#she's so the banality of evil to me

[thelongestwalk]

miss bouchard stealing files and looking good doing it (outfit from this twitter post)

[dereknaga]

A lover of the idea of Kronos as a good father, at least in the fics

I don't know if it's just me but I imagine Cronus as a good father to Percy and he loves that, to some extent, Percy is a great daughter and Cronus's princess, i.e. his favorite, so the reason he ascends is not because of something as banal as his revenge against his children, but rather it is based on two things: the first is that he is a jealous father and he heard in Tartarus that there is a god or several gods among them. His son Zeus and his grandson Apollo along with other gods do not want his daughter, his princess, to marry and he tries to rise in ancient Greece but fails which puts him in a bad mood. And he hears that Asta had children (Dionysus, Asclepius, and many more), which makes him angry because he thinks she is being forced or raped. Which makes him hold a great grudge against them, but he looks for a way to save both his daughter and his grandchildren from their evil parents. Second, when I heard that she died, I was in denial for a long time and Luke comes to say that he thinks he saw her and that she possibly believes in him and believes that she faked her death and supports him in the shadows because he is afraid of the gods so to defeat Olympus, no matter how far or how low he has to go, to save his princess, he will do it. PS: my language is not English, I'm using Google Translate for this, sorry if I don't understand it.

[sepublic]

Another thing I’ve noticed about Wittebane fans is that they would really rather speculate on an unseen dynamic and how codependent it was, or on Belos having religious trauma or being a socially awkward child (despite this conflicting with him being a confident, silver-tongued politician) over like. Discussing Belos’ character as he actually is onscreen.

And onscreen Belos is about Christian colonialism, he IS the religious trauma. He’s the white saviorism, the racism, the genocide, the arrogant delusions of Puritans. These are actually onscreen, and darker and deeper than like, the Wittebanes being Cain and Abel or Saturn devouring his son because what are you actually discussing here that’s topical?

But fans don’t want to talk about that, they don’t want to talk about what makes Belos his own character and what makes his writing work. They want to make Belos and Caleb into a racist, less interesting version of the Nocedas, Clawthorne sisters, Collector, etc. And when Belos doesn’t measure up to these standards because he’s a square peg being put through a round hole, fans get angry at the writers. It’s alienating to those who want to discuss Belos, the actual Belos.

And I think it boils down to fans being discomforted by topics such as colonialism and genocide, and facing just how intertwined Belos is with depicting it on a large and personal scale; He isn’t even a metaphor at this rate, but a literal example of a Christian white man from a 1600s American colony. These subjects are not something fans can romanticize, so they focus on the dynamic with his brother, on being codependent or tortured or suffering from religious trauma, etc.

It’s very faux-deep, it’s pretentious in a Dark Academia way, Cannibalism as a metaphor for love. It reminds me of fans who claim to love Dark Fics and can handle dark topics, but then implode when you ask them to discuss critical race theory. They think they’re being subversive and even punk but it’s just white guys in the end. It thinks itself deeper just for being ‘darker’ but it’s not even that dark compared to other things, it’s just edgy. King and Steve’s conversation as a stand-in for Dana’s ruminations on God are genuinely deeper than every Cain-Abel Wittebane fic.

There’s a Vtuber who just did an Owl House marathon and while she didn’t pick up on a lot, the discussion on Belos by fans who are explaining it to her is so refreshing, because there’s no mention of Caleb! There’s no mention of Belos being repressed or feeling abandoned. It’s all about how he actually is onscreen and is presented and what he does onscreen. It’s about the delusions and evil of those who practice Puritan ideology. And the actions that have far more impact than killing his brother.

And it makes me think, this is another reason why we don’t see Caleb; Because the writers knew fans would use him as a distraction from the actual things they’re discussing and satirizing through Belos. They would use him as a distraction from the true motives, the banality of evil, as Belos does; And Belos himself doesn’t even do it that much, he’s upfront about how he thinks witches are inherently evil and need to be killed in the name of God so even he is avoiding factoring Caleb into the discussion! Alas, the writers underestimate just how far fandom will go when they get even a scent of a possible white guy.

Can we talk about the Wittebanes as they actually are instead of retreading other characters’ old ground? The tragedy of the Wittebanes isn’t about some lonely orphan just wanting to be accepted by his community, being unable to handle the thought of his brother leaving, and not knowing any better because that’s just how things were back then; It’s about seeing your kid brother embrace the alt-right pipeline because white supremacy makes him feel special, and no matter how many years you spend trying to change his mind, he eventually, finally turns on you too.

[tryandbehappy]

Is Nick a Nazi? Let’s talk.

This is a question that’s come up again and again in The Handmaid’s Tale especially this season, both among the characters and the fandom. People in the show and in real life label Nick as part of “them,” as one of the bad guys.

So let’s break this down, through the lens of history, ethics, and good storytelling.

1. What does it really mean to be a Nazi?

Historically, being a Nazi didn’t just mean “working for the regime.” It meant believing in the ideology: racial superiority, totalitarian control and the dehumanization of others.

It meant actively enforcing and spreading those ideas.

There’s a key distinction that emerged after World War II especially in the work of philosopher Hannah Arendt, who coined the term “the banality of evil.”

She described how people could participate in horrific systems not because they were monsters, but because they were passive, conformist, afraid or just trying to survive.

In that context not everyone in the system was a true believer. Some were swept up in it. Some chose survival over resistance. And morally that’s still complicated but it’s not the same as actively endorsing and spreading evil.

(It’s a very sensitive topic for me, considering my homeland is sliding into a fascist regime. I was able to leave because I had the means but not everyone close to me did. And they have their reasons without them being true believers. It’s complicated)

2. So where does Nick fall?

Nick is not a Nazi. He is not an ideologue.

He’s a man who got pulled into the regime early, when he was very young, poor, and desperate and who found a way to survive inside it while helping others however he could. I love that they even showed he used to spy on the commanders — the actual bad guys — and get them punished, back when he was still an Eye.

He doesn’t believe in Gilead . we’ve seen it so many times: the way he rolled his eyes when Serena was praying over June’s pregnant belly, how he didn’t care when his wife cheated on him, how he didn’t want to consummate the marriage or even get married in the first place. He doesn’t push Gilead’s values — he hates them.

He doesn’t take pleasure in the power it gives him.

In fact, we see him:

• Risking himself to help June, Moira, Luke. He was willing to help Rita. He saved the resistance letters from being destroyed (June almost burnt them down) and got them out of Gilead

• Showing compassion, repeatedly not just to June, but to Eden, to marthas when they were blaming June. He cried over the previous handmaid who took her life and promised he’d take care of the next one and yes, he really did 😏

• Avoiding cruelty. He doesn’t punish. He doesn’t exploit.

• Carrying deep guilt and emotional restraint — not because he’s cold, but because he’s feeling too much. Being so drowned in guilt, he ended up devoting himself to June as his only way of redeeming himself

He is a man inside the system but not of it.

3. Why do people in the show label him anyway?

Because from the outside, it’s easier to judge than to understand (and in real world it’s the same)

He wears the uniform. He has the title. He lives in a commander’s house. HE’S A TERRIBLE MAN

People like Luke and even June, at times see only the surface and refuse to look beyond it. They’re clouded by their own self-judgment and an obsessive need to be perfect all the time.

But that’s the tragedy.

Because Nick is living in a constant gray zone, walking the tightrope between protecting those he loves and not losing what’s left of himself.

(And also because he’s the lead and they need drama)

4. What makes him different?

He’s not passive and he’s not power-hungry.

He’s careful and strategic. And he’s so strong in it. The youngest commander ever. Even tuello noticed “it takes talent” - “just staying out of trouble”

But underneath that there is no cruelty, only exhaustion.He’s not motivated by dominance.

He’s motivated by love, guilt, and the hope of doing something right in a world where everything feels wrong. And his rank as a commander gives him more opportunities, to help others, and to stay alive himself.

5. Why doesn’t Nick just leave Gilead?

Because it’s not that simple and it’s not because he believes in it. He stays because he’s no one outside of it. Because he’d be in danger as a commander, a man with blood on his hands (he could face trial, be locked in jail or be killed)

Because no one’s waiting for him out there. Because he no longer believes in governments or saviors, he’s seen too much.

Because running means facing the version of himself he was before: lost, broken, desperate. Also he doesn’t know the world outside and it was highlighted in the flashbacks (“I didn’t have much of a life before all of this”). Because escaping Gilead is treason and treason means death, even for a commander.

And because now, he’s married to a pregnant woman, and leaving would destroy her life too.

But still he chooses love and want to run away with June. Nick has no political ambition in Gilead.

6. So is it fair to judge him?

It’s human to want things to be simple: heroes and villains, good and evil. But Nick forces us into the uncomfortable middle.

He makes us ask:

What would you do if you were him?

What would you sacrifice? Would you sacrifice your life?

How would you survive without becoming the monster?

Because that’s the real conflict of The Handmaid’s Tale: not just the system, but the moral wreckage it leaves inside everyone who touches it.

Nick is not a saint. But he’s not a monster either. And absolutely not one of “them” (yes June, it hurt a lot 🥲)

[juuuuunaaaaaooooo]

She's Different

Thanos x fem reader : Angst, fluff, smut, mention of drugs, using of drugs, mention of death, blood, gore, mention of attempt suicide. The reader is a virgin so... Loss of virginity. Happy ending! THIRD POV! The Reader isn't Korean!

Chapter 4/? : The Third Game (Chap 1/Chap 2/Chap3)

Summary : The smut is here!!!!!!! (Finally)

A/N : I completely forgot his necklace during the smut part... Oops^^

MDNI! 18+ content under the cut

“The third game will begin momentarily.”

She mumbled as she heard the voice coming from the speakers. She tried to get up, but two strong arms held her against a warm body.

She slowly raised her head and met Thanos’s sleepy, but mischievous, gaze.

“Shit!” She almost jumped to get away from him. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize, señorita. It was one of the best nights of my life.” He tucked a lock of hair back behind her ear.

She almost choked on her saliva. Her face must have turned red already. How could he be always so direct and casual? It was as if he says banalities.

It was also one of the best nights she’d ever had too, serene, long, and restful. Unlike him, she couldn’t just tell him. It was too... embarrassing.

She didn’t have time to give him a rational word, even though she wouldn’t have been able to, because Nam-Gyu climbed onto the bed as if he’d been invited.

He ignored her completely and asked Thanos for a colored lozenge.

She started to get up to leave, but Thanos grabbed her by the sleeve. She looked at him and smiled. He looked almost like a puppy.

“I have to go to the bathroom before the game starts.” It wasn’t a complete lie.

The truth was, she couldn’t stay in the same space as player 124. He always looked evil, and then he seemed to hate her, for no reason at all. If she ever died in these games, she was sure it would be his fault.

Thanos hesitated before letting her go. She wasn’t sure if it was because she’d had a great night in his arms, or just because she was dreading this third game, but she winked at him before walking away.

