#she knows why this is important to him
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#tv: the x files#txfedit#fox mulder#dana scully#walter skinner#in the first movie when mulder says that scully kept him honest#it's about stuff like this#about reminding him what's important#about refocusing his priorities#she knows why this is important to him#and it's important to her for the same reasons#but her sister is dying#and she isn't there#and that's what has to be important#and mulder knows that too#he knows their work can continue#and he knows how she'll regret it for the rest of her life if she isn't there when she can be#he knows what it is to lose a sister#things i made
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sometimes you just need somebody else to point out the obvious. thank goodness for mikey and her gender collecting habit!
previous | next | turtle trek series (chrono)
if you like my work consider tipping me so i can keep making it ❤️
#tmnt#tmnt 2k3#tmnt 2003#tmnt 03#tmnt fancomic#2k3 donatello#2003 mikey#2003 donnie#2k3 michelangelo#tmnt mikey#tmnt donnie#tmnt 2003 donnie#michelangelo splinterson#donatello splinterson#teenage mutant ninja turtles#queer#tmnt 2003 donatello#turtle trek#art#my art#donnie just cant help but see two women share intimate space on screen and feel.....weird#why is that donnie OOH OOH#NOW YOU KNOW YOU DUMMY#its not that important to the conversation but i h/c donnie as a he/him lesbian#the point is more that he knows why he feels strange about his attraction#because his attraction is not that of a straight man cuz hes not that but he does like women and it feels weird to him#and hes been looking into queer genders with mikey (cuz of st) and yet still couldnt figure it out#Mikey dancing around the issue gently as he can making him truly understand each step before going in for the kill#cuz she knows Donnie needs it laid out proper before he’ll get it
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Okay but it's super interesting how
Din = Power = Ganondorf
Naryu = Wisdom = Zelda
Farore = Courage = Link.
Because Din, in the hylian creation myth, created the physical world. Naryu then created the laws - gravity, time, etc. And Farore finally created life - plants and people.
Din created the body, naryu the mind, Farore the soul.
And the triforce and its wielders so perfectly reflect that.
Ganon is physical power, he is big and intimidating and he breaks things. He is cunning and determined, but that's not what he focuses on. He is might makes right.
Zelda is wisdom and cleverness. She is stall tactics and information and team work. She is a powerful mage with a spine of steel, but that's not how she'll win. She is the pen being mightier than the sword.
Link is courage and persistence. He is the wild card sneaking behind enemy ranks, always moving, plunging into terrifying situations head first. He's a phenomenal fighter with a keen wit, but that's not what will get him through his challenges. He is bravery not being the absence of fear but the triumph over it.
They sit in perfect parallels to each other.
And ganon is reborn through his body - his resurrection is immortality. No matter how low he is cast, as long as he has a body he can claw his way back. He can cling to his power, build it ever higher.
Zelda is reborn through the magic of her bloodline. It's the accumulated knowledge handed down for generations, the unique power she must master, the skills she must develop to survive and get her kingdom out the other side intact. Even her name, the knowledge of herself, is handed down from all the way from the very first. Her ancestors knowledge of her future presence, her stability, is what gives her the edge.
Link is reborn in spirit. He is not bound by flesh or blood. Just like his wanderlust soul he can reappear in any time or place. His variation, his unpredictability, is exactly how he fights. It's what makes him so hard to pin down.
Ganons need to build strength means he can't chase after link. Links impulsiveness means zelda can outwit him. Zeldas stationary predictability means she's an easy target for ganon.
But the other direction?
Fire melts ice, ice redirects lightning, lightning burns fire.
And that's the very essence of the triforce.
