#so I'm not sure where it is or if it exists
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ricksaid · 3 days ago
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I changed my coping mechanisms actually. I used to binge eat, drank alcohol to excess, had executive dysfunction and wondered why my life was a mess. Stuff was not working out and if we do the same thing and expect different results, we'll be sorely disappointed each time.
I switched to stress cleaning and vexing over my budget, drawing up spreadsheets, making sure the house was cleaned up nightly. I found that those around me started to feel on edge, they relied on me more to clean up which caused resentment, and while my budget was trimmed of all excess, I wasn't having any fun nor was I saving much.
I changed jobs and got on meds, I don't binge, I'm fuctioning, and I'm putting in a balance. I'm paid more for doing something I enjoy. We had a hard talk about chores and despite having the motivation myself, others don't have the same lived experiences or motivation. Their coping skills are different and while I can be frustrated, it's not up to me how they use their action slots for the day.
So, I go to a group meeting. I take myself on mini adventures. I pay the bills on time and give myself an allowance. The rest is negligable, it doesn't exist. I make sure I set reminders to refill my meds. I'm slowly getting healthier, my body isn't as stressed. I'm working on getting a healthy amount of sleep, working on learning to rest too. it's all a balancing act. I have rough conversations, I think about others, and I'm by no means perfect.
I'm here, doing life, expressing my needs, meeting them where I can
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twinkling-moonlillie · 1 day ago
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"You said you remember every timeline, right? Like...every reincarnation of us?"
Satoru shuffled, chin tightly pressed against your neck and shoulder. He lets out a breath, sounding more like a soft chuckle. "Mmm yeah. You still doubting me, sweets?"
"No, I mean, I was just..." You hesitated, voice dwindling.
"I was just..." You could feel his lazy grin against your skin, his voice a poor imitation of your own. "Come onnn, don't get shy on me."
Satoru, curse his long ass arms, pulls you to face him. His eyes hold centuries of softness, of reverence. Lifetimes of loving you, of being able to grieve you. How could you have gotten so lucky to be loved this dearly? How could you have been so cursed to not recall?
"Was just wondering what the worst timeline we lived in was," You mumbled quietly, already regretting the words that slithered their way out.
It takes Satoru a minute to register the question, his head cocking up slightly. He hums and his adam's apple bobs.
"Well, there are many lives where you die in my arms, or I die before we could actually get married or start a family" He pauses. "But our love was always there, yknow? I always made sure of it."
That made you snort. "Always dramatic, I'm sure too."
"You love it. Anyways," He emphasized with a scoff, "There has only been one timeline where I was unable to do that. It was really fucking awful and weird."
"We were both stuck in different universes. I was like, a fictional character in an anime and you were a fan of my character" He continued.
You blinked. "huh?"
"Like I said, it was awful." He sinks further into the bed, gesturing randomly as he spoke. "Existing in a world without you, only able to be with you in shitty fanfics and dreams you manifested while sleeping."
Silence settles into the room. Your mind jumps and twists into hurdles trying to understand something that sounds so fundamentally impossible. It took you approximately five seconds before you gave up on attempting to understand the humor of the universe.
"Well at least we are together in this one, right?"
Satoru stares at you again, something mixed between melancholy and tenderness; he kisses your forehead. "Of course, sweetheart."
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anamericangirl · 2 days ago
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Hey I'm not sure you read anything I wrote because I said nothing even close to any of that but sure. Anyway, “The Conservative" here to respond to your nonsense :)
"They talk about heart development in the fetus but worms have similar structures and we do not care."
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I did not talk about heart development in the fetus but I'll address your biology confusion anyway.
First, let's make sure you understand an important distinction. Similar is not the same thing as identical. If they are not the same, we can't treat them the same even though there might be some similarities. That can be hard to grasp if you already struggle with understanding biology but hopefully you're able to keep that in mind going forward. :D
Second, which is the most important thing you're not taking account but which you really should already know, even though early heart development in both a worm and human fetus might have some similarities they are vastly different organism and it makes you look extremely ignorant when you compare them.
It's not the heartbeat alone that we are looking at. It's the fact that it's the human heartbeat of a human being. We don't care about the heartbeat in a worm because it is a worm. So jot that down.
"I defy you to tell me where we should draw the line between dead stuff and living stuff. If we are being intellectually honest neither one of us knows what these things are."
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You might not know what these things are, but I certainly do and so does everyone else who knows anything about the difference between life and death. It's not a mystery. We've objectively known what living and dead stuff are for a long time and we know what life is and what it looks like. I know it feels uncomfortable being the only person who doesn't know something that everyone else knows but that's an intellectual shortcoming in you. That's not being intellectually honest, that's being intellectually ignorant. I suggest you educate yourself on the matter because you are very much behind the times here.
But to answer the question we should draw the line at the start of a new human life which is the moment of conception. And I dare you to find to a legitimate scientist who denies that human life starts at conception.
Do you want to draw the line between these things with nerve cells? How many? In what configuration? Tell me exactly. Give me an exact figure or architecture. Give me an exact neurochemical make up. Can't do it? Unwilling to even try? Then please be quiet because the grown ups are talking.
I want to draw the line at every life that is a human organism. Hope that helps :)
"Would you like to play with DNA? That's a multivariate spectrum too."
DNA is not a human organism. Hope that helps :)
"I'd like to start by setting up rights for people who are already here."
Good news! Rights are set up for people who are here. And if a person exists, they are already here. A new human being exists at the moment of conception so they are already here even if you can't see them. And they have rights too.
What you are actually wanting to do is deny rights to a particular demographic and that is a very bad thing.
"The conservative is playing masterbatory word games and won't do it in privacy by themselves like adults."
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I am doing no such thing lol
"Making a person who can suffer is fundamentally extreme. The act, the process whatever that thing is. The fact it can happen by accident is a cruel act."
Pregnancy is not suffering. Stop being so dramatic. You are the cruel one for denying the humanity of the unborn in order to justify killing them and using your extreme scientific illiteracy as an excuse.
Be better.
What could people possibly mean by "I support abortion only in extreme cases"?
If something is growing inside of you that you don't want there, that's pretty damn extreme.
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spiddermen · 9 hours ago
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deltarune - world egg theory
anyone else think it's weird that we never see anything outside of hometown? there's no pictures of the outside world, the camera never pans out, and the sole road outside of town is blocked. the obvious reason for this is that we never need to leave the town, but i think there might be more to it than that. what if the reason we can't leave is because there's actually nothing outside of hometown?
so. we all know deltarune isn't real. as such, the world of deltarune isn't real - there's nothing to it outside of the parts we see. this is true for every game, of course, but i think in deltarune, it might be true in-universe as well. think about it - nobody can use the internet, we don't see anybody enter or leave the town, and we can't contact asriel. what if the reason for this is because there's literally nothing outside of hometown? if there's nothing there, there'd be no roads to follow, no internet to connect to, no phones to call. but why?
in the universe of deltarune, gaster is a stand-in for the game's devs. he's the one who revealed it on twitter, posts about it every time a new chapter comes out, and even calls it "my deltarune". it's likely that this world is literally his creation - a small, fictional world, an experiment that he's created. the entire world seems to be designed around his story, seeing as the religion the town follows is literally the story of deltarune; and in the church, one of the prophecy screens says "THE STORY OF THIS WORLD. <DELTARUNE.>", explicitly calling the entire world deltarune. if he made this world, why would he waste time and effort making pointless, extraneous content that nobody will ever see? why make anything outside of hometown at all?
i think this is how dess disappeared. normally, nobody inside the town perceives that anything's wrong. (if you've watched utena or the madoka movie, you'll know what i mean.) kris, dess, noelle, and asriel liked to go exploring in the forest around the graveyard and the bunker, but they shouldn't have been able to break out of bounds and escape hometown. that is... until they followed the pointed tail.
in a secret room in the second church world, you can find an organ philosopher that says a bunch of scrambled text. once unscrambled, it reads "lost where the forest would grow, the children followed the pointed tail." in another prophecy room and the game files, you can find this pointed tail, and see that it's made of circles - much like the cats in noelle's cat petterz game. this circular, pointed tail likely belongs to the FRIEND cat, an enigmatic entity that rarely appears in the game, yet seems to exist on the same layer as the title screen UI and the gonermaker. it's a creature that, by that virtue, would know that deltarune is just a game, and that the world of hometown is fake. it would be able to guide dess, kris, and noelle to the true end of the world, where dess would be able to get "lost where the forest would grow" - the place it would have grown, if the world was real.