As he popped a pastille into his mouth, she saw him follow her with a dazed look and an idiot smile.

~~~~~

The third room was almost spectacular. A giant carousel, adorned with a horse, was set up in the center of the room. Colorful gates surrounded the room.

“Welcome to your third game. The game you will be playing is Mingle. Let me repeat. The game you will be playing is Mingle.”

Thanos looked at his team members, smiling like a child. “Hey, we’ll be mingling together. Doesn’t that sound like so much fun?”

He was overexcited, so much so that he danced all the way to the merry-go-round, twirling around.

She looked at him, tenderly. He was so endearing.

“All players, please step onto the center platform. When the game starts, the platform will begin to rotate, and you will hear a number. You must form groups of that size, go into the rooms, and close the door within 30 seconds.”

Thanos takes her by the arm, surprising her. “I’m don’t let you.”

Touched, she tightened her grip on him. She wouldn’t let go of him either.

“What if it’s smaller than five?” She asked, already worried.

She knew the organizers were devious, and would do anything to make allies betray each other.

They all looked at each other until Se-mi said. “We’ll figure it out as we go.”

Surprising them all, the merry-go-round began to turn slowly, and a song echoed through the dimly lit room.

“Round and round. Clap! Round and round. Clap! Let’s go around in circles and dance. We will clap our hands and sing. Clap! La, la, la, la, let’s have fun dancing. Ring-a, ring-a, ring-a. Ring-a, ring-a-ring. Ring-a, ring-a, ring-a. Ring-a, ring-a-ring. We will go hand in hand. And have fun jumping around.”

Thanos spun his fist in the air, rhythmically, enjoying himself as if he were on a real carousel. Strangely enough, it helped her relax before the ride started.

The railway stopped abruptly, almost knocking them over. Then the female voice announced the number.

“Ten.”

The players began to shout out the number of people they needed to reach ten. Most of them were already five, thanks to the previous game. All they had to do was find another team still alive.

They had no trouble finding five more people. When the number was announced, a team of five approached them and invited them to join, which they did without hesitation.

With his arm still attached to hers, they ran as fast as they could to reach one of the doors before time ran out.

When she heard the click of the lock, she leaned against the wall and breathed a sigh of relief.

She didn’t know how long they stayed in the enclosed space, but it felt like an eternity.

The wait was even worse when the announcement of the eliminated players broke the tense silence.

When they were finally able to exit, they returned to the platform, avoiding the puddles of blood.

The merry-go-round began to spin, and the music started.

While Thanos and Nam-gyu were enjoying themselves, everyone else was dreading the sudden stop and the announcement of the number.

“Four.”

Shit... the first dilemma.

Thanos looked at Min-su and Nam-gyu as he thought... Well, not really, because he was in no condition to do so.

“Min-su, you’re out.” Just as he raised his foot to strike, she stopped him.

“Su-Bong, no!” She heard one of the players ask someone else to come over. “You four, go ahead. I’ll find someone.”

Thanos didn’t have time to react before he was dragged away by the other three. He turned his head in all directions, like a maniac, to see her.

Once locked in, he pressed his forehead against the skylight and swallowed hard. When he heard the first machine-gun fire, he shouted. “Señorita!”

At the sound of the click, he rushed outside. He couldn’t stand still, a veritable electric pile, and he knew it had nothing to do with drugs.

“Su-Bong!”

Thanos turned his head so fast that he felt his neck snap. He ran toward her and put his hands on her shoulders. “Never do that again!”

He took her hand in his, and squeezed it hard enough that she couldn’t pull away, but without hurting her.

She pressed his hand gently and gave him a smile. “Promise.”

Hand in hand, they returned to the center for the third round.

This time, Thanos moved his hands in the air from right to left, pulling her along with him, because their fingers were still intertwined.

“Three.”

Thanos took his head in his hands. “Okay, let me think.”

“You three go ahead. We’ll figure it out.” She pulled him by the hand so they could go and find a third person.

Instinctively, Thanos grabbed the first woman in his path and took her with them, without asking her opinion. “You come with us.”

As they reached one of the doors, someone pushed her, causing her to drop. She fell to the ground. “Ah!”

Thanos turned to help her, but Nam-gyu pushed him into the room and closed the door behind them.

“No!” Thanos rushed to the door to look for her, but he didn’t see her. Furious, he turned to Nam-su and slammed him against the wall, his forearm on his throat. “What’s your fucking problem?”

“What’s yours?”

“I swear, if she didn’t make it, you’ll be next!”

Thanos spun around like a caged lion in the narrow space. He held his head in his hands and shook it from side to side. The wait was agony.

When he heard the door unlock, he opened it with such force that it shattered against the wall. He desperately searched for his girl.

The door next to his opened slowly. First, he saw Min-su emerge, then Se-mi, and finally her.

Her head was bowed and her steps were shuffling, as if she were about to collapse. Before she could lose her balance, he rushed toward her, and held her by the elbows.

“Hey.”

She raised her head, her cheeks streaked with tears. When she saw that it was him, she wiped her tears with her sleeve and gave him a small smile. “Hey.”

“I’m sorry, I...”

She shook her head. “It’s not your fault.” She turned her head and glared at Nam-gyu, who was watching them.

Thanos followed her gaze. “You’re lucky. But you’re not coming close to her again!” There was no hint of a joke in his tone.

“All that for a pussy.”

Thanos was about to leap up and punch him, but she held him firmly.

The game wasn’t over yet. They had to keep going. This time, he wouldn’t let her go, even if it meant to carrying her on his back or like a princess until they were locked in one of the rooms.

By the time they were back in place, the tension was at its height.

“Six.”

Nam-gyu shouted. “One person! We’re missing a person!”

Thanos shoved him. “You’re dreaming. You’re out of the race.”

“You need me.” He spat.

“Thanos, there’s no time.” She looked at him pleadingly.

Se-mi brought a terrified-looking young man toward them. “It’s okay.”

“Shit. If you try anything again, I’ll kill you myself.”

Seeing that they only had ten seconds left, they sprinted to an orange door.

This time, they made it through in extremis.

They were all getting tired, and the increasing amount of blood on the floor didn’t help them relax. Their nerves were on edge.

The robotic voice announced the final round as the players climbed onto the turntable.

Thanos breathed a sigh of relief. Because of this game, he’d felt like he was on a thrill ride, but with his emotions.

“One more, then it’s over.”

Thanos felt her small hand tighten around his. “Yeah.” He offered her a smile and raised their intertwined hands. “What do you think it’ll be this time?”

“Two.”

“Why, Einstein?”

She nudged him at the nickname and stuck her tongue out at him. “There are 126 people left, and there are 50 rooms. So there won’t be enough rooms for everyone, only for 100 people.”

Thanos had no time to be impressed by her deduction when the number was announced.

“Two.”

Without missing a beat, they ran as fast as they could to a purple door.

She saw that Se-mi and Min-su were heading for the next door at the same speed. She didn’t even feel sorry for Nam-gyu, who was left behind. But she was sure the bastard would survive. He clung to life as a crab to a pair of balls.

She closed the door behind her and surprised Thanos by taking him in her arms. “We did it.”

She gave him a brilliant smile, which he returned. Thanos wrapped his arms around her and stroked her back comfortingly.

As their eyes locked on each other, Thanos slowly leaned in. Without hesitation, she closed her eyes and licked her lips.

“Game over.”

Still not feeling his lips on hers, she reopened her eyes and saw Thanos’s sneering gaze and shit-eating grin.

“Game over.”

She blushed and hid in his jacket, then pulled away from him almost immediately. She cleared her throat and said to him. “Come on, let’s go find out the results.”

~~~~~

Fuck! He almost kissed his princess. He didn’t even know why he’d stopped when he heard the voice of the other bitch behind the microphone.

Probably because he’d already imagined slamming her up against the wall and kissing her hungrily. He would have pulled down her pants, ripped off her panties and made her scream his name, so that all the other players still present could hear. He would have fucked her without concession.

But... He knew they wouldn’t have had time for that, and instead he’d have ended up with a huge, uncomfortable boner in his tracksuit.

Damn it! If only... Maybe they could find time to go to the bathroom, or wait until everyone was asleep.

Thanos shook his head. He mustn’t even think about it, or his erection would kick in. He needed to calm down and think about gross stuff.

She wasn’t making it easy. She was so beautiful, and since the end of the game, she’d been very tactile with him. Even when she wasn’t, their bodies were still touching, because they were standing so close.

Just as she had predicted, only a hundred players remained. The jackpot was 35 billion won. He would pocket 356 million won.

Thanos had just realized that, to be able to repay his debt in full, there would have to be just over 25 players left. Given the number of deaths in this third game, he knew that the next one would surely be a bloodbath, too.

Still, he would keep voting circles. He had no choice.

When it was time to vote, he couldn’t help but send a guilty glance toward his señorita, who was standing on the other side of the dividing line between the two groups.

She reassured him by gently shaking her head with a small smile.

She wasn’t angry with him. She knew he’d be there to protect her, and vice versa.

As Player 001 pressed the cross button, the guard in the triangular mask announced the end of voting.

For the first time, the vote ended in a tie, leaving him confused. Now what? What’s next?

“Wait, it’s a tie. What happens now?” One of the players asked.

“Clause 3 of the consent form. In the case of a tie, players will vote again.”

Another adds. “So when are we going to vote again?”

“To give you some time to think, the vote will be conducted tomorrow. Until then, please think carefully about your future.”

Of course they acted like they were doing them a favor.

Thanos didn’t have time to think about this equality, as the lights came back on, announcing the start of the meal.

~~~~~

Although she hardly spoke to anyone except Thanos, Se-mi, and Min-su, she was very observant.

Despite a failed attempt at dissimulation, she noticed that some players had had forks with their meal, which was strange, to say the least.

She quickly finished her dish to join Thanos and warn him. Maybe he’d had one, too. It would be better for him.

She waited until he was alone, then walked slowly over to his bed. She looked in all directions, making sure no one could hear their conversation.

When he raised his head, he smiled at her. She smiled back at him and climbed onto the bed, sitting next to him.

“What’s up, señorita?”

She leaned even closer to him, her breath caressing his chin. “Did you get a fork with your gimbap?”

“What?” Even though he normally spoke, his voice was rather loud. She put her index finger to his mouth. He raised his hands in surrender. She repeated her question, to which he replied in the negative, then added, almost boastfully. “I thought you were an intelligent woman?” She raised an eyebrow, not understanding. “You don’t eat pre-cut gimbap with a fork.”

She nudged his cheek with her hand, making him laugh. “I know that! That’s my point.” Her eyes turned serious and frightened.

Surprised by the change, Thanos wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “Beauty?”

She whispered, her voice trembling. “A few people had forks.”

He frowned. “What for?”

She raised her misty eyes to him. “They probably want us to kill each other, so there won’t be another tie.”

She was afraid. She’d seen how greed could make people violent. So, if they had something to kill, they’d do it without hesitation.

Thanos wiped away a tear that rolled down her cheek. “Hey, I won’t let anything happen to you.”

“It’s not for me that I’m afraid... It’s for you.” Because of his fiery temper, he had more enemies than friends.

Thanos widened his eyes, surprised that such a sweet woman was worried about him.

He stroked her cheek and tried to lighten the mood. “Fuck! Why didn’t they give me one?”

With his exaggerated pronunciation and mimicry, she couldn’t help but laugh.

He tapped her nose, smiling. “I prefer that. I won’t let go of you all night, I promise. But first, I’ve got to take a piss.”

She held him back by the sleeve, shaking her head. “Don’t go.”

“Hey, princess, nothing’s gonna happen to me. I’m going in, I’m relieving myself, and I’m coming right out, okay?”

“Don’t you wash your hands?” She wrinkled her nose in disgust.

He burst out laughing, not expecting this twist. “Okay, okay. I go in, open one of the doors, pull down my pants and boxers, pee, pull up my clothes, flush, get out, wash my hands, dry them off, and leave. Is that OK with you?”

“That’s better.”

He patted her still wrinkled nose. “I’m hurrying.”

“You better be!”

She may have been sweet, but her tone left no place for joking. She was almost threatening. He was sure that, if he didn’t speed, she’d kick his ass.

With a wink, he left her still sitting on his bed, to go to the bathroom.

~~~~~

As he was out of the cabin, Thanos came face to face with MG COIN.

“What do you want, you traitor?”

“Funny, you don’t have the same speech with your girlfriend.”

His nostrils flared. “Don’t talk about her!”

Myung-Gi stepped closer to him, as if seeking him out intentionally. “How selfish are you to force your girlfriend to keep playing?”

Thanos gently pushed him back. “You can talk, fucker! Two days ago, you were one of us. Whereas, your girlfriend wanted to leave since the beginning.”

“Unlike you, I know when to stop before it’s too late.”

Thanos let out a humorless laugh. “Don’t speak too soon.” He took a few steps toward him and dug his index finger into his forehead. “Next game, I’ll take care of player 222.”

Myung-Gi’s confident expression disintegrated. “Stay away from her, you bastard!”

Thanos smiled. He’d hit a nerve. He leaned over and whispered in his ear. “It all depends on you.”

“Asshole!” Player 333 swung his fist at Thanos, who dodged it.

Thanos retaliated by punching him in the cheek. Unfortunately, this little altercation alerted the other players in the bathroom.

A general brawl broke out between the two clans, round and cross.

Thanos grabbed Myung-Gi’s jacket and slammed him against the tiled wall, then grabbed him by the neck. He turned him over, causing his back to crash painfully against the floor.

Thanos raised his fist in the air, ready to strike. “Do you think she’ll forgive you if you kill me?”

Myung-Gi was surprised by the force of the first punch. After the third, Thanos screamed. “I told you not to talk about her, you son of a bitch!”

One punch followed another, without him being able to hold back. This motherfucker had crossed the line, so far that he had no remorse about ending his life. He clutched his throat so tightly that his face turned red.

But Thanos regained his senses when a player collapsed next to him, a fork stuck under his chin.

“Shit!”

He thought back to his conversation with her beauty, and her concern for him. He’d made her a promise, he couldn’t break it. Not with her.

He was willing to stop his bullshit on the outside for her. But for that, they had to survive... together.

Thanos reluctantly released Myung-Gi. “It’s your lucky day.”

He got to his feet and, without paying any attention to the others, he headed for the exit, carefully avoiding getting into the middle of the shit he’d caused.

On his way out, he noticed that the guards hadn’t moved a muscle. Their orders were not to intervene. His señorita was right, this had been their goal all along.

Returning to the dormitory, he saw her, still in his bed, waiting patiently for him. Her eyes were fixed on the door. When she saw him, her smile reached her ears.

He rushed over to her and slid into bed, next to her. She immediately took him in her arms, and said. “Thank you.”

