#so he like cannot and will not ever be older than 17 ever

[nana-mizu-shiki]

D.C PROMPT-

Birthday Training

It was a calm night- when it all became clear, and the pieces of a puzzle they didn't know were missing fit into place.

It's been about a year since Bruce had been returned from being "dead" (Thanks Timmy); Dick was training with Dami, Jay just got back from patrol, Alfred was making cookies upstairs, and Babs was going over some old footage at the Batcomputer. (It was family dinner last night so she decided to stay for a while, it's only once a month they're all gathered at the manor at the same time after all.)

Dick was just standing after pinning Baby Bat when she spoke, Jason walking in from the showers to the open area.

"This... isn't right. Where'd all the records go?"

Dick paused to look over at her as he lifted Dami up. It may have just been a whisper, a mumble, but in a room full of Bats in the cave, it was heard by all within sight. And it was an open area.

"What's up?" Jason walked over to the computer with faux casualty and leaned over the desk to see what the redhead was looking at. Dick followed with Damian tailing behind him, curiosity and concern wondering what type of 'records' could stump Babas of all people. Behind her chair he looked over the screen.

"Hmm? Oh, I was reorganizing some of the old cave footage from a while back, but I noticed that a lot of Tim's Robin training was missing. There's a file that he has that has access to footage if it was ever needed, and I could easily hack into it, but the time frames don't really line up. I'll try to skim through the cave footage real quick of after his training, maybe there'll be a hint or something about why, but then I'll go through Tim's file."

The Birds of Gotham watched as their Oracle dragged the cursor, pulled up some old footage, and sped the records up until they were blurs. She paused the mostly mono-colored blur of a video when the telltale colors of a traffic light appeared to show the third Robin; setting up a mat to spar with Batman on. Clicking echoed across the walls of the cave as Barbra slowed the footage to a speed where they could hear what was being said in front of one of the many cameras in the cave that was being recorded. The redhead's brows began to furrow and Dicks lips pulled into a worried and confused frown as the four watched. They watched as the Bat and the Robin fought, as Tim was knocked down again and again and again, as he got up every time, as the two moved in blurs, as B hit too hard with too much of a lack of hesitation, as B kept repeating the same word each time.

"Again."

As Tim was knocked down roughly and his arm hit the mat first with a sickening Crack, as he didn't get back up.

"Again."

Dick thinks he might be nauseous. Dick also thinks that Jason's hands will start to bleed soon with how hard he's gripping them while they all watch in horror as Tim stays on the mat, the only sound I'm and out of the video coming from the bats above and the natural erie echo that all caves have. There's slight panting coming from the two who just fought on screen and Babs silently sped the footage up as B- no, Batman,- left the cave. They saw as, eventually, Tim picked himself up and made his way to the med bay and leaving as soon as he could after patching himself up to the best of his ability. Barbra sped up the clip and they observed as the Third Bird returned night after night, never staying for so much as a post-patrol snack. They saw as a past-NightWing came on screen and Dick leaned over Barb and paused the computer.

It was silent for a few excruciating, guilt-ridden, and horrifying moments until Dick interrupted the moment himself.

"..How did we not notice...? How.. How long had this been happening...? Why didn't I notice?"

Looking at the screen itself, Dick failed to see as Damian unpaused the clip until it began to play, feeling even worse as he realized he forgot the younger was still there, curling into himself and balling his fists. How could this happen? Dick was right there, angry and hateful and desperate and devastated and grieving, but Tim was also there, right there and he was suffering and hurt and desperate and smalland-

The four of them all startled as now unpaused screaming came from the computer, arguing that nobody's heard since Damian came to the manor filling the space as Dick gasps at the familiar comments yet couldn't process or comprehend a single word yelled. They couldn't even see the eldest vigilantes from the camera that had been pulled up on the largest screen, although they could from one of the others, what captured their attention was that they could still see Tim sitting quietly in the Robin costume, out of sight to the two fighting yet able to see them himself. Past-NightWing and Past-Batman seemed to scream for hours in what was only a minute for the people in the present, and Tim stayed quietly watching from afar the whole while. They then watch as the clip speeds up and a few days later past-Dick comes over post-patrol all smiley and invites Tim out for lunch for the next day. Tim accepts politely.

"I-... I remember that lunch. I thought the kid I was eating with was weird and creepy 'cause I thought that was the first time we'd properly gone out. I barely knew him- I just thought he was trying to be polite because he was so quiet so I- I jus-"

Jason slams a fist against- something,- and turns around to start stomping away. Dick hesitates going after him as he looks down at Damian to see him the most afraid Dick thinks he's ever seen the Baby Bat be, and while he can tell Jason needs time, he might also need reassurance, but Dami looks so scared that Dick can't just leave him, but what if he ends up hating Dick for allowingthistohappen,andBarbras'frozen,sowhatifBarbraneeds-orwhatif-butthey-Dickneedstohelp-

Jason didn't end up getting that far as the elevator dingged and everyone froze. There were only a few people still at the manor by now. Alfred, Bruce, Duke, Cass, or-

The doors opened and out stepped Tim. He was typing on his phone with one hand and not looking up, dressed like he was a Gotham Uni kid going out for lunch and it wasn't post-vigilante-O'clock in a dark red sweater over a white colored undershirt and jeans. In his other hand he carried a duffle bag over his shoulder. Where the heck was he going?

"Drake?"

"Hmm?" The boy in question turned his head towards Damian, though not looking away from the phone in his hand as he walked.

"Where are you going? Was it not adequate?"

At that Tim grinned at Baby Bat, finally looking up from where he was heading to the Zeta tubes and stopping to reply.

"Me, my team, Pru, Z, and Bern are meeting up tomorrow to test it out, so I'm going to the tower so we can all meet up at the same time. I loved it, and have it in my bag if you want to come; everyone's responsible for bringing their own or buying one when we get there though, and you know what the others will insist, so if you want you can try and steal B's card Brat."

Dick was... still concerned, and guilty, but also now very confused. Tim turned and exited, entering a Zeta after entering some type of code. Damian seemed less tense and he was no longer shaking when Dick looked back at him, but the kid ran off before he could get anymore of a read on him to, presumably, steal one of Bruce's credit cards.

Babs was still still in her chair staring blankly at the computer, and Jason turned to make his way to where he left his bike gear to probably leave the cave and go no-contact for the next few days. Dick. Dick.... Dick didn't know what to do. But everybody both froze and jumped at the voice of Cass.

"Happy Birthday Little Brother."

If I posted my shitty writing prompts I never had enough motivation to figure out the ending of, would you like it? I write irl in my free time, just wondering if I should post it here too

[disney-is-mylife]

I don’t understand why people hate Snow White’s husband so much?!?!? It’s not like he’s a creep or anything.

There are two main reasons: Number 1, compared to the other princes, he's the most boring. The film was made in 1937, it pioneered film animation, so it's bound to not exactly be chock full of Complicated Characters, that's just the way it is. He's a product of his time.

The other is because ....... *sigh* the annoying online spread of misinformation that he's supposedly 28 or 30 or some BS and she's only 14 🙄

(Note: ahead, I'll be ranting at the Haters, not at you @cleverqueencommander ^^")

Here's the CANONICAL truth, peeps: NO AGES ARE EVER MENTIONED IN THE MOVIE. EVER. NOT ONCE. If it's not in the text, it's not Canon. We can only assume based off of visual hints.

Now, that said, is Snow White probably one of the youngest princesses? I'd say so, but only because she has that "baby face" and chubbier cheeks. Let's say she's 15-16. Okay. Have you SEEN Princey Boy's face??

LOOK AT THIS DORK. That is NOT a 30 year old creep, that is a BABY! He cannot POSSIBLY be older than 19!! I'd say he's 17-18, max, but he's most likely ALSO 15-16 like Snow!

Snow White and her Prince embody YOUTH and YOUNG LOVE. The spell literally calls for "Love's FIRST Kiss" to awaken Snow White. Not "True Love's Kiss." FIRST KISS. That goes BOTH WAYS, it's THEIR FIRST KISS.

