat to her cheeks.

When the box of treats was finished, the girls got up and y/n hugged them again, still overwhelmed and grateful. The five of them walked back into the hall, agreeing to spend a day together soon to get their minds off work, whatever it may be. When y/n opened the front door to usher the girls out she found herself face to face with Quill Kipps.

“I just heard about Mrs. Dufour!” He said, panting. “I’m glad you’re okay! This is all behind you now.”

“Yes, it is. Thank you for checking up on me, it’s very sweet.”

“Well, actually I come with news. Dufour’s arrest means that Fittes is considering offering you your job back. As your team leader the final decision is mine to make, and I think you know what I’ve decided. The question is, would you like to?”

“Come back? To work at Fittes? With you?”

She couldn’t help but look back into the hall, where George and Lockwood stared at her expectantly, waiting for her answer. She looked back at Kipps who waited with the same anticipation.

“Um I-I…”

“I’ll give you time to think about it. We can always discuss it over coffee, you still owe me one.” He winked. “I’d love to work with you again.” He climbed down the few steps in front of the door before turning back into the street.

This offer was the last thing she had expected that day. She hadn’t even considered the possibility of Fittes wanting her back if she managed to prove the truth about Dufour. But now the dream she had pursued most of her life was rising up from its ashes and Kipps had dropped this on her like it was a regular everyday decision. Norrie and Lucy smiled as they walked passed her, patting her on the back before leaving her to it, not uttering a word as to not disturb the tumultuous contradicting thoughts flooding her mind. She shut the door and turned around to see George still staring at her. Lockwood was gone.

“What are you going to do?”

“I don’t… know. I mean… It was my dream until a few months ago. But I’ve moved on. I’m happy here with you guys. But if I don’t take it am I missing out? What should I do?”

“I can’t tell you what to do, but I’ll support you no matter what you decide.” He looked up towards the landing. “I’m sure Lockwood will too.”

She looked in the same direction he did with a sad smile and slowly went up the stairs. On the first floor, she heard shuffling coming from Lockwood’s room. She got closer and saw him pacing around his bedroom. He stopped when he caught her eyes looking through the half-open door. He tried to smile at her, but Kipps’ offer definitely had an effect on him.

“I don’t know what I’ll do yet.” She tried to reassure him.

“You should take it.” He said, his tone definitive, like he had made the decision for her.

“I’m not sure.”

“Yes, you are. It’s what’s best for you. I can’t offer you what he can. Not the same wage, not the same reputation, not the same freedom…”

The last criteria made her chuckle slightly.

“I’m pretty sure I’m still more free here than at Fittes.”

“Not anymore…”

“What do you mean?”

He stayed silent.

“That conversation with Barnes…” She understood. “What did he say.”

“Lockwood & Co. is under a tutelage of sorts. We can’t work on any case that Barnes didn’t assign and without his supervision…”

The terms seemed extreme. She couldn’t understand why all of a sudden the inspector would apply such restrictive conditions to the small agency.

“Why would he do that?”

“Because otherwise he refused to help me.”

“Help you?” It took her a moment to register. “Oh… Oh! I am responsible for this?”

“No! This isn’t your fault.”

“But if I hadn’t gone through with my mediocre plan and gotten into that much trouble then none of this would have happened!”

He took a step closer and looked down at her with a stern look.

“This is not your fault. His terms could have been twice as bad and I still would have agreed to them.”

She looked at him with a matching intensity, unable to argue. No matter how much she wanted to apologize again, promise she could make it right, she couldn’t find the words.

“The next two months will be hard, but it’s worth it.”

The sentiment was sweet and the intention behind his words was enough to make her heart leap but laughter was all that managed to escape her mouth.

“Two months? You’re being that dramatic for two months of supervision?” She laughed harder, holding on to his arm. “I’m sure you’ll be alright.” She smiled at him, softened by how ridiculously attractive he looked when he took offence.

“I still think you’d be better off with Kipps.”

“No, I don’t think so.”

With a confidence she had never expressed before she closed the gap between them. Her hand was still on his arm, her grip tighter to bring him close. His lips were soft against hers but she could feel how he froze at the unexpected contact. She didn’t insist and drew back, apologizing for her sudden inappropriate behaviour. He caught her hand before she could take a step back, his intense stare still set on her with a determination she had only seen him exude in the field. It was his turn to close his hand firmly around her arm to bring her back to him. His other hand found the back of her head. The awkwardness of her apologies was quickly forgotten when he brought his lips down to hers, the need to be closer to him overpowering everything else. She brought her hands up behind his head, fingers buried in his hair while he wrapped his arm tighter around her waist. She forgot where she was, barely noticing the wall he was pressing her up against. Nothing in the world mattered anymore. The lack of sleep, the hostage situation, Kipps’ offer, everything seemed a mile away. All she wanted was to feel his breath and his lips against hers as long as possible. They didn’t want to let each other go. When he pulled away for air, she barely gave him time before kissing him again and when she pulled away, he chased her lips like it was his reason to live. Each kiss grew hungrier and more passionate than the last. She bit his bottom lip on a dare and the response she got made her want to do more. The noise that escaped his throat as he breathed into her made her knees buckle and she sighed with desire. He slid his tongue against hers, his hand holding on to her neck tighter, his strong fingers making a mess of her hair. Just like he had done earlier that day, he drifted from her lips to her jaw before kissing down her neck, leaving marks here and there.

“Please stay.” He begged. She had rarely heard him so vulnerable.

“Of course I’ll stay.” She said. “I could never leave you.” She wanted to add, but he was already kissing her again, thankfulness mixed with something more.

“Lockwood-”

He looked up into her eyes, leaving her neck for a moment.

“Please, call me Anthony.”

She was caught off guard by the request. She had never used his first name, not even once. It felt strangely intimate using it. She kissed him softly, touched by his trust.

“We should probably discuss how we’re gonna work together if we’re a thing…”

“Yes definitely.”

There was a silence, neither of them knowing where to start. He was still holding her close and her arms were still around his neck, the proximity filled with unresolved tension.

“Maybe we could… take it slow? Sleep on it and see how it goes tomorrow?” She offered hesitantly.

“Yes that’s… that’s a good idea.”

They remained a while longer, gazing into each other’s eyes. Reluctantly, she slid her hands down, stroking his shoulders and chest before letting go. He unwrapped his hand from her waist and she instantly missed his touch.

They didn’t look away from each other as they walked out towards the door to his room. They must have looked ridiculous but she didn’t care.

“George will probably call us down for dinner any time now.”

“I’ll see you then.” She said with a small smile before heading towards the attic.

None of it felt real. Once in her room she realized that she didn’t even know why she went there. Mechanically, she picked up her hairbrush to untangle the mess done by Lockwood’s hands. Anthony’s. She corrected herself. Her lips were still tingly and soft purple marks started to show on her neck. George would have a lot to say about that. George who was probably preparing something delicious downstairs and who would call her any minute now. She wasn’t hungry though and didn’t know if she could eat anything after a day like that. Guilt crept up on her when she realized she would probably skip dinner, but it was quickly replaced by an overpowering feeling from deep inside her. A different kind of hunger.

She climbed down the stairs leading to her room and opened the door to find Lockwood already standing there.

“I don’t want to take it slow.” She said and he smiled instantly. He obviously had similar ideas.

She led him up the stairs in a hurry. The few minutes they had spent apart felt like she had been stuck underwater and she was finally coming up for air now that his lips were against hers again. From the moment they first met she had loathed his confidence and how pretentious it made him. But now that he slid his hands under her shirt, their warmth spreading across the skin of her back, she had to admit that she was rather fond of it. She traced his jaw with her fingers and lowered them down his neck until she reached the collar of his shirt that was getting in the way. Slowly, she untied the knot of his tie, and she could have fainted from the noise he made. His tie hit the floor and was quickly joined by her shirt, the two of them collapsing on her bed blissfully unaware of the warm plates waiting for them three floors below.

---

She poured George his tea and prepared it the way she knew he liked it, trying desperately to make up for the night before. She was sorry they had left him eat by himself, but she wasn’t that sorry if she was honest with herself. She had not stopped smiling since she had woken up next to Lockwood and she couldn’t help it, not even with George insistently staring at her.

“So… I guess you’re staying with us then?” He tried to ask innocently but his smile betrayed him. “Where’s Lockwood?”

“He’s taking a shower.” She answered a little too fast.

“He probably needs it.” George mumbled to himself.

She threw the dish towel at him, making him laugh. She was not going to hear the end of it. But her smile hadn’t left her lips. When they sat down in their usual seats, they heard Lockwood in the hallway speaking on the phone. A few moments later he joined them, his smile matching hers. He kissed the top of her head before sitting next to her.

“So, what do we do now?” George asked.

“Well, inspector Barnes just called to assign us our first supervised case.”

“You seem oddly happy about that.”

Before he could make any other comment, he understood his friend’s good mood was not coming from work but from the girl he was gazing at.

“Is this going to be a problem? We have work to do!”

“No, you’re right.” y/n said, putting distance between her and her now boyfriend. “Please continue.”

With his usual grin, Lockwood settled back into his role as agency leader.

“George, do you know anything about Kensal Green cemetery?”

[adambadeau]

JFK IN ITALY

A short story. Content warning for.. drugs and pasta. Dedicated to my great grandma who was born in Italy. My kween.

