#she wont admit it and sees nothing wrong with it but she 100% has one and its been there since before i was born.
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genekies · 2 months ago
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tag vent: sh, ed
#my meds arent working#ive been on zoloft for a month now and i think theyre making me worse? and all i can think about when im awake is relapsing#im barely eating again and i cant force myself to. when i was living with my old roommates i could blame it on not being able to go to#the store or them stealing my food (which they did often) but now? im fucked. i have reliabile transport to the store and no one is stealin#my food anymore. Im about to move into my moms house again and i really hope she doesnt notice. She didnt notice before but i was gone alot#i had school back then and a job/activities i was doing. so it made sense that she never saw me eat bc i allegedly did that when i was out#and back then i was restricting to 300-500 cals a day and fasting constantly. i think she wont notice though since shes also got an ED#she wont admit it and sees nothing wrong with it but she 100% has one and its been there since before i was born.#i havent given in to relapsing on SH though. but it gets harder everyday not to. its fall now too and soon to be winter so it wouldnt be#hard to hide. but i also have an appointment coming up to get an IUD so the doctors would notice and then im fucking toast.#my doctor already has me on a bunch of vitamins and supplements because my levels are low so it doesnt help the thoughts that it doesnt#matter if i eat or not because im already getting all the vitamins i need to live. fucking hell man.#sh mention#sh ment tw#ed mention#ed ment tw#sh#ed#tag vent#vent#ed vent#sh vent#eyestrain#eyestrain tw
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newtthetranswriter · 1 year ago
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Please may I have a Fairy tail headcanon of Gray Fullbuster with a female S/O who has Edward Elric's abilities from Fullmetal alchemist. S/O joined Fairy tail when she was a young child not long after Gray did..S/Os unlimited abilities meant that she can basically create anything that she can put her mind too..she isn't nicknamed the metal mage for nothing. She isn't proud of what she had done back then..she earned those abilities to be a metal alchemist at a consequence of trying to revive her late mother..she was damn lucky that she didn't lose her body parts..she is a independent young woman in Fairy tail and a member of Team Natsu.
So, I've never done headcanons before, but I'll give it a go, hope you enjoy these. I'm not sure if this is exactly what you're looking for, but I did my best, if you enjoy please feel free to let me now and don't be afraid to send ion more requests. Anyway Enjoy and have a good day/night. MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DO NOT INTERACT
Alchemy isn't an exact science, things can go wrong, and that's what happened when you tried to bring back your mom.
Unlike past Alchemists who had tried to bring people back from the dead you were lucky, you saw the truths of the world but managed to hang on to all of your limbs.
With the knowledge of the universe giving you a major boost in your magic at such a young age, you needed to join a guild to help control and grow this power.
At the age of 8 you wondered into the guild hall of non-other than Fairy Tail, a legendary guild full of powerful mages.
You were welcomed with open arms by nearly everyone there except one kid who couldn't keep his clothes on, when you first meet Gray, he was cold to you, not to say you were really any better having just lost your mother for a second time.
As time passed you grew stronger and more confident in your abilities to manipulate the chemical structure of items and shift them into new things. You primarily specialized in turning things to metal to create more useful weapons.
Master Makarov saw your potential and by the age of 17 you had become an S class wizard known as the Metal Mage.
Along with growing your power the tension between you and gray only got worse, almost like him and Natsu's fighting but with a little more flirting
like I see you guys sitting at the guild hall ignoring each other until he pops off with something stupid about being better a making things with his magic and you just use your magic to make something to hit him with using the table and yell at him about covering his abs because in typical gray fashion he's probably in his boxers.
At first no one notices the more flirty comments until one of you calls the other handsome/beautiful directly making the other blush
Being as stubborn as you are you try to deny it for the longest time and so does he
Now if we add on the being a part of team Natsu, it gets more hectic
I'm talking Happy teasing you, Natsu trying to tease you but ultimately ending up fighting Gray for something he says, Wendy is just confused, Lucy and Erza think its kind of cute that the two stubborn mages wont admit their feelings, and then there is Carla who just thinks everyone involved is dumb
And when you guys finally get together i don't think a lot would change
like yeah you guys don't fight as much or the comments aren't as pointed but there is still playful bickering between the two of you
I just feel that Gray is the type to show affection by being sarcastic
also spend a lot of time just hanging out show off your magic to each other and getting ideas from each other
When you get together Happy still makes stupid jokes, Natsu still tries to tease you guys but fails, Lucy, Erza and now Wendy are secretly planning your wedding as soon as it announced you're dating, and Carla is happy for you two.
Now on to some other aspects of the relationship,
If you are having a bad day because of something reminding you of your past Gray will 100% understand, and try to help you calm down
He knows how hard it is to have a difficult childhood and lose your family so he's going to try to make it better
he may not be able to bring your mom back but he can try not to fight Natsu as much and stay close to you for support.
and vice versa, if he's having a hard time with let's say Juvia being annoying, You would be there to try and be a buffer, or if she doesn't take the hint just telling her off.
Overall I see Gray and you being very close and comforting when its just the two of you, but if you're with the rest of the guild or on a mission you know how to be respectful of everyone around you.
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thisismeracing · 1 year ago
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I- I loved these new layers!!!!! Hahaha//
queen I have layers for dayzzz. I’ve spent the last 2+days hyper fixating on this couple. the lore that my silly little brain has thought up is wiiild. So forgive me if I become annoying. Just tell me to stop and I will. No hard feelings
Adding the online hate and maybe, just a tiny bity of toto not supporting their relationship at first or jugding and yup reader goes all in to keep it a secret and mick is 100% the supportive partner making sure she knows theres nothing wrong with their decision.//
oh this was something I was thinking about too. like I don’t even see this as being anything major either. like it’s wasn’t Toto issuing ultimatums or fuck smashing any headphones. he was just skeptical. He knows his child and she is a sensitive girl. wasn’t sure if Little Wolff had what it took to be in a relationship like this. I’ve kinda head cannoned that she’s not a social media person, she doesn’t like attention for attention sake, she’s almost the antithesis of your stereotypical gen z(very similar to Lance’s vibe. Happy with his safe people. Quite otherwise). So Toto is rightly concerned. He knows that dating a driver specially a Schumacher, whether they like it or not going to cause some media attention. I think in the beginning just assumed it would be a short-lived relationship and was just hoping that he didn’t have to pick sides. Or that anybody got their feelings too hurt. As soon as he realized that this was serious, his attitude completely changed. Very supportive. But. I do think that that’s stuck around in the back of little Wolff’s mind whether she realized it or not. So when all the drama happened and she found out she was pregnant, she made the choice to keep her normal routine, just hiding as long as she could physically and then to subtly drop off the face of the planet for the last couple months that she couldn’t hid it. She just kinda because a homebody. And just made sure that any video calls were chest up. Don’t think it would be too hard to hid with how crazy the end of the year schedule is and then does anyone really expect the young couple to be around during the first couple weeks of break?? The answers no. Everyone except them to be held up somewhere shagging like rabbits.
The seb part!! Gosh. That golden boy menace has my heart. Always has always will. But there just something about him being beekeeper age that just hits different 😝
AND NOW MICK TELLING TOTO TO KEEP IT DOWN SO IT WONT STRESS HIS WIFE KAMCKWJNFNS AAAAAAAAAAA *fanning myself w my hands oof 🤭😮‍💨*//
and like they’re not married! Micks just been calling her that especially in the hospital b/c everyone’s just assumed. But in his mind. Like that’s his WIFE. She will not be disappointed after giving him this magical gift. Mick doesn’t give a fuck if Toto is technically his boss. Muck doesn’t care if he has to go full NEPO baby. He’s a Schumacher, he’ll challenge all of his father’s BDE/psychological warfare to keep that woman happy.
Alright, you got me into the secret baby train choo choo //
Aw but see the great thing about the secret baby train is if it’s done well it’s not the main plot point. Like just a stop. There’s already so much going on it’s just kinda swept away.
I won't ever get annoyed with thots, you can keep them coming as long as you want <3
wasn’t sure if Little Wolff had what it took to be in a relationship like this. // I think papa wolff is protective enough to have a hard time picturing his girl in any relationship, ti doesn't matter if its with a driver or a regular dude, toto just doesn't really vibe with this idea. he's used to be the one who protects her, and he's used to be the one she runs to hide behind, he won't admit it but he's jealous of sharing this duty with someone else.
Mick doesn’t give a fuck if Toto is technically his boss. // they blurred the lines the second he started dating wolff!reader so at this point he doesn't even try to be the nicest, he's honest, and he's clear about his priority and who she wants to please and that is wolff!reader and nobody else, she's the only wolff he'll get shit from (and jackie because jackie absolutely adores mick -cue to baby fever and all- although toto tried making his youngest pick the wolff family side, jack loves the schumachers way too much).
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autisticsociologymajor · 2 years ago
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American Healthcare Summed Up:
In the past week, my doctors have done the following….
Forgot to order my MRI from my last appointment because they “forgot what it was for,” and instead of reaching out to ask, they just……. Didn’t order it…….
Then I paid $150 for an MRI (which would’ve cost somewhere in the thousands w/o insurance) only to find out THEY ORDERED IT FOR THE WRONG PART OF MY BACK!!!!!!!
Why did I need an MRI? Because the last MRI I had saw that my spinal chord is being pressed on by b o n e, and the doctor told me it’s “not a big deal,” even though it causes me debilitating pain. Spinal chord issues are typically something to take seriously. Are they not? Guess not.
I’d have to pay another $150 in order to get the correct MRI images done. There’s no refund. No free MRI for a doctors screw up. Nothing. They fcked up, and I, the patient, have to pay for it.
They forgot to call me for my telehealth appointment. Straight up. 100% just did not fkn call me.
I called them an hour past my appointment time, knowing my doc typically runs late. The front desk first tried telling me about my $7 unpaid balance, as if to insinuate I wasn’t being called because i owe them $7. I said I’d pay it later today & then suddenly their excuse was “well the doctor is running late.”
My appointment was at 10am. I called at 11am & had that conversation. So 12pm comes, then 1pm, 2pm….. nothing. I call again. I get sent to voicemail. I leave a voicemail. And I get no response. Nothing at all. Whatsoever.
I then send a message in the patient portal, knowing they’ll try to charge me $75 for a missed appointment for an appointment THEY MISSED, in order to get something in writing saying I was the one who was never called.
I didn’t get a response until 11pm…. From somebody who just decided to make me an 8am appointment for the next day without even asking if I was available or if I wanted one. They also scheduled me with a provider I’ve never seen, who is also a man, again, without asking and without being sensitive to literally anything at all.
AND THEN I get a message from SOMEONE ELSE at the doctors office at 7am the next day telling me “the doctor tried calling but couldn’t get ahold of you.” BULL. SH!T. WTF.
I had zero missed calls. I specifically made myself available. My call log has zero incoming calls from anybody in the past week. “She tried calling” WHATEVER. They do this sh!t to cover their own a$$es & to get patients to pay missed appointment fees😤
So whatever. I see the new guy I’ve never met and had no desire to see. And guess what. Guess what.
He tells me I need a drvg test because I’m prescribed ADHD medicine and tells me it’s a “DEA requirement.” It’s not a DEA requirement. Know how I know? Because I had to force them to admit it.
Someone else I know who also takes medication for adhd was told the same thing about the DEA by this doctors office. Neither of us have ever been asked this question in the many years we’ve been taking meds for adhd.
It’s not a DEA requirement to be drvg tested if you’re prescribed adhd meds for adhd. I did research and found nothing before I decided to call them again to ask what they’re talking about. I was apparently not the first person to call and ask.
I asked them specifically where the DEA says they require it and suddenly it was “well it’s not so much of a DEA thing, it’s more an office policy.”
It’s an office policy. It’s not even a law anywhere at all.
It’s NOT EVEN A LAW!!??!??? And they’re going around telling patients it’s a requirement from the literal DEA??? FOR WHAT? WHY? Just say it’s an office policy? Sketchy a$$es. I would’ve been more willing to do it if I wasn’t lied to first thing. Now I don’t think I will at all. I shouldn’t have to either. I’ve been taking these meds for four years. I’m diagnosed with adhd. Wtf?
Then she tried to backtrack herself and said “it will be a law in this state starting in January.” IT WONT BE THOUGH! I RESEARCHED THAT TOO! I FOUND NOTHING! WHAT THE FUCCKKKKKK???????
They also tried charging me $1,000 for an ALLERGY TEST because they put the incorrect information in to send to my insurance company. And then tried to tell me they did nothing wrong. I literally had to argue with them to do it correctly.
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stopbeingnecrophiles · 4 years ago
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⚠️warning post regarding the users weimu (now ppgd), flonnezillas, & stupidneet (check blog description for updated urls)
UPDATE AS OF 5/02/2021 (BEFORE POSTING):  the user weimu now goes under the name “gabberzon“. this url was a past username flonnezillas owned, and is now in use under the user weimu. user flonnezillas has terminated (to our knowledge). stupidneet has also changed her url to darkishcircles. UPDATE AS OF 5/14/2021 (BEFORE POSTING): raquel has deleted her server. the people behind the post still find everything here relevant and necessary to bring to light. 
the following post was made as a warning to showcase the behavior of some of the users on the site. if you're a minor we highly discourage you from interacting with any of the individuals mentioned; if you're 18+, do as you wish but with discretion (and the trigger warnings in mind). we find the things these users have said and done to be morally reprehensible, and to be genuinely concerning. this isn't some random petty callout post; we sincerely believe the behavior of those mentioned to be genuinely concerning and need to be brought to light.
that being said, we also do not condone the harassment or hate towards these users. the people behind this blog recognize that bringing forth this sort of thing may incite other users to do so, but we highly are against it. sending hate and harassment is not the way to go about this. simply stay away from those users if you have nothing better to add to the situation. thank you.
(all images have been censored for proper viewing. if you don't believe the claims being made, you're free to ask for the uncensored versions of the screenshots off anonymous so long as you're 18+. usernames/icons censored are of the minors or those irrelevant to the post in the server.)
⚠️ major tw: necrophilia, lolicon + pedophilia mentions, nsfw, irl gore (one image in particular contains a 17 year old girl)/drawn guro, & underaged characters in torture/sexual situations. ⚠️
users mentioned + their past/present urls (please check description of the blog for updated urls): 
raquel/witch/cas (17 yrs at the time of posting) (neko865 > ureshichan > autismchan > weimu >  gabberzon >  omduvarmin > ppgd | past sideblogs were disgustchan, suicidegirlsjp, and now currently speedcorebeach [tw for guro/gore]) 
dasch/rena (18 yrs at the time of posting ) (catgirlmode >  slashermedia > mawisa > stupidneet > femcelirl > darkishcircles  > aspiechan > 719203727299272910822810 > 71920372729922980822810) 
maid/val/vale/valentine (20 yrs at the time of posting ) (morimiyamiddleschoolshooting > raspberry-valentine > nekrofylia > phonestalker > gabberzon > pukemaid > morimiya > flonnezillas | sideblog named ichigomashimaros)
url proof here. 
TW: THE SERVER ITSELF AND ITS CONTENTS
first thing we’d like to address here is raquel’s server and what goes on in it, as the server is not at all properly ran or moderated well. on her blog, she explicitly states this:
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but still allows those under the age of 16 to join her server, and doesn’t even make it mandatory to make an intro or for the users in there to state if they’re a minor or not. however there are minors that are in the server, and it’s clear who they are. we wont be showing who they are, but there are a handful that have joined and are active within it.
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raquel herself is also a minor (being 17) so it’s odd that she wouldn’t make sure that fellow minors wouldn’t be kept away from some of the things that are said and shown in the server. that being said, a few of the conversations that have gone on publicly in the server have been about:
dasch’s tights and how sweaty they were, with raquel and maid talking about wanting to do things to her tights
dasch offering her bra 
talking about having phone sex together
openly condoning gore in the chats and saying it’s fine to be 100% okay with gore (which isn’t true, it’s fine to have a fascination with gore but to be 100% okay with it or even obsess over it is not okay). 
