#she kinda a baddie tho

[ghost-bard]

Ive been playing da2 recently, and even though i really have no intention of romancing anders, i cant help but want to flirt with him 💀 i think hes funny what can i say- the issue is my hawke has this whole unrequited love thing going for aveline rn so.

But flirtinf with him is so funny (guy that loves angst)

[briar-oses]

quiet one

reposting all my twt art here cause the quality doesn't go to shit

[galaxycunt]

Also I love fantasy high I’m getting everyone into it now lmao

[arlathen]

i've been trying to come up with a backstory for a dnd character for. like so long? i love the mechanics of clerics but i struggle so hard with the Religion part so i've got all these ideas swirling around like. uhhhh drow. lolth. desert. betrayal???? dragons?????????/

[us-ugay]

gonna go w ayşe for her name even if its two As cuz i love that name anyways im doodling away but like ok now gotta think of like..... idk i guess stereotypes this is the stereotype anime but like in a fun way....

[neonln4]

i found a good boy, and he's on my side | lando norris smau

lando norris x reader | a little bit of best friend!oscar

summary: when y/n's ex writes a messy song about her, fans push for lando to break up with her (he doesn't even consider it)

fc: sabrina carpenter

kind of a part 2 to what a coincidence, but you don't have to read part 1 for this to make sense

warnings: non-existent angst, lando very much in love with y/n, very brief mention of cheating (not lando), maybe some typos

note: y/e = your ex

yourex

liked by user1 and 593,827 others

yourex Biting My Tongue out tonight

Finally sharing my truth

View all 1,384 comments

user1 WE LOVE YOU Y/E

user2 ready for the tea 🍿

ynfan2 PLEASE LEAVE Y/N ALONE I BEG WE'RE OVER YOU

ynfan1 "sharing my truth" OHHHH BROTHER

user3 the y/n fans getting nervous

ynfan2 not nervous, sick of his lies

user2 perhaps y/n isn't as perfect as you think

user4 anyone else just here for the music

user5 @ yourusername YOU ARE SO OVER

♡

♡

yourusername

liked by landonorris, yourbff, and 1,138,827 others

yourusername leng

View all 5,394 comments

ynfan2 UNBOTHERED QUEEN

user2 is she just pretending her ex didn't drop a shady song about her

user6 lando still in the likes ... this is so sad

yourbff your reminder to not wear the red top this weekend

yourusername you've seen my outfits already TRUST there's no red in sight

landonorris that's my girl

ynfan1 MOTHER IS GOING TO SILVERSTONE

user4 how has lando not dumped you yet

user5 you really don't deserve lando

user3 HAS LANDO HEARD THE SONG YET? DUMP HER!!!

ynfan3 what's with all the loser hate comments

landonorris my girlfriend is sooooo leng now come give me a kiss

yourusername calm down

yourusername on my way tho

♡

♡

landonorris

liked by oscarpiastri, yourusername, and 983,492

landonorris a little summer fun

View all 1,493 comments

user1 JEALOUS

yourusername who's the baddie

landonorris that's my girlfriend mate back off

ynfan2 WHY ARE THEY LIKE THIS

user3 waiting for the dumping...

user4 crazy that they're still together

user8 i think some of y'all are a bit dramatic, the song wasn't even that bad and it's just his perspective

ynfan3 A LANDO FAN WITH A BRAIN

yourbff last pic i want her baddddd

landonorris so you don't want [redacted]'s number anymore?

yourbff WAIT I TAKE IT BACK

ynfan2 QUEEN Y/BFF FINALLY APPROVING OF ONE OF Y/N'S MEN

oscarpiastri you stole my best friend

yourusername we literally have plans next week

♡

yourusername

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, and 1,293,283 others

yourusername is this thing on? 🎤

View all 3,128 comments

ynfan1 MOTHER IN THE STUDIO!!!!!

ynfan2 the last pic has me crying 😭😭 i just know she's about to be a menace

user2 if she's actually making a response song that's kinda pathetic

user3 right? her fans all say y/e is using her for fame but she's also doing it

yourbff let me hear it first

oscarpiastri i better get the link first

landonorris ignore both of them, i get first dibs

user1 THE DRAMA if she's making a response song lando better get out of there quick before he's her next victim

user4 WE DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE

ynfan3 all these haters camping on y/n's post omg she's so famous

ynfan4 WE LOVE YOU Y/N IGNORE THE LOSERS

♡

♡

yourusername

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, and 1,428,372 others

yourusername my turn🩷

surprise! planned to keep these in the vault, but i guess things change. 'vicious' and 'eternal sunshine' live performances out now on youtube! studio version out friday 💋

View all 5,382 comments

landonorris proud of you love 🤍

yourusername 🧡🧡🧡

ynfan2 OH MY GOD NO WAYYYYYYY

ynfan3 "my turn🩷" THAT'S MOTHERRRRRRRRR

ynfan1 love lando supporting her through it all that's a good man

ynfan4 SHE SPILLED Y/E IS SO DONE

yourbff i love you so much!!!

yourusername love you!!

user3 these songs are really good ... sorry for hating before

user1 some of y'all switching up in the comments, she could be lying!!

ynfan5 perhaps i misinterpreted the lyrics, but did y/e CHEAT ON HER???

ynfan3 pretty sure 👀

♡

yourusername

liked by yourbff, landonorris, and 1,391,283 others

yourusername it doesn't get, doesn't get better than this 🧡

View all 4,302 comments

yourbff LOVE Y'ALL SO MUCH

ynfan4 THESE HAVE TO BE LYRICS

ynfan3 more lover girl music coming soon LET'S GOOOOOOO

ynfan2 y/n writing her two shady songs about y/e then going back to writing cheesy love songs for lando we love to see it

landonorris how i obsessively adore you 🤍

ynfan2 y'all they're quoting future lyrics right in front of our faces i just know it

user3 it's not looking like a break up any time soon

oscarpiastri answer my texts

yourusername sorry been busy 🤭

oscarpiastri disgusting

yourusername NOT LIKE THAT.

ynfan5 Y/NLANDO WILL ALWAYS PROSPER

♡

landonorris

liked by yourusername, yourbff, and 1,028,832 others

landonorris we are never breaking up btw

View all 2,384 comments

ynfan2 LMAOOOOOO

yourbff i'll have to break all of your bones if you ever hurt her

landonorris the scary thing is that i actually believe that you would

oscarpiastri hurt her and your life is over

landonorris DAMN DID Y'ALL READ THE CAPTION OR NO

user3 they're kinda growing on me y'all ...

ynfan4 everyone say we love you mom and dad

user4 worst news of my life

user2 i'm gonna be forced to like her this is terrible

yourusername thank god

landonorris if you leave me i think that i just might lose it completely

yourusername don't ever quote my songs at me again

[realjem-art]

drew a lot of Viv lately

[flippinpancakes64]

Hello could I request an Immortal!reader who the Cullen's met in the past before they met again in the modern day? The reader could be another vampire or just immortal for another, completely unrelated reason.

Btw I love your work! It's so much fun to read and re-read :D

The Cullens with a Reader from their past

Re-read?!?!??!?!? I still can’t get over the fact that you guys actually like reading my shitty little stories thank you so much?!?!

Thank you for requesting and I hope you enjoy!