Based on a true story. But not really

Please read to the end, you won't regret it

John Fitzgerald Kennedy, positively baked, was walking around stranded in Italy. He didn't know how or when he got there but he remembered seeing the Leaning Tower of Pisa fall over and he took some stupid pictures of the Colosseum or whatever it was called. Someone roofied him the night before and he hadn't slept with a girl that wasn't his wife in four hours.

After doing some government weed, he was hungry, and because he was the prez, he could have whatever he wanted. He loved him some fettucine alfredo, and why not have some made by the PRESIDENT OF ALFREDO, Alfredo de Lelio, who it was named after, obviously. Anyway, they got him in right away because he was the prez.

As soon as Alfredo got word of JFK, he set to work making the best alfredo a prez could eat.

"Ciao, ciao," he said, cheerfully, coming out with a steaming hot plate of alfredo. By now, the paparazzi was here. They were all trying to snap a piccy up JFK's skirt. He was trying to light a cigar. He was having a really bad headache because he hadn't slept with a girl that wasn't his wife in four and a half hour.

"Uh, err, uh, my cigar won't light, uh," JFK said, feebly attempting to light the match, but the match obviously wasn't working. So he struck it on the tablecloth, and the tablecloth caught on fire. The authorities on the scene steered the paparazzi, the chef, and the president to another table that wasn't in flames. Alfredo was unfazed.

"Your fettucine, signor," he said smoothly, pushing the big giant cart with the big giant plate next to the table.

JFK was very pleased with it. That is, until Chef Alfredo stuffed his big fat fingers into his goddamn fettucine alfredo!

"You're, uh, stuffing your, er, big fat fingers into my goddamn fettucine alfredo!" JFK exclaimed in anguish. This was the worst thing that would ever happen to him.

"You no like?" replied Chef Alfredo, then proceeding to shove the handful smack into JFK's face. It was very uncomfortable and he had a fork, which he very well could've used

"Uh, yeah, I like, uh, but I really could've..." his voice trailed off ."CAN YOU PLEASE STOP WITH THE FETTUCINE?!" There was fettucine alfredo on the tablecloth, fettucine on his tie, and his cigar tasted like fettucine. But his request was heeded and now they just kinda stared at each other awkwardly.

"Whatsa matter, John boy, you no like-a dapasta?" Alfredo chuckled, breaking the silence as JFK thought about how he hadn't slept with a girl who wasn't his wife in 4 hours and 55 minutes.

"No, no, it's er, uh, great, uh. What kind of pasta is it, uh angel hair? Because, err, uhh, I'd recognize Marilyn's golden locks even in, uhh, alfredo sauce." He winced.

"You open up-pa your moth for fettucine, unless you like-a your pasta al presidente." Alfredo laughed at his own joke which gave JFK a chance to wipe off his face with the tablecloth (thus having him moved to another one again) and order something strong. Alfredo clapped his hands together and called for more pasta.

"You like?" he asked.

JFK twirled it around on his plate with the fork, giggled, and blushed. "Uh, yes."

Everyone clapped and cheered because he liked the pasta.

"Now, uh, I could really go for some, er uh, pizza," he said.

Everyone booed.

So anyway, JFK took his pizza to-go and went back to his hotel room, where Marilyn Monroe was. But Alfredo had roofied his alfredo, and he laid down in bed and went to sleep instead of, well, paying Marilyn a visit. He almost died in his sleep from lack of sleeping with a woman who wasn't his wife for 6 hours. This was probably the worst thing that would ever happen to him.

In the middle of the night, he woke up, and got in his open top convertible to have a pleasant drive around in the Dallas sunshine. The date was September 11, 1881, and he was going to the Pan American Exposition to see a play.

As he drove around in his convertible, he noticed his friend Franz Ferdinand, also in his convertible.

"Hello, Franz!" he called.

"Hello, JFK!" said Franz. "How are you?"

"Oh, yanno, just drivin' around with the top down."

"Me too! See you later, Mr. Prez!"

"See you later, Mr. Archduke!"

FIN

don't take this seriously

[milequaritchsslut]

Neteyam x Dead Reader

Summary: After your death during a attack from the sky people, Neteyam doesn’t know what to do without his mate.

Warnings: blood, death, depression, sadness, rotting food, crying.

Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

…

It still felt like yesterday, the day you died. It’s already been 3 months since that day and still he felt no different. You were the first thing he thought of when he got up, and the last thing he thought of when he went to sleep. He missed you so much, he still hasn’t forgiven himself for letting you come on that mission with him. Why would he do that? Is he that fucking dumb? He knew it wasn’t a good idea from the start, but he could never say no to you,

Everyday seemed to be getting worse, you were the only thing on his mind. He’s forgotten when happiness really is, you were the definition of happiness in his eyes. He wouldn’t leave his hut for days, sometimes weeks. When his family checked up on him, they would always find him curled up in a ball on his mat.

His family worried for him, they didn’t think he would ever come back from this and he wasn’t planning on it. He refused to eat without you, sometimes he would even imagine your fragile figure sitting with him just so he could get a few bites down. He hadn’t seen the sunlight in days. Tuk had begged him to come out and fly with her for weeks, but still he refused as usual. “Maybe tomorrow Tuk” but tomorrow never came. That was the harsh reality they had to accept. He lost his other half, now what was he supposed to do? Just act like it never happened?

He missed your contagious laugh, it would fill rooms up and his heart. You were so perfect to him, so why did Ewya let this happen? He had turned his back on her. He couldn’t forgive the great mother for this. Your death was too much to bear, he had never gone through something like this. The people say one of the worst kinds of deaths is a mates, and they were right. The clan would leave fruit baskets and beautiful gifts for him. Never taking them, they would rot away by his entrance leaving a dreadful smell to linger in his home and on his body.

He would replay moments in his mind sometimes for hours to just make it feel like you were there. You had this way with words that he missed, you always knew what to say to him when he was down so where were you now? Dead that’s where you were, 6 feet under. You two were attached at the hip, where he went is where you went. If he wasn’t in his pod mourning he would be connecting to the tree of souls to get some kind of relief. He spent hours there, he would talk to you for hours and hours about missing you. You enjoyed it when he came to visit you, but you knew it wasn’t good for him. You encouraged him to go and talk to the other clan members but it was always some excuse ‘but it’s so much better here with you ma y/n’ or ‘they do not want to see me I am just a burden onto them’.

You knew everything about each other, your bond was unbreakable. His heart was shattered and scattered into pieces. His cries of grief could be heard at any time of the day, for miles and miles. The image of your stiff body laying on the ground was indented into his mind. You laid there unable to move from the hit, your amber eyes watched your mate pray to Ewya as he held you in his arms.

The bullet wound had hit your heart and was slowly killing you. Holding out your arm to feel your mates touch once again, your fingers grazing your mates cheek as you offered a smile. The last thing you wanted was for Neteyam to be crying. His salty tears dropped onto your bloody chest as he begged for you to stay awake. His cry’s flooded your senses, trying your best to stay awake. But this was inevitable, death would creep up on you one day. Slowly your eyelids started dropping, as you let the darkness cloud your vision.

[americas1suiteheart]

When Can I See You Again?

Patrick Stump x Gn! Reader

Here's the Ao3 link if you prefer to read on there :)

Summary; Pete sets Patrick up on a blind date with one of his friends. That friend just happens to be you, and regardless of how unenthusiastic the both of you were, the date goes more than well.

Notes; This might be shitty. I decided to write this at 12 in the morning, but it's fine because I get a fic out. I'm finally starting to become more active again (yay!). This is also cheesy as shit as always, as all my Patrick fics have been. :)

Warnings; Just some foul language, as always .

Volume: ■■■■■□□□

"Come on, Pete. Really, it's fine, I'm perfectly fine not having a boyfriend *or* girlfriend!"

"Y/n, you know I love and care for you, man, and that means finding you someone that you'll love, and that will love you. Trust me, the friend I'm setting you up with is awesome, you're gonna get along great with him."

"I really don't see why you think it's so important that I have one."

"Come on, Y/n. You're 19 years old, live alone, go to college, *and* work 6 hours a day on top of that. You need something to look forward to when you get home *OTHER* than sleeping."

"Pete I-"

"Nope! You're going on this date. Worst comes to worst, you don't like him and you just go back to your boring, horrible, unhealthy way of living."

"Fine, fine! I'm only agreeing to this so you shut up and stop bothering me. If I don't like it you have to promise me that you won't try to do this shit again, okay?"

"Deal." Pete says, putting his hand out to shake yours and you shake his back, settling on an agreement.

You'd been friends with Pete since you were a little kid. He was 4 years older than you, but you two lived next to each other when you were growing up, so he just became an immediate friend.

You loved him, you really did, but sometimes it was impossible to actually deal with him. Of course what he was doing was all in good intentions, and you hate to admit that he was right when he said you were lonely, but you felt that you unfortunately never had the time or energy to be in a romantic relationship with someone.

You go into your room and take your cellphone and apartment keys. You were already ready, and usually you would be spending your weekend sleeping an relaxing, Pete decided to set you up on some blind date with one of his friends, or one of the people he was in a band with to be more specific.

If this person were to be anything like Pete is, you probably won't go on with it, it sounds shitty but you could barely handle one Pete as it is.

"You ready, man?" Pete asks, getting up from the small couch you had in your small living room.

"Yeah." You say blandly.

"Be more optimistic about this, dude. You'll like him, or at least become friends with him, believe me, he's totally what you're into." Pete says, punching your shoulder and you to walk to the door.

