#sighhhh I love her so much

[ethereal-maia]

Marya Hendriks from the Six of Crows duology by Leigh Bardugo

[not-xpr-art]

Martha Jones - digital painting ~

(04/2023)

the next art in my celebration of the 60th anniversary of doctor who! and of course for my birthday month I had to draw my absolute favourite companion, martha <3

[bonecuisine]

Women..pretty dress..

[nuclearknight]

he he i’ve missed hanging out with my friends sm the homoerotic tension was sorely missed and on that note guess who’s a lil bit closer to that threeway WINK WINK

[conanssummerchild]

im rewatching the good place again and its at the episode where micheal has that whole existential crisis about dying and chidi kinda says how he had one too and i was remembering my friend who said she had one when she discovered death as a kid, that never happened to me?? is that a common thing???

[moviestarmartini]

madridista by choice — carlos sainz x f!reader.

summary: after expressing a small interest, carlos wants to go all in teaching his girlfriend about his beloved club. you’re a bit too proud to admit you’re beginning to understand why he loves it so much. but it also gives him an idea for a great bday gift you could both enjoy.

warnings: none! mostly a smau, short paragraphs as intro. pre-established relationship. few sentences in spanish. part of a series ! ( read part one here )

fc: blanca soler

“So?” Carlos asked after you passed the doorway of your shared apartment after dinner.

“It was fun,” You admitted with your lips pressed into a thin line as he approached your side, fixing the scarf.

Yet you added, “Even though it’s stressful. How do you do it?”

“It’s not always like that, amor,” He laughed, pressing a kiss to your cheek.

“Would you be willing to attend other matches with me?”

You thought about it for a few minutes. He noticed; he could see the way your eyes looked a few miles ahead of him and your teeth tugged on your bottom lip slightly. The ambiance was electrifying, and even though you didn’t understand much yet, the sentiment of unity and love for the institution was easily transmitted to you.

“Yeah, sure.” You nodded, and before you could say anything else, he was squeezing the life out of you.

“Only said yes because I don’t know if you’ll find tickets for the final.” You let out a strained laugh. At the end of the day, his happiness was your own.

yourusername recently posted to their story!

liked by carlossainz55, landonorris, judebelligham and others

yourusername gracias dulzuras for all the bday wishes 🥰 and hala madrid ! 🤍 best way to spend the evening

see all 5698 comments

carlossainz55 cada vez que vienes conmigo ganamos, de ahora en más vamos a todos los partidos importantes juntos jajajaa (every time you come with me we win, from now on we’ll go to all important matches together)

-> yourusername weird way of saying you want to spend every waking hour by my side but okay

-> landonorris i hate to be like this but you're both so annoying to sit through a match with

-> yourusername celoso 🙄

username GOD WHEN IS IT MY TURN

username jude you're not slick in the likes we see you

carmenmmundt i loved having you over 🥹

-> yourusername thank you for helping carlitos organize my bday dinner 🥲💓

-> georgerussell63 actually i picked the restaurant

-> yourusername um actually 🤓☝️

-> yourusername kidding kidding, thank u too g you’re a real one x

username OMG THE WHITE HEART IN HER TWEET SHOULD’VE GIVEN IT AWAY

-> username mastermind because i would’ve never linked the two together

username seriously? this man only gifted her tickets to a match of his own football club??? that was a gift for himself

-> username fr men be like that

-> username real (i want her tho)

-> username sighhhh why are y’all weird???

A/N: i’m doing a bonus part but !! thank u for reading 🤭 i’m so glad i got to use uk!carlos for this hehe

[soojinieshifts]

INTRO TO…

MY LE SSERAFIM DR

Hana Arie Anná, mononymously known as Ari, is a Chinese actress, singer, and rapper of girl group LE SSERAFIM under HYBE’s Subsidiary Label Source Music. She had her solo debut on June 12, 2024 with the mini album “Dark Dreams”.

!★☆ 𝑨𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝑴𝒆

#☆…! Name: Han Arie Anná

#☆…!Stage Name: Ari

#☆…!Race: Asian

#☆…!Gender: Female

#☆…!Sexuality: Lesbian

#☆…!Pronouns: She/her

#☆…!Birthday: June 10, 2002

#☆…!Age: 21

#☆…!Zodiac sign: Gemini

#☆…!Place of birth: Wuhan, China

#☆…!Siblings: Kevin, Rachel, handong, xiaojun, ningmei (twin sister)

!★☆ 𝑰𝑫𝑶𝑳 𝑺𝑻𝑼𝑭𝑭!!

#☆…!Brands: Chanel, Calvin Klein, Adidas, and Sanrio

#☆…!Positions: Lead Rapper, Lead Dancer, Sub-Vocalist, Center, and Producer

#☆…!Titles: Chinas Princess, Face of China, 4th gen’s hot girl, 4th gen rapper, 4th gen it girl

#☆…!Solo fandom: Ariboos

#☆…!Rep. Emoji: 🦊

#☆…!Projects: GLITZY! by Girls Generation (ft. ARI of LE SSERAFIM) - 2022, Dream Girl by Chungha (ft. ARI of LE SSERAFIM) - 2023, Diamond by KAZUHA (ft. YEJI of ITZY and ARI of LE SSERAFIM) - 2024 , Luv Me by JENNIE (ft. ARI of LE SSERAFIM) - 2023, Wish You hell (My pre release single before my solo debut) - 2024, DARK DREAMS (my official solo debut!) - 2024 , Magic by nayeon (ft. ARI of LE SSERAFIM) - 2024

#☆…!Trainee time : 6 years and 3 months

!★☆ 𝐑𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩𝐬 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒎𝒆𝒎𝒃𝒆𝒓𝒔!!

🐯Chaewon — Best friends! Was close during her Iz*one days and have gotten stronger since. SHES ALSO THE MOST DELUSIONAL BITCH YOU WILL EVER MEET LIKE MY GOD. She has an obsession with gummy bears and other fruity candy currently. And she’s back with her ex (this is a good thing! I love them together!) so she’s finally stopped screaming ripping her hair out over her! I love giving her songs to cover cause it’s fun. And her vocal tone makes me ascend to the heavens tbh.

🌸Sakura — THIS IS MY MOM!! I actually love Sakura so much and I’m so mad that freaking swing RUINED her voice. Her natural voice is so pretty and I used to have her sing me lullabies back when I was scared to sleep alone because of the massive hate I got in 2022. She’s so amazing and it makes me so sad that people don’t see it and I love her talent and wished she didn’t feel the pressure to be the best all the time. I love her and Mina together (I want them to adopt me.) but I don’t love seeing them make out in the living room. I watched her once fall to her news because of my “alleged” project with Sabrina carpenter as she proceeded to beg me to take her to meet her…..(I did).

🦒Yunjin — SIGHHHH. Jennifer huh…(or as I call her Jenni!). We started off as basically attached by the hip,! Like this girl was my best friend fr and then we started dating 😭 (she asked me out in the most craziest way tbh…). Probably one of the most amazing things ever cause she was literally the most perfect gf….until she wasn’t. Long story short: we broke up and it was messy as shit. Then I got with ryujin and She started getting mad at me for weird reasons and then we were back to best friends like we used to be…AND THEN ON FREAKING TOUR SHE TOLD ME SHE WANTED ME BACK EVEN THOUGH SHE KNOWS IM HAPPY WITH RYUJIN??? Long story short….we’re just friends now but not as close as once were and it makes me sad cause..Jenni ☹️😞

🦢Kazuha — MY ZUHAAAAA MY SWEET SWEET BABY!! I actually was the main one who talked to her during trainee days and we still are just as close! This is basically my little sister and when she had her solo debut I freaking SOBBED because of the song she made for me :(. She’s my sweet little swan and has a very big collection of white tennis shoes…SHE ALSO STARTED DATING BELLE FROM KIOF AND I ABSOLUTELY LOCE THEM!! Ballerina and the princess is what they are.

🐈Eunchae — so this is my daughter Eunchae!! I’m not joking when I say I spoil and baby her. She’s literally my little and I just love her and her chubby lil cheekies. She goes through weird phases like how she used to always say “Gyatt” whenever I walked in the room….She always comes to me mainly whenever she’s overwhelmed or when things do become too much for her and I try my best to make sure she gets to live her life as a kid since she still is one. She has had a few cutie crushes on ppl but I don’t think she’ll date anyone right now. (And she’s scared to date rn…)

!★☆ 𝐑𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩𝐬!

