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caffeinewitchcraft · 1 month ago

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AITA for divorcing my vampire husband because he lied to me about his human job?

I (542 vampire) and my husband (260 vampire) have been together for a little over two centuries. There’s a saying in the vampiric community that it takes a century for a tryst to become an enduring partnership and another century to become soulmates. I thought that was true and that Matthew (using his real name because fuck you, Matthew) and I would be together forever…until this week.

First, let me explain a few things to the mortals here. I don’t mean that negatively – I came here specifically to get the opinion of those with a finite lifespan. However, I want to be fair to Matthew as much as possible and some of his decisions are very immortal-minded.

Both Matthew and I are vampires who have chosen to forsake some of our powers in exchange for the ability to daywalk. We made the transition together on our 100th anniversary almost 115 years ago. It wasn’t an easy transition for me. I was very dependent on human blood and I spent the first twenty years in almost constant sleep as my body adjusted to running off of less lunar magic and more solar magic.

It really felt like I was losing everything. My body got physically weaker and my powers began to disappear one by one. It felt like every time I woke, another part of me was missing. One day I could turn into a wolf, the next I could barely turn into a vapor. I could command a legion of undying servants, and then I could barely convince the mailman he didn’t see me levitate down from the second floor.

Matthew, however, took to daywalking like a werewolf to a sheep farm. He barely seemed to feel the pain of losing his power, maybe because he was so much younger than me. Whatever the case, he was out all the time once he stabilized. He would be gone for days sometimes and when he came back it was with fantastic stories about the humans’ new inventions or the new structures being built in whatever town we were in.

I’m not saying I regret transitioning. Just that Matthew and I had very different experiences. It felt like he barely changed at all while my entire being got rewritten. Being immortal makes you comfortable in your own skin. I never doubted myself or my power after I turned 100. But becoming a daywalker made me feel like I was being born as a human again. It was humiliating and vulnerable. I have to admit there were times I resented how easily Matthew did it. I blamed him for not supporting me like I thought he should. I would daydream about draining a human in front of him, showing him what I thought of his fascination with them. I had all sorts of vile and vengeful thoughts. I’m not proud of the person I was and now I’m grateful Matthew wasn’t there to see the lows I sunk to.

Despite all my awful thoughts, I didn’t quit. I don’t know why, but I didn’t. I stuck with it and, day by day, things got easier.

After 26 years I began to stabilize. The benefits of being a daywalker slowly blossomed before me. Now I can say that I am completely happy with my daywalker status and all the changes it’s brought.

I am the most mentally stable I have been since my Turning in 1482. It’s like I’m awake. The fits of rage that used to consume me for months at a time have completely disappeared. I don’t experience the same level of obsession I used to which has freed up a lot of my time that I used to spend stalking my victims.

However, that drastic of a change would be challenging in any relationship. Matthew and I ended up together because of my obsessive nature. Our relationship became strained when that part of me went dormant. He expected me to follow his immersion into the human world just as I had followed him in his revenge quest against his Master. He expected me to support him wholeheartedly and with everything I was. He wanted sacrifices from me that I used to not even flinch at before making. But something was just…different. We wanted different things. I wanted different things.

Matthew was obsessed with being the perfect human. He craved full immersion. He still makes it a point to get a human job every twenty years or so. Me? I’m happy to live off our investments and some mild mind control while enjoying the art and theater community the humans have evolved.

It got bad. Some years, we spent like ghosts in our own house, drifting by each other without a glance. Other years, it was like we were spies behind enemy lines. He would do whatever he could to thwart me and I would go out of my way to ridicule him. Our vitriol poisoned the earth. Matthew didn’t speak to me for a full decade when that poison killed off an entire town.

About twenty years ago, it all came to a head. We had a serious sit-down talk about our relationship. It wasn’t easy. What they say about teaching an old dog new tricks is sometimes true. Matthew wanted me to be as involved with the humans as he was. He wanted me to care about them like he did. I wanted him to travel with me like we used to and not just hop from town to neighboring town (which he did to maintain a human identity with references so he could keep working). When it became clear that we were at an impasse, I brought up the idea of separation.

Separating in the vampiric world isn’t easy. There are a lot of alliances and blood oaths to be considered. Over the two centuries we spent together, we became known as a unit to a number of supernatural entities that we maintain an uneasy truce with. Separating would mean creating new oaths and alliances with the same individuals. And there was no guarantee that those individuals would make new pacts with both of you. A LOT of vampire couples end up in blood feuds while separating. Neither of us wanted that.

There was also, of course, the emotional side of things. While a lot of immortals tend to only feel muted emotions (especially vampires as old as me), Daywalking had made both of us more sensitive than we’d been before. We were both attached to the memories we shared and neither of us could imagine life without the other. After 200 years together, it felt like Matthew was my right arm, and I his. When I brought up separation, we both felt it like we were discussing an amputation.

After about a year of talking, we finally reached an agreement. We didn’t want to separate, and so we would compromise. I wouldn’t interfere with any of Matthew’s human jobs for the 15-17 years if he could hold them without arousing suspicion. In exchange, he would take a year off to go traveling with me before finding another town for us to live in. In between my trips, he would go to plays and galas with me to enjoy human artistry at least once a month.

Maybe our deal was in his favor. At the time, it felt practical and fair. A year of traveling wouldn’t undo Matthew’s string of connections. We would still see each other frequently by going on dates that I liked. Matthew would get to stay immersed in the human world at the level he wanted, and I could stay within my comfort zone.

Which brings me to my current problem.

We are currently at the start of one of Matthew’s work cycles. He’s been everything from a fireman to a politician to a subway worker to a barista. He craves knowledge and connection to a terrifying degree. If it weren’t for how we move every 20 years and he goes without protest, I’d call it obsession.

This cycle, Matthew told me he was going to be a teacher. I was hesitant. While the humans have become more tolerant and less violent over the years, that doesn’t mean they will tolerate us near their young. Enough humans know about vampires that staking in the modern era is a real possibility. Matthew could incite an angry mob against us or, heaven forbid, get a vampire hunter on our tail. I have yet to be shot, but I hear that they have silver bullets that hurt like Hell.

When I voiced my protests, Matthew reminded me about our agreement. He said that I wouldn’t interfere with his jobs and he’d go to all the plays I liked. He even pointed out that, as a teacher, he could get us into high school plays and expositions. I was uneasy, but agreements are penultimate to immortals. I silenced my objections and let him get a job as a science teacher at a local high school.

When Michael has had jobs in the past, I’ve never really paid attention. One time he was a state senator for ten years and I never even heard him speak. I didn’t consider it worth my time to hear whatever his facsimile of a human would say. Real humanity is in the art they create, not in the parody Michael enacts.

But this one…I couldn’t ignore this one. Maybe it was because I was still uneasy about his proximity to human young or maybe I could sense his lies even at the beginning. Whatever the case, I watched him.

The first thing I noticed was the hours. He would go to work early and would often come home when it was time for us to sleep. When I asked him about it, he said that he wasn’t used to grading and that he had underestimated what it took to put a good lesson plan together. I visited some online forums and that’s apparently reasonable for first year teachers.

He would also sometimes go in on the weekends. He missed one of our dates because there was a “grading emergency” that needed his immediate attention. Something about a student’s test getting lost and then found and he needed to input their grade before the deadline which was on Saturday. Humans like silly rules like that so I didn’t even look that one up. I just reminded him that he couldn’t miss our dates again or else he was breaking our deal. He apologized and said it wouldn’t happen again.

Then about three months into his new job, the phone calls started. We have a private room in our house for when we need to talk without any visitors overhearing. Michael moved all his school supplies in there, saying that he needed a silent space to concentrate on his grading. Whenever he got a call, he would never answer it in front of me. Instead, he’d say “Sorry, work” and just go into his office.

I also noticed that he didn’t dress very professionally. Human fashion changes quickly so it didn’t register at first. A sweatshirt here and there slipped past me, and also the Gucci slides. When he started wearing baggy jeans and jerseys to work, I noticed. I may not be up to date on all the newest fashions, but I do go to classy events. I know what a slob looks like and it didn’t sit right with me that he was wearing that to school. When I asked him about it, he always had an excuse. “This is what everyone wears” and “It’s a theme day” or, bafflingly, “It’s spirit week!”

I tried to leave it alone. The reason we have stayed together for so long is because of our agreement to not interfere in each other’s lives. But between his hours, the phone calls, and his appearance, something didn’t add up.

Then, last Thursday, he missed another one of our dates. We were supposed to go to the Nutcracker together. Even though I prefer matinees (when the cast is fresh), I agreed to get us tickets for the evening show so that he wouldn’t have to leave work early. When he wasn’t there at 7pm, I called him and he didn’t answer. Then, when I called him again, his phone was switched off.

I was furious. I spend nearly two decades in these tiny towns so he can live his human fantasy and he can’t even show up for one two hour show? It was the first time since becoming a daywalker that I felt that angry. I was scared about what I might do, so I made myself go home to wait for him.

Only, he never came home that night. At 3am, he sent me a text apologizing and promising to make up our date on Saturday. But the Nutcracker was only playing until Friday and that would be too little, too late. To be honest, it already was. I texted him that and he never responded.

He never ended up coming home last weekend. I texted and called him probably a dozen times and he never responded. I got angrier and angrier as the days dragged by. Did he think I was someone to be taken lightly? Did he not realize that the fragile agreement between us was all that was keeping us from separation?

Yesterday (Monday), I couldn’t take it anymore. If he wasn’t going to come home or respond to my messages, then I would go to him. If he was so obsessed with this new job that he would ignore me for it, then I knew exactly where to find him.

I arrived at his school at 10am. I researched enough to know how to go to the office and sign myself in. I asked the office assistant which room Mr. Duetto was in.

The lovely young woman looked confused. “I’m sorry, but I can’t give that information out to anyone but family,” she said.

“I am his only family,” I said.

She clicked a few more keys and looked more confused. “His paperwork only shows his mother, Delilah Duetto.”

That’s right. His mother. But I still didn’t understand then.

“That’s me,” I said.

“You are not the mother of 17-year-old.”

“I’m his wife,” I said.

She was upset by that. I won’t bore you with every detail, but I had to alter her memories so she wouldn’t call the police. I may not look like someone who has a teenager, but I also don’t look like a teenager. I ended up having to alter her memories so she wouldn’t call human CPS on an apparent adult swearing she was married to a minor.

I went home and broke into his office. There weren’t any lesson plans. There were no graded papers. There were syllabus from different classes, homework with his name on it, and a few polaroids taped to the bottom of his desk of him at a party with children.

Human children. I don’t honestly know which is worse.

(EDIT: I know the child part is the worst part. I misspoke because of my anger. It’s not the humans’ fault that my husband is a pervert.)

I broke into his laptop and used that to check his text messages. He’s been texting like a high schooler. He’s been to parties with them, listened to their problems and even fabricated a few of his own. He’s caught in some sort of weird love triangle where a freshman girl likes him but his “best friend” likes her. He has texted both of them about it, promising his “bro” that nothing is happening and then turning around and leading this girl-child on.

Some choice quotes: I should know better than to get close with you. You and I come from very different worlds

To which she replied, lol maybe we should let our worlds collide

!!!!

I find the entire situation disgusting. Matthew is several centuries older than them and he definitely knows better. He’s literally wearing the sheep’s fleece amongst the flock. He has no business forming relationships with human children and even less pretending to be one of them. He’s not a baby. He is over two centuries old!

