#so I had to redeem myself with some fanart

[occudo]

So... There is this Beauty and the Beast jmart fic by the wonderful @cirrus-grey called Not quite a tale as old as time 👀

[sweetandglovelyart]

I’ve been seeing a lot of really cool Kirby gijinka designs so I thought I would try my hand at making some of my own. Here’s my take on gijinkas of Taranza and Susie.

[megadoomingir]

It has been..........

7 months.......

What has become of you, mdg? What will become of Stop Me??

As of right now I know it’s been much longer than 7 months. I’m sorry for that.

I’m an anxious person. When I started writing Stop Me, it was because I was angry. I didn’t start posting until it was over 80 chapters long. I had some recognition for my story Redeem the Stars but this was different. It was longer and became more personal. I started feeling the pressure of people wanting more. People reaching out with personal messages. Telling me how good the writing was. Telling me how it messed with them emotionally. All I could think was ‘yes, this very human and personal experience I’ve given to this character would disturb anyone’. And then the fanart happened. And someone stole full ideas and lines from my story to pass off as their own. And amongst all these internet things, I was dealing with IRL problems and people, while not realizing I was being treated poorly by said people. A lot of that has changed now but I’m struggling.

And then I remember everyone here, wanting more of my story, to see how it ends, the last episode and then the movie itself, and I feel frozen. It feels like pressure to me. Pressure to produce. Pressure for it to be good enough. I feel put under optics and on a pedestal and every time I try to step down, people tell me it’s fine, it’s ok, take my time, no worries. But that doesn’t take the pressure away.

So. What’s become of me? I’m learning every day to try to tackle the little things. I’ve surrounded myself with plants, some rare, some unique, some that just make me happy. I’m reminding myself how much magic is really in the world. I’m trying to be better, not just for other people but also myself. I opened a Kofi, after much wonderful advice and suggestions, but I’ve been afraid to post about it here. Again, because ‘what if I’m not good enough?’ as that weighs on me every day. But I’m trying. Some days there are hiccups and steps back. Other days I remember how capable and powerful I really am and that I don’t give myself enough credit. I’m ok. And I’m learning that on the days that I’m not, that’s ok, too. I’ll get through it.

And what’s become of Stop Me? Nothing. Nothing has changed. I still intend to finish it. I still think about it all the time and how I want it to be perfect. I have a personal deadline now. In 2026, it will have been 10 years. 10. Years. Since one of the best things happened to me and one of the worst. I need to finish Stop Me for me before then. I know I can do it. It will happen.

[dumbofass-homo]

Will prolly get some backlash for this buuut I had A Thought and now all of you need to hear it.

If Astarion was ugly, he would have very few fans, if any at all. Yes, reread that.

If he looked gnarly, had some odd looking scars (and not the aesthetically pleasing ones on his back), if his face was disfigured or god forbid, if he was older and had wrinkles and not a young little twink - almost none of you Astarion stans would be having him, let alone the Ascended Astarion. You wouldn't tolerate his behavior, wouldn't pursue his side quest, wouldn't think he's half as charming as you currently do.

From the fanfics, fanart and many posts I've seen - people tend to fetishize him. A lot. Also make excuses for his shitty/snarky/not redeemable traits, and I'll bet my coin purse it's because he fits the sexy vampire trope.

None of his ascended behavior would fly with you if he wasn't attractive. I imagine the people saying he "tickled the right kink" would go awfully quiet. There would be mods to make him hot. There wouldn't be half as much fanart of him. People would shit on him and his personality and probably not many would want to put up with his insecurities and grey morals.

And it makes me sad that he reiterates this point during the game. That his body is the only likeable trait he has and that's why people stick around.

I think it's time we embrace the fact that he is, in fact, a little morally grey gremlin who likes to do things that benefit him. He isn't selfless, kind for no reason or overtly affectionate. Canonically, he used to be a politician.

I do want to make it clear that this is still fiction, and by all means have your fill of the Sexy Vampire Man, but I would invite everyone who does to think a little about why they like him. For myself, I know that in reality and not in fiction, I would probably hit him in the balls over some of the things he does and approves of. His dramatics would go on my nerves and I wouldn't want him around me.

In fiction though? I love his attitude and it goes well with most of my (coincidentally also morally grey) Tavs. I love being his 'dagger-happy friend'. I love it when he hates being anyone's hero and would rather drink shitty wine and pretend he's busy than talk to anyone. I love it when you tell him you wanna be friends and he's over the moon to just have someone there. I love it when he admits him and durge would have been friends in another life.

That was a huge tangent but alas what I was trying to say is - he is an interesting character and there is so, so much more to him than his looks, which is what he was trying to say through all three acts. But somehow, that message got lost along the way to the real world.

[velvet-vox]

The insane, untapped potential of Rebecca from Murder Drones.

Hello Murder Drones Tumblr. My name is Markiplier, and I'm the fastest man alive.

To the outside world, I'm a regular Reddit user hiding in their mother's basement, but secretly, I've done nothing except consume Rebecca content for the past 72 hours, with only one objective in mind: spread the truth about this one, singular character that I didn't give a single damn about to convince you that she could have been someone important in an alternate universe.

To do so, I had to consult the classics. Rewatch the entire series again, hogging the murder drones rebecca tag, checking out her Wikipedia page (which has to be rewritten by the way, cause it sucks), create a new Rebecca centered gallery on Pinterest, and stalk the channels of her main worshippers, all in the name of my research.

Once I had collected enough data and ideas, I was finally ready.

Today, I'm going to shed light on some unknown traits and misconceptions surrounding the character, all the while showcasing all the ideas that I've gathered that would have made Rebecca a more prominent part of Uzi's and maybe even N's development.

This was by far the hardest undertaking I've ever imposed upon myself in the history of this blog. Please, enjoy the following content at your own risk and expense.

Chapter 1: The Origins.

Some context for those of you who are uninitiated in the Becca cult, Rebecca is this girl:

She's a minor side character inside of episode 3 and 4, and a background character inside of episode 2; she's infamous in the community for being a "bully" and trying to steal N from Uzi while already dating and making out with other classmates.

Despite never committing genocide and being the only member of the cheerleader trio to not have been responsible for anybody's death, she's pretty hated by the fanbase at large or plainly forgotten/dismissed, at best people just don't care about her and see her as just too unimportant to be hated, at worst they kill her in the most gruesome of ways or accuse her of racism, homophobia, eccetera (before killing her, of course).

Although pretty unpopular, she still has her own niche of fans who gather up at the table to worship her; furthermore, there are a lot of fanarts from people who don't even like her where she survived the events of Cabin Fever but is now disabled and confined to a wheelchair.

The reason behind such treatment is due to the fact that Rebecca has committed five of the worst cardinal sins a fictional character can make: being an obstacle to the most popular ship in a fandom; being mean to a fan favourite such as the main character without any clear motivation; being annoying by proxy according to other characters reactions without doing anything to disprove it, thus reinforcing the idea in the audience that you are annoying; being unimportant to the overall story without having any obvious redeeming or interesting qualities while being perceived as graving in each and everyone of your few scenes; and, of course, being a woman.

But besides all that, whose mostly common knowledge, what else is there to say about Rebecca? What are some of her less noticeable traits and characteristics that make her worth it of an analysis and a rewrite to better include her inside the plot?

Well, unfortunately, the answers are not as uplifting and as satisfying as Rebecca's stans were hoping they would be. Even in an alternative universe, I doubt she would really be as important as some of the other characters, more so an important character for Uzi's development. Maybe even N's.