Edward:

He met you briefly when he was on his crime vigilante streak in Britain a few years ago

He’s definitely not proud of the version of him that you met

You were another “vegetarian” vampire and to this day he’s still upset that you met him when he was giving into his temptations

Kinda like when you see a goth baddie at the store but you’re dressed like an npc

You had managed to find your way to the Denalis, joining their coven in Canada

The Cullens were on their way to a new house and had decided to visit their cousins since they were nearby

He’s shocked you even recognize him

And he’s a little ashamed

He does his best to prove to you that he can be civilized

Even though you never asked him to lol

You do find that he is a much nicer person when he’s not acting all dark and broody tho

He visits you more often after that and eventually convinces you to join the Cullens

Alice:

The two of you were very close right after Alice had been turned

You were friends with the other vampire who had turned her

But after he died you two went your separate ways

Alice to look for Jasper and the Cullens and you to just… wander

She was still attuned to your future, keeping tabs on you just to make sure you were still okay

She had called for you when the Cullens needed defending from the Volturi, but you hadn’t answered

One day though she saw your course change and you started wandering towards the Cullens

She waited for months for you to finally arrive

She welcomed you with open arms, you didn’t even know that’s where you were heading

She says it was fate

She helps you with everything, all of the cravings and the lifestyle changes

She regrets leaving you all of those years ago, but she's happy to finally be back with you

Jasper:

He turned you

You were just another face in the crowd of Maria’s servants

The only difference is that you got away

He let you run, you’d always seemed to have better self control

He didn’t feel like he was unleashing a monster upon the world

Years passed and he didn’t think about you

There were a couple other vampires who he let go, it wasn’t uncommon for him to forget about them

But one day, Alice gets a vision of another vampire coming into their town, their eyes red

Everyone is on guard, but then you show up and he recognizes you

You're not a threat to them, you were simply passing through

You're delighted to see him again after all this time, forever grateful that he let you walk free

You saw how he had changed over the years, becoming more docile, and much happier

So you decided to stay

You and Jasper bond quickly over your shared past and your current struggles with cravings

Rosalie:

For a brief time when it was just Edward, Esme, Carlisle, and Rosalie, she met you

You were an immortal, but she never found out specifically what you were

It was a whirlwind

She was still vulnerable and angry after her death

You loved her, but she was still so new and angry that she couldn't really reciprocate

You both spent all of your time together, never leaving each others' sides

But the Cullens left eventually

And Rosalie went with them

You were heartbroken, but you couldn't stop her

You meet her again by accident

You're in a crowded shopping center and you accidentally bump into her shoulder

She whips around to give you the stink eye but then she realizes it's you

She brings you back to the Cullens and you two talk for hours

She feels terrible about how she treated you in the past

But it's okay cause she's making up for it now :)

Emmett:

You were his first partner

Back when he was alive, of course

You were each others' first love, but after he was turned you never saw each other again

He thought he would never see you again, never be able to give you the closure you deserved

He tried to track you down a couple of years later after he'd gained some control of himself, but all he found was your obituary

But now the Cullens had moved to a different city and they were all set to start school again

They'd all been assigned a current student to help show them around, and he was assigned someone who looked a whole lot like you

Spoiler alert it was you who knew

He's so happy

You quickly join the Cullens

Throuple with Rosalie?

Esme:

You were an old friend of Carlisle's

Esme had met you at her wedding, and you two hit it off instantly

She felt terrible and confused that she had feelings for you, especially since she just got married

So she let you leave without telling you how she felt

But now you were back in town

You'd decided you'd gone too long without seeing your doctor friend and his wife, so you decided to pay them a visit

Esme was so excited that you were back

She didn't want you to ever leave

So when it got to the end of your stay and you were packing your bags, she decided to try to get you to stay

You didn't really need any convincing

Carlisle:

He had treated you as a patient many many years ago

Before he even had Edward, back when it was just him

You had broken your leg and sought him out for treatment

He loved you

It was around this time when he started considering making a vampire to be his companion, but he wasn't fully decided yet

If he had met you a couple of years later, if you had been in worse condition, if, if, if

He kept thinking about you

Over the years it got better, but he never forgot you

Imagine the surprise when he finds you again, turned into a vampire

He hesitates a bit to welcome you back into his life

He has a wife, multiple "kids", and who knows you might not even want to be around him anymore

But after some pushing from everyone he takes you in

Yay for happiness

Vampire! Bella:

You and Bella used to be best friends in middle school

You would go everywhere together, do everything together

You were inseparable

And then your family moved away

You were both devastated

Neither of you had a phone then, and because Bella moved so often too with Phil and Renee, you both didn't have a reliable home phone either

So you lost contact

But she never forgot you

Now it's about a year after her transformation, and she followed Edward to Dartmouth to study

And who does she meet on the first day of her classes but her old best friend

You've grown up, and you look amazing

You two immediately pick up like nothing ever happened

She tells you about vampires and about her life

And she turns you

Happily ever after

[the-anime-enthusiast]

izuku midoryia’s type in women PLEASEEEE🙏🙏

OFCC!! Sorry for taking so long, in my last post I explained why I've been on an unofficial hiatus but yeah 😭 I got u!!

IZUKU MIDORIYA - type in women

PHYSICAL 🤸‍♀️

bro DOES NYYYAT care, literally at all. I think everyone has their preferences, him too ofc, but he's him guys. The ratio from hips to waist is NOT what bros laying attention to, but ofc I'll still give you my opinion.

SUN KISSED BADDIES you got that like sunburn across your cheeks? he's going crazy. like legitimately. I don't think he would be able to handle his feelings. he'd probably pass out from a blood pressure spike.

He likes them brown haired girls 😔 and brown eyed girls 😭 (song reference) He honestly doesn't care Abt details like that, he'd date anyone, but he def compares his love life to shoujo series and he stays seeing those dark haired baddies.

ass tits thighs personality ✅ he's fs a personality man but let's bffr, every guy has there thing....height, hips, and arms. He likes his girls shorter than him 🙂 (around 5'2? not too short tho cuz then he gets weirded out) He LOVES dem hips. Yk whenever a girl has that natural dip in her hips, it kinda looks like those donut stack toys babies play with? (random comparison I js can't think of anything) HE LOVES THAT SH!!T. He's def secretly crazy for thick hips, like when u got some fat around them. Loves it 100%

okay...so the whole arms thing...he likes girls who have thicker arms...and not rly a muscle kinda thick, more like an auntie thick when you got that little folded skin hanging over the elbow. Bros specific, and bros a lil weird Abt it. He would NEVER admit it out loud, but it's like a creepy fetish for him. He would js never actually be creepy Abt it tho cuz yk, HE HAS COMMON DECENCY. (Unlike some guys 🙄)

When I say he's not picky, I MEAN he is not picky. It's giving very much Yuji Itadori and that one girl that he was like "yeah it would be her" (very mindful, very sweet, very wholesome, very demure) Slim, Thick, Skinny, Midsize, Plus size, All size, Morphing Size (idfk im running out of sizes and you never know with those quirks man)

MENTAL 🧠

if ur a mean ass bitch you can get TFFF OUUUTTT bro does NOT stand for that sh!t 🙅‍♀️ tbh i dont think he'd be picky when it comes to personality but he doesn't stand for someone who has room for hate in their heart, even after everything hes been through. I'm not gonna sit here and be like "oh he's a sweet cinnamon roll 🥺" like bffr, but he won't even look in your direction if you're a "hater"

He generally wants someone sweet, or just nice in general. like ochaco (no I'm not shipping them, she's just really nice and the best charcter to describe his preferred personality to)(did you see her with toga? shes a sapphic queen guys bffr) He wants someone who cares TREMENDOUSLY, like he does. Kindness is what gets his attention, being a good soul and good spirit, someone he can match wave lengths with mentally.