What is he doing flirting with a child? It’s vile and disgusting and I was set to kill him for it.

I confronted him about it when he came home last night. I told him that he was sick and dangerous and if he loved humans then he needed to stop immediately. I told him we either left town today or I would make sure he never set foot back in that school in a way he really wouldn’t like.

He threw a huge tantrum over my invading his privacy. He shouted at me that I had broken my promise to never interfere in his job. He called me controlling and crazy.

I told him he was the crazy one for chatting up a child. He told me he wasn’t, she was just his friend. I asked him to read their texts out loud if he was being so friendly. I also pointed out that there was no way a 260-year-old vampire is a child’s friend.

He told me I was a hypocrite because I basically cradle robbed him (we’re almost 300 years apart.) He said if anyone was disgusting, it was me for taking advantage of him.

I pointed out that he wasn’t a child, he was over 60 and had already been a vampire for four decades. He argued that that was basically being a child in vampire terms.

I was so angry at that point that the house was shaking. I told him if he felt that way, then we could get divorced right then and there. That that was what I wanted to do anyway because I couldn’t be married to a pedophile.

He asked me if I was seriously going to start a blood feud over him immersing himself in human society. I said no, I’m starting a blood feud because he’s become every predatory stereotype humans have of vampires.

He called me a hypocrite again and told me he was leaving. He said not to call him unless I was ready to apologize. I told him that the next time he sees me, he’d better run before I showed him the real difference between us. And it wasn’t just 300 years.

When I calmed down, doubt started creeping in. From an immortal perspective, what he’s doing isn’t really wrong. I hate to say it, but most immortals don’t view human lives as significant. I know a few vampires who would say that divorcing because he’s playing with his food is idiotic.

Plus, there’s the agreement to consider. During our fight, Matthew pointed out that being a student is a job to humans. So therefore I didn’t have the right to interfere. A big part of me thinks that’s bullshit, but a small part of me wonders if he’s maybe right about that?

I also have to ask myself why this even bothers me. I’m the one in the relationship that is aloof from humans. I’m the one that’s always saying we are from different worlds (Yeah, he stole that from me) and for good reason.

But over the years, I’ve become fond of humans. No immortal makes art like them. I may not remember my time as a mortal, but there are works that give me a sense of nostalgia. Sometimes I think I can remember being a child myself, standing in a field like in Monet painting, staring at the wheatstacks and waiting for the miller to come.

The thought of Matthew playing with them makes me sick. It’s like even after all the years of him living amongst them, he thinks of them as props in his twisted play. It’s even worse that he’s doing this to children.

I can’t help but think something went really wrong with my husband when I wasn’t looking. At the very least, I’m planning on divorcing him. But would I be the asshole if I killed him too?

Separating from him will be violent and messy. There will likely be human casualties. But I don’t see any other way. So, I ask.

AITA for divorcing my husband for lying to me about his human job?

----

Thanks for reading! I loved answering some of the responses I got when I first posted this over on my Patreon (X)!

These collaborative story telling pieces are the highlight of my week. Next week's story is about a witch who wants to know if she should attend her high school reunion even though she's responsible for stripping two former classmates of their magic...

Please check that out here (X) if you''d like early access! Otherwise I'll see y'all next week :)

#my writing #long post #parody #aita parody #reddit #vampires #aita reddit parody

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ohnoitstbskyen · 2 days ago

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asking sincerely. do you see a romance between jayce and viktor? do you think they ended up being something romantic at the end?

With apologies I am going to only half talk about the thing you are asking me, since I have something else on my mind and you happened to hit the button that makes me vomit it into words.

Coming at this from an aromantic perspective, I obviously don't experience the state of absurd obsessive delusion that you bizarre romantic freaks fetishize so feverishly*, but I am often annoyed by the idea that friendship and romance are either opposites or mutually exclusive. From my perspective, the boundary between the two is at best thin, and more realistically not actually a boundary at all except by cultural construction.

*i am taking an excessively hostile, crass tone for my own amusement i do not mean this seriously please be normal at me, weird allo freaks

I won't get into my full feelings about the end of Arcane, but it seems perfectly plain to me that the script, the imagery and the animation presents Jayce and Viktor as two halves of a whole, not opposing forces but alike to yin and yang: opposites which each contain the other. And at the climax of the show, the greatest peril to life and peace in the narrative is resolved by these two men literally joining their bodies and souls together, and going into eternity holding one another for comfort and strength. They are quite literally soulmates, quite literally the most important people in one another's lives.

I don't think that that kind of intimate emotional connection between men must necessarily be either romantic or sexual - I am aromantic, and plenty of ace people exist, and there is nothing in our natures excluding us from intense connections of love with other people of any gender.

I also think it is willfully ignorant (and genuinely homophobic) to act as though these deep connections are mutually exclusive with sex and romance. As though if Viktor and Jayce fucked nasty and made out sloppy style, suddenly their intimacy is less pure or valid, or tainted somehow.

"If these two men who are emotionally close to one another also fuck or get romantically involved, then friendship is dead, murdered on the floor by a dick-shaped knife; vile sexuality corrupts and debases the true, pure and virtuous love of ✨friendship✨" <- This shit is homophobic at a baseline, queerphobic in general, and frankly as an aromantic man I find it pretty fucking insulting as well.

What, are my friendships with other men just inherently more pure and divine, more meaningful and true than a gay man's can ever be, because I will never suffer the vile temptation of adding romance to my affection? Is that how I should think of myself? And is an aroace man more pure than me still, the only source of TRUE male friendship that a man can ever experience, free from the pustulant corruption of sexuality and romantic desire?

You get this pathetic defensiveness (especially from men, but other genders aren't immune) wherein sex and sexuality and romance between men is perceived as a threat to men's right and ability to experience deep connection to each other. But the emotional castration of men comes not from people imagining sex and romance as a component of our relationships - it comes from people who insist that our emotional lives must be ruled by strict binaries. Sex and romance, OR ELSE friendship. Deep romantic connection OR ELSE deep platonic connection. Pick one and do not dare to imagine both, nor act as though the boundary between them is something that we built by cultural fiat, and which can be dismantled just the same.

And yes, yes, yes, I know there are cultural forces literally illuminati-style conspiring to systemically erase the entire existence of explicitly romantic, sexual male love from media, and I know that homophobic puritanism is on the rise and there are material concerns and a real necessity for explicit representation in fiction, yes I know. Everything is more complicated than a tumblr post can cover, I am not trying to Solve Rainbow Capitalism™ over here, I am trying to express frustration as an aromantic man that this stupid fucking binary keeps getting culturally reinforced by both my enemies and my well-meaning allies, when I think the binary is what's fucking killing us in the first place.

So anyway. My position is that Viktor and Jayce can be entirely aromantic no-homo friends, and they can fuck nasty in the throes of mutual need and obsession, and I refuse to entertain the idea that there is an irresolvable contradiction between those things. Each of those can contain the other, or become the other given time and circumstance.

What the imagery, storytelling and script of Arcane makes clear is that Viktor and Jayce love each other more than life itself. To say that that love must be shoved into the box of either "platonic" or "romantic" is to miss out on almost everything that is beautiful about love. It can be both and neither! It can be a secret third, ninth or fifteenth thing that they haven't invented a tag for on Ao3 yet.

They are giving each other whatever the spiritual mind-ghost equivalent of sloppy backshots are on the ethereal plain forever, they are the most romantic lovers in the cosmos, and they are also the most chaste and platonic life-partner friends you have ever seen, effortlessly intimate and unashamedly tender. They are men who love one another, in every way that love matters.

You can pick whichever interpretation brings you joy, and resonates with what your heart needs, the text of the show is eminently and explicity open to it, and anyone who says otherwise either failed to pay attention, or refused to pay attention on purpose.

#tb answers #hawkaboy #arcane #arcane spoilers #jayvik #jayce talis #viktor arcane

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princesssarisa · 2 years ago

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In the past I've shared other people's musings about the different interpretations of the myth of Orpheus and Eurydice. Namely, why Orpheus looks back at Eurydice, even though he knows it means he'll lose her forever. So many people seem to think they've found the one true explanation of the myth. But to me, the beauty of myths is that they have many possible meanings.

So I thought I would share a list of every interpretation I know, from every serious adaptation of the story and every analysis I've ever heard or read, of why Orpheus looks back.

One interpretation – advocated by Monteverdi's opera, for example – is that the backward glance represents excessive passion and a fatal lack of self-control. Orpheus loves Eurydice to such excess that he tries to defy the laws of nature by bringing her back from the dead, yet that very same passion dooms his quest fo fail, because he can't resist the temptation to look back at her.

He can also be seen as succumbing to that classic "tragic flaw" of hubris, excessive pride. Because his music and his love conquer the Underworld, it might be that he makes the mistake of thinking he's entirely above divine law, and fatally allows himself to break the one rule that Hades and Persephone set for him.

Then there are the versions where his flaw is his lack of faith, because he looks back out of doubt that Eurydice is really there. I think there are three possible interpretations of this scenario, which can each work alone or else co-exist with each other. From what I've read about Hadestown, it sounds as if it combines all three.

In one interpretation, he doubts Hades and Persephone's promise. Will they really give Eurydice back to him, or is it all a cruel trick? In this case, the message seems to be a warning to trust in the gods; if you doubt their blessings, you might lose them.

Another perspective is that he doubts Eurydice. Does she love him enough to follow him? In this case, the warning is that romantic love can't survive unless the lovers trust each other. I'm thinking of Moulin Rouge!, which is ostensibly based on the Orpheus myth, and which uses Christian's jealousy as its equivalent of Orpheus's fatal doubt and explicitly states "Where there is no trust, there is no love."

The third variation is that he doubts himself. Could his music really have the power to sway the Underworld? The message in this version would be that self-doubt can sabotage all our best efforts.

But all of the above interpretations revolve around the concept that Orpheus looks back because of a tragic flaw, which wasn't necessarily the view of Virgil, the earliest known recorder of the myth. Virgil wrote that Orpheus's backward glance was "A pardonable offense, if the spirits knew how to pardon."

In some versions, when the upper world comes into Orpheus's view, he thinks his journey is over. In this moment, he's so ecstatic and so eager to finally see Eurydice that he unthinkingly turns around an instant too soon, either just before he reaches the threshold or when he's already crossed it but Eurydice is still a few steps behind him. In this scenario, it isn't a personal flaw that makes him look back, but just a moment of passion-fueled carelessness, and the fact that it costs him Eurydice shows the pitilessness of the Underworld.

In other versions, concern for Eurydice makes him look back. Sometimes he looks back because the upward path is steep and rocky, and Eurydice is still limping from her snakebite, so he knows she must be struggling, in some versions he even hears her stumble, and he finally can't resist turning around to help her. Or more cruelly, in other versions – for example, in Gluck's opera – Eurydice doesn't know that Orpheus is forbidden to look back at her, and Orpheus is also forbidden to tell her. So she's distraught that her husband seems to be coldly ignoring her and begs him to look at her until he can't bear her anguish anymore.

These versions highlight the harshness of the Underworld's law, and Orpheus's failure to comply with it seems natural and even inevitable. The message here seems to be that death is pitiless and irreversible: a demigod hero might come close to conquering it, but through little or no fault of his own, he's bound to fail in the end.

Another interpretation I've read is that Orpheus's backward glance represents the nature of grief. We can't help but look back on our memories of our dead loved ones, even though it means feeling the pain of loss all over again.

