#so I had no idea it was so close to their house

[lyricwritesprose]

Blue heelers, oh my goodness, blue heelers. My Mom had a blue heeler. He was one of the most loyal, helpful™ dogs I have ever known. He did Jobs.

Please note that helpful™ is not quite the same as actually helpful.

Please also note that the thing about Jobs is that when one cannot be found, one must be invented, and he did. Not. Stop.

See the thing about my Mom is that she was at that time a retired teacher of about sixty-five living in a suburban area (although unusually willing to go on hikes), and the thing about this dog, whom she acquired accidentally, is that he knew in his bones that he should be managing at least a hundred cows. This is a slight energy mismatch. Mom did care for him to the best of her ability and he did help her stay fit and exercised—that was one Job, he liked that one—but that wasn't enough Jobs, so he would take on other ones, such as improving the yard's feng shui. (It has been about five years since he died, I think, and my Mom's yard is still this weirdly cratered moonscape in which plants mostly grow through a combination of hardiness and Spite. Note that she did not actually intend to join the lawn-free movement. That blue heeler joined it for her. He would actually pull up plants that Displeased him.) He would also herd kids when available. And Canada geese. The fact that he actually had some measure of success with the geese tells you something about what a force of nature this dog could be when he so chose.

Also, one time the Nutcase Neighbor's dog got out—Nutcase Neighbor's Dog was a large bully breed dog which had mostly been isolated, not exercised, and possibly not trained, although the neighbor talked about training him "for security," basically the exact, precisely calibrated situation to make large behavioral issues in a large dog—and when he came towards my Mom in a hostile manner, her dog put himself in a perfect defensive position in front of her and (apparently, he didn't bark or make a sound) told the neighbor's dog to go home peacefully rather than FAFO.

Which the neighbor's dog did. Without a squeak of protest. Still have no idea what my Mom's dog said, body language wise, but it was roughly the same reaction as a big mook walking into a room, finding Batman there, and just quietly closing the door and fucking off while he had the chance. Apparently one of the Jobs was Protection, and neighbor dog may have looked the part, but Mom's dog was a professional.

Like I said, he died about five years ago. We got home and he was clearly having a hard time, so my Mom called the vet while I talked to him. I told him that he had done a very good Job looking after the house while we were out shopping but that we were home now and it was going to be all right, we would take care of things. He made eye contact, closed his eyes, and passed, instant and peaceful. He had been ready, he just wanted to wait until someone was there to relieve him of duty. I actually feel really honored that he trusted me with the Job of looking after my Mom.

I would not have a blue heeler, and at this point neither would my Mom. At this point neither of us can keep up the insane amount of exercise required. But man, he was an awesome dog.

In every generation there is a chosen one…

[peter-pumpkin-eater]

Cold fridge

Caleb x gn!reader

summary: You forget that eating is an every day thing.

warnings: none, fluff, yearning from both of you, One (1) gendered pet name (princess)

word count: 601

The front door swings open and Caleb hip bumps it closed behind him. You’re still on the couch where he left you, same position and everything. He furrows his brow walking past and drops the grocery bags on the kitchen counter. 

“Please tell me you ate something.” He starts unloading the bags, plastic rustling. You lift your head and feel a tinge of pain from not having moved for a long time. You look at him. He sighs. And asks again. “What did you eat today?”

“Eat?” You sit up and place the book you’ve been reading on the armrest of the couch. Caleb can hear the snap and pop of your bones. He’s going to have to give you a massage later today. 

“Yes princess. What did you eat while I was out?” He pulls out some fruit and places them in a bowl. You’ve stood up and started walking into the kitchen, arms high over your head in a stretch. He can’t stop his eyes from flicking to the patch of skin now visible where your shirt lifts up. He moved onto putting canned food away.

“I was meant to eat?” You drape yourself over an empty spot on the counter.

“Yes-” he spins to look at you, a little worried. “Yes pip. You’re meant to eat every day.”

“Every day?” you pout.

“Yes! Every day. Breakfast, lunch and dinner.” He puts his hand on his hip regretting leaving the house for so long. He knew he should have made you something before he left.

“Multiple times a day?!” You let out a groan. “But that's so hard- I already ate yesterday.” you whine. 

Caleb runs his hands over his face and finishes putting the groceries away. You pluck the bag of chips from the pile. They were your favourite, he always buys them for you. Before you could rip into them they fly out of your hands and land gracefully in the pantry. 

“Proper food, sweet-heart.” He scolds. 

“You’re so boring.” But you’re already walking to the fridge to check if any of the bbq chicken leftovers were there. Caleb stands behind you. The heat from his body warming up your back was a stark contrast to the cold in front of you. He reaches past your head and grabs the salad from last night's dinner. “And the chicken.” you chime in before he can fully leave. He pauses his movements and puts his hand back in the fridge.

He’s leaned forward enough for you to feel his breath tickle your ear. “So demanding today.” He breathes out. It causes goose bumps to spread down your neck and arms. You spin in his arms a retort on your tongue. It was a bad idea. You weren't expecting him to be as close as he was - noses almost bumping together. Breathes mingling. You lick your dry lips. His eyes flick down and back up.

You had forgotten what you were going to say. He was too close and your mind went blank. His finger ghosts up your arm, the touch so light it could have been mistaken for the cold air coming from the fridge. They danced across your collarbone and up your neck, coming to a stop under your chin. He lifts slightly, and your pulse races. He tilts his head.

A sharp beeping from behind you makes you jump. The fridge was tired of being open too long. Caleb’s already across the kitchen putting food on a plate for you. A shaky breath leaves you and you grab some water from the fridge and close the door.

[prettyangellllll]

Self control

Summary: rafe is bored and he wants to test eachoters self control by cockwarming you to see who can go longest without moving

Warnings: NSFW, cockwarming, sexual tension, teasing, dominance/submission themes, power play, heavy temptation, loss of control, season two Rafe energy, mutual torment.

----

The weekend had started off exciting, but by the time Sunday afternoon rolled around, boredom settled in like an unwanted guest. You and Rafe had spent the past few days holed up in his house, doing a whole lot of nothing—lounging, eating, watching random TV shows that neither of you really cared about. The rain outside made sure you were stuck inside with no distractions, no plans.

You were sprawled across the couch, scrolling through your phone, while Rafe lay beside you, lazily running a hand up and down your thigh. His touch was absentminded at first, but then it turned deliberate. Slow, teasing strokes that made you glance at him, catching the way his blue eyes darkened with something dangerous.

"Got an idea," he murmured, his fingers dipping under the hem of your shorts.

You raised an eyebrow. "Yeah?"

He smirked. "Mhm. Something to make things… interesting."

You could already tell by the way he was looking at you that whatever he was thinking had nothing to do with movies or playing cards. Rafe never handled boredom well. When he wanted something, he went after it with a single-minded determination, and right now, you had a feeling that you were his next source of entertainment.

When he leaned in, his breath warm against your ear, his voice dropped to a low rasp. "How much self-control do you think you have?"

You frowned slightly. "What do you mean?"

His hand on your thigh tightened. "I mean…" He kissed just below your ear, dragging his lips along your jaw before pulling back to look you in the eye. "Think you can handle sitting on my cock without moving?"

The bluntness of it sent a jolt of heat straight through you, making you tense.

"Rafe," you muttered, but the way he was looking at you made it impossible to say anything else.

He grinned, knowing damn well he already had you. "What? Scared you'll lose?"

That did it. You never liked backing down from a challenge, and Rafe knew it. Which was exactly why he said it.

"Fine," you said before you could second-guess yourself.

And that was how you ended up here—straddling him on the bed, completely bare, his cock buried deep inside you. The stretch was almost too much, your body clenched tight around him, but neither of you had moved.

You were supposed to be winning this, supposed to be showing him that you had all the restraint in the world. But the way he was looking at you—eyes dark, jaw clenched, his hands gripping your hips just to keep himself from fucking up into you—made it so hard to focus on anything but how badly you wanted to move.

Minutes passed. Maybe more.

You swallowed, feeling a bead of sweat roll down your spine.

Rafe smirked. "Starting to squirm, baby."

You narrowed your eyes, forcing yourself still. "Not even close."

"Liar." His hands slid up your sides, slow and deliberate, making goosebumps rise on your skin. He traced your waist, up to your ribs, his thumbs brushing just under your breasts. "I can feel how bad you want it."

You sucked in a breath, digging your nails into his shoulders.

His voice dropped lower. "Be honest. How bad do you wanna move right now?"

"Not at all," you lied, even though your body was screaming otherwise.

Rafe chuckled darkly. His grip on your hips tightened before he shifted the slightest bit underneath you, just enough for you to feel it.

Your breath hitched.

"Oops," he said, all fake innocence.

You clenched around him instinctively, and he sucked in a sharp breath through his nose, his fingers twitching against your skin.

The tension between you crackled like fire.

It was only a matter of time before one of you gave in.

Every passing second made it harder to breathe. Harder to think.

The ache between your legs was unbearable. Rafe filled you up completely, stretching you in a way that left you dizzy, and the worst part was that you couldn't do anything about it.

Your thighs burned from holding still. Your hands clenched at his shoulders, nails digging into his skin just to ground yourself. But the worst part? You could feel him. Every twitch, every subtle pulse of his cock inside you, making the heat between you even more unbearable.

Rafe wasn’t doing much better. His jaw was locked, his fingers flexing against your hips like he was moments away from snapping.

Still, you refused to give in first.

But God, it was so hard.

Your body was betraying you, your hips twitching the slightest bit no matter how hard you tried to stay still. The more you resisted, the more desperate you became. You could feel yourself soaking him, your arousal pooling between you, making it impossible to ignore just how much you needed him to move.

A whimper slipped from your lips before you could stop it.

Rafe let out a low groan, his hands tightening on your waist. "Fuck," he muttered, head falling back against the pillows.

You clenched around him at the sound, another soft, helpless noise escaping your throat.

His grip on you turned bruising. "You're making this real fuckin’ hard, baby," he rasped. His voice was deeper now, rough with restraint. His breathing was uneven, his chest rising and falling beneath you. "You're so wet—fuck."

You could barely form a sentence. "Rafe—"

Another needy sound tore from you as he twitched inside you again.

His hands flexed, and then his control snapped.

With a growl, he grabbed your hips and thrust up into you.

The sudden movement made you gasp, a jolt of pleasure shooting up your spine as your hands flew to his chest.

"Fuck, baby—"

He didn’t stop. His fingers dug into your skin as he fucked up into you, the slow, torturous game you’d been playing thrown out the window. He was done holding back.

"You wanted to play, huh?" His voice was breathless, low, dangerous. "Now you wanna get all fuckin’ whiny, like you're not the one who started this?"

