#so I could talk about her more accurately in these polls
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Hello! I’m here today to tell you why I think you should vote for Iris Lovefeather from Tales of the Rays: Recollections! This might get long, so I’ll shove everything under the read more:
Now then, before we start I need to give you a bit of prior information:
What is tales of the rays?
Tales of the Rays is a mobile game that came out in early 2017, and follows in the footsteps of games like Tales of Link(Which another competitor, Sara, is from!) and Tales of Asteria.
(Image ID: Early art for tales of the rays. Ix and Mileena are closest to the screen, while an array of protagonists from previous mainline tales games stand behind them.)
The story features Ix Nieves and Mileena Weiss, two Mirrists who, after the destruction of their town, are tasked with restoring their world(Tir Na Nog) by building off of what’s left and replacing what can’t be saved. In order to do this they use their powers(creation, illusion, fusion) to recreate the land once destroyed. They do so via ‘exoflection’, a process where Ix will use his power(amplified by the kingdoms own machinery) to mimic and reimagine sections of other worlds to add to theirs! Through this process, a person known as a nexus will form. A nexus is any notable individual in that world, like, for instance, the main protagonists/antagonists of one of the mainline games within the tales series.
(Image ID: Yuri [far left] and Repede [far right] defending main character Ix [center] from a pack of monsters. The scene takes place in a forest.)
Once the land is exoflected, it’s up to Mileena and Ix to find the Nexuses, and get them to safety before an opposing organization, known as the Salvation Front, get to them first and take advantage of them! How does this tie into Iris, you ask? Well, 4 arcs later and Ix and Mileena’s stories have finally wrapped up, leading to Rays introducing a new set of main characters: Iris being one of them!
(Image ID: Official art for the current story arc of Tales of the Rays: Recollections. Ix and Mileena in their arc 3 and 4 outfits stand in the front, with larger shots of recollections protagonists, Kodama and Haze, are behind them.)
This story takes place a couple hundred years after the final arc of the original story, where the world Ix and Mileena touch so hard to save has been destroyed and taken over by creatures known as ‘wraiths’. Due to this destruction, only one true city remains within the world, only able to survive through a magic barrier that had been placed around it. While there are other, smaller, civilizations on the outside, they’re in much more danger, and are often looked down upon by those living within the barrier. This new story follows Kodama Atwood and his group, as they try to locate and destroy the source of these wraiths by working as the Reaper Knights, people trained to fight off the Wraiths, alongside the Immortal Queen Haze.
What about Iris?
As mentioned before, Iris is a part of this group, and thus, is also a Reaper Knight alongside Kodama. She also doubles as a songstress and performer, though her voice itself is synthetic.
(Image ID: Iris’ mirage arte. She’s in battle with a horde of monsters. One hand holds her megaphone as she shouts through it. The other holds her hammer.)
When she was younger, she and her grandfather were attacked by a wraith, leading to her grandfather’s death, and her losing her voice. Her grandfather had always been someone who loved beautiful things, and when he was still alive, would tell Iris her voice was very beautiful. While she’s not fond of her synthetic voice, she continues to use it in honor of her grandfather, using that voice to sing for the people in need and around her, to help lift their spirits.
(Image ID: Iris’ basic mirage arte. She’s smiling at the screen, with one arm extended towards it, megaphone in hand. Her hammer is directed away from the screen.)
So please vote for Iris! While there’s still not much to her yet- her story’s only just starting! And with a new chapter coming sometime soon, I may just have more information to give you by the time the next matches come around!
Pink Hair Swag Tourney, Round Two, Part One
#poll#polls#tales of the rays#Iris lovefeather#got it out in time!!!#so excited to talk about her!!!#especially because she’s sort of the reason I got back into tales of the rays#so I could talk about her more accurately in these polls#I know I’m mostly an a3 blog nowadays but I’d appreciate if you guys could show her some support!
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Caught Me Slippin' | escort!eddie au
(a/n) yes, this fic is based on the Kiss Quotient, and, therefore also Pretty Woman. Thanks to everyone who voted on the poll for me to work on this fic. I had a lot of fun with it! So, even though its a bit all over the place, haha, I hope you still like it.
If you want to see more of this fic, please send an ask and we can chat about it but Do Not Ask For Part 2. This is a One Shot.
Summary: [modern!au] feeling insecure about your skills in bed, you decide to find someone who could help you learn. Except, when the guy actually shows up, a mistake seems to have occurred. Fortunately, you're both quite adaptable (or, at least, you try to be), and the night quickly takes off into unexpected territories.
Word count: 13.2k
Warnings: SMUT. MINORS DNI. 18+ ONLY. dual POV. rich!female!reader. shorter than Eddie. self-consciousness. slight miscommunication - quickly resolved. swearing. drinking. awkwardness. [mention of infidelity, side characters]. non-monogamous relationship. smut. male sex work (obviously). slight dom! Eddie. inexperienced!reader. mentions of bdsm- bondage, sadomasochism. nipple piercings. nipple play. fingering. oral (f receiving). light pussy slapping. Eddie has an innocence kink. I'm probably not representing sex work 100% accurately, but this is [fan]fiction. You should always take it with a grain of salt. + apparently, kind of angsty, idk i guess I'm dead inside.
if you think I'm missing any warnings, please let me know, and I'll add them. if you do not like the sound of any of these- then this is not for you. do not read.
All the errors left unlearned, oh
But I am the luckiest guy
Not the loneliest guy in the world
- David Bowie, The Loneliest Guy
What the hell were you doing?
Sitting at a bar, which was mistake number two. One of many, for that matter. The third was ordering a drink you knew you wouldn’t drink but had picked when panic swooped over you as the bartender walked up. The red liquid looked quite pretty, but you could smell the alcohol the second the girl put the glass in front of you. An attempt at a sip was made, and you brought it to your lips, but the bitterness overwhelmed you.
There was one thing you had gotten right, and that was at least picking a bar that wasn’t crowded. The music played at just the right volume, and people kept to themselves, to their booths and their tables. You tried to let your mind wander off, not to overthink– that would only cause more anxiety– but it always went back to what the people around you were talking about. You never meant to be nosy, and you never butted in… but it was entertaining what random strangers had to say to each other.
— You’re shitting me.
— No, I’m serious. Sarah told me herself. She walked in, and there he was, fucking their pool boy.
The table behind you erupted in a chorus of gasps.
— Poor Sarah, though.
— Yeah, well, she had been sleeping with her yoga instructor.
How were people so comfortable talking about such things in public? Where everyone could listen in? You almost felt bad for this Sarah that her complicated marriage was being shared with the entirety of this small bar, surely then retold all across the city.
You glanced around you, side to side. The bar counter was quite long, with enough space for eight barstools to stand next to each other. Besides yours, four more were occupied. Having opted for the last chair, you were worried about someone sitting on one of your neighbouring chairs, but luck had been in your favour.
That is, until he showed up.
Your first, and probably, the biggest mistake that you made that night.
♤
From the second that Eddie sat down beside her, he could tell something was wrong. He always could with such things. As well as assume what might have been the cause of the problem.
Her eyes widened, nearly doubled in size, as he sat down next to her. He couldn’t have made a mistake; she had sent what she would look like and be wearing, and the description was accurate. She should have known what Eddie would look like as well; that’s basically what the whole selection was based on, look, and yet… the way she stared at him… he had the urge to wave his hand in front of her to make sure she wasn’t going into shock.
‘Hey,’ instead, he opted for a kind smile as he leaned against the bar, asking for a quick confirmation of her name, and took a moment to take her in properly while she defrosted and returned to reality. She was cute, to his surprise, definitely not the type he would usually be coming across these nights. Pretty and young, but mostly, shy. The bar was definitely not in her comfort zone, and he had picked up on that the second he noticed het sitting there, back stiff in nerves, drink untouched except for the little straw she stirred around in circles mindlessly. At first, he thought, maybe it’s all an act. The shy and naive girl next door, he was into it, but no. Now he knew better; she was terrified.
A few seconds later, when his eyes moved back up to her face, she spoke her first words.
‘Who are you?’
♤
There had been a mistake. There must have been. Whoever the guy sitting next to you was, he was not the guy you had paid for.
Jesus that sounded so stupid. How could you have been so dumb thinking it was a good idea to hire a guy for the night. As if that would make you feel better, make all your problems disappear.
The man blinked in confusion. Your reaction had clearly been a surprise. As he stumbled over his words, you took him in quickly.
Long brown hair fell over his shoulders in messy waves. He had layered up, but not for practicality. You couldn’t see how the leather jacket or the denim vest over a thin t-shirt would help him against the evening cold, not to mention his ribbed jeans. Overall he looked like he had been directly cut out of an 80s rock magazine. Sure, some women must be into that kind of look; you couldn’t even deny he was pretty attractive, but it was not what you had wanted. Not for now. You needed something simple. Comfortable. Easy.
Those large rings and metal chains were most definitely not comfortable. Or simple. Or easy.
Oh god.
♤
‘I’m Eddie,’ he stated, hoping it would clear something up, but her confused stare didn’t falter. ‘Didn’t you book…’ Eddie knew all the people around him were poking their noses into everyone’s business, so he tried to pick his words wisely, ‘... the appointment?’ Fuck, did he walk up to the wrong girl? He knew it would have been too good to be true to get an actual girl his age. People always lied on these forms. He was ready to apologise and walk away, but she answered.
‘I did.’ Her eyes wavered again over him. ‘But not you. There must have been some kind of mistake, I–’
‘Is everything good here?’ The bartender walked up, towel across her shoulder, her piercing blue eyes digging right through Eddie. Her question had been directed at the girl, and she nodded quickly.
‘All good, just a little misunderstanding.’
‘Alright then,’ The bartender sent Eddie another suspicious look before heading to the other side of the counter to take another order. This was fucking fantastic. Yeah, just great.
♤
‘Ok, so who did you think you were meeting?’ Eddie asked when the woman behind the bar walked away, slightly backing away from you, letting his shoulders fall.
You tried to remember the name of the guy who caught your attention last evening. Would the name mean anything to Eddie? You didn’t expect all these guys to hang around together...
‘Shit, yeah, ok, that makes sense.’ You could see all the puzzle pieces coming together behind his eyes. ‘He’s out on a date tonight as well. They must have sent us each other’s… wait,’ he quickly grabbed his phone.
♤
Eddie searched through his emails. It didn’t take long to ignore the few spam messages he had gotten since this morning. And there it was. The booking confirmation he had received. Having gotten them so often, he had read it on autopilot, not even realising that his own name was missing. All he had needed, he thought, was his client’s information. But there it was, literally the first two words of the email: Dear Steve…
Oh, the office would have a field day with this.
But some of him also could not wait to ask Steve how his date went.
♤
‘Yeah, they fucked it up,’ after a few seconds, Eddie had turned his phone around to show you an email. Even though you only needed the first two words to understand the mistake that occurred, you took the time to read as much of it as possible to make sure it was real. From what you could tell, it seemed legit. Just what business operated solemnly through emails… and apparently, not even automated ones.
‘I’m really sorry for the inconvenience,’ Eddie apologised as he pulled his phone back and placed it into his pocket. ‘I can call the office and get you a refund. I promise you that this is usually nothing of the standard we usually operate at.’ You appreciated his professionalism. Despite never thinking you were that judgemental, perhaps you had actually judged him a bit too harshly at first glance. And he was quite attractive…
‘No, wait,’ you stopped him before he could dial the number of his boss, or whoever was in charge. ‘Uhm… did your… friend… send you something? About his date?’ Steve was now, of course, also on the wrong job. Eddie looked up at you for a second, before glancing down again at his phone to check his notifications.
‘No, haven’t heard anything from him. I guess the other person didn’t seem to care which one of us they got.’ he chuckled, which surprised you. Did other people not care about who they slept with? You get to pick a person for a reason, don’t you?
‘I don’t need a refund.’ You stated after a short moment. Eddie glanced up once more.
‘Are you sure? It’s a lot of money–’
‘No, I mean, I would like to continue the night… with you.’ This was, for sure, getting out of your comfort zone, right? Being adventurous, getting a life, all that shit your friends nagged you about for years. Eddie smiled with the corner of his mouth.
‘Alright then, would you like to get out of here?’
‘Yes, please,’ you let out a sigh of relief. Thankfully, the volume in the space picked up quite a lot as more people entered, drowning out your conversation, but it was getting a bit too much for you. ‘Just… one minute.’ you stood up, heading to the bathroom, but Eddie called your attention for one more second.
‘You forgot your purse.’ he looked down at the ground where your bag was lying. You gave him an awkward smile and picked it up before making your way to the back of the bar.
Closing the stall door behind you, you wished for some decent internet; thankfully, it wasn’t the worst. You didn’t bother trying to be quick about it. There was no doubt in your mind that he knew you were looking him up online. With shaking hands, you typed in the name of the agency where you had found Steve. They had a list of all their “models”, as they nicely labelled them, and you scrolled through them. There was the guy you had planned on spending the night with. You had picked him because he looked sweet, and hot, obviously, but with enough cockiness thrown in the mix to tell you he knew what he was doing. And the little sales pitch the website had written up for him to sell the fantasy worked well. You didn’t bother rereading it now, but it was something to do with “the sweet jock that knows how to take care of his girl”. It was extremely cheesy, you were more than aware of that, but cheesy was good. It was safe.
Your friends would have probably laughed at you.
They probably would have picked out a guy like Eddie.
Speaking of the guy waiting for you at the bar, you found his profile. First thing first, the picture. That was definitely him; you recognised the unruly dark hair and brown eyes. He had several photos posted in his profile, like most of the men on the website, and they were of semi-professional quality: self-taken, but with a very nice camera and lighting. He had put effort into his presentation. First, there was the portrait, showing his handsome face, shirtless but cropped to the shoulder, revealing enough of the silver chain around his neck but not showing what was actually hanging off it.
The following picture was a full-body pose, with clothes on that were not significantly different from the ones he was wearing now. No denim vest, but a different leather jacket on top of a black shirt. Dark denim jeans with a belt, buckled by what looked like to be steel handcuffs… had he been wearing that tonight as well?
Your throat tightened up as you swiped to the next post, which was, of course, the obligatory nude. All the “models” had to have them, since that was basically what people paid for. If it wasn’t for the fact that the site saw itself as one of the “classier” agencies out there, the naked pictures would have been the only ones available. You, for one, appreciated the variety.
Eddie was posed on a bed, on his knees. With one hand in his hair, and the other over his thigh, he didn’t leave anything to the imagination. Despite not even looking at the camera, the smug smile on his face told you he knew exactly what he was doing. He got you looking, and he knew you liked it. Yet, what you couldn’t stop looking at were the tattoos that covered his pale skin. Dozens of them, at least, varying in size and style, covering most of his arms, upper legs, ribs…
You scrolled on, remembering he was still waiting for you outside, but the next picture didn’t make anything better.
It had been a session shot. You had stumbled across similar ones on your initial look at the website. The men posing out the act of some kind of intercourse. Different positions, different actions, whatever described their style in the profession. For Eddie, that included the shot of a naked woman in bed, the same bed in which he had taken the previous picture. Her limbs were spread apart, tied to the bed corners. Her eyes were covered with a black and white bandana, and the rest of the features tightened in bliss as Eddie was positioned between her legs. His mouth was right at her core. If that wasn’t enough, he had put some props up on display next to the woman; some extra handcuffs, a vibrator and what you assumed to be a flogger.
What the hell were you getting yourself into?
♤
She returned after a few minutes, and Eddie could immediately tell his assumption was right. The poor thing couldn’t look him in the face. She sat back down on the barstool, holding onto her purse, lip between her teeth and eyes on anything but him. Yeah, she had looked him up.
In all honesty, he thought it was a good thing. He didn’t care for people who didn’t do their research into things. Saying that, as quite a spontaneous person, you couldn’t jump into things head first all the time. Sometimes, it was important to test the waters. Make sure there were no sharks swimming around.
‘I paid for your drink,’ Eddie remembered. She looked at him, stunned.
‘Oh, you really didn’t have to.’ Did she seem apologetic?
‘Please, its the least I can do, for, you know, being the wrong guy and all.’ He smiled, hoping she would return the favour. The corner of her mouth curved up the smallest amount, still quite unsure of the situation.
‘Really, I–’ she was ready to get her wallet, most likely pay him back, but Eddie stopped her by placing his hand over hers. That made her freeze, look back up at him. Eddie felt two pairs of eyes on him. Hers, and the bartender behind him, most definitely reassessing the whole situation. Everything about this evening was going to shit. He could probably wave his perfect 5-star rating goodbye, it wouldn’t be the end of the world, but he for sure as hell was not going to get put on any registers tonight. However, trying to seduce a stranger into bed with him when he is so clearly not the type for this girl… why was he even trying so hard?
He didn’t like using the term “vanilla”, it got too much of a bad rep, but that is what she seemed to be. Her clothes weren’t flashy, not even considering for “outgoing”. She wasn’t the type to go out and hook up, let alone get an escort. He wasn’t surprised she had decided to go for a guy like Steve. But Steve wasn’t here; Eddie was. He now had the job of taking care of this girl in any way she wanted him to.
‘Ok, shall we?’ She took a deep breath as she got up.
‘Are you–’ maybe they should talk about this? He didn’t want her to do anything she wasn’t comfortable with.
‘C’mon,’ next thing he knew, she grabbed Eddie by the wrist and whisked him off the barstool, dragging him along outside. It was early in the year, but late in the evening. The air was crispy, and the wind blew harshly. Eddie had definitely not dressed warm enough for the night, but that would have been an understatement for her. She would freeze in a few minutes.
‘I got a room in the hotel just across the corner,’ she spoke, rather determined. Some people might have mistaken it for confidence, but Eddie saw the other signs. Her clenched jaw, her consistent avoidance of eye contact… she was putting on a brave face. And that’s how people get into situations they don’t want to be in.
If it had been warmer, he would have stopped them on the street, but he had to get her out of the cold, so he let the girl drag him across the sidewalk to the hotel's entrance. It was big. The warm lighting reflecting off of all the decor, giving it a golden glow.
She did not stop walking until they reached the elevator. She clicked the button, and the arrow above the doors pointed down. The numbers slowly descended from 14.
‘I know you looked me up.’ Eddie started, having no idea how to introduce the topic fluently.
‘Ok.’ She was biting her lip nervously.
‘So I know you know what my usual gig is.’ They both watched the numbers go down. 7… 6…
‘So we’re on the same page.’ She glanced up at him; he could see it in the reflection of the metal doors.
‘I don’t think we are.’ The elevator pinged open as Eddie said so. They walked inside.
‘What do you mean?’ She finally looked him in the eye, only momentarily, but he saw that some of her fear slowly faded as she pressed the button to her floor. 15.
‘That, yes, I usually am pretty rough with my clients,’ he couldn’t hide the smile on his face, but could anyone blame him? He enjoyed his work. ‘But that’s because they want me to be rough.’ He looked at her intensely. Not to intimidate her, but to show her the seriousness of his words. ‘I don’t do anything that you don’t want me to do. You paid for an evening with… well, not me, but it’s all the same. If you get your money’s worth from a good pounding, I’m more than happy to oblige. From cuddling and watching a movie? All fine by me.’
♤
It’s all the same.
But it wasn’t, was it? They weren’t all the same.
‘What about you?’ you asked just as the elevator opened on your floor. Eddie let you walk through first. Now, you couldn’t look away from him, letting your head almost spin around a whole 360 to get your glance at him.
‘What about me?’ He had his hands in his pockets. Suddenly there didn’t seem to be anything scary about him. His hair was soft. His jacket, while not exactly winter-weather proof, looked cozy. The patches on his vest were hand sawn. With an image of him sitting at home, sewing them on, one by one, you got a sudden urge to ask about them, but who did that? Surely, in your situation, questions like that were out of bounds.
‘What do you like?’
‘That doesn’t matter,’ he chuckled, which confused you.
‘Doesn’t it? I might not be the most knowledgeable about the whole sex thing, but… shouldn’t both people involved be getting off? Doesn’t that make it better?’ You had reached your door. Weirdly, from having focused on the conversation as you walked, you didn’t feel any nerves unlocking the door. The room was dark, and you switched the light on. The nerves still didn’t bubble up. You could do it.
‘I suppose so– wait, you’re not a virgin, are you?’
You shook your head no.
‘Ok. not that there is anything wrong with that. Everyone’s living life at their own pace, I just don’t feel comfortable with that kind of responsibility. No one’s first time should be with….’
‘A professional?’ you raised your eyebrow, suggesting a possibly more classy term for what he wanted to say.