For the first time in a long time, Thanos felt he’d make the right decision.

~~~~~

To everyone’s incomprehension, the announcement bell rang throughout the dormitory.

“The following players have been eliminated. Players 268, 299, 331, 401 and 404. End of list.”

She raised her head and looked at Thanos, who shook his head, almost apologetic. “You were right.”

She straightened and frowned. “Thanos?”

Thanos raised his hands in the air. “I swear I didn’t kill anyone.” He added, mumbling. “Even if the fight was a bit of my fault.”

She heard him and shook her head with a grunt. She didn’t have time to yell at him, though, because her attention was diverted by the bills falling into the huge floating piggy bank.

Suddenly, one of the green doors opened, followed by the other.

“Listen, Team O! We... We... When we were in the bathroom, those fucking X bastards tried to kill all of us!”

She let out a soul-splitting sigh. “Damn it! He’s not dead.”

Thanos looked at her, dazed, then smiled, proud of her. “Oh, so that’s your real face?”

She pushed her shoulder against his. “No! But... I admit, if you’d stuck it in with a fork, I wouldn’t have minded.”

He passed an arm around her shoulders. “Look who’s hiding her game.”

“I told you from the start that I watch crime shows. You’re the one not listening.”

He played with one of her strands hairs, wrapping it around his finger. “Are you sure you didn’t get a fork?”

She looked up, laughing. “No. I promise.” He nodded slowly, his lower lip hanging down.

The two clans, back from the bathroom, passed the buck to see who had started it.

“So, who’s telling the truth?”

“50/50.”

Player 100, unperturbed by the mess, asked. “Which side lost more people?” They all looked at each other dumbly. “All right, everyone! Let’s count the numbers!”

“Sorry señorita, we’ve still got to split up.”

Unable to hold it in, she let out a sigh. She put both hands over her mouth, embarrassed.

Thanos burst out laughing. “You miss me already?”

“In your dreams.”

She stood up and joined her side of the room.

After a count, which she found interminable, because they’d gone over it again and again, the result was three dead for the rounds versus two for the crosses.

She knew she shouldn’t be happy about these losses, but... If no one changed their vote, that meant the crosses would win, and so they could finally get out of here... Alive.

Her guilt evaporated when she heard the rest of her team thinking the same thing. Even if what had just happened was horrible, feeling bad wouldn’t bring back the dead. They must have been selfish, thinking only of their own survival.

“Attention, please. Lights out in 30 minutes. All players, please return to your beds and prepare for bedtime.”

As she waited quietly in bed, she overheard the conversation of a small group of people. It was player 456’s group. The one who had already participated in this horror.

She didn’t like gossip, but since the situation, she opened her ears wide so as not to miss anything.

“When the lights go out, the other team will attack us.”

“Really?”

“By killing us, they’d win the vote and the prize pot would increase.”

She put her hand over her mouth to stifle the sob that escaped. Then she decided to manifest herself. “Excuse me?” Everyone looked up at her, surprised by this presence they hadn’t noticed. She was used to it. “Has this happened before? The first time you played these games?”

Player 456 sighed. His eyes were off and his smile, apologetic. “Yes.”

She thanked him for his honest answer and lay back in bed, her fingers scraping the skin around her nails. She trembled with fear, but not just for herself.

She and Thanos had no forks. They’d have no way to defend themselves. The only way to escape would be to hide. But where?

Suddenly, she sat up. She glanced to the other side and saw that, as always, Thanos was in his own little world. Did he know? If so, did he care? Would he participate?

She made her way over to him under the glare of the other rounders. She nodded in his direction. “Follow me.”

It took Thanos a few seconds to react, but he followed her unquestionably. After all, she was smart, she knew what she was doing.

He may have looked stupid and over the moon, but he knew exactly what would happen tonight. Leaving her alone was out of the question. If she hadn’t come to him, he’d have found her in bed as soon as the lights went out.

With long strides, Thanos joined her in front of the corridor door, guarded by a masked man with a triangle.

“Excuse me, I’ve got a sudden urge before I go to sleep.” She used her softest voice.

The guard shook his head.

Thanos rested his arm against the wall beside the door. “Come on, it’s not like we can control our bladder.”

“Impossible. It’s not time anymore.”

She heaved a deep sigh, and wrung her hands in front of her. “Listen.” She leaned a little toward him and whispered. “I’m a... I’m a virgin.” Even with his mask on, she felt the guard’s eyes on her. But especially Thanos’s two black eyes. “If I’ll die here, I’d really like...” She swallowed. “You see?”

The man in pink swallowed hard as Thanos stifled a laugh. He coughed into his hand. “Fuck!”

“Please. Put yourself in my shoes. We’re not going to do anything wrong, just, you know, have fun.” She crossed her hands in front of her and blinked, hopping on the spot. “Please?” She batted her eyelashes.

After a few seconds of thought, he moved aside to let them pass.

They made their way to the women’s bathroom, watched over by another guard, who looked surprised to see them.

Just before closing the door, she added. “Oh, and if anyone wants to come in, could you knock three times, just to let us know? Just long enough for us to hide, or get dressed.” She gave him a wave of her hand. “Thanks!”

She closed the door, leaned against it and exhaled sharply.

“I can’t believe it worked.”

“Me neither.”

They went to sit against the far wall.

“You’re a damn good liar.” He held out his fist for her to punch. But she blushed and looked away, embarrassed. “Fuck! You weren’t lying!”

This time, her face turned crimson. She slapped him on the arm. “Don’t be an asshole!”

He raised his hands in surrender. “But it’s true that it’s a shame.”

“Shut up.” She buried her head between her knees, hiding her burning face. She let out a growl, telling him to change the subject. But what did she expect? Thanos could never leave her alone after that confession.

“I’m just saying I’m a super sexy guy, you’re a gorgeous woman and we’re alone in a bathroom, and...”

She lifted her head and nudged him, although deep down his compliment touched her, and stirred something in the pit of her stomach. “Oh my god! Really?”

He shrugged. “If the guard can’t hear us, he’s going to wonder.”

She grumbled. “He doesn’t have to listen.”

“Come on, Señorita.” He didn’t want to push her, but, damn it, he wanted to so bad.

“Even if I liked you, which I don’t.” (Lie) Thanos pouted adorably. “I wouldn’t do that in a filthy bathroom with a guy I met three days ago, when we’re fighting for our lives.” She added, mumbling. “Plus, we don’t have any condoms.”

Thanos, having heard her, snorted. “So, we’re just going to sit on the crapper floor, waiting until tomorrow for the new vote?”

She looked up at him, her eyes catching the blue outline of his lenses. “Exactly.”

She saw him roll his eyes and throw something invisible on the floor. As if he were disappointed. How could he be? He was Thanos. He must have had countless conquests, and she... she was plain, unlike Player 196.

“You’re no fun.”

“Not funny?” She turned her entire body toward him. “See, that’s why I don’t want to. For you, sex is just fun.”

“Of course it is. Otherwise, what would be the point?” She couldn’t help smiling. He really did have an answer for everything, even if it was moody sometimes. “It means you like me.”

Her eyes widened. “What? No. No!” She didn’t know if she was trying to convince him or herself. “I never said that!”

“You said, ‘That’s why I don’t want to.’”

His smug smile made her sigh. “I... Is this the moment you decide to use your brain?”

“You like me.”

“No! Argh, you’re infuriating!” She rose to move further away from him, but he held her by the arm and pulled her closer.

Thanos looked into her eyes and said in a deep voice. “I can show you that I can be very serious about this.”

She swallowed, unable to tear her eyes from his. He was incredibly handsome, but...

“We can’t.”

“No? Why?” His voice was much softer.

“Because...” She didn’t have an answer.

Her heart was pounding, she could feel her body boiling inside even though he hadn’t even touched her. She wanted him. Fuck! She wanted him so bad. Him and his stupid purple hair, his colorfully painted nails and his stupid rap!

Tomorrow, they might get out of this hellhole, but they might also die.

She looked at him again, and saw that, contrary to what many people might think, he wouldn’t do anything without her consent. Indeed, he made no move to approach her.

He was waiting for her to make the first move. And she did.

She leaned over, put her hand on his shoulder and kissed him.

Thanos tried to be gentle so as not to frighten her, but he wanted her so much, he couldn’t help grabbing her hips to bring her closer to him and deepen the kiss.

Hearing her let out a surprised little moan, he smiled against her mouth.

When they parted to catch their breath, they looked at each other for a few seconds silently.

She wasn’t sure whether it was his bluish lenses, or his colored pastilles, but his eyes were so dilated that they were entirely black, like a cat. She could see herself in them, and saw that hers were in the same state.

Not wanting to think about the fact that this would be her first time, she let herself go completely. She trusted him.

She climbed onto his lap, straddling him, clutched his green jacket for courage and plunged to his lips for a second kiss.

This time, Thanos didn’t hold back. He pushed his tongue into her mouth for a fiery kiss. He ran his hands under her jacket and T-shirt, then dug his varnished fingers into her sides. He didn’t care if it left a mark on her, and judging by the little moan she let out, she didn’t seem to care either.

He brought one of his hands up, and clasped it in her hair, pulling it gently. She moved slightly away from him and leaned her head back to give him better access to her neck.

Thanos didn’t hesitate, attacking her neck almost ferociously, devouring her like a thirsty vampire.

She closed her eyes in pleasure and caressed his chest through his jacket. But that wasn’t enough, she wanted to feel him, so she unzipped his jacket.

Thanos pulled away from her neck, and with a toothy grin, he rolled it over his shoulders and tossed it against the white tiles. “Impatient?” She’d be lying if she said no, so she merely nodded. “Yeah, it’s Thanos effect.”

She rolled her eyes. “Don’t ruin this.”

Thanos dipped his lips once more. In turn, he removed her jacket, which she tossed aside to join his. Then he detached himself from her to remove his own T-shirt.

Seeing all his hidden tattoos, she licked her lips. Shyly, she mapped out each line, memorizing them with her index finger. She lingered the one running from his middle finger, to behind his ear.

Feeling a little braver, she leaned forward, and followed the path her finger had previously drawn, with her lips.

As she delicately kissed each ink stain, Thanos watched her, hypnotized. Every time she placed a kiss on his skin, his muscles twitched and his hair stood on end.

He wasn’t used to such gentleness during sex, even during preliminaries. He’d always thought it would bore him. And yet, he’d never been as excited as he was now.

Letting himself go, he closed his eyes and sighed, the back of his head banging gently against the wall.

She straightened up and moved away from him. “Sorry.”

Thanos opened his eyes again, surprised by the change. “What?”

She stammered. “You can... You can tell me if... I suck.” She bit her lower lip.

Thanos shook his head gently. He pushed the collar of her T-shirt to the side and placed open-mouthed kisses, on her shoulder. “You’re all...” He bit her skin. “...Except suck.” He took one of her hands in his, and placed it on his clothed crotch. “See?” She blushed and looked away, at the feel of his swollen member, but he forced her to look at him. “Look at the fucking effect you’re having on me.”

He was already hard, even though she’d barely touched him. She had fucking power over him, and she didn’t even know it.

“Did I do that?”

Thanos sneered. “Who else do you want it to be? Unless there’s a ghost in the shitter.” She laughed at his joke. “Yes, it’s you, and you alone.” He sucked her lower lip between his teeth and bit down, then released her. “You’re driving me fucking crazy!”

His words hit her like an electric shock. She had to stop questioning people’s words. If he told her she was beautiful and sexy, and that she drove him crazy, she just had to believe him. It wasn’t simple, but for her, right now, it was.

Much more confident, she took off her T-shirt. Thanos looked at her longingly and, without prompting, caressed her exposed skin with his hands and mouth. He sucked and licked the flesh, leaving marks in his path.

Thanos put his arms behind her back and unhooked her bra. He slipped the straps off her shoulders and let it fall between them. He bit his lip at the sight of her breast.

When he took one into his mouth, she gave a little squeal of surprise, but arched her back, pushing her breasts further into his face. She grabbed the back of his hair, and scratched his scalp with her short nails.

Thanos let out a grunt of satisfaction. He continued to worship her boobs, and caressed the other with his hand, rolling her nipple between his thumb and forefinger. Then he switched, giving the same attention to the second, until releasing it with an obscene pop.

He kissed her, then ran his hands down her back, gripping her ass. He played with the elastic of her jogging pants, running his fingertips underneath, to tease the edge of her panties. Then, without warning, he laid her on the tile floor and crawled between her legs.

In contact with the floor, she arched her back. “That’s cold.”

Thanos kissed her neck. “Yet...” He moved down to her sternum. “Your body...” Then, he traced the valley from her breasts to her navel with the tip of his tongue. “Is burning.” He finished with a final kiss just above the hem of her pants.

He grabbed the edge of the cloth and pulled it slowly down her legs until he tossed it behind him.

He saw her close her eyes, and clench her fists at her side. Thanos leaned over and placed a chaste kiss on her lips. “Look at me.” Although it wasn’t an order, she obeyed him. “You’re fucking perfect!”

He stepped back and straightened up. He grabbed one of her ankles and, as he had with the rest of her body, placed a gentle kiss on it. Then he moved up her soft skin, his lips leaving marks in the most sensitive places, his eyes never leaving hers.

When he kissed her inner thigh, her skin tingled under his touch. At the sight of her soaked panties, he smiled against her skin.

He moved up her body until he reached her lips once more. “Look at you, all wet for me already.” He slid his hand down to her damp panties.

She hiccupped, surprised by the sudden contact, but, as he began to slide his purple-painted middle finger up and down her wet slit, she let out a long moan. “Do you like it?” She nodded sharply. Thanos stopped teasing her. “I want to hear you.”