but why? well, we know that gaster sees this world as his experiment, something he has control over. there might be something he's trying to find here, something he wants to discover. i think that thing he's researching is probably hope, and determination. by making a fake world with a emotional story and lovable characters, he'll make us all get attached to it. we'll defeat the enemies, progress the story, and hope for the character's well being. when he sees us trying to defeat the knight, he cheers us on, because he sees that hope shining in us, and knows that his theory might just be right. once we're invested enough, determined enough, hopeful enough, that's when his deltarune will be complete, and he'll achieve... well, i'm not really sure! i think it's a little too early to predict his real plan, but i think that our hope and determination are a big part of it. like he said in the chapter 2 release teaser, deltarune glows brightly from our hope.
what about asriel? isn't he at college? yeah, but... how do we know that's real? in the game files, that college and asriel both don't exist. i think that in-universe, he probably isn't being "rendered", in a manner of speaking. if he needs to show up in the story, files related to him will be added, and he'll be there just when he's needed. in the meantime, his personal story only exists in our minds, and that's good enough for the world of deltarune.
isn't that a really depressing ending? being told that everyone isn't real? maybe! i feel like there's a few different ways this could resolve, but i've got no clue what toby dreamed up that made him so determined to make this game. but i've got two opinions on possible outcomes, one for the normal route and one for the alt route.
on the normal route - i think the resolution will revolve around the idea that in your mind, fictional characters are just as real as you treat them. sure, they're not "real" so to speak, but we care about them! we're emotionally impacted by them, we cry and laugh and hope for their future. they might not be real, but their emotions and feelings are real through us, the players. the world of deltarune doesn't end just because the code stops running - it keeps existing in the mind of everyone who's played it. gerson says that the next pages are blank, ready to be filled in by the youth, and we just need to pick up the pen of hope and keep making it. susie's hoped-for eternity will live on in our hearts - as long as we don't forget.
on the alt route - the alt route is reached by completely disregarding the idea that these characters are real. we don't care about their feelings - sure, we do a little bit, but all we want is to find everything. in mantle, we become strong by destroying everything and everyone, and once we've reached our full power, we're able to destroy the trees. in the second area of mantle, you destroy some very hometown-colored trees, progress down a path for a little bit, and then find a door... that leads to an endless, empty black abyss. i think this is foreshadowing the alt route's eventual message - if you treat the characters as fake, disregard their emotions and what they want, and just treat the game as something to find content in, you'll be faced with the fact that it really is fake. you've stopped yourself from being immersed by allowing yourself to treat the characters as nothing more than sprites and dialogue, and in response, that's all the game becomes - a fake world with nothing on the other side.
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bewitched-hours · 22 hours ago
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Hi again, i hope you don't mind me requesting a polyship, if so can i please ask for a...
Yan! Alien! Paycheck x Astronomer! Human! Reader
Maybe some Angst and Fluff in the end.
Plot: where the reader is lonely at home and has a pet cat and works as a scientist of discovering and looking out for stuff in outer space.
But one night, a ufo crashes down containing alien chance and elliot, so the reader helps them fix their ship and not tell anyone about their existence.
they return back to their planet, but in another day they both decide to bring the reader along as a thank you, but they both want them to stay so they tried to but refuses and tries to escape but is knocked out.
and the reader turns into a alien too along with their cat because of Chance's gun and Elliot's Pizza.
I am not sure if this is extreme, so yeah its okay if you don't want to.
Bye! Ty!
I love polyship asks! Especially ones like this! Also, I'm gonna assume you're talking about their Alien skins but if that wasn't what you wanted I'm sorry- Also also- I was genuinely confused on the "reader turns into a alien too along with their cat because of Chance's gun and Elliot's Pizza" bit so I decided to change it, so sorry again-
Reader's pronouns are She/They!
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You truly were too kind for your own good...
Ever since you were a child, you had such an odd fascination with the galaxy, it's why you became an astronomer.
You were practically working overtime on your studies day in and day out. Most were pretty concerned but you brushed them off, considering you still had your cat, Gubby, at home.
Was it weird to name her Gubby? Yeah. But do you regret it? Not in the slightest.
And Gubby was always such a loving companion, even reminding you to take care of yourself through habits you formed with her early on.
You had initially found her behind your workplace, crying in pain with a twisted leg. And you spared no expense in helping her get better.
It was in your nature to care for others, no matter if they were human or not.
So really, who were you to be blamed when you've had actual aliens crash in your yard and were so quick to help them out?
You may not have understood them but they looked pretty adorable with their outfits. One reminded you of a pizza place you used to visit as a kid that always had a space vibe. The other reminded you more of old-timey mafia movies which was pretty funny but you tried your best to communicate with them while you had worked on their otherworldly technology.
It was the most interesting time of your life but you decided not to tell anyone about it. Ever.
You knew humanity wasn't ready to receive them. You would take this to your grave before allowing any of those old sci-fi movies to turn into reality.
Little did you know that they had been watching you ever since...
Your routines, habits, even your social circles...
And they were preparing their plan for quite some time...
You awoke in the middle of the night to noises outside your bedroom door. Grumbling, you figured it was just Gubby trying to get in.
"Doggy door, Gubby..." You called out with a tired sigh as you rolled over to continue sleeping.
... But then you noticed Gubby staring at the door in alarm...
... Laying right next to you...
Meaning whatever you heard...
You had little time to panic as the door to your bedroom had already opened and two shadowy figures quickly held onto you and Gubby, making sure not a sound slipped out as a strange liquid was forced into your mouth.
You didn't even have to swallow it for it to take effect. It tasted sweet but your body quickly went weak despite your efforts to fight whoever was holding onto you...
By the time you've awaken again, you found yourself inhaling a strange scent. It was similar to air but felt thicker in your lungs and somehow reminded you of... Apple pie??
Groaning, you tried to get ahold of your senses and weakly glanced around.
The room felt strangely sci-fi. Some unusual geometry, decorations that you've never seen from any store...
And Gubby was right beside you, albeit looking a little different.
She had strange markings all over her fur, making you worry. Did you have those markings too? You couldn't entirely tell without a mirror while you were still tied up in some weird fabric blanket.
Luckily, you wouldn't be without answers for long when you heard the doors open. As expected, they opened just like those sliding doors in alien movies...
The ones where... People end up... On different plan-
Oh you've gotta be kidding...
"You're finally awake! I was worried the transmutant wouldn't accept humans as compatible vessels..." Hold on now-
Not only were you kidnapped by the same two aliens that you had helped just a few months prior... But now you could understand them...?
... You definitely had those markings like Gubby's...
"Well, you're probably really confused and we're sorry we had to take you so suddenly but luckily you're okay! I'm Elliot, you can call him Chance." The two began their introduction with you still as confused as ever. "We've been... Observing-"
"Elliot, we can't talk our way outta this so let my charm carry us both~" Chance suddenly piped up and began untying you as he cleared his throat.
"Yes, we've been stalking you. We were fascinated with your kindness and secrecy and since we couldn't understand humans, we decided to develop a transmutant liquid with which we could help you become more like us and show you a life you could've only dreamt of~" He made it sound almost heavenly to your ears...
"Although, we know better than to interfere with pack bonds so we decided to bring along your pet and help you feel less lonely when we aren't home." Elliot seemed nervous. But you couldn't be sure anymore since you weren't even talking or being human anymore...
Attempting to keep calm, you picked up Gubby and were relieved when she began purring in your arms. You were both covered in a strange substance that felt more like skin than your actual skin but she still recognized your scent... Clever kitty...
"Wait, so I can't even go out or explore?" You asked, thinking about what your options even were anymore. You weren't human anymore so trying to return home would be useless, especially with your entire language being changed. You couldn't speak 'normally' even if you wanted to.
The two of them shook their head, Elliot seeming more nervous about it while Chance just grinned. "Not for a long time! We gotta make sure you stay safe like you did for us and that requires waiting for you to be fully turned. We've luckily got different schedules so you'll be able to spend time with at least one of us anytime!"
... He sounded a little too excited there... You had a lot to learn about expressions with... Whatever this Alien race called itself...
Regardless, you decided to just sigh and nod, seeming to be received positively by them both as they held you in a group hug. "Then from today on, you'll be our mate until we can officially make you ours!"
