#shit talking me and harassing my sister all at once

[isabeauwolf]

Pregnant reader x Trafalgar Law

Chapter 1 - Coffee and Confessions

You worked at the small coffee shop down the block from the hospital on one the The Grandlines infamous Winter Islands, it snowed most of the year, except for the rare two month for spring and summer, then goes back to cold, winter once again.

You always loved the snow, watching the flakes fall from outside your window as you curled up on your couch with a cup of hot chocolate, your favorite blanket, good book and the puppy you just adopted naming him Onigiri.

Oh, sure it got super busy and you had to work most holidays, but it was worth it.

Why?

The famous, cold, stoic and handsome Surgeon himself, Doctor Trafalgar Law become one of your regulars. You heard his nicknames whispered underneath people breaths, "The Surgeon of Death" and "Doctor Heart Stealer" to name a few.

Twenty-six, handsome, doctor and single?

How in the world was this man still on the market you never know, but he was easy to talk to.

Well, somehow you two had become closer after the embarrassing questionnaire you two had while off the clock at work eight months ago.

You were fine until you excused yourself to go throw up in the nearest bathroom. Thank god, you packed a travel size toothpaste, toothbrush and mouthwash in your purse since you had spend the night with Jess last night after work.

Jess is your co-worker and best friend, she knew of your secret crush on the Doctor. And like the idiot that you were decided to scroll through tinder, hook up for a one night stand and.... your face paled, no.

No, oh no.

Fuck, oh my fucking god. No.

What? How? You were on the pill! You used condoms! Fuck.

You looked at yourself in the mirror in horror, inwardly screaming, Oh god, I'm pregnant! You wanted to bang your head against one of the bathroom stalls. "Okay, calm the hell down, Y/n." You whispered to yourself, hands gripping the edges of the sink hard. "Everything will be fine."

A knock on the door made you jolt, knots hitting your belly. "Who is it?" You asked, voice wavering.

"Y/n, it's me." Jess' voice calls from the other side of the door. "You've been in there for a minute." Worry in her tone as she whispered. "Can I come in? I've got Max covering the counter."

"Yeah." You sniffed, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand. Unlocked the bathroom door, let Jess in and closed it, re-locking it.

"You look like shit." Jess joked gently, hoping to get you to laugh.

"Thanks, ha ha," you muttered, leaning against the wall, sliding down, knees against your chest, crossed your arms over your chest, bury your head in your arms and cried. "Dammit, Jess, I fucked up."

"Hey, hey, shush," Jess kneeled beside you, rubbing your back. "What happened? Was your hookup harassing you?" She asked, immediately growing defensive. "I thought he didn't do repeat hookups?"

You mentally scoffed, if only. "No, that's not it." You sighed, meeting her emerald green eyes. "I think... I'm pregnant." You muttered, biting your lower lip.

Jess' eyes grew wide. "What?! But I thought you were on the pill and he wrapped it! Are you sure!"

You immediately covered her mouth with your hands, glaring. "I am and he did." You hissed, "Please, keep your voice down. I don't want the whole staff and our customers to know."

Jess nodded her head and you lowered you hands and ran your hands through your hair.

All of this started because you were too shy to ask Dr Sexy out, like a coward, you hoped to get a good lay out of your system and instead, ended up pregnant. If your mother and older sister ever found out, you knew they wouldn't judge you since both of them got knocked up while they were both sixteen. At least you were twenty-four, like that was any better.

Single, unmarried and now pregnant.

Those three words rang in your head over and over.

Hitting harder.

"Damn," Jess nudged you lightly, siting down beside you. "I thought you wanted to let off some steam for Mr Grumpy Pants, but instead you got lost too deep in that wild night, huh?"

"Your telling me." You closed your eyes. Dammit, how were you going to face Law again? Would he find you gross? Look at you like you were a harpy? You hoped not. You really hoped he wouldn't think any less of you.

"Hey, I know that look." Jess pointed you in the forehead, "Stop being a negative Nancy and get out of your head." She pointed over her shoulder, "Besides, Dr Sexy is waiting for his order. You know he only wants you to take his order." She gives you a smirk. "I think he's crushin' on you hard."

"No, he doesn't." You fired back, frowning. "If he did. I'd gladly be having his baby instead." You blinked, grew flustered and covered your mouth. "Forget I said that."

Jess hummed, smirking. "Yup, your type are bad boys with dark hair, dark eyes and tats." The raven haired woman, offered you her hand, which you took as she helped you up. "What was baby daddy's name again?" She raised a brow, "Ace?"

"Yeah," You frowned, instinctively placing your hand over your abdomen. You immediately thought of the biker with black hair, charcoal eyes, bright smile and adorable freckles on his face. Sure, Ace was hot and easy to talk to, but you both agreed that that night was a one time thing. Besides he was long gone and on the road with his brothers Luffy and Sabo in their biker gang, ASL. It would be best to not tell him, even if, you kept his number in your phone. "He was a gentleman and a nice guy but..." You trailed off, frowning deeper.

"He's no Trafalgar Law, right?" Jess pulled you into a side hug and nodded. "I get it."

Another knock outside of the bathroom door sounded. "Is everything okay in there? Y/n-ya?" His monotone drawl called, a hint of concern in his tone.

Speak of the drop dead sexy doctor and he shall appear.

Oh no. You didn't want to go back out there. Law was observant, he would know something was wrong, you knew it.

"Y-yeah.. I'll be right out Law." You panicked and stuttered like a dumbass. You met your friends gaze with wide eyes as your breath hitched, nerves clawing at your belly again and you held yourself tighter, whisper underneath your breathe. "I'm not ready, Jess."

"Alright. Call me, if you need anything." Law replied, "I'm off work for the rest of the day and will be hanging out for a bit." With that he walked away, returning towards the counter, waiting.

Stubborn man.

"Come on," Jess stood and helped you up. "I'll run to the pharmacy real quick and grab you a test while you and give Dr insomniac his coffee."

You nodded and reached for your purse, grabbing your wallet when Jess' hand lightly touched yours.

"No, I'll pay for it. It's the least I can do." She winked, "I know you'd do the same for me."

You nodded again, wiping your face with the back of your free hand and rewashed your hands. "Thanks, Jess." You met her reflection in the mirror, offering her a sheepish smile. "I'll owe you a coffee on our next girls trip."

Jess' smile widens. "You know it." She unlocked the bathroom and went out, announces. "She's coming Law!"

You bit your lip, holding back a snicker at your friends innuendo to try and make the Doctor's face fluster. After repacking everything into your purse, you took a deep breath and walked out.

You saw the back of Jess' head as she went out the door after throwing on her thick black and blue ski jacket with her white gloves and matching scarf you bought her last year for Christmas.

You felt Law's eyes on you as you made your way back to the employee's locker room. You inwardly shivered and felt embarrassed as your cheeks heated up, clutching your purse tighter to your chest. Your mouth had become dry as you shoved your purse back into your locker, pulled out your water bottle to gulp down a few heavy sips, then put it back into your overnight bag your brought with you from last night.

Quickly applying hand cream on your hands and shoving it into your pocket with you phone and retied your apron, you went back out onto the floor with your best business and cheer smile.

There he was.

Your crush, Trafalgar Law. Sporting a black turtle neck sweater, his spotted print faded washed denim jeans, white and spotted printed hat (which cutely reminded you of a snow leopard) he always wears when he's off duty and his black boots. He had rolled up the sleeves of his shirt, rolling them up to his elbows, showing off his tats and had his arms crossed over his chest. Leaning against the wall, his long legs crossed at the ankles, looking bored as he glanced down at his smart watch.

Dr Heart Stealer was hard to read most of the time, but it was clear that he was worried with the nervous tapping he was doing with his inked index finger against his forearm. The stoic and cold surgeon could come off as intimating at first, but it was clear that he had a dark past since he never really talked about himself, mostly his work and his annoying coworkers: Penguin, Shachi and Bepo.

You had seen them from time to time as Penguin and Shachi loved to tease Law and were two trouble makers, but his childhood friends. Bepo was a literal polar bear in the form of a man, shaggy blond hair, blue eyes, a sensitive soul and very loyal towards his friends. He was also Jess's not so secret crush. Bepo was a giant, even taller than Law, which was impressive. What he was doing in the medical field you will never know.

You stepped behind the counter, putting on new gloves, grabbed the stores tablet, flickering your nervous gaze on the man of the hour as Law met your stare, shoved his hands into his pockets and pushed himself off the wall, casually walking towards you.

You could honestly get lost in Law's stunning silver eyes. His dark sense of humor was funny. You are always reminded how much he towers of you as he approached and stopped at the counter.

"Are you feeling unwell, Y/n-ya?" His professional mask of stoicism was present, but you could have sworn.. he was frowning?

"I could be better, but I'm okay, thank you, Law." You replied, snapping out of your daze and refocusing your attention back on the tablet in your hands. "Would you like your usual for tonight?"

Law's slight frown deepens.

Shit, he didn't like that.

"I may be off the clock, but I still am a Doctor… if you ever need me Y/n-ya." He whispers, leaning against the counter, his usual stern tone was gentle and genuine.

Oh lord, please have mercy. Your hands tightened around the tablet, pressing it against your chest, growing flustered as you take a calm and steady breath. "I appreciate it, Law…" How the hell can you tell him no? You can't. "My shift is almost over…" You stare deep into his pooling sterling, stormy orbs. "I do have a few personal questions.. if you are willing to listen?" Dammit, I caved!

You mentally wanted to face palm yourself and scream in horror, but you kept your mouth shut.

Law's mood brightened a tad, it was small, but noticeable. The twinkle in his eye and the way his lips twitched into that familiar and bewitching smirk that had you swoon and mentally fan yourself. "I'll be waiting with my usual order then, thank you, Y/n-ya."

How can his lazy drawl sound so smooth at the same time? It wasn't fair!

"Thank you for your order, Law." You replied, lowering your gaze to type in the order you knew by heart and told him the order and total. "Medium black roast with a triple shot of espresso and cream. That will be six-fifty, please."

He pulled out his wallet from his back pocket, put his debit card into the card reader and typed in the pin.

You gave him his receipt.

Your hands brushes lightly as your heart thudded harder in your chest.

Law stiffened, then took his copy of the receipt and sat down at the back of the coffee shop, his usual spot. It was private, but he had full view of the shop.

You made his drink as Jess came back.

Oh boy.

You closed your eyes and counted to three as you walked out from behind the counter and slowly made your way towards Jess to grab the small paper brown bag, whispering your thanks and turned in Law's direction.

Law's gaze trailed curiously towards the bag. It was private and rude to stare, but he couldn't help it. Were you sick? What did you need so badly that you couldn't go get it yourself?

The more Law thought about your health, the more inwardly concerned he became and he'd accidentally gotten himself worked up. But decided not to say anything for now.

You set his drink down as you glanced at the clock. It was 6pm, the end of your shifts. "Here's your coffee, Law." You smile at him, hand tightening around the brown bag. "I'll be back, excuse me." You quickly turned on your heels and rushes back into the bathroom.

Law wanted to follow you and ask what was wrong, but remained seated and reached for his coffee in hope the drink could help settle his nerves. Reminded himself that it wasn't his business, it didn't concern him. He couldn't help it, this unsettling feeling that something was wrong.