A strong mind and determination. (bkdk reference) (I'm joking) He knows exactly where he wants to be in life, even if his idea of that is a little messy, so he likes whenever someone has the same drive he does, natural will to be good. He wants someone mentally tough and ready to face the world for what they believe, as long as they know in their heart it's what they want/believe. (all might reference)

RANDOM 🎉

He rly likes girls who can draw 😭 He thinks it's the coolest thing ever and it makes it so easy for his partner to get him gifts bc he'd melt if he got a personalized drawing of him and his fav heros 😭

LOVE LANGUAGE - physical touch

he's not huge on pda (he gets rly embarrassed, not in a embarrassed of you way, more of a, im shy and feel like my face is going to explode, kinda way) but he loves sweet little acts of physical touch. Whenever he's stressed or really anxious holding hands melts all his worries away.

LOVE LANGUAGE -quality time

bro fr js wants to be next you. he loves little cheesy dates (amusement park and sharing crepes)(manga reference) but yeah, just cheesy things like that.

Really likes nerdy girls (very big on matching energy if you can't already tell) like js geek out with bro and he'd die for u istg.

Play a damn board game with this kid, Jeezus Chrysler. Whip out monopoly and you'll have his attention till he rots in fictional jail. He actually REALLY sucks at board games but refuses to ever stop playing them. Jenga? He can't even set the blocks up without knocking them over. Uno? He forgot what the word uno was. I mean literally say there stuttering trying to remember what word he's supposed to say.

BUY THIS KID SHOES. He doesn't know why...but it's one of his favorite gifts to receive. He loves trying them on and showing them off to you. He also gets rly geeked out over custom fan shoes. (think like those Hercules sandals from the Hercules movie) He knows it's cringe. He doesn't care. He has display racks for all of them on his wall.

OMG I FINISHED WRITING IT HOLY SH!T I DIDNT THINK I WOULD I js pulled all of these he out MY BEHIND BRO it's midnight I'm dead ASF, I have that convention in 2 days, shizzz wild rn. Pls lemme know what u think!! I've never been a HUUGHERE Deku fan, I kinda js appreciate his character, but I think this is pretty cutesy, how tf do u spell that. Anyways, yeah. This was fun. BYEYYEYEYEHEHEHEHEHEYYTEYRYTRYYR

[thechaoticdruid]

[The Spawn Vs The Ascendant]

Astarion(s) x Tav

Plot: I made a post a while back about Ascended Astarion meeting Spawn Astarion via multiversal timeline shenanigans and legit maybe one person shared a fic with a similar premise.

So basically I was like *puts on infinity gauntlet* “Fine, I'll do it myself.”

Content Warning// 18+ for Sexual humor and suggestive themes. I legit have not been in the fanfiction business in years so go easy on me. 

Characters might be ooc. Spelling/Grammar mistakes may be present. A wee bit of blood and violence. Gale is made fun of. Tav is based heavily off my human druid Tav, Winnie and uses She/Her pronouns.//

Possible Triggers: Ascended Astarion, kidnapping, mentioned character death, possessiveness, obsession, AA touches Tav without her consent (not sexually tho), Galeshaming. 

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•

Ah, the Elfsong. There was really no better place to unwind after a long day of adventuring. And there was really nothing better to help one unwind than a favorite snack, a cold drink and lovely company. Unfortunately for Tav she'd have to wait up on the company as her beloved was currently preoccupied with his nightly grooming. Gods only know how long that man will take doing his hair. The human female rolled her eyes and brought her wine bottle to her lips taking a few swigs before biting into some cheese she'd been nibbling on prior.  Tav lounged about on their shared bed wearing nothing but a black tank and red boxers. Despite the peace and relaxation she was getting pretty bored without her love to snuggle and gossip with. Tav finished off the last few bites of cheese before she pulled out the private journal she'd been keeping since this whole adventure began. Little doodles of her partner decorated the pages along with her chicken scratch handwriting. 

She had documented details of their adventure whenever she had the chance and also took the time to add various doodles of her companions and any monsters they encountered. (Some of her favorite drawings included herself opening a bottle and releasing a spectator. And of course a lovely little drawing of her and Astarion kicking the shit out of Cazador.)

As she waited Tav began to entertain herself by writing down a to-do list.  

“Ah lets see…Yep definitely gonna have to have a chat with that pompous prick who was threatening a kid the other day. Maybe I can invite him back to the tavern later? I'm sure Star wouldn't mind having a snack.” Tav hummed, scribbling down everything she had planned out as of late.

Shit I need to do:

‘Feed rich tit to boyfriend.’ 

‘Teach Shadowheart to swim.’

‘Buy Clive a best friend.’ 

‘Murder baddies.’

‘Wildshape into a pigeon and shit on Gortash's head.’

‘Buy boyfriend cute clothes.’

‘Take Gale shopping for wizardy stuff.’

‘Look into real estate in the Underdark.’

‘Take Scratch for a walk.’

‘Kill more bad people.’

‘Contemplate licking dead spider.’

‘Be screamed at by Gale for licking dead spider.’

‘Buy flowers for Karlach and Shadowheart.’

‘Buy boyfriend more cute clothes.’

‘Study wizard stuff.’

‘Help Moon Lesbians plan wedding.’

‘Research ring of the sunwalker.’

‘Piss off the Gods……Again…’

‘Remember to take Astarion on romantic beach date before fighting the Elder Brain.’

‘Unalive people of not goodness.’

‘Shave Gale’s beard while he sleeps.’

‘Continue writing smutty novel series so I can keep buying boyfriend cute clothes.’

“Tav, a word please.” Gale appeared from around the corner. Tav groaned, annoyed by the prospect of having to get up. Especially since Gale looked like he was going to scold her for something. Begrudgingly she hopped off the bed, leaving the comfort of her room to see what in the hells that damn wizard wanted. 

“What do you need, Gale? I'm kinda in the middle of writing down my to-do list.”

“Am I inclined to believe that you've been writing erotic novels that feature Astarion and I?” The wizard inquired.

“Pfft! What in the hells gave you that idea!” Tav laughed, her eyes staring off to the side nervously as she twiddled her thumbs. Gale pulled out a red leather bound book titled ‘Blood-Mage’. It was a ridiculously smutty novel about a young handsome sorcerer named Garrett Delarous who is reluctantly forced to team up with a dastardly, but world endingly beautiful Vampire Lord in order to save the world or some shit. (The book mostly focused more on smut than plot.) Amazingly the novel had made a killing after Tav had peddled it at Sharess's Caress. It seemed nearly everyone wanted a copy.  (Tav was also pretty sure she noticed Halsin was reading the book as well.)

“My series is about a renowned sorcerer and a Vampire Lord. There's a difference, Gale.” Tav crossed her arms with a huff. 

“You can't just profit off of other people's likenesses Tav! You at least need to pay them royalties!” 

“I always give half the money I earn to Astarion.” 

“I’m talking about me!”

“I think my beloved ‘gloves of power’ were more than enough payment for you.” Tav huffed before looking off to the side with a sad look.

I miss those gloves so much.

Gale sighed in annoyance, pinching the bride of his nose. He was used to Tav’s shenanigans at this point but this was just ridiculous. Not to mention while skimming through Tav's scandalous work he noticed the sorcerer was always on the bottom during intimate scenes. The audacity!

“Besides I use the money I make from this for not only myself and Astarion, but the rest of the camp as well. Adventuring ain't cheap ya know?” 

“You can at least give me a small percentage of the profits. Say thirty percent?” 

“Ten percent.” Tav said flatly.

“Twenty percent?”

“Ten percent.” Tav repeated.

“Fine.” Gale gives in, causing the shorter of the two to smirk triumphantly. Tav watched smugly as the wizard slumped off in defeat before quickly adding another note to her to-do list.

‘Give 10% of book money to the stinky wizard.’

