#silly billies i want to eat them both

[this-isnt-oish]

chimera tet n snake neru interaction :3

first meeting

[cakypa120]

Unhinged promo of my Silly Billy where he just forgot that he is the Champion of Magic, and by that, he CAN do magic, so he just use the most unhinged spell Infront of the league, like, absorbing light to eat, but in the most cartoony style.

What are your thoughts Father of the Captain Marvel cult?

I like this idea

Billy often forgets that he is the Champion of fucking magic. Not just a magician, but the Champion himself. That means he can do magic in any shape or size. But when Billy remembers that he can do magic, the League has a field day.

Barry: Cap, where'd you get so much salami and cheese?

Marvel: I did.

Barry: What?

Marvel: *gestures at the sun, which was just peeking out from behind the Earth* Look.

Marvel claps his hands and says this spell that Buddhist monks made up a long time ago. Barry watches in shock as the sunbeams begin to warp and turn into pie.

Barry: Wow. That's incredible.

Marvel: I thought so too.

Marvel starts shuffling the salami and cheese around like poker cards, then Marvel flips them and they land in a neat pile on the bread. The sandwich is bigger than Marvel himself!

Marvel: Ta-da! Want to try it?

Barry: Sorry, dude, but I can't fit this.

Marvel: Your loss.

Marvel throws his giant sandwich up to the ceiling and opens his mouth wide. The sandwich falls into Marvel's mouth and the hero eats it all! Barry looks at Marvel in shock as he strokes his big belly.

Hal: We're about to crash into the fucking planet!

Batman: I'm doing the best I can, Lantern!

Marvel: I have an idea! Batman, don't try to avoid the planet!

Bruce wanted to yell at Marvel, but he looked so convincing. So Bruce stopped trying to lift the ship. The planet's surface was coming in fast and furiously.

Hal: Marvel! You better do what you're planning!

Marvel nods and starts whispering. Then Captain leans on the control panel and blows a kiss. Bruce and Hal look at him in shock.

Suddenly, their ship slowly stops and flies back into orbit around the planet. Bruce and Hal see a woman's face appear on the planet. You can even see the blush of embarrassment!! The planet winks and blows a kiss with its lips. Marvel winks with a mischievous smile and waves.

Marvel: *whispers* Batman, you better hurry, the planet's seduction spell won't last long.

Bruce comes to his senses and takes the ship away from this damn planet. In his nightmares, he later dreams of this planet flirting with Captain Marvel.

Villain: Ha-ha-ha, that's the end of you!!

Marvel: No! *raises both hands* Brown magic!!

Villain: *turns pale and quickly leaves, for some reason with a very straight back*

Superman: Marvel, what have you done.

Marvel: Brown magic.

Superman: Yeah, I heard, but what does it do.

Marvel: Brown. Magic.

Diana: Marvel, why did you cast that spell on Arthur?

Arthur: Poop! Poop! Poop!

Marvel: Sorry, I got the words in the spell wrong. I promise it won't happen again.

Arthur: Poop! Poop!

Hal:*almost dies laughing* Arthur, what is not allowed to do in the sea?

Arthur: Poop!!

Hal:*laughs so hard his stomach hurts*

Barry:*lies on the floor making hoarse sounds*

[amomentsescape]

Yay request are back! I loved your yandere slasher sleepwalking one shot so may I request another sleepwalking reader scenario?

But instead of sleep escaping they just roam around like a drunk saying cute things like about how much they love them and silly things like how the strawberries are so obnoxious always saying they're the best fruit while the reader is just sitting in the fridge and random stuff like that?

And the Slasher just finds it aboustly adorble and fondly giggle at their antics while lovingly guiding them to bed?

😴😴😴🤤🤤🤤🥰🥰🥰

Slashers with Funny Sleepwalking! Reader

Slashers x Reader (Separate)

Includes: Freddy, Michael, Jason, Thomas, Bubba, Brahms, Norman, Billy, Stu, Vincent, & Bo

A/N: It's been a long time coming. I'm so sorry for the wait on this, and on anyone else's requests still sitting in my inbox. This was a joy to write though, so thank you!

Freddy Krueger

Who needs TV when Freddy has you?

You aren't really able to fully sleep in his world, so he comes to you most nights

He just flops into your still warm spot in bed and watches you stumble around the room

"Freeeedddy! I love you!" you coo over and over

And every time, he replies with a chuckle and an "I love you too"

You giggle and just stumble around some more, bumping into the same wall multiple times

When you finally come back to bed, you just fall right on top of him, not even noticing he's there

Michael Myers

You've woken up a few times in the morning to sore lips

(He duct taped them shut throughout the night)

He's not really home most of the time anyways, so it doesn't really matter

But when he is, the last thing he wants to deal with is you laughing and practically screaming at any object you bump into

He's quite literally locked you in the bedroom some nights so he doesn't have to hear your incessant babbling

"Michael, why is there glue on my cheek?"

He'll just shrug and walk off, tossing a broken glue stick in the trash

In his defense, the glue was nontoxic

Jason Voorhees

He loves to hear your random laughs and nonsensical talk of hysteria

You've grabbed onto his arm multiple times, using all of your strength to pull him outside to go on an "adventure"

"But, Jason! There's strawberry unicorns and feather fields out there!"

He honestly isn't sure if he should be laughing or feeling actively concerned for your wild sense of imagination

He always guides you lovingly back to bed while you have the cutest pout on your lips

"But it's time to explore!"

He just kisses your head and places the blanket back around you

It only takes a few seconds for you to fall peacefully back asleep again

Thomas Hewitt

You're going to make this man go into cardiac arrest

You're sleep talking is adorable, of course

But what isn't adorable is how you think each one of his carving knives is a toy doll

"This one is so pretty! What should we name her?" you asked all giddy

Thomas's smile turns to one of horror as he watches you swing his freshly sharpened butcher's knife around like it was flying

"Weeee!" you squealed happily, only to drop the knife two inches from your foot

Thomas about died

Since then, he makes it a point to lock you both in the bedroom each night

He'll happily indulge in your fantasy like dreams from there

Bubba Sawyer

He literally sets an alarm so he can see what made up conversation you're going to have each night

He'll follow you around, giggling with you about whatever you have to say

"And then I told him to go away cuz why would he say that my favorite fruit isn't his favorite fruit? Who does that? Oh, and then he went and..."

And Bubba just holds your hand and hums along with you as if he's listening

He has no idea what you're talking about most of the time, but hearing your sleepy voice is just so heartwarming, he can't help it

You always wonder why you wake up in the morning sounding like a dying frog

Brahms Heelshire

Oh, Brahms eats it up

You're constantly on a rampage going on and on about how much you love him and how much you need him

And this is exactly what he wants to hear

The moment he feels you stir in the middle of the night, he rolls over and holds you tight, making sure your sleeping actions don't cause you to leave the room

"Is there anything on your mind?" he asks softly

The moment you hear his voice, a big goofy grin spreads across your face

"Oh, Brahms! I love you soooo much. I wish I could just be here with you forever!"

Do you even know what you're saying? Of course not

But Brahms will do everything he can to believe it

Norman Bates

Norman is certainly guilty of staying up too late reading some new novel that has him engrossed

You've almost scared him a few times when he turns to look at you only to be met with your open eyes and droopy smile

"I like the bagels that jam," you say sweetly

Norman just looks at you in a confused smile

"Sure you do, honey"

You just smile and flop your head onto his arm

"Jam jam bagel. Jam jam bagel," you whisper-sing

Norman just chuckles quietly and goes back to his book, letting you continue your random sleepy talk

Billy Loomis

Billy just wakes up with a groan each time

"Babe, please just go to sleep"

"But the caterpillars! They're hiding..." you say, rolling all over the place

He replies with his usual grunt and rolls over, flopping right on top of you

"They're gone now! How did you do that?" you exclaim

He puts his hand over your mouth

"We do this every night," he mumbles into your neck

He's just met with a snore as you've already passed back out

"I don't know how I put up with you," he says with a slight chuckle

Stu Macher

He wakes up to the sound of yelling and fast thumping coming from the living room below

He all but trips on his way downstairs, worried something was wrong

Except he is simply met with you running around in a blanket, yelling about incoherent nonsense

"The snakes! The berries! The fridge!" followed by an immediate laugh

Stu stands there for a bit before finally chasing after you, swooping you up into his arms

"No! They got me! I'll never surrender!" you yell at the top of your lungs

"And I thought I was the loud one," he laughs, carrying your wiggling frame back upstairs to bed

Vincent Sinclair

He wakes up in the middle of the night to a soft voice singing

This would honestly be terrifying in any other context

But since this is almost a nightly occurrence by now, he just responds with a sigh

"Then the fruit tree grows, and the fruit starts to fall, and the-"

Vincent picks you up and tosses you back into bed

"I can fly now!" you yell, kicking your feet

He can't help but smile at your behavior

It might be two in the morning, but seeing you so goofy and free warms Vincent's heart

Just please don't sing so loud anymore, or else Vincent is going to get an earful from Bo the next morning

Bo Sinclair

He can hear you banging around in the kitchen

And he's about to storm out there to complain how it's 3 in the morning, and you shouldn't even be awake right now

But instead, he finds all the food on the floor as you try to wedge yourself inside the fridge

"Lava. There's lava everywhere," you're muttering

"Darlin' what in God's name are you-"

"Bo! You're on fire! Hurry! Hop in!" you yell, trying to make room for him in the cramped fridge

He just lets out a frustrated sigh

"Not tonight, sweetheart."

He quickly picks you and carries you back to the bedroom

"I didn't know you could walk on lava!"

[blackenedsnow]

I have never requested before I hope I'm doing this right. You can feel free to ignore this.

But can I have Billy and stu (separate or together is your choice), Bubba Sawyer, Thomas Hewitt, Micheal Myers (original or Rz are your choice), Jason Voorhees, Norman Bates, and Billy Lenz. You don't have to do all. I don't really care who or how much you do. But them with a reader who takes care of their younger sibling. Kinds like the oldest sibling being a parent of their younger sibling

You can choose the age and gender but I would prefer a male and 4 year old kid but it doesn't matter. I just haven't really seen much of this and would really like more. I love your writing btw. Again you don't really have to do this and I feel like this request is long but just wanted to write it

slashers with a reader who takes care of their younger sibling ; headcanons

WARNING: None

PAIRING: Billy Loomis x Reader, Stu Macher x Reader, Bubba Sawyer x Reader, Thomas Hewitt x Reader, Michael Myers x Reader, Jason Voorhees x Reader, Norman Bates x Reader, Billy Lenz x Reader

NOTE: I’m so glad you love my writing! Your request is perfect, and I really enjoyed putting this together for you. Hope you enjoy!