#It's little details spread across the games like this that just makes it work so WELL it's SO COOL#They're all great at all parts of the triforce but they CHOOSE to focus on the path most meaningful to them#And that's literally reflected in their unique cycles of reincarnation isn't that just AMAZING#And that's why the team up is so important! If they were all working against each other they'd be locked spinning their wheels#If zelda and ganon teamed up link would immediately die and if link and ganon teamed up zelda would instantly perish#It's the link zelda team up that means ganon is the one who kicks it#Also the elemental thing was cool but they do jump around a bit. Like wind is there half the time#In botk the gerudo have lightning and the goron have fire. Farosh still has lightning tho and dinraal fire#In ss lanaryu was the lightning and faron had water like its all over the place thematically. And that's when it's only 3!#Don't even get me started on the 5/7 lots notankyu#But that's the most common group and it's also thematically accurate#Fire being the only one able to self perpetuate with fuel. Can be banked up again. Ice compresses with time but needs the right environment#Lightning go boom 👍 you can feel the static in the air but you don't know when/where it'll strike and then it's all over#Like fr it's hilarious zelda and ganon are playing the long game and link runs past eats all the pieces and while ganons yelling after him#Zelda checkmates his king. And nobody can prove she wasn't cheating because nobody was looking lmao#Ah the duality of metaphors#ANYWAY isn't that so neat???#Reason no.372 why rhoam was a terrible king he didn't just screw up he did it ✨thematically✨#If link had been allowed to run off and get dirty and if zelda was allowed to study her interest (like post kingdom fall FOR EXAMPLE)#They'd have won (like aoc) but nooooooo. I've already made a post (or 3) about it lmao I'll be quiet now#loz#legend of zelda#botw#triforce#loz link#the legend of zelda#zelda#loz botw#ganondorf#loz ganon
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his shapes...
#why him nose so long#i know it's to stick it into everything that's not his business but listen. why.#my mom thought the dog ice-cream was silly until she saw how pleased he was and than agreed it's a very important purchase
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loop and mirabelle. That's it that's the ask
DAY 84: enrolled in the gossip wars
#codacheetah#isat#loop isat#mirabelle isat#isat spoilers#vaguely. mostly for the tags#i think it'd be sooo funny if like. loop and mirabelle postcanon.#loop has rejoined the party somewhat recently and they are not at all adapting. to be honest. reunion probably happened too soon#bc they are a siffrin which means they are disgustingly sentimental. their ass is not taking the time to discover themself as a new person.#do you really think loop is gonna take their own advice.lol.#lmao even#Ok so anyways i think the party and loop would have a weird thing going on#like theyre all extremely grateful to loop. and they trust loop through the general basis of theyre apparently very dear to siffrin#but fucking nobody knows what to make of this bitch. odile knows they are hiding Something but she has no certain evidence to pin it down.#isabeau can't catch loop alone for more than 5 seconds. has the distinct sense they're avoiding him and he does not know why#bonnie....well tbh i think they'd vibe with loop. bonnie win.#mirabelle. i think she wouldn't really like loop? not at first anyways#do you remember in sasasap mirabelle telling siffrin(loop) that for a long time she thought they were a callous sort of person#bc they never took anything seriously at all. like the whole journey didnt mean anything. until they took an eye for bonnie#i think mirabelle would catch a similar vibe towards loop(lol.) bc like#like loop's main presence in the group is negging siffrin and being weird and dodgy around everyone else#i don't even think they'd be mean to the others but they would do everything in their power to throw the party zero bones#so all mirabelle has to go on for loop is that they're kind of a dickhead to her friend and that they're not receptive to normal group#social activities. i think being on the receiving end of mirabelle's kindness would make loop kind of sad and she'd pick up on it#but like. loop is inexplicably important to siffrin. she doesn't know the details bc neither of them want to talk at all about the loops#and i think siffrin would be especially dodgy abt talking about loop in the interrim between them rejoining and them being Presumed Dead#so mirabelle tries a new strategy to bridge the gap between her and loop. the power of Mutual Haterism#more specifically i think mirabelle would get the impression of loop as being much more of a bitch than they actually are#due to the aforementioned siffrin negging#so like. maybe that's just how they socialize maybe they'd be down to talk about hot takes and gossip a bit