"How do you know what my type is? What if I don't have a type?" You say, rubbing where he hit you.

"I just know, you know?" Pete shrugs, waiting for you to lock your door.

You sigh and roll your eyes as you make your way to your car.

"Okay, where is this place again?"

"It's just that diner across the street from that record shop we used to go to. The one we got kicked out of. Remember?" Pete said, sitting next to you in the passenger seat.

"Ooh, that place has the best burgers!" You exclaim, then drive out of the car lot onto the street.

You smile to yourself as you recall that memory. The last time you had gone to that diner you and Pete got kicked out for being too loud. You weren't usually the type of person to be loud or rambunctious, but Pete had the tendency to make you come out of your socially awkward shell when you hung out with him.

Pete talked to you the whole way, it was only a 10 minute drive from your apartment complex, but time always seemed to go by faster when he was ranting about, he always had the most interesting things to talk about, and this rant was about some of the songs that the band was recording.

You arrive at the diner and park your car. You and Pete get out and he goes up to the building window and points out a guy, seemingly around the same age as you, sitting at one of the back booths with two milkshakes in front of him.

"That's the guy you wanna go to. Call me when you two are done and try to have fun." Pete says, putting his hand on your shoulder.

"Wait, you're not going to stay in there with me? At least at another booth away from the one I'll be at?" You say, looking at Pete with wide eyes.

"I can't stay, I've got stuff to do, man. Plus, I don't wanna creep over you two." Pete says, walking away.

You were left standing there in complete shock. You'd fully expected for Pete to sit somewhere farther in the diner where he wouldn't be visible but still be there just because, and you were surprisingly upset and afraid when he said he wouldn't.

You take a deep breath and walk into the diner. You haven't been on a date since you were 16, and it definitely didn't work out then. If this little date somehow worked out and led to something more serious, it would be the first romantic relationship you would be in.

You make your way to the booth and stand awkwardly as you wait for him to notice you before you ask to sit.

"Uh, hey. I believe you're the guy that Pete set me up with?" You say quietly, rubbing the back of your neck.

The boy looks up and quickly fixes his posture. "Oh, uh. Yeah, yeah." He looks up at you and looks somewhere else after a few seconds.

"I, uh, do you think I could sit with you?"

"Oh, yeah, sorry about that, yeah of course you can."

You sit at the seat across from him, slowly sinking into the worn out booth seats.

You always thought that Pete was a pain because he was the complete opposite with you, but you now found that he was so much easier to talk to than another person that was just as awkward and quiet as you were.

This guy was cute. You don't tend to find people attractive, maybe because you're always in such a rush and tired with everything, but he was seriously cute.

His face was slightly on the chubbier side, he had a button nose and shoulder length hair with sideburns and a pair of glasses. That's pretty much what already did it for you, but his eyes that hid behind that pair of glasses were such a pretty colour that you were lucky enough to see within those few seconds of awkwardly looking at each other.

"Oh, I ordered you a milkshake. I didn't know what flavor you liked so I just got you vanilla. I hope you don't mind." He said, pushing the milkshake and straw closer to you.

"Oh! Thank you that's very sweet." You say, a smile on your face.

"Being that this is the first time meeting each other, we should probably introduce ourselves, I think?" You say after about a minute of swirling your straw around in your milkshake.

"Yeah, probably. I'm Patrick, I'm 18 and I just graduated high school. What about you?" Patrick laughs lightly.

"I'm Y/n, I'm 19 and am in my first year of college right now. I'm going to be completely honest, I don't really do anything or go out much. Pete usually drags me places to get me out more." You laugh.

"I totally get that. So, what do you do?" Patrick says after taking a drink of his milkshake.

"Well, I'm majoring in computer science right now and have a minor in music technology from an AP class in high school and am trying to get it for college, too so that I can do it professionally with theaters, venues, and maybe even bigger bands. After I finish my classes for the day, I work at a comic book shop most of the day and then I work at Hastings as a night shift sort of thing. So I don't really get breaks. But to be honest, It's actually something I like, a lot of people I know enjoy their resting time but I hate not having anything to do."

"Wow, that's impressive. So I'm assuming you don't really have time to do stuff like this, huh?"

"Yeah, I think this is like, the second date I've ever been on. The first one I'd been on was when I was 16. I never ended up hitting it off with the person, so I've also never been in a relationship. Anyways, enough about me, I want to know more about you." You say with a small smile, putting your elbows on the table and holding your hands together underneath your chin to keep your head upright.

"I'm in a band with Pete and a few other guys right now. I can play the drums, guitar, piano, and can sing, too. We're actually recording our first album together! But I also have a job, I just work at a retail store right now, nothing too special." Patrick says.

"That's nice. You like to keep it simple. I do wish I could actually appreciate my time to myself, honestly. Four instruments is impressive, though. I only know how to play the bass and it's only because Pete taught me so I could have something "fun to do and not be a loser" as Pete said. I do admit, though, I really enjoy it."

You've never actually talked this much with someone you just met before. Something just clicked with him, that made you feel comfortable and interested. You don't know why, but maybe this date isn't going as bad as you thought it would, and that Pete, unfortunately, was right. How he managed to know exactly who you would find interesting when you didn't even know yourself is beyond you, but right now, you're glad he did.

You continued to talk about interests and found you liked most of the same things, making the conversation all the more exciting and long.

"So, you said you had experience with music tech, right? Has Pete ever offered you to do anything for or with the band? Like, working a mixer or setting up mic's for the instruments correctly?" Patrick asked, leaning in closer to the table.

"No, surprisingly he hasn't, actually. Why?"

"Well, since we're getting into recording our songs, I figure we could need someone that knows how to do that sort of stuff, but Pete is the one that usually organizes that sort of stuff. I don't know why he hasn't asked you yet." Patrick explains.

"I'd love to work with stuff like that again. I might have to ask Pete about that."

Maybe Pete was right. Maybe this is exactly what you needed and that he did know your "type". Getting out and talking to people other than Pete was actually nicer than you thought.

You realized then that you needed to be with other people and not be such a hermit, maybe that's why you were feeling so sad, the only person you had were your parents' occasional calls (or not so occasionally to be honest) and Pete.

"Yeah, you totally should. I feel it would honestly be pretty cool to get to work with you." Patrick says, leaning back into his seat and looking away.

"I will. It'd definitely be nice to work with you guys, too. Especially you, I feel." You say. That was probably the boldest thing you've ever said. You didn't actually think you'd said that until Patrick looked up at you with a shocked expression, yet still a still small smile on his face.

"Yeah, definitely."

This was getting more and more enjoyable by the minute. You never burned up like this before, but the dorkiness of him was making you flush more than you would've ever expected. He was like you in an odd way. Same interests, same way of how you both acted, you've never had anyone be almost the same as you. It was nice talking to him about things that you liked and that he knew about too.

Sure, Pete was somewhat dorky and knew what you were talking about sometimes, but it always would end quickly from his rather short attention span.

By now the two of your milkshakes have already melted long ago, half of them still left from all the talking you two did rather than drinking it.

You hear a ding from the door, thinking it was most likely just another customer. Patrick looked behind you and fixed his posture from the way he was hunched over the table so that he was now sitting up straight.

You look behind you to see what Patrick currently was.

"You guys have been here for like, 2 and a half hours now. I mean, I'm assuming it's going great and I hate to cut it not so short but I gotta get home." Pete says, scratching his head as he looked down at you and Patrick.

"It's been two hours!?" You shout at Pete, your voice barely above a whisper.

"Yup!" Pete says, popping the 'P'.

You run a hand through your hair and sigh. This felt way shorter than two hours, and to be honest you were really sad about it. You'd had a lot of fun talking to Patrick and getting to know him. He had this sort of charm to him that reeled you in even more, regardless if he might've been conscious of it or not.

You get up from the booth and clean up what very little mess you and Patrick left on the table, Patrick helping and doing the same.

You get your wallet from your back pocket to take some cash out for a tip.

"No, no. Don't worry about it, I'll get it." Patrick says, taking a 5 dollar bill out quickly and placing it on the table.

"No, you already paid for the milkshakes, please, Patrick, I'll leave the tip."

"Nope, it was my treat, don't worry."

"But, Patrick-"

"You know what, I'll leave the tip. Here, take your money back." Pete sighs, taking the bill from the table and shoving it into Patrick's hands, then leaving one of his own on the table, clearly tired of you and Patrick going back and forth about the tip.

"Thanks, Pete." Patrick says, scratching the back of his neck.

"Hand me the Keys, I'll start the car while you flirt with each other." Pete says, snickering.

You take your keys from your pocket and hand them to him, your face rapidly heating up from his comment.

"Fuck you, Pete." You say, glaring at him.

"Uh-huh, yeah, whatever." Pete says, giving you a grin before walking out the door of the diner.

"You and him are complete opposites, how'd you two get to know each other?" Patrick laughs lightly, pushing up his glasses.

"Me and him were neighbors. I never really had any friends so Pete was the one person I ever hung out with. When he moved out of his parents' house I was still living with my parents, so we didn't see each other all that often, but we still called each other and hung out sometimes. He's always just kinda been there for me since I was a kid."

"You two have known each other that long already? I've only known him for a year now. He's a character for sure, though."

"Oh yeah, 100%." You laugh.

"I um, I had a lot of fun today. When do you think I can see you again? Or if you want to of course, you don't have to if you don't want to and I totally get it if not." Patrick says, rambling towards the end.