They are precious babies who are each other's first love and I refuse to hear any more slander claiming "isn't he supposed to be 28??" when that was pulled out of someone's ass to make Disney Look Bad >.<

[osamucide]

DAZAI HCS! ⊹

LAST UPDATE: OCT 10

cw: talk of mental illness and substance use/abuse, speculation about Dazai’s f’ed up past+trauma, Dazai-typical references to suicide, references to self harm, probably a lot of projection on the author’s part

reid: i feel like yapping about Dazai tonight so here’s a non-exhaustive list of general headcanons i have about him. no word count because i’ll probably update this periodically lol

he does not listen to music from this century. he just doesn’t. not that he goes out of his way not to, he’s just drawn to a certain sound that only older music seems to have—I think The Smiths, Blondie, Tears For Fears, The Smashing Pumpkins, King Crimson, and Led Zeppelin are among his favorite artists

I think he also really enjoys classic jazz/blues/bebop music—Charles Mingus, Billie Holiday, Duke Ellington, Thelonious Monk, Miles Davis, etc.

he’s anemic. I’m of the firm belief that Kunikida buys him a 100 ct bottle of iron tablets every 100 days which Dazai always graciously accepts. however, he only actually takes them when he gives enough of a shit to (which is not often) so the bottles are just accumulating on his bathroom sink/in the cupboard beneath

nail biter, cuticle picker, hair twirler, thigh bouncer, etc. I don’t think he really sits still unless it’s absolutely necessary

children love him, much to his dismay. they think he’s entertaining. he thinks they’re like puppies (and he canonically hates dogs). he won’t treat them badly, but he’s just not super interested in interacting with them. unwilling older brother vibe when faced with them. shithead kids can stoke his rage much faster than Chuuya ever could

he cannot take care of a fucking plant. has one succulent in his apartment. it’s surviving out of pure unadulterated spite. he hasn’t watered it in over a year

wearer of funky socks. his favorites are either the ones that say "I love my job ha ha just kidding" or the custom ones Yosano got him as a gag gift one year for white elephant at the office christmas party (they have Kunikida’s rage face on them)

really sad that, despite his criminal record being scrubbed clean, he is still banned from driving in the nation of Japan for the rest of his life because he wants a Ford Explorer so bad

PROFOUNDLY SOUND KNOWLEDGE OF MEDICAL TERMINOLOGY

he’s fluent in Japanese and English, proficient in French and Italian, and learning Russian

I think he also enjoys learning math/researching random shit/reading anything he can in his free time when he feels up to it. he never received a formal education and his IQ is through the roof—his yearning for academia is almost like an itch he has to scratch every once in a while. also, he just likes knowing things

he never learned how to ride a bike. wahhhh wahh

BPD king. look at him. my beautiful princess with a disorder. I doubt he’s diagnosed but he strongly suspects it seeing as he’s so self-aware; if not borderline, he just assumes he has severe PTSD. either way, he really won’t do anything other than what he already knows about how to manage it

along the same lines—he’s been a functional alcoholic since an alarmingly young age (I’m talking 16-17). I think it probably got a lot worse post-defection when he was underground, but he hardly had to function then anyway; he gets somewhat better after joining the Agency but still has a dependence, it’s just not severe enough to debilitate him

has a bin of art supplies in his apartment. he only ever pulls them out once every few months, but he rather enjoys painting and wouldn’t mind getting better at it

master at darts. don’t take him to a bar where there’s a dartboard. he will stand in front of it all night and obliterate everyone who challenges him

insatiable sweet tooth. he especially loves anything maple, butter pecan, or butterscotch he’s a grandpa

UPDATE.1

I love to headcanon that he has a glass eye!!! and that the bandages around his head in the dark era were some legitimate injury. he likes to pop it out as a party trick/to weird Kunikida out

he feeds the stray cats and kittens that linger around the ADA dorms. he probably spends some of his grocery money on the fancy wet canned food and leaves it out with a big plastic bowl of water. sometimes sits and watches them eat and likes to give them little scratches if they trust him enough to come rub up on his legs. they’re sort of to him as the orphans were to Odasaku, and it makes him feel closer to his deceased friend

on the note of grocery shopping—he only goes when Atsushi or Kunikida drag him along. keeps his list relatively the same from trip to trip: canned crab, cigarettes, bandages, a few cases of beer, sake, instant ramen, ice cream (particularly butter pecan), paper towels, and 3-in-1 shampoo when he needs it. Kunikida forces vegetables upon him (“put it in the ramen so you don’t die of heart disease”) but they almost always end up rotting to mush in his fridge. he steals his toilet paper from the ADA bathrooms/supply closets or bothers Atsushi and Kyoka for spare rolls when he’s out

religiously orders drinks from the cafe on his way in and out of work. on mornings he usually gets a latte with plenty of sugar and some sort of flavor; in the evenings he probably gets an iced flavored tea to mix or chase his sake with when he gets home

always has a pocket knife on him. probably one he got in his mafia days, or, it’s at least a habit/security he picked up from then

takes a lot of night walks. he doesn’t sleep well, so I think he probably wanders out tipsy with his pack of cigarettes in the wee hours of the morning and scuttles around to tire himself out

UPDATE.2

two words: medical trauma. I know some people get iffy when it comes to speculation about what Mori did/didn’t/may/may not have subjected him too as a young teenager (and believe me I have a lot of thoughts) but I definitely headcanon that Dazai was used as a little bit of a lab rat/sedated and coerced to some degree when it came to turning him into a killing machine. as a result, he’s got a fear of medical settings. after his surgery during the cannibalism arc? I know he got that phone back and was like “Tanizaki get me out of here right neow”

I think sweet little old ladies probably love him and he loves them too. always feels like he strikes up the best small talk with them. will help load groceries into their cars for them. he gets all smiley and stuff when they call him “sweetheart” “honey” “dear” or remark how handsome he is and about his hypothetical girlfriend must be so lucky

he can throw knives with pinpoint accuracy from a pretty impressive distance. he’s a little less accurate with his handgun at long range/with moving targets but HE’S GETTING BETTER

has like a 3.5 ft vertical jump at his best. like why are you a detective when the Lakers need a center

[mochirizu]

A collection of WK headcanons because I can

MARTIN - 28, 5'10, he/him, December 23rd(Capricorn)

BIGGEST heart on the team. Sees good in everybody

He's like if someone gave a golden retriever a human suit.

BANNED from the kitchen he CANNOT COOK at his ancient self

He pulls the 'big brother card' a LOT

He LOVES to sing, but nobody has the heart to tell him he sucks so they just...let him

He loves so easily

Martin makes the stupidest dad jokes

He labels his things with a blue sticker so he can keep his stuff organized... he still loses things

He taught himself Mandarin Chinese out of sheer boredom; he is now almost fluent

He needs people to like him or he will DIE

Do not give him coffee; he will be insane and hyperactive and then go awol for the rest of the day

CHRIS - 24, 5'8, he/him, July 19th(Gemini)

Burned-out gifted kid? Yes

His experiments normally consist of him using Martin as his guinea pig for payback for all the jokes he got pulled on as a kid

Loves cinnamon-flavoured anything

He also has a pretty high spice tolerance

Used to be friends with Zach in preschool, but it stopped not long after that

He climbs trees because he's a sensory seeker.

Chris is an avid tea drinker

He is also the best dancer on the team

Chris was such a geek in high school, he didn't 'glow up' until he was 17

Since the Tazzy incident, Chris occasionally has cravings for raw meat but chalks it up to low-iron

The only one on the team with a consistent sleep schedule

AVIVA -26, 5'5, she/her, April 5th(Aries)

Her dad raised her to be tough and strong, therefore making her a perfectionist and a maniac lol

Aviva loves Hot chocolate with Marshmallows, and watching nostalgic cartoons

She has a nasty habit of comparing herself to others and gets ridiculously insecure when anyone challenges her opinion. She masks it by being defensive and doubling down

Beautiful by default(duh) but she doesn't see it

She has a nasty older brother who was the stem of all her insecurities

She found a grey hair once and cried

She was cheer captain in high school, hence her athleticism

Aviva is messy as hell. Like, more messy than Martin.

She also dislikes mud

The worst dancer on the crew(I'm sorry), but she's the most talented singer

NEVER lets her hair down, it gets in the way too much.

KOKI - 27, 5'4, she/they, Feburary 13th(Aquarius)

Raised by a single dad(parents divorced)

Grew up basically rich, but was kept humble

Koki's uncle taught her mechanics before he passed away when she was in middle school

She had a pet canary named Booboo

She has pent-up anger issues

LOVES Zytago music as her family comes from New Orleans

She 100% has muscles and biceps. Martin is jealous

"No, I'm not gay. Everyone wants to kiss their girlfriends at some point....right?"

When it comes to cooking, she's Jimmy's sous-chef

HATES being in tight or confined spaces

Wants to style her hair in something else other than a single puff, but always gets busy before she can book an appointment with a stylist

JIMMY - 25, 5'9, he/they/doesn't care, August 20th(Leo)

Had a very normal childhood. Like, eerily normal.

Has a younger brother and an older sister and they are ALL GINGER.

Everyone in his family is a Ginge except for his mom

Jimmy can speak nearly fluent Korean because he took a gap year in South Korea after High School.

He studied software engineering but dropped out to attend culinary school instead

He is the COOKING MASTER EVER

His family is secretly wealthy as FUCK

He has his own power suit, just never uses it

Had an emo phase

Jimmy's full name is James Coleman Benedict Zeigler

Grandma Jimmena has a bunch of random stories from her childhood and they are all UNHINGED

[littlecrittereli]

Hello, me again, your Guardianship AU has latched onto my brain and won’t let go so I have more questions

First, how much does Chris know about the CPS hounding Martin? Does he understand that there’s a real possibility he could be removed from his brother’s custody? In the comic you made, when they were younger, Chris was pretty oblivious about it all (mostly cause Martin didn’t wanna worry him and didn’t tell him any details) but now that he’s a bit older, has he picked up on certain things? ‘Cause you’ve also mentioned that the AU has decent resemblance to Lilo & Stitch, but in that movie Lilo seems very aware of their situation which isn’t the case for Martin and Chris, especially because Martin’s personality is pretty opposite to Nani.

