#she can still defend herself with the other

[maaarine]

Why are British teenage girls so unhappy? Here’s the answer (Caitlin Moran, The Times, Sep 13 2024)

"The report, by the Children’s Society, found that British 15-year-old girls are the most unhappy in Europe.

British girls aged 10-15 are “significantly less happy” with their life, appearance, family and school than the average boy — and their happiness is still declining.

Boys’ life satisfaction, meanwhile, remains broadly stable. (…)

But I still didn’t have an “aha!” moment about why this so disproportionately affects girls until… I talked to some teenage girls.

It was at a party, and I went to vape with them on the patio. Because I take my nicotine like children do.

“Duh — it’s the boys,” one said when I brought it up, as all the others agreed.

“The boys?” I asked.

My last book, What About Men?, had been all about how much boys struggle these days: their loneliness; their suicide rates. I’d spent the past year feeling very sympathetic towards boys.

“Yeah, well, who do you think they’re taking out their unhappiness on? It’s us,” another girl said.

“One boy at school used to draw a picture every day of how ugly I was,” a third girl said. “Every day for two years.”

“They’ve all got ‘Rate The Girls’ polls on their WhatsApps,” the first said. “They mark you down for weight gain, haircuts, what you say.”

“But then, if you’re hot, it’s just as bad, in a different way, because they’ll be talking about how they want to f*** you.”

The girls discussed coping techniques. Bad news: none of them worked.

“The only way you can stop them is if you become ‘one of the boys’ and hang out with them. But then,” the second girl said with a sigh, “all the other girls call you a slut. Because you’ve gone over to the boys’ side.”

“Surely it’s not all the boys?” I said. “There must be some nice boys?”

“Oh, yeah,” one girl said. “But they keep their heads down. Because… well, look.”

She showed me the Instagram account of her friend. Under every picture she posted of herself — smiling in a new dress; with her dog — dozens of anonymous accounts had replied with the most rank abuse.

“Fat.” “Slut.” “You gonna try and kill yourself again, for attention?”

“They’re all boys from her school,” she said. “And look, this one boy tried to defend her.”

I saw a series of messages from a brave teenage boy, posting things like, “You’re all big men, leaving these replies under anonymous accounts.”

As I could see, this boy immediately became a target too. Mainly accusations that he was “white knighting” this girl: “You wanna f*** her, bro?”

“So,” I asked, “you don’t think it’s social media pressure to be beautiful, or the economy, that’s making girls so sad?”

“Well, yeah, them too,” the first girl said. “But, Monday-Friday, 9-3, I’m not on social media. I’m not… in the economy. I’m just with these boys. And no one talks about how horrible they are.”

I thought about another recent report, showing a 30 per cent ideological gap between Gen Z men, who are increasingly conservative, and Gen Z women, who are increasingly progressive.

I thought about Andrew Tate, who has nine million mostly young male followers — and faces human trafficking charges, which he denies.

And I thought: maybe these girls are on to something. Maybe more people need to vape with teenage girls and ask them for the school gossip."

[grilledcheese-savage]

Opposites Detract AU part 2

I left some things out but here’s a clearer picture of what the rest of the story would have been like.

Pls read the og post right here

https://www.tumblr.com/grilledcheese-savage/763805500110487552/new-au-idea-opposites-detract-i-came-up-with-this

For some reason it won’t let me link it normally

Ok so as you can see in the picture, Marinette is Multimouse… but is that all she is?

For the first “season” or less, she is a civilian. She is free to live her life normally without having to take any unnecessary risks. Until she runs into this old man (master fu) and helps him out. I always thought this would be during feast or a situation like that, where either he’s in turtle hero form and she acts as a shield for him, or helps him like the first episode as a civilian. Either way, Master fu remembers this. He tests her more than he did chat noir and la coccinelle because it turned out pretty poor last time. He has paranoia. But Marinette is a pure soul so he leads her to his shop and reveals the miraculous to her eventually, UNBEKNOWNST TO CHAT NOIR AND LA COCCINELLE. Because while he was hoping the next guardian would have been ladybug, he needed a person he could truely trust. And that turned out to be Marinette. She becomes the guardian for the same reasons in the original, it becomes to dangerous for him to continue and he loses his memory. But Marinette continues to work in his shop (a cover for guardian duties).

Lila and Adrien also “work” at his antique shop but neither of them know she’s the new guardian (yet) I’m not sure if they’d find out immediately after master fu has to quit, or Marinette keeps up the charade a little longer. I think it’s more fun to imagine her knowing more than she let on.

When she meets master fu at first and starts training under him, she doesn’t get to keep a miraculous. She works under a lot more conditions than the others do since her job keeping secrets is incredibly important and fu still struggles to trust her. Eventually she proves herself of course, but the pressure of being guardian is so much to handle.

Adrien was going to be a guardian at first since he gained more of Fu’s trust than Lila, but since he has the Kwami of destruction, just like that other guardian man that I can’t remember the name of, they all have some kind of bias against them. He couldn’t trust him not to take the miraculous of the ladybug and grant a wish, even if he kept that from him. He also just doesn’t get along with La coccinelle at all, so he couldn’t have someone with a bias be guardian (he’s hypocritical).

More about Adrien: As cat noir he doesn’t get to be his flirtatious persona he originally has, instead he takes on a more serious altruistic approach since he is pretty hated unanimously by the public. His persona becomes more of a lie, as he tries to undo all of the hatred that came from the destruction of Paris that first day. Think of goro akechi in persona 5; he learns to distain his constant visual presence, the fact on and off the job he is constantly being watched. There’s not a moment that either one of his selves is on tv. And because he’s being filmed there are quick moments the news capture of him being kind to the public and turning around with a resentful face on. He doesn’t totally get to enjoy his freedom as chat noir since the police always try to capture him. But they fail to, and there’s a still a small few of fans of theirs that defend them.

Basically he gets cancelled a lot. 😅

La coccinelle is allowed to pick a miraculous to help her ONE TIME by Master fu, and she picked Chloe Bougeious with the bee miraculous. Chloe accepted and caused a lot of mayhem. Which was fixed. But after that was when he met Marinette and started planning defense and strategy with her. So the next time they needed help, he sent Marinette as multimouse which pissed Lila off because it made her think master fu still didn’t believe she could handle it. When really it was a mix of both not trusting her, and the fact that Marinette was prepared for a lot longer then she was.

This makes lila have a one-sided beef with multimouse, even though she’s secretly her civilian crush Marinette. Love square? Ehh. What Lila doesn’t realize is behind the scenes Marinette doesn’t hold any ill-will for Coccinelle. In fact, she defends her to master fu and convinces him to give Lila more freedom more often. But of course, doesn’t know this. And the unspoken beef continues.

Now, for Kagami and Luka’s place in this story.

While Marinette is a civilian she meets Luka and they become friends very quickly. Same with Adrien and kagami. But at this point in time, Adrien doesn’t really have a crush on kagami, since the slippery slope of coincidences caused Adrien to have a crush on Marinette first. Kagami however seems to be the only one who sees this darkness brewing in Adrien (emo I know, but I digress) Kagami, does in fact, gain a crush on Adrien because she thinks he’s like her- lost in this world, without a lot of friends to help.

Luka and Marinette however, still get together but after Marinette becomes a guardian. They don’t last very long because of this, because her constant work between the bakery, the antique shop, guardianship etc. makes her late to everything they plan to do together. Luka ends things believing that Marinette only likes him as a friend and that’s why she puts work ahead of him everytime. This breaks Marinette’s heart, even though she understands, so she accidentally ends up saying in front of Adrien that she’s not dating anymore, and is focusing on her career. Marinette is oblivious to the fact that both lila and Adrien have a crush on her.

Marinette sees that Luka is responsible and puts his feelings aside for the greater good and chooses him to have the snake miraculous part time. When she is multimouse, she’s pretty awkward around him since things left off kind of sad, but since Superion doesn’t know that Marinette is multimouse, he just assumes she’s shy or doesn’t like him. This is obviously not true. In fact, Luka becomes the more “chat noir” type in this, teasing the group and very lightly flirting with her. BECAUSE IT WOULD BE FUNNY AND UNPREDICTABLE. I see him being very suave with his harp. Like every musician is lol.