(screenshots of the conversations can be found here & here.)
we recognize that a few of these conversations are obviously jokes/banter between the three, but it is still wildly inappropriate to publicly talk like this where minors can see. you have an nsfw chat, at least use it properly.  (important to note: in raquel’s server, the nsfw & real life gore channels were opened to the public for awhile, accessible to anyone at any age, before there was a complaint to make them hidden with a role. even with a role implemented, the guro channel is still visible to those who have the ‘baby’ role [and as guro is, the content is very sexual].)
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TW: NECROPHILIA IN THE SERVER
second thing that is worthy of being addressed is how (mainly) dasch and maid fetishize irl gore, dead bodies, and crime scene photos. as stated prior, we’ve censored out the images that were posted, but if you would prefer to see uncensored versions of the images (if you somehow don’t believe what is being censored), you’re welcomed to come off anon and ask for the uncensored versions (so long as you are 18+). like the rest of the screenshots, they can be found in a separate link here.
TW: CONTENTS OF THEIR BLOGS & SOCIAL MEDIA
third thing that is noteworthy of the people mentioned are the things they post publicly to their blogs. on raquel’s blogs, she has warnings in her pinned posts. 
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the warnings on her blog, while one being genuine and the other uncaring, do in fact warn users that content on her blogs are nsfw and explicitly state what she posts. however, this doesn’t mean she is exempt from criticism of what she posts. anytime raquel is called out for posting something questionable, she simply blames it all on “terfs”, that she’s allowed to post the things she posts because she is also a minor, or that you’re in the wrong for insinuating that a csa victim would even have lolicon art. raquel is not free from criticism from this, as she has posted art with actual children in it. the people behind this post mean no disrespect to raquel and the things she has been through and we respect that entirely. that being said, this does not mean you are free from criticism of the things you post willingly to your blogs. especially when some of the things you’ve posted in the past include children.  when asked why she doesn’t credit artists on her guro blog, this is what she responded with:
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someone in her notes also pointed this out, but to our knowledge she never acknowledged what they replied to the post with (censored out as they are not relevant to the post).
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regardless if you credit the artist or not, people can reverse image search to find the creator themselves. it’s also worth mentioning that you are blatantly admitting to posting from a pedophilic artist. you are still supporting this pedophile’s art by doing so. you are admitting the guro content you post is from pedophilic sources, and regardless if you source them or not, you are inherently posting pedophilic content.
we’ve provided examples of posts on her main blog here, and examples of posts on her sideblog here. major tw (for lolicon art & underaged characters), although we’ve censored the images, the content is still pretty intense. 
the next person we would like to shed light to and the things they post are maid. since the post started, maid has terminated her account. however some screenshot examples (with links) still exist, so those are what we will be using to explain the sorts of things she posts/has posted. 
before we go on, we would like to make it clear that we have no definitive proof that maid is a pedophile, but the content she is into is very questionable due to the nature of what they are. a few of things that she is into can be considered lolibait, which includes a lot of underaged girls. 
examples of the media (click the links for examples of her posting about it):
ichigo mashimaro (strawberry marshmallow): an anime/manga about 10-12 year old girls, that while not problematic itself, the creator of the anime makes lolicon-esque content of the girls (outside of the anime/manga). the media is also heavily known for being liked by lolicons.
ro-kyu-bu!: an anime surrounding a basketball team comprised of mostly young girls, the content of the anime itself is rather deplorable as it sexualizes the young girls very frequently (which is basically the only plot it has). very much known for being lolibait and liked by lolicons. 
on her main blog, she had reblogged this post:
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(post contains two young teenagers from yuru yuri.)
just on the surface, this image isn’t necessarily sexual and we do not claim that maid reblogged this with sexual intentions, however with her consumption of media known for lolibait, it makes it questionable. 
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she also has a body pillow of satou matsuzaka, a 15 year old girl from the anime “my happy sugar life”. we wont be getting into the content of the anime here, but it should be odd enough that this 20 year old woman has a pillow of a 15 year old girl. 
the last thing we’d like to address with maid is the posts on her instagram (can be found here. major tw for guro & emetophilia [all of which is censored]). a main point here that we haven’t brought up is that she blatantly fetishizes asian women and often posts about them. you can go here to look at a few of the things she’s posted and the fetish nature of the content she puts out there involving them. 
CONCLUSION
the point of this post was to highlight a few users in the animecore community who are clearly unable to host servers or interact around minors properly. we still do not condone the harassment of these users, and we would highly recommend to simply block them in response to this post rather than seek them out and harass them. there’s no point in doing so, however we realize we cannot stop every single person who reads this post from doing something. all we can do is state that we are against doing so and have no want or need to engage with that sort of behavior. 
to the users this post highlighted, if you’ve read everything through, good on you. instead of taking this as a call out post for drama (which genuinely was not the intent of this post), maybe the few of you can recognize the faults you have here and work on them and change for the better. this isn’t some post made because those behind it had personal beef or something with the users it mentions. this post was made because some of you cannot behave and act appropriately when interacting with minors and the general public. clearly not, as a server was allowed to exist with tons of minors alongside fucking weirdos. maybe give a shit about the minors you allow to interact with you. thanks
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miekasa · 3 years ago
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OMG PLEASE DO DAD!JEAN I WOULD CRY IF U DID
Y'all want them to be dilfs so badly...... fortunately, I would be a housewife for Jean, so I will indulge the both of us 😌😌
Jean wants kids so badly, he’s so excited and ready when you guys finally have them. There’s not really any nervousness about it for him; sure, there will be difficulties along the way, but he’s mentally prepared himself for all that already; he’s ready. 
He’s so gentle with his kids and, yeah, sometimes he does borderline on being overprotective of them, but it comes from a place of love. You’re there to make sure he doesn’t smother them too much, and reassure him that they’ll always need him, even when they do grow up a bit. 
I wanna say he wants at least two, and so that’s where you start. Your oldest daughter is about three when you have your second kid, and it turns out to be another girl. You were both perfectly content to stop there, but the minute your second daughter was sent off to pre-k full time, Jean comes into your bed room with puppy dog eyes and a huge pout and a declaration you should have seen coming from a mile away: “I think we should have one more kid.” 
(You swear to stop after the third, a son, who Jean cherishes just as much as his baby girls. You do not, and you have one more son, but hey, they say four kids is supposedly the recipe for a happy family).
They somehow all get Jean’s eyebrows and it’s a little crazy… a bit envying, too. The girls get Jean’s eyes, and your sons get his hair color, face shape, nose, and just about every other distinct feature you can imagine. They are certainly his children, that’s for sure. 
PTA dad that puts all other PTA parents to shame. Every event, every meeting, every fundraiser, Jean is there with a pen and paper in hand. He’s ready to volunteer and make demands and throw out ideas, and he’d not backing down to some passive aggressive gluten-free mom wearing capris. No way. 
Most of his involvement in his kids’ school(s) come from a place of distrust with the administration. You two spent a lot of time discussing where to send your kids to school, but Jean never trusted anything 100%, so he gets himself involved as a sort of reassuring measure. 
You can often catch him essentially hosting a breakfast buffet on Sunday mornings. Everyone gets their own little omelet tailored to their exact liking. When your firstborn gets old enough, she stands on a little stool and helps him cook; Jean holds your first son in his hand while he does it, and the other two sit at the counter, kicking their little legs in anticipation for their favorite breakfast. 
He’s always holding at least one of them whenever you’re out. This usually helps to keep them together, but also just because Jean likes it. He’s happy that they like to crawl on him and essentially use them as a human tower because he loves any and all affection from them. 
Your first kid was the easiest in a sense, or at least, she was according to Jean, because she’s a huge daddy’s girl. All Jean had to do was walk into the room for her to stop crying, I wouldn’t blame you if you were bitter after carrying her for nine months, only for her to look at Jean like he hung the moon in the sky himself. 
You gotta admit, it’s pretty sweet watching him be a first time dad. He’s always wanted this, so he was ready mentally, but he also did his research: parenting books, early-development research, even pregnancy books. And your firstborn was kind of the textbook baby, so she was a breeze.
Then came your second daughter and she knocked the wind out of him. Nothing he did with your first kid seemed to work with her: she didn’t stop crying just because Jean rocked her to sleep, she didn’t like being held or being put down for sleep, and she fucking hated her stroller pls Jean was just a constant state of buffering for, like, four months.
It’s with your second kid that you learn that Jean has a pretty good singing voice, because it turns out that lullabies in combination with him swaying her in his arms was the recipe to get her to settle down after a crying fit. You have a handful of videos on your phone of Jean dancing with the newborn, while your first kid hums an accompanying tune in the background. 
When your first son comes along, the girls are about seven and four respectively, so they’re at the age where they like to essentially be mini-parents to the baby. Jean could cry at the sight of watching his two girls help bottle feed their baby brother, and they’re actually quite helpful when you and Jean are busy at home. 
By this time, you both have mastered the work-home schedule perfectly, and it’s pretty smooth sailing. The only real bump in the road is that the kid hates baby food—the girls didn’t mind it, and ate it until they were old enough to handle solids, but your son spit up anything from a jar. So, Jean also becomes a part-time home chef, and his meal preps consist of blending up fruits and veggies every Sunday night for your baby. 
You guys will be out shopping as a family, and more often than not, your second daughter will be on Jean’s shoulders, you’ll push the baby’s stroller, and your firstborn is at Jean’s side, holding his hand. 
The middle two are the ones who argue the most. They got the… fiery sides of Jean, so they’re the most likely to butt heads with each other. Thankfully, your oldest is usually able to get them to calm down, and you and Jean think it’s quite cute watching them hold little kid-lead family meetings to work through their problems. 
He kinda gets peer pressured by his kids sometimes, and by that I mean he knows he’s not supposed to buy the sugary cereal, or let them stay up too late, but sometimes he can’t help it. They’re very cute and very convincing, so can you really blame him for the Oreo O’s that make it into the shopping cart?—or for letting them snuggle up to him for an extra 15 minutes before bed time? 
When your last kid comes around, Jean is a fucking pro—but he kind of always has been. He can have a baby in his left arm and build a princess tower with his right; he’s got this. 
You gotta admit, it’s quite… attractive to see Jean not only handle your newborn with such ease, but to do it while doing work, and keeping up with your other three kids. He really makes it look like he was born to do this. Almost makes you wanna have one more… almost. 
He gets complimented a lot when he’s out in public with all of them without you, and he tries to be gracious and respectful, but the middle two aren’t having it. (“Daddy is handsome, but he likes mommy.” “Yeah, he likes mommy!”)
He’s got to be careful about what he says around the kids, because they sure do love to gossip. They’ll even rat him out to you accidentally. 
Look, he knows that Connie has been his friend since they were teenagers. That does not mean Jean is willing to trust him with any of your kids. You gotta convince him that, yeah, Connie is a little… wild sometimes, but he wouldn’t let any of your kids get hurt. 
Connie essentially becomes the resident cool uncle, and a little part of Jean is happy and relieved that he turns out to be a reliable babysitter, but he can also admit to being a little jealous whenever the kids come back from Connie’s house and wont shut-up about how “fun and cool” Uncle Connie is. (It’s not coincidence that soon after, Jean usually plans some fun family activity, as if he feels the need to prove himself). 
Nothing drives him crazier than knowing that your first son wants to be “just like Uncle Armin” when he grows up. Armin’s smart and cool and everything, but he’s not that great. (“You don’t wanna grow up to be a nerd, kid—ouch!” “Jean, stop calling Armin a nerd, you’re a grown man.”)
Connie is the cool uncle, and Armin has some favoritism in the house, but Aunt Sasha puts them all to shame. All four of your kids idolize her, even your newborn, you swear you see his eyes sparkle when Sasha holds him. Sasha can do no wrong in their eyes, and they love love love being around her. 
Endless amounts of pictures and videos of you with the kids on his phone. He scrolls through them on his lunch breaks, and even drives to see you when he has a little extra time in the day. He loves having photos of your little family with him always. 
His favorite thing is coming home from work and hearing all the footsteps running to the door to greet him. He swears having you and his kids welcome him home is the best feeling in the world. 
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homieswithhades · 4 years ago
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why steve rogers returning to the past was wrong
disclaimer: im clearly a stucky enthusiast, but please, do not be thrown off by that. i admit, there may be undertones of bias because of that in the following, but i did my best with trying to lay out the facts and draw logical conclusions, so do please give me a chance. also, i may have accidentaly omitted some moments and some quotes may not be 100% word for word, as my memory lowkey sucks. ALSO this is NOT a peggy hate post!! i think shes a dope and underrated character and quite frankly she was done dirty. but i also definitely h8 the trope of badass woman falls for the hero.
first and foremost, every sane person knows endgame was complete and utter bullshit when dealing with steves character, so this post will be more for you to maybe show (and hopefully convince) some stubborn friend or family member. nice, concise (not) and including proof from the movies (+a few tweets and stucky undertones, if u dont fw that i respect it but bucky is an integral part to steves character regardless of how u interpret their relationship) here is why steves character development was thrown away at the end of endgame.
let us begin at looking at the cap trilogy.
in ca:tfa it should be noted that steve had no one to return to in the 40s, except bucky. i believe steves relationship with peggy was no where near as developed as it should have been to elicit him returning exclusively for her. as we are aware, steves driving force has absolutely always been bucky. bucky was there for steve after his parents died, when he was sick, and always protected him from whatever trouble he got himself into. "until the end of the line" right? steves relationship with peggy was forced and short lived, literally, we're talking a matter of months here. i need to keep emphasising the important disparity between bucky and peggy, as it is absolutely key in this whole argument. steve dropped everything and went against every order just to even attempt to save bucky. even the slightest chance of him surviving being captured was enough for steve to break into a hydra camp and free the 107th division. steve even had the chance to capture zola, one of the main villains and masterminds of the war, but again, steve prioritised bucky. when theyre trying to escape the exploding hydra camp, the exchange between steve and bucky is critical. steve says "go! get out of here!" as all he wanted was bucky escaping safely. he put bucky's life over his own (this wasnt the first time he did this, nor the last) but bucky rooted himself to the spot, and yelled back "no, not without you!". they both escaped safely as we know, and then steve gathers the howling commandos to take down the red skull. bucky then falls off the train, nd steve blames himself for his death, even visibly crying over it twice. steves morals went from "i dont wanna kill anyone. i dont like bullies, i dont care where theyre from" before buckys death, to "i wont stop until all of hydra are dead or captured" after. stuff happens and steve defeats the red skull and is now in control of the flying ship with the bombs. he connects the comms with peggy and she tries to convince him theres another way to disarm the ship. steve was so dedicated at that point he didnt even want to hear it. he didnt even attempt to do anything to ensure his survival. this alone proves, peggy was not important enough to him to return to.