But don't let this statement fool you into safety: I genuinely believe canon Rebecca is simultaneously so much better and so much worse than the community believes her to be. Rebecca is as much of a freak as Uzi, but not in her obnoxious, extroverted way, nor in Doll's sociopathic, introverted way: she's their uncommon middle ground who somehow manages to be more messed up than the both of them in certain aspects.

Chapter 2: "The quirks"

Upon commencing my research, I've quickly realised that I might be even more unnerved by Rebecca than I was with Yeva, and it's all due to the fact Rebecca facial expressions and body gestures might be the single most obtuse and undecipherable details that Liam has decided to insert into the background of his story. You probably don't understand what I'm talking about because you haven't been losing sleep at night like I did, but let me show you the pictures:

Noticing anything wrong?

Everyone else upon seeing V is immediately frozen in terror or just surprised by the Disassembly Drone presence, but Rebecca instead just looks mildly.... annoyed? Intrigued? It's hard to tell by the image's shots alone but the only time where Rebecca's facial expressions change to the shocked looks of the Worker Drones on the right is when Lizzie says her infamous line and socially excluses her from the popular kids table.

There could be more to say about Rebecca's following lines "Fine, I forgive her! Settle." and how they don't really mean what you think they mean, because, just like we are going to see in a moment, Becca really doesn't give a damn about murder, in some ways, even more than the other Workers, but I haven't found a single more compelling meaning besides, you know, Rebecca's family, which we are soon going to be talking about.

Other weird facial expressions that she does are the weird look that she has when escaping Prom, her reactions to people dying in Cabin Fevers, and probably every single scene she's in when you think about it hard enough.

She also does this weird thing with her fingers. A sign of anxiety? She looks fairly inexpressive. Yet again, she might have learned to mask her emotions and the hand gesture could be a way to let it all out without putting too much attention upon herself. But why? Is the guy standing right beside her one of her parents? More of that in a minute.

Finally, and this is the biggest point of speculation, there's a high possibility that Rebecca might have sensory issues, a possibility that we are going to treat as fact, thus explaining why she's so afraid of falling out of the boat in this scene: aside from the fact that Worker Drones are probably not waterproof judging by the text in episode 1; Rebecca is literally experiencing sensorial discomfort from the erratic movements of the boat, and even if she was able to survive in water, she wouldn't be able to swim due to her disability. (Other possible evidence of this is the squirm she emits when the door of the abandoned cabin Uzi is in slams shut. Darren also reacts to it, but in a much more normal manner).

But now you might be asking: "If she really had sensory issues making these moments where she lacks balance scarier, why did she pick up cheerleading?" Which nicely segway's us into the next part:

(Side note, I've only specifically searched for sensorial discomfort in relation to sex, and based the rest on preemptive knowledge, thus I might have messed up some parts of this analysis; I'm sorry to anyone who experiences these issues and didn't find their inclusion in this essay accurate.)

Chapter 3: Becca the 13th

In the following segment, the line between canon and fanon, reasonable and made up blurs, but I beg you to stay patient and follow my thought process: the far fetched parts are based on the elements already present in the show to make Rebecca a more interesting characther while tying her to the themes of the show and to the preexisting dynamics.

In my research to answer the question "Why did Rebecca pick up cheerleading" I looked up a site explaining all the reasons why girls decide to get into cheerleading, and I've singled out these answers as the most likely possibilities for Rebecca's interest in the sport.

Passion for the Sport: Many women who become cheerleaders have a genuine passion for cheerleading and enjoy the physical and artistic aspects of the sport. They may see cheerleading as a way to express themselves creatively and be part of a team.

Opportunities for Performance: Cheerleading provides opportunities for women to perform in front of large audiences, which can be a rewarding experience for those who enjoy being in the spotlight and entertaining others.

Team Camaraderie: Cheerleading often involves working closely with a team of other cheerleaders, which can foster a strong sense of camaraderie and friendship. Many women value the sense of community and teamwork that comes with being a cheerleader.

Scholarship Opportunities: In some cases, cheerleading can provide opportunities for women to earn scholarships for college or other educational benefits. This can be a motivating factor for women who are looking to further their education.

Personal Development: Cheerleading can help women develop valuable skills such as teamwork, communication, leadership, and time management. These skills can be beneficial in both personal and professional settings.

Love for Dance and Performance: Cheerleading often involves elements of dance and performance, which can appeal to women who have a passion for these art forms. For some women, cheerleading offers a creative outlet to express themselves through movement and choreography.

Which one of them is the most likely?

If your answer is all/some of them, then you are probably right, as there could always be more than one reason driving an individual to commit the actions that they do.

If your answer is none of them, then you must be pretty bold to make such an assumption, but you can't be blamed as it's finally time to bring up the two big elephants in the room:

These two.

Rebecca's relationship with the other cheerleaders can't be anything but toxic, it just makes sense to me: Lizzie's not afraid to throw people under the bus if it means that she gets to stay on top of the social hierarchy, with Doll being the clear exception at this point of the story due to their closeness and intimacy, making Rebecca the most direct victim of Liz and Doll the main target of Becca's jealousy; she can't act too much on her jealousy though, cause Lizzy can just cut out her wings whenever she feels like, so most likely all of the bullying that she does on Doll is subtle and only at most convenient of times. Doll probably doesn't react to Rebecca's bullying seeing as she is Lizzy's second best friend and killing her would inconvenience the cheer's squad, but if her reaction to Rebecca's speech in The Promening is anything to go by then she has at least built up a certain resentment for her throughout their time spent together.

Rebecca is kind of like Heather Duke with the personality of Heather McNamara and Veronica's shaky presence inside of the trio. No, I'm not going to diagnose Doll and Lizzy as Heathers, do that yourself.

But we're going to bring back up the DLR trio back in a moment, as the time has come to fire up the Chekhov's gun:

Remember when I said that we were going to bring up Rebecca's family later on? It's finally time.

In the same boat scene that we talked about earlier, Rebecca asks N this question: "So, my friend wants to know if you've killed her family... and are single."

In case you didn't pick up on it, this is a common tactic used to taste the waters in a relationship, when someone uses the excuse of having another friend who has a crush on you to see if you are up for dating. Naturally, the underlying message of this tactic is "I'm the one friend who I was talking to you about, I'm interested in you. Are you interested in me?" but that's not where Rebecca's sentence stops, no, before doing that Rebecca specifically asked N if he might have killed her friend's family, with the implication that she's talking about her own family.

So... Rebecca is without parents, just like Doll and she was probably left with just her dad much like Uzi. Where the differences between Rebecca and the rest of the cast starts to shine is in her reaction to the death of her parents. Where Uzi's and Doll's mood worsened after the death of one or both of their parents, Rebecca seems to be happier for it.

We can take this a step even further and assume that the possibility that N might have killed her family could be the big reason as to why she's so attracted to him, even more than the other classmates (keyword "family". It means that she could have had a brother or sister too, though I doubt it): she hated her parents, is happy with their deaths, and views N as her saviour and white knight in the dark for killing them.

If we look back at the shot from episode 2, we can come up with a couple of theories: she's probably alone at the parents teachers conference, or, and this is the most interesting alternative, the guy who stands right beside her is her dad, the weird hand gesture that she's doing with her fingers could be genuine anxiety about her dad finding out that her teacher has some bad things to say about her school performance and punishing her for it, which could also further explain why she does anything that Lizzie says if the theory that Lizzie's father is the Teacher is true.