Second, and I totally get it if you don’t know, I’m just an over-thinker, but how would the parents have died in your AU? Because I can see the cause of death being pretty traumatizing depending on what it is, especially for Martin who was old enough to understand what was going on followed by the responsibility of raising his younger brother who is basically the only family he has left. Maybe even for Chris, though as you mention he was too young and doesn’t remember them much anymore.

Once again, love your AUs, Guardianship AU is clearly my favorite but I’m a sucker for sibling dynamics, especially the trope “brothers-against-the-world”.

Chris is definitely more aware of Child Protective Services than he was when he was a kid. They aren’t AS much of a threat anymore which is why Chris isn’t really worried about them. Martin has custody of him, and he just gets evaluated every so often to make sure he’s taking care of Chris and providing him a healthy and stable environment. (CPS is very concerned about chris traveling in the Tortuga but mostly leave them alone now) Martin definitely gets hella stressed when these evaluations come along, but he’s been doing this dance with CPS for so long by that point he’s not as worried. When he was 17, and freshly emancipated he was fightin for his life in those courtrooms 💀

Chris knows about it now, but in his eyes, Martin is the best guardian ever? He cannot fathom the idea of Martin being an “unfit guardian” so he can’t even imagine a situation where CPS would have a reason to take him. Which is also a small point of tension for them? Because on one hand Martin is glad his brother isn’t worried and trusts him, but also feels frustrated by Chris not taking it seriously or understanding the weight of it like he does.

But Chris is honestly more worried about Martin getting sick of having to drag him around and giving up custody of him. But those are repressed emotions to unpack for another day.

And I don’t actually have a reassonnn for the parents death yet. In the hypothetical fanfiction that I have not written yet, I don’t want to explicitly state it. Its something they dont like to talk about. And they probably get really nervous/jittery around any subjects related to the cause. I’m leaning more towards something like a car accident. Something that could happen to anyone, but also very tragic. It’s technically not decided for sure though! So im open to any suggestions at the moment.

[maneatrrz]

‧₊˚✩ 01 ; girls like girls / k. sully

♡ 𓂃 ꒰ girls like girls! ꒱˚.༄ ೃ kiri sully x fem!reader. 901 words. one of two. ⌒(≧▽​° )

𓆩♡𓆪 synopsis: kiri sully was certain she wouldn’t ever exist to you-at least, not in the way that she wanted to.

content: na'vi!reader, metkayina!reader, emo teenage angst!kiri, reluctant babysitter!kiri, kiri turning into shakespeare. tuk being the sweet little demon baby she was meant to be. she is my child and i love her so dearly. i don't know, this is pretty short for the first part? but i wanted to get this out for the additional notes and i was just having writer's block with it. sorry!

ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷ additional notes: i have posted this in the midst of aging drama-the actor who portrays kiri, sigourney weaver, is not a minor. and according to john landau, james cameron's literal production partner, the na'vi have a longer lifespan than humans: 160-180 years, as oppose to the average 80, and they are older than the "equivalent-looking human". as in: na'vi years and human years are not the same. the na'vi reach their adulthood in the time that is equal to 15-17 human years. after that, their aging stagnates. which means if lo'ak and kiri have been alive for fourteen human years, and neteyam has been for fifteen-lo'ak and kiri are the human equivalent of seventeen, and neteyam is eighteen. idk what to tell you girlies. these are 8-foot tall, motion-rigged blue space aliens. enough. i turned eighteen like two months ago and watching you guys made my head hurt. let's put this energy towards real-life child predators, and women & men pushing thirty simping for blatanly established human minor characters! anyways, hope you enjoy this first part of the fic. thank you lovelies.

୨✩୧ ; fic under the cut!

there was no reason for kiri sully to feel such ardor towards you. absolutely none. yet, she couldn’t help but be entranced by the way you moved through the waves.

you were just gliding through cerulean waters with lo’ak, neteyam, tsireya, ao’nung, and roxto. jake had introduced you all to the human custom of ‘marco polo’ when you were young, and it seemed you had never grown out of it. kiri had been thrown out of the game, looking over tuk’tirey for her father while she made a sandcastle. tuk was especially displeased with this, as she thought she could beat you all flawlessly in marco polo. but alas, she was not allowed to wade out that far.

watching your every move from afar, kiri surmised that you were not very good at this game. every single person who was marco before had gotten you immediately, no matter how far away you started. probably because you would start splashing and kicking every time they got close, through a fit of feverish giggles. especially when lo’ak was marco-he’d ignore everyone else just to get to you. then, it became the coquettish game of ‘how fast can [name] swim to escape impending doom?’

“this sucks,” she caviled and clutched a stick limply, etching your name in the warm, manila sand.

“you would feel better if you built a sandcastle,” tuk hummed with an expectant lilt, looking at kiri.

“i would feel better if i was lo’ak.”

“would you really? he kinda smells.”

“true,” kiri tilted her head with a nod, scribbling out your name. “[name] doesn’t seem to care, though.”

“oh, blegh,” tuk’tirey stuck her tongue out, swatting at kiri. “stop that.”

“jeez, jeez-” kiri raised her hands in defense of tuk’s minacious and staunch (endearing and incredibly light) pummels. “tuk, i’m not even doing anything!”

“you’re doing that thing that daddy does when mommy looks at tonowari for more than like, two seconds. you’re being all,” tuk did a sashay back to her sandcastle before turning around and putting her hands on her hips, “j-e-l-u-s. jealous.”

“hello? it’s j-e-a-l-o-u-s. you literally cannot spell.”

“i’m literally seven and i’m trying my best.”

“fair enough. but i’m not jealo-” she was cut off by tuk ‘kikiki’-ing at her with an outstretched finger. “you know what? fine. maybe i am a little bit jealous. but it’s not like it matters, anyways.”

kiri threw her head back, falling into the sand. she stared up at the calm azure heavens adorned with ivory, velvet clouds. the image paired perfectly with what kiri called the polyphonic melody of unrequited love: her pining heartbeat reverberating through her spine, your distant, cherubic laughter, and the sound of the waves skimming across the shore, before melting back slowly into the sea. as far as kiri was aware, you only knew her as one of two of neteyam’s (your neighbor) siblings your age. not the goofy, obnoxious younger brother with unkempt braids and winsome dimples, but the brooding basketcase of a sister. the looming, deviant character who thought she could feel the heartbeat of the empyrean, the atlantis, and the motherlands. she was certain that to you, she faded miserably in comparison to the awkwardly-charming foreigner and prodigal eldest son that newly inhabited awa’atlu. she could tell from the way you hung on every honey-coated word that was uttered from neteyam’s lips-big, sparkly doe eyes complete with dilated pupils completely enraptured by him. kiri could tell from the way those roseate, glacé lips of yours curved into an intoxicating smile that she simply couldn’t get enough of, everytime lo’ak unleashed his ‘comedic brilliance’. she was certain she wouldn’t ever exist to you-at least, not in the way that she wanted to. “yeah, this seriously sucks.”

“why don’t you just ask if she likes you?” a query from tuk that made kiri jolt up, turning her head to tuk’tirey in bewilderment.

“absolutely flabbergasting. that you just told me, to do that.”

“why? whenever i have a question, i ask it.”

“but this is different, tuk,” kiri exhaled deeply, bringing her knees to her chest. she ran her hands through her hair, before scratching the top of her head. “she’s a girl, and i’m not a boy.”

“so? i don’t see a problem,” tuk contorted her face in confusion, before shrugging and kicking her meticulously crafted sand fortress-she was getting bored. she sat down crisscrossed in front of kiri, tapping her nose. “girls like girls, like boys do. nothing new.”

 tuk’s idea was not entirely inane as kiri’s riposte made it out to be. it was getting harder to mask her tempestuous affinity for you, with each passing moment. you merely being around her made her heart beat at such a frenetic pace in her sternum. your scent permeated her senses, suffusing her cheeks a feverish and tender sanguine-you smelled as saccharine as the candied simpers you gave her, with light floral notes and a hint of ocean’s brine. and your visage-oh, your countenance as a whole-remained steadfast as the most ravishingly beauteous thing she had ever seen. you were like a painting to her: every curve and every color was painted by eywa’s pedantic hand.

“so if i were to…” kiri closed her eyes with a sharp, delayed sigh, shaking her head. “...confess, when would i? or-how would i?”

tuk’s mouth curved into a smile laced with playful, youthful malign.

kiri was going to have her hands full, wasn’t she?

all writing works are my own, do not repost or repost on platforms such as archive of our own (ao3), wattpad, fanfiction.net, and the like. — maneatrrz © 2023.