Then there's the interpretation that Orpheus chooses his memory of Eurydice, represented by the backward glance, rather than a future with a living Eurydice. "The poet's choice," as Portrait of a Lady on Fire puts it. In this reading, Orpheus looks back because he realizes he would rather preserve his memory of their youthful, blissful love, just as it was when she died, than face a future of growing older, the difficulties of married life, and the possibility that their love will fade. That's the slightly more sympathetic version. In the version that makes Orpheus more egotistical, he prefers the idealized memory to the real woman because the memory is entirely his possession, in a way that a living wife with her own will could never be, and will never distract him from his music, but can only inspire it.

Then there are the modern feminist interpretations, also alluded to in Portrait of a Lady on Fire but seen in several female-authored adaptations of the myth too, where Eurydice provokes Orpheus into looking back because she wants to stay in the Underworld. The viewpoint kinder to Orpheus is that Eurydice also wants to preserve their love just as it was, youthful, passionate, and blissful, rather than subject it to the ravages of time and the hardships of life. The variation less sympathetic to Orpheus is that Euyridice was at peace in death, in some versions she drank from the river Lethe and doesn't even remember Orpheus, his attempt to take her back is selfish, and she prefers to be her own free woman than be bound to him forever and literally only live for his sake.

With that interpretation in mind, I'm surprised I've never read yet another variation. I can imagine a version where, as Orpheus walks up the path toward the living world, he realizes he's being selfish: Eurydice was happy and at peace in the Elysian Fields, she doesn't even remember him because she drank from Lethe, and she's only following him now because Hades and Persephone have forced her to do so. So he finally looks back out of selfless love, to let her go. Maybe I should write this retelling myself.

Are any of these interpretations – or any others – the "true" or "definitive" reason why Orpheus looks back? I don't think so at all. The fact that they all exist and can all ring true says something valuable about the nature of mythology.

#mythology #greek mythology #orpheus #eurydice #orpheus and eurydice #analysis #interpretations #adaptations #long

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lastoneout · 20 days ago

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I keep thinking about all of the disabled activists and people before me who stranded themselves on the 4th floor of buildings for weeks and crawled up stairs and fought with airline staff and schools and doctors and refused to stop existing in the face of injustice and bigotry no matter how big and scary and hopeless it seemed. Every time I get angry and scared the protests that lead to the creation of the ADA pop up again and remind me that disabled people are so much fucking stronger than anyone has ever given us credit for, and I can't help but be proud of that. And I know not all disabled people feel like we should take pride in our disabilities and have flags or whatever, but I think not just living, but thriving, in spite of a world that wants us dead and gone, in the face of both illness and persecution, and how we've not only bought ourselves forward, but uplifted the disabled people around us, secured more equal futures for everyone who will come after, and truly changed the way so many abled people have seen us for the better is something to be damn fucking proud of.

We have always been here and we always will be, there will never be a world without disabled people because being disabled is not bad, it's a natural part of the human experience and yeah it sucks some times but even when it sucks we have fought to build beautiful, unique, happy lives with people, both like us and not, and that should be celebrated.

The first sign of human civilization is the healed femur. The body of the profoundly disabled person who would have needed help to even just eat being carefully laid to rest after decades of a full, happy life. The medicinal plants showing even before we were entirely human we were doing what we could to not just survive, but alleviate suffering while we're at it. Above everything, evolution selected not the baby who can walk and eat and be quiet, but the one that can ask for help.

Disabled people are not just angry cockroach motherfuckers who refuse to die, we are proof of humanity's HUMANITY. Proof that natural selection selected a species that takes care of each other. From healed femurs and medicinal plants to vaccines and IVs and insulin to now, we are driven to help one another, we are at our strongest when we don't leave our most vulnerable behind. And I am living proof of that. My mother is living proof of that. Every disabled and chronically and/or mentally ill person I know is living proof of that.

And I don't know about the rest of you, but will carry that shred of humanity's true nature inside me like it's my fucking soul. I am scared and angry and hurt, but I have a lifetime's experience being scared and angry, and I can shake off the kind of pain that would make Atlas crumble to dust like it's nothing but a stiff fucking breeze. Disabled people have always been here, turning fear and anger and pain into joy and beauty and connection, and I'm not going to let everyone who came before me down. I'm not going to give up. Not now, not ever.

It's okay if you're disabled and you've hit your limit, you're too scared and tired and hurt, I won't blame you. But I won't abandon you, either. I might not be able to right all of the wrongs in the world, but I'll be strong, I'll carry all of you with me, I will not give up.

As I've said before, society hates a cripple who won't die, so we must spite them and live anyway.

Please, live anyway. I know if anyone can, it's us.

#there that's my thesis about all this hope it helps #abled people can reblog this btw #pls support the disabled people in your lives they need you #us politics #us election #just for the blacklist #current events #cripple punk #cpunk #disabled #disability justice #disabled liberation

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esotericalchemist · 3 months ago

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𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐍𝐨𝐝𝐞 - 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐞𝐭 𝐠𝐨 𝐨𝐟 ⭒❃.✮:▹

Masterlist - YouTube (subliminals)

The South Node in astrology symbolizes the traits, habits, and behaviors we've brought with us from past lives or early experiences. It's our comfort zone, the familiar ground we often retreat to because it feels safe and natural. However, while the South Node reveals our inherent strengths and tendencies, it also shows us what we need to release in order to grow. Holding on to the patterns tied to the South Node can keep us stuck, preventing us from evolving into our full potential. True growth comes from recognizing these tendencies, understanding how they impact our lives, and consciously deciding to let go of what no longer serves us. By doing this, we open ourselves up to the lessons of the North Node, embracing new paths that lead to deeper fulfillment and personal development.

✫ 𝐀𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐍𝐨𝐝𝐞 ✫

Your soul's growth in this lifetime requires you to release the intense drive for independence, impulsivity, and self-centeredness that has characterized your past experiences. Holding onto these tendencies can keep you stuck in patterns that no longer serve your highest good. Instead, your journey towards your Libra North Node is about learning to embrace balance, diplomacy, and the importance of relationships. It’s time to recognize that true fulfillment doesn’t come from going it alone but from connecting with others, finding harmony, and understanding the value of collaboration over solitary pursuits. As you move toward this more relational and balanced way of being, you'll find a deeper sense of purpose and peace.

Aries South Node in the 1st House: Release the constant urge to assert your independence; instead, prioritize partnership and shared decision-making.

Aries South Node in the 2nd House: Shift your focus from accumulating material wealth and self-sufficiency; learn to value and share resources with others.

Aries South Node in the 3rd House: Move away from impulsive or domineering communication; work on fostering balanced and thoughtful interactions.

Aries South Node in the 4th House: Let go of the need to control your home environment; instead, focus on creating harmony and collaboration within your family.

Aries South Node in the 5th House: Stop seeking personal recognition in your creative pursuits; appreciate the value of shared creative experiences and collaborations.

Aries South Node in the 6th House: Move beyond working in isolation and focusing solely on personal tasks; embrace cooperation and teamwork in your daily life.

Aries South Node in the 7th House: Release the tendency to dominate relationships; concentrate on building partnerships based on mutual respect and balance.

Aries South Node in the 8th House: Let go of the need to control shared resources or power dynamics; instead, build trust and share power in your intimate relationships.

Aries South Node in the 9th House: Shift from a narrow focus on your own beliefs and philosophies; open yourself to other perspectives for a more balanced worldview.

Aries South Node in the 10th House: Stop striving for success through self-reliance alone; cultivate supportive relationships that can help you achieve your professional goals.

Aries South Node in the 11th House: Release the desire to lead or control group dynamics; focus on fostering equal and cooperative relationships within your community.

Aries South Node in the 12th House: Move away from facing challenges in isolation; learn to build supportive partnerships and rely on others for mutual growth.

✫ 𝐓𝐚𝐮𝐫𝐮𝐬 𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐍𝐨𝐝𝐞 ✫

For your personal growth, it's essential to release your strong attachment to material security, comfort, and resistance to change. These familiar patterns may feel safe, but they can also hold you back from reaching your full potential. Moving towards your Scorpio North Node invites you to embrace transformation, engage in deep emotional connections, and have the courage to explore the unknown. This journey is about discovering that true security comes not from clinging to what’s familiar but from evolving and allowing yourself to be transformed by life’s challenges and mysteries.

Taurus South Node in the 1st House: Let go of the need for a comfortable, predictable self-image; instead, embrace the transformative journey of evolving your identity.

Taurus South Node in the 2nd House: Release your attachment to material possessions and financial security; focus on cultivating deeper emotional and spiritual values.

Taurus South Node in the 3rd House: Move beyond surface-level communication and routine thinking; engage in conversations that lead to deeper understanding and personal growth.

Taurus South Node in the 4th House: Let go of the need for a stable, unchanging home life; embrace emotional transformation within your family and personal relationships.

Taurus South Node in the 5th House: Release the focus on creative endeavors solely for self-gratification; explore artistic expressions that bring deeper emotional fulfillment and shared experiences.

Taurus South Node in the 6th House: Move away from rigid routines and an overemphasis on physical health; embrace holistic practices that address emotional and spiritual well-being.

Taurus South Node in the 7th House: Let go of the need for stable, predictable relationships; learn to value intimacy and the transformative power of deep connections.

Taurus South Node in the 8th House: Release the fear of losing control over shared resources and emotional ties; focus on building trust and embracing transformative partnerships.

Taurus South Node in the 9th House: Move beyond the comfort of familiar beliefs and philosophies; seek transformative experiences that challenge and expand your worldview.

Taurus South Node in the 10th House: Let go of the desire for material success and a stable career; embrace opportunities that lead to profound personal growth and transformation.

Taurus South Node in the 11th House: Release the comfort of familiar social networks; engage with groups and causes that push you toward deeper, transformative connections.

Taurus South Node in the 12th House: Move away from seeking comfort in solitude or avoiding deep emotional challenges; confront your fears and embrace spiritual transformation.

✫ 𝐆𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐢 𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐍𝐨𝐝𝐞 ✫

To foster your personal growth, it’s important to move beyond your attachment to superficial knowledge, scattered thinking, and the constant need for new mental stimuli. While these traits may have served you in the past, they can now limit your potential. Embracing your Sagittarius North Node requires you to seek deeper wisdom, cultivate broad perspectives, and focus on meaningful goals and experiences. This journey is about shifting from a surface-level engagement with life to one that is richer, more purposeful, and grounded in lasting understanding.

Gemini South Node in the 1st House: Let go of the habit of constantly adapting your identity to fit in; instead, embrace a more stable, authentic sense of self that reflects deeper wisdom.

Gemini South Node in the 2nd House: Release the focus on accumulating trivial knowledge or material possessions; shift towards cultivating values that have broader, long-term significance.

Gemini South Node in the 3rd House: Move beyond the need for surface-level communication and mental stimulation; engage in deeper, more meaningful conversations that explore philosophical ideas.

Gemini South Node in the 4th House: Let go of focusing on mundane family matters or small talk; instead, nurture deeper emotional bonds and create a home environment that encourages growth and understanding.

Gemini South Node in the 5th House: Release the habit of engaging in creative activities purely for fun; explore artistic expressions that convey deeper truths and reflect broader perspectives.

Gemini South Node in the 6th House: Move away from routines filled with distractions and trivial tasks; focus on work that aligns with your higher ideals and contributes to meaningful growth.

Gemini South Node in the 7th House: Let go of relationships that are based solely on intellectual stimulation; seek partnerships that challenge you to grow and explore deeper, more meaningful aspects of life.

