#she needs so many hugs

[wexhappyxfew]

have not posted any individual pieces focused on francis montez, resident co-pilot of silver bullets, but she’s been on my mind as of late because (1) relationships between pilots and co-pilots mean everything to me, (2) going from cpt birdie faulkner to lt annie bradshaw after birdie’s harrowing loss has been traumatizing for her and (3) she feels the only person that understands her for some reason is a certain tail-gunner who does quite a lot of staring (and her name is marianne salinger)

[olliegolliegee]

this is my friend

but she's a girl

she's been trying to conversion therapy herself

send virtual help for her internalized homophobia

men will say “something horrible is happening inside of me and i don’t know why” and the something in question is just being gay

[amberluvsbugs]

How often do you hug mommy long legs ( btw love your drawings

[technicolourtelevision]

gerri doesn't owe roman shit

[anachronismstellar]

SQH: "Why am I blushing???" in the 12/12 au

Oh yea, time for the charmer to be charmed~

---------

There were flowers on Shang Qinghua's desk.

That by itself would be odd, but the fact that there were flowers on his desk and no one knew where they came from was odd and suspicious.

"So you are telling me that you spent the entire day on your post, but you haven't seen who put the flowers on my desk," he turned around to stare at a very flustered Ye Ling that kept apologizing as she bowed so deep her face almost hit the ground.

"This one will accept any punishment Shizun deems fit," she repeated for the nth time, breaking Shang Qinghua's heart enough to pet her head.

"It's... I won't say is fine because is a little bit concerning that someone could get here so easily," he said as he forced himself to stop petting her until tears vanished from her eyes. "But maybe it was for the best. Anyone capable to do such thing would be a little above your pay grade."

"Should I throw them away?" She asked after drying her face with her sleeves, still pouting. Aaah don't be so harsh on yourself, Ye Ling!! This old man's heart can't take it being mean to you!!

"Don't worry about it, better if you don't touch it. I'll ask for Shen Qingqiu to take a look, lets be safe than sorry."

And it turned out that the flowers weren't poisonous or aphrodisiac, just very beautiful and rare. It drove Shang Qinghua to madness trying to figure out who could have sent them, but there was no note or spiritual signature to investigate. It was if a ghost had placed the vase there and then puff! Gone. And to make matters worse-

It happened again.

"Okay, now we might have to start panicking."

"If shizun allows this one to speak freely," Ye Ling scratched the side of her nose, eyebrows frowning like a cute bunny. "The first ones weren't dangerous. And this hair pin... I recognize the craft, is from a nice lady a few towns away from here, I know her and she is completely harmless. Maybe shizun- uh..."

"What?" he squawked when she flushed while giggling like a mad woman, or worse yet, like a high schooler trading secrets during sleep overs. "What?!"

"Looks like Shizun got himself a secret admirer," she spoke so fast he almost didn't catch what she had said. The thought by itself was laughable. Him? Bland as white rice Shang Qinghua? These types of nonsense happened to Shen Qingqiu or or or Liu-shidi! It must be a joke, someone messing up with him to laugh at his face later, it could only be it!

Oh Heavens, why am I blushing, he though as he rubbed both hands all over his face, definitely not thinking of frosty blue eyes and a jaw sharp enough to cut glass as he pressed his fingers over his eyes so hard he saw stars.

"That's it, this nonsense ends now!" And he ignored the way his voice went a little higher than normal, putting his foot down. "Ye Ling, send for Gao-shidi, I'll need his help to put an array on my office.

"Yes, Shizun."

"And if anyone asks for me, check the list, if they are not there reschedule the meeting. I think I'll work on my private quarters today."

"Of course, Shizun. Anything else?"

Shang Qinghua send her off with a wave and a shake of his head, thanking the Heavens once more for his head disciple. Poor girl had to deal with so much nonsense from him and the other peaks, he should get her a nice gift after next peak lord meeting.

"If I survive until then, ahahah... haha... Fuck."

