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#smth for me to work on in the future ig
caterpisser · 2 months
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Kind of an art request but could you draw Billy batson with a cat ears head band? 👁️〰️👁️
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yes mr shazam
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byanyan · 10 months
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i want to like... create a proper timeline of events of byan's life, but man... that sounds like a lot of work
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ragingtwilight · 1 year
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Guys i love my pfp but i wanna change it to smth cotl im torn warafdjhdhndbd
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jarvis-cockhead · 11 months
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i dont rlly have a big following here at all but i do appreciate anyone who interacts with my stuff immensely and suddenly felt the need to say it. ive been going through some stuffTM and its been a whole ass time and im still reeling tbh. it has been a hell of a time but tumblr still feels like such a cozy comfy place .. i forever long to connect more with people here but never know how. anyway idk where this post is going but haii hi im still here forever just a little funny in the head rn :3
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drunkhee · 2 months
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in my memory ────── ⵌ YJW
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pairing: yang jungwon x afab!reader genre: hurt, angst wc: ~580 warning !! HEAVY emphasis on angst, death
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synopsis; you are infront of yours and jungwon's family recounting your favourite memories
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today was the day.
a day that joined your family and jungwon's. the crowd begins to settle down as the tune to his favourite song plays. people scurried around, finding a seat. many of which just occupy any they could find free, asking others to scoot over the pew.
you took a deep breath before entering the scene. you have been observing them from a small room that was tucked away at the very back of the church. you fix your white dress as your father smiles at you weakly before walking down the aisle with him.
each step felt heavy as you approached jungwon. you were definitely not dreaming, you tell yourself as your father holds onto you nearing your beloved. as he guided you up the steps, your father places a soft kiss onto your hand as you make your way next to the man you loved ever so much.
as the priest went over scripture and readings, your hand reaches into your dress' pockets. your little speech that you have prepared to say in front of both families. the priest hands over the mic to you, as you look at the crowd.
'hello, everyone. friends and family of myself, and jungwon.' you smiled at the crowd who watched you intently.
'now, i have always dreamed of reading you this note that i wrote, from the third year of me and jungwon's relationship. it was a dream that i get to fulfil today, but as life is full of surprises... i never,' you hiccup at the end, breathing in deeply before continuing. 'i... i never thought that i would be reading this out to our families in a funeral.' your hand was now shaking as you look back at your lover encased in a casket.
'i loved, no. i love jungwon. and i knew that he was the man i wanted to marry since the very first time i met him. he wasn't the man of my dreams at the time - rather he was just a quiet boy i found to be charming.' you look at his mother who was wiping away tears.
'you have done a fine job of raising your son mr. and mrs. yang. thank you for giving me the chance to love your son and be loved by him. jungwon has greatly changed and influenced many around him, and we will never forget that.'
‘jungwon had been my rock. i’m sure now he’s probably screaming at me telling me that he still is my rock, and that he is.’ you gain a few chuckles from the crowd as you continue your speech. ‘he has been there through my toughest and i know it wasn’t his intention to make me feel this way, or any of you for that matter. i know that he is simply going to be watching over all of us, like he had always been.’
‘to my lover, my fiancé, my best friend in the whole world – rest easy. maybe this wasn’t our life time, maybe in an alternate universe we are happy with our two beautiful daughters called luna and areum. but this is what I face now. a future without the man I call mine. a future with no you. if you are listening, i love you jungwon. and that will never change.’ as you finish you felt a gust of wind enter through the open windows, pushing one of the balloons closer to you.
‘that must’ve been him.’
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vi's thoughts
welp uhh this came to me in a dream and uhh it may have been based off a funeral i've been to idrk its smth i dont rlly like to think abt BUT ig that experience helped me write this ig. hope ure all doing great :)
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(c) drunkhee 2024. pls don't steal/plagiarise my work ! lmk if you wanna be in my taglist!
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thatdeadaquarius · 1 year
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OKAY OKAY SAGAU BUT THE CREATOR IS A HUGE KPOP FAN LIKE IMAGINE THE MOST STOTIC CHARACTERS DANCING TO TWICE
ANON I HAVE SEEN UR ASK SITTIN IN MY MAILBOX AND BEEN WAITIN FOR THIS ONE-
GOD IM SO BASIC ANON I ONLY KNOW LIKE 2 SONGS BY TWICE (LIKE "FEELS" OR SMTH POPULAR), I KNOW A LITTLE MORE ITZY, BUT MY MAIN'S JUST BEEN BTS SINCE 2019😭
(send me recs pleassseeee ;-;)
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Hey this'll be the last time I use colored words for characters!
I think it's a bit too distracting, and the only reason I was using them was to let ppl know if their fav was in there, but now I'll probably just use CW/TW to mention character heavy asks/fics :)
Thanks for being patient with me for so long if ur still reading my stuff :0 <3
Listen as you read?
EDIT 1/1/24: Hey I expanded more about this on my Eldritch Fanfic Part 2 post, but unfortunately I did a form of exoticism by including the term "Huangdi" inappropiately here. I have since replaced it with "Emperor" as was the original untranslated term I would've used. I'm genuinely sorry that I did this, and will absolutely be on the look out/do better in the future. I hope you can understand.
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AGONIZED OVER THE GIFS THIS TIME THEYRE SO PRETTY AND I WANTED TO GET THEM DANCING ONE OF THEIR CUTER ERA/THEMES ALL DRESSED UP TOO-
also im so sorry?? Idky i was in such a scenario mood today??? Ig im in my exectutive dysfunction paralysis state so maybe that’s why, like it unconcoiusly wants me to waste more time not catching up on uni work??? anyway, hope u like this chaotic addon 😭
or i just love this ask sm, that’s entirely possible too <3
I JUST NEED YOU TO KNOW I PUT ON A MEGA TWICE PLAYIST WHILE WRITING THIS ENTIRE THING LMAO
ok but they’d totally heard ur music tastes thru the screen right?
like just imagine-
the video game music is normalized, and to them its just another one of those “all kinds of magic in teyvat” causing the music, like the seelies wandering around all the time or elemental energy
Jean is flipping through a folder filled with the reports for the week, she’s got to get the routes ready for the week, then there’s the liyue shipments the knights need to help escort over, then checking in on any of the emergency stations/rations throughout Mondstadt for weary or hurt travelers/merchants-
She sighs, and yet another irritated thought is thrown Varka’s way in her mind, she can’t even muster the energy to make it outright dislike she’s so tired…
Jean was so concentrated she just now is starting to hear the Favonious Headquarter’s music once more, it’s peppy upbeat tune… grates like nails on a chalkboard.
and if she has to hear that damn flute for the next hour she works, she’s going to start banging her head onto her desk.