Gemini South Node in the 8th House: Release the tendency to avoid deep emotional issues or focus on surface-level matters; engage in transformative experiences that lead to profound emotional and spiritual growth.

Gemini South Node in the 9th House: Move beyond a narrow focus on everyday concerns and trivial knowledge; seek out higher education, travel, and experiences that broaden your worldview and understanding.

Gemini South Node in the 10th House: Let go of the need to be recognized primarily for your communication skills; focus on building a career that reflects your deeper purpose and philosophical beliefs.

Gemini South Node in the 11th House: Release the habit of forming friendships based on shared trivial interests; instead, seek connections with those who share your higher ideals and aspirations.

Gemini South Node in the 12th House: Move away from intellectualizing your spiritual experiences; embrace a more intuitive, expansive approach to spirituality and personal growth.

✫ 𝐂𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫 𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐍𝐨𝐝𝐞 ✫

To truly grow and evolve, it's essential to release your attachment to emotional security, dependency, and the tendency to remain within your comfort zone. These patterns, while familiar and safe, can prevent you from achieving your full potential. Moving toward your Capricorn North Node requires embracing responsibility, leadership, and a focus on long-term success and recognition. This journey is about stepping into your power, taking control of your destiny, and striving for achievements that bring lasting fulfillment and respect.

Cancer South Node in the 1st House: Let go of defining yourself through your emotional needs and family ties; instead, cultivate a strong, independent identity rooted in personal responsibility and professional achievements.

Cancer South Node in the 2nd House: Release the habit of seeking comfort through material possessions or financial security; focus on building lasting stability through disciplined effort and strategic investments.

Cancer South Node in the 3rd House: Move beyond emotionally driven communication and a focus on the familiar; embrace clear, purposeful communication that supports your long-term goals.

Cancer South Node in the 4th House: Let go of over-identifying with your home or family life; instead, pursue success in the public sphere and build a career that brings you recognition and respect.

Cancer South Node in the 5th House: Release the need for emotional validation through creative pursuits or romantic relationships; channel your energy into disciplined work that contributes to your long-term ambitions.

Cancer South Node in the 6th House: Move away from nurturing others in your daily work; focus on efficiency, discipline, and professional growth in how you approach your responsibilities.

Cancer South Node in the 7th House: Let go of emotional dependency in relationships; seek partnerships that are grounded in mutual respect, shared goals, and long-term success.

Cancer South Node in the 8th House: Release the tendency to rely on others for emotional or financial support; focus on building your own resources and stepping into a position of power and authority.

Cancer South Node in the 9th House: Move beyond emotional attachment to familiar beliefs or cultural traditions; embrace the challenge of expanding your horizons through education, travel, and new experiences.

Cancer South Node in the 10th House: Let go of seeking emotional validation through your career; focus on achieving success through strategic planning, hard work, and dedication to your professional goals.

Cancer South Node in the 11th House: Release the desire for emotional security within social groups or causes; instead, focus on forming connections that support your professional aspirations and long-term ambitions.

Cancer South Node in the 12th House: Move away from emotional retreat and escapism; embrace the discipline required to face your challenges and pursue your ambitions with determination.

✫ 𝐋𝐞𝐨 𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐍𝐨𝐝𝐞 ✫

For your personal growth, it's crucial to release your attachment to seeking personal validation, being the center of attention, and focusing exclusively on your own ambitions. These tendencies, while they may have brought you recognition in the past, can now hold you back from a deeper sense of fulfillment. Moving toward your Aquarius North Node encourages you to embrace collective efforts, innovation, and working towards goals that serve the greater good rather than just your own desires. This path is about shifting your focus from self-centered achievements to contributions that uplift and benefit the community as a whole.

Leo South Node in the 1st House: Let go of the urge to always be in the spotlight; instead, develop a sense of self that is more collaborative and aligned with the needs of the community.

Leo South Node in the 2nd House: Release the habit of measuring your self-worth by material wealth and personal possessions; focus on how you can contribute to shared resources and community prosperity.

Leo South Node in the 3rd House: Move beyond the need for recognition in your communication; focus on fostering collaborative dialogues that inspire innovation and collective advancement.

Leo South Node in the 4th House: Let go of dominating your family life for personal acknowledgment; instead, create a home environment where equality and collective well-being are prioritized.

Leo South Node in the 5th House: Release the need for personal glory in creative projects; channel your creative energies into endeavors that uplift and involve the community.

Leo South Node in the 6th House: Move away from seeking individual recognition in your daily work; focus on how your contributions can improve the lives of others and advance common goals.

Leo South Node in the 7th House: Let go of the tendency to dominate in partnerships; cultivate relationships based on equality, shared responsibilities, and mutual respect.

Leo South Node in the 8th House: Release the desire to control shared resources for personal gain; instead, focus on fair management and distribution of resources for the good of all involved.

Leo South Node in the 9th House: Move beyond asserting your beliefs for personal validation; embrace a more open and collaborative approach to sharing knowledge and exploring new perspectives.

Leo South Node in the 10th House: Let go of striving for personal fame and status; focus on building a career that makes a positive impact on society and contributes to the greater good.

Leo South Node in the 11th House: Release the habit of seeking leadership roles in groups for personal recognition; instead, engage in collective efforts that prioritize the welfare of the community.

Leo South Node in the 12th House: Move away from self-centered isolation; embrace spiritual practices and activities that serve the collective and benefit the broader community.

✫ 𝐕𝐢𝐫𝐠𝐨 𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐍𝐨𝐝𝐞 ✫

For your personal growth, it’s important to let go of your attachment to perfectionism, over-analysis, and the need to control every detail. These habits, while they may have provided a sense of security, can now hold you back from experiencing a deeper, more fulfilling life. Moving toward your Pisces North Node invites you to embrace intuition, compassion, and a trust in the natural flow of life without overthinking. This path encourages you to find peace in the unknown and to connect with others and the world around you in a more fluid and empathetic way.

Virgo South Node in the 1st House: Let go of the need to perfect your self-image; instead, present yourself with a more intuitive and compassionate approach that reflects your inner wisdom.

Virgo South Node in the 2nd House: Release the habit of meticulously controlling your finances and possessions; trust in the universe’s abundance and adopt a more relaxed approach to material security.

Virgo South Node in the 3rd House: Move beyond overanalyzing every conversation or piece of information; focus on developing a more intuitive and spiritually connected way of thinking and communicating.

Virgo South Node in the 4th House: Let go of the desire to keep your home life perfectly organized; instead, create a warm, emotionally nurturing environment that fosters spiritual growth.

Virgo South Node in the 5th House: Release the need for perfect creative expression; allow your creativity to flow freely, embracing the beauty in its imperfections.

Virgo South Node in the 6th House: Move away from obsessing over daily routines and health habits; focus on a holistic approach to well-being that includes your spiritual and emotional health.

Virgo South Node in the 7th House: Let go of critiquing and trying to perfect your relationships; focus on nurturing connections that are rooted in empathy, understanding, and emotional depth.

Virgo South Node in the 8th House: Release the need to control shared resources or emotional dynamics; trust in the transformative power of deep emotional and spiritual connections.

Virgo South Node in the 9th House: Move beyond a narrow, analytical approach to learning and belief systems; embrace a broader, more spiritual perspective that trusts in the mysteries of life.

Virgo South Node in the 10th House: Let go of striving for a flawless career or public image; instead, focus on contributing to the collective good and allowing your professional life to unfold naturally.

Virgo South Node in the 11th House: Release the habit of micromanaging or critiquing social groups; embrace a compassionate, inclusive approach to community involvement and collective progress.

Virgo South Node in the 12th House: Move away from self-criticism and isolation; instead, surrender to spiritual growth and embrace the flow of life with compassion for yourself and others.

✫ 𝐋𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚 𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐍𝐨𝐝𝐞 ✫

To grow, you need to release your tendency to rely on others for validation, avoid conflict, and overcompromise in the name of harmony. While these behaviors may have provided comfort, they can also prevent you from fully embracing your individuality. Moving toward your Aries North Node involves embracing independence, assertiveness, and the courage to pursue your desires without needing constant approval.

Libra South Node in the 1st House: Let go of defining yourself through others' opinions or relationships; focus on building a strong, independent identity based on your own values and desires.

Libra South Node in the 2nd House: Release the habit of valuing yourself based on how others perceive you or your ability to maintain peace; instead, cultivate self-worth through personal achievements and assertive action.

Libra South Node in the 3rd House: Move beyond avoiding conflict in communication; embrace direct, honest conversations where you confidently express your own ideas and opinions.

Libra South Node in the 4th House: Let go of the need to keep peace at home at the expense of your own needs; focus on establishing a household where your voice and desires are equally respected.

Libra South Node in the 5th House: Release the tendency to seek approval in your creative and romantic endeavors; instead, pursue your passions boldly and without concern for others' judgments.

Libra South Node in the 6th House: Move away from trying to please everyone in your work or daily routines; instead, take initiative and pursue what you believe is right, even if it means standing alone.

Libra South Node in the 7th House: Let go of losing yourself in relationships or making excessive compromises; focus on maintaining your independence and asserting your needs within partnerships.

Libra South Node in the 8th House: Release the habit of relying on others for emotional or financial support; instead, develop your own resources and power, embracing self-sufficiency.

Libra South Node in the 9th House: Move beyond the need to follow others' beliefs or philosophies; embrace your own truth and the courage to explore and stand by your personal convictions.

Libra South Node in the 10th House: Let go of seeking validation through career achievements or public approval; focus on pursuing a career path that aligns with your personal goals and ambitions.

Libra South Node in the 11th House: Release the tendency to conform to group norms or seek approval from social circles; instead, lead with your vision and assert your individuality in social settings.

Libra South Node in the 12th House: Move away from hiding your true self to avoid conflict; embrace your individuality and the courage to express your true identity, even in spiritual or introspective matters.

✫ 𝐒𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐩𝐢𝐨 𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐍𝐨𝐝𝐞 ✫

To foster personal growth, it's essential to release your need for control, emotional intensity, and the tendency to dwell on the darker, more complex aspects of life. While these traits may have provided depth and insight, they can also lead to unnecessary complications and emotional turbulence. Moving toward your Taurus North Node invites you to embrace simplicity, stability, and a more grounded, peaceful approach to living. This path encourages you to find contentment in the present moment, cultivate inner calm, and appreciate the beauty in life’s simple pleasures.

Scorpio South Node in the 1st House: Let go of projecting a controlling or intense image; instead, focus on cultivating a calm, stable identity that radiates peace and simplicity.

Scorpio South Node in the 2nd House: Release the habit of obsessing over financial security and material wealth; instead, find contentment in simplicity and adopt a more relaxed approach to resources.

Scorpio South Node in the 3rd House: Move beyond the need for intense or secretive communication; embrace clear, honest conversations that build trust and openness.

Scorpio South Node in the 4th House: Let go of emotional entanglements and power struggles within your family; focus on building a nurturing, stable home environment that promotes peace.

Scorpio South Node in the 5th House: Release the need for drama or control in creative and romantic pursuits; enjoy the simple pleasures of creativity and love without the need for intensity.

Scorpio South Node in the 6th House: Move away from obsessing over health and routines; adopt a balanced, grounded approach to daily life that supports overall well-being.

Scorpio South Node in the 7th House: Let go of power struggles and emotional control in relationships; focus on cultivating stable, respectful partnerships that bring mutual peace.

Scorpio South Node in the 8th House: Release the habit of trying to control shared resources and emotional dynamics; trust in the natural flow of life and embrace a peaceful approach to intimacy.