Due to her sensory issues, it's possible that Rebecca's hatred for her family stems from a streak of physical abuse received at home and exacerbated by her already frail physique. She probably has been living alone with her dad for a while, like the girl from the 2017 It movie; so for her to hate her mom too, unless she was still alive and didn't show up to the parents/teachers conference, there are a couple of possible explanations: A, her mother died when she was too young for her to give a s##t about her; B, her mother was also just as abusive as her dad; or C, the most compelling explanation, as it parallels Khan's and Uzi's relationship: Rebecca's father uses the death of her mother as an excuse to wallop into self pity and be abusive, similarly to Khan but ten times worse, thus leading Rebecca to hate her mom even if she never knew her just by virtue of constantly hearing her name being used as justification for her dad's awfulness.

Rebecca could have, in just a couple of minutes, grown attached to N in the same way Uzi's grown attached to him throughout the course of the series: by viewing him as a sort of comfort net for the horrible things that have happened to her and as the one who saved her from her awful home life (by killing her parents).

Her dad probably did the interview right after Khan and thus implying a small space of time where he left her alone for god knows whatever reason, died to Eldritch J right before Uzi and N came in to stop her and Khan finally arrived to the crime scene, thus leading Rebecca to assume that N killed him in episode 4 and, through a connection made up by her wild immagination, her mom aswell.

So, for Rebecca, unlike Uzi and Doll, the day her parents died must have been the best day of her life; knowing how Doll lost her parents and looked pretty happy on the outside, Rebecca took this as a positive that her life could only improve; leading to the time spent between the ending of episode 2 and her death in episode 4 to be happiest period of her life, especially after episode 3 where Doll was revealed as a serial killer and went into hiding, making Rebecca the only friend Lizzie had left and solidifying her place in the social hierarchy.

When you think about it, we never see Rebecca being "happy" before episode 3, and while it could just be because we don't see enough of her, it could also really be that she was unhappy with her home life; Lizzie and Doll clearly weren't helping as despite Doll being at the bottom of the abuse trio of Lizzie and Rebecca, it's pretty clear by the framing of the show that Rebecca was always the most replaceable member of the trio, Lizzie was the master manipulator holding all of the cards of the social hierarchy thanks in part to her dad's influence, and Doll was Lizzie's irreplaceable (until V) main enforcer who at any moment could have just snapped and physically threatened Lizzie with her powers; leading Rebecca to feel constantly anxious of her every move. Plus, it must have been fairly obvious to the entire school that Doll and Lizzie had an affair going on and Rebecca wasn't part of it, therefore other students could have definitely picked up on her anxiety and started a gossip behind her back, leading her to feel even worse about herself than she already was. Which also, in turn, parallels Uzi and her feelings of being socially ostracized, making them even more of a foil to each other, with the main difference being that Uzi tried to fit in by becoming a hero to the colony and failing, while Rebecca carved her own unstable niche into society that she has to constantly struggle to maintain (Doll being at the positive end of the spectrum in this case, by being popular without struggling and willingly giving up said popularity for her revenge fantasies).

Her fear of losing the social stability and bullying immunity provided by Lizzie and Doll eventually turned into paranoia, forcing her to make up lies about dating people, like the guy "Brad" who she supposedly went to Prom with despite that apparently never being the case. To maintain the lies as truthful, she eventually benefitted from the ripple effect that those lies had created for her thanks in part to her good looks: now having the reputation of a nymph, she could get people to have sex with her, probably using it as an excuse for never actually being in a relationship with anyone (Darren is one of those people, she wasn't dating him, she was just making out with him).

There's also much to be said about the way Rebecca views sex and relationships as a whole; I'm not too sure about this talking point due to the aforementioned sensory issues that she has, but she could view sex as a sort of escapism fantasy, which also carries over in her love fantasy of N, and her relationship with the other cheerleaders as a semi functional support system, yet again other similarities with Uzi who, at the start of the series latched onto her fantasy of becoming a hero as escapism from her unfortunate school and home life, and, with a little stretching, we could say that Lizzy and Doll were to Rebecca what N and V are to Uzi, though not quite as healthy.

To ensure that Rebecca's views and actions on sex don't jive with her possibly having sensory issues, I've looked up information regarding the way people with these types of problems engage in sexual activity, and luckily for me, none of what I've found seemed to contradict any of the points I've brought up.

Here I have isolated all of the results of my research that fit Rebecca the most. Note: all of these apply to "some" individuals, not "every" individual. You don't have to check out all of these to have sensory issues regarding sex and other similar activities. I'm not a medic, so don't take any of these as gospel.

Perhaps the most obvious way that disordered sensory processing can affect sexuality is through physical touch. Some individuals may dislike hugs and embraces. Others may seek out a lot of touch or intense touch experiences.

Bright lights may agitate individuals with disordered sensory processing during intimacy. Play around to find the best lighting for you and your partner. Try using candles, soft bedside lighting, or turn off the lights completely! Avoid engaging in intimacy directly in front of a window or another uncontrollable light source.

An environment with a surplus of visual stimulation can be overwhelming and distracting. A cluttered environment can limit your partner’s ability to engage in intimacy because they are using energy to process visual inputs. For this reason, seek out clean, neutral, and minimalist spaces! In turn, assure your partner that it is okay to close their eyes during intimacy. This can help to calm their senses and allow them to focus on you, rather than the environment.

Background noises such as music, television, or roommates speaking next door may be distracting to individuals with disordered sensory processing. Find a quiet, private place to engage in intimacy. Avoid integrating music into the environment unless your partner suggests it!

Some individuals with disordered sensory processing have difficulty understanding where their head is in space; they may become disoriented or sensitive to different head positions. On the other hand, they may seek out intense vestibular sensations by engaging in extreme movements and positions. While some individuals may feel more comfortable being stable and stationary, others crave motion.

Sex is also most likely viewed as a coping mechanism for Rebecca, even if the main reason why she probably does it is to remain upon the popular girls in the school.

All of this added context makes Rebecca's death in episode 4 far more tragic, yet less random than some of the other campers. It comes as a result of one, yet fatal flaw: Her need to stay at the top of the food chain.

At this point in the story, Rebecca was getting closer to N, she could have just simply kept nurturing this relationship until it would have developed into something more genuine and mutual. It could have come to the point where eventually, once N would have chosen Uzi over her (because of course he would), she could have come to accept it and move on with her life instead of keep chasing her escapism fantasies and fawning over her parents possible murderer, maybe she would have even befriended Uzi in the process. But no. Her ego was her downfall: once N went away and could no longer satisfy her current needs, she decided to keep improving her social position, an easier thing to do now that Doll was out of the hierarchy, and proceeded to reinforce her reputation by making out with Darren, which got her accidentally killed by Uzi.

Accidentally, just like the death of her parents probably was.

Her death is almost perfect, even better than some of the others in the show: while Doll's death was brutal and heart wrenching but not really satisfying, Tessa's death mostly happened in the background and the show spent very little time on it, Alice's, Beau's, Yeva's and her husband's death depend on how you view their characters and if you think it fits, and V's death is the closest to perfect but wonky in certain aspects of its execution (just like V's arc in general), Rebecca's death is the perfect conclusion to her character.

She dies segmented, broken in pieces, part of her still lives for a couple of minutes, while the other gets eaten by what is essentially the character's foil of the one girl she was jealous of, and whose disappearance greatly benefited Rebecca. While crawling to the other campers, she must have suffered the whole time, just like she suffered her whole life before episode 2, the split of her torso represents her inability to pick up just one road, and in a meta context represents the fact that she is the middle ground between various character's situations.

It also represents the split in her life's trajectory: she was unhappy with her parents and was happy when they died, then became happy with her life and is now unhappy as she's slowly dying of a pain comparable to the one provided by her dad. All of this because of her ego.

