#shut your eyes
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Being a fictive is so weird like
You literally know someone in such intimate detail but also extremely not
Like you're my stepdad but also you're him from when he was 12 and doesn't remember me like shit is wild man
#this might just be me#i've been going through it#if you know me no you don’t#shut your eyes#shut your mouth#look away#everything's gone to shit#i mean#might as well tag the fandom#dndads#dungeons and daddies#dndaddies#⛈️#fictive#also i know how being a fictive is don't come at me im just having a hard time and i miss my dad so stfu and let me cope
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Shut your eyes and think of somewhere Somewhere cold and caked in snow By the fire, we break the quiet Learn to wear each other well
Shut Your Eyes, Snow Patrol
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youtube
Snow Patrol- Shut your Eyes
One of my favorite bands
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Simon who's an attention whore. You cooking? So he's clinging on to your neck, grabbing away that spatula and kissing you giddy. You on work ? So he's leaning against the wall, brooding and whining and mewing. You out with your friends? He's sending that Little scratch he got, captioned with, “need kissies now”, he lowkey wants your fuckin' attention all the damn time and he's so shameless about it.
#RAMBLING!!!!!!#but he's a bbg and you can't tell me otherwise#I don't know he's like always wanting your eyes on him#he's trying so so so hard#Simon doesn't care if you're married for 9 years he's like that 14 year old guy who's listening to your music to impress#he's that guy !!! he's like “You see that idiot ? he doesn't deserve you.” while you roll your eyes and mutter#Simon we married shut up#cod simon ghost riley#ghost call of duty#call of duty#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost fluff#simon ghost x you#simon ghost riley#simon ghost x reader#simon riley x reader#simon ghost smut#simon my beloved#folkloregurl fics🪩
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this will never NOT be fucking crazy
#“ronan who could want anyone but chose adam for his hungry eyes” SHUT UP#maggie im at your door#the raven cycle#trc#maggie stiefvater#adam parrish#ronan lynch#pynch#blue lily lily blue
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i want the whole SEASON of bucktommy
i want buck being wooed - flowers and being taken out and a little protective hand on the small of his back
i want to hear all the soft ways tommy can say evan and the look on buck's face when he does
i want to see them at tommy's karaoke trivia place because holy shit buck would love it (and didnt oliver say that we're getting buck singing this season cause uhhhhh)
i love that this is such a fling, such a happy thing for buck - he is finally feeling that puzzle piece click into place and it is freeing
and i cant wait to see all the small ways we see that play out!!!
let buck be happy challenge 2k24!!!!
#i'll never shut up about this i fear#i am just SO happy to see a happy bi!buck exploring what his feelings mean!!#just getting to be!! and grow!! and flirt and have FUN!!!#god that euphoria when you realize that its okay that you dont have to choose you can just *be*#its so fucking real and i cant believe i get to see it through the eyes of my favorite character#is this?? real life??#fuck me up man#otp: better ways to get your attention#bucktommy#kinkley#tuck#?#evan buckley#tommy kinard#911 spoilers#911 abc#911 on abc#im just so fucking shook i cant believe it#its REAL#em speaks#mine
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Thanks.
Prev
#fop#fairly oddparents#fop a new wish#fairly oddparents a new wish#fop nature au#fop dev#fop dale#dev dimmadome#dale dimmadome#art#digital art#comic#The 'Thanks' after all of that makes me so insane Im not even sure I can fully articulate why#I mean. He got what he wanted. Honesty. Thats what you wanted right Dev?#what else do you say to that#He's spent his whole life being sure he knew the answer. That deep DEEP down dale did love him#Have you ever seen that post thats like“I was bawling my eyes out and somebody told me to shut up and I was so taken aback I stopped crying#I think he was so stunned that he just stopped crying.#or like when you get so upset that your feelings turn themselves off to protect you#is that a normal thing that happens to people Erm. anyway#Sorry lol as someone born to parents who.. should not have had me. Writing dale basically admitting as much is actually really cathartic#He shouldnt have had Dev. He doesnt love him. He cant. Dev cant do anything to change it. Its just a fact.#Hes not 1:1 with my parents they tried their best ig but like. their best was still pretty awful child neglect LOL
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i have a Scene - a Plot if you will - that backs this as context. y'all are gonna have to trust me on this one <3 or read the tags...