“Y... Yes. Please continue.”

Thanos teased her clit, adding more pressure with each movement, making her writhe beneath him. He nibbled her neck and could hear her panting and breathing hard.

He stopped caressing her, and knelt in front of him. He quickly removed her panties and licked his lips at the sight of her shiny folds.

He grabbed the back of her thighs, and bent down to lick her pussy. He saw her bite her lips, and clench her fists at her side, not knowing what to do with her hands. “Don’t forget, I want to hear you.”

He saw her hesitate, before she reopened her eyes and looked at him. At the sight of him, between her thighs, licking her folds, his eyes anchored in hers, she couldn’t hold back a moan of pleasure.

Satisfied, he began to devour her without inhibition. She grabbed his purple hair with one of her hands, and pushed his face against her, his nose pressing into her skin.

She let herself go completely, and held back no longer. Her moans filled the silent room.

“Su-Bong!” She begged.

Fuck! How could saying his real name, have such an effect on him? He was painfully hard, and horribly tight in his pants. But that would wait. For now, he wanted to make her cum a first time in his mouth.

As he continued to penetrate her with his tongue, Thanos stroked her clit with his thumb, making her hips twitch.

“Mm. Please.”

He raised his head. “Tell me what you want, princess.”

“I want...” He quickened his movements on her swollen bundle of nerves. “Ah! I want to come!”

He flashed her a toothy grin. “Yeah. That was the plan.”

Thanos stopped teasing her. He wanted to see her squirm with pleasure beneath him.

To prepare her, he slipped a finger inside her. She hissed at the intrusion and squirmed beneath him. “Relax, baby.”

He moved his finger, twisting it, to rub her walls. He felt her hand tighten in his hair, tugging at the strands.

He quickened his tongue movements, and quickly rubbed her sensitive clit with his palm. He inserted another finger and stretched it to caress her walls.

He felt her thighs shaking around his head, a sign that she was on the edge. He groaned against her folds, sending a shockwave through her body.

It was enough to make her come. She felt her whole body contract with a delight unknown pleasure. An electrifying heat ran through her innards. Her limbs trembled beyond her control. She felt her ecstasy grow again and again until it spilled into his mouth, with a scream of his name, her hands still clasped to him.

Thanos lapped up every last drop of her semen, before straightening up. His mouth and chin were covered with her juice. He licked his lips. “I knew you’d be delicious.”

He crawled on top of her again and kissed her fiercely, allowing her to taste herself on his tongue. She was surprised not to find it disgusting, but exciting.

As she kissed him, she fumbled with the hem of his tracksuit and tugged at it, but, given their position, she got nowhere.

“Su-Bong. Take it off.”

Thanos laughed against her mouth and stood up. He removed his pants, taking his boxers with him, and tossed them aside, along with the rest of their clothes.

At the sight of his big, red, leaky cock, she licked her lips and swallowed hard.

She straightened up, and knelt in front of him. Thanos looked at her, curious about her next move.

She raised her hand to touch him. She grasped him at the base, and slowly caressed him up and down.

Thanos inhaled through his nose. “Fuck!”

She let go. “I’m not sure what to do. Guide me, please.”

She wanted to kill him! She was so innocent, it was so exciting.

“You want to use your mouth?”

Her eyes widened, and her already rosy cheeks turned crimson. “Is that what you want?”

“I’d be a real idiot if I said no.” That earned him a laugh. “You don’t have to, sweetheart.” He couldn’t believe he was saying this.

“Hm... I want to.”

He took her chin between his fingers, and ran his thumb over her bottom lip, opening her mouth.

She leaned forward and, shyly, took his glans into her mouth. She advanced millimeter by millimeter to avoid choking.

Thanos stroked her cheek to reassure her. “Don’t use your teeth.”

When his cock finally touched the back of her throat, she held back a retch and pulled away quickly.

“Sorry. It’s... It’s big.”

“Yeah, thanks.” His smile was smug. “If you can’t take the whole thing, use your hand.”

“Okay.” She took him back into her mouth and began to suck him gently, all the while using her hand at the base, which followed the movement.

Thanos restrained himself from fucking her mouth. “Let your tongue caress my length.”

She nodded, and licked his vein. Thanos let his head bang against the wall behind him.

When she began to nod faster, taking him deeper, Thanos clutched her hair, and closed his eyes. He enjoyed the feel of her lips around him.

“That’s it, yeah. Like that.” He tugged at her hair, making her moan around him. “Fuck! Yeah!”

Feeling motivated by his encouragement, she grabbed his hips to hold him down, using only her mouth. When his tip touched the back of her throat for the second time, she felt tears welling up in her eyes. But she didn’t stop. She breathed deeply, to calm her nausea, then accelerated her head movements.

“Fuck!” He wiped a tear from her cheek. She sucked in her cheeks, drawing a bestial growl from him. “Damn! Look how fast you’re learning.” She played with his balls. “You have no idea how much I want to fill your innocent little mouth with my sperm.”

His words were driving her crazy. She was sure she could have another orgasm, just from his praise. It was so hot. He was so sexy.

She dug her nails into his skin and moaned around him. She pulled back and swirled her tongue around his glans, before taking him deep again with each movement of her head.

Thanos felt his balls tighten. He gripped her hair tighter to hold her in place. Then, with a guttural scream, he ejaculated into her mouth.

Although she was surprised, she swallowed as much as she could, while the rest dripped down her chin. She couldn’t define the taste or texture. It was... weird, but not disgusting.

When his breathing returned to normal, Thanos opened his eyes. The sight in front of him made him hard again.

She was still on her knees in front of him. Her cheeks were red, her lips swollen and her hair tousled. His cum was dripping down her chin. She looked like a fucking sex goddess.

Thanos fetched some paper towels. He returned to her, lifted her face and wiped her chin. “Are you okay?”

She nodded. “Yes, yes.” She stood up.

“Good, because I’m not done with you yet.” He flipped her over, so she was up against the wall, trapping her between his arms. “Jump.”

She tilted her head to the side. “Huh?”

Thanos let out a laugh. He looped her arms behind his neck, then lifted one of her legs and wrapped it around his hip. “Jump.”

“Oh.” She clung tightly to him and jumped into his arms. She could feel his cock brush against her.

Thanos carried her, as if she weighed nothing, to the sinks. He laid her gently on one of the ceramic basins, her limbs still wrapped around him.

“It’s not comfortable.”

“Exigeante?”

She lowered her head. “Sorry.”

He shrugged. He didn’t care where or how. He just wanted to fuck her. “As you wish, princess.” Thanos pulled her down from the sink. “It’s going to be complicated having comfort here.” He took her in his arms and kissed her. “But we’ll adapt.”

“Yes, we’ll adapt.”

He slid to the floor, against the wall, taking her with him. She found herself straddling his thighs. They were so close that his penis was wedged between their stomachs.

As he kissed her fiercely, he spread his semen over the tip of his glans. Then, he rubbed his cock along her slit, mixing their two fluids.

“Do you still want to?”

“Yes!” She almost screamed. She didn’t want any turning back. She wanted him, and only him, now.

“Good. You’ll have to ride me, beauty.”

She nodded and clung to his shoulders, using them as leverage. Then she slowly lowered herself down his length, inch by inch.

When she sat completely on top of him, his dick buried deep inside her, she hissed in pain.

Thanos stroked her hair. “It’s okay. Take your time.”

He felt so good in her warmth. He felt as if she were made for him, as if their two molds had been made together, to fit perfectly.

Her head buried in his neck, she took deep breaths to try and concentrate on something other than the pain. Then, she began to move gently up and down.

“You’re so tight.” Thanos didn’t want to hurt her, but she was moving too slowly for his liking. So he used his feet to meet her hips halfway, hitting her, faster, harder and deeper.

“Su-Bong!” She screamed. She bit her lower lip so hard that it bled.

“Go ahead, baby. Take my rhythm.”

As the pain faded, she accelerated her pelvic movements, bouncing on his cock again and again. “Ah! Ah!” The pain was completely eclipsed by intense pleasure. She couldn’t hold back her moans, much to Thanos’s delight.

“Yeah, that’s good. Don’t hold back.”

She moaned louder and louder, sending electric waves directly into his balls.

“I want them to know how good I make you feel.”

He kissed her breast and devoured her mouth. She dug her nails into his skin, leaving little red crescents in her wake.

“You take me so well, princess.” He bit her shoulder and neck, leaving hickey that would be visible for days.

“I’m going to... I’m going to cum.” She was so overwhelmed that tears ran down her cheeks.

Thanos kissed them away, tasting the salt on his tongue. “Come for me, sweetheart. Come on my dick.”

She didn’t need anything more. Her orgasm hit her for the second time that night. She came with a wrenching scream. She collapsed on top of him, her body trembling in his strong arms.

Feeling her clench around him, pouring her delicious brew over his penis, Thanos came in turn with a bestial growl, his semen filling her. He let his body and head leaned against the wall, his arms still wrapped around her.

They remained in this position for several minutes, in silence. Their sweaty bodies moved up and down to the rhythm of their heavy breathing, while the beating of their hearts echoed in their ears.

Feeling that her body was no longer jelly, she gently straightened up. Thanos pushed back the strands of hair stuck to her forehead and kissed her.

“That was... incredible!”

“Did you doubt it?” He pouted slightly, offended that she’d doubted his sexual abilities.

“No! But...” He raised an eyebrow. “It had nothing to do with you, but with me.”

“Hm.” He stroked her now, cold back. “You were... Fucking perfect!”

She flashed him a beaming smile. “Really?”

“Yeah.” She kissed him tenderly. “Your pussy was made for my dick, baby.”

Her cheeks turned red again. “Su-Bong!” She slapped him on the chest and hid her face in the hollow of his shoulder.

“What? Oh, you’re embarrassed despite what we just did?”

“Yes.” She mumbled.

He chuckled and gently shook his head. She was adorable. Fucking sexy and adorable! The perfect combo.

Thanos placed little kisses on her shoulder, then lifted her head and kissed her as tenderly as she’d done before.

“I don’t want to ruin the moment, but we need to get back.”

She let out a soul-splitting sigh. “Okay.”

“If it were up to me, we’d stay here forever, but those bastards in pink are going to come after us by the scruff of the neck if we don’t get out of here.”

“Hm, too bad.” She kissed him one last time before rising to her feet.

She was almost ashamed to feel an emptiness, as she withdrew from him.

Thanos rose to his feet. He got some toilet paper, moistened it, and handed it to her to clean up.

She took the wet toilet paper, gathered up her clothes, and ran to hide in one of the box to clean herself up and get dressed.

Thanos laughed out loud at her newfound modesty. He cleaned himself up, then put his clothes back on.

Just before opening the door leading to the corridor, Thanos asked her. “Are you ready?”

She shrugged. “I don’t really have a choice.”

He placed a kiss on her hair and put an arm around her waist.

When they emerged from the bathroom, they were surprised to see no guards. Neither in front of the toilet doors nor those of the corridor leading to the dormitory.

They moved cautiously along the multicolored walls. The closer they got, the more agitation they heard coming from the dormitory.

Thanos tried to look through the porthole to see anything, but the angle of vision was too restricted. He gently opened the door.

They took a few steps into the room, but stopped dead in their tracks.

“Holy shit!”

She buried her face in his jacket, unable to face the scene.

It was carnage. There were dozens of players, lying lifeless on the floor. And those who remained were covered in the blood of their victims. It was monstrous. How could they have reached such a rage? To the point of slaughtering each other with sharp objects.

They watched in fear as the guards in pink uniforms picked up the bodies and placed them in black cardboard coffins.

When the guards had finished cleaning up, they returned to their posts as if nothing had happened.

She clung to Thanos as if for dear life. She couldn’t stay there any longer. Not with these monsters.

“50.” She said in a tiny voice.

Thanos turned his head. “Hm?”

“There’s only fifty of us left.” She’d counted the “survivors”, if she could call them that. “What are we going to do? We can’t wait until tomorrow for another vote. Do they still have their forks? We’re going to...”

Thanos took her face in his hands and wiped away her tears. “Hey. Hey. It’s okay.” She sniffed. He took her in his arms and stroked her back, comforting her. “It’s gonna be all right. I won’t let anything happen to you, okay?”

She nodded and clutched his shirt with her fists. They were so tight between the fibers of the fabric that her knuckles were white.

“Can I sleep with you tonight?”

“You don’t even have to ask.”

They headed for her bed. She felt safer sleeping on the side of the crosses.

They lay on the bed, their limbs entangled. Her head rested on his rib cage. She hoped the gentle beat of his heart would help her fall asleep, but it was hopeless. She couldn’t sleep a wink all night. She was too afraid someone would attack them while they slept.

“Su-Bong?”

“Hm?”

“Nothing. I just wanted to know if you were asleep.”

“I can’t.” He heaved a deep sigh.

“Neither can I.” She snuggled even closer to him, burying her nose in his chest.

Thanos played with a lock of her hair, wrapping it around his finger. “Try it. I’ll protect you, I promise.”

She lifted her head to look at him and, despite the darkness, she saw his worried eyes. “I know you will. But you, who’ll protect you?”

He felt like taking her back to the bathroom and fucking her from behind, against one of those fucking sinks, his eyes anchored in hers through the mirror.

“What did I tell you about being too nice, huh?” He tapped her nose, which wrinkled adorably.

“Hm, but it’s you. I can be with you.”

Precisely, it was with someone like him that she shouldn’t be. He shook his head gently to chase away his thoughts. She was an adult, responsible for her choices. If she wanted to see the best of him, he’d be a fool not to let her.

“Sleep.” He wasn’t going to fight her over this, that would be ridiculous.

She mumbled in response and rested her head on him. She closed her eyes and let her mind wander to something happier. She let herself be encircled by his strong, protective arms, relaxing under his fingers that caressed her hair, and rocking to the tempo of his heartbeat. She sank slowly into a deep sleep.