And then lastly, as the final nail in the coffin, once she finally reaches the other students, her insides spilling out (reference to Melissa-titanium Doll's death post), everybody immediately forgets about her, just like they did with Uzi. She spent so much time climbing the social ladder, afraid and paranoid that she might tumble down and her parents would punish her for it, only for her to be immediately forgotten about once her systems shut down, still considered meaningless, tying her death also to Doll's and possibly Uzi's one, as the middle ground exploration of the theme of failure: Uzi fails but manages to achieve everything she had ever wanted, Doll fails but manages to achieve nothing, Rebecca fails but manages to achieve half.

It also ties back to Tessa as an alternate version who got freed from her parents abuse and had a chance to live a better life but still died soon afterwards because of a mistake she made.

Chapter 4: The Results

As you can see, just by using all the stuff present in the show if you squirm hard enough for it, with some added details we get a lot of utility out of Rebecca as a character:

- She develops Uzi, develops N, and develops and challenges Nuzi even more than she does in canon, but in a much more meaningful way.

- She works simultaneously as a foil to Uzi and Doll due to her benefiting from the death of her parents, and as well as a foil to Uzi and Tessa, who both had pretty bad parents but never wanted them to die.

- Her relationship with her dad also serves as a foil to Uzi's and Khan's father/daughter relationship, possibly helping to strengthen Khan's arc by showcasing a worse version of himself to the audience, rendering the reconciliation between father and daughter all the more sweeter.

- She deepens Uzi's and Doll's relationship in a different way than the Nori/Yeva parallels, by showcasing us a middle ground between the two characters that is simultaneously so much better and so much worse than the both of them.

- She also deepens the parallels between Uzi and Tessa, by showing us what could have happened if Tessa had the same sadistic tendencies of Uzi and left her parents to die intentionally (side note: Rebecca leaving her parents to die intentionally is also what could have happened in this made up canon. I doubt Rebecca finds joy in other people's suffering, but I can't help but think that she might have finally felt relief when the source of abuse in her life was finally gone), basically doubling as the middle ground between Uzi and Tessa but without their engineering skills, yet again, being so much better and so much worse than both characters.

- She serves to make Uzi more interesting by virtue of being foils but not in the obvious, narrative way of Doll, rather, in a more subtle, social way: if played right, her death could have hunted Uzi in ways the deaths of her other classmates didn't, by finally making Uzi question if she was ever in the right or if she isn't as much of a monster as Doll is.

- Further explores the themes of abuse present in the show and better ties said themes to Lizzy and Doll, who are currently lacking.

- She could have been used as a "tease" for Cyn, something that I haven't talked about until now (Uzi's and Cyn's middle ground). From what we know about Cyn, it seems like she was coded with some sort of robo neuro divergence, similar to the one that Rebecca possibly possesses; the details of Bec's story could have been reworked to parallel some of Cyn's story details, giving Uzi (and the audience) a taste of what Cyn's story or personality is like before meeting the real deal.

- She also, canonically, served to develop me.

Before I started working on this project, I never gave too much of a care about Rebecca. I didn't hate her like many people did, I actually liked her even if that liked soon turned into contempt once the serious writing for this essay actually started, but now I can confidently say that I'm a Rebecca enjoyer, the ideas that I've come up with for her are just too interesting for me to view her in the same way ever again, and I hope that this lecture might have also slightly changed your opinion of Rebecca as well.

[troublesjunkyard]

6.) Do you own any TMNT merchandise?

11.) Which version of Raphael is your favorite?

20.) Which theme song is your favorite?

26.) What is one of your favorite pieces of TMNT fan art?

31.) What is one piece of TMNT canon that you dislike/ignore?

Hello Gornack! (*^▽^)/★*☆♪

6. I've got a few items but not much. I live somewhere where merchandise is rather.....sparse. Either you have to order and pay (mostly) a lot of export fee or you need to search at conventions for some.

I had a few shirts as a child from TMNT, now I have one and (my most priced possession so far) a metal poster with the IDW cover "City at war". If it's count, I got almost every issue of the IDW comics, the TLR2:Re-Evolution comics plus the TMNT Ghostbuster crossover comic and all seasons of TMNT '12 as DVDs. Got also some self made pins and four Kandi bracelets that are color coded to the turtles.

11. Uh, tough question because I'm a total Raph fan, no matter which iteration. (Maybe because I see myself in them...) I would say '03 Raph would be my top fav, because I just adore his kind side when he helps others in need and his sassy comments. And yes, most don't like his accent, but in my defense, I heard the english version years later for the first time. I heard him mostly in my native language as kid.

'12 Raph is close behind. He redeems himself and grows over the seasons without losing his character. Also communicating with pigeons and training them commands. Nice! Addition: I just love Raphs german voice and everytime his voice actor is in other movies or series I always see Raph. :>

I like IDW Raph because of his story arc. Especially in the beginning with finding his way into his family. He cares for them, but it's hard to fit in for him in the beginning after being on his own for quite a while.

I will hear people scream now, but I also like TLR Raph even though we only see him really short. Yes, he acts reckless and yes his plan was stupid but he cares! The fear that someone else gets severely hurt of his family blinded him so much that he takes measurements in his own hands. He gave everything he had left to protect. Hothead through and through.

20. A close fight between the '87 and '12 version. I would go with the '12 opening because this was my teenager era, this song was on my mp3 player.

26. Another hard one to choose ah-

In the moment it's the TLR2:Re-Evolution fanarts from redkehlchen and shellsweet. I love the four so much! (especially Yi hehehe)

31. The ending of Splinter in TMNT '12. DAMN. That ripped out my soul. I don't dislike it, but it's really hard to accept it...

And everytime I see this damn scene I'm like "Okay get it together... don't cry..." and then Mikey says this one word, THIS. ONE. WORD. And it's over....

[gluteus-canis-familiaris]

art post . 21

the very first BoB fanart I made a long time ago was of Winnix, but I only got as far as sketching their head shapes then chickened out completely from the sheer emotions lololol

but I have now redeemed myself!!! And I made it during October so I guess (???) it counts towards Inktober/Wartober though I've never had the discipline to participate properly in either of those ever

WHOLLY inspired by the unfairly gorgeous photo of the real Dick Winters that he decided to take once he finally got home to Lancaster, the King Of Rosy Cheeks: Mr. Norman Rockwell, and the What we have heard together series by @jouissants on Ao3 (hope it's ok to tag here! if not, will remedy immediately! and instead of leaving a comment there like a normal person I just have to say that those fics have become my absolute Gold Standard for Winnix, they ruined me, they were everything I didn't know I needed in life, and this art doesn't even do justice to how incredible that entire series is ughhh it left me a blubbering mess and I've just been trying to drag anyone who will listen to read it and join my despair ever since)

my very 2nd attempt at gouache :) enjoyed every second of it but as expected, I'm still happiest with the original sketches and am now regrettably too lazy to add in the details of their patches/pins/ribbons, but since I pictured this as their immediate post-war photos, they really, really deserve to be showing off all their achievements at this point huhuhu

I had the intention of making their uniforms dark green as they are in Ep 10. There was INTENTION at some point. That's all I can say about that...

[mcfiddlestan]

Fandom Ask Game

4, 11 (Frostiron and Winteriron), 17 (Loki), 22 (Tony Stark), 25 (Bucky Barnes)

4. Is there a popular pairing you don't necessarily dislike but aren't too invested in?

Not that I can think of. There are a lot I dislike and I won't invest any time in and go so far as to block the ship name and any variants so I don't have to see art or headcanons, etc, about it. So if it's not blocked and I see it and I think the art is cool I guess that means I don't dislike it? I often share it even if it's a ship I don't necessarily involve myself in. Like I don't write for SamBucky or SamTasha, or Stony (although I've apparently blocked Stony, tho I'm not sure when that happened lol), but if I see cool art I'll share it. But yeah....there's a lot I avoid by all means.