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assorted morena dekarios headcanons:
she possesses a sharp wit and is very perceptive, but is also incredibly kind and gentle
strong presence & really eclectic taste. she loves bright colors, extravagant patterns, collecting paintings, and all kinds of knick-knacks. her house is a reflection of her personality: warm, welcoming, and cluttered with ✨precision✨
has a penchant for big jewelry (especially necklaces)
gale deems her “unavoidable” because she has a way of seeing right through him, sometimes even going beyond motherly intuition (and because you’d spot her everywhere)
she always strongly supported gale’s individuality and wanted to give him every opportunity to grow into the person he wants to be
this often clashes cause she does worry about his safety constantly
on that note: would do absolutely everything for her son
her ex-husband had little interest in raising gale and deemed him too exhausting/high maintenance. morena eventually encouraged his decision to split, knowing his presence would do more harm than good
loves books but doesn’t bother to keep them in good condition (much to gale’s horror)
as he got older their dynamic grew to resemble a friendship, which is also why he refers to her by her first name
they banter a lot and it is very entertaining to watch/makes their similarities even more obvious
surprisingly strict whenever the situation calls for it. it’s a sudden 180. don’t mess with morena dekarios
claims she’s not interested in gossip, but is very curious nonetheless
possesses extensive mixology knowledge, but hates being drunk. life needs to be experienced to the fullest with all senses at all times
she’s a natural dancer despite not having a whole lot of practice
very welcoming to a romanced!tav and the rest of gale’s new friends. she has already been filled in by tara and withers. naturally, as long as her prince is happy she is as well
almost rivals gale in the duration of his crying during his own wedding. once he begins to read his vows she’s immediately brought to tears
actively tries to get to know a romanced!tav and makes sure they feel included in their family whenever possible, but will also respect if there’s no interest/some apprehension
she is very respectful of gale’s privacy and knows when to step back, albeit no less worried
she has dark, long, curly and thick hair that is hard to tame. (the envy of all her neighbors her age) she usually puts it up in a claw
tara has her own corner in morena’s sitting room, including her very own cozy armchair. no one else is allowed to use it.
#bg3#baldurs gate 3#morena dekarios#gale dekarios#bg3 headcanons#it speaks#will forever mourn that we didn't get to see these two interact#it would have been so nice to get the added context to gale's story since she is obviously incredibly important to him#(and actually integral to his character. but oh well)#contrary to popular belief i don't think she's that overbearing#nor ditzy. quite the opposite actually - this woman KNOWS#i also think that she and gale share many similarities. part of the reason why they get along so well
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FAMINE: That's one deep, dark nothing you've got there, Dean.
[youtube with closed captions]
dean and his father. dean and his family. dean and how bad it is.
(via @closetoyou1970)
#spn#vid#mind the warnings on this one for real#woe! fruit of my rewatch be upon ye.#pallas calls this my 'deangirl coming out vid' which honestly. true. but those who paid attention know i've always been a deangirl.#also. after this no more deanwinchester rilo kiley amvs I Pwomise#anyway. i'm not gonna give a full commentary here but a big reason why i chose this song is that the narrator#is essentially dismissing her own problems and instead watching the problems of someone else#and i kind of wanted to play with that theme. this is the parallels show so let's do some parallels. lots of things happen to characters#that are Like Dean somehow. either in personality or circumstance. that we know or can infer happen to him. but we don't see it bc it's#not sayable. not speakable. so like for an easy one. we see meg being tortured in caged heat. she also talks about apprenticing under#alastair just like dean. so i show her being tortured [in a way that is sexualized and demon-specific] and reacting how she does#because i invite the audience to imagine or interpret that this has also happened to dean at some point. we just don't see it#so there are many dean parallels in this video. some obvious. some subtle but textual. some products of my twisted mind. but that's the way#i am using them to make my argument.#oh also: dean voice sam's eyes going black is JUST like when he used to fight with dad and wouldn't listen to me when i told him not to.#i guess also the point is that because it's unsayable. dean can't say it. dean can't even acknowledge it. and so it bleeds through#into everything in his life#that's why it's important that the song narrator doesn't take her own problems seriously. dean doesn't either.