BILLY LOOMIS

At first, Billy's not sure what to think.

Kids are loud and messy, not really his thing, but he’s intrigued by how seriously you take your role as a caretaker.

He gets protective over both you and your little sibling in his own way.

He doesn’t interact with the child much but will keep an eye on them, especially if things seem off.

Billy admires your strength and responsibility

He didn’t grow up in the best family environment, so seeing you take on that parental role makes him respect you even more.

If you ever need help with your sibling, he’s reluctant but won’t say no.

He’ll watch over your little sibling in his way—just don’t expect him to read bedtime stories.

STU MACHER

Stu doesn't really care for kids, but your little sibling is an exception.

He’s the chaotic big brother type, always joking around, making silly faces, and playing rough

...in a way your sibling enjoys.

He’s surprisingly great at distracting your sibling when you need a break, even if it involves a bit too much sugar or wild games.

Stu admires how you handle your responsibilities, but he’s also the type to encourage you to let loose and have fun with your little sibling.

He'll say something like

"Being a big sibling can be fun too, y'know!"

Sometimes, he’ll get your sibling involved in harmless pranks—nothing too serious, just enough to make you roll your eyes at the bullshit.

BUBBA SAWYER

Bubba has a natural, gentle side that shows around your little sibling.

He’s great with kids because of his own childlike nature and will immediately want to help you out with your sibling.

He’s protective but in a soft, nurturing way.

He’ll help with basic care—making sure your sibling eats, plays safely, and feels comfortable.

Watching you care for your sibling touches something deep in Bubba.

Family is everything to him, and seeing you take on that role makes him feel connected to you on a more emotional level.

Your little sibling will probably love Bubba’s playful, kind-hearted nature, and they’d get along well

Almost like having a second big sibling!

THOMAS HEWITT

Thomas is awkward around your little sibling at first.

He’s not used to kids, and his intimidating presence might scare the child a bit.

Once you show him how to be gentle, though, Thomas is (not surprisingly) good at it.

He’s careful and protective, and though he’s not talkative, his actions speak volumes.

He respects your role as the older sibling and quietly supports you in whatever way he can.

He’ll help carry your sibling, fix things for them, and even craft toys if necessary.

Thomas feels a sense of admiration for how you juggle being a caregiver.

It reminds him of the family dynamic he grew up in, where responsibility was a big part of survival.

MICHAEL MYERS

Michael is eerily silent around your little sibling, but he watches the way you care for them with curiosity.

He doesn’t fully understand the concept of caring for someone, but he’s fascinated by your commitment.

He won’t actively interact with your sibling, and in some strange way, he becomes protective of both you and the child

Like he’s observing a small piece of humanity that he’s long forgotten.

Michael doesn’t interact much with your sibling, but if anyone or anything threatens them, Michael steps in without hesitation.

He’s drawn to your strength as an older sibling.

It doesn’t make him soft, but it earns you a twisted sense of respect in his mind.

JASON VOORHEES

Jason has a soft spot for children due to his own troubled childhood.

When he sees how much you care for your little sibling, it stirs something in him.

He’s fiercely protective, acting as a silent guardian over both you and your sibling.

He doesn’t speak, but his presence is always there, watching to make sure nothing bad happens.

Your little sibling isn’t scared of Jason for long.

Once they see how Jason watches over you, they warm up to him.

Jason might even offer small gestures of kindness, like finding things in the woods for your sibling to play with.

Jason admires your strength and responsibility, seeing you as a protector like himself.

It forms a quiet bond between the three of you.

NORMAN BATES

Norman is gentle and polite around your little sibling, offering to help with anything that might make things easier for you.

He’s fascinated by the idea of family dynamics and your role as both sibling and parental figure.

It reminds him of his relationship with his own mother, in a twisted way.

Norman tries to make things comfortable for your sibling, offering snacks or games to keep them occupied.

He’s surprisingly good at calming your sibling down during tantrums.

However, there’s always a sense of unease around Norman.

His overprotectiveness can feel stifling at times, especially when he becomes too involved in your sibling’s care, as though he sees you as part of his own family.

BILLY LENZ

Billy is unpredictable, and your little sibling might be a bit nervous around him at first.

Billy has strange behavior, but he never intentionally tries to scare your sibling.

He doesn’t understand kids well, but once he realizes how important your sibling is to you, Billy makes an effort to be less creepy around then.

There’s a strange protectiveness that comes over Billy when he sees you caring for your sibling.

It’s almost like he’s trying to impress you by not being chaotic around the child.

He’ll watch your little sibling from a distance, occasionally making weird, quiet noises, but he’ll stay back unless you need help.

If anyone threatens you or your sibling, though, Billy’s unpredictable nature can quickly become dangerous.

[flkwh0re]

Moms Friend

warnings: age gap (reader is 19 and Nat is 39), mommy kink (N), blow job, eating out, fingering, p in v, dirty talk, unprotected sex, breeding kink, cockwarming, a little bit of jealous Nat. That's all!!

Summary: You come home for a bit, and your moms best friend finally makes her move in you.

A/n: This is my first fic i’m posting here!! I apologize if it’s not great!

You had just pulled into the driveway of your childhood home. A few weeks ago you had planned to surprise your mom and come home. Grabbing your bags from the trunk, you walk to the door knocking. You hear your mother shout something incoherent.

"Oh Детка you're home!" Pulling you into a big hug, you catch a glance of your young brothers inside. They see you too running to the door. "Y/n you're home!!" You smile as Billy and Tommy pull you into a big hug.

Vision, your father, steps out into the hall. His smile fades as he sees you. Your relationship with your father is not the greatest, but with your mother it's amazing. Wanda had treated you better than any other mom you could've asked for, her best friend Natasha as well.

It then dawned on you that you haven't seen Natasha in while, so you figured maybe invite her over or ask her if she'd like to plan something. You pulled out your phone, searching for her contact.

After texting her, it was only a matter of time before she answered. You both decided you'd come to her place for lunch while you're mother and father were at work and your brothers at school.

"Y/n honey, tell me how school has been." Wanda asked with a smile. "Just like always, I'm top of most of my classes." You look at her, a proud smile plastered on her face. "Well isn't that just amazing, Vision." She ask him. He returns nothing but a nod, causing a small frown to creep onto your face.

"Oh, mom I'll be having lunch over at Natasha's tomorrow!" You say excitedly. "That's great! She's been asking so much about you, and I just don't know the answer to everything. My girl is a busy girl." She smiled.

Your evening consisted of catching up with your mom, listening to your brothers and all the things you've missed, and your father ignoring that you were even there. You honestly don't know why your mom is still with him, but you know it's probably for the best.

-

The next day arrives soon, and you're on your way to Natasha's house. Your nerves creep. You love Natasha, but there's always been this feeling towards her. A yearning for her. You know you can't act on it, because it's nothing but a silly childhood crush thought something tells you it's more.

You pull into her driveway, the front of her house being decorated with cute fall decor.

Stepping out of your car, the cold air hits your face only making your shivering nervous body worse.

You knock on her door, waiting a few seconds to hear for footsteps. Then you hear them, and Natasha telling you to give her a second. "Y/n!! Gosh I've missed you." She pulls you into a hug, kissing your forehead softly.

She pulls you inside, and quickly helps you remove your coat. Her eagerness to see you makes you smile wide, and laugh. Oh how you've missed her. Nothing or anyone, even your own mother, compares to how Natasha makes you feel.

You catch up with her on everything, while eating the food she prepared. You were interrupted by your friend Kate blowing up your phone with text then a call. "Hold on Nat, let me get this."

"Y/n I am going to hurt you!" She shouts into the phone, "Why the fuck didn't you tell me you were in town!!" You giggle at her, "Hey don't you fucking laugh at me!" Only causing your laughter to worsen.

Natasha on the other hand was not laughing, more jealous that her time was ruined with you. She hated that she got this way, but she couldn't help it. She tried to stop, you're her best friends daughter. You're also 20 years younger than her. Her thoughts were interrupted by your words.

"Sorry Natty, that was Kate. She wants me to come over as soon as possible." Her face like stone as she replies with, "So you're leaving?" Your nerves taking over again, leaving you silent. You don't wanna leave Natasha, you'd stay there forever with her. "Well not now, but probably soon. I'll make it up though, we can have dinner sometime."

-

Soon, the two weeks of being home quickly passed. You still hadn't made it up to Natasha, so you decided you'd show up to her house.

She opens the door, shocked to your arrival. "Y/n what are you here for?" She asked confused. "Well I never made up time lost with you, so I brought a desert and figured I'd spend some time with you and watch a movie or something." She felt a smile creep onto her face.

You settled down quickly on her couch, her following behind. You had both decided on watching (insert wtv movie).

Time had passed fast, she knew if she didn't act then she'd probably loose her chance. "Y/n come here, sit in my lap." You quickly scurry onto her lap, only to be stopped in your tracks when you notice her hard-on. "You feel that baby? It's all for you." She attaches her lips to your neck, kissing softly.

"Nat, what are you doing? We can't do this." You say nervously. "Says who? You're an adult sweetheart."

Within minutes she has you on your knees, pulling down her boxers. Her dick springs out, your face pulling a shocked look at her size. She brings her hand to your face, guiding your mouth into her length. You bob your head up and down on her. Gagging noises and her moans fill the air.

You bring her to her orgasm, swallowing everything she gave you. "Such a good girl for mommy. Now get up on the couch." You follow her orders and she helps you remove your clothes. Her lips attach to your nipple, while her hand gropes at your other breast.

"How's that baby? Is mommy making you feel good?"She asked in a sultry tone. "So good." She smiles at your weaker state, as she kisses down your stomach. Her mouth reaching your core, and her noise brushes your clit causing your hips to jolt. She attached her mouth to your pussy, sucking and licking.

As she works her tongue, she adds her fingers to the mix stretching you out. Your orgasm crashing in, in full speed.

She stands up, then aligns her tip with your entrance pushing in slowly. Once you've adjusted to her size, she shows no mercy on your pussy. "That feel good baby? Mommy's gonna fill you up. My little bitch to breed." You can't even form a sentence in your fucked out state.

"Aww poor thing is too dumb, can't even form a sentence. Tell mommy you want her to fill you up with her babies." You tried to spit the words out, but it just came out as an incoherent mess and moans. "Cmon baby tell me or else I won't." You still didn't speak, not until she pulled out of you. You gasp and quickly spoke out. "Please mommy fill me up!"

She smirked, then thrusted herself back into you. In only a matter of seconds you could feel her cuming inside you. She continued her thrust, your orgasm quickly washing over.

She placed a soft kiss on your head, then pulled herself out of you. Laying down behind you, she slid her cock back into you. "No mommy! I can't-" she quickly shut down your please. "Don't worry baby, I have you. Mommy just wants to be in you." She kisses your shoulder as you drift off to sleep.