#the song is 'in your eyes' by peter gabriel#boombox serenade lets GO!!!#in my mind immediately after this the others came over to say hi (or in sallys case tell him off)#and at first howdy's like 'oh ofc wallys there that makes sense. sally too? strange but alright'#then eddie appears and ohhhh boy its Jealousy Central Babey and howdy's train just pulled into the station#scribble salad#laughingstock#welcome home#barnaby x howdy#howdy x barnaby#OK CONTEXT I PROMISED CONTEXT#so in my mind howdy is an oblivious dumbass when it comes to his own romantic feelings.#he's so in love with barnaby (its very obvious) but Doesnt Realize It. despite being a god tier flirty fruity motherfucker#so when barnaby - thinking theyre on the same page - confesses#howdy's all like 'ohhh um. gee barn im flattered truly but - i just dont like you like that'#yk breaking barnaby's heart right down the middle#so barnaby shuts himself in his home and wally is hovering. yk Worried#and eddie - who's been helping barnaby come to terms w/ his own feelings & gauge if howdy feels the same - asks sally to check in for him#& sally goes over and Immediately involves herself. she takes personal offense on barnaby's behalf#also she lives for the drama and wants every juice detail Hot Off The Press#so while howdy is having a lil crisis as he slowly realizes Oh My Fucking God I DO Love Barnaby Like That-#barnaby / sally / wally / (eventually) eddie are all having a sleepover where they just play card games and chat#a good ol bitch n' stitch night#and howdy shows up to try and talk to barns (obvs in my head he doesnt have a boombox he just Knocks)#only to get RE-RE-RE-REJECTEDDDDDD!!!! thats how it feels you wormy mf!#bc barnaby is a) having a girls night & b) needs to emotionally prepare for That conversation#aaaaand THATS the context <3
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they really put alicent in bridgerton blue on the reunion and genuinely expected me to think that she didn’t in fact march all the way to dragonstone to get wifed up? bfr
#I am only a girl living in a society#I make connections#she looks so pretty in blue though I want more#also you’re telling me that rhaenyra saw her walk in all cute looking to not completely crumble at the sight of her?#like my girl got all dolled up for you do something#rhaenyra IS a puppy dog when it comes to those bambi eyes shut up#Alicent was like you think you want her? I’m the love of your life you moron#and rhaenyra is like I KNOW#like she’s been trying to get the other woman to realize that very thing for the last 15+ years#and alicent’s all heartbroken like oh so you’re taking her to wife#and rhaenyra is like nO? WHAT?? all dumb and speechless cause jealous alicent was definitely not on her bingo card this year#whilst also having her own mental breakdown#because how on earth is she meant to explain this to her councel#or jace for that matter#that sure was goint to be a fun future conversation to have with her heir#but also Alicent just strutted into the room and started acting like a scorned wife?#which left rhaenyra feeling like the asshole parent who stopped paying for child support after the divorce#but also she never wanted a divorce in the first place?? and alicent doesn’t seem to get this?#like she’s already figuring out how to most efficiently empty daemon’s chambers for the woman to move in permanently#but alicent’s still yapping off about not having a place in court anymore and fleeing across the sea#and rhaenyra can’t help the bitter taste in her mouth as she states how that ship came in a little too late for them and it is messyyyy#hotd leaks#house of the dragon leaks#hotd spoilers#house of the dragon#house of the dragon spoilers#rhaenicent#alicent hightower#rhaenyra targaryen#bridgerton
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Very interesting to me that a certain subset of the BES fandom's favourite iterations of Mizu and Akemi are seemingly rooted in the facades they have projected towards the world, and are not accurate representations of their true selves.
And I see this is especially the case with Mizu, where fanon likes to paint her as this dominant, hyper-masculine, smirking Cool GuyTM who's going to give you her strap. And this idea of Mizu is often based on the image of her wearing her glasses, and optionally, with her cloak and big, wide-brimmed kasa.
And what's interesting about this, to me, is that fanon is seemingly falling for her deliberate disguise. Because the glasses (with the optional combination of cloak and hat) represent Mizu's suppression of her true self. She is playing a role.
