#she apologized to me....
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I love how mqf's oficial description is something like: a good heart who wants to help others but then you read the novel and his reaction to lqg trapping ten infected men who are crying in panic is "great now I can start to work in my experiments with decomposed people to find a cure" and gets out a lot of needles, which makes the man cry even harder.
Even if we only get bits of the other Cang Qiong sect leader's we can reach the conclusion that no one there is normal, sqq is just biased.
#the other sects when they have to invite cang qiong: they're our brothers but for fuck's sake they're so weird#sqq is a drama queen married to the demon lord#lqg is an obsessed fighter with no survival instics#sqh is a spy married to ANOTHER demon that somehow is still in the sect doing taxes#qqq could kill you with a look but she also makes fun of tiny lbh in the extras#you know the emperor#so she has probably zero survival instics too#mqf is one step away from becoming a mad doctor#and they're lead by the n°1 apologizer#i love them let me meet the rest#svsss#scum villain self saving system#mu qingfang#liu qingge#shen qingqiu
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nevermind i figured out how to draw her
#have you read the book of bill. go read it#rare double post because i feel like it#this is like the funniest thing ever to me#You All Know What Shes “Apologizing” For.#art#murder drones#murder drones skyn#murder drones flesha#murder drones cyn#potential gore warning#still dont know which tag to use for that sorry
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sometimes. i just have to remind myself that percy took annabeth to paris. like, canonically. he forgot their one-month anniversary. and took his girl to paris to make up for it. the standards are in elysium.
#because listen#hijack a quest and crossed the country to save her#burned himself alive to save her#returned from literal paradise because he didn't want to be away from her#turn down literal fucking godhood to live out his natural life with her#but this??#this is the moment annabeth knew she scored#annabeth 'my man forgot our one-month anniversary and took me to paris to apologize' chase#percy jackon and the olympians#pjo text post#pjo#percy jackson#annabeth chase#percabeth#percabeth fluff#percabeth being the cutest couple to ever not exist#percy is devoted to this girl#she has him wrapped around her finger#and she knows it
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so one of the things that's so horrifying about birth control is that you have to, like, navigate this incredibly personal choice about your body and yet also face the epitome of misogyny. like, someone in the comments will say it wasn't that bad for me, and you'll be utterly silenced. like, everyone treats birth control like something that's super dirty. like, you have no fucking information or control over this thing because certain powerful people find it icky.
first it was the oral contraceptives. you went on those young, mostly for reasons unrelated to birth control - even your dermatologist suggested them to control your acne. the list of side effects was longer than your arm, and you just stared at it, horrified.
it made you so mentally ill, but you just heard that this was adulthood. that, yes, there are of course side effects, what did you expect. one day you looked up yasmin makes me depressed because surely this was far too intense, and you discovered that over 12,000 lawsuits had been successfully filed against the brand. it remains commonly prescribed on the open market. you switched brands a few times before oral contraceptives stopped being in any way effective. your doctor just, like, shrugged and said you could try a different brand again.
and the thing is that you're a feminist. you know from your own experience that birth control can be lifesaving, and that even when used for birth control - it is necessary healthcare. you have seen it save so many people from such bad situations, yourself included. it is critical that any person has access to birth control, and you would never suggest that we just get rid of all of it.
you were a little skeeved out by the implant (heard too many bad stories about it) and figured - okay, iud. it was some of the worst pain you've ever fucking experienced, and you did it with a small number of tylenol in your system (3), like you were getting your bikini line waxed instead of something practically sewn into your body.
and what's wild is that because sometimes it isn't a painful insertion process, it is vanishingly rare to find a doctor that will actually numb the area. while your doctor was talking to you about which brand to choose, you were thinking about the other ways you've been injured in your life. you thought about how you had a suspicious mole frozen off - something so small and easy - and how they'd numbed a huge area. you thought about when you broke your wrist and didn't actually notice, because you'd thought it was a sprain.
your understanding of pain is that how the human body responds to injury doesn't always relate to the actual pain tolerance of the person - it's more about how lucky that person is physically. maybe they broke it in a perfect way. maybe they happened to get hurt in a place without a lot of nerve endings. some people can handle a broken femur but crumble under a sore tooth. there's no true way to predict how "much" something actually hurts.