11. What's your favorite piece of fanart?

OMG HOW CAN YOU MAKE ME CHOOSE?! I literally have more than 600 pix of fanart for FrostIron -- some made specifically for me -- and 134 of WinterFrost. Anything by @batwynn and lightonlight I love. And you'll probably laugh but this is one of my favorites for FrostIron.

As for WinterFrost...I seem to have made a lot more edits for this ship than any other LOL. But millennium-h always did the BEST edits for WF, including making those pix of Hiddles kissing someone on the rocks MUCH BETTER (sadly, they left the fandom not too long ago). And like with FI, I have a lot of faves, but this is one I really enjoyed.

and one to go along with it

17. What's a book, movie, or show you think [Loki] would like?

I think it's obvious that Loki would be all over Shakespeare and any adaptation of his works. And he'd probably critique it better than Shakespearean scholars themselves. But I think that mischievous and love of chaos side of him would probably also be really into trash reality TV. Like the Real Housewives franchise. He'd have watch parties and hours-long discussions afterwards and everyone would be shocked by how accurate his psychoanalysis is. Because if there's anything people who are used to being overlooked and ignored can do it's read other people's emotions.

22. Give us a headcanon for [Tony Stark].

Aw man. I'm terrible at headcanons! I don't even know, man. Maybe that despite all his bravado (or overconfidence to cover for his insecurity) and need to prove himself to Howard, there's still enough of Maria in him that emerges in his tendency to take "lost" souls under his wing, not even to mentor but to give them a hand? Happy (loss of his boxing career, so he gave him a job), Peter, obvs, and even Steve, who he reluctantly helped bc y'know resentment. I say that's Maria bc considering how difficult Howard as a person was, who the fuck else could see anything redeeming enough to marry and have a child with him? She had to see something under the surface, yeah?

Idk. Told you I don't do headcanons. LOL

25. What's your least favorite thing [Bucky Barnes] said or did?

Killed Tony's parents??? IDK, there isn't much I dislike about Bucky, except that they didn't let him kiss Steve! I'm honestly just glad they never included that relationship from the comic in the movies bc I despise that actress and it would've bothered me to watch her shitty flirt-acting and whatever with Sebastian. It was bad enough with Fluffalo. Ick.

Thanks for asking!!

Fandom Ask Game

[nabbit-unmasked]

(Technically update 3 on the Hazbin kin situation. This is more for my own logging/journaling though. Feel free to read or scroll on!)

Reasons I think I am/am not Vox:

• I look like him in my mind

• I feel that kin feeling when I see him and I've had that feeling for months

• I have some kind of deep connection to Valentino

• I have attachment issues that include anger, jealousy, and hatred towards anyone who might harm or take my attachment figure away from me

• I get stressed and think/say "fuck my lifeee" and then go out in the world and deal with it

• He shuts down when the world and his emotions become too much

• I don't feel a connection to tech (one of the biggest reasons why I'm feeling weird abt it)

• I wouldn't be so heartlessly cruel to others (unless they were working with the person I hate, see attachment issues)

• I feel positively about alastor, sir pentious, and everyone else that's redeemed

• I don't feel like I'm looking in a mirror when I see him (but I don't exactly feel that with Moisty [my confirmed fictkin] either)

• My connection to Valentino might actually be that I'm kin of him instead (I'll feel incredibly guilty if that's the case)

And for Adam...:

• I look just like him/his kind in my mind

• Immediately had that kin feeling when I first saw him, and that was in colorless fanart.

• I'm into punk rock and being punk is a huge part of my identity

• I swear a lot which is also (somewhat) part of my punk identity

• I feel a large connection to whites and golds (though I've determined this is because of my other kintype, a Lipizzan)

• I dont have it in me be to be so cruel to everyone (biggest reason)

• I feel generally positive about Charlie and her crew

• His outfit isnt quite right in shape

• I don't feel a connection to angels or heaven

• His mask/the angels masks would be my actual head, not a cover up.

• I feel zero connection to the adam and eve story

And lastly, for Sir Pentious:

• I saw him and immediately had that kin feeling (same with adam)

• I panic easily in social settings

• I love my dog like my baby and I like protecting people younger than me

• It felt right to go by "Sir Pentious" and I have a connection to his name

• I feel generally positive about Charlie and her crew (stolen from Adam's, but this time its in green)

• Absolutely hopeless romantic

• Again, I just look and somewhat feel like him.

• I don't feel like a snake

• I don't like girls (with very few exceptions)

• I cant easily see myself in his shoes (I am autistic tho)

• I don't actually have many nots...

Thanks for sticking around if you did. Have a free Voxtech tv!

+1 🖥

[chill-vibes-but-rainbow-panic]

7, 8, and 11 from the thingy that you rb earlier

:))

OG List

(I apologize in advance for the long answers, I just love answering stuff like that and I have a lot to say :] )

7. Your favourite tropes to read/write/draw

(I love them all the same, but it is slightly different for each, so I'm making a destinction)

Read: Honestly, kidnapping. I love characters getting kidnapped, and their loved ones worrying/rescuing them. This also includes more-or-less any type of 'going missing'-plot (incl. Char A just running away themselves). Just the feeling of "I have no idea where or how they are, and if they're even still alive", and then the relief when they meet again. Hmmm

Write: 'The world has been cruel and hard to you - therefore I won't be. I want to show you the beauty it has to offer, too <3' This is the best way I can describe it. Characters who've just had a rough time/life being unconditionally cared for and supported. Getting everything their heart has desired for so long. Short: Hurt/Comfort

Draw: While I have yet to draw this myself, actually (because humanoids are hard), any drawing of one character being hurt or scared, while another stands over them caringly and protectively - obviously willing to kick some ass if needed - has me go wild.

8. You hope more people will come to appreciate ___ (a ship, a trope, an episode, etc)

I understand that some people find the market oversaturated by now - that's valid - but still: Redemption

I love redemption so much. I want the story to gently cup a character's face and say "You are broken, but not beyond repair. You can get better, and be happy, and be surrounded by people you love and that love you back." They don't even necessarily need trauma or have gone down a super dark path, I also enjoy: "Character is a massive jerk, and we follow them down the road of being less of a jerk". These are honestly the main reasons both the 'Good Uncle Sly' and 'Apple Cousins' AUs exist.

There are few exceptions I can think of, of villains I'm personally obsessed with, and have not made a version of, where they are redeemed. I look at Reginald Bushroot, and Camille Chameleon, and the Dark Curse - and while for some more than others - there will usually be something at the back of my mind asking: "What if you didn't have to? What if you found love? What if you got to live a quiet, gentle life? What if one day you realized you live in a reality you would never have imagined come true? In a good way? What if everyone could be okay?"

Just

Redemption

11. If you're a writer or artist, what fic or piece of art are you proud of making?

Fic: Family Discount

I was honestly surprised how many people liked that fic. Between 11 fics in total, this one definitely has some of my favourite comments (and it also has a surprsing amount of comments, I didn't expect that tbh). I was a little worried about posting a fanfic chapter-by-chapter, because the last time I tried that I basically (though not officially yet) stopped after one, because I can't write slice of life, it seems.

But so many people got emotionally invested in my writing, and I honestly didn't expect that? But even though I'm forced to take a semi-long break (for exam reasons), it is extremely motivating, and makes me feel that (as vague as it sounds), my stories do do something. How much joy the stuff you make can bring other people, is honestly so cool. Even if it's just a little fanart, or an ask, or a slightly-self-indulgent fanfic :)

I'm proud of having actually got this far, and also having written something me and other people love to read

Art:

I'm actually a little embarassed of this drawing, which I know sounds counter-intuitive to the prompt, but I swear, there is a reason it's here!