‘Nice.’ He smiled, and made his way over to the bed. You watched him get comfortable on the edge as you took off your light jacket. Your arms were freezing from the cold air outside, but the hotel room was cosy. Not to mention, the nerves were heating you up once more by the second. This was it. Eddie spread his legs wide, almost calling for your eyes to look at his thighs and how they stretched the material of the jeans.
When your eyes moved back up to his face, you were terrified to see that he was staring right back at you, devouring you with his gaze. He definitely saw you checking him out. But it was becoming harder to concentrate when you looked at how his large hand grazed over the faint stubble on his face.
‘C’mere,’ he said with a nod, and thoughtlessly, you followed his order. Eddie took you by both hands once you were close enough and placed them on his shoulders, then let his hands settle on your waist. His eyes found yours for a quick check. When you gave him the green light with a smile, he immediately mirrored it and asked: ‘what were your plans for this magical evening?’ He briefly tightened his grip on you and kept moving his hands up and down lightly as you tried to respond. As if that wasn’t hard enough with his eyes staring deep into you.
‘No, uhm, nothing special.’ You didn’t need special. Special meany complicated, and you just needed someone to help you out with the basics.
‘Making it special is kind of my one job, you know,’ he pulled you in for a hug so that his face was only a few inches away from your stomach. His arms now enveloped your frame, hands comfortably positioned over your ass. A complete stranger was hiking up the hem of your shirt, touching your bare skin underneath it. ‘So, what is it that you want?’ When he pulled up enough of your shirt to actually reveal the skin underneath, he placed a soft kiss on your side. That feeling alone felt electric. He kept on leaving fluttering kisses over your middle. It was a strange sensation as well as a pleasing one. So simple, and yet it had a great effect that you couldn’t quite explain.
Your eyes fluttered shut as you tried to concentrate on Eddie’s question as his kisses continued. What did you want from this night? But should you tell him the complete truth? Wasn’t there some way to avoid the embarrassing details? Then again… how could he ever help you with your needs if he didn’t know what they were?
‘I want…’ you gasped lightly when his teeth grazed your skin. For some reason, that pushed you over the edge to just put everything you worried about out there. You were already here, in this hotel room, with him. Fuck it.
♤
‘I want you to help me be good at sex.’
Eddie didn’t mean to stop. He saw in her reaction that that had been the wrong thing to do. She must have seen his widened eyes and taken it for judgement, while really, it had just been a small surprise. He wasn’t exactly used to people asking him to teach them how to have sex.
‘Sorry, uhm, nevermind. Just ignore me.’ She scratched at her neck while looking away. That won’t do. Eddie had to fix this before they would do anything else.
‘No, wait. Let’s… let’s talk this through for a moment.’ He led her by the hand and let her sit on the bed next to him. ‘Get comfortable. Is there anything in the minibar?’ he noticed the small fridge in the closet across the room and hoped she would understand his question to ask permission to use the service provided in the room.
‘Go ahead, take anything you want.’
‘Living large, are we?’ He cocked his brow before making his way over to the minibar. The selection of drinks was quite understated for a place like they were in. two cheap beers, a small bottle of champagne and two sodas. From what he had gathered at the bar, she didn’t seem to be a big drinker, so he grabbed a beer and a soda can. ‘Here.’
‘Oh, thanks.’ She didn’t look up at him as she took the can from him. Fuck, what was she embarrassed for? He doubted she would speak up in the conversation by herself, so just started out with a question. ‘Why do you think you need help with sex?’ She said she wasn’t a virgin, so she’s had experience. With a glance at her hands, he saw no ring or sign of regular wear of one. That, of course, didn’t exclude the option of a boyfriend or a partner. Maybe even a guy she just wanted to impress. The possibilities were endless, and for some strange reason, at the thought of her having sex with someone else, a strange feeling started gnawing at Eddie’s guts.
‘Because I’ve had sex a few times and so far it’s been awful.’ She sighed. ‘But I know that, to get better at it, I would have to go and endure endless dates to find a guy who would want to sleep with me, but then what if I do meet a great guy but just put him off because I’m shit in the sack?’
‘Don’t you believe that, if you did really find the right guy, he would help you? Or not even mind your alleged lack of skills “in the sack”?’ Eddie asked, taking a sip of beer. She just looked at him with a look that told him everything. Right. Men are egoistic scum. She had a point.
‘Sorry, you must think I’m insane.’ She tapped on the top of the can. The metal ticking sounded hollow in the quiet room.
‘I really don’t.’ If it wasn’t for the fact that he had a moral spine, he would have happily told her about some of his other clients.
‘Yeah, but I’m just wasting your time talking your ears off with absolute nonsense,’ she tried to laugh at it, lessen the tension.
Eddie leaned over the bed on his elbow. ‘Don’t you know that escorts are the new therapists?’
‘Wasn’t that bartenders?’
‘I brought you your drink, didn’t I? Call it a 2-for-1 combo deal.’ He put his beer in the air for a toast and took another sip. ‘And I was serious earlier. You already paid for the whole night, so I’m all yours, sweetheart’ He hoped that didn’t sound dismissive. The last thing he wanted to do (again) was to upset or offend this girl, who genuinely looked and seemed amazing. The idea of her not being able to find someone for herself, having to go down the process of finding someone like him to make her feel good…
‘Are all the guys at your agency this nice?’ she looked up from the lip of her can, bringing his mind back into the room.
‘No, Steve is a giant dick,’ Eddie laughed.
‘Right, while you have one,’ she teased.
‘Ha. Funny.’ He pointed at her in appreciation before taking a sip of the beer. ‘But I suppose you’re not wrong.’ She had seen his pictures; she knew what he had in stock. He wondered what she thought of it– sure, she might not have been ready for his regular repertoire, but that didn’t mean “never”. But what he wanted to know the most, which felt like the biggest surprise, was what did she think of him? For the first time since he started this gig, he wondered what she thought of his appearance. Did she like his tattoos? Was his hair too long, maybe? Were his clothes too shabby? Perhaps it was because she had not actually picked him. She had chosen Steve.
Oh, Stevie. They couldn’t be more different.
‘Are you sure you’re ok with me… being here?’
♤
‘I am.’ You didn’t know what else to reply to that question. Of course, the night was not going anything like you had expected. Until two hours ago, you were planning to have some alright sex with, what you could describe as a “regular hot guy”. Instead, you were on the bed, fully clothed, drinking a coke next to a Metallica reject. Was it too late to still do any of the things you had initially paid for, or was the mood entirely ruined? Did people recover from going into highly personal and dramatic tangents in front of the escort they had hired?
‘Ok, cool. Just… making sure. Fair warning, I might do that a few more times through the night.’ The idea of still having an entire night to spend with Eddie made you really happy. Even if you didn’t know what to do with him in this small room. With a large king-sized bed in the middle, and not much else but the essential hotel decor, the room was perfect for exactly the reason you had booked it and not much else.
Just as you thought it was getting a bit too quiet between the two of you and had wanted to speak up with a question, Eddie opened his mouth to say something as well. So you also simultaneously apologised and let the other person say their piece.
‘No, go ahead,’ you nudged him. Whatever he had to say would probably lead the conversation better.
‘I was just wondering, when you said “help be good with sex”, which aspect are we talking about here? Just regular? Oral? Foreplay? Like, what are we talking about here?’
‘Uhm, pretty much everything.’ You winced at yourself. So far, all your attempts at intercourse had been not great. It always felt awkward and uncomfortable. The guys would get what they were there for and didn’t feel the need to wait around for more. And if it kept on happening, then the math was simple, wasn’t it? Just look at what the overlapping factor was in all the situations. It was eventually your friends one night, after a few bottles of wine, who suggested the idea of just hiring a guy to teach you what to do. It would be so much easier. No feelings, and they know what they are doing. Foolproof plan.
And somehow, you still managed to make things complicated and weird.
♤
‘Now see, I don’t believe that,’ Eddie smiled. There was no way she didn’t know how to do anything. Especially since most of it was just pure instinct. There is a reason why people call it “messing around”, and it’s not because of any guide or formula that one should be working off of to get it right.
‘Well, then you should ask the other guys.’ Again with that little smile, trying to undermine her own feelings.
‘No, fuck them. I bet they didn’t even make you cum.’ He accused. Her lack of response was enough of an answer. Eddie could bet his entire wage that she thought it was her fault they didn’t get her to climax and that… that actually pissed him off. How often had he had his clients tell him how their husbands, the men supposed to take care of them, never bothered to fulfil their one simple and honestly fucking delicious duty? A thought sparked in his mind, and he couldn’t keep back the grin that sprouted up with it.
‘What?’ she asked at the sight of his smile.
‘Have you ever?’
‘Ever what?’
‘Had a climax?’
‘Oh,’ the way she got shy talking about it, to Eddie’s embarrassment, turned him on. The best thing was they didn’t even have to play pretend. ‘I mean, I think?’
‘You think?’ He raised an eyebrow.
‘Yeah, sorry,’ she cleared her throat, ‘Uhm… I’ll just be right back.’ And having said that, she ran to the bathroom.
As she closed the door, Eddie pondered on the idea of undressing. It would speed things up, possibly breaking the icy wall that closed her off. With one naked person in the room, it was hard to think about much else, which meant less to worry about. But he didn’t think she would actually appreciate it. No, she needed to take it slow. And he would happily guide her through it all.
♤
You splashed some cold water in your face. There had been no reason for you to run out of the room like that except for being a total chicken. The way Eddie was so open and comfortable, talking about all of that… brought out a new fear in you. One you didn’t know you had. One you couldn’t even identify. You just knew you had to get out from under his gaze. Those big brown honey-glazed eyes.
Why the hell did you leave the room? He was sitting so close to you. Your legs were nearly touching. He still sat with his legs spread, basically inviting you to get between them. And what do you do? Run away.
You splashed some more water onto your face.
There wasn’t much makeup on your face to begin the night, and whatever you had left of your mascara and blush was wiped off with the towel you grabbed. One more look in the mirror to ensure no grey ink streaks down your cheeks, and you were ready to get out again.
Just one big breath in. and out.
The bathroom door handle moved silently, and you pulled the door open to be met with Eddie’s chest. He was standing right in front of you.
‘Oh, hi.’
‘Hey, just wanted to make sure you were ok in there.’ He knocked on the door frame in a delayed manner for extra effect. Knock knock. You noticed he had taken off his vest and jacket. Just in his t-shirt now. The sleeves ended right at his biceps, revealing the sleeves of tattoos he hid underneath all those removed layers.
‘So are you alright?’ he asked when you didn’t respond to what he had said earlier. The question pulled your thoughts out of the clouds and your head up to look him in the eye.
‘Yeah, yeah, just…’ your mouth was extremely dry. One more second and no words would be leaving it ever again. It was just gonna have to come out now. Then, with a quick exhale, you admitted. ‘I’ve never had an orgasm.’ From Eddie’s reaction, it didn’t seem to have been any news to him. Like it was the most normal conversation, which, given his job, it probably was. You tried to ignore the thought of him and the many women he must have helped.
‘Well, I would be more than honoured to change that for you.’ He took a step forward, and the proximity forced you to look up at him to see his eyes.
‘Is that a rehearsed line?’ Apparently, your one outburst of truth led to the pandora’s box in your brain, and now you couldn’t shut up, saying the first thing that came to your mind. And unfortunately, it was still filled with the images of him with other people; him making all of them feel ecstatic.
Luckily, Eddie laughed at your presumption. His head tilted back, and when it came back down, and his eyes were once again locked in with yours, his lips pulled up into a smirk. One of his hands found its way up to your cheek before he leaned in. you were ready for him to kiss you, but instead, his breath lingered over your skin. So close that you should have been able to touch him, and maybe you did. Because there was something that made your mind a thick haze, impossible to navigate through. Everything spun around you except for Eddie.
‘So what if I did rehearse it?’ his words hit your jaw as he hovered over you, then whispering directly into your, he asked: ‘What if I’ve already planned 10 different ways in which I want to make you writhe underneath me? Would you mind that?’ Would you mind?
Whatever for?
In a shaky breath, you spoke the only thing you could think of at the moment.
‘Kiss me.’
♤
Eddie didn’t need to be told twice.
He must have been grinning like an idiot, and he could only hope it didn’t put her off as he brought their lips together and kissed her. Deeply. Passionately.
The hair around her face was slightly wet, as was her jaw, telling him she had just spent the last minute splashing water in her face. She tasted sweet, like the coke she had been drinking earlier.
Her hand crept up to his collar, shyly grabbing at it and pulling it down, revealing the slightest inch of the tattoo on his clavicle. Not that she would see it, having closed her eyes the second their lips connected.
Eddie let one of his hands find its way back to her waist. Holding on to each other, they stumbled back onto the bed. She let out a whimper as Eddie’s knees hit the edge of the bed, and he fell backwards, taking her right down with him.
It was a slow tear-away, leaving both in a haze. Eddie watched her sit up straight, straddling him and keeping him locked. If she moved, she would feel how hard he was getting.
‘I assume kissing was not on the agenda of the lesson?’ He brushed some of his hair out of his face.
‘Well, if you have any tips–’ she tugged at the bottom of her shirt. A nervous habit, probably, but all Eddie could think about was how he wanted that material as far away from her as possible.
‘You’re joking, right?’ She must have been. The kiss, though brief, had been… he felt alive after it. His chest was tight as he caught his breath. ‘Fuck, c’mere.’ He pulled her right back. It might have only been one kiss, but it had been more than enough for him. He was already hooked.
♤
His lips were slightly chapped, but not in any way to make you feel uncomfortable. Nothing that some chapstick before going out into the cold couldn’t solve. You could smell the bitter beer he had just drank, and despite the drink having been cooled, it brought a warmth out in you. This heat swam over your cheeks and the parts of you that he held close. His hands were now back to playing with your shirt. The material was creeping up over your stomach, up up up…
♤
‘Can you take your shirt off first, please?’ she asked nervously once the second kiss parted. Her small voice sent sparks flying down Eddie’s body, directly to his dick.
‘Yeah, ‘course.’ All he could do was smile. She shuffled down his legs to give him space and remove the shirt. There was no way she didn’t feel how tight he was getting in his trousers, but she didn’t show any reaction to it, eyes focused on his chest. Eddie looked down at himself. He had almost forgotten about those.
‘You have piercings?’
He kept on forgetting to update his pictures on the website. It was such a hassle. Taking the time to plan it all in, preferably with someone else, so he could have some action shots. There was the editing, and then he would have to send them into the office so someone could actually upload them… he just couldn’t be bothered. As much as he was meant to keep his clients aware of what they were paying for, it was selfish of him to love their surprised reactions. Just now, the way her eyes immediately locked in on them in surprise. How her hand lightly fought against reaching for him.
‘You can touch them. It doesn’t hurt.’ He took her hand and placed it right over his chest. She immediately regained control over her body, and her finger lightly traced over the silver bar. Eddie’s body tightened for a second in bliss. ‘See? It feels fucking good, actually.’ He hadn’t meant to whisper the words out or for them to be so shaky. It was supposed to be a light joke to keep the tension away, yet it pulled the atmosphere down to something intense and sultry. Hopefully, it wouldn’t scare her away.
But she smiled and leaned in again for a featherlight kiss. Fuck, she could kiss. It was like a gift from the gods themselves. A little piece of heaven. If this was how she kissed every guy, Eddie couldn’t comprehend how they didn’t line up for more. And then her hand kept moving, slowly tracing the ink on his body. Her fingernails grazed over the drawings. Perhaps it was a placebo, but he had always considered the tattoos to be more sensitive than the rest of him. The soft touches made him shake in need of her.
‘What do you want me to do?’ he asked, nearly out of breath, mind spiralling with everything he wanted to do to her. He couldn’t keep it in a straight line anymore. Meanwhile, he was supposed to be the professional here. Meanwhile, she expected him to teach her… he was absolutely fucked.
And then her following words only made his situation worse.
‘Just tell me what to do, Eddie.’ Somehow, he missed the exact moment when her lips travelled down to his jaw. It must have been some kind of joke– there was no way this incredible woman did not know what she was doing.
‘Fuck, baby.’ He groaned. He actually groaned. Eddie never did that during his sessions. It just wasn’t something he thought he could do with his clients. It turns out he had never been this turned on by any of them.
It made sense. How often did he think up hour scenarios before meeting the ladies? How often did he imagine he was with someone else? He had thought that maybe, because of the rules of his job and the frequency of his sessions, that maybe sex just wasn’t really anything for him. Not that he didn’t enjoy his job or regretted ever going into the business… money was good, and he was good at what he did. Yet, it was still a job. And jobs could often tire a person out. Maybe he had become desensitised to it all.
But this proved all of his theories wrong. He was entirely in the moment. Aware of everything that was happening between him and her. Nothing between them was new, or necessarily exciting, and yet it felt like nothing he had felt before. Nothing but kissing sent him down a road he could never return from.
And now she wanted him to tell her what to do. Yes, in the teaching context, he understood. But was she even aware that this would not be that far from the ordinary things he did in his sessions if they had just removed that context? Just add in some leather and handcuffs.
‘Take your clothes off, baby.’ He spoke softly, not wanting to roll back into his regular role. This wasn’t that, he reminded himself. He didn’t want it to be that.
When she started to pull her shirt up, he quickly took over. ‘No, wait, go slower. Take your time.’ Fuck, please take your time, he internally cried out. He didn’t want this night to end. It all felt like a dream, and he didn’t want to get dressed and wake up. He didn’t want to leave because once he did, coming back was not an option for him.
♤
You followed his instruction, slowly pulling your shirt over your head. Focusing on him. Looking at him prevented you from getting too much into your head. After all, it was hard to think or worry about anything with someone like him, half-naked, under you. You traced his tattoos. They were all black and white, the ink scratchy and uneven on most as if done at home.
Not precisely stick and poke, but not from a studio either. A pull at your heartstrings made you think of how much money you had paid. How much he needed that money… See, hard to think of your own insecurities when looking at him.
Eddie moved up to lean on his elbow. You were sitting still for too long; he must have sensed something was off. With a gentle touch, he stroke your bare skin. You were both shirtless, though you still had your bra on; his hand was sneakily moving up to the strap over your back, ready to unclasp it.
‘What’s going on in that pretty head of yours, sweetheart.’ It must be some kind of trick he was pulling, something he learned over his experience on the job because of the way your whole body fluttered at the sound of the little nickname… it must be a trick. But there was nothing you could complain about either.
Once again, your mouth worked faster than your brain, and before you could tell yourself to shut up, you answered with the first question that came to your mind. ‘Do you do anything else… besides this?’ a second later, before he even had the time to react, you butted in with your own response. ‘That is probably way out of bounds. Sorry–’
‘Only a little bit,’ he was taking it lightly with a chuckle. Clearly, with no intention of stopping what the two of you had been doing, he littered your jaw and neck with kisses between his answer. ‘I’m in a band. But garage gigs don’t exactly pay the bills.’ You felt him tremble with a laugh against your neck. Eddie had by then sat up and kept you in place on his lap with a tight hold. As he kept kissing you, you let your body speak for itself, closing your eyes and trusting your instincts. Somehow you knew what felt right and what didn’t. Your hips moved of their own accord, grinding against Eddie. You tried not to think about what you were doing, knowing you would just start to freak out and freeze. Instead, you thought of Eddie on stage with his band, imagining him in all the different positions, trying to figure out which instrument fit him best.
As if he could read your mind, he said, ‘I play guitar.’ His hand had now officially made its mark on your bra, grabbing the backstrap, and wringing it until it unclasped.
‘That’s hot.’
‘Yeah?’ The bra snapped open. Eddie took it upon himself to slide the straps off your arms. You threw the item off to the side of the room, and Eddie didn’t waste a second to bring his attention to your breast.
♤
Had no one ever touched her properly?
All that Eddie did was kiss her tits, and she was almost coming undone. He felt a pang of terrible guilt on behalf of his entire sex. How the fuck did no one make her feel good… not only that. How did men make her feel as if she was the problem? That she had to step her game up and learn. If he ever got his hands on one of those assholes– woah. Calm down.
♤
‘Yeah,’ you gasped out the small word. ‘So- so hot.’ It was hard to keep a sentence straight when he had his full attention on your nipples.
One preoccupying his lips, while the other was cupped by his large hand. He was rough in his touches, pulling and squeezing, but not in any way that felt too much. On the contrary, you needed more. More of him.
He switched from one breast to the other in his movements. Then when he pulled away, he kissed you again. Then, he looked you in the eyes, a false seriousness covering his features.
‘So, let that be lesson one: foreplay. Extremely important before any kind of sex.’