Scorpio South Node in the 9th House: Move beyond an obsessive pursuit of deep truths and hidden knowledge; instead, adopt a practical, grounded approach to learning and spirituality.

Scorpio South Node in the 10th House: Let go of the need to manipulate your career path or public image; focus on building a solid, dependable reputation through consistent effort and integrity.

Scorpio South Node in the 11th House: Release the tendency to engage in power dynamics within social groups; instead, nurture genuine, straightforward friendships and community ties.

Scorpio South Node in the 12th House: Move away from lingering in past traumas or engaging in hidden fears; embrace spiritual practices that bring peace, grounding, and simplicity.

✫ 𝐒𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐮𝐬 𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐍𝐨𝐝𝐞 ✫

To truly grow and evolve, it's essential to release your tendency to chase grand ideals, avoid details, and resist commitment in favor of constant exploration. While these traits have given you a broad perspective, they can also prevent you from engaging fully with the present and with the practical aspects of life. Moving toward your Gemini North Node encourages you to embrace curiosity, flexibility, and a willingness to engage with everyday learning and communication. This path is about finding meaning in the ordinary, being open to new ideas, and connecting with the world around you in a more immediate and tangible way.

Sagittarius South Node in the 1st House: Let go of defining yourself through expansive ideas or philosophical beliefs; focus on developing a more adaptable, curious approach to life and self-expression.

Sagittarius South Node in the 2nd House: Release the habit of pursuing grand, idealistic financial goals; instead, cultivate practical financial habits and appreciate the small joys in everyday life.

Sagittarius South Node in the 3rd House: Move beyond the tendency to overlook details or dismiss local matters; embrace learning and communication that is grounded in practical, everyday experiences.

Sagittarius South Node in the 4th House: Let go of the desire to escape or idealize your home and family life; focus on creating genuine connections and engaging in open, honest communication with loved ones.

Sagittarius South Node in the 5th House: Release the need for grand, adventurous expressions of creativity or romance; instead, find joy in the small, everyday moments and embrace a more lighthearted, flexible approach to creativity.

Sagittarius South Node in the 6th House: Move away from a restless approach to your daily routines and health; develop consistent habits and a balanced approach to managing your everyday responsibilities.

Sagittarius South Node in the 7th House: Let go of the tendency to idealize or seek freedom in relationships at the expense of deeper connection; focus on building relationships that are based on mutual understanding, communication, and shared experiences.

Sagittarius South Node in the 8th House: Release the habit of avoiding emotional depth or intense situations by focusing on grander ideas; instead, embrace the details of intimate relationships and the shared management of resources.

Sagittarius South Node in the 9th House: Move beyond the need to pursue distant, lofty goals or ideals at the expense of practical learning; instead, engage in everyday education and open yourself to new perspectives through local experiences.

Sagittarius South Node in the 10th House: Let go of the desire to achieve success through big, sometimes unrealistic, career aspirations; instead, focus on building a career that values communication, adaptability, and practical skills.

Sagittarius South Node in the 11th House: Release the tendency to focus on broad, utopian visions in your social groups; instead, cultivate friendships and community ties that are based on shared everyday experiences and interests.

Sagittarius South Node in the 12th House: Move away from escaping into grand philosophical or spiritual ideals; instead, ground your spiritual practices in everyday life and embrace the details of your inner journey.

✫ 𝐂𝐚𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐍𝐨𝐝𝐞 ✫

To foster personal growth, it's essential to release your overemphasis on ambition, control, and the pursuit of external success. These traits, while they may have brought you worldly achievements, can also distance you from the deeper emotional connections and fulfillment that truly enrich life. Moving toward your Cancer North Node invites you to embrace emotional connections, nurture relationships, and prioritize the well-being of yourself and your loved ones over material accomplishments. This path encourages you to find balance by valuing the heart as much as the mind and by cultivating a life that is both emotionally and spiritually fulfilling.

Capricorn South Node in the 1st House: Let go of the need to project a strong, controlled image; focus instead on cultivating a more emotionally open and nurturing identity that reflects your true self.

Capricorn South Node in the 2nd House: Release the habit of measuring your self-worth by material wealth and achievements; instead, find security in emotional connections and the simple joys of life.

Capricorn South Node in the 3rd House: Move beyond rigid, goal-oriented communication; embrace conversations that are emotionally engaging, compassionate, and focused on mutual understanding.

Capricorn South Node in the 4th House: Let go of the need to structure and control your home environment; focus on creating a warm, nurturing space that fosters emotional well-being and family connections.

Capricorn South Node in the 5th House: Release the tendency to approach creativity or romance with seriousness and control; instead, enjoy spontaneous, heartfelt expressions of love and creativity.

Capricorn South Node in the 6th House: Move away from a workaholic mindset and an overemphasis on discipline in your daily routines; instead, prioritize self-care, emotional health, and a balanced lifestyle.

Capricorn South Node in the 7th House: Let go of the need to dominate or control your relationships; focus on building partnerships that are emotionally supportive, caring, and rooted in mutual respect.

Capricorn South Node in the 8th House: Release the habit of controlling shared resources or maintaining emotional distance in intimate connections; embrace vulnerability and trust in your relationships.

Capricorn South Node in the 9th House: Move beyond a disciplined, rigid approach to spirituality and learning; instead, explore your beliefs through emotional experiences and nurturing wisdom.

Capricorn South Node in the 10th House: Let go of the need to define yourself by your career or public achievements; focus on finding fulfillment through family life, emotional connections, and nurturing your personal well-being.

Capricorn South Node in the 11th House: Release the focus on achieving status or control within social groups; instead, cultivate friendships and community ties that offer emotional support and shared understanding.

Capricorn South Node in the 12th House: Move away from a solitary, disciplined approach to spirituality; embrace practices that promote emotional healing, inner peace, and a connection to the divine.

✫ 𝐀𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐮𝐬 𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐍𝐨𝐝𝐞 ✫

To truly grow and evolve, it's important to release your tendencies toward emotional detachment, rebelliousness, and prioritizing group ideals over personal connections. While these traits may have served you in maintaining objectivity and individuality, they can also prevent you from experiencing the warmth, creativity, and deep connections that bring true fulfillment. Moving toward your Leo North Node encourages you to embrace personal expression, creativity, and the importance of close, heartfelt relationships. This journey is about finding joy in being uniquely yourself and in building meaningful connections with those around you.

Aquarius South Node in the 1st House: Let go of projecting a distant, intellectual persona; instead, develop a warm, confident presence that values personal expression and connection.

Aquarius South Node in the 2nd House: Release the habit of prioritizing abstract ideas over personal fulfillment; instead, cultivate self-worth through creative endeavors and tangible accomplishments.

Aquarius South Node in the 3rd House: Move beyond a detached, overly rational communication style; embrace expressive, heartfelt conversations that deepen personal relationships.

Aquarius South Node in the 4th House: Let go of maintaining emotional distance in your home life; focus on creating a warm, loving environment where personal connections are nurtured.

Aquarius South Node in the 5th House: Release the focus on group activities or intellectual pursuits; instead, explore your individuality through creative self-expression and personal joy.

Aquarius South Node in the 6th House: Move away from an impersonal approach to work and daily routines; instead, infuse your tasks with creativity and personal involvement.

Aquarius South Node in the 7th House: Let go of prioritizing intellectual compatibility over emotional connection in relationships; focus on building passionate, personally fulfilling partnerships.

Aquarius South Node in the 8th House: Release the habit of intellectualizing emotional and intimate matters; instead, embrace emotional depth and vulnerability in your closest relationships.

Aquarius South Node in the 9th House: Move beyond abstract ideals and philosophies; instead, embrace personal experiences and the joy of creative self-expression in your exploration of life’s meaning.

Aquarius South Node in the 10th House: Let go of seeking recognition through group efforts or intellectual achievements; focus on building a career that highlights your individual talents and creative contributions.

Aquarius South Node in the 11th House: Release the tendency to blend into group identities; instead, step into the spotlight and embrace your individuality and leadership.

Aquarius South Node in the 12th House: Move away from a detached, abstract approach to spirituality; instead, connect with your inner self through creative, heartfelt practices that bring joy and personal fulfillment.

✫ 𝐏𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐒𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐍𝐨𝐝𝐞 ✫

For personal growth, it's essential to let go of tendencies toward escapism, idealism, and avoiding practical realities. While these traits may have helped you connect with your imagination and spirituality, they can also keep you from achieving tangible success and stability in the material world. Moving toward your Virgo North Node invites you to embrace discipline, attention to detail, and a focus on practical solutions and tangible results. This path encourages you to balance your dreams with reality, creating a life that is both spiritually fulfilling and grounded in the here and now.

Pisces South Node in the 1st House: Let go of projecting an ethereal or dreamy image; instead, focus on developing a practical, organized approach to how you present yourself to the world.

Pisces South Node in the 2nd House: Release the habit of being overly idealistic or careless with your resources; instead, focus on building financial stability through disciplined management and practical planning.

Pisces South Node in the 3rd House: Move beyond vague or escapist communication; embrace clear, precise conversations that foster understanding and effective exchange of ideas.

Pisces South Node in the 4th House: Let go of the tendency to idealize or escape from family responsibilities; focus on creating a stable, orderly home environment that supports the well-being of all family members.

Pisces South Node in the 5th House: Release the need to lose yourself in creative fantasies or romantic illusions; approach your creative and romantic endeavors with practical planning and clear goals.

Pisces South Node in the 6th House: Move away from disorganized or inconsistent daily routines; instead, develop disciplined, efficient habits that support your health and productivity.

Pisces South Node in the 7th House: Let go of the tendency to idealize or avoid reality in relationships; focus on building partnerships that are grounded in mutual responsibility and clear communication.

Pisces South Node in the 8th House: Release the habit of avoiding deep emotional work or escaping into fantasy in matters of intimacy and shared resources; instead, embrace a practical, problem-solving approach to these areas.

Pisces South Node in the 9th House: Move beyond the desire to escape into abstract philosophies or spiritual fantasies; instead, focus on practical, real-world applications of your beliefs and seek knowledge that has tangible benefits.

Pisces South Node in the 10th House: Let go of the tendency to idealize or avoid taking concrete steps in your career; focus on setting realistic goals and working steadily towards achieving them.

Pisces South Node in the 11th House: Release the habit of losing yourself in utopian visions for social change; instead, focus on practical, actionable steps you can take to make a real difference in your community.

Pisces South Node in the 12th House: Move away from excessive escapism or isolation; instead, develop a grounded spiritual practice that includes daily routines and tangible acts of service.