#☆…!Friends: NingNing, Seijun, Jennie, Jungkook, Soyeon, Hobi, Beomgyu, Felix, Jisung, Yeji, Garam, Jaylie, Natty, Jiheon, Maeyo, Keeho, Nabi, River, Reverie

#☆…!Gf: Ryujin of ITZY

#☆…!Exes: Jurin (2021-2021), Yunjin (2022-2024 I think ???)

[jazzyblusnowflake]

You've got some cool headcanons for Nuzi and Vuzi, but what about the third? You got any for EnVy?

Wow i suck at answering these on time smh. sighhhh, in my defense i procrastinate answering some questions cuz i don't wanna just put together some random stuff and call it a day-

i actually wrote some stuff for some asks before but had to delete it last minute cuz i thought its worth putting more time than that, i guess TvT sorry, im probably taking this too seriously idk.

My eNVee headcanons TvT:

[yall know the drill, the drone versions only, the human versions aren’t involved, and no nsfw- for now.]

k so, light envuzi involved too, Uzi is the mediator here, whether u consider her a friend here or their mini toaster in the middle- also there's some of the stuff from my future version where V is safe and sound thankfully. and also maybe some stuff from their past too.

With how N was realizing that V was lying or hiding stuff from him in a constant manner, naturally he grew to grieve the loss of who V USED to be, and with that loss he tried to accept that he has to let her go, because the V he fell in love with was long gone. despite this, when they both started teasing each other over their relationship with Uzi and N started to bite back a bit at Vs behaviors with more self confidence, they grew to form a completely different kind of relationship. Uzi was just having fun seeing them try to win her over lmao; but in the end they kind of started enjoying eachothers company again. Uzi felt happy seeing them get closure for the things they went through and was more than happy to support them through it.

Back at the manor V was fixed up after J and N, she was one of the later drones added to the family, she hardly spent much time at the manor at all before the great yeetening happened- she was originally a maid drone for a family before she was broken and dumped in the drone corpse junkyard. Maid drones are programmed with sweet and soft AIs with more round/short body shapes to have a friendly image in a household, they are made to be able to deal with both adults and kids, and they are best made for cleaning and setting up the house in mind. N was made as a butler/chauffeur before getting broken and yeeted in the junkyard [yes he can drive]. Due to V getting broken for some sort of mistake during work, she was left scarred after her reboot to make any more mistakes, which left her slightly jitter-ish and clumsy. Tessa put N in charge to help her around and although at the beginning V didn't talk much and felt unsure, slowly N became her safe space- especially since Tessas abusive parents remind V alot of her old household. N in turn thought V was always cute, he helped her with her work, having more steady hands, which ended with a lot more hand touching and blushing on both their ends :p

N was the one that suggested glasses for V which Tessa decided to try doing to see if it would help her visual efficiency in any way, and it did. V as a DD often tries to rely on her real eyes rather than look through her main visor, the glasses remind her too much of N...

N and V sometimes used to get out of the manor in secret spots to spend some time away from the chaos to help V calm down. during this time they would read books, learn stuff from each others past lives, and sometimes draw lol, but V just liked watching and listening to N, she felt happy with him. although unlike N, V felt a bit nervous around the animals in the area XD

N and V actually have shared kisses, just not on the lips. with N kissing her on the back of her hand as a gentleman and V giving him kisses on his cheek [Tessa's idea of a cute plan to put them under a mistletoe lol], but Vs last words to N was a promise to give him a kiss before she became comatose. as more drones in the manor stopped working and Ns efficiency and work became less useful to the manors occupants due to him wanting to spend time with V all the time, Louisa and James started becoming more impatient with Tessa's drones, which lead to the whole "get rid of them" line...

back in the current time V is obviously trying to protect N in her own traumatized way; but even then, most of the things she had done to "shelter" N, was probably not the best choice one could make, and some of it was done out of jealousy towards N and Uzi getting closer. However, slowly she started convincing herself that N deserved someone like Uzi. V had convinced herself that she deserves nothing. She was willing to give up everything for N and keep him safe from the beginning, even if it meant knocking N down a few limbs/heads just to keep him away from danger- which is problematic in itself. she made choices based off fear and urgency. she was always traumatized.

When N and V started getting along together a bit more and hanging around a bit in the human cities- V takes N to a bookstore she found once and they spent the whole day in the shelter of the store reading different old books. V still does not admit she did this to see N happy again lol.

When N started showing V affection again, V started becoming heavily touch starved and dependent on him again, just like the manor days, which she feared, which caused a minor set back for a while where she tried to avoid N. Uzi had to come and fix this shit cuz apparently only she can scold 2 dinosaurs without feeling intimidated. after N and V kiss for the first time PROPERLY after the whole solver BS ends, V just gets more touch starved and she hates both N AND Uzi for this lmao.

N and Uzi know that one of the only ways to make V calm down is to act soft with her, occasionally praising her and calling her nice things; even when V is literally threatening to bite their head off- [shes bluffing-.......mostly.]

N is usually the one that initiates any closeness with V. after their first kiss, N does tell her that she's done stuff that he might not be able to casually forgive, but at the same time he has seen her grow, and she does have good in her that he still loves her for.

V has nightmares and hardly ever sleeps, and when she does, its usually cuddling N or Uzi.

V tries to wear her glasses more often in the future. N likes it a lot :"3

V is surprisingly a good mom :p [spoilers for my au lmao bye] but yeah, since her original OS was for a maid, she still has some functions to be good with little ones. she cant help herself, she just really likes babies and kids.

N likes sometimes ballroom dancing with V for old times sake...

[i think this is as far as my brain will allow me, please excuse me as i jump off a cliff :") ]

[artdcnaldson]

last one i promise.. the snail in my ear won’t shut up….. just imagining that idk the boys (art at least. he was a late bloomer. patrick is a horndog) never really saw you like #that until a few years ago… you come back to the academy from summer break one year and they’re like wait a damn minute……. you idk kinda #grew up that summer. started idk caring more about how you look, dressing a little more girly or something. you started caring more about boys etc etc. art is like oh fuck!!! patrick is like yeah i’ve been telling you!!! you’re all grown up now and it makes them dizzy kinda

but you also have started seeing them less as annoying older brothers and more as #men. you never really looked at them that way, the boys who shoved their gym socks in your face and teased you and did goofy things with you. your partners in crime. and the summer before college doesn’t help this for you…..

Nooo don’t apologize I love your asks and would happily accept a million more 🩷

But sighhhh

Envisioning reader growing up as a total tomboy, big oversized clothes that hid her figure, no makeup, a bit of an awkward wallflower. You’re their best friend!! They didn’t ever look at you and imagine what was going on beneath your clothes. Not that much, I mean. Like they imagined but it was all just out of curiosity, not any real desire. (Which is what they told themselves)

But the summer before Stanford you change your mind on that suddenly. Because you know what they look like, but suddenly there’s a flutter in your chest when they take their shirts off in front of you after a day at the court. And your face burns when they lounge around in nothing but their boxers. And maybe you don’t want them (maybe), but you want to attract guys like them. they’re going on dates with girls in halter tops and juicy couture jogging suits with pretty hair and glossy lips and what seems like miles and miles of visible skin.

So maybe you buy new clothes before your stay at Patrick’s fucking summer home— skimpy swimsuits, tee shirts that are tight and reveal your midriff, tiny shorts and tinier skirts. You just want to fit in, you want to feel like a cool girl for once.

And Jesus, it’s like a cosmic shift. You’re still you, still the same girl they’ve been friends with, but they’re noticing the long line of your legs, the way your shirts hug your tits. They whisper about it at night, when you’re tucked away in your own room, about how nice your tits are, how they could see the curve of your ass peeking out from beneath a tennis skirt.

They thought you were hot before— would’ve done anything to make you smile or laugh or roll your eyes. But now… god, you consume their every waking thought.