"I would love to see you again, Patrick. I had a lot of fun talking to you, too." You smile.

"Cool, cool, yeah. Can I get your number? To text you when or where, y'know?" Patrick awkwardly says.

"Yeah, of course! I'll put it into your phone." You say, putting your number into his phone and giving it back to him.

"Thanks. So, I'll see you sometime soon?"

"Yup, just call or text me and set up something, I won't be doing anything on weekends so thats probably the best time for anything, or whatever." You ramble.

"I'll do that. Thank you, Y/n. So uh, bye for now?" Patrick says with a crooked smile on his face.

You have no idea where you'd gotten the courage to do so, or what was even going through your head when you gave into the urge.

"Bye, Patrick." You say quietly after leaving a small peck on Patrick's cheek.

You quickly walk out of the diner to your car, now realizing what had just happened.

"Wow, what happened? Did I just see that?" Pete says, a smirk plastered on his face.

You slam your head onto your steering wheel and grip it tightly, staying there for a while before covering your face with your hands at an attempt to cool down your burning cheeks that were only getting hotter and hotter.

"Oh my god, why did I do that? How did I do that?!" You say to yourself, your voice muffled from your hands covering your face.

"Hey, first base already, huh? Maybe you'll make it to third quicker than I thought." Pete teases, nudging your shoulder.

You uncover your face and punch Pete in the arm, earning a whine and hiss from him.

"Fuck you, Pete."

You pull your car out of the parking lot, but catch a glance of Patrick. He was holding the side of his cheek with his mouth agape, watching as you drove out.

You did that. You're the reason he has that reaction. Holy shit.

Pete turns the radio down and rolls his window that was previously down back up.

"Told you that you would like him. Do you admit I was right, now?"

"What?" You say, turning your head to look at Pete for a couple of seconds then going back to the road.

"Y'know, the whole thing about me knowing your type and exactly what you needed. Admit I'm right." Pete persists.

"What? No way, man!"

"Hmm, okay, then. Patrick and Y/n, sitting in a tree, K-I-" Pete starts to sing.

"I'll throw you out of this fucking car and make you walk, Pete, I swear I'll do it If you don't stop." You say sternly.

"I'll stop *only* if you admit I'm right!"

Pete was stubborn, and he knew you wouldn't throw him out. Trying to ignore him would prove to be useless, too, unfortunately you'd have to admit it even if you didn't want to. Because he'd never stop.

"Fine! Fine! You were right about everything! Will you shut up now?" You say, throwing up one of your hands from the steering wheel.

Pete lays back into the seat and smiles proudly, staying silent for the rest of the ride back to your apartment.

You park and sigh as you get out of the car, locking it after Pete exited.

"Well, I've gotta go now so I could go get shit for me to eat. Thank me for this later, man." Pete says, walking off to his car parked not to far from yours.

"Bye, Pete."

"God, why did I do that?" You say, throwing yourself onto your bed.

You lay there, the same thing replaying over and over again in your head. You'd be honest, you were kind of proud of yourself for actually being able to do that. You have no clue where the bravery and boldness of that action came from.

After a little while, your phone dings, indicating you had a message from someone, most likely Pete to continue to tease you.

You pick it up, only to see it was from an unknown number.

-Hey, Y/n. It's Patrick!-

You immediately get up and look at the text message closely, a smile forming on your face.

You save his phone number into your phone as a contact and quickly type out a reply.

-Hey, Patrick! What's up?-

You had the same smile plastered on your face until you remembered the kiss you gave him on his cheek before you left the diner.

Oh shit. What if he's texting me to say something about it? What if I fucked up? Oh my god.

-Nothing right now.-

Three dots appeared on the bottom left corner of the screen. Appearing, then disappearing a few times before another text was sent.

-Hey, about that kiss before you left..-

You cringe, thinking of the worst possible outcomes and messages after that text was sent.

You bite your lip out of nervousness as you type out a response.

-Sorry. I just kind of did it without thinking. Sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I totally understand if you're like, weirded out or something.-

-No! That's why I wanted to text you, I didn't want you to feel like it bothered me. I didn't really mind it. Like, at all.-

You look at the message and let out a sigh of relief. Calmer about the fact that he wasn't bothered by it.

-Oh okay. Cool, cool. You dont know how relieved i am to hear that '•○•-

-I was already thinking.. Maybe if you're free next Saturday, we could go downtown and just walk around and eat somewhere for lunch?-

The smile that appeared on your face was so big it started to make your jaw hurt.

-That sounds great, I would love to!-

-Awesome! I'll talk to you later, though, I have to go to sleep now so I can get up early to practice with Pete and the other guys. He'll probably give me another "motherly" lecture if I'm late and tired again.-

You laugh to yourself as you read the text. Pete has given you more than enough of those motherly like lectures Patrick just texted about, so you weren't even surprised.

-Goodnight, Y/n. I'll talk to you tomorrow?-

The three dots showed again for a brief few seconds before one final text from Patrick sent.

-Please do. Goodnight, Patrick<3-

-<3-

Your heart skipped a beat and your cheeks began to burn up even more, impossibily more.

Pete's antics of getting you out never worked and you were never fond of, but this time you're glad he forced you to this one.

Volume: ■■■■■□□□

This one took me like, a week to finish? Maybe one of the few I've ever finished this quickly. This was very very cheesy but it was really fun to write, and it's a Patrick fic, so it gets an exception. Hope you enjoyed it! I'm currently working on two other Patrick fics as you're reading this, too!

[pbandjesse]

I am just having the worst headaches today. Like in my temples and I feel nauseous. It is not ideal. I had a very busy day and I don't have time for that.

Some of the problem is just that I did not get enough sleep I'm sure. But I woke up at 6:00 and was not thrilled that it was absolutely pouring outside. I got dressed and hugged James and I left to go pick up Blanche. And I could not figure out where her house was. The GPS was like she lives in these trees. And that is not true. So I had to call her and it was a whole thing so we were already running a few minutes late despite the traffic and the rain and me leaving early. But I got her and then we headed to camp.

When we got to camp found out that they were pushing the programs back so we did not need to be there at 7:15 and I was not thrilled. And then no one could tell me exactly what we were doing so I sat up at the arts building for a bit trying to eat my breakfast but I already felt very nauseous and not good. And then I moved down to the lodge when it was closer to the time that had originally been set for meeting there. I did stop because I found a new jelly mushroom I had never seen before and that was exciting. And I was just trying to put on a happy face but I was not my best.

It was decided that they would spend the first hour doing some group games so Elizabeth let me tap out and go lay down in my car for half an hour and I'm really glad you did because I think it's the only reason I made it through the 3 hours of programming I had. And the kids were great. I had a ton of fun doing my program with them but I just didn't feel good today.

Thankfully mostly during the programs I was fine. I would mostly be on my feet in a few times I would sit and just have the kids come to me with their questions which both situations work perfectly fine and I didn't find that one was easier than the other. And the rain would calm down so while it was still very wet it wasn't as miserable.

And everyone made bracelets and it was great. I only had a few kids that just were not respecting the materials and I didn't really have to deal with too much nonsense behavior. Mainly people really liked it and I even had a few people ask if they could take extras cuz they wanted to keep making stuff and I love that so of course I said yes.

And at the end of the third program I had them help me carry the chairs inside so I could bring the tables in as well because Joe would like to take the tent down soon. And so I got that finished and as I was walking down to the office Elizabeth called me and asked if I could please stay till 2:00. I had told her that I could stay till 2:00 but ideally I was leaving at 1:00 because I have to work at the museum tonight. And at this point I thought I was working at a museum at 4:30 but it ended up being 5:30. And I felt very bad already and I didn't really want to push myself and then have a miserable rest of the day. And I honestly at this point don't know what I would have done because I feel really really bad and I was able to sleep for 2 hours this afternoon.

So I had to hold that boundary and tell her I had to go. And she said well we're not going to be able to start cleaning until 1:00 anyway and it was about 12:00 at this point so she just told me I could leave. And I felt like I was kind of being a burden and everyone keeps telling me like we get it you don't feel good You're pregnant You're growing a person it's so hard. Take time for yourself be late on yourself but then when I try to hold those boundaries people are annoyed with me. And I don't like that. I like get it that people don't want to be inconvenienced but I am pushing myself very hard already.

And of course the traffic was absolutely horrible coming home. So even though I left at like 12:15 I didn't get home until 1:15. And I was on the verge of tears I felt so sick. My stomach hurt really bad my head hurt really bad. I thought I was going to throw up. I never did but it was close thing for basically the rest of the day. And I would get changed and lay down but I fell asleep very quickly honestly.

Sweetp would lay with me and he was being very cute today. And I slept until 3:30 and at first I was like oh that helped a lot I feel a lot better and for a moment maybe it did but then I was so close to throwing up it was awful. But I was determined to go to the museum and work this event and I was really looking forward to it so I had some pizza because I thought eating might help and I drank water and I laid on the couch and I just tried my best to feel okay but I did not feel okay.

James would come home as I was finishing getting dressed and sat with me upstairs for a bit. They kept telling me that I could come home early I could leave I didn't have to go if I didn't want to but I was very stubborn. I ended up laying on the floor for a few minutes and left right after 5:00.