Masterlist

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argentconflagration · 2 years ago

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when the subject of "why do people believe things that are seriously wrong and harmful" comes up it feels like you kinda hear one of two perspectives:

"oh, that's easy! it's because they're fundamentally Bad people who want to hurt others and choose their beliefs to justify that! :) hope this helps"

"they just don't have access to the same information we do. look at this person who was raised in a cult! don't you feel sorry for her?"

and like, yes, fine, some people were in fact raised in cults, but what i wish people would understand is that the bulk of it is just normal human flaws, like:

they want to believe stuff that makes them feel smart and cool and like they've figured everything out (you also do this)

they want to believe stuff that makes them feel like their emotions are justified and grounded in reality, and that the people they want to hurt deserve to be hurt (you also do this)

they form conclusions before they've processed all the relevant information, and cling to that first impression even when new info comes to light (you also do this)

they pick up beliefs from the people around them because they want to be liked and fit in, not because the beliefs are good or true (you also do this)

they come up with reasons that the stuff that benefits them (and the people they like and identify with) is actually overwhelmingly best for everyone and obviously the right thing to do (you also do this)

they pay more attention to stuff that supports what they already believe and avoid looking in places that might show them otherwise (you also do this)

they listen to people who talk like 'one of them' and ignore others (you also do this)

they come up with reasons to dismiss people with conflicting viewpoints as obviously in bad faith or ignorant or a shill or evil (you also do this)

they fail to take their own beliefs seriously sometimes, and take their beliefs way too seriously other times, in a selective way that lets them do the things they already wanted to do (you also do this)

the very ways they construct the ideas of 'knowledge' and 'wisdom' and 'belief' and 'understanding' are biased so that what they don't want to believe comes under lots of scrutiny and what they do want to believe receives less (you also do this)

you, dear reader, are presumably right about everything and were correct to die on every hill you've ever died on, but the difference between you and someone who's wrong about important stuff doesn't look like "well they're inherently evil and i'm not", it probably looks like a combination of:

natural environment (they would have been exposed to different information than you regardless of their choices)

being in the right place at the right time (your particular profile of flaws and virtues happened to be what was needed to lead you to the right conclusions, they had the opposite experience)

random luck (you doubled down on what felt right to believe but wasn't, but it turned out to be inconsequential, or even right for different reasons, while they doubled down on what turned out to be a horrible mistake distorting their entire worldview)

you do less of the things in the previous list, and over time the difference between you and them adds up

and, look, i also do these things. the nicest and most thoughtful people i've ever met do these things. if you meet someone who never does any of these things, i dunno, give them a fucking medal or something.

i know you're doing your best. we're all doing our best.

#loquacious lex

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salemlunaa · 4 months ago

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USING SATS FOR THE VOID OR ON ITS OWN:

a guaranteed “method”, where all that you desire is owed to you

IM BACK BITCHES!!!

DID YALL MISS MEEEE?? BC I MISSED YOU

anyway, i know i talk alot about not needing methods, and its true, you don’t need anything but yourself to tap in to the void/“I AM” state. However i dont really see SATS as a method and i think it’s great to consider when looking at loa and shifting

“what is SATS?”

you may ask, well, that is the abbreviation for the “state akin to sleep”

as you can see, the word “akin” means something of a similar nature to, so the state akin to sleep is basically the name to describe the lightheaded, woozy state before you go to bed bed

You can visualise what you want in this state, or you can affirm, you don’t need ten thousand affirmations, one can get the point across you’re a god and the operant power so even with one vague affirmation, your subconscious mind knows exactly what your talking about.

“when will i be able to see my results?”

you may also ask, and let me tell you it is guaranteed that you why what you want as soon as you wake up. This is why this “method” is popular in the loa community because it one of those where your subconscious mind is in full control.

An example of this could be Neville Goddard’s manifesting class. He asked that his students affirm/visualise climbing a ladder during SATS. He then told them to affirm against it during the day, telling themselves that they will NOT climb a ladder. He told his students not to come back if they didn’t climb a ladder and everyone returned.

This example just shows how powerful we can be when we let our subconscious mind take the wheel. All our doubts and fears cancel out and whatever we desire becomes real and no longer remains a desire. You can use this to enter the void, visualise your void and affirm for it and you will wake up there. You can do this for absolutely anything you desire. you can use SATS on its own, a lot of people just love the void so they use SATS to get there, but affirming for your dream life or visualising you waking up in the bed of your dream reality is another method other than the void.

A lot of you may struggle with this because you either, “can’t fall asleep” or you “fall asleep too quickly” while your mind was wondering and to that i say STAY DISCIPLINED!! The same way you would stay disciplined while studying for a test or while working a shift at your job is the same way you must stay disciplined while doing this method. It’s okay to “fail” the first time, and you’re more than allowed to feel upset waking back up in your shitty “reality”. But don’t beat yourself up about it and know that you can always do it again. You can simply decide that SATS is easy for you and it will reflect. always.

And as i always say, you don’t have to wait for the night to do this, ofcourse if you have things to do you don’t need to put them on hold but you don’t need to wait for the night to come, you. an fall into this state at ANY TIME OF DAY, so there goes another excuse for you to procrastinate. Now get to it love, because i KNOW that you can do this.

WAKING UP WITH YOUR DESIRES GUARANTEED SOUNDS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE, BUT DONT LET THAT SCARE YOU. 🔮💋

#salemlunaa #shiftblr #permashifting #reality shifting #shifting #law of assumption #success story #loa #void state #the void #void concept #the void state #voidstate #void state tips #state akin to sleep #respawning #shifters

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easy-there-leftovers · 5 months ago

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A Question Unasked

Written with season 1 Spencer in mind

Summary: In which your ambitious, workaholic nature makes Spencer wonder if you've got a crush on Hotch. This slight hitch in his plan causes him to miss a few signs.

[A/N]: Can be seen as a filler from Spencer's perspective of certain scenarios from "Mixed Messages" and a prequel to "As Cool As I Think I Am", but can also just be a standalone

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem! (mentored by Hotch!) reader | cw: slight spoilers for s1e04, allusion to inappropriate workplace dynamics (it's not true, relax lol), slight description of canon-typical violence, mildly inaccurate timeframe | word count: 4k

Spencer looks up from his endless stacks of files on his desk to look at the girl on the other side of his desk. Only a single carpeted walkway really separating them.

He could easily just get up and walk right to her. Ask the burning question that's been on his mind since the Arizona case, but he can't.

Why is that?

He's been your friend for a while, and he's known you for a while longer.

With his eidetic memory, he remembers so clearly when you first started working together. He remembers your starched blazer and pressed blouse, a stark contrast to his swimming-in-sweaters look, and how that alone let anyone know that you were serious about uniform and protocol.

You were, without a shadow of a doubt, one of the prettiest girls he had ever seen, and a fresh graduate just like him.

You were smart, beautiful, and started working at the BAU as early as he did.

And because you were new and young, one of the senior agents had been assigned to supervise your progress. So much like how he was mentored by Gideon, you had been mentored by the unit chief himself; Aaron Hotchner.

He'd like to think that he learned a lot from Gideon. He wasn't the type to hold his hand throughout a case, which he is thankful for, but he had been there to encourage him to think more outside the box. To let his mind be more flexible and creative. To see things from every conceivable angle. Leaving no stone unturned.

He supposed you learned a lot from Hotch as well. With your calm exterior, polite demeanor, and calculating mind that occasionally colored your less polite vocabulary-- He didn't know what Aaron must've been like in his junior years, but he supposed that having you as his colleague was essentially the same experience.

What he does know, however, is how close you are to your boss. Or is it your work?

Either way, you being glued to your work almost always meant that you were glued to him by proxy. You two being the first ones in and the last ones out showed that you spent three-percent more of your time with each other than the rest of the team, and two-percent more than with him.

Granted that had changed as of late, but still!

That didn't leave him a lot of time to ask you if---

"Dr. Reid, if you keep staring at me, I don't think you'll be able to finish your action reports on time." You had said without lifting your eyes from your folder.

Having been caught, he cleared his throat with a small 'sorry,' and directed his head back down to his still endless stack of files. The action earning a couple of chuckles from the bullpen where the rest of your colleagues had certainly seen, or at least heard, the exchange.

Not long after however, he saw Hotch from the corner of his eye lean over the railing outside his office. Calling for you both to meet him inside with his usual stern expression.

Spencer noticed how you got up, eyes still zeroed in on one of your files, and continued on your way up and into the unit chief's open door.

A clear sign that you had been invited there often enough that you didn't need to see where you were going.

You expected it.

He sighs and makes his way into the office as well. Dreading what the meeting could even be for, though he's confident he hasn't done anything wrong.

***

"As you might have noticed in our previous cases, I've paired you two to work on the more analytical aspects of it together. With these changes, we've been able to work twice as fast, and we’re thankful for the help."

Whatever Spencer had been expecting, it was not this. His raised eyebrows evidently agreed with him.

It wasn't everyday that Hotch complimented someone like this, much less in the proper environment. And if your respectful posture, but shining eyes in slight pride were anything to go off of, this was something new for you too.

As he was about to voice his thoughts, you had spoken up.

"Sir, Dr. Reid's knowledge in a wide array of subjects has certainly helped with our investigations. Though I'm afraid I haven't done much aside from ensuring it's accuracy and-"

"No! I mean--," He looked to see you already looking at him in slight confusion before continuing.

"She's been a huge help so far and has allowed me to exchange ideas with her to build a more accurate profile. Not to mention that her ability to mediate between departments has been beneficial to gaining access to pertinent information! So I think she's done plenty for the investigations as well." His voice dwindles as he realizes he's rambling on praises and he suddenly feels warm under the scrutiny of both his boss and his colleague.

He just didn't want anyone thinking you weren't doing anything by being humble. Especially since you're both so young.

Thankfully, it's Hotch who speaks up again after a beat.

"So what I'm hearing is that you're both satisfied with this arrangement?"

You both nod carefully and he smiles a small smile at that.

"Then we'll be carrying on with this pairing into the foreseeable future. Should there be any concerns about this arrangement, see to it that it goes through me. We can't afford to lose either of you." He says it with a finality that prompts both Spencer and you to leave with a nod, but the thought is instantly corrected when he speaks again.

"Oh and agent?" He looks only at you, but Spencer looks back as well out of instinct. "A private word, if you please."

Spencer sees you nod without a second thought and he takes it as his cue to hurriedly leave.

***

It hasn't been that long, Spencer argues with himself, since he left the unit chief's office. The blinds aren't drawn, he would know since he'd been looking at them periodically, so he also knows that nothing untoward is happening.

Yet something is bothering him about it.

From his position on his desk, he can see you and Hotch discussing something on his table very seriously, but he also sees how your eyes rarely leave the face of your superior. He can't quite see your expression due to the distance and the light, but he has this sinking feeling that it's a lot like the one from earlier.

He scoffs at the thought. If he wasn't thinking so rationally, he would've thought-

"Does she like Hotch?"

"Who likes Hotch?"

The new voice makes him whip his head back so fast to see Morgan with a confused face. Upon further examination, he sees him holding something that was definitely supposed to be flicked at him if he hadn't been caught so off guard.

He internally debates to voice his opinion, but he does anyway.

"Do you think that she likes Hotch?" He gestures with his eyes to their supervisor's office.

"You're asking me if I think 'little miss perfect' has a crush on a man that's hitched?" Derek echoes back with the use of your nickname. One that he coined as a playful jab at your no-frills behavior.

Spencer cringes when he hears it back though. He didn't ask this to get you in trouble, but it might come across that way now.

"Who has a crush on married man?" Elle joins in, and he only shrinks into his seat more.

"I'm not asking if she has a crush on him! I just want to know if she might like him and--what it is that she likes about him..."

The two exchange looks before looking back at him. Fully knowing that that's not the reason why he's asking, but they humor him anyway.

"Reid, what makes you think she likes him and not literally anyone else?"

"Well. there's her preference for prolonged eye-contact, a common indicator of interest for one. Her being in constant proximity to him, a sign that shows comfort in certain contexts, and then there's the amount of time they spend together."

The last one might be a bit of a reach, considering how you all work in the same area, but at this point he just wanted someone to tell him that he was either absolutely right, or crazy.

"Kid, that's crazy."

Duly noted.

"I'll say.” Elle chuckles out her response. “I haven't thought about it all, but those signs don't really mean anything. It just sounds like she has a habit of looking at whoever's talking to her." She notes, sharing her experience of being on the receiving end of your rather intense gaze.