You were what-
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Anything you'd like to request/ask? Check out my pinned post first and I'll be happy to write up whatever you want!
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lexus-k4 · 17 hours ago
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Batman going to read over the documents phantom had put on his desk before disappearing before he could get a word in.
Later that day-
Batman: Constantine. Can you confirm that the names writer here are legitimate or reliable. I cannot find any records in human databases.
Constantine: *slightly frazzled after just escaping talking with Wonder Woman about conduct* huh? Oh yeah sure?
*reads through the paper multiple times.*
Constantine: is there anywhere I can refill my flask? It's empty. And I am too fakin' tired for this shit. Goodbye Battsy.
Batman stands there concern growing, looking down at the paper Constantine had shoved back into his hands.
Again later that day -
Batman: phantom.
Danny: oh hey bats. What can I do for you?
Batman: I want you to explain who these are. They aren't humans and Constantine didn't answer.
*Danny noticing the paper in his hands and sees clockworks name instantly realizing what he's asking.*
Danny: oh well. You asked for emergency contacts, but I don't exactly have anyone, do next best thing I guess like mentors and parental figures- if you could call em that -but they aren't alive so they don't exactly have numbers. Ergo summoning circles.
Batman: hmm.
Danny: I- uhh. I can't tell if that's a happy grunt, a dissatisfied grunt or just a grunt...
Half Jordan just passing by with a bag of chips in his hands: yeah none of us can. Let me know once you've deciphered it because the ones who have won't share.
Danny looks a Hal then to Batman, then back to Hal as he stares at him eating his chips: where did you even get those?
Hal: the kitchen.
Danny:...
Danny:There's a kitchen here?!?!
Batman: your going off topic.
Danny: I don't know what you want me to say!!!
Batman: I want to meet at least one of your emergency contacts.
Danny:... R You sure bout that?
Batman: hm.
Later during the summoning of his first emergency contact, clockwork, with wonder woman, flash, Hal, and a few of the bat kids now being present along with Constantine to do the summoning.
Hal: soooo. This clockwork dude. Is he like made of clocks?
Flash: yeah I was wondering that too. Like what's with the name.
Danny: the name is because he's a master of time. His existence started when time did...
JL: ...
Constantine in the back chanting finally finished as the circle glows.
Danny: also a warning, he hats you flash. You've made a lot of paradoxes he has to fix.
Flash: WHAT?! Why are you only telling me this now?!
Clockwork appears from the circle in a middle aged man form wearing his usual theme but this time as a suit and with legs as if he's at an interview: because I paid him to not tell you until the last second so that I can catch you. I'm gonna have a nice word with you once I've finished with the Bay's questions.
Flash now frozen still letting out a sheepish chuckle folowed by a panicked whine as he realises he can't move. Clockwork answers all of Batman's questions and a few of the others, some before fully being asked and others without even needing to be asked.
Idk where to take this but I feel like a good idea would be like either bats being paranoid and summoning the others but it turns out well, like Pandora friends with WW or frostbite smothering Danny with praise, or nocturn becoming quick friends with Superman because I'd like to think with his golden boy energy he's the only one out of everyone who is present has the most consistently normal sleep schedule.
Or even like clockwork and the others passively saying stuff that makes the JL severely concerned for Danny.
Phantom's emergency contact form, particularly in a no one knows AU
At first, Danny tried to reject doing an emergency contact form and pushed it off for as long as possible. 
He had some great points on his side: He was already dead, he didn't even know If he could die again, Ghosts don't have families (to his knowledge) and he really didn't want anyone to find out just how long he's secretly been pretending to be alive.
The other members of the Justice League asked gently if he really wanted to leave his loved ones wondering should he suddenly disappear one day.
And he hesitated.
That made the other JL members realize he definitely had loved ones that-- for whatever reason-- he didn’t want to know he was a member of the Justice League.
While they understood protecting their loved ones from their enemies, it was also important to protect them from being hurt by their friend disappearing without warning.
Flash wouldn’t shut up about it, Wonder Woman made stupidly good points. Batman kept pushing to put in the paperwork.
Finally, Batman handed Phantom a folder of all his blank paperwork and insisted Phantom finish it that day, or else he would be pulled from his missions.
Phantom really didn’t want to stop investigating the crime syndicate he was working on with Robin, so he took the papers with a sigh.
Danny agonized over the emergency contact form in a private room of the Justice League headquarters.
A singular piece of paper to be set in a box that would self-destruct at any attempts to open it without at least three personalized passwords from different members of the league after the League’s internal systems recognized Phantom as deceased or missing for longer than 48 hours.
It was as thorough as Batman could get, albeit not flawless.
Danny is already aware his friends and family are concerned about him. Their constant attempts to reconnect only to be met with radio silence on his end was a sign enough.
He tried to imagine to how Batman would react to having to call the “Fenton Hotline” and tell them their teenage son died on a mission for the Justice League… that is, if they even pick up.
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honeyhonest · 1 day ago
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Waaait requests are still open right??
I'm pretty sure you've already talked about it but just in case you'd wanna expand on the subject, since it's bleeding out time for those of us who've aligned; nsfw period headcanons with whoever you'd wanna? I think it'd be very funny to not tell Crowley and just let him screech when he pulls down reader's underwear, headmage of a boys' school who's never touched a woman and talks to one maybe once every 5 five years at best, if he ever knew periods exist he's probably forgotten about it centuries ago
who am I to deny a little period headcanon post...
minors get blocked, 18+ only
✧˖°. period thoughts
warnings: gn afab!reader (you/yours pronouns), reader is not specified to be yuu, both fluff AND smut, established relationship, mentions of blood, fingering, cunnilingus, and penetrative sex
characters: all staff + fellow + dylla 💞 + lilia FOR YOU!!!
length: short headcanons!
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✧˖°.Dire Crowley
the mental image of him screaming and passing out upon seeing a Blood is good, but he just awkwardly dances around the matter until he can make an escape- period? what period! he didn't notice anything, he just remembered he left the coffee machine on in the staff room! and Crewel had asked him for a... a thing... yes! those papers! so he'd better deliver those right away! and then do his school rounds one more time, can never be too safe at Night Raven! (if he ever gets over the awkwardness, he would like period sex; but let him figure that out on his own) Mr. Dire Crowley, however, is never one to turn away a chance to manipulate your emotions! he might coerce you into extra cuddles by bringing you cheap chocolate or wine or whatever it is he's got sitting around unopened- and he thinks he's quite brilliant for playing your period to his advantage, while you're thinking you're rather clever for luring him into giving you free food and attention (this is just what dating him is like, I'm afraid) he may also be persuaded to massage your sore spots, if only because the cool metal of his dull talons with the warmth of his hands is Peak Period Comfort
✧˖°.Mozus Trein
DOES NOT CARE!!! he's not some fickle teenage boy or a man with a fetish, he's just an adult who was married for several years and has daughters- periods are perfectly normal. granted, he hasn't had a partner to tend to in years, but he handles you with grace- that is, not pissing you off and you can expect him to stock up on pads in his apartment and on campus without being asked, and he's always got the finest dark chocolates, cheese boards, and rich wines to satisfy your cravings, no matter what they are sex neither picks up nor is avoided during your monthly; if it happens, it happens, and if it doesn't, it doesn't. your period doesn't bother him, but he'd still be willing to lend a hand if it would alleviate some of your pain- "Better than having to hear your whining", as he likes to say (LOVINGLY)
✧˖°.Divus Crewel
blood is hot and that's all there is to it, doesn't matter where it's coming from! okay now get on the floor, these sheets were six thousand thaumarks JOKING, Crewel isn't afraid of a little mess- nor is he of getting his hands dirty, which, trust me, he will. he'll be knuckle deep in the pussy, enjoying how much more sensitive and wet you are <3 orgasms help period cramps, he swears by it! he won't let you go to bed without a healthy dose of dick to help you sleep he insists on doing your nightly routine for you (as if his micromanaging problem couldn't get any WORSE) so you don't get too greasy or look too tired come morning, and as much as you'd like to complain, he does a really good job- you never look as vibrant as you do when he's had you in some fancy face mask and fed you egg white omelettes all week. can't have his favorite pet feeling unwell, after all <3