Tav finished off her list as she felt a pair of cool arms wrap around her form from behind, her cheeks tinting light pink. “Do you really need to take five hours in the bath?”  She hummed, turning her head to meet her partner’s crimson gaze. His hair was dry and looked rather soft and silky and he was dressed in this eccentric red silk robe with fluffy black trim.

“You can't rush art, darling.” Astarion purred before nuzzling his cheek against hers. “You know if you were getting impatient you could have joined me in the tub. I would have loved the company.” He murmured huskily.

“In these tiny ass bathtubs? I'd have to sit on your lap and even then I doubt we'd have enough room to really do anything.” Tav replied, nuzzling back against him. 

“We could still try.~” The vampire cooed.

“Tempting, but the others have whined enough about our night time activities. Apparently we're noisy.” 

“Then perhaps next time I shall have to gag you won't I?” 

“Alright! I'm ending this conversation here!” Tav said quickly, face burning up at his teasing. 

“Besides, I’ll need some sleep for tomorrow. Gortash won't kill himself, unfortunately.” Tav said with a yawn.

“Really? Now? I was hoping you'd at least cuddle with me before bed.” Astarion pouted.

“Oh you poor thing. Fine, we can cuddle till I fall asleep. Cutie.” The human female smiled sweetly before planting a kiss on her lover's cheek, receiving a content hum in response. Tav turned to pull away from the elf's embrace before suddenly feeling herself be scooped up and tossed over his shoulder.

“Hey! What did I say about picking me up!?” She whined, squirming a bit as she hung over his shoulder. “I don't like being manhandled!”

“But you're so adorable like this.~” Astarion teased, his hand gripping her ass as he carried over to the bed. Despite Tav’s complaints she did little else in protest besides pout and blush as she was whisked away. The two of them soon settled on the bed, Tav immediately nuzzling into Astarion's chest and relaxing. Astarion’s clawed fingernails found their way into her messy locks, caressing and running through them as the two snuggled together. His skin was cold to the touch, but honestly Tav actually liked it. It kinda reminded her of the cool side of her pillow. Even though there was the constant threat of death around every corner the two of them were still able to cherish their time together, and hopefully now that Astarion had been freed of his master they would continue to do so.

 There was still the tiny issue of an evil alien brain thing that could turn them into soulless squid monsters, but they'd be able to take care of that sooner or later. A part of Tav wanted to put it off as selfish and dangerous as it could be. Because as soon as they destroyed the brain, they'd destroy the only protection Astarion had against the sun. Tav wasn't about to give up on finding a way for her love to enjoy the sun, but for now she'd at least make the time he has left in it special. 

“Star….” Tav murmured aloud, her head tilting upwards to meet her partner's eyes.

“Yes dear?” He hummed.

“You know there's actually something I've been meaning to talk to you about. We've been together for a while now and well…we haven't actually had a real date….I mean I guess it's understandable considering we have to save the world and shit, but I was thinking maybe if there's time we could do something together....”  Tav bit down on her lip as she sat up on the bed. She felt nervous all of a sudden, not used to asking for stuff like this. Astarion had always been the one to initiate most of their romantic activities. The best Tav could do was a kiss on the cheek or a hug and even that had taken a while for her to get comfortable with. 

“What about all our little late night trysts? Do those not count as dates?” Astarion raised an eyebrow though his tone was playful.

“Ehh…well…rolling around in the dirt in the middle of nowhere isn't exactly what I'd call a date.” Tav said awkwardly, earning a chuckle from her vampire. 

“I suppose you're right. We've never really had any bonding time without you being pinned underneath me.” He joked before quickly clearing his throat and finally trying to be serious. “What do you have in mind, darling?”

“I just want to take you out somewhere…We could go out to eat or just walk in the park….” The human female twiddled her thumbs as she trailed off, feeling butterflies in her stomach. “I'd be up for anything really as long as I'm with you.” 

“I…would like that very much, my love.” Astarion cupped her cheek, his eyes soft and full of affection.  He pulled her into a sweet chaste kiss, allowing her to return it before she pulled back and rested his forehead against hers.

Thudd!

Tav quickly pulled back from Astarion's embrace as she heard a noise. She looked around frantically for the sound.

“Tav? Is something wrong?” Astarion asked.

“I just heard something…” She said before suddenly her eyes landed at the window near their bed.  On the opposite side of the window seat a small white bat could be seen looking through the glass. Its little red eyes stared at the human with an intense gaze. “It's a bat.” Tav pointed towards the window. Astarion looked over at the little creature before internally groaning.

 No. She better not even think about it!  

The bat blinked, looking at Tav a few times before curling its left wing against its body. 

“I think its wing is injured!” Tav exclaimed with concern.

“Ugh leave it! We've taken in enough stray beasts!” Astarion scoffed, but Tav immediately ignored him, rushing over to the window. 

“Tav! Don't! It probably has some horrible disease or something!”

Tav quickly opened the window, her eyes going soft as she looked down at the small animal. She moved to scoop it up into her arms but before she could the bat simply fell back. 

“Shit!” She shouted. 

“Thank the gods, it's dead. Now come back to bed, darling.” Astarion said, patting the spot besides him. Tav just glared at him silently before suddenly she wildshaped into a raven and flew out the window.

~•~•~•~•~

While Tav didn't preach about nature 24/7 like Halsin did she was still just as much of a druid as he was and couldn't bear to stay by while an injured animal was in need. (Much to her lover's dismay.)  She'd flown out the window of their room and circled around looking for the little bat. 

There was no sign of the winged beast anywhere near the elfsong, but at least that was a sign it likely hadn't fallen to its death. Tav kept searching, eventually straying further from the tavern until she was forced to land and give her wings a breather, returning back to her human form.  

“Dammit it's so dark I can't tell where I am. Everything looks different at night.” Her eyes strained as she struggled to make out any familiarity. Despite having lived in Baldur's Gate for about ten years Tav had always made it a point not to roam about at night. Her lack of dark vision made night time prowling even more dangerous, especially in this city.

She decided to reserve her strength instead of wild-shaping again. From what she could make out in the dark she'd found herself in one of the back alleys. Tav kept stumbling around in the dark for a while until at last she began to consider heading back. The bat likely wasn't dead since she had seen no hair or hide of it and she really wasn't in the mood to find herself in trouble. It constantly seemed to follow Tav these days it seemed. Last time she wandered around the city by herself she got into a fist fight with some stuck up noble lady who had referred to her as ‘a fat ugly little boy’. (The others were not happy about sneaking her out of prison that day.)

Just as Tav was about to assume the form of a beast fit for the night she noticed some light up ahead. The graveyard had been illuminated by a couple of lanterns. Tav approached hoping it would help her map out her way back if she just remembered how to get to the Elfsong from there. However as soon as she got close to the light someone was waiting for her. 

“Astarion?” Tav called out as her silver haired lover stepped out of the darkness. She expected nagging, and complaining about having to come out here looking for her, but instead Astarion just stared at her intensely as if studying every detail of her face. “Are you okay?” She asked with concern. Something was very strange about this. Astarion being quiet for long was never a good sign. Tav scanned him over, almost immediately noting his elegant attire. A black and red suit with silver bats embroidered on it. Odd. Tav had never seen him wear this outfit before. And he was always quick to show off any new clothes to her, seeking her praise. Astarion moved towards her quickly and out of nowhere pulled her into a crushing hug. 

“Yes of course. I was just worried about you, my sweet.” His grip on her was almost uncomfortably tight, as if he was holding onto her for dear life. 

“I haven't been gone that long….” Tav stiffened. There was an abnormal warmth to his body. Sure he was able to raise his temperature after feeding, but there was hardly a decent supply of beasties for him to nibble on in this city, not to mention he would have had to have found one pretty damn fast before seeking her out.  