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"rhaenys could have ended the war by dracarysing all the greens right there" yes because a distant relation to the throne deciding to barbecue an anointed and publicly positively hailed king and his entire family who is well loved within the city and in multiple other parts of the country for the sake of the succession of a far-away princess no one was ever on board with who hasn't been seen by the populace in literal years, her psycho husband, her three obvious bastards, and two toddlers from the psycho husband would go over super well with westeros and especially in king's landing where scores of the still-cheering population were killed for no reason by that same dragon who would do the barbecuing, because when targaryens act unilaterally without thinking of how the people would react there's never any problem, which is why the storming of the dragonpit and robert's rebellion were actually just collective delusions dreamed up by readers who hate rhaenyra and not key parts of the story and house targaryen's history that directly contributed to their demise and are intrinsic to the plot
truly team black stans are made up of only the most genius and media literate amongst us
#personal#house of the dragon#anti team black#i mean i guess??#like the crowd was cheering for aegon HARD#and they were always on board with aegon#and the hightowers are a powerful house with a lot of allies#and alicent and helaena specifically were well loved by the people in king's landing and the realm at large#and none of them ever liked rhaenyra or daemon who again have been MIA for basically a decade already#and again targaryens overreaching their power and not taking the people into account#is the reason why their house fell into oblivion and now rests entirely on a FIFTEEN YEAR OLD GIRL WHO IS THE ONLY ONE LEFT#if she roasted the dais the mob wouldn't have even let her leave they'd have killed her and meleys both in a heartbeat#storming of the dragonpit but a couple months earlier#the thing to remember is that i think a lot of team black stans are just kinda stupid#and do not care about the story at all or the actual intricacies of the world and its politics that is so important to the dance#(remember the rumors of rhaenyra mistreating helaena and alicent literally led to rhaenyra's death)#(because it led to the mobs and the storming of the dragonpit and the death of joffrey and her being driven out)#(and thus having to go to dragonstone where sunfyre got a little meal out of the whole debacle good for him)#(along with all of her ten million other shitty political decisions)#how do you profess to be pro-targaryen without even knowing targaryen history and where they erred and how that ended them#like *i* like the targaryens you guys have heard me talk about the conquerors all the livelong day#but i am also smart and i understand the world george created and the concept of repercussions#anyway yeah i am Annoyed at that new daemon clip (wow what a shock something annoyed me and had daemon in it)#(my least favorite character who could have foreseen this)
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Speaking of the social context of P&P and Austen in general, and also just literature of that era, I'm always interested in how things like precisely formulated hierarchies of precedence and tables of ranked social classes interact with the more complex and nuanced details of class-based status and consequence on a pragmatic day-to-day level. I remembered reading a social historian discussing the pragmatics of class wrt eighteenth-century English life many years ago and finally tracked down the source:
"In spite of the number of people who got their living from manufacture or trade, fundamentally it was a society in which the ownership of land alone conveyed social prestige and full political rights. ... The apex of this society was the nobility. In the eyes of the Law only members of the House of Lords, the peerage in the strictest use of the word, were a class apart, enjoying special privileges and composing one of the estates of the realm. Their families were commoners: even the eldest sons of peers could sit in the House of Commons. It was therefore in the social rather than in the legal sense of the word that English society was a class society. Before the law all English people except the peers were in theory equal. Legal concept and social practice were, however, very different. When men spoke of the nobility, they meant the sons and daughters, the brothers and sisters, the uncles and aunts and cousins of the peers. They were an extremely influential and wealthy group.
"The peers and their near relations almost monopolized high political office. From these great families came the wealthiest Church dignitaries, the higher ranks in the army and navy. Many of them found a career in law; some even did not disdain the money to be made in trade. What gave this class its particular importance in the political life of the day was the way in which it was organized on a basis of family and connection ... in eighteenth-century politics men rarely acted as isolated individuals. A man came into Parliament supported by his friends and relations who expected, in return for this support, that he would further their interests to the extent of his parliamentary influence.
"Next in both political and social importance came the gentry. Again it is not easy to define exactly who were covered by this term. The Law knew nothing of gentle birth but Society recognized it. Like the nobility this group too was as a class closely connected with land. Indeed, the border line between the two classes is at times almost impossible to define ... Often these men are described as the squirearchy, this term being used to cover the major landowning families in every county who were not connected by birth with the aristocracy. Between them and the local nobility there was often considerable jealousy. The country gentleman considered himself well qualified to manage the affairs of his county without aristocratic interference.
"...The next great layer in society is perhaps best described the contemporary term 'the Middling Sort'. As with all eighteenth-century groups it is difficult to draw a clear line of demarcation between them and their social superiors and inferiors. No economic line is possible, for a man with no pretensions to gentility might well be more prosperous than many a small squire. There was even on the fringe between the two classes some overlapping of activities ... The ambitious upstart who bought an estate and spent his income as a gentleman, might be either cold-shouldered by his better-born neighbours or treated by them with a certain contemptuous politeness. If however his daughters were presentable and well dowered, and if his sons received the education considered suitable for gentlemen, the next generation would see the obliteration of whatever distinction still remained. The solid mass of the middling sort had however no such aspirations, or considered them beyond their reach.