Jess came back out of the break room, drawing Law's attention as he noticed the worried look on her face.

He was tempted to ask.

A few minutes later you came out of the bathroom, tears in your eyes.

It made his heart ache.

He wished he could comfort you.

He observed as you held the brown paper bag in your hand and whispered to your friend who frowned and gave you a hug.

Law's grip on his drink tightened, his hat covering his eyes.

He heard someone approaching and recognized your black and white tennis shoes, forcing his gaze to meet yours. Your eyes were still red and puffy from crying and you looked nervous as you nibbled on your bottom lip, grip tightening and wrinkling the paper back. "What's wrong, Y/n-ya?" He asked slowly, he couldn't keep quiet any longer, he had to know.

"May I sit down with you Law?" You ask softly.

He nodded, "Of course, here." He gesturing across from him at the empty seat, standing, walking around, pushing out your seat and waited to push you in. "Is here okay or would you like to talk more in private?"

You were hesitant. "Can you come with me into the break room?"

"Very well." He pushed the chair back in, grabbed his drink, backpack, coat and followed after you. "Is it okay for me to go back there?" He didn't want to get you into trouble.

"Max said it was okay since it was an emergency." You replied without glancing over your shoulder, you reached the break room and were about to reach for the door knob when Law's hand was faster, opening it and holding it open for you. "Thank you, Law." You gave him a sheepish smile and entered first.

He once again helped you into your chair when you blurted out. "Can you become my doctor?"

He wasn't expecting that. "I can see if I have any opens available." He answered, raising a brow. "What for Y/n-ya?" His silver gaze scanned you from head to toe, apart from crying, he noticed that you had gained a bit of weight which didn't both him. "Why me?"

"I trust you Law." You admitted.

It made his heart skip a beat and a hint of a blush rise across his cheeks. "I appreciate it, thank you." He muttered, he raised a hand out of habit, covering his eyes with his spotted hat. Clearing his throat as he leaned back in his chair, crossed his legs, grabbed his coffee and took a sip.

You took a deep breath and figured you'd go ahead and get it out of the way. Rip it off like a band aid.... a really big, one. "I'm pregnant."

Law nearly choked on his coffee, drops of the hot liquid left his mouth. He swallowed quickly, coughing as he covered his mouth with the back of his hand. "Excuse me?" He sputtered, scanning your face for a hint of a joke or a lie.

He found none.

You felt so bad. Speed walking towards the coffee machine, grabbing a handful of naps and handed them to him. "I... probably could have said that better, huh?" You blushed deeply.

"Th-thank you." He coughed, using them to wipe his mouth, chin and hands. "I didn't know you were seeing anyone."

"I'm still single yes." You admitted, glancing away as you sat back down. "It was a casual hookup a couple of weeks ago." You tilted you head. "No about a month ago." You opened the brown paper back and pulled out the pregnancy test and laying it on the table, resting your hands in your lap.

Law stared down at the test. "Did you not use protection or are not on birth control?" Sure enough, their were two blue lined on the test, showing that it was positive.

He shouldn't be upset. You are an adult and he wasn't your boyfriend. This still wasn't an easy pill to swallow either, yet he couldn't abandon you. It took a lot of courage to tell him, to trust and open up to him.

"We did." You muttered, hands clapped tightly. "And I am."

Law took off his hat, running his inked hand through his scruffy black locks. "Both aren't one hundred percent."

You nodded. "Perhaps it's that strong D clan genes." You joked, but it seems to have unnerved Law. You wondered why?

That made Law pause, his eyes widen. "Your hookup is a member of the D Clan?"

"Yes," You nodded again. "Portgas D Ace." You picked up the test, held it in your hand, stood to your feet and walked over to the trashcan, threw both the test and paper bag away and leaned against the counter. "I think, if I remember right you know his little brother don't you?"

Law had heard of StrawHat talking about his older brother.

From what Law remembers Ace was Luffy's half brother from his Mother Rouge remarrying Monkey D Dragon when Ace was three. Her first husband Gol D Roger has died from an illness before Ace was born, Luffy was born not long after and they had adopted Sabo.

He does recall Luffy shoving his phone in Law's face when StrawHat was back in town last month, showing off pictures of his adventures with his brothers. He never saw Ace in person. It made Law secretly jealous that Ace had caught your eye.

He supposed Ace is considered attractive with him being taller than Luffy and had more muscle, same stupid happy go lucky trade mark smile or that mischievous smirk he shared with his brothers.

Ace was known to be more polite.

And yet, Law still felt the burning coals of jealous and envy towards the bastard.

Law felt his hand tighten around his hat before he shoved it away in the back of his mind. "Do you plan on keeping the baby?" He asked softly, meeting your eyes.

You placed a hand on your abdomen. "Yes, I don't have the heart to get rid of the baby."

"What about adoption?" Why was he prying? It wasn't any of his business.

"I'm not sure yet." You turned untying your apron and putting it in your lockers. Slipping on your heavy winter coat and untying your hair, ruffling it a bit and sighed. "Thanks for not judging me by the way."

Law's jaw clenched tight, then relaxed. "Your welcome." He stood, threw his backpack over his shoulder, downing the rest of his coffee, threw it away and talked towards the sink to wash his hands. He'd sneak a peak at you as you finished gathering what looked like a small black and purple duffel bag and your purse. "Where'd you go last night?"

"Slept the weekend at Jess' and came straight to work." You faced him smiling.

God, if you knew what that smile did to him.

Law dried his hands and pulled out his cell phone. "Here's my number, if you ever need anything or have any questions. I'll see, if I can squeeze you in first thing in the morning."

"Are you sure?" You blinked. "I don't want to take anyone's spot in case the hospital needs you."

Law smirks that sexy smirk of his again. "I'm sure they can manage." He opened the door for you again as you walked through and he followed, watching as you put on a white beanie with pink hearts on with a matching scarf and gloves.

He wasn't going to say it out loud but apart from his beloved leopard print clothes, anything with hearts on it was a close favorite of his. It reminded him of his adoptive father Rosinante Donquixote. He supposed it gave him nostalgia and comfort, made himself smile whenever he saw the design.

It suited you.

You took out your own phone, adding him to your contacts, saved it and handed it back to him. "Thanks again, Law."

"No problem, Y/n-ya." He replied, tilting his head. "Aren't you going to give me yours?" He held his phone in his hand, fingers hovering over the screen.

You blinked, growing flustered. Oh, right. "Oh, here." You repeated your phone number that you made yourself rewrite and repeat over and over until it stuck.

You lead the way, wishing Jess and Max goodnight as you exited the coffee shop.

The street lamps were bright and shining against the dark sky. The world was covered in a layer of white, big fat flakes fell slowly as you smiled. Closing your eyes, breathing in the chilling winter night air, holding it in your lings and exhaled, reopening them to watch your breath puff into a cloud of fog and vanish.

Law felt him own mouth tug into a ghost of a smile.

Feeling his stare you turned towards him, meeting his beautiful and steamy silver gaze as he zipped up his black winter coat with bright orange spots trailing at the bottom, and his beloved spotted hat back in place on top of his head.

"I'll see you in the morning then?" You muttered, half turning to head in the direction towards your apartment.

"Yes, I suppose I will won't I?" Law tipped his hat towards you and walked away in the opposite direction, the sound of crunching snow was loud and echoed in the quiet streets. "Be careful."

"You too Law." You watched him go. Your gloved hand tightened on the strap of your duffel bag. Did you do the right thing? Asking Law, your crush to be your primary care doctor? You only wanted to ask him a could of question, but the intrusive thoughts won. You could always change to a woman doctor, if you wanted to. Guess Jess is going to tease me for blabbing to Law.

Shivering you rubbed your arms and made your way home. You knew Onigiri, the sweet and adorable little guy was waiting for you. Guess that means he's going to be a big brother isn't he?

I can already see him being overprotective of the baby and sleeping beside the crib, or somehow crawling into it. You giggle to yourself.

Law paused at the top of the hill, turning and watching your retreating figure grow further and further away. He had half a mind to chase after you and walk you home, but he thought better of it. He's sure you'll be fine he tells himself.

He followed your silhouette and watched you walk around the corner, making a mental note to look up possible houses close by in that direct in case of emergencies, and not for creepy reasons.

Readjusting his bag he whispered quietly to himself out loud, "Good night Y/n."

------ End of Chapter 1 ------

Okay, I know it didn't end exactly like the poll and preview, but I kept writing and writing until I decided to break it down. XD

I hope I didn't disappoint my fellow Law fans!

Were you surprised who the baby daddy was? Yes? No?

Give me your thoughts please! I tried to keep our snow leopard close to canon.

Tag list: @m0sigma7 @angelblueflame @pandora-writes-one-piece @short-honey-badger @supreme-burrito @fanaticsnail @turtletaubwrites @cherry-queens-blog @fairymama624

[edsheeranong]

sweet pea x fem oc

A/N- i've never written before and idk if anyone will even see this but pls be nice. i've also not really watched riverdale in many years so i'm trying to piece things together but it won't follow the plot very well.

-archie andrews twin sister, delilah, is fed up with him being overprotective. so when a cute serpent offers her an opportunity, she can't turn it down

"andrews," an unfamiliar voice called out. delilah hummed in response, not bothering to look who it was and instead continued piling notebooks out of her locker. "i hear your brother doesn't like you dating, he goes around and tells everyone not to go near you, 'or else'" the boy said.

"can i help you with something or...?" delilah said, closing her locker and looking at the boy.

"sweet pea," he extended his hand out to her. she readjusted the stack of book in her hands to shake his. "i've got a proposition for you," he stated.

"look, you wouldn't be the first boy to think he can get with me without my brother finding out," she started walking and followed her. "it never ends well."

"i think i can handle him," he stated. she turned to look at him and realized he had a point. he was incredibly tall and muscular. "but anyway that's not what i'm suggesting," he pulled her into an alcove. "i hate your brother, he thinks he's the shit and he keeps messing with southsiders."

"why are you telling me this?" she cut him off.

"i think we can help each other out," he said, resulting in a raised eyebrow from the girl. "you hate him for controlling you, i just hate him."

"okay, i don't hate my brother," she said.

"but you're fed up with him telling everyone not to go out with you?" he asked, and she sighed and murmured in agreement. "i'm suggesting a little revenge."

"why me?" she asked, he was getting annoyed at how she kept interrupting him.

"i'm probably the person your brother hates most, at least at this school. and i hate your brother so much, being with his sister would just kill him," he explained.

"'with' as in..." she said.

"dating," he clarified.

"let me get this straight, you want me to fake date you so you can get back at my brother for being a dick and i can get back at him for controlling my love life?"

"yep, pretty much," he shrugged.

"i'm still confused," she admitted. "if we're not actually together, you're not really getting back at him."

"if he believes we're together, then it's like i took something from him. he tries so hard to keep you away from guys, and his number one enemy being the one you defy him for. it'll make him go crazy."

"it'll make things worse, he's only gonna harass you more," delilah pointed out.

"once again, i can deal with him," he said. "just think about it," he walked away, leaving her to think.

she walked home alone and really thought about his proposal. she was fully on board with showing archie he couldn't control her, but she was scared of what he would do to sweet pea. it was all she thought about that entire night and she decided she just needed to sleep on it.

the entire next day she kept trying to find a time to talk to him but he was always with someone.

she was about to take it as a sign but as she was leaving school, she turned the corner and ran right into him. he grabbed her arm to stabilize her and raised his eyebrows at her.