[jils-things]

I would never fall in love again until I found her

I said, "I would never fall unless it's you I fall into"

I was lost within the darkness, but then I found her

I found you

[3.25.23]

ouueeehh we're back to my corny love letters like last time 💜 again absolutely NO pressure reading these, because it WILL get lengthy 💜 this also serves as a personal love letter that i can archive!

ahh, steven st.one. a wild card in my f/o list. i never thought i'd find myself to like him... i've always tried my best to avoid the pretty boy design after i've gotten older which is why i was oddly in denial during my early steven days hehe... the earliest memory i have of him is just me battling him in my ruby emulator back in the 4th grade - but i don't think i actually remembered him too well, i only thought he looked like a silly anime version of the classical composer be.ethoven and tbh, i still like to think he does look like him in the rse style lolll 💜

for the whole, actual story - it was just last year - i was reading the r/s arc, of course. it was one of those days in school where i had nothing much to do and snuck my phone to read manga to pass some time. at some point, my classmate joined to read with me - it was at this moment where steven debuts properly and it caught my classmate by Surprise. she thought he looked very handsome! to which i teased her... strangely enough, this exchange impacted me? maybe it's because someone acknowledged what i was doing and even bothered to briefly read along with me - so in a way steven kinda bookmarked that memory.

so after that exchange, i just kept on reading. everytime he had something to say, i couldn't help but just stare at his face? he looked nice, i guess? he's also very gentle and polite... i kept this thought of mine for quite sometime until i was discussing the manga arc with my p.okespe mutual and he mentioned him. i somewhat confessed he looked nice and that was the biggest mistake i've ever done because what my friend did after was absolutely blow me with art after art of the pretty rock collector and i was STRUGGLING. it ultimately came down to this one cute panel in the o.ras chapter where he was blushing and I wasn't the same person since then 🚶🚶🚶and funnily enough, i told myself I wasn't going to fall for anyone because of the manga and whoopedoo p.okespe!steven my beloved the greatest man ever. i mean i love the game counterpart as well, they're nearly identical - it's just the manga that totally swept me... sighhhh

steven is such a nice character to begin with, he's honestly a very humble and nice champion. he's not showy about his identity and would rather be alone by himself to indulge in what he wants. he is willing to give up a very respectable position in the po.kemon league just to pursue his interests and with that i see a man not after power and fame but a man who just wants to find joy in what he does even if it demotes him. on top of that, he's just a sweet gentleman. he was raised well of course, and you can see it clearly in his acts in the story. i love him very much for that and who wouldn't want those traits?

i was really absolutely embarrassed to be all over this guy at first - it took a whole month for me to actually share to my blog about how i liked steven and took awhile to adjust to that fact that i opened up about it 😭 but the community was very kind and supportive about the pairing and if i'm being honest, i think stevaide made a super lasting impact on my blog recently and it's really so comforting to picture them as a young loving married couple with ruby. it made me feel unashamed with what i can do with my silly ships. i'm still very glad for the endless support for steven and jaide.

soo, yes. happy memoryshipping 💜💚 thank you for making my times of struggle more bearable if not perfect and thank you to everyone who enjoys this ship even if it was just a little bit :]

credits to @/cafekitsune <3

[xqllin]

tbhk 115 rant </3

god this whole chapter was a harder read than the entirety of jjk

obviously the biggest change in this chapter was hanako following his future as planned

before actually reading the chapter i alrdy saw the panels and read through em but actually reading it and not through a tiktok slideshow fr broke me

when i first read that hanako was supposed to be a science teacher i cried

but now that im reading about hanako being a science teacher, one that students are comfortable enough to be asking for advice and career guidance and can genuinely have fun with I'M CRYING AGAIN WAAAAHHG

he looks like such a friendly teacher i'd love him irl, as someone who would've joined an astronomy club if my school had had one :')

and with this new present, the fact that kou and nene never interacted, HANAKO AND NENE NEVER MET AS WELL

i hate this 😭 bring the old timeline back..

that whole scene with nene talking about how the 'plant' she's been taking care of, which represents the old world

being replaced with a "prettier" pot of plant, the new present which is indeed more peaceful and has lesser problems and everyone is enjoying themselves in this new world, save for the people who have memories of the old world who are suffering instead...

but as nene expressed, it was important to both her and us readers

and from here it's like she's not giving up on it, even if it's been causing her so much problems

she's giving her best to nurture and fix it, or at least make it bloom a flower, to at least have one good thing come out from all this struggle

sighhhh aidairo loves bittersweet pain.. everyone else is happy or just content but my girl nene just can't catch a break

the only plus in this new present is this yuri scene <3

aonene my beloved 🙏

[gofishygo]

i had a thought about marine life cod something something sighhhh and now i wanna draw them. all of them.

the first thing i thought of was vampire squid!konig.... you get what i see right, or like, he could be some other (massive) squid

gaz reminds me of a nurse shark.. number one, they're cute and look sweet, number two they look awfully boopable🎀🎀 there's no number three but just look at pictures of them that's literally gaz

soap would be a ray maybe?? specifically a spotted eagle ray. he could be a narwhal too because they're silly <3

phantom jellyfish!ghost obviously!!!

i'm thinking price could be a whale, but i'm not sure what yet? i;m so indecisive... beluga!price or humpback whale!price, perhaps?

and nikolai is a pilot whale like are you joking

i have no ideas for the others yet sadly because i have a little pea brain, but ill probably come up with some things soon...

fellow anon, DRAW THEM . I LOVE MARINE LIFE COD AUS SO MUCH RRHHRHRHRHRHRHRHHRHRHRHRHHRHRHRHHRHRHRHRHRHHRHRHRHHRHRHRHH !!!!!!!!! please pleasep lease dra them if u have time ....... they give me brain juices... .. . .. .

yayaya !!!! konig could definetly be a vampire squid !! tbh ive always seen him as maybe under the octopoda order (mostly due to the insane amounts of cthulu nd octo konig in this fandom) but i can certainly see him as a vampire squid !!! he gives the vibes- generally trying to contain the power he has and not get unnecessary blood on his hands (vampire squids are detritivore) nd a lot less menacing than it seems . more of an avoidant personality as well !!

and YAYAYYYAYAYYA gas is definitely some type of less aggressive shark !!! honestly nurse shark matches him the best but i occasionally believe he is a catshark or epaulette , they're easygoing and docile (IF UNPROVOKED) and so so cutie patootie i project my fav sharks on him bc he is my fav character

and soap does give ray vibes, but hear me out : eel soap >!?!! especially variants that hunt via electricity (like him !! but he uses bombs that arent necessarily IEDs but SAME THING) and r super duper energetic a lot , but oh em gee,,,,,,, he would make such a good spotted eagle ray .....

ok we all agree on phantom jelly ghost its cannon guys he is literally the big mysterious jelly

and price , although i like to think of him as a great white (better dynamics w/ other characters), he honestly would match a lot of species of whale much better . i forgot the name of this species specifically , but i do believe it was some type of bleaked whale ?? they scar white from injuries over time, and have a long lifespan . most of them will turn white over their lifespan due to the injuries that they get, and i think that does go after price's military career and how his scars the events he's lived through have sort of become part of him (ghost could definitely be this species too now i think about it), and how he's lived past points where his allies have fallen .

OK NIK AS A PILOT WHALE . YEYSYYEYS THATS FUNNY AS FUCK HAIJASHFKFH

i would like to think that laswell would be some form of species of whale , maybe one that is intelligent and capable of many forms of mutalism relationships due to her being ... yknow .... insanely based ....

makarov would be an orca. highly intelligent, only realised to be extremely dangerous once studied. ganging up on every fucking fish in the world. capable of competing with other apex predators like great whites.

graves.... unpopular opinion, but he is a stonefish . sneaky bastard and incredibly fucking dangerous . but stupid looking and a silly skrumkle very much so .

nyways i am too tired to think but i will go to sleep dreaming of the 141 eating salmon tonight ......... thank u very mysterious but very lovely fishy anon ...........