"...This term [the poor] was widely used to designate the great mass of the manual workers. Within their ranks differences of income and of outlook were as varied as those that characterized the middle class. Once again the line of demarcation is hard to draw..."
—Dorothy Marshall, Eighteenth Century England (29-34)
(There's plenty more interesting information in the full chapter, especially regarding "the poor," and the chapter itself is contracted from a lengthier version published earlier.)
#anghraine babbles#long post#dorothy marshall#eighteenth century england#austen blogging#eighteenth century blogging#also thinking about this in terms of elizabeth spending so much of pride and prejudice /acutely/ conscious of a social divide#between her family (as in the bennets and mr collins) and darcy's status - so her claim to equality with him w/ lady catherine is- well#not a dry sociological statement but an important character moment for elizabeth (and lady catherine!)#realistically darcy's lifestyle politics and interests ARE far more allied with ppl like the fitzwilliams than ppl like the bennets#and elizabeth is not at all ignorant of that - it's why she initially thinks he's too much of a great man to be interested in her#even before she knows of his close connections to literal nobility#and that is probably the more ... normative? understanding of their respective positions.#so her later claim to equality with him - in a way that forces ly c to acknowledge elizabeth's own status - is not a simple neutral truth#but weighted in a way that's important thematically and for elizabeth's development - something that the pure sociological take misses imo#anghraine's meta#austen fanwank#sorta
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I am not finishing this because im fucking lazy so take this now too okay!!!
Alts and the like under here + One amputee iggy stump (???) warning IDK1!!!11!
#hetalia#hetalia america#hetalia england#alfred f jones#arthur kirkland#myart#zombie au#tw nosebleed#cw nosebleed#tw amputee#cw amputation#amputee#amputation#nothing in my head man i just think abt my damn zombie au all day#francis is the other person in the arthur amputee image but i figure its not important enough to tag.#just know its fruk. implicitly :)))#arthur needing to rely on francis but fucking hating it the whole time and being pissy#total asshole behaviour followed by downturned eyes and shameful apology because he cant do anything#frequently getting sick and yelling at francis between bouts of vomiting liek dont touch me!!!! type stuff#before needing to go back on that and ask francis for help#shame.... his pride is deeply bruised!!! funny.#i like to think when ame and cana come along hes like an annoying doting mom#but like. on her period. like shes a bitch about it. but in the end she cares and just wants them to stay alive#because otherwise shell probably have to kill francis (solitude fucks her up)#ame protesting like you dont fucking know me!!! and storms off. cana apologises for his attitude#absentmindedly. but his eyes are fixed on ame in the distance and he quickly waves to follow him and talk#ive had that idea in my head for a bit. ame emotional outbursts. idk if ill ever draw it but meh#why do i write this all in the tags which no one reads at all???#idk.#hashtag funny
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ok. question.
ortega ended up hallucinating sidestep after they "died", but sidestep doesnt know about that. they know it got bad, but never the full extent of how their death affected them. so if your sidestep Did learn, if they found out ortega looked for them in every little piece they could, would that change anything for your sidesteps? would their relationship with ortega be any different?