Out in Jueyun Karst, Xiao is dealing the finishing blow to a flying ruin hunter
He’s huffing and stabs his spear into the ground to lean on and catch his breath, the gentle music of the peaks begins to float around him once more
The Yaksha feels the earth beneath his feet shake. Not like from his Lord, not the other adepti angered, but an enemy so large it’s stomps shake the ground he stands on
Xiao quickly straightens less he fall over, pulling his spear out of the dirt with a little more effort than it probably should’ve taken…
The high sounds of the guzheng trickle through the air, a perfect representation of the base of the slopes, trees, streams, and nature all around him
Xiao turns to face the enemy behind him, his arm popping with tired joints,
…A ruin grader, two ruin hunters, and finally regular three ruin guards, follows it. they come around the corner of the bottom of another slope, and they're still simmering with black smoke, curling off their metallic shoulders.
Xiao sees several red targets layer over his chest,
the music fades a little, but sticks around, plucking strings gently. Xiao sighs, exhausted already.
Kazuha and Beidou had to redirect the Alcor from a nasty storm at sea that intercepted their usual route between Inazuma and Liyue,
the storm had practically chased them further and further down form the Inazuman islands
it wasn’t until Kazuha, from the crow’s nest, spotted fog on the waters that they realized they’d be forced to go into said creepy fog, what with the crackling looming clouds at their backs pinning them in
“Not good Captain, the fog is miles long, I’m not sure I can see a way around it…” Kazuha calls down to the deck, Beidou letting out a sharp sigh through her nose
“Damn… fucker’s not even sentient and it practically backed us into a corner, feels like we literally gotta escape the damn thing… BRACE YOURSELVES CREW, WE’RE HEADING INTO THAT FOG!”
The Alcor makes it’s way into the fog, a piano swells with a strange tune…
Beidou, Kazuha, and the crew know to listen to the music of teyvat, especially if you have a life at sea, where storms can appear in the middle of the day or other pirates could attack any moment.
The music means nothing good, but at least Kazuha can see the storm staying at the border of the fog, moving no further in, unlike themselves
“Shit… see anything up there Kazu?” the Captain steering the ship doesn’t even reach a shout, for the music has creeped out all conversation on board
“No ma’am, wait,” a chill breeze brushes through the wanderer’s white hair, he feels goosebumps jump on his neck and spine,
“…Yes! Portside Captain, land, no enemy movement yet!”
“Alright, here goes a bad idea…” Beidou’s arms flex as she easily turns the heavy wooden wheel, steering left,
the Alcor gently comes ashore, and they make anchor.
…there are no enemies, like Kazuha said, but the tune worsens, it had gotten louder now that they’re actually on the theme’s land
It plays slowly, encasing the crew of the Alcor in a paranoid quiet, and it almost has a melancholy note
Crows caw and fly off of a stone gate up ahead, they can see flickers of a strange blue light further inland, like figures carrying lanterns everywhere they go…
“Damn music, I wouldn’t feel half this anxious if it didn’t sound like we were walking into a monster infested cave…” the first mate says, the first person to break the quiet the music held over them.
“Yes, while we might need to stay here for awhile, I think we’re all very aware how dangerous this is…” Kazuha agrees, crossing his arms and squinting at the moving blue lights… the piano plays on.
You open on Spotify on your computer, clicking on your favorite kpop playlist, it’s been rainy all day, so you need the peppiness of this dance playlist to actually not be half-asleep playing Genshin-
You hum along to the Korean lyrics as you boot Genshin up, ugh, ur in-game music is so loud, u forgot u turned it up last time to hear the new Sumeru music…
Turning it down, you let the Kpop songs fill ur headphones as you nod to the beat, your team materializing on screen. Right, off to do commissions first!
Jean is like.. seconds away letting out a scream of frustration, anger, tiredness, loneliness, etc. her hands clenching her hair and ruining her ponytail when, thank Creator, the theme quiets down finally.
The loss of her immediate ire gone, she lets go of her hair, her hands just kind of hovering midair, not knowing what to do with herself, all the negative emotions giving her face wrinkles just melt off, leaving her stunned, blank face behind
🎶 Dalkomhan chocolate ice-cream-cheoreom Nogabeorineun jigeum nae gibun so lovely! Kkamkkamhan uju sok gajang banjjagineun Jeo byeol jeo byeol geu yeope keun ne byeol 🎶
Acting Grand Master Jean actually screams when abruptly a song in an unrecognizable foreign language, blasts into her office, around it, filling the entire Favonius Headquarters with its… cheeriness??
Jean lets her hands fall onto the desk, still in shock
..well, she quickly decides she’s grateful for the new music either Barbatos or the All-Parent had heard her pleas for…
…actually, it’s kind of,, catchy?
Jean takes out her ponytail, massaging her aching scalp, huh, she really did have it tight she’s just now noticing, she feels a small smiles appear on her face,
she actually kind of wants to do something now (she kind of hopes this new foreign bard song sticks around..)
If you asked Xiao what happened in that battle he’d be hard pressed to tell you,
without going completely red in the face. LMAO
He probably wouldn’t tell the other adepti this, especially Cloud Retainer, but Xiao had definitely had to get used to fighting brutal battles to the sound of gentle summer day-esque music
Right as the aruguably, army of ruin machines spotted the Yaksha, he’d launched himself into the air to try and evade the rusted beasts, aiming his jade spear, adding winds to swirl around the staff to better boost his attack, the machines warm up, their targets moved and locked onto him midair, right as both sides launch their attack-
🎶 Geogi neo I fancy you! Amuna wonhaji anha Hey, I love you (Love ya!) 🎶
Xiao nearly falls out of the air.
Quickly recovering, he uses his anemo power to propel himself off to the side dodging, he swears to his Lord and his Emperor himself, delayed attacks, as if the machines were caught off guard too,
missiles whiz by him, exploding behind, the peppy song of foreign women’s voices sings out into Jueyun Karst bright and happy-
🎶 Geurae neo I fancy you! Kkumcheoreom haengbokhaedo dwae 'Cause I need you! (What?) 🎶
Xiao’s face goes from being confused to concentrated throughout the rest of the battle, and the worst part… it actually helps his energy levels.
and he finds himself nodding along
Kazuha takes the lead, his sword unsheathed and at the ready to cut down the slightest movement before it can get to any of the crew behind him,
He’s flanked by the Captain of the Alcor herself, Beidou’s electro shield emitting a deep hum as it blocks in front of both himself, and the crew behind him
all of the pirates have unsheather their own weapons, daggers, swords, claymores, bows, their all on high alert, waiting for.. well, any enemies at all.
In fact, Kazuha hopes he sees hilichurls soon, just for the familiarity it could give him and the his crew-
the music begins to fade away.
