#she almost DIED with my sister. and there were problems for the rest of us too. what if something goes wrong?

[the-gayest-sky-kid]

would it like. kill my mother to have safe sex or smth. like is she allergic to condoms and birth control

[maximoffcarter]

You're stuck with me.

Pairings: Casey Novak x reader.

Summary: Casey Novak and reader joined the squad almost at the same time, but as soon as they met, there was a spark that they couldn't deny. They were so in love that nothing really mattered to them, but maybe reader's last name could be a problem?"

A/n: This was requested by an anon, they gave me the choice to either use it with Alex or reader so...I decided to make reader a Cabot haha. I hope you guys enjoy this and please don't be afraid to send me any requests or ideas that you have, the more I have, the more I'm willing to post. I've missed so much writing that I'm having the time of my life. Enjoy and leave your comments, reblogs, hearts, whatever you'd like, will be very much appreciated🫶🏻

*not my gif*

When y/n joined the SVU squad, the last thing she wanted was to be known as Alex Cabot’s little sister. Everywhere she went, even the most unexpected places in New York, they knew about the Cabot legacy, and it was for sure that precinct sixteen knew very well who Alex Cabot was, but y/n was working her way through to be a detective in Boston, wanting to stay away from Manhattan as much as she could. Her idea had even been to be transferred to Chicago at some point, but for some reason -maybe destiny- she ended up being transferred to SVU. She had almost begged Cragen to not tell people she was a Cabot, she knew how everyone appreciated her and were devastated when she had ‘died’, but the last thing she needed, was to be reminded of her name. Of course, it was inevitable, but she thought that at least she tried. The whole squad treated her like she was part of the family, saying she reminded them so much of Alex. She wasn’t too mad about it, but she wanted to be recognized for her work, for herself, not for Alex or her last name.

The only person that truly recognized her for who she was, just y/n, was Casey Novak. Casey and y/n had almost joined at the same time, both understanding each other in some level since they were the new members of team and they both felt left out even if they were all over y/n. Y/n tried to convince herself that since only Olivia and Elliot knew that Alex was alive, maybe the rest of the team just wanted to make sure that she was safe, and Olivia and Elliot knew that if they didn’t take care of y/n, then Alex would come back from the dead and kill them both.

But Casey, she only saw her as y/n, as the sweet girl that she happened to run into while she was leaving court, the sweet girl that was in charge of asking Casey for warrants if they needed one, the sweet girl that she was starting to fall for. For Casey, she was only y/n, and she wouldn’t have it any other way. Y/n had become so close with Casey that she couldn’t help her heart, she had started to fall in love with her, and she kinda hated it because it was against her rules, to date someone she worked with, and the very first rule; never date attorneys. But did she mind? Not one bit. Not when it came to Casey.

Casey looked up as y/n leaned over the doorframe with a silly smile. “You’re here to ask for a warrant, aren’t you?” She grinned.

Y/n chuckled. “How do you know?” She raised her brow as she walked to Casey’s desk and sat on it, looking down at Casey. “You know that’s mostly my job.” She grinned.

“Right, because they know we’re close and I wouldn’t come for your ass.” Casey grinned as she looked up at y/n. “Johansson case?”

“Yep.” Y/n sighed. “We believe he might be hiding something in his apartment, but he won’t tell us more. We believe his wife is also involved and she might be hiding something. We have enough reason to go to his apartment.”

Casey sighed softly. “Fine. Donnelly is the judge. I’m sure I can convince her.” She then smirked. “Or I can just tell her that y/n Cabot told me she needed it.”

Y/n furrowed her brows. “Hey, thought you were my friend.” She shook her head. “Do not use my last name.”

Casey stood up and stood in front of y/n. “You know I’m kidding. I’d never do that, even if they asked me to.” She offered a sweet smile.

Y/n smiled softly. “I know.”

Casey looked down at the floor for a moment as she moved closer to y/n, positioning herself between her legs. “So…only friends, huh?” She looked up at y/n, she had that little grin and look in her eyes that made y/n’s knees weak.

Y/n gulped as she looked up at Casey. “Uh…well, we…we never-“

Casey tilted her head. “I thought it was pretty clear.” She whispered softly, her voice becoming raspier.

“What?” Y/n whispered softly as Casey got impossibly closer to her body.

“That I want more than just a friendship.” Casey smirked as her hand went to y/n’s waist and the other on y/n’s neck, her finger tracing y/n lips as she wetted her own. “That you’re mine.” She tilted her head again. “Or do I need to remind you?”

Y/n felt her breath hitched, her body reacting to Casey’s touch instantly, and her hands going to Casey’s waist to pull her closer. “You don’t need to, but I’d like you to still remind me.” She grinned softly.

Casey chuckled darkly, leaning down, and closing the gap between them in a slow but passionate kiss, earning a moan from y/n as Casey gripped the back of her hair. Y/n kissed her back, wrapping her legs around Casey, making her arms wrap around y/n’s neck as she felt herself almost tripping, making them pull away. They laughed softly as Casey rested her forehead against y/n’s.

“I’m sorry.” Y/n whispered softly, looking up at Casey.

“You got a little too excited there.” Casey chuckled as she kissed her forehead softly. “But hey…” She placed her hand on y/n’s cheek and smiled. “I mean it. I do want us…this. To be more.”

“Are you asking me to be your girlfriend, Casey Novak?” Y/n smiled.

Casey grinned as she nodded. “I am, y/n Cabot.”

Y/n chuckled softly. “Then my answer is yes. I’d love to.” She smiled as she leaned in to kiss her lips again. “You know that anyone could walk in and find us like this, right?”

Casey looked behind y/n and chuckled, looking back at y/n. “You got something on your eye, I was just helping you.” She grinned as she kissed her nose.

Y/n rolled her eyes playfully, but before she could say anything else, her phone went off, sighing softly. “That could be Liv.”

“I’ll go get you the warrant.” Casey kissed her lips one more time before she moved. “I’ll call you when I have it.”

Y/n nodded. “Thanks.” She smiled before he hopped off the desk and made her way out of the office. “See you later!”

********************

A whole year passed when y/n had asked Casey to move in with her, the whole squad now knew that the two women were dating, and they would be lying if they said they didn’t see it coming. They became closer than ever, and their love only grew stronger, making every day easier to go by. Y/n had already mentioned Casey to her parents, knowing that even if they didn’t have Alex anymore, they could be happy with the thought that their little girl was happy with someone by her side, a surprise visit happened and that’s when Casey met y/n’s parents. Everything went smoothly, her parents loved Casey and were happy for y/n. But then her mother passed away, and Casey stood by her side every step of the way. Casey knew how hard it was for y/n to not have Alex by her side, so she tried her best to be there whenever y/n needed her. What she didn’t expect after a few months, was the arrival of a case that brought her sister back from the dead.

The moment Alex came back, y/n told her everything that had happened after she joined SVU, and of course, she couldn’t leave out that her girlfriend was the one that was prosecuting the guy that shot her. Y/n sat with Casey and Alex through the whole thing, both supporting her girlfriend and supporting her sister, she knew Casey felt more pressure knowing that y/n cared so much about this case, not only for Antonio but for Alex too. Once the whole trial was over, y/n went to meet Alex, receiving a call that she had to go again for a while and she didn’t know for how long, so they met for a final coffee to say goodbye. Y/n went back to their apartment and closed the door behind her, taking off her coat and putting it on the rack, making her way to the living room and smiled as she found Casey on the couch.

“Hey there.” Casey smiled as she closed the file she had on her lap, putting it aside as she extended her arms for y/n.

Y/n sat on Casey’s lap and wrapped her arms around her middle, burying her face on Casey’s neck as she wrapped her arms around y/n. “Thought I’d find you asleep.”

“I wanted to wait for you.” Casey kissed her forehead softly, her hands going up and down her back.

Y/n sighed softly. “She’s gone, not sure for how long.”

“I’m sorry, baby. But it’s for her safety.”

Y/n nodded. “I know.”

“I got a call from my dad.” Casey whispered softly. “He wants me to visit this weekend for my mom’s birthday.”

“When are you leaving?” Y/n asked softly.

Casey nibbled her lip. “I was…thinking…we could in the afternoon on Friday.”

Y/n moved to look at Casey, fully sitting on her lap. “You...you want me to come with you?”

Casey smiled softly, softly stroking her hips. “I do. I’ve told them about you, and they really want to meet you.”

“Are you sure?”

Casey chuckled. “Baby, I was lucky enough to meet your mom, I already met your parents. I thought maybe it was time you meet mine.”

Y/n smiled softly as she placed her hands on Casey’s neck, leaning down to kiss her lips softly. “I’d love to.” She chuckled. “Alex said she’s happy I found someone. She thought I’d die alone.”

“I’m not gonna let that happen. You’re stuck with me.” Casey placed her hand on y/n’s neck bringing her down again for another kiss.