Kagami and Adrien don’t work out either, because deep down, even if he is getting more resentful of being pushed around and molded into a person he doesn’t know, he still is naturally kind hearted and knows that his resentment won’t last….. hopefully. And Kagami only has that, and fencing in common with him, at least in this universe so they stay friends. Plus she meets Felix anyways.

Speaking of Felix. He.. generally stays the same? Here’s the difference, when he say them on the news on day he judged them. Then when he saw/ met more of chat noir, he started to believe that they were like him and saw the world the same way as he did and starts to commit similar atrocities in the show with the peacock miraculous in hopes that since they were the same, they’d leave him be.

Since chat noir is growing increasingly disdainful, he more or less does want to leave him alone, but the part of him that knows it’s his duty wins every time since he is , still, a little more responsible in this than the show.

Also a reminder, Adrien doesn’t start out like this, he’s still the show’s version at the beginning, he just changes with every situation they find themselves in. So when Felix eventually comes to meet him, he assumes Adrien is the same as always- a goody two shoes who does what he’s told. That couldn’t be further from the truth 😂

Adrien is similar to Felix but still mostly tries to act like his old self, since it’s easier and gets him places. But when Felix comes over and is cold, Adrien gets frustrated and his resentful, chat noir self comes to life. Felix was so stunned by the slip up that he just, shut up. And left. Very confused.

Anyways I have many different ways of imagining Felix seeing the more contemptuous Adrien. He becomes much more interested in him. He wants to learn more, because maybe he’s not alone.

Idk what do you guys think? Should Adrien be the guardian? What would Alya’s role be? Pls reblog more ideas and add on to the AU!

Thanks!

[vindicated-truth]

Jeongje,

I assume Joowon-ah has given you this letter during one of his visits. Said something about including it in the gift he has prepared for you.

You know he now only has a Lieutenant’s salary, right? He lost access to all of his family’s money, because he didn’t listen to me when I warned him that he shouldn’t ruin his life for me.

He’s an idiot.

But he’s an adult with freewill, and it’s still his money, so of course I have no say on what he chooses to spend it on.

Besides, I don’t begrudge him choosing to spend it on you. Contrary to what you might think, I don’t want you to be alone.

I never wanted that for you, Jeongje.

That’s why I’m glad Joowon-ah is making sure you aren’t. Because… I can’t be that person for you.

Not anymore.

It’s why I’m writing you this letter. Because I want you to know why.

Because I’m sorry, Jeongje. I’m sorry because… I can’t forgive you.

And it’s not because I’ve stopped caring for you. In fact, it wouldn’t hurt this much if I did.

I really wish I did.

But the reason why I can’t forgive you is that the forgiveness isn’t mine to give.

The one person who has the right to forgive you is dead.

Because you killed her.

And I’m not saying this because I want to punish you, either. Because contrary to what you might think, I don’t want you to suffer anymore.

You’ve suffered enough. And I know that because I’ve seen that in Joowon-ah, too.

No one deserves to suffer, Jeongje. Not you. Not him.

But the forgiveness isn’t mine to give. It’s Yuyeonie’s.

I’m hurting because I lost a sister. My parents are hurting because they lost their daughter.

And I know you’re hurting too. Because you, too, lost the one you love.

I’ve always known, you know. Both of you had never been good at hiding it. It hurt that you two believed you had to, but—you made her happy, Jeongje. Yuyeonie had never been able to hide that. And to be honest, neither did you. And I can never, ever begrudge how you made each other happy.

Which is why I know… you’re hurting, too.

It’s the one thing you and I have in common, even after all this time.

You and I… we both lost her.

But all our pain, Jeongje… it’s all secondary. None of our pain compares to what she lost.

She lost her life.

She lost a future that should have been hers. You know she wanted to be a lawyer, right? But do you know the kind of lawyer she wanted to be?

She had a very clear vision of the life she wanted for herself. She’d sit at the foot of my bed while I’d practice on my worn-out guitar and she’d regale me tales of how she wanted to be a lawyer who defended women.

Her ideals were way ahead of her time. She said our society was too patriarchal, that it was a society where women didn’t feel safe, and she wanted to change that.

She wanted to be a lawyer so she could be a safe space for all these women who were victims of the cruelty and violence of men. She wanted to be the kind of woman she herself needed.

She would’ve been the kind of woman who could’ve stopped women like her from being killed by men.

Which is why it was such a cruel twist of fate that her life ended precisely like that.

I always wonder, Jeongje… how many women would’ve also been saved had she grown up to be the kind of woman she wanted to be? A woman who protected women?

Would she have been able to protect our Minjeongie too?

Did you know that she had always been wary of Kang Jinmook? She didn’t dare say it directly because I think she might have been scared back then, too. But she would always tell me, casually but consistently, how it might be better for Minjeongie if we adopt her as soon as it was legally possible.

Do you know what I told her back then, Jeongje? That she was being ableist. That she was looking down on Jinmook’s capability as a father just because he was mentally disabled.

Turned out he wasn’t. He was just evil.

And she was right.

Even back then, Jeongje, she was right. And I didn’t listen to her. Her own twin brother didn’t listen to her.

How unforgivable is that?

Can you imagine what our society would’ve been like if someone with her brains and her advocacy had lived to see her dream come true? Can you imagine, Jeongje, how different things would’ve been if only our society listened to women more? If only we listened to our Yuyeonie more?

She could’ve saved so many women, Jeongje. And now—

Now, we’ll never know. Because she’s dead.

We all lost a sister, a daughter, a friend, a lover. None of that compares to what she lost.

She lost her life. She lost her dream. She lost her advocacy. She lost her future.

And that’s the reason why, Jeongje. Why the forgiveness should come from her.

It had never, ever been my right to give.

It’s why I can’t forgive you. Because the one person who has the right to gift you that forgiveness—is dead.

And I’m sorry, Jeongje. I’m sorry because that’s the reason why… I can’t let you back into my life.

Not anymore.

Because I love her, Jeongje. I love her more than anything in the world, more than anyone I’ll ever love in my life.

She’s my twin, Jeongje. I had never known what it’s like to be alone because from the moment we were conceived in our mother’s womb, she had always been there. She had always been beside me. She was the other half of my soul.

Do you know what it feels like to lose the other half your soul?

Then again, maybe you do.

You love her, too.

I don’t know if she would have forgiven you. Fuck, I don’t know if she would have forgiven me. But that’s our punishment, Jeongje. That’s the pain we all have to live with: that we will never know. Because none of us have the right to take that away from her.

The right to forgive.

Because contrary to what you might think—I don’t want to lose you as a friend.

I miss you, more than you could ever know. More than you could ever hope to understand.

But it’s a loss I have to live with. It’s a loss I choose to live with. Because she’s the only one who could have granted you that forgiveness. And we all have to live with never knowing if she ever will.

I can’t let you back into my life, Jeongje—because I don’t know if Yuyeonie would’ve forgiven you for me to let you.

For me to have you back.

I am not the one who has the right to forgive you, so I am also not the one who has the right to punish you.

So please, Jeongje. Don’t suffer anymore. Not for my sake.

Don’t be alone anymore.

Both of you.

Your friend,

Dongsik

—

Dongsik-ah,

Did you know what Lieutenant Han was going to give me? Because you should’ve talked him out of it still, never mind that it’s his money he’s spending. I’m not going to risk your ire by telling you how much he spent, because I actually know how much all of it cost, but I really hope you’re at least treating him to dinner for a month because I can’t imagine how he’d be able to afford to feed himself after this.

Or maybe just let Jaeyi-ya treat him. I’ve heard he’s been frequenting the butcher shop more often lately.

I’m glad. He deserves to be fed.

He deserves to be happy.

He’s a good guy, Dongsik-ah. You know that, right?

You might be wondering why this prince who has fallen from grace keeps going out on a limb for someone like me.

I’ll tell you why, Dongsik-ah. It’s because he’s lonely.

