#she pawnch

[ucami]

HAPWA!!

[oc: angelette]

[whooiew]

-Beeg Pawnch-

Kafka Doodle where she does Beeg Pawnch

[nikofortuna]

JTTW Chapter 6 Thoughts

Chapter Six for the @journeythroughjourneytothewest Reading Group!

Starting things off with another look at how time is accounted for in Heaven. Last time I concluded that the years that the Immortal Peach Trees need to grow their fruits were Earth years. This time around when they say that the Peach Festival happens every year they do mean a full year in Heaven, so multiple hundred years on Earth. It kind of has to be this way otherwise things would make little sense since if it wasn’t so the festival would be every day in Heaven and then they’d run out of Immortal Peaches really quickly even without a monkey eating them all up.

This chapter Heaven is back on with its nonsense, this time in retelling what happened instead of their actions. They most certainly did not “educate and nurture the talented monkey”, they didn’t actively teach him anything outside of maybe the bare minimum Sun Wukong was told by the people he worked with. They didn’t even tell him how the ranking system works!

Also they totally denied that he beat Nezha.

What becomes clear here as well is that they didn’t even pay Sun Wukong when they did give him the job to look after the garden. Sure it’s not like the Monkey King would have cared much, but that’s still not a good move.

We stan Guanyin, my favourite Bodhisattva, for sending her own disciple down to the battlefield for specifically a factual report. I firmly believe she is seeing through the nonsense the Jade Emperor has woven in with the truth in his recounting of events!

Also she is already saying “our [monkey]” like she has already decided to sort of take him under her wing. My speculation here is that she probably listened up when it was mentioned vaguely that Sun Wukong cared for his monkeys.

When Erlang Shen enters the fray some rather interesting points arise. For one his sworn brothers, who must know him very well, said that there was no time for “praise or blame”. Oho, what could they mean with praise? In the J.F. Jenner translation they even say "Stop admiring him and challenge him to battle.", which after taking a look at the original Chinese put through Google Translate is actually more accurate.

All of this is very interesting. Perhaps it is meant to harken back to Erlang’s own story and his troubles with Heaven, so now some appreciation for Sun Wukong being rather likeminded in this instance shines through. Aside from both of them having a rebellious streak, another parallel is that both of them have a brotherhood of seven!

And then of course Sun Wukong things of him as being very pretty. I can certainly see why people appreciate those two together.

Additionally Sun Wukong doesn’t want to fight him, because he appreciates his care for his mother! Aside from them not having any personal issues with each other.

Interestingly the Jingu Bang is always metaphorically called a Dragon in multiple instances of combat while the opponent’s weapon is referred to as Phoenix.

Some more translation shenanigans Erlang’s face is not simply green as stated in the Anthony C. Yu translation! I checked the Chinese text with the help of Google Translate for the Pinyin again and it’s verdant, so it could be more blue or green or inbetween even. The colour is specifically [青 Qīng], which doesn’t specify if it’s green or blue, just that it’s verdant. Only if an additional character had been used it could have been clearly differentiated. The German translation actually calls it “grünblau” literally greenblue as well.

Yippie, Xiàotiān makes an appearance this chapter as well! Wish we could have seen more of the good boi, but maybe we’ll get more later at some point. For those who’d like to see more of her, I can happily refer to the New Gods: Yang Jian movie!

She’s so goofy, so adorable! Yet still packs a pawnch as well.

Guess why Erlang is called Little Sage in this! The German translation notes that it is because Erlang [二 郎] has the number two [二] in it, which stands for the force of Yin with which the small/little is associated. So it’s Little Sage in the chapter title! Additionally Sun Wukong has a lot of Yang force, which gets opposed and undermined by Erlang’s Yin.

Lastly the Audio Drama Production Notes of this chapter bringing forth that the “plant-headed deities” in the Anthony C. Yu translation, well, have nothing to do with plants at all. Instead something they could be called which is more true to the intended meaning is “unappointed deities”.

And that should be the last we see of Huaguoshan until about… Chapter 28! Good grief, I’m not ready.