next is ca:tws. The stevebucky movie. in the museum, peggy confirms that steve saved the man from the 107th division who eventually became her husband (steve was never in the 107th, just to clarify) i believe her husbands name was daniel sousa (as revealed in the marvels agents of shield show) steve then finds out peggy is alive and talks to her. she, in short, tells him she's lived her life, and it was his turn to live his in the time hes in. the "my best girl" line was unnecessary and out of place; again, steve barely knew her. again, shit goes down, and steve finds out the winter soldier is bucky and immediately drops everything, and becomes dead set on saving him. not killing, not imprisoning, but saving him. no matter the cost. "he saw me, and he didnt even know me" "hes not the kind you save, hes the kind you stop. he won't recognise you" "he will." god, steve KNEW bucky would recognise him. regardless of the brainwashing, steve managed to break through the barrier hydra fought so hard to drill into buckys mind. nothing ever broke him out of that state exept for steve. "im not gonna fight you, youre my friend." "youre my mission" "then finish it. cos im with you till the end of the line." [[good fucking lord let me break out of my essay-esque semi professional format here and just say how fucking heartbreaking those lines are. oh my god. read them, over and over until it hits you.]] steve shows us again, that he is willing to not only die for bucky, but literally die by his hand. he would let bucky kill him. he'd dropped his shield. he didnt fight back. steve always, always, ALWAYS got up and fought back. always. exept that time. the time bucky could have killed him. that scene is the essence of "im with you till the end of the line" because then, it was true. it was true because steve was okay with dying at buckys mercy. theres a difference between sacrificing yourself for the greater good (steve going into the ice), willing to die for someone (steve risking his life multiple times in attempts to save bucky) and finally, being willing to let someone kill you, because you love and trust them so much (hellicarier scene). the difference between peggy and bucky's relationship to steve is that steve may be willing to die for either, but only willing to be killed by one. not to mention, bucky pulled steve from the river. he recognised him. steve broke through 70 years of brainwashing with such impact it literally drove bucky away from hydra out of his own free will.
in between ca:tws and ca:cw its confirmed (im p sure sam says it) that him and steve looked for bucky for two. years. even off screen, bucky was steves priority.
im going to squeeze in 2 points from from age of ultron here, for chronology's sake:
steves worst nightmare, as portayed in the movie, is LITERALLY going back to the 40s and being stuck there (with peggy too??lmfao) and also the quote "family, stability, the man who wanted all that went in the ice 75 years ago. i think another one came out." objectively confirms that steve isn't the man he used to be, and doesnt want to return to the past. aou may have sucked, but that doesn't mean the character development should be thrown away.
ca:cw. hoo boy. steve went against 117 countries and half of his closest friends and colleagues because he believed bucky was innocent of the bombing of the un conference. god, steve quite literally, did everything to defend and protect bucky. though i shall acknowledge that steve did attend peggy's funeral, however, there was no real connotations there other than the fact he was mourning her death (understabdibly so). steve then proceeds to protect bucky for 2 hours 27 mins and 41 seconds to the point where they escape together to siberia after the airport fight. "i dont know if im worth all this steve" "what you did all those years... it wasnt you. you didnt have a choice." "i know. but i did it" again, absolutely heartbreaking quotes if you read it a couple of times and truly understand the meaning of them. steve somewhat indirectly tells bucky yes, yes he is worth all of this. otherwise, he wouldn't be doing it. a quote to support that would be "for the longest time, i always did what i thought was right." (disclaimer this is not a direct quote i deadass couldnt find it to save my life, i belive steve said it at some point during civil war or tws, but the point is, bucky is the only thing that could have shaken steves morals so intensely.) and finally, the most important part of cw, the fight at the end with tony. bucky and steve constantly protected each other. steve kept fighting because he was fighting for bucky. to keep him safe from tony and the world. he got up, time and time again. "i can do this all day." the fact that he said that to tony, some people consider them the closest of friends, proves again, a million times over, bucky is more important to steve than literally anything else, INCLUDING his shield. his mantle. he dropped it and left it like it was nothing, because his priority was bucky. as always.
theres not much to discuss for infinity war other than their hug whicg was honestly just adorable.
mmmmm endgame. i will not go into how much i hate that movie because it would be a rant quintuple the length of this one. in the support group, steve dead ass fucking says "you gotta move on. you gotta move on" and that sentiment was literally forgotten at the end. my main point for endgame is this. people tend to tell me, the reason steve abandoned bucky and went back to be with peggy is because he knew that he was finally safe. :/. if you had half a braincell youd know that's not true. the steve we know, never would have left bucky for good, ESPECIALLY after the "dont do anything stupid until i get back" exchange [[god i want to beat the shit out of the r*ssos]] mostly because, bucky had fucking no one in the time he was living in!!! no family, no friends and most heartbreakingly, no one he could trust. (yes sam was there but were just seeing their friendship develop now in tfatws, all that wasnt there in endgame) and secondly, what made steve think bucky was entirely safe??? half of the worlds population just suddenly reappeared, which as we see now, there were massive consequences for that. i simply believe steve is not that stupid. steve going back was disrespectful not only to his character, but to bucky AND peggy. most importantly, the steve we've been watching since 2011 would NEVER abandon bucky, no matter how safe he thought he was (he visited him frequently in wakanda, the safest place on the planet arguably ffs) especially for such a dumbass and quite frankly, nonsensical reason as going back to be with peggy, who clearly stated to him she moved on, and so should he (which he did. idk endgame writers prolly didnt watch the previous movies :/) its not even debatable. bucky is more important to steve than peggy. even in terms of screentime.
now allow some tweets to speak for me, this one being the absolute most important one:
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ladies and gentlefolk, all of the stuff ive said can be summarised in that last line. "it would be contrary to who he is."
heres some more:
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and now finally, id like to briefly mention steve and tfatws, so beware of spoilers (writing this as of ep 4 coming out; praying it doesn't age badly)
bucky mentions steve, unprompted, fucking constantly. he clearly isnt over steve leaving, and im hoping that gets acknowledged and talked out in the show.
in conclusion, tl:dr, steve shouldn't have returned to the past and stayed there, it is contrary to who he is, as shown to us through his trilogy and other appearances in the mcu. not to mention the timeline bullshit in endgame makes zero sense in the first place.
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bakugousbabygirl · 4 years ago
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Toxic Aizawa Headcannons
genre: angst i guess?
pairings: aizawa x fem!reader
cw: || cheating || jealousy || cursing || manipulation || overall toxicity ||
A/N: this is kinda short, but i might do more of these and make them longer and add scenarios at the end. idk
SFW
• he's a scorpio.....that shit is toxic enough on it's own lmao
• but fr everyone seems to have this image he's a patient caring man and i mean he is, with his students
• but you? no
• you're an adult, you should just GET things but you don't which frustrates him beyond belief
• you're his partner, not his student he shouldnt have to baby you
• i also feel like aizawa has a thing for younger women, he's 31 and he likes his women in their early to mid 20's
• i feel like that isn't inherently toxic but the way he uses your younger age against you most definitely is
• when you get in an argument he throws it in you face calling you childish and stating how he should've just dated someone his own damn age
• shota definitely prioritizes his job over you, will stay out late at night patrolling. he will stand you up on dates to go to hero meeting and even be gone for weeks on missions without contacting you
• luckily toshinori and hizashi are nice men knowing how their colleague and friend is so they send you updates about him to keep your mind at ease
• this causes a lot of fights. he questions you on why you're talking to his friends, he wants you to stay out of his personal life. you try to rationalize with him that you are apart of his personal life and needs to start acting like it. if he's gonna be gone for long you tell him the least he could do is give you a heads up
• he argues back that you should just KNOW if he hasn't shown up he's gone for hero work and should be content with that. he tells you that you KNOW what you were signing up for when you started dating so why are you trippin now.
• he never yells but his tone becomes really harsh and his words cut like blades tearing you apart cutting you down until you feel so belittled that your argument isnt worth it anymore making you grow quiet
• he'll glare at you and make a few snide remarks before leaving like a upset father after scolding his daughter
• definitely avoids you afterwards, i mean he doesnt come home for a solid 2 weeks after and you dont get any updates from hizashi and toshinori because he told them to but out of his business
• when he comes back he pretends as if nothing ever happened, he already said what he had to say. why rehash it? and if you're really still hurt it's just gonna reinforce the fact he thinks you're childish and thinks he should've dated someone his own age
• speaking of people your own age if he catches you texting or hanging out with a guy your age he's gonna be pissed
• "what am i not good enough for you, you think i'm too old or something!?"
• like no bruh we were just having a friendly conversation what's your deal, PLEASE get over whatever complex you have dude
• I feel like aizawa would definitely judge the way you dress lmao
• with alternative fashion coming back in style you have a stab at it and start dressing like an e-girl because it's the easiest look to manage
• aizawa laughs his ass off at you saying how that isn't true alternative fashion and calls you a poser
• yeah yeah aizawa is a fuckin gate keeper, you can't tell me he wasn't emo back in the day
• tells you to change and never dress up like that again because it makes you look like some cheap cam girl
• if you ever try to walk away when hes scolding you he will use his scarf to tie you up making you sit down and admit you're wrong
• he's the type to stress that communication is key but doesn't communicate himself
• its more like he talks and you listen if you haven't gotten that by now
• he refuses to open up to you and keeps you 100% separated from his work and personal life
• probably makes fun of your trauma, nothing too fucked up like if your parents are dead or anything. hes not that much of a douche, but if its something like your sister use to lock you in the dark cold cellar at night and told you a monster was gonna get you he'd definitely laugh
• would even go as far as locking you in the basement closet to see how you'd react
• also gaslight you using your age against you saying how he knows more because he's older
NSFW
• wanna start this off by saying aizawa is defo cheating on you with midnight lmao take that how you want but he is
• when you catch him he just says it's not that serious and it just happened because they have history together and shes more mature and experienced. he said it wont happen again so why cant you get over it, stop being so childish
• i have a feeling he'd probably complain about how annoying you are to her during pillow talk 😹😹
• he's the type to keep a straight face when you're giving him sloppy toppy to give the illusion that you're underperforming and can't satisfy him but in reality his toes are curling and he's doing his best to hold back his moans because your head game is out of this world
• definitely is the dominant one and he'd laugh in your face at even the slightest mention of you taking over ( he does let midnight dom him tho😒)
• it was this one time where you asked could you ride him so he allowed it, you got on top of him and just when you were getting into the groove of it he rolled his eyes flipped you over and growled in your ear saying to never waste his time like that again
• when you try to initiate sex with him laughs at your cute efforts of trying to seduce him saying he's too old for that stuff to be appealing to him
• he'd use sex to take out all his frustrations on you
• it seems hot but not the way he does it, he'll have you in his lap infront of a mirror as he pounds into you while degrading you
• it starts off cute and light with just calling you things like his pathetic kitten but then the insults start getting a little too real saying how he could go find a better girl with a cunt just as tight as yours who doesn't annoy him and how you're such a bitch and you can't nag at him now that you're stuffed with his cock
• yeah needless to say you start crying and hit his ass with the safe word making him stop and he just rolls his eyes and mutters to himself about how the younger generation is so sensitive and kinda just....leaves you there to mope
• also yeah theres never any aftercare even after particularly rough scenes like that he just showers then goes to bed and expects you to do the same
• and it's not like he doesn't know with aftercare is, i mean he's banging midnight our bdsm queen he knows what aftercare is but just doesn't see you as important enough to be that intimate with
• if you do something that turns him off during the middle of sex and kinda just pushes you off of him and goes to sleep on the couch and won't have sex with you for a while
• drags himself at all types of late nights and early mornings crawling into bed with you whole you're still sleep and kisses you're shoulder saying to himself outloud "i'll do right by you one day"
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faithinthefuture28 · 5 years ago
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Larry songs timeline & what it tells us about the evolution of their relationship
**These are all just my interpretations but the more I listen to the music they wrote, the more it all fits together. ESPECIALLY BECAUSE THROUGHOUT THE YEARS THEY’VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT WRITING “AUTOBIOGRAPHICALLY” AND “FROM PERSONAL EXPERIENCE”
I deffo missed some songs but these stood out to me:
2013
L-Strong: Love isn’t easy (waves trying to break it) but what we have means something and it’s worth fighting for. read: love is only for the brave (Think of how much love that’s been wasted...there’s nothing i’m running from...i don’t care, I’m not scared of love) And we bring out the best in each other so lets not throw this away (i’d do anything to save it...when i’m not with you i’m weaker). 
H-Happily: I want to fight for us too bc we’re on fire and our love is powerful af. ik we have to do stunts and stuff (and if (s)he feels my traces in your hair, sorry love but I don’t really care) but what we have is insane and fuck everyone else bc you’re MINE and i’m YOURS at the end of the day (i wanna be the one who holds you when you sleep). Together, we’re magic so just be with me so happily
H-Something Great: ****this song is very straightforward so i won’t explain it much***** (i want you here with me like how i pictured it so i dont have to keep imagining... We’re better off together here tonight). Written as a longing for what could be if they dont have to suppress the relationship. (script was written...want to rip it all to shreds) Louis’ response (you’re all I want so much it’s hurting) basically says “it’s not too much to ask babe, i want it too.” This has the kind of longing that ‘wouldn’t it be nice- beach boys’ which Harry has admitted is kind of a theme song. 
L-Through the Dark: I know all this bs we’re going through is taking a toll on you and hurts you and i hate seeing you upset (you tell me that your sad...you tell me that you’re hurt and youre in pain and i can see your head is held in shame...i just wanna see you smile again) but I will do everything physically possible to protect you from any pain bb (i’d never let you fall and break your heart, if u wanna cry or fall apart, i’ll be there to hold ya). We’re going through this together and I will take on any responsibility needed to keep you happy.  I’M WILLING TO GO THROUGH HELL TO FIGHT FOR US HARRY LOVE (entire chorus basically).
L-Better than Words: holy fuck our love is amazing can’t even describe it can i just sing to you foreva love u babycakes
L-Why don’t we go there: what if...we just forgot about the world and escaped and enjoyed each others love and rode the high??? Also sex
2014
L-Ready to Run: *******Followup to Why Don’t We Go There*********** But this time let’s escape for real bc (there’s me inside a sinking boat running out of time). Like i’m ready to get out of here and it could just be us living happily ever after (this time i’m ready to run). Honestly nothing else makes sense (without you i’ll never make it out alive...wherever you are is the place i belong). I know what i want out of life and IT’S YOU HARREH (i want to be free and i wanna be yours, i will never look back). 
L-Steal My Girl: all u thirsty hoes find someone else bc Harry is MY pretty princess. Srsly ask his family. But you can still admire how he looks in those jeans. We all do. You know the ones
L-No Control: boy u fine, let’s do what lovers do IN THE MORNING. bc we can. also you own me and i am urs
L-Clouds: WE KNEW THIS WAS GONNA BE HARD SO WHY ARE YOU BEING A LITTLE BITCH (you dont like it complicated...but love is never ever simple...you are tired of all the changes, but love is always always changing). We could be great yo, just keep fighting (if we’re never coming back down, we’ll looking down on the clouds...we go and we go and we dont stop)
H-Where do Broken Hearts Go: IM SORRY LOU BABY YOURE EVERYTHING (rest of my crimes dont come close the look on your face when i let you go... the taste of your lips...is at the top of the list of things i want). H&L’s call and  response at the end is basically forgiveness and acknowledgment (come on baby come and get me out, come on baby cuz i need you now)
H-Two Ghosts: *****was written around this time according to Harry******. This is fucking hard yo. We’re drained and exhausted and idk how much more we can fight for this... (it’s not you and it’s not me...sounds like something that i used to feel). That infatuation and electricity and hope that fueled our younger selves isn’t really there anymore and i’m just tired man (we’re just two ghosts swimming in a glass half empty, trying to remember how it feels to have a heartbeat, we’re not who we used to be...this was all we used to need). We’re empty vessels going through the motions (same eyes blue, couple more tattoos). AND WE AREN’T FUCKING COMMUNICATING (we dont say what we really mean). 
2015
H&L-Perfect: so what if... we get rid of the pressure of forever? What if we just have fun doing the stupid shit we love and makes us feel alive (trouble up in hotel rooms, secret little rendezvous, things you know that we shouldn’t do). Like we won’t be out of each others’ lives, I’m still around and we can find comfort in each other and even mess around here and there (I can be the one you love from time to time). Remember how we used to be young and EXCITED (when i first saw you from across the room, i could tell that you were curious) let’s get that energy back without the responsiblity of an adult relationship. And we can keep making art lmao (if youre looking for someone to write your breakup songs about). 