in no other situation would it be appropriate for doctors to ignore pain. just because someone can break their wrist and not feel it doesn't mean no one should receive pain meds for a broken wrist. it just means that particular person was lucky about it. it should not define treatment.
in the comments of videos about IUDs, literally thousands of people report agony. blinding, nauseating, soul-crushing agony. they say things like i had 2 kids and this was the worst thing i ever experienced or i literally have a tattoo on my ribs and it felt like a tickle. this thing almost killed me or would rather run into traffic than ever feel that again.
so it's either true that every single person who reports severe pain is exaggerating. or it's true that it's far more likely you will experience pain, rather than "just a pinch." and yet - there's nothing fucking been done about it. it kind of feels like a shrug is layered on top of everything - since technically it's elective, isn't it kind of your fault for agreeing to select it? stop being fearmongering. stop being defensive.
you fucking needed yours. you are almost weirdly protective of it. yours was so important for your physical and mental health. it helped you off hormonal birth control and even started helping some of your symptoms. it still fucking hurt for no fucking reason.
once while recovering from surgery, they offered you like 15 days of vicodin. you only took 2 of them. you've been offered oxy for tonsillitis. you turned down opioids while recovering from your wisdom tooth extraction. everything else has the option. you fucking drove yourself home after it, shocked and quietly weeping, feeling like something very bad had just happened. the nurse that held your hand during the experience looked down at you, tears in her eyes, and said - i know. this is cruelty in action.
and it's fucked up because the conversation is never just "hey, so the way we are doing this is fucking barbaric and doctors should be required to offer serious pain meds" - it's usually something around the lines of "well, it didn't kill you, did it?"
you just found out that removing that little bitch will hurt just as bad. a little pinch like how oral contraceptives have "some" serious symptoms. like your life and pain are expendable or not really important. like maybe we are all hysterical about it?
hysteria comes from the latin word for uterus, which is great!
you stand here at a crossroads. like - this thing is so important. did they really have to make it so fucking dangerous. and why is it that if you make a complaint, you're told - i didn't even want you to have this in the first place. we're told be careful what you wish for. we're told that it's our fault for wanting something so illict; we could simply choose not to need medication. that maybe if we don't like the scraps, we should get ready to starve.
we have been saying for so long - "i'm not asking you to remove the option, i'm asking you to reconsider the risk." this entire time we hear: well, this is what you wanted, isn't it?
#where's the word woman in this u might wonder if u suck#good news i am nonbinary and have a uterus so that is something that can happen#im also gender fluid tho which means im immune to certain psychic damage bc if u call me a woman i'll be like <3 okay <3#writeblr#the tightrope of ''ppl need access to this''#and like also#''what the fuck is going on over there'' is like. so difficult as an activist#i was <3 punctured <3 during mine#and almost bled out on the table :) they didn't have anyone standing by bc it's ''just a little insertion''#so i started crashing and i vaguely remember apologizing for the fuss as i heard my heart rate monitor start going <3 tachycardic <3#she wasn't even a bad doctor tbh#ps btw the reason i even HAD a heart monitor is that i have a genuine heart condition and they knew GOING IN that there was a chance#i'd crash on the table#like my heart just likes to do fun little tricks and <3 stop working <3 (i do not want to discuss the specifics ty i am okay im ontop of it#and they were like 'oh u will be fine' and then she did do a puncture thru my uterus . pop!#and im sitting there dizzy and feeling my heartrate start to drop bc it feels almost. beautiful. like. the whole ground just#woosh! out from under you. and shit is like grey's anatomy. i'm looking up at her grey eyes#she's old she wears this nice shawl she's like got Cool Lesbian vibes and people are sprinting into the room#from other parts of the clinic unrelated to me. while the monitor is like a little aria singing#and shes like hey youre okay stay awake stay with me something went wrong we have to keep trying#and i remember thinking - i was trying to think of nice things. i have so many beautiful places that now overlap#with this terrible memory#i became dimly aware that there was too much on her wrists and hands. like#that was too many liters#and then when they had finished all this. i packed up and drove myself home#i have had (bad thing) happen to me. and the same feeling happened after#that numb almost lamblike bleating. you cry without noise. like. ur body is so shocked and ur mind so empty#you just stare at the road and everything everything is happening behind glass and static and you are standing so far away from it#while you hold ur hands at 10 and 2. and something in ur brain is SCREAMING at you - IT WAS BAD AND IT SHOULDNT HAVE HAPPENED#and ur just watching the alarms in your body going off and youre thinking. a little pinch! ha. i think i just lost something important.