He could only rest after the array had been set up. Then came the boring part, waiting for his... Admirer to be caught. He didn't like waiting, forever a millennial at heart with a very small attention spam, but it didn't mean he wasn't good at it. He had patience, specially when his life was at risk.

He had been careful over the past years, writing important information in code and hiding between nonsense erotica. However, his paranoid ass couldn't help but hate the fact that someone was able to get so close to his papers without him not knowing how.

So imagine his surprise when, even after all his traps and tricks, another gift was waiting for him on his desk, this time a beautiful set of brushes with a matching wet stone, crafted in such dark stone that it looked as if made of void and stars.

What?? The actual fuck???

"Oh, he went with the brush set then," Shen Qingqiu's voice right behind him made Shang Qinghua jump high enough it was a miracle he didn't get stuck on the ceiling. He had totally forgotten the other peak lord was there for their monthly budget meeting.

"W-What?" he asked as soon as Shen Qingqiu words downed upon him. "Shen-Shixiong knows who is sending me these?"

The loud snap of a fan opening told everything Shang Qinghua needed to know. That and the way Shen Qinggiu avoided his eyes, picking up the wet stone and admiring it as if it was the most fascinating object he had seen in years.

"Shixiong," Shang Qinghua insisted, taking a step forward so he could be shoulder to shoulder to the other man. "Shixiong, please, this has driving me insane for the past month, there's important information all over my office, I need to know-"

"You're so dramatic," Shen Qingqiu scoffed with a roll of his eyes, but still he wasn't looking at Sheng Qinghua, slowly putting the wet stone down. "Do you really think Yue Qingyuan would not know about such a breach on our barriers? And do you really think he wouldn't do anything to stop it?"

The logic slapped Shang Qinghua on his face so hard he might as well gotten transmigrated again to a parallel reality. Because if Yue Qingyuan knew, and Shen Qingqiu knew, then it wasn't so far fetch to assume that Wei-Shixiong knew, which meant-

"Is this someone I know?!"

And thank Heavens Shen Qingqiu and Mobei-jun would never ever get to meet each other because if Shang Qinghua ever became the target of their glares combined he wouldn't be able to survive.

"For such a smart man, Shidi, you do seem to forget to put your brain to use," Shen Qingqiu said slowly, rolling his eyes once more at Shang Qinghua's blank stare. "It's the peak lords, Shidi. They are the ones sending you gifts. The Huan Hua feast is approaching, and you have an extra invite, yes?" and it kinda made Shang Qinghua want to pop Shen Qingqiu's eyes with a spoon for him to be speaking so slowly as if Shang Qinghua were a toddler, but- He kinda deserved.

"Oh, so they are- what? Trying to seduce me to get a date?" and he laughed, expecting Shen Qingqiu to give his usual sensible chuckle, freezing when it never came. "You can't be serious!"

"Oh, Shidi," Shen Qinggiu patted his shoulder with his fan, shaking his head in pity. "How can you be so blind is beyond me." and then he made himself comfortable on the chair in front of Shang Qinghua's desk. "One can lead a man to the answer, but can’t make him think. Come, you dragged me all this way for a reason besides your lack of awareness, correct?"

And Shang Qinghua could feel his brain whirring, the sensation of understanding on the tip of his fingers, only to vanish again, like fog in the morning.

Or that video of the cute racoon washing cotton candy on a puddle.

"Riiight," he said with a shake of his head, letting the matter rest. If the other peak lords wanted to play games instead of asking him for the extra invite he wouldn't fry his brain on it. He had other stuff to worry about, like dealing with a very snarky peak lord that thought their gold grew on bamboo trees.

-------

For those who had never seen the racoon video, here it is!

Sharp as a marble our dear Shang Qinghua, may his turn with the brain cell arrive soon sdafhuasidhfusdahf

Just joking, he is smart!!! ..... For sect stuff and spying, but romance and courting??? When is about himself??? poor dear skipped his turn on the brain distribution line.