This is my first, and currently only drawing of the Flim-Flam-Brothers

I had basically no idea what I was going to do with their designs, and I also only had 60min, with limited tools (because Colormari)

But the thing about this drawing, was that our prompt was basically just "New Years Resolutions". And mine was that I wanted to create more art, without getting bossed around by my inner sense of cringe. Because, while I have absolutely no problem with ranting and rambling and talking about my favourite characters all over the place; as soon as I want to put them into any form of art, my organs feel like they'll turn me inside out. It's the reason this blog has dozens of rambles about how much I love Darkwing Duck, and yet zero art of any of its characters (made by me).

But I made this - and kept it around - even though I knew the characters wouldn't look the best.

So this is the drawing I'm most proud of, because it actually exists :)

[creoterative]

The Way I got into the TWDG Fandom

It’s quite funny actually. 

Because I’ve watched scenes of it since I was 16 years old - and I had no idea I did. I saw Lee’s death scene, I saw the scene with the starved zombie boy with Lee and Kenny, I saw the scene where the cannibals are exposed. 

And I had no idea that it was The Walking Dead, because I am a fucking idiot.

You know, who got me into the fandom? 

That’s right. 

Marlon’s ugly mullet ass did. 

And the reason is just as dumb as me not realizing what I was watching there from time to time. 

As a kid, I often watched some german movies about a group of kids, that played soccer together and battled other groups of kids (later adults). And one of the main characters happened to be called Marlon. Funny side fact, he turns out to be a traitor afterwards, but is redeemed, that lucky bastard. 

Nowadays, watching these movies makes me kinda cringe, because, well, they’re for kids, and they’re old... BUT the name Marlon is actually one of my favorite names because of this, among several others like John, Jack, Leon, the list goes on.

Anyway, by some lucky coincidence, the video of Marlon’s death popped up in my recomendations and the only thing that drew me to it was his name, just his name. I didn’t understand a thing that happened there, but the pure mention of a guy named Marlon brought nostalgia and well, several months later, here I am, writing stories and drawing fanart. 

Just wanted to share this little story because it makes absolutely no sense and is just so weird, that I’d like to bury myself for mentioning these old movies xD

PS: I will NOT say which movies I watched there, figure it out xDDD

[lilmerh]

for the choose violence ask game:

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about 

12. the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them

Already answered 12, so I'll just do 8. It's been a while since I watched/read these things, so my memory is a bit rusty :/

[The Owl House]

-That Evelyn & Caleb are all that interesting lol. They practically took over the fandom (/hyperbole) when those portraits of them were showed, but I've never once found them that fun to think about. I don't know what it is that's grabbing other people and not me, but I just have zero thoughts about these people.

At least Belos is a fun character, so some fanart exploring him and Caleb's relationship is enjoyable, but other than his relation to Belos, IDC about Caleb. I care about Evelyn even less, and never cared about her being a Clawthorne either.

We got like, 2 minutes max of screentime of these guys, and 90% of it is just photos of them. We didn't even get to know them as characters. There's barely anything to talk about with them

-I don't think everyone is wrong about this (so doesn't really belong on this question?), but that Amity &/or Hunter are autistic. I don't necessarily disagree with this opinion, I just never picked up on that myself. I've seen people call them "autism coded" and I'm like "...where?" If I went looking for posts abt it, I'm sure I could get on board w/ it though

-Any romantic ship with Willow bc that girl is aromantic (Dana told me herself /j)

[Nevermoor]

That Ezra Squall is in any way good or redeemable. This is a divisive opinion in the fandom itself, so not "everyone", but as it stands in the series, I am nottt on board with this yet. If that's the direction Jess wants to take the story, I trust her to do a good job with it, but from what we've been presented of Ezra so far, I don't think he is good nor will become good.

I found the split between "Ezra the boy" and "Ezra the monster" and if those lines blur pretty fun to read, and I'm curious to find out if he has any motivations for the massacre (or any of the other stuff he did) besides power hunger. If it turns out he's just been unfairly villianized, manipulated, or just misunderstood, it'd have to be really well written or I'd be disappointed lol. I simply find him more fun as a villian

[The Walking Dead]

Prolly weird to bring this up out of nowhere, since I don't think I've ever spoken about it on Tumblr, but I am indeed a TWD fan.

Shane is a bitch ass motherfucker and not remotely fun to watch. Every second he's on screen he's nothing but a pain in the ass. I love Rick, so whenever he and Rick are arguing (which is constantly), I just want him to SHUTTT UPPPPPP. He keeps wanting to control the group in ways I hated, and is a bit too content with killing people to meet the ends. (For example, when he shoots a guy he's out on a supply run with JUST so the zombies will stop and eat him and let Shane run away?? He could'a just shot them when he'd gotten back on the bus, but nah, he had to kill his companion and wasn't even honest about it to the rest of the group.)

Some people say Rick is like this too, but he doesn't truly get murderous until several seasons of being the leader of a survivor group in a zombie apocalypse. And whenever he gets content with killing people, it's not framed as a good thing, it's a consequence of the stress, hurt, and lack of trust that builds up in the apocalypse. Rick is at his best when he's extending a hand to other survivors. Shane didn't even make it past S2 before being okay with unnecessary killing.

(Do note that sometimes, Rick killing people is a good thing. For example, when a group of men attacked the fam and one man attempted to rape Rick's son, to which he proceeded to rip out one man's throat with his teeth. That was quite cool of him.)

People who like Shane tend to also be unfairly judgemental of Lori, in my experience. Either because she started a relationship with him while being married or because she later wanted to end that relationship.

She started a relationship with him because she believed her husband was dead. Shane was even the one who told her he was. In her eyes, she was single again. It's fine of her to have sex with any other man at this point, and to slowly start viewing him as family, even letting him get close to her son.

When her thought-to-be-dead husband waltzes up to the survivor group, very much alive, though, it's reasonable she would want to be in a relationship with her husband again. It is also reasonable that she doesn't want her apocalypse fling to be a father figure to her son when his actual father turned out to be alive. She isn't unreasonable for ending the relationship with Shane, nor for not wanting him to act as Carl's father anymore. Shane doesn't have any right to act as the father to her son.

There may be other reasons to criticise her (she died pretty early on and I haven't seen TWD in a while so IDK) but if anyone criticizes her for either of these reasons they r wrong <3

Conclusion: Shane was an infuriating character and I'm glad he died

[bilbobagginsomebabez]

oh this is fun. i'd been avoiding any mention of it for years too because of the Discourse Hell surrounding it and at this point I'm mostly convinced that Vvienne Mdrano is a Messy Person on the Discourse Website with a cringey artistic fixation. it's all tumblr drama.

watched the show myself first, didn't find it objectionable, and then went looking for what everybody was so mad about. I found this Mary Sue article about it then cruised around the hzbin hate tags. the primary issues floating around with hzbin htel are:

all the gay characters are in hell which they say implies gay people deserve to be in hell. [dismissed based on the premise of the show, which is that heaven's rules for paradise are arbitrary and people in hell are still good/redeemable]

Angel and p much everything about them. most of these complaints are about good/bad representation (off to a great start lmao) and whether it's offensive that Angel is an addict who likes sex but is still exploited. just every ounce of sex work discourse possible transposed onto a fictional character. [from what i've seen, actual sex workers seem to like Angel Dust just fine, so again whatever imo.]

Medran0 has had a tumblr blog for the entire development history and on that blog did a few major things that really pissed people off.