“Oh, I definitely like the sound of that.” Y/n said against her lips, kissing her again tenderly.

********************

The whole ride to Casey’s house, y/n had been a nervous wreck. She knew Casey wasn’t that close to her family, not after all she had gone through and then coming out to her parents had also been a bit of a problem but finally they came to terms with it, wanting nothing more than seeing her daughter happy. Y/n knew Casey was Catholic, she had grown in the religion, but she had decided to not follow it when she was older enough to choose for herself, which was also the reason she was not as close to her parents as she used to be. Casey reassured her the whole ride that her parents were excited to meet her and see who had her daughter so happy, Casey had told them enough about y/n, just a little heads up on who she was and how they met, which made y/n feel a bit better because at least there wouldn’t be like a million of questions; maybe just like a thousand.

Y/n took a deep breath as Casey parked right in front of the house. It was a casual family house, which she felt some sort of comfort as she looked at it, a faint smile on her face as she thought about a young Casey running around the house and practicing softball outside. She had seen some pictures of Casey when she was a kid, so now seeing the house she grew up in made her feel warm inside. She turned to look at Casey who had been staring at her this whole time, grabbing y/n’s hand, and bringing it to her lips, kissing it softly.

“Everything will be okay. I love you, and that’s all that matters.” Casey smiled softly.

Y/n nodded softly as she offered a small smile. “I love you too.” She sighed. “Sorry I just…this is the first time I actually meet the parents and I just…I want them to like me. I- I don’t know.” She chuckled nervously.

“If your parents accepted me, trust me…mine will.” Casey chuckled softly as she leaned in and kissed her cheek. “If you don’t feel comfortable, we’ll just leave, okay?”

“I don’t want you to lose your mom’s party tomorrow.”

“We’ll figure it out then. But I’m not leaving you.” Casey smiled as she kissed her hand one more time before she exited the car and went to the other side to open the door for y/n.

As they walked to the door, Casey grabbed y/n’s hand and held it tightly, feeling how y/n had started trembling a little as the moment started to feel more real with every step they took. Casey looked at y/n and leaned in to kiss her lips before she knocked on the door, telling her that it would be okay one last time before the door was opened. Y/n didn’t know what she had expected Casey’s parents to be like, but of course they were as tall as Casey, her dad being way taller, both had bright smiles on their faces as they looked at both women. She could see where Casey got that beautiful smile she loved, she looked exactly like her mom, her hair very similar, and she definitely had her dad’s eyes. The father was the first one to wrap his arms around Casey, squeezing her tightly, making y/n smile. And then she took a deep breath as she noticed Casey’s mother opening her arms to hug y/n.

“Oh, y/n! You’re just as beautiful as our girl described!” Her mother wrapped her in a big, tight hug, chuckling softly. “I’m Angela, but you can call me Angie.” She pulled away and smiled brightly, going for her daughter next.

“And I’m Tom. It is so nice to meet you, y/n.” He said with a smile and also wrapped his arms around her. “But please! C’mon in, we have the table ready! We figured you guys would be hungry after that drive, so get in here. I’ll take care of your bags!” He said as he walked out of the house and made his way to Casey’s car.

“Oh, honey, you look so good! Happiness really suits you.” Angie winked at Casey and walked inside the house.

Casey chuckled softly and looked at y/n, leaning over to whisper in her ear. “Forgot to tell you that they’re huggers.”

“Thanks for the heads up.” Y/n chuckled softly as she followed Casey.

The rest of the dinner went smoothly, most of the conversation had been about Casey’s childhood and college days, y/n enjoying every minute of it as she was hoping that they wouldn’t start asking about her. The only thing she had mentioned was why she decided to be a detective and if she enjoyed working with their daughter, and y/n was more than happy to answer those questions. Casey spent the whole dinner trying to hide her blush as she tried to stop their parents from talking more about her, but also enjoying so much the way y/n was just happy and laughing at everything they had to say, even if they were embarrassing stories, she was just happy that after all the nerves, her girlfriend was happy and relaxed. Tom had dragged Casey to the living room to show her something that he had recently purchased while y/n had offered to help Angie with the dishes and to clean the kitchen.

“You really didn’t have to help with the dishes, y/n. You’re a guest here.” Angie said as she looked at y/n.

“It’s the least I can do. Dinner was delicious and I wanted to say thank you.” Y/n smiled as she finished the last dish, and dried her hands before she looked back at Angie.

“Then use your words, honey.” Angie chuckled. “But I appreciate it. You’re very kind, y/n.” She smiled softly. “And I can definitely see why my daughter loves you so much.”

Y/n blushed slightly, trying not to look away. “I love her just as much, if not more.” She smiled.

“I’m excited for you to meet the whole family tomorrow! Let me tell you that the house will be crowded, my favorite.” She chuckled.

“I’m excited to meet them.” Y/n smiled.

“I was telling Tom that it would be nice to meet your parents soon, we could set up a dinner and we could go the 6 of us.”

Y/n cleared her throat as she looked down at her hands. “I uh…I’m sure my dad would be more than happy.” She looked back at Angie as she offered a small smile. “My…mom. She passed away a little while ago.”

“Oh, honey. I am so sorry, I didn’t know.” Angie placed her hand on y/n’s shoulder. “I’m sure she was a lovely woman.”

“The best.” Y/n smiled softly. “She loved Casey, she got to meet her.”

Angie smiled. “I’d have loved to meet her.”

“Angie, let these ladies go up to their room so they get some rest, we have a big day tomorrow and the need their beauty sleep. Even if they’re already beautiful.” Tom chuckled softly.

Y/n looked back at Casey and smiled softly, but Casey knew there was something going on. They said their goodnights and headed upstairs. Casey opened the door to what used to be her room and smiled as she noticed that they had barely changed it, most of her things were still there, medals and trophies, some diplomas, and pictures, all untouched. Y/n smiled as she looked around, fascinated to see more of Casey’s childhood.

“You’re living for this, aren’t you?” Casey playfully said as she closed the door behind her.

Y/n turned to look at y/n and smiled. “Can’t say I’m not.” She chuckled softly. “Your parents are so nice, and your house is beautiful. Your room…definitely fits you, even now.” She teased as she walked to Casey.

Casey chuckled softly, wrapping her arms around her waist, and kissing her lips softly. “You’re cute.”

“Of course I am.” Y/n chuckled as she wrapped her arms around Casey’s neck. “Thank you for bringing me with you.”

“How could I not? At least I won’t suffer on my own tomorrow.” Casey grinned.

Y/n rolled her eyes softly. “Right.”

Casey tilted her head softly. “Are you okay? I saw you a bit off with mom.”

Y/n smiled. “Your mom said she wanted to meet my parents.” She shrugged. “Had to break the news that my mom is gone.”

“Shit. Baby, I’m so sorry. I forgot to tell her and to not mention it.”

“Hey.” Y/n placed her hand on Casey’s cheek and stroked it softly. “It’s okay. I promise.” She smiled softly. “C’mon, we should go to sleep, we need to prepare for tomorrow’s big party.” She chuckled.

Casey nodded as she smiled. “You’re starting to sound like my parents.” She laughed as she pulled y/n to the bed.

********************

After breakfast, both women went back to their room to get ready for the party and not even an hour later, the whole house was crowded with both friends and family members. Casey and y/n took a moment for themselves and then went downstairs, ready to be bombarded with questions and hugs. Just like Angie had said, the whole house was crowded, they were all over Casey since they hadn’t seen her in so long, and Casey never let go of y/n’s hand unless she was saying hi to someone or someone hugged her -the also hugged y/n-. The party was going great, they had all gone to the back of the house into the beautiful patio, there was music, snacks, they were preparing a barbeque, things seemed to go perfectly fine. Casey made sure to always have y/n by her side, knowing that her girlfriend had anxiety and sometimes she got a bit overwhelmed by big crowds. Just as they thought they were finally free to get away from the family, another family member appeared right in front of them.

“Casey, it’s been so long.” She smiled.

Casey nodded. “Aunt Claire, nice to see you. “She offered a small smile. “This is my girlfriend, y/n.”

Y/n smiled and extended her hand. “Nice to meet you.”

Claire furrowed her brows and tilted her head. “You…look familiar. Have we met before?”

Y/n furrowed her brows as she smiled. “Um…I don’t think so.”

“Do you work with Casey?”

Casey looked at her with a serious look on her face. “Yes, she does work with me.”

“Ah, another attorney, huh? She follows in your steps too, Casey? Not wanting to do anything for your uncle?”

“Claire, are you seriously going to do this today? On my birthday?” Angie raised her brow as she walked to them, crossing her arms.

“Oh, c’mon, Ang. I asked your daughter a favor and she couldn’t help me. She doesn’t help her so called family.”