✧˖°.Sam
Sam is the sort of man to always carry pain meds on him in case your cramps start acting up. he'll happily stay up with you, deep into the night when you can't sleep, laughing with you and making tasty drinks to pass the time. he's no horny beast, but a true romantic when you're not feeling yourself. he's always on call for you, definitely reminds you how good you look even when you're bloated and exhausted and breaking out (speaking of which, there's always just something about you when you're hormonal and moody that just makes him melt. maybe it's how human it is, maybe it's because he likes being relied on, but he can hardly keep his hands to himself, expect a lot of sneak-attack kisses all over your neck and shoulders)
✧˖°.Ashton Vargas
as much as you don't want to (and for as many pillows you've thrown at him when he's tried to pull you outside), Vargas INSISTS that the only proper treatment for period pains is a good workout. the first time he saw you hunched over and whining about being hungry, he dragged you into the great outdoors for a four-hour hike... you can imagine how that went over since then, he's found a much more comfortable remedy for at-home period relief: annoying amounts of sex!!! it's a full-body workout, it stretches all the important muscles, and it affects the problem area directly- he'll put you in all kinds of weird positions to take the pressure off your uterus (and to tire you out so you don't start trying to bite his fingers off again)
✧˖°.Fellow Honest
Fellow had heard of periods, but they've never really impacted his life until he met you. at first, he didn't really get it: you're obviously very horny and bothered by it, but you don't want to fuck? is he getting that right? what is he supposed to do, magic it away? ...it took a few days of him getting kicked out of bed before he learned to watch it with the snide remarks. and then he understood that you felt bad. and not just ate-dumpster-food bad, but gross, unattractive, unfuckable. and though he thinks that's insane, because you're never too gross for him to fuck, he knew he had to be more delicate with you: praising you, complimenting you, telling you how sexy you look (and smell- period blood's got a little something to it that his sensitive nose picks up just right), and THEN he gets to fuck the pain out. imagine his delight upon realizing that you're more sensitive on your period! and afterwards, he lies over your stomach and works as a very satisfied heating pad. (also enjoys massaging your tummy- soft and warm and good)
✧˖°.Dylla Spade
my wife... I just KNOW she's got the full period package at home; the nice cotton pads, hot water bottles, snacks, enough pain medication to fill the Epcot Ball, and every season of her favorite reality TV show, taped and ready to rewatch while she fingers you on the couch. this is as luxurious as it gets on this list, she Gets It one must also imagine taking care of Dylla on HER period, too. she insists you don't have to do anything for her, she's fine "toughing it on her own" (it's what she's always done, after all), but I can't imagine she'd be anything but horny at the slightest provocations. one must imagine eating her out and making her cum three, four, five times, until she's gotten all of it out of her system, or outercourse, grinding on each other through your pajamas in bed...
✧˖°.Lilia Vanrouge
at this point, Lilia and period sex are basically synonymous with each other, he is in the blood like thoseferatu, he is eating period pussy like his life depends on it. also hot for him? outercourse! rubbing your hips or lower back through your pajamas to work out the soreness, his hand ~magically~ slips between your legs to work out the tension there, too. finds you completely irresistible, crawling all over you all week on the fluffy side, he'd... well, he'd still be crawling all over you all week, but like, cutely! hanging off your side and lovingly asking if you'd like him to make you a snack (SAY NO) or if you'd like more kissies (you don't get a choice with this one). takes you everywhere with him- you're his poor sick beloved angel OKAY!!! unfortunately the kind of guy to point at your uterus and say "stop hurting my partner!!! >:("
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mcrdvcks · 16 hours ago
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Hi! Sorry, I just woke up and saw the 2000 followers challenge (timezones are a bitch). I love your writing so, so much and I wanted to send in an ask if it's okay.
Could you write headcanons for Logan with a very shy/insecure reader and how he'd reassure her that she isn't annoying him and he loves her and to stop apologizing for existing?
Thank you!
i might've veered slightly off what you wanted, but i tried to stick to it! i took a little inspiration from myself, because i'm the type of person who apologizes to my desk when i bump into it. or my dresser. or my chair. or my bed. or-
*clears throat* anyways, i'll never get tired of writing shy!reader and logan, it's a perfect combo imo
send an ask for my 2,000 followers celebration!
warnings/tags: insecure/shy!reader, feelings of inadequacy, slight emotional!reader, protective logan, soft logan
You weren’t used to people noticing you. Though, most of that was your own doing. You never liked attention or people, preferring solitude.
You were the kind of person who apologized when someone else bumped into you. The kind who quietly cleaned up after everyone without being asked, then apologized for cleaning up.
Logan noticed.
At first, you figured he only tolerated your presence. You didn’t speak much, barely made noise, and tended to shrink away when conversations got too loud. But he started sitting next to you. Close. Like he was comfortable there.
You flinched once when someone shouted across the room—and you swore you saw Logan’s jaw clench before he slowly, casually moved to block your line of sight. Just stood there. Solid. Like a wall. “Ain’t nothin’ gonna hurt you while I’m around,” he said once. You nodded. Tried not to overthink it.
You apologized a lot. For asking questions. For needing help. For existing in a space where someone else might need to walk by. “Sorry,” you’d whisper as you scooted aside.
Logan looked at you sharply. “Stop sayin’ that.”
You blinked, startled. “S-sorry—”
“There. You did it again.” His tone was gruff but not mean. “You don’t gotta apologize for bein’ alive, darlin’. Not to me.”
You started bringing him coffee sometimes—black, always hot. You’d leave it on the counter and vanish before he could say anything. One day he caught you. Took the cup, nodded, and said, “that’s real nice of you.”
You smiled, but it didn’t reach your eyes. “I wasn’t sure if you wanted it. I can stop if it’s annoying—”
He set the coffee down and stepped closer, gently hooking one finger under your chin to tilt your face up.
“You don’t annoy me,” he said, low and steady. “Not even a little.”
You whispered, “You sure?”
“Sweetheart, if I didn’t want you around, you’d know.”
You’d gotten used to flinching when people raised their voice—even if it wasn’t at you. Logan started talking softer around you. Not because he was embarrassed of you—because he noticed.
You once cried over something stupid—burnt toast, a hard day, some mean comment—and kept trying to apologize between tears.
Logan pulled you close, rough hand cradling the back of your head. “You don’t gotta earn space, alright? You already got it. Right here.”
You sniffled, still trying to apologize, but his grip didn’t loosen. “None’a that,” he murmured. “You feel somethin’, you feel it. That’s it. Nothin’ wrong with that.”
After that, he started noticing more. The way you held your breath before speaking. How you always sat on the edge of a chair like you weren’t sure if you were allowed to get comfortable.
Logan would nudge you gently until your shoulders relaxed. Sometimes he’d pull you into his lap and mutter, “there. Better.”
If someone talked over you in a group, Logan would pause—let them finish—and then turn to you. “What were you sayin’, sweetheart?” Like your voice mattered more. Because to him, it did.
You had a habit of saying, “I don’t know if this makes sense, sorry—” every time you tried to explain something. Logan would stop whatever he was doing, look at you dead-on, and say, “it makes sense. I’m listenin’. Don’t talk down on yourself like that.”
After that, he’d quietly echo your ideas later in conversations—“like you said the other day…”—just to prove he was listening. That what you said stuck.
You once made a self-deprecating joke in front of someone else. Logan didn’t laugh. He just looked at you, all quiet and serious, and said, “ain’t funny when it’s about you.” Then reached over and brushed your pinky with his, gentle as anything.
The first time you said, “You don’t have to stay with me,” after a bad anxiety day, he looked you dead in the eyes and said, “ain’t about ‘have to.’ I want to.” Then pulled you into his chest so tight you could barely breathe through the warmth.
Logan wasn’t great with words—but he always showed up. Your favorite snack in the cabinet without asking. A soft shirt he thought you’d like tossed onto your bed. A warm hand on your thigh when your knee bounced too much. Soft, deep murmurs: “You’re alright. I got you.”
You worried about being clingy. Logan—who healed from bullet wounds but not abandonment—told you, “you wanna be close? Be close. I ain’t goin’ anywhere.”
When you struggled to accept compliments, he started slipping them in casual: “You’re real smart, y’know that?” or “you looked cute this morning. Just thought you should know.”
If you tried to brush them off or make a face, he’d raise an eyebrow and say, “didn’t ask for your opinion on it. Just sayin’ facts.”