“You’ve always been such a brave little thing, haven't you?” He let out a chuckle, his grip on her didn’t falter. His tone didn't seem threatening, but one thing for sure set off an alarm in her.

Thump-thump. 

Thump-thump.

Thump-thump.

Tav immediately ripped herself away from him and took a few steps back, her eyes glaring daggers.  “Who the hells are you?” She snapped. 

“Whatever, ever do you mean, pet?” His voice was full of false innocence, it reminded her a lot of how Astarion would often speak whenever accusations were hurled at him, but this person was definitely not her lover. 

Tav’s first instinct was to assume he'd probably been one of the shape-changers they'd been attacked by in the past, but there was this gnawing gut feeling that this time was different. 

“Drop the act. I've already met enough shit heads running around wearing someone else's face. Who are you really?”

“I’m Astarion. Really dear, I'm disappointed you have so little faith in me that you'd think I'd allow some lowly shape-changers near you.” He took a few steps forward. 

“Stay away from me…” Tav growled out through gritted teeth. Damnit. She didn't have any weapons and was literally in her sleepwear. 

“You seem tired, love. Perhaps we should head back so you can get some rest?” He extended his hand towards her.  Tav was about to say something else before suddenly an arrow came out of nowhere, nearly hitting the Astarion look alike in the shoulder. He was able to dodge just in the nick of time.  Tav gasped in surprise before quickly turning back to see another…. Astarion?

The two looked identical aside from their clothing. The imposter was wearing his elegant suit and the other one (whom Tav hoped to the gods was actually him) was wearing a familiar red and black doublet. 

“Hells teeth.” Astarion spoke up as he looked over at the two.  Tav immediately sniffed air around the second Astarion. The tiniest whiff of death hit her senses and immediately she ran over to him. 

“Star!” Tav was by his side in an instant. His arm quickly looped around her hip protectively before he scanned over her face. 

“Are you alright?” He asked, receiving a nod in response.  Astarion then looked over towards his look alike. “My, aren't you just beautiful? I must admit I'm quite flattered you chose to imitate me.” 

“Is that what you think of me? I'm hurt.” The other vampire laughed. “I am no mere imitation. I am you…..well a better you.” 

“You're not making any sense!” Tav hissed, her jaw clenching as she suppressed the urge to let out an animal-like growl.  

“Allow me to shed some light on it then. I come from a reality where instead of choosing to remain weak and pathetic we became who we always wanted to be.”  Tav's eyes widened at the revelation, though she was still debating whether or not to believe all this madness. Of course she'd been to hells, the shadowfell and even fought a god so maybe this wasn't too far fetched.

“The Vampire Ascendant.”

“If you're telling the truth then why are you here? You have everything you want don't you?” The vampire spawn quirked an eyebrow. Meanwhile the Ascendant’s face suddenly turned cold. He almost looked sad. 

“I did. Wealth, power, pleasure, everything I could ever dream of. I was on the cusp of dominating the entirety of the sword coast. Everything was mine. But none of it mattered without the one thing I cherished most. My beloved consort. My Tav.” His eyes suddenly locked into the human female. She felt small, cornered, like a rat caught between a cat’s paws. “He was taken from me…” 

Tav stiffened, taking a step back. She really did not like where this was going. Her lover kept a gentle hold on her, staying between her and the other vampire.

“And now you're here to take my Tav I presume?” Astarion scoffed, “you obviously didn't care very much about yours then if you're already looking for a replacement.” 

“HE WAS EVERYTHING TO ME!” Before Tav could think her lover was knocked off his feet. A punch had come at him faster than he could react. The Ascendant stood over him, shaking with anger. Tav moved over towards the vampire spawn as quickly as she could, checking him out. He seemed alright, albeit a little winded, possibly bruised. Astarion huffed, getting back to his feet. Tav was quick to cast cure wounds on him to help perk him back up.  

The Ascendant took in a breath, regaining his composure. While the spawn swiftly tossed Tav a spare dagger from his pack. A fight was likely inevitable now. 

“I’ve searched across thousands of timelines. None of these pathetic excuses for adventurers came even close to my beloved. That is…until I found you of course…” The vampire lord pointed a clawed finger at the druid.  “You're the only one who resembles him in the slightest, albeit you are a bit more…voluptuous than he was.” He chuckled a bit. 

“Okay hold on a minute! You can't just come here and take someone else’s Tav because you lost yours!” Tav pointed her dagger shakily towards him.

“My dear, I don't think you understand. I am the Vampire Ascendant. I can take whatever I want!”

“I don't care if you're the fucking god of gnomes I'm not going anywhere with you. I have my own Astarion.” Tav gripped the blade tightly while her free hand prepared to cast a spell.

“I had hoped you'd come quietly, but it seems we'll have to do this the hard way.” With a flash of pink light Tav was hit with a sleeping spell and fell to the ground unconscious. Her dagger dropped to the ground with a clatter. The spawn was quick to move in front of Tav taking out his rapier and aiming a swipe at the other vampire. 

The Ascendant stepped back just as the thin slender blade nicked a cut across his attire, just barely missing his flesh. The spawn took another swing at him, nicking his side and gaining a kick to the ribs in return. The spawn huffed, quickly recovering before moving in for another attack.

However the Ascendant’s clawed hand struck first, slashing through the armor surrounding the Astarion's shoulder and slicing his flesh. The spawn cried out and gripped his arm as his counterpart smirked smugly, bringing his finger up to his lips and basically tasting his own blood. 

“Mmm…Delicious.~” He purred. The Ascendant’s crimson eyes trailed over towards Tav before beginning to glow red. “To me, now.” He said as if issuing a command to unseen soldiers.

Within seconds two oddly familiar figures appeared out of mist. A sickly pale looking Halsin and Shadowheart, both with glowing red orbs for eyes.  

“Gods below. You've turned your own friends into spawn!?” Astarion gasped, his face full of disgust. 

“Eh…I wouldn't exactly call them friends…. Though they are much more compliant this way.” The vampire lord replied with a toothy grin. The spawn felt sick to his stomach. To think he could have ended up this way.  

“Take care of my inferior self, would you darlings? I have places to be…” The Ascendant gave a small wave before quickly scooping the unconscious Tav up in his arms. 

“Yes master.” The undead Shadowheart and Halsin replied, a bright red light shone around their bodies as they were compelled to attack. 

“Farewell beautiful.” The vampire lord gave his spawn self a wink before quickly vanishing into mist, taking Tav along with him.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

“Astarion….” Tav muttered tossing and turning in her sleep as she slowly began to come to. She shot up in a cold sweat, her heart pounding.

“Ugh…That was a terrible dream. Star you wouldn't believe…” Tav went silent as her eyes scanned her surroundings. It in fact was not a dream. 

“Oh gods damnit.” She huffed.

 Tav was in a large elegant looking bedroom, lying upon a purple queen size bed adorned with fine silk sheets. Maroon red walls surrounded her and were decorated nicely by paintings and other fine wall decor.  The first thing the druid noticed after taking in her surroundings was the pressure around her neck. Her hands quickly reached for her throat feeling what seemed like a tight choker of some kind. She quickly hopped off the bed and looked into the mirror of a nearby vanity that sat west of the bed. “Fucking hells.” She breathed out as her eyes laid upon a black and red collar adorning her neck. There was this unnerving glow surrounding the collar. Most likely some kind of magic was placed on it. Quickly she curled her fingers preparing to use a spell in order to tear this damn thing off of her, but nothing happened. 

This thing must be silencing my casting somehow.