#pulp speaks#Am i thinking of my “ortega sees sidestep posthb” fic again? perhaps#shameless plug btw yall should read it its called 'seen' on ao3 and i still like it#but anyway the important bits: ive been thinking about it with my sidesteps and its really interesting to me how different they are#but theyre all some variation of “i didnt know you /cared/”#caine is. uncomfortable with the idea#i genuinely dont know why but i do know that in the end their feelings on the matter are “whats done is done and im back now” with a small#“ill try not to leave again” mixed in#meanwhile cyrus is a deer in headlights over it#itd be way worse if he learned it when they met again- i feel like if he learned ortega was still that attached he wouldve left and never-#-come back. he would still want to Now but hes too tangled in his relationships and ortega is his /friend/ and leaving would just explode i#-his face‚ god Damnit ortega you son of a bitch‚ he shouldve just run. you werent supposed to drag him into caring about people again.#cecilia would have mixed feelings about it. i think shed resonate with it a lot for reasons she doesnt want to face#but it would also hit her like a goddamn Truck that he chose to move on/replace her rather than try get her back and its easier to get mad-#-about that than question her own feelings. but also maybe she could use this to her advantage? maybe this time he knows theres always a-#-chance hell come back for her next time. maybe. shes hoping there wont be a next time.#cynthias an interesting case because shes in love with ortega. deeply. but ortega /never came for her/ when she /promised/ and cynthia-#-is still furious about it#ortega hallucinated her in death but she couldnt put the pieces together and go looking herself? she cared enough to look for her but-#-not enough to save her?#she would still end up settling on bitterness for abandoning her but the information would shake her to her core#anyway. i think ortega should be used as a squeaky toy 👍#caine lynzal#cyrus becker#cecilia rider#cynthia garcia#ortega#sidestep#fhr
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The Prophet Morrowseer
#morrowseer wof#always liked his character#just a big stinky old man#hate his guts tho ❤️#i want to know more about him though#like how did he become so important to the tribe#and how did they come up with the prophecy#AND WHY WERE HE AND SECRETKEEPER TOGETHER OMG#i especially want to know about their relationship and how it came to be and then obviously fell apart#everytime i see something abt morrowseer i remember the time moon saw his corpse#and thought huh what’s his deal#homegirl had no idea#she dodger a bullet tho#anyway#morrowseer is cool and interesting and i want to know more about him#wings of fire#wof#wings of fire art#carnelian rambles
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Okay yes odysseus absolutely fumbled first meeting with penelope. He was an absolute goof. Tripping over himself, blushing, loosing games because penelope waved at him, getting caught mid lie ect ect
But have we considered penelope was equally a mess?
#Odypen#Odysseus#Penelope#the odyssey#epic the musical#Pre-canon shenanigans my beloved#Odypen being 🥰🤝 rat bastards in love#It's so important to me that odysseus and penelope remain equal on every level#Odysseus pulling off the poor bumpkin island king breaking into the private rooms of the Spartan family and getting caught#Penelope shrieking and chucking vase at odysseus's head#Odysseus: What do you want from the market I'll buy you anything#Penelope: how tf are you going to get me courting gifts aren't you broke?? You brought 3 gifts for Helen's hand#Odysseus: tripping and nearly falling on his sword bc penelope waved at him#Penelope tripping into her room and getting tangled inthe strings because she saw ody from her widow#Meet ugly my beloved#Listen listen I see so many things about odysseus being obsessed with penelope and penelope being the calm cool collected one#And that is not the case#They are the same person#Also I feel like teenagers in their first relationship are never graceful they are all goofs and that's how it should be#Let them be silly!!!#Odysseus: I need her to be mineeee Athena: fuck I need a break from this nonsense goes to see what penelope is doing#Penelope: weaving odysseus's face into a wedding dress athena: I don't know why I bother#Odysseus: going to pull a prank running into penelope trying to pull the same one
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someday I'll have the patience to sort out how exactly the inner gears look
#[.art]#[.oc]#Adam#dnd#''why does he have top surgery scars as a robot'' Sophie's transgender swag thought it looked cool. So she built him like that#as of right now in the campaign he's covering up most of his skin so I can't really draw the innards often but#it's so important for you to know that my boy is transparent
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sometimes I forget that my experience has been. um. not 'your experiences are not universal' vibes but more like 'your experiences are EXTREMELY atypical'