‘But… I didn’t do anything?’ You blinked. It was true, wasn’t it? He had been doing most of the work; meanwhile, you hadn’t done anything for him. But Eddie frowned.
‘Oh, baby, you did plenty.’ His hand reached down to his own trousers. ‘You feel this?’ When you hesitated, he took your hand to guide it over his crotch, where you could clearly feel the outline of his dick. ‘Yeah, that’s all you, sweetheart.’ He was so cocky, so confident.
He kept on talking. ‘And let me ask you one more question.’ For this, he leaned in to almost whisper the words against your hot skin. ‘Are you wet?’
‘I don’t know.’
Eddie clicked his tongue in disapproval. ‘I think you do know, but let me check then, hmm?’ You weren’t sure how he did it, but he brought you underneath his body in one fell swing. You were now lying on the bed, and he slid down to sit on his knees at the end of the bed. ‘Professional opinion and all, right?’
‘Right.’ You hid your face in your hands to laugh. What the hell had you gotten yourself into?
Eddie reached for your hands, making you look down at him.
‘I wanna see your pretty face.’ But, God, speaking of pretty faces, his smile might have been one of the most beautiful sights in the world. He could have been a model, probably… and yet…
You didn’t want to look at him, however, when he started unzipping your trousers. The button opened up, and you heard the zipper move down, releasing the tension of the material around your waist. Eddie tapped your hip, telling you to move them up. Once you did so, with one big tug, he pulled the pants down to the middle of your thighs with one big tug. It took him three more to get them off entirely. The next second, the trousers were in the corner of the room, along with your shirts.
‘Oh, baby,’ his syllables were long, dramatic, playful. ‘You are fucking soaking through these.’ You felt your back stiffen at the feeling of his fingers on you. Two, his pointer and middle fingers, slowly tracing down over the thin cotton. Then he’d roll them back up, letting his knuckles press the slit.
‘Fuck, can’t wait to taste you– can I taste you, baby?’ He asked, eyes pleading you for it.
‘You don’t have to,’ you responded. The air in the room seemed to be turning colder and sent shivers over your arms.
‘I know I don’t have to.’ Eddie scoffed, teasing. ‘Let that be lesson two then: if a guy doesn’t want his mouth near your pussy, then you shouldn’t come anywhere near his dick.’ He growled out the last words, and his hand had such a tight grip on your panties, that, with one quick move, he tore the material in two.
♤
‘Eddie!’ she shouted.
‘Shit, sorry.’ He got too carried away in everything. ‘I’ll pay you back.’ That’s when he glanced down; it was like his memory was instantly wiped. ‘Oh, fuck yes. Fuck you got the cutest pussy I’ve ever seen.’ He left a kiss a few inches above it and slowly made his way down. His fingers returned to the slow up-and-down motion he had done before, and each time, he let himself go deeper. Her body tensed up, and breathing hitched in her throat until it came out in a soft moan.
‘That’s right,’ Eddie said before one last kiss on the most crucial spot. And this kiss lasted. After a few seconds, he practically made out with her clit, as his fingers entered her.
That is when her hand reached for his hair. The touch was enough to make him moan against her.
‘Oh fuck,’ she moaned loud, eyes tightly shut in pleasure. Keeping his fingers deep within her, Eddie mused:
‘That’s right, baby. Does it feel good?’
‘So good.’ She dug her nails through his hair, nudging him on to continue whatever he was doing.
♤
Even though you had not meant to pull at his hair, it was all much more of an impulsive action, Eddie groaned out against. He pulled you in closer, sending the vibrations from his body right through yours.
You had expected, thinking up this plan of hiring someone to teach you sex, that it would be much more formal. That the guy would give you step-by-step instructions on how to do things, tell you everything directly, and you would follow. Maybe that is how it would be with anyone else, but with Eddie, he made you feel it. Without saying a word, you knew how to listen to him. Through his reactions, you knew what to do. His moans encouraged you to pull his hair, to close your thighs around him. Meanwhile, your response spurred him to go, let his fingers move harder, his tongue slick deeper through you.
‘Fuck, Eddie, fuck.’ You felt that feeling inside you, the build-up. It wasn’t familiar, for you had only experienced it very few times, mostly on your own. This tension deep within you. It grew, quickly reaching its tipping point.
Eddie’s free hand fastened itself onto your leg; he seemed to have lost himself in you. Then his eyes moved up, locking right with yourself. A part of you wanted to take a picture of what you saw in front of you and cherish the memory forever. His honey-brown eyes glazed in need of you. This spark of all-knowing deviltry.
Your whole body tightened as you felt it coming, tighter and tighter, like a rubber band ready to snap.
But instead, Eddie let go of the band as he pulled away from you to accompany your last moan of his name.
A whimper left your mouth, and pleads were ready to follow it, begging him to not stop. Not now. Just a few more seconds.
‘Lesson number three,’ he wiped his mouth– which was glistening in the room's warm light– with his thumb but never wiping the smug smile off his face. ‘Tease, tease and tease. The longer you keep them waiting, the sweeter their reward will be.’
At this point, you could not imagine it being so sweet, as all you felt was a horribly empty feeling, deflating your insides by the second.
‘Everyone likes that?’ You asked.
‘Hmm, good question.’ Eddie got up to remove his belt. He made a spectacle out of it, sliding the whole strap from between the loops, then throwing it down to the ground. ‘It does probably depend on a person, what their limits are. How much they can last and take.’ Like a showman, he made you watch. Made you wait. ‘I’m sure some people would rather just get on to the final act.’
‘Not me?’ you asked as he pulled his jeans down along with his boxers.
Just like the picture.
‘Hmm,’ with a pondering expression, he fell down onto the mattress beside you. ‘Not you.’
‘What makes you say that?’ It took all your willpower to keep looking into his eyes. He, however, wasn’t as courteous. His eyes roamed over your naked body as his hand found its way back between your legs. A quick snap. He slapped your clit lightly, but it was enough to immediately sent a spark through you, nearly bringing you back to the spot of tension.
‘Just a hunch.’ He slapped you again.
♤
She was so fucking sensitive. Like a little porcelain doll.
For good measure, and the fact he couldn’t get enough of how her body moved when encountering intense pleasure, he gave that pussy a third and final snap. Maybe he would have kept going, he certainly had not felt like stopping any time soon, but it was when her hand reached for his. Fingers around his wrist. Her eyes closed lightly, mouth parted just a tiny bit, enough for her to whisper his name.
‘Eddie.’
‘What’s up, sweetheart,’ he leaned in his lips almost on her cheek again. She didn’t respond. ‘Lesson four: always use words. I don’t know what you really want unless you tell me.’ He left sloppy kisses over her face as he dictated. ‘So? What. Do. You. Want?’ He punctuated each word with a touch
‘Fuck me.’
‘Of course.’ He had expected her to play around with the words, make him pull it out of him, but no. So, he got up and reached for the wallet in his jeans. He should have checked sooner. This had been too much of a risk, but luckily, the silver foil stuck out immediately.
She had sat up again to watch him rip the packaging open.
‘You’re making me feel really unprofessional right now,’ he chuckled to himself whilst pulling the condom out. ‘I have a whole box in my bag with the rest of my stuff.’ He had planned to get it out of his car after meeting her at the bar, but then everything had gone a bit to shit, hadn’t it?
‘I have a box… in my bag,’ she said, for some reason almost embarrassed.
‘Someone’s eager, huh?’ Perhaps he didn’t help, but really, he was talking about himself. Eddie could immediately imagine himself being with her for the rest of the night, the entire fucking week if he could, but something told him that after this— that would most likely be it. It was better not to stretch a good thing out. She paid for him to teach her the basics, not exhaust her to her limits, perhaps scare her off of sex forever.
‘No, I just–’ did she notice he was joking? Either way, she hid her face in her hands, laughing at herself. Eddie took the moment that she wasn’t eating him alive with her eyes to get a few pumps in. it wasn’t even needed; he was rock hard; it was just a routine at this point. He let his head roll back a little back as his hand moved up and down, then got on with putting the condom on.
♤
‘How should we uhm— how do you want—’ you looked for a good way to phrase it as Eddie got back into bed.
‘Anything particular in mind you wanted to get a hang of?’ he asked. You shook your head no. Stupid. You should have done your research. Come more prepared.
But could anything prepare you for Eddie? It didn’t seem likely. You could have come in with a four-volume guide, and he would have probably thrown it out the window and shown you a whole new world.
‘Then we’ll just see where the night takes us, why don’t we?’ He positioned himself on top of you. Arms on each side of your shoulders, stomach hovering over yours. As you both breathed in, you could feel his muscles. He put his weight on one of his forearms as the other hand reached back down between you, moving his fingers in a circular, steady motion.
Too occupied with how good his touch on you felt, there was no real thought going through your mind when you pulled his face closer to you, kissing him deeply. Your noses pushed against one another. Your fingers rooted down between his hair.
Eddie spread your legs wider apart, creating the perfect position for himself.
‘You ok?’ he asked, lips practically still on yours.
‘Mhm.’ You hummed, but Eddie clicked his tongue, pulling away a few inches to look at you a bit more focused.
‘Mm, remember rule four?’
You didn’t want to remember. You didn’t want to think. All you wanted, needed, was him inside you. But you answered: ‘use your words? Let them know what you want.’
‘Good girl,’ he kissed you softly. ‘It also goes for consent. Probably should have made that the first lesson, but what can you do? Make clear what and when you want something. If the guy doesn’t listen– I don’t know, kick him in the nuts.’
‘Got it.’ You nodded.
‘So, let’s try it out.’ He didn’t move, just waited for you to speak.
You took a deep breath. ‘I want you to fuck me, Eddie.’
‘There we go. Feels good, doesn’t it?’ His hand returned to rubbing your clit as he moved around above you, getting in the proper position. ‘Quick lesson five: it’s fucking hot when girls say shit like that. So don’t be afraid to get dirty.’ Slowly and carefully, he let himself sink into you. His length filled you up, spread your walls. It was a perfectly tight fit, making it impossible to hold anything in.
‘Dirty and loud.’ Eddie stayed still, letting you get used to the feeling of him. ‘Don’t hold it in, baby, ok?’
‘O-ok.’ Your breath was shaky. Once used to him, you placed your hand on his chest. His hot breath burned your skin.
Eddie kept a slow pace, letting both of you ease into the rhythm of being together, but eventually, you felt your body loosen up. Finally, it wasn’t enough anymore. Was he holding himself in? Could he tell you needed more but was waiting for you to tell him? Teach you your lesson.
‘More,’ the word was nearly just an exhale, but it was enough for Eddie. He kissed you passionately with a smile, and he plunged deeper inside you. From then on, his thrusts were harder, faster. He grabbed your leg and pulled it over himself. The new change brought in a whole new angle, letting you feel him through your entire body.
The pleasure was intense, and beautiful. Your mind was scattered, so you didn’t even feel your teeth graze over your lips, locking in your voice. But Eddie noticed.
♤
The second he caught it, something in Eddie’s mind switched on. As much as he tried to contain that part of himself, keep it away from her, he couldn’t. It was fucking primal.
He thrust harder than he did before. His hand found its way to her cheek, squeezing it– not too tight, he pulled himself back quickly, but strong enough to show her he meant it– and his words came out in a growl.
‘What did I tell you, baby? Don’t hold it in.’ A few more deep thrusts left both their bodies shaking with each move. ‘I want to hear every pretty sound that comes out of your mouth.’ His thumb pressed against her bottom lip, and, without another word exchanged, she parted those beautiful lips and granted him access.
She fucking moaned around it and sucked her own juices off it. Could she taste the sweetness? He hoped she could. He was jealous of every person that ever got to taste it, but he quickly let that thought sink away as he had more pressing questions.
‘Now, where did you learn that?’ He smiled when he pulled his thumb away, his hips only slightly rearranging the pace as he spoke calmly.
‘Sorry, was that wrong?’ She blinked. Genuine fucking naivete. Eddie could barely hold it in anymore.
‘Only in the sense that it got me this close to blowing my load before you got even close.’ He quickly regained his speed.
From that point on, she didn’t hold back. Her moans were beautiful. The sound of his name comes directly from the centre of her pleasure was like hitting the jackpot. If only he could live off those cute noises, he’d be the wealthiest man on earth. The luckiest. The happiest.
What the fuck was wrong with him?
But shit were her tits a sight for sore eyes. Looking at them, he couldn’t go a second without touching them. For a moment, he got scared he was too rough, but then the claws came out– almost literally. Her nails dug into his back. It would leave marks, and Eddie couldn’t wait to see them when he looked in the mirror the following day.
‘Eddieee,’ it came out so shaky, so desperate. He could tell she was getting close. It took much less than expected. He had a thousand things in his head that he still wanted to do with her, show her, but even he realised then it was wishful thinking. His own words from minutes ago reverberated in his mind.
You’re making me feel really unprofessional right now.
He was ready to burst, and it only took a few minutes in missionary. Usually, he could go for ages.
Then again, he hadn’t been this turned on in a long time.
‘You close, baby?’ He asked and almost hoped to hear yes; Eddie didn’t know how much longer he could last, and if he came before her– he could never live that down.
But she was lost in him, too far down to appropriately respond. That wasn’t good. Eddie slowed down a bit. ‘Hey, hey, you alright?’
♤
‘Yes,’ you took a deep breath, ‘please don’t stop. Not now.’ He was making you feel incredible. In a matter of a few minutes, you felt like you had reached the seventh heaven. Absolute bliss.
But perhaps you didn’t feel how much you actually felt. As good as it was, this overwhelming sensation pulled you away from everything around you. When Eddie brought you back, with the softness of his voice and the touch of his hands, only then you realised how far down you had been.
‘Are you sure? We can take a break.’ Eddie’s eyes searched your face for any signs of trouble, but before he could spiral, you halted him. A few deep breaths were all it took for you to be present.
‘I’m ok. Thank you.’ You kissed him. Whatever anyone would say if they heard about your plan, this was how you knew you had made the right choice. Or perhaps how you knew that the universe wasn’t always against you. Tonight, it brought you Eddie. Whether it was a freak accident or not, you would never regret the choices that led to it.
Eddie continued what he was doing, giving you all his attention. To all of you. You didn’t feel like an inch of your body went down forgotten. Meanwhile, he was all you could think about. It was like the world around you dissolved. A fire could have burned down the entire room, and you don’t think you would have even noticed. Not with Eddie’s cock deep inside you. He didn’t falter. Each thrust was full of him, hitting the perfect spot. Mind-numbing, toe-curling and…
Soon, you felt that feeling again. That tightness inside you. This time even tighter than previously. It was to be expected that Eddie knew what he was talking about. The longer the wait, the better the reward. And to think only a little time had passed since the two of you entered the hotel room. Not much time at all compared to how much you wished you could be with him. Was it insane? Probably, but you didn’t care.
You just wanted him, and you would take as much as he could give you.
♤
Eddie could feel how close she was.
It had definitely scared him when he saw how far down she had been, already blaming himself for taking it too far. He had been ready to pull the plug and return her all the money. It didn’t matter if her payment had actually gone to his account; he would make sure that his fuck ups were compensated.
But she was fine. Like a little firecracker that she was, she kissed him, wiping his whole mind clear of anything but her. Her and that sweet, sweet taste.
It didn’t take much longer for breathing to break up in quick succession. Moans got louder, likely uncontrolled, and her grip on his tighter. Her nails dug into his shoulder just as he loved it.
‘C’mon baby, come on.’ He encouraged her to lose all of her control. Lose herself to the pleasure. She needed to know how it was to be treated right. He needed her to know. And he didn’t know how much more he could keep it going. His last few thrusts still reached the deepest parts of her, and got everything out of her he wanted, but he felt himself lose his momentum. With each second, it was getting harder to concentrate.
‘Oh my god-’ she whimpered as she released underneath him with a high-pitched scream at that. As much as he wanted to hear all of it, he kissed her to mute it. There was no need for the neighbours to get concerned.
Though from all the other noises they made, from how the bed shook and banged against the wall, they would make the correct assumption.
Not much later, as she was still coming undone, Eddie let himself reel in the pleasure. Then, stilled within her, his lips on her neck now, he came. When he pulled away, he wished he could have left a mark on her, but he knew that would be a step too far.
‘Thank you’ were the first words to come out of her mouth when he discarded the full condom in the trash. He wasn’t sure what to do now. He didn’t like feeling naked post-sex, but he didn’t want her to get the wrong idea. Maybe she expected more. If so, he could give it to her, but he just wasn’t sure–
‘It’s my pleasure,’ he sat on the edge of the bed, just in reach to place his hand on her leg. They were both covered in sweat, naturally, but the cold was taking over. ‘You should get under the covers.’ The last thing he wanted was for her to get sick.
‘Right.’ She pulled at the corner of the blanket– always a much more arduous task than necessary in hotel rooms when they’re tucked in deeper than the pits of hell. As soon as she pulled the white sheet over her body, Eddie regretted his choice of words. It was probably the last time he would have seen her naked, and he didn’t even take a moment to appreciate what he had in front of him.
He found his underwear, which was almost kicked under the bed. When he resurfaced, her face was full of worry. The furrow of her brows was enough to tell him that.
‘What’s wrong?’ he asked as he covered himself up.
‘I’m sorry.’
‘I don’t understand.’
‘I didn’t do anything. I asked you to help me figure this out, and we just–’
‘No, hey, hey.’ Eddie practically jumped into bed next to her. Cupped her face in his hands and made sure she looked at him as he spoke. ‘First of all, if this is how you feel, I should be the one to be sorry since I clearly didn’t do my job. So I’m sorry. But you have no reason to think you didn’t do well. This was amazing.’ He could only hope she knew just how much he meant his words. That she could trust a complete stranger with words as much as she did with their bodies.
‘No, Eddie, it’s not that you didn’t teach me anything, but I– there’s still so much I don’t know. Fuck, I still have no idea how to suck a guy off.’
Eddie cursed under his breath. Just from those words, he could feel himself twitching against his boxers. This girl was going to be the death of me. She kept on talking.
‘Would it be ok if we do this again? Not as an accident this time, I will book you.’
He wanted to say yes so badly. But he had to keep his mind clear as he answered. ‘I don’t think that will be a good idea.’ fuck. Fuck. Fuck. He wanted to punch himself in the gut.
♤
‘I try to keep a strict one-time, no repeating clients policy. It makes the job much easier,’ Eddie explained.
‘No, I understand.’ Having to do this with the number of people he does… you couldn’t imagine how that was. How other people would be with him, and what could have happened for him to make such a rule in the first place.
‘I would say you should try Steve for real, but I don’t believe you need any “sex lessons”.
‘Right,’ you scoffed away the comment, but Eddie was persistent.
‘I mean it. I can tell that you have a whole talent in there for this shit. You just need to find the right guy to bring it out in you because whoever you’ve been in the past, clearly, they weren’t doing it right. Then you will learn everything else you want to learn by yourself. Basically like you did now.’ He gave you a kind smile, and you tried to replicate it.
‘I did need you.’ You couldn’t look at him as you said it.
‘Ehhh– not so sure about that. For a while, I thought you just wanted me for my body.’ He fell over to his back, hand on his chest as if he had just been shot. ‘That shit can hurt, you know.’ He was so dramatic and made you laugh so easily. You had never expected anything like that to happen that night.
♤
A body to adore was one thing, but he might miss her smile even more.
‘Are you feeling alright?’
‘Why do you keep asking me that?’ She blinked. Eddie pushed down the anger he felt at all those morons that had not treated her right before.
‘Let that be your final lesson then,’ he pushed down another instinct, this time to make a cheesy reference that she might not get. There was no need to make the mood weird or awkward now. Eddie cleared his throat. ‘Lesson… what number are we on, six?– Lesson six: aftercare. Just check up on yourself to see if you’re able to carry on afterwards. While always quite vital, the more intense the session, the more important the aftercare. It keeps you stable.’
She nodded in understanding. ‘So, how would that look?’
‘Well, let’s see…. Are you sore? Do you need anything?’ Once again, he was mad at himself for going into this without his usual stuff. While his bag was mostly filled with toys that might be a bit too much for her, he also had plenty of shit to make her feel better if needed.
‘No, I don’t think so.’
‘Ok, do you need something to drink? Eat?’ Before she even replied, Eddie lunged for the can of soda she had discarded on the desk opposite the bed. The bubbles would have mostly flattened by now, but it was still a liquid to drink.
‘Not really,’ she said as he handed her the can and took a small sip. ‘Ok, maybe a little bit.’ They both smiled as she emptied the can of its last chug.
‘More?’ Eddie asked as he tried to read it off of her.
‘No, I’m good.’ Just like before, she started tapping on the can. Now empty, it sounded even more hollow.