“Claire, please stop.” Angie snapped as she looked at her. “Please, let’s not do this here. And no, y/n is a detective, she works with Casey. Do not scare her away with your things, Claire. You’re my sister and I love you, but please-“

“Wait.” Claire looked back at y/n. “I know where I’ve seen you. You’re not an attorney, but your sister was.” She laughed darkly. “Your whole family. One of your uncles. You’re a Cabot.”

Y/n’s heart stopped as she looked at Casey, a little confused as to what was happening. “I…yes. But-“

“Casey?” Angie asked as she looked between Casey and y/n. “She’s a Cabot?”

Casey sighed as she nodded. “She is.”

Y/n looked at Casey furrowing her brows. “What does that have to do with me? Is there a problem that I’m a Cabot?”

“Your uncle…that stupid attorney. He put my husband in jail, and he had no mercy on him, now he’s locked up for good and he won’t ever get out! He made sure of that.” Claire snapped and then look at Casey. “And you. You should be ashamed. Not only for dating a girl, but for letting a Cabot come to this house. How dare you, Casey? You didn’t want to help your uncle, and now you bring her here?!”

“Stop! It wasn’t her who did it. And if he’s in jail, is for a good reason.” Casey snapped back as she looked at Claire, her hand grabbing y/n’s tightly.

“Casey Grace Novak! You do not speak to your aunt like that!” Angie looked at Casey and stood between Claire and Casey. “You know damn well that we support your aunt, and we always said the Cabot’s were not good people.”

“Mom.” Casey whispered softly.

Angie looked behind Casey with a serious look. “I’m sorry, y/n. But you’re not welcomed here.”

“Mom!” Casey shook her head. “I cannot believe you’re saying that.”

“You knew that we do not like the Cabot’s. You knew she was a Cabot and still chose to bring her here. You should know better, Casey. You should’ve never fallen in love with this girl.”

“That’s enough! I will not let you speak to my girlfriend like that. You know damn well why he’s in jail and you still protect him. And you know what? Yes, she’s a Cabot, and I love her, and I’m not gonna let any of you speak like that in front of her. I made a mistake in coming back.” Casey looked back at y/n and whispered in her ear. “Let’s go, baby.”

Casey pulled her inside the house and took her upstairs to grab their things. Y/n only stood there frozen as Casey put everything in their bags without saying a word, once she checked that she had everything, she grabbed both bags and told y/n to follow her. Casey could still hear Claire yelling horrible things about y/n and her family, she didn’t even care about closing the door as they rushed to Casey’s car. 15 minutes into the road, Casey finally snapped out of her trance and looked at y/n, noticing that she was just as quiet as she was, but she could see some tears in her eyes. Casey sighed softly and decided to stop the car in a gas station, killing the engine and turning to look at y/n.

“Baby?” Casey whispered softly.

“Why didn’t you tell me about that?” Y/n whispered softly.

Casey sighed. “I didn’t think it was important. Claire, she- she hadn’t been to any family event in so long, I didn’t know my mom still talked to her. I really thought they had left that behind and-“

“But you knew…that your family didn’t approve of mine.” Y/n looked at Casey, tears rolling down her cheeks. “You never told them I was a Cabot.”

Casey looked down at her hands and shook her head. “No.”

Y/n nodded as she looked away. “Can we just go? I wanna go home.” Her voice broke as she said the last word, turning from Casey and crossing her arms. Casey stared at her for a moment but nodded softly.

The ride back they were in complete silence. Casey knew what she had done was wrong, but she had never agreed with her family, she had denied to help because she knew what her ‘uncle’ had done and she had decided to back away from it, and yes, she knew how her family had blamed the Cabot’s, but she never thought she’d be involved with them. Not only had she taken Alex’s job, but now she was dating a Cabot. She was sure that if they knew that she had helped Alex, they would have lost it. As for y/n, the interaction they had had the night before was still stuck in her mind which broke her heart entirely as she figured that it all had been a lie because they didn’t really know who she was, and now that they knew, they didn’t like her, Casey’s mother has clearly said that she was not welcomed. And once again, she hated the fact that she was a Cabot. She loved her family, she loved her parents, but she hated that things like this still happened till this day.

Once they were back in their apartment, y/n helped Casey with their bags and rapidly went into their apartment and into their room, both women still in complete silence. Y/n changed into comfortable clothes and then laid in their bed, crying as she felt overwhelmed by what had happened. She heard Casey walking into the room and figured she too wanted to change, so she didn’t say anything, it was their room after all. Y/n didn’t know when she had fallen asleep, but as she opened her eyes, she figured the sun had hidden and night had taken over, making her look at her clock in the nightstand and saw it was pass seven. She sighed softly and stretched before she got up and walked out of the room. She headed to the kitchen and to her surprise, Casey was sitting at the kitchen island with some files in front of her and writing something in her notepad. She looked up as y/n stood in the entrance of the kitchen, both women look into each other’s eyes. Casey put her pen down and cleared her throat, ready to talk but y/n interrupted her.

“I’m sorry.” Y/n said rapidly, nibbling on her lip. “I…I shouldn’t…we should’ve talked, and I…I completely just…shut you down.”

Casey shook her head. “Y/n…I should’ve told you. I should’ve known. I just thought if they met you…they’d change their mind, and they wouldn’t say anything.” She sighed. “You’re everything to me. I do not regret meeting you, I do not regret falling in love with you, I do not regret being with you.”

Y/n looked at Casey as tears rolled down her cheeks. “You mean that?”

Casey tilted her head as her heart sank. “My love…come here.” She moved and extended her arms, y/n walked to her and wrapped her arms around her neck, Casey wrapping her arms tightly around her waist. “I love you. And I don’t care what they think or say. I want you, and no one is ever going to change that, you hear me?”

Y/n nodded softly as she buried her face in Casey’s neck. “I love you too. I don’t wanna lose you, Case.”

“I don’t wanna lose you either.” Casey kissed the side of her head and sighed softly. “Please, just…let’s not make this separate us.”

Y/n pulled away and placed her hands on Casey’s cheeks. “Nothing could ever make me stop loving you, Casey.”

Casey smiled softly as she leaned in and kissed y/n’s lips softly.

********************

“No, mom. I need you to please stop calling me.” Casey groaned as she ran her fingers through her hair, clearly stressed. “If you’re going to keep talking about y/n like that, yes. I will literally block you, I do not care!” Casey slammed the phone and sighed heavily.

“Bad moment?” Elliot asked as he looked at Casey.

Casey looked up and shook her head. “No, sorry. I’m- done. What do you need?” Casey sat back down in her chair and looked at Elliot.

Elliot nodded. “Wanna talk about it?”

Casey raised her brow as she huffed a chuckle. “You’re gonna play shrink?”

Elliot huffed a laugh and shrugged. “Can’t say I’m the best at it, but I know I have run to some after a bad day or moment.” He said as he walked to Casey, sitting down on a chair.

Casey sighed and shook her head. “Just family stuff.”

“Something wrong with y/n? I heard you mention her.”

“Let’s just say my family has history with the Cabot’s, and…when they found out she was a Cabot…they almost killed me.” Casey nibbled on her lower lip as she looked down at her hands.

Elliot nodded. “I get it.” He cleared his throat and shrugged. “And? What are you gonna do?”

“Put a restraining order on my family.” Casey scoffed. “They keep calling me, and I have no doubt my mom will make an appearance sooner or later.”

“You love y/n. That’s all that matters. Family? It’s not always the ones you share blood with.”

Casey nodded. “I know. I just…thought that maybe we could finally reconnect, and I was sure they’d love y/n. But…” she shrugged. “Didn’t happen.”

“You know you have us. And you have y/n, who wouldn’t leave your side. Whatever your family thinks, screw them. Even if y/n is a Cabot, which doesn’t define her.”

Casey smiled softly as she looked at Elliot. “You’re spending too much time with Huang.”

Elliot laughed. “Did it help?”

“A bit.” Casey smiled. “Thanks.”

Elliot nodded. “Good.” He stood up. “We need you down at the precinct.”

“You could’ve called.” Casey furrowed her brows.

Elliot shrugged. “You were on my way. I decided to stop by.”

Casey grinned as she shook her head, taking a deep breath and standing up. “Let’s go then.”

********************

Y/n paced around the waiting room, tears rolling down her cheeks as she tried to breath. She kept hearing Olivia telling her to sit down but she knew if she sat down, she was going to break down and she couldn’t do that. Not when her girlfriend was literally in surgery. Y/n had decided to go home to take a break from the case, and Olivia had offered to stay in the office to work with Casey and go over the case, what she had not expected was for Casey to get attacked, and now here they were, in the hospital. Y/n overthought every possible scenario that could’ve prevented this, but even if she did, there was nothing else she could do. Things had been pretty tense since that day back with Casey’s family, and this was the last straw they needed. Y/n felt a pair of hands on her shoulders and was about to tell Olivia that she didn’t need to sit down but as she turned, she found Alex standing right in front of her.