Aaaaa sorry it took me the entire day, my body decided to punish me for the past days of stress and hfuiasdhfiuasd yea

I hope you liked and thank you so much for the prompt!! :D

[frznkingdom]

Gale only nodded silently in response.

"She's so mean. Sh-she called me filthy. And a b-bunch of other mean stuff..."

She was no stranger to such things, unfortunately, due to her time in the streets of Mantle. And yet, this time it hurt the most.

"She tried to push me away. Why doesn't she like me...?" Gale got along well with so many other people. Why not the woman who brought her into this world? "What did I do?"

"Who, sweetheart?" He wraps his arms around her and pulls her close. Can't really shield her from that kind of hurt with his body, but he still tried, if only by a mindless reflex.

Then it him. "Do you mean the woman that gave birth to you?"

He bit his lips for a short moment to not call that bitch anything that could possibly hurt his daughter.

[aroaceleovaldez]

i think a lot about how Leo didn't use his cabin on the Argo II, and instead just always slept in the engine room or on deck (or let's be real, probably in the walls once or twice). And how Nico and Reyna never even got cabins on the Argo II, since they were unexpected passengers and so probably had to just sleep in the sickbay (if they slept at all, which they probably insisted they didn't need to - or fell asleep in odd spots around the ship) and so were forced to be roommates for a little bit before their quest, or shared a room with someone else on the ship.

[moonlit-orchid]

These two lines in the movie make me the most mentally unwell.

"I should have been the one to go. You needed your mother more than you needed me."

The amount of layers to this, oh my god. He's blaming himself for being alive. He probably wants to die. He genuinely thinks Adrian needs Emilie more.

And it's been YEARS since Emilie's passed away. Look how tiny Adrian is over there, he only just about comes about the bedpost. Gabriel still looks like he did in the pictures of when Adrian was little. It's been literal years. It could have literally been a full decade ago.

And Gabriel breaks the narrative here. He's supposed to be telling a story, he's supposed to be saying what happened in the past. But at this point, he doesn't say "your mother was taken from us" or anything like that referencing Emilie's passing. The story breaks, he's using a statement. I should have been the one to go. It's completely out of the story, because he isn't saying what he felt then, there's no "I felt like I should have been the one to go". It's just "I should have been."

Because he still thinks this. It's been about a decade, and his opinion, his feelings about this, is still "I should have died". It interrupts his storytelling because of how strongly he feels this way, almost like it's a fact to him.

And then he follows it with "You needed your mother more than you needed me." Again, he says this like it's a fact, like Adrian actually did need his mother more. Because he believes it himself. And this could be because of so many things. It could be because of the way people consider the mother to be the one supposed to care for the children much more than the father, or it could be that Gabriel himself didn't see how much Adrian needed him, or even that Gabriel didn't see himself as useful to Adrian. Especially because he said he should have been the one to die. He's essentially saying he was useless. That he was expendable but Emilie wasn't. He literally is implying he doesn't see any worth in himself regarding being a father.

And then it's not just his grief, it's Adrian's grief that has him desperate to bring Emilie back. He literally doesn't care about himself, he wants his son to be happy and doesn't see himself as able to do that. He loves him to the point of being suicidal and self-sacrificing if it would give Adrian what he need, all while simultaneously not seeing himself as what Adrian needs because he doesn't think he has that much worth regarding him.

[walmart-miku]

Furina's character design fucks me up so much. Because when it's Furina the human she has short hair. When she's Furina the "God", she has both her short hair and the long hair in the back, symbolizing how Furina isn't really a "god" but more a human playing the part of a God. And then when she has just long hair Furina isn't Furina, she's Focalors.

Idk, just the fact that hoyo made it so you can tell them apart fucks me up on so many levels.

[impish-ivy]

Thinking back on it, it’s so obvious Solomon isn’t as emotionally intelligent as I additionally thought he was. Which knowing his childhood and background…yeah that makes a whole heck of a lot of sense.

[buddiedaydreamer911]

okay but that was real. eddie’s speech was real. i didn’t read that in a fanfiction, ryan guzman acted that scene out and poured his heart and soul into it. that actually happened.

then christopher walked in, christopher thinks kim is his mom.

i need to go lie down.