[arsenicfathips]

:33< @empiricalsagipia *af rolls ofur onto her back and purroudly displays her recently filled pawnch*

:33< furtunately fur mew widening is quite common on my end! x33c

:33< *the lioness sticks her tongue out playfurry and she bats at the bumps that show up on her tummy*

:33< so youll have a lot to look furward to h33h33

[thegoddamnowl]

Magma! PAWNCH!

She's gonna break your face if you look at her funny. Another one of the commissions I got a while ago

[nekofantasia]

How would Chen hold up against a FALCON PAWNCH?

She would hold against one just fine! It would not knock her out but she appreciates the boom that comes with it!

[boobachu]

Cammy watches Konosuba ep 5

"Where's the partner I'm supposed to fall in love with?!" I'm sorry there's no men here Neetboy.

Aqua's a teabag!

Oh God not a wetting yourself fetish.

Where are the alligators? There they are!!!!

PURIFICATION!! PURIFICATION!! PURIFICATION!! PURIFICATION!!

That's the face of a long day's work.

Oh God Aqua's traumatized.

Oh dang someone else was iseckied.

She won't come out.

oh boy

agrnjkahrsgj she sure perked up as soon as she was told she was a goddess LOL

sr,mgnkajsrgniopewrajgoijaerg

He challenged Neetboy to a duel and he just "READYsetGO" and just steals his stupid sword.

I dunno WTF

Oh God whatshisface is ready for round 2 cuz he learned Neetboy steals panties and he's

AGUA PAWNCH!!!

skjdfnjksnfkj THEY SOLD THE SWORD HE WAS GIFTED BY AQUA?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!??!

Oh the demon-knight is back cuz I guess someone keeps blowt up the place I duno

It's a fun show but it's also like... kind of a waste of time...

[ethilite]

Blair Alexander ~ A Playlist [ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ]

“I mean, if all else fails, I can always use my fists.”

Destiny Islands | Sparkling Tides | New Horizon | Eventide | Kung Fu’d | Windfall | Reach for the Stars | Nekozilla | Dragon Roost Island | Magikarp Festival

[pantrypurrloiner]

*The anon crawls up her body, resting their head on her breasts as they pat her head and scratch her ears.* That's why I want you to eat me, huntress. I cannot live in a world that won't worship you when you digest it. If Paradox Space were sane, you could simply lay here in the sun while hordes of eager prey slid themselves down your throat. Karkat would relish his life as your seat beneath your ever fattening ass while your friends worship your belly and eagerly gossip about which of them will be next to feed you. Just head pats, belly rubs, and squirming prey forever~

:33< mnaaaaaaaayn~

:33< *it would appear at first that the fearsome purredator was merely yawning, but her already-impressive gape only widened the longer she held it! slimy strands of saliva hung between tongue and palette, her fishy breath wafting out into the anon's face... until she tipped the anon furward and suckled their head into her mouth! slurping around their features, she purrrumbled into their ears, letting them know just how much she appreciated this willing snack! with a firm gulp, they were pulled halfway down her throat, and with one more they were banished to her tummy, which gurgled powerfully but passively, a very satisfied tummy indeed! she patted her pawnch and the anon curled inside, and yaaaawned~*

:33< hwaaaah, wish furfilled, as is my stomach right about now! your qu33n accepts this willing sacrifice to her belly! now rub, wiggle, and fatten my hips, goodly anon!

[incorrectsmashbrosquotes]

Hi can I have more Ganonkids shenanigans please? They're hilarious and I love them-

Hapi: So... how do I do this Falcon Punch thing again?

Cpt. Falcon: First off, it won’t be a Falcon Punch. That’s trademarked. It’ll be your own take on the punch!

Joker: I’ve got my Phantom Punch. dad’s got his Warlock Punch, you’ll have yours.

Hapi: Oooookayy... does Chara have one?

Chara: *pulls out knife* I don’t need it.

Hapi: Breezing past that, how do I do it?