Tav for a moment before forming an idea. She could probably wildshape into something small and squeeze out. Maybe. The druid sighed before getting on all fours preparing to transform into a rat. She let out a grunt, but nothing happened. 

“Oh fuck you!” She shouted before rolling and desperately trying to yank the collar off.

 Tav growled and pulled on the neck piece, yanking as hard as she could, resorting to gnawing on it. 

Knock knock.

The druid immediately ceased her actions at the sound of the door. A shiver went down her spine at the thought of it being that so-called ‘Vampire Ascendant’ again.  Her eyes flickered around the room before she took hold of a candle stick and stood next to the door, back pressed against the wall. 

The door creaked open and a small figure walked inside. Tav prepared herself to strike down whoever had entered, but froze upon seeing the person. It was a small blonde haired half-elf woman, dressed in a house keeper's attire. 

Tav quickly looked into her eyes, letting out a sigh of relief as she noticed they were blue. She set the candlestick down on the vanity and looked at the half-elf curiously. “Who are you?” She asked.

“My name is Abigail, milady. The master sent me to help you get dressed and make sure you come see him.” The small woman piped up in a small soft voice.  Abigail was petite and quite short, probably about an inch or two shorter than Tav was, though the druid estimated the half elf was probably around the same age as she was…well physically anyway. With elves you could really never tell. 

“And exactly where am I?” Tav crossed her arms. 

“The Crimson palace milady. My lord has taken up residence here while he stays in your realm.” Abigail replied before scurrying across the room, towards a closet. “It'd be best not to keep him waiting, my lady.” The half-elf rummaged around through the closet before taking a couple of different outfits to choose from and spreading them out over the bed. “My apologies if you'd prefer a dress, but this is all we could bring with us from our world.” 

Tav blushed a bit in embarrassment as she realized she was still only wearing a tank and boxers. She looked over at the bed and took note of the three suits that laid out in front of her. 

“These belonged to Master Tav. Master Astarion said they'd likely fit you, my lady.” 

“Now hold on, I have questions! How did you all get here, and what is this thing!?” Tav demanded as she tugged on her collar once again.

“I'm sorry I can say no more. Please miss, just get dressed.” Abigail pleaded,a hint of fear was in her tone. Tav was hesitant, but begrudgingly she slipped off her tank before sliding into one of the suits, a red one that felt a little snug on her, but actually not by much. The only issue being that she couldn't get the top three buttons of the white undershirt that went with it to button.  It left her cleavage slightly exposed. Her eyebrow twitched in annoyance.

“Okay, I'm ready.” She said, Abigail nodded and began to lead the druid out of the room. 

Perhaps this was her chance? She could make a break for it on their way out! Tav braced herself to bolt only to be met with a shockingly familiar face as she exited the room. Lae'zel.  Or well a vampire spawn that looked completely identical to her githyanki companion aside from a pair of glowing red. 

“Dear gods, Lae'zel, what happened to you? Did Astarion do this?” Tav gasped in shock. 

 “She's not your Lae'zel, milady.” Abigail spoke up.

“I was told to make sure the master’s new pet came quietly, not to answer questions.” Lae’zel simply replied.

“Come on, let's go.” Abigail took hold of Tav’s arm, giving her a gentle smile before tugging her along. Lae'zel quietly followed, a seemingly permanent scowl on her face as she watched Tav's every move, almost daring her to run for it.

The three walked down a long corridor for what seemed like hours. The sound of footsteps along with her own heartbeat seemed to be the only thing Tav could process as a gnawing anxiety set in. Her chest tightened, her throat felt dry and she could feel this nervous pain dancing across her spine. She wasn't sure why but something about this other Astarion scared her. This Vampire Ascendant.  She had never been afraid of her beloved spawn, hells she wasn't even afraid of Cazador or any other vampire she had come across on their journey, but something about her lover's counterpart made her skin crawl. 

“Well aren't you just precious?” A seductive pur tore Tav from her thoughts, forcing her to look up and realize she'd been dragged out into the ballroom. It definitely was a lot cleaner than the past time she'd been here. All the blood and wolf corpses had been dealt with.  Just how long has this other Astarion been here?  He couldn't have just started squatting here, found and kidnapped Tav, and had time to clean everything up on the same day!  The Vampire Ascendant sat upon Cazador’s old throne, looking down at Tav. His eyes trailing over her.

Tav took a deep breath before clearing her throat and trying to appear confident.

“Where is Astarion? And I mean my Astarion.” 

“You needn’t concern yourself with him any longer. You're mine now and I will give you so much more than he ever could.~” The Vampire Lord stood up and stepped towards Tav slowly. 

“I’m not your Tav. I can never be him.” The druid backed up a little, however with Lae’zel’s presence behind her she didn't have much room to retreat. She wasn't sure if reasoning with this alternate version of her lover was possible, but it was worth a shot if nothing else. However instead of listening he swiftly took her hands in his. 

“No need to be modest, my pet, you're practically like him in every way. You have his eyes, his face, the same little quirks and ticks. Granted, you're built a little different anatomically, but that's not something that ever deterred me.” Astarion moved in closer, briefly pressing his lips against her knuckles. “And now that I've found you, nothing will ever part us. Not again.” Before Tav could speak she was pulled in for another tight hug. She squirmed a bit, conflicted feelings of pity and fear were arguing back and forth in her mind as she felt him nuzzling his face into her neck. He was clearly dangerous, but he also seemed heartbroken.  He wanted anyway to have his lover back so badly he crossed time itself to see them again. Or at least someone who resembled them. 

But Tav knew deep down she wouldn't be enough to fill the void left by her counterpart. Gods, she hoped there would be a happy ending to all of this.

~•~•~•~•~•~

A little note from ChaoticDruid: I really hope it didn't suck! I haven't published a fanfic in so long >~<  This idea had just been swimming around in my brain forever I just had to get it out!  I got the idea from the PS5 launch party animation and seeing Launch Astarion and EA Astarion flirting just made me go okay but what if it was Ascended Astarion and Spawn Astarion?

I don't know if I will continue it. I have other things I wanna write and my ADD makes this stuff so freaking hard. But maybe maybe not 🤞🤞 

Part 2: LETS GOOOOOOO

[agendabymooner]

keeper ! alex a. x ofc (kpop idol!ofc)

"and she my backup like to say she was my plan b. kinda ironic 'cause with her, i'd start a family."

summary: in which polly jintara berkshire, whose friend was an ex of an f1 driver, juggles her role as a blackpink member and alex albon's girlfriend. OR this is just a series of photos showing how down bad the couple are for one another ❤️

content warning: chatfic + tweets, use of explicit language, a lot of dirty jokes (nothing graphic), alex albon is a blink, references to stormzy songs, fluff

note: the title and quote is referring to my favourite tobi and manny song. anyway enjoy xx (i hope my jokes are funny enough)

masterlist

tagged blackpinkofficial, boamckinnon, thepolsci

liked by nicholaslatifi, jennierubyjane, roses_are_rosie

alex_albon kicking my feet when thepolsci pointed and winked at me tbh 😍😩 have my kids pinned by alex_albon

thepolsci no U HAVE MY KIDS 🥰 liked by alex_albon

landonorris absolutely shameless

georgerussell63 this isn't who we are, alex 🤦‍♂️

user1 bro who did you even go with 😭

alex_albon latifi 😊

user2 WHAT ARE YALL DOING IN A BLACKPINK CONCERT EVEN 😭

user3 alexander albon, driver on sundays and a blink every other day 💖

user4 lad i think it's a spider not a snake?