#red said#recent events have reminded me that my life has involved like. a LOT of other people's psychosis#like not in a way where i have been Beset By Terrifying Crazies bc that's not like. a thing.#but a lot of people in my life have had a lot of really severe psychotic episodes#and i FORGET sometimes. that actually that is an Unusual Amount Of Experience With Psychosis for someone who's not#for somebody who has not really personally ever had psychotic episodes (unless severe PTSD flashbacks count)#actually i tell a lie i have maybe had One psychotic episode but because it was very situational and i knew what was happening#i was able to ride it out. because i am literally only psychotic Inside Hospitals and so that's all fine#as long as i LITERALLY NEVER HAVE TO HAVE INPATIENT CARE. Very important to me to never ever ever require surgery i think.#i can handle the amount of psychosis i get from a 1-4 hour stopoff in hospital#as long as i know I'm leaving soon then i can just Cope with the fact that the walls are moving and reality is thin#ANYWAY that's not the point the point is i forget! that most ppl i know have experience of at most a handful of severe psychotic episodes#some people i know have experienced more for sure. especially if the episodes were mostly theirs.#but people really seem to expect me to be more freaked out by their symptoms of psychosis than i am#bc i don't think i really register it as frightening unless they're in actual danger or Currently Aggressing Actually At Me#like i WORRY about them bc it can super suck but it's not SHOCKING or WEIRD#there have definitely been times ive been frightened. one time i woke up in the night and my friend was standing over me with a knife#but also like he was still HIM he was just having a moment. and as soon as i got the knife off him he just came back and broke down.#and we were fine and he was safe and i learnt the valuable lesson that even when people seem like they wanna kill you they probably don't#tbf now I'm thinking about it it's honestly a tossup whether he was there to threaten or because he felt a need to guard us#like to be clear probably don't try and take a knife off someone having a psychotic break. i was 17 and it was 3am and i knew him very well#i probably did not make the smartest call but nobody got hurt is the point#anyway you know there's that kind of psychotic episode and my granny got very violently angry a few times. buuuut you know there's also#been plenty of other times I've been with somebody having an episode and it's been chill as hell.#my ex saw and heard monsters so much that eventually she just got sick of being scared. we used to watch TV with them#i would sometimes have to sit on a bit of sofa that wasn't haunted and we might not be able to watch certain things bc they didn't like it#most of the time she was hallucinating there was absolutely nothing to worry about we just had a few extra variables#honestly of everyone i know who's had psychotic episodes or schizophrenia the amount of times it's been a material risk#is like. low single figures? maybe low double if you include self harm but idk what the cause and effect is there.#idk why you would need to be frightened like 99.99% of the time it truly is usually just Oh No That Seems Distressing For You I'm Sorry
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the doctor is emotionally manipulative. he’s very good at it, and even better at justifying it both to himself and the people he’s doing it to. he can see when his approval, his affection, is valuable enough to someone that withholding it will be an effective way of getting them to do what he wants. this is one of his best flaws, that he’ll do this to people and do it to them for his own definition of what’s good for them.
(gestures vaguely) twissy.
#I LIKE THIS ABOUT HIM. I FEEL LIKE I HAVE TO KEEP SAYING THAT. I like this. its a very good flaw. its very consistent.#its there in all iterations of him (that i’ve seen)#in early episodes with rose he’ll get angry and emotionally withdrawn when she pokes at his trauma. and he knows that it’ll work because in#her own words: don’t argue with the designated driver.#he does it to jack like. a lot in utopia. his judgment only has so much sway over jack because jack is Obsessed with him and he knows that.#jack unsettles him. he uses that control to feel less unsettled. especially when he can’t do it to the actual threat of that finale: the#master. (though. he tries. that’s what the whole ‘i forgive you’ thing is about.)#eleven is practically Made of this impulse. he does it to amy. he does it to river. he does it to rory to a much lesser extent but that’s#because rory has. a vague idea? of how to have healthy boundaries. if not with amy then at least with the doctor.#that’s why his speech about people wanting to impress the doctor making him dangerous is so important. rory can See what he’s doing.#and twelve. obviously. does this to clara. clara also does it right back. this is why they are made for each other alsjjfgjakdj.#and. he does it to missy. because. and i cannot emphasize this enough. he keeps her. in a box.#I ENJOY THIS ABOUT HIM. HE’S A FUCKED UP LITTLE GUY!!!! WITH ISSUES ABOUT HOW HE REALLY REALLY WANTS TO IMPOSE HIS OWN MORALITY ONTO PEOPLE#HE KNOWS HE SHOULDNT BUT HE ALSO GETS FRUSTRATED AND HE DOES IT ANYWAY!!!!#and sometimes it’s unintentional. sure. sometimes it *really really* isn’t though. like.#and sometimes it’s both. sometimes it’s the result of him lashing out and reaching for a familiar coping mechanism in the moment.#but the point is the doctor does this.#doctor who
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