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I am feeling a way about Aelwyn continually inviting Adane to hang out at her apartment even though it's a disaster area with her ten ornery cats and scattered microwave dinner trays. I know a part of that is Brennan just wanting a reason to show the audience the very funny contrast from, "I came here to fuck!" to "Nooo Hector :(" But there's also something to her being like, "I want you here with me even though it will entirely ruin any possible remaining mystique around my cool girl persona"--something she absolutely still cares about in a general sense as she tells Adaine not to tell Fabian anyone else about what her apartment is like. It's one thing to be nice, but it's another to be vulnerable, especially when you've been raised in such a way that every weakness was used as a future attack--so much so that her entire brand of magic is protecting herself and not being vulnerable.
#dimension 20#fantasy high#adaine abernant#aelwyn abernant#d20#spoilers#not gonna apologize for all the abernant posting#bc I've been waiting for this for YEARS#this is my oscars#anyway I love it when a bit is anchored in like character development#fy aelwyn would have NEVER let adaine see her being this uncool#now she's like pleassssse visit me I miss you
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nsbu fans listen to me, listen, most of the cast hasn't had an Ify moment yet where they talk directly to their ?? alter egos?? and before we see dynamics unfold with other characters I need everyone to consider: Liv and Kingskin as unwilling father and his newfound ride or die child trope that is all
#I know I can't be the only one thinking about it#Give me huge dangerous mob boss firmly telling Liv she needs to get a spine and stop letting people push her around#reminding her she has an entire mob at her disposal and to keep herself safe she should be maximizing#how many other people are willing to die for her/kingskin#do you see the vision people#Someone tell Liv she's allowed to take up space and make decisions for herself based on what SHE wants without apologizing#I just think it would b neat ok#is he a dangerous mob boss with a violent streak and a potential drug problem?#yes but he could also be father shaped if I believe hard enough#never stop blowing up#d20 never stop blowing up#dimension 20 nsbu#nsbu#liv skyler#kingskin
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People on Twitter are all posting “oooh there seems to be some romantic / sexual tension between Viktor and Jayce in the new season”
THE TENSION WAS THERE SINCE THE SECOND THEY WALKED INTO THAT MF LAB !!!
#i apologize to my followers who are receiving my influx of arcane posts#this is my friend’s fault she made me watch it#arcane#viktor#jayce talis#jayvik
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the worst injury shepard received since the war ended
#drawlings#shakarian#brought to you by: tried to kiss my dog goodnight at the same time she decided she wanted to lick my face#and clocked me right in the nose with her hard little dog head#so i did this. and now i'm going to bed. i will not apologize for the quality
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When Solas says
"I was trying to determine some way to show you what you mean to me."
and
"For now, the best gift I can offer is the truth."
it makes me cry SO MUCH because that "for now" really implies he was planning ahead, that he was hoping Lavellan would accept his full identity, and they would stay together.
That "for now" means he already had more gifts in mind, more ways to show her what she meant to him. In that moment, in that glade, under those circumstances, he could only give her the truth she deserved - so words, knowledge, love and respect in the form of a spoken revelation -, but what about later? What was his next gift to her going to be? Something tangible, like a love memento, something precious to wear and show everyone? More knowledge and wisdom to share with her? Memories and scenes from his old life?
Weekes said Solas was ready to tell her the truth, forget about his duty, and lose himself in Lavellan, but chickened out at the last second. So I'm really curious to know what kind of future he envisioned in those blissful last moments before he lost his courage - what other presents and displays of love he was ready to give to her.