[ohmy-gojo]

yuuji and reader being grossly in love with each other ෆ

— you both annoy the shit out of everyone surrounding you, megumi and nobara are the #1 victims

— always clinging to each other, you both have to have some sort of contact. the pdas oml

— feeding each other is a must. youd do this thing where you cross your arms together to feed each other food (this makes your 2 friends gag) or drinking from the same glass with different straws

— ridiculous pet names like nilly billy silly willy (for yuuji) or nutter butter (for you)

— always act like you are in some damn romantic music videos or kdrama. quoting movie lines all the time😭

— so many couple photos. have to try all the couple poses in the world. please spare nobara

— wallpaper, passwords and even social usernames are dedicated to each other and you both wonder how yall get hacked when your pw for everything is literally iloveyuuji69 and ynistheloml

— top commentor on each others post

— matching outfits all time. you both go to public wearing those i love my bf/gf or im his/im hers shirts

— share the same brain cells. one sec you both are climbing trees, eating mangoes and the next sec you do makeup on yuuji or film tiktoks

— speaking of tiktok you both are probably the most popular couple there. theres no couple trend yall havent tried yet. the internet is in love with you both

— writing each other love letters and putting them in yo lockers as if yall arent the only ones to do that😭

— most chaotic couple in jjk high, always pranking other students or even teachers but never each other

— the compliments never stop. you could be doing the most mundane thing and he'd go 'my boo's so talented☹️' and vice versa

— even during missions yall dont stop, yuuji cld do a particularly impressive move and youd be like 'woah thats my baby!!!' and hed go 'aww thank you snuggleboo!!' cue flying kisses. even the curses are dumbfounded

— gojo finds you both really adorable and hes often hyping yall up or joining your shenanigans (megumis worst nightmare someone save him)

— he spends his money on you two. want to go to a concert of your favs? done. a date at disneyland? done. he just wants you both to be happy and live your life fully. in return maybe you could prank nanami-

— the rare times you both arent together (most of the time its missions) are the worst for you both and everyone surrounding you. yuuji goes to sleep crying and holding your photo frame in his chest

— stay up late thinking about starting a band or baby names (when you asked megumi and nobara about starting a band with you both they refused:/ so yall decided to make your babies be your band members in the future)

— even though your friends might act annoyed they are secretly happy for you both

— yall are just really happy and in love with each other :(

note: yes i wasnt supposed to post this but inspo hit while listening to bollywood songs (im bangladeshi btw)

[miyaz6ki]

If it's alright, may I ask for ZZZ Anton, Von Lycaon, and Billy Kid with a rather renowned g/n patissier s/o? Someone is known for having creative dessert concepts, and enjoys presenting it to them to try (Even though Billy cannot Eat.) Thank you very much! :]]

──── wakering steps

𝜗𝜚 synopsis. tasty treats, and its all for him! what? what do you mean you have a business to run?!

𝜗𝜚 pairings. anton, billy kid, & lycaon x gn!reader (seperately)

𝜗𝜚 director's notice. firm believer that these three + wise have sweet teeth (or tooths idk) ALSO SORRY FOR LATE REPLY WHEN I RECEIVED THIS REQ I GOT WRITER'S BLOCKKK

anton who wants to be your taste tester, bad and good treats because anything from you is a gift (even when he's throwing up at the toilet)

jokes aside, but anton definitely would love anything you gave him, especially with all the silly little candy on top of the cake, or the tasty frosting you let him try as he watched you from behind while you decorated a cake for a rich couple's anniversary

anton is very enthusiastic about trying your decorations. oh? they're plastic? *choking*

he's a real sweetheart for everything you make. please give him a slice or two after work is over, he'd really like that. or even just a simple treat.

whenever people come over to the shop while he's there, he's definitely flexing about how your his s/o. get him a shirt with those exact words while he's at it.

anton appreciates you so much. keep feeding him till you're both old and wrinkly :p

billy who loves your cooking. he compliments it, even when you know he can't try them

but i know that billy is someone who loves acts of service & physical touch. you know he can't feel them but you do it anyway. that's sweeter than any cake you've made.

billy falls in love all over again each time you give him hugs from behind, even when he jumps in surprise. you know what will fix it? a cupcake! come on come on! give it here!

he treasures everything you give him, ranging from small treats you let him model for (for advertisement), or the huge cakes he wishes he could taste. billy loves them either way

even if billy can't feel your touch, or experience the chance to eat your delicious pastries.. he really appreciates the thought you put into it, even on his birthdays, you bake him silly little pastries and cakes.

billy will praise your work a lot, he knows how much time, and passion you put into each piece, and knows it'll make whoever eats it happy. that's enough for him to ponder on what it could taste like.

lycaon is willing to help you advertise, he knows everyone will love a tasty pastry with a side of fluff

definitely very good at recommending you to others (him n his connections through victoria housekeeping >_o).

lycaon who loves every flavor you let him try, always asking him if its good or not, even when you know he'll say it's the best.. because it comes from you

lycaon who'll eat even your burnt, or ruined pastries (as long as edible) to make you feel better. stands his ground on him willing to taste anything you make, because nothing else can match the passion you put into your pastries

looks at you so lovingly from behind while you work hard to come up with something unique for next week's special. lycaon will help you come up with names for them if you'd really like, he knows a thing or two that would catch people's eye.

lycaon knows you overwork yourself sometimes, finding you asleep, face beside your newest treat. carries you bridal style to your room- the one you share with him. planting a peck on your forehead.

lycaon praises you for your passion, but is concerned you'll put it over your health one day. a day where he isn't there. very adamant on not letting you work past 5 hours on weekends

lycaon who's really caring for you, n loves you so much !!!!

THIS WAS SO CUTE I SHOULDVE DONE IT EARLIER11!!!

[littlelambscandyland]

hello! I was wondering if your asks were open. If so could I maybe make a request!! It’s for scream (1996)! Like maybe a short prompt or a longer one, or even headcanons! Whatever you prefer of Billy and Stu (or just one if easier) with agere reader? I wouldn’t say forced agere but maybe forced cg if that makes sense? The reader already regresses, but they force their way into caring for reader despite how unwanted it is!! And maybe with masc or GN reader? I’d prefer if it was a bit sillier, until reader finds out about them being ghostface (if you get to that), or it can just be after they know that they both are ghostface! Preferably no diapers and stuff, if possible!! If not that’s okay!!! (˶‾᷄ ⁻̫ ‾᷅˵) just do whatever you wanna do, if you decide to answer this ask. tysm!! sorry for my nervous rambling lol

Hi! I'm so, so sorry it took so long to get to this. My hyperfixations have been kicking my butt and I only just got back into my slashers fixation. I decided to do headcanons and a short story at the end. I hope I do you justice!

Just A Little Forced (Headcanons & Story)

So, let's say for this scenario that you were already a part of their friend group. We can go ahead and assume that this has given both killers plenty of time to study you and learn whatever they need to without stalking too much, even though we all know they still will.

So, let's say they distinctly told you not to come to the party or maybe you regressed and decided not to go, either way you don't go and make it out unscathed. Now let's say that the men got away with all of it, and the next time you see them you're visiting them in the hospital.

After everything calms down you continue to be friends with them. Both seem a bit more intense than before, but you just assume after a traumatic event like that anyone might become a bit more edgy.

Now let's say one of them slips up, most likely Stu, but, oops, turns out they knew about your regression for a really long time. For a second you panic, at least I know I would, and you wonder how they knew or did they think less of you because of it.

Billy is the one to explain it away. Manipulating his words perfectly to make certain situations seem like clear indicators even though they're not. Stu's the one to tell you that they don't think less of you, if anything they think it makes you better!

So, the three of you go on like this for a short time, before the two practically collapse at your feet asking to be your caregivers. Of course, you trust the both of them, they're your best friends, so you say yes.

Good Golly the can of worms you just opened!

If you thought they were intense before you're really in for it now. Billy was protective before, but now he's always hovering and glaring at people. Stu loved getting you and Billy gifts, but now you're no longer given a choice when he sees you looking at something too long.

They're so incredibly sweet in and out of regression. Sometimes, well most times, they will cause you to slip just by acting and talking those certain ways. As much as you try to apologize for slipping when it's "inconvenient" they rebel by coddling you with affection until you forget any guilt.

Stu is amazing at bedtime and playtime. He makes both of them fun and calming. He tucks you in and will read a bedtime story or screw up a lullaby. He really loves anything you want to do, play dress-up, play with dinosaurs, with nerf guns, play video games, or with building blocks, he's your guy. He is also your go-to when sad. He is really good at making you smile/laugh in those moments, not to mention all those silly nicknames he gives you.

Billy is great with mealtimes and calming you down. When it's time to wind down he knows just what to do. He's often the one helping with bath time and making sure Stu doesn't put you in something "too stupid". He is the best at making sure you eat good and get to bed on time. Despite Stu being your go-to when sad if you want some good comfort rather than a distraction Billy is a much better pick, holding you until you're no longer sad.

All in all you're well taken care of for a while. That is until Ghostface comes back. At first you worry about the two and if they may be a target of this copycat, but both men pacify your worries. With their lack of care for this killer you turn to ignore it as well.

Now let's say you were going through one of their rooms. Maybe you lost a stuffie, or a block, or maybe curiosity was just getting the better of you. What you found certainly wasn't what you were looking for. A black and white mask and a bloodstained knife.

After their failed attempt at lying away the items they revert to option two, locking you away. It's not like they can kill you, no, you're their baby, but they can't just let you go either.

It works well for the both of them anyways, they already didn't like you having to leave and do all those "adult" things and now they had a reason to make you stay. Not to mention they can just keep you at Stu's house since the Ghostface killed his parents.

After this they try their best to comfort you. They hate that you're trying to push them away. Not to mention you found everything out while regressed, oh they feel terrible.

Billy practically moves in with you both, but he still has to entertain his father, at least for now. Both men still try to coddle you and occasionally will force their affections on you when you push them away.

Things are much more strained after, but if you can move past the fact that they're serial killers and focus on how good they are at being your caregivers then you'll be as golden as before if not better, now that they don't have to hide that part of themselves anymore.

~~🔪~~~~~~~~~🔪~~~~Story Under Cut~~~~🔪~~~~~~~~~~🔪~~

You ran as fast as you could, stumbling through the halls, and laughing. You made a bet with your Daddy Stu that you could beat him to the bedroom. Of course, not that you knew, Stu let you win, so he and Billy could gather all the snacks for your little movie marathon. It also helped get out some extra energy so they could get you to sleep later.