Cpt. Falcon: The best way I can explain it... you’ve gotta clench your buttcheeks, suck in a breath, and LET IT RIP! FALCON PAWNCH! *Falcon demonstrates*

*Hapi sucks in a breath, closes her eyes, and tries it out. But nothing happens*

Hapi: Well that’s disappointing.

Cpt. Falcon: Well yeah, you’ve gotta clench your cheeks!

Joker: Well... try to think of something that makes you angry. The Ganonfamily punch comes from a place of passion!

Hapi: Yeeeaaah, I’m not good with that stuff.

Chara: Come on. This is your chance to go ape shit! Just... think of something that pisses you off.

*Hapi closes her eyes and thinks... and an image of Cornelia comes to mind. Her eyes snap open, rage filling them, and she sucks in a breath, clenches her cheeks, and-*

Hapi: BANSHEE PUNCH!

*Hapi fires of a punch, wreathed in black flames that take the shape of snapping jaws.*

Cpt. Falcon: Hell yeah!

Joker: That’s the way!

Chara: Congratulations. You’ve pleased the Neanderthals. 

Hapi: Heh. Damn. guess I am part of the family.

[officialburtcurtis]

Ghosty is fighting somebody. She is epicly pawnching them

“Is she winning- Wait I mean, uh tell her not to do that.”

[true-strike]

I got a tough one. Wild card: pawnch or keek?

She is definitely all about the keek.

[hundredsunny]

I SCREMED WHEN I SAW UR POST ABOUT CHAZ, CAN CHAZ BE MY DAd. i just really fuckin love him??? I just wanna give him a hug tbh. I can feel all the love u put into ur children and i love it!!!!!! I'm really curious about his relationship with Jo!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA im so happy u love him too!!!!!! chaz will gladly father u just go to bed on time and eat ur vegetables and there wont b a problem and YES pls hug chaz 

CHAZ AND JO? CHO??? JAZ???? oh fuck i love it i love jaz thats it thats their combined name YA LIKE JAZ? anyways heres how their relationship is:

chaz + jo: jo is chaz’s closest friend. she understands him better than everyone else and knows how to talk to him whenever hes feeling out of it. basically serves as his anchor. jo is just. a queen. she knows how to take care of everyone. i love her. she teases chaz a lot, but she claims it’s bc of a “nagging younger sister instinct”. they both care about each other SO much oh my god. they fight SO well together too. jo’s intellect and chaz’s strength put together makes a very feared force. like??? yall dont even know. jo is the SMARTEST person in the league and chaz is the STRONGEST and wowowowowoow. chaz picks on jo sometimes bc she is A) shorter than him and B) “a nerd”. jo always punches chaz on the left shoulder when he picks fun at her. always the left shoulder. “you might as well just get my fist tattooed on that shoulder”. theyre not light punches either she’ll just FALCON PAWNCH that shit. chaz likes to be organized but hes not as organized as he thinks he is so jo is always stepping in making everything for him like schedules and mission assignments and shit. a true goddess. they bicker like an old married couple, hence why jack always calls them “mom and dad”. they both serve as such positive influences in each other’s lives, and they would be completely different if they never had met each other. i just. jo calls out chaz on his bs when he gets too pissy and/or overreacts and it’s not a good friendship unless u can call each other out for being dickwads. shes always giving him pep talks. lecturing him like a grandma. sometimes theyll sit in silence together for HOURS, that’s just how comfy they are with each other. a v strong bond. cain is why they met so thank u cain. like jack, chaz gets v worried when he cant access jo easily during missions. he gets so freaked out he doesnt wanna lose another important person :( ALSO!!! chaz always hypes jo UP when she goes on missions. “jo’s about to demolish hopes and dreams with that sharpshooting atta girl” “yes jo go murder a bitch or twelve” “you fire that gun girl you fire that gun” i love it

[ayyymeric]

blood-of-the-dragons replied to your post: i just want someone to love mei as much as i do...

100/10 very good girl

she just want to pawnch and blow shit up

[scarletdestruction]

In comes a racing driver with a punch that produces flame in the shape of a bird! FALCON.... PAWNCH!