Your head was spinning. All you could do was feel—feel the way he filled you, the way he hit deep, every movement sending sparks through your body.

He grabbed your jaw, forcing your gaze down to meet his. His eyes were dark, wild, hungry. "Look at me when you come," he ordered, thrusting up into you harder. "I want you to watch who won this fuckin’ game."

And just like that, you shattered.

[burrowdarling]

The Offline Series 001

Summary: The introduction to The Offline Series, covering the last day of the regular season and the beginning of the postseason.

Pairings: boyfriend!Joe Burrow x girlfriend!reader

Warnings: This series will have mentions of adult content throughout so MDNI

Note: Hi everyone and welcome to The Offline Series! It's taken some time and rewriting, but the first part is finally here. I have plans to do specific events like the Pro Bowl Games as well as other ideas as connected standalones. I'm excited to create this small for these two and I hope you'll come along for the ride! Asks about these two are always welcome, I'd love to develop a world for them.

Word Count: 5.6k (my longest fic yet!)

Check out my Masterlist here!

Taglist: @burrowbarbie @definitelynotdomanique @one-sweet-gubler @plushkhiii @enchantedinfinity @iosivb9 @hellsingalucard18 @hotburreaux @lilfreakjez @jburrgf Feel free to comment or message me if you'd like to be added to the list!

The past few days have felt a bit tense in the house with the season ending the way it had. Of course, you had wished things had gone differently, but it only made you more hopeful for the next season to come. Things were very touch and go when it came to Joe’s mood. Which was to be expected. You were so proud of him and the way he was able to lead the team to a winning record by the end of the season. You knew Joe was beating himself up about it despite the records he was breaking and the path he was paving in the NFL as a whole. You knew he was MVP material and it gutted you that he wasn’t in the conversation with the numbers he was putting up despite the final scores of each game.

He was processing the way he always would, by himself in his own way. He was going to the gym, meeting with who he needed to, throwing himself into everything else but rest. Arguably that also meant it was most things except time with you. You hadn’t seen too much of him recently, but you could feel his lower energy in the house even when he wasn’t around. Things felt colder and you had to admit you were starting to get a bit lonely. You thought back to that Sunday when the big shift in him happened while you went around the house and tidied, not like there was much when one of your stress relievers was cleaning.

**Flashback to Sunday**

You had the 4:25 games all on at once, each game taking up their respective corners of the screen. You were hopeful that having more than the two games would provide some kind of distraction, but you knew his mind was elsewhere when he kept his vision darting between the two opposing corners of the screen. You wished you could read his mind, making sure to remain close enough if he needed you, but far enough that he was able to be with his own thoughts.

You knew that the other guys were glued in the same positions after talking with the other girls. There was a constant stream of messages in your group chat talking about how the guys were doing and sharing the experience with one another through the phone. By some miracle, you hoped the Jets and Broncos would pull this off. You had a deep gut feeling based on the Chiefs lineup that things weren’t going to go the way you needed them to. The most you could do was hold out hope and watch with cautious optimism. You found yourself copying Joe’s movements, unable to look away from the two most important games. The Jets were starting off strong and that lifted some weight, but the Broncos came out swinging so fast against the second stringers for the Chiefs. 

You couldn’t blame them, really. It was no other team's job to win or lose for someone else, but that didn’t make the game on the screen any less frustrating to witness. The amount of time the Chiefs quarterback was taking in the pocket from having no open players to pass to, it was no wonder he was getting sacked left and right. The score just kept getting higher and higher, the Bengals chances slipping away the more the Broncos scored. The Jets win wasn’t even necessary at this point, feeling worse knowing everything had gone to plan except this once game.

You kept glancing over at Joe, watching the light in his eyes fade with the passing time. You knew he was worried about the outcome as much as he tried to hide it. He wanted a chance in the playoffs, working his ass off to finish with the win streak they had, not to mention the records he was breaking for himself and on the team. If anything he turned colder, feeling the shift in him from where you were sitting on the couch. You made no move to touch him let alone speak to him when he got like this. You didn’t know which version of Joe you would get and you weren’t in the best mindset to find out.

By halftime, Joe had retreated to his office without a word and you let him. You couldn’t get yourself to turn the screen off, watching the abysmal scene in front of you at the Chiefs vs Broncos game. The amount of things that had to go the Bengals way, it felt like it was so far fetched. It really did come down to this one game. The score was so far gone, it was purely to see how far the Broncos would push it. 

Towards the end of the fourth quarter, you turned the game off and made your way to the kitchen to make something for dinner. You didn’t know if Joe would eat, but you had to at least try. You cooked his favorite, plating some for yourself and making him a plate. You walked cautiously up to his office, a warry feeling sitting in your chest as you got closer to the closed door. It was silent on the other side, able to hear a pin drop. You took in a deep breath in an attempt to calm your nerves before you faced what could be on the other side of the door.

You knocked gently on the door, hearing some grumbling on the other side before the door was pulled open. You were met with a blank faced Joe, his hair roughed up from his fingers tangling in it. You knew better than to mention a word about the game. Joe was beating himself up more than you could even imagine. You held his gaze, trying your best to keep things direct as you moved the plate in your hands towards him.

“I made you some dinner in case you were hungry. I’m gonna take a shower and get in bed to read for a bit. In case I fall asleep before you, I love you and I’m here if you need me,” you said and weren’t expecting any type of verbal response back.

He looked down at the meal you made him, watching as the slightly bit of tension dropped from his shoulders. His eyes moved back up to yours and the smallest ‘thank you’ slipped past his lips. You arched up on your tiptoes to reach his cheek, his frame always towering over you. He took the plate from your hands and gave you a nod before turning to close the door. You let him shut himself inside, knowing that all you could do at this point was wait for him to come around. You wouldn’t stop showing him small acts of kindness and support, knowing he was still appreciative even if he didn’t show it. You would always be there to take care of him and you weren’t stopping now.

**End of flashback**

You had your current read perched in your lap, trying your best to keep your mind occupied on something that wasn’t the thick feeling in the air. You were doing anything you could to keep yourself busy-reading, cooking, cleaning, even leaving earlier for work, and getting yourself a coffee in the morning rather than making it at home. You knew Joe would open up when he was ready, but the meantime wasn't always the easiest to manage. You felt your phone buzz on the couch next to you, lifting it to see what the notification was. You saw that it was an Instagram post notification from Joe because of course, you have his notifications on. It was a rare occurrence when he would post anything so you had to be in the know. You clicked on the notification, having an inkling of what it could be, but the wind was still knocked out of your chest as you read his caption.

"Season to remember, sorry you won’t get to watch anymore. Year 5 in the books." 

You stared at your phone for a moment, processing the post he made. You felt your heart break for him, unsure of what could be going through his mind while he was upstairs. Swiping through the few photos he posted along with it. The first photo being of “the big three” as everyone has been calling them. The next two being of himself on the field and the last of him and Ted. You felt like you could sense the emotion through the phone screen.

He came down from his office a little while later, his hair ruffled from constantly running his fingers through it. You could imagine him sitting at his desk, looking for the right thing to say to his fans. The movement of gripping his locks through his fingers was a way of grounding himself when he felt overwhelmed. You noticed it as the season had gone on, tending to do it more often in press conferences when all he wanted was to be at home either alone in his office or with you. He went over to the fridge to grab something to drink, spinning off the cap and taking a huge swig as he walked over to where you were in the living room. You had on some mindless TV show in the background for noise, not paying it much attention.

He came to sit down next to you on the couch, slouching into the cushions with a deep sigh escaping past his lips that he must've been holding in. You shifted to sit up criss-crossed with a blanket draped over your lap. You patted the spot on your lap gently, signaling Joe to rest his head in your lap. He moved to you without a word, positioning his long limbs on the couch to settle his head in your lap with his legs draping over the edge of the armrest.

“Take this as a chance to just be offline for a while. You spent months holding so much of other people’s bullshit all season. You deserve to take the offseason as time for you,” you spoke softly as you started to gently touch his head and felt him lean into your hand. 

Joe let out a sigh of contentment as he settled into your touch. You knew it was something that made him feel safe and grounded. You ran your hands through his hair, giving him time to process your words and respond. A break was something Joe wasn’t the most familiar with, always needing to be on and moving all of the time.

“I know you’re right. It’s just hard to shut my mind off sometimes. It’s hard to feel like I could’ve done more, still can do more to prepare for next season. I don’t want to have the same rhetoric from everyone next season like I did this year.”

You felt your heart break for him. There was an ache in your chest at his admission, feeling a small tear drop against your exposed skin. You leaned over him and pressed a kiss to his temple, letting your lips linger there. 

“I know you worked your ass off Joey, you always do. You also earned yourself some time to unwind for a while, let your body rest. I’m excited to finally get to spend some uninterrupted quality time with you. Your mind and your body deserve to heal J, I’ll be here with you while you do. I already know you’re gonna come back stronger than ever.”

You tilted his chin up, turning his head towards you. You looked down and the gentle giant with glossy eyes in your lap. The thought brought a smile to your lips and a small laugh. You leaned over once more, placing a kiss to his pouting lips this time. You were about to sit back up, but Joe kept you in place. The kiss began to get more intense, feeling a small fire igniting within you at his tongue grazing across your lower lip. 

You were putty in his hands, body willing to do whatever it was that he wanted. Joe loved how reactive you were to his touch, no matter how small or innocent it was. 

A small moan escaped your lips, unsure of how you guys ended up in a full makeout after having such a deep moment. You finally pulled away, the angle becoming too much for you as you started to get a bit light headed. You weren’t sure if it was from having your head turned or the intoxicating pull that was Joe, figuring it had to be some kind of combination of the two. 

“Sorry hun, I couldn’t keep my head like that for much longer. I was only trying to make you feel better, not —” you were cut off from your apology with a much gentler kiss placed on your lips.

“I know that, this was one of those times I was at a loss for words to tell you how much I love you so I figured I would show you instead. I know I can get in my head a lot, I really do appreciate that you give me the space to think.”

“Of course, Joey. You know I’ll always be here whenever you need to talk. Me forcing you isn’t going to do either of us any good in the long run. You also know I’ll happily be a willing participant to your throes of affection. In that case you’re more than welcome to show me properly.”

Joe sat up and took your hand in his to guide you off the couch, moving so quickly towards the stairs.

“Don’t mind if I do, all you had to do was say the word.”

Joe was always amazing in bed, but there was something even deeper about the way he would make love to you. Everything felt ten times more intense than usual, his passion unmatched. You were left lying there breathless, the sheets haphazard over the bed with your body tucked snuggle into Joe's side. His hand gently grazes your side, slowly lulling you to sleep. Exhaustion almost overtook you before his voice broke through the silence that enveloped you.