The two men lingered in the kitchen for a bit longer while you ran to the room. Once in there you jumped on the bed and waited for your daddies to join you. Well, you were going to wait but you accidentally knocked one of your stuffies off the bed. 

You throw your arm down the crack between the wall and the bed that your stuffed friend fell. You search and search for your fluffy friend only to pull out a weird looking magazine, a mask, and finally your friend.

You look at the little hoard you’d gathered from the gap. You found yourself grossed out by the magazine and you already had your stuffed friend wrapped in your arms, so you turned your attention to the black and white mask.

You inspected it closely: the divots and scratches, the stains and the tears. Suddenly you felt increasingly unsafe. Why did this thing have so many red speckles on it? Was it blood? No, no, you Daddies would never do anything bad. It must be fake, for a costume, right? You pushed your hand back down the hole and dug around until your hand hit something hard. You grabbed a hold of it and pulled it out almost easily. Your tiny heart practically stopped when you saw the long blade. Something red clung to the very base of the blade due to poor cleaning. This wasn’t real you thought. 

You went into hysterics crying and hyperventilating as your mind slipped further and further down due to the panic. Whatever big kid part of your brain was still working shut down as you regressed more and more.

Both men were laughing as they entered the room, at least that was until they were made aware of the scene happening right there on Stu’s bed. Stu was quick to spring to action, scooping you up in his arms even as you tried to fight and flail away from him. Billy stood almost statue-like for a moment as he assessed what had made you so distressed, a firmer look grew on his face as he noticed the mask and knife laying out on the bed.

It was like time stopped, and, yet everything moved much too quickly. Billy tried to lie it all away while Stu tried to calm you. Neither worked.

Weeks had passed since the incident, you finding out about their secret hobby. Weeks since they locked you in Stu’s home and didn’t let you leave. Days since you’ve last allowed yourself to relax. Days since you’ve last regressed, not trusting them anymore.

The boys had barely changed. They still acted as loving and as doting as before. The only difference is now you know where their hands have been. You know what they’ve done; what they’re capable of. You’re terrified of them, disgusted, and angry.

You lay here now on the bed of a room they’d decorated just for you. You lay there waiting, knowing they’d be home soon, knowing they would try to make you regress again. You wait because you don’t know if you can fight the regression, not tonight. You need all the time you can get to prepare to remind yourself who those two actually are. Sure, they take care of you, but they’re still murderers.

When they do finally get home Stu calls for you at the door. “Pumpkin! We’re home!”

You can hear the smile in his voice. A part of you wonders what they were doing out there. Were they doing normal everyday things, the child in you wonders if they went to a park or arcade, or were they out doing more terrible things to people?

You listen as their steps get closer. You listen as they open the door. You turn away when they come towards the bed. Tears gather at having to turn away the only people you ever fully trusted.

“Baby, turn back around.” You hear Billy command softly.

“Yeah, c’mon you’re hurting our feelings over here.” Stu chimes in, and you can hear his pout.

You shake your head into the pillow. A shaky breath comes out of you. It’s hard not to regress simply by the way they talk to you.

“Okay then.” Da- Billy says.

You feel the bed dip before you’re pulled roughly into one of their arms. As your heart beats rapidly you’re turned to face him. The second your eyes meet Billy’s you’re pushing him away and crying to be let go.

“Oh, hey, hey! It’s okay. You’re okay!” Stu tries to pacify while he comes over to sit next to Billy.

“No, no! Let me go! Let-” You’re cut off by Billy.

“That’s enough!” He practically hisses.

Your heart drops. He never talks to you like that. Even these past few weeks he hasn’t gotten angry at you. Not until now. You could feel your breathing quicken.

“Look what you did.” Dadd- Stu scolds Billy. “You scared them.” He says rubbing his larger hands down your arms in attempted comfort.

“Don’t coddle them, Stu. They’ve been acting like a brat for over a month now.” Billy argues angrily.

“Jus go away…” You whisper, trying weakly to push either away from you.

It almost hurts, shoving the thoughts and feeling away; the want to be held by them, the need to slip further and further into that child's mindset.

“Oh, come on, angel… You know your daddies just wanna take care of you.” You curl in on yourself as Stu tries again to soothe you.

“We’d never hurt you. We’ve taken care of you so well, haven’t we?” Billy claims while stroking your cheek with his thumb.

Stu leans over and you’re practically pinned between your two caregivers. A part of it was comforting. Like cuddling on the couch, but that wasn’t the situation. Stu sits his head on your shoulder and his eyes meet Billy’s and it’s like they’re talking without saying a thing.

“You know~” Stu starts with a growing smile. “Your daddies bought something for you while we were out.”

Despite yourself, you get excited. The little in you pushing out slowly got incredibly excited at the thought of a gift. Your daddies always got you the best gifts.

Wait, wait, they still aren’t safe… Right?

Stu jumps off the bed and grabs the bag they discarded by the bedroom door. Billy maneuvered you so your back faced him rather than Stu. The taller man finally sits back on the bed holding the bag.

He leans down slightly and whispers with a grin. “Do you want to open it?” 

As much as you wanted to continue to fight, your excitement won, and you nod your head.

“Hear ya go!” He says pushing the bag towards you.

Opening the bag you’re met with something dark green and soft. You grab it lightly and pull it out of the bag. Your excitement grows when you see the face of a T-Rex. You try to hold back the smile and giggle building in your throat.

“Do you wanna see something cool?” Your Daddy Billy asks from behind you.

You nod quickly in response. Without hesitation he presses the dinosaur's foot and the toy comes to life. A loud roar shoots out of it. You can’t hold back any longer and you let a laugh rip through you. 

Both men silently celebrated at your reaction. You press the dino’s foot again and again with a smile. Soon your Daddy Stu takes the toy from your hands and the three of you shift slightly so it’s easier for you to play.

You pause every once in a while, fear creeping in until one of your caregivers pulls you back. Yes, you were trapped and yes you were scared, but you guess it could be worse.

[heart-of-ep]

• Elvis in Hawaii - March 1977 •

I feel inclined to share some fun tidbits and photos of Elvis from his last vacation to Hawaii in 1977 cause he's an absolute baby in these pictures, and I just want to squish him. 🥺❤️

Elvis lounging on the beach, March 4th, 1977 in Honolulu, HI with his fiancé Ginger Alden.

After finishing up his recent tour on February 21st, Elvis would plan a two week vacation to Hawaii for himself and Ginger, which would very quickly expand to include a group of 30 people and amount to a cost of $100,000. They would fly out from Memphis to Honolulu, HI, on the evening of March 3rd.

Alongside Ginger, her sisters Rosemary and Terry would also join the trip. As for Elvis' friends and family, Larry Geller, Dr Nick, Joe Esposito, Shirley Dieu, Billy and Jo Smith, and several others would be among the large group who accompanied him to Hawaii. They would spend the first couple of days at the Hilton Rainbow Tower (now the Hilton Hawaiian Village) before moving to a beach house on the east side of the island in Kailua while the rest stayed at the hotel.

Despite his physical health not being the greatest at this point in time, everyone agreed that Elvis seemed relaxed for the majority of the trip and Larry Geller in particular hoped that Elvis would be able to take full advantage of the new surroundings and take the opportunity to get outdoors, exercise and eat better.

"Health and nurturing are everywhere. The air is clean and aromatic, and the Hawaiian fragrance of pineapples and tropical flowers in the atmosphere has already enveloped all of us. It's so seductive."

If I Can Dream: Elvis' Own Story (by Larry Geller)

While this vacation was a much needed break for Elvis and his friends and family, it was also his first real vacation with his now fiancé Ginger Alden, whom he had proposed to about a month before on January 26th, 1977. He spent much of the trip either lounging with Ginger and her sisters, or he would stay in at their beach house relaxing and reading books during his downtime.

On one occasion at the beach with Ginger and the others in their group, she would have to cut off the sleeves to Elvis' jumpsuit as he was getting overheated in the sun and hadn't packed any short sleeve tops.

"Before long, the rest of the group arrived at the house and Elvis decided he wanted to go to the beach. It was so warm out, we found some scissors and cut off the long sleeves to the jacket of his jogging suit."

Elvis and Ginger (by Ginger Alden)

Both Ginger and Larry noted how Elvis refused to change into shorts or remove his shirt, even when he was on the beach. Ginger suspected it was because of the marks on his back that the rhinestones from his jumpsuit would leave, leaving him a bit self consious, but neither of them were entirely sure the exact reason.

The "customized" jumpsuit that Ginger helped alter for Elvis while on the beach in Kailua.

Throughout her book, Ginger recounts the good times she had with Elvis during this trip and noted how special it was to her. Not only was it a dream vacation for her, but it was also a chance for Elvis to get some much needed rest.

She recalls several instances of Elvis having fun and goofing off with her and her sisters, most of which seemed to be with Rosemary, who shared his similar sense of humor. They would cut up, making jokes about rats and cheese, and Rosemary even challenged him to show off his karate skills, which Elvis did expertly. Ginger would also convince Elvis to play ping-pong with her despite finding the whole game rather silly.

One of my favorite stories from her book is the one that explains this infamous photo of Elvis. For the longest time, I had no idea who he was laying on top of, but Ginger explains:

"Suddenly, I noticed Elvis cut his eyes over at her. Rosemary looked back at him, smiled, then turned her attention elsewhere.

A big grin spread across his face as he continued to watch her. Shortly, he stood up and, as he walked past her, he suddenly turned and pounced. Rosemary fell backward with Elvis on top of her.

Someone snapped a picture of their spontaneous tussle while we all laughed. Then Elvis stood up and helped Rosemary to her feet."

Elvis and Ginger (by Ginger Alden)

I think this story shows just how much of a big kid Elvis is at heart and how he enjoyed just goofing off and playing around with his friends. Something that Ginger found as one of his most endearing qualities.

While the trip was overall a great experience, it did have its ups and downs. Elvis and Ginger would have a pretty heated argument after his temper flared, and though they would talk through it, Ginger was becoming more apparent of his sudden mood swings and was becoming increasingly concerned with his use of sleeping pills.

The trip would come to an end on March 13th after Elvis had gotten sand in his eye while messing around outside, and Dr Nick advised that they return home to Memphis to recooperate as he feared that Elvis may have scratched his cornea.

This would be Elvis' final vacation, and while no one really felt that any significant change had been made toward improving his overall health and outlook, it was definitely a much needed break for him and a good change of scenery before he would return home for yet another tour that would kick off in Phoneix, AZ on March 23rd, 1977.

•

I love looking at photos from this trip cause Elvis really does seem relaxed and at peace. Hawaii was one of his favorite places to go, and I think this vacation was a much needed break for him. Of course, it didn't last very long and almost as soon as he returned, he was back to touring despite his very obviously declining health.