[stevetonyweekly]

SteveTony Weekly - April 28 - Week 17

Hello, friends, hopefully you had a great week! Here’s what I read this week--I revisited a favorite by Sineala. Check it out and be sure to leave comments/kudos if you enjoy it! 

~ 

Safe Haven by gottalovev, zappedbysnow

It's been three months since the Battle of New York. Four since Steve woke up in the future. Everything is still too fast, too bright, too glib. And then, as if it wasn't enough, Steve is dragged through a portal into an alternate universe. Other Him is happy, though, and that feels like hope.

my thoughts: I love Steve realizing he could and should be happy. The hope that he was given by someone else is just--so lovely to me.

Cicada Days by Captain_Panda

The serum's failing. Overwhelmed by the implications, Steve runs.

Tony Stark catches up to him. And then he puts his foot on the gas pedal.

Because nothing says summer love like a road trip.

my thoughts: come for the angst and stay for ironbound the shark. This has been on my tbr for a while because i KNEW it would hurt me, and it did. And it was lovely.

he's written mine on my upper thigh by meidui

If Tony really wanted to set boundaries, he wouldn’t be picking up Steve’s call this late at night.

If he didn’t want this ill-advised romp with Steve to go any further, he wouldn’t have been on his couch reading a book Steve left behind the one night Morgan is away at a sleepover; he would be on a date with someone his age, someone who isn’t his goddamn babysitter.

my thoughts: i'm obsessed with the way that meidui writes babysitter!Steve. He's so needy and lovely and unapologetic in his devotion to Tony, and Tony 'trying to do the right thing' Stark needs to just get onboard.

the only love i haven't screwed up by meidui

When Steve wakes up from the ice, there’s somebody waiting for him. He's handsome, and older, and he tells Steve that they're soulmates and he's waited all his life to find him.

my thoughts: the way that this soulmate fic plays out is heartbreaking and lovely.

Thrust Issues by Sineala for phoenixmetaphor

A battle gone wrong leads Tony to the unexpected and pleasant discovery that Steve is much more well-endowed than he could ever have imagined. But when Tony learns that Steve has never actually been able to sleep with anyone because of his size, Tony does what any good friend would do: he offers to relieve Steve of his virginity. Personally. Tony's determined, Tony's methodical, and Tony has a plan. He's going to get Steve laid. Tony just needs to make sure Steve never finds out that Tony's in love with him.

my thoughts: Sineala always hits just right with her Steve and Tony and I absolutely adored my reread of this one, how Steve is trying so hard to make this MORE and how Tony just--cannot fathom that Steve would ever want to date him. The 'you're straight' scene is honestly so fantastic.

[readychilledwine]

do you ever feel awkward writing for Eris? I saw your poll about doing an SJM bad guys week, so I'm guessing not.

Warning - This is going to become SJM critical. Please know I am not anti any of these characters. I am, however, critical of SJM as a long-time fantasy reader.

You answered your own question in your ask there, friend.

I do not have issues writing for Eris. The main issue the fandom has with him is the situation with Mor, and here's my stance on that:

We have an issue with the timeline around this incident, so I will make my judgement call when SJM does her eventual retcon and fixes it.

We know Eris is younger than Mor and Rhys, who are around the same age. Mor was sold to Autumn as Eris's bride at the tender age of 17. When Helion is giving us his gorgeous monolog talking about his love for Momma Autumn, we find out that she and Beron were married young and had barely been married for two decades around the start of the first war. Meaning Eris was around 19 at the time.

This passage from Rhys is a little hazy and unclear, but from how I and several other people took it, he was around 28 at the start of that war, meaning Mor was also around 27 to 28. That makes Mor at least 8 to 9 years older than Eris. Meaning, he potentially was a LITERAL child when he and Mor were engaged. He would have been around the age of 7 to 9 and already had the mindset to fear Beron.

This where I am going to look SJM critical. She is great at a few things, creating plotholes by retconing, and fucking up timelines due to her retconing.

Let's say she retcons to correct that issue. We still know Eris is younger than Mor by a year or two. So, let's say he was 15 to 16. At 15 to 16 years old, I want you to think about what you would have done in this situation:

You are a young prince or princess. Your father is a known abuser and racist. You all have just found out your betrothed has sullied themselves with a person your father considers below all of you, and you know it was done to get out of a marriage she did not want to be in. You and your men find her on the border of your father's court, beaten and with a nail in her womb. Here are your options:

1. You take her back to your father, the known racist and abuser. Thus making her, in reality, his problem. You have witnessed how your father likes to handle his problems. You also know he's angry and embarrassed this female made the choice to sleep with a lesser born bastard Illyrian over marry his high fae princeling.

2. You cannot risk touching her, so leave her somewhere her friends can find her without risking her or them having to enter Autumn. This will allow her to go home, where she is safe, and heal.

In both scenarios, Eris could not win. He either took Mor to his father and risked her death and was blamed for that, or he left her knowing her friends were more than likely coming and be blamed for that as well. He was now the villain in Mor's story regardless of what actions he took, and he was that villain as a teen. A literal child. As a child he picked to allow Morrigan life. To allow her to live without being trapped the way he and his mother are.

Eris, in theory, made a selfless choice. He made the choice to damn himself and his reputation for the sake of Mor and as he says, it cost him..

As for me being willing to write other SJM bad guys-

It is perfectly normal and acceptable in every other fandom to be attracted to the bad guys and to write dark fanfiction about them. You see it all time in Tolkien, Harry Potter, and (grossly since they are all children) it has resurged in the Percy Jackson fandom. Please have several seats and let me, and the several other people who are excited for it, enjoy my little story about Pollux, my reader, and his heavy cock that sways to and fro.

It's also, as someone pumping out the amount of content I am right now, really nice to get to write a dark fic with a villain here and there for a change of pace, so thank you to everyone who is supportive and open to me doing that.

[jisunghannie]

Jealousy Wins

PAIRING: Felix x fem!reader

WARNING: minors DNI with this post. This post has explicit content. This is written for entertainment purposes, and I cannot predict every interaction with this post.

SUMMARY: You were jealous that Felix was gaining more female attention by each song he sung in (literally every song they post), and wanted to make your mark on Felix so that way the next time anyone saw him they would think twice.

WORD COUNT: 3,021

A/N:

`○°.• ✿ •.°○` = Timeskip

-ah is used to describe someone younger

This is my first attempt at writing smut. I apologize if it's not good, but I will work on it!

This story contains swearing, praise, reader who is Han's younger sister, pet names, etc!

You were Jisung's younger sister. You guys were a year apart, so not too far apart in age. Your older brother had joined a kpop group when he was 13 or 14 when he became a trainee, then debuted at age 17. After your brother's 2nd year as a trainee, you met Lee Felix. Soon, Seungmin and Jeongin or I.N came as well. Who were all incoming trainees as well. Over time, you got used to having Felix around as he was closer in age with Jisung, given they were only a day apart.

You remembered vividly on your brother's 17th birthday, it was 11:58. After singing happy birthday, he blew out his candles. Then the clock struck midnight as you lit Felix's candles. After singing happy birthday, he blew out his candles. They were both now 17. The laughs you 3 shared that night were wondrous. Also, you would've never forgotten that night because that was the night that you fell in love with Felix.

As you looked at him with adoration in your eyes he smiled and looked at you, "Is there something on my face?" He asked as you shook your head. "Sorry, no, just admiring this moment with you two." You said as Felix laughed. "Just wait until your birthday angel." He said as you felt butterflies in your stomach flutter as he called you that. You weren't one for pet names ever but Felix was an exception.

`○°.• ✿ •.°○`

It was your 19th birthday and after you blew your candles out. Felix told you to wait as he walked out to get your gift. When he returned it was a poster that said, 'Happy 19th, Let's celebrate 2 things tonight. Be my girlfriend?' You covered your mouth in awe at the poster as you gave him a hug.

"Yes! Yes! I'll be your girlfriend!" You said as you guys finally shared your first kiss. As you kissed, you heard Jisung make a disgusted noise. "Warning next time!" He said, his hands covering his eyes now as both you and Felix laughed.

`○°.• ✿ •.°○`

It has been a long 3 years in your relationship with Felix. Of course you guys had your ups and downs in a relationship. But that wasn't your main concern. After he was given lyrics which caused him to use his deeper range of vocals, he gained a large media following and a bunch of personal stay fangirls.

You were used to seeing a bunch of girls in his message requests, but he always reassured you that he only had eyes for you but some of them were just too pretty for him to just ignore. You knew that. Maybe you were just insecure but you wanted to somehow prove that you were better than those girls. After all, it was a competition.