The crew stops just shy of the entryway that was perched with crows before they scattered, the white fog hasn’t moved beyond its lazy drifting, but the creeping sounds have stopped entirely. Not good.
Captain Beidou sighs after a few silent moments, other than the quiet breathing and shuffling of weapons from the Alcor crew.
She lets her claymore sword thunk against her shoulder, and just as she opens her mouth, turning to address the all, deciding camping here will have to do for the night-
🎶Fancy! youu, ooh Nuga meonjeo johahamyeon eottae Fancy! youu, ooh Jigeum neoegero gallae Fancy! ooh!🎶
Kazuha’s shoulder shoot up to his ears in a flinch, red eyes wide, he barely stops his reflexes from taking a hard swing with his sword, several crewmembers shriek, collide with metal clinks into one another, Beidou drops low, her sword swinging off her shoulder into almost a full swing at the ground-
…..
……..
🎶 Dalkomhan chocolate ice-cream-cheoreom Nogabeorineun jigeum nae gibun so lovely! Kkamkkamhan uju sok gajang banjjagineun Jeo byeol jeo byeol geu yeope keun ne byeol 🎶
the music plays on, the only one making any noise as the entire Alcor crew just, stop. after their initial shock.
Kazuha’s the first to break.
He desperately tries to contain a quiet chuckle, which turns into a giggle, which turns into a full-on wheeze, as he buries his sword into the ground to brace himself on it and one of his knees
the Captain cracks by the time Kazuha wheezes, her laughter going straight to guffaws and knee slapping, her claymore shaking the ground where she stabs it to lean against
the crew erupts into laughter, both as the peppy foreign song echoes into the mysterious fog, and Beidou’s ridiculous laugh, as always
they don’t recover until two songs later when there’s finally a slow kpop song, Kazuha’s had to sit down, tears streaming down his face, Beidou’s half-dead, wheezing out complaints about her stomach, as the crew keep sending each other into more and more laughter right as they think they’re done.
They decide their Akitsu Mikami must have the best sense of humor and must just be sitting on their celestial throne pranking some of their subjects from time to time, and the Alcor crew find themselves all the more appreciative for it, their nerves entirely gone about the island
Kazuha and Beidou are constantly asking other bards they meet to try and see if anyone can recreate the song for the crew sometime they liked the beat and the memory so much, Fancy by Twice will still get a laugh out of Beidou and Kazuha, and they’d quickly let you in on the inside joke so you’d be a part of it too (afterall you did it lol)
NOW MORE IMPORTANTLY, BC IDK IVE BEEN ON A SCENARIO KICK LATELY?? SORRY IDK WHY U GUYS KEEP GETTING SCENARIOS-
There’s only TWO 2 CATEGORIES THAT MATTER HERE-
Who’s DANCING!! w/o u needing to do anything but play the music:
NILOU (she got those choreos done in like, an hour flat everytime u teach her, shes always begging for “just one more dance lesson Greatest Lord? 🥺”),
YUNJIN (difference betweeen the two dancers is that nilou asks :) → yunjin lowkey demands, she like always gets u into a situation where you have plenty of time to teach her and feel obligated, u just got gaslight gatekeep girlbossed into teaching her another kpop dance LMAO), they also see it as they’re (literally) god-given job to dance better than any idol you’ve seen do it before, esp when they recruit groups of other dancers to join for group choreos
Yoimiya! cutie #1, CHILDE, amber, eula, ITTO, bennett,
Collei (but shes shy u gotta encourage her),
Diona (cutie #2),
FISCHL (would form an actual group to dance all the choreos like a real kpop group),
Gorou (shy #2, needs encouragement),
Kazuha (tbh I think he’d have fun and be weirdly good at it, fem or masc dances),
Ayaka (shy #3, needs encouragement and would rather die than dance in front of ppl other than you),
KLEE CUTIE #3, NAHIDA CUTIE #4,
Qiqi (but u gotta teach her slow bc she needs to memorize it, and also it takes her a bit to write down the dance steps in her journal so she doesn’t forget as much),
Razor (another person i think would just have fun with it! also he’d do it but it would be very, aggressive? like making finger hearts but violently shoving his arm out at ur face lmao),
HEIZOU (shutup he’d actually be good at it and brag- and flirt at you-),
Aether (shy #4), VENTI, xingqiu, xinyan, KAVEH
BARBARA (she literally stalks u around Mondstadt all like “oh hello your highness! just happened to walk by you and was wondering if you heard any new of those “kpop” dances, you know I’d LOVE to show it off at my next show-!” like she hasnt been a block behind you the entire day 💀)
WHO YOU MANAGED TO CONVINCE TO DANCE LMAO-
babygirl Wanderer (he literally surveyed the area before he finally let u teach him any moves, and refused to any sort of dramatic moves, like fem or masc),
Alhaitham (but only like a small part of a guy group choreo like a bit from God’s Menu or smth, he was too lazy to do anymore even for u lol),
Cyno (dammit some of these bitches look way too good doing even girl group dances-),
Diluc (u got him to do like, a pose. LMAO and he saw Kaeya in the distance and quit immediately LMFAO),
Kaeya (but it didnt take much convincing, if anything it just took forever to teach him, he’s talented in footwork for swordfighting but apparantly not dancing, at least not modern dances he tripped so much ur convinced he did it on purpose at one point so he’d fall into your arms again lol),
Ganyu (super shy, wont do it around anyone but you, and maybe Shenhe),
speaking of Shenhe (she just took awhile to teach bc she wanted to stay upright a lot, kinda stiff),
Keqing (once again, another who’d only dance when it’s just u two lol),
Yae Miko (she just wanted to learn the whole choreo that’s what took so long… and now she’s making comments like “My goodness, my god wants me to dance for them? They’ll even show me how? Oh, now I must do it perfectly so I can satisfy you, my Kami.” STOP TAKING THINGS OUT OF CONTEXT UR TEACHING EVERYONE-),
Ayato (he’s acts so theater gay he refuses to do anything but the girl group dances/fem dances lol),
SARA (easy, give her ur strongest, saddest pout and she cracked like glass, u got her to do a whole dance with u/she actually got into it too, its her secret guilty pleasure now lol),
Kuki (did one sort of move then got BARRELED OVER by Itto’s crazied boy group acrobatics he likes so much, u know the backflips over each other type of ones? yeah. ),
Ei (the god herself/not the puppet, catch her never doing that lol, she tried but didnt, get it? she’s also pretty stiff, but she looks like she’s having fun so u just keep teaching her moves, and she likes that its you teaching her something new),
Thoma (shy #5 ? idek what number we’re on anymore lol),
TIGHNARI (u nag that bitch so hard he nearly throws a drink at you to get u to stop bothering him- NO he does NOT think those dances would suit his ears- dammit he wont do that dance, no matter how much he likes you- DAMMIT MY LORD-),
Xiao (if u thought nagging Tighnari was hard, this is like nightmare mode, not only does he not wanna do the dances, but he also wants to understand WHY u want him to dance each and every move- !! bc he would “look cute or cool”?!?!!?!!! …yeah he’s gone, he went so red u cant even get him back with tofu),
Zhongli (would like, be so confused on how to make his body do that, that he ended up just sort of posing, at least he looks cool)
(anyone not on these 2, u did, in fact, not manage to convince, yes, even if their god asked them to, nor are they doing it of their own volition lol)
WHAT THE HELLLLLLL-
THIS IS SO LONGGG IM SO SORRRYYYYY
ANYWAY HOPE SOMEBODY LIKED THIS, DW ILL STOP THE WEIRD SCENARIOS AFTER THIS ASK I JUST GOT IN A PHASE I DONT KNOW WHY
also, im like, three weeks away form graduating uni? NICE, soon i will be free to assault u all with responses mwhahahaha (rubs my little gremlin hands together)
Safe travels,
💀 ♒
♡the beloveds♡
@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk
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rebouks · 7 months
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Hello! I'm that anon who once asked you about the lots you use in your gameplay and whether you built them all. I'm so impressed that you create most of them yourself! But ever since you replied to that question, I've been trying to envision a lot for one of my upcoming gameplays, but I'm struggling to fully see it in my mind, so I was wondering if you'd mind giving some tips on your process of building your lots. Building is my weakest skill in the game, but I want to give it a try!