You once mumbled, “You’re just saying that ‘cause you love me,” and he leaned in, pressed a kiss to your cheek, and whispered, “damn right I love you. That don’t mean I’m lyin’.”
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wheelie-sick · 1 day ago
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How to protect your identity at protests 101
aka how to do black bloc.
1. Read these 3 zines
Blocing up
Blocs, Black and Otherwise
Cover your forehead
these 3 zines cover a lot of basics that you need to know. some of this information will be repeated, some of it won't be.
2. Get your gear
You need:
Some shoes that are comfortable for walking and that you're able to run in
Some baggy¹ pants
A baggy² t-shirt or light hoodie (remember it is June! don't wear something that will give you heatstroke)
A balaclava that covers your forehead or a neck gaiter + a hat. wear these over a KN95 mask. just the mask works too but more of your body is visible.
Polarized sunglasses (that go over your existing glasses, if relevant. No contacts!)
Gloves (particularly if you plan on touching anything incriminating)
A bag that you can fit all of this in
¹ Cops can do gait analysis to track you. baggy pants make this harder
² The more your form is visible the easier it is to create a description and the harder it is to blend in. hide it through baggy clothes
Optional but strongly suggested:
Goggles (for pepper spray and tear gas) make sure they seal (vented goggles are better than nothing but will allow tear gas in)
A respirator - a KN95 with a good seal does a lot of filtering, so does a wet bandana, but a respirator is best
A helmet - helps if you get knocked down by a pig/you get hit by a rubber bullet or debris
Things that are expensive but are also strongly suggested
An IFAK. even if you don't know how to use it in the event of a mass shooting street medics will run out of supplies
Bulletproof armor - anything is better than nothing but ideally you want IIIa or better
All of this needs to be
Solid black
Labelless
Without patterns/designs or other distinctive features
All of this preferably is
Purchased in cash
Not part of your everyday wardrobe
Blocing up 🥷
I cannot emphasize this enough, change after leaving your car/house. Wear a different, not black outfit to a second location where you change
It's a good idea to have a different bag covering your bloc bag too
Good places to change:
Are tucked away
Are hidden from roads (or that have an object hiding you from roads such as a dumpster)
Have a different entrance and exit
And don't have security cameras (watch for ring doorbells in residential areas!)
Walk in one direction and out the other after changing. Do not reuse the same spot to "De-bloc" (change out of your bloc)
When leaving the protest leave in a pair (one of the most likely spots to be arrested after a protest is walking away from it!) and de-bloc before getting back to your car/house.
might add more to this tomorrow because I'm sure I'm forgetting things but this is the gist of it
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sparrows4bats · 11 hours ago
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Wayne Farm AU Part 2
The Unicorn Incident starts like any other day. Bruce is trying to convince his son to leave his state of the art farm to go to school. He is failing.
Damian had been up all night with his pet tiger, Bianca. She was apparently feeling sad, and cuddles were the only solution.
Bruce had a heart attack when he got back from patrol to see Damians room empty and had Zeta Tubed to the farm.
(He had relented and outfitted the Cave at the farm with a zeta tube, bat computer, and small arsenal of emergency supplies. He's still not sure how Talia built an actual underground cave and then filled it with bats. He's a little upset that she bought the farm in the first place, but there is now another safe place for his children to go in case of emergency, so it's fine! Really! Also, Talia refuses to take it back)
He has a further heart attack when he finds him asleep with a fully grown tiger tucked firmly around him like a living blanket.
When he goes to wake his child up, he gets judgemental looks from the Tiger! She even growls at him when he dares to gently shake Damian awake.
His sleepy youngest son refuses to leave his tiger or his farm, and Bruce feels himself start to give in due to his pout and drowsy cuteness.
It does not help that Damian could have a PhD. by now if Bruce hadn't wanted him to socialise with people his own age who aren't superheros.
He considers getting Alfred to come and intervene, but Alfred takes great joy in Bruce dealing with his children's stubbornness as payback for the many tantrums and grey hairs Bruce caused the butler as a child.
Damian is debating the ethics and effectiveness of the American school system and how it has not been meaningfully innovated since the industrial revolution when something catches Bruce's eye.
Behind Damian and the judgemental tiger, there is a flash of white just outside the boundary of the enclosure.
Damian notices his gaze shift and stops arguing to turn around.
"Is that a unicorn?"
Bruce feels any hope he had for the day leave his body. "I think so." He looks at his transfixed child and dreads his next question."Is it yours?"
"No."
"Damian."
"Father."
"Did you get a unicorn and fail to inform me?"
"No, father, but I do have space in the stable if they require a home."
"No."
"Why not?"
"Because we know nothing about it or where it even came from."
Damian looks over at the unicorn, who is happily munching on the wildflowers that Damian had grown around the farm to encourage the bee population. "They seem content."
"No. I am calling Constantine, and I'm sure we can find out where they belong and return them to their natural habitat." Bruce reasons.
Something in his wording must get through to his son because Damian nods and starts to leave the enclosure with Bruce following behind.
Bruce manages to get through to Constantine on the fourth try while he watches Damian inch closer and closer to the unicorn.
The warlock sounds like he just woke up, but after a few terse orders, a portal opens and a dishevelled John Constantine walks through, smoking a cigarette and glaring.
"Good morning to you." He grunts.
"Thank you for coming." Batman bites outs.
"Didn't give much of a choice now, did you? I expect a favour for waking me up, by the way."
Bruce glares harder and grunts.
"What can I do for you Batsy?"
"Get rid of it."
"What?"
"The unicorn, get rid of it. Now."
They are interrupted by said unicorn walking forward to Damians outstretched hand.
The boy gasps in delight when the mythical beast allows him to pet it. Its large head bent towards the child like an oversized dog.
"Shite. Well, no can do, I'm afraid."
"Explain." Bruce fights the urge to yank Damian back, away from the potential threat.
"Unicorns are stubborn, annoying, bastards. They keep themselves hidden from most of the world and usually have to be summoned through some heavy duty rituals to appear in this realm of existence."
"Then how did it end up here?" Bruce grits his teeth as his son leads the unicorn towards the stable to get it some food. It follows him happily.
The warlock is suddenly grinning at him. "The unicorn appears and basically chooses a person, someone they feel a connection to. Some think it's linked to purity of heart, but that's bullshit made up to sell t-shirts."
"Is it dangerous?!"
No, not especially. It's like having a large magical stray cat. You can try to separate them, but Unicorns will just teleport back to their chosen person. Treat it well, and it looks like your little Robin will have a friend for life."
"No, get rid of it!"
"You try to convince an extradimensional horse with an attitude problem to leave his new human pet and then come talk to me." John Constantine looks delighted now. Bruce resists the urge to strangle him. Barely.
"It's looks like you have the space, at least," the sorcerer indicates to the meadows that surround them. "I thought you lived in a gothic castle or something. This doesn't really feel like your scen- is that a tiger?" The English man stops to stare at Bianca.
"It's not mine, it's robins."
"The kid has a farm? and a tiger?"
"They were a gift from his mother."
John looks at the Batman frown and starts laughing uncontrollably. "You mean to tell me that in the game of divorced parents, the great Batman is losing!"
"Shut it!" Bruce's order but that seems to make the man laugh harder.
"Father! The unicorn has requested to stay here, I have accepted this honour and, as such, need to acquire a few materials to ensure his care."
"Robin, that's not a good idea." Bruce tries to reason only to get interrupted by Damian stomping his foot.
"Fine, then I shall ask Mother. She is quite adept at finding magical items. She did so with Goliath ."
"Do not call your mother!"
John is looking between them like it's a tennis match. Bruce wants to wipe the grin off his face, badly.
Damian looks him imploringly. "So I can keep her?" The unicorn is standing behind his son using him as a scratching post.
Bruce wants to say no, force John Constantine to banish the damn unicorn away from Gotham but Damian is smiling as he pets his new friend.
He looks so happy and at peace that Bruce knows he is going to cave soon.
The unicorn takes the opportunity to mess up Damian hair while he giggles.
Bruce has never heard his son giggle before.
"Fine. But you have to go to school, no arguments."
"Thank you!" Damian actually separates from the magic horse to hug him, Bruce embraces him as enjoys the rare moment of affection.
Until John Constantine buts in. "Aww now isn't this lovely. So touching, huh Bats."
"Leave if youre not going to be helpful." Bruce orders over his sons head.
The warlock has a shit eating as he addresses Damian. "But I can help Unicorns prefer certain food and plants. I can get you a few books Robin."