In the kindest way I can tell you this, I don’t think you’ll ever understand Lieutenant Han. And it’s not because he was brought up in a life of luxury and privilege that the rest of us can only imagine.

But because you were loved, Dongsik-ah.

You and Yuyeonie—both of you were brought up in love.

I think that’s part of why I stayed over at your house a lot, even when we were kids. I was drawn to your family, because I badly wished I had a family like yours. You can’t imagine the kind of envy I felt seeing how your parents are.

You had that ridiculous dream of becoming a singer, even though Jihwa-ya kept telling you to your face that you couldn’t hold a tune to save a life. Yet your parents supported your dream all the same, and had never once compared you to Yuyeonie.

You know, I’ve always had the sneaking suspicion she was tone-deaf too, mostly because I couldn’t understand why she’d keep clapping for you every time you'd “perform” for us during family nights.

I’d been a part of your family for that long.

I never had any of that. And I think—that’s why Lieutenant Han is drawn to me.

Because he never experienced that kind of love, either. And he knows what it’s like to be alone.

That’s why he’s making sure I’m not. Even when I deserve to be.

Because he knows exactly what it’s like.

And I don’t think it’s as selfless as you think, Dongsik-ah. I think—he just wants someone to understand what he’s been through, too.

Because you’ll never be that person for him.

Because you were never abused by your parents, Dongsik-ah, the way Lieutenant Han was. And he’s drawn to me, because I’m someone who understands that the most.

Between the both of us though, I honestly believe I still had it better. And this isn’t false modesty or debt of gratitude or anything like that. My mother was evil, too, but in her own way, she did love me.

At the very least, until the very end, she had never abandoned me.

Even when it meant she had to hurt you instead.

That’s something Lieutenant Han never even had.

He never had a family.

And that’s the reason why I’m writing you this letter, in return.

Because you’re right, Dongsik-ah. I don’t belong in your life anymore.

I belong to the past. And I deserve to stay there.

Do you know why, Dongsik-ah?

Because that’s where Yuyeonie is.

You’re right. I don’t know if she would ever forgive me. But that’s okay. I’m not doing this for my forgiveness.

Because you’re right, Dongsik-ah. I did love her. I love her, still, even when she might not want that love anymore, after everything I did.

After everything I failed to do.

But that’s also why, Dongsik-ah. Why I want to stay in the past. Why I choose to stay in the past. Because that’s where she is. That’s how I choose to live the rest of my life.

Immortalizing her memory.

That’s why I gave you that sketchbook. To the best of my ability, Dongsik-ah, until my last breath—this is how I choose to love her.

I will never let her memory die.

This is how I choose to live the rest of my life in penance.

The people who have hurt you, the people who hurt Yuyeonie and your family—we all belong to the past. That’s why we all belong in prison, because it’s keeping us there.

But you, Dongsik-ah—you don’t belong to the past. Not anymore. There’s no more reason for you to stay there.

Because you have a future with him.

And that’s where the problem lies, you see. It’s precisely because he equates himself with me that he thinks he deserves to stay in the past, too.

He was never there, Dongsik-ah. Because his own monster of a father sent him far, far away, where he was forced to look for love in all the wrong places, when he should have already found it first in his own home. His own family.

You and Yuyeonie showed me that.

I don’t think he did. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone so utterly deprived of it. Starved of it.

Until he found you.

You told me, Dongsik-ah, how you will never love anyone the way you loved Yuyeonie, ever again. And you asked me if I know how it feels like to lose the other half of your soul.

I do, Dongsik-ah. But I don’t think that’s the point.

We weren’t supposed to replace her.

We’re simply allowed to love again.

I’m allowed to have a friend again. One who chooses to starve for a month because he doesn’t know how to love halfway and he always gives it his all in everything he does.

I agree with you, by the way. He is an idiot.

But you know what, Dongsik-ah?

I’ve come to love this idiot, too.

And if I’m allowed to have a friend again… you’re allowed to rebuild the other half of your soul again.

You’re allowed to not let yourself be alone anymore.

You’re allowed to love again.

Dongsik-ah… Han Joowon is like me. But at the same time, he isn’t.

Because he belongs to your future. If you let him.

And this is why I'm writing you this letter, too.

Please don't let my friend starve anymore.

Your friend,

Han Joowon’s friend,

Jeongje

[burningcheese-merchant]

Abt burning spice's kingdom interaction with nutmeg tiger when he says "this place it reminds me of the first kingdom i..." do you think he destroyed that kingdom? Or built it?

The fact that he shows regret and hesitation in that line is interesting...

Do you think he became what he is because he doesn't have anything left to lose?

This can perfectly foils Golden cheese's story, even after her kingdom got destroyed she eventually embraces that fact and process that emotions healthily

Sorry im just yapping here, i love me two character that perfectly foils each other while being more similiar than enyone else and form a weird ahh relationship balancing between romantic or wanting to kill each other

-🌾anon

I'm going to go ahead and say both. I think he built it AND destroyed it. In fact, I'm going to go a step further and specify that he accidentally destroyed it while trying to defend it from some invading force, thus making this the first real step down that dark path. Think of it: in a mad frenzy to protect something he loved, he destroyed it instead. He unwittingly became what he was fighting against, if only for a moment - and that moment would set many things in motion, each more terrible than the last, for not only has Burning Spice now come to truly know the bitter taste of loss and history's seemingly futile nature, it came to him in perhaps the worst way possible, and so left the most lasting impression. (Idk if what I tried to cook here came out of the oven right, but there was an attempt lol)

I 100% agree with the idea that Spice became who and what he is after succumbing to despair in the face of seemingly unending loss (I go into detail about it here, this is how I personally headcanon his descent into villainy), and that there is still a lingering sense of regret somewhere inside of his heart, even if small and not strong enough to influence him anymore. That dialogue he has with Nutmeg Tiger is what pushed me to want to analyze him and construct a possible background and motive for him, and later what inspired me to want to redeem not only him, but all five of the Beasts. The fact that he might have regrets is very interesting and very promising to me, and lends itself to the idea that, with time and the right guidance, he could perhaps... change (to keep with the theme haha).

And I also agree with you on him and Golden Cheese being perfect foils for one another (it's part of why I ship them so hard lol). They mirror each other SO well in my eyes. And in the face of the same exact loss, one folded while the other stood strong (although you can say that GC folded as well, at least for a while, before she realized the folly in her delusional grief and collected herself). Nothing lasts forever, that's true, but that doesn't make it meaningless - quite the opposite. It is the ephemeral nature of life that makes it beautiful and worthwhile. It's alright to be upset when something ends, but you can't let that define you. Everything ends eventually. Focus less on what's far ahead or what's far behind and focus more on what's in front of you right now. That's the lesson GC more or less learns, and it's the lesson BS needs to learn too, in my opinion. And I honestly think GC is the right one to help teach him that.

Sorry, I sort of spoiled the "Change" arc in my Reformed Beasts AU a little bit here lol. You really hit the nail on the head with your thoughts here and it prompted me to puke this word salad. Great minds lol

[yuesya]

Guizhong blinks, staring out at the mountainous terrain that was formerly Malphas’ territory.

… Or rather, what remained of the mountainous terrain.

It’s… a mess. The mountains? Are just not there anymore. As in, they’re just completely gone. Vanished! Like they just up and disappeared into thin air!

Now, there’s nothing but a sea of lapping waves stretching out as far as the eye can see, drowning out what used to be perfectly good dry land. There’s no telling how long this unnatural flood will persist, as if the scale of damage wrought to the landscape and environment wasn’t catastrophic enough already.

The flood reached all the way to the borders of the Guili Assembly’s territory. It was only thanks to the defenses that they’d previously put into place that they were able to defend against the sudden onslaught of waves at all. A necessary precaution, given their close proximity to the Lord of the Vortex. But Guizhong hadn’t expected to be putting their adeptal spells and devices to the test so soon.

Looking back on it, the first sign of something amiss had been Lige suddenly spinning around and staring in the direction of Malphas’ territory, stock-still with narrowed eyes. Ever since they formed their alliance, Lige had been slowly shedding that shell of unfeeling stone, but there were still times when his behavior was acutely inhuman.