hello again anon!! i'm very flattered u think it's impressive 🥺 i truly love creating spaces for these guys! i'll try my best to kinda go into my process but be warned.. like anything else i do it's pretty much just chaos/winging it dkjsdkj (it'd be much easier if i used floorplans or smth simple so i could be like, here do this! but alas...)
okay i'm prolly gonna ramble a lot here but i mostly base my builds off random visions/future scenes that pop into my head or straight up vibes.. which isn't very helpful ik but hopefully if i explain it'll make a bit more sense!
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so with Oscar's house above i knew i wanted it to be BIG, but i didn't want it to feel like a mansion they couldn't afford so i added some other houses on the lot and just gave em the biggest plot! i also knew i wanted it to be symmetrical, but only from the outside cos i wanted it to feel slightly chaotic on the inside, also hence the random tower addition on the left and the sunroom on the right.. like it used to be a big grand symmetrical "mansion" (prolly at the time it was built) but over the years kinda ended up as a convoluted mess left to rot until someone rescued it (yay for Oscar's impulsivity 🤸‍♀️) AND IT NEEDED AN ATTIC!! u kno cos where else would Clementine live?? 👻
so really i had no inspo pics or house plan layouts to go off here, just a vibe and an idea, i started with a rough shape and worked out all the kinks from there, then added the other lots.. be prepared to hate your wip and start over tho cos ig it's all part of the fun!
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here we have an actual wip to use as an example! so with this one i basically knew i wanted a wrap around style house around a "courtyard" but since mt. komo is shit and doesn't have any decent sized lots we'll have to go with an L-shaped design and a third floor ig 😩 i started with the ground floor and just pissed around with the others until i ended up with smth just right, like anything else i do, building is just ruminating on an idea until i'm like.. yeah that works sdkjskj.. also handy to place the bare minimum furniture items as u go to get a feel of how the space does or doesn't work so u can fix it n stuff!
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also feel free to make shit look strange if it works, for example these window placements look weird as hell on the outside, but real life houses aren't always symmetrical or perfect on the outside and we spend most of our time on the inside where the windows make perfect sense so.. yeah! i'm big on views from the INSIDE of the house so i just make stuff work, also big fan of using ivy/wall decs n stuff to "fix" the way it might look on the outside if needs be too..
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the school i made for Robin n' co. was entirely built around this pool (cos it's IMPORTANT) and the fact that it had to have a glass roof (it just HAD to ok idk why but we must kneel to the vision when it strikes 🧎‍♀️) i tried to make the rest of it make sense around it tho, like maybe it was added on afterward so the rest is a pretty standard shape with offices n shit near the entrances etc.. ALSO (wait i actually need to explain smth else before we get to this also BUT BEAR WITH ME!)
ask yourself some questions (if u want? or just dl a house idk dskjdk)
i treat building similarly to writing and that means asking yourself some questions.. like you might ask why a character is doing/saying something, what happened in the past to make them this way? what're they aiming for in the future to choose these paths etc etc.. WELL.. what's this building for, who is it for, who chose to live here, who got stuck here, why do they like it, why do they hate it, etc etc.
we either get stuck somewhere we hate and it doesn't suit us, or we're lucky enough to choose somewhere that we love, but why? Oscar's house is sprawling and chaotic because they kinda are, and it suits them! all the random cupboards leading nowhere and the quirky additions are just perfect for them, if they were real people looking for a real house they'd view it and LOVE it, but other characters definitely would NOT 😅 the wip is neat and practical cos the people who're gonna live there are! 👀 and the school (see we got to that ALSO eventually) has that huge "grand" courtyard at the front that's actually pretty useless because it's a shitty comprehensive school that wants to give the image that it's decent, but actually it's a bit shit and there's nothing going on in the back, nowhere for the kids to play outside and very limited resources/equipment for them either.. like everything is built the way it is for a reason, which is why i think i find it so impossible to use other ppls builds, cos they don't fit all these visions in my mind...
ok i'm gonna shut up now but i HOPE this rambling mess somewhat explains how i go about starting a build and why.. i'm not sure i can help with the vision part since your brain is your own but floorplan websites and things like pinterest or even just google images are great for giving you ideas if you're struggling!
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bitchlessdino · 1 year
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3K Follower StayCation!!!
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Happy summer everyone! I hit my 3k mile sometime ago and was so caught up w my personal projects I’ve been doing and irl things but beginning of July to the 14th 0:00 cst I will be taking on requests and answering Q&A!!! While it is still hot out I'd love to interact more with you guys for this milestone and I thank you all that have joined me up until now. I still have many requests I need to get to if I'm being honest, but i will working those along with these new requests. Many of my posts will be queued and as I've mention, requests will be accepted until the 14th of July. Please follow the guidelines I have on my navigation pinned on my page. Afterwards I'll be on actual vacation! Hence staycation for now! I'll be away at my home country for roughly a month with limited internet and requests I haven't finished or gotten to will be handled after then. I will try my best to complete as many until then. My asks will include but not be limited to the following:
Drabbles/one-shots at a 3k max word count (if you provide details it would help that it stays at a paragraph and please be clear what genre you would like angst, fluff, smut, or all the above💕) please do not be offended if some fics are longer than others, creative processes and products will all come with varying results
Most to least requests (ex: MTL to walk around naked at home 🤷🏻‍♀️)
Playlist requests (give me a song and member and I’ll write a drabble OR you can ask me to give me a number and I’ll shuffle that many times in my liked songs and write smth based on that!)