You saw how some girl tried getting all touchy with him at their most recent event and you were upset. So you wanted a way to get back at her. You were petty to say the least but that was your boyfriend and you were going to enjoy it. You don't know what came over you but you really wanted to make a bold move on your boyfriend. It had been a full 3 years in your relationship with Felix and you guys haven't engaged in anything serious. The most skinship-like thing you guys have ever done was most likely the time you made out in a game of seven minutes in heaven. You wanted more than that. You won't lie that in previous years you touched yourself to the thought of your boyfriend but never brought yourself to talk about it because you were genuinely embarrassed. So that became your dirty secret.

However, wanting to take it to the next stage in your relationship you knew you had to take the initiative and act first in order to get what you wanted. You wanted Felix. A night of passion but you didn't want to be too blunt about it so you came up with a plan. A proposal. That would've changed everything between the two of you. After all, he was your first love and you were his. This plan would have made you his first time too and vice versa with you.

"Lixie. Let's have a game night tomorrow, you and me. Loser has to do whatever the winner asks." Felix smiled. "Anything?" He said with his deep voice as he wore a mischievous smirk. "I don't like that smirk nor that tone of voice. But yes anything." You said as he looked at you. "What game love?" He asked, innocently enough. "Hmm I'm debating between strip poker or truth or dare." You said as Felix looked dejected. "Please do truth or dare... I'm horrible at poker..." He begged. "And if I don't..?" You said as he walked over to you leaving small kisses on your neck. "Please.. for me angel..?" He asked, his face relaxed on your shoulder. How could you say no to that. "Fine..." You blushed, "Only for tomorrow." You said as he smiled, kissing your head.

The next day you spent the whole day trying to pick out a lingerie set that you thought Felix would like. You settled for a white and baby blue lingerie set. You genuinely hoped Felix would've liked it.

When you got back home it was 7 pm. You didn't realize that you took the whole day picking out 1 set of lingerie, you left at 10 am. But to be fair you had to run errands to get makeup, get groceries, buy new sheets because you were hoping that they were going to be ruined by the end of the night and a few other things.

You had done your makeup so now it was time to wear the lingerie. You put it on. But it was squeezing you like crazy. Did you grab a size too small? When you looked in the mirror it shaped you out well but you could hardly move in it. As you walked back to your shared room. You walked in and saw a very surprised Felix.

"Wow... love... I... is that for... woah..." Felix couldn't even speak. He eyed you up and down as if you were some eye candy. "Y/n is that... is that for me..?" He asked as he looked at you with needy eyes. You realized that the game night idea had failed. Miserably.

"Not until later but yes..." You said embarrassed that he caught you looking like that. "Can it be now..?" He asked, walking over to you holding your hips. "It's been a long day..." He said almost whining. "Not yet love, I said later." You said as he clung onto you, kissing your exposed shoulders up to your jawline. "Please..?" He begged, "You look so pretty in that..." He praised.

You kept telling him no as he begged you over and over again.

"Besides I have to change, it's not comfortable." You said your back facing him as he hugged you from behind. Whispering in your ear. "I can take it off if you just give me the okay angel..." He said huskily as you felt your ears burn red. "Lixie!" You said embarrassed smacking his head that tested on your shoulder.

"I'm serious y/n..." He said, grabbing your wrist, "Please... I want you.. no, I need you..." He whined, kissing your hand, practically making out with your hand. You blushed at the sight trying to pull your hand away but you knew it was pointless. You were going to have to give in at one point but didn't think it would be so soon.

"Felix... stop it..." You said quietly as he picked up on your tone he was satisfied. "Please angel..? Can I see your pretty body..?" He asked you.

You guys had spent 3 years in a relationship and not once have you seen each other naked, you've seen him shirtless and he's seen you in a bikini but fully naked? Never. Not once have you guys showered together or have had any sexual experiences. The most you guys have done is left hickeys on each other and made out. You touched yourself to the thought of Felix and maybe he has touched himself to the thought of you but of course, even if he has why would he tell you because you sure as hell wouldn't have told him.

"No Felix... what if you regret it..?" You said slightly insecure. As you said that you felt something against you. You blushed and made a sound of surprise. Felix smirked as he whispered in your ear, "How can you say I'll regret it when you have me reacting like this..?" He was getting too needy and wanted you badly. You blushed, speechless at what he just said as you were still trying to process everything.

"Please..? I promise I'll be a good boy and be gentle. I've watched enough videos and done my own studying to know..." He said as you blushed and turned to him. "God Felix, how horny can you get?! I don't even think I'm as bad as you..." You said as he gave a deep chuckle. "Let's just say I know a few more things than you'd expect." He said.

Your so-called innocent, angel-like boyfriend wasn't as sweet and pure as you thought. Matter of fact, he was a horny and sure as hell sexy male. You didn't want to admit it but desperation was a good look on him. Seeing him beg and want you was definitely something. You enjoyed the show but it was definitely shocking.

"Fine, but you need to lead me through it, I don't know how to do anything." You said embarrassed, not believing you guys were actually doing this. "With pleasure." Felix said with a seductive tone. Next thing you knew you were kissing on your bed with him on top of you. He was shirtless and you were still in full lingerie.

"You're so pretty... all for me too..." Felix said admiring your state. You were embarrassed and tried to cover up. He chuckled and grabbed your hands and interlocked your fingers with his. "Don't cover yourself please... you look so pretty..." He praised. You didn't know why but whenever he called you pretty you felt yourself go crazy.

"Lixie... this is so embarrassing..." You said still not processing your guys' situation. He caressed your cheek. "I can always stop if you want. Just tell me okay love..?" He reassured you as he went back to kissing you. You knew dressed like this that it was pointless to fight against him if he wasn't expecting something out of it.

Noticing you were still embarrassed he moved his hands and kissed down your body until he reached down to the piece of fabric covering your most sensitive spot. Felix looked at you for confirmation if he could take it off. You nodded slightly as Felix hummed. He took it off and placed your legs on each of his shoulders.

"I'm going to start so let me know if I should stop or where you want me to go." He said as you felt his tongue against your core, you felt your breath hitch as he started to eat you up as if you were his favorite meal. You grabbed the sheets not knowing why it felt so good.

As he began to lick and suck your clit he thrusted his finger inside you which caused a whiny moan from you. Felix loved that reaction you had as you could feel him smile against you. "God Lixie... your finger are... their fucking... oh my god..." You moaned out, tightening against his fingers.

Hearing that he started to increase the pace of his thrusts. Which caused you to moan and squeal.

"Felix..! Fuck... wait... wait..!" You felt something in your stomach being built up. "Hmm?" He hummed in response. "My stomach... it feels funny..." You said as he smirked and began to go even faster. "You're close then baby..." He said kissing your clit.

He continued with this as you felt immense pleasure rush through your body. Once your orgasm came you felt your whole body give out as you came. Felix smirked as he felt your climax around his fingers. He pulled his fingers out, licking them in front of you.

"You taste amazing..." He said as you panted, out of breath. He then took off his pants and threw them to the floor. You looked at his bulge through his boxers. To say the least. He was endowed down there. He then pulled off his boxers to reveal his hard cock. You couldn't pull your eyes off of it. He shyly smiled at your face looking at him.

"Can I take off the rest?" He asked as you nodded. He proceeded and took off your bra and stockings. Leaving you completely naked along with him. He admired your body as he ran his fingers along your stomach. "You're so pretty..." He said kissing your breasts gently. "And this is all mine..." He said smiling. You were even more embarrassed as you covered your face. He moved your hands and kissed them. "Don't be shy, you're just such a sight for sore eyes, I can't believe I didn't see you like this sooner..." He said as you blushed even more. He chuckled at your reaction.

"Don't say things like that Felix..." You said quietly but he loved it. He kissed your neck and slowly up to your jawline until he reached your ear. "Can I put it in now..?" He whispered, sounding incredibly needy. You felt your core pulsate as you looked at him. His eyes are full of desire and lust. You felt so weak when he looked at you like that. "Just be gentle..." You requested as he kissed your cheek in response.

He positioned himself as you looked at him waiting. He smacked his hard cock against your core, feeling it hit your clit a few times earning a few whimpers. "I'm going to put it in now..." He said as you nodded. "If you feel any pain, tell me immediately. You hummed in response as he slowly thrusted inside. You felt him slowly enter inside you as you gasped at the feeling. "Only the tip is in, is it too much..?" He asked worryingly. "No... k-keep going..." You said clutching onto the sheets. He continued to thrust inside you. You felt yourself get more and more full. "Everything is in... you're doing so good baby..." He praised as he saw your eyes closed and you biting your lower lip to keep quiet. He went down to you and kissed your lips. "I won't move until it feels good for you too... so let me know when it's okay to move..." He said as you nodded.

As you guys kissed the time away he enjoyed playing with your breasts and after a while you felt yourself get used to his length. "I'm ready... you can start moving..." You said as he nodded, holding your hands to the side of your head as he began to thrust slowly and overtime getting faster and faster.