user5 shhhh don't ruin it for him. he's just being himself &lt;3

user6 i just want him to show up one of these days in an interview and begin bonking the other drivers with his light stick like pLEASE ALEX

williamsracing cool stuff alex, but why didn't you take me there -logan liked by alex_albon

alex_albon big kids only, sorry mate. i'll bring the merch to you tho!

tagged thepolsci, ygentertainment, blackpinkofficial

liked by jennierubyjane, boamckinnon, logansargeant

user1 NO ALEX YOU LOOK COOL NEXT TO HER

user2 we gotta humble him- booooo get back in the car albono

charles_leclerc tell her she's very cool liked by alex_albon

alex_albon she doesn't need reminder 😎

jennierubyjane do we go to you for free marketing?

alex_albon no, you'd have to give me pols for the whole year then i can do free advertising

williamsracing this is not what your pr manager taught you and you know that alex

roses_are_rosie don't worry, your level of coolness heightened a little! liked by alex_albon

alex_albon phew! i thought i brought her down to my level tbh

thepolsci don't say that to yourself, you utter dickhead

alex_albon ily

user3 YES ALEX!!!! STREAM MONEY FOR CLEAR SKIN

alex_albon my real skincare routine is money on loop 🎼

thepolsci when we reach 8 figures you can have my kids liked by alex_albon

alex_albon are we talking combined salary for the next few years bc we can start the process now???

oscarpiastri touch grass

logansargeant this is not who we are alex

tagged thepolsci

liked by pierregasly, lance_stroll, danielricciardo

user1 MAN IS THIRSTY

user2 AND HE'S OWNING HIS THIRSTINESS

user3 now this- this is the standard

user4 are you talking about the picture or the guy who posted it?

user3 yes.

thepolsci screaming crying wailing

thepolsci on my knees frfr 😩😭 liked by alex_albon

alex_albon stay there 😇🏃‍♂️

user5 ALEX ?!!!

user6 MAN IS DOWN BAD

user7 if my gf is a baddie and a keeper i'd be down bad too 😭🤭 don't make fun of my boy like that

tagged alex_albon

liked by logansargeant, roses_are_rosie, jennierubyjane

user1 tbh a trip to paris doesn't hurt 🤔

user2 i want him or i want to be him idk 🧐

user3 ain't no way these two just made stormzy references on their posts

user4 girl serenaded alex with sidemen diss tracks before it's no wonder she posted this with a uk rap song 😭

user5 THAT'S PEAK LMFAO

alex_albon never!!!! liked by thepolsci

thepolsci ily bitch

alex_albon aren't you the sweetest 😩

thepolsci say it back 🥲

alex_albon thx buddy 🤩

thepolsci nvm i h8 you

user6 this is an emotional rollercoaster wtf 😭😭

[dnpanimationstudioclone]

Made my own human take for my Velvette. I put her in more modern clothes to show she died in more recently compared to everyone else, but far less flashy compared to how she dresses now in Hell, show she wasn’t the same confident baddie queen Hell, along with us know her now a days as. She’s also got some yarn like elements still shown with her look 🧶🧶🧶 I imagine back alive, she was an influencer or at the very least worked for or started working in that field before becoming that herself(has to start somewhere), atleast tried to…. Ngl with my Vel, I imagine a kinda Devil wears Prada story, of her starting off as a shy insecure intern working for the kind of people, everyone wanted to be(OG Vel is described as the Miranda Priestley of Hell). Though in this case, she may have gotten carried away with her ambitions.

My Velvette-If ya ask me, Andi’s friends & boyfriend were just unsupportive rats, like cmon I get the moral they were trying to go for but they should’ve had Andi actually develop negatively, getting carried away with her ambitions. Not that bloody hard, just look at me-I mean literally every other nobody trying to be special on social media…

Charlie-U….wanna talk about any-

Vel-NO! Jumps out a window.

Charlie-Why does everyone keep doing that when this kinda stuff comes up!?

Vaga-I imagine window insurance must be pretty big. If you’re wondering about her skin & eyes, she has vitiligo & heterochromia, hence why her demon form’s got the whole asymmetry color scheme(ironically most cases of vitiligo are symmetrical in skin). I imagine they were things, she was very self conscious about, perhaps even faced ridicule from, another reason why she dresses less flashy and more modest(to cover up the rest of the patches). So ofcourse, following Sinners forms having some form of punishment to them, naturally her Hell-form kept those things in her new appearence. At the very least tho, she came to accept and even make it work with her whole brand.

have human versions of my Hazbin gang, Vox, aswell as Hell versions of all the Vees.

[manic-sapphic]

some sorta silly spop gifs i been meaning to make~

- oh this right here? ^^ def not catra, totally cool w burning one of her 9 lives just tryna get a lil glimpse under adora's dress -

yee, that happened - u seent what u saw

splish splash - how this cat ever take a bath?

a brief illustration on the signs to look for when ur starting to wonder if everyone fcking hates u or ur just real real tired- "when to take a goddamn nap: a 3-sec guide"

tbh, i know this one ain't silly - i just love tf outta this moment too damn much and wanna look at it anytime i check on this post.

only thing that i wish i'd fit in this gif is the few seconds of action that immediately follow this shi- u know, when catra straight up dropkicks hordak so hard (and w almost no momentum built up whatsoever-goddamn u catra) -u know for a sec bro most def thought he just got knocked tf back through the portal the mf'er stumbled into when he came to etheria -

boy, bye-

oh & just more of that baddie- tryna get by & show her unrequited love just how much she still crushin- "gurl, i'd kidnap a whole town just to get ur attention - and i did"

like damn, at least appreciate the gesture adora, geeeeez-

tbh - lowkey hysterical how the princess/rebel alliance basically stormed the fright zone w lil to no plan, and what they did plan- was constantly getting messed tf up- and they still schooled the hell out of these poor helpless horde sillies. kinda makes sense tho- those mf'ers spent most their lives as child soldiers- they been fueled by nothing but some kinda "nutritional (??)" bricks that only come in colors that can most def promise u just one thing: it ain't made of anything that was ever edible.

obvi not the big moment of the dance err'body all about- and hey hey, me too forsure - idk if a full recovery from that damn dip is even something my dumb lil gay brain will prob ever be capable of

- but i also love the lil glimpse just after the dance starts and the frame cuts in closer to them as they start w their lil coy cat & mouse games- cause the look on adora's face at first looks just as into it as catra is. she's enjoying tf outta this whether she realizes it or not-

--then come the taunts that lead into adora basically tackling catra so hard the btch flies across the damn room, then lifts that cat up like she's made of fucking cardboard - her mug allll smug as fuuuuu, ofc --

and u already know. catra's face right here- "oh hell yeah, joke's on u adora- i'm having the goddamn time of my life-- throw me around some more- doitdoitdoitdotisodj- c'mon gurl, you know i been making u lose ur mind all damn night- so just doooo it- .. and then again... but like, then also forever after that too - yeah? u down?"

heheh - but heeeey tho - look who's obvi smug af now haaa - such flirting happenin right here lmao-

hoppin into a wall of fire w 0 hesitation, finally showin how you wanna be all bout like, being adora's protector n shi- damn u catra- u sweet, misunderstood tsundere magicat- who tf said u were allowed to be so fucking cute fr -

"did you just jump into fire for me?"

-fumbles over words as she quickly tries to recover & play it cool- failing hard af at it & replying in fluent flustered lesbian:-

"what!? no! shuddup!!"

jdgjxs hdtgk tho ok

<3

[cravingpepsimax]

me: yeah i don't really like teen stancest. a huge part of its appeal is the decades of yearning and teen stancest kinda fucks with that. also i don't think poly stancest ships cuz i think they're too obsessed w each other. brain: hmmm. carla/stan/ford me: ...you're cooking here.