[clegfly]

Congrats mari omori for being the best character ever,,,

[pastafossa]

Update.

Mom made another little bit of improvement today. She's still on the ventilator, but now if I understood it right, she's basically breathing on her own again and they've lowered her sedation to practically nothing, allowing her to slowly come up. If - and the doctor was very firm that this is an if - if she continues to come up and stays stable, she might be off the ventilator tomorrow! He said they want her fairly alert before taking her off, but if all goes well, when I see my mom again tomorrow, she'll be off the ventilator. She also reacted a lot to me and sis today when we saw her, so that's something.

I feel like I've been floating in a haze since they put her under on Monday. Time is... weird, passing too fast or weirdly slow. I feel like I blink in the afternoon and suddenly it's time for bed, or a 30 min wait for an update takes hours. And I've wound up spending a lot of time between hospital visits just feeling... stuck. Unsure of what to do, of what's ok, of what I should be doing. Thanks to some encouragement from friends here - comments, messages, late night chats even when I'm out of it or drop out halfway through to cry or fall asleep - I at least felt a little less guilty about not having much I could do, and I've gotten regular reminders to eat and drink. We've also started putting up the tree so it'll there when mom comes home, which has helped. But god, if mom woke up tomorrow, if I knew she would be ok, I could handle things.

One more night for mama on the ventilator. Just one more. Then I can give her a hug, and cry some happy tears. Fingers crossed.

[wexhappyxfew]

hey! in one of your recent answers to an ask, you said that judy often told her self off for having a crush as a teenager - does she feel any of that hesitation or kind of self-deprivation with rosie?

HEY!!!!!

i would definitely say yes to that — i mentioned something in that previous ask about how judy’s past in a major player in her current present life (and not necessarily in all bad ways) but i would say this is one such example where is DOES affect her in not entirely the best light.

growing up on a farm, with a lack of an education, a whole lot of siblings, stressed out parents and a stress bubble around the house, when things like that DID happen, ie getting a crush and not feeling like she could talk about it with someone. she’d think about it and go over it in her head and then try to detach herself from that idea. there’s that hint of self-deprivation there already. this idea that there’s other, better options and that her having a crush is something she’ll eventually get over. so having that experience in her youth DEFINITELY makes her hesitant with rosie in many ways.

there was a prompt i did a few weeks back where judy is promoted to lieutenant (by rosie’s doing) and she lets it slip a bit that she sorta-kinda-maybe-possible is in love with him and/or loves him and we don’t know what HE thinks of that, we just get judy’s interpretation. but she tells him that ‘no one has ever loved him like she has’ sorta vibes and she realizes ‘oh shit THATS what i said’ and makes a run for it. running from the fact she said that. AND NOW — we still don’t know what their next meeting is and if judy tries to clear that up or make things right. which brings us to that idea of hesitation and self-deprivation. she feels if she were confident in herself, she would’ve ran with it. but having those experiences and having feelings before that she detached from, suddenly she is enthralled with rosie and really doesn’t know what to do.

that’s definitely why the Silver Bullets crew is so important to her — it makes her feel OKAY to have those feelings and she has people who she can talk about them with her. especially about her feelings for rosie. and i think that’s really sweet :) her feeling comfortable enough to open up.

but definitely would say it makes her more hesitant. because things get VERY REAL VERY FAST. and she’s suddenly like — i AM in love with him. what do i do? do i DESERVE this? that’s her biggest question. oh judy rybinski u sweet bean!!!!!!! <3

fantastic question friend! thank you and i hope you enjoyed my response! :)

[modern-inheritance]

Modern Inheritance: Bad Reaction (Eldest Supershort)

(A/N: I have had this in my head for a while, but Arya showing Iz her scars and revealing the curse Durza left finally gave me a bit of a push for this. Again, Arya and Glen are Platonic Soulmates, Fyrn Breol, and have fought together for 50-60 years, a majority of those without Fäolin. And they just learned like two to three weeks ago that their best friend is alive, only for them both to start going through massive trauma recovery 'it gets way worse before it gets better' type deals. For even further context, Arya is very, very out of it here and just knows that Glen seems to be hurt and is singleminded on fixing that.)