"so?" he asked.

"i'm down," she told him. he smirked at her and they started walking. he led her to the back of the school where his bike was. he handed her his helmet and she hesitated before taking it.

"well it would be bad manners not to drive my girl home," he said, noticing her confused expression.

"okay hold up," she said as he mounted the bike. "i think we need to have a conversation about this."

"what is there to talk about?"

"uh, i don't know. how long are we gonna do this for?" she sat down on the ledge in front of him.

"until we decide we've had enough," he said.

"okay... how is this... gonna work?" she asked and he pondered for a moment.

"well, we should make sure archie sees us together, obviously. but we gotta keep this act up around other people too," he pulled his leg off his bike and stepped closer to her, putting his hands on her knees and spreading them so he could stand between them.

Sweet pea took the moment of silence to take a good look at her. he had seen her around school, of course, but it was always from a distance. her hair was usually messy, due to the loose curls in it.

but looking at her up close was different. her eyes were bright green and her skin was almost sickly pale. she had freckles littered about her face. she was a lot to take in. sweet pea knew he wouldn't have asked her if she wasn't at least a little bit attracted to her.

it shocked him how different she looked from her twin brother. he had bright red hair and dark eyes but her hair was pitch black and piercing green eyes.

"okay," she managed to finally get out. "i have some rules though."

"rules?" he threw his head back. "i don't really do rules."

"we get it, you're a bad boy," she rolled her eyes at him. "and yes i have rules. number one, we keep my dad out of this. he's been through a lot recently and i don't want to stress him out more," she waited for a sign be understood and when he nodded his head she continued. "number two, nothing too physical. i've never had a boyfriend before and i don't want all my firsts to be wasted on a boy-"

"like me?" he cut her off. "a serpent? a southsider?"

"who isn't actually my boyfriend," she finished, clearly annoyed.

"fine, but nobodies going to believe we're dating if i can't kiss you," he pointed out.

"you can kiss me, but i'm not doing anything more," she told him. "number three, you can't tell anyone this isn't real. if it got back to archie, neither of us would live to see another day."

"my lips are sealed," he said. "now if that's all..." he picked her up by her waist and gently placed her on the ground. "i think it's time we set the plan in motion," he gestured toward his bike.

"sure, but archie won't be home," she said as he placed the helmet on her head and messed with the straps.

"where will he be?" he got back on his bike and patted the space behind him.

"him and veronica go to pops every friday after school," she explained, carefully climbing on the bike. he grabbed her arms and placed them around his torso.

"then i guess i know where we're going," he started his bike. "hold on tight."

[clarity2electricboogaloo]

Outsiders shit. Some modern some not idfk

These are all like. The most crack-filled hcs ever, please excuse my brain 🙏🏽🙏🏽 if these don’t make sense to you, tell me

- dally is so headstrong that the moment someone bets he can’t do something, he does it

- the gang takes advantage of this

- (this is a method I use on my younger siblings 😭😭)

- dally can walk in heels

- also two bit. Like scarily well. His sister is amazed.

- pony calls people whore

- Johnny calls people thot

- they say these to each other on a regular basis.

- also hoe

- uhhh where was I

- something something gay something something 70s 80s smth pony and Johnny because Johnny never died frfr no cap

- Johnny: “I can’t believe yall vape smh”

- also Johnny: *pulls out a cigarette for each hand*

- pony does the same thing

- twobit and Marcia are either gay-lesbian solidarity or they’re dating, no in between

- if they’re gay, they’re a beard couple just like “we pretend to date, they can’t catch on” “I like the way you think, woman”

- ily twobit matthews. That’s all.

- twobit and Marcia are actually both Hispanic, its canon trust I was there

- dally types “women ☕️” in instagram comment sections

- also “it’s bc I’m a man isn’t it”

- (ty V on discord for that second one 🙏🏽🙏🏽)

- cherry and dally argue on twitter

- a lot

- dally spams cherry and then she absolutely COOKS this pathetic rat man

- dally blocks cherry, doesn’t talk to her for a while, then eventually forgets and unblocks her to harass the poor girl again

- cherry doesn’t realize blocking is a thing, but she complains to marcia and marcia shows her how to block Dallas

- dally, two bit, and Steve are all hopelessly addicted to twitter

- like it’s really fucking bad

- someone get these mfs off the internet

- dally therapy

- now

- right fucking now

- cherry valance and ponyboy bisexual man/bisexual woman solidarity

- they are besties

- nothing more nothing less

- change my mind

- (you cant)

- marcia “good luck babe” by Chappell roan

- pony autism

- Johnny audhd

- Darry autism

- soda audhd or just adhd

- I saw someone say dally ocd once and I like it so

- dally ocd

- twobit adhd

- Steve adhd

- everyone trauma :D

- when johnny actually lived after the fire bc thats what actually happened actually fr, he left his parents because he realized they didn’t love him (pulling from the “I don’t wanna see her” scene for this)

- he stays with the curtis boys most of if not all the time

- if soda and Darry are gone, pony will grab Johnny and they’ll sleep together

- not in a weird way you freaks

- pony just genuinely cannot sleep

- I may or may not be influenced by fics I’ve read…

- soda saw them one night when he got home late and was like “…queers?”

- he stays out a bit later than usual now, often found sleeping in another room

- Darry actually supports more than pony thought, when he comes out, Darry is like a pride parade mom frfr

- kinda lowkey overbearing with it

- ily Darrel curtis

- soda is the typa guy to genuinely not understand lgbtq+ but supports anyways

- sodas the typa guy to be asked what his pronouns are and say “just he/him. Wish I had smth more interesting, but I’m just a guy :D”

- on the other end of that, soda and Steve are gay

- everyone is gay

- all of them

- so very fucking gay

Im done yapping for now, im so sorry for anyone that sees this

[violentdelightsandviolentends]

women into f1 - how are we feeling at the moment?

(edit - at the end of the day they’re all millionaires who don’t actually give a shit about anything other than their money and their name. just opening out a discussion, is all. I know there are no angels in this situation.)

I think media day today has really changed the way we’re looking at certain people and certain things.

Daniel calling possible SA/harassment allegations “noise and distraction” and saying “he hope it all goes away soon”. Valterri and Lance saying “I’m just here to drive cars.” Nico saying “it really doesn’t affect me.”

These are people with wives, daughters, sisters and partners that are in the paddock all the time. All you’ve got to say is something along the lines of I hope the investigation is impartial and thorough, the paddock should be a safe place for all, we should be promoting diversity etc etc… I mean. They’ve been PR trained and they’re still saying the wrong thing.

Lewis is the only one giving any sensible answers, which makes sense. He’s the only one that’s ever really put his money where his mouth is in terms of talking about diversity, equality, etc, and taking actions to match it.

There are millions of women/young women into the sport. Some like myself who’ve been watching since they were kids, some who are new to it. And once again, a male dominated sport has proven itself to be solely male centric, a sport built by men protecting men. These are drivers who want to talk about equality when it’s trendy, but only really care about themselves and their paycheck.

I could probably talk about this for hours, but I just wanted to open it out to any of my f1 girls here, because I’d love for it to be a discussion, rather than me just ranting. <3

[ghulehcirice]

Lavender Fog Part 2

[Phantom Ghoul X Reader]

[A/N]; Hey Babes! Thank you for all the love on part one I really wasn’t expecting it all I want this to be as amazing as good as I can make it but let’s go over a few reminders!

TW/CW list; the ghouls are described more in-depth as pack like creatures and are displayed as doing things such as nesting and scenting, as well as purring, there will be talk of harassment and bullying not done by any of our main characters, foul language such as whore, slut and other unsavoury words will be used for reader! Please remember you are none of those things! This fic will incorporate the Possessive!Phantom elements I was aiming for last chapter! Some siblings of sin shit talking the ghouls and calling them inhuman, demons etc.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT THE PEOPLE BEHIND THE MASKS AND I DO NOT WANT THEN TO BE DRAGGED INTO THIS.

I am all for respecting people and ideas. My philosophy with this is that the band was originally established to be completely anonymous I will keep that with everyone. Which does include the ghouls and papas.

On a more silly note I want to include Copia more and I am an autistic and trans Copia truther and he will probably resemble my own expirences!

With that being said I will add any tws that are needed so let’s get started.

Apparently this connection you both shared was a rarity between humans and ghouls, you knew ghouls often get attached to people, thinking back to all the videos you have seen of Omega and Papa Terzo. But it’s not often that that bond happens between a newly summoned ghoul and a regular sibling of sin.

The past few days had been a whirlwind of organizing with you, Copia and Sister Imperator. Quickly you’ve come to learn you can’t spend a whole lot of time away from phantom, Lest you want a ghoul fussing over wheter you’ve eaten, if you’ve been hurt, etc. you had to move into the ghouls den with him, not that you really cared, they have their own kitchens and everything. That’s not even starting on just how comfortable ghoul nests are. That reminds you to swap some of the clothes you had given him to build his nest with so you had clean clothes.

Your past few days had consisted of alot of this, swapping clothes from the nest, getting moved into the den, figuring out what you’re going to do in the clergy now because you can’t do a whole lot with your puppy of a boyfriend (is that what you two are? Cirrus called it being mates but also said it’s not a title to be taken lightly.) It has also been a lot of getting to know Papa on a more personal level as he helped you learn about ghouls. Quickly you’ve come to learn Papas not very different from anyone else in this Abbey. He had a very big love of his rats VERY BIG. This man really loves rats, outside of his papal makeup he struggles with things anyone else does, eye contact, talking, confidence. Can I just emphasize how much this man loves rats and rodent like animals? Same with those old really shity 8 but games. If you asked me last week how big a rodents test were I WOULD NOT have guessed that they do not stop growing. The fact Copia had stuttered out when you first met was going straight into your little box of horrors. Right next to the fucking talking plant from that show.

On days you spend in the papal library, you would often be coddled near to loving suffocation from Phantom. Smell is a large thing for ghouls, so you usually have to spend anywhere between an hour and a half all the way through 4 hours cuddling with a ghoul so you’re properly scented. And no, you can’t move unless it’s absolutely necessary even then you get trailed to and from whatever the important thing was. Once you both are settled further, you need to have a talk about space and boundaries. You know he’s been trying his best to learn between everything. On the nights you spend in eachothers arms he tells you about some ghoul customs, although you can’t hear a whole lot over the… purring? Apparently ghouls do in fact purr when they’re happy and you were not hearing things. Had to have Copia help you realize that one. But he told you about something, the name was in infernal tounge, which is apparently the native tounge in the pit. But it seemed similar to promise rings.

From your understanding, ghouls who were mating would forge a ring of this extremely tough material that’s found in the pit, it’s hard to find and even harder to meld into shape. He told you that if you could find that material and mold it perfectly to fit the chosen partner and return it then you were fated to be together. In turn you told phantom about your newly acquired fact and in turn would tell him about human courting and dating culture, like how in most cultures people also exchange rings, and get their love officiated in often times extravagant ceremonies. And you promised him one day you’d take him on a human date, once he properly learned how to glamour.