My innermost secrets (including smut thoughts Ig lol)
Questions regarding previous fics and new fics (including sneak peaks)
Besides these, other ways to support me is my KOFI! You can always send a request or special note there and I'll happily shout you out. If you haven't already done this and would like to be tagged on future posts, please click on this link for my taglist. I am so excited to get started on there. Thank you again everyone! No words can explain how grateful I am for such a big community. Seeing everyone enjoy what put I put out into the hellscape here is such a delight. Now that my working period has ended, I have a lot more time my favorite things done. So everyone sit back, drink responsibly--preferably in nice weather--and enjoy as i put out more content for you guys.
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rose1021 · 10 months
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I know you did not ask and you can ignore if you like but whenever I see Garroth’s Betrayal Sucks I feel contractually obligated to speak on what I make it in my head because I hate that pat so fucking much and of it wasnt so intrinsically tied to the time skip I would burn it to the ground
I make it an Aphmau’s Fault Too thing. Garroth being the loyal guard he is tells Aphmau about someone trying to indoctrinate him and Aphmau just says. “We can use this.” and so a double cross plot is born but Aphmau never pulls the plug even as it gets more and more apparent they cannot make this work because everything has always worked out for her before even when she goes against peoples advice, and despite Garroth insisting they should stop he doesn’t disobey his lord, until it’s already too late of course.
That solves the “Well why wasn’t any blame placed onto Garroth?” issue as well as really adds to and clears up Aphmau’s desperation to bring him home.
It also makes Aphmau missing her children’s childhoods and her village crumbling partially her own fault, the consequences do not fit the crime but to me when it’s something that big and Aphmau being such a “Makes things happen” character it should be her own fault in some way.
(this also of course breaks Garroth’s trust in Aphmau, because he thought they were friends but she ignored every concern and let him be sworn into the Jury of Nine, an establishment she knows he detests)
No thank you for bringing this up! I completely didn’t think about it that way (probably the Laurmau bias 😰) but I definitely see that this works a whole lot better than the shithole that part is, especially the part where Garroth asks about the pendant and,, (I literally paused for a whole minute I forgot what happened) ok so I may be wrong but originally aphmau refused to tell Garroth about the pendants location however after the war she finally tells him that laurance has is. Considering she knew Garroth wasn’t himself and Ofc later finding out that Garroth immediately went and stole the pendant, that would definitely point guilt onto aphmau, also like girl he’s been “sick” and been looked after by a random stranger who walks in also was it cadenza who told Lillian abt Garroth istg first Zane about laurance now this ANYWAYS especially when tensions are high in the village and there is a traitor would you not hold slightly more concern?? I hate this part can we just idk make up a different reason they go to the Irene dimension 😭. Anyways I’m not 100% abt the indoctrination however there is absolutely mistrust between Garroth and aphmau which is completely their own faults in different ways, ultimately I think it’s Zane’s fault, and if I could completely remove that part I would but alas we have to fix everything in this series.
TLDR I think in my very future rewrite the betrayal arc will turn into a oh no he’s manipulated and under a spell arc (smth like that ig) basically keep the good (needed) parts (the time skip and relic absorption) and ditch the bad (the complete butcher of Garroth)
Tempted to write out Aaron but I guess he needs to be in to get Garroth out 🙄 or we can use aphmaus Irene powers or smth
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petrichoraline · 6 months
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We Are Ep.2 thoughts in chronological order
what peem did in the car trying to convince phum to part their ways is what the youth calls ✨a yap sesh✨ (he tried ig) (this is what this post is as well)
we're probably never seeing phum use those things he bought ever, he'll just keep hanging around in his engineer shirt
peem has so many ppl ready to square up for him including his auntie and he is recognised by tan as someone who loves his friends very much (which makes the fact tan has sold him away for time with his crush TWICE even worse lmao)
i don't really get phum's insistence on not telling anyone about being phum's "slave", not even tan who got him into the mess or his best friend but it's just his ego ig (aside from plot reasons)
i find pun more relatable now - tags along for the funsies and gets happy around fire
not convinced the beans and pork scene wasn't an ad but im not sure how cause i didn't clock any labels
the scene where peem brings in food and laughs with q feels like improv or breaking left in lol
fai missing cause of upset stomach might be some sort of foreshadowing and i'm a bit worried bout her
the professor is handsome <3 and could pas off as chimon's sibling in a show
q absorbing those noodles was very satisfying idek why lol
peem and q's friendship is in the background but the show still constantly makes it a point that they are really good and loyal best friends
i thought "oh theyre gonna make the sharing food a thing in the future" so when boys showed up i was like "ah, we're doing it immediately? bit boring" but then he didn't share!! joey never shares food!! i think he will in the future though, him being a foodie is a constant thing so i'm guessing we're using it as a sign of compromise in the name of love or smth
satang playing this type of character felt a bit much in the first episode but i think he's getting more comfortable with the role as the show progresses and it look more natural; i'm glad his character isn't the googly eyed mentee and he actually teases a lot and snaps back but knows when to stop playing because q isn't the most patient person. (matt having to jump in like "bro he's serious" was so funny cause i hadn't clocked that either hahah)
the way we can see q flustered at certain points but seemingly unbothered at others is fun because his reactions aren't entirely predictable at this stage as we're still getting to know him. also it's mad cute when he clearly doesn't know what to do with himself
idk how he hasn't asked toey bout why he's in art yet, ig they're just now starting to properly get to know each other
toey took one look at q's back and decided "that's a cool ass aura to base my entire future around!" and tbh that's very young adult of him
q regularly asking about peem's work being submitted, he's honestyly worried <3
the way i cheered for peem burping in phum's face and then went "oh he came back :(" bahah
phum is definitely already planning his day and schedule around peem, i don't think he'd ever tell his friends because he wants to actually keep it going so one of the reasons is to not run into his faculty friends including tan and the second is to have lunch with his unconscious crush AND I AM VERY HAPPY WITH THIS STUPIDITY
thought peem could overhear the convo behind the car and realise what he was exchanged for but nope, he just dipped; i think that might be a plot point for later
phum not knowing tan has a crush on fang is so weird cause he genuinely acted like he knew while taunting tan, i don't have an explanation for that
fang is their p'!! i was so conviced he was the little brother, ig because of his big round eyes and the way phum acted all protective (that just makes phum cuter tbh)