The traffic was bad in the city as well so it was difficult getting to the museum and I was about 5 minutes late. But it was fine. The event didn't start till 6:30 anyway. And I got there and checked in and then got to work making my chase for the evening and I love how it turned out. The font looked awesome and the picture I found I had never used before so that was exciting I just really felt like it screamed print shopping industry and I would make a whole bunch of them to give out tonight. We had about 90 tickets sold so I wasn't expecting a ton of people to come back but I did get a good amount throughout the night.

Start we we're all at our different stations we had the cannery running and assembly line and balls and track and scavenger hunts and just a whole bunch of things happening and I didn't realize they were so many things happening. I hope that next time we do it we get more sales and more people in because it was so fun. And like I said I didn't get a ton of people coming back into the galleries but the 15 to 25 that did were so enthusiastic and I love talking to them and showing them the prince and it was just a really wonderful night. My head hurt a lot and I was not feeling amazing and that was a struggle. I was sipping water as best I could but I was just not feeling my best. But I still tried to put on a brave face and put on as much energy as I could for the guests that were there and I got great feedback and people saying they loved how enthusiastic I was and that's important to me.

At the end of the night I decided to spend my last half hour that I did not need for cleaning because I had finished that already organizing the tray of the one font that I like. I have been really bad about actually putting it away when I'm done with it and just kind of throwing them in a pile. So I actually appetized it and that was very satisfying It took about 20 minutes. So once I was done that I said goodbye to Jesse and I grabbed my stuff and now I'm driving home. And I am trying very hard not to throw up. I don't know if it's motion sickness that's getting me or what but man this is rough.

I'll be home in a couple minutes and I'm just going to take a shower and lay down and not actually throw up and just go to sleep. I really want to feel better tomorrow because I'm leaving for the beach to hang out with Jess and it's going to be such a nice weekend and I cannot be sick the whole time.

So send me some good thoughts. I hope that you're all having a really lovely evening. I love you all Good night.

[mrbexwrites]

Sibling Q&A Tag

Tagged by @spideronthesun here- thank you <3 Leaving an open tag for anyone else who'd like to do this, as my brain is not working at the moment 😅 I was going to answer this for my Memento Mori siblings, but the questions fit Mavis & Connor best!

1. Who looks the most like Dad?

Connor: Mavis. Mavis: We're twins. I feel like we both have a lot of his features. Unfortunately. Connor: You more than me, though. You have his frown, and you wear it all the time. Mavis:...

2. Who looks the most like mom?

Both: Colleen. Connor: She definitely takes after Mum. She got her eyes, which definitely helps.

3. Who eats the most?

Mavis: Connor. You've put some weight on, recently. Maybe time t cut down. You've got a wedding suit to squeeze into. Connor: Don't fat-shame me! I've been stress eating, and Hadley says my having a tummy means that there's more for me to love!

4. Who has been in the weirdest situations?

Connor: Mavis. 100% Mavis. I mean...you've met her right? She's pretty effed-up.

5. Who sleeps the most?

Mavis: Connor. He lies in bed well past sunrise most days. Connor: Some of us just sleep a normal eight hour night, and can't survive on whatever sleep they can snatch. Mave, getting less than four hours of sleep per night isn't healthy!

6. Most stable romantic life?

Both in unison: Connor.

7. Worst habit of each one?

Connor: Mavis has a lot of unaddressed anger issues. She's going to need a lot of therapy. She likes to horde tins of food, but I think that's a trauma response. She doesn't use her words to tell us how she's feeling, she'll just sulk and lash out, expecting us to know what's wrong with her. She's pretty grumpy most of the time. But she does like to keep thins neat and tidy....a little too neat and tidy. Like 'everything has a place' tidy. So, yeah... Mavis: ... Mavis: Connor chews with his mouth open.

8. Who's the most dramatic?

Connor: Mavis Mavis: Connor. Connor: Wait...! What?! How am I the most dramatic? Mavis: You cried when you got punched in the face. Connor: That's not being dramatic! That's being in pain! You're the dramatic one! You blew up an art gallery just because Arnauld was in it! Mavis: That's not dramatic. That's being thorough. Connor:...

9. Who had a weird phase?

Mavis: Connor. He went through his emo phase. With a stupid fringe and lip piercing. The long chain hanging from his jeans. The poetry! Connor: It was a phase! yes, it was super cringe, but who wasn't a total little weirdo when they were 13 years old?

10. Best cook of the family?

Connor: Mum. 100% Mum. She bakes her own bread, makes her own yoghurt. She can take anything and turn it into a banquet. Honestly, you should come round. She'll never see someone go away hungry.

11. Best memory together?

Mavis: That day we went fishing in the river, and you caught a fish. I helped you reel it in. Connor: We were five or six. That's your favourite memory of us? Mavis: *shrugs*

12. Worst memory together?

Connor: There was this one time when Mavis kidnapped me, and took me to our father. He tortured me. That wasn't great.

13. Dream trip together

Connor: Pretty much anywhere. We've been apart for most of our childhood. Maybe a camping trip so that we can have proper time spent in nature, bonding, reminiscing... Mavis: I'd rather go to Hell than go on a holiday with you.

14. Would you rather not be able to shower for a month or have the same clothes for a month?

Connor: Shower. I'd hate not being able to shower. I want to be cleeean! I could always air out my clothes, or spray them with deoderant to try to mask the smell. But I want me to be clean and fresh. Mavis: I not fussed. Done both, if I'm honest. No-one complained. Connor: It's a good thing that smell isn't something that can travel over our psychic link...!

15. Who's the older one?

Connor: Mavis. But only by a couple of minutes.

16. Role model?

Connor: Arnauld. He's so cool, and has shaped me into the man I am today. Followed closely by Gary. Mavis: Father.

17. Who usually has the worst ideas?

Mavis: Connor. He's an idiot. Connor: Says the person who blew up an art gallery !!

18. A GIANT insect is on the wall, who's taking care of it?

Both: Mavis. Connor: I'm squemish. Mavis will get it. Mavis: He usually begs for me to just trap it and throw it outside. It's easier to kill it, but he usually asks nicely, and I'm trying to be a better person, so I'll just scoop it into my hand, and throw it out a window.

[autumnbell32]

I've had bad depressive episodes- more than I count- since I was 12. The hypomanic episodes- I don't know how long I've had them. Sometimes, since my baseline is usually sadness and anxiety peppered with neutrality, it is hard for me to tell the difference between feeling happy and hypomania- Am I just feeling good? Am I scrambling to get everything done before the next depression hits or is this maniacal energy? The past few days...there has been NO question that I'm hypomanic, perhaps even experiencing full blown mania.

These are the worst symptoms I have ever had. I've heard things before...during a bad depressive episode and during times when I am overstimulated or sleep-deprived. They've always caught me by surprise- I hear them internally, of course, but imagine being completely alone and hearing a voice that isn't coming out of your own mouth or your phone. I've always paused after it happens, at least momentarily. Before this week, they had been nonsensical words and phrases that weren't contextual. Today, though. I woke up after few hours of sleep and immediately I was in eye-bulging, hand-trembling, panic city.

I couldn't stay in bed anymore. I got up, pulled my hair back, and went and got my usual iced coffee. LIKE AN IDIOT. Sure, lets add caffeine to this mix of heart palpitations and paranoia. Dum-dum. By the time I got back home I was sitting in my car, hearing a voice telling me I was "loveless." "It's just a voice...a biochemical issue...a brain glitch from new meds and genetics and lack of sleep." Yeah, I started bawling anyways. Loveless? Add into the fact that I have zero confidence right now and feel the most unmarketable I have ever felt and feel super attracted to someone I am talking to who, I'm pretty sure, thinks I'm a soft 4 (if that). And then someone on the Youtube replied to a non-inflammatory comment I made about Pete Davidson's fine self with insults of me being ugly and fat. I stared at the vegetarian breakfast sandwhich I had in the seat next too me, felt nauseated and it was waterworks. Fuck, I'm just trying my best. The psych meds have put weight on me.

I called my mom, asked her if I seem hypomanic. "Nope you seem happy." I called my brother, with his steady, calculated tone and told him my symptoms and told him I was scared. I mean, they aren't equipped to deal with this but I don't talk to many people. OH and I messaged the person I am talking to, who also deals with similar issues, and had a meltdown. I mean, things are great 👍. I went inside, called a nurse line and messaged my therapist, both advised ER. I can't. I can't miss any work. I'll go to this 6 hour short shift and drive myself to ER afterwards if I still feel like my brain is rolling out of my skull and down into a ditch. I have the next two days off. I called my insurance's helpline that is staffed with LCSWs, telling her I can't miss work, and we came up with a plan. Which I have written down on a notecard to keep in my pocket today. Listen, my aunt was late onset schizophrenic and her daughter was as well, I'm not going to pretend like I'm not scared. But all I can do is try to support myself and handle it. And not panic.

I had plans to go to a haunted house/Halloween theme park tonight as well. I love love love horror, but I'm guessing that could be triggering for me right now so I canceled. I feel so badly, he got tickets. But I have to coddle this organ under my skullcap right now. It's the only one I have.

I feel like I'm going to vomit.

