#so I feel like I am stuck here
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feeling sooooo stressed out 🙃
#I hate this so much#writing my dissertation is quite literally ruining me#I can’t get anything done#and I’m punishing myself by not letting myself do anything else#I hate being at home so much#but I have so much anxiety about going to my flat at uni#so I feel like I am stuck here#and there isn’t even a proper desk here so I just have to lie in bed all day staring at a blank word document on my laptop#and the closest cafe is 30 minutes away and I can’t drive#I would need to take 3 buses and it would take almost 1 hour to get there#yes I live in the middle of no where :)#these are such first world problems but I feel sooo stuck right now and I don’t know what to do
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Agust D → D-2 → D-DAY
#yoongi#bts#agust d#userbangtan#btsgif#suga#min yoongi#btsedit#myedit#mygifs#it took me so many hours to plan and make this lmao#BUT I LOVVED IT#cant wait for the next mv bc it is obvious that yoongi saw someone at the end of the mv#and i think agust d stuck in a loop and he will murder his past self all the time dsakljsdkdj#idk why i think of that it just that when he pointed the gun at fbi agust d that guy smirked probably because he did the same to the#previous agust d who also smirked while going down the stairs before he ordered the others to kill him#like i feel when he saw yoongi he was like damn karma#dslkkdsad#the gifs are in no order of the mvs they are in order of color KINDAAA also i didnt add people pt2 for a reason i am lazy to type it here he
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they are friends :^)
#i feel like this duo in particular doesnt get enough attention so here i am. giving them attention#i have. a lot of thoughts about them. very few are coherent#i tried to put a very specific emotion into this piece that i dont really know how to explain so. i hope it comes across???#also the framing is really bad i know but it looked weird when i cropped it.#sorry. we're stuck with it being off centre#my artwork#jrwi#jrwi fanart#jrwi pd#prime defenders#jrwi vyncent#jrwi dakota#vyncent sol#dakota cole#jrwi prime defenders#prime defenders fanart#just roll with it#just roll with it fanart
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#since I did a fast eloise only sketch yesterday#here are some Sebastians😇🙏#he got tired after sneaking into the restricted section and…I feel like classes are kind of boring to him#I’m almost done with the most wretched book ever🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏#it’s so terrible and depressing I am just hate-finishing it at this point#it just solidifies in me that I was just meant to read old books over and over again lol#like…this book is SUPPOSEDLY really popular and I DONT GET IT !!!#I also HATED The Overstory which is also popular…it’s weird though#bc the first part was genuinely one of my favorite things I’ve ever read#so i stuck with the rest in the hope it would keep that momentum and it…didn’t…#oh well I just keep reading and rereading novels I already know I’ll like😇😇 and avoid this author forever and ever 🙏#hogwarts legacy#hogwarts legacy fanart#hphl#hogwarts legacy oc#hogwarts legacy mc#sebastian sallow#sebastian sallow fanart
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NAHO, toa Mangai of water (4/11)
Running along the cliffside waterways of Ga-Metru, toa Naho's work is never done, no matter how many matoran she saves. A distant--if watchful--hero, Naho has become a bit of a folk legend in the waning years of the Mangai's vigil. Striking at the opportune time, she is a surprise to allies and enemies alike, disappearing back into the mist once her job is done.
She wears the great Huna and wields a High-Pressure Launcher, concentrated blasts of water aiding in her acrobatic traversal of the city.
#I think back at the time I did the three previous Mangai in like. Less than a week then got stuck on Naho for a month#And while I still feel a little shmeep shmorp about the yellow#I am sold at this point#All headcannon characters from here on out#So that will be fun#Bionicle#Toa#Toa Naho#Naho#Toa Mangai#Mangai#LEGO#Metru-nui#MNOG#Mata nui online game#Art#My art
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okay .. take two !!!