~~~~~

She awoke suddenly at the sound of the trumpet, alerting Thanos, who straightened up, on the lookout for any sign of danger.

“What?”

“It’s nothing. Sorry, the music startled me.” She yawned until her jaw dropped, then stretched.

Thanos lay back down, taking her with him. He nestled his nose in the hollow of her neck, his arms wrapped around her.

“Did you sleep well?”

“Thanks to you, yes.” She lowered her head and kissed him. “And you?”

He mumbled against her shoulder. “Like a fucking newborn.” She shook her head with a smile and stroked his hair.

When the armed guards entered the dormitory, they jumped to their feet. They walked to the middle of the room, hand in hand.

She had counted correctly. There had indeed been fifty deaths. So there were now only fifty. However, she had no idea who remained in each group.

The total prize was 40.6 billion won, and about 812 million won per player.

She did a quick mental calculation and sighed with relief. Adding up their two amounts, they had a total of 1.62 billion won.

Not only would they be able to pay off their two debts of 1.24 billion won, but they’d have 384 million won left over to get back on their feet.

She hadn’t even thought for a second before deciding to give the rest of her money to Thanos. She didn’t need all those millions.

She didn’t have time to share this good news with Thanos. They were separated by this dividing line for the start of the vote. She hoped it would be the last.

~~~~~

Thanos’s eyes were fixed on the scores. It had never been so close. Every time someone voted one, the next player voted for the other.

The crosses were determined to leave, but the circles were enraged to stay.

When it was his turn to press one of the buzzers, he was less enthusiastic than the other times. Firstly, because he hadn’t taken one of his pills. So he was perfectly lucid.

Then there was what had happened in the bathroom with his player 240. And the fact that she’d almost died because of that other asshole Nam-Su.

He’d been through a lot, and his last period was the darkest. He knew he’d never be able to forgive himself if he voted to stay and she died. This time, nothing, and no one could stop him from jumping.

To be honest, he was getting tired. Both physically and mentally.

When he reached the blue and red mushrooms, he paused for a moment, then, he raised his hand above the cross button, but moved it to the round button instead.

The amount collected wasn’t enough to repay his debt. He was just under 500 million won short, so he could wipe the slate clean and start afresh.

All his thoughts jumbled together, creating a deafening hubbub in his head.

He slowly lowered his hand to press down. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, calming his mind.

He opened his eyes again. He had made his decision. Firmly, he hit the buzzer, which lit up, plunging the room into stunned silence.

Thanos proudly took the little red rectangle with the white cross and clipped it to his jacket.

For once, he had decided to listen to his heart.

~~~~~

She could hardly contain her tears when she saw the number of crosses increase by one.

He’d done it. Thanos had changed his vote.

She didn’t let him get to her. She ran to him, threw herself into his arms, and kissed his face.

“Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!”

Thanos laughed and twirled her around. “You said you wanted to see me outside again, so...”

She nodded briskly and kissed him passionately, under the amused looks of the other crosses, but disgusted and inflamed glances of the rounds.

Thanos put her down again. They moved together, their hands entwined, to the red side of the line.

With invisible tension resting on their shoulders, they watched the result on the screen, which changed as the votes were cast.

Only three people remained, and the score was in favor of the crosses with 24 votes against 23 for the circles.

One of the players had a blue scratch card attached to his jacket, while the other two had a red one.

If no one changed their minds, they could walk out of here alive, and with a nice sum of money in their bank accounts.

The first of the three to start was one of their own. They watched him walk up to the buzzer and press the red button without hesitation.

“Yes!” She squeezed his hand tighter, and leaned even closer to him.

They had no hope for the second, since he was the 101 old player, who kept barking. Moreover, he was the one with the biggest debt, at over 10 billion won.

Unsurprisingly, the blue mushroom was activated.

Thanos leaned over and kissed the top of her head. “It’s all right. There’s still player 1.”

It was time for the last player, number one, to come forward and vote. Sure, he was on their side, but, in the first vote, he’d voted blue.

They weren’t sure of anything. Everything could happen. If he voted red, it would finally be over. However, if he voted blue, there would be another tie, pushing the deadline to the next day.

All the remaining players watched him slowly advanced. A lump lodged in the throat of the reds, while a glimmer of hope shone in the eyes of the blues.

He seemed to hesitate for a few moments before the horrible buzzer sounded.

They all looked up to see the final score.

Crosses : 26 ; Rounds : 24.

It was over. They could finally escape this nightmare.

She turned to Thanos to celebrate with a kiss, but white smoke suddenly flooded the room.