“That’s cute.” and she just...took it, easily.

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: Avengers #158: When Avengers Clash!

April, 1977

What is not immediately evident is that we are facing another change in the creative team.

Steve Englehart was kicked off the book after #150. After that, Gerry Conway took over with an assist by Jim Shooter in #151 and #156. With this issue, Jim Shooter takes over until #177, a little after he becomes Editor-in-Chief.

And its another rough transition.

I don’t actually remember being a huge fan of Shooter’s Avengers on my first read through so I’ll see if that holds up. But in this issue at least, we get off to a semi-rocky start.

Last time: Wonder Man came back to life, causing non-ending angsts in the Vision right when he was feeling good about himself and his capacity for emotions. Also, a metaphor in the shape of a stone statue of Black Knight beat up the team but punched itself to death against Vision.

This time: Some continuity hiccups.

We start off with the Vision staring moodily, as he is wont to do, but specifically at the broken statue of Black Knight.

The heap of broken statue is a lot more recognizable as specific body parts then it was last time but it does make for a more striking visual. Also, Statue Knight is staring into my soul and its not okay.

Wonder Man walks into the room supporting Scarlet Witch, both in costume. Which is one of those continuity hiccups because they were both already in the room in a pile of defeated heroes and also not in costume.

So I have to believe that they left while Vision was ‘fighting’ Statue Knight specifically to get changed and then came back, instead of helping.

But seeing Wonder Man supporting Wanda is just too much for Vision. He angrily announces that because of Wonder Man he has already relinquished his foolish delusions of humanity and will soon relinquish his wife BECAUSE A ROBOT HAS NO RIGHT TO ONE but hey until he does, hands off.

And then he punches Wonder Man for copping a friendly demeanor.

Also, I notice he hasn’t consulted Wanda with this. Which just goes to show that maybe he’s the most human of all because real human men similarly disregard her emotions and wants and needs.

Its a wonder she didn’t murder them all sooner.

Anyway, so now they’re fight.

Even though Wonder Man was knocked out by a mailbox last time, it will take more than a single punch and also SOLAR BEAM to take him down this time. He’s apparently getting his strength back and also he’s tired of getting knocked out by cheap shots so much.

He tries to tackle Vision but, y’know, intangible.

Except Vision apparently has the human emotion of shit talking because he decides that he’ll humble Wonder Man on his own terms instead of just remaining untouchably intangible.

Of course, even if he’s diamond hard, Wonder Man can just knock him off his feet by attacking the ground.

Its fine, Tony will pay for it.

Speaking of the cool exec with a heart of steel, he comes to underneath the computer bank that Black Knight tipped over on top of him.

Because apparently Shooter skimmed the previous issue?

Because Iron Man was one of the heap of heroes that should already be in the room where Wonder Man and Vision are fighting.

But I’ll try not to harp on it too much.

Back to the fight where Vision continues to ignore Wanda’s desires by exchanging blows with Wonder Man even as she insists that they cut it out.

I guess he gets tired of punching a fellow tough customer about the chest because he tries to go for his insta-win sure fire finishing move and fists Wonder Man through the chest.

But Wonder Man is able to resist the pain and punches Vision in the face.

He’s not the only one that the sure fire fizzled on but I think it usually just doesn’t work at all rather than ‘I say that hurts like the dickens -pawnch-’

The rest of the heroes that should already be in the room show up and Scarlet Witch begs one of them to stop this nonsense.

But Iron Man goes “Let’s just let them fight it out!” but stops just short of suggesting they bet on the outcome.

Tony. Geez. I know they have to work out their issues but a) this is probably not the most productive way? and b) they’re liable to cause a lot of damage to your home before they finish.

Okay. I know the theory is that they have to get it out of their system but guess what? IT DOES NOT WORK. They have this exact same fight again during the Busiek era and eventually have to use their words to clearly express what their thoughts and feelings are, instead of their fists. Because frequently, words work better than fists in the very specific field of robo-angst.