‘And was everything alright? I was scared I might have gone too far at one point.’
♤
The way you could see the genuine concern and worry in Eddie’s eyes made you want to wrap your arms around him, kiss him, and never let him go. To think that a few hours ago, neither of you was even aware of the other’s existence. That you weren’t supposed to be aware, that it was all a giant coincidence. And that after tonight… that would be all that it ever was.
Here was this fantastic man taking care of you better than any other guy had.
Sure, you paid him to do it, but something in you, call it a freaky instinct, told you that that was just who Eddie was. He wanted to take care of you.
Maybe that’s why he went into the business. Who could really tell?
‘It was perfect,’ you told him because it was.
‘Ok, good.’ He nodded, smiling shyly. It was the first time that night that you saw a crack in the confident front of the guy.
‘Really, thank you.’ You reached for his hand, and his eyes followed it. He looked as your fingers lazily intertwined while you watched him.
‘You, uhm, you should probably go to the bathroom. Make sure you wash all of me out. Make it a standard practice, really.’
‘Will do,’ your voice wasn’t hoarse, yet you whispered. It suddenly became hushed in the room. It could have been quiet all this time, but it was then that you grew aware of it.
You didn’t want to leave the bed, or Eddie, just yet, but you knew you should listen to his professional advice. Everything he had told you so far felt like the most obvious thing in the world. Maybe you also knew of them already, maybe did it too, but it only made sense when it came from Eddie. ‘Don’t leave yet, ok? I want to say goodbye.’ The idea of him being gone when you came back felt gut-wrenching for many reasons, but all unknown.
All Eddie did was nod.
When you returned, he had just put his shirt back on. His belt was in his jeans loops but not yet fastened. Was it weird to watch him get dressed? It felt more like a thing real couples did, which you were far from. It felt stranger doing so whilst you were still completely naked, so you grabbed the fluffy white bathrobe on the bathroom shelf and pulled it on, tying it tightly around your waist.
‘That’s me then.’ Eddie scratched the back of his neck, looking around, most likely checking if he didn’t forget something. A part of you hoped he did. He would realise it only hours later and rush back to find it. That this wasn’t the last time the two of you would meet.
A girl could wish.
‘Right.’ You put on a brave face as you made your way to the door. ‘Thank you again. For everything.’
All Eddie did in response was nod with a tight-lipped smile.
The door was open now. He was already on the threshold. Compared to the soft glow of your room, the corridor's light felt jarring to your eyes. Just like that, it was over.
You could not believe this was the end. It ended as quickly as it started. A whole whirlwind of… everything, really.
Before you could stop yourself, one last question burst through your lips.
‘Is Eddie your real name?’ You immediately regretted your entire life, couldn’t believe you had done that. ‘I’m so sorry, just ignore me. I don’t know why I said that–’
But Eddie beamed. He took your hand in his. ‘As real as anything tonight was.’ and placed a soft kiss on your knuckles. He started walking before your wrist even hit your hip.
You couldn’t watch him walk away, so you closed the door and your eyes before he went too far. A minute later, you cursed to yourself.
The whole aftercare thing- You never got to ask if he was ok.
Fuck.
the end.
thank you so much for reading!! if you want more of where this came from, check out my masterlist. - also made a lil playlist based on this fic, told through taylor swift songs
and please support your (not so) local creators by liking AND reblogging.
I would love to know what you thought of the story, so please consider leaving a comment, or maybe an ask or even an anonymous review ;P
you are also more than welcome to join the taglist. right here.
Eddie (smut, 18+) taglist part 1:
@spiderrrling @theglitterymess @dorianelizabeth @theletterhart @niyahwhoreworld @fopdoodle1624 @pastel-abyss-x @ghoulsgraveyard @lovesickollie @xbreezymeadowsx @ssanjuniperoo @nxrdamp @meaganjm @mischiefmanagers @capybergara @brother-lauren @h0sh1verse @ghostlyreads @croweaterr @ladyapplejackdnd @bilesxbilinskixlahey @kbakery @lizzylynch1 @liltimmyst @hellfire-state-of-mind @escape-in-time-x @sweetpeapod @the-a-word-2214 @eddiemunsonbby @mydearzero @overthewhiteclouds @wroteclassicaly @groupies-do-it-better @celestialsxturn @hoe4eddiemunson @inanausomewhere @scoops-harrington @fluffyharrington @billyhargrovesprincess @annikin-im-panicin @kaitieskidmore1 @yesv01 @princess-aries
#eddie munson#eddie munson au#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x you#eddie munson x y/n#eddie munson smut#eddie munson fanfiction#eddie munson fic#eddie munson imagine#fanfiction#imagine#fanfic#fic#smut#escort!eddie munson#escort!eddie
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part 1 (both girls in their full outfits) ; part 2 (Edwina in several other outfits/sketches) ; part 3 (the companion to this piece aka Edwina getting ready :)
part 4 of my fem!payneland fanart series!!!! as I talked about with the poll, I have quite a few variations of this piece as I couldn’t make up my mind on a few of the elements, but I listened to your feedback and have included them all here !! the winner of the poll is above the cut with the rest of the variations below to hopefully make this not take up too much of your dash lol
lmk what you think - especially people who voted on the poll!! I’ve also included my thought process below the cut since I know y’all are interested :)
- first and foremost: I have absolutely no idea what order someone would get ready in with all these outfit components, so if you’re sitting here like “why is her makeup done when she has to pull a shirt over her head?” or something like that: you’re probably correct but my getting ready process is always chaos and there aren’t exactly articles on this sort of thing
- along with that: her straightening her hair is probably not accurate to how hair works but again I’ve got v little experience to pull from and trying to find a proper reference was a pain in the ass
yes her bra is fully rendered and then got covered up by her arm. I'm still mad that I did that to myself but I like the pose too much to change it so oh well
- (onto actual historical stuff!!)
- her hair is being straightened here despite straight not being in style during this era for several reasons:
1. I based her hair (and a lot of her style, as per part 1) on Rhoda Dakar of the band The Bodysnatchers, which was an all-female band that was part of the ska revival in the late 70s/early 80s. Rhoda Dakar in particular is a British artist (who’s still making music!) with an English mother and Jamaican father—so not only was she one of the only women of color I could find as part of this subgenre/in ths era/with plenty of photo references, but considering Jayden Revri is Jamaican and English (alongside Indian) himself I thought it was fitting! Her Bodysnatchers look is also much more femme leaning than the rest of the band, as well as her hair styled in a way that suggests straightening, so I carried that over to Charlotte here as well.
2. On a related note, there is a clear historical and modern difference in hairstyles worn/made popular/deemed fashionable by non-white versus white individuals and I thought it only appropriate to acknowledge that in my design of her. I even went so far as to research how her mom’s hair may have been styled since I assume that’s who would’ve been teaching her how to care for her hair in the first place. With that, I looked at popular Indian hair trends from the 60s (figuring that’s when Charlotte’s mom could’ve still been in India and following those trends) which also involved a preference for straight/wavy hair, with soft fringe made popular by Sadhana and the styles ranging from long and luscious to styled up into a very 60s beehive. Charlotte could easily also rock a beehive, especially since the 60s revival was a part of the ska revival movement and Dakar herself styled her hair as such, but I figured Charlotte is a little too much of a rebellious teenager to go for a look she’s seen her mom wear!
- her makeup is based off of the different members of The Bodysnatchers as well as other punk/ska fans at the time. The look usually required more blush that what I gave her here, but I wanted to make sure the eyes were the feature (since Charles wears eyeliner himself) and then the lips being any less just looked weird to me. Also, Dakar doesn't seem to wear the same heavy blush that the other members do, which could be a stylistic choice but could also be the potential lack of blush shades that would work well on her skin tone, so I went that route for Charlotte here
- her underwear is all based off of meticulous searching of historical advertisements, though I will admit the sources are (presumably) American since I couldn't find British equivalents (I'm hoping the styles were similar enough...) in particular:
1. Her bra is based off of: Playtex’s New Made for Me, Playtex’s Right For Me, and Playtex’s Thank Goodness It Fits (which are seriously the names of these as per the ads—how creative /s)
2. Her panties (or pants or underwear or whatever term you want to use) are based off of: Sears Best’s Nylon tricot panties, Sears Very Impressive Panties Nylon panties, and JCPenny’s eiderlon fashion panties
3. (In the below variations) Her pantyhose are theoretically based on L’eggs and Spirit by Stevens’s Slim & Slender pantyhose. But, honestly, they’re mostly based on my own experience wearing hose bc almost none of the ads showed how the gusset of the pantyhose actually looked so I needed to fill in the gaps (one of the many reasons I’m still unhappy with them—plus the wrinkles would not look right no matter what I did !!)
4. Her socks are called slouch socks! I don’t have a specific brand for them but the style was all the rage in the 80s-90s (and I want to own some so bad ngl)
- the hair straightener is just a blob based on the reference photo since trying to research historical hair tools was beyond me at the time apparently, but the style of outlet/plug is accurate to Britain in 1989 so there’s that at least (I have no idea why my brain works like this)
- since I talked about it in the poll I feel like I should address it here: technically having a bush was well out of fashion by 1989 due to the grooming boom and new types of hair removal popular throughout the 80s and 90s. However, she’s wearing multiple layers over it and is technically a teenager (in an abusive household and a catholic all-girls school, at that) so I kept going back and forth on it. It won the poll so it’s in the main post, but you’ll see in the below variations that I really went back and forth on it. that being said I do think it’s interesting given her nylon pants being semi-sheer besides at the gusset, so I’m not mad at it. plus I figured she was definitely shaving her legs/underarms, so maybe that balances it out ?
and finally here’s the other seven variations of this piece :) lmk what you think!!
#my art#femme!charles rowland#femme!charlotte rowland#fem!charles rowland#fem!payneland#charles rowland#charlotte rowland#payneland#painland#dead boy detectives#dbda#fanart#charles x edwin#edwin x charles#dbda fanart#the dead boy detectives#dead boy detectives fanart#dead girl detectives#charles rowland fanart#payneland AU#dead boy detective AU#1980s fashion#ska punk fashion#lesbian#femme lesbian#chadwin#genderbend#save dead boy detectives#renew dead boy detectives#dead boy detective netflix
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I consider you a JW expert so I wanted to ask your opinion on something; I follow this blog called does-it-like-women where they make polls asking whether a certain piece of media likes women (it's pretty hilarious). Anyway, Jurassic World failed massively and gained the verdict of 'Hates Women' - do you feel like this is accurate? I'm inclined to agree but eh, it's complicated
I think it’s important to understand the context of why jw 2015 got so much backlash. it actually started before the movie even came out… by a man who sexually harassed women (joss whedon). it began when the scene where claire was approaching owen for the indominus was dropped as a teaser where he basically calls claire a stiff bitch. people, particularly marvel fans, went into it assuming she’d be a bitch archetype. this was not an organic backlash.
as for the movie itself, there’s the heels controversy. I must stress that BDH WANTED the heels. they were going to let claire go barefoot instead but she was like “why would she go barefoot??? there’s glass and sticks everywhere?? I think it would be more in character if she just kept them”. the heels were an artistic choice, chosen by the actress, to emphasize that the character could, and I quote, “do anything a man (owen) could do backwards and in heels”. and the reason she STARTS the movie in heels is bc the character designer specifically wanted her to “seem like she wouldn’t survive past the first act”. the viewer is meant to see her as incompetent, like the men of the movie, and completely unequipped for the jungle. and then she breaks every expectation by being, as the director calls her, the real hero.
as for her character arc, it’s more about class than femininity. there’s a misconception that she’s giving up her corporate job bc the narrative wants her to be a house wife. this is blatantly wrong. the narrative wants her to be kind. capitalism is not kind. that’s why from even the early jw dvd interviews they’re starting to talk about her as an eco-terrorist (yes, they use that word) in the making. it’s also somewhat explicitly the reason she leaves owen in fk. he wants to play domestic life and she wants to run an activist empire to save the dinosaurs. im paraphrasing multiple interviews in that but yeah.
the most iffy part to me is her ending up with a child. I’m willing to let it pass bc she does it in a very non-traditional non-heteronormative way (adopting/fostering an older child with lots of baggage) but i don’t mind people having issues with it. I would however be absolutely livid if they canonized bio children for her. fanon is whatever but that woman should never be pregnant in canon.
as for zara, i cannot stress enough that it was the actresses choice. in the script, that death is of a man (two, actually). that was not going to happen unless katie mcgrath really wanted to do it (which she did).
I would also like to emphasize that claire is the first antagonist figure to not die. she fills the role of the corporate lawyer in JP or ludlow in TLW. yet, the narrative redeems her corporate greed instead of punishing her for it. if she were in any of the original movies, she would’ve been one of the big deaths. and this was WHY she was chosen to be the main character (I also cannot stress enough that she is. not owen. the director says that like every other interview cause everybody downplays her importance). they wanted “a character who had a lot of room to grow”.
I think the narrative is incredibly kind to claire as a character and that her being a woman is part of that. another part of her jw arc is what the director describes as “being underestimated by every man who she comes across”. she is meant to be dismissed as very one note (because she’s a feminine woman) and then you see she is very nuanced (which is why her last name is dearing. it’s meant to be a tongue and check way to call her ENdearing) and capable. owen and the boys during the rex scene are meant to be her “damsels in distress” as a subversion of the trope.
I mostly covered JW here bc I’m not sure what specifically that poll was based on but JW is my personal meta-favorite of the franchise bc of how much it absolutely adores claire. I’d give links to all this stuff but I am at work and wasting company time on this <3
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Hm, because my last ask wasn’t really a headcanon but more of a theory I decided to do another one (:<
Taco loves to participate in the arts, like, any type of art. Music? She hums random tunes or songs she knows and makes up songs on the spot sometimes. Writing? She wrote Pickle countless letters ofcourse she participates in writing (and any type of writing too). Drawing? She’s not good at it but she’ll use it as an outlet to get her feelings across if she can’t find the words (and she finds it a pretty relaxing hobby all things considered). Literally any type of art you can name she probably does it for fun, cause she’s bored, or to get out her feelings.
Bonus!: Taco is 100% selectivity mute with Autism and you can not change my mind. She rants about a topic she hatefully passionate about one moment and the next she’s dead silent with nothing to say. Sometimes she’ll go hours or maybe even days without speaking due to her time in the woods and her S1 persona effecting her.
Hiya, Mushy!!!!^^ Welcome back, and thank you for sending in a headcanon!!!! :D AND A BONUS THAT I SO SO AGREE WITH AND WANT TO TALK ABOUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I love the idea of Taco being an artistic little bean!!!!! Your examples are beautiful and beloved and so so so so so so so so so right!!!!!!!! She has such a beautiful voice and we have seen her making up songs on the spot!!!!! She's a real poet hehehe (My Tacoon frienship propaganda will not be stopped). I like to think she writes in a very flowery way, which is part of the reason why Pickle just burnt her letters since they seem quite insincere, but that's actually just how she writes. Heck, that's how she speaks half the time. My angel who is not normal!!! <3<3<3<3 And I think her drawing would be nice!! She might get frustrated if she can't draw something as well or as accurately as she wants, so I think coloring books might be best for her!!!! A nice calming activity!!!!!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA SELECTIVELY MUTE TACO YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS I HAVE BEEN WAITING TO TALK ABOUT THIS!!!!! I was planning to do it in the Taco Autism post I keep saying I'm going to make but I'm nervous that if I get stuff wrong people will get mad at me. Maybe I'll make a poll to see if people actually want it. ANYWAYS!!! YES. SHE IS SO SELECTIVELY MUTE YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW!! Augh. The way she is silent throughout Mic scolding her!! She could retort, or try to explain to Mic what she actually intended, but she is silent until right before Mic cuts their communication. Ough and you are so right she was in the woods!!! for so long, especially before meeting Mic, her only person to talk to for years was HERSELF!!!! She has been mostly quiet a very long time!!! AND she's around not only A) people who she is used to remaining mostly quiet around but B) new people who mostly if not entirely know about her history!!!!! She thinks she's on thinner ice than she is, I believe, which would make her even more nervous and keep her from doing much talking. Thank you Mushy for bringing up selectively mute Taco!!!!!^^^^^^ :D
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Your journey
[ Newjeans x F! volleyball player won the poll]
Words: 695
Pairing: Newjeans x F! volleyball player
part 2 [part1] [part3]
As the days pass at Hybe University, our routine becomes more familiar. Classes in the morning, volleyball practice in the evening, and hanging out with our new friends in between. NewJeans quickly becomes a central part of our social circle, and I enjoy spending time with them. Their energy and kindness are infectious.
Despite this, I notice that Haerin, one of the quieter members of NewJeans, often stays silent during group conversations. While the others engage enthusiastically, Haerin mostly listens, occasionally offering a shy smile or a few words when directly addressed.
During a break between classes
Hana, NewJeans, and I find a spot under a large tree on campus. The group chats animatedly about everything from upcoming concerts to the latest trends. Haerin sits a bit apart from the group, her nose buried in a book.
"Hey, Haerin," I say, scooting closer to her. "What are you reading?"
She looks up, slightly startled, but then smiles softly. "Oh, it's just a novel I picked up. It's really interesting."
"Cool," I reply, genuinely curious. "What's it about?"
As Haerin begins to describe the plot, I listen intently. Her eyes light up as she talks about the characters and their adventures, and I realize she’s passionate about reading.
"That sounds amazing," I say when she finishes. "You should tell us more about it sometime."
Haerin nods, a small but genuine smile on her face. "Sure, I'd like that."
Later, at the cafeteria during lunch
Hana is busy discussing volleyball strategies with Hanni and Minji, while I notice Haerin sitting quietly, pushing her food around her plate. I decide to engage her again.
"Haerin, do you like volleyball?" I ask, trying to find common ground.
She looks up, surprised by the question. "I do, actually. I used to play a bit in middle school, but I wasn't very good."
"I bet you'd be better than you think," I encourage her. "Maybe you could join us for a practice sometime. It could be fun."
Haerin blushes slightly, shaking her head. "I don't know… I'm not sure if I can keep up with you guys. You're all so good."
"We're all here to have fun and get better together," I reassure her. "No pressure."
Haerin's smile widens a bit. "Maybe I'll come watch first."
That evening, at the volleyball court
Practice is intense but rewarding. Coach Tanaka pushes us all to our limits, and the team's chemistry continues to improve. As we take a break, I notice Haerin sitting in the bleachers, watching intently.
"Hey, Haerin!" Hana calls out, waving her over. "Come down here!"
Haerin hesitates but eventually makes her way to the court. Hana hands her a volleyball. "Wanna try a few passes with us?"
"Um, okay," Haerin says, nervously taking the ball.
Hana and I take turns gently passing the ball to Haerin, encouraging her with each successful pass. Slowly, she starts to gain confidence, her passes becoming more accurate.
"See? You're doing great!" I tell her, high-fiving her after a particularly good pass.
The rest of the practice goes by quickly, with Haerin staying to watch and occasionally join in. By the end, she looks more relaxed and even a bit excited.
After practice, as we're all packing up
"Thanks for letting me join in," Haerin says quietly. "It was fun."
"Anytime," I reply, smiling warmly. "We should do this more often."
"Yeah, you should come to our practices more," Hana adds. "And hang out with us more, too."
Haerin nods, her smile now reaching her eyes. "I'd like that."
In the following weeks
Haerin begins to join our group more frequently, not just for volleyball practice but also for study sessions, lunch breaks, and casual hangouts. She opens up little by little, sharing more about her interests and thoughts. The once-quiet member of NewJeans starts to become more comfortable and engaged, her laughter and insights adding a new dimension to the group's dynamic.
Hana and I are thrilled to see her blossoming, and NewJeans appreciates how we've helped Haerin feel more included. With everyone supporting each other, our bond with NewJeans grows stronger, making our time at Hybe University even more enjoyable and memorable.
#newjeans x reader#newjeans imagines#newjeans#newjeans danielle#newjeans haerin#newjeans minji#newjeans hanni#newjeans hyein#kpop x you#kpop x y/n#kpop x reader#kpop gg
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Aftermath
My bid for innocence in Milgramblr.
Or, more accurately, my bid that @good-beans started "Order of Attack". Sure, I sent the ask, but Beans created the concept of Eyepatch Amane.
I maintain that if I truly started it, Amane would have only been a bit scuffed. And here is my original vision as proof. (Uh, it might be tainted by 10 months of writing whump...)
Not proofread, but @stuffedsand and @purgemarchlockdown helped me brainstorm some of the dialogue.
(1089 words)
Wait, it's over a thousand words? It was only 500 words when I went to put the finishing touches!
Oops.