“Thank you for everything that you do for me. I know I’m not the easiest to love, but I’m grateful for you everyday,” his words waking you from your sleepy state.

You turned around to face him, his arm falling between you as you did. You moved your hands up to cup his cheek, feeling him lean into your soft touch as you stroked the stubbled skin. You felt Joe release a breath he must’ve been holding in and let his eyes fall closed. It was the most relaxed you had seen him in days.

“Joey loving you is the easiest thing I’ve ever done, doing this with you makes the highs and lows worth it all.”

You saw a quick tear slip past his defenses, quick to wipe it away hoping you didn’t see. It was too late for him though, you were too busy doting on him. His eyes looked up to meet yours and it was over for him. Joey tucked himself into your body as if you would make the pain he was feeling go away just from your touch. The more tears streamed down his cheeks onto your exposed skin, silent sobs racked his body and all you could do was hold him. Whispering sweet nothing in his ear while stroking his back with light scratches of your nails. Your heart split in two at the pain he must’ve been feeling, it being so hard for him to let you in.

You have no idea how long you two laid there, your gentle giant finding his solace in your smaller embrace. As his tears seemed to settle and his body relaxed, the tension finally dissipated his body for good from the emotional release. Joe sniffled as he pulled back from your neck. His baby blue eyes were red, his face flushed pink. You brought your hands up to wipe any stray tears from his face. Joe seemed to be closer to his normal self, something still holding him back.

“What’s on your mind?” you asked, able to tell that there was something he wanted to bring up.

“I got an offer to attend the Australian Open and I’ve been thinking about it, it could be a different experience for me. I wasn’t necessarily gonna go, but after we talked I think I’m gonna tell them yes. I was hesitant because I was honestly still feeling so down on myself, but you’re right that I deserve to go out and enjoy the fun things like everyone else has been doing. People are gonna talk regardless so I might as well be happy while they do,” Joe said with a finality to his words and a returning sense of confidence you hadn’t seen for a bit.

“That’s awesome sweetheart, I totally think you should go. Get out of the cold in the land down under,” you joked back with him wishing you could escape the throes of the Cincinnati winter.

By the look on his face, you could tell he wanted to make some kind of oral joke but was holding himself back to preserve the moment the two of you were sharing. You felt him pull you in closer to his chest, his arms securing you in like a fortress from the outside world. You rested your head on his solid chest, letting the sound of his heartbeat bring you a feeling of comfort.

“They offered for you to join me of course, but I know you can't just take off of work that easily. I wish I could have you there with me, I really am sorry for being such a dick and icing you out,” Joe spoke as he peppered the top of your head with kisses 

“I would love to go with you, but I already finessed time to go to Orlando for the Pro Bowl Games with you, unfortunately. I’m excited for you to get that experience and can’t wait to hear all about it. I’ll be here when you get back, don’t worry,” you assured him.

“I’d hope so, don’t be surprised if I don’t let you out of my sight when I get home,” Joe warned in a teasing tone you knew all too well meant only one thing.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way lover boy,” you pushed back, giving him a kiss to his nose. “I’m starting to think I’ll have to make you a self-care plan to ensure you actually take a break for once.”

“Does this plan involve you in all sorts of positions for me,” Joe teased as he brought his hand to cup your bare breast, swiping his thumb over your peaked nipple.

You gasped at his touch, still feeling sensitive. You lightly smacked his hand away as you feigned offense. Your body’s reaction betrays you in that moment, feeling the heat begin to form in your center. You had to be the voice of reason for once, both of you needing some kind of sleep more than anything.

“Get your mind out of the gutter for once, I actually meant it seriously. If I need to take the time to make one for you I will,” you said and you meant it, “just because I work with kids doesn’t mean it can’t apply to you too.”

You worked in mental health, mainly with kids and adolescents. You were able to be a safe space for them to learn how to share, develop healthy coping skills, and work through anything that was going on with them. There were times that you could see where Joe would benefit from taking a different approach. He was such a big advocate for mental health, but he didn’t always give himself the same grace when he needed it.

“Yes ma’am, I’ll behave and take my time. I was honestly thinking of getting a massage tomorrow if you’d like to come with me. It could be a great way for us both to destress,” Joe suggested.

The idea did sound incredibly tempting, knowing you had your own knots and pent up tension stored in your body. You hadn’t gone for a massage in ages and Joe always got them as a form of restoring his body during the season. 

You rolled over, feeling Joe sniggle up behind you as he draped an arm over your waist, “you let me know when and where, you bet I’ll be there.”

Joe’s trip to Australia came and went in a flash, sticking true to his word and making sure he showed you just how much he missed you. Claiming he needed some way to ‘exhaust himself’ and get him to sleep from the massive time change he was combatting. He told you all of the stories from his time there that you hadn’t already heard over the phone while you two lay in bed. You weren’t exactly sure when you fell asleep, being lulled into slumber from the warmth and presence of your boyfriend.

That next morning, you woke up to Joe splayed out next to you. He looked so peaceful; with the thin white sheet draped across his lower half, chiseled chest on full display for you to admire. Both of you had forgotten to pull the shades over after yesterday’s activities, the morning sun casting a warm glow across his sun kissed skin. It felt like a crime to wake him, but you had massage therapists coming to the house. Joe wanted to keep things private and got a few people to come here that he’s worked with through the team during the season. You were grateful considering how tender each of your muscles felt from last night, skin heating at the thought.

The least you could do was wake him gently, shifting on the mattress so you were level with his stomach. You always admired Joe’s body and he damn well knew that. You never got the chance to do so this close and unrushed though. You took your time absentmindedly tracing patterns across his skin, lightly dragging your fingertips through the dips and curves of his muscles and hips. You dropped your lips to his warm skin, making a path of kisses up to his neck. You felt him stir about halfway through, glancing up to see a barely there smile on his lips.

You could tell he was trying to remain “asleep” to not interrupt your pursuit. You decided to have a little fun knowing he was awake. You dragged your lips up his chest, lightly sucking at the skin on the base of his neck. You felt his breath hitch underneath your lips feeling satisfied. You nipped at his ear causing a groan to come from Joe, unable to hold back his facade any longer.

You could tell he was trying to remain “asleep” so as to not interrupt your pursuit. You decided to have a little fun knowing he was awake. You dragged your lips up his chest, lightly sucking at the skin on the base of his neck. You felt his breath hitch underneath your lips feeling satisfied. You nipped at his ear causing a groan to come from Joe, unable to hold back his facade any longer.

He shifted quickly, tucking you under his body as his strong arms caged you into him. You giggled as he ducked his head and nipped at your neck, knowing it was where you were super ticklish. His attacks against you were ruthless, leaving you begging him through sputters of air and laughs to get him to cease fire.

“Good morning to you too,” you said, trying to regain control of your breathing. 

“I could say the same thing to you too, I’m not complaining if I get to wake up to your touch every morning,” Joe said as he ducked back down in an attempt to move things further.

You stuck your hand out as a barrier to stop him. You wouldn’t have nearly enough time with your massage appointments happening soon. You wanted to freshen up quickly to be ready for them when they got there. 

“We’re not gonna have any time right now, J. They’re gonna be here in,” you looked down at your bare wrist, a small laugh rumbling in Joe’s chest at your humor, “like 10 minutes.”

“I’ll bet you I only need three of those ten if you let me,” Joe tried to press, hoping to win you over with a morning orgasm to start your day.

You had to admit, it was definitely a tempting offer. Joe loved lazy morning sex with you, feeling the lack of time constraints and pressure. It was his favorite way to start his day when he could. There were also mornings where quickies would wake either of you up before you had places to be, connecting before your busy days. You contemplated the idea, Joe wiggling his eyebrows suggestively above you trying to entice you. You also would have the rest of the day with this being the only thing you had planned. You worked to flip yourselves to get you on top, Joe grinning thinking that he would be getting his way. You slipped off of him, throwing on some semblance of clothing and ran your fingers through your hair to tame it. 

Joe groaned feeling like you pulled a trick on him. Before he could protest you, the sound of the doorbell ringing sounded through the stillness of the house. A smile crossed your lips as you started to make your way out of the room, turning back once you reached the frame of the door. You left him alone in bed, sat up against the headboard frustrated from your absence. He looked lost, a pout formed on his lips and a prominent bulge obvious underneath the thin fabric of the sheet.

“You should probably take care of that before you come down, I don’t think your massage would appreciate it,” you said with a smirk as you disappeared down the hallway

“Oh you’re gonna get it later sweetheart,” Joe called after you, making you laugh at the promise.

You composed yourself before pulling the door open. You greeted them kindly, letting them in to get everything setup in the living room. The pair seemed lovely, telling you a bit about themselves while getting their things ready. They handed you a robe and requested you change into whatever made you feel the most comfortable. You left to change, tying the robe overtop of the bralette and sleep shorts you put on. You were exiting the bathroom when Joe made his way down the stairs in a pair of tight alo shorts. They were sitting high up on his thighs as if he had them pulled up, the glimpse at the skin making your mouth water. 

It was like he could read your mind, choosing those on purpose as a form of payback for leaving him alone to take care of himself. He dropped you a wink before passing you to say hello, taking the second to shake those thoughts from your mind for the time being. This was technically your fault, but you knew it would also make him more worked up later.

You both laid on your respective tables and let the two ladies get to work. You had never gotten a massage before, not thinking it was a necessity, but having a change of heart after the first few minutes. The lotion felt and smelled absolutely amazing, giving reprieve to your aching and neglected muscles. Your shoulders felt the tightest from how much sitting you had to do at work, constantly seated in different positions at your desk or on the floor if that’s what your clients preferred during their sessions. Sighs of content and groans of pain as she worked tumbled from your lips without a second thought. Joe was mostly silent, making you realize how often he did this and was used to it by now.

Knots you didn’t even know you had were being pressed and worked. You couldn't help the groans of relief that left your mouth, trying your best to taper the sounds. Turning to look over at Joe whose pupils were blown wide as his back was being worked on as well. You let your eyes trail down his frame, knowing exactly what was under the sheet covering his lower half. Your body was heating, feeling conflicting feelings of tension and relaxation as your masseau’s hands worked wonders at alleviating your deep seated stress. You turned your head to face away, knowing it would be for the best.

You made small talk the best you could, finding it hard to speak when certain tight areas were touched, cutting off whatever it was that you were saying. It made you wonder how Joe did this as often as he did, focusing on the temporary hurt being worth it in the end. After about 40ish minutes, they began to finish up and gave you both a few minutes to relax while they went and cleaned up their hands.