[sebsxphia]

Sebbbb! My love <3 how are you??? :) I’m currently having very feral thots about Jake loving to fuck his pregnant wife in front of a mirror 😵‍💫 him kneeling behind you on your shared bed with your back against his chest, strong arms wrapped around you, big hands squeezing your sensitive breasts and relishing in the desperate whimpers he’s able to pull from your lips, before he’s moving them down to caress and hold your bump to relieve some of the pressure on your back. His chin resting over your shoulder as the two of you watch yourselves in the mirror, eyes flickering between where Jake’s cock is filling you up oh so deliciously, and your pleasure-wrought faces. Jake leaving trails of little kisses along your cheek, your jaw, your neck, in between whispering the filthiest sweet nothings into your ear the entire time like,

“Look at my beautiful wife, all full of me”

“Takin’ me so well, honey”

“Look so gorgeous carrying our baby”

“Can’t wait til’ this baby’s here so I can give you another one”

bc you just know that Jake has a breeding kink and is absolutely feral for his wifey, and he’s going to worship her like a goddess bc he just loves seeing her pregnant with their baby

Alsoooo, a little bonus thot: I feel like if your baby was overdue, Jake would absolutely be the type to joke with you about having sex to induce labor (he’s not joking 🫠)

Sighhhh it’s actually so rude that Jake Seresin is not my husband bc I need him so bad !! 😭 I hope you’re having a wonderful day, my dear Seb, ilysm!! mwah! 🥰💗💕💜💕💗

- @sugarcoated-lame 💗🧡💗

@sugarcoated-lame

“Look at my beautiful wife, all full of me”

“Can’t wait til’ this baby’s here so I can give you anther one”

I’M LOOSING IT KRICKET, LOOOOOSING IT!

no because you’re so incredibly right with this my love! jake loves having sex with you in front of mirrors because it plays into his exhibitionism kink, and because he loves seeing you all stretched around his cock too, especially with your belly swollen with his cum 🥴

oh, but you know that this postion feels so incredibly good for you, as you lean back against his chest and he takes the weight by lifting your bump. you’re letting out these pretty pornographic moans as you feel the weight lift slightly. your aches disappear and your clit throbs as the tip of his cock pushes against your sweet spot.

if and when you’re overdue, and you need jake’s help, he’s got you on your back, or side, due to not being able to hold yourself up much more. but his large hands are firmly holding your stomach and releasing some of that ache. to be honest kricket, it is actually so rude that he’s not our husband!

thank you so much for this incredibly delicious thot my love and i hope you’re having the most wonderful day my angel! ilysm, MWAH 🥹🥰💗🫶🏻

[whatmitskisongarethey]

Next up is Arthur Morgan! Sorry in advance for the yap fest. Also, my asks should be open now!!! I didn’t realize I had them closed before lol. Feel free to send in characters!!!

I’ve assigned him Cop Car!

(Heavy Spoilers for Red Dead 2 below!!! Please play the game it’s great!! You have been warned!!)

This is one of Mitski’s songs that start out quiet but gradually ramp up until it’s loud. There’s something a bit different about this one that really makes me connect it to Arthur. Mitski makes use of a droning violin which, at least to me, creates an anxiety-inducing experience. Accompanied by the gradual chaos of the song and how it slowly gets louder, it really creates an interesting sound. The song is reminiscent of the downfall of the Van Der Linde gang, at least to me.

Things had started out simple for the gang, but small things began to snowball, much like the instruments do in the song. The same might be said for Arthur. He starts out a simple person, but through small experiences, he changes, for better or worse depending on your ending. The beauty of Red Dead, at least for me, is that with any character there isn’t really one “thing” that shows their change- rather, it is the culmination of all their actions and words that show it.

Anyway! Lyrical analysis!

Sighhhh. Mitski and her repetition! I would interpret the first two lines (“I get mean when I’m nervous, like a bad dog”) as being Arthur trying to justify his bad behavior. He’s nervous that the people he loves will end up hurt if he isn’t ‘mean’, so he has to go out and commit these crimes. The obvious connection with ‘like a bad dog’ is to the wolf imagery we see with the low honor ending. However, I raise you this: what are dogs most known for? Their loyalty. Who is Arthur loyal to? The gang. He’s loyal to Dutch to an absolute fault. Like a dog, he follows Dutch’s orders, even when Dutch abandons him. With this interpretation, Arthur getting ‘mean’ when he’s nervous could be him going against Dutch because he fears- and ultimately knows- that his plans won’t work out.

I interpret the next three lines (“I want to jump into blue water - And I miss riding horses, I miss running fast”) as Arthur missing when things were simpler. Before the Pinkertons, before Dutch’s plans. This could also be Arthur feeling that he misses his freedom out in the country, where there weren’t so many towns and lawmen.

The second to last line (“I was meant for running fast”) speaks to who Arthur feels he is. He was meant to be an outlaw. This is only exemplified by the next line (“I pretended you were mine, it made me calm babe”). This line speaks to his relationship with Mary Linton. He can pretend to be someone she can be with, but he isn’t. He can dream of a life with her, but he’d never be willing to leave his life behind, so those dreams can never become a reality.

The next two lines (“I am cruel, I am gentle, I can make you laugh”) is kind of a surface level look at Arthur’s character. He’s cruel. He does cruel things, no matter what honor level you have. But he also has the capacity to be gentle. He can make you laugh- he cracks jokes all the time and lightens up an otherwise semi-serious game. But is this all there is to Arthur?

I think not! The next line (“I’ve loved many boys, I’ve loved many girls”) not only cements my headcannon that Arthur is bisexual but also reveals to us that he cares about many people. That’s why he can be cruel. That’s why he cracks jokes. Because he’s a person who loves too much.

The next two lines (“I don’t think about the past, it’s always there anyway - Don’t think about the past, always there anyway”) are very foreboding. During the latter half of the high honor ending, Arthur is essentially trying to undo his past. He’s trying not to think about it and only focusing on what he can do now, not to redeem himself, but to try and do good by the people he’s hurt. This line also works for low honor, since he’s not thinking his past, because it’s ‘always there anyway’. It’s always been a part of him.

Yikes. If you’ve played the game I think you can guess where this is going!

These next few lines (“I will never die”) can be interpreted as Arthur being in denial of his incoming death, but I took it a different way. In the game, we see that Arthur is only afraid of death because he’s going to die without truly having believed in anything. He then realizes, through his last few actions, that his kindness will live on through others. Thus, he will never truly die.

I struggle with these last few lines (“I’ve preemptively blocked all the exits - So I will burn this movie theatre, hey”). I ultimately spun it as Arthur’s final stand, in a way. In the low honor ending, this is him letting his bad behavior consume him. Burning in the movie theatre. In the high honor ending, this is Arthur making sure that everyone in the gang gets out, but going down with the ship himself, blocking all the exits.

My second and third choices for Mr. Morgan:

Thank you for reading! Do y’all agree with my choice? Let me know! Have a great day and remember that I love you <3

[taegularities]

Now now now that the L word is out 😭😭 when they fck or make love, jk’s gonna be 😭😭😭 “love you so fucking much baby.” while staring into her eyes and he’s deep inside 🙊🙊🤤

well… 😳 ah how i wish i could tell you about all the ways in which he'll be using that word… sigh sigh sighhhh

[riverdale-retread]

Riverdale s7 e1

There is a lot of commentary about whether the show is bad or good, and among those who hold that it's bad, a debate about whether said badness is intentional (It's camp! It's satire! It's  commentary on culture and/or our times!) or brought about from a lack of talent or planning by the producers, writers and/or actors.

What I say is this - I love the care with which Riverdale is made.  Starting with the S7 opening sequence!!

Archie’s painted hot rod is shown, then as the song plays Archie spins into view, his face framed in a little circle. He's doing something with his eyebrows. His smile is just a little off. Not a LOT off. Just off.  Immediately after that we see him press a kiss to Mary Andrews' cheek. We know it's all wrong because Mary Andrews is wary of the violence of this son that she regrets mothering and can't wait to get rid of.  They are not this affectionate.

Next up is Betty Cooper, short hair in the cutest ringlets, smiling sweetly, looking wholesome.  Betty Cooper found the pressure to be sweetly wholesome unbearably suffocating all six seasons of this show.  Immediately after her is Veronica with the most spectacular bangs,  looking pretty and hard and insincere.  These are things that Veronica hates to be thought of as.  

Then comes Cheryl, severely annoyed to be there, giving an evil eyed false smile.  Assuming arguendo that this is Jughead as world-maker as well as narrator, the fact that Cheryl gets to have a do-over of her intro in the montage, a doubling-up if you will, is noteworthy.  Everyone else gets the one shot in the juke box, but Cheryl gets a twofer, wearing the Lolita-Grundy sunglasses and pouting over the door of a great looking convertible. Kevin, looking gormless is up next and it makes me feel worried. Toni Topaz is looking ultra heterosexual with her long ponytail up-do. She winks at the  audience.  This is not edgy Serpent Queen Toni at all. But she and Veronica both look spectacular with bangs.  Tabitha in white cats’ eye glasses and white gloves, blows a kiss to the audience, looking sheltered and innocent when we all know she's a weirdo and not above cosplaying a truck stop hooker to catch a killer.  