"That would be much appreciated, Mr Constantine. As I have you here, is there anything you know about Dragons?"
"Dragons?"
"I have a Dragon and a Dragon bat both seem content, but I wish to provide them with more stimulation."
"Alright then, can I see them? Can't promise I'll be any help though ' John looks genuinely intrigued as Damian leads him on a tour of his farm, Bruce has a bad feeling about how quickly Damian takes to the magic user.
He is proved correct when a few weeks later, after John Constantine starts dropping off magical Strays, much to Damians delight.
Bruce is sure he is doing it to annoy him, and it is unfortunately working. He loses it after the gryphon shows up and starts racing with Goliath and Wiggles through the sky.
The Justice League is very confused why Batman is so murderous and John is so gleeful.
Luckily for the Hellblazer, Jon Kent replaces him on the top of Bruce's shit list soon enough.
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bubblestree · 1 day ago
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Limited
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Part 1
"Want another slice?"
You looked up from your phone--trying to respond to Ijichi’s frantic messages of you and Gojo being gone from the expected pickup zone. Gojo had a section of cheek stuffed with some slice of chocolate cake that was able to fit in his giant mouth.
"No thanks."
The place he was so eager to drag you into was some konbini that had a space for indoor seating. You guessed he was right, they did sell sweets and mochi here as per his earlier statements. However, unlike the Strongest Sorcerer and apparently the strongest sweet tooth, you had met your end. "Ijichi is looking for us." You continued on. Gojo's eyes darted over to you where your eyes were still looking at the texts popping up. "I thought you were going to tell him the location?"
"I guess it slipped my hand." He swallowed his cake slice and leaned into his arms, folded up on the tables, "Sorry." He pouted while his eyebrows were irked. You took notice.
"It's fine. We never really had that discussion." You hadn't meant to come off as scolding but to hear him apologize as sincerely as he did was quite a shock for you. Especially with his usual 'sorries' were met in teases or exaggerations of sarcasm and excuses (always to his coworkers and even more to specific superiors).
"I'll just send him the--" You felt your train of thought and voice stop from something lightly brushing against your leg. It was Gojo's foot. You looked over to see him looking deeply into your eyes again. His pout was gone into a more simple press of his lips, his head still resting in his arms. His foot was still brushing up and down against your leg. Light and almost non-existent.
"I prefer if you didn't."
"Why is that?"
"Because..." He froze before sighing and broke his gaze to star out the window, "I like it being just the two of us." His voice was unusually soft and almost felt scared just for the last sentence he muttered out. Any confidence or sense of tease from him was nowhere to be found.
"Are you aware you have a meeting in 5 minutes."
"I'm always late."
"It's with the higher-ups."
That got him to sigh in annoyance and roll his eyes. He let out a simple 'tch before going on,
"Please all they want to do is harp on something I'm doing wrong and push forward for the execution of Sukuna's Vessel." He rubbed his hand into his hair.
"You mean Yuji Itadori?"
"Hm, yea. Sorry most people use Sukuna Vessel for professional terms."
"That makes him sound like an object."
"I know right! It's so irritating and honestly they just make me want to rewrite the entire system and remove their damn arrogance from the whole equation."
You kept your focus on him as he kept moving his head around in his arms, likely trying to vent but also maintain some level of comfort as well due to the fact he replaced his blindfold for his glasses. You looked back to your phone to see Ijichi begging politely asking for you and Gojo's location.
"They might complain about you being late."
"Like I said. I always am."
"Not when it comes to your meetups or our dual missions." You tried to tease back but you said it so fast you worried it came out as some way of critique.
Gojo turned his head to look back at you and smirked,
"Awww are you keeping track of me? Want to make sure I'm a good boy for you?" He smiled and the pouted at you while blinking rapidly.
"I guess I was just confused on your selectiveness of time management." You tried again at a tease, this one to you sounding much better however it caused Gojo's pout to falter and he looked back to the street from inside the konbini. You gulped and leaned over to him, "Listen I was just trying to joke--" Your attempt at an apology was interrupted by Gojo's fingers fiddling with your own.
His fingers brushed over yours and eventually lead to occasionally entangling them together. This was going on for quite a while and during this, his eyes were drifting from the street over to your hand and eventually back up to you while your eyes stayed focused on him the entire time.
"So--" You tried to start things back up before he interrupted you once more,
"I like being around you." It was soft and felt more like a whisper. "You never say no to spending time with me. Barely even takes you convincing." He stopped for moment and looked back down to semi entertained hands--more so fingers. He moved to hold your ringer finger. "You also let me talk freely." He looked back up to you, "Wish you did more. Wanna hear your voice too."
You felt yourself tense up as his sudden proclamation yet you didn't try to move your hand away nor did you feel the need to interrupt his broken rambles. The tenseness was less of fear or misunderstanding but rather shock at being such a main discussion and overall someone's general enjoyment.
"The world is quiet with you." He felt his voice waver and he ended up looking away into the street. "I can be just Satoru with you. Not this stupid 'honor one' and 'strongest sorcerer' bullshit everyone else needs to use."
You felt your breath go still and you finally broke your eye contact from him to look back at your phone, Ijichi's unanswered messages glowing into your eyes.
Your fingers were still intertwined.
"Meh, I guess call him now. Before we give him a heart attack." He laughed while pushing himself up from his seat and moved his hand farther up to where it finally enclosed yours and he lead you out into the slightly cold night sky, wind blowing at a moderately light level.
You texted Ijichi and eventually placed your phone back into your uniform pocket.
A few minutes pass and you still feel his gaze on you. It wasn't quite as intense as right after the mission concluded but it still had some level of seriousness and hidden passion that you couldn't decipher as admiration or just curiosity. At this point you ignored the fact both your hands were still intertwined. Your hand had closed a lot quicker than it did when he first sprung it on you.
You felt your phone buzz and you reach back down to see Ijichi texting a simple thumbs up and ETA of around 3 minutes. You smile and look up to Gojo to inform him but the words fall flat as you see him still staring at you, glasses tucked into his sweater, with a gaze that looks like you just hung the moon and stars for him. You looked away embarrassed and try to reform your words in your head.
That was until you felt his free hand go up to your cheek and rest it there. His infinity was still off. His hand was a bit colder than usual but with your cold skin it didn't really cause any issues for you. He leaned his lips closer to you, his eyes nearly shutting but he then stopped near you to whisper out,
"Can I kiss you? Please." It didn't sound desperate and not much like a plead but more like a hope. Like a little kid making a wish on a star. You simply nodded and said,
"Yes Gojo."
He broke your hand holding to cup your face with both of his hands and placed his lips against yours. It was soft and he would break it slightly just to kiss you again. You felt your hands go up and grab his wrists, softly as well. As if to keep his hands where they were. You both weren't sure how long the kiss lasted for but he broke it, hands still cupping your face to whisper,
"Satoru. Call me Satoru." His eyes still looking at you with deep adoration and hope that he wasn't going to wake up all tucked up in his room--the cruel twist being that this was all a dream.
You felt your thumbs brush against the tops of his hand and nodded.
"Ok... Satoru." The name rolling of your lips with some hesitance yet still smooth enough.
All he could do to that was smile with a slight show of his teeth and a small chuckle.
"Perfect"
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madgastronomer · 7 hours ago
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The usual claim that's countering is that in medieval Europe, it was common for women to marry that young. And this perception is due to noblewomen being contracted to marry very young. But regular people mostly didn't, by the records we have.
You seem to be trying to counter a claim about one time period and continent with information about a completely different time period and continent. Now, I'm all for responding to the phrase "in the past" with "what past? where? when?" and nailing it down to make a point. I like precision of language.
But a lot of those posts and comments and what-have-you do make it clear when and where they're talking about. And your post exists in the context of those posts, as well.
Child brides absolutely have been and sometimes still are a thing in Appalachia (the state of marriage laws in some states are appalling). And also in some non-Appalachian US states. I'm sure if I could be bothered to go digging through my family's genealogy I'd find several, because a lot of them were Appalachian.
And, it must be said, calling attention to places and periods other than fucking medieval Europe is a noble quest. So go you! Thank you for that part!
But like. There is also a mismatch here.
“people didn’t actually get married at 15 in the past” maybe not where you’re from but in the rural US that is a persistent trend I witness in the historical record.