“Lex.” Y/n breathed out as she wrapped her arms around Alex. “You’re here.” She whispered softly as she sobbed.

“I’m here.” Alex whispered softly as she kissed her forehead.

“I should’ve stayed with Casey.” Y/n cried out, closing her eyes as more tears rolled down her cheeks.

“There was nothing you could do, y/n. Don’t torment yourself.” Alex pulled away enough to look down at y/n. “Elliot is taking care of it, okay?”

Y/n nodded softly, wrapping her arms around Alex. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

“You needed me.” Alex whispered softly as she kissed her forehead again.

Alex had finally made y/n sit down beside her, her arm wrapped around her as y/n leaned into her, tears still rolling down her cheeks but at least she was a little more calm than earlier. They sat there in silence for a moment, just waiting to hear back from Casey. Y/n’s mind was filled with the ‘what ifs’, she hated that she hadn’t been there to help Casey, to avoid this from happening. Olivia had found her unconscious, and she hadn’t woken up at all, so what were the odds of her actually waking up now? Alex kept trying to get her to talk about something, anything at all, but y/n just answered shortly, not feeling like talking, but knowing perfectly what Alex was doing.

“Casey’s family hates me.” Y/n whispered softly.

“You meet parents for the first time, and this is how it goes?” Alex asks playfully.

“I think Uncle John convicted Casey’s uncle. They hate the Cabot’s.”

Alex sighed as she looked down at y/n. “Casey never told you?”

Y/n shook her head. “She never supported her family with this, so stayed away from it, so the effect didn’t get to her. And that’s why she didn’t mind dating me.”

“And I’m sure she doesn’t regret it.” Alex smiled softly.

Y/n looked up at Alex and smiled softly. “She doesn’t.”

“Then I don’t think Casey really cares what her family has to say. You’re an amazing person, y/n. And if Casey loves you, then that’s all that matters.” Alex smiled as she ran her hand through y/n’s hair. “Us Cabot’s…well…there won’t be a time where we are not recognized for something. And you’re now leaving your mark too.” She kissed her forehead softly. “I’m sorry you’re a Cabot.” She chuckled.

Y/n sighed softly as she rested her head against Alex’s shoulder again. “I’m not. I just…wish we were more than a Cabot.”

“We are. You are.” Alex smiled softly. “So…I take it that when you and Casey get married, you’ll take Casey’s last name?” She grinned.

Y/n rolled her eyes playfully as she looked back at Alex. “You’re getting ahead of yourself.”

“Oh, c’mon. You’re telling me you haven’t thought about it?” Alex raised her brow.

“I mean…” y/n shrugged as she blushed slightly. “I guess.”

“Y/n Novak…sounds good to me. I’m sure Casey also loves the idea.” Alex smiled.

“You’re a pain in the ass.” Y/n chuckled.

“You missed me.” Alex chuckled as she pulled her back into her arms.

After an hour or so, Alex had convinced y/n to have some lunch with her at least in the cafeteria of the hospital, and Olivia promised she wouldn’t move at all until they were back. And a bit after, Olivia had been notified that Casey was out of surgery and in her room, Olivia had called Alex to let her know and she stayed with Casey until y/n came back. Y/n mentally prepared herself before she walked into the room, afraid of what she could see. Olivia had been the only one to see the state of Casey before she went into surgery, and just the thought of seeing Casey hurt, broke y/n’s heart. Some tears left y/n’s eyes as she walked into the room, a soft small smile on Casey’s face as she saw her girlfriend, extending her hand for her to get closer. After making sure that everything was okay, Olivia left with Alex to meet Elliot, and y/n stayed with Casey.

Y/n put the tray of food away and went back to sit with Casey on the bed, holding her hand and kissing it softly. “Do you want to get some more sleep?”

Casey shook her head. “No. I just…I mean maybe I should.” She sighed.

Y/n tilted her head. “Your memory will come back, Case. You need to stop pushing yourself.”

“I know but…I couldn’t even defend myself.” Casey’s voice broke as she looked at y/n.

“Baby…you did what you had to do. You’re here. That’s all that matters. They’ll get whoever did this.”

Casey nodded softly. “Are they gonna let you stay?”

“Even if they didn’t, I’m staying.” Y/n chuckled softly. “Hey uh…I left a text to your mom.” She looked down at their hands.

“What?” Casey furrowed her brows. “Y/n-“

“They’re your family, Case. Even if they don’t accept me, they should know about their daughter.” Y/n looked back at Casey, offering a small smile. “I’m not going anywhere, no matter what.”

Casey nodded softly. “Thank you.” She smiled softly.

Y/n smiled as she leaned in and kissed Casey’s head softly. “I love you, and you’re stuck with me, forever.” She chuckled.

“Forever sounds good.” Casey grinned.

********************

“Y/n, c’mon. I can walk, I literally went to the office yesterday and to court.” Casey groaned as y/n helped her sit down on the couch.

“Which you shouldn’t have. You know the heart attack you gave me when Elliot told me he saw you in court?” Y/n shook her head. “You should’ve called me, Case.”

“I knew you’d bring me back.” Casey looked at y/n with puppy eyes.

Y/n rolled her eyes as she sat beside Casey. “You’re impossible.” She leaned in and kissed her lips. “At least now I have 5 days free to be a pain in your ass and take care of you.” She grinned. “And you’re not escaping from this.”

“At least it’s us for 5 days.” Casey grinned. “I’m sorry.”

“No worries, just don’t be stubborn.” Y/n smiled as she pecked her lips. Just in time, there was a knock on their door. “That’s probably Alex. She said she’d come before she had to leave.” Y/n stood up and walked out of the living room. As she opened the door, her heart stopped for a moment, staring at the person in front of her.

“It’s not Alex?” Casey yelled from the living room.

“No.” Y/n cleared her throat. “Mrs. Novak.”

“Y/n.” Angie sighed. “I’m sorry I came like this, I…I was hoping I could see my daughter.”

Y/n nodded softly as she stepped aside. She closed the door behind her and started walking to the living room followed by Angie. “It’s your mom, Case.” She whispered softly as she looked at Casey.

“Mom?” Casey furrowed her brows. “What- why are you here?”

Angie sighed as she looked at Casey. “Oh, honey. I wanted to make sure you were okay.” She went to sit down beside Casey.

“I’m alright.” Casey nodded. “Y/n has been taking care of me.”

Y/n sighed softly. “I should leave you two to talk. I’ll be in the room if you need something.” She smiled softly. But before she could leave, Angie stood up and grabbed her hand and stopped her.

“Wait, y/n. I- I also wanted to talk to you. To both of you.” Angie looked back at Casey and then at y/n. “I’m not only here to see  Casey. I’m here to apologize.” Y/n furrowed her brows as she looked at Casey and then back at Angie. “I know…that you should not forgive me, what I said was wrong. But…your father and I talked, we’ve never seen you so happy, Casey.” Angie looked back at Casey and smiled. “The way you spoke about y/n, the way you protected her. The looks you give each other. I shouldn’t have said anything. Claire was so wrong to do that, and we shouldn't have believed her.”

Casey smiled softly. “You mean it?”

Angie smiled as she looked at Casey and nodded. “Yes.” She looked back at y/n and smiled, holding her other hand. “I am so sorry, y/n. It wasn’t your fault what happened in the past, and I know that you love my daughter, and my daughter loves you. I am willing to get to know you better.” She took a deep breath. “To accept you as my daughter too.”

Y/n’s face softened at her words, some tears forming in her eyes. “I’d like that.” She smiled.

“Even if we treated you badly…you were still willing to update me on Casey. And you let me come in here to see her.”

Casey furrowed her brows. “You…gave her our address?”

Y/n looked back at Casey as she shrugged. “I told you, you’re still their daughter. I just didn’t expect her to come.” She chuckled softly.

Angie chuckled. “I’m sorry I didn’t say anything.”

“You’re always welcome here. Mr. Novak too. Right, Case?” Y/n smiled.

Casey looked at them and nodded softly, smiling. “Of course.”

Angie smiled as she wrapped her arms around y/n. “Thank you for giving me another chance.”

“Of course.” Y/n smiled as they pulled away.

“Well, I don’t wanna make a doctor visit, so I thought I could make some lunch for you, if you let me.” Angie looked at Casey, walking to her and kissing her forehead.

Casey nodded. “I’m okay if y/n is okay with it.” She smiled.

“More than okay.” Y/n smiled softly.

Y/n showed Angie the kitchen and where everything was, offering her help but Angie told her to go back with Casey and she’d let them know when everything was done, looking into the fridge to see what she could do with the stuff inside. Y/n went back to the living room and smiled softly as she sat with Casey, wrapping her arm around her carefully and kissing the side of her head.

“I gotta admit that I thought she would come to kill me after I sent the address.” Y/n chuckled softly.