It was hard at first, learning how to balance phantom with your learning and the tasks you had quickly picked up around the den. It would turn out most siblings of sin arent brave enough to come down here to do their chores. So you were the go to for any task that had to be done by a human granted you could be pulled from phantoms death grasp long enough to accomplish anything of course leading to more phantom cuddles and scenting. The more you let it happen the nicer it became you had to admit it was pretty nice to have someone caring about you so much that they wanted to coddle you.

But on your next escapade from the ghouls den you quickly learned that ghouls can also have a protective streak. This was abit of a later trip then you would usually be on, if you had to take a guess Terzo might’ve gotten his dick stuck in the eyehole of a ghouls mask… again. Wasn’t your job to question though. On your route to Copias quarters you were cornered by some siblings of sin. They caught you in the old corridors, which was very strange because no one was supposed to have access to this place.

“Can I help you folks?” You muttered out with the confusion clearly lacing your words. The siblings snickered at you cruelly jeering like hyenas when you tried to duck around them only to be stepped infront of by one of them.

“Arent you the ghoul fucker?” The tallest of the flock sneers, confused you step back only to hit the wall “I’m sorry the what?” The siblings just laugh at your confusion, looking to and from one another and oogling you like a circus freak.

“You’re fucking that new ghoul aren’t you? The one that’s replacing the Aether ghoul?” They repeat, watching you with the eyes of a hawk. The two on either side of her chuckle and close in on you, forcing you to curl closer into yourself. Out of the corner of your eye you could’ve sworn you could see a flash of weirdly coloured fog, though it’s probably nothing.

“Im not ‘fucking’ anyone. Why would you ask such a thing?”

“Everyone always knew you were a whore, are you trying to get into papas pants through his ghouls? Or are you just a slut like that? You know none of the ghouls would even care about you right? They’re monsters! They can’t feel any real human emotions, you’re delusional if you think any of them care about you. It will dump you out once it finds something better to have at.”

You flinched away at the siblings cruel words. They didn’t know anything about your bond with phantom and the others. You knew they were nothing like these siblings of sin said. Taking a deep breath, you recentred yourself and just stare at the group. Using all the i don’t give a shit energy you’ve picked up from Mountain to deter them.

They didn’t seem to like this very much because they started stepping closer and closer, if you’re being honest you felt like the nerd kid in any 90s high school setting getting their lunch money taken by the bully jocks. Before they could pick you up by your feet and shake all the coins from your pocket like a rag doll and give you a swirlie in the school toilet, the smallest of the group was shot to the floor in a heap of black, white, and.. lavender? Oh shit.

Phantom must have come to find you, or one of the ghouls seen the sibling bothering you and went to tell your mate. Before you could wrack your brain you were torn away by the scream of the other two siblings who were backing away from the scene. Within an instant papa was out of his quarters, clearly having just woken up given the disheveled look he was in, only having on his Mickey Mouse pyjama pants and being bare chested on top. Wait, does papa have top surgery scars? Oh cool. You could tell papa was a little fruity, now you knew why. Quickly you and Copia worked together to get phantom away from the sibling who didn’t seem to be hurt, looked to be a few cuts from phantoms claws.. he has claws?? The sibling probably had a few bumps and bruises from the fall too.

Papa took the three siblings after you abashedly gave him the file you were supposed to, leaving you to calm down Phantom, Now that everything was calmed down, you quickly realized Phantom didn’t have his mask on which was a surprise because on one hand, the ghouls aren’t supposed to have their masks off anywhere average siblings could see them and two, Phantom hasn’t taken off his mask around you yet, when you two first met he had an old Era 3 mask on. He told you he wasn’t the most comfortable with his face, telling you that he had gotten pretty beaten up during his summoning, and that he had birthmarks he didn’t like. You couldn’t see why, he has Lichtenberg scar righ down his left eye and moving down and across the bridge of his nose the eye it when through was a lighter shade of purple then his right, you found him beautiful but he really didn’t like it, you’re probably gonna have to give him a lot of cuddles tonight.

Once everyone was away from the scene, Phantom stared into your face, breathing heavy. It felt as though everything fell silent and still. Until Phantom ran at you, and picked you up into a bridal carry, without speaking her took you back to the den. When you arrived in the lounge the other ghouls all watched you, with Cirrus and Aurora coming up to check on you. Phantom held you away possessively from the woman, He ignored everyone and took you to your shared room.

You were definitely right about having to give him extra cuddles that night. When he laid you down and got into bed, before dragging you onto his chest and taking your face in his hands.

“Are you okay?” He asks, gently handling your face as he looked it over for scars, in turn you grab his face and kiss his own scars, using your spare hand to guide his hand to feel your heart beat.

“I should be asking you that, bug. You didn’t have to fight them for me. They’re just jealous.” He growls at the mention of the incident, gently nibbling at your hand that held his face. He doesn’t reply but gently shifts you from his chest and goes to his chest of draws, he rustles around and grabs an short for you and puts it on the bed for you before grabbing his own clothes

“I’d be a bad mate if I didn’t.” He leaves to get changed and you get into the shirt, and gently re arrange the nest to be comfortable for a good nap. You can hear Cirrus checking up on phantom and the muttering of Their conversation. Once phantom is back, you curl into his side as phantom purrs and hums the tune of Little Sunshine.

Deep down you think you’ll be just fine with your mate.

—————————————————————————

[A/N; WE DID IT! I hit major writers block with this, I wanna thank you all for the love on Part one, and especially @pinklunarprincess for supporting my posts thus far, you were the first person (from my memory) to encourage me with part one and I thank you! I hope you guys enjoy, I’m too exhausted to beta read right now so if I missed anything PLEASE let me know, I’m working on another little fic idea I’ve had so hopefully something will be out soon<3 love you all and thank you

[velvetvexations]

--- somehow i don't think the trans radfem movement thinks aphobia is a fine word to exist

It's almost quaint. Almost.

Why is there a wave of trans radfems defending 4chan boards

I'm going to need to be pointed to this if only because I'm going to get dinged for spreading malicious lies about trans women being "Nazis" otherwise, but lmfao if true.

wtf kind of hill is txttletale dying on now?

I mean she's still a tankie fuck but apparently now she's also getting in on the transmisogynistic harassment campaign game.

isn't "doll" specifically a fetish term? that is really not something people should be applying to other people without making sure it's ok first.

No, it's a Black ballroom term that trans women started running with.

People on this site are taking pissing on the poor to a whole new goddamn level “telling people that this person is/has sexually harassed someone who was a minor is calling everyone with their identity a pedophile”, I’d blame the school system but that really was a choice not to actually read and relay

it's definitely malicious

joan jett in the mv for i hate myself for loving you is like, unbearably beautiful

so true

it’s so obvious that these people choose to isolate themselves in a dimension crafted out of their own self-hatred that they care more about hurting their oppressors (and people who don’t even oppress them) than uplifting people hurt by systems of oppression. sometimes i think i’m bad but then i come across people like that and realise i’m relatively well-adjusted

inspiring innit

post addressed to trans women from a trans woman about trans women –> trfs in the notes: “why are you telling me to be nice to trans men?”

they have their priorities

absolutely wild to say that transunitists are 2010-reddit-style mras and then say things like "afab privilege." yeah those afabs with their wielding of power. and i bet they get free drinks at every bar and their bosses promote them for being pretty, huh.

they get upset at having their logic compared to MRAs because it's implicit misgendering (never mind that they directly call random trans men MRAs and radfems as well) but I'm not sure what they expect when they talk at length about how all of those fucking evil AFAB bitches are just waiting for their chance to screw you over with a false rape accusation

"pick me" is AAVE, and, like all white girls, they're overusing and misusing it until it has no meaning left 🙄

I actually wasn't aware of that. Neat. Disputed? See replies.

a lot of this going on is just reminding me once again of the intense monogenderism that really never gets worked on. It’s super awkward as a multigendered individual and an intersex one

it also just really feels so fucking tone ignorant the way people talk.

society still calls traits of men or masc, some even actively choose to agree while still being a counter to it gender but obviously real trans women don’t so attacking those things would never hurt them, and multigender trans woman who are also men? Obviously fake.

the English language is so fucking insufficient

I honestly wish every asshole who seems to think the ability to mask as complete cis and definitely just your assigned gender is a privilege had to live in my head for the holiday season. I am entirely in the closet with my family because of bigotry I have no other choice than living with my family for multiple reasons I just spent the entire winter holiday pretending to be a woman answering to my deadname being called aunty and sister and daughter and not being able to say jack shit about it without even being able to retreat to the solace of my friends afterwards because they are all busy with their own families. I want those assholes to experience the emotions and thoughts I just went through and come out the otherside and see if they still think that this is a fucking privilege.

Love you anon. <3

that anon telling on themselves so hard saying transmisogynys "far deeper" than transphobia. literally why on earth would you phrase it like that if the point was anything besides "my *special* oppression is way more poignant and meaningful than your boring regular oppression"

lmao right though it's so obviously just trying to mark their thing as having more dramatic flair

do you keep a backup of your blog with a program like tumblthree? there's a lot of valuable posts on it, and tumblr is almost distressingly transitory.

I don't, but noted.

[kieren-fucking-walker]

Hey folks!

A few people asked if I was okay after my other post so I thought I'd give a general update as to Life Things (tm).

My mum finally left my dad, nys sister got married and he wasn't invited to the wedding and the way he acted was enough to make her leave. My youngest sister (still an adult) was left alone with my dad in the house and I had to talk her through packing a bag and leaving without him noticing. They both left pretty much everything behind and we don't know if they'll be able to get it back. They're at my grandparents now which is further away from both of their workplaces and a very temporary solution, but safe at least. My youngest sister is disabled and she needs support nobody can really give her at the moment, but she's safe.

I lost Juniper (one of my cats) a few weeks back. It was old age, but I wasn't able to be with her and it still doesn't quite feel real. I miss her so much, and I feel very bad about not being able to be with her (a very good friend was though, she was loved and wasn't alone thank god.) Sage is looking for her sometimes but seems to have some understanding of what's happened since he saw her briefly afterwards, she's buried in my best friends garden having a new adventure.

My landlord put my rent up by £100, but hasn't fixed a lot of the things wrong with the flat. The cost of heating this place is ridiculously high, so I'm trying to put the heating on as little as possible even though it's dropping into the minus degrees. Apparently they're set to go up even more in the new year because this country wants to kill us I guess.

My disabilities are all flaring up at once, I've had to take unpaid leave from work, I've not been able to afford the physio sessions that stave off the joint issues, or the food that helps keep my protein levels up because it is expensive and I need to eat something at least. I'm very very lucky that we have the NHS and all of my medications now qualify so at least I get those.

It's coming up to Christmas, I don't know what it's going to be like this year. My family is scattered and all in precarious situations, none of us have much to spare and most of us don't have a permanent home or more than a suitcase of stuff. I need to get Sage his vaccinations, and I feel terrible about leaving him alone in the cattery over Christmas.

That is to say that life is a lot. It's good things, but unstable. My dad is harassing us all, but we aren't stuck with him. I can't afford to keep my disabilities at bay, but my family is safer even if they need more support. Mentally at least I'm okay, I think.

If you'd like to help out, my PayPal is here and my Ko-Fi is here. If you can't or just don't want to this is not for you, god knows we're all going through hard times at the moment and the world is going to shit, but if you do and you're able it will be much appreciated by me and my family.

Finally here is a picture of my beautiful Juniper. Rest in peace my darling.