In one of the few times its a disadvantage to be a robot instead of an ionically enhanced human, Vision’s solar batteries are running low while Wonder Man is just getting fired up.

In desperation, Vision drains his solar batteries even faster by using SOLAR BEAM right at Wonder Man’s face.

It’s SUPER EFFECTIVE!

But even though this apparently hurt worse than anybody ever hurt him before (even worse than dying!), Wonder Man has enough juice to BWA-AM Vision.

And now that both heroes have knocked the shit out of each other and are too shaky on their feet to continue, now Iron Man tells them to cut it out.

And now that he has only now decided it was a problem, he scolds Wonder Man for breaking the mansion even though he’s a guest.

Oh and he also tells Vision to act like a man or man-shaped robot instead of a child. Or you’re grounded, mister.

And now that the fight is over, Jarvis shows up to make them all feel bad. He also took the time after waking up from a stone cold beating to put on some fresh clothes but also he fielded an emergency call and told them they were shit out of luck because the Avengers were dealing with personal biz.

Also, are they expecting him to sweep up the stone gentleman or should he call a morgue?

Jarvis’ ploy, if it were that and I’m not simply making up motives, works. Because Iron Man can’t believe that they’ve gotten to the point where they’re turning people away to wallow in their own troubles.

Which might but then again might not be fair. How long did you watch Vision and Wonder Man punch each other?

Before that they were unconscious because a statue beat them up and before that it was Christmas damnit. Can’t they have just one quiet day?? Also, is it still Christmas? They never mention it again. I think they were unconscious through the entire holiday.

But, yeah, obviously just sitting back and watching Vision and Wonder Man beat each other up instead of literally any other thing was a bad decision and you should feel bad, Iron Man.

Meanwhile, we finally get to the plot of the issue.

Because apparently! Vision and Wonder Man’s tension coming to a head? Wasn’t enough of a plot!?

I’d usually discuss this at the end but here goes:

This issue, if it was going to have Vision and Wonder Man punching each other in the head because of Vision’s poor ability to both communicate and deal effectively with his emotions, should have been just about that.

And if the fight was only going to be part of the issue before moving onto something else, that something else should have been thematically connected. As it is, this issue feels disjointed.

It feels like Shooter felt obliged to wrap up this plot thread before moving onto stuff he’d rather write about.

And dang will I have small, mostly neutral comments to say about the stuff Shooter would rather write about. Later. After we’ve seen a couple examples.

So the plot happens in Canada because Marvel Canada is a fascinatingly terrible den of evil, worse than a thousand Mos Eisleys. Specifically a research community in the Canadian Rockies called Research City because scientists are bad at naming the things, some of the times.

And the worst scientist has taken over this research hamlet (it has fewer than ten buildings, it is not a city).

Frank Hall.

And he is nettled because one of the other scientists has disobeyed orders and tried to contact the outside world and request the Avengers’ help.

That is not how we do in Research Commonwealth, JOSEPH.

Just for that, Frank Hall is taking the entire community off the map. TRY TO SNEAK OUT NOW, JOSEPH.

And then he crushes Joseph with kirby krackle.

Not to death but enough that Joseph’s wife Judy begs Frank Hall to stop hurting him.

Frank does not take it well. He gets some real squinty eye face going on for reasons that will be revealed later. But he doesn’t kill Joseph. Just has him taken away and locked up.

Because he just had a wonderful, awful idea.

Which is him beating up the Avengers.

He just now realized that he could become a supervillain instead of being a tinpot bully dictator of a small research community.

...

Frank Hall has sort of limited ambitions considering his scope of power.

Also, he forces Judy to make him a supervillain suit.

Its not specified whether she made it to his exact specifications or spitefully made it to make him look like a prat but he kinda does.

Oh also his backstory: It is every backstory ever about a scientist fucking up science so hard that he becomes a supervillain.

Except slower.

He was working on a teleport beam, doubled the power to see what would happen, and accidentally gave himself gravity powers.