Casey smiled. “Thank you. You didn’t have to do this.”

Y/n grinned. “I had to give it another try. I thought that if it worked this time, then I had a better chance in a future.”

“What for?” Casey furrowed her brows as she grinned.

“To marry you.” Y/n smiled.

Casey’s face softened as she smiled, leaning in to kiss her lips. “I like the sound of that, a lot.” She said against her lips, chuckling softly as she kissed her again. “Y/n Novak…maybe?” She grinned. “Sounds perfect.”

Y/n rolled her eyes playfully. “Alex said you’d love the sound of that.”

Casey smiled. “Of course I do. But most importantly, the thought of you being my wife.” She pecked her lips softly.

“I love it.” Y/n chuckled softly as she pulled Casey for another kiss.

[aonungyoufuck]

Runaway

Part: Two

Pairing: Ao’nung X Sully Fem!reader

Synopsis : You had Saved Neteyam’s life. Norm and Max Extracting the Bullet but Healing the way Ronal sought to. Being kept at her side to make sure as she put it ‘your recklessness doesn’t kill you’. This leaves you to bond not only with Tsireya a bit more. But Ao’nung as well. Much to Ronal’s dismay

“Breathe how you were taught. It will help ease the pain.” Ronal’s stern voice spoke as she bandaged you up. 

As much as she wanted to hate you and your family for putting not only her people But her children in the dead center of your family’s war. She couldn’t be more thankful that no lives were lost. Not yet if she had a say in it at least. 

“Now lay down Gently. You will stay here till i see you are better”

You nodded. Gulping down a groan as you could barely breathe without any pain. 

“Your Family is allowed to see you. But do not move” Ronal ordered as she stepped outside the Marui that was not far from her own. As your luck would have it. You were the only one severely injured. Which left you lonely but also relieved no one got to see you making faces. 

“My child” Neytiri spoke as she approached you. Gently caressing your face in a form of comfort. 

“Y/n How do you feel?” your father asked you. You barely could move but made an effort to turn to look at him.

“Like death itself”

Small laughter erupted and all you could do was smile. 

“Neteyam, How do you find yourself” you asked. 

“Well sister. Thank you for saving me”

You smiled nodding a bit as you looked up ahead. Your rather not suffer Ronal’s wrath if you move too much. 

“I am to stay here. Sorry i cant be with you all”

“It is alright my child. When our duties do not interfere we will come to talk with you” your mother spoke as you enjoyed her gently grazes on your forehead.

As the oldest daughter you suppose you could enjoy taking some time away from your siblings tho at the expense of some pain “Lo’ak, Kiri, Tuk! Please do not cause more Trouble to Neteyam while i am out of commission”

You didnt need to look to know the offended gasp Lo’ak was sure to wear. “I do not cause trouble”

“Oh Eywa take me now for that is the fattest lie anyone’s ever told” You commented back sarcastically. Making Neteyam laugh and Tuk giggle. 

“But please. Keep yourself safe for i am not there to beat some sense into you guys” you said a yawn escaping your lips as you grew tired after today’s events. 

“Dont Worry. I’ll be there to keep an eye on them” Spider commented. You had almost forgotten that he had joined in again. 

“Great mother have mercy on this clan” Its not that you didn’t trust Spider to keep an eye on them. The only problem was Spider wasn’t one to back down if it looked ‘fun’

“It looks like your tired. Come on now kids lets head out and let your sister rest. Its been a long day already” Jake said as he hurdled the kids out. Your mother stayed, kissing your head as she headed out as well. 

You stayed there. Listening to the waves crash below you and all around you as you sighed. No matter how tired you were. You couldn’t find sleep. Maybe it was the pain? The quietness that was the lack of your family? Perhaps all that happened today. You did not know why. 

“I see you are awake. Much better as mother brings me food to give you” 

Turning but regretting it immediately you saw who it was. Ao’nung. Not that you have gotten terribly close. But now his face didn't initiate some sort of anger like it use to. “Oh. I would have thought only Ronal and Tsireya would come by.”

“Are you unhappy it is me?”

“Not particularly but you know what i mean”

“I know its just fun that you dont have enough bite as before”

You couldn’t really watch but you heard him set stuff aside as he sat beside you and began to feed you. Perhaps if you had witnessed this before or known before you would have rather died. But now you appreciated the gesture. 

“Tsireya will come by later to reapply some of the paste and change your wraps”

You nodded as you finished your meal. 

“You know. Now that im here i cant really deny but i am glad you are well and alive”

“Really now?”

“Is that hard to believe?”

“Not really” you spoke turning to look at him. This time the pain came from the stiffness in your neck from laying down for so long. “We may not be the best of friends but im Glad all of you are safe too you know?”

“You are strange as you are reckless you know?”

“Would you rather i have died?”

“What? No!”

You smiled.  Extending you hand to him for him to take. And reluctantly he did. All you did was gently rub his hand with your thumb. This sight would have made him hiss in anger before. His normal hand against your ‘freak’ one. But it was comforting knowing you were warm and alive and not dead. Like how you felt before. 

“If it were any of you I would also do this, you know? Not Just my family”

“But why?”

“Well i cant speak for you or for anyone really. But when you tend to know the value of a life that is not yours. You do some crazy stuff”

“Do you not value your life?”

“I do. I am thankful i'm alive right now. But I value all your lives a lot too. You are the Future of this Clan along side your sister if not you. I am without a home, remember?”

“Wow you really are strange”

“Are you saying if it was Tsireya you wouldn’t take the fall for her?”

He was quiet. For he didnt need to answer because you already knew. 

“Being the oldest makes you think the least bit about yourself eh?”

“Shut up you Skxawng”

You smiled. Yawning as you finally felt sleep welcoming you. “If i pass in my sleep. Please do not make fun at anyone else who seeks Uturu. Tho i know you made plenty progress already”

You didn't get to see his face fall. The thought of you passing was hard enough on your family he couldn’t really place why. But he feels like he’d mourn a lot as well. 

Watching you sleep he stayed there. Watching your Chest rise and fall. Perhaps he grew paranoid? Perhaps it was the drilling that he was to ‘protect all he can in the clan’ that his father made sure he knew. But he stayed there. Still holding your hand as he listened to you sleep. 

Had Tsireya not come by at night to change your paste and wounds. You wouldn’t have believed that Ao’nung sat there asleep holding your hand. 

And you may have calmed your quickened heart. 

“It seems the Wounds will take much longer to heal. But its made progress during the night”

You nodded as you listened to Ronal speak as she inspected you. “Understandable. Na’vi bodies or humans are built to take a bullet to the chest” you reasoned as you lifted your arm for her to wrap better. “However, I am feeling much better. Thank you”

“You still cannot move too much alright? I'm Afraid a nerve May have been scrapped as your arm is pretty stiff” 

You could only nod. Taking in a breather as you lowered your arm. “I thank you Tsahik. Tho i ask you how is My family”

“Out doing their Assigned jobs. Even that. Human is helping with a hunt right now”

You smiled nodding to yourself in reassurance. Flicking your fingers as you watched her go. Perhaps one day you can talk more comfortably. But you knew how stressful it was. She was to prepare for a child soon. And here you were taking up time. 

So in the silence of the home you stood and thought. Perhaps you could learn a thing or two, if she allowed it. All to help her of course make a fast delivery. Perhaps you were also just making some excuse to stay a little longer. You didn’t know. 

Time moved painfully slow and all you could really do was rebraid your hair. You silently cursing for the thick amount of hair that had managed to grow in such a small state.

You turned a little to look at the small sheer veil of a ‘door’ being moved. Tsireya greeting you and you greeting her back. 

“I see you can move more than yesterday” she says with a smile. Placing down a bowl of fruit” 

“Ah yes. Still sore. Kinda hard to rebraid my hair with just one hand”

“Would you like me to help you?”

“If you do not mind”

And without much word. Tsireya nodded, stepping behind you. And began to work with what your last hair style was. 

“Actually just braid the ends together please? I feel like i cant stand the pressure of them all in braids”

“Thats perfectly reasonable” 

You smiled feeling the hair loosen and give your head a rest. 

“You know it was kinda of sweet that My brother stayed by your side”

You could only roll your eyes. “ i still cant believe it” 

“But you better believe it. If i hadnt have to wake you You wouldn’t have believed my word” 

“Oh Eywa, I know. But its odd as to why he would stay. I mean we aren’t particularly great friends. Or really friends to begin with. I spend most my time here with you or Roxto at the very least”

“I do know. I was there for most of it” Tsireya spoke, finishing up the ends gently rubbing your hair with an oil that would help protect against the sea. “But Brother isnt at all against you guys now. Im sure now of all you guys can become friends”

‘Perhaps even more’ you silently hoped as you could only lay back down. “Perhaps in this time we can. And perhaps not.”