You felt so good as he kissed you and felt pleasure throughout your whole body. You didn't know that Felix was capable of making you feel this much pleasure. And just then he hit a certain spot which made you give a high pitched moan while kissing. "Right there please Lixie..! Oh god..!" You moaned as Felix listened and kept hitting that spot. You felt your body get shock waves all over from just him hitting that one spot.

You started to tighten and that's when he knew you were close. "Come on baby... show me how I make you feel..." He whined as he began to thrust even faster. After a few more thrusts you came on his cock. You scratched his back leaving deep marks. He pulled out and came on your stomach.

"Holy shit y/n you were so tight I didn't even know if I was going to be able to pull out." Felix said as you blushed and looked away. "Don't say things like that!" You said, full of embarrassment.

He smiled as he picked you up and placed you in the bath. "I'll clean up, just take a bath and once I'm done I'll join you." You smiled realizing that this will be your guys' first time bathing with each other.

After a few minutes. Felix came in with 2 towels and 2 changes of clothes as he joined you inside the bath. "I'll wash your hair, turn around." He said as he washed your hair. No wonder why his hair was so nice, the way he scrubbed your scalp could've made you fall asleep right there. He then rinsed out the soap and after you washed his hair. You guys emptied the bath water, dried yourselves, and changed for bed.

"Good night angel.." He said kissing your forehead.

"Good night lover.." You said looking into his eyes as you both slowly drifted off to sleep.

`○°.• ✿ •.°○`

He had to perform on stage within the next week. But because of the back scratches being so deep they barely healed when he came back. When he changed everyone saw them and of course not being able to see his back, he thought they healed.

"Holy crap Felix, what did you and y/n-ah do..." Changbin said, looking at Felix's back.

"That looks nasty... it looks like it hasn't healed yet..." Chan said as a very angry Jisung arose.

"I expect that you were aware of the situation you were in when or if I found out?" Jisung said with a stern tone which scared the crap out of Felix.

"Yes, yes..." Felix said as Jisung sighed.

"Just make sure she's happy and I won't come for your throat." He said walking off.

Felix's outfit barely covered the marks and when the stays saw it they went crazy.

'Good. That'll show them.' You thought.

[mayhemchicken-varneyposting]

Varney the Vampire, Chapter 2: A Conspicuous Lack Of Lizard Fashion

[Previous chapter] [Next chapter]

The other occupants of the house - two young men, their mother, and Some Guy - are awakened by a scream. They stand around talking about it for several minutes instead of taking action, but eventually conclude that By God, It Came From Flora's Chamber! We Must Investigate At Once! After Another Page Or So Of Pointless Dialogue, Of Course. And so, armed with pistols, a crowbar, and enough lines of pointless chatter to pay Rymer's rent for the week, the two young men (Henry and George) and the older gentleman (Marchdale) force the door to Flora's room. Henry rushes inside and is immediately tackled and bowled over by the vampire, who then rushes for the window. Marchdale whips out his 18th-century Glock 17 and fires on the creature; it's unclear whether the bullet connects. The vampire turns to look at them for just long enough for us to see that his face is now flushed with fresh blood; then he jumps out the window, cackling. The three men run after him; the mother, who is not named now or ever, runs into the bedroom and faints at the sight of the bloodied Flora.

They find the vampire trying and failing to jump over the garden wall, and spend several minutes watching him do this instead of doing anything to stop him. Finally, just as he manages to reach the top of the wall, Henry shoots him and he falls off the other side.

Chapter 1, for all its grammatical clumsiness, was decently engaging and fun to read. Chapter 2 rapidly introduces four new characters, gives the name of only one of them, and drops a solid wall of conversation between the four with almost no dialogue tags to distinguish them. The effect feels a bit like being dropped down an open manhole.

As Flora's line hinted in Chapter 1, Rymer has a remarkable anti-gift for writing dialogue. His plodding, stilted, meandering conversations sound like no human being who has ever lived, and frequently disregard the urgency of a situation in favor of being as wordy as possible. A small sample:

"Did you hear a scream, Harry?" asked a young man, half-dressed, as he walked into the chamber of another about his own age.

"I did—where was it?"

"God knows. I dressed myself directly."

"All is still now."

"Yes; but unless I was dreaming there was a scream."

"We could not both dream there was. Where did you think it came from?"

"It burst so suddenly upon my ears that I cannot say."

There was a tap now at the door of the room where these young men were, and a female voice said— "For God's sake, get up!"

"We are up," said both the young men, appearing.

"Did you hear anything?"

"Yes, a scream."

And on and on it goes. Boys, your sister is fucking under attack - you might want to move a LITTLE faster than this!

Eventually Mr. Marchdale, who is not their father but a family friend who is staying in their house for whatever reason, spurs the young men into action, and the three of them set to work prying open the locked door to Flora's room. Varney's feeding must be VERY loud, as they can hear it through the thick oak door:

"I hear a strange noise within," said the young man, who trembled violently.

"And so do I. What does it sound like?"

"I scarcely know; but it nearest resembles some animal eating, or sucking some liquid."

I will restrain myself from making the obvious joke.

The three men spend a few minutes forcing the door with a crowbar. Then, out of nowhere, the narration drops the following gem:

How true it is that we measure time by the events which happen within a given space of it, rather than by its actual duration.

Very ADHD of you, Rymer. I'm not about to armchair diagnose the man - I do not think this paid-by-the-line vampire story is particularly insightful of the way his mind works - but I will say that reading this story is what having unmedicated ADHD feels like. My brain, bereft of dopamine, is getting paid by the thought.

Anyway.

Henry runs into the room so fast that the candle he's holding nearly goes out; then Varney leaps at him from the bed like a cat with the zoomies and knocks the candle out of his hand, putting it out for real.

But Mr. Marchdale was a man of mature years; he had seen much of life, both in this and in foreign lands; and he, although astonished to the extent of being frightened, was much more likely to recover sooner than his younger companions, which, indeed, he did, and acted promptly enough.

Doesn't Rymer just have such a way with words.

Marchdale draws a pistol, which the narrator takes great pains to point out is a REAL gun, NOT a toy, and fires on Varney, which doesn't appear to do much except piss him off. Varney turns to him, and we see that his face is reddened with blood, and his eyes are now glowing and emitting little crackling lightning bolts. Yes, really. For a moment he seems about to pounce; then he changes his mind and leaps out the window instead.

"God help us!" ejaculated Henry.

I love reading 19th century books.

Marchdale gives chase, with Henry and George trailing behind him. At some point he manages to grab hold of Varney, tearing off a scrap of his clothing. The three of them find the vampire trying to jump over a 12-foot-high garden wall. For some reason, Varney's repeated failed attempts to jump over the wall are horrifying to them rather than comical, and they stand there watching him bound at the wall like a cat in a viral video, falling to the ground over and over again. It's not until he finally manages to reach the top of the wall that any of them think "hey wait, maybe we should try and stop him or something." At that point, Henry shoots him, and he falls down on the other side of the wall.

Next: We check back in on poor Flora.

[weebsinstash]

I got an ask this morning about you "sleeping with a married guy for $100" I deleted it because 1. Even if that was true, why should I care? And 2. They came in inbox with apparently your full name, and that shit is creepy!

I've been following you for a long time and it's fucking weird she's doing all this, like what the fuck?!

I also want to point out, this was originally a small group and one of them came forward and told me certain things, and the only way she even knows my name is that watchpoint-yandere had an old post on it from when I was like. 19 or 20 years old and I was literally homeless asking for donations to help keep me and my mom and our pets housed. Like it was an old PayPal link because you know, PayPal be like that with the IRL name deal, and i forgot to delete the post and it was found years later when she was doing her obsessive doomscrolling

The tale behind the married man thing is uh, I mean, I don't mind going into it at all. I'm embarrassed but there's really nothing to be ashamed of. I was like FRESHLY 18 and I was having significant mental health issues and I was deathly afraid we were going to be homeless and I used a sugar baby website one single time. I didn't know he was married until after it was over and I didn't really even do anything, I laid there you know? I was 18, barely older than the girl doing this actually, and he was a grown ass man and a lot of my friends think I was exploited and was put in a really horrible situation so like. The thing she's trying to slutshame me for is like the most innocuous thing honestly

I also want to like really heavily emphasize how constantly and consistently uh, what should we even call her, should we give her a nickname. So, my fangirl, yeah. Really cannot emphasize how heavily my fangirl has been trying to slut shame me while simultaneously acting like she's defending people from sexual violence. She's literally told me I "ruined my body" and no one will ever love me, which??? Are you fucking Catholic or something??? You're a 17 year old girl in 2023 with the opinions of a salt n pepper haired conservative Republican. You're literally witnessing and experiencing the overturning of roe v wade where women might have to get piss tested to cross state lines and you're preaching purity culture? I know your ass lives in a red state

[hamliet]

Hamliet, can I ask what do you think of Judas Iscariot? I just heard my mom told my little niece so she don't end up like Judas Iscariot the "Traitor". Like I think it's so sad to become doom since birth. But without his actions there would not be crucifixion, right? Now when I become an adult I felt sorry for him.