#dragon age#da:i#solas#solavellan#also i wonder how he planned that whole conversation#probably repeating his lines over and over again#hoping she would understand and accept him#and then what?#forget about the orb and the veil and apologize for everything?#or hoping she would agree with his goals?#and then bam#he realizes he can't do that to her#“then you would carry the same burden i do”#“i cannot do that to you vhenan”#AAAAAAH THE WAIT...... IT'S KILLING ME
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Cringe garbage that I despise how it turned out
#south park#sp fanart#wendy testaburger#bebe stevens#nichole daniels#heidi turner#my art#this is my formal apology for never drawin the girls#not that this makes up for it since im pissed as fuck with how it turned out#whatever though#this is bebe's place n she dont clean for shit#she moved out early so eveyone loves crashin at her pad#also wanna apologize to the chicks that follow me-#i think i make girls really stereotypical n i genuinely feel bad about that#if anyone has suggestions on how i could improve that please lmk
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well, I can't say I expected the new chapter to feature Idia (metaphorically) going to (metaphorical) hell, getting a pep talk from his (metaphorical) Phantom brother which helps him finally move on once and for all from his brother's death, and (metaphorically) overblotting again to fight his way back out of (metaphorical) hell, only to have his darkest fear (non-metaphorically) come true when his mom goes through his computer and finds all his secret files. but I am glad it did!
also this is all a flashback for the purpose of explaining to our group what the heck is going on (whether or not any of it is getting through is another matter)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 chapter 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 chapter 7 spoilers#it's okay she said she didn't look in the password-protected folders#your secret recipes are safe#what's up guys it's IDIA TIME#red idia. redia. is this anything#(my thoughts are all over the place so this is not going to be comprehensible sorry in advance)#woooooo and his character arc is resolved!!!!#including my new favorite shroudbros interaction#idia: ortho i need to apologize for how much i must have hurt you --#ortho: whatever niisan i went to SPACE#they're so stupid. i love them so much.#not to mention idia starting to realize something is up when he pulls 3 ssrs no problem#(stares at 3 currently-running ssr pickups) twst is mocking me personally#aw man though! i forget if he had that line before about crimson muscle coming to his entrance ceremony or if that's new#either way i think that's sweet!#there's been a bit of a running subplot that idia actually really does want to be friends irl#but is too shy/anxious and convinced crimson would hate him immediately if they ever met#so idk. it was kind of a throwaway line but it still got me! when are he and lilia gonna meet for reals :(#(this will definitely involve makeovers) (this is not how idia expected their friendship to go but he has no choice now)
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Colourblind Fiyero
I'm sure I'm not the first person to have this idea but I thought of this literally half-asleep at 1 AM and bolted up to note it down.
Anyway what if movie!Fiyero is red/green colourblind and when he and Feldspar almost run over Elphaba, he doesn't see the Elphaba on the left, but the one on the right? reblog if u think the girl on the left is j-
And the reason he looks like this when he sees her face:
... is not because he is realising it's too late to stop himself from saying the words "blended in with the foliage" to the green girl, but because he has two eyes and a heart and just saw Cynthia Erivo in the woods. (And Feldspar sure as shit doesn't notice anything either because horses cannot see red and he is used to people looking kinda green.)
Fiyero arrives at Shiz well after everyone sings a song about how green and annyoing Elphaba is, and the day after he arrives Galinda has taken her under her wing and made her popular, causing people to stop talking shit. So, what if Fiyero just does not find out Elphaba is green until like 2/3rds through the movie? He just straight up misses it, does not know she is an outcast, and just thinks she isn't into him for some bizarre reason. And only when he finds out she has green skin does he realise that he said the foliage thing, which she would definitely have taken as a jab, and actually he was incredibly rude to her. ... Oh no.
LOOK. Obviously I love that Fiyero just is not Fantasy Racist™ and doesn't think there's anything wrong with Elphaba being green. HOWEVER, wouldn't it be funny if-
#i know she says 'yes I've always been green' but he's busy looking into her dreamy eyes shut up#he also says 'yeah or maybe it scratched me or something' in the woods later bc he couldn't hear her over his rag- [i am dragged offscreen]#for a heartbreaking twist he finds out during The Intermission Years after being like 'wait who was she talking about? who has green skin?'#'ELPHABA? she turned Elphaba's skin green??'#'what do you mean she's always b-'#'OH NO'#and then is hunting for her largely to fucking apologize#wicked#wicked 2024#wicked movie#wicked the movie#elphaba thropp#fiyero tigelaar#fiyero x elphaba#fiyeraba#to be clear i am a gliyeraba truther#i ship all three of these idiots in several configurations because it's fiction and im allowed to have fun with it but wow#these dorks could solve all their interpersonal problems by just fucking finding out about polyamory
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girlfriends who date.