[blubushie]

hiii u know who this is ;3 i have abad questions!!!

do u feel older or younger than u are?

whats ur favorite thing about urself?

if u could tell ur younger self anything what would it be?

would u rather float alone in space or float alone at sea?

what if aliens invaded the planet and they were hot

what bug have u eaten the most of (by accident?)

whats ur most justified paranoia?

if u had a year to live what would u do with it?

whats something u hate?

what keeps u up at night? (besides the obvious)

what do u do early in the morning when u should be sleeping?

whats the worst pain uve ever felt?

how high is ur pain tolerance?

whats the worst movie uve ever seen?

whats ur favorite piece of clothing?

whats an unpopular opinion u have?

whats ur earliest memory?

do u sing when ur alone?

we know uve taken them, but have u ever saved someones life?

what tattoos do u have?

Heh I do know who this is!! I've missed your lists :]

Do you feel older or younger than you are?

Probably younger. I'm 23 but more immature than my father and siblings were at my age. But I prefer calling it a "zest for life." ;]

2. What's your favourite thing about yourself?

Steady hands.

3. If you could tell your younger self anything, what would it be?

Not everyone is trustworthy. Trust your gut.

4. Would you rather float alone in space or alone at sea?

Alone at sea. Waves are calming and help me sleep. Some of the best sleep I've ever had has been at sea.

5. What if aliens invaded the planet (and they were hot)?

I'd clap some alien cheeks, obviously.

6. What bug have you eaten the most of (by accident)?

Flies.

7. What's your most justified paranoia?

Everyone's out to kill, hurt me, or take advantage of me.

8. If you had a year to live, what would you do with it?

Return to Australia and immediately go bush so the government can't find me. Let me die out there where I belong.

9. What's something you hate?

Dumb teenagers who speed and/or tailgate. Also people who overtake and don't use their fucking indicators. But especially teenagers who speed and those that think speeding is cool/skite about speeding. Yeah, yeah, it's fun to go fast, do it when there aren't other fucking cars on the road so if you crash at least you only kill yourself instead of both of us. I've got places to be and I'd like to get there with my anatomy intact, cheers.

10. What keeps you up at night?

Memories of that time I was kidnapped and interrogated heavily for sixteen hours.

Also groceries. "You gotta to the shops tomorrow and get milk, and stop at the servo and get petrol, and-"

11. What do you do early in the morning when you should be sleeping?

Sleeping. I actually have a pretty healthy sleep schedule. I'm 23, my arse cannot pull all-nighters like it used to.

But if I'm not sleeping, I'm writing. Or lying in bed and trying to sleep.

12. What's the worst pain you've ever felt?

Toss-up between scarification for indigenous initiation ceremony and being partially disembowelled by an angry pig. The scarification was slower so the pain lasted longer and was worse mentally because I knew it was coming the whole time so had more than enough time to scare the shit out of myself, but I'd argue the Pig Incident was actually worse on the overall level of pain. Feeling something sharp moving inside your body is a special kind of weird.

13. How high is your pain tolerance?

Tolerance? High. I feel pain easy but I'm good at fighting through it and not letting it get the better of me.

14. What's the worst movie you've ever seen?

Pan Man. It's fucking hilarious. Terrible plot-wise and budget wise, but perfect in its hilarity and execution. It's my favourite "so bad it's good" movie.

15. What's your favourite piece of clothing?

Necklace.

16. What's an unpopular opinion you have?

Beer tastes better as tinnies over bottled. So does fizz. I don't know why but the carbonation holds better and it tastes more... crisp? It's just better.

17. What's your earliest memory?

Lying in a hospital bed when I was three, staring up at the lights in the room, because a plastic surgeon just sutured my left eyebrow back together after I fell face-first into the coffee table and busted it open. My mum was at work and my dad was supposed to be watching me, but he was on the phone and I was jumping about on the couch. She still hasn't forgiven him. The scar's not even noticeable unless you're close enough to see the lines of the stroma of my irises. So unfortunately I don't have a "cool" eye scar like the blokes do in the movies.

18. Do you sing when you're alone?

If I know the song and it's in my range and I'm in a good enough mood, yes.

19. Have you ever saved someone's life?

Yes.

20. What tattoos do you have?

I have a dingo tattooed on the inside of my left wrist. Sometime soon, maybe around the start of next month, I'm looking to get Kaz tattooed on my outer forearm from elbow to wrist.

[carrickbender]

7

1. I'm sitting here drinking coffee, but I should be doing chores. It's a nice day, bug wants to do stuff later, there's email to catch up on... so yeah, do weeks really end?

2. Friday night was fantastic: got off work, listened to my mothers epic complaining while I took the flat tire off of her old suv, lost my phone, took it to town to be fixed only to find my phone on the bumper(IT WENT 10 MILES ON THE BUMPER AT 65+ MPH TO TOWN!!!!! PRAISE ALL THE GODS IT STAYED!!!!), got the tire fixed and back on the car in a very bad spot, went home, buggy got sick and I had to clean up his #2 mess<poor guy>, and I slept on the couch because sleeping is awful in a bed anymore. Great start, huh?

3. My current shame storm is making a hurricane look like a passing shower. No matter what I do, what I accomplish, how hard I try, it's just not enough. It's a stupid thing, and no matter how much I try to do the affirmations, they aren't working. #backtosquareone

4. I have a drs appointment tomorrow, and I'm dreading it. I've gained 5 lbs(or so my messed up scale says), but my pants fit better, so I dunno. Plus, there's the pain in other places thanks to fluid build up. Just another fun thing that's happened since I had bypass surgery. #insulttoinjury

5. I think after a certain age you should be able to trade certain things that still work on your body for things that would be more useful. For example, I'd gladly trade my still working sex drive for the ability to thrive on 3-4 hours a night of sleep. That way I could trade one useless thing for a useful thing. Pardon me for being slightly bitter. Im just over it. To be honest I wish I was working the 60-70 hour a week schedule and going to school like I was before. At least then I wouldn't think about it as much. #thanksihateit

6. My former employer is having a big meeting w/investors and politicians on the 25th, and theres rumours it might start back up. So im sending the HR manager my updated resume, and starting the conversation about a shift supervisor position. To be honest, I'd kill for it, and it would keep me on career trajectory. Fingers crossed.... I love my new job but I can't afford to work there.

7. I'm sorry to be such a negative person but I'm kinda reaching a hard spot in my journey. I have no real time to stop and process because if I did I think it would derail part of the rebuilding process for my life I started a few years ago. Part of that rebuilding process was prioritizing financial security, so even considering all the other stuff has to take a backseat... but how to do it when you're a novice at self care and are trying to reprogram your already f'ed up brain is another thing entirely. Bono wrote it best in the song Cedars of Lebanon: "The worst of us are a long drawn out confession; The best of us are geniuses of compression.You say you're not going to leave the truth alone.I'm here 'cause I don't want to go home".

Thanks for letting me vent. This week will be better... I think. Much love!

[pesterloglog]

Karkat Vantas, Meenah Peixes, Sollux Captor, Lob 4, Ter 2

Page 621-625

KARKAT: ALRIGHT, COMPANIES 1 THROUGH 3 ARE IN PLACE.

KARKAT: 4 THROUGH 6 ARE EN ROUTE.

KARKAT: ... DRONE FLEET IS FINALLY LOOKING READY TO DEPLOY, THANK FUCK.

MEENAH: hey karkat

KARKAT: INFOSEC MANAGED TO FEND OFF ANOTHER CROCKERCORP HACK BUT THEY PROBABLY GOT ACCESS TO SOME LIMITED INTEL, WE SHOULD KEEP THAT IN MIND.

MEENAH: karkat

KARKAT: SECURITY BACK AT THE COMPOUND IS GIVING THE ALL-CLEAR; DOESN'T LOOK LIKE JANE HAS DESIGNS ON HQ. SINGLE-MINDED AS ALWAYS.

MEENAH: KARKAT

KARKAT: WHAT.

MEENAH: krillax

KARKAT: NOT REALLY AN IDEAL TIME FOR THAT, ON ACCOUNT OF THE FACT THAT WE'RE PROBABLY HOURS AWAY FROM THE MOST CRITICAL ARMED ENGAGEMENT THE REBELLION IS LIKELY TO SEE.

MEENAH: it hasnt been an ideel time for like 6 sweeps

MEENAH: you need to take a breatht-stroke

KARKAT: ... HAHAHA, WHAT?

MEENAH: you know what i mean

MEENAH: youve been runnin yourshellf into the fuckin dirt for ages

MEENAH: take a you moment

KARKAT: MEENAH, THIS IS THE WORST POSSIBLE TIME TO TAKE A ME MOMENT.

MEENAH: actually in like a day or so were either gonna be tridentumphant and busy as fuck or dead in the water so its like the best possible time all fins considered

MEENAH: youve been out on field ops for like a week

MEENAH: maybe i wanna chat with my buoy toy for a lil bit

KARKAT: YEAH, ALRIGHT.

KARKAT: I DUNNO, FUCK. UH... HOW ARE YOU DOING?

MEENAH: how are *you* doin

KARKAT: PRETTY FUCKING STRESSED!

KARKAT: TRYING TO LINE UP THE DOWNFALL OF A NIGH-IMMORTAL TYRANT AND CAPITALIZE ON WHAT MIGHT BE THE ONE SHOT WE'VE GOT AT DEFINITIVELY STICKING IT TO HER WHILE SHE'S GREEDILY OVEREXTENDED, WRANGLE THE REST OF THOSE SIDELINING DO-NOTHING FUCKING IDIOTS INTO ACTION, AND PLAN FOR WHAT HAPPENS NEXT ON LIKE THREE HOURS OF SLEEP.

KARKAT: ALSO THIS COVERT-OPS SUIT IS TIGHT AS ALL FUCK.