You sat up to stretch, reaching your arms above your head and appreciated the lack of pain when you did. You felt Joe’s eyes locked on your body sensing the heat in his gaze without meeting his eyes. He stood up off of his table, not worrying about wrapping his robe back around him. He came to where you were sitting, leaning into you with his hands pressing into the massage table on either side of your legs. His knuckles brushed against your exposed skin, leaving goose bumps in their wake. Joe leaned down more to meet your ear, bracing for what filth was about to come out of his mouth.

“You bet your sweet ass the minute they leave, I’m gonna have you screaming my name for so long your voice will be gone by dinner time,” he whispered, his voice husky and dripping with lust.

You glanced at the clock on the wall, seeing that it was only barely lunch time. You breath caught in your throat as Joe brought one of his hands up to cup your cheek, slipping down to lightly grip your throat. You swore you forgot how to breathe, getting so lost in the moment that the sound of running water scared you back into reality. Remembering you weren’t alone and could get caught with Joe hand around your throat at any moment made a new wave of pleasure wash over you.

You separated when you heard the footsteps begin to get closer. Heat crept up your cheeks at almost being caught in a not so innocent position, even if you were in your own home. You chatted for a few minutes while they packed everything up. You talked about tentative plans for another appointment soon, now that you knew what you were missing out on. You had barely walked them out the door before Joe was behind you in his robe. Your front was pressed against the cold material of the front door, eliciting a gasp from your parted lips. 

“Do you know how hard it was to just lay there knowing you were wearing so little beside me,” Joe said as he slipped your robe off your shoulders placing kisses to the exposed skin, “making all of those little noises of yours.”

Joe slipped the robe off the rest of your body, letting it fall to the floor. Turning you around to face him, keeping your proximity to one another so close it was hard for you to spin. He dropped to his knees before you, taking in the sight before you. He slipped off your shorts, growling at the sight before him.

You had forgone underwear, forgetting to sip some on after this morning and assuming the coverage of the shorts would be sufficient enough. In hindsight, it worked as easier access for a moment like this.

“Naughty girl, getting that entire massage while eye fucking me with this bare pussy,” Joe chastized into the flesh of your thighs, alternating between kissing and nipping at your skin.

“I was too preoccupied this morning, I guess I must’ve forgotten,” you spoke, half lying as you tried to keep your head on straight from his touch so close to where you wanted him the most.

“Likely story, you could’ve had this pussy wrapped around my cock this morning, but someone had to be a tease,” Joe said as he brought his hand down to your wet pussy.

Joe wasted no time in latching his mouth onto your center, feeling so close a release already from how strung up your body already was. He alternated between licking and sucking that your mind was spinning. You gripped your hands into his hair, tugging slightly to let him know how close to the edge you were.

Right as you were about to fall over it, Joe pulled back and stood to meet your lips in a rough kiss. You groaned in frustration at your lack of climax, irritated at how close yet so far you were from release. When Joe pulled back 

“What the hell J, I was so fucking close,” you whined, knowing you sounded like a brat.

“You’ll get there when I let you, if someone was nicer to me this morning then they wouldn’t be left hanging would they,” Joe said as he sauntered off towards the stairs, “I'm gonna hop in the shower. I want you on the bed and ready for me once I’m out and maybe I’ll let you cum if you behave.”

You were stunned in your spot for a moment. The time off seems to already be doing wonders for his mood, the downside being that he had time to be just as much of a tease as you were. You hustled up the stairs doing exactly what he asked. You were glad that your body was relaxed, not sure if Joe would be using that to his advantage. You could get used to disconnected Joe.

[vyrulent]

They were husband and wife. The idea of playing pretend, of playing house, had been forgotten. In the space of this lovely villa bedroom, it was a reality. Chloe wasn't just Lucifer's maid here. She felt truly loved in a way that she had never felt.

The winds from the sea softly brushed against the windows around them. She melted into his touches, into his kiss. She parted her lips, allowing the kiss to slowly grow deeper. It was just the two of them here. There was no rush to get anywhere fast. The initial nervousness of sex and intimacy had faded from existence. The nervousness of what to expect had passed. Now, she could just simply be and live perfectly in the moment with him.

Hand reached up to press gently against his cheek as they continued kissing. Mouth opened, tongue darted out ever so carefully as she felt the strong desire to taste him.

For a moment, she parted her lips. Eyes remained closed as she allowed her mouth to hover over his.

"I love you, Lucifer."

His hand came up to overlap hers on his cheek, turning his face to place a kiss at the center of her palm. Even with the hard labor of being a maid, Chloe's hands were still surprisingly soft. Those same hands that brushed through his hair until he got sleepy, the ones he held in his own as they danced in his bedroom, the ones that had clung so tightly to him even when their owner was in the midst of a nasty fever.

"Oh, no. Then where would we be?" He said with a teasing little smile. The dream-like atmosphere that had permeated around them since stepping on the boat showed no signs of leaving them. Here, in Spain, he felt like he wasn't the Devil, the fallen one, the curse of humanity. He was merely Lucifer, treating his bride to a holiday away. He knew eventually he'd have too wake from that dream, but while he was in it, he wanted to make it last.

Lucifer's body moved with hers, gently chasing her lips as she laid back down. Pressing a hand on the mattress beside her head to hold himself up, he continued to kiss her, slowly and languidly. And in that moment, nothing existed outside this room. Just them and the peaceful quiet of the villa.

[writingwisterias]

I know requests are closed so there really isn't any rush, please take your time and respond when you are ready. :) But I would love to hear your take on the reader letting Leon use them as a toy, while he looks at porn or scrolls other girls profiles. I just want to be a vessel for his cock and nothing more <3

I sure can omgggg, I mixed this is with an idea that has been stuck in my head all fucking day! I know this is late lmao but it works perfectly. I can't tell if I hate or love it either

Warnings: SMUT, MDNI, Degradation Kink, Cock warming, Dom!Leon, Intox Kink, Age-Gap, Overstimuation, Dickhead!Leon, Erectile dysfunction (Whiskey Dick), Light Praise kink, Creampie, Unprotected Sex, Reverse Cow-girl, Light Angst, Drinking, Alcoholism, Self-doubt

Vendetta!Leon x AFAB!Fem!Reader

It wasn't normal to have a relationship like this, you knew that. To be with someone so closed off to not only the people they care about but themselves. You knew you weren't going to get anything better with him but he still gave you attention. Still kissed your pretty tears away when he would fuck you. Being used by him at least made you feel like you had a purpose in this life, that someone actually wanted you.

It didn't matter it was just for sex. For Leon that was perfect having no connection to someone meaning he didn't have to spill the horrors that plagued him.

It wasn't unusual for you to saunter into bars, prying on the broken men slumped against the stools for free drinks. Uni was rough, barely having enough money to pay for your food yet alone the drinks you craved. All that work, a diploma under your belt just for you to be wondering here every night dressed to the point where your tits might as well just hang out. Normally as a thanks to the poor souls you would convince to get a drink or two, you'd drag the round back or to the toilets and give them a few pumps of their gross cocks and then leave them in the alleyway drowning in the aftermath of their orgasm.

Not Leon though.

He didn't fall for it. Leon's words never slurred like the others guys did, his shoes didn't drag across the floor in an eager drunken stumble as he followed you with a warning smirk. You weren't used to drunk men being so coherent with you, to actually realize they were paying for your drinks with the promise of a ghost of your touch. The growing pit in your stomach told you that you would have to do more than a few fake moans and whimpers to get him to cum. His looks made it worthwhile, his attitude demanded your attention and effort. Almost like if you didn't cave into this persona he put in place you weren't worth his time.

However, Leon differed to the other men, somehow in a more pathetic way that caused you to suck in you bottom lip to prevent the low chuckle. No despite the darker look in his eyes, the ego you were surprised even fit in the bar entrance. The poor guy could not get his cock to rise. His cheeks flushed pink as he stared at his stubborn dick as it flopped pathetic in front of you. Trust it to ruin his night further.

You thought Whiskey dick was just a rumour, never really experiencing despite all the older men you dragged around like a puppy on a leash...it until now. Maybe that's why you took pity on him and allowed him to drag you back to his home on a risky drunken bike ride.

It was all so dangerous...so thrilling. Being dragged back to the strangers house, the feeling of sipping the alcohol from the glass he held in hand. That night changed everything, not just for him but for you. Perhaps this was you purpose in life. Your true calling was to be this sex doll for a depressed alcoholic so he could finally get some release in his supposed shit life.

It should have insulted you more that the only purpose you to him was to be a glorified doll but then you would have gotten this lavish life. To be able to wander around his penthouse free of rent, money chucked at your feet to keep you quiet as he sauntered off to god knows where. Your soul purpose to him was to sit there and look pretty.

So that's exactly what you did.

Leon's cock was so far inside of you stretching the limits of your poor pussy. It had been hours since he managed to get it to even twitch let alone becoming hard enough for you to sit on it like this. He spent half the time blaming it on the stress from the mission he had just returned from and not the whiskey glass that was sat on the side table. Your throat burned from the neat liquid that he gave you. He had to share...he always shared. You didn't care though not when it took away the burn from his stretch or the ache in your thighs from where they remained spread out across his own.

He didn't pay any attention to you, no, his eyes were glued to the phone that he held out to the both of you. Your job was to squirm and clench him as he watched the porn he pulled up. His fingers absently moved around that needy little clit drawing figures of 8 around the puffy nerve. Smirking at the small gasps that left your lips as his finger pinched it. You couldn't see the video, not with the tipsy glaze that washed over them. Instead you had to rely on the stimulation he was giving you to reach an orgasm.

You moaned loudly as he finally started to move his hips, a shallow grind nothing like the pace the man had on the video he was watching. Leon liked to make it last, after all the days of him getting this hard and thick were far and few between. The sudden change was a lot for your tispy brain, his soft grunts filled your ear as he nipped at your neck. You felt his arm around your waist tightening as he adjusted you. "Shh, just take it" Leon grunted, his lips muting you in a harsh kiss. His lips tasting like the remains of the whiskey from his last sip.

"Good girl" He groaned as his hips grinded inside you, his length barely exiting you.

You cheeks flushed darker with the compliment, your back arching against his chest just for something...any form of simulation. Leon's grip loosened around your waist allowing your hips to circle slightly. You listened as his grunts soon turned into groans as he felt your walls contract around him. You worked yourself to an orgasm, providing him with the warmth as stimulation of your moments not entertainment.

Leon's eyes still remained only on the small screen. Watching the guys cock slide in and out of the girls pussy much like his was doing right now.

He watched your breasts bounce in the corner of his eye as you adjusted yourself to used his knees for leverage to bounce once his arm fell from your waist. Your nails bit into the fabric of his trousers. "Fuck" You muttered as he shfited himself to sink back in the chair, his legs spreading wider. "Shit I needed this...I need you" He groaned. You weren't sure if he was telling the truth most of the time. You could never tell if you were actually something to him instead of a glorified fleshlight.