[1] origin of the sexual predator stuff. she drew one of her own characters in a SFW but sexy pose with a snake. bad because the character was a minor. apparently the fan wiki says the character is 18. also drew a student/teacher relationship. [personally i just do not give a fuck about any of it.]

[2] origin of transphobia. she drew fanart of blair white after trump was elected. that whole bit is genuinely batshit. said she had a mental breakdown and convinced herself she didn't understand politics and needed to hear other perspectives. started watching blair white, thought she was pretty, and drew her. [i don't like this and think it's deeply bizarre but i also find it hilarious and existentially fitting that she describes her temporary appreciation of blair white as a serious mental breakdown and the worst time of her life. she has apologized and hasn't done anything like it since. mostly i see why her creative fixation is a show about redeeming people who are genuinely fucked in the head and do bad things in that headspace. and i also see why this did not end her career as many people on the webbed site seem to wish it did.]

[3] plagiarism stuff.

(a) she traced designs from larger projects and posted them. didn't make money off them and the things that appear in any Produced Work are pretty boilerplate animation homages. [imo this complaint is mostly the lingering effect of 15 yr olds not knowing how anything works]

(b) bought some character designs off of an artist/ex-friend and then the relationship soured. contract didn't require credit after she bought them so she removed the name of the ex-friend from her stuff. ex-friend tried to launch a lawsuit about it which was summarily dismissed and she stopped using the character design. medran0 alleges the friend was abusive. [i dont have an opinion on this and won't be forming one.]

4. pure cringe.

this is something my friend said and it's the epitome of it. most accurate comment on the show i've seen so far. it's a show that's directed STRAIGHT at those exact same depressed teens except they're adults now with different, bigger problems and still hoping it will get better. the humor and the themes are aged up, but not the emotional core or aesthetic. and i think that's fair. it hasn't gotten better for everyone and while I'm not in that place anymore and it doesn't Hit Me In My Feels, i get why it does for others.

Okay I don’t know anything about h*zbin h*tel but hasn’t it been in the works for like 8 years? Isn’t the creator like some kind of sexual predator apologist or something? Literally what’s going on?

[depressed-avocado]

||SAKUATSU AND THE JAPANESE MEDIA||

have you all noticed how we have an abundance of sakuatsu fics, fanart and stans in the western media but very few and rare doujins served by the japanese side of the fandom?

even the sporadic content we see has a very different take on sakuatsu than we do..

now, take myself as a referance. i entered the fandom with a vengeance against all but suga, avoided sakuatsu and kagehina like it was the COVID epicenter itself but a year and a half later ended up reading one teeny fanfic on ao3 out of dire curiousity and ended up with sakuatsu as my adopted babies.

there was a lot of discussion on this ship on twt, tumblr and the like, but when i searched up for doujins to satisfy my horny hunger, i found none?

the very few and far between were actually AtsuSaku (top atsumu, still not much common with the english speaking world) and SakuOsa (poor atsumu 🤣) and featured sakusa as a very grumpy, tsundere, devil-may-care lover whom atsumu had to ask permission just to kiss. compare THAT to how the western fandom potrays him as the blunt jerk who is nefariously down bad for atsumu, but is still kinda loveable and chaotic in his own steed.

the thing is, sakuatsu is a rare ship. there are hardly 5 panels on interaction for them in the manga, and still quite less info on sakusa available, which gives the people the opportunity to mould him into any shape they want. atsumu has more chemistry with hinata, aran, kita, suna, hell you'd even find more miyacest content in japan than sakuatsu. it all started out as a crack ship, something similar to matsuhana, and exploded exponentially in a span of few weeks like it was set on fire. honestly, covid-19 would be jealous.

in the year 2020, the world recieved so many beautiful fanfics, maybe some of the best in the fandom. the same teenagers once raving after kagehina and iwaoi were now adults and have had enough of bubbly, tooth rotting fluff and circumstancal angst.

iwaoi's biggest potential for angst is them seperating for college, same as bokuaka and kuroken. maybe an external factor causing a rift in the couple. very basic.

they wanted something dynamic, something real, something which allows your creativity to leap out the box and sprint several kilometres ahead.

the salient answer was sakuatsu.

only in sakuatsu, the angst potential come from the characters themselves. sakusa and atsumu are insufferable, totally unlikeable people (though i have met a lot of people like atsumu and they get on with their day just fine). they have no chill, no qualms, no redeeming feature other than volleyball and their looks and maybe this could work out?

two jerks, aint afraid to talk shit, bringing out the best (or worst?) in each other. maybe they could find love afterall? huh.

what's this? a chance for ao3 authors to expand their creative writing skills to new horizons and take artistic liberties indulgently but still have a locus to ground themselves to so that they don't go all hocus-focus?

you bet they'd take this chance.

famous fics like 'a liar's truth', 'hand study', 'burden of blame' were released and it was the explosive and beautifully belligerent start of a ship no one saw coming. riding on the highs and lows of a relationship, depicting exactly how toxic yet fulfilling realistic dating can be, its upto you how you'd end up. these fics depicted the shimmering tension, the passionate abhor and the disastrous clashes.

there was no way a huge chunk of japanese fans, enough to catalyse its popularity, would be able to reach these fics and fanarts, which were usually just characteristics fleshed out in the author's mind. ooc, if you will.

sakuatsu is literally whatever you want it to be. a murder mystery or a romcom, you decide. it is ever changing, ephemeral, dangerous. you need to keep up with every step to find its beauty.

its a pity that the japanese fandom wasn't able to catch onto this sakuatsu fever and create some god-tier content like they usually do with other notorious ships like kageoi or kitaatsu.

also, osaatsu/atsuosa, kitaatsu and atsuhina are already selling there a lot (which makes a lot of sense in hindsight than this sakuatsu, no offence) and view atsumu as a TOP.

also, also the japanese part of the fandom have no qualms with shipping komosaku and ushisaku and do it graciously, so well both characters are satisifed fully with the japanese seperately as far as they are concerned.

well, if the movies come out, there is a good chance that the sakuatsu car ride would be just around the corner again and maybe this time, the japanese fandom can hop on a ride? and show atsumu riding on sakusa too pls i need to see thier bful art ahaha

[lovely-ell]

Alastor & Reader - Take A Breath

A/N: Hello lovelies! This was requested by @willowaudreykeyes and I hope they enjoy this piece. This is basically Alastor & Overworked Reader, or at least that is how I envision it. I can relate to this on a personal level, and I hope this can bring comfort to those who find it! Considering this is only my second piece, I am of course nervous about writing but I hope you find it entertaining! If you have any feedback, do let me know! I appreciate it more than you know!

Synopsis: As one of Alastor’s close friend’s, they have been helping out at the hotel for some time. As they do not have as intimidating a reputation as the Radio Demon, Charlie has tasked them with some more gentle and personal tasks. In addition to their regular hotel work, it becomes extremely taxing on them until they just break one day. Alastor helps them get through it and offers a listening ear.

Warnings: Mentions of overworking/burnout, definitely some angst and a bit of swearing. Slight mentions of therapy/rehab and sleep deprivation. A bit of self loathing. Anxiety/panic attacks are referenced, some cruel jokes made by Angel. Mostly platonic but some intimacy if you squint.

Fanart: I couldn’t find the person, if you find them please let me know!

I wished the days would just get easier or stop altogether. It was exhausting. I hated it. The hotel itself wasn’t that bad, but working for Mr. Radio Demon made it grueling. If there was one thing that me and him could agree on, though, was that the whole “rehabilitation and going to heaven” thing wasn’t gonna work out. Simply put, we had our chance, we fucked it up, and we end up down here. No point in trying to redeem ourselves when we’re already in hell and had countless opportunities on Earth. Regardless, as much as me and him see it as futile, I still worked at the damned hotel.