L-Long Way Down *****this song fkn hurts man. It’s overlooked a lot but shows so much insight**** We were...everything. And maybe that’s the problem? We’ve been through so fucking much, more than anyone our age should have to endure. (We've been in fire, Went down in the flames. We sailed the ocean And drowned in the waves. Built a cathedral But we never prayed) We didn’t know what we had. We were damn kids man. We weren’t prepared for all this. We didn’t know how powerful this would be. We didn’t know what it required of us. (We had a mountain But took it for granted. We had it all yeah. Who could’ve planned it). We didn’t know what to do with it, how to deal with it, so here we are. (We had a spaceship But we couldn't land it) We’re each other’s everything, but we can’t keep going on like this babe. (We found an island But we got stranded). I don’t want to leave you but being together is breaking us down. (Point of no return and now It's just too late to turn around) We thought we were untouchable. That love conquers all. Maybe, we were wrong. This is gonna hurt like a bitch (We built it up so high and now I'm fallin', it’s a long way down)
H-Olivia: I LIVE FOR YOU, I LONG FOR YOU, I LOVE YA. And i think i’ll always love ya. And I’m scared...of life without you (i get the feeling you’re walking out, time is irrelevant when i’ve not been seeing you, the consequences are falling now, there’s something i’m having nightmares about...dont let me go). But maybe just maybe thats okay, because you’re AIMH (you live in my imagination...i love you, it’s all i do). 
L-Love you Goodbye: I fucking love you and I’ll always fucking love you but i think this is the right thing to do even though it feels so wrong (i know there’s nothing i can do to change it, but is there something that can be negotiated?) We made some goddamn fireworks together though (unforgettable together held the whole world in our hands) and do ya maybe think...we can make them just once more? (if tomorrow you wont be mine, let me give it to you one last time, baby let me love you goodbye...one more taste of your lips just to bring me back to the places we’ve been and the nights we’ve had because if this is it, then at least we could end it riiiiight). ********in the interview with our FAVE Gwen Garcia, she asked if it’s better to say goodbye and end a relationship that’s not feeling right or keep trying even if your heart’s not in it. Harry responds with “I think it’s better to say goodbye...but sometimes if youre trying to protect..” Then Louis cuts him off and says “you’re going deep aren’t you”, brushing the question off as a joke but imho i think there was pain in that answer. Then Harry continues “if you’re not 100% in it, I think it’s better for both parties if you say goodbye”. And Louis adds a “yeah” at the end.********
H-Walking in the Wind: I know this is scary but i think we can do it, (you said to me do you believe i’ll be too far? if youre lost just look for me you’ll find me) I think because youre AIMH and i’m always in yours, it’ll be good for us. And look at us being mature, we’re killing it babe. We can live our separate lives and grow on our own. We dont need to make it messy and hurtful. We’re on the same page. (the fact that we can sit right here and say goodbye means we’ve already won. A necessity for apologies between you and me, baby there is none). At this point, we’re kinda part of each other right? So it’s healthy for us to be apart for a bit. (it’s not the end, i’ll see your face again... i know we’ll be alright...just close your eyes and see i’ll be by your side any time you need me). And you’ve helped me grow into the person I am, and I you, so that’s cool as hell, right? (you will find me in places that we’ve never been). We had a TON of fun (we had some good times didnt we) so i feel okay that we’re doing this (goodbyes are bittersweet) and starting the next adventure in our lives. 
H-If I could fly: I. am. yours. Louis. William. Tomlinson. (for your eyes only, i’ll show you my heart). Maybe this growth thing isn’t worth it, let me prove to you how much you mean to me (i think i might give up everything just ask me to). This is gonna be hard as shit because i’m so dependent on you (i’m missing half of me when we’re apart). I’m being honest and I’m being scared and I’m being vulnerable because I can’t lie to you and pretend I’m strong (i let my guard down, right now i’m completely defenseless). But we’re part of each other, right? (i could feel your heart inside of mine). I’ll always be here for you Lou (for when you’re lonely and forget who you are) even if for now we can’t physically be together. 
L-Home: I’ve tried, Harry. I’ve tried to play pretend (told myself i kind of like her but there was something missin in her eyes). But i was lost (i was stumblin, lookin in the dark with an empty heart) because none of it was enough, none of it was YOU (it was there i sawr it in your eyes). And then i met you and you felt the same and we’re both lost souls playing pretend who found magic in each other (but you say you feel the same, could we ever be enough?) Is our love enough to overcome everything? Maybe we can be enough. Maybe I can make this enough, let me try to make it enough for you. And if we go our separate ways, know that I’m here for you no matter what. I won’t let you be lost again. (When you’re lost I’ll find a way and I’ll be your light, you will never feel like you’re alone, I’ll make this feel like home). So go. wander. find yourself. Then when you’re ready, come home. 
 2016-2017
H- Sweet Creature: ***Harry admit that this was the first song he wrote for the album**** We aren’t in the best place rn. We’ve been fighting (had another talk about where it’s going wrong...it’s hard when we argue, we’re both stubborn). But it’s you Louis. It can’t be anyone else. (don’t know where we’re going but we know where we belong... wherever I go, you bring me home). That’s not even a question. I’m still trying to figure out who I am, but the one thing I know is that a large part of who I am is you (we started 2 hearts in one home). And aint no way I’m losing that part of myself (when i run out of road, you bring me home). It was always you. 
H-MMITH: Whenever you’re ready, I’m ready (just let me know i’ll be at the door,  hoping you’ll come around). I know I need to work on myself a little more (i gotta get better, and maybe we’ll work it out) but honestly i’m getting impatient and i want things to go back to how they were and i want to be yours again (once you go without it, nothing else would do). But I can’t communicate this to you clearly so let me just put this in a song and hope you get it (we dont talk about it, it’s something we dont do) ****Harry mentioned in an interview that he expresses himself through songwriting when he can’t say the words directly to a person because it’s easier to just write it in a song than have difficult conversations*****
H-ESNY: ****honestly no idea what this song is about but it’s something to do with them fighting and not communicating and being in a weird place before their relationship is rekindled******* edit: this could be about his stepdad
H-FTDT: I MISS YOU AND I’M TOO FULL OF PRIDE TO TELL YOU DIRECTLY JUST COME BACK INTO LIFE LOU I’M LONELY AND SAD AND EMPTY AND IM NOT FUCKING FINDING MYSELF LIKE YOU SAID I WOULD (woke up alone, played with myself where were you...we havent spoke since you went away, why wont you ever say what you wanna say) So until then I sit and wait for your sorry ass to make the first move (maybe one day you’ll call me and tell me that you’re sorry too...but you never do). Also like i have to hear from other people how you are?? (i saw your friend that you know from work, he said that you feel just fine) ANd you’re sharing OUR clothes with people?? wtf just swallow your pride and call me 
L-Miss You: OKAY BUT I CANT JUST CALL YOU BECAUSE I HAVE PRIDE TOO also my mates are trying to make me get over you (now i’m asking my friends how to say I’m sorry, they say lad give it ttime there’s no need to worry, and we can’t even be on the phone now). So i’m just numbing your absence with partying and drinks but CLEARLY ITS NOT WORKING (should be laughing but there’s something wrong...shit maybe i miss you...when i feel it coming up i just throw it all away, get another few shots cuz it doesn’t matter anyway...such a good time, i’ll believe it this time). This is weird bc like you were my everything but im trying to get used to this and it fucking sux (oh how shit changes, we were in love, now we’re strangers). And tbh, its scary af bc what if this is it (i’m asking myself, is it over?). BUT ALSO LIKE WTF U COULD REACH OUT FIRST YA KNOW (i’ve been checking my phone all evening).
H-Anna: wtf Louis how do you not see how much this is killing me. I miss you so much and seeing you on tv or in pics drives me wild bc you’re not mine. (I don’t want your sympathy but you don’t know what you do to me...everytime I see your face there’s only so much I can take...I guess it would be nice if I can touch your body). And idk if you’re replacing me (don’t know where you’re laying, just know it’s not with me) and we’re in SUCH a weird place rn how do I tell u you’re the loml (don’t know what I’d say if I passed you on the street...don’t know what I’d tell you if you asked me for the truth) so I refuse to put this song on the album and let you know this and give you satisfaction from knowing how gone I still am for you bc I have 0 idea how you feel (hope you never see this and know that it’s for you)
L-Always You: SO THIS IS ME SWALLOWING MY PRIDE STANDING IN FRONT OF YOU SAYING IM SORRY FOR THAT NIGHT... ok but fr i miss u i miss u i miss u i miss u and nothing else compares like i can travel the whole world and all i think about is how much more fun it was with you and the memories we shared and i wish i could just say thx fr th mmrs and move on but actually no thx actually fuck you for making me not able to enjoy my life without you. So like...come home? and wrap your legs around me? also lmao i took El to a gay bar in amsterdam for her bday lmao i miss u come cuddle me and i’ll tell you all about it
L-We Made It: looks like we made it, look how far we’ve come my baby. They saidd I bett they’ll never make it, but just look at us holding onn, we’re still togetherr, still going stronggg. Also to the fans, miss our single bed and the nights we talked about our dreams :-* also Andrew my man luv u
2018-2019
L-KMM: our love was youthful and exhilarating and fucking electric and i think it still can be. dont know what i’d do without you now H 
L-DLIBYH: We’re strong babe and we’ve grown and we aren’t gonna let life drag us down. I’m doing better, you’re doing better, this is what we wanted. And now any shit we go through, we’ll go through TOGETHER 
L-Too Young: Okay but looking back, that was a lot of shit we went through and we were just babies and i’m sorry for not fighting harder (i cant believe i gave in to the pressure when they said a love like this would never last so i cut you off cuz i didnt know no better) baby i tried, i tried to protect you but like it was just so much and i hate that you got hurt and i wont ever let that happen again. ALso go us for being mature and COMMUNICATING (face to face at the kitchen table, we can finally have a conversation that I wish we could’ve had before). ANd i know you’re an arrogant son of a bitch who can’t admit when he’s sorry so here let ME say i’m sorry that i hurt you darling. Like we were too young to know we had everything BUT now we’re old(er) and can realize that when we’re together, we DO have everything now and omg is this our happily ever after and we can have a daughter and name her Darcy 
L-Habit: do i need to spell it out for you iiiiii aaaaaaaaammmmmmm sssssssoooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyy. But tbh i let you go because it felt right because mentally you were already out the door and i needed to give you room to grow babe. And i needed the space too (you gave me the time and the space i was out of control and i’m sorry i let you down). but like also i’ve learned i can’t escape you Styles. You’re always in my fucking heart and my fucking mind and in every essence of my being and somehow I knew that 9 years ago and it took me this long to realize how powerful this really is (guess that that i know what i already knew, i was better with you and i miss you now). Ooooh also my favorite line i wrote (took some time cuz i ran out of energy of playing someone I heard I’m supposed to be and honestly i dont have to choose anymore) like who am i kidding, im done pretending i just wanna be yoursss now
L-Defenseless: I can’t help it okay theres something about you that doesn’t let me stay away. I need you and I know that rekindling this relationship isn’t going to be easy even though it feels so so right. It’s going to be hard work (sleeping on our problems but we’ll solved them in our dreams, wake up early morning and it’s still under the sheets) and we need to communicate and solve our problems but here I am, raw and unfiltered and emotionally naked in front of you ready to lay it all on the table (not sure how to say this right, got so much to lose. NEver been so defenseless). So like this branch I’m reach out to you and you be honest with me too babe (you dont have to keep on being strong for me and you. Acting like you feel no pain, you know i know you do...I can’t get inside, when you’re lost in your pride but you don’t have a thing to prove). Be open with me. Lets talk. Let’s solve problems. Lets have an adult relationship. I’m asking for a little vulnerabiltiy babe. It’s just me. Theres nothing to be scared of
L-Walls: And here you have me in my purest form. No lies, no secrets, no insecurities to hide behind. Losing you was fucking painful but i got through it. I’ve been through hell and back and I’ve fought. And without you, I grew into the person I am. And any further growing i’m doing is gonna be with you. bc it was all for you babe. and honestly i can take anything life throws at me now. I’m strong baby. I’m fucking strong and fucking brave and fucking resilient and...fucking yours. ***** wtf is the I just hope i see you one day and you’ll say to me oh oh********
H-Golden: You are the literal sun and I’m not ready. YOU’RE SUCH A GOOD PERSON (you were way too bright for me, i’m hopeless, broken, so you wait for me in the sky). I’m scared to go through this alone, I need your comfort and your guidance (i can feel you take control of who i am and all i’ve ever known). But you’re scared to go through this with me bc you dont wanna get hurt and i’m too open so where tf does that leave us. ******this could be about coming out especially with the London AND NY secret shows where Harry added the lyric I’m hoping someday you’ll open*******
H-Adore You: You dont have to say you love me, you dont have to say nothing, you dont have to say you’re mine. I’d walk through fire for you. Just let me adore Lou. Like its the only thing I’ll ever do. read: Louis is a great person to just admire what he’s like. ALso I dont need anything back. I just dont want to hide my love for you anymore. I don’t need answers or promises. Just let me adore you. ********the music video is also basically a Louis appreciation post. He was the boy with the smile that the world took away from him. He found Harry lost and loved him and nurtured him and made him confident and allowed him to be who he wanted to be. But in doing so, Harry became big and unsatisfied and wanted to explore the world and was clearly interested in Hollywood and Rockstardom especially evident in his behavior 2014-2015. And Louis wasn’t about that life and didn’t want to hold him back. So he let him free. But they realized that they don’t work apart. Wherever they’re going, they’re going together, as the boy sails into the unknown following the fish. I see it as Harry’s version of “this one is a thank you for what you did for me” ************* I see it, I appreciate it, and I love you for it
H-Lights Up: ****fight with Louis. (What do you mean I’m sorry by the way) About coming out? About fame? (Step into the light, so bright sometimes) Either way, L is the guy driving the motorcycle in the video who makes H feel comfortable and safe until they get pulled over because SOMEONE wont let them love*******
H-Falling: What if i’m out, what if i’m someone you won’t talk about? Okay maybe I lied I do want you to claim me. Would me coming out of the closet make that hard for you? I CAN’T GO THROUGH AN IDENTITY CRISIS WITHOUT YOU LOU. I picked someone supportive and now I’m spoiled and I dont know how to be with myself. You want back in my life but what if I dont deserve it? (you said you cared and you missed me too...what i’m someone i dont want around). What if you’re better off without me? (i get the feeling that you’ll never need me again). I know youve been through so much shit because of me, things you’ve never even told me about and im afraid...that I wasn’t worth it. Am I being selfish? because either way, i want YOU (what if you’re someone i just want around). Does that make me a bad person? 