A vacation couldn't save him in the end, but I think it at least gave him a good distraction from his daily struggles at the time. ❤️

Here's some more photos that I really love! ⚡️

(Small disclaimer: Online, the photos of him in the blue jumpsuit and terry cloth hat are dated as March 4th, 1977 but after reading both Ginger and Larry's recounting of the vacation, I believe this was actually on March 7th as these photos were taken in Kailua once they moved into a private beach house. According to Ginger, when they were staying at Hilton Rainbow Tower, Elvis didn't go down to the beach as he wouldn't have much privacy from fans. This is speculation, however, so I'll keep the date as March 4th, 1977 as I can't be 100% sure.)

[duohensheng]

holding on to the silly billies by my fingernails (finished book 4. it’s fine). in their honour, a brief compilation of silliest moments so far, in no particular order.

- the rolling around on the floor making out is about spiritual power (I)

- the rolling around on the floor making out is about spiritual power (II: all night edition)

- xie lian stays accidentally accumulating favours from his terrifying totally not smitten definitely-not-boyfriend. exhibit a: skeleton carriage ft music, At Your Service

- who in the world could hua cheng possibly be in love with? 🤔🤯🫣😮‍💨🧐

- incorruptible chastity meatballs

- love for all seasons stew

- (he names his terrible dishes elaborate things. this is what he does in his spare time.)

- both of the above somehow becoming crucial plot points. acknowledged in-world as ridiculous by all except totally nonchalant hc

- hua cheng knocked off balance by (checks notes) seeing sleepy xie lian waking up. things that made me look up from the book and say “bro.” out loud

- the spiritual weapons only want xl to love them and pet them. yes all of them. yes literally

- Gege, Let’s Get Married

- there was —I can’t stress this enough— Only One Coffin, and it was Too Narrow. (yes they built it themselves. what’s your point)

- hua cheng can’t write. except when he can, it’s the poem about enduring love. and really he just wants xl to Hold His Hand about it

- hc as lang ying. everything about it. wdym he can eat xl’s cooking without missing a beat. he’s dragging asleep gods around so no one can look at xl bathing, himself included. he’s glaring at people sitting in his spot. he’s curling up to xl on that carriage again. he’s telling xl he’s the handsomest of all the creatures with a straight face. he’s trying to sell himself as attractive and interesting and trying to finangle an invite back to the shrine. he’s doing chores against xl’s will.

- everything about the fucking communication array group chats. ooooohhhh they have each others’ secret passwoooooord shut up.

[multishipperofgaydeadwizards]

barty has always known he was different. he stood out like a sore thumb wherever he went. people whisper about him behind his back and he has long given up on counting the amount of times he's heared people ask his mother if she's really sure he's her kid

but, no matter what people say, his mother loves him anyway. his mother with her gentle hands, kind voice and soft looks. his mother, perhaps the only person he thinks will ever love him

maybe that's why he likes sybill. she has the kind voice (even if she uses hers to spout nonesense), gentle touch (even if hers is shorter, more fleeting. almost like touching barty is a crime) and soft looks (even is hers is sometimes filled with an unimaginable amount of grieve. barty doesn't understand where it's from, but he wants to make it dissappear)

to him, sybill is like the sun with her untamed blonde curls that do whatever the hell they please, and her eyes that burn with a passion he's never seen before. he could watch her forever as she look in her crystal ball and tells him all about the future. he often hopes to be paired with her for divination—often to the dismay of regulus, who really doesn't want to work with either of the never shutting up rosier twins

barty seeks sybill out. he goes to places he knows she frequents in the hope of catching just the tiniest glimpse of her. he starts to actually eat breakfast so he can watch his fellow ravenclaw chat with the one year older aurora sinistra—he remembers her name solely because she hangs out with sybill. he starts to tag along with evan when he visits his other friends—even if he can't stand mulciber or wilkes—solely because there is a chance aurora might bring sybill along

he never confesses to her and makes sure to keep his distance. whenever he tries to get closer or make his feelings more obvious, sybill gets that look on her face. it's almost like it's wrong of him to do these things. so he watches and observes. he lives through the people who get to make sybill smile. he lives through her first boyfriend, imagining it was him kissing her and not that stuck-up griffindor that knows nothing about barty's dear billie. he imagines that his girlfriends—usually blondes with the same curly hair or the same brown eyes—are sybill

he finds her one night, sobbing her eyes put whike grasping a letter. she never tells him what's written down, the only thing she does tell him as he holds her tight and pats her back is that "nothing matters" and that "nothing changes". he holds her all through the night, even as sybill falls asleep. she kisses him that night for the first time

the second time she kisses him is behind the quidditch stands. it's not the same short back as back then in the griffindor common room, it's more feverish. she bites his lip and draws blood. her eyes are wide and her hand covers her mouth, a bit of barty's blood on his lips. if he didn't have a match in a few minutes he was sure he would've continued on with this

(he keeps biting the wound open for weeks to come. he doesn't want it to heal, for sybill's mark on him to fade)

the third time is after a prank by the marauders—it's silly name, but regulus makes sure every one of them calls them that. barty doesn't know why, but he does so anyway. sybill pulled him into a small passage way. her big brown eyes filled with worry as she looked over barty, searching for any mark or injury. she asks him in her soft, gentle voice if he's alright. he tells her that his cheek hurts, sybill kisses it. he tells her that his lips hurt too. sybill scoffs but kisses him anyway

(he carries the mark left by her lipstick for as long as it lasts, refusing to wash it off. regulus gives him a look—one that screams that he knows—but barty pretends not to notice)

the last time she kisses him is in a run-down flat in the heart of london. they're sitting on a bright red couch, sybill places on top of barty as she bites on his lips until their open and all they both taste is blood. the flat is cramped and smells like shit, but barty doesn't even think about complaining. being here is wrong and it feels so good. what would the dark lord say if he knew that barty was helping a muggleborn witch hide out just for the chance of getting her to call his name sweetly once again

she doesn't do that anymore. every time she shows up on his doorstep, her eyes are clouded by pain. she makes tea—it's bitter and gross, but to barty, it's the best tea he's ever tasted. they don't talk. just sit there in silence and drink their tea. yet, it always ends the same, on that old ugly colored couch with sybill's hands in his hair and their mouths tasting like his blood

barty is already halfway out the door by the time sybill puts a shirt—his shirt that he gave to her merlin knows when—on. she doesn't join him to the door. she just watches. but, this time, as barty turns to give her goodbye, she tells him she loves him. her eyes filled with guilt and pain. barty knows that this is the last time he'll see her

the flat burns down barley a day later. barty doesn't know if she made it out alive, but he prays that she didn't

(dying on her own terms would be much nicer than dying on the terms of the dark lord)

[coreofmyfruits]

HEAD CANNONS !

★ Billy Loomis + Stu Macher

Stu Macher ↓

Physical traits

Pigeon toed

6'4

Has to usually duck down through door ways

Slouchy posture

Has immense upper back pain

Prone to head aches

Left handed

Large hands (Billy calls them monkey paws)

Warm hands

Has a bunch of scars on his knuckles

Has a lot of scars in general but they accumulate in the same general areas

Personality

ADHD

ASD (autism spectrum disorder)

NPD (narcissistic personality disorder)

Stu got diagnosed with ADHD at a young age due to always being an interruption in class and especially silent reading, always having to get up and be doing something. Not too long after he got diagnosed with ASD because of his lack of awareness and his parents concerns about him being behind in class work (he just wasn't doing it). Stu never got properly diagnosed with NPD he never even thought of himself being a narcissist.

Likes and interests

Horror movies (mainly psychological thrillers)

His favorite movie is Eraserhead

Favorite color is black (because when he first met Billy he thought Billy's eyes looked black)

Loves to read

likes to read to Billy in silly voices (especially when it gets to a 'serious scary' part of the book)

Likes Edgar Allan Poe and Oscar Wilde

He likes hip hop and rap but really likes ska punk and surfer punk (queercore is also a must)

Likes low riders

Unironicaly loves the show Pimp my Ride

Actively ghost rides the whip

Wants a jacuzzi in his car because of Pimp my Ride

Likes to compare hand sizes with Billy because it pisses Billy off

Uses Billy's head as an arm rest

Steals Billy's clothes specifically his pants because they're baggy enough to fit but he can wear them as low-rise and he loves when Billy tells him to take off HIS pants because Stu looks 'stupid'

Stu just likes it when Billy turns red and tells him to take off his clothes

Always an opportunity to carry Billy anywhere bridal style never an opportunity not to

The scent of Billy's shampoo and how he naturally smells like pinecones and rain

Antique surgical tools

Dislikes

Bitches, cunts, liars oh my!

Sydney, not because he's jealous of her and Billy but because he used to have a crush on her

Betrayal

Abandonment

Being ignored

Talked over

Fish he fucking hates fish

The beach after it rains

Tooth pain

Unneeded laugh tracks

Sitcoms

YA romance novels

White women audacity

Starbucks

Lines

Victim mentality and complexes

Billy's stubborness

Love languages

Acts of service

Words of affirmation

Physical touch

Sexuality

Bisexual

Billy Loomis ↓

Physical traits

Slightly bow legged

5'9

Overly Straight posture

General neck pain

Tense shoulder muscles

Has Hyperacusis

Prone to migraines

Left handed

Shorter fingers wide palms and strong grip strength

Always has cold as fuck hands

Has a lot of scars mainly on his middle to lower back

Half Mexican

Easily tans

Frizzy hair

(slightly) Allergic to red food dye

Personality

ASD (autism spectrum disorder)

ASPD (anti social personality disorder)

Billy has not been diagnosed with either ASD or ASPD he's not even aware of the possibility of him having one especially not both at once. Billy's father was never around enough to notice Billy's acute behaviors or to even think of getting a specialist to diagnose him also Mr.Loomis is a lawyer it wouldn't look good for his job if his son was 'crazy'.

Likes and interests

Horror movies (slashers)

Favorite movie is before sunrise

Favorite color is teal (he would never admit it but it's because Stu looks good in teal)

Mainly listens to the same three bands (pixies, Radiohead, my bloody Valentine)

Loves the song pink triangle by weezer

Has a guilty pleasure for 40s and 50s love songs

Likes to draw

Favorite artist are Keith Haring, Andy Worhal and Francis Bacon

Draws like Franz Kafka (he doesn't know who Franz Kafka is this is just a reference to what I think his drawings would look like)

Really likes playing in the mud and jumping in puddles

Loves worms

Eats the shit out of some Oreos

Plain hotdogs

Likes how large Stu's hands are

How Stu smells like warm wool and fire

When Stu picks him up

Biting Stu (mainly his shoulders)

Stu in HIS pants

Tea

When Stu reads to him

Blood

Phantom skulls

Dislikes

Sydney, he's never even liked Sydney not before he found out about her mom and his dad and especially not after... He just always had this feeling

Tatum Riley (he looks better on Stu)

Cops pigs and donuts

Healthcare system in America

Abandonment

Betrayal

Being cut off

Being hung up on

Noise in general

Phone bills

Lawyers

Ableist(ism)

Ableist infrastructure

Gender pay gap

Misogynists

Hamburgers

Poppyseed buns

Layering clothes (he would rather freeze than put more than over shirt on)

Socks

Shoes in the house

Hot weather

Sweating

Baths

Coffee

Reading

Love languages

Words of affirmation

Acts of service

Gift giving

Sexuality

Asexual (non sex repulsed) and queer

★

Tags !