what is the age difference between bar owner and prof cause i ship it
it took me a bit to realise the nongs were there instead of the full arts gang and i was glad to see toey and q together (also the green sweater is beautiful on toey, hope it makes a comeback)
i was ready to believe fang had some sort of falling out with tan with the way he treated him but tan beaming and enjoying a dreadful setting (no talking, awkward sitting around in a bar with mid music and alcohol) shows that man is glowing just from being in fang's presence (i hope he reaches ridiculous levels of lame for him)
i was screeching when i realised where things were going with wasted peem and seeing him n the bench outside had me exctaticcc (ofc he didnt book a taxi. and ofc they cant just order one for him noww could they)
phum cockblocks but he kinda has to cause there's no reason for fang to be there otherwise; once the ridiculous proposition of him taking peem home comes up he doesn't really fight it at all - he wants to be with peem, sure, but i think he's also pretty okay with tan and fang being a thing
the way i was screaming "just buy the flowers rich boy!!! he wants to go home" and then the kid went to get more lol
ofc he couldnt just leave the flowers in the backseat, peem just has to have them in his lap.. and the seatbelt scene was so predictable but it's too much of a classic with all "figuring things out" parts of a romance that i can't complain
it makes absolutely zero sense aside from people liking people (cause fang knows what he's doing too) that phum would drive peem to his house - a place where tan has sleepovers at all the time and phum hasn't been to before. fang is his brother and they can sleep at the same place as well even if they don't live together but nope. also THAT CAR HAS EMPTY BACKSEATS, if phum wanted to he would've forced them to ride with him to keep an eye on tan
fang is probably planning to launch a big revenge attack on peem and that'd be so funny, those four can get way too entangled, i could get DRAMA out of their plans and schemes (this show is more hidden agenda than hidden agenda was)
tan's energy with fang reminds me of the duracell bunny lmao it's late at night and they've had a few drinks but his mind and body are all focusedon wooing fang (who is playing nonchalant but has probably had a crush on tan as well)
also no way he was just gonna leave tan on the street lol
toey and q aleady work so well together, toey knows his effect on q more or less and q doesn't shy away from being at least a bit vulnerable as of rn; i think they can be one of the best if not the best couple if they have a proper storyline; im certainly enjoying it the more than i thought i would
the fake blush on both toey and peem is ridiculous esp up close but ig they're cartoonishly drnk anyways
auntie took note and now doesn't do facemasks at night, otherwise it would've been an amazing first meeting
"he likes to whine" and she's the one who can't leave the room from complaining sm lol auntie is so cute
ahh, the mandatory "a look around the room shows me you're truly passionate about what you do and you're deeper than i thought" scene..thankfully he didn't mutter "you like painting this much, huh" to nobody cause i was ready to yell HES AN ARTS MAJOR like he kicked you in the balls for a reason doofus
theyre giving us so many closeups of these two and i keep thinking "this is so drama/y im embarrassed" but i have no shame, if it's fun it's fun (and it's pondphuwin, youre not gonna hear me complain about looking at pond's face for too long or from too close)
reaching out to touch his face was a bold choice thoughh i lost it
man down badd man down baddd he was called an asshole and started gleaming like a light bulb
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scrunkalicious · 2 months
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Bleeehhhh thing for smth that happened earlier
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SORRY IM GOIMG TO BE YAPPING UGH KINDA VENT IG
Ok so I'm Asian yeah (if u didn't know....vro be fr 😭😭) but I was never a honorz student. This was mainly a problem when I was in middle school and that affected my self esteem and self image a lot, bc aaaallll the Asianz would be in honorz,,, and like,,,, the only onez that weren't were genuinely some of the worst ppl I've met 😭😭😭 and then I wasn't in honorz,, even tho I was smart!!!! I won't say I was a dumbass or whatever, yes I know I was smart, but not in honorz. So that just kinda made me feel like all my straight A's were for nothing ngl,,,, BUT THEN I ESCAPED MIDDLE SCHOOL SO THATZ BETTER IG...
but now the problem moved into my own house 😭😭😭 my parentz won't beat me if I get a bad grade as long as I'm trying so itz not that they're chill,,, ITZ MY BROTHER
Don't get me wrong I love lil bro,,,, hez 3 yearz younger than me, and out of me and my 2 siblingz, he is the one thatz an honorz student (my lil sister is still in elementary soooo). Hez incredibly smart!!!! Academicz and all that shit,,,, hez good at math and coding and allll that stuff
My dad has an engineering job so he is very proud of my brother!!! And I am too!!!!!! But he alwayz talkz to him abt stuff abt jobz and whatever and it just kinda makez me upset bc no one rlly does that w me in the family bc im just sitting here drawing shit,,,,,
And today at lunch my brother was flexing abt how he was taking free online drawing classez and how he could work for Pixar and that upset me bc,,,, now hez taking the artist position in my family, along w every other talent he has????
Idk that just fuckinf upset me bc he alwayz talkz abt his future job and career and college AND HE JUST ESCAPED ELEMENTARY SCHOOL,,,, and I'm the one in highschool and I can't figure shit out I'm just sitting here drawing fuckinf ship art 😭😭
So idk fam I don't fw this shi
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rottentiger-art · 1 year
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Love how the fandom basically agrees we are only watching for Loagn x Quinn and not damn Zoey 😂
hahaha yes, I'd say 90% of people will do the same.
It's not surprising, I know many of us rewatch season 4 just because of them. They really outshined the protagonist and main ship, and hope the producers don't forget than and give us a decent amount of content from them.
Why I think that is, the reason the audience lean more to Logan and Quinn or Quogan than Zoey and Choey, it's because both L and Q character's developed very well season through season. I mentioned before that I hated Logan on season 1, but he became a favorite mid season 2. Quinn was always always a favorite of mine, but she also got her development and it made me love her more. The same could be said about their relationship, they gradually moved from enemies to frenemies to friends to lovers, it was a beautifully paced thing and then we also got to see how they acted as a couple, and it was surprisingly healthy! the actors also had mad chemistry, they sold the love story very well.
Zoey and Choey however...
I disliked Zoey from season 1, I thought she would get better in the future but for me she got worse. She was very self centered and annoying and the show tried very hard to make us believe everyone loved her and she was an amazing person, but she just wasn't. I don't think she was a good friend, she wasn't a bad person, but she just,,, idk how to explain it. When I started rewatching I hoped I liked this time around, I thought "oh maybe it was just internalized misogyny or smth", but nah, I disliked her again (same for S1 Logan, god what a little jerk), she just showed no development either, and I think it was bc the writers didn't think she needed it, I think they thought she was perfect like that.