H-TBSL: ****Probably when they starting talking again but it was v casual and they didn’t really discuss their relationship yet*****. I MISS U BUT I WONT TELL U THAT and its nice to talk to u again i missed your voice but if u call me baby i will kill u bc that word has weight OKAY. Like i know you just call everyone babe and darling and sweetheart but baby is FOR ME and only for me when you wake up with me and cuddle me and if you think you have any right calling me baby without giving the luxury of being in a relationship with you then piss off because that shit hurts dude. (i know that you’re trying to be friends, know that you mean it...it’s hard for me to go home to be so lonely). ALso it’s not my fault i’m like this, you literally captured my heart when i was 16 like wtf do u expect (dont blame me for falling, i was just a little boy)
H-Sunflower Vol. 6: we were babies and i was so enamored by you and you’re so bright and beautiful and i want to watch you all day and make you smile and i want you to touch my hair and call me curly and i hope im not making you uncomfortable with my heart eyes but like how are you so perfect. I hope you think i’m cool, i’m really trying but like you’re SO FUNNY and charming and everyone loves you i hope im not embarassing myself. And now it’s like 8 years later and i think i can have you again and i want you so bad but i dont wanna seem too eager and im trying to have dignity and not text you first but like also i want nothing more than to talk to you. Do you think i’m cool now? did you like my new hairstyle? Do you think i’m funny on tour? I want everything i want to be domestic again and kiss in the kitchen and i want to cook for you and as;ldfa;sdhaf i want to buy you flowers everyday and shower ur cute face with kiss. boopx28 
H-Canyon Moon: Hell yea i got ma man back and i have a girlfriend named Jennifer ;) and we are domestic and even though I HATE being away from him for work (so hard to leave it) we have the 2 week rule yall then i can wrap my legs around him and after so so so long I’ll be h.o.m.e. Also did i tell you his eyes are so so blue like sky who i dont know her
H-TPWK: So we’re really doing this. We don’t need to have it all figured out. We can just be us. and happy. and dance. The world loves us babe. (Giving second chances, I don’t need all the answers and if we’re here long enough we’ll see it’s all for us and we’ll belong)
H-Fine Line: You’ve got my devotion but man I can hate you sometimes....We’ll be a fine line. Between what? love and hate? public and private? out and in the closet? each others’ and ourselves? Idk. But i’m going to swallow my pride (my hands at risk I fold) because no matter what, the worst possible outcome is not having you. And I never wanna go through that again. I know we have work to do on our relationship (spreading you open is the only way I know you). And there’s lot of unknown here (there’s things that we’ll never know) but what i do know is that i cant resist you (you sunshine you temptress) and i cant be without you ever again. I think it’ll be hard as hell. But when have we known love as anything but hard? And when have we known our love as anything but worth it? We’ll be a fine line baby. But i know, i knowww with every part of me that we’ll be alright. Because these past 10 years, we’ve been through A LOT. ANd it could have ruined us and made us cynical and cold and closed off. And I think at one point it did. But you know what we did? We fought it. We fought it together. Then we fought it individually. And we became BRAVE. And a brilliant man once said, “love is only for the brave”. 
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gale-gentlepenguin · 4 years ago
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ML AU: In Another Life: NY Special
(So a few things to note, Since this takes place after the events of this version of the season 3 Finale, there are a few key differences. Fu still being guardian is one of them)
-Gabriel finds himself on the back foot, without a fixed peacock miraculous, he needs something to boost his advantage over the teens. And at the rate Nathalie has been going, he might lose her as well.
-While desperately searching the book, he caught notice of the eagle miraculous, it looked very familiar. (He comes up with his plan to go to New York to get that miraculous), well thats how he realizes his plan that is in canon. But this version is clearly more desperate. He needs to know what it can do and how to use it.
-Marinette’s class kicks but with their sock puppet show and pretty much the set up for how the class is going to America is the same. Including Miss Bustier’s reason for not going.
-Adrien is bummed because there is no way he would be able to go on the trip, not with how strict his father is. Lila tries to cheer him up, saying she couldnt go either (cause in canon reason is the same)
-Marinette states that she will try talking to Adrien’s father, she seems to have a slightly higher opinion of her, its worth a shot. “Afterall, your our sock washington.” She says with a flirty smile.
-Adrien has heart eyes over his cute girlfriend.
-Marinette and company go ready to convince Gabriel to let adrien go.
-Marinette gives a convoluted speech similar to canon, but minus the extra bits of friendship.
-Gabriel complies, saying that she convinced him.
-Marinette is over the moon and immediately texts her boyfriend who is at fencing practice the good news
-Adrien gets his butt kicked by kagami just like in canon.
-Kagami tries cheering him up by saying they could use this time to practice and she can help beat the sad out of him if he wants.
-He checks his phone and is excited. He can go on the trip!
-He tells Kagami the good news, she congratulates him. But comments she will be bored without him here to fence.
_____________________________________________________________________
-Marinette Calls Fu  and tells him about her trip to New york, and that her whole class is going.
-”Your entire class?”
-”Yes, even Adrien. Can you believe it? His father never lets him go.” She is over the moon.
-Fu notes to remember that.
-”Well dont worry about Paris. If anything happens, I will be sure to alert you and Chat noir. You will have the horse miraculous on your person.”
-”I am sure Chat noir will be able to handle things here. I will let him know I am leaving. You could use a break.”
-Fu remembers that Ladybug doesnt know that Adrien, her boyfriend, is actually Chat noir.
-”I will tell Chat noir about the departure. You enjoy your trip.”
-”Alright, if you are sure.”
___________________________________________________________________
-Fu decides to meet with chat noir.
-Fu contacts Adrien to meet him at a rooftop.
-”Ladybug wont be in paris?” Chat noir was shocked. (He was so happy to be leaving for the US with his friends and Girlfriend, he actually forgot that Ladybug is marinette and that means she wont be in Paris. And that HE wont be in paris.”
-”Right, and I have a feeling you wont be in Paris either. Your class is having a trip.”
-Adrien doesnt bother asking how he knows that. He assumes Marinette told him.
-”Wait, If Ladybug or I are not in paris...”
-”Dont worry, i will alert you both should anything happen. Ladybug has the horse miraculous on her. If she is close by, she can give you a ride, if not. Your astro form should be able to fly you back to Paris fast enough to get there.”
-Chat noir nods. He cant say he knows she will be close by. But he does know.
-Ladybug doesnt contact Chat noir about the trip, because there is no need to burden him over it.
______________________________________________________________________
-Marinette isnt late, because Adrien had G come pick her up with him.
- So they have some cute handholding as Marinette excitedly talks about going to new york.
-Once they get on the Plane, Marinette and Adrien sit next to each other. So we get Startrain 2.0. With them sleeping on the other, and being cute. No musical plane tickets.
-Alya and Nino are happy for the two of them, commenting that they are still so innocent. But they have no plans on pushing them
-Marinette and Adrien both end up needing to get up and they catch the sunset together. Cue cute almost kiss. But then Techno pirate ruins it.
-The United heroes step in to handle things just like in canon. Marinette and Adrien both internally relieved that they can relax and let other heroes handle things.
-The two enjoy a nice flight to the states
_______________________________________________________________________
-Fu may have called Marianne to help him keep an eye out in the city. She was happy to have an excuse to see fu. It was like a date for them.
-Meanwhile, Marinette and class arrive at the hotel. Aeon comments that Adrien and Marinette are perfect for eachother. Jess doesnt care.
-Chloé isnt depressed as she was in canon, so she isnt dismissive of Sabrina having fun with an american boy. In fact, she decides that she would be more positive. Trying to be the heroine ladybug said she could be. Though... being nice is hard. Alix comments that she looks constipated
-Sabrina is so happy that Chloé is supportive of her. It was a surprise change.
-Chloé was still not thrilled about rooming with Alya and Marinette. But says its fine. Alya is kind of creeped out by Chloé's more ‘Friendly’ attitude. Marinette says that they should still encourage it.
-The class sneaks out to go to the roof party. Marinette and Adrien end up in Aeon and Jess room.
-”Im marinette and this is Adrien.” “Im her boyfriend”
-Aeon is VERY happy to hear that. Jess is indifferent, but helps them both get to the roof.
-The class has fun and Hotdog dan arrives with his magical dogs of hotness.
-Marinette and Adrien have no trouble sharing the hot dog. Alya still a pro wing woman, totally gets Jess to play the song.
-Marinette is 100% down with dancing. Commenting that she remembers that dance.
-Adrien thanking Marinette for convincing his dad, and that she is so amazing. She is practically melting.
-”You’re the perfect girlfriend.”
-Marinette happy giggling and telling him he is such a cute dork.
-Yes there is a kiss under the moonlight. 
______________________________________________________________________
-Next day, the class is at the museum. Aeon knows Jess ships it too, cause she admits they are adorable. There is no need for an elaborate plan, so they dont have the class do the thing.
-Gabriel sets his plan into motion.
-Fu see’s robustus and texts Marinette. Allowing her to move. Adrien notices her sudden rush and figures there is trouble.
-Ladybug transforms in private and uses unify with the horse miraculous to make a portal to paris. Chat noir calls out to her. Which surprises her.
-”Wait, why are you in new york?”
-”Its cool, I cleared it with Fu before I left.”
-Ladybug sorta does the same thing she did in startrain and just rolls with it, just commenting how lucky he is that they were both near eachother, and that if he is leaving paris, he should tell her. Chat noir agrees.
-They get to Paris and start fighting Robustus, who they realize shouldnt be here, because Markov is in New york.
-Meanwhile, Technolizer, takes the sword and Sparrow and Uncanny Valley hear the commotion. They dont see Ladybug and Chat noir being independent, so they dont try to strike out on their own, they do the responsible thing and call for back up, Then try to fight him.
-Ladybug and Chat noir are in Paris fighting Robustus, and trying to find his weakness. But after a bit, Robustus just vanishes. Confusing the two. ladybug uses her Lucky charm to fix the damage, and then they get a portal to head back. Ladybug and Chat noir head back.  Ladybug is mad suspicious over the sudden monster that seemed like all for nothing.
-Ladybug and Chat noir arrive to see the damage to the museum. Hawkmoth had successfully snatched the Eagle necklace thanks to the distraction from Technolizer. He is able to help the villain escape from the heroes, who were having a tougher time with the beefed up villain (until Majestia got more serious)
-Ladybug telling chat noir that if there is trouble to contact her, and she would do the same. Something is up with Hawkmoth.
-Hawkmoth has the eagle miraculous. He finds out the power of the miraculous is to liberate people. Which doesnt sound as useful to hawkmoth as he would like, but he gets a plan. He reakumatizes Techno Pirate.
-The events left New york damaged, but the heroes were not angry at ladybug and Chat noir since they have NO idea why Techno pirate got an upgrade.
-Marinette and Adrien went to catch up with the class. Where a car arrives for Adrien. Commenting that he clearly made a mistake letting him come.
-Marinette didnt stand by and say nothing (since she wasnt depressed or downtroden) she told Gabriel that she should let him stay. That the heroes would protect him, and that she would be by his side.
-Adrien also sided with Marinette. Gabriel was shocked, and angry that his son would Dare disobey him (which stirs the seeds on why he would use Marinette as a tool for an akuma at a later time). Gabriel gives one more stern command but Adrien is determined to stay. (plus he wasnt bummed about everything either so that helped his confidence)
-Jess and Aeon wanted to go with the heroes to help find technolizer but Civillian Majestia and Knightowl said that they needed them to stay here to protect the tourists. Which made them want to prove themselves.
-Cue the Hawkmoth’s plan using The akuma techno pirate with the eagle miraculous.
-Jess and Aeon notice that things are going wrong. Marinette and Adrien both realize it as well and sneak out to go help.
-Aeon realizes that Chat noir and Ladybug are Adrien and Marinette (because she is tech and is immune to that glamor effect. And is of course is even MORE stoked on them. The four of them meet up and work on the plan thats the same as in canon, (using the door hero’s power)
-The fight pretty much goes the same way as in canon, and Hawkmoth is actually pissed off instead of happy that there are more miraculous. Nathalie is now worse off then before. He is now even More desperate since his plan failed.
-Majestia and Knightowl are proud of their side kicks and Jess/eagle gets to be a hero in her own right. Proving her worth. Uncanny valley is her partner.
-Uncanny valley tells them she knows who they are and that she will clear the memories so that no one will know. Jess gets the eagle miraculous. (Marinette tells Fu about this, Fu says its fine. It isnt from his miraculous box, not his jurisdiction.)
-Marinette and Adrien enjoy the rest of the trip with the class. Marinette commenting to adrien how amazing all these heroes are.
-”I think you are much more amazing Marinette.”
-Cue adrinette cuteness
-Gabriel goes back to america, angry and now so much more desperate then before
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onegoodhonestkiss · 4 years ago
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so jon is like 100% gonna become a decrepit archivist like the thing lurking around alexandria right
there’s like, a bunch of foreshadowing about it, going as far back as their first appearance in season 2.
from MAG 53:
GERTRUDE My biggest concern right now is whatever creature Mr. Heller encountered down there. (...)What was it? A guardian of some sort? Or perhaps… perhaps… it too was once an archivist.
ARCHIVIST Well, only two tapes so far and already I… I don’t know what to think. Another archive, an earlier version. Am I just part of a chain? A long, unending string of people who call themselves “the archivist” stretching back to… Are we all destined to end up like Gertrude, just following the same path?
so here, we start to see jon, who was already scared to become like gertrude (see the iconic i refuse to become another goddamn mystery line), start to consider there might be worse things that come with the title of archivist.
but it’s not until season 3 that we learn that jon is actively terrified of becoming like the monster in alexandria, in MAG 97, when he makes his return to the institute and has this conversation with the bastard man himself.
ARCHIVIST Am I… Elias, am I still human?
ELIAS (...) You’re worried about ending up like that thing, lurking in the dirt under the streets of Alexandria? Don’t be. Just do what you need to, and you’ll be fine. Understood?
so here we get canonical confirmation that he is very much worried about being nothing but a starving monster, desperate to Know.
okay, now let’s jump to season 5.
MAG 178, featuring one of the saddest lines on the show:
ARCHIVIST No one gets what they deserve. Not in this place. They just get whatever hurts them the most. Even me.
you see where i'm going with this, right???
and then we have this conversation in MAG 191, right before martin promises to let jon go if necessary:
ARCHIVIST Yep. They’re, um… They’re Archivists.
MARTIN Come again?
ARCHIVIST Did you ever listen to Gertrude’s interview with, uh, Sergeant Heller?
MARTIN Oh… that’s a blast from the past. Uhhh, I think so? Uh, World War Two, right? Under Alexandria? Saw some monster with a wei–
ARCHIVIST Mmhmm.
MARTIN …eye. Right.
ARCHIVIST I’m not the first Archivist. Not by a long way. Most of the others died like Gertrude, but some… lingered, and, well, let’s just say I’m not the only one that feels the Panopticon calling.
MARTIN Right. Jon. If… When we defeat The Eye, the fears… What happens to you?
ARCHIVIST Nothing good.
If, however, we find a way to somehow destroy or, uh, eliminate the powers… I’m not going to be okay. There’s too much of me that’s part of The Eye now. I don’t… know what would be left of me without it. Maybe I just die. Maybe I survive, but I lose… something. My identity. My mind. My… memories. I don’t know.
i'll admit, it might be a reach, but the fact that their conversation about the lurking archivists was directly followed by one about jon’s crimson fate………………….. many thoughts head full
and then, finally, even if i'm wrong, which i've never been in my entire life, this line from MAG 197, when they are discussing annabelles plan, has to mean SOMETHING
ANNABELLE Jon would lose much of himself, the parts of him that are The Eye. But he would survive. And perhaps more importantly, he would remain who he believes himself to be.
that phrasing is SO weird, man. why wouldn't she just say he’ll be okay? that he’ll remain as jonathan sims, but not as the archivist?
my guess is that she wouldn't, because he wont. he will remain “who he believes himself to be”. and, i don't know if you've noticed, but jon does not think particularly highly of himself. what is jarchivist if not a miserable little pile of self hatred and terror of becoming the thing that lurks under alexandria.
so, you know. hopefully he will die. if he doesn't, though? if he lives and becomes what he believes himself to be? there's some pretty strong evidence to support the claim that he will, infact, become a decrepit husk of an archivist once he is completely cut off from the eye. cause, ya know, he hurts and he hurts and he hurts, and everyone gets what hurts them the most.
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rosealine-bishop · 3 years ago
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Greaseball Headcanons
Okay so, @marastriker and I were talking last night about some GB headcanons. Not all were happy. But Im of the strong belief that no one starts out being the way they are and that their circumstances change and make them the way they are. So, playing off of that, here are some headcanons I've got about GB. (Some HCs may be familiar because they're also on this post here since they and I also were talking about other things and got to talking about potential kids and how GB & Dinah + Electra & CB would be as parents)
Anywho, I've talked about the background long enough, let's get to the main post.