It had been the startled reports that Guizhong received from their citizens that led her to realize that Lige abruptly left on his own, shedding details of his human form in his haste and scaring quite a few people in his wake. So Guizhong had taken it upon herself to calm their people and get them to settle down again; it was part of their contract.

Lige would be responsible for taking care of martial and warfare-related matters, while Guizhong would be responsible for governance and civil affairs, maximizing both of their strengths in a fruitful partnership.

…

After Guizhong had finished calming their citizens… It hadn’t taken long before she’d sensed the stirrings of battle on the edge of her awareness, in wake of Lige’s departure. But even then, she’d been confident that her fellow god had things well in hand.

… Which was before the water level had started rising rapidly at an alarming rate, forcing Guizhong to hurriedly rally together the other adepti to put their protective measures into play, in order to protect the Guili Assembly. It was only after the water started receding and Guizhong was sure that the adepti could hold down the fort that she’d left their territory and followed after Lige’s trail.

Which led to where she was right now: Flying above the waves, and trying to make sense of what was going on.

“Just what in the world happened here?” Guizhong mutters to herself, frowning.

The waves below her remain silent, and do not yield any answer besides the obvious: That a cataclysmic battle had taken place between gods here, and this was the terrifying result.

The goddess closes her eyes briefly, silently mourning over the many innocents who were caught up in this conflict through no fault of their own.

Malphas’ people… while Guizhong held no love for Malphas, who treated humans more like playthings and curiosities than actual people to be cherished for their individuality–

The humans who lived in Malphas’ territory didn’t deserve such a fate, drowned in a watery grave that had no business flooding the land like this.

If this was Osial’s work… then the Lord of the Vortex had much to answer for. Guizhong was sure that Lige would agree with her, and he definitely wouldn’t be the only god to do so.

Speaking of–

Guizhong holds out her hand, where a Geo crystalfly alights gently on her fingertip, tingling with a familiar energy signature. The crystalfly flaps its wings, then lifts up into the air again –and begins flying in a very specific direction.

Follow.

“You’d better have a good explanation for all of this, Lige,” she mutters under her breath.

While Lige is not one to shy away from battle, he is not one for meaningless, wanton destruction, laying waste to anything and everything around him. Guizhong trusts that he wouldn’t have intentionally caused such destruction, but if he had really been pushed to this extent by Osial, then… the Lord of the Vortex was far more dangerous than either of them had suspected.

Concern rises in her chest, coupled with worry and anxiety for her partner.

The emotions do not abate until she finally catches sight of him again. Lige looks… definitely more roughed up than Guizhong remembers seeing him this morning. And he’s also injured, with a particularly serious gash torn diagonally across his chest, still bleeding heavily –even though his expression remains passive and unchanging, as if he doesn’t feel the pain at all.

But Guizhong does.

Tears spring to her eyes, “Lige!”

The Geo crystalfly that had led her to him lands on the other god’s shoulder. Lige blinks, some measure of awareness returning to his eyes and easing his stone visage… and he nods in her direction, relaxing slightly at the sight of an ally. “Guizhong. You’re here.”

“Of course I am!” Had he expected otherwise? Just because Guizhong wasn’t a god who was suited for combat didn’t mean that she couldn’t fight. “What in the world happened, Lige? Is this Osial’s work? Should we be expecting an invasion?”

“An invasion…” Lige mutters, amber eyes hardening. “It is possible. Although it won’t be happening for quite some time, I’d imagine.”

Guizhong frowns. “Are you certain?”

“Yes,” Lige nods. Then, in that infuriatingly unchanging cadence of his, “He just lost five of his six heads. I’d be surprised if he regains enough strength to lead an invasion and wage war anytime soon.”

The Lord of the Vortex is one of the oldest gods! One of the most powerful Hydro gods on this side of the ocean! And he just–?

Guizhong gapes at him, “You–?!”

Lige shakes his head. “I claimed two heads. The other three were her work.”

And so saying, the god gestures to the side. At this point, Guizhong finally focuses on the others who’d also been present this entire time –a heavily injured bird spirit who watches the two of them separately, clutching tightly onto an unconscious girl in his arms.

No, not just a girl. That was… another god?

The bird spirit shifts uneasily under Guizhong’s attention. Were it not for his wings being all but shredded, she has no doubt that he would’ve taken flight perhaps the very instant that she’d arrived–

“There’s no place for you and your new god to go to even if you run,” Lige says. “Osial may have been dealt a grievous blow, but his armies remain. His influence stretches wherever the water reaches, and it will be quite some time before the waves subside. You’ll only be endangering the both of you, if you run.”

The bird spirit says nothing in response.

“We’re not going to hurt you,” Guizhong says gently, crouching down to the young spirit’s height. Lige’s words might be a little scary, but Guizhong can read him well enough by this point to know that he’s legitimately concerned for these two. “Let us help you and your god, please?”

The bird spirit still says nothing. But his gaze wavers, flickering between them and the bloodied god that he clutches in his arms.

“I promise that we will not harm you or your god. Come with us to the Guili Assembly, and we will get you treated,” Guizhong tells him. Then, reaching out a hand and pointing towards Lige, “You know who he is, right?”

“… The Groundbreaker.”

“That’s right,” Guizhong says encouragingly. “He’s also the God of Contracts. So if I make a promise before the God of Contracts, then know that my words can be trusted, and that I will not act in bad faith to you or your god, alright?”

[shealtaonmymoda]

I’m defending my oomfie cause they didn’t even say anything that bad lmao. There’s worse people in the enstars fandom who actively doxx and harass people and do you see Meg doing any of that.

Hiyori is inherently a kind person, she gets upset when she’s hated (ie when Jun said she was moping around when she thought Trickstar hated her for Summer Live) so obviously she would care about her friends.

She’s also from a noble family and a part of her persona is caring and looking after the weak. She says this countless times in the stories, she looks after Alkaloid in the main story where they were a newer unit and at risk of being fired, she practically raises Nagisa when they were middle school and she nurtured Jun so he can grow as an idol and person. She even deeply cares about Ibara even though their relationship started off very rocky because she got to know more about Ibara. Absolute is not that great when it comes to being a climax story for Eden but it has Hiyori saying she’s glad Ibara is safe which is a stark difference to calling Ibara Viper instead of her actual name and insulting her.

Hiyori and Eichi are different because while he’s her first friend, you wouldn’t exactly compare them to Hiyori’s other friends because of how strained their relationship is so why would you use this as clear evidence of how she doesn’t care about her friends lmao. Besides she still deeply cares about Eichi and vice versa like when she expressed concerns that he was losing himself in the war, read Altered btw their relationship is not that simple.

The closest example would be how coldly she treated Chiaki in Gourmet Live but she was repeating the joke she made in Saga where she pretends to not know Chiaki despite being classmates on their 1st year and Jun explains she purposefully distanced herself because 4piece is an individual challenge and she doesn’t want to grow attached to the other competitors.

@sunshine-of-my-shoulder want to jump in with more of you Hiyori thoughts?

I’m your friend. And as your friend, I’m going to be honest with you. I don’t care about you or your problems. - Hiyori, Probably

[redbean-nom]

crosshair saying bye to Rebel Omega

@chopper-base i think you wanted to be tagged?