And she had no chemistry with Chase, not even with James. Zoey just wasn't charismatic for me, didn't have that charm to make her a loved character (this is all my opinion btw, it's okay if you disagree and do like her), I ended up liking any other character before her (even Logan who I hated, I think that says a lot), I ended up wishing any of the characters took over as the protagonist or got a spin off (I would absolutely watch a quogan or michael spin off, episodes about them were always the funniest. I would've even watched a Chase on england spin off. I can't fault JLS' acting bc she was just a kid ig (even tho her co-stars made an amazing job at selling a character), I mostly blame the writers.
And i wasn't like with Tori Vega, were it's understable to dislike her on the first season, but after the writers worked in making her likeable and then if you still hate her that's just on you. They never worked on making Zoey better.
And as for Choey, I think they played the will they-won't they game too long, and people got tired.
sorry this turned into an anti zoey rant lol, I really don't wanna be beefing with a fictional teen lol. But like, yea, I think that's the reason why nearly no one is watching because of Zoey/Choey.
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enlighten3d · 1 year
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OKAY. MY THOUGHTS ON MUTANT MAYHEM:
its amazing.
(spoilers for tmnt mutant mayhem!!!!!)
this is all going to be very incoherent and in all caps
SO I FUCKING LOVE IT. ITS NOT MY FAVOURITE (thats rise, i owe my soul to rise), BUT.
gods its so amazing
their first time meeting april! ITS VERY SIMILAR TO THE WAY THEY MEET APRIL IN 2012 BUT WITH LEO BEING THE SIMP EXCEPT HES NOT AS CREEPY ABOUT IT????
and oh my gods, april literally said the word 'sus' in the movie. SEVERAL TIMES. WHY. ASHFBSK WHY IS THAT SO FUNNY TO ME HOLY SHIT. AND DONNIE LITERALLY TOLD LEO THAT HE HAS NO RIZZ. USING THE WORD RIZZ.
leo is. in the words of my good friend, @sp-teri, "leo is cringefail". i love leo so much. donnies my favourite, but. leo is wonderful. HE DOESNT KNOW WHAT HES DOING AND HAS LITERALLY NO RIZZ (donnie described it perfectly) HES AMAZING
and oH MY GODS. SUPERFLY?? SUPERFLY IS COOL. VERY COOL. HES KINDA LIKE DRAXUM BUT ALSO NOT???????
how is superflys plan even supposed to WORK. i mean, he wants to turn all animals into mutants and kill humans. HOW DOES THE OOZE (i love that its called ooze in this. ooze rights.) DIFFERENTIATE BETWEEN ANIMALS AND HUMANS????? HUMANS ARE ANIMALS TOO...
idk, ill chalk it up to movie logic, i guess.
AND BRO. DONNIE. MUTANT MAYHEM DONNIE IS AMAZING.
HES A KPOP STAN. im so proud of him.
AND THE ENTIREEEEE MOVIE HINGES ON THE FACT THAT DONNIE RLY RLY RLY LIKES ATTACK ON TITAN. THEY WON BECAUSE OF ATTACK ON TITAN. GO FOR THE NECK!!!!!!! AND IT WORKS. I AM. IM GOING INSANE ABT THAT.
AND DONNIE HIMSELF. HES MY FAVOURITE. I LOVE HIM. HES SO SASSY AND AMAZING AND HE HAS SO MUCH PERSONALITY AND. i stan every version of donnie (...even 2012 donnie...) BUT MM!DONNIE? HES MY SECOND-FAVOURITE (once again, my soul belongs to rise).
donnie is. hes so cool Ɛ>
i literally dont have words.
and i love mm!april so much. IM SO PROUD OF HER. SHES A CONSPIRACY THEORIST AND WE STAN IT. AND SHE OVERCAME HER FEAR OF CAMERAS IN THE END!!! SHES A REAL REPORTER!!!!! APRILLLLLL O'NEILLLLLL
and oh, oh! that weird boss lady that wants to milk the turtles (every damn time they said that they were gonna milk the turtles, i was. that shits hilarious. "they/we dont even have nipples!")! my theory, with basically no evidence to it, is that SHES A KRAANG OR SMTH. IDK. i mean, she mentioned utroms????
OH MAN THE SHREDDER APPEARING AT THE END THO??? CHILLS. CHIIIILLLLSSSS
and omg the turtles get to go to school. im so happy for them. THEY GET TO BE TEENAGERS! i do not approve of them taking their masks off, but pop off ig LMAO.
AND THE. THE ARTSTYLE OF THE MOVIE. AGH. SO FUCKING PRETTY. I LOVED ALL THE EXPLOSIONS AND SCRIBBLES AND -
oh my gods the fuckin childishly drawn scene near the beginning where theyre dreaming about their 'impossible' future is. IT COMES TRUE!!!! almost. BECAUSE THE CHILDISHLY DRAWN VERSIONS OF THEM HAD SIXPACKS, ABHAHAHEBRBDJGJKE THAT IS SO FUCKING FUNNY TO ME-
Back to the art! it was all so... 3d... which is a bit of a redundant statement, considering that i watched the movie in 3d, BUT. it was so... lively ! they were all so animated (pun intentional)!! its such a UNIQUE artstyle and is so amazing and wonderful Ɛ>Ɛ>Ɛ>
im. i dont draw so i cant rly properly marvel at the wondrousness of the art, BUT AS SOMEONE WHO KNOWS NOTHING ABOUT ART??? ITS SO FUCKING PRETTY AND BEAUTIFUL!!!!!
oh and all the little connections and references and parallels to the other iterations of tmnt!!! their goofy-ass belts w their initials, splinter being like... was it 2003 splinter that was originally a rat instead of a human? OH the movie also kinda reminded me of bay tmnt in some ways! cant rly explain it... but there are connections to all the other shows and movies and its so cool ... (not pointing out any rise or 2012 connections because theyre just so INHERENT??? mm is, in a way, kinda like if rise were 2012. BUT ALSO NOT. BECAUSE ITS A SEPARATE THING. but its one way to describe it.)
but also, quickly going back to aprileo thing, i dont. im not into it. leo, i support your rights and wrongs, TRUST ME I DO, but. idk abt this one, man... i rly hope they dont make aprileo properly canon and april just rejects leo. tbf im not big on romance in general, but i rly do think of the turtles and april as being family. aprileo is just odd. BUT I AM VERY GOOD AY IGNORING ROMANCE SO. hopefully i wont have to do that tho.