(This is queued for the 4am slot, but I will reblog with a poll once I'm awake.)
(Cw: canon-typical violence, cult mentality, reference to child abuse; Amane is a bad patient; medical information may be inaccurate)
-
A collision with the wall. A few whacks to the head. That was all Amane would get for now. That was all fine because she could barely move after that anyway.
The pain was all-consuming, unlike anything Amane had ever experienced before. She had never been this close to losing consciousness. Was she even conscious still?
The glare from Kotoko's eyes still burned in her. Unfathomable malice directed at a subject with no hope of redemption, but also a weak subject who could be tossed aside for later.
All she could do was wait for her proper turn like a good girl.
Kotoko had more pressing matters to deal with, after all. That being Fuuta, who was screaming and kicking for her to stop. No wonder he was first; Kotoko must have thought he needed to learn the lesson faster. But Amane could hardly register what was happening to him, except that it was ten times as brutal as any punishment she had ever faced, and that a similar fate might await her.
But Kotoko did not finish because the door slammed open, and Amane returned to her shell of absolute, utter, intense agony.
Next thing she knew, Kazui was kneeling by her side, guiding her to lie down, asking her things that didn't make sense. Fuuta was lying limply on the floor, covered in blood. Kotoko was gone.
What had Kotoko said? Something about delivering punishments in order?
"Mahiru san…" Amane muttered. "All alone…"
"I know, but I can't leave you two here without anyone else to watch."
-
Truly, this pain was nothing. Amane's head was still spinning a day later, and a high-pitched sound rang in her ears. She tried to blink away the morning blurriness, but it refused to give way to clarity. A deep breath triggered the pain of a thousand bruises.
And yet she had gotten off lightly. The others could have died, or so she heard; nobody would give her more details than that.
She had to go see for herself. But the moment she got herself to her feet, she sensed the figure of a certain Kirisaki Shidou looming over her.
"Amane, what do you think you are doing? Go back to sleep." Ugh, how patronizing.
"I need to talk to my friends." She tried to her voice cold and calculated so Shidou wouldn't dare dismiss her, but she couldn't control the shaking.
"They are in no condition to talk. Let them rest. Do not bother them."
"Bother them? Surely they would like to see a friendly face after everything that transpired."
"You need to rest too. You shouldn't be walking around while concussed."
"I can walk around just fine."
"You'll only make your condition worse and slow down your recovery."
Amane glared at Shidou with as much willpower as she could muster. "Are you really going to drag me into your immoral practice? Now?"
In turn, Shidou sighed. "This isn't up for debate. Go back to sleep."
"Let me talk to them." It took all she had not to scream at him.
"You can do that after you rest." The desire to raise their voices seemed mutual.
As Amane opened her mouth to retort, dark spots began to swim in her vision. She wished she had the strength to tell Shidou to back off, but instead, he guided her back down to rest.
-
"Let me talk to them," Amane insisted.
"I am not going to let you risk your health over a conversation."
"I have proven that I can sit up for five minutes without falling over."
"I never asked you to do that. Go back and lie down."
"You said they could have died."
That caught Shidou's attention. "Your point is?"
"You are wasting a lot of your effort on me when they clearly need it more."
"Amane, you aren't making sense."
"I need to talk to them. What if they die, and I miss my chance to get closure because I'm resting?"
Not the most logical argument, but it seemed to strike a nerve in Shidou. "Fine. Five minutes with each of them. That's it."
-
Mahiru resembled a mummy, or half of one, with all the seemingly fresh bandages wrapped around her. She was well on the way to an early demise. Amane had half a mind to warn her to reject the doctor's evil work, but it seemed those words would fall on deaf ears. She had to make this time count.
"Mahiru-san… I'm sorry."
"Hmm…" Mahiru stirred slightly, eyelids quivering open. "Ama…"
"It's okay… don't push it… I just needed to say… I wish I was there with you. So you would not have to face those trials alone."
"But…" Mahiru pursed her lips, seemingly to say Fuuta's name.
"Fuuta-san was found by Kazui-san. I only wish you weren't alone." Maybe only was the wrong word. Amane leaned forward. "I wish that you won't die soon. I would miss you so much."
It took Mahiru a moment to process, but then she smiled slightly. "Thanks… Amane-chan…"
-
Fuuta was lucky that Kazui had intervened. But still, he was missing an eye, and it sounded like he could hardly breathe.
Rumor had it that he could have died if nobody stepped in. They had found Mahiru in critical condition, but they could have found Fuuta dead.
And then what would have become of Amane? No doubt, if left alone with Kotoko, she would have had it the worst. And if she had gone to visit Mahiru instead…
Amane shook away the thought. She only had a few precious moments to speak to Fuuta. He must have noticed her shadow because his good eye was now open and looking wearily at her.
"Fuuta-san, I'm sorry."
"For wh…"
"I was too weak to stop Kotoko-san. I was there in the room, but I couldn't-"
"No…"
What? That caught Amane off guard. Fuuta continued while she tried to find the words again.
"I'm… sorry… couldn't stop her…"
"Oh, no, it wasn't your fault. I-"
"Wasn't… yours… either…"
This conversation was going in circles, and time was slipping away.
"I just hope we can have a real conversation again someday." One that wasn't tainted by pain and suffering.
-
Amane tried to ignore the pounding in her head and drift off to sleep. She knew her suffering paled in comparison to Mahiru and Fuuta, but she had never known anything like this before.
She had never been this sleepless before. And yet this trial too would come to pass.
#milgram#amane momose#fuuta kajiyama#kotoko yuzuriha#kazui mukuhara#shidou kirisaki#mahiru shiina#canon typical violence#cw cults#cw child abuse#bad things happen to amane#kyanako writes#milgramblrgram
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These polls have given me much to think about but what I'm chewing on right now is which characters get lumped into "canonically lesbian" or "canonically gay". Almost no characters in the show are actually given a stated sexuality. The word lesbian is not used a single time on supernatural. The word gay is used a few times, but usually not in reference to a gay person. We are told that Conner, the young man in Gimme Shelter who dies, is openly gay by the pastor. The ghostfacers call Corbett the "gay intern" but honestly based on everything we know about the ghostfacers that might not be exactly accurate. What we really know is that he has a crush on Ed. Marshall Hall, the man who dies in Dean's place in Faith is called "openly gay teacher" in the newspaper. So we have three instances of someone else labeling someone as gay to varying degrees of believability, all (presumably) cis white men who are murdered in the episode they appear. Charlie is perhaps the next clearest example. She is clearly not interested in men, says they are "not her type" which is TV speak for 100% gay, and is said and shown repeatedly to be into women exclusively. To me that's enough to be considered canonically lesbian even if it's not stated in that way. Max Banes is a similar but even less clear case. Once again, he is never stated to be gay, but he does solely show interest in men and talks about being interested in men in a similar way. Unlike Charlie, he never says he's not interested in women which gives it some deniability, but to me his scenes come off as TV speak for very gay as well. The gorgon Noah Ophis goes after both men and women, so he could technically be described as bi, although as much as I love his episode I dont know how much I'd count kissing people in order to paralyze them as evidence of his sexuality. The last confirmed example is Chuck. He is stated to have been in relationships with men and women (and seems to have enjoyed it) so I think it's safe to call him canonically bisexual, but once again that wording is never used.
For the rest of the canonically lgbt characters, we have no indication if they are gay or bi (or anything else). We just know they're in a same gender relationship or have feelings for someone of the same gender (broadly speaking). Yet many of these characters like Claire, Lily Baker, Jesse and Cesar, etc. get labeled as "canonically lesbian/gay" rather than queer or bi. I know I've done it too. But it's just not true. I do headcanon some of these characters one way or another. I think Claire is a lesbian, but we don't actually know that. She has mutual romantic feelings with one other woman on the show when she's in her early 20s (a time when a lot of people are working through their sexuality) that is described by Jody as her first love, and that's it. Yes we know she's not straight, but we don't actually know anything further than that for sure.
For the characters who are in multiple episodes like Castiel, Claire, etc or even the ones who get a more dedicated single episode story like Jesse, there are things you could use to support different interpretations, but let's be completely honest, having a character who we know next to nothing about (who often dies within the episode) say "I have a girlfriend/boyfriend" is not really evidence that they are gay rather than bi or vice versa.
I don't know what to make of this really. I think you could argue it's partially bi erasure, that the default seems to be lesbian/gay rather than queer, but I don't know how much people are really thinking about it. But maybe it is something we should be more conscious of. I'm not saying people can't have headcanons or interpretations. I will probably always read Claire as a lesbian, but maybe we should stop saying things like "this character is literally canonically a lesbian" when we don't actually know that. And also not using things like how gender nonconforming a character is to correlate to "how gay" they are. There are bi people who are extremely obviously queer to outsiders and lesbians and gay men who are not. You can be a masc woman with a boyfriend or a femme man with a wife. You can be genderfluid and exclusively attracted to one gender. These types of external signifiers don't really tell you about someone's internal experience and i think when we replicate these beliefs in fandoms it can affect people's perceptions, especially if that's outside of your experience.
#it can just be kinda jarring as a bi person whos exclusively been with women to see some of these takes where a character is ''obviously a#lesbian'' based on things that could very much apply to me
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Shantae Headcanons - Holly Lingerbean
So, it's now officially 2024! And as per my previous poll, with her winning the tiebreaker coin flip, I'm kicking off this year with a bang - Holly Lingerbean! Normally, one character would not a single headcanon post make, but she's one of my favorites, so. Yeah
Before I start, though, a few relevant readings you might want to pick up before this - none of it is necessary to understand this post, mind you, it's just that I have talked about Holly before, so if you want more Holly content, this is where you'll get it! First off is Living Memoir, AKA the start to what I SWEAR will eventually be a series of fics about a Holly Lingerbean redemption arc. The second thing is my Couples/Romance headcanon post from over a month back. While not exclusively about Holly, one of the sections does extensively feature her!
Backstory
So! Let's start with the basics. As I've mentioned in my Magical Species headcanon post, before Holly became a living memory, she was actually a half-pixie, not a half-genie. More specifically, her father was a pixie and a stage magician, adding illusion magic to classic sleight of hand for some truly fantastic shows, and her mother was a human who ran a local bakery, delighting the inhabitants of Tassel Town with her delicious delicacies. Born in a relatively peaceful town to a loving family, at first, Holly Lingerbean was...surprisingly close to Shantae, in terms of personality!
While she was never responsible for the safety of her town like Shantae was, Holly still had a rather kind-hearted nature and a need to help, so she was often up and about in town, helping various merchants carry out their stock early before the market was officially open, acting as a waitress in her mother's bakery, helping people find what they need in the library, that sort of thing. She also made the occasional appearance as an assistant in her father's magic shows, and between that, the aforementioned tendency to help everyone else out, and just her being incredibly nice, she had a lot of fans in Tassel Town! It was shocking, at first, but flattering...and eventually, Holly started letting it get to her head a little.
And as she reached adulthood, with the terrifying unknown of the future starting to loom over her like the grim reaper, scythe ready to tear away Holly's happy life in Tassel Town, some part of Holly just...wanted things to stay the same. Forever. Why couldn't she just keep being nice and helpful? Wasn't it enough to keep being who she was, who she had been for all her life? Why couldn't she just keep being loved and adored? That was when Holly remembered an old book that her father had locked away in the attic, and, well. She couldn't stop anything else from changing, but maybe she could keep herself from changing - keep herself young, beautiful, and forever adored. And so, young and foolish and unwittingly throwing away her future, she grabbed that book and used a spell from within.
I've said before that the other, much rarer magic pixies specialize in is preservation magic. That's a technically accurate description, because that's what it's used for and what it does, and it's the official title, but it doesn't quite convey the exact danger. The reason why it's so hard to use, even for genies, the reason why others began hunting down pixies just for knowing how to use it, is because preservation magic is time magic. The fact that Holly's attempt to use it on herself backfired so graciously is honestly a blessing, considering it could have gone much, much worse, but it did backfire, and turned Holly into the living memory she is now...though she didn't quite realize at first. No, she only realized it when the eternal sandstorm settled over Tassel Town, condemning it to a slow demise, and Holly began to fade with it.
Naturally, Holly panicked, and she ran away, desperate to cling to life, and as she ran through Sequin Land in a haze, that's when she first found Wilbur. That's when she discovered what he could do, and how it could benefit her. That's when she started to plan...and gradually, over the course of many human lifetimes, through a combination of self-preservation and her own ego becoming her number one priority over anything else, everything that Holly was, everything that she used to be, was chipped away and shoved off to the side, leaving only the vain, egotistical Holly we all met in Half-Genie Hero.
General
So! Onto some significantly lighter stuff! And as a side-note, if you've read Living Memoir, assume this is the Holly from there. If you have not, all you need to know is that after HGH, Holly was forced to reflect on herself and decided that her previous methods weren't working, so she went to Shantae with the plan of shadowing her, soaking in some of her newfound fame by proxy, and keeping herself alive that way. Shantae, meanwhile, was NOT pleased to see Holly as soon as she remembered who she was, and it was only when a slip-up from Holly made her realize there was more to her than the vain exterior and led to her learning Holly's backstory did she agree to the deal - with the stipulation that Holly consider becoming a hero herself. And thus begins the redemption arc!
Anyway...a little known fact about Holly is that she's an entomology nerd - well, arthropodology nerd, if you want to get technical. This is partially because of Wilbur, because of course it is, but this even extended to her past self as well, with only her parents and a select few knowing about it then. At first she hid it because she thought it was embarrassing, then she hid it because it would stain her image, and after HGH she hides it precisely BECAUSE of Wilbur, and all the, ah...negative associations her former pet brings with him. Shantae ended up learning about it when she's tried to figure out a trick with her spider form, and Holly, having been watching for over an hour and now bored and mildly annoyed, gave her the exact tip she needed, causing Shantae to very quickly round on her with a "how did you know how to do that" once she did figure out the trick.
A lot of Holly's egotism is just bluster, especially post-HGH where she's been forced to reflect on her past actions and herself as a person - once you understand that, it's honestly not that hard to get along with her, as she's not really actively malicious and more just overly confident and self-appraising most of the time. She can be hurtful, for sure, but it's very easy to tell when she's just being careless versus when she's actively targeting you. A lot of her best relationships are with people who get this, such as Lobster Siren, Harmony, and Shantae - though, in the latter case, Holly still grates on Shantae's nerves sometimes. Especially early on when she's just beginning to figure out how to be a good person again.
Holly grew up in a rather...tumultuous time for Sequin Land's royal family, as when Holly was born the land was under the reign of Queen Echidna, one of the most tyrannical figures in Sequin Land's history. Petty, vain, and cruel, Echidna demanded in all but words to be treated as a goddess wherever she went, and any town who didn't do so - or, worse, happened to have their attention on someone Echidna saw as "unworthy," which was everyone besides herself - the town was condemned to death. Holly never met the woman herself, but her parents were sure to teach her how to act if she ever did show up, as was the case with every child during her reign. She and her followers were ousted and exiled to an island shortly after Holly began her operations with Wilbur, but that never really lessened the childhood boogeyman of the old queen, and Holly just...kinda assumed all royalty was like that. No one ever realized this, of course, up until Shantae was told she was going to be visited by Giga Mermaid by some mermaid guards one morning, and Holly promptly panicked. Shantae...actually has a theory, regarding Echidna and her followers and their possible descendants - Echidna was well-known for using snake iconography, after all, and Shantae's experience in the Tan Line Temple is practically burned into her memory...but she figures Holly would rather not know.
Though Holly isn't really a fighter, she is a surprisingly good acrobat. Supernaturally good, actually, being far more flexible and durable than any human reasonably could be. This has less to do with her formerly being a half-pixie and more to do with the "living memory" thing; her body's basically made out of condensed magic, much like the more humanoid forms taken by - ironically enough - genies when they're outside the Genie Realm and are trying to interact with humans, though obviously weaker with the downside of having to rely on others to maintain her form. And yet, in spite of all that...Holly cannot dance. At all. Which continues to irk her no matter how hard she tries. She's taken lessons from Shantae, with...mixed success.
Anyway! I'm going to stop there...at least, for normal, canon Holly. But, as some of you may know, there's also the Reversal AU, and while Holly isn't swapped with anyone, she gets it both better and worse thanks to the differing main cast!
Reversal AU
Starting with what would be the events of HGH, Holly is immediately treated with much more hostility than canon. Unlike Shantae, who mostly saw Holly as an annoyance up until she enacted her plan and even then still managed to be relatively chill, with R!Risky...the Dynamo is weighing a lot more on her mind, giving her a lot of pent-up stress and anger she refuses to let out, and not ONLY is Holly stepping on a nerve taking Risky's job when she's already worried about being replaced, but she presents a much more acceptable target for her ire that Risky is more than happy to take it out on. Holly dishes out some vitriol in return, but doesn't really think much of it until she enacts her plan.
Because unlike Shantae, who is mad about the whole thing but still managing to act like herself, when R!Risky comes back to a memory-less Scuttle Town, she, well. Saying "she goes ballistic" is technically accurate, but not quite fitting. Saying "she is so utterly furious that with one more push she ends up committing actions her canon self would approve of" is both accurate and appropriately fits the severity. Risky is not just mad. She is on an active warpath, and when Holly realizes this, she...finds herself to be a bit worried. More worried than she has been in a long while. By the time Risky reaches the top of the tower, Holly's worried enough that she actually tries to negotiate instead of monologuing to Risky, trying to convince her to let her go, pointing out that, if Mimic doesn't get his memories back, he'll never build the Dynamo, and she won't be out of a job! ...Which only serves to tap dance alllllllll over Risky's buttons, getting her even more livid, and Holly quickly learns the consequences of her actions as soon as Wilbur's done.
Remember that "with one more push she ends up commiting actions her canon self would approve of" bit? Yeah, that last thing was the push. Holly starts to flicker in-and-out, much like she does in Half-Genie Hero, and panics as she realizes she's going to fade - only for Risky to grab her by the collar of her outfit and pull her right up close and personal, telling her that Risky isn't going to let her fade...something that Holly would find a lot more reassuring if Risky wasn't wearing a vindictive smirk about two inches away from a scowl as she was saying it. Risky continues, saying that fading would be the easy way out, so she's going to make sure to remember her, because she's not letting Holly take the easy way out. No, she wants Holly to stew, to wallow in her complete failure, to reflect on what an utterly miserable and hollow life she's led, that the only way she's been able to live is to take away the life and times of others...and with that cheery note, Risky kicks Holly off the edge of the tower.
After she has a moment to calm down and collect her thoughts, R!Risky is...honestly disturbed by how far she went with Holly. While none of her friends have any sympathy for the living memory, and their reactions to being told what Risky did are essentially just "good riddance," Risky still can't help but think that she was rather extreme with Holly, no matter how bad she really was. Not to mention, the lie about her being a half-genie hasn't been cleared up, so while Risky does know she's a memory, her logical assumption is that Holly was a half-genie before she ended up turning into a living memory...and any potential chance of connection has been ruined by Risky's actions. While she's wrong on that front, she is right about her actions biting her in the ass later...
Holly isn't relevant again until the end of the adventure, where Captain Shantae's plan finally swings into action, and - well, I'm not going into it in detail here, because I DO plan on writing that Reversal AU HGH post at some point, but just know that, similar to how HGH is Risky's most drastic and extreme plan for her ultimate goal of obtaining power, the Reversal AU equivalent is Captain Shantae's most drastic and extreme plan for her ultimate goal of obtaining control, and more specifically recruiting Risky to her side. And when that fails, when her plan begins to fall apart around her ears and Risky firmly denies her, ready to fight and escape her clutches...that's when Captain Shantae unveils her most drastic measure of all - a trussed, gagged, and terrified Holly Lingerbean, much to Risky's shock and horror.
Captain Shantae explains that she saw the memory-less Scuttle Town, and figured it'd make a good back-up plan if Risky wouldn't join her willingly, and so sent out a few men to scout out the remains of Tassel Town to see if they could reverse-engineer Holly's method...then, they saw a dazed and barely conscious Holly Lingerbean, and Captain Shantae got a better idea - why bother trying to make her own method of memory removal when she could, ah, coerce the source? Risky shakes off her disturbance and tells Captain Shantae that she won't just stand still and let her take her memories, but Shantae then cheerily informs her that she anticipated that, and thus coerced Holly into doing a few test drives. And then, in comes...well, I'm not going to spoil what would be the final boss here.