[sillyfudgemonkeys]

Avatar Love talk 3: Game vs Action

Follow up from (and also defending Kyo in this vid)

Yangchen: I plead the fifth on what Kuruk said. No idea why you two think you got your horny ass desires from me. Kyoshi: I'm not the one who sensually listened to the sound of Kavik writing with a pencil, but go off? Yangchen: Again, pleading the fifth! Anyway I still think Kyoshi has the least amount of game. Kyoshi: Really? We're still on this? Can't we talk about something else? Wan: Like your mommy issues? Kyoshi, pushing his face away and knocking him down: Ok, defending my "game" it is. Yangchen: Kyoshi, really, just accept it. You can't flirt for shit. Kyoshi: Again, I don't need to. Yangchen: You keep saying that! How do you expect to get anyone if you can't or don't flirt? Kyoshi: I walk into the room and look at them. Maybe smile, if I'm feeling feisty. Yangchen: That's not going to work- Wan: It worked for you, Yangchen. Yangchen: *deflated* Kyoshi: Oh so it's "flirting" and "super game" if Yangchen does it, but if Kyoshi does it then I'm just lucky? Wow. Hmmm. So fair. Yangchen: Kyoshi, you had two years with Rangi and Yun and I had five minutes with Kavik. We are not the same. Kyoshi: Listen, Yangchen, I think we've got it all wrong. It isn't about game or flirting. It's about action. I know how to get my girl going- Wan: Yangchen knows how to get Kavik going too! Yangchen: SHut UP, Wan! .......Yeah I know how to get Kavik going too, blow steam in his ear, fling him off a bison, what's your point????? Korra: Wait, fling him off a-? Kyoshi: Oh no no, Yangchen. That's not what I mean. You see, I'm probably going to go down in history as "World's best daughter-in-law." Whenever I sincerely talk about how I'm going to take care of Rangi or Hei-Ran, and Rangi melts into a literal puddle at my feet. Korra: So, like, you're amazing moral character is how you flirt? Kyoshi: No, it's not flirting. It's doing. Actions. Like I said before, they like me for who I am. And maybe because I have a good smile too. Kuruk: Being good looking does help. Yangchen: Ugh, where are you going with this? Kyoshi: I'm getting to it. What I want to say is, 'What's so great about having game, when the real measure should be the results?' Yangchen: *rolls eyes* 'Results.' Please, Kyoshi. We all know I had Kavik wrapped around my finger. Kyoshi: So you got with him? Yangchen: I-well uh- Kyoshi: Tell me, Yangchen. Which one of us actually GOT their boo in the end? Hm? Yangchen: .......... Kyoshi: Only actions and outcomes matter, Yangchen. What's so great about your "game" if you can't even "win"? Wan: I haven't seen a burn this severe since that volcano took out Roku. O-O Voice on the phone: 911, what's you're emergency? Korra, on the phone: I just witnessed a murder! I mean both parties are already dead-can the dead die twice?????

[totally-not-an-awkward-okapi]

Well the new Percy Jackson show is making me loose my mind, so I’m resurrecting my PJO ocs + a brand new freak since the original final member of their trio, Dove, is now his own whole thing.

Bonus: here’s all the old doodles of these freaks I could find. “Icky” has always been my favorite, even if I’ve never been settled on her name or anyone else’s.

[decidueyedreamerdetails]

I’ve been wondering something about Rayne’s world. Is it like another dimension, or a different universe entirely? I remember reading that she traveled between worlds. How does she do that?

Also a semi-related question. Do Legendaries in that world function the same as in other worlds? Like do they fulfill the same roles, or do they differ in any way?

Lastly, are Legendaries in your universe(s) immortal? I know that Rayne killed a bunch of them, but would they have died eventually anyway, or are they functionally immortal and can only die by a deliberate act? Is there a special technique you have to use? (I’m not planning on killing any of them I swear)

Sorry if that’s too many questions, I started thinking of more and more as I wrote this XD

What is Rayne’s World?

As a pre-warning I’m going to apologise for my blatant misuse of the word ‘Universe’. I know what it means, and the space and physics loving side of me hates that I’m misusing it, but I cannot think of a better term to explain it, so sorry in advance.

Okay, so to start with I’m going to explain what I consider Universes and Worlds! A Universe is a collection of Worlds (and some inbetween space, such as the Distortion World, Ultra Space, etc) and each Universe only has one Arceus and Creation Trio.

A World, however, is more comparable to the ACTUAL definition of universe - like the one we live in! The Pokémon, Pokémon Mystery Dungeon, and Poképark games would all be three separate Worlds for example! Furthermore, Pokémon Diamond and Pokémon Pearl would always take place in seperate Worlds, due to conflicting events.

Basically, if something would count as an alternate universe or alternate timeline, it’s a new World! If you’ve seen my Toyhouse, Canon Compliant and Hydra’s World (or as we’re calling it here, Rayne’s World) are both different Worlds in the same Universe, whereas Gods and Servants is another Universe entirely!

How does Rayne travel between Worlds?

Well, to answer that, I’m going to have to talk about another character entirely, as Rayne’s story does not begin with herself.

It begins with a Hisuian Decidueye, partner to the main character of Canon Compliant’s events of Pokémon Legends Arceus. This Decidueye is called Tansy, and after the events of PLA, she was frustrated that Arceus did not send her Trainer back to the present, and decided the reasonable course of action would to be to fight Arceus to show them that they were in the wrong.

This did not work, and Tansy was killed by Arceus after a hard battle. Impressed by her strength, however, they decided they could use her to help subdue rogue gods in others Worlds. Tansy was reborn as an Alolan Decidueye, and given a blessing so that she could not truly die - she would instead travel to another World when she was either killed, or subdued the rogue god in that specific World.

However, Tansy eventually stopped enacting Arceus’ will, and yet the god was not ready to lose out on her strength just yet. Tansy’s corpse had remained in Arceus’ realm, and so they decided to make an artificial soul to inhabit it and use its power. A soul that had Tansy’s skills and her blessing, but none of her personality, only a desire to make sure the gods did not step out of line and cause major problems. This being, now inhabiting inside of Tansy’s repaired body, was sent out into a random World to wake up. Initially, they did their job very well, but eventually became jaded by the amount of rogue gods they saw, and decided the obvious solution was to kill all of the gods before they turned rogue.

As I’m sure you will have guessed by now, this being was Rayne, although she is fully unaware of her origins. As far as she knows, she woke up in a field with amnesia, and has always been able to travel between Worlds either through death, or killing the ‘correct’ god.

However, after she became determined to kill every god in the World that we know as Hydra’s World, Arceus limited her blessing, and she was no longer able to travel between Worlds. Instead, she now returns to that same World, after a period of a few days to a few months.

Legendaries in Rayne’s World

Short answer to that; the Legendaries & Mythicals in Rayne’s World are actually recruited from other Worlds, and although they typically have the same powers as the others of their species, in their new World they are expected to be doing the jobs of multiple gods.

Long answer: there were eight gods who travelled to Rayne’s World (a Meloetta, Shaymin, Landorus, Tapu Fini, Hoopa, Celebi, Jirachi and a Yveltal), as well as Lilith the Darkrai, the sole known survivor, due to allying with Rayne. Furthermore, there have been three gods born (a Marshadow named Darci, a Jirachi named Goose, and a Hoopa named Currant) and a single demigod born (Sotis, Rayne’s child), making the total number of divine beings thirteen.

The Jirachi, who is called Shallot, is currently sleeping, but their job was to take the light from Luci’s corpse (a Necrozma who assisted Rayne during the mass deicide, and later betrayed her) and redistribute it. However, some of that light was already used up, leading the world to have shorter days and winters of darkness.

Shamin, Landorus, Celebi and later Goose are in charge of making sure enough plants are growing in the world for food, as winters are extremely cold and lack sunlight, easily killing the majority of plants. Additionally, Landorus is in charge of making sure storms do not become too destructive.

Tapu Fini is in charge of making sure the seas do not become too violent, as well as currently holding the objects housing the souls of Treasures of Ruin to prevent them from reincarnating - their seals did not last forever, and they eventually broke free, causing a lot of death and destruction to a world that is already very sensitive to that. The reason why she was chosen to be the holder of them is that none of them can get access to their element underwater, so they are unable to reform their bodies!

The Yveltal, Mara, and her son Sotis, are effectively performing the role of the full Aura Trio by ensuring both life and death stay in balance, rather than just death, as they normally would as Yveltals. It is their job to monitor how many have died, prevent unnatural revivals or gaining of immortality, and in the worst case scenario deliberately revive Pokémon to avoid their World from completely dying out - humanity is already extinct, as well as a few Pokémon species, and the population is very low in general.