Tsireya smiled. Scooting the bowl closer to you. “Well I’ll leave this here for when you are hungry. Ao’nung will come by later with some more food”

You bid her goodbye. Listening to the waves. The calming of Eywa all around you. It made you thankful. Thankful to be alive at this very moment.

[ficsinhistory]

I think the problem with S3 of The Bear was that ok the mess, the coldness and the distancing and the plots in general...if it seemed like it was intentional. If they had a long term plan and this was a bait to change course later like good stories do. But it wasn't, it was just poorly written (and a bit racist).

For example, we could see Sydcarmy being separated because of Carm's worsening mental health and him wanting to convince himself that Claire is better because he doesn't want to make mistakes with the kitchen family and Syd anymore, more as a legitimate plot point and less as Storer wanting to sink Sydcarmy at any cost (which was a stupid idea and I don't even need to say why) if it didn't completely sideline Syd and obliterate her and Carmy's character in the process. Because that man may be chaotic and stupid as he may be, but Carm always cared about Syd's well-being at the end of the day.

Even after doing something stupid, Carmy always had this worry about asking how she felt about it. And that's what made their relationship different and the heart of the show. He can be distant and cold, but ignoring Syd's wishes? Doesn't give her credit when he was the one who asked her to be her partner in the first place??? The same person who recognized in 3x01 that the credit for them getting through the family and friends' night was solely hers, because he knew he had screwed up everything and didn't deserve to be part of it? Not only that, him being an idiot to Natalie, yelling about money when she was pregnant? Even though she was his only living sister? And that he started going to therapy at her request even though he didn't want to after realizing that yes, she was right? And not going to see his niece because he was more worried about Claire?? The woman who, let's be honest, he didn't like. I mean, he a panic attack thinking on HER!!! And now she is his peace??? Using suspiciously the term that the Sydcarmy fandom baptized Syd, almost as an affront. (And let's remeber Claire was pretty happy talking how she almost kill a teenage. I was bawling my eyes if was me. Weirdo (derogatory))

And speaking of her, Sydney Adamu, my beloved and favorite character, what did they do to you? She was thrown into the corner so much that I couldn't believe it. She is a protagonist and ok, she and Carmy are on tense terms, but why not take advantage of the fact that they are more apart to delve deeper into her and her relationships, find out more about her. Her relationship with her mother and father? Any flashbacks, since there were so many, about Sheridan and how this still affects her? She and the rest of the members of The Bear, Nat, Richie. She should exist outside of Carmy in her own right, but they just threw her in there and gave screen time to Claire and the Faks and that sucks. Which leads to another point, why don't you talk more about the og members of The Bear. Okay, we had Napkins for Tina, fair enough. But what about Gary, Ebra, Many? Marcus, whose mother died barely had any weight? It left a bitter taste in the mouth. If they want to fix this, they're going to have a lot of work to do, because history has taken everything to an almost unsustainable level. It's okay to be a tragedy, but give us the rays of sunshine, so we can believe in the best. And we didn't have that. It was just going in circles and that could cost the entire story.

[agendabymooner]

pocketful of sunshine || dr3 scenario

dad!daniel ricciardo x mom!ofc (måneskin member!ofc)

POSSIBLE EXTENSION TO HERE COMES THE SUN

Summary: Dark curls, wide smiles, clinginess — Beau Ricciardo, the birthday boy, checked off the list of things that made him the Alpha Tauri driver Daniel’s mini me and the Måneskin bassist Lester was the one to confirm that.

Content warning: WHOLESOME FLUFF, brief Italian dialogue + translation, mentions Lando Norris x OFC (Nicola), zoo trip + an Irwin appearing, Dad!Danny loves his boy so much I might cry, too much fluff, frowny and happy baby, nicknames (‘little par’ = see this fic for reference)

Note: My body is on an all time low rn but I’ve had this in my draft for a while so… enjoy xx

a - n masterlist

o - z masterlist

if you’d like to get on one of my taglists, check this post out

“Danny~ what’s taking you so—“ Lester Ricciardo abruptly stopped herself from saying anything more as her eyes were trained on her husband and son. 

It was as if they were caught in the act, both Daniel and Beau Ricciardo’s eyes widening after chatting amongst themselves over the pair of shoes that Daniel had put on the one year old. 

Well… it was more like Daniel was doing the talking while Beau would provide an input or two— a series of babblings that no one really understood. Apparently, putting on Beau’s shoes took longer than expected Lester had to check and see what they were on. 

“Wh- mio caro, it’s almost— eleven,” Lester told Daniel with a baffled voice. “The zoo staff will come looking for us if we don’t head there soon.” 

“Yeah, we’re done here, look at him,” Daniel presented Beau to his wife with a beam. “Handsome boy, no?” 

Lester’s frown softened when she laid her eyes on her son. This little being that once grew inside her body was bigger now and she hated it so much.

Beau Ricciardo was supposed to stay a baby, and it wasn’t as if she could fault him for growing so much. She just wished he didn’t grow this fast. 

Beau’s big smile, despite being small, lightened up her world as much as Daniel’s grin and cheeky comments did. He was so much like Daniel.

“Very handsome indeed,” Lester grinned after Beau’s smile widened at the sight of his Mum. “You’re a very handsome boy, bambino. Vorrei che tu non dovessi crescere così velocemente. Credo di poter incolpare tuo padre per questo, eh?” I wish you didn’t have to grow this fast. I guess I can blame your father for this, eh?

It was as if Beau could easily grasp the Italian words that escaped his mother’s mouth as he nodded eagerly. 

Daniel laughed heartily at his boy’s response and picked him up, allowing Beau to cling to him. “A smart boy, too. My little bilingual boy,” Daniel praised, giving a peck on his son’s cheek. “Only problem is— are your Zia Cola and Zio Lando ready?” 

Now, both Daniel and Lester loved Lando Norris dearly — as if he was family already (god bless his relationship with Lester’s sister and all that) but they both loathed how late he could get on certain occasions. If he was to do that on this occasion— during his godson Beau’s birthday trip to the Australia Zoo — then God only knew what Lester could do to him. He might get strangled or he might be able to get away from it but Lester would aim for the former. 

“Oh mio dio,” Lester swore beneath her breath, her face etching with annoyance before she sighed. “Let’s just leave them— we’re going to be late.”

“I’ll call them,” Daniel told his wife, a smile still resting on his face as he said, “You have to relax—“

“Danny—“

“Beau is one today, my darling,” Daniel grinned, eyes widening as a warning as he said, “We can’t be cranky on such a happy day! That right, bud? Can you say ‘sì’, Beau-Bear?” 

“Sì!” Beau followed suit, raising his arms up to express his excitement and happiness. If only Beau wasn’t Lester’s adorable baby, his infuriatingly adorable smile would’ve led her to pinch his cheeks hard enough for him to cry.

“See?” Daniel gave Lester a reassuring smile before he reached over to kiss her on the forehead, “Happy day, Lori. Your son is growing big like his Daddy and we gotta be happy about it.”

It wasn’t every day someone got to say that they’d spent their first birthday in a zoo with an Irwin. It was Beau Ricciardo’s lucky day, perhaps. Not that he knew; he was only one. 

As he continued to grow, his interest in animals became increasingly apparent. It was one of those things that Lester made sure he knew about, seeing as she spent her free time watching endless National Geographic documentaries about whatever. 

Her free time, or rather a maternal leave from her band and some time away from the media, was time spent with her son.

She knew that Beau wasn’t going to be little forever. She could freely stay at home in comparison to Daniel, seeing as she created her own schedule and built her band from the ground up with her friends. Her job wasn’t as demanding as Daniel’s, and perhaps that was why Daniel wished to retire from racing after Beau was born. 

The Formula One driver wasn’t able to see his son as much as his wife would, and every minute spent on the track was a minute that prevented him from becoming the best Daddy to Beau.

He never truly pointed that out to his wife, but Lester wasn’t blind and had immediately expressed that his career was what would eventually lead Beau to his successes; after all, they’ve got a future world champion in their hands. 

But for now, that future world champion was just spending his time with an Irwin at the Australia Zoo. Beau’s gaze never left the zookeeper as Robert Irwin continued to tell a story about the koala that clung to him.

Lester peered down at her son and caught him staring, making her chuckle quietly and nudge her husband. She gestured to the boy in her arms as Daniel looked down, now giggling as well. Nobody seemed to have caught the laughter shared between the two but Beau as the one-year-old snapped out of his thoughts and looked up to his mother. 

“Ha un accento diverso, no, il mio piccolo? Diverso come papà?” He’s got a different accent, no, my little one? Different like Daddy’s? Lester asked in a murmur, peppering her son’s face with kisses before she continued to listen to Robert. 

“…And she is extremely clingy. She loves physical affection so would anybody like to come say hi to her?” Robert offered. “Mrs. Ricciardo, perhaps? Would you like to give her some love?” 