(Might make this a two parter because it genuinely gets so so long)
(also @sweet-dining-car this is the post I mentioned)
TW: abuse, alcoholism, death, violence
So, for starters, GB wasn't always the way he is now. (Even now he actually deflects and has created this persona of a meathead who can be a total dick, but genuinely he's just a soft and nice guy at heart) Back when he was a kid, he actually was the cutest and sweetest kid out there. He was always so nice to all the other trains, and acting as a protector for all of the other trainlets (even if he was the runt of the litter. He just wanted to be like his favorite super hero: Captain America)
He would always be seen trailing Poppa or getting the most upset and doing his best to cheer up Poppa whenever he was having a bad day or looked even the slightest bit upset.
On that same note, Momma to him was like a second mother and both her and Poppa were the perfect relationship. (yes in my HCs Momma and Poppa exist together and same for the Hip Hoppers and the Rockies)
Unfortunately, at home, it wasn't as good as he could imagine it was in the train yard. At home, his dad was the biggest homophobic and toxic masculine guy you can image. A raging alcoholic with gigantic anger issues. He would constantly beat GBs mom and sometimes GB too.
His dad believed that BECAUSE he was the runt, that constant abuse would make him stronger. GB used to be the biggest cry baby but through years and years of abuse, would learn to hide it and "be a man"
His mother would sneak in some vinyls she managed to get for GB of Elvis or Frank Sinatra or anyone else she could find and she would help him hide everything when his dad would get home from work.
GB has always had a soft spot for dining cars because his mom worked close by them and he would sometimes visit her at work when he was way younger.
GB isnt actually straight. He's bi but represses it and hides behind the toxic masculinity because he made the mistake of telling his dad when his dad had a good week and he was almost beaten within the edge of his life. (and since that day, the abuse towards him was actually way worse)
GB would hide any of the abuse behind clothing and sunglasses and a cool guy persona. He would use it to deflect and pretend that nothing was wrong at home.
Eventually when GBs parents split (which was close to him turning 18), his dad managed to convince the court that his mom was unfit to be a parent. (Him and his mom talked about it before and agreed that in the end if the court asks GB his opinion on where he wants to live, he would choose his dad and then go find her when he turns 18. Because that way it would be best for the two of them)
So, at 18 he left without telling anyone and went to go find his mom. However, he never did and in fact found out about the fate of his mom from a phone call, telling him that she was found beaten to death. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what had happened.
GB actually blames himself for his mother's death, but like a good son, uses whatever money he had earned to give his mom a proper burial.
When he has to go back to get her personal belongings, he takes all the photos and rips his dad out of all of them and hangs them around his small one bedroom apartment. He even managed to find some old recordings of his mom singing and some old home videos. (he cherishes those and will play them when he's sad so that he never forgets his mom. and in a way he always has a part of her with him)
He actually is really good at metal working (thank you mara for this headcanon) so he uses his skills to make his necklace from one of his mom's old earrings so she's always with him and in a way that necklace becomes his lucky necklace in all his early races.
Speaking of races, his first race outfit wasn't the best quality at all. He didn't have much so he created the whole outfit from scratch and he actually used to hide his face no matter what, behind a poorly made train helmet, to hide from the risk of his dad finding him.
The longer he was away from that situation, the more he actually would hide behind the early version of the persona that he has now. He's always idolized Elvis and he holds a spot close to his heart for the singer, that he started slowly changing his appearance to look more like Elvis.
He started working out so he would never be seen as weak ever again.
Eventually, he made a big enough name for himself that he would get interviews on TV every now and then and that's how his dad found out about him still being alive. At first it didn't really click in his dad's head but the moment GB started speaking, his dad knew exactly that that was his son. (Yes he sounded more like Elvis but a father never forgets his son's voice)
So, his dad, as an anonymous donor, asked a young CB to crash GB in the next race. CB, not one down to turn down money did just that. And yes, that whole interaction had put GB out of many races and caused him to pawn off any and all belongings to pay for his hospital bills because any small sponsor he had managed to get dropped him.
(No one wants damaged goods)
and while GB is back to normal, he every now and then when he's super stressed, will feel his bones aching, like a phantom injury and he will start limping slightly because he never fully healed from that.
But now that he knew about CB would go to him and ask him to throw races in his favor, sometimes paying in sexual favors, sometimes in actual money. Because otherwise, he felt like he could never be at 100% and would always lose any race after his accident.
He needed the sponsors and money so he would do anything to get back into the top contenders.
He has major daddy issues that he and Dinah have discussed before. She's probably the only one who knows about GBs true past (aside from Pearl and Poppa and Momma)
Because of his trauma, he actually hates hearing even the word "daddy" so one night when CB accidentally lets it slip during one of their sexual encounters, GB slaps him. Thats the only time GB would actually hit anyone.
On that note, GB actually wont ever truly hurt anyone. For all he knew, Rusty actually did crash and all the damage was from that crash. He had no idea the Diesels roughed him up.
But one night when him and Rusty talk and he finds out about what actually happens, Electra has to get his components (namely Krupp and Killerwatt) to hold him back as GB unleashes hell and yells at the diesels. Like there is pure murder in his eyes.
Yes, sometimes GB hurts other trains during races but after every race they get an anonymous donor paying for all the repairs and a letter along with it with a long apology and flowers. (Dinah helps him spell check it)
GB has only cried twice since he was a child. Once when he found out his mother died (and thats the only time he would turn to alcohol. Otherwise he swears off of it completely) and second when he found out Dinah was pregnant.
GB is 100% terrified of thunderstorms because it reminds himself of his old living situation. Often times you can find him hiding in the closet or under the bed, pillows over his ears and under many layers of blankets.
He would actually be one to collect Squishmallows and other stuffed animals because he never got to as a kid. But whenever he gets any stuffed animal, Dinah names them. However, when his kids are born, he gets matching squishmallows with Norma Jean and Presely and names them after his kids. (Thats probably the only time he gets to name any stuffed animal)
GB actually really really loves Dinah. On the yard he may be this dick towards her but the moment he gets home he apologizes to Dinah profusely and will do anything she wants to make up for it.
He would NEVER do anything to hurt her and when she's pregnant will go above and beyond to be there for her. He even went to Dustin to ask for advice and tried to ask him to keep the fact that Dinah was pregnant under wraps (unfortunately, Dustin, being the sweetie that he is, cannot keep it under wraps and eventually the whole yard knows. Poppa actually gives him some of the best fatherly advice.)
When he finds out that Dinah is pregnant, however, he has multiple night terrors about his childhood. He becomes extremely scared that he'd be like his dad and both Dinah and Poppa reassure him that he's nothing like his dad. That in fact, he has more of his mom in him than he realizes. (Dinah even says he looks more like his mom than his dad, even though GB doesnt see it. She's also not one to admit that she actually knows that its true. She's seen a few ripped up pictures in the trash of his dad back when GB and her first started dating.)
Dinah is actually the one who helps GB compile all of the pictures of GB and his mom into a photo album. This photo album eventually has pictures of Dinah and GB and then Dinah, Norma Jean and GB and then Dinah, Norma Jean, GB and Presely. So its just one big happy book about everything right in his life.
One day, he even finds Norma Jean decorating it and Norma Jean, being the little kid she is is worried that her dad was going to be mad because it looks like he had a bad day at the yard and she just touched something that he cherished, even if she was trying to make it pretty, but GB actually tears up at it because its the cutest thing he's seen and now that book is just that much more special to him. He actually gets the whole family to do hand prints on the back and then sign their name underneath (with an addition of him writing "One Big Happy Family" underneath it all)
_________________________________________________________
Okay okay this has to be it for this post because there are just so many more headcanons and I wanted to end it on a happier note. So if anyone wants to know more I'll create a part two but for now this is what we've got because good god is it long.
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shipuu · 4 years ago
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So i find tratie adorable so this how i think they got together
We are gonna make this realistic not that “fell in love when we were 16 and somehow managed to stay together through everything”. Nothing wrong with that trope. But like i said ~~realistic
Katherine gardner - originally from washington dc. She went to gerogetown uni.
She has always been passionate about the plants and first decided to major in Agricultural Studies, but then she didnt really like it.
So she switched to environmental studies. Not exactly about plants per se. But still related to the environment.
She sees the way humans are destroying the world and genuinely wants to help
Shes got good friends in college, sleeps around a little bit. Has a good relationship with her father.
Extremely hard working. Work ethic 1000000. Graduated with honors. Got a job at an enviromental consultancy firm in new york.
Travis off to college. I believe he went to a college in ny to be close to CHB and connor. Probably a community college seeing as he couldnt afford other unis
Nothing wrong with that. His relationship with his mom is rocky. So she wouldn’t be able to help out.
Majored in business administration. He takes it lightly his first year, seeing as how he isn’t used to the education system because he lived at CHB his whole life.
He genuinely wants to be successful. To have a life for himself and connor. So after first year kicks his butt, he works hard and raised his GPA the following years.
Extremely good at math and numbers. He steal messes around, playing pranks on people but nothing harmful. Also sleeps around a lot. (Nothing wrong with that)
Malcolm pace made an offhanded comment about how travis should start a new club at uni called “how to steal” and he considers it before shoving the idea away.
During the summer, he helps chiron with any business related things (tax forms, buying shirts, selling strawberries). Connor and him still play a lottttt of pranks
Graduated with honors. Lives in brooklyn With connor who is currently attending college. They still visit CHB from time to time.
So this one time, he steals something but then gets caught. Nothing expensive. A petty offence really. He calls chiron up to save his ass but chirons like NOPE.
So he gets charged. And the court gives him community service since it really was a petty offence.
He has to work with those “plant a tree” volunteer services during the weekend.
Katie is also volunteering there for fun and mostly because during the weekend, she has time to spare.
Travis goes there and is genuinely surprised to see her since he hasnt seen her in 4 years. ( she doesnt visit CHB as often. And even when she does she doesnt see the stolls)
Katie is genuinely surprised too.
First day, they dont talk the whole morning- just planting trees. Katie is still curious as to why he is here. So by the afternoon she asks him.
Shes isnt one bit surprised about the stealing thing. She also forgave them about the Easter Bunny cabin incident as it was 8 years ago??¿¿
Hes kinda nervous and blushing when he tells her the truth. Tbh he had a tiny crush on her back when they were teens. But it sorta went away, as they didnt interact much.
They catch up and its mostly just small talk. The next day, they talk more and katie realises travis has changed. He isn’t as annoying anymore. Travis also realises that katie has changed as she doesnt lecture and scold people anymore. Shes become more chill
The volunteering thing is over so they exchange numbers, promising to keep in touch. However over text, their convo is dry seeing as they arent THAT close and with their busy adult lifes. They slowly drift apart.
Fast forward another year. Katie works at her environmental firm and they start a new project. The firms brings in business consultants because the project has to be a success. One of the consultants is obvio TRAVISSSSSS.
Again both of them are surprised to see each other. Like always they dont really talk in the beginning. Mostly small talk. But then they get paired together for a part of the project.
So then it begins, late nights, coffee runs, laughter at 11pm in the office. Trying to work on numbers and investors and getting the most out reach on this project.
They get to know each other on a much higher level. They start to like each other but wont say anything.
Travis admits katie is gorgeous. And katie admits travis is handsome (not to each other. They just think about it)
2 months later, katie invites travis over to work on the project, trying to come up with an action plan. He brings over beer. And they settle in. Its 2 am. And they both are tipsy.
The project is long forgotten, and start talking about weird things like is cereal soup? Is gucci even worth it?
Its 2 am. Katies apartment is dim because of the lighting. They are both drunk. Sitting on the floor, extremely close to each other. Travis find hers absolutely gorgeous. Her cheeks are flushed coz of the alcohol. And shes wheezing so hard coz of what he said.
Katie thinks he looks hot as hell. And with his knowledge on business she finds him 1000 times more attractive.
Travis kisses her first, he pulls back about to apologise, before katie grabs him by the shirt and kisses him back. They have drunk sex on the carpet.
When travis wakes up the next morning, he realises he fucked up. Sleeping with a coworker. What was he thinking? You dont mix business and pleasure.
So he leaves her apartment. And when katie wakes up to see him not there she is kinda hurt.
They see each other in the office next day. And travis cant make eye contact with her. Katie is super confused because she thought he had a good time.
When everyone goes to lunch. She grabs travis and pushed him into a broom closet. And practically interrogates him.
Travis admits he likes her and she says the same. They’re super close to each other(coz of the tiny closet). The electricity in the air is charged. And they kiss again.
Travis doesnt wanna have sex in a closet so he picks her up, slams her on a table in the closet, bunches her tight skirt around her hips, and goes down her.
And katies just trying not to moan loudly. But failing miserably. Travis stoll knows how to eat pussy.
The rest of the day is filled with luscious glances, slight touches, her putting her hand on his thigh under the table and slowly inching upwards.
They meet up that evening at her apartment. And they agree to start dating. They keep it lowkey not yet telling connor.
After 1 month, they tell connor who btw called it from day one. He’s extremely happy for them.
Travis gets a bit jealous when guys flirt with katie and vice versa. But the two them only have eyes for each other.
Katie gets paired with another guy from the office for some work. Travis also notices that the guy checks katie out a lot, even though she is oblivious.
because of their conflicting work schedules, and how they never get to see each other. Katie working on the project with “that guy”travis is busy with his work, and helping connor out in his senior year. Late nights where they miss each other so much
And thats when their first real fight happens. Hes yelling. Shes yelling. Travis gets insecure that katie doesnt want him anymore. Katies positive they are gonna break up.
In a last ditch effort, she goes to his place. And have a painfully truthful conversation on how they both messed up. They promise to do better and communicate more
That night they make ~~love~~ to each other. Not sex, LOVEEEEE.
After that its smooth sailing. They have fights now and then, but nothing they cant handle.
Their first “I love you’s” is a week after they made love to each other. She was making dinner ( shes a fucking amazing cook) and travis is standing behind her arms around her waist, chin on her shoulders.
And they’re talking and he says “well thats one of things i love about u” and after a second he realises what he said and practically freezes. Katie stops stirring the pasta and turns to look at him.
They both just kinda stare at each other and travis is so fucking nervous and then katie breaks out into the most breathtaking smile he has ever seen. she tells him i love u back.
Their kissing turns to making out and he picks her up, slams her on the kitchen counter and they have sex. (They also turned off the stove dw)
2 orgasms later. They finally eat dinner. And things between them are fucking amazing
After dinner they retreat back to the bedroom where katie is screaming his name and travis’ grunting heavily.
And it’s complete bliss.....
Also side note. Hermes and demeter 100% approve
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oh-for-fic-sake · 5 years ago
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Billionaires Bae-by
Masterlist
Warnings: Adult content 18+, slight smut, swearing
A/n:Right I'm not 100% on timelines but I'm making it up to fit in around my characters lives ect. Hope you enjoy xx
The time has come for you to become public knowledge, luckily Bruce calls in a friend to help.
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Billionaires Bae-by
You woke up with a start to the screech of a high pitched ringtone confused and bleary eyed you looked around finding yourself on Bruce's side of the bed alone rolling over on the massive bed struggling, arms and legs flaying about doing your best impression of a swimmer to make your way to you phone on the side table as the soft mattress and thick covers swallowed you. Just as you reached your side of the bed then silence the phone had stopped. You'd missed the call. You hung your head sighing until you heard Bruce speaking. Looking over you saw him sitting on the small love seat looking far to handsome this early in the morning, smirking shaking his head at your antics answering his phone. You pouted you'd moved for nothing, and now you were in the cold side of the bed. You huffed slumping onto your back spreading out under the covers.
"...Today?...Yes that'd be great.....thanks Clark " he hung up shaking his head at you as you pouted at him sleepily.