SPEAKING OF ROMANCE. THE FUCKING SPLINTER X THAT ONE COCKROACH MUTANT? THAts KINDA DISGUSTING BUT ALSO FUCKING HILARIOUS. never thought id see a rat and a cockroach making out be animated in a movie. that cockroach is splinters cockroach friend back when he was just a rat, wasnt she... SHE DIDNT DIE AFTER GETTING RUN OVER BY A SCOOTER!!! accurate to real life cockroaches lmaooo
and the climax of the movie!! i cant believe leos 'we can do it' speech worked. like. POP OFF, but. raph is right, only time leo was ever cool Ɛ> /aff
and the ending of the movie,,, THEY GET TO GO TO SCHOOOLLL!!! WITH APRILLLLLLLL (O'NEILLLLL)!!!!!!
mikey gets to join the improv comedy club.... im unashamed to say that i legit laughed at his 'australian nike is crikey' joke LMAO. its. im laughing just thinking about it. dont. dont question me, i love bad jokes sm
mikey looks like a watermelon Ɛ>
watermelon guy... but fr, mikey is v pog tooooo!! i dont particularly have much to say about him,, i didnt pay much attention to him honestly, but hes still VERY COOL
and raph is cool too!!! i just didnt pay much attention to him either qhdhjd
OH. EVERYBODY LISTEN TO ME: MIKEY AND RAPH ARE TWINS. FUCKING FIGHT ME. WERE IGNORING THE FACT THAT THEYRE ALL THE SAME AGE. MIKEY AND RAPH ARE TWINS. THEYRE GOOFY TOGETHER.
i love them all so much holy shit.
i love this movie so much.
its so amazing.
its so pretty.
the plot is so goofy.
i cant wait for the tv show.
Ɛ>Ɛ>Ɛ>Ɛ>Ɛ>Ɛ>Ɛ>Ɛ>Ɛ>Ɛ>
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xxbl00ds0akeds3raxx · 9 months
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Dear Seraphina
Don't worry, me and my husband have already made up, and he has proven how much more careful he wil be on the internet talking to strangers.... He very throughly demonstrated he how will be much more receptive of my input ;-)
As for the Kylar problem... I will leave you to think, however I do think he is crossing your boundaries with what you are comfortable with. I know you have multiple partners aside from Kylar, and I don't see him being very approving of them, which already probes you are not on the same foot.... This won't be good for your future if it isn't addressed, but it seems to me he is probe to overwhelming you and dominating you in conversations...As I said, you are clever and skillful on your feet... You are like that even if Kylar is in your life or not, yes?
I won't stress you further with this anymore... for now.
-Camille M.
OMMGG... winky face xDD...?? hehehe cami u r a woman close 2 my own morals </3 whutever works 2 get it in their skulls yk xD
ty, ur concerns r appreciated n listened 2 ig but im glad ur stepping back a bit bcoz tbh im tired of running in circlez ^^' ya ofc there r thingz he doesn't approve of but he's mature enough 2 b patient and either deal w/ it bc he loves me or work w/ me 2 make it better.
we r addressing issues as they come up. he's allowed 2 be upset abt me hiding thingz from him bcoz thats a bitchy thing 2 do. if he trusts me,, tha least i can do is not lie 2 him :/
yes, i'm like that whether he's in my life or not. and i can totally speak up 4 myself if he does smth im uncomfy w/.
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bunnihearted · 1 month
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⃝ .. 📓 ‧₊˚ 🦢
trying really hard but i cant lie, this hurts like so much actually.... for so many reasons. i didnt only 'lose' the future i wanted and the love i wanted to invest in, but also one of my only two 'safe persons'. which i lost my first one too. and that just stings and hurts x100 worse. esp since i used to believe no one but my mom would ever be a 'safe person' (an avpd thing). i wouldve been like so incredibly lucky if the person i was in love with was also a safe person to me, then smth like a relationship would actually be possible.. but idk maybe it could be possible without that too, just more work ig? but yeah i didnt only lose all that and am not only heartbroken bc someone i truly wanted to be with and love, wont be within my reach anymore. but also.. simply losing a safe person is painful in of itself.
but yeahh. trying really trying bc reality is reality but every single day it all just hurts so much. other ppl might think im insane and maybe nobody gets it, i feel like nobody gets it, but it simply just does hurt. a lot. maybe i just think and feel and operate on different wave lengths than most ppl, but this really did mean so fkn much to me. it was something real and true to me. i could imagine and envision it so vividly i could taste it, and i have never wanted anything more than that. i wouldve and wanted to do everything.... anything.... i dont know i just dont know. bc it was smth so big for me even in the beginning, and the fact that i could even message him every single day.. multiple times a day.. for 3 months.. ppl dont get it but that is like impossible for me. during a week or two i might be able to reply once a day, but mostly im like wow it's been 3 weeks and i havent replied. and yeah thats shitty and i hate that abt myself, but it has to do with my avpd and i have no fkn idea what to do abt it. when i was in school i texted my friends every single day after school and during the night no problem. now thats so hard to me. so the fact that i could do that with him bc i wanted it so bad is a big thing for me in of itself. and i couldve kept going, i wasnt the one who stopped which i always am.. and like this is from my pov, im not one to be mad or upset that someone takes time to reply. i get it. i did get it and i was sad that we didnt talk every day anymore and i felt like i was harrassing him if i wouldve kept saying gm and gn every single day, so i didnt and i wanted to give space and not suffocate... but every single day i wanted to spend every single second with him. im scared that im actually crazy lol...
so... its wild to me to think of but i really couldve just kept going and i wanted to but its not only up to me. i wanted more more more but smth .. i feel like i tried to talk abt certain topics but explained them so clumsily that it got missunderstood and then smth shifted and ... a wall? idk. i dont know. i think and think and think even if theres nothing to do to change the past. but i still go over it obsessively... i wanted more wanted to keep going wanted to evolve it it couldve evolved but then it just stopped and i scrambled to get it back onto the train tracks but idk. i just do not know. what i can know is that from me, i, wanted to keep it going, keep it rolling, until it wouldve naturally ended up in the destination i could see, could taste, wanted. knew and felt it would end up in. thats what i know. i dont know more tho...
i also know that it hurts so bad and im trying to not mind it but like ohmyfuckinggod?????????????? what is wrong with my brain? what is wrong with me????? what normal person does this........
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okwonyo · 4 months
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斑比!!! so uhhh, i maybe kinda sorta did smth i've wanted to do for a while.... i opened up my own blog 🤭 its @rixkisunghalo (riki from enha and sungho from boynextdoor isn't my word play so clever😝) idkkk ik i only became one of ur anons recently, but i've actually been on ur blog for a while now, so ig seeing ur works helped motivate me to do this... ahhh i feel so shy now 😭
-☁️
毕 晓辉 !! >0< that’s so cool ~ i’m proud of you keke if you love sungho and riki, i have an user saved for them .. it’s ‘ghokis’ :0 but your word play is indeed really clever huhuhu i’m honered that my works motivated you to do this >< i hope we can motivate each other in the future keke n don’t be shy~ i don’t bite ^^
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