The only person who looks like "himself" is Jughead, who comes last.  Worried, frantic, concerned and unhappy - basically, fail-adult Jughead without Tabitha.  Poor Jughead.

The year, he says, is 1955 and apparently people didn't mind when couples executed complicated dances involving swirling skirts inside a diner where people are trying to eat.  Jughead is narrating as he clatters away on a huge typewriter at the Diner.  Apparently the patrons don't mind that either. Does he keep it there?  Did he commandeer the one in the office?? Does he haul it around??

As Jughead narrates, speculating about where he is - Not sure if he's in the past or the past of an alternate universe -  he speaks faster and more frantically, sounding more and more like Bunker Jughead of Rivervale.  He tries to sound unhappy about living in a railcar with Hot Dog (". . . which actually tracks" sighhhh) but we all know he's relieved he's not homeless and couch surfing. Having a dog and a residence of his own is more stability than he's had since graduating high school and before Jabitha began cohabitation.

They're all juniors in high school again!  Betty and Kevin holding hands down the hallway, Betty in excellent patterned pants with eyes only for Kevin who won't look at her.  Jughead looks at the two of them with an expression of suppressing in indigestion burp but neither notice him.  Jughead is worried for Betty, all the time, nonstop, in every universe.  Plus Bughead were the horniest little fuckers in any high school on American television ever, and so the fact of Betty dating a gay man worries Jughead.  He doesn’t want to have sex with her anymore, yet Jughead wants Betty to have good things.  And Jughead has never liked Kevin much, but he’s worried for Kevin too. Betty wasn’t and isn’t a girl who takes not getting her way with grace.

Cheryl still has a twin brother, but she is completely not at all in love with this one.  The face she makes is not of a girl dominating the halls of her high school with her soulmate.  Jughead feels very similar about this iteration of a Boy Blossom, noting first and foremost that this kiddo is Cheryl’s twin, then second that he is not Jason, before introducing us to his actual name: Julian.

Julian like the possessed doll, the chimera twin that got eaten by Cheryl in the womb, etc, that Julian. Who actually knew this Julian name, other than Toni?  

Jughead’s thoughts turn directly from Cheryl to Not-Jason to Reggie then on to Archie.  This is the first of several pings back to earlier seasons, which I am sure I’m not going to be able to catch in a perfect way.  But!  Reggie and Jason were constantly in each other’s company in Jughead’s hallucinatory reminiscences of Jason during S1, even though Reggie barely ever mentioned Jason, and Cheryl has never been shown actually discussing Jason with either Reggie 1.0 or 2.0.

The key thing that Jughead notices about Archie is his body, in the same way the key thing he notices about Julian is that he is not Jason.  Archie being wholesome enough to kiss his mom on the cheek goodbye every morning being into body building in 1955 is very progressive (and gay) of him, isn’t it?  That sort of muscular build was still sort of a niche thing, I thought.

Jughead has been frowning at all these people for quite a while, long enough to confirm that they have no recollection of their S6 selves.  He hasn’t seen Tabitha, who he helpfully explains is chronokinetic and the town’s literal guardian angel AND his girlfriend.

Just in time, Pop Tate announces that the bus from Mississippi has arrived.  Tabitha, looking very sad, is accompanied by Toni, equally sad, and a third person, who I assumed was Chuck even though the actor has changed because that wouldn’t be Munroe.  Sadness from having to witness an act of racial injustice and hatred makes people move in slow motion into the Diner.

Jughead watches Tabitha slowly walk past him before he calls her name.  The way he says “Tabitha” is so cautious, because she might reject any conversation with the guy wearing a bulky sweater with the S stamped on it AND a felt crown making very loud tappity tap noises at her grandfather’s diner, and hopeful, because maybe they’re friends, and maybe hearing Jughead will make this Tabitha remember season 6.  The guarded, questioning response he gets from her makes Jughead change tack fast, to discuss the Emmett Till hearing verdict as something he heard “on the radio.”   When Jughead says the verdict made him “sick to my stomach” Tabitha frowns slightly, wary of where he might go with this, perhaps.   Tabitha saying that she and her friends are trying to figure out what they should do next, Jughead isn’t even breathing.  He’s watching her so hard, so hopeful that Tabitha will give him some hint that she knows this is the wrong universe, and so worried she might not.

When she asks him to confirm that his name is Jughead in a way that indicates they aren’t even friends in this universe, Jughead is so hurt that his drops out of his careful, speak-in-full-sentences 1950s speech, and stutters.  His eyes get much, much sadder, right before he says it’s overwhelming and heartbreaking.  He looks like he might cry.   Poor Jughead.  

The cruelty of his fate is astounding.  He was a kid who was left behind and rejected by his mother, let to live homeless by his father, rejected by Fred Andrews, routinely forgotten by his girlfriend during what he thought of as their shared childhood memories, and now, the singularly stable adult friendship and relationship of his life is like it never existed.  Jughead Jones is someone who hasn’t ever been without a girlfriend, it seems since starting one with Betty Cooper, but now when he needs a relationship the most, Tabitha literally doesn’t know him.

Simply because Tabitha Tate doesn’t know him, Jughead hates everything about the 1950s. (Whoever said the 1950s was the greatest decade should have their head examined, he deadpans.)

Archie is trying to skip out of the house when Mary calls to him.  Archie grimaces so hard at his mother’s summons that I can see it through the back of his head.  This did give me a small twinge of hope that maybe he does remember S1-6, and that Archie is putting on this wholesome teenager act, same as Jughead, until he can figure out what’s going on.  He puts on an evidently false face of doe-eyed innocence when he gets it together to go talk to his mother. He’s literally never made that face before in the past six years.

Mary Andrews is very upset about the photos of James Dean’s car accident in the papers, so she confiscates the keys to Archie’s “hotrod” with “fire painted on its sides.” Archie tries to talk his way out of this but fails.  He longingly looks at his “barely above a jalopy” vehicle before turning to face the reality of having to take a very old looking bicycle to school.

Archie has never been this cute to me. His little face!   Then he’s peddling uphill, getting honked at, and so mad .  Just, adorable.  I wanna give him a cookie.   He gets to school just in time.

Meanwhile, Betty in her very excellent 1950s pants is sitting with Toni in the Blue and Gold room.  Her sweater says Betty on it in a curly font.  With her short blonde curls framing her sweet face Betty looks picture perfect. She and Toni both have such enormous eyes that I keep getting distracted from the serious topic they are discussing - how to get past the school censors to properly cover the Emmett Till travesty.  When Betty says she will throw her weight behind getting the story told, Toni smiles at her in a small cheek scrunching way that she’s never done before.  She looks amazing, by the way - the bangs, the big hoop earrings, the scarf /headband thing in her hair, the Southside Serpent Jeans jacket.

Cut to a class where a 1950s tv announcer voice is explaining what a mill is (a souped up hot rod or jalopy) in a film the class are watching  when the principal (Warden Norton repurposed as Principal Featherhead!) bursts in to make an announcement.  Archie is wearing an R sweater, with Jughead in the S sweater seated nearby.

What do these mean??

Veronica make an iconic entrance, complete with heralding blues horns.  Yellow heels, yellow belt, black dress with white polka dots, black purse,  sunglasses, big black sunhat trimmed with the same fabric as her dress, and red lips.  Lace gloves with little black polka dots.

OMG SHE LOOKS SO HOT.

I want this whole thing.  I make a vow to only wear yellow heels with black dresses.

Archie, getting his first look, drops his pencil.  (Kevin, right behind him, has no reaction whatsoever.)  Jughead, Tabitha-less, looks constipated as he notes:  “Damn.”

Girl, that’s what I said!

With everyone else in some sort of sweater or jacket, buttoned up to the neck, Veronica’s plunging neckline and sleeveless dress makes her look practically naked.   She’s a Hollywood scion - Hermione and Hiram have “Amercia’s number one rated television program,” and of course they’re going to call it, Oh Mija!

I LOVED this in-joke, because it functions as a tribute to Hiram.  Mija was the word he said the most, after, maybe, Archie.