MEENAH: well if its any consolation that may be rough for you but its a pretty great time to be your rear admire-all 38)

KARKAT: MUCH OBLIGED.

KARKAT: ...

KARKAT: SERIOUSLY, MEENAH, I APPRECIATE IT.

KARKAT: IT'S BEEN KIND OF A ROUGH...

KARKAT: DECADE AND A HALF?

KARKAT: BUT THROUGH ALL THE SLOG AND THE SHITTY TIMES AND THE UNCERTAINTY YOU'VE REMAINED REMARKABLY COMMITTED TO THIS.

KARKAT: HELPED ME TURN THIS ABSTRACT, FRUSTRATED DREAM INTO A FUNCTIONING FUCKING REALITY.

KARKAT: YOU NEVER WAVERED.

KARKAT: YOU NEVER FLAKED.

KARKAT: YOU STUCK BY ME.

MEENAH: not like dave huh

KARKAT: WOW, STRAIGHT TO THE POINT.

MEENAH: i mean hey i figured youd wanna glub about it

MEENAH: conchsiderin

KARKAT: SO YOU HEARD THE NEWS?

MEENAH: yeah i mighta been listenin in on your converseation myshellf

MEENAH: along with like half the comms team

MEENAH: you left your mic on

KARKAT: UN

KARKAT: FUCKING

KARKAT: BELIEVABLE.

MEENAH: its all good

MEENAH: actually pretty much everyone ate it up there was like gasps and cheers and occasional applause and shit

MEENAH: not shore if youre aware of this but it turns out people fuckin love you

KARKAT: WELL COLOR ME GLAD MY OPERATIVES FOUND IT INSPIRING THAT I TOOK CRITICAL TIME OUT OF MY MISSION TO PREVENT THE ENTIRE PLANET FROM BACKSLIDING INTO STAGNANT CONFECTIONARY FASCISM TO YELL AT A HAPLESS DIVORCEE.

KARKAT: ANYWAY.

KARKAT: YES.

KARKAT: NOT LIKE DAVE.

MEENAH: how you feelin about that

KARKAT: I DON'T KNOW.

KARKAT: I THINK MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE, JUST FUCKING...

KARKAT: DISAPPOINTED.

KARKAT: EXHAUSTINGLY, FRUITLESSLY DISAPPOINTED.

KARKAT: WE USED TO SPEND SO MUCH TIME TOGETHER TALKING ABOUT HOW TO FIX SHIT, YOU KNOW?

KARKAT: SPITBALLING ALL THIS FRIVOLOUS AND/OR GRAVELY SERIOUS CONJECTURE ABOUT WHAT TO FUCKING *DO* WITH OURSELVES AND THE WORLD.

KARKAT: AND THEN AS SOON AS IT STARTS REALLY MATTERING, AS SOON AS IT BECOMES CLEAR IT'S TIME TO DO *SOMETHING*, HE JUST WILTS.

KARKAT: THEN HE SPENDS YEARS MILLING FECKLESSLY AROUND IN THAT DOMESTIC TORTURE LABYRINTH OF A RELATIONSHIP

KARKAT: *MARRIES INTO IT*

KARKAT: AND SUBSEQUENTLY DECIDES THAT NOW'S THE BEST TIME TO PLAY SPIES, PRESUMABLY SO HE CAN CONTINUE TO AVOID HAVING MISERABLE MATRIMONIAL PROCREATIVE SEX.

KARKAT: ONLY FOR JADE TO FOLLOW HIM INTO THE CAUSE!

KARKAT: WHICH, YOU KNOW, WAS OBJECTIVELY A PRETTY BIG BOON TO THE REBELLION.

KARKAT: GOOD FOR MORALE, AND OBVIOUSLY THEY WERE INCREDIBLE FIELD AGENTS.

KARKAT: BUT FUCK WAS IT A SAVAGE PAIN IN THE CHUTE.

KARKAT: DO YOU REMEMBER THE PERIOD EARLY ON WHERE I HAD TO ASSIGN ANOTHER CLERK TO MISSION CONTROL WHOSE SOLE PURPOSE WAS TO MANAGE THE TWO OF THEM SO THEY KEPT THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY UNTIL THEY FIGURED OUT HOW TO BE EVEN THE SCANTEST APPROXIMATION OF NORMAL AROUND ME?

KARKAT: THE FACT THAT IT WAS NECESSARY AT ALL IS STILL FUCKING APPALLING.

KARKAT: AND THEN FINALLY, *FINALLY*, WE GET HIM SITUATED, HE'S ACTUALLY MANAGING TO CONTRIBUTE TO SOMETHING MEANINGFUL AGAIN FOR THE FIRST TIME IN WHO EVEN KNOWS HOW LONG.

KARKAT: AND HE JUST FUCKS OFF AND

KARKAT: AND DIES.

KARKAT: HE JUST CALLS IT THERE.

KARKAT: SO

KARKAT: DISAPPOINTED.

KARKAT: DISAPPOINTED IS HOW I'M FEELING ABOUT THAT.

KARKAT: BUT-

KARKAT: FUCKING- HOLD ON, I NEED TO TAKE THIS.

KARKAT: *WHAT*.

SOLLUX: finally he picks up.

SOLLUX: hey man.

KARKAT: DON'T FUCKING "HEY MAN" ME.

KARKAT: I'M KIND OF IN THE MIDDLE OF POURING MY PUSHER OUT HERE.

KARKAT: TO SAY NOTHING OF THE FACT THAT I'M ALSO WAGING A WAR FOR THE FATE OF OUR PLANET.

SOLLUX: yeah i can tell.

SOLLUX: there's like a bazillion m0oks swarming ar0und my crib and none 0f the grubereats dudes are accepting orders right n0w.

SOLLUX: probably 0n account 0f your inc0nvenient ass war.

SOLLUX: could y0u pick me something up?

SOLLUX: i'm assuming you're 0n your way.

KARKAT: YOU'RE SUCH A CHUTEHEAD, MAN.

KARKAT: JUST POSTED UP IN YOUR GAMER HOLE DOING WHO THE FUCK KNOWS WHAT WHILE THE REST OF US ARE OUT HERE GRINDING OUR GLOBES TRYING TO FIX SOMETHING.

KARKAT: MAYBE YOU'D GIVE MORE OF A FUCK ABOUT THE REPRODUCTIVE FUTURE OF OUR SPECIES IF ARADIA WAS EVER ACTUALLY THERE LONG ENOUGH FOR YOU TO GET SOME.

MEENAH: ohhh snapper

KARKAT: ANYWAY YEAH I CAN PROBABLY SWING THAT.

KARKAT: ...

KARKAT: ...

KARKAT: FUCKING HELLO?

SOLLUX: sorry i was gaming.

KARKAT: SHOCKER!

KARKAT: BETTER GET BACK TO IT, THEN, DON'T LET ME KEEP YOU.

KARKAT: I'LL JUST BE OUT HERE FREEDOM FIGHTING AND DEPLETING JANE'S GROUND FORCES SO SHE WON'T HAVE ENOUGH MANPOWER TO STORM THE METEOR AND PUT A SPOON THROUGH YOUR SPINE, OH AND ALSO FERRYING YOU YOUR FUCKING FAST FOOD, I GUESS!

KARKAT: GOOD LUCK!

KARKAT: HOPE YOU GET A HIGH SCORE!

SOLLUX: yeah im kinda in the z0ne right now.

KARKAT: AWESOME.

SOLLUX: hey kk

KARKAT: WHAT.

SOLLUX: are we still friends?

KARKAT: OBVIOUSLY, DIPSHIT!

KARKAT: STAY SAFE, ALRIGHT?

KARKAT: ...

KARKAT: ...

KARKAT: DUDE!

SOLLUX: s0rry im still gaming.

KARKAT: BYE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SOLLUX: alrighty bro g0od talk.

KARKAT: SORRY ABOUT THAT.

KARKAT: AS I WAS SAYING.

KARKAT: YEAH, I'M DISAPPOINTED ABOUT HOW EVERYTHING WITH DAVE WENT DOWN.

KARKAT: BUT TODAY NEEDS TO BE BIGGER THAN THAT.

KARKAT: IT'S NOT PRODUCTIVE FOR ME TO SIT HERE AND WALLOW ABOUT WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN AND WHAT MORE I COULD HAVE DONE FOR ONE PERSON WHEN NOW, MORE THAN EVER, I NEED TO FOCUS ON WHAT COULD BE AND WHO'S WITH ME NOW.

KARKAT: WHO I'M DOING ALL OF THIS FOR.

KARKAT: WE'VE BUILT SOMETHING AMAZING TOGETHER, AND IF WE CAN HOLD ON JUST A LITTLE BIT LONGER IT'LL HAVE BEEN INCALCULABLY WORTH EVERY OUNCE OF STRUGGLE.

KARKAT: LET'S MAKE IT THROUGH TODAY.

KARKAT: WE MAKE IT THROUGH TODAY, AND WE TAKE TOMORROW INTO OUR OWN HANDS.

KARKAT: AND WE NEVER LET IT GO.

LOB 4: Well said, sir!

KARKAT: WHAT THE FUCK.

KARKAT: HOW LONG HAVE YOU ALL BEEN LISTENING?

TER 2: Pretty much since the beginning, sir!

MEENAH: lmao

KARKAT: OKAY.