@ghostfacemp3

[yukiscoffeebreak]

-How to Break a Boy Beautifully-

---------------------------------------------exsunooxpsychoreader---------

warnings: emotional manipulation, tying, knife, mension of wounds/cuts/bruises, sweet revenge, reader is mentally sick/a psycho, lots of crying, reader finds pleasure in pain

synopsis: She doesn’t need to break him, she just wants to reshape him. Soft whispers, delicate ties, and a love so consuming, he can’t tell where she ends and he begins. Every kiss is a cage. Every touch a lesson in surrender. And somewhere between the madness and beauty, he falls.

note from author: Today is sunday and Im back with a new oneshot story. I hate sundays so I try to fill them with some writing. This one is a little shorter than the stuff I usually do. Honestly I went a little too crazy by writing this but well I hope someone likes it. Enjoy:3

songs: everything I wanted - Billie Eilish Devil In Your Eyes - Cil BABYDOLL - Ari Abdul Living Hell - Bella Poarch

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The cellar was not a room anymore. It was a shrine.

The air was heavy with perfume, soft jasmine and overripe roses, as though every molecule had been soaked in longing.

Candles burned at the edges, dozens of them, wax running down the walls like tears.

You had dressed the place in velvet and lace, covered the floor in cushions, fairy lights, broken music boxes, and pages from your old notebooks.

A piece of him in every corner.

Even you were dressed in a lacy, soft, short sleeping dress just like he loved it months before...

And in the middle of it all, tied, trembling, quiet, was Sunoo.

His body had stilled.

The panic had faded hours ago.

What replaced it was a quiet ache, a slow sadness that sat in his chest like a cold stone.

His pretty eyes, his kajal smudged with tears, his pretty soft plump and rosy lips. You loved this all.

His wrists were bound with satin now, not rope. A soft pastel mint.

His favourite colour. It didn’t bite. Not like before.

But he couldn’t move.

The bruises were fading now. You hadn’t hurt him in days. Not really. Just little things. Small things. Love-notes in pain.

A scratch here, a pressure there. Some cuts. No tortue. A memory left on skin.

And you always apologized after.

Always with a kiss.

“Baby,” you cooed from the other side of the room, “Are you tired of me yet?”

He didn’t answer.

You gasped, dramatically, clasping your hands to your chest before laughing like a maniac. “Oh, Don’t pout like that. Your lips go all pink and pretty and I just want to eat them.”

You skipped toward him, bare feet silent on the soft carpet of plush toys and rose petals.

He flinched.

You paused.

“Still scared of me?” you asked sweetly. Your smile didn’t falter. “You poor, silly thing. You always were dramatic.”

Then you were kneeling beside him. Folding down like a swan, all grace and sugar and something broken beneath the surface.

You touched his cheek.

“Oh my love, my sugarplum, my sugar-stained boy,” you whispered, brushing hair from his face. “You’re so quiet now. It’s okay. You don’t have to talk. I can do all the talking for both of us.”

He was crying.

Tears slipped down his face like glass melting.

You caught one with her finger and popped it into your mouth like candy. Closed your eyes.

“Mmm. Still sweet,” you whispered. “You taste like a boy in love. Even now.”

Sunoo whimpered, his voice fragile. “Why are you doing this…”

You smiled wider.

“Oh, my love. My darling. I’m doing this because I love you. You broke my heart, so I stitched yours into mine. Doesn’t that make sense?”

He shook his head, barely.

You pouted.

“You used to kiss my fingertips,” You said, voice almost a lullaby.

“You said I had hands like magic. Now look at them—” you held them up like a child showing a teacher their drawing, “they’re stained with your colors. All red and pretty..!”

You reached behind him, cradled his neck gently, then lowered her forehead to his.

“We used to be perfect,” you whispered. “You used to hum in your sleep. Remember that? I’d wake up just to listen. Like god had put a little symphony inside you just for me.”

You pulled back, eyes glowing.

“Do you think she ever heard that sound?” You voice went sharp for half a second. “The one you made when you slept beside someone you trusted? I don’t think she did. I think you saved that music for me.”

Sunoo was shaking now. His breath shallow.

You noticed.

“Oh, shh,” You whispered, wiping his tears again with the sleeve of your sweater. “Don’t cry....my cute, pretty perfect baby. You look too pretty like this. It breaks my heart. It breaks it all over again.”

You pressed your lips to his temple. Slow. Tender. Almost reverent.

“I’m not crazy, you know. I’m just… delicate. And in love. And maybe that’s the same thing.”

He tried to speak. His voice was a whisper, dry as dust.

“Please…”

You laid your head on his shoulder.

“I named a star after you last night,” you murmured. “I stitched your name into every wall. I sang to the basement door until it sang back. I wrote poems on your bruises and fed your ghost peaches and warm milk.”

You looked up again.

Eyes glowing. Tears at the corners. Smiling.

“I hurt you just a little. Because you needed to be softer. You needed to be still. You needed to remember that your body was mine before it was anyone else’s.”

The ribbons around his wrists tightened just slightly as he shifted.

You noticed.

“Ah-ah,” you murmured, voice silk and thorn. “Don’t wriggle. You’re too fragile. I don’t want to break your bones, sweetheart. Just your heart.”

Sunoo sobbed.

You leaned in, pressed your forehead to his, and smiled. Your lips ghosted over his like a prayer, but you didn’t kiss him.

“I could’ve been soft forever,” you whispered, eyes closed. “I would've brushed your hair every morning and made pancakes shaped like hearts. I would've written your name on foggy windows and kissed your eyelids to sleep. But you let her touch you.”

He whimpered, shaking his head. “It didn’t mean anything…”

“But it meant something to me,” you snapped, the knife twitching in your grip like a jealous limb. Then, softer again, syrup-sweet: “But that’s okay. You can make it up to me now. By staying. By crying just a little more. By being my good babyboy.”

You stood up, cheerfull with a twisted look in your eyes like a traumatized child.

“Let me show you something.”

You walked across the room and opened a box. Inside: Polaroids. Notes. A pressed flower. A receipt from your first date. The toothbrush he left behind.

“I kept everything,” you said, holding it like a baby. “Everything you forgot to care about.”

You smiled widly, broken, sick and crazy.

Then you turned, a soft tremor in your hands.

“You want to leave, don’t you?”

He didn’t answer.

“I should keep you here,” you whispered. “Until your eyes remember me. Until your breath only sings for me. Until you say my name the way you used to.”

“Oh I could keep you forever,” you whispered again. “I could put you in a velvet-lined box and keep you beside my bed. Feed you honey from my fingers. Your pretty tongue would lick it up. I would clip your wings and keep you safe.”

He shook his head, weakly. “Please, let me go…”

“Why?” you asked, your voice light. “So you can lie to someone else? So you can kiss another girl who doesn’t know your middle name? So you can forget me?!”, your voice grew a bit louder.

“I..I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I didn’t mean to—I was lost—I didn’t love h..her.”

You made a sound like a lullaby breaking.

“I know, goose. But you let her touch you. You gave her your mouth, didn’t you? You gave her that breath I, only I used to count.”

“I didn’t mean—”

“Shhhh.”

You stepped closer. The knife glinting in your hand—for now.

“I’m tired. I’m so, so tired of pretending this is forever.”

You knelt again. Reached behind him.

Undid the ribbons.

One loop.

Two.

Three.

His wrists fell forward. Free. Red. Raw.

You leaned into him, whispered against his skin:

“Go, babyboy. Run. Before I wrap you up again and sing you into stone.”

He didn’t move.

“Go,” you said again, voice breaking, tears streaming dwn your own face now. When did you became this sick? That was a question to yourself.

“Before I decide I love you too much to let the world have you.”, you said.

He stood up. Trembling.

Fear in his pretty eyes.

And he ran.

Out the door. Up the stairs. Through the dark.

You didn’t follow.

You sat there, the ribbon trailing from your fingers, smile curling at the edges.

And to no one at all, you whispered:

“You’ll come back. You always come back to the ones who break you the softest.”

But the scent of jasmine followed him as he left. And he swore he could hear you humming in B minor.

©all rights reserved

[differentsublimephantom]

Heyyy! Welcome to this (probably bad) ((also kinda rushed at times)) Ashur Gharavi cinematic universe fanfic I wrote for a school project (to clarify, I wrote the prologue and part of the main story for the project. Not this whole fic) and decided to finish, and post! Hope you like it, I figured the fandom needs more “my strange roommate” content. Btw, I write as if I’m posting on ao3 (even though I don’t yet have an account) so that’s why it has a prologue and epilogue, and “tags” so to speak. Enjoy! (Fic is under the cut 😘)

Also: @an-theduckin!!

Tags: “no beta we die like every side character in twomp, almost everyone in “the mourner” series, and marks parents, cupcake monster, and Billy Hendricks.” Also “Mr plant and Adam use sign language” also, also, “Mr plant/argos, Adam/oliver (my strange roommate, the mourner (mentioned)” lol okay I’m done now.

Prologue:

(Oliver, the human’s, pov)

I’ve never been more afraid then when I moved in with my strange roommate. I know that sounds really mean, but if you knew him you might understand. You see, my roommate is… a bit unnerving.

Wide eyes as black as the night sky, smile a bit too wide, cheeks a little too red and rosy. He looks pretty “uncanny valley” ish.

But dispite his appearance, he is the best roommate ever. He cooks for me (even though I never see him eat anything), and he cleans up the house, he’s quiet and not annoying at all! I love him. Well, not LOVE him, I would never have a crush on him! That’d be weird. And besides, he would never love me back. Right….?

(Adam, the strange roommate’s, pov)

I’ve never been more afraid then when Oliver moved in with me. He is nice enough, don’t get me wrong. But I’m not here to make friends. I was honestly surprised he was willing to stay with me, given my… appearance. But I assume he doesn’t mind. he’s convinced himself I just look a bit odd.