The Hoopa, named Allium, and his daughter Currant, are in charge of obtaining any objects someone may need from another World! Furthermore, if you want to leave this World, you will need to talk to Allium and convince them to use their rings.

As an adult, Darci uses his powers to both deliver messages between the gods, as well as explore the world, both surveying the state it is in and bring anything he finds worrying up to the others, and trying to find items that may be useful! She also provides Z-Crystals, as her body naturally forms them!

Lilith, both due to not being fully trusted due to her past (although is she is trusted far more than Rayne, due to her genuinely being kind, and as far as the other gods are aware, never actually killing another god, only helping Rayne and Lilith plan) and causing nightmares as a Darkrai, does not officially have a job. However, she is often the one the other gods elect to talk to Rayne, as they are close friends.

Meloetta basically works as the overseer of both the gods, making sure no one is having any interpersonal issues (which is very common, unfortunately) and that they are both doing their job and not abusing their powers against mortals (something Rayne has made clear that she will not tolerate). Basically she’s their manager!

Overall, they are doing a LOT more work than they typically should be doing - either by covering domains related to theirs, or a much larger territory than they would usually. It is apparent that the gods are stretched thin, as their World is far less habitable than others, but fortunately the remaining Pokémon have adapted to these harsh conditions!

Legendary/Mythical Immortality

Arceus and the Creation Trio are the only ones who are truly immortal in every sense of the word, as they are less living beings and more part of the Universe itself, and need to uphold its order.

However, Mythicals and Legendaries lifespan range from long-lived to immortal to being able to revive themselves! They are all able to be killed, but how difficult a task that is depends on who you are killing, especially if you need them to stay dead.

Generally, Mythicals tend to only be long-lived, and will eventually die by natural causes, whereas Legendaries are immortal and have to be killed by outside means.

You’re correct in that some of them do need a special method to be truly killed though! Victini, due to being the Victory Pokémon, is very hard to kill in direct battle, as that is a situation where there is a winner and a loser. However, indirect confrontation, such as poisoning or natural hazards, would circumvent that issue!

Furthermore, Xerneas and Yveltal have to be killed twice to avoid them simply reviving themselves, by destroying their tree and cocoon respectively.

Most of them, however, only require you to be strong.

Thank you for asking all of these questions by the way! It’s nice to know what may need elaborated on explanation wise, and all of your questions I have genuinely thought about before!

[leslieseveride]

if they pull a sitch where either tim or lucy are waiting on the other at the restaurant they agreed to meet at thinking they've been stood up when in reality their bleeding out and hanging on by a thread i will seriously douse myself in gasoline and set myself on fire.

[nothorses]

thinking about how my mom spent like 2 years getting downright vicious about the houseless folks who were camping in the woods past her house (to the point of getting a BB rifle that looked like a real fucking gun to threaten them with when they crossed in front of her house??) and justifying it with White Lady Fear a la "what if one of them does something to me! I am but a helpless white woman living all alone!!" and like...

y'all, she terrorized those people. every single time she saw someone outside, she was riling her dog up to bark, waving a gun in their faces (that for all intents & purposes they certainly thought was real), yelling at them, calling the cops (thank god the 2 rural-ass cops didn't actually give a shit), etc.

and she justified it with fears of womanly fragility & inability to defend herself, and I believe how afraid she was! she talked about fearing they would break into her house at night and sexually assault her, and I believe she was legitimately afraid of that. she's been victimized in many of the ways she was afraid of being victimized by them.

the thing is that it doesn't matter how real the fear is.

nothing ever happened, nobody ever tried to threaten her, nobody tried to break in, nobody even approached her. she initiated every single interaction. when she told them not to go through her yard, they did the best they could to respect that without giving up their camping spot; which was on someone else's property, who didn't mind them being there (not to mention one of them is actually indigenous to this specific land!)

she was a thousand times more threatening to those people than they ever were to her, but her fear of them was still real. and that's exactly what made her so dangerous.

I need cis women to internalize this ASAP. your fear is real, and it can and will hurt others. your fear is real, and it is harmful. your fear is real, and your hurt is not deserved, and you still need to grow & heal & prevent it from causing harm.

[ravencromwell]

I have to add Archivist Wasp and its sequel Latchkey by Nicole Kornher-Stace. (Both those links lead to Weightless Books, an arm of the incomparable Small Beer Press that sells drm-free versions of numerous small presses' books for ease of reading and to avoid the amazon monster; to tout the awesome of Small Beer and Mythic Delirium, both primarily responsbiel for publishing Kornher-Stace would be a post of its own, but look them up if you're unfamiliar because they've provided some of the most envelope-pushing, queer-heavy scifi of the last decade.) Archivist Wasp is in the "destroyed earth" rather than the space category of scifi and...well, Amal El Mohtar can sell it better than I ever could:

An Archivist has two jobs. The first is to hunt and catch ghosts in order to learn about the precataclysm past from them; the second is to defend her life and position against “upstarts” — the other girls marked by the goddess Catchkeep’s claw-shaped scars at birth — once a year. Wasp has been Archivist for three years, and wants nothing more than to escape a dismal life of killing her sisters and obeying the Catchkeep-priest — so when an unusually powerful ghost asks her to help find his former partner in the underworld, she agrees. But, as is so often the case with the underworld, she finds both more and less than she bargained for. More than anything else, this book is sharp. You could cut yourself on the prose — Wasp’s world is one of thorns, knives, edges of thick, broken glass, a constant background-hum of pain that sometimes swells into a shout. Wasp’s perspective absolutely thrums with tension and violence, but also aches with a fierce, hollow loneliness to break the heart. The longing and gratitude for the smallest beginnings of true friendship make the betrayals more vicious, and the stakes just keep rising. I burned through this book in about three hours, desperately rooting for her. It’s also a brilliantly constructed narrative and world. The gods are cruel and absent. The underworld is a maze in layers, a twisting, turning palimpsest, one that allows Wasp to descend almost archaeologically through time by literally experiencing her ghost-partner’s memories. The pre- and post-apocalyptic worlds reflect each other in shards and fragments, all the more powerful for being subtle, for their resistance to being spelled out. It was also keenly refreshing — especially in something that’s ostensibly YA, where the Love Triangle of Doom is so annoyingly pervasive — to find a book in which all of the strongest, primary relationships are friendships; where friendship has the narrative, motive force usually reserved for sexualized romance. I very much wanted to see the A in QUILTBAG represented in this column, and this is a fine example: while the connection between the ghost and his (female) partner is intense and loving, it is never represented as sexual, and sex is in fact completely irrelevant.

Sci-fi books where a queer woman has the ghost of an annoying dead guy in her head

*Misery is nonbinary (she/they) and who’s in her head is not dead or a guy but I’m counting it, okay

[our-lady-of-mcr]

.

[autistichalsin]

In retrospect, four years later, I feel like the Isabel Fall incident was just the biggest ignored cautionary tale modern fandom spaces have ever had. Yes, it wasn't limited to fandom, it was also a professional author/booktok type argument, but it had a lot of crossover.

Stop me if you've heard this one before: a writer, whether fan or pro, publishes a work. If one were to judge a book by its cover, something we are all taught in Kindergarten shouldn't happen but has a way of occurring regardless, one might find that there was something that seemed deeply problematic about this work. Maybe the title or summary alluded to something Wrong happening, or maybe the tags indicated there was problematic kinks or relationships. And that meant the story was Bad. So, a group of people takes to the Twittersphere to inform everyone who will listen why the work, and therefore the author, are Bad. The author, receiving an avalanche of abuse and harassment, deactivates their account, and checks into a mental health facility for monitoring for suicidal ideation. They never return to their writing space, and the harassers get a slap on the wrist (if that- usually they get praise and high-fives all around) and start waiting for their next victim to transgress.

Sounds awful familiar, doesn't it?

Isabel Fall's case, though, was even more extreme for many reasons. See, she made the terrible mistake of using a transphobic meme as the genesis to actually explore issues of gender identity.