Within seconds, she collapsed to the floor. The last thing she saw before sinking into unconsciousness was Thanos’s face, right next to hers, looking down at her. He was smiling at her, but she could see the fear in his eyes. Probably the same as hers.

~~~~~

You can read it on AO3 here

[dandiacal]

i finished gideon the ninth in january and now i spend six hours a week listening to harrow the ninth while working in the library jacketing books ✅✅✅

i got the most wonderful picture distilled into my mind of harrow and ianthe in that frilly boudoir place of ianthes. and i was just blown away. what a pleasure. what paradise is my life that i get to hear about this. theyre arguably BOTH evil, theyre opposing forms of glamour, theyre gross, they INVENTED the concept of attraction in repulsion, and meanwhile theres profligate amounts of textiles everywhere and oil paintings on the wall and ianthe is wearing a nightgown so complicated and fancy it is completely unflattering.... I WAS BORN TO HEAR IT!!!!

let it be known, also, that in the most fascinating twist of fate ianthe shares many physical traits and also her sanguinary and disgusting turn of mind with my intimate friend. i look like harrow, am often paranoid, decently sadistic, and by all accounts have a lovely somber aura (my friend told me i remind her of the historical women wailing for their children who died of the plague, except "i like it" [did she mean children dying of the plague? mourning? or the overall lugubrious tang of that little scene?}}) . anyway both of us are very nice people and completely original so the resemblance can only go so far but im struck! i didnt ever IMAGINE two people who look like that had been written drawn or pictured together even. yet here we are, and there they are!

it is so sad how harrow is being stripped of her grandeur on this stupid ship. give her back her sweeping robes now!!!!!!! for her much lamented SANITYs sake!!!!!! and her PAINT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

when ianthe says and i paraphrase: yes theres more soup. i made it, its vile. it really encapsulates everyhting there is to know in the world

i'm a little less than half-finished but so i suppose there's time to develop this, but i'm confused about what it does for the story for john to be so banal. it reminds me of the may i call it cliche of people getting to heaven and its just cubicles. once upon a time this was subversive, but now weve seen it 10000 times and it ISNT anymore so one must ask "whats its narrative significance ?' there's a little bit of harrow examining her preconceptions of God vs the real man and incidents like her being shaken by ianthe "blaspheming,"" but for someone who is quite opinionated and whose whole life revolves around religious devotion i would expect much to be made of a revolt between the somber respect and grand awfulness she is so careful to do religion with (and relishes!) and the tired everyman aspect of the real guy. obviously most of her devotion was going to the tomb, not God, but still! maybe its coming. or maybe theres some thematic richness in there i cant see

[briarlovesclara]

Wicked & The Hunger Games: an analysis on "evil"

I have been thinking (listening to the Wicked OBS, watching copious movie interviews, and always thinking about THG), and I think between the two medias you can draw a fairly comprehensive line in terms of how characters develop into evil within stories. Spoilers for THG and Wicked (both acts and the first movie) ahead :)

I'll be breaking this down to 5 different ways characters grow to interact and sometimes embrace evil. Starting with:

Not born evil, actively resists and struggles throughout the narrative, and ultimately remains not evil:

My character for this trope is Katniss Everdeen. This is not a character that is expected to be evil, or was born into a role of being so. Though Katniss struggles to "remember who the enemy is", her fumbles are often ultimately due to a misguided or manipulated outlook. She's put in a horrible situation, and has to do horrible things, but you see a progression with how she views them. She kills Marvel without thinking, knows she had to, and would do it again-- but she's haunted by it. She has no reason to take pity on Cato, but she does. (I know technically she was also trying to get help for Peeta, but she also understands the horror of Cato's death.) Even when this falters, she realizes it and hates it immediately (see: the death of the capitol woman in her own house). She makes active choices out of care, and once it is a viable route, she does what she does for the greater good.

Not born evil, actively resists and struggles through the narrative, and eventually excepts evil:

This is Elphaba. She isn't born with any evil in her, and tries over and over to not become so. Eventually, she's worn down by the narrative ("No Good Deed") and fits into the role she was pressured to have her whole life. This is not to say that she ever truly becomes evil, but that she plays the role for the "audience" (Oz).

Not born evil, but gets led into it; is either unaware or comfortable of their morals by the end:

When asked what really helped him define his character in the movie, Jeff Goldblum responded that he and director Jon M. Chu worked to find the finnicky nature of someone who let banality lead them into evil. The Wizard is a neutral character when he arrives in Oz; he becomes evil by accepting small amounts of power and corruption until he's already there ("believe me, it's hard to resist" --"Wonderful").

Not born evil, passively struggles throughout the narrative, and ultimately chooses to be evil:

Coriolanus Snow fits this like a glove. The point of his narrative is that he must start out at the same point as the first character (Katniss) and be born with opportunity. The shift is that he only internally and weakly struggles against the temptations of power. He starts making choices that he convinces himself are not evil, but his reasoning is 'it can't be evil if it's just me getting what I want'. He ends up blatantly choosing to do evil things to continue in comfort and power.

Born evil, does nothing to resist this, dies evil:

The Wicked Witch of the West-- which is to say that this character doesn't exist alone. You'll see that the main difference is that this character is born evil. The Witch (Elphaba) is not: the whole thesis of the musical. This character exists only in the mind of propaganda, a demon meant to haunt you, an individual (or organization) with no nuance behind any evil acts. If you see this kind of character applied in the real world, be wary of who you are letting tell you stories and what their motivations may be.

[crooked-wasteland]

Hazbin Rewrite Ideas

Since I have gotten about 3 asks now on how I would rewrite Hazbin Hotel, here are some actual ideas for a rewrite and why I think they would function as a cohesive narrative and not just metanarrative themes.

Adam is Second in Command

Adam being both the head of the exorcists as well as Sera being a terrible overseer and uninterested in what Adam is doing makes no sense. Even with the argument being that she's concerned about Hell rising up, it doesn't explain why she wouldn't take more control of the exorcists. She basically allows them to govern themselves and relies heavily on Adam of all people. In Season 2 they are trying to make her morally grey with how she comes to regret the exterminations after Pentious is proven capable of redemption, but it is undercut by how she treated Sinners as subhuman.

If they are in heaven, they deserve to be a person and if they go to Hell they don't. But it solidifies this idea that people need to prove they are worthy of respect, love, and life. Which is the fundamental core of White Supremacist ideology. Most racists have exceptions to their dogma, because those individuals "proved themselves" in some way or manner that they are deserving of respect. Usually by being useful or successful.

This framing is not removed just because Sera is black coded. Racist ideology is racist ideology regardless of what color it comes in. And even if you love the show, it is paramount to understand that the people behind the series are going to have their own beliefs and agendas that are still going to be filtered through Medrano's beliefs. And even if this is the result of a hired writer or not, it didn't touch Medrano that this sort of thinking is the definition of implicit racism.

As such, adding distance between Sera and Adam would have made it less scathing on her and show more of the bureaucratic "red tape" that I think was supposed to be somewhere in Heaven. Based on the first and sixth episodes, I feel like that was what they were trying to get across with Peter's panic over Charlie "not on the list" as well as her signing a contract just to meet with Adam. But it is so glossed over it may as well not be there at all.

And while I definitely do criticize Medrano when adding more characters to a cast, it usually comes from the fact that the additions do nothing to balance the cast and the story. Often adding new plot threads rather than integrating into existing ones. But here it is necessary. Add another Angel to be in charge of exterminators and Adam, who also reports back to Sera. Someone who is not objectively bloodthirsty, they are just doing their job (The Banality of Evil is a great reference). Meanwhile Sera is the one actually in control, but doesn't actually want to get too involved with the details because she finds the human impact of her decisions too upsetting.

She takes in numbers and facts without wanting to really know anything. So when Charlie goes to meet with Heaven, it should be Adam and his boss. Adam being insufferable and contrarian while his boss is apathetic and diplomatic would have made a better dynamic than having Adam and Adam2.0 (Lute). Having differences in personalities allows for more range of interactions.

Or, if you want to be more radical and clean up some of the fluff to the story, recycle a character into this role. Emily being Adam's superior actually sets a strong foundation for why they would even entertain and compromise.

I wouldn't have had this happen in the first episode either. Instead have it be episode 4 or 5 and keep everything in Hell, just have the interaction occur through the embassy.

And that isn't to say get rid of Lute. In fact, making her the second in command to the second in command is a perfect representation of Pick-Me Post-Feminism.

Rework the Timeline and Primary Threat

The 6 month timeline was a bad idea. It's clear they thought they had enough content to have an extermination at the end of the season, but no idea how to adapt to episode constraints. It makes no sense why the timeline is condensed to 6 months when we don't even see things happening in the show. Changes are practically instantaneous after a song and such songs are not a genuine show or reflection of the characters' wants and needs. It's a moment that "seems good for a song".

It also never confirms why they are reducing the time.

I actually like the Conan idea Anon supplied. Where the reveal of the dead Angel is what causes the growing tension. I would probably have cut the first 3 episodes to focus on one character each, similar to Creature Commandos did towards the end of the series.

For some reference, the show starts with the characters playing off each other and building their dynamics before going into their back stories. And the last 4 episodes, while balancing the current stories of the entire cast, tackle each monster's backstory one by one. They start with a sense of familiarity, so it makes sense to hold off on explaining their pasts until the story starts building tension. Interspersing it with the rising action towards the climax allows the audience to attach themselves to the characters in a complex manner. They aren't made one note for some tragic backstory to them excuse all the lives they take later on. You see them grapple with and indulge in their darkest self while also seeing where their humanity has been buried at the same time. You delight in their gratuitous violence and the carnage they leave while also wishing them happiness. Extremely contradictory emotions being balanced simultaneously is how you can quickly endear an audience to a group of sympathetic assholes. And James Gunn is one of the best writers for that trope.

So for the first few episodes I would focus on the characters' relationships with each other. Angel Dust not really participating, Vaggie being defensive of Charlie while also seeing Angel Dust as a lost cause, and Charlie desperately trying to instill change but not understanding Angel or Vaggie well enough because she is essentially a Hellborne Half-angel. Having her struggling to connect to sinners would have been an excellent source of narrative conflict early on.

It works with the B plot of episode 1 and connects better to the Pilot. Additionally, it builds a foundation for Lilith's motivations. Apparently in season 2 it is revealed she raised an army before vanishing, so focusing on Sinners rejecting Charlie during this time makes the most sense. It even allows some fanatics to accuse Charlie of being a traitor to even her own Mother. There is also an opportunity to bait at the idea of Charlie not being Lilith's daughter, but actually Eve's.

Keeping with the angel being killed in the extermination, have a rising tension be that exterminators have supposedly been spotted in the Pride Ring. Maybe they are searching for the missing angel and that is causing rising uncertainty and thus paranoia and desperation. It also can act as motivation for Sinners to go to Charlie. And Charlie sees this "threat of punishment" moving people to believe in her. What it means to rule through fear and how desperation creates Christ figures.

The exterminators find the dead Angel and are planning a preemptive mass scale invasion. No longer are they just thinking numbers, this is now war. And have the meeting between Heaven and Charlie be based on that. Heaven is meeting with Lucifer to basically say all bets are off and, if he wants to keep his family safe, they need to leave the Pride Ring before a specific time.

It shows that international hostilities are never so complete that the wealthy and powerful still look after each other. Even when they are supposedly enemies. It shows the nuance and complexities of class solidarity and diplomacy. It gives the foundations of how power becomes corrupt and how community and recognition supercedes even ideology.

And this is where Charlie meets with Adam and his commander and she has to make a deal. She can't call off another extermination, it is happening whether she likes it or not. But what if the only safe place is the Hotel? She explains her little rehab center and how she is trying to find a better way to reduce tension between Hell and Heaven by redeeming her people. Adam is opposed emotionally, talking about how undeserving they are and how their punishment has already been given, only to be silenced by his diplomatic superior.

The issue then is how many people would be sincere in their redemption if it was known that running to the hotel would make them safe? Every room would be packed to bursting as every sinner ran to save themselves and immediately abandon Charlie and her project once it was no longer convenient to them. Especially because they don't know how their exterminator was killed.

If Charlie wishes to spare her pet project, she needs to give them a good reason not to just go to war. Things will go back to normal, yearly exterminations included, but the deal with Lucifer would be amended to include Charlie's hotel as being safe only if she can find the murderer and bring them before Heaven for their final judgement.

Connect this storyline to the Vs. Carmella works under Vox but keeps her angelic weapon to herself because it's the only thing that can kill a Sinner. Maybe she is planning to kill the Vs herself because they keep control of her through her daughters. Maybe Valentino had them abducted to empower Vox over Carmella and take her territory. They are Val's victims in human trafficking and political plays, but during the extermination, Carmella took advantage of the situation and stole them back. Knowing that it would be assumed the people in charge of watching over her girls were killed by the angels and no one would necessarily look for her girls for the same reason.

Only for them to be attacked by an exorcist while fleeing and Carmella was forced to kill the angel to save them all. And because of that, she's trying to lay low and stay quiet during this whole situation to not raise suspicion that she has her daughters, or that it was her who killed the angel. Meanwhile Charlie is hunting her down to try and save her hotel. And this way Angel Dust's narrative with Valentino directly folds into the conflict where he can be a tool for Charlie and the narrative to get information on Carmella and solve the case.

There are multiple opportunities one could take with these ideas and not all of them are necessary to greenlight. If you don't want to suggest Eve could be Charlie's real mother, you don't have to. But if you enjoy playing with your audience and have an idea of how the reveal one way or the other would go, it's an opportunity. And the fact remains that you sometimes have to cut ideas.

Maybe not all of these ideas would work. But the Hell I imagine isn’t just sex and bowties—it’s systems, trauma, survival, and the hope of something more.

[coraniaid]

Actually, on reflection, I think I'm persuaded that the "poor Willow is a magical junkie now and it's not her fault :(" subplot in Season 6 is, contrary to what I've said before, actually the worst multi-episode subplot on Buffy.

Say what you like about the other two contenders for that honor: the non-mystery of "is Giles really the First Evil and why hasn't anyone thought to check yet?" or the banality of "shall we engage seriously with the fact Spike has a soul now and how that might change him as a person, or shall we just say that a mean ghost hypnotized him?". But neither of those plots involve a woman telling her significant other (and I am really not paraphrasing much at all here) "I don't like that you used magic to violate my mind and rob me of my ability to consent to our relationship, because it's not good for you".

Moreover:

While the two Season 7 subplots are both pretty bad and boring to watch and are certainly part of why I don't enjoy that season, I don't think removing or somehow rewriting either of them would automatically make the season much better. By contrast, the Willow subplot of Season 6 is the worst thing about that season -- one which I think otherwise had a lot of potential and is arguably the most ambitious season the show ever did -- and fixing it would improve the season as a whole a lot.

The Willow subplot also takes up a lot more of the show overall than the two Season 7 subplots do. Giles as the First is a complete waste of everyone's time, but it's also fully resolved in less than half a dozen episodes (we first get the fake out that Giles might be dead in Never Leave Me, the ninth episode of the season, and we see that he isn't in The Killer In Me, the thirteenth episode). The Spike hypnotic trigger lasts a lot longer, but it still over within about half a season. But the Willow subplot dominates most of Season 6 and also continues to have ramifications for WIllow's character development (or lack thereof) for the rest of the show.

It's easy, I think, to understand why the writers resorted to the two Season 7 plots. They needed some excuse for Buffy's friends to not trust Spike, but for various reasons are committed to the idea that having a soul means Spike himself is now inherently Good and Blameless and so the reasons not to trust him can't be related to anything he's ever chosen to do himself, it has to be something done to him against his will. And the writers obviously stopped caring about Giles as a character with any sort of inner life the very minute ASH asked to be partially written out of the show so he could move back to England. I honestly don't believe the writers were capable of writing good subplots for either Giles or Spike by this point, even if they'd tried. But the Willow subplot comes out of nowhere and completely derails what was going to be a really interesting story line about Willow that the show had been patiently building towards since at least Season 3 and arguably even longer.