Take this scene of Mizu in the brothel in Episode 4 for example. Here, not only is Mizu wearing her glasses to symbolise the mask she is wearing, but she is purposely acting like some suave and cocky gentleman, intimidating, calm, in control. Her voice is even deeper than usual, like what we hear in her first scene while facing off with Hachiman the Flesh-Trader in Episode 1.
This act that Mizu puts on is an embodiment of masculine showboating, which is highly effective against weak and insecure men like Hachi, but also against women like those who tried to seduce her at the Shindo House.
And that brings me to how Mizu's mask is actually a direct parallel to Akemi's mask in this very same scene.
Here, Akemi is also putting up an act, playing up her naivety and demure girlishness, using her high-pitched lilted voice, complimenting Mizu and trying to make small talk, all so she can seduce and lure Mizu in to drink the drugged cup of sake.
So what I find so interesting and funny about this scene, characters within it, and the subsequent fandom interpretations of both, is that everyone seems to literally be falling for the mask that Mizu and Akemi are putting up to conceal their identities, guard themselves from the world, and get what they want.
It's also a little frustrating because the fanon seems to twist what actually makes Mizu and Akemi's dynamic so interesting by flattening it completely. Because both here and throughout the story, Mizu and Akemi's entire relationship and treatment of each other is solely built off of masks, assumptions, and misconceptions.
Akemi believes Mizu is a selfish, cocky male samurai who destroyed her ex-fiance's career and life, and who abandoned her to let her get dragged away by her father's guards and forcibly married off to a man she didn't know. on the other hand, Mizu believes Akemi is bratty, naive princess who constantly needs saving and who can't make her own decisions.
These misconceptions are even evident in the framing of their first impressions of each other, both of which unfold in these slow-motion POV shots.
Mizu's first impression of Akemi is that of a beautiful, untouchable princess in a cage. Swirling string music in the background.
Akemi's first impression of Mizu is of a mysterious, stoic "demon" samurai who stole her fiance's scarf. Tense music and the sound of ocean waves in the background.
And then, going back to that scene of them together in Episode 4, both Mizu and Akemi continue to fool each other and hold these assumptions of each other, and they both feed into it, as both are purposely acting within the suppressive roles society binds them to in order to achieve their goals within the means they are allowed (Akemi playing the part of a subservient woman; Mizu playing the part of a dominant man).
But then, for once in both their lives, neither of their usual tactics work.
Akemi is trying to use flattery and seduction on Mizu, but Mizu sees right through it, knowing that Akemi is just trying to manipulate and harm her. Rather than give in to Akemi's tactics, Mizu plays with Akemi's emotions by alluding to Taigen's death, before pinning her down, and then when she starts crying, Mizu just rolls her eyes and tells her to shut up.
On the opposite end, when Mizu tries to use brute force and intimidation, Akemi also sees right through it, not falling for it, and instead says this:
"Under your mask, you're not the killer you pretend to be."
Nonetheless, despite the fact that they see a little bit through each other's masks, they both still hold their presumptions of each other until the very end of the season, with Akemi seeing Mizu as an obnoxious samurai swooping in to save the day, and Mizu seeing Akemi as a damsel in distress.
And what I find a bit irksome is that the fandom also resorts to flattening them to these tropes as well.
Because Mizu is not some cool, smooth-talking samurai with a big dick sword as Akemi (and the fandom) might believe. All of that is the facade she puts up and nothing more. In reality, Mizu is an angry, confused and lonely child, and a masterful artist, who is struggling against her own self-hatred. Master Eiji, her father figure who knows her best, knows this.
And Akemi, on the other hand, is not some girly, sweet, vain and spoiled princess as Mizu might believe. Instead she has never cared for frivolous things like fashion, love or looks, instead favouring poetry and strategy games instead, and has always only cared about her own independence. Seki, her father figure who knows her best, knows this.
But neither is she some authoritative dominatrix, though this is part of her new persona that she is trying to project to get what she wants. Because while Akemi is willful, outspoken, intelligent and authoritative, she can still be naive! She is still often unsure and needs to have her hand held through things, as she is still learning and growing into her full potential. Her new parental/guardian figure, Madame Kaji, knows this as well.
So with all that being said, now that we know that Mizu and Akemi are essentially wearing masks and putting up fronts throughout the show, what would a representation of Mizu's and Akemi's true selves actually look like? Easy. It's in their hair.