More specifically, she used the phrase "I sexually identify as an attack helicopter" to examine how marginalized identities, when they become more accepted, become nothing more than a tool for the military-industrial complex to rebrand itself as a more personable and inclusive atrocity; a chance to pursue praise for bombing brown children while being progressive, because queer people, too, can help blow up brown children now! It also contained an examination of identity and how queerness is intrinsic to a person, etc.

But... well, if harassers ever bothered to read the things they critique, we wouldn't be here, would we? So instead, they called Isabel a transphobic monster for the title alone, even starting a misinformation campaign to claim she was, in fact, a cis male nazi using a fake identity to psyop the queer community.

A few days later, after days of horrific abuse and harassment, Isabel requested that Clarkesworld magazine pull the story. She checked in to a psych ward with suicidal thoughts. That wasn't all, though; the harassment was so bad that she was forced to out herself as trans to defend against the claims.

Only... we know this type of person, the fandom harassers, don't we? You know where this is going. Outing herself did nothing to stop the harassment. No one was willing to read the book, much less examine how her sexuality and gender might have influenced her when writing it.

So some time later, Isabel deleted her social media. She is still alive, but "Isabel Fall" is not- because the harassment was so bad that Isabel detransitioned/closeted herself, too traumatized to continue living her authentic life.

Supposed trans allies were so outraged at a fictional portrayal of transness, written by a trans woman, that they harassed a real life trans woman into detransitioning.

It's heartbreakingly familiar, isn't it? Many of us in fandom communities have been in Isabel's shoes, even if the outcome wasn't so extreme (or in some cases, when it truly was). Most especially, many of us, as marginalized writers speaking from our own experiences in some way, have found that others did not enjoy our framework for examining these things, and hurt us, members of those identities, in defense of "the community" as a nebulous undefined entity.

There's a quote that was posted in a news writeup about the whole saga that was published a year after the fact. The quote is:

The delineation between paranoid and reparative readings originated in 1995, with influential critic Eve Kosofsky Sedgwick. A paranoid reading focuses on what’s wrong or problematic about a work of art. A reparative reading seeks out what might be nourishing or healing in a work of art, even if the work is flawed. Importantly, a reparative reading also tends to consider what might be nourishing or healing in a work of art for someone who isn’t the reader. This kind of nuance gets completely worn away on Twitter, home of paranoid readings. “[You might tweet], ‘Well, they didn’t discuss X, Y, or Z, so that’s bad!’ Or, ‘They didn’t’ — in this case — ‘discuss transness in a way that felt like what I feel about transness, therefore it is bad.’ That flattens everything into this very individual, very hostile way of reading,” Mandelo says. “Part of reparative reading is trying to think about how a story cannot do everything. Nothing can do everything. If you’re reading every text, fiction, or criticism looking for it to tick a bunch of boxes — like if it represents X, Y, and Z appropriately to my definitions of appropriate, and if it’s missing any of those things, it’s not good — you’re not really seeing the close focus that it has on something else.”

A paranoid reading describes perfectly what fandom culture has become in the modern times. It is why "proship", once simply a word for common sense "don't engage with what you don't like, and don't harass people who create it either" philosophies, has become the boogeyman of fandom, a bad and dangerous word. The days of reparative readings, where you would look for things you enjoyed, are all but dead. Fiction is rarely a chance to feel joy; it's an excuse to get angry, to vitriolically attack those different from oneself while surrounded with those who are the same as oneself. It's an excuse to form in-groups and out-groups that must necessarily be in a constant state of conflict, lest it come across like This side is accepting That side's faults. In other words, fandom has become the exact sort of space as the nonfandom spaces it used to seek to define itself against.

It's not about joy. It's not about resonance with plot or characters. It's about hate. It's about finding fault. If they can't find any in the story, they will, rest assured, create it by instigating fan wars- dividing fandom into factions and mercilessly attacking the other.

And that's if they even went so far as to read the work they're critiquing. The ones they don't bother to read, as you saw above, fare even worse. If an AO3 writer tagged an abuser/victim ship, it's bad, it's fetishism, even if the story is about how the victim escapes. If a trans writer uses the title "I Sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter" to find a framework to dissect rainbow-washing the military-industrial complex, it's unforgivable. It's a cesspool of kneejerk reactions, moralizing discomfort, treating good/evil as dichotomous categories that can never be escaped, and using that complex as an excuse to heap harassment on people who "deserve it." Because once you are Bad, there is no action against you that is too Bad for you to deserve.

Isabel Fall's story follows this so step-by-step that it's like a textbook case study on modern fandom behavior.

Isabel Fall wrote a short story with an inflammatory title, with a genesis in transphobic mockery, in the hopes of turning it into a genuine treatise on the intersection of gender and sexuality and the military-industrial complex. But because audiences are unprepared for the idea of inflammatory rhetoric as a tool to force discomfort to then force deeper introspection... they zeroed in on the discomfort. "I Sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter"- the title phrase, not the work- made them uncomfortable. We no longer teach people how to handle discomfort; we live in a world of euphemism and glossing over, a world where people can't even type out the words "kill" and rape", instead substituting "unalive" and "grape." We don't deal with uncomfortable feelings anymore; we censor them, we transform them, we sanitize them. When you are unable to process discomfort, when you are never given self-soothing tools, your only possible conclusion is that anything Uncomfortable must be Bad, and the creator must either be censored too, or attacked into conformity so that you never again experience the horrors of being Uncomfortable.

So the masses took to Twitter, outraged. They were Uncomfortable, and that de facto meant that they had been Wronged. Because the content was related to trans identity issues, that became the accusation; it was transphobic, inherently. It couldn't be a critique of bigger and more fluid systems than gender identity alone; it was a slight against trans people. And no amount of explanations would change their minds now, because they had already been aggrieved and made to feel Uncomfortable.

Isabel Fall was now a Bad Person, and we all know what fandom spaces do to Bad People. Bad People, because they are Bad, will always be deserving of suicide bait and namecalling and threatening. Once a person is Bad, there is no way to ever become Good again. Not by refuting the accusations (because the accusations are now self-evident facts; "there is a callout thread against them" is its own tautological proof that wrongdoing has happened regardless of the veracity of the claims in the callout) and not by apologizing and changing, because if you apologize and admit you did the Bad thing, you are still Bad, and no matter what you do in future, you were once Bad and that needs to be brought up every time you are mentioned. If you are bad, you can NEVER be more than what you were at your worst (in their definition) moment. Your are now ontologically evil, and there is no action taken against you that can be immoral.

So Isabel was doomed, naturally. It didn't matter that she outed herself to explain that she personally had lived the experience of a trans woman and could speak with authority on the atrocity of rainbow-washing the military industrial complex as a proaganda tool to capture progressives. None of it mattered. She had written a work with an Uncomfortable phrase for a title, the readers were Uncomfortable, and someone had to pay for it.

And that's the key; pay for it. Punishment. Revenge. It's never about correcting behavior. Restorative justice is not in this group's vocabulary. You will, incidentally, never find one of these folks have a stance against the death penalty; if you did Bad as a verb, you are Bad as an intrinsic, inescapable adjective, and what can you do to incorrigible people but kill them to save the Normal people? This is the same principle, on a smaller scale, that underscores their fandom activities; if a Bad fan writes Bad fiction, they are a Bad person, and their fandom persona needs to die to save Normal fans the pain of feeling Uncomfortable.

And that's what happened to Isabel Fall. The person who wrote the short story is very much alive, but the pseudonym of Isabel Fall, the identity, the lived experiences coming together in concert with imagination to form a speculative work to critique deeply problematic sociopolitical structures? That is dead. Isabel Fall will never write again, even if by some miracle the person who once used the name does. Even if she ever decides to restart her transition, she will be permanently scarred by this experience, and will never again be able to share her experience with us as a way to grow our own empathy and challenge our understanding of the world. In spirit, but not body, fandom spaces murdered Isabel Fall.

And that's... fandom, anymore. That's just what is done, routinely and without question, to Bad people. Good people are Good, so they don't make mistakes, and they never go too far when dealing with Bad people. And Bad people, well, they should have thought before they did something Bad which made them Bad people.