For some reason, this whole situation - Veronica’s appearance, introduction, presence and existence- piss Cheryl off entirely.  She is huffing, rolling her eyes, and generally extremely antsy.

Seated right behind her, Archie is just in heaven. Veronica is being very alternative-universe here: her self introduction is very pompous.  Real Veronica Lodge actually hates pomposity.  Her vocabulary is still very Jughead-huge though (“opportune” and “raven haired.”)  Veronica says that she’s trying a method acting type of thing (de rigueur for the age perhaps - another thing she might actually say) of experiencing small town life so she can better portray the “innocent ingenue” in the upcoming production of “Our Town.”

Longtime viewers are meant to know that she is lying about staying with an aunt-and-uncle, mostly because these people have never been introduced in the past six seasons.  As far as we’ve ever been told about Hiram in the competing lores of his life, he doesn’t have siblings. We have almost no lore about Hermione, other than FP hit on her almost once in high school and she had the affair with Fred Andrews as an adult.

Both Cheryl and Betty do not like that Veronica called them “small town lifers” basically.   Archie is entirely entranced with her, laughing at every little joke that Veronica makes, and even Cheryl pointedly turning in her seat to glare at him can’t make his besotted grin falter even a little bit.  

Veronica purrs and preens when she calls herself “the scion of Tinseltown royalty.”  I’m surprised she doesn’t roll her Rs.  When she winsomely says Thank You, Archie, whose face has been lit up like a christmas tree this whole time, bursts into solitary applause.   Cheryl is still very mad, but Archie gets rewarded with an extremely sexy wink by Veronica for being such an immediate fan.  

Is that a blush I see on Archie’s face?

I love this Archie. He’s so cute.

The table that Veronica chooses to try to join is Cheryl, Betty,  Kevin, Julian and Archie.  This is a weird fricking cluster of people.  Cheryl and Betty? And what the heck would Kevin and Julian have in common?   When Veronica asks to sit, Cheryl wants to say no but she is betrayed by both of the other redheads, who clear the space immediately.  Veronica comes to perch gracefully between the two redhead boys.  

Veronica says she caught all their names in the class they were just in.  Of course, Betty having BETTY embroidered into her sweater probably helps with that too.   Remembering that the R wearing Archie is Archie might be more of a feat.   Veronica shows that she took Cheryl’s eye rolls to heart by pointedly asking Cheryl what her name was.  Cheryl is extremely displeased, yet again.   This seems to know exactly what just happened between Veronica and Cheryl- he is trying very hard not to laugh too much.

Cheryl tries to explain that that they’d been discussing James Dean’s death, very self-importantly adding that she is president of his fanclub, when she gets undermined by Julian, who interrupts with a very weak joke about the Oh Mija! show being “high-larious,” to Veronica.   He says that the Blossoms “tune in every week” which must be a lie, because Cheryl’s whole face sours.  Betty and Kevin seem like they’re on the same wavelength.  They project the same calm, almost bovine energy when they ask Veronica where she lived in LA (BelAir) and if she knew James Dean.

Cheryl sharply tells Kevin off for being “so provincial,” then goes off to sideways disparage Veronica by implying that she wasn’t important enough to be a friend of James Dean, a person who was friends with Elizabethe Taylor.   Turns out Veronica Lodge was ‘friendly’ with Jimmy, “friendly” enough to go skinny dipping together at the Chateau Marmaduke (standing in for Chateau Marmont).  

This makes Archie choke.  Literally.  He focuses on “skinny dipping” -Veronica! Naked! She does Naked things! - while Betty and Kevin (Bevin? Ketty??) are entranced about being that friendly with James Dean.  Julian is more in Archie’s camp - he wants to know if Veronica has done the naked thing once or more than once.  I so appreciate the asshole energy that Julian projects nonstop.  He reminds me a lot of Bret Weston Wallis that way. You know on sight that he’s a dickhead, which is 180 degrees different from the angelic way that Jughead used to hallucinate Jason.

When Cheryl plays with her hair to sarcastically ask if Veronica will claim that she had dated Jimmy Dean, Veronica says no, but then drops a bombshell.  James Dean “played both sides of the net.”  In case the small town rubes don’t get her meaning, Veronica clarifies that this means both girls and boys.  Kevin has a milder version of Archie’s choking reaction from seconds before at this thought.  He’s smiling, and Betty is frowning.  Oh?  Oh???

When Kevin wants Veronica to name what James Dean was, Archie interrupts. This made me wonder if there  was a 1950s term for bisexual, that everyone would’ve known, that you can say on a CW show in 2023?    I guess not because Kevin never gets to finish his question.

Archie has a confused reaction, which fits canon so far and why Jarchie hasn’t happened yet even though it should.  He finds the concept of regular guys who are almost cowboys (all American? Is that what he means to say?) being anything other than 100% proof heterosexual incomprehensible.  Cheryl reacts with homophobic anger - it’s besmirchment, it’s foul, to say Jimmy Dean was not straight.   When Veronica calls her provincial, Cheryl slut shames her.  Nobody cares that Cheryl has flounced off, so now Kevin wants to know about Sal Mineo.

Kevin is definitely not straight in this universe.  Veronica knows it, apparently immediately. Poor Betty.

In science class later that day we see ETHEL is Jughead’s lab desk partner. Jughead is miserable to be back in high school.  He has an Asian American science teacher, who wears nerdy round glasses and has a bit of a lisp.  The teacher says Bailey Comet is due to arrive in two years.   He sounds vaguely Singporean, his teacher.  

Cut to Cheryl screaming GUYS as she floats in the air, trying to ice the comet.

Cut to the end of school, where Archie winsomely offers Veronica an escort home.  He has no ride, however, and Veronica isn’t the type of girl to walk. (She also just can’t, not in those high heels.)  Julian has offered Veronica a ride, ditching his sister wholesale.  JASON WOULD NEVER. Archie and Cheryl can’t bear to look at each other in the face of this rejection they’ve suffered.

In the waning light, Betty and Veronica are trying to talk to two old white men.  Dupont from Stonewall is here in Riverdale now as Werther a ‘child psychiatrist’ who fully backs Warden, I mean Principal, Featherhead that the Emmett Till murder and trial are not suitable subject matter for the school paper.

Toni tries to advocate for publication by saying that people need to know what happened “so that it doesn’t happen again.”  That is so adorable and incorrect.  Knowing something terrible happened again does not in any way ensure that it doesn’t keep happening.  I think the better way to think about it is, We owe it to the wronged to mark their stories.  Featherhead shoots her down by saying that “these sorts of things don’t happen in Riverdale.”  He also says a wrong thing - that “change doesn’t happen overnight.” Actually all change happens overnight.  That’s where there’s always a backlash to any progress, because those who can’t keep up want to turn it back. A lot of the time, they succeed.  In any case, Featherstone patronizes Toni by telling her take satisfaction in how ‘well written’ in article is.

Later, at family dinner in which Polly and Charles don’t exist, Betty tries to push her parents into reading Toni’s article on the air at their nightly broadcast on RIVW.  15 minutes is what they get, of which Toni’s article would take a whole minute.   Hal’s 50s persona is very hilarious.  He looks extremely shifty and chipunky, reminding me quite a lot of Peter Pettigrew of all things.  Alice has absolutely killer eyebrows, sharp enough to slice your face open.   They both repeat Featherstone’s line about the article being ‘well written’ but have no intention of rocking the boat.   Betty is angry but she is overruled by the power of the Blossom money and her parents not wanting to upset their only sponsor.

1950s Archie is still the cutest.  He is working his car, underneath it, as he breathlessly narrates his ove for Veronica Lodge.  He actually says SHAZAM!  persuasively.  Hit with a thunderbolt indeed.  He’s so 1950s in fact that the things he says and the way he says them feel suspicious too perfect. “How’s a guy like me gonna get anywhere with a girl like Veronica Lodge” and so  forth.  Jughead is perched like a depressed crow in his S sweater that seems to get darker and darker as the day goes on, looking off to the side and not listening to this earnest puppy love talk.

Jughead’s narration takes over. He is just so anxious.  He’s talking so fast, thinking about Bailey’s Comet, trying to harness that to get back to the future. “But I needed [ pause ] help.”  He sounds increasingly like the wigged out Bunker Jug of Rivervale.  Archie asks for his dad’s hammer, which sets off Jughead’s memory - that Archie buried the hammer in the time capsule.

