#she doesnt want me to get diagnosed

[aud-imeatingurwalls]

“im not putting my daughter on medication that has side effects 😡😡” all fun and games until the side effects of NOT being on medication is suicide 😍😍😍

[minnieposting]

Uugghhhhhhhhhhhh why do autism evaluations have to be so complicated

[h-doodles]

boy the sudden outpour of angst ideas for larissa weems x reader in my brain got me weeping so bad i feel a fever coming on

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[lunar-fey]

ohhhh my god. okay. so. my aunt does like, she buys random junk in bulk from retail wholesalers and then resells it on like, facebook marketplace and ebay and stuff. whatever. so my mom works for her. makes a flat $50 a day, regardless of the fact that shes disabled and doing hard labor for at least 8 hours a day, often 10+. and min wage here is $10 an hour but mom argued that $50 a day is still more than what she would make working the same hours at an actual job because of taxes...like girl that would be 50% taxes. you do not pay that fucking much. so thats already Bad.

but today mom shows me a video of a knife theyre gonna sell, and i watch 2 seconds and i realize its an automatic knife, and i tell her hey. thats illegal to possess in this state. let alone sell! and mom is like ohhh [aunt] knows what shes doing itll be fine.... we sell knives on there all the time she just doesnt put pictures and calls them something else on the listing to get around fb/ebays policies :)

LIKE. HELLO. THATS NOT BETTER. YOURE COMMITTING MULTIPLE CRIMES. *AS YOUR JOB.* and she was just like "its not a big deal she knows what shes doing." folks, this is the same aunt that, very illegally, paid me to sort through her clients confidential tax documents and bank records and stuff. because she works for a bank. and took the records home to sort them. i dont think she DOES know what shes doing, actually!

[ajxrn-archive]

I’m going to. rip my fucking hair out.

[redriverstyx]

turns out i have fasd (fabulous amazing silly disorder) 👍

[lunarsapphism]

there really is something so devastating about having a parent that has a literal degree in psychology (specialized in child psychology) who worked as a birth to three child developmental resources coordinator for like fourteen years and knowing that because of those things, they will never believe you when you think you have something because they think they know more than you and also know you better than you know yourself. and in any scenario the only way they will EVER agree with you is if they came up with the idea of the diagnosis first. wild shit honestly

[halinski]

Help my mother wont stop

[purpldawne]

im gonna yell in the tags just to be safe but i am THINKING

[mrfoox]

Me: (:

Someone: uh, neither Oliver or Magnus will come by tomorrow...

Me: :(

[cabbagecrunt]

i should not have read the notes on that sibling post

[payasita]

Good job getting ADHD medication! I’m so proud of you :D

thanks so so much im very happy and so hopeful for the first time maybe ever but also it TOOK ME LIKE. A YEAR. A YEAR.

like yall for real?? for real. for real i have been diagnosed since i was like six. (funny story my teacher thought i was on the spectrum so my parents get me tested with the nodes and shit and according to mom, who loves this story, my neurologist did all that and talked to me and then just turned to my mom and went "she's not autistic. she just hates the other kids" but they DID find an adhd diagnosis in there so net win for all of us)

diagnosed since i was SIX. on stimulants until i turned 8, and you know why i got off em? my pediatrician retired. we could not find another who would take our low-income insurance. so i just had to rawdog The Rest Of My Fucking Life. diagnosed when i was six. legally neurodivergent for 20 slutty slutty angry years.

and it still took me like. a few months to get a psych appointment. a few weeks to reaffirm my diagnosis as an adult. a few more weeks for another appointment for meds. he doesnt Want to do meds first, because i must have been doing fine without them if its been two decades, right? i got a job and a car and everything. well gee fuckin shittickers Dr. Brain Guy, just WHAT was my alternative? would you prefer i be maladapted to the point of incapacitation; is that what it takes for someone to be considered? i cheated my way through school. every day after work i sit for an hour in my car because i dont have the executive function to stand up and walk the ten steps to my house. garbage just appears around me. i have three empty bags of hot chip and two cans of sprite on my desk as we speak, neither from today. at that point i hadnt had a debit card for six months because that would have required me to Drive To The Bank, a location that was new to me in this area, so i just did everything on credit. is this all normal? is this fine? am i GOOD, actually, Dr. WeirdBrain?

so we cordially agree that yes i should probably be medicated. i want to do a stimulant. he does not want to put me on a stimulant. "stimulants can mess with your heart," he says, "and you're young, you don't want heart problems." i say ok because i dont want to make him think im just looking for narcotics. even though i am. because they WORK. i agree to try some kind of antidepressant.