"Much better than my hand or any toy...my personal little sex doll"

Each word sent tingles down to your pussy, your clit twitching against his balls. "Leon-"

"Dolls don't talk sweetheart, I want to hear my video"

An apology lingered on your lips along with your moans and whimpers silenced by the bite of your lower lip. You were you to do anything above your station for him. It was all becoming too much, his cock was perfect filling you perfectly as the tip brushed against that spongy spot inside. The twitches of it were becoming more violent the closer he got. His grunts and groans finally becoming breathless, all signs that he was almost done. That his tired dick was finally ready to pump the cum it was meant to do after so long of forcing it to rise.

Your moan slipped past your lips as your orgasm finally snapped, your walls sucking him in tightly. No doll could do that, squeeze him like a vice as they whimpered and shivered on his lap. "Fuck sweetheart" He grunted as he buillied his cum into you. His eyes only leaving the phone to pull you back against him to stop the obstruction to the money shot of his cum leaking out from between you falling on the fabric that surrounded his balls. He watched your chest rise and fall you heaved out breaths, your limbs becoming loose on him like a weighted blanket.

It didn't take long as guilt settled whilst he came down from his high. Leon the thought about the way he treated you, the way you just put up with it all with no complaints. As if that was your only worth in this life.

He couldn't bare look in the mirror not when the eyes of his younger self would stare back in shame. Instead his fingers placed the phone on the side table and reached for the whiskey instead. Drowning the thoughts was better whenever it was with your pussy or the amber liquid. He wasn't ready to face the younger version of himself. Or the belongings that he managed to keep buried deep on the top shelf of the closet, where they should stay.

He knew you had your own problems that's why you didn't hesitate as he bought the glass to your lips. You didn't cough as the burn of the amber liquid settled on your chest. Instead you looked at him, eyes begging and craving for something more from him. This was the only intimacy that you got, these post nut clarity where his mind was just slightly clearer. Perhaps this is all you'll ever get from him. The intoxicating whirlpool of Leon Kennedy.

[tulentiy]

Planing your pregnancy with Jiyong headcanon

Summery: you and Jiyong decided to start planning to get pregnant

Warnings: obvious talk of pregnancy

A/N: i'm just a girl, i couldn't stop thinking about that idea since i read a father!Jiyong headcanon so yeah, here's just a little something :3

Boyfriend!Jiyong who didn’t want to waste time on a relationship that won’t bring in his life exactly what he wanted - a family. 

When you just started dating, one of the very first questions he asked you was “What do you think about children?” You were having dinner in a fine restaurant, his fingers curled around the stem of the wine glass, circling it around its axis to gather his thoughts as he was trying to ask this question. Your answer would be crucial, he thought, he wasn’t sure he was ready to start a relationship that won’t lead to kids, he wanted it his whole life and being in his mid thirties now only made him more anxious about it. The way his features softened and the small smile stretched on his face upon your answer made your lips let out a soft giggle. Yes, you loved kids and you wanted to have them. Especially with Jiyong, after getting to know him. 

Husband!Jiyong who's making all the appointments with the best doctors in Korea to make sure you're both ready to conceive a healthy child

“Aegiya,” Jiyong lifted his gaze from his laptop to you, while you were cooking some food. You half turned to face him, a question on your face. “Do you have any plans for the next Sunday?”

You sighted, scratching your neck, gaze lost somewhere between Jiyong and the wall behind him. “I don't think so, no. Why?”

He closed the space between his torso and table, resting his head on his palms, his voice low and a little bit uncertain. “I thought, since we both agreed on trying to get pregnant, should we see doctors? I want to make some appointments for both of us.” 

Husband!Jiyong who randomly started making your house the most safe place on earth

One morning you woke up to find Jiyong collecting all the cleaning supplies, sprays, bath cosmetics in a box. You were staring at him going through all of his and yours perfumes, inspecting the labels on the boxes with the attentiveness of a scientist. 

“Yeobo, what are you doing?” Your voice were soft and deep from the sleep. You saw Jiyong shiver and put yet another perfume bottle in the different, smaller box. 

“We need to get rid of everything with strong chemicals and I've also read that strong perfume can affect male reproductive system…” he whispered the last words a bit sheepishly, turning to face you with a lopsided smile and furrowed brows.

You trotted to him, instinctively sliding your hands down his body and wrapping them around his waist, as you peeked into the box over his shoulder, a soft sign flying off your lips. “You're gonna throw it all away?”

Jiyong hummed, placing a kiss on your cheek. “Maybe only the cleaning supplies, I'll get new organic ones, we can keep the perfumes, just don't use these.”

Husband!Jiyong who has quit drinking and smoking cause it's better for your kid 

Jiyong never understood why people only talk about the pre conception health for a future mom: don't drink, don't smoke, don't be stupid and everything the society tell women not to do. He threw all of his cigarettes away and all the alcohol he had he gave to his friends. “Men should stop doing it too, if you want to have a healthy child. You know, the kid gets both father's and mother's genes, right? We both should be healthy.” That what he said when instead of some nice beverage he ordered a fresh juice, when he met up with his friends after an event they all attended. 

Husband!Jiyong who memoriezed your cycle almost better than you 

He knows exactly when your phases change, he has it all in his calendar. It's silly and in the beginning you thought Jiyong was being too extra, but it kept melting you down every time Ji would ask you if you took the specific pills that were only prescribed to take during a specific phase of your cycle. Later, when you were already trying to concieve he'd plan his working scheduel around your ovulation, making sure he'd be with you 24/7, making that beautiful child

Husband!Jiyong who takes his doctor’s advise of having more fresh air too literally 

“Aein, I have a surprise for you!” Jiyong sang as he entered the bedroom, finding you still laying comfortably in the soft sheets. “Get up, get up, get up." You felt his fingers wrapping around your ankle, tugging you lightly to the edge of the bed. "Please, I need to show you something, you'll like it, I swear!"

A few mugs of coffee and a two hours car ride after, you were standing infront of a cottage, huge territory around it with lots of trees and a small pond.

Your puzzled eyes stayed fixated on Jiyong, as he was staring at you with a huge shining smile, eyes darting between you and the house. “Do you like it?”

“Yeobo, what's that?” Your eyes couldn't lie, you liked the view, perhaps too much, and Jiyong didn't fail to notice the glinting. 

He extended his arm to you with his fingers curled into a fist, and opened it slowly, revealing the keys. “It's ours.”

“It's what, it's… Jiyong!?” Living with Kwon Jiyong, you wasn't easily swayed by the presents and surprises, the amount of incredibly beautiful and rudely expensive presents you've received from him was uncountable, the branded clothes, the cars, the custom made watches and rings that would cost someone their whole life savings, but this, this was too much even from him. “What do you mean this is ours?”

Jiyong scratched his neck, his smile starting to twitch just a little. “The doctor said the fresh air is important for your health, and…” he got quiet for a couple of seconds, his gaze getting softer and foggy, almost dreamy, as he looked you over, lingering on your belly. “and when we finally have a kid, wouldn't it be amazing to live here?’ he grabbed you by the waist and pulled closer gently.

"That... That would be amazing, Ji." Words slipped your lips, as you pressed your cheek to Jiyong's chest.

So, that's it for now, thank you for reading and I hope you liked the little hc 💖

[muletia]

God I need to get Optimus pregnant and it's not even in a necessarly horny sense anymore.

It's the way Optimus referred to "family" as a strictly human concept to Ultra Magnus. Over his time on earth he's grown utterly enchanted by the idea of having one, especially once you're in the picture, but knows it cannot be. No matter how badly either of you want it.

I need him to one day, when everything settles down and you start living out in your little cottage, start noticing a bunch of strange symptoms: He's oddly fatigued, as if his frame is suddenly dumping power somewhere new. He's simultaneously overcome with an unexplainable hunger and nausea, as if his tanks are clamoring for fuel other than energon and reformatting to process it.

I need him to nearly break out in joyful sobbing when Rachet disbelievingly explains his scan's findings to you. Doesn't even have it in him to scold you both for being this irresponsible, not when his old friend looks so... fulfilled. Sincerely thanking him before turning and all but collapsing into you. It's probably best Rachet gives you both a moment of privacy with the news...

(Pregnancy glow hits Opti hard btw)

oh my god, OH MY GOD this is so peak

Me thinks Optimus, at first, would be completely unaware of the meaning behind all these symptoms. Sparked up bots on Cybertron were extremely rare, not to mention that after the war began, there was neither the time nor the opportunity for the creation of new sparklings. Optimus never really had much — if any — exposure to carrier bots. His knowledge of reproduction is limited to the basic understanding that his species is capable of it (something must have ignited that first spark of drive toward reproduction, after all) and that he very, VERY much wants to have one with you. All of the symptoms associated with being sparked up are completely foreign to him.

That’s why, at first, he isn’t concerned. He rationalizes the oddities as simply his body adjusting to a new, slower, more peaceful life. The shift from Autobot leader to house husband, whose most stressful responsibility is remembering to refill the hummingbird feeder, is drastic. No wonder his frame is responding to it. And the fact that these symptoms have persisted for weeks, months, even? Well. Maybe he just needs a lot of time to fully adjust.

Until you begin to notice that something strange is going on with Optimus.

The energon supply is disappearing at an alarming rate. More than once, you’ve woken up in the middle of the night to the sound of him rummaging through cupboards and the storage shed, searching for more. He snacks constantly, even though he’s just refueled. And lately, he’s been so clingy. Always wants to be close to you, touching you in some way, whether it’s cuddling or simply maintaining some form of contact. He’s stopped going on his usual walks to watch birds just so he can spend more time with you.

And most concerningly, he’s started whimpering when you are ready to leave for work, begging you to stay home. With him.

The realization strikes you like a bolt of lightning the moment you finally notice the slight swell of his abdomen (since we’re already fully committing to human pregnancy symptoms, why not give him a little baby bump?)

"Opti… are you… pregnant?"

And suddenly, everything clicks into place for him, too.

Ratchet is contacted immediately. Then comes disbelief. Shock. And joy. So much joy. The old medic has never seen his friend so genuinely happy, so full of life. Optimus' usual reluctance toward PDA is completely overridden by his sheer need to share his happiness with you. He covers your face in kisses, confessing that his greatest dream has just come true.

And while, at first, it’s incredibly difficult for you to process the idea that a robot can even get pregnant, let alone with an entirely different species, his joy is so raw and so pure that you can’t help but be swept up in it, too. For now, you don’t want to think about how or why. You just want to stay in this beautiful moment with him.