Instead of immediately going megalomaniacal, he at first used his powers to throw stuff at people’s heads. Because, as mentioned, Frank Hall is a petty prick.

But then people started to shun him, because he kept throwing stuff at their heads.

So he proved their impressions of him correct by seizing control over the entire not-city and pushing people around.

And that’s why Frank Hall, Graviton, is the worst.

Also, he’s an entitled, harassing bastard.

Remember how he got angry that Judy didn’t want Joseph to be hurt? It was because he decided that he deserves her. Because she’s his fave.

She’s a bit distracted even though he’s all touching up on her face though because behind his back she noticed the Avengers standing outside the window watching this whole thing with evident disgust.

So she does the thing that everyone does in such a situation and unconvincingly goes “tell me more” but Frank Hall is an entitled idiot bastard and falls for it.

Not that it matters.

Because another woman, Raquel, who was jealous of Judy, bursts in and announces that the Avengers are RIGHT BEHIND YOU.

And the gig is up so the Avengers dramatically fly through the window.

(Attack instead of Assemble? Whats the deeeeeal??)

Things immediately go to hell.

Graviton smashes Vision into the ground with gravity and then blows the rest of the Avengers away with anti-gravity. Because sure.

Vision increases his mass to max mass to max his muscles but Graviton just makes him weightless and flings him through the roof.

Clearly, it is time to pull out the big gun.

Cap readies his mighty shield because he knows that when he flings his mighty shield all who oppose his shield must yield. But Graviton saw through that ploy and increase the mass of the shield.

Now Cap is opposing the mighty shield and must yield. By getting crushed.

Although what kind of posture were you in, Cap, where your shield getting super heavy all of a sudden made you fall backwards with it on top of you instead of just dropping it?

Meanwhile, Judy tries to run away because honestly, wouldn’t you? And Raquel beans her in the back of the head with a vase maybe. Because Raquel is not a great person. Also, this will be important later.

Iron Man and Scarlet Witch attempt to blast Graviton but he just... gravities the floor up so that it blocks the... attack...

I don’t think Graviton knows what gravity is.

He says he made the section of the floor lighter than helium so that it would rise up to protect him but. It was still connected to other floor that was not lighter than helium.

Also, remember when Scarlet Witch’s powers had evolved so she had control over natural forces.

Bet those would come in handy here instead of just shooting generic energy. Alas. The thread has been lost.

Anyway, Graviton condenses some floor fragments into a super-dense sphere and hucks it at the two heroes.

Because armor is better than not armor in this scenario, Iron Man shields Scarlet Witch from the sphere but they both get knocked out anyway.

Although at least her head is still head shaped and not salsa.

Wasp and Yellowjacket try their patented and recently useless Fly Around While Tiny And Annoy Someone battle technique but Graviton knocks them out with a pencil.

It sure is exciting watching those two consistently be useless. =\

Finally, since its just the two of them left, Beast and Wonder Man rush Graviton together but he just drops the ceiling on them. While boasting about how he wishes there were more Avengers because of how easy this is. Womp womp.

Anyway the Avengers are now all defeated. Even Vision. Who we last saw crashing through the ceiling while weightless and also at his maximum density so something like that shouldn’t be enough to knock him out?

Maybe the ceiling was made of mailbox.

And okay. This kind of stomp happens to the Avengers sometimes and with increasing frequency in the near future. But at least Graviton’s backstory had him dicking with his powers for a while before using them in a fight.

Imagine how embarrassing it would be if he were pulling off this kind of nonsense after having just woken up from a coma and never practicing his powers.

Anyway, now nothing can stop him probably and he’ll rule the world possibly.

And Raquel smugly thinks that she’ll rule it at his side because she has some issues she needs to work though.

Next time: More of this. YOU’LL NEVER BELIEVE HOW GRAVITON IS DEFEATED probably.

Hey, you should follow @essential-avengers. Why? When I get twenty followers, I’ll do a bonus post where I look at some Alternate Avengers. Avengers from the future? From when mangas roamed the Earth? Or from an alternate universe? Up to you!