The capsule they buried in the year 2020 when they graduated from high school, not to be confused with the year 2020 when they were 6 years after graduating from high school, might still be in existence in 1955 even though they were sent ‘back’ to this time from the first but not the second 2020.

Jughead seems to think this is a logical leap and I am very tickled. I kind of find it annoying (sorry, anti-intellectualism incoming, mea culpa in advance) when time travel stories get too precious about theoretical physics, so this made me very pleased with the wild swings they take in narrative on Riverdale.

So! Jughead asks for a shovel to Archie, who gives him an odd look. Is it because Archie thinks “Can I borrow a shovel?” is a really weird response to “Have you seen my dad’s hammer?” or is it because Archie knows something?

Later that night, Jughead is digging something out of the ground again. Grave robbery is one of his leitmotifs, I suppose?   He hits something hard, and guess what! It’s the time capsule.  Jughead is out of breath as he says “Thank God” but he seems just as frantic and scared as before.  And dun dun!! Someone is watching him do all this from the shadows!  The hairline looks vaguely like Tabitha.

Veronica is going to school the next day, wearing  more modest neckline and weather appropriate warm clothes.   Archie has somehow gotten his car out of the garage, so now he’s able to offer her a ride home. She’s very pleased, but Jughead walks right in between the two of them, carrying the time capsule ice box. Summarily, he insists that the two of them come meet him in the music room. Veronica has no idea who he is.

In the music room, they’re all holding their 2020 self’s contribution to the time capsule.  Toni has never seen the Pretty Poisons jacket.  Veronica thinks the Pop’s menu is an only passable prop.  Betty finds the headlines to be “like Dr. Seuss” meaning amusing gibberish, perhaps?   And Kevin keeps asking unanswerable questions - he wants to know what the “inch” is in Hedwig and the Angry Inch.  Archie wants to know when Jughead buried Fred’s hammer in a cooler.

Jughead tackles that one first, saying “YOU did.”  Archie genuinely looks like he has no idea what Jughead’ is talking about, but I’ve sussed it out now - 1950s Archie’s response to confusion is to smile about it. So he smiles.  Jughead can see that his attempt to “shake something loose” in his friends’ minds isn’t working, so in his frustration, his presentation starts to get very garbled.  He tells them they buried all these things 67 years ago IN THE FUTURE which, given the tenses, doesn’t even amount to English.   He says they need to get back to ‘our present, our future’ before full on stuttering.  Betty is concerned, Cheryl is annoyed, Toni and Kevin look embarrassed for Jughead, Archie is smiling because he’s confused.  Veronica, however, is very entertained.  

Archie wants to know what Jughead buried.  Jughead knows it was his “yarn beanie” but then says it wasn’t in the time capsule.  For some reason, this takes the fun out of this exercise for Archie, the fact that Jughead didn’t include an item of his own in the ‘cooler.’

Veronica says she’ll play along, and asks if she or Elizabeth Taylor is more famous in the future.  Cheryl, not to be outdone, cuts in with a request to give a bird’s eye view of the future.  Jughead has not thought this far in advance, so his answer is (adorably) piss poor.  he just throw things out - smartphones,  text messages, spotify, the internet - in THAT order which is the most confusing thing of all time.  Betty tries to help him out since he’s getting frantic during this speech that makes no sense to her - she asks Jughead to describe everyone’s Season 6 selves.

Jughead’s summaries are as follows:  Archie was in the army, fought in a war. Betty was in FBI hunting serial killers.  The way Betty practically salivates at the word serial killer, which doesn’t exist as a word yet, is VERY interesting.  Veronica owns a casino, and before that a speakeasy.  Toni bought the speakeasy, turned it into a biker bar.  Both Veronica and Toni are charmed by this story.  

Jughead positively chokes when he tries to summarize Kevin’s life.  He can tell, by this time, that this is going very sideways, which won’t be helped by how out of sorts Kevin’s life became by the end of Season 6.  Kevin is summarized as directing some musicals, after which he joined an organ harvesting cult.  Not wrong, but not very fulsome.  Cheryl, Jughead says, was possessed by an ancestor and became a witch.  She is not a happy customer, at all.

Archie says a fascinating thing- that he wouldn’t want to go back to the future because “we” sound miserable. Well, given that he was just told he joined the army and went to war, this is true for him, but not all the futures are miserable.

Veronica wants to know how the whole ‘going back to the future’ thing will happen, to which Jughead’s entire presentation falls completely apart. When he says that one of the ways might be a comet, Toni (who has tried very hard to be polite so far) gives a What the fuck look to Betty, who answers it with a Oh he’s just like this smile.   Jughead is fully in frantic world-maintainer Bunker Jughead mode now, and starts shouting about having Archie and Betty make out on Archie’s bed and then “BLOW  UP A BOMB UNDERNEATH THEM.”

This is so funny. I love with Jughead gets all Bunker-Jug, with the shouting and the extreme hand gestures. Is he perhaps channeling Hiram??

Everyone thinks this is very funny, but Archie has had enough.  Archie tries to make Jughead ‘take five’ which puts Jughead fully into feral motormouth mode to ask “YOU’RENOTGONNABEATMEUPAREYOUCUZYOU’REREALLYVIOLENTINTHEFUTURE”

The whole sentence is spit out as one long word.

When the two of them are alone in the gym, Archie lets it rip.  “People are going to think you belong in the looney bin with the other nutjobs!” and “It’s hard enough without your crazy stories” etc.  Jughead is coming down from his frantic mania so being called a ‘nut job’ is not helping.  His eyes actually start to glisten with tears.  “You think I’m crazy?” he asks, in a more normal, much sadder cadence.   Jughead is so upset, and so lonely, and so despairing.

This is a big change from his mid teens, when he took on being not understood, being isolated, unique and alone, as a badge of honor.  This Jughead understands the horror of being trapped in a solitary reality.  He can’t even stand to look at Archie, because that would mean confronting how trapped and alone he actually is in this universe.  Archie tries to be kind, telling him to keep using his ‘overactive’ imagination by channeling that energy into creating fiction.  When Jughead gives up altogether, and agrees, Archie actually skips a couple steps (something he’s never done in any of the other universes) before leaving Jughead standing in the gym.

At the very red, very depressing Blossom mansion, Penelope, who has the most fascinating hairdo (it’s both ornate and simple, hideous and perfectly coiffed) while dressed like the nightmare camp version of the English queen wants to know why  her twins look so sullen.  The way the Blossom twins of this universe bicker seems much more realistic, and, accordingly, much more dull.   I think this is post facto validation for the way the Cheryl-Jason relationship is in the S1-6 canon. It’s so much more interesting than this mundanity between Julian and Cheryl.

Penelope delivers movie magazines to Cheryl, and on the cover is someone not Veronica Lodge being cast in Our Town!

Meanwhile, Veronica is on a date with Archie at Pop’s!  She loves the food. All her attempts to make lighthearted conversation with Archie fail.  He has no idea who Gloria Swanson is.  This literally breaks Veronica’s spirit.   So she changes her line of questioning - “Tell me everything there is to know about Archie Andrews.”

His life is so boring.  “Work on my car. I like sports. I come here to pops. And i hangout at sweet water river.  mostly to fish.”

Then Archie reveals that Fred didn’t make it back from the Korean War, making him one of the 33,000 American servicemen who died.  Thank you Fred Andrews for your service, I guess? I’m slightly peeved that they didn’t make up a different war like they did for Archie to go fight in during the 2020 that lasted for seven years, but then they used the real Emmett Till story so they might as well use the Korean War, I suppose.  Archie is very used to people being upset about having asked, as well as not knowing what to say, so he is very smooth in the way he assures Veronica that “It’s OK” when she tries to apologize for prying.   In this universe, Mary Andrews works part time at the dress shop (no lawyering for her, alas).   I’m shocked she doesn’t work at Pop’s.  Though I guess maybe this economy is better.

Archie has never had a serious girlfriend by his Junior year of HS, about which Veronica is shocked.  Two days after meeting Veronica and in the course of their first real date, Archie more or less says that he wants to be Veronica’s boyfriend. He looks so starry eyed at her, that Veronica is extremely charmed. (So am I.)