His other friend adds onto that.

"And the whole closeness thing? You've seen her, she's like a computer with the way she works. She's a workaholic. And Hotch is another. It's just math, Reid."

Spencer furrows his eyes at the man's statement but before he can ask further, he sees you coming out of the office and staring at the small crowd that has now formed at his desk.

"Is something going on here?" You ask with tense brows. Eyes flickering to and fro.

He couldn't really think of something on the spot, but thankfully Derek had one at the ready. "Was just caught trying add my stack on to pretty boy's plate."

He sees you let out a small 'hm,' and you eventually turn your back to them to reach your desk.

He sighs in relief as he feels a firm pat on his back from Morgan.

"Next time, try looking at what she does when you're the one talking." He says before leaving to go to his own desk as well.

Spencer doesn't know what good that would do, especially now that he's worried one of his colleagues have caught wind of him liking you, but he at least takes note of it.

--------

He does not, in fact, take note of it until very later.

The team had been called to San Diego to deal with someone they had been calling, "The Tommy Killer." An unsub that had a preference for gluing his victims' eyes open.

As they were reviewing the scene in the jet, they had noticed a few stanzas of a literary work had been left behind at the scene.

"It's a ballad from the late 1600s. A Dialogue Betwixt Death and a Lady." Spencer had mentioned from where he stood.

"A 17th Century ballad?" Morgan had asked him incredulously from his seat, but it’s you who answers.

"One where a woman tries to bribe Death with all that she has in exchange for a little more time to live. Naturally, he doesn't allow it. Claiming that she was undeserving of an exception that even kings were denied of."

Spencer looks up from his own copy to see you still looking at your own from beside Hotch. With your brows furrowing in thought, he almost sees the actual gears in your brain turning.

"So what, are we looking at a literature professor of some kind?" Elle asks which immediately perks him right up.

"Well, actually anyone with access to the internet today. You should see what comes up when you type in the word, "Death" into a search engine." He laughed absentmindedly.

"Reid, no wonder you can't get a date."

Morgan's words made him frown, but he brushes it off.

Hotch, as previously discussed, then called on for the both of you to look deeper into the messages. To see if there was anything new that could be inferred.

He nods at him, and looks up. Expecting you to still be looking at Hotch as well.

Instead, your eyes meet his, but you quickly look back onto your file.

Reid thinks it's just a coincidence.

***

"Creepy, huh?" JJ had asked you two as she approached where transcripts of the written messages were tacked onto a board.

Spencer had been focusing so hard that he was caught off gaurd by her sudden appearance. Fully expecting the area to just be for you and him so he told her what first came to mind.

"Actually, conversations between Death and his victims was a fairly popular literary and artistic theme throughout the Renaissance."

Though perhaps the delivery wasn't as as good as he thought it was as JJ only stared back at him with an unreadable expression.

He thought it was interesting, really, but he supposed his slight stutter and breathy laugh at the end must have distracted her from his point.

He turned to look at you for help, but you too had been focusing on the messages and wouldn't be available to do that. So he just agreed with JJ’s sentiment, which seemed to be enough for her to leave.

He sighed out in relief.

"The lady never answers. Have you noticed it yet, Dr. Reid?" You turn to him as you ask.

He immediately refocuses on to the case and tries his best to reply after his prior blunder. "Oh uh-- Right, the dialogue in the ballad seems to be fractured. Well, it's more of a monologue than a dialogue seeing that there is no exchange of information."

A small smile graces your lips at that, and you gesture with a nod to go report your findings.

"So it is. Let's get going."

He follows you to where Hotch and Elle were discussing the sexual aspect of the crime and sees you take your place next to your mentor. The same position you were in when he was blowing out his birthday candles, as he also inserts himself into the discussion.

"Sir, we believe what the unsub has written at the scenes are most of the first three verses of the same ballad." You deliver, prompting your mentor to raise his brow at that.

"Most of?"

"Yeah, it's only one side of the conversation." Spencer adds. "There's no betwixt." He takes pride in your shared effort, which makes itself known by the smile that adorns his face.

Unfortunately, his satisfaction, isn't met with a positive reaction either as he sees Elle desperately trying not to make eye-contact, and your supervisor staring at him very pointedly.

He's thankful though at the little chuckle that you quickly try to hide behind a cough and a cover of your mouth to appear more professional. Quickly looking down at the ground.

He's happy that at least someone thought his joke was well-placed.

He continues to explain your theory about how the Lady in the narrative never answers, and that's enough for both Hotch and Elle to at least think about it.

Their attention is quickly stolen away however at an incoming call about a failed attempt nearby the precinct.

Quickly excusing themselves to get onto the scene as soon as possible, you see them call Gideon on their way out. Watching them as they leave the department doors.

But Spencer keeps his eyes on you as the thought just dawns on him.

You were the first one on the team to laugh at his jokes.

***

The more cases he works for the BAU, the more he realizes how much of his work isn't theoretical anymore. He feels it in the weariness in his eyes, the weight on his chest, and the shake of his hands.

Or maybe the shake is from the cold.

After all, he had dressed for the warm, California air. So now that he was in the cool, air-conditioned jet, he was seriously regretting not packing a sweater, at the very least.

He makes his way to the back of the aircraft after another successful investigation, and that's where sees you.

You had opted to shed your typically structured blazer on the seat beside you, leaving you in a softer blouse, both in color and form, that made everyone around you know that you were officially off duty.

It's a nice look on you, he thinks. A slight departure from your usually stern and hardened exterior. He wouldn't mind seeing a more relaxed version of you every once in a while.

A version of you that looked more your age and not constantly under the pressure of doing well.

He momentarily wonders if that's part of your mentor's influence as well.

He freezes a bit, as if catching himself in some depraved daydream, and takes a few steps back to return to the more vacant areas of the craft.

Before he can get any further though, you see him and beckon for him to come over with a tired wave of your hand.

"How's the flight treating you, Dr. Reid?" You ask, drowsiness lacing your tone as he sits on the seat opposite of you.

"Oh, it's the same as always, I guess. A little colder than usual, but that's to be expected. By the way, we’re actually lucky that we haven't experienced some semblance of turbulence yet on our flights, considering that the likelihood of it has increased by seventeen-percent in the last decade."

You laugh at that. "You really know just what to say, huh?"

He doesn't see it as funny as you do, so it seems. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you or--" "There's no need to apologize, sir. I find everything you have to say interesting, whether you mean it to or not."

He stays silent at that, suddenly nervous, and tries to make himself comfortable. He does so in the hopes that he can finally steel himself to ask you that question.

He talked to Elle earlier when they were waiting for the unsub's call. Asked her if she thought it was weird that he knew what he knew, and if it had anything to do with his inability to get a date. She had reasoned with him that it was because he didn't ask, but it couldn't be that simple, could it?

He mulls it over in his head before sighing. Opting to give up and just wait for a more opportune time.

Besides, jury’s still out that you could very well be pining over his boss.

The action, however, seems to remind you of something.

"Before I forget," You look into your baggage, rummaging around before finally finding what it was you were looking for.

You ask him to close his eyes, which he obediently does, and you place a thick rectangular box into his awaiting lap.

The sudden shift in weight causes his eyes to open, and he is certainly surprised to see what was on there.

"What is this?"

"It's your birthday. There wasn't a good time to give it to you, so might as well."

He takes the box into his hands and shakes it a little.

From the sound alone, or near lack thereof, there could be a multitude of things inside it. He looks at you questioningly and you only smile and gesture for him to open it.

He takes his time in doing so, and he doesn't know how or why, but he finds your reactions to his movements much more amusing than whatever could be in the box. As if you were more excited for him.

He finally peers into the now open box to see some sort of purple cloth. A ribbon of geometric designs cutting through its middle and he stares at it in wonder.

"It's a scarf!"

You smile at him, and he was thankful that the rest of the team were either asleep or just not paying attention as it allowed the both of you to savor the moment with at least some semblance of privacy.

"I've noticed that you had a tendency to wear a lot of layers. I wasn't sure if it was because you were cold, or you just liked dressing that way, so I made an educated guess and got you something practical."

And just like that, he's over the moon.

He immediately goes to put it on with a wide smile, paying no mind that it paired so badly with the short sleeves of his button up.

Not that he would know, nor care.

And just when he had been feeling cold earlier too! "Thank you so much. This means a lot to me, especially since you don't usually give gifts."

You shake your head. "I don't, but it's not everyday one spends their twenty-fourth at the BAU."

He continues to observe the cloth that now hung around him. Smoothing his hands over it as he does with an expression unreadable to you.

You worry a bit and hurriedly mention, "I'm sorry if it isn't your color. I see purple show up on your mismatched socks more than any other color, so I just assumed. If it's any consolation, purple is a great color to contrast the warmer hues in brown eyes?"

He flushes at your admission, but matches your urgency to set you straight. "No! Please, I actually really like it-- It's beautiful."

You breathe out a sigh in relief and nod slowly at that.

"Speaking of the color, did you know the origin of purple dye is actually quite fascinating?" His voice filled with enthusiasm. With his eyes, bright, and filled with a child-like fascination that makes your chest feel warm at the sight.

"Historically, purple dye was incredibly rare and valuable, which is why it became associated with royalty and nobility. The earliest known purple dye, known as Tyrian purple, was produced by the ancient Phoenicians around 1200 BC. It was derived from the secretions of a particular type of sea snail, the bolinus brandaris, found in the Mediterranean Sea."

He paused for a moment, wondering if he was boring you, but sees that you're still very much paying attention to him.

"The process to obtain this dye was incredibly labor-intensive and complex. It required thousands of these sea snails to produce just a small amount of dye. The snails would then be collected and left to decompose in large vats. After several days, a gland from the snail was extracted and crushed to produce a purple mucus. This mucus would then be exposed to sunlight, undergoing a chemical reaction that transformed it into the deep, rich purple dye we commonly associate with our modern day equivalent."

As he kept going, he suddenly remembered what Morgan had told him all those weeks ago.

"Next time, try looking at what she does when you're the one talking."

So he does just that.

He observes the way that your shoulders are more relaxed, how your eyes never stray from him, and how the small upturned curve of your lip makes itself known as you rest your cheek onto your propped up fist.

How he has your undivided attention and yet you don't even look the least bit bored of what he has to say. Only silently appreciating and subtly nodding along with the slow blink of your eyelids.

All clear signs of unguarded comfort, and or interest, in his presence.

Had you really been looking at him like that all this time?

Now the idea of you liking your boss seems silly. Especially when you’re looking at him the way he imagines himself looking at you.

"I did know that, actually, Dr. Reid. At the time, Tyrian purple wasn't only desirable for its rarity, people said it was also incredibly lightfast. That it was resistant to fading under the sun and the weather. Not to mention all that hard work that just to get a single gram of it. Then again, modern studies do claim that its lightfastness was, in fact, not an accurate feature as it's color diminished when it was exposed to light and UV radiation."

You laughed a little again, as if remembering some anecdote, and that sound was steadily becoming one of his favorite sounds. Following only after your speaking voice.

"Fortunately for you, doctor, I could only afford a synthetically purple-dyed scarf. Though that means that you won't ever have to worry about it fading under the sun."

Hands up in faux surrender, you give him a tired smile that he returns with one of his own.

A calming silence enveloped the both of you as you continue to bask in each other's presence.

At some point you doze off, draping your blazer on top of yourself to shield yourself from the cold, and that's when he starts considering Elle's words again.