But, of course, there’s no avoiding a very long lecture from Ratchet about responsibility and how in Primus’ name is this even possible?!—it’s an unskippable cutscene. But the sting of his scolding is completely overshadowed by the sweetness of this joyous revelation.

and you are so real for the pregnancy glow. that Opti face card is gonna be LETHAL

[yes-these-obsessions-are-healthy]

^^^^ She was genuinely surprised at his seemingly 180 into malevolence, like the rug was pulled from under her that her playmate was being so mean out of nowhere. They were having such fun! :(((((

I peg Ren as 4 or 5 years old, and kids at that age who feel uncomfortable around certain adults aren’t very good at hiding it, let alone allow themselves to be touched without a fuss, so that serenity of play and even grinning when he jokingly pinches her cheek indicates that she had deemed him a Safe Adult. Silco must have introduced himself as “one of Daddy’s friends” (I have no idea if she was left alone. My only guess is that she had a Zaun nanny and Silco paid them off/threatened them to leave because otherwise Ren being in an otherwise empty house makes absolutely no sense) and her, being extremely trusting as kids are, was like “Okay! :D Let’s play in my room!” and again, she’s 4 or 5 and kids LOVE it when you actually sit down to play with them and talk to them. Silco actually getting his decrepit ass to sit on the floor and play with Ren demonstrates he knows how children operate as much as he does adults. People are simple puzzles with easy-to-determine motivations, young children even more so. Playing with Ren wasn’t “beneath him” as a grown adult man the way many male characters in other series deem it to be. It was a snaky thing to do because it’s a viper inching close to a chick, but there’s also some sick sort of genuine enjoyment he was getting out of performing the facade of “Uncle Silco”, however briefly.

Also lowkey the fact he and Ren are able to build that wooden panel tower is impressive. Lots of villains have chess, Silco has a card tower to show off how savvy he is.

Also-Also how much you want to bet she asked about his eye and asked if it hurt. I’m 97% sure she would’ve because that’s something a child her age wouldn’t NOT ask.

Still wild to me that you have Silco, menacing, sly, and silky, and then we’re given a scene where he’s literally playing with toys with a child and they actually animate him doing this

Like a little troll. Completely unexpected for the viewer. He is never this whimsical ever again. It’s like a deliberate glitch in his facade and adds another weird dynamic to his personality that he is not only a crime lord but that he can and will get silly with it.

[himbosandhardwear]

Two Truths I 1.3k I NSFW-ish

“How'd you get it to stay?”

“Soldered it into one solid piece,” he brags, cigarette caught in the corner of his smile.

“You're insane. I can't believe that was you the whole time.”

“It was Ronnie's idea, I just made it happen.” He taps his cigarette out in the crystal ashtray balanced on his knee. His legs are spread open, so Steve can reach the ashtray if he needs to. “I thought he looked very metropolitan with an earring. Chic even.”

Yeah, the gold hoop earring in the mascot tiger costume was ultra modern. Steve rolls his eyes but doesn't argue. He doesn't give a shit about defending a stupid High School mascot over a harmless prank from five years ago. Eddie's antics are a thousand times more entertaining than any of his stupid basketball stories.

“You know what game you'd kill at?”

“Monopoly? Dog! I called it, you can't have it, I'm always the dog!” He nearly dumps the ashtray in his excitement.

“No, shut up. I'm the car anyway, duh. I was gonna say, Two Truths and a Lie. That's your game.”

“Hmm, never played.” He rolls his head around the back of the couch, his haphazard bun goes even looser. “Is it a drinking game?”

“Doesn't have to be. Just a guessing game really. You just say two things that are true and one lie and the other person has to guess which one is the lie. But it can't be like, ‘I have brown eyes, I have brown hair, in 1983 I helped defeat a monster from an alternate dimension.’”

“You have hazel eyes.”

Steve blinks for a second. “Yeah. But anyway, it has to be less obvious, is what I'm saying.”

“Got it. So, like, okay… My dad is in the penn for Grand Larceny, Wayne's only confirmed kill in ‘Nam was a poor defenceless monkey, and my favorite subject in school was Home-Ec.”

“Shit. I don't know if I want the monkey thing to be true or not.”

Eddie's dimples make an appearance. “My favorite was Theater. Home-Ec was a close second though. I made a pillow and used it to sleep through Algebra.”

Steve cracks a laugh. “Yeah, that tracks.” Okay, his turn. His life suddenly seems boring in comparison, even with all the shit he's been through. He used to be good at this game but he's kinda set himself up for failure here against Eddie.

“Dying of boredom…”

“Shut up! Okay, how about this… My paternal grandparents were from Scotland, I have a B.B. permanently lodged in my ankle, and my first three-way was with Tommy and Carol.”

Eddie chokes on air, making Steve laugh in delight.

Once he's got his breath, he looks at Steve in suspicion. “I'm gonna assume you didn't actually get close to Hagan's freckled weiner.”

Steve's grin feels mean, like whenever Tommy said something particularly scathing to some anonymous Freshman. “B.B. is stuck in my thigh actually.” He pulls his shorts up enough to show him the white scar.

God, the look on Eddie's face - perfectly, comically shocked, mouth open, eyes white around the iris - makes him feel so good, to have something like that up his sleeve, something to shock the wildest guy Steve knows.

“You're gonna catch flies like that,” he says, smug. “It's your turn.”

Eddie snaps his mouth shut, teeth clacking audibly. “Fine. Let's see,” he taps his finger against his chin, “raising the stakes…” He slips Steve a look, conveying his playful scheming. “I've had sex at school, I've had sex at the Hideout, I've had sex at your house.”

His immediate instinct is to call bullshit at Eddie fucking here, because when exactly would he have accomplished it, but then he remembers who provided the favors at most of his parties and he hesitates. Eddie watches Steve go through this realization, watches with a smugness that he wants to wipe off.

“It had better have been on my parents bed,” he concedes.

“Laundry room actually.”

“I hate you.” He crosses his arms and pouts, nearly asks who with but he's not sure he wants to know. “So which one was the lie?”

“School. Obviously. My dick couldn't get hard there even if I wanted it to.”

Memories of sitting in class surface, trying desperately to hide his boner, but he's not gonna admit it. Even though he's certain Eddie had the same problem at least once. It’s basically a rite of passage for dudes.

“My turn, you absolute freak.” Now what does he admit to to top getting it on with some mystery person on his parents dryer? “Hmm… I put actual notches on my bedpost, I've got a pair of girl's panties stashed in my underwear drawer, I used to jerk off with Tommy when we were younger.”

“Okay, now I know you're fucking with me,” Eddie exclaims, arms flailing.

“Which one, Munson? Take your pick.”

Eddie continues to stare, which is a bit nerve wracking but Steve maintains his composure. He's 99% sure Eddie is gay, and therefore won't judge him on this, but there's always that small chance Steve is wrong and this whole thing goes sideways. Three-way with Tommy? Could be a drunken mistake. Teenage jerk off sessions? It happens, no big deal. But both? At one point in Steve's life he'd been able to write off both as normal but Robin had put the writing back on the wall, so to speak.

“That's why he said he didn't want your sloppy seconds,” Eddie mumbles.

Steve blanches. “Who?”

“B- Nobody.”

No fucking way. No. Fucking. Way.

“Eddie. Did you fuck Billy Hargrove in my laundry room?” His voice is eerily calm.

“No.”

Steve waits a beat. “Did Billy Hargrove fuck you in my laundry room?”

“.......no.”

“Your turn,” he growls.

“Wait, which one was the lie?”

He crosses his arms, still pissed off beyond belief. “I don't put notches on my bedpost, that's tacky.”

“On the belt then?” He tries to snark but it falls flat. Steve just stares until he looks away. “Fine. Let me think.”

If he admits to fucking Billy, Steve doesn't know what he's gonna do. The very idea of it makes him want to tear his hair out.

“I over-charged you on weed for years, Gareth is mean to you because he has a crush, I'm sorry I gave Hargrove head in your laundry room.”

Steve gets up and leaves the room. Eddie doesn't call him back. He stomps all the way to the kitchen, yanks the fridge open, grabs another beer, and chugs the entire thing standing there with the door open. When he gets back, Eddie is standing in the middle of the room, awkwardly shuffling like he wants to leave.

“Sit,” Steve barks, “we're not done here.”

Eddie complies but with a stiffness that reads like he may bolt at a moment's notice.

“I fucking know you over-charged me for the weed so I have to assume Gareth does not, in fact, have a crush on me.”

Eddie nods, sheepish. “Hates you for the usual reasons.”

“Right.” The important takeaway here shouldn't be that Eddie had sex with Steve's arch nemesis, it's that he's admitting to being queer. Good. He stares at the side of Eddie's head. “I was straight, I am bisexual, I have bad hair days.”

He watches as Eddie's entire body rotates around to stare directly into Steve's soul. His tongue makes an appearance, wetting his lips.

“I am gay, I am very gay, I am the most gay anyone has ever been.”

That's comical. “No, the most gay anyone has ever been was Robin when she left the room during that scene in The Hunger.”

Eddie matches Steve's smirk. “Correct.”

“I want to kiss you, I want to make you forget Billy Hargrove’s name…..I have brown eyes.”

Eddie's grin rivals that of his grand theft auto exuberance. “Your eyes are hazel.”

“Correct.”

“I am going to kiss you, Billy Who, and…oh, who gives a shit.” He tackles Steve into the arm of the couch.

They don't make it to the laundry room but there's always tomorrow.

[johtoes]

♯┆𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐆𝐎𝐎𝐃𝐁𝐘𝐄𝐒 .ᐟ

─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: You always knew Nanami put too much weight on his shoulders, that he carried his burdens in silence. But when he leaves for Shibuya, neither of you say what truly matters. And when the news comes, it’s already too late.

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: Nanami Kento x Reader

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: Major character death, grief, emotional distress

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 645

─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───

The sun was just beginning to set when Nanami walked through the door, the golden light casting long shadows across the floor. You looked up from where you sat on the couch, book in hand, the soft hum of a jazz record filling the air. He was home early.

You didn’t need to ask why.

“You’re leaving,” you said, voice steady despite the way your fingers tightened around the book. The words sat heavy between you, a truth neither of you wanted to acknowledge, but one that had been looming for days now.

Nanami exhaled, slow and measured. “Yes.”

He set his briefcase down by the door with deliberate care, as if stalling for time. Then, after a pause, he crossed the room and sat down beside you, close enough that his warmth pressed against your side, but not close enough to fully reach you. That was Nanami—always restrained, always holding back.

“Tonight?”

He nodded. A flicker of something unreadable passed over his face before his expression settled into something neutral, something practiced.

A weight settled in your chest. “And you don’t think you’ll come back.”

Nanami didn’t answer right away. Instead, he reached for your hand, his touch firm, grounding. His thumb traced slow, deliberate circles against your skin, a rare moment of tenderness from a man who so often kept himself composed. “I don’t want to lie to you.”