I hope you all have a wonderful holiday season, and thank you for reading 💜

[inevitablysomber-dark]

Ladybug (Chapter 8 Final Chapter)

Intensely Dark! Rafe Cameron x Acutely Aware! Reader

WARNING: Non-Consent, Manipulation, Kidnapping, Stalking, forced interactions, Causing trauma, unhinged obsession. MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY. MINORS DNI

Summary: After a fresh breakup with her ex, Kyle, a chance encounter leads to an entanglement between Ladybug and her friend, Sarahs, volatile brother, Rafe, who had long standing conflicts with her friends. However, what began as an accidental hookup, quickly spirals into a troubling situation as Rafe's infatuation takes a darker turn. His fixation becomes a source of distress, as his persistent harassment disrupts Ladybugs Peace.

Series Masterlist

Rafes POV

My patience has officially run out, and I’m furious.

I thought I could use Sarah to get my hands on Ladybug but she eventually proved to be worthless. 

I never expected some random old man to play hero once I pounced, but here I was in my room fuming, and without Ladybug to warm my bed.

But I’ll get my hands on her, and she’ll realize that I’m the best she's ever gonna have, I just needed to wait a little longer. 

There's a pounding on my door, breaking me from my thoughts, and before I can think to answer, Sarah comes barging in frantically, looking at something on her phone. 

“John B. is at the beach, I think he’ll be there for a little while, if we hurry we can catch him.”

She’s a mess, she’s been a mess since Johnny Boy got the balls to dump her ass. 

Don’t get me wrong, I love Sarah, she’s my little sister. But I know better than anyone how much of a self-conceited bitch she could really be. 

She’s good at hiding it, I’ll give her that. But now it’s catching up to her, and if I’m being honest I’m proud to be part of her  downfall. Maybe she could benefit from being knocked down a peg or two. 

“What are you talking about?” I asked, agitation lacing my tone. 

She stops to look at me, body still as if shocked to hear me speak before responding. 

“You said you would talk to John B-” 

I held my hand up to keep her from continuing.

“Under the condition that I get Ladybug.” I gesture to the space in my room “Where is she Sarah?”

“You can still have her, but you have to speak to John B. for me please Rafe.” She has her hands clasped together,begging for me to see her way, but I don’t fall for it. 

If I’m being completely honest, all I really care about is getting Ladybug, all this extra shit Sarah had me doing was starting to get on my nerves. 

I sigh standing up to my full height to look down at her. 

“Be honest Sarah, how long had you been fucking Topper, really?”

She’s taken aback by my question. 

“What are you -?” she starts but I interrupt.

“Spare me your bullshit, from one scum to another, how long?” I cut to the chase.

Sarah and Topper had been fraternizing long before I caught them. Topper, though my friend, was truly a pathetic man. 

He started dating Butterfly, when he found out Sarah had been cheating on him with John B. Sarah likes to say that they weren’t together, but that's cause she’s full of shit, considering that they never had a conversation to cement them going their separate ways. 

When he started dating Butterfly there was a shift in Sarah’s attitude, and it was only a matter of time before Topper started spilling the beans about their ‘Secret Relationship’. 

Catching them together in Sarah’s room the night of our house party only confirmed what I already knew. And to be honest the only reason I said anything about it, was because she and John B. were getting in between me and Ladybug. 

Sarah stutters and I just laugh.

“I don’t get it, why don’t you just go back to Topper.” I question crossing my arms over my chest. 

“I don’t want him! And he’s not even answering his phone, I think he blocked me.” her attention pulls back to her phone.

He did block her. 

When I revealed Sarah and Topper's relationship to John, not even a day later, Topper called me in a panic, frantically asking how Butterfly found out and broke up with him over Sarah.

My guess, John B.

One might assume Topper would eagerly reunite with Sarah given the opportunity, but apparently not. Instead, he was focused on damage control with Butterfly, and part of that involved blocking Sarah.

I sigh, grabbing her by the shoulders and gently pushing her out of my room.

“Look Sarah, I think you need time to find yourself and figure out what you want in life.” Once she was out of the door I tried to close it but she pushed her hand against it. 

“I want John B, and I need your help to get him back, you need to take back what you said Rafe!”

“You need to grow the fuck up!” I say slamming the door and locking it in her face. 

Sarah was useless, I needed to find another way to get to Ladybug. 

I laid on my bed as Sarah pounded on my door yelling obscenities at me but she was a lost thought now.

All my focus was now on my Ladybug.

***

The first time I saw Ladybug, there was a huge bonfire at the beach, Pogues, Kooks, Tourons, the works. And there she was, I’d seen her around, but this was the first I actually paid attention to her, and boy did she have my attention. Too bad she had some loser tied to her the whole night, so I let it go, or at least I tried to. 

I may have confronted her and her little boyfriend and caused a scene in front of everyone. I didn’t understand why I did it, at least not until afterwards.

A few weeks later she's in my living room with Sarah and a bunch of other pogues, and the whole thing just rubs me the wrong way. Since then just seeing her face would get a rise out of me. 

Imagine my surprise when she's waltzing in my living room while I’m hanging out with Topper and Kelce. Tail tucked between her legs and the saddest expression I’ve ever seen on her face.

Seeing her in my house with no access to her pissed me off, I asked her why the fuck she was in my house as soon as she said Sarah said she could, I started tearing into her. 

Next thing I know, she’s on her knees balling her eyes out, and if I’m being honest, I started getting hard. 

She looked so small, so vulnerable, so beautiful.

I found myself reaching for her, and before I could take another step, she backed away begging me not to hurt her. Topper asked her if she was ok, and she sniffled a ‘I’m fine’.

I take another step, just wanting to touch her once and she screams out. I tried to calm her down, but she just said something about waiting for Sarah and going outside. 

It was then that I realized my chance. For the next few hours I sat and thought about how I could get in with the pretty girl sitting by my pool.

I remembered a special package of pills that I had stashed away in my room and I couldn’t help but think that this was the perfect time to use them. As soon as Butterfly came over and Topper and Kelce left, I went searching.

When I found them I grabbed 2 heading downstairs to the kitchen to grab 2 bottles of beer. I crushed both and sifted them into one of the bottles, swirling the bottle so the pills could dissolve in the liquid. 

I make my way to the pool, and just as I step outside, Ladybug stands. I convince her to sit back down and hand her one of the bottles. I asked about her little break down, and when she took a swig of the beer my heart skipped a beat. I had her and frankly I didn’t give a fuck about the rest of the conversation, but I needed a bit more time to let the substance settle into her system.

It was only a matter of time before she was in my grasp like putty.

I had her in my bed in no time. 

It was exquisite, despite the lazy movements she was very responsive to my ministrations, by the end of it all we were both naked and covered in a sheen of sweat. I had her again the next day, and something told me to grab her phone and download a tracker on it. The third day early morning, I headed downstairs to grab a couple glasses of water, when I came back, she was gone. 

I was pissed. How dare she fucking leave me?

I rushed to get some clothes hoping to catch her before she disappeared. I spent half the day looking up and down Figure 8 trying to find her, but I never did. 

When I got back home, I slammed my door and screamed out in frustration ready to destroy everything in sight until something on the nightstand catches my eye. 

Her phone, I grab it squeezing it tight. 

I would have her again, I just needed to be patient.

When I managed to give her back her phone, I knew where she was at all times, and it gave me some reassurance about having her again. 

When I finally got to taste her again, it was during an impromptu Cameron house party. This time she was wide awake and the sounds she was making, the way she reacted, how she tightened around me. 

What really got me going was her gorgeous face, from the tears running down her to the pleasure in her eyes. 

I was harder than a brick and I fucked her all throughout the night.

***

I had her again, following her up and down Outer Banks ready to spring at any moment, since the incident with Sarah and the crook, who snatched her up from me.I asked Dad to take care of him. But since then I’ve had to keep a low profile. 

Dad said if I wanted her I needed to chain her up, and never let her go.I had to admit having that conversation with him was difficult because I knew exactly what he meant. 

He allotted mom certain freedoms, and where was she now?

No, I wanted Ladybug and I want to keep her for as long as I could. As soon as I had her in my grasp I was not letting her go, under any circumstances. I would not make the same mistakes Dad did. 

It was easy to get a hold of her again, I admit it was pure luck.

It seemed like the other pogues had their own things going on so she was alone most of the time, and I got the feeling that she was running away from something. She was at the beach, and she stayed there all day. 

I watched as she moved around, swishing thoughts in her own head, completely unaware of my presence. 

When I looked around I realized this was the perfect moment to take her. No one was around, not even the food cart vendors. 

I slowly snuck up behind her , and I was even surprised at how close I got before she even realized that I was there.

I held her tight, holding my hand tightly over her mouth and she immediately started fighting back. 

“Hey, Relax, re-” when she smashed her head against my face, I accidentally let her go. 

Anger overtook my senses, as I chased after her, pain and rage pumping through my veins. When I catch up, I tackle her to the ground, immediately wrapping my hands around her neck from behind. 

I started squeezing. 

“I’m tired of you playing hard to get, if you don’t behave then I’ll make you behave.”

I don’t hear any confirmation as we both struggle so I continue to choke her 

“Answer me, will you behave!?”

Before I know it, her body is limp, and I immediately let go at that realization. She fell head first into the sand. And for a moment there is a pause as I’m putting together the pieces of what just happened. 

I quickly rolled her over, and put my ear to her mouth. When I hear staggered breaths, relief washes over me. I look around the beach, and it’s still empty. So I gather her in my arms and take her to my truck. I finally had her, and nothing would keep us apart this time.

***

It takes her a bit longer than I’d like, to open her eyes, when she eventually does she finds herself naked, and tied up spread eagle to my bed with her mouth gagged. 

When I see that she’s woken up I stand at the foot of the bed waiting for her to take notice of me. In the meantime I admire my handy work.

As I gaze at her naked form I can’t help but appreciate how truly stunning she was. How could she possibly be a  Pogue?

Well, she didn’t have to worry about that anymore.

It takes a bit of time, but after blinking a few times, I see that I have her full attention.

“Hey Sleepyhead,” I say as softly as I could, I have to admit, I’ve never been happier. I finally had her to myself. “ You had a long nap, how are you feeling?”

She starts freaking out pulling on her restraints and trying to scream through the gag. I quickly rush to comfort her, the bruise on her neck catching my attention, but I ignore the thoughts that came with it.

She would be fine, I’ll take care of her, and with time she’ll realize just how compatible we are. 

The tears don’t stop flowing but it seems that she’s calmed down. 

“Listen, we belong together, and you may not be able to see it now but you’ll see it eventually.” She started getting worked up again as her sobbing intensified. 

It was fine, no one would be able to hear her, and she’d learn her place eventually. 

I looked up and down her form as she was lost in her own thoughts. 

I could still have my own fun, I straddle her body, and she goes back to her uncontrollable sobbing. 

I don’t freight as I feel up the sides of her body trailing my hands to her breasts and twirling her nipples between my fingers.

I feel a flutter in my cock as it hardens with arousal as her body begins to shake more violently than before. But I use a hand to hold her still by her neck, again choosing to ignore the bruises from our previous altercation, and she finally stills. I palm her breast with my other hand more intensely, before shoving her nipple into my mouth, swirling it around with my tongue before letting go with a pop, and giving some attention to the other. 