This shot on the left is the only time we see Mizu with her hair completely down. In this scene, she's being berated by Mama, and her guard is completely down, she has no weapon, and is no longer wearing any mask, as this is after she showed Mikio "all of herself" and tried to take off the mask of a subservient housewife. Thus, here, she is sad, vulnerable, and feeling small (emphasised further by the framing of the scene). This is a perfect encapsulation of what Mizu is on the inside, underneath all the layers of revenge-obsession and the walls she's put around herself.
In contrast, the only time we Akemi with her hair fully down, she is completely alone in the bath, and this scene takes place after being scorned by her father and left weeping at his feet. But despite all that, Akemi is headstrong, determined, taking the reigns of her life as she makes the choice to run away, but even that choice is reflective of her youthful naivety. She even gets scolded by Seki shortly after this in the next scene, because though she wants to be independent, she still hasn't completely learned to be. Not yet. Regardless, her decisiveness and moment of self-empowerment is emphasised by the framing of the scene, where her face takes up the majority of the shot, and she stares seriously into the middle distance.
To conclude, I wish popular fanon would stop mischaracterising these two, and flattening them into tropes and stereotypes (ie. masculine badass swordsman Mizu and feminine alluring queen but also girly swooning damsel Akemi), all of which just seems... reductive. It also irks me when Akemi is merely upheld as a love interest and romantic device for Mizu and nothing more, when she is literally Mizu's narrative foil (takes far more narrative precedence over romantic interest) and the deuteragonist of this show. She is her own person. That is literally the theme of her entire character and arc.
#blue eye samurai#mizu blue eye samurai#akemi blue eye samurai#blue eye samurai meta#just in case... im gonna tag this as#mizukemicritical#akemizucritical#though this post isnt actually criticising the ship itself but rather fanon's portrayal of the ship and the characters#for that reason lemme also tag this as#wank.mp3#feel free to disagree of course but please be civil#and if you need to rant about how wrong i am without any convincing evidence kindly feel free to make your own post. peace and love <3#fandom.rtf#meta dissertations.pdf#shut up haydar#edit: for full disclosure. i do rather dislike this ship. but obviously it's fine for anyone to enjoy it. please do! have your fun!#it's just that as usual! popular fanon and fandom around a ship is what has completely deterred me from any sense of enjoyment of it#it's a shame too because i was very open and even eager for some mizu/akemi romance in the future#but out-of-character fanon + the rudeness of certain fans has definitely soured it for me#but that doesn't mean people can't enjoy it obviously! ship and let ship!!!#plus it has its appeal which i DO STILL see and enjoy!!!!#i would even go as far as to call them soulmates because their narratives and characters are LITERALLY intertwined!!!#but. yeah. my gradual distaste for this ship is indeed very unfortunate.
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…It's nice. You're so noisy. […] Actually, it'd be better if we died together. That way, neither of us would have to suffer the pain of losing the other, right? Shut up.
KISEKI: DEAR TO ME Ep. 13
#kiseki: dear to me#kisekiedit#kdtm#kiseki dear to me#ai di x chen yi#chen yi x ai di#nat chen#chen bowen#louis chiang#chiang tien#jiang dian#userspring#uservid#userspicy#userrain#userjjessi#pdribs#*cajedit#*gif#AI DI'S FACE IN THE LAST GIFFFFFF IIIIIIIIII. LOOOOVE. HIIIMMMMM.#this might be the most romantic thing ive ever seen full stop#if you dont want to die with me so neither of us have to live without each other then why would i want you.#(but also ai di would have been okay with that. again. hes like. hes taking what he can get.#he thinks chen yi isnt as All In as he is....and this is the scene he realizes chen yi is just as insane about him and he is SOOOOO. happy!#i also love the face chen yi makes as he's getting in the car while ai di is calling at him to promise. he ROLLS HIS EYES.#he looks at ai di like. SURE jan. SURE ill let you die before me. SUUUURE i wont go insane if you die.#i just love how now theyre completely on the same page with each other. they know how much each loves the other#and both of them are so so happy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AGH.#'youre so noisy.' 'shut up.' chen yi just wants to kiss (hes laughing & fond & in love & not as good with words & its really. really cute.)#and the way he leans back and clears his throat like he cant believe what he just said but he would never take it back...baby...