More broadly, both the Season 7 plots are bad in part because they are attempts to make the First -- previously a forgettable monster of the week whose primary powers included 'making people who have done bad things feel suitably bad' and 'not being able to touch anything'; a plot device which Buffy herself already rightly dismissed as all talk all the way back in Season 3 ("I get it. You're evil. Do we have to chat about it all day?"). Of course they're not successful attempts: there's no way to make the First as menacing and important as the writers wish it was. Being annoyed at the way they fail almost seems like missing the point.

Most importantly, I can more cheerfully ignore the two Season 7 subplots because I don't really care about either Spike or Giles at this point of the show's run. But I like Willow, so it bothers me more that she's subjected to all this dreadfully bad writing and that her character never really quite recovers from it.

[cpericardium]

So! I've gotten a host of messages and asks regarding recent disk horse and I wanted to address them as a collective.

I know I have anon asks off, I won't share your URLs, but I do want to thank you for asking and clarifying some of the frankly vile things people have been saying about me, my girlfriend, and friends. I value those of you who offered your words of support, and didn't jump to believe screenshots taken out of context and lies written with the utmost confidence and none of the facts. I am a little tired of having my morals questioned and my views conflated with every single person I associate with, but there it goes.

tumblr user cpericardium suspiciously silent on the subject of Gaza: does this mean you support ethnic cleansing???

My reticence when it comes to posting about topics like I/P is because:

-This is a fandom blog intended for lighter topics, except maybe the occasional vent about life stuff, which I usually hide under a cut. I don't have sideblogs. They seem tough to maintain and I don't post nearly enough to justify it. If I were to make one it would be for another fandom or maybe just the freakier bugs. I simply prefer my social media experience to be stress-free.

-Anti-slacktivism. It's a documented thing: posting about an issue makes you feel like you're doing something, you get that little shot of dopamine, so you don't actually go out and do something that effects meaningful change. I'm trying to do less of that. I'm good with the friends and people I follow who choose to post about it and this is a strictly personal belief, but when I engage in activism, it is offline or it is a donation. You're not going to hear about it.

But don't you reblog lgbt and women's rights posts?

Yeah, and that's usually when I want to save a post for one reason or another (e.g. to talk about with someone on discord later). The bottom line is that the main purpose of my blog is not to post political takes or to spread awareness of anything. It is just a collection of my interests (fan stuff, bugs) and hopefully a way to share those interests with like-minded people.

I will state my views clearly for the record: I support Palestine. The ongoing genocide is heartbreaking and so is the violence against protestors. Additionally, I am against antisemitism and the harassment of Jewish people in the name of supporting Palestine. This shouldn't even need to be said.

Is your girlfriend a Zionist?

No.

Does she support Zionists?

No.

Wasn't she in the military?

Yes, years ago.

But the military is evil?

It is. She's extremely hardcore anti-war and anti-military, does not believe the US should even have an army, and actively PMs strangers on reddit to try to convince them to not make the same mistake. If they're dead set anyway, she gives them detailed advice on how to survive. Because she actually cares about the human cost of war, not the social clout gained from shunning or sneering at people who make wrongheaded choices. I have seen her doing this, seen her seeking to understand their reasons for joining so she can systematically explain—from personal experience!—why they're not going to get any of that out of the army. It is a hell of a lot more effective than bitching them out or writing callout posts or starting whisper campaigns about them. She cannot delete those years of her life no matter how much she regrets them. There is only forward. I think we can all agree on that.

But what about all those things she said. "I regret nothing, I have no qualms, VA nipple money etc."

Well you have to understand that while of generally upright character, she is a bit of a scamp. She believes she fundamentally should not have to explain herself to randos who do not know her, who have never, not once, interacted with her, who are clearly digging for dirt and will twist anything she says no matter how banal. People see what they want to see and they look for evidence to reinforce their preconceptions; they'll go so far as to make alts to join servers, cherry-pick screencaps, crop them, and conveniently fill in the rest of the narrative for curious onlookers. So she decided to exaggerate and amplify and twirl her mustache like a supervillain. Give them a show, as it were.

To be clear, I'm not sold on this strat because it makes her look cartoonishly evil to people who can't understand sarcasm and hyperbole. But her friends and I are aware of her actual beliefs from actually talking with her for more than one (1) second instead of immediately believing two mysteriously cropped screencaps from a thirdhand source, and also aware that she did not in fact do those things people imagine she did. And isn't that what matters? Real-life harm? Do you even care?

Re: screenshots/so-called proof from shakertwelve & lakesbian's "callouts"

Girlfriend addresses them here. I will also note they have spread lies about me and other people before.

[josy-woodhouse]

Okay I have to say it.

Will, Ada and Montresor did something way worse than Annabel Lee.

Why? Because motive matters. Now don't get me wrong, a good motive cannot justify an inherently evil action, it however matters more and more when going deeper into more morally grey areas.

Annabel has made it very clear she understands these people, including Duke to be damned regardless of her actions and basically sees herself confronted with a trolley problem that goes: "You, your wife and like X other people are bound to rails. A trolly will run over all but one of you. However if you pull just the right levers, both you end your wife will survive. The first lever you must pull is on Duke." While this doesn't make her actions noble, it gives them a noble cause and one could argue in several ways that she's acting within a moral grey area if we take the situation to be as unshakable as it seems. To make to examples, one could argue in an utalitarian way (this saves more lives than the other option) or in a very human way (this saves a loved one at the cost of a soon to be dead man, who could blame her?). There are also concepts of morality that would condemn her, like for example the categoric imperative or Jewish or Christian (and I think Muslim) religion, in which it is inherently bad to kill a single person even to safe thousands of others.

Annabel considers killing Duke a necessary evil.

Montresor however is acting out of pure sadism and spite and he puts on quite a show to make this clear. He had done so even if he believed everyone would get a happy end and he is having the time of his life killing Duke. That is picture book chaotic evil behaviour right there and by no means redeemable.

Will and Ada? Arguably worse than Montresor, at least not a bit better. This is the kind of stuff that makes large scale modern genocides possible. Hannah Ahrendt (great woman, you should look her up) argues in her book "Eichmann in Jerusalem: A Report on the Banality of Evil" that evil at its worst is not some kind of demonic evil like it has been preached in medieval times, but lays within the sheer banality of an office worker casually doing the phone calls and paper work necessary to send thousands to their certain death, while the office worker goes back home, eats dinner with his family and thinks "I'm just doing my job. It's my supervisors moral responsibility, not mine."

Ada and Will tried to kill for no other reason than because they have been told to do so and the lack of willingness to accept responsibility really shows in their actions afterwards. So I am a bit confused when I see people arguing how terrible Annabel Lee is while defending the "poor boy Will".

So, controversial opinion: in this very specific case, even though Annabel Lee either started this or at the very least didn't stop it when she clearly could have, she hasn't committed anything as immoral as her henchmen committed, who did not even need a motive to kill.

Also I would every day prefer an Annabel Lee willing to kill Duke to safe her wife in the long run over an Annabel Lee that prefers to not be a controversial female character. Let's not forget these people don't actually exist.

[darklinaforever]

Jesus Christ, as much as I'm not against people supporting and shipping Ellen x Orlok, you people have got to pull in the reins when it comes to shitting on Thomas. Constantly throwing in his face how he couldn't understand Ellen for who she really was and her powers blahblahblah, throwing on top of it all how he failed to provide both as a husband and a friend and last but not least, ultimately failing to kill Orlok as he intended to. Who's to say those things are even his failings, even if he did say that he will provide for Ellen and tried to be a doting husband, friend etc? Who can claim to have reacted better in his place when faced with A LITERAL MAGICAL DARK UNDEAD BEING, the literal personification of death itself?!! Is there a manual on how to handle your possessed wife that I apparently didn't read, please do send me the link to it?! And also you people WILL NEVER BE ABLE to know for sure how Ellen's and Thomas' relationship would've worked out if someone managed to kill Orlok before he and Ellen got together again, and Ellen and Thomas actually communicated properly, because there is no alternative to this movie!! So whatever you claim about their relationship proves to be just specalution in the end, just like everybody else. What sane man would've let his wife easily into the arms to rotting undead death machine corpse, without trying to kill it and save his wife, whether that wife is a supernatural being herself or not?? Have we forgotten how difficult it is in fantasy stories for a person who discovers they have powers to convince people around them that they do, if they can't actually show them their powers?? Who would believe such a thing, no matter how much you love that person?? Also, for all of you blaming all of that shit on Thomas.. Ellen also failed as a friend, she let a monster inside the Hardings' house and kill her beloved friend Anna and the children and consequentially Friedrich. She also broke Thomas' heart by not only choosing Orlok but dying beside him. And I'm not trying to paint her as the villain but if you're going to play dirty with Thomas then so will I with Ellen. In the end, you people can imagine Ellen bouncing on Orlok crazy style you can imagine yourselves bouncing on it crazy style for all I care, you can imagine them as some sort of vigilante heroes who are fighting against the poor little evil victorian society... but start using your god damn brain when imagining on how to deal with supernatural forces... when they are in fact supernatural??!!

You're honestly getting angry for nothing.

I never theorized about the future of Thomas & Ellen if they had stayed together already.

Then, it's Robert Eggers' words, not mine, that Thomas doesn't understand Ellen even though he loves her and he dismisses her for that.

So be mad at him.

We're just repeating what the creator of the film said because we see it in the film.

Second, Thomas was made to fail, simply because he was a tragic hero.

It's... just facts ?

Also, I'm tired of your excuse of trying to rationalize the fact that people don't understand Ellen's powers and that we should put ourselves in their shoes and that we won't react better, and so we can't critical them, because that doesn't not what the film is about.

The fact that the people around Ellen do not understand her power is meant to be seen as negative (and criticize) because it is the result of Victorian society of which they are the instruments.

Victorian society which is the real villain of this film.

I don't care how I or anyone else in real life reacts because that's not what this movie is about.

When you watch this movie, you're supposed to think about the meaning /symbolism of things. Not see it literally, at least not only.

Damn, we're not in a banal fantasy story where it's complicated for characters to accept that the hero or heroine has magical gifts ?! You are in a huge off-topic simply to try to further justify the actions of the characters towards Ellen and prevent them from being criticized. The context is not the same here as a more classic fantasy story once again. The comparison is ridiculous !

And then, I don't see why I would be upset with you for "playing dirty with Ellen", when I literally made posts talking about her parallel with Orlok, that Ellen is Orlok and Orlok is Ellen, that she is just as much Nosferatu than him, therefore a form of monster. I have also literally already reblogged posts or said myself that Ellen let Orlok into the Harding house signing their death. And @apoloadonisandnarcissus explained very well why Ellen can be considered as a villain. Do you think you're doing something to me by throwing things at me that I already know and have already talked about ?

And at what fucking point did I blame Thomas for what happens in the movie ? No one ever said he was the bad guy either ?The only thing I really say about him is that he's a bad husband. Which is... true (for so many reasons) ?

Visibly you are not a regular on my tumblr and have absolutely nothing to do with what I post about this film.

Also, am I supposed to take you seriously with your comment about how I can imagine bouncing on Orlok ? You are disturbed my word.

Oh, and you obviously aren't capable of interacting properly with fictional stories / fiction to have such a childish reaction.

[sage-nebula]

This is probably me reading too much into things, and I really hope I am, but . . . part of me wonders if Toby . . . feels embarrassed, a little, of Undertale.

Again, I think this is probably me just reading way too much into things. But in Deltarune's fourth chapter, you can play various songs on a giant organ in the dark world. For most of the themes that originated in Undertale, the commentary is positive; Ralsei likes both "His Theme (Memory)" and "Your Best Friend", and Susie likes "Spear of Justice" and "Heartache."

And that makes sense, right? Ralsei's positive reactions to Asriel's / Flowey's themes respectively are a nod to how Ralsei looks similar to but not the same as Asriel. Susie reacting positively to Undyne's (which was remixed into Gerson's in Deltarune) and Toriel's themes makes sense because of how many similarities she has with Undyne / how Gerson mentors her, and how Toriel was the first adult we know of who ever acknowledged her positively. Of course they'd have positive reactions to those themes.

But then . . . if you play "Once Upon a Time" . . . the only reaction from either of them is Susie saying, "Sounds like crap" with an awkward expression on her face.

The thing is, "Once Upon a Time" is the main theme of Undertale. It's the leitmotif that is remixed into so many of the other themes in the game (including "Home" and most importantly, "Hopes and Dreams / SAVE the World"). "Once Upon a Time" is to Undertale what "Don't Forget" is to Deltarune. It is the theme, the one that represents the game more than anything else.

And the comment on it, from the main hero of the story (prophecy or no prophecy) is that it . . . sounds like crap.

And then of course there's the bit with "Megalovania", where if you play the first four notes Toby hits you with the fischer price car. Which, yeah, that's a reference to how many people used the first four seconds as a meme, effectively turning the song itself into a meme despite how it is (in my opinion) still one of the best boss themes ever created.

And that's what got me thinking about all this.

Because in a lot of ways, in the ten years (!!) since its creation, Undertale . . . I mean, it's still regarded as one of the best games ever made from an objective standpoint, I think. Certainly one of the most influential, if not one of the best. There is a reason that it blew up the way it did, that it garnered the fame that it did, that it took Toby from being an indie developer who needed a kickstarter and turned him into a millionaire able to fund his own team to make his dream game come to life. But as with all things that are popular, no matter how good it was, there were still who saw that it was receiving so much hype and responded to it with backlash. Reasons for this ranged from:

"It's popular, and I can't be so banal as to like something popular!"

"Isn't this a game for furries? I can't like a game for furries!"

"Undertale has a lot of meme references and silly jokes, and I, an esteemed intellectual, couldn't possibly like a game like that."

"It's a game where you're not supposed to kill? That means it's for BABIES!!"

"They may not be furries but they want to fuck a skeleton and that's weird!! This game is for weirdo losers!!!"

It didn't help that the Undertale fandom could be . . . intense . . . when it came to what decisions you personally made in the game and what interpretation you had of its story. There were people who would send you death threats and hate for doing the genocide route. There were people who were fine with you doing the genocide route, but would send you death threats and hate because you used the word genocide to describe it (even though that's literally what you do in the game on that route). And don't even get me started on the Characourse; I once had someone make a whole hate post about me because I said I like the creepy / evil child trope in fiction. Apparently this equated to me believing children could be evil in real life somehow. The wonders of fandom will never cease.

Anyway, all of this is to say that, with both the hype backlash and Undertale fandom sometimes being Like That, it makes me wonder if perhaps Toby is a little . . . embarrassed of it. On some level it makes sense; not necessarily because of the fans (or haters), but because Toby is an artist, and who among us doesn't look back at our past works with a little bit of cringe? Who among us doesn't look back at what we created before we improved like, "Yeesh, I'd do that so much better now?"

But while that's an understandable feeling to have, I just . . . I don't know . . . again, I'm sure I'm reading way too deep into this, that I'm projecting too much, but it just made me . . . sad . . . to see "Once Upon a Time" referred to as "crap" by the main protagonist of Deltarune. It makes me sad when I see that people are already saying that Deltarune is soooo much better than Undertale, even though Deltarune isn't even finished yet.

Don't misunderstand, I do think that Deltarune is telling a more complex story than Undertale, for sure. And Deltarune definitely has some QoL improvements over Undertale (I just replayed Undertale and the fact that you can't run . . . my laud . . . it's torture).

But Deltarune wouldn't exist without Undertale, something Toby himself has said. And I think that Undertale, while it may not be as complex narratively as Deltarune, is still such a tightly woven, expertly told story. The way that it blends the metanarrative with the actual narrative, even if you don't go into the genocide route or Sans' bedroom or any of that, is fantastically done. The characters are interesting and well designed, the music is peak, the battles are excellent and challenging without ever feeling punishing. (Well, perhaps Sans' battle is punishing . . . but it's supposed to be, on a narrative level, so it works.) Undertale is a genuinely fantastic game, and "Once Upon a Time" (and all the times it crops up in other songs on the soundtrack) still makes me feel things, the same way that, "Despite everything, it's still you" does.