KARKAT: THEN I HOPE YOU'RE ALL FEELING SUFFICIENTLY FUCKING MOTIVATED, BECAUSE IT'S A LONG WAY TO GO UNTIL TOMORROW!

KARKAT: COMMANDERS HARLEY, MARYAM, AND LALONDE ARE INBOUND, AND NOT LONG AFTER THEY GET HERE THINGS ARE GOING TO GET BATSHIT STUPID!

KARKAT: BUT THINGS HAVE BEEN BATSHIT STUPID FOR A LONG, LONG FUCKING TIME,

KARKAT: SO LET'S DRAG THAT IMPERIOUS CORPORATE BITCH DOWN FROM HER AIRSHIP AND REINTRODUCE A LITTLE NORMALCY!

LOBsTERs: SIR, YES SIR!

KARKAT: MEENAH! ANYTHING TO ADD?

MEENAH: lets get this bread

LOBsTERs: MA'AM, YES MA'AM!

MEENAH: alrighty maggots you heard the boss

MEENAH: target fuckin acquired

[blep-pup]

As a havanese owner, what would you say their energy levels are like, along with how long it takes to groom them? are they trainable? I'm thinking about getting one in the future

hey there! great questions! this is a long post cuz I love info-dumping about animals, ESPECIALLY my little boy so I'm putting a cut

Energy: dogs energy levels is something I was quite concerned with too since I'm a fairly low energy person and I cannot reliably keep a high energy dog satisfied. If you sniff around the internet you'll find multiple sources saying that a healthy, standard havanese only really needs about 40 minutes of exercise per day. If this isn't met, they'll likely get mischievous around your house inviting you to play with them because they're (not consciously) trying to get that energy out. Now they're also a pretty sturdy breed in that if you have an active lifestyle they can adapt to that pretty well, just don't expect them to be husky levels of par on par with you

Puppies are of course a little different. All young dogs will have higher energy needs than adults do, and depending on the age, will also have different tolerances to amounts and sometimes will crash and just sleep.

They should chill out, comparatively speaking, as they age, but havaneses are known for remaining playful and mischievous throughout their lives. I've met multiple havanese and havanese mix owners who tell me about their dogs' "teasing"

I got Milou when he was 11 weeks old and he was pretty bouncing off the walls energetic, but he'd reliably crash for 1-2 hours of sleep with just 30-60 minutes of play. I couldn't really walk him for more than 30 minutes at a time though, with our average walks at that age being about 20-30 minutes and he'd walk twice a day. When he reached the 4-6 month mark, he could play for like 60-90 minutes before getting tired and even then he'd still try milking a little more out of me. Now he's over a year and he asks to play less and play sessions last less, but he's still a spunky little boy who will steal shoes to provoke me into chasing him. Milou is a good walker though, so 80% of my energy sink with him is walking him. If you're down to play with your pup that works too

Grooming: I'm going to answer this question from a groomer's perspective because that's what I do professionally. Havaneses are what you call a hypo-allergenic breed (at the very least, their fur should not cause allergies, or not strong allergic reactions, but technically there is no such thing as a truly hypo-allergenic dog) so they have the type of fur that just grows and never stops. They don't shed which is very nice, but they are constantly growing, and havanese fur grows fast. They are 100% a breed that requires frequent grooming

how long does it take to groom them? well, this depends on the dog, on average a small breed like the havanese takes me 1-2 hours, but there are a lot of factors in this including how well trained to tolerate grooming your pup is. There are some breeds that on average are amazing at being groomed, for some reason (90% of the schnauzers I do are the best doggos) and there are some breeds that on average are terrible at being groomed (90% of the wheaten terriers I do HATE being groomed). Havaneses don't lean one way or another, it boils down to personality and training. One of my best clients is a havanese. One of my worst clients is also a havanese. Milou is pretty good, but I still need to work with him on his front paws. If you get a havanese puppy, you have to get them used to being handled and moved around for grooming if you want them to be cooperative, which leads to a faster groom. You can do this by offering treats when doing handling training sessions with your pup. Milou went from HATING his face being touched, to letting me grab his nose, move it around and even lets me scrap tarter off of his teeth, but this took work.

The other factor is whether or not you keep your havanese fur long or short or inbetween. I personally like to keep Milou's comfort in mind. In the winter, I keep his coat at 16mm, all the pictures of him fluffy are during that time. In the summer I gave him a summercut, aka 1/4 inch. If you keep your havanese fur long, you WILL HAVE TO BRUSH IT. Havanese fur is very thin and matts easily, especially if they are active. Milou's legs matt a lot in the winter because he loves playing in the snow. If you can brush every day, that's ideal. If you can just brush multiple times a week, that's okay too. If you only brush when you're doing a full groom, your dog is going to be matted and it is not only going to take longer but will even make the grooming painful for them which will make them hate grooming.

Trainability: This is going to be a little confusing so bear with me alright?

I had a beagle before I had Milou. Beagles are food motivated. They are a stubborn breed who will follow their nose, but if you have food ohhohho they will do whatever you want whenever you want. Lili was an extremely well trained beagle because of this

Havanese are... not known for being food motivated. you might find some individuals who are, but on average, remember that they're a toy breed, toy breeds are annoying about eating food. And here's the other kinda weird thing alright. Havanese are first and foremost a companion breed. They just want to make you happy. But they also have a stubborn streak in them. If they don't feel like doing something, they're not going to do it

Milou (keep in mind this isn't just abysmally rare for dogs in general but especially for a toy breed who are notoriously difficult to potty train) nailed his potty training day 1 of bringing him home. He bent down to pee, I picked him up, put him on the pee pad, and threw him a praise and petting party when he finished. Ever since that day he would make an effort to exclusively pee on the potty pad. Nowadays, he prefers to pee outside whenever possible but we still have accidents on rugs and carpets here and there if we haven't taken him out to potty enough. So you'd think he'd be easy to train right?

there were so many days where he would do the trick for me like three times, and then just decide he was done with training and would rather do something else. You really have to get to know your dog and what motivates them. Milou will do tricks all day if there's good enough praise and the treats are high value (aka lunchmeats like ham and turkey, gourmet little stinker). But all in all, with enough patience, consistency, communication and kindness, you can have a well trained and well behaved havanese. Milou is a good little boy who is very well trained

As will all dogs, havaneses respond well to positive feedback, and honestly, there is no easy or quick way to train a dog. It takes time and work. There are things you will work on, that you won't feel the benefits of until MONTHS later. Also, keep in mind that a dog who feels safe and secure with their owner (barring personality) should grow up to feel confident about the world around them. I put a lot of work into Milou and making sure he was exposed to new things as a puppy and having those experiences be good ones so that now that he's over a year, he's not scared of trying new things or meeting new dogs

In conclusion: Havaneses are like any other dog, they take time and work, they need to be exercised and groomed, but they are amazing companions. They just love you and they want to be with you! Multiple people I've met who've owned havaneses tend to report "best dog I've ever had". Milou is only my second, but honestly, I'm inclined to agree. He's fantastic. Always keep in mind your pup's breed and breed needs when getting one such as needing grooming, and also put in training to make sure your pup doesn't develop separation anxiety as is common in toy breeds and especially havaneses who are bred to love you to the moon and back. I wish you luck with your future best friend!

OH ALMOST FORGOT for a toy breed there's actually a lot of size variation in havaneses, so either go for a breeder who has parents with the sizes you're looking for, or... don't be picky. The smallest havanese at my work is 7lbs, Milou is average size at 13lbs and I've seen a havanese that's 25lbs, bigger than my beagle. While I personally love tiny dogs, it was purely a coincidence that the breeder I got Milou from had tiny parents and even then Milou turned out a little under twice their size XD point is, be aware that there's a lot of different sizes they come in, and there's not really a standard color for them either. They literally come in all colors except brindle. I personally think this is fun

[tactlesstuesdays]

ranking my chiles fics because i can and there's only 13 on ao3:

13. if my wishes came true it would've been you - mainly a bomika fic but the chiles was cute imo

12. lakeside lovers - same as above

11. crush at first sight - i usually can't re read my own fics without squirming but i can't even touch this one, i really wanted to make this into a proper fic but i just couldn't 🤷‍♀️

10. crestfallen on the landing - it's champagne problems so it gets off lightly

9. the city of love - i wrote it within two and a half hours and stayed up till 2 with it, i was very sleep deprived in school that day so negative points. overall it's alright

8. old musings - i liked the concept at the time but now i don't think i executed it v well

7. our empire of stars - i like it, not my best and not my worst. im still sad i couldn't finish it especially because ive still got the plan for it on my phone somewhere

6. sleepovers change everything - the title would put me off as a reader but it was my first chiles fic so i have an attachment to it. (i love this fic sm <333, it just isn't my fav)

5. shut up and dance with me - chiles dancing is my fav thing, it's slightly recurring in my chiles fics icl

4. your beauty never ever scared me - i think this could be canon, chapa would be so worried if she ever hurt miles even by accident

3. fake it with me - FAKE DATING CHILES, i think this is one of my only chiles fics they don't kiss in and i love it sm, jealous miles serves sorry not sorry

2. you belong with me - it's so simple but i love it, jealous chapa is always a win, argue with a wall or something

1. my mind forgets to remind me, you're a bad idea - i love this fic for many reasons but number one has to be the name. it's sparks fly which makes sense because of chapa's electricity and bose in chapa's crush 'sparks will literally fly!' and it's a secret relationship and i still need to write a part 2 for this