You turned to face him, searching his tired eyes, the lines of exhaustion carved into his features. He had been carrying too much for too long, and now, it was as if he had already resigned himself to what was coming. You hated it. Hated how easily he accepted his fate, how he had already started to make peace with the idea of not returning.

“Then don’t,” you whispered. “But if you’re going to leave, I want you to promise me something.”

Nanami tilted his head slightly, a silent prompt to continue.

You swallowed the lump in your throat. “Promise me that, even if you think you won’t make it, you’ll try. You’ll fight to come home.”

His grip on your hand tightened just slightly, and for a moment, something flickered across his face—hesitation, regret, something unspoken and heavy. His gaze dropped to where your fingers intertwined, and when he looked back up at you, the usual stoicism in his eyes had softened.

“I promise.”

A lie. A beautiful, cruel lie. And you both knew it.

But still, you let yourself believe it, if only for tonight.

Nanami pressed a kiss to your forehead, lingering there for just a second longer than necessary, memorizing the feel of you, the scent of your skin, the way you trembled slightly under his touch. When he pulled away, there was a finality in his movements, as if he had already accepted that this was goodbye.

“Get some rest,” he murmured. “I’ll see you soon.”

And then he was gone.

The door clicked shut behind him, and the house was silent save for the faint crackling of the record player. You sat there for a long time, staring at the spot where he had been, fingers still curled in your lap as if you could still feel his touch.

Days passed. The weight in your chest never lifted. Then, one evening, a knock at the door sent a shiver through you. You hesitated before opening it, but the moment you saw Yuji standing there, eyes red-rimmed, face adorned with scars, fists clenched at his sides, you knew.

You didn’t need him to say it. You already knew.

The world tilted, everything around you blurring as Yuji opened his mouth to speak, but you heard nothing. Just a ringing in your ears, a crushing silence swallowing you whole.

Nanami wasn’t coming home.

─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───

© 2025 johtoes. All rights reserved.

[221beemine]

That was the most beautifully shot episode of TV I've ever seen. Yay female directors who are ALSO female DPs! Get that Emmy! The transitions. The film/color grading. The lighting. The close-ups. Professor Mark in a brown blazer with designer scruff and a pen in his mouth, I was WEAK.

I wasn't terribly surprised by how their relationship was portrayed (although it seems to be a Rorschach test for people, like some people said their marriage was "failing"--what?? They had a bad stretch with fertility, and were sad about it, which is very common. They definitely still loved each other even if the honeymoon period had calmed down. That is a long-term relationship guys). It was really well done though and the Dead Wifey montage was through the roof but at least it was very pretty. I liked her, I liked them together. They were SO HAPPY. I saw a post somewhere once about how Mark's house didn't look like a professor lived there because there should be a glut of books everywhere, and this is where we saw them. He really quit his whole life and career when she died, threw out all the books, seemingly everything he owned. He severed himself before Lumon did.

And I've never seen anything like that stellar shot of Mark at the door, not opening it, as the darkness crawls down his face like a fog of despair. Gagné said LIGHTING BITCH. 🙌

The testing floor stuff was Sick in both senses of the word. I literally can't imagine living only for dental appointments. She should bite him. She should bite all of them. Just when you think Lumon can't get more evil. No sympathy for Helena. Only biting. GEMMA BITE. GEMMA SMASH.

(And Sandra Bernhard! What are you doing here! Hi Sandra!)

Have no idea how they're gonna land this thing.

[bbyg4rl]

could i request a one-shot where kook!reader gets cheated on by kelce so as revenge, she decides to fuck jj maybank, the kook's worst enemy and number 1 hater, at a party. jj gets such a big head about it, teases her a lot and makes her beg for it but then delivers, they fuck against kelce's car, maybe even get caught right after they finish

fuck around and find out

cw: jj x reader, no established relationship, cheating, smut, public sex, getting caught

summary: inspired by request, MDNI

< public sex, teasing, degradation, cheating, dry humping, kinda mean!jj, reader's lowk a girlboss (i love her) >

a/n: so sorry it took me so long to finish this lol i had to rewrite it like a bunch of times and im still not sure if i like it..

"What?" The question burst from his mouth, borderling a scream. In what world would the kook princesa ever want him?

"Fuck me" You stated as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, your face devoid of emotion—a stark contrast to his own bewildered one.

"W-why?" he shuddered. "Aren't you dating Kelce?"

"You see him?" You said pointing to your drunk boyfriend rubbing himself up on the second girl he saw at the party you were at.

"So, I'm what? revenge?" he drawled, a hint of smugness creeping into his voice as he regained his composure after the bomb you'd just dropped on him.

"What other reason would I have to fuck you Maybank?" You sneer at him, clearly annoyed at how much time it was taking the blonde to just get to business.

"Right." JJ states, snatching the red glass from your hand. He downs both your drinks in one go before throwing them over his shoulder. "Let's go then."

His hand connects with your wrist as he leads you outside the house, cutting through the partygoers. Even passing by your boyfriend. You couldn't help but feel a little sorry, whether it was for yourself or for him you weren't sure of. But a pit settled into your stomach seeing Kelce grind against some girl he'd met less than an hour ago.

You painfully tear your eyes away from your boyfriend and focus on the back of JJ's head as he leads you toward the fleet of cars parked in front of the house.

JJ stops in front of Kelce's car, his hand pulls you forward so that you're standing caged between your boyfriend's car and him.

"So many guys at the party and you only found me?" He asks you, He's clearly amused with the opportunity you're presenting him with.

"If you don't wanna do it ill just go find someone else." You spit back at him. You try to wiggle out of his hold but he's too strong, he pushes himself further into your space. A smirk plasters itself onto him as he looks down at you, "You're not going anywhere darling.", he hums into your hair.

His hand wraps itself around your throat as he pushes you down onto your knees.

"You want me to fuck you, you're gonna have to earn it princess"

He's trying to challenge you, you could tell. He's trying to push your buttons. See how far you're really willing to go for your revenge. Unfortunately for him, you've never been someone to walk away from a challenge. You loop your hands through his belt loops and pull him forward, your face now dangerously close to his growing erection. You can feel the heat radiating out of his pants as you palm him.

JJ chuckles from above as an idea makes it's way into his head. He places his hand on the back of your head and pushes you forward into his crotch, He grinds his clothed dick against your face, smearing your makeup against his shorts as he ruts against you.

"aw princess." he taunted with a tug at your hair, forcing you to moan into his shorts. "bet your little boyfriend don't use you like this."

And he was right. Kelce barely showed interest in you. You were nothing but a trophy to him. Something to show off to his friends and ignore behind closed doors.

You feel your panties getting slicker at how rough JJ was with you. How he didn't shy away from using your body for his pleasure with no regard to where you were. It was hot.

The thrill of knowing anyone could walk by and watch as your face got humped out in the open only turned you on more. You place your hands on JJ's thighs as you try to regain some control, the heat in between your own thighs becoming too intense to be left unattended.

You push yourself off of JJ and stare up at him, pleading eyes silently begging him to relieve the pressure building in you. He smiles down at you, admiring your ruined makeup and the way your sticky lip gloss smeared across your face and his shorts.

"you jus' need some good dick to fill you up, dont ya?"

He motions for you to stand up, wasting no time in pinning you against the car once more.

"You want it?" He purrs into your ear, his hands falling down to your waist, tracing small shapes against your exposed skin. You nod as an answer to his question, You wanted it. Revenge or not, the way JJ had you right now made you want to eat him up.

"How bad you want it?" He asks you as his eyes bore holes into your own. He's challenging you again. He's not a kook lover. If you want something from him- you're gonna have to earn it.

"Please-" you whimper. Your previous brattiness cracks under his intense gaze.

"I didnt catch you." JJ teases, amused at the way your eyes leave his to look down at the ground, He loves having this power over you, A kook, And someone else's girlfriend.

"JJ please-" you whine at him. Frustrated with his teasing. He doesnt need to be asked twice, he quickly turns you around, his hips grind into you from behind.

He pulls your shorts down harshly, pooling them at your ankles as he hooks his hands into your panties. A sharp rip brings your attention down to where his hands were placed. He's ripped your underwear. You try to protest but he quickly shuts you up with a kiss.

"This is mine now baby." He says, shoving the ripped fabric in his back pocket and undoes his own shorts.

He's almost in a frenzy as he aligns himself with you. His rings dig into the sides of your thigh as he tears your legs apart enough to slot himself in between. He slowly pushes his tip in, stretching your walls out painfully. He thrusts into you inch by inch, giving you time to adjust to his length.

"For someone whos using me for revenge, this pussy's squeezing me real tight princess." He groans into you from where his head is placed in the crook of your neck. You can't help but moan as his thrusts increase in speed.

"Take it like a good girl." He coos into your shoulder nipping at your skin. He leaves purple hickeys ranging from your neck to shoulder blade. He runs his tongue over his work in an attempt to soothe the feel of your skin on fire.

He detaches his hands from their place on your thighs to undo your top. Your breasts spill out, now bouncing up and down in time with his thrusts. He presses you harder against Kelce's car. Your hardened nipples rub frantically against the cold glass of the car as JJ fucks up into you.

His ringed fingers find purpose in between your folds as he rubs sloppy circles onto your clit, sending shockwaves through your body. You're quickly being pulled over the edge as he eggs you on with deep groans and sweet praises against your neck.

"Come on baby, I can feel how close you are. Give it to me"

He sucks and nibbles against your sensitive skin as you spasm around his dick, your orgasm hits you like a freight train. Your knees buckle and you slump against him. He holds you up as he chases his own climax, drilling himself into you as if he's in heat.

His fingers find your clit again as he nears his own release, "You can give me another yeah?" he urges you, sending you down the cliff again, you feel the coil in your stomach snap and gush around him. The feel of your walls clamping down on him flings him down his own cliff almost instantly. He lodges himself deeper into you as he paints your walls with his release.

He pulls your shorts back up, his hands lazily trace around the wet spot that his leaking cum makes in the seam of your shorts.

"go show that fucker this." he hums against you, palming you through your shorts.

He holds you and himself up against the car as you catch your breaths, suddenly you hear your name being called by a familiar voice- Kelce's. Your eyes snap open as you're pulled back from your high and into reality. His eyes examine you as you lean against his car, JJ's cum which was now leaking from the side of your shorts onto your thigh is all the incentive he needs to reach a conclusion.

Kelce is left paralysed as the reality of the situation dawns on him. His girlfriend, His priced possession, was just tainted by a pogue. He opens his mouth but he's instantly cut off by you.