I kiss her gag, before nibbling, and sucking all of her skin down her body until I reach the goldmine that is her pussy, releasing her neck during my journey. I start my venture by pressing my tongue flatly against her outer lips, lapping up and down her precious area, slowly sneaking my tongue in deeper and deeper until I push my tongue inside her, savoring her flavor. 

I move my tongue up to her clit giving it special attention, and this is when she begins to squirm, feeling the pleasures that I’ve forced on her body, and my cock twitches at the thought of getting a reaction out of her. 

I alternate between swirling my tongue against her clit to gently sucking and before I know it she's quaking against my mouth and her juices begin to flow. 

I waste no time lapping it up and at this point my erection is painfully digging into my bed. I sit up and rush out my clothes. Slowly climbing up her body, resting my body between her legs before laying my eyes on her once more. 

This time she looked at peace, as if accepting her fate, I smiled and decided to give her a bit of leeway.  Reaching back to release the constraints on her feet. 

She  bends her knees as her thighs involuntarily tightens around my torso.

I hold one hand against her waist to still her body, while using the other, the help in pushing my length into her cunt. 

Up on initial penetration I let go and laid completely into her. Pausing to revel in the warmth of her core.

I was in bliss. 

I adjust the position of my legs, forcing her own upwards, with no choice but to wrap around my body. 

In good faith I removed the gag, and covered her lips with my own. 

Slowly moving my hips back and forth in the process. 

Dragging my manhood in and out of her folds. Slowly increasing my momentum as ecstasy began to overtake us both. 

Her choked mewls and whimpers egged me on as I continued to take her. 

I finally had her, I finally had my Ladybug. 

And I’d make sure to keep her forever.

Tags:

@applelovesposts

[simplepotatofarmer]

tw: death threats, self-harm, rape threats, suicide baiting, racism, slurs, antisemitism, transphobia, and homophobia

i'm making this post because the fact that people don't believe there's harassment happening is wild. it's been happening since the usmp was announced. it got worse when the racism issue on the qsmp happened, which i felt very strongly about speaking out on, and has honestly not stopped. so i want to give a breakdown of what's happened and what i've seen.

i had to leave for a few days to avoid the harassment. people threatened me with acts of violence, threatened my kids and my pets, people were spamming qrts with images of self-harm hidden in fancams. they called me slurs or demanded to see my tribal enrollment. even someone here on tumblr said they believed people were probably faking being indigenous. there was a ton of 'oh so now dream stans care about racism'. because they see us as dream 'stans' first and foremost. this has been a long running issue for poc in the fandom.

people have been doxxed and at least one person got the police involved because someone showed up to their house. this was one of the admins of the usmp update account, an account that was hacked and whose admins have been endlessly harassed and threatened.

i have never seen this level of harassment before and this fandom once drove me to be hospitalized.

it's bad. and it's real. the fact that people are saying things like it's fake or 'dream stans always have to be the victim' is just awful. people on here have made jokes about the very real threats of violence, doxxing, and rape threats that are being directed not just at dream and his family, including his minor sister, but his fans as well. people are being harassed and threatened with the most vile shit. there are legitimate threats. people are scared. it isn't okay.

there's no doubt that people on both sides have been cruel. none of that is okay. i've seen stuff that i absolutely do not approve of. it's never okay to harass people. point blank. there's no 'but' to that.

right now, the fact is that people are being harassed and badly. whatever you may feel about dream and his fans, these things are real and unacceptable.

under the cut is examples of what i'm talking about. not all of them as a lot of people immediately blocked people (that's what i did until i began keeping what i could):

[nerdthatsiriuslylovesteaxx]

Helpless part 54, if you’re going to hurt me, I’ll hurt you

"Father?" He wasn't sure where he was, it was almost like a dream, was he finally dead?

"Hello Nico."

"Am I-" The ghost king had hope, maybe this was it, maybe everything was over.

"No, you're okay." Shit.

"WHY DO THEY NEVER LET ME DIE? I've tried, over and over again, I'm so close, why can't they just let me kill myself? I hate myself, I hate my life, I can't do this anymore." He broke down in tears, Hades wrapped an arm around him.

"It's because they care, Nico every day people who die, even ones in Elysium, they want to live, they all want to go back."

"Go back to what? To all of camp hating me? For me being so fucking scared to tell the truth because I feel like I'll be hated for it? To every single one if my friends debating whether I was worth saving? To being harassed into doing quests? Why should I want to go back?"

"What about a certain son of Apollo? What about Jason Grace? What about your sister?"

"Will's going to get tired of me in a week, Jason's acting because he feels like he owes me for debating whether to leave me in a jar, Hazel's better without me. Anythin else? Just let me fucking die, I know you wanted Bianca to live instead of me."

"I care, Nico I never wanted you to die instead of your sister, you're my son."

"IF YOU CARE THEN LET ME ESCAPE THIS FUCKING HELL."

"BIANCA IS DEAD, I CAN'T SEE HAZEL OR ELSE SHE'LL DIE, I'M NOT LOSING ANOTHER CHILD. I'm not losing you too. You know I'm always here, always here to talk, I'm not the best at this parenting thing, I know, most of us aren't. But I still care, I still love you and I still want to help in any way I can." Nico didn't trust himself to speak, he and his father were alike however not close. Closer than most gods with their children however as Nico had a room in the palace of Hades, no matter how much Persephone didn't like him."I know you won't be happy with this however... I would like you to spend some time in a mortal hospital."

"What the fu-" No, not a fucking chance, he wasn't going there. Not where he wouldn't be left alone, where they'd make him talk, where they would act like they care but don't.

"-no demigod's life is easy, especially yours, I feel like a break would be beneficial for you. It also just gives you time to think and talk to people, please, Nico. If it's that bad I will send someone to check you out but I feel as though it could help you in a way you can't really be helped at camp." Nico held back tears, he knew that was true but what if it just made everything worse? They didn't know him, most people didn't know him, he's fine, he doesn't need help.

"Fine." That was all he could bring himself to say.

"I could wake you up now but I think you're body needs to rest, you'll wake up when you're ready."

"What if I don't?" He hoped that would happen.

"Then I will stay by my promise, you will become a god."

"What the fuck?" Before he could ask any more the dream like experience ended and the world went black around him once more.

***

[povofjustme]

CAOS

I want you

Summary: Whatever Dorcas wants, she gets. And She wanted you.

Warning : 0

Length:1673 words

Pairing: Dorcas Night x OC (fem) reader

PS- didn’t PR so have fun with that 🤣

“Jake I already told you I have plans this weekend” Jake Hells once again was asking me to “hang out” this weekend with him. It’s not that I had anything to do this weekend. It’s just that he was one of the horniest guys I ever met. I mean Nick was one but he never harassed someone like this.

“Oh come on, it will be fun.” Jake could never take no for an answer. Never. “And maybe we could- '' He started to raise his hand to touch my hair but I gently pushed his hair out the way. “Jake, I already said I have plans' ' I need to get away from him, and far. But I just can’t. “Right, and with whom you have plans with,again?”

I don’t know why my mind went blank. He was making me uncomfortable. With that he was just getting closer and closer. I had to make up something, ANYTHING!

“She has plans with me, Jake” I couldn’t see who was coming up behind me but I could always recognize that sweet strong voice anywhere. Dorcas. “Yes, I have plans with Dorcas for the weekend” I look to my right and see the redhead. Her hair was in the braids crowns and her brown dress. She had a smile on her face that I couldn’t make out.

“And what plans do you have with a weird sister? I never seen y’all talk, like ever ""Will- I” for being a witch, I can be a bad lair. I started to mess with the bottom of my shirt. And a habit I had picked up over the years. I couldn't think of anything but Dorcas grabbed my hand into hers. Interlocking her fingers with mine.

“If you must know, she’s my girlfriend.” I looked at her with confusion but then I realized Jake was still in front of us. I just kept a smile on my face.

“So she has plans with her girlfriend for the weekend.” Dorcas kept it together. Holding my hand and giving Jake the death stare. At this moment, Jake looks like he is going to shit himself.

“Now if I see you come near or talk to her, well you know what my sisters and I can do. Come on bae, the girls are waiting for us” with another word, Dorcas pulled me with her. Not a single word comes out of our mouth. She still had her hands together walking down the hallway. I thought she was gonna let go once we were out of Jake's sight, but she never did. I don’t understand why I just went with it.

She walked me to the lunch room where most of the students in the academy were. Still hand in hand, she walked me to where her sisters were sitting. She sat across from them. “You can sit down, my love” Prudence and Agatha looked up at me from their conversation with a smile. Jake was right, I never been around the sisters. Let alone a conversation. I couldn’t run and hide. Everyone was looking. So I did what I was told. Why? I have know fucking idea!

“So sister, I see you found her” Prudence was the one to speak.

I was never scared of the sisters, I just know not to cross them. I’m very powerful myself but I never tried to show it. Coming from being a New Orleans witch and a harvests girl. I just come with a lot of responsibilities when people know who you really are. I just try to stay out of the spotlight with certain things.

They kept on talking, I wasn’t paying attention to anything with we’re saying. Until I could feel Dorcas hand on mine again. “Come with us”

Walking down the hallway, they were in the regular formation. I stayed in the back. Right behind Prudent. They took me into their dorm room. Walking in, the door closed behind me. Now that we are behind closed doors, I feel as if I can breathe and speak again.

“What the Heavens just happened?” All three of the sisters of Night looked at me.

“Helping me out with Jake, which I really appreciate by the way but calling me your girlfriend and then holding me hand in front of everyone” I need to get everything out of my chest. If it was a plan or anything going on, I at least had the right to know. “I just want, no. I need to know what that was about”

Dorcas come up to me and put me on the bed. Now she’s standing in front of me and Prudent and Agatha are standing on to the side. “You are my girlfriend now. And it will stay the way from a while” she said with know hesitation. “Why me, you could have anyone. Literally anyone from this academy”

“I wanted you” “why?” “There is know, why?” Am confused, so confused. I just couldn’t wrap my head around it. “Think of this, you can date me. And Jake won’t mess with you know more. Call it a win win” “I never agreed to this Dorcas, don’t get me wrong. You are a beautiful person but I never agree to this. I don’t know you” she got down on my level and touched my knee. Somehow. I got this sense of relaxation from someone who loves to hurt people in their free time.

“Okay, you really want to know?” “Yes, I do. '' Dorcas looked at her sister. They both gave her a head nod, and walked out the room. Once the doors were closed she started talking. “Today in class, I heard some boys talking about how Jake had a special surprise for you this weekend. And it wasn’t good. For some reason I had a feeling to protect you” she stopped mid way to look away from me. “I needed to do something. I overheard them talking about how Jake was going to be the first one to have you”

I have been at the academy for over 3 years now. I keep up with school work. I have only one friend and try to make my family proud. Having to learn double the spells from being a New Orleans witch and A sister of the night. I didn’t want to get mixed in with the people here. And that means dating. I guess the boys are keeping track. I just never thought Dorcas Night would be too.

“I didn’t want that. So I claimed you before anyone else did. So like I said, date me. You are going to be under my sisters and I's protection . And no boy will try anything” I didn’t know how to feel about any of this. But it doesn't seem so bad. But at the same time. I never asked for this. “Am sorry Dorcas but I can’t. Am sure I I’ll be fine” I knew I fucked up when I walked out the door but everything was going wrong for me. I needed to keep my head in the game.