"Not funny" you groaned snuggling into the comforter debating weather to get out of the bed or not. Bruce's bed was far too comfy if you had your way you'd never leave it, tho you dare not let him know that something tells you he wouldn't protest probably encourage it. You pulled the cover to your face breathing in a scent that was just him, it was a mix of the fresh smelling cologne he wore and a distinct musky scent of the man himself. He sat on the bed leaning over pulling you across the bed to him by your wrists you rolled half way on your front propping yourself on your elbows stretching up for a long kiss he grunted sucking your tongue into his mouth a little before pulling back.
"Good morning babe"
"Yes it is. Sweets" you giggled sitting up fully yawning and stretching he got off the bed taking the belt he had hung over the love seat and pulled it through the loops buckling it. You licked your lips unconsciously as he looked at you through the top of his eyes grinning. Then a thought hit you.
"Where did you go last night?" you asked he tilted his head at you. You'd noticed since staying at the manor that he didn't get much sleep. Maybe three to four hours a night. He normally slipped out of bed somewhere between nine and ten then didn't return until around five or six am, it was concerning, when you asked Alfred he had just given you a vague answer ,about work emergencies and stress then that Bruce had had trouble sleeping since his parents and that he was probably leaving the room so he wouldn't wake you as well. All valid reasons you supposed letting it go but you would like to hear it from Bruce himself. He looked up sighing looking a little guilty and seemed off.
"I'm sorry did I wake you?" he asked sitting back down on the bed slipping on his shoes you shimmied down onto the floor and padded around to him softly ruffling his hair moving to cup his face caressing the small scruff he had.
"No... I noticed you were gone when I used the bathroom.... is everything ok?" you said calmly, he tilted his head kissing your palms one by one then held them in his own.
"Yes .....I just have problems sleeping... at first it was nightmares of ...well you know.. then it just became a habit I cant seem to shake... sometimes its to do with work and stuff but I found that I don't need as much sleep anymore." he admitted you could see he was uncomfortable so decided not to pursue it you were satisfied for the moment he would tell you when he was good and ready. You grinned at him
"That's a relief I thought it was my snoring that had drove you away" he bellowed a laugh wrapping you up in a strong hug around your hips holding you tightly against him you winced as he pressed against the marks he had left yesterday.
"Baby loosen up a bit would you... hips" you said he immediately loosened his hold pressing his face into your chest giving a fleeting kiss to each nipple making you jump as they to were still tender and slightly swollen from the past few days of his insatiable ministrations. Smirking he brought his hands up rolling them on his palms making you squirm as he dug his face between your breasts licking over deep purple and blue marks he had sucked into your cleavage just as your breathing started to become harsher pants he retreated completly with a smirk as you leaned forward unconsciously then snapped out of what ever lusy haze he had placed on you chuckling with a hard squeeze pushing you away from him lightly patting your bottom.
"Come on you time to get dressed Clark will be here soon for the interview."
"What he's coming today?" Bruce nodded
"Someone took a photo of us the other day its been doing the rounds on the internet and tv but thankfully not a lot has been in the news or magazines yet, Clark's boss heard and has been all over him about it because he knows we know each other so Clark is coming over this morning to do it and get some photos."you gaped at him
"ok what do you mean by not a lot in the news?" he gave you a look
"Bruce? what have they said?" you asked getting a little panicked mind racing with all the possible rumors they could have started. Or worse what if somehow they'd saw you in his office you gasped freaking out as your mind instantly began thinking the worst. He nodded his head to the small side table by the window seeing a news paper Gotham gazette yesterdays copy with two photos of you and Bruce from the incident at the tower. One was from the side showing your profile more than your actual facial features with your hand on his chest trying to calm him down as he spoke to the guard it showed clearly that he was angry with the man, the other was much clearer a face on shot of you both, you tucked into his side as you made your way to the elevators. The headline read 'Billionaire Bae-by' you took a deep breath no one saw what you'd done in the office. Reading the first few lines of the article. They didn't have much info just that someone had gone to the tower and whilst being escorted out Bruce had come down scolded a security guard and secretary then disappeared with the woman, the rest was just contemplating your identity with words like model and personal assistant thrown in here and there. In a way you were flattered. You felt Bruce walk up behind you placing a hand on your back rubbing small circles.
"Are you ok Sweetsq? don't worry everything will be ok. I've already got Mary and security looking into who took those photos it will all be sorted I promise." you snapped out of your hectic thoughts and scoffed throwing the paper back down
"Bae-by really? they get paid to write for a living and that's the best they got? honestly I'm just happy there's not photos of us in the office" he huffed kissing the back of your head
"Well other tabloids have dubbed you the new queen of Gotham, maybe that's more you? personally I'd say princess well after yesterday at least" he wiggled his eyebrows at you when you faced him you almost didn't take the bait but looked soo pleased with himself you couldn't let him down.
"Oh year and why is that?" he swallowed at the look you gave him
"Well your my little pillow princess" he said as matter of fact grinning you gaped at him shifting on your feet.
"Excuse you!! them water jets were powerful I couldn't move you-you fuck!" you growled out stomping away from him making him laugh out loud apologizing as you made your way over to where your bag had been the previous night stopping short.
"Babe wheres my stuff?"
"In here" he said pulling out a drawer in the dresser beside him.
"And some is in the closet your makeup is in the vanity in the bathroom, I didn't like you living out of a bag so had Alfred move it this morning while you slept." you looked stumped at him slightly touched at the implications.
"You didn't have to do that." moving towards him looking in the drawer seeing a majority of the clothes that jack had brought over for you. You grabbed your long royal blue roll neck jumper and black crushed velvet leggings with your undies.
"You best get ready Clark should be here soon" Bruce commented kissing you then making his way to the door
"You never did tell me who he wrote for."
"Oh he writes for the Daily Planet any way I will see you down stairs in a bit" he left as you tried to wrap your head around what was about to happen.'Daily planet?' Now that was a big deal, it was a bit nerve wracking letting everyone see you , know your name and step into the spotlight but at the same time you trusted those around you, and most of all you trusted bruce he wont let you fall. Making your way to the bathroom having a quick shower not washing your hair as Jack didn't bring your hair dryer and you had no idea where Bruce's one was or if he even had one. Slipping out you quickly threw on your outfit before standing before the vanity your small makeup bag on the side.
'do I got full face or light?' you debated you didn't want to slap a ton on your face too much could go wrong yet there was going to be photos. You decided to play safe and do your normal daily make up of eyebrows and eyeliner reassuring yourself that Bruce loves the way you look with of without. You left the room making your way downstairs hearing Bruce and Alfred talking to someone turning the corner you saw a tall broad man with black hair Bruce's face lit up.
"And here she is now Clark this is Y/n my girlfriend, Y/n this is Clark the reporter I was telling you about." Clark turned to face you smiling a dazzling smile his bright blue eyes shone impossibly bright, he was very handsome in the clean cut boy next door way. You nodded smiling shaking Clark's hand.
"Its nice to meet you, Thank you for doing this .. I've got to admit that I'm nervous about all this so you'll have to bare with me." Clark shook his head watching as you and Bruce seemed to have a pull that tugged you towards one another.
"That's no problem Bruce is a friend we go way back, and you have no reason to be nervous I will send you a copy of my article before it prints and will only write what you ask me to, I understand that you have concerns over your younger brother?" you nodded already liking the man he seemed trustworthy.
"Yes I don't really want him to be included to much... for his sake" Alfred interrupted
"I've set up coffee in the front sitting room if you'd like to make your way through." Bruce nodded thanking him and made your way to the room to conduct the interview. Once you were all settled with your drinks Clark began.
"So your Y/n Cooke?" you nodded shyly sitting tight against Bruce
" If you don't mind me asking how old are you?" you cringed waiting for the judgmental scoff as you stated your age.
"25" he nodded not giving any judgmental indications over your age or bringing up the age gap he just wrote down on his note book.
"And how did you meet ?" you were grateful when Bruce answered making the decision of how much to let people know, he had more experience with these things.
"Damien has been having his best friend from school over for a few months who happens to be y/n's younger brother, he couldn't stop gushing over her so I known of her for nearly seven months before meeting her. We actually met at Damien's school just over 3 months ago there was an incident that has since been dealt with but it involved both Damien and Jack." he smiled down at you.
"She came into the waiting area fretting over both of the boys like a mother hen and I was instantly drawn to her, the way she ignored everything around her instead focused solely on making sure they were unharmed and finding out there side of things."
you blushed continuing.
"I was hounded by Damien for months about coming over to meet Bruce but always brushed him off. But I distinctly remember being mortified when met him, I hadn't realized he was there. I sat down and noticed Bruce had been watching me the whole time. Then he backed me up when trying to sort things out with the principle in the office .. I was shocked but very grateful to him." Clark nodded writing everything down as you both recounted your meeting.
"So you met at the school?for a meeting? that's unusual could you elaborate?" you looked to Bruce who grunted at Clark
"Don't push it, there was a few issues the school had..... overlooked shall we say. For some months, Y/n walked in and set them straight. It has now been sorted. I was impressed at how she dealt with it and invited her out to lunch and we have been together since" he explained you relaxed a bit when he skipped the whole avoidance thing. Clark took a sip of his coffee and turned to you.
"So if you don't mind me asking about your brother? your responsible for him"you shifted uncomfortably.
"I-I am err can we not include to much about Jack? please?" you looked from one to the other
"Its ok I wont include to much just weather your his legal guardian, honestly I probably wont include it to much.. its mainyl to give context to why it was you there and not your parents." Bruce froze seeing where this was going. It has only been recently that you'd informed him of how your parents had died and he knew discussing it would cause upset on both sides he gave a growl of warning.
"Clark don't-" you put a hand up stopping him
"I will tell you the circumstances because your a friend of Bruce's but I'd rather you leave the details out is that fair?" Bruce tried to protest but you waved him off.
"Bruce its fine" you said as Clark nodded looking at Bruce strangely he got the feeling that his reaction wasn't just for you, nevertheless he nodded agreeing to your terms.
"My parents went on a day out, having a romantic trip just the two of them whilst Jack was at school, they were visiting the place's that were special to them where they met, first kiss that sort of thing it was for their anniversary. My dad had booked dinner at the restaurant that they got engaged in as a treat ,mum didn't know that bit he wanted to surprise her....they never made it tho...they.... it was the day of the metropolis disaster needless to say they didn't survive. I was away at college at the time. I had just turned 20, I dropped out that day packed my bags and come back home to Gotham and became Jacks legal guardian and have been looking after him since." you took a deep sigh it was five years but it was still fresh in a sense, luckily you had Jack to focus on and you pulled through it all because of him. You had to be strong for him. You will never forget that day tho, you had phoned over and over desperate to here from them hoping that they hadn't gone, you missed all your classes packing , you just had a gut feeling that you had to go home. When you heard nothing you left and was home in less than a day Jack had stayed with a friend that night, it took Four agonizing days but finally they had been confirmed as some of the casualties you broke down. It was just a devastating case of in the wrong place at the wrong time. With everything that happened in those few days looking back on it was still hard. You looked up again and was startled at the look Clark had on his face. His blue eyes darkened it was like a shadow had fallen over him, he looked absolutely devastated, wracked with guilt for some reason.
"I'm sorry... I'm so sorry... if I'd have known I'd-" as he trailed off you looked a little confused then remeberd he was from metropolis he probably would have been there. You smiled softly at him.
"Hey its fine I'm ok Jacks ok, no ones to blame, we all have to go sometime It was there time. but they were together and that is a small comfort" Bruce watched quietly knowing how Clark had felt about the whole incident.
"You don't blame anyone? not even superman?" you tilted your head contemplating before leaning back against the loveseat you and Bruce occupied finally shaking your head.
"No. no I don't.. he didn't ask them to come here and fuck shit up.. not like he sent out an invite.. hell no one did I mean they threatened but nobody really believed that it would actually happen. Including my parents.. why should I blame him... he stopped them and in that respect I see him as someone who saved Jack I mean Gotham isn't that far and would have been gone next jack along with it." Clark gave a stiff nod then moved along quickly.
"So you took on Jack and helped him into the scholarship program at school." you nodded to him happy that he seems less gloomy tho you suspected it was a facade.
"Since the papers yesterday some people have reported seeing you out and about together at a restaurants? and cafes? and stuff " Bruce nodded
"We wasn't to keen on being public at first wanting to see how we go, the the more we saw of one another the more serious it became, so began venturing out more and more."
"And I assume that you've met the rest of Bruce's children?"
"Yes I have I was worried at first especially about meeting Dick and Jason, I thought they would disprove of me and Bruce's relationship because of our ages but I was proved wrong they are happy as long as their dad is happy and have both welcomed me with open arms." Clark jotted a few notes then came to the final question.
"and finally I have to ask about the incident at the tower, witnesses said there was an altercation?" you lowered your eyes and Bruce rubbed your leg reassuringly as you took a sip from your drink letting the cup warm your hands ans tucked your feet up onto the seat as Bruce slung an arm across your shoulders you snuggled under his arm as you leaned back on him before he began speaking.
"I was partly to blame for that"
you scoffed into your cup at him and he cocked his eyebrow at you Clark watched as the couple had a small stare down and was floored as Bruce gave in first.
"What you want to explain?"he asked
"No you go right ahead and see who he thinks was the cause of that cave man" you said gulping down another mouthful of coffee Bruce sighed
"it was my fault" you smiled giving an exaggerated nod. He rolled his eyes at you gripping your knee as you laughed.
"Once I got into the office I saw that I only had 2 meetings and would be finished before lunch so I invited Y/n out to lunch as she had an early finish and I made reservations. I had forgotten to have a pass ready for her at the lobby .When she arrived a member of my lobby staff failed to find her on the systems, they didn't believe that y/n was there to see me and was less than pleasant... honestly they had been extremely rude to her before calling security to have Y/n removed. Luckily I had called when this was happening and came down to sort out the confusion." Bruce explained Clark nodded.
"What happened to the staff member?"
"They are undergoing retraining for the position followed by a probation period but if all goes well they will remain at the company"
"And those are the photos we saw?" you nodded
"That one was when Bruce asked the guard who had put in the call to have me removed and the other was as we made our way to the elevators." Clark looked as you pointed out each one then smiled cheekily.
"The real question is did you make the reservations?" he asked slyly Bruce grunted at him his eyes getting darker glint. you ran a hand along his tense jaw.
"No the incident to longer to sort out as Bruce dealt with the staff involved" Clark finished writing then looked up.
"Well I think that's all, just some photos? then I will write it and send it to you for the ok before printing and hopefully be out tomorrow."
"tomorrow? that's fast" you comment
"yes well its better to get these stories done faster than normal that way we can avoid.... more fictitious articles being printed." he leaned down pulling a slim camera from his briefcase. directing you until you were sitting with your legs tucked up under your self leaning into Bruce under his arm he leaned over whispering curling his arm his hand dancing on your bicep pulling you until you felt him below his shirt smiling as Clark held up the camera ready to take some shots.
"Don't look so nervous" you pouted at him turning your head only for him to catch you by surprise with a sweet kiss you heard the snap of a camera Bruce pulled back and you giggled barely registering another camera snap before you both face towards Clark hearing one final snap.
It was later that day you and bruce were alone im the manor alfred had gone to pick up the boys, currently you were lounging around in the den watching some random film playing on tv when Bruce's tablet chimed signalling he had received an email from Clark the article was done.
"That was quick how'd he even get back to metropolis so fast?" He shrugged
"Well you'd be surprised how fast journalists can move.. especially this one" you let out a breath creeping up behind leaning over the back of the sofa peaking at the emailed attachments as he opend them, there was two attachments the first was a front page draft with a blown up photo of you're and Bruce's kiss with the headline 'Gothams New Power Couple' and a small a note 'Our exclusive first interview with the new couple' then the second page was one large page dominated by a photo of you and Bruce face on, you smiling Bruce smirking at you curled up against him and another smaller one of you giggling up at Bruce. You peaked over his shoulder staring at the tablet smileing.