"You fuck around, You find out" You say with a forced smile on your face. You turn to face JJ who'd been silently watching the interaction between you and your now clearly ex boyfriend. You give his cheek a few taps before walking back into the party feeling satisfied with yourself. Leaving the two boys to look at eachother stunned.

check out my other works ! masterlist

[lovefender76]

study day

steve helps you at the library!

you had desperately begged steve to go with you to the library for the past 3 days and he finally caved, assuring you he’d help you search for the book you so desperately needed for the paper you were writing. he knew how stressed you could get when doing an assignment for school, wanting it to be the very best and so steve felt obligated to not only help you but decrease the stress you felt.

you both pulled up outside the local library in steve’s bmw, you had offered to walk but steve argued. “your bound to pick up more than one book, we’ll just take the car” it was a fair argument and it had happened once or twice before. you scoured the bookshelves after directing steve to check the opposite end of the library thinking that would lessen the time spent away from your work. that was until someone whispered in your ear “i’m bored”, you turned to see steve pouting at your side. you giggled before pressing your hand to your mouth, “you can wait in the car”. steve dramatically shook his head at your response “i’ll just stay by your side” he spoke softly slotting his hand into the back pocket of your jeans.

eventually you found the book, pulling it from the bookshelf and proudly showing steve who silently cheered. moving back to the front desk you checked out the book noticing that steve had picked one out for himself as well. you made your way back to the car, steve following closely behind you “i’m proud of you” he called after you. you turned with a questioning look on your face “huh”, “you only picked up one” he remarked. “maybe i’m getting sick” you chirped sarcastically, pretending to check your own temperature. steve came up behind you wrapping his arms around you, “you should probably rest straight away then,” he murmured in your ear “can’t have you getting ill now”.

once you got back to steve’s house you immediately got to work in his living room making notes of different points you could make throughout your paper and writing down the corresponding pages that support them. you were less than 15 minutes into the task when steve crashed down beside you “you need to rest” he claimed. you gently pushed him away “just give me 10 more minutes and i promise i’m all yours”, steve grumbled at this but relented knowing pressing you would only extend the amount of time you worked.

ten minutes later steve whined, he had been patient all day and so you dropped your pen down. turning to him ready to give him all your attention steve surprised you; “do you want to read your ideas out to me? sometimes actually saying them helps you make more sense of them” he offered. you smiled sweetly at him, feeling beyond grateful that you had been blessed with such a thoughtful boyfriend before nodding- picking up the notepad you read out what you had wrote down eyeing steve every so often to see him nodding his head as he listened to you speak.

“you’re going to smash this y’know” steve commented after you got through your list, you smiled leaning into him “thank you so much for your help today” you told him. he hummed in response as you both curled into each other more than ready to settle down for the evening.

[theconstitutionisgayculture]

So what exactly happened? That's a good question because I have no idea what Zelensky was thinking. This was not a situation where President Donald Trump was beating him over the head or demanding he submit to a specific narrative surrounding the war in Ukraine. On the contrary, the meeting was essentially over when Zelensky decided it'd be a great idea to try to publicly embarrass Trump and Vice President JD Vance in front of the press. The sticking point appeared to be Vance, who was wrapping up the press conference, mentioning diplomacy being a means to end the war. Zelensky, for whatever reason, took great offense at that suggestion and asked the vice president if he could ask him a question. The Ukrainian president then leaned forward and began to dismiss the idea of a ceasefire, citing deals that Russia has broken in the past. That's when things touched off, with Zelensky and Vance going back and forth. 

...

This was a colossal miscalculation by Zelensky. Trump has never accepted the idea that Ukraine is doing the United States a favor by fighting Russia as a way of justifying unlimited aid. Perhaps Joe Biden found that argument persuasive, but Joe Biden is not in office anymore. Russia is not going to invade the United States or any NATO country (if for no other reason than a lack of capability), and using that as a type of blackmail for support was never going to play.  Here's the deal. Fairness or being "right" doesn't factor into a situation like this. Zelensky is in a desperate spot, and Trump had largely acquiesced to a very Ukraine-friendly deal over the last few days (including lowering the repayment amount to just $90 billion). The negotiations were over. All the Ukrainian president had to do was show up, shake hands, smile for the cameras, and sign the deal. His attempt to lecture Trump and Vance for the cameras was an ego move that he didn't have the leverage to pull off.  Trump does not care about the press. You aren't going to bully him into a certain point of view by appealing to CNN or any other legacy news outlet. Whether that's fair or not is irrelevant. What's relevant is the reality of the moment, and Zelensky chose to pick a fight with Vance when it was completely unnecessary. Liz Cheney and David Frum may do performative outrage online, but they are not going to cut a check to Ukraine. Zelensky needed this deal and chose to blow it up for no good reason. What was the point of him even coming to the White House if he was going to publicly denounce any possible ceasefire?  What this really comes down to is how Zelensky handled this. If he has issues with Trump negotiating a deal with Putin, then he should express those behind closed doors, which is something Vance pointed out during the exchange. By trying to embarrass and undermine the U.S. president in public, he destroyed an already frayed relationship. In doing so, he might have cost his country its war. 

Zelensky is a fucking idiot. He doesn't realize he's not dealing with Biden's interns anymore. Trump and Vance aren't going to be awed by his faux-combat gear aesthetic and his tough guy posturing while he play acts as a war general. They don't see Russia as an invincible Sauron-esque boogeyman being held back from world domination by the brave stalwart forces of Gondor Ukraine. They understand that Putin is bankrupting his country failing to fully conquer Ukraine. They know that Russia is having to recommission museum tanks and send them to the frontlines because they're in dire need of armor. Russia is no threat to anyone outside of small, non-NATO countries like Ukraine, and even those countries can put up a good fight. War with Russia is never coming to US shores. The only way American soldiers and Russian soldiers exchange fire is if the US sends troops overseas to fight in another foreign war that has nothing to do with us. Zelensky is so used to western leaders falling over themselves to cozy up to him in the media that he stupidly thought calling Trump out in front of cameras would get him to play nice and take his scolding like a good little Eurotard weakling. But Trump has never played nice for the media. And he's never pulled his punches when it comes to European leaders and the bullshit games they play. If you want to temper Trump, you do it behind closed doors. That's where Trump negotiates. You call him out in public, he's going to Little Rocket Man your ass until you come crawling to him on hands and knees begging for him to stop.

Zelensky is a theater kid playing at being a wartime leader. He's squandered so many chances to end this war and save his people from continued death and he passes them all up because he wants to be the brave leader who beat Putin and conquered Russia. He's a comedian who has no idea what it means to actually be a leader. And when he comes crawling back to Trump, because he will come crawling back, he's going to be lucky if all he has to pay is the $500 billion in mineral rights Trump originally wanted.

[genshingorlsrevengeance]

I would like to humbly request any Genshin Pyro ladies of your choice warming up their S/O with their Visions.

(Genshin Impact) Amber, Xinyan, Dehya, Hu Tao, Yoimiya warming their S/O with their Vision

Amber knows how to warm S/O up!

She lights one of her arrows on fire light the fireplace, smiling proudly at herself.

(Amber) "Hah! I knew I should've tried that a long time ago!"

S/O chuckled, moving their seat closer as they turned to Amber.

(S/O) "You mean this is the first time you've tried it?"

(Amber) "My Vision keeps me warm usually, so I've never really had a need to!"

(S/O) "...Fair point."

Amber sat with S/O, snuggling closer to them, her smile growing bigger.

(S/O) "Thank you dear.~"

(Amber) "Hehe...! Want me to make you a baron bunny blanket?"

(S/O) "As long as it doesn't explode...wait, can you make something like that explode?"

(Amber) "I...dunno, actually. Hm, that sounds kinda cool!"

Xinyan's first move was to grab an extra blanket for S/O, like a normal person.

Until S/O spoke up.

(S/O) "Wait...can you use your vision to make it a little warmer?"

(Xinyan) "My visi-?...Now, why in the heck would I use my vision to warm ya up when I could just getcha 'nother layer?"

(S/O) "So you don't have to get up...!"

(Xinyan) "...Ya just wanna see if yer idea works, don'tcha?"

(S/O) "Would you say no if I said yes?"

Xinyan sighs and decides to tap into it, ever so slightly so she doesn't burn S/O and the rest of the house down.

And much to her own surprise, the warmth emanating from her body worked like a charm for S/O.

(Xinyan) "Well, I guess if it ain't dumb if it works..."

(S/O) "Hey, what better way to sleep off the cold with my very hot girlfriend?"

(Xinyan) "Did ya go the trouble of asking me just to make that dang pun?!"

Dehya wasn't surprised S/O was cold. Nights in the desert was unforgivingly frigid.

Even inside their tent and sleeping bags, S/O was shivering. Dehya meanwhile was relatively fine, surprising given the lack of clothes she normally wears.

Then again, she was used to this by now.

So, she scooted closer to S/O and used her vision to warm the tent up subtly, smiling once she saw their shivering stop.

(Dehya) "Much better, huh?"

She knew they couldn't hear her, so Dehya just kisses their cheek and rolls onto her back, smiling and falling asleep.

Dehya never thought her Vision could help with something so small, but now she was glad more than ever to have it.

Hu Tao just wants to give S/O a heart attack by shooting out a sudden flame.

(Hu Tao) "Cold? No you're not!-"

S/O yelps once a small flame shoots past them and onto the candle.

(S/O) "What the heck are you doing?! We're inside!"

(Hu Tao) "I know! That's why I did it!"

S/O sighed, shaking their head while Hu Tao simply laughed.

(S/O) "I swear...-"

(Hu Tao) "I'm not hearing a thank you, S/O!"

(S/O) "I'll thank you to not burn the house down, Hu Tao."

(Hu Tao) "Your welcome, I can do it any time!"

(S/O) sigh

Yoimiya used her Vision to light up her fireworks all the time!

But she never really thought about it using it like a heater at night, though that was mostly due to Inazuma's climate in general.

S/O was cold, them hogging the blanket being a telltale sign.

And so, Yoimiya knew what to do!

She closed her eyes and focused the power from her vision-

Accidentally setting off a firework that was outside rocketing into the sky and startling them both awake.

The power was a little too intense it seemed.

(S/O) "W-WHA?!...Ugh, Yoimiya...!-"

(Yoimiya) "H-Hey! I swear this time it wasn't on purpose! I just wanted to get you a little warmer!"

(S/O) "It's appreciated sweetie but...I thought you got all the fireworks put away."

(Yoimiya) "I...hah, guess I didn't...?"

S/O just rolled over and hugged Yoimiya tighter, a tired chuckle escaping their lips.

(S/O) "I think this can warm me up too."

(Yoimiya) "Hm...Yeah, I think I like this better too..."

Next time, she was triple check if there was anything outside that could be lit and prevent it from ruining her romantic moment!