LINGLING SIRILAK as FAHLADA THANANUSAK and ORM KORNNAPHAT as EARN SANITHADA episode 6 of THE SECRET OF US
#the secret of us#the secret of us the series#the secret of us series#th: the secret of us#tsou#lingorm#lingling kwong#orm kornnaphat#thai gl#gl drama#girlslovenet#wlw#bibi gifs#bc this is my post i feel like i can complain#i didn't like this episode at all#the girls were so cute and sweet#but earn folded so quick#and lada didn't even apologize#it's really like sandray post mew's birthday party but ray was a 22 years old alcoholic and mentally ill#(in lada's defense tho she's also kind of an alcoholic mentally ill gal so maybe i shouldn't be this harsh)#STAND UP FOR YOURSELF EARN#(she did when she confronted lada's evil mom but yk what i mean)#the pacing was so weird idk#there are only two more episodes for gods sake help me
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have i told y’all that one of the things that kicked off my gain was the fact my sister called me a “fatass” in an argument after i’d lost like 40lbs. at that point i just thought FUCK IT and here i am, 80lbs later 🥰 soon to be 100??
#talk#yupppp#she apologized later which i appreciated#but i was like. damn if people can weaponize this against me even at the smallest i’ve ever been#why even bother. i WILL be a fatass
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You're a kid now…🧍♂️still a kid now!
#if it's not clear this is me doodling human versions of the promo kids lmao#my art#scribbles#v#splatoon#if anyone is interested in thoughts:#3 promos have mostly natural hair but dye or bleach ends for subtle style. hiroooo also has beads in place of suction cups and at the ends#veronika has a bandage over their face btw and the purple tips are from hiroooo's dye#I was thinking about school kids primarily with 1 promo kid#so mainly natural hair color with a few rebellious streaks of color#orange inkling girl also has 2 pigtails from the back that she either has over her shoulders or brings to the front yor spyxfamily style#also choppy sidebangs I imagine she cut herself#she also has moles and blue boy as freckles#2 characters were definitely the hardest because I draw them the least objectively#I think since they're supposed to be the 'trendy flashy stylish' types they can have near full dye jobs that have fried their hair#their eyemask substitutes are just just bits of graphic makeup in my vision lmao#apologies for the rambles I've just been sitting on human designs for a bit and it literally just clicked tonight
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mmmmmm read a disciple shen yuan/shizun luo binghe fanfic about two days ago where the first chapter was the Immortal Conference arc, and SQQ was the one who had to be pushed into the abyss (he was still the villain) except Luo Binghe was refusing and was like, lowkey losing his mind about SQQ being so close to the edge. SQQ ended up having to be the one to fall in himself because of the system's punishment system. The rest of the fic is leading up to that moment. But like, MMM i've been obsessively thinking about that first chapter for DAYS ever since.
now i've been in svsss for a grand total of *checks watch* a week. but god obsessed with that. I want to write/read a fic where disciple SQQ goes a little nuts down there. Like keep all of the things that make SQQ, SQQ, but just. Throw in a little bit more trauma in there. A little bit of a mental break. Let him go a little nuts as a treat. Just a tad unhinged. I wanna see him go, just a little, "god fuck it, i've tried so hard to change this shitty story's outcome and it feels like everything i've done has been for nothing. I'm going to die in this world no matter what I do, I've been doomed from the start, so might as well die the way I want to." and he just, breaks a little! Under all the stress.
He still retains the traits that makes shen yuan, shen yuan, like his overwhelming kindness. But he's just! yk. A little less patient. Paranoid. Jumpy. Colder. A little more aloof and closed off. A little more Shen Jiu. He's no asshole child abuser, but he was a Number One Hater in his past life and he's leaning into that old habit a little more now.
(On a totally coincidental not-at-all related note, there's not enough SJ-and-SY-are-the-same-people fics out there that i've found. This is totally unrelated...)
The Endless Abyss turns the mind into an over-sharpened blade, and SQQ is both fascinated and perhaps a little excited to explore a place that doesn't have a lot of info on it in the mortal realm, but still terrified out of his mind. And he's no Luo Binghe, he doesn't have the sheer brute strength and power to just bulldoze his way through, so he has to be a lot more sneaky and cunning if he wants to survive.