Isabel Fall's harassment happened in early 2020, before quarantine started, but it was in so many ways a final chance for fandom to hit the breaks. A chance for fandom to think collectively about what it wanted to be, who it wanted to be for and how it wanted to do it. And fandom looked at this and said, "more, please." It continues to harass marginalized people, especially fans of color and queen fans, into suffering mental breakdowns. With gusto.

Any ideas of reparative reading is dead. Fandom runs solely on paranoid readings. And so too is restorative justice gone for fandom transgressions, real or imagined. It is now solely about punitive, vigilante justice. It's a concerted campaign to make sure oddballs conform or die (in spirit, but sometimes even physically given how often mentally ill individuals are pushed into committing suicide).

It's a deeply toxic environment and I'm sad to say that Isabel Fall's story was, in retrospect, a sort of event horizon for the fandom. The gravitational pull of these harassment campaigns is entirely too strong now and there is no escaping it. I'm sorry, I hate to say something so bleak, but thinking the last few days about the state of fandom (not just my current one but also others I watch from the outside), I just don't think we can ever go back to peaceful "for joy" engagement, not when so many people are determined to use it as an outlet for lateral aggression against other people.

[saeist]

what are we? ── bakugo k. (1.4k)⊹ ࣪ ˖ part two

"so.. who here has a secret boyfriend we don't know about?" mina asks the first thing that came to mind not even a minute after this impromptu slumber party that's currently held in yaoyorozu's room

after a long week of training and pro hero studies, you lot decided to why not unwind by having a little sleepover at one of the girls' rooms. yaoyorozu was kind enough to volunteer to hold it in her room as she has never experienced sleepovers with others

you all looked at each other with curiosity. curious if anyone was actually in a committed relationship that the class didn't know about. not like it was their business or anything..

"what? nobody? that's kinda hard to believe.." hagakure comments, genuinely surprised since usually at this age where everyone is in high school, you're bound to get into relationships

"i mean it's like we have the time to mingle around since we're busy with training and on top of that, trying to keep afloat with our academics" tsuyu points out, a finger on her chin as she recalls if anyone actually had free time to spare amidst all the chaos your class has been through

hearing what tsuyu said, mina whines, dramatically flailing her arms around

"ugh i hate that what you said is true, tsuyu-chan.. but what about crushes! do you guys have a crush on anyone in class or anyone in ua?" mina continues to bombard everyone with questions related to romance. to you it almost feels targeted because you're not too sure if she knows something about you

"crushes?" uraraka trails off. all of a sudden she shakes her head vigorously.

"what's wrong uraraka-chan?" tsuyu asks, worried

"oh my god! are you crushing on someone?!" hagakure squeals, "you have someone in mind don't you!"

the girls (minus you, tsuyu and yaoyorozu) start to bombard her with questions

"is it midoriya?!"

"is it iida?!"

"who?!"

"it's nobody!" uraraka defends herself, shaking her hands around. mina pouts but drops the subject.

you didn't even realize that you were holding in your breath til jirou points it out

"what's with the sigh of relief, y/n?" jirou pokes your side jokingly.

wrong move on your part

suddenly there was a certain glint on mina's eyes. like you just walked into her trap

"you haven't said anything since we started talking about crushes, y/n-chan.. anyone in mind?" mina grins mischievously.

"no one" you say abruptly but it turns out your own body betrays you. you can literally feel the heat creeping up to your cheeks

"oh my god she's blushing! WHO! IS IT IN OUR CLASS OR CLASS B? WHO?! WE NEED TO KNOW" hagakure squeals in joy, suddenly clasping your hands together as she shakes you

"it's nobody you guys-"

"i've been meaning to ask, y/n-san.. if there's anything going on between you and bakugo-san" yaoyorozu speaks up for the first time tonight

mina and hagakure both scream in delight

"what makes you say that, yaomomo?" you ask, trying to calm your heartbeat at the mention of the boy you think you're seeing..

you and bakugo had a weird, for lack of better word, "relationship" going on at the moment. one would call it a situationship but you're still not 100% sure if it's even heading to that direction

it all started after the provisional license exams. the same night where he and deku had a brawl at ground beta. right after bakugo and deku got dismissed by aizawa, you bumped into him in the kitchen. obviously scared out of your wits that he was looking all beaten up, you brought him to the nearest bathroom to clean his cuts and bruises

since then you and him had found yourselves in this weird "relationship". sure, he's still the same bakugo you first met during the first day of classes. always brash and rowdy but when it was only the two of you.. he was.. a littler calmer than usual

to others, he was his usual explosive self but when it came to you, his tone would be a little softer. still, it's still rough around the edges but the subtle change is noticeable if you were a close friend of his

overtime, you and bakugo slowly became touchy with each other. there were lingering stares, lingering touches when you two were paired up to spar during training and what not

obviously with this sudden change of attitude towards you, the whole class noticed it. why were you getting treated differently by the king explosion god himself?

and before you even noticed it, you found yourself almost by his side at all times in the dorms. may it be in the kitchen where you're basically his second in command when he was in charge of cooking, in the lounge whenever everyone decides to have a little movie marathon or a little celebration, literally everywhere to the point everyone had made assumptions that you two have something going on

have you guys said anything about your little situation? no

have you guys shared a kiss? maybe

have you guys been caught holding hands? definitely. on multiple occasions

but nobody dared to question it. or else they would've been blown away by boom boom boy himself.

that is until, the girls found an opening which was tonight at yaoyorozu's room, in the middle of your slumber party

"i didn't mean to eavesdrop that one time but i overheard you giving him your notes when he was under house arrest for a few days" yaoyorozu sheepishly admits. she suddenly clasps her hands together and bows as she spews apologies for eavesdropping that one time

and like a domino effect, it seems like all the girls have noticed something about the two of you all along

"that reminds me! when we were practicing for the school festival, one time i saw bakugo teaching y/n how to play drums!" jirou quips

"did you guys notice the look on bakugo's face during the joint training with class 1-b when she got hit by gevaudan?! he was pissed!" uraraka adds

"don't think we didn't notice the look you have on your face whenever bakugo comes home from their remedial classes" hagakure teases

"god i've been dying to know! kirishima keeps telling me that he hears bakugo laughing to himself late at night at times now it's all clicking!" mina gushes

all this time you thought you and bakugo hid it well. then again it's like you two even had the chance to properly talk about whatever you two have going on

"so what do you have to say for yourself, y/n-chan? or cat got your tongue?" mina teases, nudging your shoulder

all the girls lean forward, awaiting for your answer

"... we're friends- yeah that's right! we're just friends you guys" you say awkwardly, scratching the back of your head as a nervous habit to top it all off

mina and hagakure don't buy it

"that's not very nice of you to deny your boyfriend like that" mina teases, poking you multiple times in hopes you break (you almost do)

not wanting to say anything else that could potentially jinx whatever you have going on with the blonde, you shrug. it might be a little embarrassing on your end to admit that you and the infamous bakugo katsuki were in a little dilemma you call a situationship

sensing that you weren't gonna budge anytime soon, mina moves on with the subject. talking about what quirks they wished they have from the class

you took this time to pull out your phone and send a little update to your.. friend

[9:24PM] you: so the girls asked me if i had a boyfriend.. [9:24PM] kitkats: and what did u say?? [9:25PM] you: i said no lol cus i dont have one [9:26PM] kitkats: ?? [9:26PM] kitkats: so am i just an arm accessory now or?

right before you were able to reply back, mina snatches your phone from your hands.

"no texting during the slumber party!" she yells, before taking a peek at who you're messaging

"give it back, mina!" you scream, trying to get your phone back to prevent her from reading what seems to be a new message from bakugo

"oh my god it's bakugo! wait let me send him a pic so he won't disturb our party" she squeals, taking a quick selfie of everyone with you looking all stressed out

"and.. sent!" she smiles proudly. after what seems like torture (it was only a few seconds) mina tosses your phone back to your hands before continuing on whatever you guys were talking about

not even a minute later, bakugo replies

[9:30PM] kitkats: raccoon eyes you better not set yn up with someone else when im literally right fuckin' here