What Oliver doesn’t know, is that I’m not just an odd looking human. That is to say, I’m not human at all. I am not willing to say what I am, but I can say, my species is from a place called the void. And my appearance isn’t really mine, rather it’s the way my skin suit looks. I’ve avoided letting Oliver know this, because it could disturb him, and blow my cover.

Either way, Oliver doesn’t seem to notice anything suspicious. And I love him for that. Well, not LOVE him. I’m here to research humans. Not fall in love with them. I merely prefer his company. He likes me, I tolerate him. Because he is too oblivious to notice I’m not even his species.

Either that or he doesn’t care. But that’s silly, he must simply not know, because who would want to be roommates with a monster? Definitely not him…. Right?

~~~~~~~

It was around 1:00 in the afternoon when Mr Plant heard a knock on his door. Great. Unless it was his boyfriend Argos, Mr Plant hated company. And Argos was fast asleep on his sofa, taking a nap, so who could be at the door?

Reluctantly, Mr Plant opens the door, and was pleasantly surprised to see the second (no, that’s mark.) third only person Mr Plant didn’t mind as company. Someone he had know for years, and got along with because they both hated almost everyone else.

Adam stood at the door awkwardly. Standing straight and tall, and still as a statue. For normal people, even in the void, to be so perfectly still was odd behaviour. But Mr Plant knew Adam wasn’t normal, and that this was just how he is.

Mr Plant was however, very confused as to why Adam was here? He haden’t been back to the void ever since he moved in with that human man. Oliver, was it?

Mr Plant signed out “hello, Adam. Would you like to come inside?” To which he nodded in response, and the two humanoid-yet-not-humans headed in the void/house. Mr Plant gently shook his boyfriend out of dreamland, and grabbed Adam an extra chair from the kitchen.

Adam didn’t normally speak. On account of his voice sounding like he ate a 50 year old chainsmoker. Which, to be perfectly honest, he might have. But he sounded like that even BEFORE eating him. And he didn’t want to scare his roommate with his voice, but his roommate wasn’t here right now, and given his current situation, he thought it would be worth it to speak normally.

“So. It’s been a while hasn’t it?” Mr Plant and a still-sleepy Argos were surprised to hear Adam talking. “Yeah, it has. So why the sudden visit now? Have you finally grown tired of playing house-husband?” Mr plant teased. Adam rolled his eyes.

Mr Plant and Adam had stayed penpals while Adam was in the human world, so Mr Plant was aware of the fact that Adam did, well, most if not all of the household chores. He didn’t mind though! Adam didn’t have an actual job, so he was more than happy to take care of Oliver. He was in the human world to learn about how they operated, so it was great practice. He wasn’t there to make friends after all.

And that was the problem. Adam was coming to talk to his old friends for some advice, because he may have developed a small, practically tiny, unimportant, insignificant, HUGE CRUSH on his roommate. He explained this predicament in great detail to Mr Plant and Argos, the latter looking absolutely giddy the entire time.

“I’m supposed to be a monster! I’m only in the human world to learn how they work, so I can kill them! I’m supposed to hunt, and maim, and deceive. Not have dates with my roommate!!!” Adam finished, looking down at the floor. He felt rather ashamed at himself.

Mr Plant and Argos both shared a knowing and pointed look. “Well..” Mr Plant started, with Argos nodding along for encouragement. “This may sound crazy, but.. I think you should just tell him how you feel.” “WHAT?!-” “Wait- hear us out!” Argos cut Adam off.

Mr plant shrugged. “Trust me on this. Humans are weird. You may think he’ll hate you for who and what you are, but he might be kinda into it?” Argos was nodding again. “Have you lost your minds?! He’d be terrified!” “Yeah, but you don’t REALLY know that do you?” Argos raised a brow.

Adam paused.

He really DIDNT know for sure what Oliver’s reaction would be. After all, he was always watching those silly “horror” movies, and YouTube “weird core” shorts, and reading about legends of “The Mourner” that Adam knew were NOT just legends.

Maybe he would be okay with it? But still, Adam was panicking. “I KILLED his CAT for god’s sakes! Even if he knew, he’d never have me as a mate, or “boyfriend” or whatever you’d call it. And I’d probably be a terrible one.”

Argos frowned. “You don’t know that!” He countered. Mr Plant nodded, “your a good friend to me and Argos. I think you could pull off being a boyfriend if you tried. Just more practice “fitting in” with the humans right?”

Any normal person would’ve probably said “awwwww! You guys are the best!!” At that last part, but once again, Adam was not normal. so he did his equivalent, by just shifting his gaze to the floor, and shuffling in his seat, growling lowly, like a purr. Mr Plant and Argos knew what he meant.

“Besides,” Mr Plant signed again, “You already have the household chores bit down.” Adam rolled his eyes and tried to playfully punch him from across the table, but Mr Plant’s reflexes were better than they seemed, so Adam hit air.

After a bit more chatting, and giving Adam a pep talk from Argos, Adam realized he had to get home to make dinner before Oliver got home. So, with some more teasing from Mr Plant, and a wink and thumbs up from Argos, Adam headed home. Ready to tell his roommate the truth.

~~~~~~~~~~

It was 6:30 exactly when Adam heard the distinct sound of a key in the front door lock. Right on time. Oliver came in, said hello, and sat down to eat. Thankfully Oliver knew sign, because his little Neice used it, so Adam knew communicating wouldn’t be too hard. He wasn’t quite ready to use his voice yet.

He tapped twice on the table to get Oliver’s attention. “Oh- yeah? What’s up.” “I have something to tell you.” Adam said. Oliver blinked like he was a bit surprised. “Oh- um, actually I have something to tell you too!” Adam’s “heart” raced. He was going to say he wanted to move out. Or that he hated Adam. Or that he knew what a monster Adam truly was. Or- “I’ve been thinking about this for a long time now, and I know it may sound a bit strange. Especially coming from me.” Oliver took a breath. “But- will you consider going on a date with me?”

Well. Adam certainly wasn’t expecting THAT. But the longer Adam took to respond, the more Oliver looked like he was about to cry. So before he could start to ramble out an unnecessary apology for asking, Adam stopped him by tapping on the table again. “Uh, yeah? I’m listening.”

Adam thought for a moment, then signed. “In all honesty, I would love to. But first- I have to tell you what I was going to say.” “Oh! Yes, of course! Sorry if I sorta cut you off with that.” Oliver mumbled.

Adam looked him up and down from across the table. “Just promise you won’t scream, or get scared.” “Yeah, okay. Go ahead.” Oliver waited patiently while Adam took a big deep breath. Alright. This is it. The moment of truth.

“Oliver. I’m.. not a human.” Adam waited. One minute. Two minutes. Two and a half minutes. And then he heard Oliver exhale. No, not just exhale. LAUGH. He was….. laughing..?

Adam became more confused when Oliver almost doubled over with laughter and giggles. The cutest giggles Adam had ever heard. “What’s so funny… aren’t you concerned that you’ve been living with a monster for the past 5 months?” That seemed to make the giggles finally slow down.

“Adam, THIS was the “big thing” you had to tell me?” Oliver asked cautiously. “Yes?” Adam was very nervous. Why was his roommate acting so strange? “Adam…”

“I already know.”

What. WHAT. No. No! That can’t be true. This must be Oliver’s weird human threat response kicking in. Telling him as such, and that he should lie down for a minute, only resulted in more laughing. “Adam. Bestie. Roomie. Sweetie. No offence, but you don’t hide the fact that you’re not human very well.”

“I……don’t?” “No! You never do atleast half the things a normal human would do.” “Like what?” Adam questioned. “You don’t eat, nor sleep. You don’t brush your teeth or take showers, but somehow don’t smell bad. Your chest doesn’t move when you BREATHE. Plus, you have a zipper running down your neck.”

Adam blinked, and looked at the floor sheepishly. “I thought I hid the zipper..” Oliver just laughed again, and got up from his seat at the table, quickly crossing the room to where Adam was sitting with too-perfect posture. Adam just glanced up at him. “What else gave it away?” He asked carefully.

“Other than that, the cat thing.” Adam gave a look that said “I’m sorry.” And Oliver knew what it meant. “That, and, some features are just a bit off.” “What do you mean?” “Well, your eyes are a bit too wide, and as black as the night sky. Your smile is a bit too wide, and your cheeks a little too red and rosy.”

Adam’s feelings weren’t hurt by those comments so much as he was taken aback. And also devastated, because he assumed he knew what Oliver meant by all that. “Its alright. You can leave. I won’t do anything to you.” It was Oliver’s turn to be taken aback. “What?! No- Adam. You may be a bit creepy, and you may not be human, and yes, you might have accidentally cooked my cat. But- I don’t care. I love you.”

Woah. Adam had never heard those words before from anyone. Sure, he knew what they meant, and he had seen people say it to each other on the cheesy rom-coms Oliver sometimes watched on tv. But no one had ever said them to HIM. And now he understood why the silly humans in those rom-coms had acted so happy after hearing them. Adam felt wonderful.

“Really? You mean that. Seriously, if you don’t, then you can say so.” Adam checked once more to make sure his roommate wasn’t just delirious from either shock or exhaustion.

Instead of a reply, Adam got a kiss.

A messy one, of course. Adam had never kissed anyone before, so he didn’t have much practice. But he got better with time. Trust Oliver on that, he would know.

Epilogue:

Ring……ring……ring…… “hello!” Oliver was only mildly surprised to see that the friends Adam was video calling were a man with a plant face and a man with eyes all over his body. “You guys were right. Oliver is okay with me. And he’s now my boyfriend.” Adam signed.

The one with too many eyes, apparently named Argos, absolutely beamed. While the plant rolled his eyes, and reached to pull something out of his pocket. The last thing Oliver caught before a bunch of uncontrollable laughter, was Argos yelling “Mr Plant!! You owe me twenty dollars!!!” And his boyfriends own rough voice shouting “hey!!!”

The end!