______

“Okay witches and warlocks, that’s us for today. You may now leave” I grabbed the rest of my things that I had for the day and started to walk out the door. Around the corner, I came to see the one and fuckin only Jake Hells. He was just so pushy. He had his back against the wall with his feet crossed. Once he saw me I tried walking past him. “Hey, Hey, Hey. You’re not gonna say Hi to me”. The more I think about it. Jake is such a pick-me boy.

“What do you want Jake” not even stopping, he was still in my ass. “So, are we still on for this weekend?” “Heavens I could never get a break from you. Why are you so pushy?”

“I know you fake that shit with Dorcas Night, so come on.” I should have thought through what I was going to do next. But I didn’t. I saw Dorcas walking down the Hall with her sisters. I looked at Jake in the face with a good gummy smile. The closer the sister got, I turned my body to the girls.

“Watch and see,” I said to him.

When my back was away from him, I gave Dorcas the ‘help me get this fucker away’ from me eyes. Her and the sister stopped 6 feet away from us. “Hello Dorcas, Hello sisters' ' The girls all said hello at the same time. I walked up to Dorcas, give her a kiss. At this point I wanted it to be real. To get Jake off my back. I even pulled my left hand in her neck to make the kiss go deeper.

I pulled away from her with a soft small smile. She grabbed onto my hand so I could be by her side. “Did my sister worry about what would happen if you go near her girlfriend again?” Prudence started off with. “You can just not take the hint?” Agatha finishes off. “Now we have to go back on my word” Dorcas had a stone cold face.

“Sleep well tonight” they all said together.

Not giving Jake enough time to respond, Prudences pushed him out the way. Not far along, Dorcas had both of her hands on my arm. She leaned her chin on my shoulder.

“So what made you change your mind, my love” she whispered in my ear. I looked to my right to see her with a soft smile. “Maybe this won’t be a bad idea, I just want to know what comes out of it for you” I told her

“Like I said, I want you. And now I got you

Part 2?

[bandsandwristbands]

*slams the door* I SAW YOU MENTIONING OC HI

Do you have any original characters? And do you post them somewhere if that's the case? *O*

Shshhddvjdd I am going to disappoint you lol

Technically I do have OCs but I don't give them a ton of public attention or thought because they're usually some sort of self insert (cringe) or a supplemental character to fill out mundane roles or to facilitate an extremely delusional scenario of mine.

So I don't have fully thought out character sheets but I mention them in passing in fics usually (I don't like *background* characters, in real life you vaguely know all your coworkers names and there are tertiary friends in a group, etc, so I just like mentally filling those in) so you can't find em anywhere but I'll post about a couple Naruto ocs here for you 👉👈

Firstly there's Fazluna who is mentioned in my recent fic snippet and included in the vaguest way in this post

She heads guard/security scheduling, vacations, pto, medical leave for the corps etc

She's really good at her job but she's a little awkward, not shy per se but has a difficult time disagreeing with her superiors because she wants to do a good job but she does it anyways because sometimes your boss is stupid and wrong and she wants to do a good job

Also I just really wanted a Sunan girl with some middle eastern energy and to be visibly religious for my Suna Religion AU

Second Ayana Aburame

Shino's chill younger sister, she hangs out with Hinatas younger sister Hanabi (same age group) she's also trans (and is a little jaded because she faced harassment for it), she's quiet like Shino but she doesn't take anyone's shit, she'll get in your face like "wtf are you looking at" or like "don't fucking talk to me no you can't buy me a drink or sit with us, asshole" she's fun at parties and gives excellent tough love pep talks. (She's really inspired by my most assertive irl girlfriends who I always thought were so cool because I am a people pleaser)

Aniyah

She's a DJ and producer and is the definition of "I listen to every genre", she's the ultimate hype girl and loves pushing people out of their shell and encouraging them to be confident/carefree. A true girls girl. Excellent karaoke friend.

She's from the cloud village, she's friends with Karui and tight with Kankuro after introduction and eventually gets pretty friendly with Gaara too. (Gets him wasted and dancing on tables with her at a random after party once that no one is allowed to talk about)

She thinks everyone is hot all the time and should absolutely be flexing it. Very artsy in general. She's a dancer, and physically affectionate, throws ass on everyone, will kiss the homies on the mouth if you let her.

She was very much inspired into existence when I was planning out my Sand Sib Punk Band AU

[the-eldritch-it-gay]

My abuela (derogatory) asked me what I wanted for Christmas because she celebrates Christmas and doesn’t care if I don’t. And I know it’s mean but I like. Just didn’t respond. In part bcuz again I don’t celebrate Christmas like I’m not even taking time off from work lr anything. The other thing though is that I have historically given my abuela like, links to shops I like, links to specific items I would like, general items or ideas of what sort of things I like. And like, she barely if ever actually would give a shit about that. Like I for my birthday would say what I wanted and like put together a big assortment of links to items and shops and stuff but she claimed she doesn’t like buying from Etsy (meanwhile she talks with my mother and sister about all the things she likes to get from Etsy and have gotten them gifts from Etsy). So I even put together like items on like Amazon or just like major retailer sites like Target or w/e and even made sure to not put anything that was more than like 40$ and she instead just bought me a sauce pan that she got on clearance somewhere for like $15 while other people got gifts that cost even upwards of 100$. I asked for jewelry once and she got my sister and other people jewelry and got me a rainbow hat she got at a gas station. Not to mention that if I don’t immediately thank her for her gift in a convincing enough way then not only does she shame me but she will verbally abuse and harass my mother about it.

So like. What’s the point. You know. She doesn’t care that I don’t celebrate the holiday. She refuses to actually give me something I want. If she gets me something I have to preform thankfulness or it becomes a weeks long family drama. Why should I even talk to her let alone give her ideas for gifts I want that she won’t listen to.

[hot-crossedbuns]

being trans is so weird.

I'm trans masc. in transitioning towards presenting more masculine. if I could I would have a hysterectomy and top surgeryl right now.

but I just saw a Reddit thread about "girl secrets" and I found myself in the comments of hundreds of people describing the mundane aspects of their womanhood, like making sure you get the leftovers out when you shower at the of of you period or the weird adjustment thing you have to do with your boobs sometimes when trying to sleep.

My hair has always been a source of dysphoria for me, always being complimented on my hair, long and thick, natural highlights and gentle curls. all I ever wanted until I finally gave in at 17 was to chop it all off. I'd get a buzz cut if it meant people stopped seeing me from behind and immediately clocking me as a girl because it went right down my back even in my ratty ponytail.

but I saw this tiktok on how women often swoosh their pony tails behind them when they walk, because it's fun. and it is! I always found some joy in that before I finally cut it off and felt pride in my hair for the first time ever.

my co-workers are all women, cisgender women who don't know that I'm not one of them. to them I'm just the short haired lesbian that works shifts with them. but this means they include me in their monthy girls nights and I get to feel the joy of being the inside of some secret club I never really felt a part of as a kid. it's fun hearing them chat shit about their exes, talk about those weird things that only happen to women because of our anatomy.

and yet, I'm taking steps to turn away from that, because while these spaces are safe and familiar to me, they what's felt unnatural and like I was intruding on something not meant for me.

I'm taking these steps to look and be seen the way that makes me confident and empowered, and yet I'm time I'll lose the experience of talking to random women fixing their make up in the at the mirrors in public toilets, or seeing 5 drunk women tell a random stranger she's beautiful when they find her ex left her for someone prettier.

Men don't have that support. and I'll lose that forever when I transition.

and yeah, once I visibly transition I don't have to be as afraid of walking home at night, and yeah i won't have to hear drunk old men hit on me after telling me I look like their grandaughters, and yeah I won't have to deal with sexist jokes made at my expense by my guy friends.

but once women stop seeing me as a woman and start seeing me for me, suddenly my past, my whole childhood, where i believed I would be a woman the rest of my life, suddenly changes meaning.

if I were to talk about those weirdly sexual and creepy comments my best friends boyfriend made for months, it's just guys being dudes. if I mention the time my boss's boyfriend smacked my ass during a busy shift, it's just a bro tap. if I mention how random guys at work often try to hug me or hold my hands or call me pet names, it stops being harassment and just starts being guys messing about.

if I mention how my cramps can immobilise me, or how much I hate wearing tampons or how dogs do that weird thing where they just keep sniffing your crotch or how sometimes my ovary cramps and it's rock hard beneath the skin, or how frustrating it is when your period comes 2 days early and ruins the underwear you liked or it's a week late for absolutely no god forsaken reason and your hormones are all over the place, and you're moody, tired, angry, sad, hungry bloated and nauseous all at once, they're just look at me all funny because his could I, someone who looks and presents as a guy, possibly know what it's like to be a woman.

as if I didn't live as one for 20 years.

as if I didn't plan to live my life as a woman.

as if I didn't grow up being someone's daughter, sister or niece.

as if I didn't expect to be someone's mother, wife or aunt.

being trans is weird, because once you realise it, all of your life experience slowly stops mattering.

it's weird because yes I want the world to separate me from who they always assumed I would be, yes I want them to stop seeing me as that little girl who didn't quite know how to be a girl. yes I want them to see me the way I've always felt I was supposed to be... but I don't want them to only see the masc side of me.

my girlhood, my femininity, my lived experience as a female in the 21st century all helped shape who I am now, and just because I'm trans doesn't mean that goes away.

but no one really sees that.

and yeah, it's a good thing, it means the world is finally starting to see me for who I've always known myself to be.

but knowing that part of me is slowly fading is weird.

being trans is so weird.

and so frustrating.

all at once.

[sam-loves-seb]

wip wednesday

happy wip wednesday !!

haven't done one of these in a while but i have so many wips going on right now that i haven't and/or can't start posting yet and i'm itching to get some of this out there in the world

tagging: anyone who wants to share a bit of their wip !

this one's going to be kind of a longer one so i'll put it under the cut:

***

Ian stands frozen on the floor.

He thinks he can make it back to the kitchen without Mickey seeing him if he moves now, right fucking now before he finishes paying and turns around, so Ian tries to scoop up his bin, the table only half cleared, but he bangs his knee into the side of the booth and the silverware rattles loudly.

Mickey looks over at him suddenly, and it’s like Ian can’t breathe.

There’s a buzz—a thrill—that thrums through his body. It starts just under his sternum and goes all the way out to his fingers and his toes. His face feels hot, his cheeks definitely pink by now, and his hands twitch on the bin, suddenly too energized to stay still.

“Fuck,” Mickey mutters, then turns back to Fiona. “Does your whole fucking family work here now, or did you guys move into the back room?”

“It’s just me and Ian,” she tells him easily, handing him his change. “Debbie’s… visiting.”

Debbie makes a noise. “Debbie is just trying to eat her pancakes while she gets harassed by her bitch of a sister.”

Ouch. Ian watches the near imperceptible flinch on Fiona’s face and knows that one had to hurt.

“What for?” Mickey asks, glancing at Ian again briefly before turning his attention on Debbie.

That look is enough to get Ian moving again, quickly clearing away the lasts of the coffee mugs and water cups. He feels… He doesn’t know what he feels. Only knows that he does feel which is more than he’s been able to say in a long time.

“She wants to kill my baby,” Debbie answers.

“What baby?”