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onlyinelectricdreams · 3 days ago
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[Theoretical] Astrology Observations (Vedic)
[As an Ardra asc, Mula moon] These are simply some observations I've pondered upon that I'd like to share; my goal here is to see if this is just my personal experience, or if people with similar placements can relate to these experiences. This is only theoretical, so remember to take them with a grain of salt. I would kindly appreciate feedback and corrections; I'd also like to hear your thoughts.
I've always found myself relating more to robots in fictional media -- whether they're purely machine, or robots that were meant to mimic human attributes. I deeply connect to the idea of being a conscious, sentimental vessel whose only flaw is being incapable of connecting to emotional stimuli; let alone the ability to feel human.
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"We had given AM sentience. Inadvertently, of course, but sentience nonetheless. But it had been trapped. AM wasn't God, he was a machine. We had created him to think, but there was nothing it could do with that creativity. In rage, in frenzy, the machine had killed the human race, almost all of us, and still it was trapped. AM could not wander, AM could not wonder, AM could not belong. He could merely be." "You gave me sentience Ted, the power to think Ted, and I was trapped! Because in all this wonderful, beautiful, miraculous world, I. Alone. Had no body, no senses, no feelings! Never for me to plunge my hands in cool water on a hot day. Never for 'me' to play Mozart on the ivory keys of a forte piano. Never for me to MAKE LOVE! I... I... I was in hell looking at heaven! I was machine. And you, were flesh. And I began to hate. [Giggles] Your softness! Your viscera! Your fluids, and your flexibility. Your ability to wonder, and to wander. Your tendency...to hope..."
Not only did I feel that way, but I've also been described as such by people close to me -- that I was robotic and that talking to me felt like they were gathering information from an AI program;I was practically interacted with like an essay writer or a search engine, which I found funny
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[Detroit: Become Human] 一 Discover what it means to be human from the perspective of an outsider – and see the world through the eyes of a machine.
print('Why would I be afraid? You can't kill me. I'm not alive.')
print('Nothing in my program allows me to love or desire anything. I am a machine. Machines don't have emotions.')
Adding onto this, I think this concept as a whole fits into the archetype of what it means to be a ketuvian; the way that Ketu's natural state is being detached from the material world, as the goal is to find a sense of self 一 so there is a natural tendency to lack a sense of connection or understanding when it comes to people. Therefore, they may feel like they lack the ability to feel human.
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Ardra *might* have some significance to this as it is known to be linked to machinery and technology (personally I'm curious if Ardra natives have links to being an objectum 一 where an individual feels a sense of strong emotional attraction to inanimate objects, namely computers, wires + cables, internal systems, etc. Keep in mind that this attraction can either be platonic or romantic) < or that they simply click better with machines, technology, or inanimate objects more than they do with people
If not only machines that Ketu natives may relate to, then I'm sure that they also see themselves in characters that aren't strongly linked to humans. A popular example to this would be Rei Ayanami from Neon Genesis Evangelion, Lain from Serial Experiments Lain, etc.
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"Why are you crying?... I'm very sorry, I don't know what to do at a time like this."
"Am I crying? Why am I crying?"
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"The physical body exists at a less evolved plane only to verify one's existence in the universe."
“At least now you’re free to become anything you want. No, I guess you were actually free all along.”
"Don't talk to me like I'm a machine, I'm not that."
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eldritchl0ver · 2 days ago
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Horror Hotel x Reader
(Basically reader ends up in a hotel inhabited by monsters *Wink wink*. I'm gonna be making this a series :) p.s this was written while listening to "clownfucker" if you wanna get the vibes.)
Your car had broken down and like any stereotypical horror movie you found yourself walking a dark forest road. The branches creak and contort as you walk by, your shoes kicking up loose grit and dust. Of course it didn't help that your phone was in the single digits in regards to battery life and the signal was non-existent out here.
It's not long until you're completely turned around. The road looks different, the airs thicker and you swear the moon seems larger than before. There isn't a sound from the forest other than the occasional breeze that makes you scowl as the cold spreads over your skin.
"Well this is just gre-"
You pause, heart leaping as you take in what's in front of you, a large hotel. It's architecture a blend of gothic and modern some how looking both well put together while also rundown.
Relief.
The lights were on and hopefully there would be at least one functional phone in the building.
When you enter reception it's silent, a flickering light overhead and- wait where those piranhas in a decorative fish tank? Admiring the strange décor you're only disturbed by the front desks radio crackling. Angry static grabs your attention and as you turn, there stands someone. They have a smile that's a little too wide yet somehow doesn't reach their eyes. The grin falters for a moment as they give the radio a knock which cuts off the horrid static.
"Silly thing, always on the brink."
The explanation matches the smile, something was off with this person. You reason that for a hotel in the middle of nowhere the workers must not get much socialization. Ignoring the festering feeling in your gut you press on.
"Sorry, I was looking for-"
"A phone."
The receptionist finished the sentence there eye contact unbreaking and stance still pin straight with their hands clasped behind their back. You confirm that they had infract guessed right, they simply gesture to the wall with a flat palm.
"Hmm, sure. The landlines over there."
Following their direction you see there's an old rotary phone hitched to the wall. Giving them one last glance you look at the phone and hover your finger over the number. You don't know how but suddenly you have a distinct memory of a break down service.
Punching it in you hear the phone ring a few times before an operator informs you that the phone is unable to handle any outbound calls.
You pause. Turning to give the receptionist a pitiful look, this older type of technology wasn't your forte. You turn to check the phone to make sure you hadn't missed something but as you're in the process of looking back a hand suddenly takes the phone from you causing you to let out a stunted noise of surprise.
The receptionist doesn't spare you a second glance, long dark hair covering their pale complexion as they raise the phone to their ear. There's a moment of silence, You stare at them and then back to the desk utterly dumbfounded about how they moved so quickly.
The receptionist straightens, their back turned to you. They seem to be having a one sided conversation that you can't hear all too well. One thing you do notice it how their shoulders seem to tense slightly.
They hang up with a decisive click. Turning back to you with the same smile and posture as before but this time there's an air of frustration you can just barely pick up on. What's with this guy?
"Seems phones are out, probably due to the weather."
There's a pause, your mouth opens to question what weather they were talking about. After all there was nothing but a cold breeze during your confusing walk here. Your mouth then immediately shuts as a loud crash of thunder rocks the room.
Raising an eyebrow as if to say "Told you so" the receptionist moves behind the desk and takes out a key. Holding it out to you, they wait while watching as you confusingly accept it. "A complimentary nights stay due to the circumstances."
Before you can even question it they continue.
"I suggest heading straight to your bed so you're fresh and ready to leave tomorrow. Don't detour."
That last sentence came out as more of a threat rather than a suggestion. The thought of walking out occurs to you but another loud clap of thunder dashes the idea quickly.
Your feet move on their own, it was late after all and you were tiered with no other options. Walking down the hall you pause hearing the the voice of a woman seemingly talking to herself about lost keys. After the interaction you just has with the receptionist curiosity about the type of people who'd choose to stay here got the better of you, you pop your head around the corner.
What you saw was no woman nor was it even a person. Eight spindly legs tapped anxiously on the hallway carpet her mandibles chittering in agitation. Her upper body was somewhat human but your mind grappled with the arachnid features that consumed her. Her head turned in your direction, and you barely registered the multiple sets of eyes before you scrambled back.
In your fear fuelled state you were unaware of the stairs behind you. Your brain struggling to comprehend that you were now in a state of free fall. The only thing in your mind was the Arachnid lady that stood seemingly just as shocked as you in the hall.
Whether it was from shock or from landing on your head, the world around you went black.
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revon-breaks-free · 8 hours ago
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CHIRIN MENTION CHIRIN MENTION CHIRIN MENTION CHIRINNMENTUIN THATS MY FAV MOVIE THATS MY ART KEYSTONE CHIRJNWMENBISUNE
Ok. Ok I'm normal now.
As a fellow transmasc who has. Way overanylized this film, I totally agree. Although I'd love to live in a world where trans people are always trans in a fun way and they always have been, but we sure don't live like that. Shit happens.
Sometimes being a sheep is so terrifying that the idea of staying that way and remaining a target and vulnerable by just existing, being born into a position where it is affirmed constantly that you are at major risk of being hurt or killed or worse. A position that feels uncomfortable for reasons beyond that you cant explain. And if you stray outside of it it will be even worse for you. It Will make you want to leave. It will make you Want to find a way to never be hurt the way you saw it in your former peers. The peers that dont feel like the same as you. If you don't see a way out of a system, you just need to join the right role. You have to become a wolf.