"I like that photo, the big one on the second page" you stated he looked up at you before returning his gaze
"Yes its a keeper... I will get us some copies" he then motioned for you to sit. You did scurried around next to him waiting patiently.
"I'll read it to you. Ready?. " you nodded
"It is official Bruce Wayne is off the market ,he has finally been tamed! I was lucky enough to be invited to Wayne manor for an exclusive interview of Gothams next power couple and was pleasantly suprised. Mr Waynes new mystery partner is not what anyone would have expected. And I can reveal the woman as Miss Y/n Cooke A bright and polite young woman who is mature despite her young age due to her raising her younger brother for the past few years after her parents sudden passing. The couple could not seem to keep away from one another during our interview stealing glances at one another laughing and full of banter ,gravitated towards each other in a way I've rearly seen as they both recounted how they met then explained that they have been secretly dating for nearly four months. The couple met at Mr Waynes sons school where Miss Cooke's brother also attends. They were both invited to a parental meeting and sparks few instantly resulting in there first date, and they have been dateing ever since, being spotted out together in various locations across gotham the past few weeks in particular building up for a big reveal,most recently being photographed together in Wayne Enterprises in the city. Miss Cooke explaind that the photos arent all what they seemed,she went on informing me that she had been invited on to a lunch date with Mr Wayne only to be stopped by some members of staff and eventualy escorted out by security causeing Mr Wayne to intervene resulting in the photos that have previously been leaked on social media. After interviewing Mr Wayne on serveral occasions this is the first time I have seen him this passionate about anything, I saw during my interview a genuine romance that I believe is destined to be a happy ever after for the billionaire business mogul." You smiled a bit shocked at the way Clark had managed kept his word by skipping details yet still gave the media all the answers they wanted, he'd kept Jack out of it for the most part and also sidelined the issues with the school. All in all you thought it was a clever article. Bruce smiled at you.
"What do you think?" You asked apprehensively not really sure if it was good enough having not done this before. He nodded his head
"He is very clever,thats why i called him he has a way of not given any real indepth information but making it sound like he has. He has given enough to satisfy the media. He was a bit sappy at the end but its his way of saying he is happy for me. So you want to let him print it?" You thought for a second. It was a big step in the relationship. But then again he was doing this for you, so you wouldnt have to hide or be made to feel the way you was at the tower. This was so you could both have the freedom to be a couple anywhere. You grinned at that.
"Yeah I dont have any problems with it, I dont see how I could get to much backlash from it... do you?" He shook his head at you before quickly emailing Clark back that it was fine and asked for copies of all the photos ,he wouldnt admit it to you but his favourite was the photo of you giggling and it was going in his office at work... and a copy was going to make its way in the batcave somewhere. He snapped the case closed on his tablet and threw it on the other side of him pulling you to sit on his lap.
"So tomorrow is the big day then... I cant wait until everyone knows your mine." He growled out kissing your shoulder watching the tv you grinned sarcastically.
"Isnt that supposed to be my line?" You leaned back with a calculating look you tilted your head to kiss under his jaw before biting down then lowered your head biting and kissing at his neck, he continued to ignore you watching tv so you upped the anti he furrowed his brow lightly slowly realising what you was upto when he felt you tightened your ass muscles hissing when you sucked harshly rocking on his lap clenching and unclenghing on him whimpering gripping his muscular forearms you felt him twitch below you an insistent prod on your bottom as you gyrated on him. He looked down lust written across his face.
"Are you really ready for me?" He grumbled you looked at him innocently slowly moving his hands from your inner thighs to your hips. you smiled up at him innocently licking your bottom lip befor biting it.
"the question is Mr Wayne are you ready for me?" he groaned wide eyed as you pushed down harshly feeling managing to wedge him between your cheeks lightly and continueds moving he cried out balls aching as he strained against you quickly found himself fully erect rubbing up against you, spinning you straddled his lap squeezing his waist with your thighs pulling one of his hands to your mouth nipping at his pointer and middle fingers lathering them with kitten licks before sucking on them sharply scraping your teeth lightly over them as you pulled back before you pushed forward keeping eye contact , his eyes traced over your face watching with baited breath as you took them deep into your mouth managing not to gag as they past the back of your mouth then pulled them free leaving a small peck on the tips of his fingers. he gulped feeling lost as you pulled back vey pleased with youself he tilted his head at you clearing his throat.
"wh-what are you doing sweets?" you stood leaning down pulling him by the collar forward leaning in as if to kiss him changing direction at the last secodn to whisper in his ear.
"Me? Nothing, apparently I'm a pillow princess" you said before dodging his reaching hands just skimming you as you ran out of the room laughing all the way. He gave chase making you as you grabbed the stair rail turning tight flinging yourself up them as he followed closely hearing him curse as he his hand thumped the post hard when he copied you. Squealing you tucked your bottom underneath you as you heard him catching up fast as you both climbed the stairs he captured you halfway up the stairs pushing you into the wall kissing you. Making you shiver at his quick tongue licking into your mouth moaning at the taste of his tongue. he pushed you tightly against the wall by your shoulders towering over you growling bringing his hips to yours holding you still intimately.
"You think its wise to tease me baby? you think you wont pay for that?" his words hung in the air as he dived back in kissing you. You broke away with a laugh
"well I don't think I will pay tonight at that's for sure" the front door opened and closed followed by a loud chorus of protests coming from below the four boys were home and looked disgusted.
"You have all day to fuck and you choose to have sex on the main stairs when we come home what is wrong with you?" Tim started
"To be fair she was never like this before.... your dad has corrupted her." Jack countered more exasperated then shocked by this point . Jason piped up next arms behind his head slowly making his way to the den.
"Cant argue, good sex has been known to lead women astray." Damien grunted
"Its disgusting are you trying to soil every room in the house?" He was unimpressed apparently. You turned to Bruce smirking deciding to 'poke the bear' as it were
"Not trying Damien we are succeeding first the manor then the cars right Bruce" he barked out a laugh at the faces his two youngest pulled as they boys began to bitch making you both laugh at them. Alfred entered the room from the kitchen obviously hearing some of the conversation he smiled slyly.
"Which reminds me Master Wayne I've drained the Jacuzzi and will be refilling tomorrow there wasn't enough chlorine for the job and it will be arriving tomorrow morning" you heard footsteps running out of the den.
"YOU FUCKED IN THE JACUZZI!!" Jason screamed sliding to a stop beside his brothers who were frozen wide eyed
"WHEN? I USED THAT LAST NIGHT" you looked sheepish then shrugged
"Sorry Jason.... but if its any constellation it was in the morning so hopefully the filter system had gathered any .....err excess she we say?" he paled then ran past you climbing the stairs.
"like you said good sex can lead women astray" Bruce said kissing your head making you giggle at him blushing.
"Your sick sick people! I need a shower, unless you fucked there to?" Bruce raised an eyebrow at you before teasing the teen some more enjoying this far to much
"Well yours is fine we haven't got to that part of the house yet." Jason pointed threateningly at you both speechless
"I......You ......IT'S ........NO!" then padded off down the hall. You pushed Bruce back making your way down to bottom of the stairs slinging your arms across their shoulders making your way to the den each taking a seat you sat beside Jack
"Soo we had an interview today and tomorrow there will be an article in the daily planet about how we met and such... you have been mentioned but not your name ok? and it dose mention our situation" Bruce entered afterwards taking a seat handing Jack his tablet with the email open.
"Here read it for yourself.... If anything happens or is said you-" he cast you a hesitant glance before continuing.
"You can come to me I'll have it all sorted out ok? the papers might try to approach you for comments and such but it'd be better if you didn't they will try to find a way to twist anything you say.... we're family now and I will look after you both" Jack looked from the email to you then Bruce shocked. He and Bruce have banter much like Bruce and his sons but he had felt like he was baggage to a certain extent. jack was touched by Bruce's words he let a small smile slip before covering it quickly. Giving him an accusing look.
"Family? you better not have proposed ,you need my approval for that first sunshine."
"Jack! you little shit he was being genuine" you cried diving at him knocking you both the the floor as Tim quickly snatched the tablet as you began wrestling around on the rug.
"Say sorry!"
"Fuck no!!"
you continued as the others laughed at your antics.
"No no....y/n...... the chin not the neck... yes there the soft bit..... that's it!"
"OOWW! WHAT THE FUCK? WHY DOES THAT HURT SO MUCH" Jack cried as you followed Damien's suggestion.
"Damien! stop encouraging her!" Bruce ordered. .
"I'm not even going to ask" said an unamused Jason as he swept into the room stepping over you and Jack who were still rolling around locked in a grand battle hair damp from the shower he'd just had. This new family was a bit mad but it was yours and you wouldn't change a thing.
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bitxhmoonrising · 3 years ago
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My ACOTAR Review (sorry if it's not what you expected)
TW for SA AND ABUSE - because for some reason that wasn't something the author felt like they needed to warn people about???
I decided to go ahead and finally read this book. After years of seeing it online, and the mixed reviews, I'm finally going to pick it up and give it a try. (Its just going to be in a point form list)
1. The first four chapters are weird, I have a hard time believing Feyre cannot read when they lost all of the money at 14, she should be able to read. She came from a very rich family, one in which the mother wished to marry off her daughters, and even if she did not like Feyre, education would be an important factor in marrying her off, it means they are wealthy. It's very hard to believe this fact, but I can look past it.
2. The relationship between the sisters is hilarious, it honestly reminds me of my own with my 4 other sisters. We used to call each other smelly and ugly, and said the rudest shit and I liked for once that I saw this in a book. Though, I think the author wanted them to be 'evil', but it just came off as more realistic then anything. And funny, honestly.
2.5 the father is an abusive POS. Clearly these 3 girls have been emotionally abused by both their parents to some extent.
3. I find myself rolling my eyes at her narration, she is very whiny. Hopefully that changes as her character develops or I'm not sure I can stand 5 books of this.
4. Do you expect me to believe, that Feyre would choose Tamlin, WHEN LUCIEN IS RIGHT THERE?!?!?! their relationship is so boring, to the point that I believe they wont end up together because the author was so lazy with it.
5. Tamlin sending Feyre away was probably the best thing he could do for her. I'm actually surprised the man could admit to her that he could not protect her instead of pretending, though Lucien's reaction makes me think there is something bigger about Tamlin's love confession. . (Ok, coming from finishing the book, the reasoning wasn't that climatic). Also, Rhysand can fuck the fuck off, slimy bitch.
6. Ok, Feyre and Nesta 🥺🥺 they are so cute. Though it seems Nesta character has gone through a bit of a change since the first four chapters. Nesta admitting she wasn't capable of taking care of the family like Feyre did such a big thing for her (but like, I'm also on the train that oldest siblings are not parents, because that's toxic thinking imo, and they are close enough in age for it to not bother me, idk.)  Feyre teaching Nesta to paint is so wholesome, it has my heart exploding.
7. Something happened with Tomas and Nesta, it was bad. I just know it. BUT NESTA GOING INTO THE WOODS FOR FEYRE HAS ME WANTING TO FAINT!! THE LOVE SHE HAS FOR HER.
8. I hope we get to see Nesta and Feyre together again at some point, I love their weird relationship. Me and my second youngest sister, who reminds me of Nesta, have a very similar dynamic and I see us in them. There love is one declared through action, not words. It's unspoken.
9. 100 pages of info dump and we are at he mountain.
10. NOT CLARE BEDDOR!! Also, why did Rhys even give the name??? Either the guy is truly evil, or a moron. Thankfully, Tamlin has some sense about him to keep his mouth shut and not let on how much she means to him because this Rice boy would happily fuck them over. I feel like the author is trying to make me like him, but I don't.
11. The answer is love (I'll delete this if I'm wrong).
12. WHY WAS THERE NO TW FOR SEXUAL ASSAULT IN THIS BOOK?!?!?! I DID NOT WANT TO READ THIS!!!! Rhysand can die and I hope he does. The entire drugging and assult scenes were disgusting and hard to read AND THIS IS A YA BOOK!!??!
13. Tamlin has a stone heart????
14. Wtf was this book?
My review
Feyre is ok, nothing I haven't read before. Think she should run away from all these men (including their abusive father) with her sissy's, but she wont. How she cannot see any red flags is beyond me.
Tamlin, meh.
Rhys, gross. Nothing he does makes sense.
Lucien, to good for this world. Must protect at all costs.
Rating: 3/5 because I wasn't horrible. Will still read second book.
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sableu3 · 4 years ago
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Day 66
100 Days of 100 Prompts
Clarke is 4 months pregnant when Roan captures her and brings her to Lexa. She agrees to the summit for her people and when Bellamy barges in and asks her to come home, she takes him aside to explain that someone needs to stay to make sure Lexa holds up her end of the deal. Bellamy says Kane can stay but SHE needs to come home and be with her people. Clarke agrees because of her pregnancy but decides she wont tell him it’s his unless he asks.
She is able to stop Pike’s rebellion, Or at the very least save the warriors until Pike is captured.
No Jaha city of light bullshit either. Maybe hes just handing out drugs or something or nothing at all. (I’m completely ignoring alie)
Lexa gets the coalition under control, Kane stays in Polis as ambassador, Emerson gets delivered to Wanheda at Arkadia and without the entire coalition looking on and trying to emulate the whole ‘blood must not have blood’ thing, she has him executed. She was hesitant but Bellamy pointed out that he would stop at nothing to hurt them and they couldn’t risk it after he blew up the mountain. He knew enough tech to sneak in and destroy some of their systems and like a rabid dog, he needed to be put down for the safety of others. It wasn’t about revenge at that point. She agrees.
Clarke has effectively seized power and imprisoned Pike for crimes against the coalition. She has also imprisoned his most loyal which includes Monty’s mother. Some of the arkers aren’t happy with this since she wasn’t elected and this isn’t how they did things on the ark so Clarke reminds them that this isn’t the ark, they are on the ground now, they are part of something bigger than just them. It isn’t just the ark and their rules anymore but the entire coalition that must be taken into account. If Skaikru doesn’t follow the laws of the coalition they will be eliminated. They are the ones who listened to a zealot and elected him into power. They would have suffered along with him when the rest of the coalition turned on them for betraying the alliance. They can either continue to fight against the peace treaty and be ejected and banished from Arkadia or they can accept the new way of life and live peacefully and try to get along with the grounders, that they aren’t all bad.
She understands that some of them had a horrible experience, the 100 did as well, but they need to learn to move on and understand that not all grounders are like that. If you want to hate someone, hate Azgeda, whose territory you landed in and who attacked you so brutally. However, some clans are peaceful, some are fisherman, some are artists and weavers, some are farmers. She tries to humanize the grounders to them.
Perhaps later her and Bellamy will make plans to bring in a few diplomatic groups.
In the mean time, he is still healing from Gina’s death and hasn’t noticed her growing bump. To be fair, it isn’t that noticeable yet and her symptoms are rather mild. Another month goes by and she is past the five month mark when he finally takes note of it. He is stunned and staring at her midsection before looking up at her to confirm what he thinks he’s seeing.
She nods and tells him that apparently her implant failed. He asks why she didn’t tell him earlier and she says she didn’t want to add another thing for him to stress about, she’s fine. But he isn’t stupid and hesitantly, unsure if he wants to know the answer, he asks if she would have ever told him. She knows he’s asking if she would have told him he was the father if he hadn’t figured it out. She hesitates but admits that it would have depended on their relationship at the time. They still had things to work through.
They’ve been working together out of necessity so far, needing to put up a united front for the arkers. But Bellamy still has some issues with her leaving him behind and while some of them have healed with her return home, not all of them have. He needs to learn to trust her again and that he can lean on her again. Right now however, he needs her to learn to lean on HIM again. He swallows hard and accepts her answer. They only had one night together after all, it’s not like they were in a relationship.
So Bellamy starts paying more attention to her in general and starts to really forgive her for leaving. Some of the others start to notice his increased attention and make assumptions, not all of them would be wrong either.
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