Anyway, after that's defeated and the Chimera Pirates are thwarted once again, Risky hightails it out of there with Holly in tow, finding herself back in Scuttle Town, where she's congratulated by her friends and Mimic apologizes for being so ignorant as to how Risky was feeling, and that it's clear that the Dynamo is no match for her in terms of being an effective guardian. That just leaves the matter of Holly...and, almost immediately, they both try to apologize at the same time, with Risky stopping herself first and letting Holly go ahead. Holly then explains that, between Risky's dressing-down and Captain Shantae kidnapping her, forcing her to use her memory-altering powers when she didn't want to, and just generally putting her in mortal peril, she's gotten a major reality check, and after reflecting on herself and reevaluating her goals, she wants to make amends for how many lives she might have ruined over the years. In turn, Risky apologizes for how extreme she was in handling Holly, that at the very MINIMUM kicking her off the tower was completely unnecessary, never mind anything else, and with the bad blood between them cleared, the two become friends.
Post-HGH, Holly is already on the side of good in the Reversal AU, and she's effectively acting as...R!Risky's unofficial lawyer, in a sense? Her first action was to immediately strongarm Mayor Scuttlebutt into giving Risky better wages, as after having taken the job herself she knows full well that the pay is not enough for the amount of shit Risky has to deal with, and after that she just...kept it up with some of the other troubles Risky faced. She didn't mean to become Risky's pseudo-lawyer, but neither of them are really objecting, and they have a fairly good relationship going. Probably better than canon Shantae and Holly Lingerbean, funnily enough. I imagine she's not involved in what would be Seven Sirens, but that could change...
Okay, NOW I'm done! That took a while even with the extra time I gave myself, so I hope all the Holly Lingerbean fans are happy! In any case, here's to 2024, and have a Happy New Year!
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CHAPTER 9 LETS FUCKING GOOOO (get ready for a yapfest, where most of it will probably be uncomprehensible because language can’t begin to capture the emotions your writing makes me feel) also !! add me to the taglist please and thank you<3
It is t-minus three days, until the worst Friday of your life. - already nervous and the chapter just started but fuck it we ball
you figure it’s probably just the breakfast from yesterday at La Mattina settling in your stomach— the way you scare me but still make me laugh
He does not care this much, he doesn’t even have basic reading comprehension— RICHIE HELL YEAHHHHH (and he calls her cousin🥹)
also big shout out to you author for making it so clear which texts were sent by what person (so how her texts are cursive and richie’s texts are bold) bc some fics make it so hard to differentiate who’s talking/texting!!<3<3
daddy - POR QUE. i know he didn’t mean it like that but shshshdh
See u chip - this is the cutest nickname!! everyone in that poll can fight me idc idc
It’s time to eat a whole freezer cake and lay in your pyjamas all day and interact with not a single soul on this entire planet. - me celebrating doing the bare minimum!! (but it’s still huge to me so i understand chip well)
To the air, more accurately, but, y’know, same thing. - [cries in norwegian]
You’re gonna get dinner, with Richie, this Friday. - OMGGGG HINTS FOR FRIDAY👀👀
THE SWITCH OVER TO CARMEN HELL YEAHHHH - fuckn delicious freezer cake for you author!!
He really needs his sister. - 🫶🏼 i feel like this is layered (like the carmenized onion)
you’re gonna work as a bottle girl for the rest of your life - his worst nightmare fr, worse than the restaurant closing actually
he’s never gonna get his shit together so he’s never gonna get to call you his - SHUT UPPP HOW COULD YOU DROP THIS ON ME😭😭
He’s still gonna be him - BABYBOY THATS NOT A BAD THING😭 LET ME PROTECCCC
Sisyphean nightmare - YOUR WAY WITH WORDS I LOVEEEE IT
He smells your shampoo, in his hair, that helps. - the way your chapters always make me cry from either the fluff or the sad
he has to hide his smile with his hand - THEM
So good to him, too good to him. Too good to anyone - 😭💓🫶🏼😭🫶🏼😭💓
Carmen so, so fucking desperately wants to ask you to come to The Bear, right now. - BALEGDEH
he knows it’d be perfect cannon fodder to be teased into oblivion. - NO BC LIKE IVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THIS *A LOT* WHAT WILL RICHIE THINK OF CARM AND CHIP. Like thinking of how he and mikey acted at christmas after seeing claire makes me wonder how he’d act when finding out about carm and chip (also carm is only able to date girls with c names apparently <even tho chippy is a nickname but hush>)
looks to his best friend - 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼
he’s not you. - LMAO
he can’t find your repair expenses anywhere on here. - OOOP CHIPPY IS ABOUT TO GET CAUGHT
“I’m not fuckin’ high, cousin—” - ISBRIFBRIRKR
also bet carmen doesn’t have a problem with the two hours when it means TWO HOURS OF CHIP IN HIS RESTAURANT WHERE HE CAN SNEAK GLANCES AT HER
“What’s uh— Why d’you call Tony ‘Chip’?” - the way you’re nailing his voice!!
“S’ not dark, kinda, it’s just, y’know. Personal.” - WAY TO BUILD TENSION AUTHOR. it’s very clear you’re a(n amazing) screenwriter
Mikey got to do that first, too, eh? - STAPH
he's willing to admit it, for you. - RICHIE AND CHIP BESTIES YEEEHAWWWW
“You really wanna fuckin know, huh?” Richie tilts down his head, teasing. - i love this
“Oh, fuck, you fuckin’ like her, don’t’chu, cousin? You fuckin’ dog.” - SKJDIDJFKD
Y’have my blessing. - CUTE
“Didn’t ask for it.” - CUTER
“Don’t gimme no talk back, she was my boy first, a’right?” - CUTEST (ok carmy is cutest but im doing a thing here)
“Gone, cousin.” - it’s cute that you think that richie!! have a cookie!!
“Uh, one sec, I just need to finish this fuckin’—” He shakes his hand in the air, “Whatever the fuck this is.” - again nailing his character
If he had a… lapse in behaviour, and it got back to you, would that ruin him? - you forget how she met you carm, having a meltdown in the freezer
He needs to find your invoice. - he’s so cuteee
Maybe he should just ask you, instead. Let Nat thank you for the heating pad she’s been loving, properly. Have dinner, all together, in an actual family home, instead of just each other's apartments. That'd be nice. - that’s so sweet but i fear it won’t happen, at least not YET
He’ll make you something off menu, on Friday. - HES THE SWEETEST
You’re coming before the rush, anyways, he’ll have time to play, on Friday. - 👀👀👀
He’s gonna do right by you, this Friday - he owns my heart
But right now, it’s Thursday night, and you’ve finally finished Carmen’s piece for The Bear - OMG I FORGOT ABOUT THIS MASTERPIECE, THE CUTEST GIFT EVER
You know you told him if he didn’t like it, he didn’t have to put it up, but admittedly, if he doesn’t like it, you will be crushed. - mood
Each square a snippet, a photo transfer. The squares themselves are messy, sun damaged, bleach stained, light flared. All twinged blue and yellowish. But so perfectly cut and curated. - the way you make it so easy to picture it, ugh we stan!!
Mikey. The only transfer completely unbleached, unaltered, unruined. He’s holding two cut outs. One, Food & Wine and the other, a small section in the off off off pages of the New York Times. - SHUT UP THATS THE CUTEST THING EVER TO EXIST
So so proud, silently, just with you— Couldn't look soft. Carmen does not know this photo exists. - Im gonna cry
You can only imagine the stress you could’ve eased, during their fire safety test - chip is such a slay
*the piece* is magnificent and perfect in every way and you did that!!
You took inspiration from the way his brain works - AWWWWW:3
He’s awfully inspiring. - the love that they have for each other is just everything. they are everything
You’re excited, to show this to him tomorrow, on Friday. Hopefully all goes well, on Friday. - EVIL
You’re gonna do right, by Carmen, on Friday. - SOULMATES🫶🏼
I almost briefed over all of these past few chapters to be nothing more than snippets in a chapter - i really really REALLY appreciated that you did in fact not do that
if you made it through this whole ask, god fnkn bless, looking forward to the master’s thesis i’ll write in your askbox after the next chapter
I had no idea people could make asks this long; like i mean on a character count level-- Did anyone know you could do this fr-- ANYWAYS I WANNA YAP BACK BUT I'M GONNA PUT A KEEP READING BUT PLEASE DO OPEN THIS THERE'S GONNA BE A POLL I WANT YOU CUTIES TO ANSWER
First of all, of course I will add you to the taglist, thank you for the gift of an essay everytime, i love u <3
I am ALL about Fear and Laughter. If I ever make business cards, that'll probably be the tagline. We ball.
It did make me laugh that you went RICHIE HELL YEAH after 'he doesn't have reading comprehension. I buried the lead on who the he in question was on purpose, and i was wondering if everyone would clock at that line immediately oh, it's richie. I'm so mean.
As for texting, I did read another person's fic and saw they put like screennames and sending times and i was like ah fuck, shoulda done that, but continuity,,,, so i didn't switch it up. Plus I enjoy thematically that Tony is italics, Carmen is italic/bold, and Richie is bold. I feel like it just kinda makes sense, character wise, that Tony and Richie are on either end of the spectrum and Carmen is inbetween.
They've gotta get an HR if Richie says daddy to anyone's face besides Tony frfr,
And THIS is where the new poll comes in, because you all SAY YOU WANNA FUCKIN KISS MIKEY, SO
Personally I do like Chippy a lot, not to colour your opinions. You'll see why i like it, eventually. And I'm sure when that happens we'll talk about it ad fuckin nauseam (and I'll eat it up, I will)
I love doing Carmen's perspective, it's like free therapy, realizing the way he and I both think is fucking crazy and I need to relax. He really does need his sister, poor bug. I genuinely do wonder how that's gonna be handled, in season 3.
HIS LITTLE STREAM OF CONSCIOUSNESS PANIC YESSIRRR, Bottle Girl Tony = Hell, Never gonna actually date Tony = Mega Hell, He's Still Gonna Be Him = Super Awful Ultra Hell
So many (2) people enjoyed Sisyphean nightmare, I think I just have tumblr accent, honestly.
I'm so glad, that the shampoo thing happened honestly. I know that's crazy to say it like that, as the writer, as I planned it, but i didn't think I'd be able to call back to it all that much-- But I get to call back to it so fucking much, and it's always either heartbreaking or adorable, or both, and I lovveee both.
The idea that anyone has been thinking about a plot line that has yet to arise alot is like-- Like my brain melted. Like that's so. I'm a puddle. Puddle in your hands. BUT YES, I did have to think on that absolutely. It's a weird line to tow, right? Because Richie's gotten more respectful since then, and he's actual friends with Tony-- But like,,, bro is still a bro, at the end of the day.
CHIPPY IS ABOUT TO GET CAUUGGHTTTT, thank god someone laughed at the I'm not fuckin high line, I was worried.
“What’s uh— Why d’you call Tony ‘Chip’?” - the way you’re nailing his voice!! Did you see my ask saying i'm never sure about Carmen's dialogue and are now trying to reassure me? It's working, if you are.
WAY TO BUILD TENSION AUTHOR. it’s very clear you’re a(n amazing) screenwriter Daww, too nice to me, it IS really how I think Richie would navigate this Chip story, though, you'll see why there's,,,, pause about it, eventually.
“Gone, cousin.” - it’s cute that you think that richie!! have a cookie!! Listen, we don't KNOW how many times Tony's listened to Wannabe by the Spice Girls. Probably would need more than a single word though, Rich. A touch dramatic, cousin.
All Tony and Carmen wanna do this Friday is impress each other, and that's totally exactly what's gonna happen idk what y'all are buggin abouttttttt
I'm so glad folks like the piece, i was worried I explained it bad/it's just kinda stupid-- I just felt like, Carmen doesn't give abstract art vibes. I felt like photography worked a lot better for him. It also gave me the opportunity to slip in more Mikey, of which I think he is mentioned literally at least once every chapter. Bro is the phantom in the pages. i adore him.
I am also very glad that I didn't end up doing just snippets from the Consultation chapter to now. I was worried they'd give off filler vibes, when turned into full on chapters, but looking at them all now, i'm like it would've been an insane injustice to not give them all full breathing room. And now i think there's a lot more to sink into and give a fuck about!! Which is gonna make Friday hurt all the more <3
Anyways, thank you thank you for yapping, and i seriously need to go the fuck to sleep fuck i'm gonna be so groggy for work i'm gonna NAP ON THE BUS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME!!!
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NEW CHAPTER FOR FORMALDEHYDE BC I DECIDED TO NOT LISTEN TO THE POLL
Enjoy!
Take My Tea With Formaldehyde
[Start] [<Previous] [Next>]
Chapter 8: Am I Pretty Now?
(More beneath the cut)
Mumbo felt rather pleased with himself. He had managed to get his hands on an Ariana Griande concert ticket. It hadn’t been his priority at all but he saw that the tickets had been released so he decided to buy one. He smiled to himself when he noticed that the tickets were sold for a rather affordable price as well, which meant that it didn’t feel like a waste of money. Instead it felt like a treat. Considering the fact that everything felt so confusing and messy lately, he felt like he really needed to give himself something.
The concert was, as always, great. Though it always felt weird that she had gone from a small artist to one of the most popular artists, if not the most popular. A part of him still thought of her as a small, unknown artist, even if he knew that wasn't the truth. It didn't really matter, her music was still great, and he still enjoyed the things she did.
But even if the show was great, Mumbo couldn't help but notice one thing. Ariana was moving her hands weirdly.
Or more accurately, she seemed to be struggling to move her hands normally. She struggled to use them, meaning that she either held the mic or not at all. Sure, she had an in-ear, but sometimes she used regular microphones. Not that Mumbo really knew why. It was odd to see her struggle, it looked as if she was hurt. As if she had someone hurt her hands.
Mumbo wasn’t the only one who noticed. He heard someone behind him whisper about it.
"Is she okay?" They said, tone worried. "She seems unable to use her hands."
"I don't know." Another person responded. "Her hands look hurt."
Mumbo had noticed that as well, they looked bruised, damaged. Wasn't it weird that both Grian and Ariana had hurt their hands? Rather odd coincidence. He shrugged it off, stuff like that happened.
He hoped Ariana was okay.
Later when Mumbo was scrolling through social media he saw a few posts writing about her damaged hands. Posts pointed out how she pulled her sleeves over knuckles in selfies she posted, or avoided putting photos of her hands in them.
Some posts had photos from the concert, with red circles around her hands. The comments were filled with concerned fans, or people saying that it probably wasn't a big deal.
Mumbo hoped she was okay.
~
Ariana is on TV, it's a talk show again. Her brown hair is slightly wavy, and she has a pink hair clip in it. She has rather soft makeup this time, just enough pink eyeshadow to bring out her dark brown eyes.
She seems to have a rather nice time, even if something seems to be making her anxious. She's fidgeting with her sleeve, smiling as she answers questions. Despite the anxiety she seems to be feeling, she actually looks relaxed.
The talkshow host, a woman with long blonde hair, looks kind and genuine. Her smile is so different from other people who have interviewed Ariana.
"I'm so sorry, and I hope you don’t mind me asking," The talk show host says, looking at the cards in her hand. They seem to be there mostly for support. She has asked a bunch of questions and has rarely looked at the cards. It seems as if she's actually interested in what Ariana is saying. "But a lot of people, myself included, have noticed that your hands seem to have been hurt somehow, what happened? You can pass on this question if you want." She offers kindly.
"No, it's okay, I've been getting quite a lot of questions myself." Ariana replied, smiling. "Well, I hurt them, to put it simply. "
"Pardon my curiosity, but how? Was it a dance accident or?" The interviewer asked.
Ariana laughed slightly, shaking her head. “I mean, a dance accident would make sense, but you don't really hurt yourself like that when dancing." She explained, resting her hands in her lap. "I also wish I could say it was for a good reason, but, this is a bit silly, I just hurt them whilst boxing."
"You box?" The host said, looking a bit surprised.
"Yeah, I do." Ariana smiled. "It's not something a lot of people know. It's my preferred form of working out.
“I see," The host said, her smile matching Ariana's. "But are your hands okay?”
“Ah, they’re better, I'll say that. It’s just a case of boxer’s knuckles. I’ve been to the doctor and I've gotten it treated, I'm just going to struggle to hold a microphone for a while.” Ariana shrugged it off casually.
“Oh, I see. I hope they get better.” The talkshow host said earnestly.
“Thank you.” Ariana smiled, and with that the conversation was over.
The interviewer then turned to the audience, to move on from the topic.“Now, let me introduce the world famous popstar and drag queen, Scottsune Miku!" She announced, gesturing towards a portion of the stage.
Scottsune Miku came out on stage. She greeted the host and Ariana with a genuine smile, before sitting down next to Ariana.
"Scottsune it's a pleasure to-"
Mumbo turned off the TV. Grian would be over soon.
~
To Mumbo, making tea was almost therapeutic. It helped him calm down, focus on the amount of tea leaves, how hot the water needed to be, and how long it needed to brew.
He made tea if he felt stressed, angry, sad, frustrated, or any negative emotion. If he felt bad, then there would be a pot filled with tea almost immediately.
This, however, was not one of those days.
This was one of those rare days when things seemed strangely fine. Grian was laying on Mumbo's couch, just watching videos on his phone, whilst Mumbo was in the kitchen making some tea for them.
Sure, there were awkward silences and a weird tension in the air even during the okay days, but they had become a lot more bearable. A lot nicer than the others.
It almost made Mumbo forget about the bad days.
Mumbo filled a plate with biscuits, and went out into the living room. He placed the tea, milk, honey, and biscuits on the table, before sitting down next to Grian on the couch.
As soon as Mumbo picked up his book to read, Grian put his head in Mumbo's lap. He often did that.
However, it took Mumbo a while to realise that he was playing with Grian's hair. He had just started doing it, and by god, was Grian's hair soft. It was also rather long. Not at all as well trimmed as it used to be. It used to reach just above his jaw, curling in such a way that it looked shorter…but now it was down by the nape of his neck.
It looked good.
Grian seemed very content with the fact that Mumbo was playing with his hair. His eyes were closed, and his hand rested on top of his phone that was laying on his chest. He seemed at peace. Calm. Relaxed, for once.
"Mumbo?" Grian asked, his eyes still closed.
"Mm?" Mumbo responded, trying to focus on the words in his book instead of how soft Grian's hair was. He was failing miserably.
"I feel like going out again." Grian says.
Mumbo nearly drops his book onto Grian's head in response. "What?"
He hadn't expected Grian to say that. It’s only been three weeks since the whole incident, and sure Grian's hands have healed, but…if Mumbo was honest, he didn't really feel all that comfortable going out. He didn't want that to happen again.
"I wanna go out again." Grian says, as if Mumbo hadn’t heard him. "I think it would be fun."
"You're sure?" Mumbo asks. "What if-"
"Mumbo, it will be fine." Grian cut him off, looking up at Mumbo. "I had fun, despite what happened. Besides, I don't want that to stop me from having fun and doing things I like." He sounded rather determined, and that convinced Mumbo.
The two of them decided to go out the next day, since that was a Friday and neither would be at work on the Saturday.
Still, Mumbo couldn't help but feel as if something would go wrong.
~
This time, they go without Iskall. Somehow it feels like both of them want to go alone, for it to be just the two of them. Neither says it and neither suggests bringing Iskall. They just…understand.
In the line to the club, Grian looks giddy, almost like a child, excitedly bouncing in place. Mumbo smiles fondly. Maybe it was a good idea to go out, despite what happened last time. If he'd known that Grian would be this happy, he wouldn't have hesitated at all, and would have agreed immediately.
Surprisingly, the queue moves quickly, and they're inside sooner than expected. Grian grabs Mumbo's hand as soon as they step inside, dragging him out on the dance floor. Mumbo doesn't even get a chance to protest. Not that he minds.
Mumbo can't dance, not in the slightest. He moves awkwardly, or almost not at all. It doesn’t seem to matter. Grian just seems happy that Mumbo is dancing with him, even if he's far from graceful.
Unlike last time, Mumbo doesn't sit down to take a break, instead he just follows Grian's movements. The way Grian smiled when he realised Mumbo was still dancing with him successfully calmed down most worries Mumbo had.
He doesn't know how, but at some point he gets a drink and Grian gets one too. It takes a while for him to realise, but Grian is the one paying for his drinks.
"Grian-" Mumbo says, holding a gin and tonic in his hand. It must be his third one, and they haven't been out that long. "You know you don't have to pay for my drinks, right?"
Grian gestured vaguely, trying to brush off Mumbo's comment. "Don't worry about it," He slurred, his alcohol tolerance lower than Mumbo's. Not surprising, he was shorter after all. "I want to, besides I've got more than enough money."
Mumbo wondered what he meant by that, surely being an accountant couldn't pay that well. Though, maybe he worked for a good company?