Lester giggled, “I’ll watch from afar. I’ve got a koala in here myself!” Everybody laughed at the joke, grinning at the boy who continued to attach himself to Lester. “He’s quite clingy as well, too. Much like his Daddy, right, piccolino?” 

Beau’s curious eyes eventually led him to reach out to the koala, slightly pulling himself away from Lester as his fingers managed to reach for the fur of the animal. Sadly, his biggest enemy right now was the ground that was waiting for him to fall and Lester’s arms that kept him in one place. 

He grunted and squirmed in Lester’s arms. Beau’s curious expression turned sour before he exclaimed in frustration, “Ma!” 

“No need to get angry, lad,” Daniel’s typical happy voice dropped an octave, his fatherly voice correcting his son’s behaviour. But Lester’s slight smile had him laughing quietly; they both couldn’t help that Beau’s struggle was adorable. 

“Oh, d’ya wanna hold her… I’m sorry, what's his name?” Robert asked the people around him before repeating their answer, “Beau? D’ya want to say hi? C’mon, then lad. Would anybody like to hold Lily to get her close to Beau?” 

“I’ll do it,” Daniel volunteered, finding himself grinning at the mammal in his arms as the koala was shifted from Robert’s hold to his. 

A photographer, one that was hired for Ricciardo's private zoo trip, had angled to take photos of Daniel and the koala. He then shifted around to take some photos of Beau as the toddler cautiously approached the animal. 

When his tiny hand started to caress the fur of the animal, the koala had then nuzzled her face to his hand with a content expression.

Beau looked up to his mother with an amazed look, his mouth forming an ‘O’ shape before turning to his father who, too, shared the same surprised look as him. 

Daniel then asked, “What do you think, Beau-Bear?” 

Beau turned back to his mother and then his relatives before giggling, patting the koala on the head once more as he grinned endlessly. Lester could really die at the sight of Beau and Daniel smiling.

So much like his father, indeed.

“Beau, Beau— look at Daddy,” the boy glanced at his father before giggling hysterically, hiding at his mother’s chest as Daniel pulled a goofy face. 

“A giggly one, ain’t ya?” Lando grinned at Beau, reaching out to Beau and tickling the boy lightly. 

“His dad is literally the colour yellow,” Lester’s sister, Nicola, laughed quietly. “Go figures, Lando.” 

Lester continued to wrap her arms around the boy as Beau nuzzled closer, her tattooed hand reaching out to massage his dark curls as his face contently cuddled against her skin. 

“Look at ‘im,” Daniel cooed quietly, reaching out to rub Beau’s back. “Such a momma’s boy, ain’t you, mate?” 

“All he wants is cuddle,” Lester rolled her eyes playfully, her wedding band glimmering under the sun as she continued to play with Beau’s hair. “Cuddle from me. Sound familiar?” 

“Oh, hundred percent,” Daniel joked, “that’s all his Daddy, a’ight. You’re also Daddy’s son, aren’t you?” 

Beau ignored everyone, only cuddling with Lester as he quietly rested on her lap. 

“And now he’s ignoring everyone, too— a true Ricciardo, is what he is,” Lando giggled, poking Beau lightly on the side. “Little par, are you becoming like Daddy? You clingy boy.” 

Beau sat straight for a moment, offering his godfather a scowl before resting back on Lester’s chest. 

The couple gave each other a look before laughing quietly. 

“That was a very Daniel thing for him to do,” Lester grinned. “Look at you and act so cranky? Oh my~”

“He’s so mean when he’s sleepy,” Lando’s mouth gaped open, looking at Nicola with bewilderment.

“Oh now that’s his Mum,” Daniel laughed, “you should see ‘er when she wants to stay in bed.” 

“Yeah but out of all the things he could’ve gotten from me, that shouldn’t be one of them,” Lester huffed quietly, nuzzling Beau closer. Then she spoke to her baby, “Bambino— Beau, vuoi vedere un canguro o un orso?” Do you want to see a kangaroo or a bear? She asked, making the boy look at her with a curious expression as he tilted his head. 

Lester sighed. Right, she thought, she hadn’t taught him Italian just yet. 

Nicola, Beau’s aunt and Lester’s youngest sister, repeated the question for the boy, “Which one do you want to see? Kangaroos or bears?”

Beau babbled, making the adults nod. They didn’t really know what he was saying, yet they nodded as if they knew what he wanted. 

“So, see some joeys then?” 

“Mm- no,” Beau said, his partial Italian accent thickening for a brief moment after hearing his aunt speak in that accent. Both Daniel and Lester knew that even if he was to grow up in Australia, Beau was going to have an Italian accent. After all, his Mama’s accent was as thick as it could be and she had family and friends from Italy. 

But Lando couldn’t help but laugh at the accent that escaped Beau’s mouth as he grinned playfully at the boy, “No? What a cute little accent you have, little par. Oh my god~”

“Alright we get it, he’s Italian,” Daniel rolled his eyes.

“No! But did you not hear him say ‘no’ like that before?” Lando almost fell over laughing, not even noticing the toddler as Beau scowled at his godfather. 

Beau’s reactions, despite being a little sunshine like his Daddy Daniel, were copies of Lester’s usual annoyed expression. 

Daniel first made this joke when Beau’s uncle Mateo met him for the first time— when Beau unwittingly scowled when Mateo spoke to him in Italian about moving the baby to Italy with him. 

Nobody gets this reaction from Beau Ricciardo most of the time. Unless, of course, they happened to be his Uncles Scott, Lando and Mateo. And of course, unless they happened to be Beau’s grandfathers Joe and Giacomo. Oh, and Daniel’s nephew Isaac was another usual victim of the ‘Lester stink eye’ despite hanging around most of the time. 

“Stop making fun of the lad, Lando,” Daniel cackled, “look at ‘im, he literally hates you right now.” 

Then Beau added, “Mmm— ba!”

“Argumentative point, Beau, but I’ll take it,” Lando stopped laughing and wiped his tear away. “Fine, I’m sorry for teasing ya, little par.”

“Mm- blav- do~“ Beau continued to frown. 

Lester and Daniel could cry at the sight of their little man. He was the cutest thing to have ever existed. They wouldn’t trade him for the world. 

But Lester was more in love than Daniel was. After all, Beau Lauda Ricciardo was his dad’s little carbon copy.

From the dark curls, dark eyes and cheeky grin— it was safe to say that Beau was Daniel’s little boy indeed. Not even her signature annoyed look could stop her from thinking that her son was, too, an epitome of sunshine and the colour yellow.

♡ moony’s reminder 🅶 (general): @hiraethrhapsody @avaleineandafryingpan @topguncultleader @enhacolor @roseandtulips @woweewoowa @magnummagnussen

[yuesya]

in cursed twin AU, how does Satoru react towards Yuta, since he has a cursed spirit of his own? albeit Shiki is a bit of a different situation and is well-behaved compared to Rika, and has more clarity than Rika

it could also be argued that - putting aside that no one except Suguru has lived to tell the secret - Satoru is comparatively more fucked up than Yuta in this regard because he’s willingly housing Shiki for an unforeseen future inside his body, and that’s considered messed up in the head, kind of? because imagine you have the option of putting Shiki to rest somehow, letting her die in peace, but no — for one, Shiki is well behaved and there’s no problems so far in their situation, so there’s no reason for Satoru to just up and do that. shiki isn’t suffering, isn’t too insane, and by possessing him she can eat and see and experience things for her own (even though shes a bloodthirsty little thing)

so gg Satoru be the first one to delete people who denies his sister this second chance (and he already did lmao)

for two, why should Shiki be the one to die? when it was the fault of fucking Gojo Clan and their father that she ended up like this? it’s not fair, his sister died because of some fucktards deciding she wasn’t worth anything and she has to be the one to pay the price, to give up in this lifetime, to die in order her to be in peace? Shiki deserves to live and have a chance to look at and experience this world, and Satoru is making sure of it even if it has to be through using him

In a way, Gojo Satoru really does love Shiki, and I want to see how a Satoru who has someone he loves to the point of, well, housing them inside his body for almost all his life like in Cursed Twins AU, reacts to seeing Yuta and Rika.

Footsteps sound clearly upon the cold stone ground, growing closer and closer, but Yuta can't find the strength to raise his head. Instead, he curls inwards, shrinking into himself where he's sitting on the uncomfortable wooden chair in his prison.

And, there's no doubt that this is a prison; ofuda seals cover the entirety of the enclosed chamber, and the only source of light is from the flicker of yellow lanterns scattered across the ground, arranged in a strange pattern. Yuta does not recognize any of it, as strange and scary as everything is, but instinct tells him that this is a trap, a cage.

... Good. He deserves it. He deserves to be locked up like this forever, because he-

"All of this is a bit overkill for just a kid, isn't it?"