+ bonus doodles
#i !!!! like this design a lot more#kinda worried abt the cloak …. but !!!#what do we think ………..#oh. wait. also#-> tried to combine the v shape and the cloak#figured out how to incorporate the bottom half wing like design#they have tails !!! they like to sometimes pretend it’s like a bird#(loop running around bc swish swish flowy) (bats their eyelash) am i not the prettiest bird youve ever seen#also while the leg straps for knife was cool#i feel they. while it wouldd be easier to maybe access#anyone could take it !!! the way it was !!!!#into the holster and belt you go#OH and and#the little chains and pendants dangling from the belt ?? those are like keychains from all the things that remind them of their journeys#OH and they’re wearing. kind of leggings ??? for better agility#im trying not to overdo everything. so that it’s not so cluttered#but that. also Is this point. as fun as this outfit is most of it is just loop taking clothing items they first see and running off#“okay rogue time. i can do rogue.” tthey are a mess <3#they’re kinda in that stage of. between siffrin and figuring out who They are now after all of that. clinging slightly while also changing#(they absolutely did steal those little pins from sif btw <3) they thought it would be funny to see how long it took for him to notice. and#then it just stuck.#“why is loop okay with the cloak now?” bc !!! its not a one to one. and also. sif here found loop at possibly the worst spiral ever#it Would have brought equal comfort as it did discomfort if they wore both the hat and cloak then. and (their words) it would be much easier#to tell which siffrin was who !!!!!!!!!!#agh .. okay#lantern’s art corner#isat spoilers#isat
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light of kshahrewar ✨
#genshin impact#kaveh#genshin kaveh#genshin fanart#stuff and things#userpharawee#sorry for the absence and lack of. well. anything really#I swear I'm still here it's just#I am once again stuck in capitalist Hell over the summer so my creativity is being drained one customer at a time#and oh my god there are sO MANY CUSTOMERS#it's only been a few weeks and I'm already utterly exhausted lol#but I finally managed to get some doodling in after not drawing for what feels like forever T_T#it's not much and it's not what most of you are here for but it is what it is
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i've been doing a bunch of tartarus runs in reload lately, and it got me thinking about how i miss certain ways FES's clunky gameplay can characterize minato… (ramble about the great clock mechanic + leveling up party members in reload vs fes under the cut)
when i got to yabbashah block in tartarus (block 3), i remember commending the developers for adding the great clock mechanic. it's a much more convenient way to keep party members at the protagonist's level- so when you think about p3 from the perspective of trying to make it easier for people to play, the mechanic succeeds in this respect.
but now that i'm in adamah block, and that i've done lots of my once-a-month tartarus runs… i think that i got a little too dependent on it, and the way that i played through reload feels like a vastly different experience from how i played FES.
in reload, my party's levels are very lopsided. minato, yukari, akihiko, mitsuru, and fuuka are all level 90+, meanwhile junpei and aigis are at level 79, and then… poor ken and koromaru are at 71 and 64 respectively. (i never got to have a great clock for them…)
meanwhile, in FES, my party's levels were much more evenly distributed and were at least level 90. i did all of this manually for every monthly tartarus run because i enjoyed having options available for the taratarus guardians and monthly operations.
with how i perceive minato, i feel that the way i played FES feels more in-line with his character than me dawdling around waiting for the great clocks in reload.
FES's gameplay loop left me with the very strong impression that minato has to work twice as hard as everyone else in SEES does. it makes sense because, yeah, he's the leader, but something about having minato run through tartarus multiple times with different groups of people just to make sure that they are adequately prepared speaks volumes about his character, to me.
and while the tired mechanic is present in reload to some degree, most notably with allowing you to freely raise your courage stat when you visit edogawa after school… the tiredness system doesn't hit the same way that FES does, i think.
the way your party members in FES will call it quits when they return to the entrance floor at tartarus when they're tired, versus minato, in spite of all his tiredness and sickness, still pushes through tartarus because it's his responsibility…. idk!!! i miss that! i feel like this really hammers home the difference between minato and the rest of SEES, how minato doesn't really see himself as a human with needs worth respecting as long as he's useful to someone.
i don't think that tartarus being tedious (in FES especially) is not what most people would describe as fun, and i can respect people thinking it's a slog. but, regardless of how it feels to play, it doesn't change that FES's gameplay loop is a fundamental building block in how i perceive minato…
of course, i do recognize that you can just opt to NOT use the great clock in reload (and it's great when players are offered the choice to not partake in mechanics)! i definitely think that if someone really wanted to, they could manually level up party members, but i do feel that kind of playstyle isn't necessarily "incentivized" to the type of people who are into playing games for Having a Good Time. it's kind of like… "why would you do that when there's a much more convenient option available to you."
in any case! despite my woes, i do want to emphasize that i'm glad that reload has a much more smoother gameplay loop than the original P3 did, because it does make the game more accessible to people. having played both FES and reload, it feels very strongly apparent to me how the core gameplay formula of persona has really been refined in the past 18 years (to think og p3 was 2006 and reload is 2024.. time flies!). and reload has made revisiting a story that i love so dearly much, much easier because the gameplay just bops!