And as Christian, I'm embarrassed that my Church still support Is**el even until now because that is what the Bible said, like WTF....

Also, I'm glad when I read your meta, that I'm not the only one who think David is bisexual....

To start with, yeah. That's awful. I grew up in a church with similar views. That's a very uncritical view of Scripture, to the point where it denies the authenticity/power of other aspects of the Bible in favor of literalism (and in favor of earthly powers like nation-states, which is all too often at the root of a lot of evil done in the name of not just Christianity, but any religion). The Bible tells everyone to love thy neighbor as yourself and to welcome people. Christian nationalism is a cancer and responsible for a lot of the support for the government of Israel in the US. But that again centers power, not Christ.

For Judas... well. I'm sorry your niece got told that; unless she's threatening to sell your mom or her friends out to the state for the death penalty I don't think that's a fair accusation lol.

Putting under the cut because I'm gonna talk theology!

But to get back to Judas, it actually connects to what I said above a bit--namely, earthly powers. I think Judas was well-intentioned and tragic. When Jesus entered the gates of Jerusalem the week prior to the crucifixion, everyone was shouting "Hosanna!" and laying down olive branches because they believed he was the Messiah, whom they believed would oust the Roman Empire who had been oppressing them. And them wanting the Romans gone was, to put it mildly, very valid.

But that wasn't what Jesus came to do in the Gospels. He came to do more than they could ask or think--instead of liberating them from earthly powers of oppression and moving on to spiritual ones, he started with the spiritual first (the ones we humans cannot hope to counter). He conquered death itself. But to do that, he had to die. As humans, we can't conquer death on our own--it's a natural part of life, and yet paradoxically, everyone who has ever lost someone close to them knows how unnatural death is.

That isn't to say Jesus didn't care about the earthly powers. I think he does. But he gave people the Holy Spirit to help move earthly powers; the sad thing is that the Church has all too often joined forces with them instead of, you know, reconsidering. But power is a very appealing idea, because at the heart of power comes justification and affirmation of the ones in power.

To bring it back to Judas--I honestly think there's a very good chance he was among the people who made the assumption Jesus would liberate them from Roman rule. Actually, it's pretty clear in Scripture that most if not all the disciples thought this, which is why they didn't seem to "get" the fact that he literally told them he was going to die over and over. And so Judas took matters into his own hands and handed Jesus over, hoping that this would jumpstart the revolution. Except it didn't, and Judas regretted it.

I also think it's worth noting that almost all the disciples, including Judas, were under 20 years old. At that time if they were older than 20, they would have been married. Peter is the only disciple who is said to be married; it's also plausible Matthew was older than 20 thanks to being a tax collector. The rest almost certainly were not.

So think of Judas as being like, 17-19 here. Idealist kiddo thinking he knows best and can save the world, who has grown up under occupation and seen the abuses that causes first hand, hopes to not only be liberated (a good hope) but to be in power himself; what's wrong with taking steps to force this to happen? I think it's more than understandable why he did what he did, and thought he was justified. I don't know I'd think differently.

But he wasn't. An innocent man was crucified. Yet from that act, the world was offered resurrection, a chance at a new life. From the evil, God turned it to good. Judas, it seems, didn't stick around long enough to see that.

However, that doesn't mean that Judas is in the deepest circle of hell for ever and ever. We don't know that. There is another verse in the Bible that states that Jesus is reconciling "all things" to himself. And the word for all means all, as in everything, everywhere, every time. I've got to think that means Judas, too.

[lemonzestywrites]

writing patterns

tagged by @jeeyuns @devirnis ty lovelies!!

rules: list the first line(s) of your last 10 posted fics and see if there's a pattern!

a foundation of trust a love we cannot see

| buck/eddie, WIP, explicit, BDSM, slow burn, fwb (3/17 ch. 61k) |

Weird calls aren’t unusual in their field. That’s a simple given with their job- one that Eddie has definitely come to learn by now.

===

let me find some warmth inside this little love of mine

| buck/eddie, teen, new year’s eve, first kiss, mutual pining (4k) |

Loud and Eddie are two things that usually have a record of not mixing well. Eddie can deal with chaotic. He can deal with crazy and hectic and adrenaline seizing his body during every call.

===

the last shred of truth in the lost myth of true love

| buck/eddie, explicit, introspection, fwb, getting together (25k) |

Eddie wants to be supportive about this; really, he does.

===

the place in my heart that used to be yours

| buck/eddie, general, angst, bedside vigils, feelings realization (1.9k) |

It wasn’t supposed to happen like this.

===

temptation comes from wants we cannot yet claim

| buck/eddie, teen, angst, coma, getting together, dream (8k) |

There’s a soft feeling that gradually, from the depths of Eddie’s chest, finds itself being emerged as he’s eased awake. The slumber makes its way out of his body in a slow, methodical pull. It makes no rush to leave, allowing Eddie to enjoy the gentle serenity that the early morning still has to offer.

===

our sweet love (built on the unspoken things)

| buck/eddie, 5+1, getting together, mutual pining, non-sexual intimacy (8k) |

Eddie isn’t really sure he could really classify himself as a coffee person.

===

five more minutes

| buck/eddie, established relationship, snuggle, morning cuddles (2k) |

Eddie really wishes he could learn how to properly sleep in. To lie in bed, asleep without a care on a weekend like this, and wake up sometime past 9 o’clock. To him, ‘sleeping in’ has always been whenever he finds himself the luxury of having to wake up anytime past 5:45 am, but today, like most days, his inner body clock works against him. Even without his alarm, Eddie found himself easing out of slumber, the world around him growing more present and alert as the sleep rolled off his shoulders.

===

jadeite hearts could never cost this much

| buck/eddie, first kiss, sharing a bed, non-sexual intimacy (6k) |

If Eddie is being completely honest with himself, he has definitely thought about kissing Buck a couple of times before (maybe more than a couple if he’s being generous). He can’t exactly pinpoint when he started doing it; there’s no definitive moment that set it all off. Just one day, he had found himself staring off at Buck’s lips, transfixed on a phantom feeling that he could only dream to experience. His mind drifted, wondering what it would feel like, how soft Buck’s lips would be, where exactly he’d place his hands. It had taken an embarrassing couple of minutes before he had caught himself, only then realizing the severity of the situation and what that meant.

===

t-rex kisses

| buck/eddie, established relationship, late night conversations, non sexual intimacy (1.7k) |

Buck loves his job. Undeniably so. It’s probably one of, if not the best, things that’s ever happened to him, and he could never imagine life without it. It’s brought him so many amazing things in his life now: belonging, safety, love, a place to call home, people to call family, and in recent developments- the newfound love of his life.

===

exactly what you were looking for

| buck/eddie, domestic fluff, established relationship, marriage proposal (3k) |

Eddie is 6 years old, sitting in Adriana’s room, watching as his older sister plays with her Barbies without a care in the world, when in the smallest, most curious voice, he asks, “How do you know when you’ve found your true love?”

===

it’s super interesting to see my little habits all laid out like this! obviously i might have a preference on pov 😅 but i love doing little character introspections or even just random little factoids i later dive into- this is very fun!!

tagging- @eddiebabygirldiaz @hippolotamus @kitteneddiediaz @aroeddiediaz @wildlife4life and anyone else interested!!

[jhoneybees]

Something that really angers me is all these (mostly young) TikTokers or those on Twitter (or on here) trying to claim Elvis was a "p*do" or a "groomer" or whatever else because of his relationship to Cilla and some other girls in his life like Dixie Locke (especially since that godawful Coppola movie came out). These are the facts:

While it IS true that he did "date" some teenage girls--Dixie Locke, Sandy Martindale, Arlene Cogan, Frances Forbes, and Reeca Smith to name a few, ALL of them have insisted to this day that nothing sexual happened between him and them at that age; the most they ever did was kiss. They have all maintained he was a perfect gentleman towards them, and was extremely respectful; he never made them feel uncomfortable in any way. Even Priscilla has maintained to this day that there was no sexual activity between her and him until after they married, and there was not even any heavy petting until after she moved to Graceland permanently when she was 18, and thus an adult. (He may have also slept with Wanda Jackson when she was 17 and he was 19 or 20, but even if this did happen, she was a few months away from turning 18, and whatever happened was clearly consensual, so there you go.)

Elvis grew up during the 40s-70s. Simply put, times were different then, and you were expected to grow up fast (especially in the South); it was common for older men to date teen girls and for girls to marry young. Several even dropped out of high school to get married; I knew kids whose grandparents married at 15, 16 or 17. You cannot apply 2024 morals and standards to someone who lived more than 50 years ago. It just doesn't work.

If anything, these teen girls were the outliers; all the serious girlfriends Elvis had (with the exception of Cilla) were in their twenties or older, such as Linda Thompson, Ginger Alden, Anita Wood, and Joyce Bova.