[sircarebearalot]

keep it simmering baby

up for adoption bc while i am def gonna write this baby some day, i'd LOVE too see others do thsi too and honstely if i post it here it's bc it's up for grabs

han sooyoung and kim dokja go to couples cooking bc they both can’t cook

(kdj, having been in the claws of poverty, never had the ingredients, energy and time, and now he just wanst a fool proof way to learn from scracth

hsy, having lived her youth in the lap of luxury, has always ordered takeout and is now emabrarred by her completely inability to contribute in the kitchen)

and they want to be a fucntionng adult for their partners, yoo 'tsundere star chef' joonghyuk and yoo 'perfect human being' sangah

they decide to sign up for a couples class bc that's less embarassing than just straight up admitting they don't know how and there aren't really classes for hopeless adults and also bc it's cheaper and they are both hopeless cheapskates

so yes, consider they are spending money and time together in a place where their partners aren't aware... does that look good?

lucky for them!! their partners are logical enough to know that kdj and hsy would never cheat on them (BC THEY ARE SUCH SIMPS) nevermind with eachother, unfortaunaltey, kdj and hsy's rep is bad enough for yoo joonghuk and yoo sangah to think that they have found themselves into trouble with .... wait for it.... THE LOCAL MAFIA!!!

so, see in this episode where kim dokja and best friend, han sooyoung go to a couple cooking class and (grudungly and painstakingly) pretend to be in love while all the attendeant, much older couples, fawn over them --- and one younger couple eye them mistruftully bc they think that kdj and hsy are cheating on therui couples bc (why the hell not) kim com are alll low level famous, (hsy is an author, kdj is an editor---whcih no one cares about bc he is also yjk's boo) and the young couple are very salty about it but OFC THEY WON'T POST ABOUT IT BC THAT'S AGAISNT THE SACRED RULE OF COUPLES COOKING BUT LOOK, LOOK??? HOW COULD KDJ RUTHLESSLY BREAK YJK'S HEART??? AND WHAT HAPPENED TO THE SIMPING FAITHFULNES OF HSY???

anyways, that is happening there in that studio, while on the other side of town, yoo joonghyuk and yoo sangah have enlisted kimcom to take down the fearsome mafia to save the two fool that aren't even in trouble.

naturally this epsiode will feature hilarious cutawar moments such as thsi one...

["Do you think Sangah is thinking of me right now?"

"I'm sure she is cutting down the city wondering where you are at," Kim Dokja replies drolly, as he poked mistrustfully at a perfectly fine tomato.

On the other side of town, Yoo Sangah smiles angelically at a mob boss, who was on his knees and holding his right pec protectively. "You will answer my questions, won't you? Where is Han Sooyoung and Kim Dokja?"

"Who?" the mob boss demands.

Yoo Sangah's smile tightens and she nods at Yoo Joonghyuk, who's eyes are gleaming with a slightly demonic light. He advances once again and the mob boss' pleas of ignorance are ignored.]

and ofc

["I don't even know if Joonghyuk will eat my food," Kim Dokja sulked, looking moodily after the instructer that had failed at hiding a grimace at Kim Dokja's liberal use of spice. "He only eats his own cooking anyways."

"Don't you want to feed those brats like the responsible ajjussi they think you are?"

"You have a point," he sighs. "I hope they have finishied their homework."

Not too far away, Lee Gilyoung and Shin Yoosung are arguining on how they will punish the criminals for taking Kim Dokja away (the adulst of kim com failed to remeber how the kids have access to the baby monitors), kimcom for leaving them out of the rescuing ('that jerkface is going to pay for keeping me from rescuing hyung!!"), and each other for allowing such a tragedy to take place. All while a fierce baby Biyoo chimes on with an ocassionaly 'Baat!']

so, stay tuned for the misadventures of silly gooses and silly billies alike!!

[flkwh0re]

Babysitter

Warnings: Mommy kink (W), age gap, slight pervy Wanda, Masturbation, Somno, slight Dubcon, cheating (Wanda cheats on Vision), little fluffy! (please tell me if i left some warnings out!!)

Wc: 1.6k

A/n: If you don’t like this idc :) just scroll or block me if you don’t like this content!

part two here

——————————⧗ᗢ——————————

You had been babysitting the Maximoff twins since you were in high school, but now being in college you were hardly ever able to. That was until Wanda found out you were home for a few days and sent you a text asking if you didn't mind to watch the boys for the evening while her and her husband went out for dinner.

You never liked Jarvis, he would always give you weird looks when Wanda was around you. You had noticed a change in Wanda's demeanor towards you when you came home again a couple months ago. You just brushed it off as him being weird, but you were completely wrong.

Little did you know Wanda had not been able to get you out of her mind, she would catch herself thinking about you at all points of the day. She thought it was just because she missed you, but when she found herself with her fingers buried in her pussy, holding her phone displaying a picture of yourself you had posted on Instagram. It felt so wrong, but oh so right.

You hesitantly rung the doorbell, waiting for someone to answer the door. You never understood your shyness around Wanda, you thought it was some silly little teenage girl crush. It most definitely wasn't as it strengthened in you adulthood.

"Hi sweetheart!" Wanda greeted happily, pulling you into a hug. The smell of her perfume crowded your senses, making you feel weak. "Ugh, I've missed you so much!" She placing a little kiss on your forehead, a tint of pink gracing you cheeks. "I've missed you too, Wanda."

She brought you to the living room, and made some little small talk with you while she waited for Jarvis. She asked you all about your second year in college, the trips you had taken, your friends, and lots more. Wanda just loved hearing you talk about things you do, and things you loved.

You were interrupted by Jarvis' trudge down the stairs. "Darling, are you ready?" He said smugly, giving you a look. "Yes, let me call the boys down. Y/n there's chicken nuggets in the freezer, you can fix them for them. Kitchen is yours so you fix whatever you want, house too. Once the boys are asleep feel free to do whatever, just don't destroy the house." She send you a little wink, and you nodded your head.

"Boys!" She called out to her twin boys, and they came running out of their room. "Tommy, Billy. Mommy and daddy are going out tonight, be on your best behavior for Y/n." The two boys nodded eagerly, excited for their evening with you. Wanda said her goodbyes to you as Jarvis stood annoyed and impatient. Once they had left you turned to the boys, "Who's ready for some fun!?"

Wanda and Jarvis had been gone for an hour now, Tommy and Billy were eating their dinner while you prepared yours. They excited to finish, because you promised if they did you'd all play on their shared playstation for a few hours.

After you all had finished, you played until it was time for them to go to bed. Their protest made you giggle as you drug them up to bed. "Sorry boys, but your mom would kill me if you weren't in bed on time." They both groaned, but still complied nonetheless.

You walked back down to the living room, curling up on the couch taking your laptop out of your bag, hoping to get some work done for your classes. You didn't know you'd wind up clutching onto a blanket coated in Wanda's sent, your nimble fingers rubbing your clit. The tips of your fingers prod at your aching hole, as you imagined Wanda's fingers buried deep inside you.

The sudden sound of the door opening, sent you into a panic. You pulled your hand out, trying to readjust the blanket as best as possible. You get on your phone and scroll through TikTok trying to seem as normal as possible. "Hey sweetheart we're back." Wanda said as Jarvis walked off. "Hi Wanda, give me just a second and I'll be out of your hair.”

"Oh Y/n why don't you spend the night, it's too late for a girl your age to be out this late." She insisted. "Wanda I'm not a little girl anymore." You chuckled, walking into the hallway by the door where Wanda stood. "Oh but you are, you're my little girl." Wanda said, your face heating up.

"W-wanda I-" She cut you off by placing a her finger on your lips. "Shh, let mommy do the thinking. Stay the night, and once Jarvis goes to bed I'll come back to you." She husk in your ear, her hand snaking around your front. "But Wanda, h-he's your husband.. you’re married." She laughed, "You don't think I'm aware? He's not been much of onefor years, and I can't get my mind off you. I need you sweet girl, please let mommy have you."

You hesitate, but nod your head. Her hand slips underneath your shirt, groping at your tits. "We have time for a little fun real quick." She whispered into your ear, the sultry tone in her voice makes you shiver. Her hand runs down your body and slips into your pants, rubbing your slit through your panties. She gasp as she feels how wet you are, "You're so wet detka, what were you doing? Tell mommy."

"I-I was on your couch, t-touching myself." You whimpered out, any dignity you had was now gone. Her fingers slip into your panties, rubbing your swollen clit. She sucks lightly on your neck, leaving little marks on your delicate skin.

Her slender fingers plunge into your aching cunt, thrusting steadily in and out of you. You try your best to choke back your moans, but you accidentally let a loud moan slip past your lips. Wanda quickly brought her hand to your mouth, covering it. "Shh be a good girl for mommy, we don't want my husband to catch us now do we?" You shake your head, indicating a desperate no.

Your legs begin to buckle, as your orgasm crashes through. Muffled moans escape your throat, as Wanda fucks you through your orgasm. The hand on your mouth retracts as she helps your regain composure. You watch her as she sucks your slick off her fingers, moaning around the digits as she savors your taste.

"I can't wait to taste you for real baby." Wanda says excitedly, as she pulls you into a kiss. "Alright, let's get you to bed. I'll be back down in about an hour.” She says as she leads you to the spare room.

You tried your best to get a little sleep, and right before Wanda came in you managed to doze off. She smiled at your sleeping state, pulling the sheets of your body. She softly moves your body so she can remove your shorts and panties. A groan escapes her lips at you still dripping cunt.

She places her head between your legs, dropping soft kisses on you thighs. Her tongue licking soft licks on your swollen clit, running down to your hole prodding at it. It wasn't until Wanda harshly sucked on your clit, that you began to stir awake. Little whimpers and moans escaped your sleepy self, thighs softly clamping around Wanda's head.

"You taste so good detka," she whispered into your pussy, the vibration of her voice making you whimper even more. She loved how vocal you were, how sensitive and reactive you were. She hasn't had sex like this ever, Jarvis could never truly give her pleasure.

She slipped her digits into your cunt. "Oh fuck mommy!" You moaned at the sudden fullness. You loved feeling so desperate and weak for Wanda, and she loved it too. "Fuck! 'M gonna cum mommy!" Groans and cries left you as she fucked you hard through the ecstatic orgasm.

She straddled her bare pussy on yours, rutting it against yours. "Mm no mommy, 'm too tired. Please st-stop." You begged her, but the thrust of her hips quickened. "No detka, mommy wants to cum. Help make mommy cum."

Her slick mixed with yours, her pussy rubbing on your own sensitive one made you feel crazy. "Fuck sweetheart, mommy's gonna cum! Cum with mommy." With her demand, cum gushed from you leaking onto her pussy, mixing with her own cum.

"Good girl, mommy's so proud of you." She said, placing a soft kiss on your lips. "You think you can give mommy one more? I wanna ride your face." You nodded sloppily.

She slipped off your body, straddling your face. Her slick cunt making contact with your lips. Your tongue slipped past your lips, licking a bold stripe on her pussy. "Fuck, just like that detka."

You swap from weakly licking and sucking on her core, you tried your best but you were so week from your previous orgasms you couldn't keep a steady pace. Wanda pitied you and ordered you to stick your tongue out, grinding her cunt on it. Getting just enough friction to cum. Her cum dripped down your throat, you had never tasted someone as good as her.

"You did so good for me baby, such a good good girl!" Wanda praised. "Thank you mommy." You weakly squeaked.

Wanda laid down next to you, pulling your smaller body into her. Kiss your lips softly, then your forehead. Wanda knew she had to do something about Jarvis, she just had to make you hers so bad! She'd do whatever she had to, just to keep you for herself.

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