at the same time, due to my "i miss characterization informed by weird and dated FES gameplay quirks" woes, i still think that playing FES is worthwhile. (really, i feel this way about all iterations of p3! i think it's worthwhile to see what each version and side media has to say even if it doesn't Land™ for you.) but i also understand why people wouldn't want to play it, so i will keep writing posts about things i liked from FES's gameplay because i'm still very fond of FES (especially in respects to minato. these mechanics are so telling about him!!!) 💪
#lizzy speaks#persona 3#persona 3 reload#<- specifically mentions of mechanics. no added story content just tartarus talk#minato arisato#today on lizz life: lizz wakes up THINKING about minato for the NTH time and is compelled to write a tumblr post about it#tartarus in reload is excellent looking and fun but i keep thinking about what i liked about how FES characterizes minato so#here i am... LOL... with my 790 or so word ramble... im so normal about the blue boy#i needed to get my feelings out there somewhere i just could not stop thinking about HIM HE IS IN MY BRAIN 24/7#me playing reload last night like 'minato would not fucking wait for a great clock to make sure that SEES is adequately prepared.'#and yet my sloth brain awaits the great clock... LOL gameplay convenience is not lost on me#i'm stuck in tartarus rn im grinding rubies and stuff trying to get equipment so i can throw hands with elizabeth its going to be fun#im still not done with this game i continue to be haunted by tartarus i fucking love that tower unironically#uh usually id ramble more in tags but. go read my post!! because i like analyzing FES gameplay mechanics!! i am full of passion and love!
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Me rising from the dead after 3 months
#sin speaking#(yo what happened it was january yesterday)#(......H E L L O)#(guess who finally got their elvanse back lmao i feel like ive been trapped in the chalice dungeons for a thousand years)#(if u ever have imposter syndrome about having adhd. boy will missing ur meds make you think twice about that LOL)#(regret to inform you all that i have been violently obsessed with lop since it got patched in february and i replayed it. 8 times. lmao)#(i also regret to inform you that i have another new hunter. tragic. but i am not immune to choir propoganda.)#(good news though! i have some art stuff to post so look 4ward to that i guess lmao)#(SO SORRY IVE BEEN GONE SO GRATEFUL TO SEE ANYONE HAS STUCK AROUND i have missed being productive here....soooooo bad lmao)#(im not going to promise too much tho bc lmao god always strikes me down for my hubris but YEAH. HI 😀)
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Its 4 am, I should be sleeping but why is it that I just have the urge to draw and ship her with a pathetic nerd gf??
#that pathetic nerd gf is me#i watched the incredibles recently and suddenly i remembered that I am gay#but also she just kinda reminds me of jessica rabbit personality wise#shes so serious all the time until theres a vwry brief moment she was caught off guard and all her confidence were gone-#when she got sucker punched lol#also i literally wrote this on the fly i imagine like the nerd girl was the lead engineer for most of Syndrome's machine#like yes he is a genius sure but most of the technicalities were made by her#so like I imagine that one day while she and Mirage where in the same room#she was like “you could just leave this place yknow. idk what you see in him that makes you so devoted on building these intricate machines-#for him.“ and she went silent before mirage continued ”you could build for gods for superheroes but you choose to have yourself stuck-#in this volcano island for some rich megalomaniac who got hurt that some fat guy hurts his feelings decades ago“#and just as she was about to protest mirage asked again “what do you see yourself here?” and the nerd girl just kinda laughs and was like#“i dont really see any future here but all I know is he got his toys and I am having fun building it”#and mirage just couldn't help but laugh at her bluntness lol#but also it would be fun that she asked her the question back and mirage couldnt answer it either#its like working for syndrome just gave them both a purpose to live in a sense#i mean likeeee they both dont trust syndrome no no i mean like they have something to do other than wander aimlessly in their lives? idk#this should have been in this post why am i leaving it in the tags?????#anyway chat should I f/o her????#asuka speaks
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Six Ears, and being left.
#mhw09 personal#gif warning#*screaming into knees*#can I draw your attention to his HAND PLEASE#I didn't realize that was going to be a *thing*#that little WAVE#I paid subzero attention to the closing and it was because I was subconsciously protecting my heart apparently#listen to me listen#it's about 'and a double-edged sword cuts your heart in two'#torn between Stone Monkey and *gestures to everything else in his life* *like literally everything*#it's about Stone Monkey going where Six Ears can't follow#and where the line is between staying behind and being left behind#and so he's stuck in place. watching him leave. weights around his ankles.#whether those be his duty to his troop or the demons in his head#always holding back. always in-between. always feeling like he's going to lose *something*.#six ears and that fear that's inside him#I've only seen 11 episodes and have just One Major Spoiler in my pocket am I barking up the wrong tree? MAYBE#but here we are anyway#also Jade Rabbit looking at him in concern from the background! this missing scene is gold. too bad it's on eternal mute.