Anyway, sorry for the rant; I just needed to get this off my chest and hopefully set the record straight. It just annoys me when this misinformation and several half-truths keep getting spread around. Let's hope this gets spread around instead. Maybe it'll finally help stop the haters in their tracks.

I'm glad that you're getting it off your chest :)

It's just that a lot of people don't take the time to do research and get the information(the right information) they're just bored, they have nothing better to do.

[jeffthekillerzblog]

Not normally a fan of Jeff x Ben , but your account looks pretty cool. How old is Ben and Jeff in your au? (Like I know some people ship weird age gaps. Idk about you tho) Just wanna know if this is a chill account or not. ;-; (/gen, I really am not trying to be rude)

AWW THANK U SM. that means a lot thank u🥹

moving onto ur question DW u don't sound rude that's a completely valid question to ask ESPECIALLY with how weird some people are with shipping. One of my other posts I posted like a little hc thing with all their ethnicities, heights, and more importantly, ages. Ben and Jeff and like a ton of the other teens slash who started off as teens in their og story are about 16-18, Ben being the youngest at 16, and Jeff is 17. Later on though they do age and like...their ages are around 18-21

ALSO want to clarify Ben does age in like all of my aus. Which there is def a reason why he ages while Sally doesn't, BUT that's super long and I'll probably go over it in another post, so to put it short Ben and Sally are 2 different types of ghosts...slash spirit things. The main difference is Sally's typa ghost cannot age, while bens typa ghost can. I KNOW THAT SOUNDS LAME or like..I'm trying to excuse it or whatever but truuust there's an explanation and I'll prob go over it soon :3

Totally fine if u personally cannot unsee Ben as a 12 year old while Jeff's like an adult, and if u wanna dni with my blog that's totally okay!!!! Ben and Jeff is a personal thing for me and has been one of my fav ships ever since I started liking creepypastas, and back then ive only ever shipped the 12 and 13 year old version of them. OBVIOUSLY they're older now but ya they're just very nostalgic.

On my blog Ben will never be seen or drawn as a 12 year old, ESPECIALLY when making ship art with him and jeff. They'll forever have a one year age gap in my au or like..close in age so dw

OK SORRY this is way too long I just used this ask as an excuse to rant about ben and jeff lol

TLDR: Ben will always ALWAYS be a year younger than Jeff in my au, so no weird age gap :3

[alloutofgoddesses]

Percy Jackson TV Thoughts

(I’m a book reader so I know things and will reference them in this)

EPISODE ONE

THE WORD FOR WORD OPENING FROM THE BOOKS!!!!! GOD I love it

(all of us the moment we see a black Pegasus) BLACKJACK!! He’s looking after Percy even as he’s a baby 🥺

The actor for young(er) Percy does such a good job at being Percy

Who let an armoured Rhino loose in the city?

THE MYTHOMAGIC CARDS

Every time I look at Mr. Brunner’s wheelchair I just think about how eventually he’s going to be #pranked by the campers changing his fake legs out for Rocky Horror inspired legs

SALLY JACKSON MOTHER OF THE YEAR 17 YEARS RUNNING

Oh Percy oh my baby someone take his suffering and give it to Octavian

Mrs. Dodds is SO GOOD I desperately wish we had more of her

He doesn’t know that he can actually write with it though

Grover and Percy exchanging the stuff in their sandwiches is such a good little detail to add in there

Walker is an incredible Percy and Aryan is an incredible Grover

I LOVE the way Mrs. Dodds transforms into her Fury self (do we know which one she is? I always forget)

Is that Rick on the other side of the headmaster? Hey dude

Grover selling out Percy is WILD like I know they had a time limit for moving the plot along but I’d be mad at him too dam

Eddie yelling at Gabe was so funny… Gabe eat more fruits you don’t know how much time you have left to do so

People saying Gabe’s awfulness have been reduced aren’t necessarily wrong but… he answers Sally’s phone which suggests some stuff. I do hope they sprinkle in some of his terribleness throughout the season though

D’Angelos you say? 👀

As my mom said, his bags were already packed

what on earth is this little Kronos dude and why is he holding a lantern. I love his voice though

Did. Did they make Percy in a bunk bed? Sally. Please tell me there’s another bed in this cabin

I do appreciate Sally TV version being more forthcoming than Sally book version

My parents Did Not laugh at the Jesus joke which is unfortunate, it’s hilarious

Percy littol baby it IS okay honey

Aryan is doing an AMAZING job of acting like an adult who’s Done This Before… it was always hard for me to remember Grover being older than Percy in the books but Aryan has made it clear from the beginning

SALLY JACKSON BAMF OF ALL TIME

The boundary looks so far away y’all how are you gonna get there

What are we swearing on guys? Certainly not a river

Sally I love you SO MUCH all mothers, current or future should be TAKING NOTES

When is Chiron going to explain Anaklusmos if Percy kept it?

The Minotaur has such soft looking ears I cannot lie to you. I would try to pet them probably

Chiron he IS the one though. Both in the way Annabeth expects him to be and not

Oh my god these end credits??? Amazing they’re incredible! And so chalk full of spoilers

Omg a little teaser at the end!

EPISODE TWO

Annabeth that’s dramatic as HELL I love you bby girl

What is that thing on the nightstand next to Percy? It looks like someone fused a hairdryer to a kettle

PERCYYYYYY

I WISHED that’s how this worked my dude

I have seen this clip on the internet before so I knew it was coming but it’s Very Funny

“But did you?” PERCY

The first and last time Percy will ever be respectful to a god

Mr. D is so goddamn funny, thank you to the casting director, the actor, and the actor’s friend’s child who told him how big of a deal this is (if you don’t know what I’m talking about, the actor went on a talk show for press)

I’ve never experienced a New York summer but how is Chiron wearing THREE layers

They’re ancient and they’re COWORKERS it’s amazing

Helpful little ‘gods make demigods do stuff they can’t’ sprinkle there good foreshadowing

These cabins are beautiful

THE HEARTH IN THE MIDDLE HI HESTIA

Not Percy thinking he’s immediately going to get bullied 🥺

YES love that we get to see a dryad and a little of Grover talking to the Cloven Council!

TRANSITIONS

They would get really squishy you’re right Grover

I can’t wait to see Mr. D do some god shit

Ope Kronos is back hey dude. Is he wearing a cloak?

Me, turning to my cat, named Hermes: You’re a FATHER?!?!

Seriously though what is Clarisse’s deal? Why bully the new kid? I have to assume it comes not only from her dad being Ares but other stuff

WHEELCHAIR!!! Disabled rep is AMAZING

Hey I’m pretty sure I won that lighter

I love that Chris is like “Yeah technically but she’s the goddess of failure” like that’s helpful but not helpful

Percy trying to talk to his mom is adorable!!! I wonder if it actually got to his mom or if someone else heard it, like Hades or Poseidon

He’s made some friends!! Oh Percy you don’t even KNOW how many friends you’re gonna make

Perseus I love you

Okay but who’s fixing the stall

Glad Annabeth got to stay dry this time

SPEAKING OF ANNABETH GOD I LOVE HER SO MUCH!! She was one of my IDOLS as a kid and now I get to experience her being a kid and watch Leah crush it

Luke you stay away from her you don’t get to call her your little sister

The forbidden kids? Different from The Big Three but I don’t hate it

Oops well I’ve been pronouncing Thalia wrong more times that I have pronounced it right

The actor for Luke, Charlie, is showing just enough subtle dislike for the gods and his life at camp that it’s only obvious if you’re looking for it. I can’t wait for people to be able to go back and see the hints being laid out

How many generations of campers did it take for the rope bridge to get full of ribbons, and do they serve any purpose

I can’t wait for the armour adjusting moment to be paralleled. Even more so, I can’t wait for the gif sets that will come out of it

I also floss if I am made to stand still. It’s a great stim, I can’t blame Percy

AND HE GETS TO PET A LITTLE CREATURE?!?! Honestly he’s living his best life

The only rule you paid attention to maybe

FIGHT CHOREO MY BELOVED

Sorry Clarisse but maybe you shouldn’t go after the new guy with unknown skill levels

ANNABETH THAT WAS SUCH A HARD SHOVE

Omg the lake, the infamous lake, the very important lake

Honestly I’m sad that 1) no hellhound 2) we don’t get to see Chiron pronounce him the Son of Poseidon? I’d like to know why they made that choice

Love that Chiron went “Congrats on the dad reveal you have to go solve his problems now”

HE IS SALLY JACKSON’S SON FUCK POSEIDON

Grover Underwood you will always be famous

Give me more immediately!! Next week I’ll be at my grandparents house with EIGHT other people, including a five year old. I’m hoping his mom will give me permission to indoctrinate him into the fandom. If not I’ll just make everyone still awake watch it after the kid goes to bed

NEXT WEEK TEASER!!! Very exciting