"You're sure? I can pay for myself, if you-"
Grian cut him off, placing his hand on top of Mumbo's. The look he gave him was strangely intense and rather determined. "Mumbo. I seriously want to, and I have a fair amount of money that I don't really have use for. Let me pay for you."
"Oh-" Mumbo was a bit unsure of what to say, but he guessed that maybe he shouldn't question it. Grian seemed absolutely certain. "I-...thank you."
"My pleasure." Grian said, smiling a bit. He pulled away his hand and tilted his drink slightly at Mumbo. Mumbo silently wished Grian had let his hand stay.
Sometime after that brief conversation, Grian drags Mumbo back out onto the dance floor. As the time has passed, more people have entered the club, and they end up being very close to each other. Mumbo feels a warmth pool in his stomach at the proximity.
Despite them being at a club filled with people, it feels weirdly intimate.
Mumbo feels slightly dizzy, but in a good way. Almost as if he's floating. He has definitely drunk more than he thought. A lot more…and, what's the time? He hasn't checked his watch in a while.
Maybe he should, it might be a good idea-
His thoughts get cut off by Grian suddenly kissing him on the cheek. Mumbo gives him what he assumes is a questioning look, and Grian just shrugs in response.
"Felt like it." He said, casually, as if he always just randomly gives Mumbo kisses. Somehow, it actually feels fairly normal.
They still don't move off the dance floor. In reality, it would probably be next to impossible, there's far too many people around them. Neither really seems to want to sit down, and continue to dance…if you can call it that, it's more moving to the best of their ability on the crowded dance floor.
“Mumbo?” Grian whispered, the two so close together, that his voice could somehow be heard over the music and the people around them.
“Hmm?” Mumbo hummed, looking at Grian, who was looking at him with half-lidded eyes.
“Do you…” Grian began, stopping himself for a second, tilting his head to the side. The movement was a bit awkward, clumsy almost. “...Do you think I’m pretty?” He asked, smiling in a strangely shy way. He played with a lock of hair. If Mumbo was more sober he probably would have wondered why Grian looked like that.
Mumbo had difficulty processing the question, the alcohol making his brain work slower, worse than usual. “W..what?”He said in response, vaguely aware of the fact that he was standing up.
Grian leaned forward, so he could whisper into Mumbo’s ear. “Do you think I’m pretty?” He asked again, his lips centimetres away from Mumbo’s ear. Mumbo felt his breath on his neck.
When Mumbo finally managed to process the question he felt a smile break out on his face. He couldn’t stop it. He didn’t want to stop it.
He nodded in response. “Yes.” He said. “Yes, you’re very pretty.” He gently tucked a hair strand behind Grian’s ear, just so he could see him more clearly.
Grian looked surprised, his eyes wide, a faint blush on his face. Was it there because of the alcohol or-
“Really?” Grian breathed. “Am I prettier than Ariana?”
Mumbo felt his head spin, half wondering why Grian asked that. He barely realised that it was a rather strange question to ask. “Yes, always.” Mumbo replied, earnestly. “You’re the prettiest. Always the prettiest.” His words slurred together.
Grian seemed very pleased with that, and put his head against Mumbo’s chest. “The prettiest…” He whispered, a smile on his lips.
They lose track of time, and before they know it, it has to be after 2am. They have sat down at some point, Grian leaning against Mumbo. Mumbo thinks that some people have to think that they're a couple. He doesn't mind that. He wonders if Grian minds that, but realises that he'd have to ask if he wants to know.
They should probably leave. It's late and they should probably get home.
Mumbo asks if Grian wants to come to his place, and Grian nods silently, his arms tightly around Mumbo's body
They take a cab together, and start to giggle and laugh and neither knows why they're laughing. Grian holds Mumbo's hand tightly, as if he won't ever let go.
Mumbo doesn't want him to.
~
Mumbo and Grian half walked, half stumbled into Mumbo's apartment. Almost falling onto the floor in the hallway. The two of them were laughing drunkenly as they went inside, the type of laughter that bubbles in your stomach and is impossible to stop. The type that makes you laugh until your stomach hurts. They clung onto each other for support, which didn't exactly work. Neither was particularly stable.
Mumbo somehow managed to sit down on the stool in the hall and started to take off his shoes. He struggled but eventually got them off.
Grian laughed even harder when he saw how Mumbo almost failed at the simple action. Mumbo laughed as well, throwing his shoes at Grian. The shoes missed Grian completely, since Mumbo's already terrible aim seemed to have somehow gotten even worse, and Grian fell down on the floor, still laughing.
Grian clumsily pulled off his own shoes. He sat on the floor for a short while until Mumbo tried to help him stand up. Neither could seem to stop laughing, the happiness felt sticky and sweet, and it held them firmly in its grasp. Not that either could really complain. When was the last time they properly laughed together?
Grian somehow managed to stand up properly, smiling at Mumbo. Mumbo smiled back, and ended up looking directly into Grian's eyes. The laughing stopped, though not in a bad way. The air felt electric, and neither looked away.
Mumbo had known for a long while that Grian's eyes were blue, but oh. Oh, how they were beautiful. They were like an ocean, a gorgeous mix of blues. Earlier Mumbo would've assumed that they were just light blue, but now he wondered how he had ever missed the specks of midnight blue in them.
Grian breathed, his eyes stuck on Mumbo. Mumbo's lips felt dry. Grian licked his lips, as if they were dry. Mumbo noticed that Grian's chest was rising and falling slowly.
Grian leaned clumsily against Mumbo saying nothing. Grian then tilted his head to the side, a strange sort of curiosity and wonder in his eyes.
Mumbo mirrored his movements, not breaking eye contact. He couldn't. Even if he had wanted to, he wouldn't have been able to. He kinda…
Mumbo was unsure of who made the first move, who put their hand on the other's back, who breathed in before taking the plunge. Maybe they did it at the same time. Because suddenly, his body was once again pressed against Grian's, but this time they weren't dancing.
No, this time his lips were pressed against Grian's, as he felt Grian kiss him with a newfound hunger. As if he was starving, as if he couldn't keep himself back.
Mumbo slowly slid his hand up Grian's shirt, tracing his spine with his fingertips. He felt Grian gasp against his mouth, felt him tense up for a second before relaxing into Mumbo's touch.
A part of Mumbo knew he shouldn't be doing this– he knew he wouldn't be doing this if they weren’t so drunk. But they were. And they were too far gone to stop.
As if they would've wanted to stop.
Part of Mumbo was screaming at him, knowing that their friendship was too fragile for this, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care, not when Grian was holding on to him, refusing to let go.
He felt Grian's hands in his hair, and the last thing he could properly remember was Grian pulling them towards Mumbo's bedroom
#grian#mumbo jumbo#grumbo#hermitshipping#ariana griande#take my tea with formaldehyde (grumbo fic)#hermitcraft#formaldehyde verse
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Round 1, Side A, Poll 7
The Overseer ( @raybotonline ) VS. Cupid ( @hopelesscalico )
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( art by raybotonline )
What is your baby's name? Pronouns?: The Overseer, any pronouns
Is your baby from a fandom or original?: Completely original OC for my concept PROJECT: ASTIGMATISM!
How old is your baby?: Well, seeing as they are an Nth dimensional entity that is nigh incomprehensible to humanity, we cannot accurately deduce their age using human standards, but they are just a little guy
Tell us about your baby!: The Overseer was created by another Nth dimensional "god"-like entity, and this process split said entity into two entities who operate as one, known as the Storytellers. The Storytellers created the Overseer for the express purpose of creating a small dimension for them to, well, tell a story about. The Overseer, despite having "parents", is often left to its own devices, and it often enjoys people-watching across dimensions, true to their namesake. They cannot speak, and their hair hides one large eye in the center of its face.
Anything else you want to add?: this is a very cute tournament idea! may the best baby win
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( art by hopelesscalico )
What is your baby's name? Pronouns?: its name is cupid and its pronouns are it/she/they/he/bit/pix
Is your baby from a fandom or original?: completely original!
How old is your baby?: she's 13 years old!
Tell us about your baby!: cupid is a character from an original sci-fi story of mine. she is an artificial intelligence turned young god, and she is also a gay little transgender middle schooler! her body is made up of old outdated technology (even more outdated than it is irl, at the time this story takes place) and y2k type trinkets because she is completely and totally OBSESSED w/ outdated tech!! (like flip phones and see-through desktop computers and tamagotchi.) she is extremely silly and curious, and loves exploring the world around her and talking to people! yay! she is a fairly powerful god but has no idea what to do with that power, so she mostly just sits around and plays neopets as the world crumbles around her.
Anything else you want to add?: i more art of her that i could share if need be :3
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[Transcript: My name is Jessica Valenti and since Roe was overturned, I've been documenting the harms caused by abortion bans in a newsletter called "Abortion, Every Day."
I cover everything from legislation and court battles to anti-abortion strategy and language, but the topic that I find myself writing about most, I'm sorry to say, is suffering.
And while Americans know about some of the suffering caused by abortion bans, thanks to the bravery of women like Doctor Dennard, there are hundreds of other stories that go unreported.
I have spoken to a twenty one-year-old woman in Texas who was denied an abortion even though her fetus developed without a head, and a hospital worker in South Carolina who watched a college student die after attempting to end her own pregnancy.
I get more messages every day than I could ever possibly answer. And while I could share stories that would shock and sicken you in the way that I am shocked and sickened every single day doing this work, I wanted to use my time here to stress that this incredible suffering, this cruelty that treats American women as less than human, is all by design.
Despite Republican assurances that cases like Doctor Dennard's are the result of legislative growing pains, or doctors simply not understanding the law. Despite claims that their bans just need to be tweaked or clarified. I want to make clear that all of this pain and suffering was not just expected. It was planned for.
Anti-abortion lawmakers and activists would have voters believe that they had no idea that this is what post-America, post-Roe America, would look like, but they had fifty years to plan for this moment, and they made that plan carefully, strategically, and callously.
Every raped child forced to give birth, every cancer patient denied care, and every woman arrested after having a miscarriage, was accounted for and strategized over.
But with Americans getting angrier and angrier at what abortion bans are doing to their families and communities, Republicans are desperate to hide that truth from voters. They need us to believe that they're not the cruel extremists that their laws show them to be.
And they certainly don't want us to know that they planned for women's deaths in the same way they strategize over a talking point or a poll. And I mean that literally.
For months, I have been tracking a conservative campaign to sow distrust in maternal mortality numbers. Republicans know that the data is going to show that their laws kill women, so they're preemptively claiming that maternal death numbers aren't accurate.
Some states have even disbanded their maternal death review committees entirely, and because the people most likely to die are the most marginalized among us, their hope is that no one will care.
I've also documented how the anti-abortion movement laid the groundwork over months to blame doctors for women's deaths, as if the people working under threat of losing their license or jail time are the problem, and not the laws that prevent them from doing their jobs.
All of which is to say: when Republicans feign surprise or compassion over post-Roe horrors stories, they are lying.
They knew that women would suffer and die as a result of their laws. They decided it was a trade-off worth making, and everything they've done since Roe was overturned has been in service of hiding that fact. Most of those lies are hiding in plain sight.
When Republicans tell Americans that the national fifteen-week ban they're preposing is a reasonable middle ground, they leave out the fact that the law would force women to carry non-viable pregnancies to term.
Their compromise would do to any American capable of pregnancy what Texas tried to do to Kate Cox. And again, this is not an oversight, it is a deliberate part of a much broader extremist strategy.
Right now, there is a quiet, but well-funded, campaign led by the most powerful anti-abortion groups in the country, that is focused entirely on pressuring and forcing women to carry doomed pregnancies to term.
They're not only trying to do away with exceptions for non-viable pregnancies, they're trying to eradicate prenatal testing altogether. It's a lot easier to force women to carry a dying fetus to term if they never get diagnosed to begin with.
When I tell people about this, the question I get asked most often is "Why?" Why would anyone want to deliberately create a world where women are forced to be walking coffins? It is inexplicable until you understand that this has nothing to do with families or babies, but enforcing a worldview that says it's women's job to be pregnant, and to stay pregnant, no matter what the cost or consequence.
But because Republicans don't have the bravery to admit that truth, and because they're afraid fo voters who are more pro-choice than ever, they lie.
They talk about compassion because they know that their laws are cruel. They use the word consensus while passing bans that voters don't want. And they call Democrats extremists while fighting for the right to deny women life-saving abortions in emergency rooms.
And because Republicans know that voters overwhelmingly oppose their bans, they claim to be softening on abortion by pushing one of the biggest lies in abortion politics: exceptions.
Again and again, Republicans deliberately prepose and pass exceptions that no one will ever qualify for. The only purpose they serve is to allow extremist lawmakers to feign moderation, or pretend as if they've conceded something.
And frankly, any Republican who claims that exceptions are real, should have to do so in front of all the people who've been told that they do not qualify for care, even as they went septic or had their uteruses removed.
They should have to defend themselves in front of women like Kate Cox and Doctor Dennard, or Brittany Watts, who wasn't just denied care by a religious hospital when her water broke too early for her pregnancy to survive, but was arrested when she miscarried at home.
The only Republican exception that holds an iota of truth is the one about women's lives, though not in the way that they think. When you look at any Republican life-of-the-mother exception, they all contain a caveat. And that caveat says that women whose lives are at risk can be given abortions, unless the risk is because she's suicidal.
And I want to stress how telling that is. Republicans know that forcing people to be pregnant against their will, will make them want to kill themselves. And they enshrined into law that they don't care.
In a moment when we are hearing so many extreme horror stories, it can be difficult, I think, to get back to that foundational cruelty. That to force someone to be pregnant against their will, for any reason, at any point, causes profound existential harm.
Abortion is healthcare, but it is also freedom. That's why every abortion denied is a tragedy, and increasingly, Americans understand that. They don't want the government involved in their decisions about pregnancy at any point.
The first time I came to D.C. was in 1992. I was thirteen years old, and my mother brought me here for the Pro-Choice March for Women's Lives, maybe some of you were there. Um, I remember men screaming at us from the sidelines, and I remember how confused I was over why they hated us so much.
Today, my thirteen-year-old daughter is in the room, and it's her first time in Washington, and yet somehow, she's here with less rights than I had thirty-two years ago, and I think that we should be ashamed of that.
My deepest hope is that she doesn't need to follow in the steps of her mother and grandmother, and come here decades from now to defend her daughter's humanity. Thank you for your time.
The TikTok end-of-video sound plays and shows that the video was posted to TikTok by @/chaos_disorder.
End Transcript.]
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Leviticus101st makes a roster for Marvel vs Capcom 4
With the upcoming Marvel vs Capcom collection, a lot of people have been hyped for a Marvel vs Capcom 4 and have been making their dream rosters for it. So I thought I’d do the same.
I will admit my main inspiration for doing something like this is the YouTuber Thorgi's Arcade, who I do recommend ya check out especially if you're into fighting games.
Also, the reason I've been posting like this lately is because I want to get the Death Battle Kick Starter in front as many eyes as I can. So if ya can, please consider donating, it's a common joke all they do is Marvel and DC, so if you like this topic, I think you'll want to back this: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/deathbattle/save-death-battle
I’ll be going off of this image made by Dremmin (@/DreminErryDay) on Twitter for the roster size.
So, that means 30 Mahvel Babies and 30 Capsule Computer Characters.
I’m gonna start with the Capcom Characters, mainly because I want the harder one outta the way first………..Also, I want to get the stupid thing I’m gonna do outta the way.
Capsule Competitors
Ryu (Street Fighter): No duh. It’s Ryu. Mr. Capcom Fighting Game himself. Ya gotta put him in. However, here’s my stupid plan. Ryu is going to be the only Street Fighter I’m putting on this roster.
Now hear me out, the big joke with Capcom is that they only care about a few of their franchises. Street Fighter, Resident Evil, and Monster Hunter. And those jokes are accurate, it really has just been those 3. I want to give Capcom’s other IP’s a chance to shine.
However, as a compromise to this I will be making it so fighters have costumes that make them different characters. Think Echo Fighters from Smash or the costume stuff in NRS games. The only
For Ryu, his would be Ken, Akuma, and Sakura.
Not every costume fighter will be from the same franchise, but for Ryu, I wanted to be pretty straight forward.
Chris Redfield (Resident Evil): Yeah, I just want to get the obvious ones outta the way. His three costumes will be Leon, Jill, and Claire.
Monster Hunter…….(Monster Hunter): I guess we could just make the costumes from other outfits from the series.
Alrighty time to get to what I actually want to do.
Dante (Devil May Cry): We’re not quite out of obvious ones yet.
Vergil (Devil May Cry): No dur.
Nero (Devil May Cry): I haven’t talked about how any character would play yet, since all the ones i talked about so far are returning. I feel like Nero would probably hit harder than Dante, but be a bit slower. Maybe more moves featuring his robot hand.
The Arisen (Dragon’s Dogma): All I know about Dragon’s Dogma is that the theme song slaps and The Arisen is a CAC, just make them an all rounder.
Soh (Kunitsu-Gami: Path of the Goddess): The game looks cool, so I wanted to include the MC. Give her the multiple mask stuff and let her call out the villagers. Frank West (Dead Rising): The Dead Rising Remake is on the way. It makes sense to include Frankey Westey. Also, we could make his costumes the other Dead Rising protags.
Regina (Dino Crisis): I saw the polls. Of course she’s gotta be in here. Make her all about gunplay and maybe let her ultimate have a dinosaur come outta nowhere. Costume: Ada Wong
Strider……(Strider): The vs games are all he’s got man. Costumes: Kenji, Ronin, and Ibuki
Fiona Belli (Haunting Ground): Make her dog Hewie do most of the attack and she can use running away from the villains from her game as specials and ults and such.
Hagar (Final Fight): Another no duh one honestly. Costume: Zangief
Phoenix Wright (Ace Attorney): I am convinced the only reason he wasn’t in Infinite was budget. Costumes: Apollo Justice and Ryunosuke Naruhodo.
Miles Edgeworth (Ace Attorney): I just thought it was a good idea. Costumes: Franziska von Karma, Godot, and Manfred von Karma
Steve Spencer (Bionic Commando): The vs games are all he’s got man.
Sissel (Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective): Give him some ghost power and objects and stuff and bam.
Mega Man…..uh forget it, yall get the jist (Mega Man): A have to have in here. We can give him costumes for Protoman, Bass, and Roll.
Mega Man X (Mega Man): He’s got to be here vs games are all us Mega Man fans got aside from the collections. Also, we make his alternate skins Megaman.exe, Starforce Megaman, and Volnutt.
Zero (Mega Man): Competitive players would lose their shit if he wasn’t here. Also, costumes will be MegaMan Zero, Omega, and uh…..OH! Ciel! We’ll go with Ciel.
William Grey (Dark Void): Uhhhhh. Look, I just wanted a variety of fighters okay? I don’t know a damn thing about Dark Void. Uhhh hang on here….He uses high tech gun shit and a jetpack. Just make that into a fighting game character.
Samanoska Akechi (Onimusha): He’s a cool sword fighter. Leave me alone.
Tiffany Lords (Rival Schools): Rival Schools needs a W man, also I didn’t want to just Akira……..Actually ya know what?
Akira Kazama (Rival Schools): She’s basically the icon of this franchise. Costume: Mai Ling
Ran Hibiki (Rival Schools): Real talk, I’m choosing her because Superhero comics love their photographers. Costume: JJJ
Pyron (Darkstalkers): It’s a Capcom crossover. Darkstalkers needs to be here and Pyron was the big bad of the first 2 games, he needs to be in a big crossover.
Morrigan (Darkstalkers): No dur.
Edward Falcon (Power Stone): I just love this dude’s look okay.
Valgas (Power Stone): I need to start getting more villains. And this dude is just a wrestler with a power gem, he’s perfect.
Dr. Edward Bilstein (Star Gladiator): This dude is literally Darth Vader. Why would you not want this? Costume: Sigma
Mahvel Babies
Let’s just shotgun the returning ones. I’ll only say anything for different character costumes.
Iron Man: War Machine, Rescue, and Iron Monger.
Captain America: US Agent, Sam Wilson, and Bucky Barnes
Spider-Man: Miles Morales, Spider-Gwen, and Silk.
Hulk: Red Hulk.
Thor: Leo
Wolverine: Beast, Sabertooth, and Deathstrike
Phoenix: Ingrid (CFE)
Magneto: Nova
Cyclops
Cable
Dr. Doom
Apocalypse
Ultron: Bass.EXE (Mega Man)
Deadpool: Gwenpool
Dr. Strange: Clea
NOW FOR THE LESS BORING PART
Kamala Khan: WHY WASN”T SHE IN INFINITE?! MY DAUGHTER DESERVES IT! That aside, I feel this one is obvious. Have her be a good range character with a bit of rush down. Kamala’s powers are insanely versatile and I think that’s the best way to implement them into a fitting game.