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I feel like I did this before a while ago but here goes again...
#realizing the star saga needs a major major overhaul#i've done too much world-building and am attached to many characters to let it go#but.... plot stuff needs to change#like a lot#i've been feeling stuck by the plot of the first book and it's just not right anymore#anyway#the point of all that is#i need to start working on something else#plotting other wips#so here we are
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malia x lydia
she smells like strawberry starbursts taste she looks like the photo that comes with the frame she makes my cherry red heart hurt i'll never unwrap her - strawberry starburst
#malydia#twedit#twrarepair#twfemslash#lydia x malia#this song has been stuck in my head and it randomly hit me as a sapphic yearning for lydia song. and i was like hmmm who's gay for lydia.#and so here i am. i made this in photopea and i feel insanely rusty but it needed to be made.#firmly inviting anyone who wants to make something better out of this idea to do it lmao.#otp: making me nervous#picspam#femslash
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eepy lil guy
#i cannot put into words the amount of love and affection i have for him. u do not understand. he is my SON im giving him a QUILT#the first character i think in my whole life that i have loved so deeply i wish he were real so i could tell him. i want adoption papers#i feel so bad i wish he didnt hafta suffer with the tired eepy. i want to get him uncursed i want him cured i want him to be free from sleep#the absolutely crushing guilt of how much he misses from being tired all the time sounds miserable i want to#i dont even know. i want to help. i am just a stupid lil lady on my phone how can i possibly help him from here. it sucks. im stuck behind t#he screen and theres nothing i can do. it KILLS me. like haha if i invite him to my guest room 1000 times maybe itll help. sobs#twisted wonderland#twst#twst silver#silver vanrouge#suntails
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Interest checking somethin' real quick!
*I couldn't think of a better way to word that, but I mean like. If I only opened comissions for stages sketches through flats, but you wanted shading, or something. Or if I end up deciding certain kinds of commissions won't work for me and have to put up restrictions.
The second I'm able I'm probably going to be opening them, so I'm just kinda feeling out where interest lies! I don't know how I'd be pricing things just yet, honestly? My brain seems kinda caught on "$5 for a quick sketch is a good starting point" but we'll see what happens, since I'm uncertain what the reasonable price escalation from there is to me- also, I have a tendency to go overboard on my sketches naturally, so. We'll See.
Another thing that'll probably be coming is a kofi for tips and requests! But do keep in mind that I just specified requests and not commissions- they'd be in no way guaranteed, I'd just feel a little more pressured on account of your kindness lol
#i want out of this nightmare country ✌️ have for years now but now that I'm medicated I feel way less defeatist abt this so- ya know- +#let's get the fuck outta this joint#(I realistically am still going to be stuck here for a while because of the destination I have in mind but I am Determined.)#(Got a feeling like I'm a snarling dog bearing its teeth as I size up my future- I'm taking it by force.)#ooc#txt#polls#posting it here and not to the art blog bc this has the more active follower base 💀 although I'll probably reblog it there later#(I am kinda thinking I will limit the stage of completion I'm willing to pursue at this time btw. fully realized pieces just take so long +#+and I get stressed out making people wait when it's nearly done by that point yknow? I'd totally be open to the idea of doing a com+#+ up to the flats stage and being paid for that and then maybe revisiting it later or something? again- we'll see.)#(it really kinda hinges on how many people are interested tbh)
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i need 2 clean my room but instead i just lay here everyday like this
#aa..g#it would b so easy i have nothing in it#only my bed and cat tree and elliptical#except for some garbage on the floor#the only problem is if i pick it up n put it (back) into a bag then i have to get rid of the bag before my cats can rip it apart again#but if i take it downstairs my mom will get mad at me for having had garbage in my room#so instead everyday i just look at it n get filled w dread#my room is almost always clean the rest of the time#which makes it feel like it's just an extension of how much worse my mental state n anxiety has gotten LMAO..#worried itll get bad again like my old room i had when i was 15#full of rot both me n everything in it#& i am so scared of that#even worse i have a migraine right now and i cant move#so i cant do anything about it#im just stuck here thinking of it n staring at it
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