Charlie, for some unknown reason, took more of a liking to me than my boss. Could be the fact that I don’t have posters plastered everywhere about myself and my achievements as a powerful demon, but who knows. For this reason, she has given me (another demon, who is in hell for a reason) the task of creating the rehab programs and hosting 75% of the therapy sessions. The only responsibility I didn’t have constantly was cooking. Me, Angel Dust, and Alastor rotated the meals per the week. This was Alastor’s week, and he was making his famous Jambalya.

As he carried the platter of food to the table, the scent wafted through the air with a comforting notion. I had offered to help him, but he insisted that since it was his week, he would do it. Did seem as though he greatly appreciated the offer, I will say.

“Thank you so much for cooking, Alastor! This is delicious”, Hell’s princess shouted from one head of the table to the other. “Oh it was really no problem, do enjoy!”, laughed the infamous overlord, taking great credit for his cooking. I have no shame in admitting that he is the best cook of all of us. At least, generally. Angel makes the best Italian food though.

Alastor turned towards me, two chairs to his right, “I suppose we should get straight to business, shall we?”. We usually start with how the front desk went, and today was my day. I guess I had just gotten the worst day to be on the 5am - 5pm job, as we had gotten many walk-ins, but none of them checked in.

“How did your shift go, Y/N?”, he questioned, attracting the gaze of all the other demons at the table. Satan, how did he always gather so much attention?

“Well, not great…” I solemnly spoke, my eyes averting away from their stares. Even still, I could sense Charlie’s frown and Vaggie’s look disappointment in my sleep. “Oh…well how many checked in?”, she said, trying to establish some form of hope in this hopeless hotel.

“None. We had 6 walk-ins but none of them stayed after I explained the rules.”, my fingers scratched my scalp in frustration as I looked down. The dining hall fell silent for what seemed like an eternity, until the spider stripper finally spoke.

He playfully kicked my shin, “Well damn toots! Whad’ya do this time?”. I heard a few half-hearted giggles from across the table, my eyes beginning to burn. I started to scratch my head harder, not that I had any nails that could do any damage, since I had bit them too short

I tried to contain my anger, not uttering a word. I looked to my right and shot him a glare, the atmosphere getting tenser by the second. Just by that stupid grin on his face I could tell he was getting a kick out of this. “Cat got ya tongue? Eh, oh well. I’d say I’d kill ya but Ms. Princess can do that herself!”, he cackled at the table, nearly falling out of his chair. I rubbed my temples, trying hard to contain myself. Satan, he was funny sometimes but he could be annoying as all hell at others.

I abruptly stood from my chair, knuckles turning white from the strength in which I held my fist. I turned around and left through the back door, undoubtedly getting glares and confused stares.

I took a few laps around the hotel, then settled on the front stairs. I wanted to pull my hair out. Anything to distract me from my thoughts. I had so much paper work to complete, so early it was due. My chest felt heavy as I struggled to take a full breath. I couldn’t see as well and my hearing was muffled. My head spinned with deadlines and the threat of reprimand. Reprimand for something I clearly deserved it for. I was the most emotionally healthy besides Charlie in the entire hotel. It’s supposed to be my job to-

“Take a breath, Y/N”, a voice spoke from behind me. I covered my ears with my hands, hoping to make it all stop. My hands were gingerly pried off of my ears one at a time with gentle claws. “Shh…breathe in my dear”, it spoke again, now creating soothing circles on my back as my head was between my knees. I tried to follow it’s instructions, but I couldn’t manage. “God, why can’t I do anything right!”

It stopped rubbing my back, and it shifted up to my chin. With one claw, it carefully lifted my head so I could see it. It was Alastor. Why was he here? “Sweetheart, it’s alright to not be perfect. We are in hell, after all”, the demon spoke, moving the loose strands of hair away from my teary eyes. My face crashed back into my knees, muffled sobs escaping my lips. I heard his shoes click to my side, and stop with a slight thud. He stroked my hair in an attempt to soothe me.

“Shh…breathe sweetheart, breathe in deeply…”, the overlord spoke, still running his fingers through my h/c locks. After a few minutes, I finally was able to take a deep breath, “Good darling, now try to hold it for me. It’s alright if you can’t”. I held it until he gave the command to let it go, and I did. After that my breathing slowly but surely slowed on its own once more. “Great job my dear, but we really must have a chat if that’s alright”, Alastor questioned, waiting for my approval. I internally groaned, “What, do you need me to work an extra shift tonight?”, I answered with my own question.

“Work? My dear you can’t be serious!”, he said to me, taking my hand in his. “Let’s head to my room, shall we? It would most likely be better to talk of such topics there”. For once in my life I think I may have seen his smile falter

I followed him up the outside emergency stairs, entering his room not moments after getting inside. The Radio Demon motioned towards his bed where I soon sat, him locking the door behind us.

He sat on the bed, averting his gaze for a moment before asking me, “Since there is quite no other way to ask this, I’ll get to it. What is going on Y/N?”. I froze, my thoughts racing. Did I do something wrong? Forget to fill something out? “Al, what did I miss? I thought I did everything that was due?”

“No, no no! Not work! Get work out of that silly little head of yours!”, he said exasperatedly, tapping his nail on the top of my skull. “What is wrong with you, as in why did you abruptly leave dinner to be found sitting on the hotel steps, in the dark, hyperventilating?”, he shifted his body towards me, resting a hand on my shoulder. “I…I’m not sure…”, I answered truthfully, I still don’t know quitewhat happened.

“I can tell you exactly what happened”, he spoke to me. I turned my head up in interest, and he continued. “Charlie has given you some emotionally and mentally taxing jobs in addition to regular hotel tasks, due to your unnaturally friendly behavior in Hell”, the demon said, crossing his arms. “And since you don’t know how to say no, you willfully took all of these tasks and are now overworked and burnt out”, Alastor said, almost in a way a parent would scold their child, but with more care and concern in his tone. Burnt out…that sounded exactly how I felt.

“But who else is going to do it…?”, I lowered my head, not daring to look into his eyes. He once again lifted my chin with his finger, forcing me to look into them. “I’m not sure, but you shouldn’t have to do it all on your own”, he said sternly, but he seemed to have more to say. “You can’t do this to yourself, Y/N. I may be your employer, but I do care for you. And that is why I’m having you take a mandatory 2-week break!”, cheerily he exclaimed, as if it was a cause for celebration.

“Alastor! Who is going to do all of my work while I’m on break! I can’t do that!”, I yelled desperately, in hopes of finding someway to could convince him. “No buts! It starts this evening, right now! I will have the work divided between the hotel, but please, do get some rest my dear”, he said, before lifting himself off of the bed, and beginning to leave. I felt something deflate within me, and wanted to make one final, yet absurd request.

“Wait, Alastor?”

“Yes darling?”

“You don’t have to but..”

“But what?”

“May I have a hug, please?”

“…I suppose one wouldn’t kill me again”, Al said as he walked over, enveloping me in his arms. I sunk into his shoulder, a restful slumber finally falling upon me.

[ellisentry]

Link, my beloved. ❤️

For how much I love the little gremlin pretty boy, you'd think I'd draw Legend of Zelda fanart more. And, I should. I love how this one came out. I was super unhappy with my last drawing and I had to redeem myself. This picture is busy, it took so much time and my eyes burned like crazy, but I adore it.

I've been having issues. Nothing debilitating but just very increasingly consistent stressors that are getting me down. Senior year, AP classes, college prep, applying to countless scholarships with hardly any return. I think it's getting to me.

But, hey - at least I have my art to hide in. This one really lifted my spirits. I hope some others can enjoy it too. :)