Morph: Just a heads up, I’m going to be referring to Morph here with They/Them pronouns, while to my knowledge they don’t have this gender identity in the books, I just think it’s good to have more nonbinary rep out there. Also, X Men 97 is goated and Morph is also goated there…..watch X-Men 97.
With that addressed, I want to use Morph because their shape shifting would allow for the appearance of characters we couldn’t put in the roster. And I know that’s possible, because that’s what X-Men 97 did with Morph, have them turn into characters they couldn’t fit into the story for cool references and cameos.
Costume: Axl (Mega Man)
Shang-Chi: The movie is goated. Just give him Iron Fist’s moveset. Costumes: Iron Fist, Chun-Li (SF), and Juri(SF).
Mr. Fantastic: Wow, we really have not gotten the FF into any of these games. Like I know Super Skrull is there, but it's still weird. I’d say make him an opposite to Kamala, make him a bit of a grappler with a bit more strength, but slower.
Invisible Woman: It’s gosh diddly darn Sue Storm, of course she’s on here. I say make her a zoner, that feels appropriate with her power set.
The Thing: Grappler. Wow FF has two grappler’s, I wonder if we’ll have two zoners. Costumes: Mr. X (RE), She-Hulk, and William Birkin (RE).
Human Torch: HOLY SHIT WE DO HAVE TWO ZONERS!
DareDevil: Have him use those sticks he throws as projectiles and him be an up close fighter. Also, when he blocks, have him dodge. Costumes: Elektra, Black Widow, and Ada Wong (RE)
Luke Cage: Make him like Scorpion, have him use his chain to bring opponents to him and have him be able to bring the smack down with good defense and heavy, but slow hits.
Vision: Have him be another zoner, his phasing and flight to get distance, and his laser to blast the foe.
Carnage: Rush down. This feels so obvious honestly. Costumes: Venom, Scream, and Mania
Blade: All rounder with his good amount of weapons. Costume: Donovan (Darkstalkers)
Scarlet Witch: Know Asuka from Guilty Gear. Yeah, just make Wanda do that. Costume: Tessa (Red Earth)
Loki: Trickster, technical fighter.
Kingpin: Slow heavy hitter, but what I wanted Kingpin on here because of an idea I had. Have his supers and ranged attacks be lower tier marvel villains. Costume: Red (Mega Man)
OH MY LORD, I’M FINISHED! THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO TAKE ME LIKE A HALF HOUR TOPS! HOLY HELL!
Let me know if ya want me to do DLC or not….I probably will do it if someone asks, but I’m tired.
#marvel#capcom#marvel vs capcom#fighting games#fan made#roster#long reads#honestly#this took way too long#I thought it was just gonna be like a 30 minute thing#but nope#It took me most of the day#I'm mostly just doing this to boost the#Death Battle#kickstarter#Yes#I am purposefully making the tags like this to get as many folks to see this as possible#Also#it is very funny.
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Okay, now that I’m on the computer, I can better organize BP Shop thoughts.
Let’s start big: Master Pairs. I don’t know about all of you, but I have all three of those tickets. I never spent one. I refuse to waste this rare a resource on the MU, and Evelyn never really impressed me much. So I have been waiting all near 14 months for this update.
And it’s a good chance to be Red and Ash.
Given the trailer showed him with the same outfit as Classic Red and Snorlax, there’s a very good chance that Pikachu is just a Master BP Pair. Which, can I just say, would probably cause most of the player base to crack with the ticket? I also means...high likelihood of Support, given that all three of the others are. But I’m sorry, I just can’t see that. Volt Tackle has to be part of this, I refuse to believe it isn’t. And as a Striker with recoil, setting the recoil negation skill as a 3/5 exclusive is a really good way to get people to use all their vouchers or candy. Ash is less guaranteed, but apparently there’s a lot of talk about DeNA needing the rights to monetize him? And that if they don’t have that, he’d have to be a free unit? I don’t know if that’s accurate, but it’s definitely possible here. And in that case...similar deal, Pikachu is Ash’s ace, I can’t imagine it being support. In either situation, I feel nothing but dread, because I don’t want either. And if this is where they come in, the anniversary units themselves are still completely up in the air, which is...dangerous for me. Time will tell, I guess.
The other question is how many Master BP Pairs we get. I don’t imagine it will be that many, especially with how unreasonably slow it is to get one of the Master Vouchers. They really need to make those more accessible. No one’s going to use candy on characters of that limited quality. I’d expect, at most, three. And realistically, the argument against Ash and Red is that so far, it’s always been MU with one of the Legendary Arena Pokemon, or a Battle Facility head. It...very well could be MU, but DeNA seems pretty cognizant of the players’ responses to these units. Nobody, and I do mean nobody, wants to pull MU. If you pulled Cobalion, it was a utilitarian choice, not one you did for love of MU. Every poll, every time someone asks, tends to skew toward Evelyn as the preferred pick, and I’m very confident she’s not all that popular either, because “save the vouchers” tends to blow all three options out of the water. No one likes the current picks. And they have to know that. So I kinda feel like, if they add an MU, it’s going to be really good in whatever role it’s for. Like, possible Moltres with Sun as a supporter kind of stuff as a budget SS Morty.
The other facility master choices, then, would probably be more popular picks. I don’t see Evelyn’s sisters making it in, though they may toss in the green one for being kinda pretty (I can’t remember her name, I don’t know any of them). The big one I anticipate is Palmer. He was apparently in the original trailer for the game, still isn’t here, and is routinely called for. Palmer and Regigigas feels...so very likely. But the other possibility is Ingo and Emmet. Those two are absurdly popular, especially after Legends Arceus, and Master BP pairs would make perfect sense for them. I’d also personally like it as an option that didn’t involve a legendary. They can just have Eelectross/Galvantula and Chandelure. It’s perfect. But I also expect at least one female. They tend to balance a bit. It’s just also that...there aren’t that many to pick from? Maybe Anabel? But that’s the wrong Anabel. Maybe another Chatelaine? Of course my hope would be a Caitlin. She doesn’t battle but it counts! I don’t think I’d necessarily want Gothitelle as a Master BP pair, though. I’d rather a sygna suit, I’d love to see that design. But. Darach could get in with Gallade, as a Psychic-type supporter that can buff crit, and that could be a huge boon to base Caitlin while being thematic. Maybe you can really up the power of these Master BPs and give him Psychic Terrain too? I’m just saying, think about it, DeNA. But the big likely outcome? Battle Tower Leon. I feel like that’s really, really likely too. It’s just...it’s right there.
That leaves the general pool. Again, I don’t know about all of you, but I have 15 tickets ready to go. Considering the last batch was 5, I’m kinda anticipating at least five more. I don’t think they’ll go higher than that, it would be massively overwhelming to newer players, but long-time players have a ton of tickets so who knows. I wouldn’t mind. More options good, and I’m personally in favor of just establishing a new player gift of 3 regular vouchers and 1 Master voucher so players start off with some added tools. But for now, I’m going to assume five.
If it’s not one for each of Sinnoh, Unova, Kalos, Alola, and Galar, I’m gonna be a bit upset, depending on who they choose. Those regions are completely unrepresented in the original five. Kalos got Evelyn, but like...does that really count? I also don’t expect the free event things they’re rerunning to be the BP options. Long-time players would get excited for additions to find out there’s literally nothing new for them. They could be part of it, but I’d say that would be in addition to the five.
These BP pair can be about anyone, but seem to focus on gym leaders, E4, and NPCs. Morty, Surge, and Erika are all gym leaders, so we can reasonably expect the bulk of them to be gym leaders, with maybe some E4 or NPC rep. I will say that, given Zinnia, I don’t anticipate N or Lillie or anyone like that. Zinnia’s not that popular, so I don’t think they’d go too far with it. In fact, neither are Surge or Karen, to my knowledge. So there’s likely a blend of “known popular” like Morty and Erika, and “known lesser character who needs an alt,” like Surge and Karen. I’m going to assume a similar ratio as well. I’m also going to assume these new units will fill particular niches. BP Erika was a great stall unit, and there really aren’t many of those. BP Morty was a rapid defense buffer with Potion; prior, this was only premium. Surge was a rapid crit buffer with attack buffing and paralysis, a fun mix of utility. Karen was Dark damage, which was, and still kinda is, really rare. Zinnia...okay, Zinnia’s Dragon-type damage and flinch rate, neither of those are rare, so maybe one gets to just vibe.
With that in mind, my hopes are Cheryl, Cheren, Valerie, Gladion, and Raihan.
Cheryl would likely be support, and I’m kinda hoping Wailord. She references it in her center dialogue, and I think it’d be a cute combination. My anticipation would be a support that buffs special attack and crit. Not to cap. That would conflict with the premium stuff. But this is a major, major niche that F2P is missing out on, and given that SS Kris’ trainer move is just Torchic’s with special moves up next, I don’t think MU Torchic will get MPR. If it gets a grid at all. A BP pair like Surge that’s like +2 crit and +1 special attack but doesn’t give MPR for that trainer move would still be a massive help.
Cheren I’d like to see with Cinccino as a Tech. I like the idea of having its Tail Slap be a focus, and having kind of a Dojo Gloria style debuff. They can’t do once per hit, that’d be -5 in one shot, which is ridiculous broadly but especially on a free unit. But maybe something like SS May where it’s a -2 on a chosen stat or something. Or, emulate the old King’s Rock set and make him a really good flinch bot. Like. Really good.
Valerie better have Mawile. I’d like it to be another Mega, but even if it’s just regular Mawile, I just want it there. I’m fine with anything, but I’d say Fairy striker. We legitimately don’t have a good one. Valerie’s base form is not a good one. Fairy is a rare damage type, and I think a new addition in the F2P available options would be nice. Play Rough and Terrify and an emphasis on debuffing attack would pair well with Mina for a double damage comp too.
Gladion could get...Crobat? Maybe? Actually yeah, Crobat. Poison Striker. Again, incredibly rare offensive damage type, it’d be nice to get a new option in the F2P pool.
Raihan has two options, both Tech. On the one hand, Turtonator, as a Sunny Day setter, to make the Ryuki fans sad. Seriously, why do people actually want Ryuki? I’m actually asking. The other is Goodra. I love Goodra, if it were in as an F2P Rain Dance user, I’d be all over it.
There are general thoughts based on popularity. Most are lower tier and just want an alt, but I feel like Gladion is supremely called for given the focus on the Aether Family and him not having an alt yet, and Raihan is absurdly popular and a very easy pick here. So character-wise, this feels likely. But there’s one other thing I think is possible. Maybe not likely, but possible.
You know how weather exists in the F2P pool? Like, we have the Tech eggmons, Winona, Blaine, Acerola, and Candice? Weather is double covered, and even compresses roles like flinch, trap, and absurd sync damage in the gacha and story pairs.
When’s F2P Terrain?
Realistically, there’s no substantial difference. If anything, weather’s stronger than terrains, because terrains rarely have additional grid multipliers spread throughout unrelated nonsense, like Sun multipliers were on every Grass type. From a balance perspective, there’s...nothing holding them back from adding Psychic or Electric Terrain. Grassy Terrain maybe. That was recent, and is absurd with SS Morty. But Psychic and Electric are old enough and not any more substantial than weather. I think it’s possible to add those effects to the BP shop.
BP Elesa is...incredibly possible as a setter. I can’t say what she’d have, they’ve used her team by now, but she hits the massive popularity marker and could easily be Electric Terrain. While my hope would be Jasmine and Ampharos, I’m legitimately unsure they’d do that one. It would also be more Johto.
Psychic is way harder. In the regions we’re discussing...Caitlin’s like the only viable option. Maybe Lucian. Maybe. But Olympia and Avery aren’t in the game, and are unlikely to debut here, while the earlier generation pick of Sabrina would be more Kanto. I’ve expressed already I wouldn’t really want Gothitelle as anything less than a Sygna Suit, given it’s her ace, so my hope is Sigilyph. Come on, you know that would be a cool Tech! Psychic Terrain, give it the Cosmic Power/Stored Power combo, it’d be fun.
I also think some Zone effects could easily be made F2P, but there’s no way while they’re still introducing them, and this post is long enough. My honest hopes involve things outside of this. Realistically, I’d love Jasmine to get something, I’d love Roxanne and Golem given that she talks about starting her journey because she wanted to train a Golem, and I can’t lie and say I wouldn’t like a Sabrina. There’s a lot of high hopes and I am absolutely setting myself up for disappointment.
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3 moments between the crow couples during their time at hogwarts
1. an unknown part of wylan and jesper’s somewhat disastrous amortentia story comes moments after jesper pulled wylan in for a kiss by his tie, causing the rest of their classmates to erupt in cheers and applause so loud that professor snape’s “boys! in the hall, now!” went unheard. minutes later, when they had actually been led out of the classroom to wait for their punishment, wylan finally worked up the courage to meet jesper’s eyes, his face almost as red as his hair. jesper’s grin was radiant. “so. butterbeer and my cologne, huh?”
it took all of wylan’s nerve to not sink into the ground where he stood. “i didn’t know today’s lesson was on amortentia,” he muttered, feeling himself flush again.
it took all of jesper’s will not to kiss the younger again right there where he stood with the way the redhead was looking up at him from beneath his long lashes.
“well, what about you?” wylan demanded, rolling his eyes. “let me guess. cards, pumpkin juice, and galleons?”
“no, actually.” jesper replied, spinning his wand in his hand. “i smell grass. gunpowder. and...”
he took a step closer to wylan who stood still, holding his breath. “...and?” the third year asked quietly.
“exploding elixir.”
wylan’s mind shut down.
“the entire room was filled with the same smell from that day we singed snape’s hair,” jesper snorted. “of all things, we had to mess up the potion that smelled like burnt-”
it was wylan who pulled jesper down this time, reaching up on his tippy toes to meet jesper’s soft lips, the ones that had captivated him from the moment he had walked into the potions classroom and saw his new lab partner for the first time.
“fahey, van eck!” snape burst into the hallway. “does it seem possible to keep your hands off of each other?”
“sorry, prof.” jesper winked, eyes still trained on wylan’s mouth. “guess you can say we’ve got...chemistry.”
wylan couldn’t even bring himself to care about detention.
2. nina stifled a laugh, trying to keep a straight face as she watched matthias scan the inside of zonko’s joke shop. she had just gotten matthias to admit that he enjoyed a drink as sweet as butterbeer, hours earlier at the three broomsticks. “you look like you’re inside the shrieking shack, not a joke shop.” nina snickered at the way matthias perked up.
“whatever the shrieking shack is, i think that there’d be more dignity in such a place than...this.” matthias dropped a dungbomb he had picked up like it had personally offended his grandmother.
“why?” nina giggled. she shook the box in her hand. “not a fan of ton-tongue toffees?”
matthias made a face that looked like he was more than just not a fan. “if it’s anything like those jelly beans you fed me on the train, then no.”
that only made nina laugh harder. “i swear you picked the worst ones! you should’ve seen your face when you tried the rotten egg flavor.”
matthias cracked a smile, relaxing a little amongst the colorful store and his girlfriend’s laughter. he picked up another product, a pink bottle corked at the top. “what does this one do?”
nina lowered her voice, gesturing for matthias to come closer, as if letting him in on a secret. “that one’s a love potion. one drop of it in someone’s drink and they’re yours,” she whispered. “they’ll think about you all day.”
matthias jerked away, putting the bottle back on the shelf. “you can’t be serious. love can’t be made like that!” he sputtered.
“i don’t know, durmstrang,” nina teased. “what if i bought one and slipped some in your pumpkin juice tomorrow at breakfast?”
matthias only crossed his arms, continuing to grimace. “well, that wouldn’t work at all.”
“why not? zonko’s is pretty reliable when it comes to their products.” she said pointedly, looking at the extendable ears on sale.
“because i’m already in love with you.” matthias stated simply.
nina froze, turning to her boyfriend. during her time dating matthias, the hufflepuff had proven to be narrow minded and straightforward as a broom doing any and every thing. it was moments like these she was reminded that this included during his expressions of affection, and nina couldn’t love him more for it.
“i’m in love with you, too.” she declared, slipping her hand into her boyfriend’s. she had always liked...brooms. “now, come on. i want to see if we can get kaz to fall for a trick wand.”
3. all inej had wanted was a quiet place to study that wasn’t the library. she liked to practice with her wand for transfiguration, and magic wasn’t allowed in the library. she had been wandering the school for an empty classroom or quiet corner when the room of requirement had appeared at the end of a hallway, exactly moments before she was about to give up and return to the gryffindor common room. she was only half surprised when she opened the door and saw kaz, but like always, kaz hadn’t seemed surprised at all when she entered. he sat on top of a desk with his cane leaned against it, wand out, in the middle of a silent spell. inej let her eyes trail over his robe perched on a chair, his gloves off and set aside in a rare moment, and his uniform sleeves pulled up to his elbows.
“first time here?” kaz asked, not looking up from the book in his lap. his rough voice echoed slightly in the large room as inej scanned her surroundings. the room was empty besides a couple of desks and chairs in one corner, a cluttered pile of objects in another, and a big wardrobe that looked ages old. a fireplace on the wall kept the room warm, and a small chandelier hung above inej’s head.
“guess i didn’t require much until now.” inej shrugged, pulling a desk and chair of her own towards the center of the room. “you?”
kaz closed his book, finally looking up at inej. “i come and go when i want.”
inej wanted to know more about what had revealed the room to kaz in the first place, but she redirected the question away from kaz himself, knowing it was unlikely he would answer. “get anything out of it?” with kaz, it was all about gain.
kaz drummed his fingers on his desk. inej tried not to stare. “some crying first years with who miss their mums. i think i’ve witnessed a bit of every couple in the school’s snogging.” he pulled out a handful of extendable ears from his robe pocket. “snape’s planning something. don’t know the details yet, but something big.”
inej nodded. part of her expected kaz to leave, speak with his silence as he tended to do, but he continued to sit and look at inej, book in lap. inej knew him well enough to recognize that while it wasn’t exactly an invitation, kaz wasn’t saying no to a conversation. she could’ve started with a less risky question about snape’s plans, or asked for the names of the couples in their year, just to know, but inej was curious about other things.
“and how did you find this place, kaz?”
“the de kappel painting.” he said casually. “i needed a place to hide it.”
inej froze, taken aback by kaz’s answer. or more accurately, his willingness to answer. “so it’s true?” she questioned, hoping her voice didn’t give away her surprise. “the gringotts vault rumor.” she had half believed them to begin with, knowing kaz’s abilities but never his motives. still, kaz had never confirmed it with anyone as far as she had known.
“true enough.” kaz reopened his book, attention back on the page. inej inwardly sighed. the satisfaction of knowing kaz trusted her enough to confirm the gringotts rumor didn’t last long. figures kaz wouldn’t want to talk much about himself.
“but that’s a story for next time.” kaz flipped a page, the slightest start of a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth.
next time, inej turned over in her head. she tried not to smile as she opened her own book. she could work with next time.
author’s note (pls read!) this is my first time on tumblr so idk how to use it too well but i’m overwhelmed by all the nice responses so thank you all so, so much. i see everything!! idk if there’s like poll mechanisms and stuff on tumblr (argh help) but i wanted to gauge what everyone would like next—im deciding between six of crows x pjo or shadow and bone x harry potter, so comment below what you’d like to see first (: i’d also love to hear abt any personal requests so my dms (is that what they’re called here?) are open for suggestions. no promises, but lmk if there’s something you want to read. feel free to get as niche as you want, respectfully! ok ik this is super long god bless your soul if u actually read the entire thing but finally, i just wanted to introduce myself—i’m lynn, this is my library and i dabble in most fandoms! my goal is to get at least one piece of writing out every month, so if you’d like to read what i write, follow along! OK im finally done, i swear. thank you again for the tremendous support. unbelievable. happy reading!
#kaz brekker#grishaverse#reading#six of crows#shadow and bone#netflix shadow and bone#lynnxsixofcrows#inej ghafa#soc inej#wylan van eck#wylan van sunshine#wesper#helnik#nina zenik#matthias helvar#jesper fahey#kanej#crooked kingdom#hogwarts#harrypotterau#harry potter#kaz brekker with sleeves pulled up someone draw it pls#everyone’s a cute moment with kissing or confessions and kanej is just oh there’s gonna be a next time#HEAR YOU KNOW YOUR WAY AROUND A CAULDRON SET
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