But Veronica can’t be let to have nice things, so in comes Cheryl, shouting “J’accuse!”  Cheryl hates Veronica SO MUCH.  Just the ad hominem insults - “lying liar of a spoiled brat” and “banished by your parents!”  - and she insists on shouting the fact that Veronica employed a bit of puffery when she was introducing herself to the class.  

At the Pembroke, Veronica is weeping while consoled by Archie.  Archie tries to say nobody takes Cheryl seriously  Veronica fesses up that she was in fact banished, and she was a problem for her parents.   Veronica says she was ignored and sidelined since the Lodges started Oh Mija!  This is fascinating actually because Veronica’s persistent problem during her high school years was that both her parents were completely obsessed with her- and when she acquired a hitherto unknown older sibling halfway through her years in high school, Hermosa exhibited the same Lodge trait - obsession with Veronica, wanting to love her, wanting and willing to shoot at people on her behalf, and hating her just the little bit.  Now, in this universe, she’s an inconvenient burden neither parents cares much about - which indicates that Veronica was so the object of her parents’ focus because the two of them didn’t have sufficient creative outlets.  “The show is their real baby, not me.”    

This happened in a slower way during S5-6.  When Hiram finally, FINALLY killed off Riverdale and began his SoDale giant real estate project, he stopped being as invested in Veronica per se.  And when Hermione found the semi-acting gig of being a “Real Housewife,” she disappeared entirely out of Veronica’s life.

It turns out Veronica’s deep dark secret, the thing that got her banished to Riverdale by her parents, was that she was in fact tangentially involved in James Dean’s death.  She was one of several good time girls who formed a sort of racing fandom for Dean, and were going to meet him to cheer him on during a race.  

After consoling Veronica, Archie gets home late, to be immediately yelled at by Mary.  Mary is traumatized by the loss of Fred Andrews - which she honestly wasn’t very much in S4-6. Maybe this is why, if he does remember, Archie prefers to stay in this universe.    He has a mom who cares deeply that his father died.  Mother and son bond over their shared loss.  The compromise is that Archie is allowed to drive as long as his car goes very, very slow.  I will also note that his question about how he took HIS car out in a drive is a very unteenager thing to say.  So the question remains - what does Archie know or sense about this alternate universe?

In a fit of masochism, Veronica watches her parents’ show.  The kid cast to play the Mija is Tillie Temple (aka Shirley Temple, perhaps??).  Veronica hates Tilie.  Of course, right now is when Hermione calls.   Turns out someone is keeping a strict eye on the guests that Veronica has over at the apartment.  Veronica wants to go home for Thanksgiving, but Hermione doesn’t say she can come.  She has Orson Welles visiting.  Veronica is so lonely.   This is also new for Veronica - Maternal rejection has never been her problem.  That was usually reserved for Jughead, Cheryl and to a lesser extent, Betty and Archie.

Betty reads the Emmett Till newsletter which show the pictures of what Till went through.  It radicalizes Betty  into wanting to publish the article Toni wrote.  But Toni wants to read a poem out during the morning announcements. There’s an echo of the larger theme in S1 through 6 here.  In previous seasons, Cheryl took it upon herself to make up for her ancestor’s sins. In this one, Toni wants Cheryl to make it up to - who? Toni? the world? - someone for her parents’ cowardice in not wanting to cover the Till murder.   Toni is planning an ambush.

Tabitha immediately approaches Jughead She asks for help.  NAACP is taking Emmett Till’s mother on tour, so Tabitha is going with them.  What Tabitha needs someone to help her ‘stay on top of’ school while she is on this tour.  It’s really not clear to me what that will be, but Jughead - though he is crushed that this Tabitha doesn’t even seem to know him at all - agrees immediately.  His eyes get all sad again, as he looks with wistful tenderness at this person who is exactly like his girlfriend but isn’t, at all.   He smiles and says “Awesome!” which he corrects to “Swell.”

Meanwhile Toni ambushes Cheryl in the bathroom with Betty.  Cheryl doesn’t mind letting Toni borrow her platform, but points out that Featherhead has pulled the plug before.  For what, I wonder? When??  She’s otherwise very easily persuaded.

Tabitha has fainted, Featherhead is tending to her, Miss Bell is off, and so now, Toni can take over the morning announcement!

As Toni was reading the Langston Hughes poem I realized with the Rs and Ss stand for on those sweaters. R is for Riverdale.  A bunch of other students have Rs emblazoned on their sweaters and sweatshirts.  So the S must be for Southside.  Jughead wears a Southside High sweater all the time to attend Riverdale High, and they just let him!

So anyway Toni exhorts everyone to ‘talk to each other’ about it, and this is the third weird lie propagated in American society.  The emphasis on dialogue as somehow a catalyst for systemic change, which it is not

The four girls get a telling off from Featherhead, who tries to call them liars -but Tabitha has an answer for that (she felt sick! but felt better!) and insubordinate - but Cheryl has an answer for that (there has not been a rule that poetry can’t be read during the morning announcement or that they have to pass censorship).  

In the classroom later, the teacher does open up the discussion to the topic, but see, this is the problem.  It puts the burden on the three people of color - Tabitha, Toni, and the unnamed guy I have assumed is Chuck Clayton- to explain reality to everyone else, who can be passive recipients of information and responsible only for articulating their emotional responses.

Later that school day, Veronica is offered a ride by both Julian and Archie, and rejects them both in favor of walking home!

Late at night, Jughead is freaking out by himself in the diner, no typewriter.  He is cracking up.  Maybe seasons 1-6 were the dream and he finally woke up!!  

Tabitha slides into the booth and Glory Hallelujah it’s HIS Tabitha!  “The Tabitha who remembers and loves you.”  He reaches out to grasp her with both hands.  He’s so happy to see her, he says, covering his eyes with one hand, trying not to burst into tears.  Tabitha says that the comet hit because Cheryl failed, so they had their extinction level event  after all.  This isn’t the Sweet Hereafter.  She instead used her life force to send everyone back to 1955 to try to change the future.  She has to be ALONE to untangle all the messed up timelines.  “You have to make a go of it here in the 50s.”

So she parked Jughead here in 1955 to be safe, but because he kept remembering the actual reality (and could drive himself insane or further corrupt the safe timeline) she had to come back to make him forget, so that he can “live in the present, in the moment.”   Oh, but Tabitha.  Jughead was already so bad at that!  And now that’s his part of the mission? To hold it together without her while she fixes the universe?

Jabitha may be the MOST EPIC relationship in scale which doesn’t quite make up for the tiny amount of screen time we’re likely to get if Tabitha has decided that she has to solve this universe sized problem ALONE.  Jughead was willing to die a LOT.  Tabitha went through every single scenario where Jughead died to see how to make that not happen.  And now, Jughead is going to endure having the happiest time of his life wiped from memory - the time when he was a stable adult, who knew who he was in the world, when he was in a relationship and family unit of people who accepted him and supported him, when he had a real home - because Tabitha says it’s “for the best.”  He decides to trust her with erasing the thing that any of us hold the dearest - his memories that constitute his sense of self.   And can we talk about Tabitha’s self sacrifice?  She’s going to do this very difficult work of setting the UNIVERSE RIGHT while voluntarily, entirely, completely forgotten (by her own hand!) by her significant other who adores her,  all her friends in the community she chose to become independent from her parents, all alone.  

Holy shit.

Jughead’s sprint home after their kiss, which rightly seems to freeze time to be everlasting before Tabitha steps away, is so desperate and frantic.  Jughead who was terrified of being forgotten is beginning to forget the most important person in his adult life. All he has are the words “bend. toward. justice.” and the sense that something terrible has just happened to him, without the ability to remember what it is.   This isn’t the Sweet Hereafter.  This has to be hell.

I am LOVING this.  It’s so BIG.  I wish they could SHOW it though.  But I think eventually, because the universe does in fact bend towards justice, someone will write me the fanfic that will have me lain flat on the floor from devastation.  Because omg the Jabitha relationship has SCOPE.

And the final kicker-  Jughead doesn’t recognize his stupid hat.  Ha!

P.S.  The title reference, “Don’t Worry Darling”  if it’s to that movie that came out this year, in 2023, then it’s very twisty and fun.  Because that movie is about a man manipulating a woman’s mind for his own aggrandizement, and this episode is the mirror of that - a woman manipulating a man’s mind, with his explicit agreement, to save the universe.