the antidepressant gives me tachycardia. i go to the emergency room after reading a heartbeat of, oh, 140 bpm, which is about like double what it normally is and juuuust below the You Are Having A Heart Attack threshold. i get to the ER and the doctor there is very obviously convinced i'm a local addict having some sort of episode. it is the most ironic experience i've had all year and i feel an abrupt and all consuming kinship with those birds in australia that will swoop you and peck at your face for seemingly no good reason.

so yeah, we narrow it down to the antidepressant. as it turns out, these particular meds are known to, semi-commonly, Mess With Your Heart. i have my next appointment with my psych and somehow refrain from pecking his eyes out. he puts me on a noreprinephrine inhibitor(iirc) that isnt actually FDA approved to treat ADHD specifically(i DEFINITELY rc) but it IS given to smokers to help them quit. i dont smoke. i may very well fucking start before this whole ordeal is at the point where someone listens to me

it obviously does a combined total of jack and shit, and the man waffles with this one because he has "had success" using it as treatment for other ADHD patients. he ups the dose. twice. three months on the smoker meds, which are also apparently notorious for destroying your appetite, but they didnt even do THAT. no change to the average amount of hot chip on my desk.

he wants to try quelbree after that. i finally tell him i'm tired of this shit and would like to have more than two hours of usable daylight to function before it all falls to uncontrollable youtube shorts binges and a daily experience i like to call The Weighted Nothings and i would very much like to PLEASE. TRY A STIMULANT.

he's been friendly enough with me over these past four or five or whatever months but at this he gets suddenly very very business-baseline. gives me the whole spiel about the north american shortage. gives me a spiel about how i absolutely cannot, under any circumstances, lose or sell this medication, because they will not refill it if i do. i am sitting here wondering if he he's telling the truth about having other ADHD patients at all like ever in his career, and also, am i nuts or should the "don't sell your prescription drugs" bit apply to EVERYTHING? i dont fuckin know man i just live here

he says he wants a urine test first. its scheduled for two weeks out. i take it.

"hey uh, your piss came back with cannabis in it" "well it'd be weirder if it didn't, we are in california and i am a kitchen manager" "you can't have weed if you want adderall" "fine i'll stop" "we'll schedule you another test in a month" "aight bet" it didnt go exactly like that but this is kind of what the vibe between us has devolved into by this point.

anyway i wait a month and get a good grade in piss. i get the meds prescribed. i go to fill out the prescription

all i really need to say to you are the words "prior authorization error" for most of you to get what happened next.

the psych isnt even aware. i wait another month for our next meeting, which was yesterday. i do not yell at him. he tells me to take it up with the pharmacy, and yell at them. i am going to yell at them.

so i go, and guess what, it actually went through a while ago! NO ONE TOLD ME OR DR. FEEL-BAD OVER HERE. but we can't fill it right now because its a controlled substance so come back in a few hours. hey it's ready where the hell are you? TAKE YOUR METH AND GET OUT

anyway i started it today, reorganized my pantry, and fixed the fire alarm in my hallway that's been chirping at me for a week. i no longer have to wear earplugs to bed.

and with my newfound executive function superpowers, i will be spraying my weed-free piss all over Reagan's grave.

[damagedcoda6669]

omw 2 getting diagnosed w POTS :3

is tumblr just my designated place 4 mental health/disability posting now????? yes. thagts vry tumblr.

so i went 2 the ER twice earlier this year becuz of extreme lightheadedness after standing up 2 the point of almost passing out, and i got a referral 2 a cardiologist becuz they noticed irregularities w my heartrate on the ekg. it took so much time waiting and i was so upset and angry that i had 2 wait so long, but i had my first appointment 2day!!!

ive known since my second ER visit that i probably have POTS, so it was EXTREMELY FUNNY when the assistant had me lay down 4 five minutes and then stand up, and after taking my heartrate the first thing he said was "have u ever heard of smth called POTS" LOLZERSSSS (MY HEARTRATE WENT UP 2 FUCKING 140 BTW)

then the cardiologist came in and the first thing she said was smth like "have u heard of POTS" ITS 2 OBVIOUS. IM THE POTS MAN. basically she told me that its PROBABLY pots but that she wants 2 rule it out becuz theres no cure and im so young n healthy n beautiful and she doesnt want me 2 have pots (she was so sweet :( and so im gonna have 2 get an echocardiogram and get bloodwork done and wear a heart monitor 4 two weeks

kinda excited 2 find out whats wrong w my fucked up heart!!! i think if i do end up having pots im gonna look in2 getting a wheelchair and try 2 adjust 2 it (i tried out one of the public wheelchairs at walmart recently and i was so embarrassed 😭 but i need 2 get over it becuz using a wheelchair is gonna be SO MUCH easier than walking I NEED 2 GET OVER IT NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW)

the heart monitor is gonna make me feel liek joseph w the ring around his aorta.. /JOJO REF