LEMME EXPLAIN

so. we don't know that much about carla. right. but we do know this:

regularly visited a 50s-themed restaurant. presumably not just bc of stan cuz she ended up leaving him for a hippie she's just into that stuff

got together with this guy. even if you think he didn't actually look like that he def had hella acne and i do doubt he brushed his teeth on the reg. the point being i don't think she cared too much about appearances

dated stan for years, which implies that she wasn't Disgusted By Ford or something, bc there's no WAY stan wouldn't have noticed and promptly dumped her ass

ANYWAYS. i think it'd be fun if carla was a baddie but also a weird girl so stan would've been her first boyfriend that wasn't like "ewww... but she's hot tho so like"

so. where does ford come in why isn't this just a st4rla post.

well. it originally was simple: i just thought it'd be really funny if she was fujoing outtttt over them. her friends being like "hehe lol twin threesome" as a joke and her internally going Mmmmm not quite.

BUT THEN. I STARTED THINKING ABOUT IT. and what if at first ford's like "eughhhh stan's basic girlfriend that i'm totally not jealous of" but then they end up hanging out together some cuz of stan and he's like... oh... huh. she's different. it turns out she likes st4r trek and they nerd out over that together

i don't think they'd be together -- 'cause i don't think she'd be romantically interested in ford and ford, in my heart, is a gay man thru and thru -- but they'd be metamours and they'd be good friends

this ALSO adds some VERY interesting canon divergence elements:

stancest is even angstier. typically when stancest fics mention carla conflict it's from stan not wanting to cheat on his girlfriend, which is reasonable, or stan having relationship issues with her. ford doesn't rlly gaf about how she feels. BUT if carla is his friend? his very first, non-stan friend? especially during the years where he's starting to feel more suffocated by stan, and feels like he's just always gonna be seen as stan's weird brother and not as his own individual? ford wouldn't wanna ruin that.

if the science fair incident still happens, a bunch of things could change. ford could end up crossing paths with carla before he goes home, venting to her about it, and being able to manage his emotions better when he gets home. if he doesn't, he'd still have to consider that shunning stan would also mean losing the One Other Friend he had, so he might be just a biiiit more reluctant to not try and talk to him.

the two main people in ford's life being two kinda nuts extroverts would be a fun dynamic JDSAKLDJAKLK

polyamory means no hippie music magic to yoink her away from them

most importantly, carla is no longer just stan's girlfriend with no other character at all, freeing her from the nightmare that is "being relegated to stan's shitty girlfriend" in stancest fics

thank you for coming to my tedtalk.

[ceedaryaps]

Iron flame yap seshh: Characters

Hiyyaaaaahhhhhhhh I don't have much of an intro this time so were going straight into it.

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Violet & Zaden: If I thought they annoyed me before OHH BROTHERR. The lack of communication between these two is astounding. "Why didn't you tell me." "You didn't ask" "I DID ask." "Well, you didn't ask the right questions." ..................dpmo. I love them but they're so annoying I'm sorry and then when Violent found out ole girl has the same fighting style bc Zaden trained her too!!?? Violet wasn't mad enough for me. Then after he heard that girl tell Violet that Zaden only wanted her for sex what does he do? Try to have sex with Violet. IDk Violet is a much better woman than me I would have killed him. I do love that Violet clocked him and was like "You're acting like Dain." CLOCK HIM AGAIN. The Zaden being vennin at the end ugh what is even going awnnnnnn. In my opinion Violet should have been a lot meaner and Zaden.....for god's sake, I'm tired of the angsty man act can't lie. (Kudos to Violet for withstanding torture and knowing not to drink that shit the second time around THATS MY GIRL)

Rhiannon: Opinion hasn't changed. Queen.

Dain: This is not a complete redemption bc I still don't like the fact that he's still "Are you SURE you want him Violet." But I enjoy that he grew a brain and sided with the right folks. Like busting her out of there? I won't call him king but he at least gets Squire status.

Aaric Graycastle: "Keep ur fucking boyfriend away from me." Oh yeah, I fuck with him. Is someone not a suck-up to Zaden and not afraid to actually try to go at him? I sense a new fav.

Andarna: Princess Andarna wants blood and blood she will get, I kinda expected her to be different in some way so her scales changing was not a huge surprise but it was nice. Also despite the rules the dragons have in place she absolutely bodied that other dragon for Violet and ugh I love Andarna so much yall don't understand.

Tairn & Sgayel: I'm putting these two together bc man that scene where Tairn finds out that not only Zaden kept something from Violet but more importantly Sgayel kept something from Tairn!!!???? Gods I love these two as mates but that scene hurts my feelings. Also Dad!Tairn constantly being like "Andarna no." is my new fav thing.

Momma Sorrengail: Yanno.......I dont think I dislike her as much as I did, especially because she ended up helping but like...idk. I think id be like Brennan and just be like "Eh fuck you kinda?" like idk how to truly feel about her after iron flame. Its a complicated I don't like her but thanks we couldn't have done it without her? Pulled through for her kids ig so go momma Sorrengail.

Jack Barlowe: WHAT.THE.FUCK what. WHAT. First off, how are you alive, second why are you alive, third SAVED VIOLET?, fourth VENIN? fith KILLING BAIDE?! Someone kill him for good ZADEN DO UR THING like double tap make sure he STAYS down.

Brennan: no overwhelming feelings tbh. I understand his attitude towards Lilith tho def deserved it.

Catronia: I dont like her, Violet should have beat her ass WORSE. And like yeah mind powers are invasive but amplifying someone's EMOTIONS?! Yeah she sucks. And being mad at Violet bc of a fuck ass crown girl get REAL. Showing up in a see-through gown at Zaden's door? You dirty skank bitch she better be next on the off list especially her sparring match with Violet. IDGAF if she helped later fuck Cat.

Ridoc: "The map is under my mattress." King. So in love with him. Can we stop giving him near-death experiences pls ill cry.

Sawyer:....... don't do this to me man he better be okay.

Jesina: Queen pulled through for the translations a smart baddie queen love that for her tbh.

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Okay yall that's all I got for now, it was gonna be posted earlier but I went through a breakup and college got busyyyy hopefully I can give my thoughts on the actual plot of Iron flame soon!

[bumblebeehug]

Also on evergreen's design I have to disagree. The hairstyle on its own is cute but combined with the dress she looks so bad I can't lie, when I first saw her outfit i actually kinda said ew 💔 her hair is fine but the outfit ruins it for me I'm sorry

This is the superior outfit, the more mature and sexy look with the strapless green and dark purple bodycon dress combined with the tights and dark purple shoes. And the baddie furcoat.

I do agree about her newer designs tho give her back her lips 💔

i get you! i didn't like her first outfit at first either. now i feel like it embodies her craziness in a fun way though. it was very fitting in the thunder legion era they were in - laxus was a complete edge-lord who ran around with a frown on his face and probably listening to twentyone pilots or imagine dragons lmao

freed was kinda as usual lol. most composed guy in the group, but still in his own version of emo-era.

and bixlow was, well. bixlow. idk he's consistent, but by being non-stop crazy. good guy and bad guy means nothing to him. he's got his babies.

anyways what i'm trying to say is that ever should be granted more weirdo egomaniac moments and less tsundere moments. it's so fun to watch her petty face-off with erza bc yeah! that fairy-battle was pretty one sided!

and her obsession with cute things also shines through her outfit in a way. she's portrayed as mature in her later looks, but in her heart she's nothing but a whimsy fairy that mostly resembles tinkerbell in peter pan (sparkly and bad personality)

just my 2 cents since i've been thinking about her quite a lot lately