The fic itself role-swapped LBH and SQQ so that SQQ was the half-demon (which lowkey fucks) and LBH the human, but I'm equally-if-not-more obsessed with the idea that LBH remains the half-heavenly demon and SQQ the human. If only because I keep thinking about SQQ befriending some demons (particularly and specifically a group of succubi) and they grow very attached to this Human Cultivator so through magic plot stuff they create some kind of seal/illusion/talisman that makes SQQ appear as a demon because a human cultivator in the endless abyss may as well be the equivalent of putting a giant neon target on your back.
And iirc Shen Jiu was taught demonic cultivation by that one guy(?? i've only been here a week so im not caught up in ALL of the lore yet) so that could totally happen here.
(On the other end of the realms, poor Shizun Luo Binghe is just. losing his fucking mind over losing his most precious and beloved disciple. About .5 seconds from burning down the peaks himself. somebody sedate him.)
The Endless Abyss sucks and SQQ is having a really terrible time and can feel himself going lowkey mad, but also holy shit look at all this WORLD-BUILDING. look at all this flora and fauna, and oh if he had the equipment for it he'd be writing all of this down. ALL OF IT. He was kinda-sorta-already planning on never leaving the Abyss as some sort of fucked up self-exile and self-preservation thing, but now he might? actually just?? never leave if he can help it, like he lowkey likes it down here.
anyways the next time anyone ever sees SQQ again he's got hair so long its almost touching the ground and he's either in rags and half-feral or he's been completely dolled up by his adoptive succubi sisters and still about three seconds from biting anyone who tries to touch him. (he's also lowkey trying to book it back down to the abyss even if he has desperately missed all of his friends and shizun)
#mxtx svsss#svsss au#scum villian self saving system#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#luo binghe#disciple shen yuan#scum villain#svsss#*points at SQQ/SY* i want him to go nuts. as a treat. let him crumble just a little over the stress of his fate and the stress of survival#and the stress of having a lack of autonomy over a handful of his decisions. starry craves angst and she craves a very specific SQQ angst#he was a number 1 hater back in the day and lbr being a hater takes energyyyy. ive heard that this man was the BIGGEST hater i wanna#see him rip a man to shreds with nothing but his tongue and a voice that could cut marble clean in half. skin a man alive sqq you deserve i#*mortal kombat voice* FINISH HIM#i love without-a-cure but unfortunately i dont think SQQ would be able to have WAC and also survive in the abyss.#the succubi nest that adopted him tried seducing him at first. it didn't work. but he did somehow charm them with his cringefail ways#so now they have a brand new mortal big/little brother to dote on. SQQ is frankly delighted to learn all about succubi culture that doesnt#revolve around sex. he makes quite a few friends/allies in the abyss because of his pure fascination and unbiased desire to learn about#demonic culture and all the different niches and nuances of it across species. he's still going insane tho. like that's not stopping.#there's a single LBH pov chapter in the fic and its frankly so unhinged it was fantastic. he's so possessive. he straight up goes:#'oh SQQ isnt gonna be the next peak lord. he's ascending to heaven with me when i do :)' when Sha Hualing (also peak lord) told him that he#couldn't keep his disciple in the bamboo house all the time. what was SQQ gonna do when LBH ascends and he becomes the new peak lord?#gosh that first chapter is rotating around in my mind so bad. LBH was SO unwell. like losing his actual shit over SQQ near the edge.#i so want to write a oneshot abt this where SQQ is also in hysterics (albeit over slightly diff reasons) and tells LBH on his knees:#'this disciple deeply apologizes to his shizun. for he will not be ascending to the heavens with him.' right before he falls into the abyss#this au being disciple SY is for shits and giggles but i can also see it happening for regular SQQ bc 'fuck it im a dead man either way'#frothing at the mouth at this idea also being a SY-is-SJ au too. for the extra angst of SQQ trying to bear the weight of multiple lives on#his shoulders and trying to figure out what is real and what isn't and if he's meant to suffer in all of his lives no matter what he does.#not once in his life has he ever been free to do what he likes has he? self-hatred to the max. he's going mad. poor boy :]
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