“The one growing inside of me.”

“You’re pregnant?” Mickey asks incredulously, eyebrows jumping high before furrowing in confusion. “You’re like… twelve.”

Debbie glares at him. “I’m fifteen.”

“Same shit.”

“Mickey!” Fiona says suddenly, like she just had an idea. “You have a kid.”

Mickey blinks. “Yeah.”

“Can you talk some sense into Debbie and tell her how much it sucks?”

Ian’s hand hovers over the last mug he sets in the bin. He waits for it, turns his head and looks for it.

Mickey thumbs his lip, sort of shrugs. “S’not that bad.”

Fiona rolls her eyes.

Debbie beams.

And Ian? Well, Ian fucking laughs.

It’s a short, single puff of air, but it’s loud enough to get Mickey’s eyes back on him. He glares at Ian, his jaw clenched and his eyes cold, and it makes Ian’s blood sing.

“Since when?” Ian spits out in pure disbelief.

“Since none of your fucking business,” Mickey bites back without hesitating.

Ian opens his mouth to reply, but—

“Maybe if you’d actually stuck around, you’d know.”

Ian flinches at that. His body actually lurches back half an inch like he’s been burned, and he starts to remember the kind of pain the boy standing across from his is capable of inflicting.

He kind of wants him to do it again.

“Okay, Mickey,” is all he says instead.

He grabs his bin full of dirty dishes and turns towards the kitchen, reveling in the feel of Mickey’s eyes on the back of his head the entire way there.

Once he’s out of sight though…

Ian drops the bin loudly on the counter. “Fuck!” he whisper-shouts, running his hands through his hair.

He feels like he might die. Like his heart is beating so hard it’ll break his ribs, like it’ll beat right out of his chest. His body is on fucking fire, and his hands are shaking.

He’s… angry.

He thinks.

Ian honestly can’t tell the difference anymore. Ever since he got on his meds, even after they stabilized him and leveled him out, he’s been in this fog. It’s thick and it’s heavy and it makes everything feel almost exactly the same.

Like nothing at all.

Until Mickey fucking Milkovich walks into his place of work and orders lunch and talks to his sisters like he knows them well—because he does, doesn’t he? He knows them better than most after all the time he’s spent at the Gallagher house over the last few years.

He looks at them like they were friends, once, maybe. In another life. But he looks at Ian with hatred in his curled fists and anger in his clenched jaw and something—something—that he’s desperate to hide behind the cold, empty façade in his eyes.

And Ian—yeah, Ian kind of hates him a little bit too.

But there’s more, so much more, bubbling just under the surface, just out of reach, and as Ian is desperate to grasp at it, to understand it, the adrenaline from the confrontation starts to ebb. The fog starts to settle around his peripheral once again, and he puts his palms on the edge of the sink and curls his fingers over the edge, gripping hard to the cool metal basin.

***

-- an excerpt from a sbb fic coming to an archive near you in 2024

[imperial-topaz2003]

Imperial-Topaz ranks SWTOR Romances

To mark my return, I decided to do a SWTOR ranking, this time with the romances. I'm gonna stick with just vanilla ones for now, and do expansions at a later time. Also, I'm not doing any of the 'one-shot' romances, or I'll be here till the next century. Again, this is just my opinion, let me know what you think on these romances in the comments or reblogs. Anyway, this is gonna be a chonkey one, so let's get into it.

19. Kaylio Djannis

What a surprise. Anyway, she's down here for one reason in particular. She's literally the only romance option that fucking cucks you.

Yup. Honestly, Kaliyo is such an unlikable piece of shit. She trash talks you even if you're flirting with her and probably doesn't see you as anything more than a one night stand. I don't wanna look at this bitch no more. Next! 18. Doc

Yeah, you know how I feel about Doc already. The walking sexual harassment lawsuit who can't take 'no' for an answer. If you're a female knight who doesn't want to romance him (or at least wants to take things easy and not rush), you're in for an uncomfortable time. But what if you're into his flirts and return them? Is the relationship a bit healthier? I suppose, but his attitude makes it hard for me to take his commitment seriously. I just have this feeling that he'll run off to bang a hotter chick if given the opportunity. I mean, he already fled a wedding once.

So yeah, fuck Doc and his ugly ass crowbar mustache. 17. Nadia Grell

Before you crucify me, I like Nadia, okay? She's a great character. Her romance on the other hand is...eugh. There is a lot of unfortunate implications. You guys already know I'm not a big fan of Padawan and Apprentice relationships, it's just creepy for me. Also, you start romance literally after her father dies. I'm serious, it almost plays into the Sex for Solace trope. Also, the Consular is coded to be an older person, while Nadia is really young. I mean, ngl, I don't mind age difference as long as both parties are the age of majority (which, to give credit, they are) but still. Honestly, I just like Nadia better as a surrogate daughter/little sister to the Consular.

16. Corso Riggs

Yeah, Corso is...not the best in my opinion. I'll give him credit, he's got good looks and plenty of gentlemanly charm if you're into that sorta thing. But then again, his romance setup pretty much forces you to take advantage of him while he's drunk. Already that bumps him down a few spots for me. Personality wise, I find his whole 'don't hurt woman at all' shtick to get really old, especially when he does it towards women who are actively trying to kill him and the Smuggler. Buddy, you can defend yourself and still be a Gentleman at the same time. His jealousy also kinda gets on my nerves. Not my cup of tea, but I won't judge anyone who picks him.

15. Jaesa Willsaam (Dark side)

Some may not like that I put her this high, but the reason Dark!Jaesa is above the last four for me is simple: the entertainment value. Honestly, her romance is also roughly how I feel about her character: not actually 'good' per say, but so hilariously over-the-top and edgy, that I can't help but laugh. A perfect fit for a chaotic dark side Sith Warrior. However, as a genuine love interest? Not the best. There's better options you can pick for that. Also, I'm not discussing in this list Light!Jaesa, since I believe that's an expansion-only romance.

14. Raina Temple

Alright, done with the bad, now we can move onto the good, starting with Raina. She's alright in my opinion. I don't have much to say, honestly. I like her whole everywoman theme, she's cute, she's got some complexity to her, and she's not Kaliyo. Not an absolute fav, but she's good in my book.

13. Andronikos Revel

Again, not much to say. Revel's got a good arc to him: starts off casual and laid-back, but once you get to know eachother, he opens up and it becomes more serious. I also like how he's flirtatious and not an absolute creep about it...unlike a certain someone... So yeah, simple and sweet. 12. Risha Drayen

Don't have much to say for Risha, either. I like her, but I'm not crazy for her. I will admit, I do have a soft spot for the whole princess x rogue type of romance, and she is a pretty likable and personable character. I just prefer the other romance option for smugglers, but we'll get to that in a bit. 11. Felix Iresso

Someone give this man a hug, a blanket, and some snacks. He did not deserve any of the shit he went through. Hurt/comfort aside, I like Felix. He's calm, mature, friendly, and straight-forward in a good way. I know I sound like a broken record, but honestly, I am having trouble of what to say. Moving on! 10. Ashara Zavros

The one thing holding Ashara back for me is the master/apprentice dynamic. That's really the only problem I have with her romance. I just find it creepy. That aside, Ashara's pretty good. I love her character arc of her realizing the conflict between Jedi and Sith isn't as Black and White as she initially thought it was, and how it ties into her romance. I especially like romancing her with a Light Sided Inquisitor. It's just so sweet.

P.S. They did her dirty in KOTFE 9. Vector Hyllus

I know how beloved Vector is and some people are really not gonna like me not putting him the top 5. That's only because I only did his romance once. However, I did enjoy that playthrough. Vector is a very wholesome and quirky character with some interesting romantic themes. I'll have to play through him again someday. 8. Akaavi Spar

Man, I love warrior women. Especially ones who soften up over time, just like Akaavi here. I honestly have a soft spot for characters who completely wall themselves off from everyone else, but slowly begin to let other people into their boundaries as they open up. I know some people might not like me putting her over Risha, but I can't help it. Akaavi is just great.

7. Torian Cadera

Once more, not a whole lot to say, but I do enjoy Torian. His loyalty and courage are always endearing. One of my favorite moments in this game is reciting Mandalorian wedding vows with him. IDK why, but it's just so adorable for me. He, the Hunter, and Mako are an OT3 of mine. 6. Elara Dorne

Elara's romance is pretty adorable. She slowly begins to fall for you, spends time trying to adjust to a more casual relationship, and even goes out of her way to fill out heaps of paperwork and bypass regulations just so she can be with you. I love it. The one downside for me is the fact that you're her CO and she's technically sleeping with the boss. I don't hate it as much as the master/apprentice thing, but it does come a bit close. Other than that, she's great.

5. Malavai Quinn

Kicking off my top 5 is Quinn. The reason he's not number 1 is because I have a few issues with his romance. For one, you can turn the relationship very possessive and abusive as a dark side character. It's pretty scummy that the game lets you do that, and there is a sadly not insignificant amount of people who like to take that route. I won't call names, but still, it can get a bit iffy. On the other hand, if you're passive with him and respect his boundaries, his romance is considerably sweeter. It's really rewarding to see him show his undying loyalty and affection for you if you're not aggressively demanding it from him, and I love how you can rebuild your relationship after the Quincident. Really wish more people would go down that route. 4. Mako

Honestly, Mako has one of my favorite companion dynamics in the whole game, romance or not. She's charismatic and quirky gal to contrast to the generally gruff and straightforward bounty hunter, but still badass enough to keep up with them. And the romance, again, is pretty wholesome...and I'll leave it at that. Just plain cute and heartwarming. 3. Vette

Vette's dynamic with the Warrior is pretty much about the same as Mako's with the hunter. Which is why I really like her. I'm a big sucker for noble x commoner type relationships. Also in comparison to Malavai's, I like to take things slow with her, too. Instead of pushing every flirt button, it's wholesome to see her slowly come to a decision on her own and profess her love to the Warrior. NGL, though, I absolutely love how she literally jumps with joy upon being proposed to. Oh, and BioWare, how dare you make me choose between Torian and her! 2. Aric Jorgan

It's grumpy cat time. Another trope I have a soft spot for is the Defrosting Ice Queen (or King in this scenario). I love it when characters don't initially hit it off at first, but eventually warms up to eachother. Sure, when rushed, it comes off as contrived and unbelievable, but when done right, it's just amazing.

And Jorgan is just that, his friendship/romance evolution with the Trooper is a bit slow, but also believable. By the end of the story, he ends up straight up dedicated towards you. I also love how flustered he can get in romantic situations. Now if only BioWare made him bisexual... 1. Kira Carsen

@swtorpadawan and @magicallulu7 are gonna like this. Anyway, Kira might just be my favorite vanilla SWTOR companion. Playful, snarky, but still goodhearted and brave. And throughout the years, she'd still remained a favorite, both character and romance wise. I know, master/apprentice stuff, but I never see the Knight as her master. I see them more as Jedi partners (and perhaps more) if anything. I really like how you do help her overcome her past trauma and develop into a more responsible figure. Honestly, making her Bisexual in Onslaught was a chad move...if only BioWare did that for other companions. Conclusion

Holy fuck, that was a lot! Either way, I hope you guys enjoyed this ranking. If you disagree, please don't flame me for my opinions, or else I will cry. instead, tell me how you'd change the rankings and what your favorites are.