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The Helena diaz of it all has me fascinated. I’ve said for a long while that Eddie’s real issues are his mommy issues and this episode just cemented for me that we’re gonna explore that and deal with it.
Because it’s Helena who forced Eddie to grow up to fast - because her husband wasn’t around much - so she pushed Eddie into de facto parent and husband role ls - selfishly filling her needs and ignoring the damage it was doing to her son (it is a form of abuse in my book).
Eddie then had the audacity to fall in love with and marry Shannon and get her pregnant. It’s why Helena was always so off with Shannon - she was punishing her. She is also punishing Eddie for all of this and his refusal to return to El Paso only cemented further her bitterness and resentment.
Now she does have Ramon back she doesn’t need Eddie any longer to fill that role so she is still punishing him and part of that is tied into her glee over now getting to parent Christopher - something she has always been intent on doing the doppelgänger just gave her the opportunity- as well as allowing her to further punish her son and his love of Shannon.
Her barbed comments about building a pool were all about showing what she can provide Christopher - how she is parenting him better than Eddie - it’s part of her mind games - making Eddie feel like more of a failure as a parent to his son.
The reality of course is that the reverse is true - Helena’s parenting is all superficial, flash and showy - it isn’t the hard day to day parenting when things get tough and you have to be the bad guy. While Eddie has made mistakes, there is nothing superficial, flash, or showy about his parenting. It’s why bucks comments about Eddie being a great dad are so important.
Eddie feel like a failure right now and that he is entirely to blame for everything. But in reality, while he does bear a bit of the responsibility, the truth of the matter is that he needs to learn and deal with the fact that all of it actually stems from Helena and her abuse of her young son - Shannon never stood a chance just like Eddie never has.
#genuinely don’t see how she can get any sort of redemption arc#but this is 911 so maybe they’ll find a way 🤷🏻♀️#Helena’s treatment of Eddie is a form of child abuse - it has done so much damage to him psychologically#I do really hope we finally get to meet Sophia and adriana as part of this arc beciase I think it might be very revealing#I am also wondering if Ramon had a stache in the past - and that is what Eddie is subconsciously trying to mimic#and that is about him trying to regain his mothers affection - trying to fill that husband role she forced him into#and that shaving it off is a part of his dealing with that and choosing to free himself from her clutches#and in doing that - standing up for himself etc - it will be the trigger that v ring schristopher back#the catholic guilt and Eddie’s queerness is also all tied up in this - the church reinforces and condones Helena and her actions#the Catholic Church has a long history of abuse of children in all it’s horrendous forms#so Eddie seeking solace in that direction think it will help him find away back to Helena’s good books only for it to open a few doors he#has bolted shut#as for the queer aspect - forcing Eddie to grow up too fast and fill this role of husband to his mother and parent to his siblings means#Eddie never got the chance to learn who he actually is - to explore his sexuality and all that goes with that - at the age one normally#would - as a teenager and into your 20’s. it explains so much around his relationship with Shannon and dealing with the helana of it all#and the queerness of his identity - will also allow him to actually let Shannon go#Eddie’s arc is going to be incredible - heartbreaking and gut wrenching - but incredible#Helena diaz it’s on sight - she is evil and cannot be redeemed in my eyes!#911 spoilers#Thinky thoughts#eddie diaz#911 abc
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you could point out how cool it is that snail shells and galaxies both have a spiral pattern, or how cricket chirps per minute plus forty equals the temperature in fahrenheit, and everyone's like "woahhh, scienc..."
you draw a similar parallel about menstrual cycles and the phases of the moon? well you are a woowoo feminist witch science denier. for some reason.
#sorry for appreciating the cool ass shit my body does#anyway#if you dont see the patterns#your third eye is slammed shut#and your neocortex is shriveled
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let's build a home, let's run away let's live our lives, in a distant place
#ts4#ts4 edit#violent affairs#nayef#sióar by lucidicer#p#IT'SFINALLY DONEEEE YIPPEEE#if you're danish and you happen to see this and their dialogue makes no sense just shut your eyes and keep on scrolling please <3 i TRIED#post canon good ending sioyef SAVE ME they will never be caught btw
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