"Do you ever ask anyone out?"

"No,"

"That's why you can't get a date."

He nods to himself, and reclines a little more into his seat. Snuggling into his new scarf that still has the faintest smell of you.

Maybe he will ask you out on a a date later.

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dreamlifebunny · 1 year ago

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how to script your dream life and use it with any method!

hello friends! today i want to share with you how i personally script my dream life, and how this script is both my void list, states list, and precursor to almost every manifestation method i've ever used. i love scripting because it is not only a method in and of itself but it is also a simple list of everything you desire that you can now manifest using any method you love!

check back later for a link to my scripting templates. in the meantime, here are the steps to creating your perfect script from scratch with examples! all you need is a place to write it down.

step one:

time to brain dump! at the top of your page, write out every desire that comes to your head in list format. don't overthink it and don't worry if they sound silly or unrealistic; remember, absolutely anything is possible! you can write out a few desires to start or go hardcore and write out hundreds, whatever you feel inspired by. you can always come back to this step later. here is my example:

step two:

now its time to get organized! look at the desires you've written and figure out what subcategories they fall under. for example, "my eyes are light blue and gorgeous" could fall under the category of "appearance," and "i have $100,000 in my bank account" could fall under the category of "wealth and items." feel free to use any category name that makes sense to you.

step three:

now that you have a couple of categories written out and understand the structure of the script, your mind might start to have even more ideas. "ooh, now that i see revision is a category, there are a couple more things i'd like to revise..." or "why stop at one SP when i could have everyone chasing after me?" for step three, we go a little deeper into these categories and add more details of what our dream life will look like. you can also add new categories that pop into your head - in the example below, i've added "the world and society" and "skills and abilities."

note: the reason why i broke this up into multiple steps instead of just writing "write out all your desires at once" is because our brains can be mean to us and make us procrastinate if something isn't done "perfectly," so that's why adding an extra step is important to bypass the perfectionism.

optional steps:

because scripting is such a creative and expansive process, we might think of ideas we'd like to manifest in the future but not right now/not instantly. i like to organize my script further by adding another category: "future manifestations." these are ideas that i would love to manifest at some point later on but not necessarily while my dream life is manifesting right now.

another idea is separating categories even further into "instant manifestations" (manifestations that happen right now without things needing to unfold) or "perfect timing manifestations" (manifestations that slowly unfold naturally and linearly), if you want to get specific about how they show up in your life! however, these steps are completely optional and just fun details for specificity, and i can make a more detailed post on this later.

how you can use your script with any method:

scripting has been used as a successful manifesting and shifting method on its own forever because it specifically addresses one of the most important steps in the manifesting process - deciding what you want! by writing out what you want in your dream life, you can now decide that your script will manifest on its own or you can use any method under the sun to fulfill yourself within:

the void state: if you enter the void state to manifest, you could affirm "i have everything in my dream life script"

affirming: you can affirm "everything in my dream life script has come true"

visualization: you could create an imaginative scene where all of your desires from your script are fulfilled, or you can imagine looking at your script and smiling because everything came true

subliminals: you can create a very simple subliminal where all of your desires are included, or even a sub where the only affirmation is "i have everything in my dream life script"

the possibilities with scripting are absolutely endless. i hope that this guide has given you the inspiration and direction to write your own wonderful and unique script. now, go and get your dream life!

have fun! bunny 💕

#law of assumption #neville goddard #manifestation #edward art #manifesting #loa #loassumption #dream life #scripting #reality shifting #manifest #master manifestor #dream girl #that girl #bunny's originals #script

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thewriteadviceforwriters · 4 months ago

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Villains vs. Antagonists (Guide For Writers)

Hey there, fellow writers and wonderful members of the writeblr community! 📚✍️ It's Rin here and...

Today, we're diving into a topic that's close to many writers' hearts: villains and antagonists. These characters often steal the show, driving our plots forward and giving our heroes something to push against. But here's the thing – while these terms are often used interchangeably, they're not quite the same. So, let's unpack this, shall we?

First things first, let's break down the difference between a villain and an antagonist. It's a distinction that can really elevate your storytelling game!

An antagonist is simply a character (or force) that opposes your protagonist. They're the obstacle, the challenge, the thing standing in the way of your main character achieving their goal. Here's the kicker: an antagonist doesn't have to be evil. They could be a rival love interest, a stern parent, or even nature itself.

A villain, on the other hand, is a specific type of antagonist. They're the bad guy, the evildoer, the character with malicious intent. All villains are antagonists, but not all antagonists are villains. Mind-blowing, right?

Let's look at some examples to make this clearer:

In "Romeo and Juliet," the feuding families are antagonists, but they're not villains. They oppose the protagonists' desire to be together, but they're not evil.

In "Harry Potter," Voldemort is both an antagonist and a villain. He opposes Harry (making him an antagonist) and he's also evil (making him a villain).

In "Cast Away," the island and the challenges of survival are the antagonists. There's no villain in sight!

Now that we've got that sorted, let's dive deeper into how to create these characters and use them effectively in your writing.

Creating Antagonists:

Define their opposition: What specifically does your antagonist do to oppose your protagonist? This could be physical, emotional, or ideological opposition.

Give them a reason: Why are they standing in your protagonist's way? Even if it's not justified, there should be a reason that makes sense to the antagonist.

Make them strong: Your antagonist should be a worthy opponent. They need to pose a real challenge to your protagonist to keep things interesting.

Consider their perspective: Remember, your antagonist is the hero of their own story. Try writing a scene from their point of view to understand them better.

Create contrast: Your antagonist should in some way contrast with your protagonist. This could be in values, methods, or personality.

Creating Villains:

Establish their evil: What makes your villain "bad"? Is it their actions, their beliefs, or both?

Develop their backstory: How did they become evil? A compelling villain often has a tragic or twisted history.

Give them dimensions: Pure evil can be boring. Give your villain some complexity – maybe they love their cat or have a soft spot for classical music.

Create a strong motivation: What drives your villain? Greed? Revenge? A twisted sense of justice? The stronger and more relatable the motivation, the more compelling your villain will be.

Make them smart: Your villain should be clever enough to pose a real threat. They should be able to anticipate and counter your protagonist's moves.

Now, let's talk about how to use these characters in different genres. Because let's face it, a villain in a romance novel is going to look very different from one in a fantasy epic!

In Romance: Antagonists in romance are often rivals for the affection of the love interest, or perhaps societal norms or family expectations standing in the way of true love. Villains are less common, but when they appear, they might be abusive exes or manipulative friends trying to sabotage the relationship.

Tip: In romance, make sure your antagonist's motivations are clear and relatable. We should understand why they're opposing the main relationship, even if we don't agree with their methods.

In Fantasy: Fantasy is ripe for both antagonists and villains. You might have a Dark Lord seeking to conquer the world (classic villain) or a rival magic user competing for the same goal as your protagonist (antagonist).

Tip: In fantasy, world-building is key. Make sure your antagonist or villain fits logically into the world you've created. Their powers, motivations, and methods should all make sense within the rules of your fantasy realm.

In Mystery/Thriller: In these genres, your antagonist is often the perpetrator of the crime your protagonist is trying to solve. They might not be evil (maybe they committed a crime of passion), or they could be a full-fledged villain if their crimes are particularly heinous.

Tip: In mysteries, your antagonist needs to be clever enough to challenge your detective protagonist. Leave subtle clues about their identity or motives, but make sure they're smart enough to almost get away with it.

In Literary Fiction: Here, antagonists are often more abstract. They might be societal expectations, personal flaws, or even time itself. Villains in the traditional sense are less common, but morally grey characters who oppose the protagonist are frequent.

Tip: In literary fiction, focus on the nuances of your antagonist. They should be as complex and flawed as your protagonist, with their own rich inner life.

In Sci-Fi: Science fiction offers a wide range of possibilities for antagonists and villains. You might have alien invaders, oppressive governments, or even well-meaning scientists whose creations have gone awry.

Tip: In sci-fi, make sure your antagonist or villain is consistent with the technological and social aspects of your imagined world. Their methods and motivations should make sense within the context of your sci-fi setting.

Now, let's dive into some tips to make your antagonists and villains the best they can be in your novel:

Make them believable: Whether you're writing a mustache-twirling villain or a morally grey antagonist, their actions and motivations should make sense within the context of your story and their character.

Give them a personal connection to the protagonist: The conflict becomes much more engaging when it's personal. Maybe your antagonist and protagonist used to be friends, or they're fighting over the same goal.

Show their impact: Don't just tell us your antagonist is a threat – show us the consequences of their actions. Let us see how they affect your protagonist and the world of your story.

Give them wins: Your antagonist or villain should have some successes along the way. If they're always failing, they won't seem like a credible threat.

Humanize them: Even if you're writing a truly evil villain, give them some humanizing traits. Maybe they have a pet they dote on, or a tragic backstory that explains (but doesn't excuse) their actions.

Make them adaptable: A good antagonist doesn't stick to one plan. When the protagonist foils them, they should be able to come up with new strategies.

Give them their own character arc: Your antagonist or villain should grow and change throughout the story, just like your protagonist does.

Use them to highlight your protagonist's strengths and weaknesses: Your antagonist should challenge your protagonist in ways that force them to grow and change.

Consider their presentation: How do other characters react to your antagonist? How do they present themselves to the world versus who they really are?

Don't forget about henchmen: If you're writing a villain, consider giving them some underlings. This can add depth to their character and provide more challenges for your protagonist.

Remember, whether you're crafting a dastardly villain or a complex antagonist, these characters are crucial to your story. They're the ones who push your protagonist to grow, who raise the stakes, and who often drive the plot forward.

But here's a gentle reminder: while it's important to make your antagonists and villains compelling, be mindful of the impact your writing might have. If you're dealing with heavy themes or traumatic events, handle them with care and sensitivity.

Now, I know we've covered a lot of ground here, and you might be feeling a bit overwhelmed. That's okay! Writing complex characters is a skill that develops over time. Don't be afraid to experiment, to try different approaches, and to revise and refine your antagonists and villains as you go.

One exercise I find helpful is to write a short story from your antagonist's or villain's point of view. This can help you understand their motivations better and ensure they feel like real, three-dimensional characters.

Another tip: watch movies or read books in your genre and pay special attention to how they handle antagonists and villains. What works well? What doesn't? How can you apply these lessons to your own writing?

Remember, there's no one "right" way to create these characters. What matters is that they serve your story and engage your readers. Trust your instincts, and don't be afraid to push boundaries or subvert expectations.

As you work on your antagonists and villains, keep in mind that they're not just there to make life difficult for your protagonist. They're an integral part of your story's ecosystem. They shape the plot, influence character development, and often reflect themes or ideas you're exploring in your work.

And remember, writing is a journey. Your first draft of an antagonist or villain might not be perfect, and that's okay. The beauty of writing is in the revision, in the gradual sculpting of characters until they leap off the page.

Lastly, don't forget to have fun with it! Creating antagonists and villains can be some of the most enjoyable parts of writing. Let your imagination run wild, explore the darker sides of human nature, and see where your characters take you.

I hope this deep dive into antagonists and villains has been helpful and inspiring. Remember, you've got this! Your unique voice and perspective will bring these characters to life in ways no one else can.

Happy writing! 📝💖 - Rin. T

Before you go, why not join us at The Write Right Society? We're a supportive Tumblr community where writers lift each other up. Whether you're a newbie or a pro, we'd love to have you! Share your work, get feedback, and connect with fellow wordsmiths, writers and aspiring authors.

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