I don't know. Like I said, I'm sure that I'm reading way, way, way too much into this. I'm just being way too sensitive over one of my all-time favorite games. But that easter egg just made me feel sad, rather than amused. I love Undertale's main leitmotif. I love Undertale. And as fantastic as Deltarune already is, even if it ends up being the objectively better game (and even though I said while replaying the first two chapters that I think it could be, thinking about it now I think that both Undertale and Deltarune are trying to be two very different things and so comparing them side by side doesn't really work) . . . I don't think we need to put Undertale down, even then. And especially not in Deltarune itself.

But I don't know. I think I'm just being hypersensitive, lol.

[adricthemindnimon]

I don't think any episode of any tv show ever has fucked me up more than Goodbye Sarah Jane Smith Part 1. This badass woman who has been through everything and come out swinging; who has seen the horrors and wonders of the universe and embraced the awe and committed herself to beating back the terror; who became this beautiful strong guiding light for both the kids in the show who forcibly adopted her and for you the audience (in my case the first go round a lonely lost teen on the cusp of adulthood). She fights through everything and comes through standing tall. But she can't fight the most mundane of enemies. Age and frailty and dementia come even for the most remarkable of people and she can't do anything about it, so she runs, she hides from the people who love her. She is doomed to a long slow painful loss of everything she has been and there is nothing that can be done about it because as horrible as it is it's just banal human decline.

Truly a more heartbreaking horror story than anything else.

Every time I watch it I sit there on the verge of tears begging for the reveal that it's actually an evil alien out to destroy her - and almost sob with relief when it turns out it is. An evil alien can be fought. Tim and age and frailty and dementia and death... not so much.

[atopvisenyashill]

Alysanne-Daughter-of-Maegor AU

Maegor Targaryen serves as his brother’s Hand for six months before eloping with Alys Harroway, a female line descendant of House Qoherys - and thus partially Valyrian, perfectly suitable as a bride for the increasingly desperate Maegor. Forced into exile by King Aenys, Alys births her first and only child in Pentos, who she names Alysanne.

After slaughtering every descendant of House Harroway - except his daughter - and naming Walton Towers as the new Lord of Harrenhal, a distraught Alysanne demands to know why her father has not chosen to bestow Harrenhal on her instead. In lieu of an apology, Maegor has her betrothed to Walton Towers’ grandson, Mathis Towers, who will one day inherit Harrenhal. Before the wedding feast ends, however, Maegor flies back to King's Landing, Alysanne in tow, and sends Mathis out to fight the Poor Fellows.

When Hand of the King Rogar and Queen Regent Alyssa decide it is time to send Alysanne to Harrenhal to take up her seat - and marry the last of Walton Towers' grandons, a sickly infant named for her father, 15 year old Jaehaerys absconds with Alysanne to Dragonstone where the two are married, though they do not consummate the marriage until nearly a year afterwards, when Jaehaerys reaches the age of majority in 52 AC.

Jaehaerys’ Seven Speakers work for him for far longer due to the delicate peace that could be upended by both the marriage to Alysanne and Jaehaerys’ conviction to marrying his children to each other. The Speakers travel for years, in between rests at Court, talking up the piety of sweet Alysanne as well as Doctrine of Exceptionalism that will one day apply to the King and Queen’s children at several points throughout their reign.

Alysanne convinces her husband to pass several laws throughout her lifetime and tenure as Queen Consort. Though called “Queen Alysanne’s Laws” in King’s Landing, there were many that referred to her influence as The Laws of Abomination, a way of undercutting the good Queen's judgement by invoking her father's madness and monstrosity. Regardless, these Laws of Abomination remain codified into Westerosi Law into the present day.

Though much of her reign as Queen was marked by the shadow of her father’s legacy, the realm began to soften towards Alysanne as she demonstrated a compassion, intelligence, and respect for propriety that far outmatched her father and even on occasion her husband. By the time her first grandchild is born, the smallfolk had started referring to her as Good Queen Aly for all the ways she had improved their lives.

some more explanations here for the nerds!

Talked before about my “lucas harroway was a female line descendant of the house qoherys” thing, but to go into more detail here: Quenton Qoherys was already an aged man when he was gifted Harrenhal by the Targaryens (this is canon), and was eager to move his large family into the seat. One of those that came with him from Dragonstone is his daughter Quannah (made her up) who had married and had children with Ser Lothston Harroway, a knight in service to the Targaryens at Dragonstone. The two had many children, including Lucas Harroway, who inherited Harrenhal through his mother when all of Quenton’s sons and grandsons had died. Yes I have essentially done a “Harry the Heir” in the Riverlands, thank YOU!

I messed with the timeline because otherwise Jaehaerys is just too much older than Alysanne for this to be a plausible “love” story - anything more than 4 years I think seems like Obvious Grooming whereas Jaehaerys and Alysanne have always been a more lowkey, "banality of evil" type relationship. So Jaehaerys is a lil younger and Maegor speed runs his meltdown lol.

If it’s unclear, Towers line goes Walton -> Jordan (Walton's son) -> Mathis (Jordan's first born son) -> A Bunch Of Other Sons -> Maegor Towers (Jordan's last son). But then Maegor is like “psyche my daughter is coming home with me” because now he’s obsessed with her and the fact that she is the Only child he managed to have.

I wanted to add more queens laws simply because I wanted to give her more proto social justicey causes that make sense for the time period. I tried to base it off legal rights women had not just in medieval Europe but, since we have the whole "Great Empire of the Dawn" background, Han China as well! I thought since Maegor jerks Aly around a lot, she’d codify laws regarding daughters the way she did widows. So Alysanne convinces Jaehaerys to codify-

A man cannot abandon his daughter. Daughter abandonment was a big historical issue and I think if brought to her attention, as a daughter with a deeply weird dad, she would pass something that says no, if you have a daughter with your wife, you have to care for her, you cannot just drop her off at some random person’s porch or leave her in the woods to die.

Matrilocal marriages have the same legal rights as patrilocal marriages. Basically, that if a husband moves in with his wife - whether it be because she married down & she’s living with her father or she inherited so her husband moved in with her - they should be treated equal under the law (I can really see like, Iron Islands especially being fucking deranged about matrilocal marriages, and since Jaehaerys is standardizing laws, this is a good one for her to champion).

If a woman is widowed, she must not be compelled to give up her husband’s business. She must be allowed to continue his business or, if SHE desires, sell it/rent the space/etc for a fair price to another tradesman. Merchant class women were usually allowed to take up their husband’s trade, but this is a series with prima noctus so I imagine this is not a standard thing across Westeros and once again something she would want enshrined into law.

If the only heir is a daughter, she must be treated as an heiress because a daughter comes before an uncle. This one I think would really gnaw at her - Maegor essentially takes what should be her seat (as the only Harroway left alive because he just slaughtered her family!) and divvies it up between some random ass knights, then in an attempt to curb her willfulness, Rogar lets those random knights keep her damn castle. It’s her last link to her mother! Too bad, it’s someone else’s now. She can’t take Harrenhal back without looking Maegor-esque but she can make damn sure that if all that’s left is a daughter, that girl has the legal protection to claim her seat! Essentially, Alysanne introduces the title “heir presumptive” into law and gives that title some rights and protections.

I also came up with backstories for her Ladies Court that tie into the Maegor change:

Barba Towers - as a way of trying to make some peace with Jordan Towers’ sons, she takes one of his daughters as a lady when she visits Harrenhal for the first time since her mother's murder during her and Jaehaerys' first progress. To fit with the Harrenhal curse, Barba dies of the same Shivering Sickness little Daenerys dies of.

Poppy Butterwell - If you look through the history of House Butterwell, they seem kind of, um, skeevy. So I decided that the concept of daughter abandonment comes up when Alysanne and Jaehaerys go on their first progress. Butterwell abandons one of his daughters after having several in a row and no sons, and she's taken in by some random innkeeper in town (which is also why she has a more peasant-esque name - her father doesn't bother naming her). When Alysanne holds her women's court in Harroway's Town and puts the pieces together, she takes Poppy in, arranges a match - marrying Poppy high above her station - and starts pushing to pass laws protecting girl children.

Donella Darry - Another lady she takes from Harrenhal, though not until after Barba Towers dies. House Darry is a prominent and consistent supporter of House Targaryen in the Riverlands, and Maegor gives the Harroway holdings (outside of Harrenhal and Harroway's Town) to House Darry. This is a relationship I imagine is a bit strained - Barba and Poppy are both young naive girls in need of guidance but Donella just kind of exists as this mirror version of Alysanne - an eldest daughter jerked around from holding to holding by her father. I like the idea of Donella being heir presumptive of the Darry lands after her brothers die during the Shivering Sickness, and this is how Alysanne gets involved in inheritance laws for girls.

Arwen Sunderland - I wanted to give the Arryns a reason for acting so deranged towards Daella later on (Rodrik’s daughters are so fucking WEIRD my god), so Alysanne asks Arwen Sunderland to be one of her ladies over Rodrik’s daughters. Aly means nothing by it, she’s merely trying to reach out to the Sunderlands, given how unruly they can be, but because it’s early in her reign, and everyone is reading Maegor-esque behavior into her actions, they assume she means it as an insult, and project that onto poor Daella, which makes the Arryn girls hostile to her, and assume a level of spoiled behavior from the very scared Daella.

Elyse Marbrand - I figured after being forced to watch all her aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, on and on be slaughtered by Maegor, Alysanne would be obsessive about finding distant relations. Since Rhaenys and Visenya were big on marrying houses and regions that had some beef, I thought an arrangement between the Riverlands and the Westerlands would work well, and since the Marbrand's are a pretty important house, I figured that was a good match. So to simplify Quenton Qoherys + Elinor Tully -> Alarra Qoherys + Andros Marbrand -> Elyse Marbrand, aka a distant relation of Alysanne’s (through Quenton). Elyse stays at Court even after she’s had children of her own, though, because her husband, Theon of White Barrow, is a beloved musician and patron of Alysanne’s at Court.

Patronages - Queens often acted as culture makers for the kingdoms and Alysanne already does this in canon so I wanted to add a little more with ✨Maegor flavoring✨for her to do and I thought Alysanne acting as a patroness would fit into this well. Again, a little breakdown on my decisions here-

Coryanne Wylde - Coryanne is already a writer in canon and I thought it would be so funny, given how scandalized everyone is over what she writes, if Alysanne is the one bankrolling her. I like to imagine Coryanne kept writing really weird and sexual stories and Alysanne loved it; like medieval romantasy writing haha. I think Alysanne kept this one a secret though because while she did find it amusing, she didn’t want people to think her lascivious like her parents, and in fact Coryanne takes great pains to always depict her Queen characters as sexually untouchable but not prudish either.

Septa Lyra - Lyra is again one of the women sent to be Alysanne’s ladies maid while she & Jaehaerys are in dragonstone. One thing about women writers in medieval times is they were often nuns and they often wrote non fiction about whatever it is they were studying. I thought given Alysanne’s disapproval of the Maesters not allowing women in their ranks, she’d want to undercut them a bit by bankrolling a few female scholars. But ALSO I was thinking given Maegor’s war against the Faith, Alysanne would go to great pains to make sure she’s seen as pious. So Lyra mostly writes about religions in Terros and midwifery.

Septa Violante - She is one of the Seven Speakers and I figured they’re not doing this shit for free! Alysanne rewards Violante by basically writing her a blank check. Violante writes all sorts of field guides, histories of the various castles throughout Westeros, and even several legal works explaining the historical precedent for Alysanne’s Laws of Abomination.

Arwen Sunderland (again) - Arwen writes prose and poetry and while she’s not as salacious as Coryanne, she does have a fondness for stories that take place in war torn kingdoms, going into detail about the fighting and injuries. Her prose and poetry is much more scandalous so Alysanne keeps the identity of the author a secret - BUT makes it clear she is the patroness for that author. The prevailing theory is in fact that Arwen Sunderland wrote the books, something Gyldayn summarily dismisses as nonsense of course.

Theon of White Barrow - One of the only men Alysanne was ever patroness for, Theon is a nephew of Theomore Manderly who lives in the barrowlands. Alysanne arranges a marriage for Theon with one of her own ladies, Elys Marbrand (Aly canonically arranged a match for one of Theonore’s nephews). Theon, who stands to inherit only a modest holding in the barrowlands, opts to stay at court when the Queen becomes fond of his singing, eventually writing many songs and mummer’s shows for the Queen. The reality, however, is that Theon was not the writer - Elys Marbrand wrote all of his music and stories. Theon, Elys, and Alysanne were so close that during the First Quarrel, when Alysanne opted to hide out in Harroways’s Town soon after her husband vacated the Riverlands, the pair came with her to play music for her there as well.

Septa Elinor Costayne - listen. Alysanne spends a tumultuous childhood being jerked around Pentos and Westeros by her parents, is hauled back to KL and given several new mommies to make up for murdering her first one, only for all her stepmothers to be tortured to death as well. I think Alysanne would develop extreme attachment anxiety to both Rhaena and Elinor in the hell that is the last few years of her father’s life. While Rhaena is a complicated matter - I love their relationship as sisters and I think a 'doesn't want to be the evil stepmother but can't help resenting aly' dynamic would be just as rich as their canon relationship, so they are still CLOSE while trapped in KL - I have never liked that Elinor disappears to become a Septa!!! So I made the executive decision to disregard canon in this instance and have Alysanne guilt Elinor into staying in the capital with her, under the guise of being a patroness for Elinor to follow her passions. Even as Alysanne ages and outgrows the need for a mother, and Elinor stays only because she feels indebted for her life and obligated to care for this strange, disturbed woman, Elinor is writing all sorts of essays and papers so she has something to do. Kind of the equal and opposite of Alysanne's relationship with Gael - putting another woman in arrested development because she doesn't know how to cope with her own traumas pressing down on her.

[sleeplesslark]

Notes on Kabuto and Naruto, just to type them out for myself.

Rereading "Writing your story's theme" by K.M. Weiland and thinking about my fav boys. The chapter I just finished reading was about incorporating character into theme. No screenshots because this is less analysis and more my rambling

I think part of why I find Kabuto so interesting paired with Naruto is that they kind of force change on each other.

Fundamentally both of them are very stubborn characters who jump to extreme solutions in ways that horrify and amaze others (I'm thinking of Kabuto injecting Orochimaru into himself and Naruto asserting he'd die with Sasuke, I'm thinking of Naruto stabbing himself to bleed out poison and Kabuto stabbing himself to bleed on Tsunade). Kabuto, due to his experiences, ends up believing that there's no point in resistance, safety and security are the most important. Naruto believes in taking leaps of faith and building his wings on the way down if he thinks the reward is great enough.

And like all good Naruto villians, Naruto could have ended up like Kabuto. Both Nonou and Iruka accepted and gave family to these boys, and if Iruka had died against Mizuki or if Naruto had somehow been made to hurt him, or if Nonou had survived and seen Kabuto under what she was made to see by Konoha, then we could have had a Naruto who doesn’t think risking himself for others is worth it and a Kabuto who embraced the side of himself that would give himself for the other kids at the orphanage.

I think Naruto coming to clash with Kabuto in the Sannin arc is fascinating. Kabutos unwillingness to really hurt him until the end and Naruto's refusal to see that, to only see what Kabuto is saying and not what he's doing. I think that Kabuto seeks Naruto out, possibly the first person he seeks out and at least the first on screen, after Orochimaru dies is fascinating. Does he want to be changed? Does he just want someone who might listen to him? They haven't been friends in years and yet Kabuto seemingly still finds their bond to be worth seeking out.

I think a clash between them, just them, would be fascinating. Can Naruto change him, this would involve forgiving a betrayal he seems to find personal, involve facing someone truly hurt by Konoha in a different way to Sasuke, and seeing if, maybe, the guy he befriended in the chunin exams was real. And for Kabuto, would he be able to take a leap of faith for the world Naruto wants to make? Could he look past the banal evil of the villages and trust Naruto to make something better? Could he let go of control and power and just trust someone else for the sake of a better future?

The fact they seem to fundamentally like each other adds to this for me. If they started out hostile idk if it would have the same effect but like. Kabuto never thinks of Naruto as the kyubi!! Kabuto throws himself between enemies and Naruto! Kabuto believes in Naruto's potential to become strong!! And Naruto listens to Kabuto in the forest!! He's so sad when Kabuto drops out and is eager to fight him! He calls Kabuto "big bro"!!! How can they not hold my entire heart and soul???

I know some of this was answered in other villians, Naruto facing Nagato, Kabuto vs Itachi in some ways. But ig that's the point of fandom for me. It's something I think is fascinating in part because of their history and personalities. Kabuto doesn't believe in any real goal beyond accumulating enough power to feel safe (he wants to destroy konoha in the war as a goal he inherited from orochimaru not for its own sake, for instance), and Naruto isn't going to be able to deal with kabuto the way Itachi did. It would inevitably end up being very personal, I think, opposed to putting Kabuto in a genjutsu until he figures it out.

I just. I love putting them together. I love how they might force change on each other. I love the themes involved in their dynamic and how they connect to the greater work. I love how deranged they both are about their people! How they both sacrifice so much and end up in such different places for it. I want them to go get Ramen together and talk shit about people because both of them can be so arrogant and sarcastic and can look down on people. I want them to bring out the best and worth in each other.