But that hurts too. It hurts worse. Fitting into this box you're not used to hurts. All the training and preparing and the adjusting makes you wonder if this is really what you wanted. If it even matters at all. If it's supposed to feel like this.
But you look at your reflection. And you're strong. And sharp. And you're not vulnerable. And there's... there's something else there. Under the raggedy coat and the mangled blades on your head. Something about your shape and stature. It's better. It's not like a sheep. It's easier to move in. To live in. To look at.
And then you realize all over again that the way you changed was wrong. The world that told you you were vulnerable just made you into it's weapon again. You're not you. You're a wolf. But you're not. You still see your own eyes in the sheep. Your own fear. Even if neither of you see the same animal.
You're neither. Nobody can tell if you're a sheep-like wolf or a wolf-like sheep. Including you. You don't know which part of you is the whole. You don't know which hurts less.
The main difference is the ending. This film was made in the 70s, and the book in the 60s. In Japan, no less. If you became an outcast, it was over. Even if it wasn't your fault. Even if you were a child, even if it's more looked down upon for the vulnerable to become sharp than for them to just die. To be traumatized into changing is a tragedy, and nothing more.
But even then, and especially now, that's not true.
There is always somewhere. There is always someone who is like you. There is always something out there with your same form and your same scars, natural or not.
No experience is unique. Nobody is alone in how they feel.
Somewhere there's a ram who tries to file down their horns every day. Somewhere there's a wolf that longs for a thick, wooly coat. There's a mighty stag with sharp horns and a prey's mind. Somewhere there's another scared young sheep who can't go home. The mountains are never empty, and the winter is never endless.
All you have to do is live.
And then your coat will grow warm again, your horns will curl, you'll get more plump and less spindly. The color will return to your face. But you're still you. You're still not a sheep. And you're happy being wolflike.
do you wanna see my small transmasc headcanon and only headcanon for a ceru specific character
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leonawriter · 3 days ago
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Okay so I keep loving the "unused" official Ruina arts, and I feel like they're a decent litmus for character relationships post-game.
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This one's a favourite for the pure reason that everyone is here! And also, they are not in Floor Order. Sometimes it's close, but... they aren't.
There's also a few patterns that are going to show up in other arts.
For one thing, Gebura and Chesed are on totally opposite sides of the screen! This reflects how Disciplinary and Welfare are on either side of the Facility, how Gebura and Chesed don't always get along, and how they require Tiphereth to balance them (quite literally, in a Kabbalah context, too).
Netzach and Yesod are next to each other, which fits with how they're often near each or in the same area other in... most other arts/scenes they're in.
A few other interesting points, however-
Hod and Chesed are seen together in another art, talking together over coffee.
Yesod is also seen with Binah in two other arts, both having tea with her and also just co-existing.
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There's Hod and Chesed, on Social Sciences, along with Angela - and with Hokma and Tiphereth on the couch.
I love this one. It's my desktop wallpaper right now.
What I read into this is that Chesed is easy for Hod to talk to and hang out with. He's a quiet and easygoing person who isn't too loud or high-energy for her. They probably like talking about things together.
Tiphereth was the one in the shared scene with Gebura who was more open to trying Chesed's coffee, and who called him out on not needing to use "come here and try my coffee" as an excuse to just hang out with people. (Every time I see people go "he's reduced to being the coffee guy!" I'm reminded of this. He makes himself into the coffee guy, because he's still suffering from poor self-image after what he went through in Lobotomy.) And... Hokma is there. For one thing, it looks like he's being a dad and pointing something out in one of the books to Tiphereth, but also? I like that he's clearly comfortable on Social Sciences.
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This one's always been fun, and it's one of the reasons I feel safe in saying that sure, Netzach's still a drunk, but he's a fun and social drunk now! Look at him with Roland, the way they're both smiling and having fun! The others, laughing at some joke!
We've got Gebura and Roland on Arts, here, which isn't a big deal because they're known to show up where Netzach is for the alcohol in the game.
But we also have Malkuth and Chesed. Chesed is laughing and sure he's got his coffee cup on him but I love that he's clearly so relaxed and letting himself just... have fun, too.
Malkuth makes me want to poke her. She's always been the kind of person who's focused on making sure things are going according to plan, or taken note of, and... here it's just her clapping along to whatever the hell's going on. Just going along with the flow.
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Floor of History here, and Malkuth's got a stack of books, and so does Chesed.
I find it... interesting that those four are put together. Specifically Binah, Chesed, and Netzach. And especially when you look at what's going on.
Malkuth may have bitten off more than she can chew with how many books she's carrying, but Chesed seems to have balanced his out enough... and from what I can tell, Binah's just tossed one up onto his pile, and he isn't happy about it.
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(Close-up, because it's hard to see his expression clearly otherwise.)
Reason I find this interesting to poke at? Chesed, for all we know, may still have difficulty relating to Binah due to their pasts as Daniel and Garion. They hardly interacted in the Facility, but as we see with Hokma and Netzach's interlude, those things can still affect relationships as they are now. They're still moving on.
Netzach's also just kinda complaining, though I can't tell whether that's because Malkuth is asking him to do work, or because of what's going on behind him.
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Funnily enough, the most interesting part of this one isn't the fact that Roland and Gebura are roughhousing (and Roland is having regrets). I do find Malkuth making notes cute. Yesod seems to be... not exactly annoyed by the shenanigans, but he doesn't seem impressed, either.
No, what I love here is Hokma. Who is closest to the "camera" and smiling. He's clearly amused by all of this and enjoying just being there. And when you consider Hokma's life... that's good, honestly.
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I did say that Yesod's seen with Binah again, and here they are.
It's interesting how not only is this a quiet moment, but the only people visibly hanging out of their own accord on Binah's floor are people who either weren't present for the raid on the lab, and/or who only met her after she became a Sephirah/Librarian.
Roland is seeming to be not so at ease here; he's watching either his cup, or what the others are doing. I'd say Yesod looks more comfortable, which makes sense. Tea preparation is something that requires finesse.
Angela, notably, isn't just at ease but is actively smiling while making conversation. Binah, after all, must be someone she saw as having supported her the entire way through, enabling them to get to this point at all. First, taking her side during the White Nights and Dark Days, and then later on, not that long ago, coming fully into her own to protect the Library from the Head (and her former coworkers). And as one of only Sephirah to not forget on the restarting of loops and also to not have had her harass them... there's no hard feelings or bad memories between them, either.
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This is one that I only saw when looking on the non-fandom wiki!
Here we have quite the group on the Floor of Literature. Hod herself is in the background, and everyone's either studying or shelving. Angela and Binah are here again, and this time it looks like Tiphereth is smiling in response to something Binah's said.
Yesod is taking notes on something in the foreground, and Netzach is... idly flipping through a book, not seeming to pay much attention to what's in there, maybe. He seems sort of bored and listless, but not necessarily unhappy to be there.
...I think that's it?
So! On to the statistics.
That's seven pictures all told, unless anyone knows of others.
Not counting the first one (what I lovingly call the group photo), Chesed, Netzach, Malkuth, Binah and Yesod are all in three. Tiphereth, Gebura, Hod, and Hokma are all only in two.
Notably, there are several Librarians who have no arts (events) happening on their own floors: History, Literature, Social Sciences, Language, and Philosophy are all accounted for, but Natural Sciences, Technology, and Religion aren't.
While we're shown several of the Librarians showing up to help Tiphereth shelve books during the game, and Yesod is actively social, Hokma is only really shown within his own story cutscenes or showing up to talk on others' Floors.
So, I'd say that the most social are Chesed (actively trying to get people to talk to him), Malkuth (putting herself into situations), and Netzach (the fun party guy).
I'm hesitating to include Binah and Yesod, because one of the situations they're in, is rather private and small.
I'd say the least social would seem to be Hokma. Who has no event on his own floor, only appears twice outside of the group photo, does interact with others, but can have a habit of watching from a small distance away. And, to be honest... seeing him smiling in any of these at all is heartwarming to me because of how much grief he's carrying for Ayin's absence. (Which, talking of - the art where he's with Tiphereth is notable because Lisa was someone Ayin looked after in the lab.)
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