[cherryo]

pls ignore if this makes you too uncomfortable but can i pls have the rise turtles comforting reader who has trouble with sex (like pain during and bleeding during/after) and cramping at random times that just kills the mood and the reader feels really self conscious about it? i've been struggling with this for a bit and i just need some comfort if that's ok <3

Hi darling! I always struggle with having sex because of something I was diagnosed with which makes me unable to do stuff for long periods of time or certain muscle pulls, so obviously sex positions are hard for me to do. This was a wonderful request and for sure near and dear <3

Pairings: rise brothers x fem!reader

Pronouns: she/her and obvious female genitalia

Word count: I don't count for hcs

warnings: painful sex, cussing, sexual activities, didn't proofread

Raph:

So stressed 

Literally thinks its cause of him (i mean,,,,,with that big of a dick,,,,) but its really not his fault.

Make sure he preps you for HOURS and if it still seems like you wont be able to he doesnt worry at all

He cares more about you and you being healthy and safe than sex

If/when the two of you end up having sex and you need to stop at any given time he will immediately stop! If you need your legs to be massaged or you need a heat pad

He's on it, he doesn't Hesitate at all!!

If you try to push through it he gently stops and will not let you continue 

He doesn't make fun or mention anything about having to stop, he's so scared for you when you're in pain during these moments :(

-Leo

I feel he would think that you are making up excuses to not have sex with him?

Doesn't understand at first

Very very insecure but you'd have to come up to him and tell him that you have always had A painful and hard time having sex and he'd immediately understand!

He's very gentle, will rub your uterus pouch and try to comfort you anyway possible

He's upset that he's hurt you even though it's not technically his fault

If you say you're sorry for stopping he will look you in the eyes and tell you never to say sorry, he'd much rather you tell him than not and “power” through it

He knows how much it means to you and how much you want to continue so he'll try again but if it hurts the same day he's stopping.

Doesn't push you at all

--Donnie

he was so confused at first, he had you in a very uhm folded position when you asked him to stop and of course he did

He didn't know why, or why you were crying

He asked and learned smth new

I think as soon as you two reached that level he would've started researching everything sex related

But the dummy didn't look up sex related issues, such as pain consistently through out sex

When you explained it to him, he was still confused and asked if you needed more prep time

He's so smart in everything else but women's bodies </3

He understands eventually, he tries to tease you to see if it would help lighten the insecurities or guilt you feel

---Mikey

Such a sweetheart

If you're crying, he's crying

He doesn't know why but he is

Immediately stops and asks what's wrong and when you tell him he will clean you up, put your pj's on, and get you whatever you need

He's not pushing you to do smth even if you're begging

Doesn't need you to explain it to him, if you're in pain then you're in pain 

[feelingthedisaster]

so, me and my mom's bonding activity is to watch shows together, so this means i get to hear her live commentary and opinions. i made a list of my favourites

(disclaimer: this doesnt mean i agree/support what she said)

she talked about jared padalacki and jensen ackles's hotness through supernatural, but not like who's hotter or aged like wine/aged badly, she talked about it in an analytical sense: how the producers used their physical attributes for views and how it changed their portrait as the fans reacted/the actores aged (she says sam started as the 'pretty boy' of the show but as it progressed it stopped)

she insists the actor of eddie was going through some health issues during the filming of season six of 911. her reasoning is that they didnt show his abs as much as they did in the previus seasons so they were covering something up (yep, she went "im not seeing my regular order of firefighter abs, something is wrong")

on the same lane, she also says he got better bc they did show his abs more in season 7

"is this by netflix, right? the intros are all the same"

she diagnosed castiel with autism (she is a psychologist btw)

intense staring at me when rosa diaz came out as bi (which i obviusly ignored)

*watching the harry styles fanfiction movie* me: "dont you ever do that to me" / her: "all your faves are dead"

a lot of complains about the recycling and predictability of the plot of supernatural

an incredible awkard car conversation about lockwood's survivor guilt (we googled his backstory) as the reason of his reckless/almost suicidal actions [she clearly did not want to add to the conversation but i guess the psychologist in her had to]

spn s8, aaron flirting with dean scene "they are making dean gay, arent they?" (didnt tell her anything, there some things you gotta let them figure out on their own)

*edwin payne exists* "well, that's a repressed gay"

[context: we watch shows in english with english subtitles but we are not from a english speaking country, she learned english when she was young and i currently go to classes] me: "i dont need to study for the english test i have tomorrow, i just need to watch one more episode. in fact, tv is actively studying for the listening comphrension part" / her: "right, then im not procrastinating work, im just helping my daughter study for her test then" / "right" / "right"