{Glen and Arya tried to test the curse Durza left in her scars. Just a little nick with a scalpel over one of them, just enough to draw blood, and Glen would heal the cut to test if the curse allowed full healing of new wounds over the old.

It didn't...she had warned him that it would be bad, but...for a moment, he lost her again and he didn't know....}

~~~~

BAD REACTION (SHORT)

Arya had seen Glenwing cry before. She had seen him cry at funerals, when he saw newly hatched little birds, when he was angry and sad all at once. She’d seen him ugly cry about the good things and the bad, little hiccups escaping him while he laughed at his outburst of emotion or as he tried to hide the tears streaming down his face as he packed up bloodied medical instruments beside the body of a fallen innocent. 

So she couldn’t pinpoint why hearing him crying, body damn near convulsing with the strength of his ragged, gasped sobs, felt so different this time. Maybe it was because she had never heard him cry like this, nothing so pained, so visceral. It sounded like it was being dragged out from his very core, the deepest parts of himself. 

Arya blinked and tried to raise a hand to touch her cheek. They were wet. His tears had fallen on her face, slid down her cheek and splashed on her forehead. For some reason her movement had Glenwing redoubling his sobs, and it was only when he tightened his grip did Arya realize the man was holding her cradled against his chest, arms wrapped tight around her body, the left one unyielding in places where there should have been some softness yet still so warm. 

Her throat hurt. So instead of speaking she reached out to him and managed to brush fingertips on his neck, unable to raise her hand any higher. Fuck, she felt so, ridiculously weak, weak and sore and like there were thunderclouds arguing in her skull. 

But Glen was crying. Glen was crying and he could be hurt so he had to come first, he was hurting and hurting bad, so she could wait. Fyrn Breol takes care of each other. Pick up the pieces, bring each other back. And Glen was crying and whatever had her muscles aching and body encased in lightning, that could wait until Glen…until Glen was okay because fuck, he was all she had left, and she couldn’t let him get hurt–

“Spirits, I thought I killed you!” If it were even possible, Glen held his friend closer and buried his face into her neck, his words nearly lost to the choked sounds of his tears. He rocked them both back and forth, trying to find some way to breathe. He knew he had to calm down but it had been so…so much worse than he thought, and it had lasted longer even when he had ripped away from the magic–

Head snapping back, a ragged, unimaginable sound of agony, of a soul torn to shreds in an instant. The force of the scream or the body remembering, he didn’t know but blood had already filled her mouth before she convulsed to the ground. Tearing away from the magic felt as though it took eons but in reality it was only three seconds of healing, of attempted healing, crimson still trickling from the tiny cut they had made to test it. The seizures didn’t stop when the link was broken, a handful more seconds until she stilled and her eyes were still open–

“Ari, your heart stopped.” Glen forced it out with a ragged gasp, and, unable to stop himself, his sobbing began anew, curling around her as if to try and protect her from his own memories. “I thought I killed you, I killed you, I didn’t know if I could get you back, and I–I thought–”

A hand settled on the back of his neck. 

“Got me back, though.” Oh, her voice. It was rough and barely above a croak, but he could hear the gentle smile there. “You didn’t kill me, birdbrain.” Arya rested her cheek on the top of his head. “He did. A couple times. But hey…I’m here now. You brought me back.”

“I thought I killed you.”

“I know.” 

“I thought I killed you!"

“Shades can…can eat a bag of the fattest of dicks.”

When he pulled back and saw her cracked, wild smile, tired and sore and teeth stained with blood but very, very much alive and very much still the Arya he knew…

Glenwing broke out in a tearstained laugh and pressed his forehead to hers. “Don’t…don’t do that to me again!” 

“Yeah, I’d…like to avoid that too.”