"This was the best I could argue for, while you were still out of the country. It was either this, or immediate execution." Oh. Oh, Yuta recognizes this voice. "Hello, Okkotsu-kun. Have you been well?"

It's only polite to look at the person who's speaking to you. Yuta doggedly manages to summon up the strength to raise his head.

"... Hello, Geto-san," he whispers. The man who'd subdued Rika-chan and brought him in without any further bloodshed offers him a reassuring smile, then gestures towards his companion.

"Okkotsu-kun, this is my friend, Gojo Satoru. He's the one I mentioned before, who I think might be able to offer a unique insight into your situation. Satoru, this is-"

The white-haired man makes a clearly disgusted sound. Yuta automatically flinches, because there's no doubt that it's directed towards him.

"A master-servant bond, really?" he says, obviously disapproving. Yuta has no idea what the man is talking about.

"Okkotsu-kun is not a sorcerer," Geto-san says sharply. "He's lived a civilian life all this time, Satoru. Remember what I told you? He and Orimoto-chan are childhood sweethearts who accidentally cursed each other; neither had any idea of what they were doing-"

"No, the boy's the one who did all the cursing here, Suguru." There's a strange flicker in the white-haired man's striking blue eyes, crystalline blue shifting to abyssal darkness and back again. But it must be a trick of the light. Human eyes don't work that way. "But for something that was unintentional... hmm..."

Geto-san sighs tiredly. "Your recommendation, then?"

"... You're asking for my opinion? I think... ultimately, it depends on what the two of them want out of their relationship," Gojo-san shrugs. "Although that might be a little difficult to hammer out on the girl's side, given her current state."

Geto-san frowns lightly, a hand coming up to rest on his chin in thought. "Is there a way to make her lucid again?"

"Well, it's not like there's a documented process for this or anything, but with the circumstances being what they are, I think we might have a few ideas," Gojo-san gives him a sharp grin. Then, he turns towards Yuta. "Hey, so. If it turns out that there's no helping your Rika-chan anyways and we can't actually improve her state any, then what are you going to do?"

"What am I...?" Yuta blinks, confused. It's precisely because he doesn't know what to do, because he doesn't want Rika-chan to hurt anyone anymore, that he's sitting here in this prison cell unresistingly. That he's accepted the fact that he's going to be executed, because otherwise... otherwise...

The white-haired man shoots him a distinctly unimpressed look. "It's not that complicated a question, kid."

"I..." Yuta swallows roughly. "I don't... I don't want Rika-chan to hurt anyone."

"Cute, but that's not what I asked," Gojo-san says. "Are you just going to try and kill yourself again?"

"Satoru, that's not-!"

"Let him answer the question, Suguru."

The scary man's eyes flick downwards briefly towards where a deformed hand-knife is hidden behind Yuta's chair. A knife that Rika-chan had destroyed when Yuta had attempted to... wait, how does he even know that?

But the question he'd asked... Yuta doesn't...

...

Yuta doesn't want to hurt anyone. And, he doesn't want Rika-chan to hurt anyone, either. The guilt of living like this, causing nothing but death and destruction wherever he goes, accomplishing nothing but bringing pain to other people's lives... that's not okay, and it makes bile rise in the back of his throat just thinking about it.

"You're the one who cursed her, even if it was accidental," Gojo-san tells him mercilessly. "So what is it that you want to do?"

Let's get married when we're older, Yuta.

We'll be together forever and ever!

That's a promise.

...

"I... I want to help Rika-chan."

"And if you can't?"

Yuta's hands clench into fists. "You said... you said that you might have a way. And, if it's my fault that Rika-chan is like this, then I... I have to do something about it."

"Because it's your responsibility?"

"Because I care about Rika-chan!"

The heavy imposing pressure in the air suddenly lifts; Yuta falls forward, gasping. He hadn't even noticed it creeping up on him-

Geto-san clicks his tongue. "You went a little overboard here, Satoru."

"Yeah, we'll take him on," the white-haired man ignores the comment and grins. "Help me draw up the papers? I know that Maki and the others will be just thrilled to have a new student joining them."

"... Draw them up yourself, I'm not your secretary."

"Aww, don't be like that, Suguru-"

[catierambles]

Blood Moon Ch.17

News of their engagement spread like wildfire through the rest of his family, Sy getting calls from his sisters-in-law the next day congratulating him along with his nieces and nephews (who were old enough to talk) being very excited that Annalisa was going to be their Aunt. She was a big hit with them, apparently. Annalisa got calls as well, having exchanged numbers with them the previous day during lunch. None of them mentioned or even hinted at their “conditions”, so either his brothers didn’t tell inform their wives (or ex-wife in the case of Jake), or they didn’t want to talk about it over the phone. It would have to be brought up eventually, as Annalisa had been correct, they would notice that she and Sy didn’t age as the children got older.

The idea that what made him turn furry also made him immortal was...something he'd unpack later, but the fact that it meant he would literally be spending forever with his Mate, and she wouldn’t watch her Tovaras age and die while she stayed the same, was a comfort.

“Hey, babe?” Sy said as he lounged in the couch in her office and she hummed in response, not looking up from her monitor. “Annalisa.”

“Yes?” She asked, catching his tone.

“What happens...what happens if a vampires’ Tovaras dies?” He asked, “You said that you knew Markus wasn’t because his death didn’t destroy you. What would’ve happened if he had been?”

“You sure you want to know?” She asked and he paused.

“Yeah.” He said finally.

“I’d die.” She said simply, “Not right away, but I...” She sighed, “I saw it happen once, a friend of mine, a member of my coven. His Tovaras, Daniel, died in a car accident before he had a chance to Turn him.”

“Okay.”

“David just...stopped. Everything. He stopped going out, he stopped talking to people, he stopped feeding. It wasn’t just grief, it wasn’t just him being depressed from losing his lover, he was...he was dead inside. We tried to help him, tried to get him to feed, getting him animal blood, human blood from donation drives run by vampires for those who don’t want to take from the source, but he wouldn’t. He couldn’t. He starved to death.”

“Fuck.” Sy said with a sigh, running a hand over his face.

“We had him cremated and his ashes interred next to Daniels’.” She said, “If something happened to you, or if you were still human and refused to let me Turn you, I would suffer the same fate, but I wouldn’t care. You were gone, so I wouldn’t have any reason to live. I’d have died when you did, but my physical death would come later.”

“I’m almost afraid to ask what would happen to me if you died.” Sy said and she sighed. “You know, don’t you.”

“Yeah, Kyle, I do. Wolves that lose their Mates go insane, go rabid, and need to be...put down, for their own sake and the safety of everyone around them.”

“Fuck.” He said again and she got up from her desk, going over to the couch and laying on him gently, her head on his chest and her hands holding his sides. He wrapped his arms around her immediately, holding her tight. “I’m not losin’ you. Never. And you’re never losin’ me."

"The rest of your family needs to be told about us." She said, "Preferably before the wedding."

"I know. I want my brothers there when it happens, so they can keep'em calm if one of them flips their shit about it."

"Pete called us monsters."

"Yeah. Yeah, he did. I'm not holdin' it against'im though, he was just worried about his babies."

"I've been called a lot of things over the years, "monster" isn't even in the top ten of the worst of it." She said and his hands rubbed over her back. "The coven will need to be notified of the engagement, as well."

"How's Eugene gonna take it? He gonna be a problem for us?"

"Most likely, but he'll just have to get over it."

“How do you feel about gettin’ married in a church?” He asked and she hummed.

“As long as holy water isn’t directly involved, I’ll be fine.”

“You good with crucifixes?”

“Jesus Christ was not the first, nor was he the last person to be crucified by the Roman Empire. It was basically their execution method of choice as it was brutal, highly public, and sent a message. Crucifixion was nothing special. If I had a reaction to that, I might as well have a reaction to guillotines or nooses. Besides, there are Muslim vampires, Hindu vampires, Jewish vampires, Agnostic and Atheist vampires, and it would make absolutely no sense for them to have a negative biological reaction to a symbol of a faith that they don’t adhere to.” She explained and he thought it over for a moment before making a small sound.

“Makes sense when you put it like that.” He agreed, “Why does holy water burn you, though?”

“I have a feeling that it’s less because it’s “holy” and more due to the belief of the priest that blessed it. They believe that it’s purifying, so it is. Their belief doesn’t work on crucifixes, though, because as I said, crucifixion wasn’t special or unique. There aren’t naturally occurring bodies of holy water.”

“And the whole silver thing? Ma has a silver candlestick that gave me one hell of a burn that I had to hide.”

“Allergy or sensitivity to silver is something that exists in humans. Whatever makes us us gives us that allergy cranked up to eleven. It’s why before the advent of modern mirrors, we had to avoid them. Not because we didn’t have a reflection, but because it was physically painful to be around them, like we were standing too close to an open fire. Modern mirrors don’t contain silver, so we’re good with those.”

“But the sun doesn’t hurt you.”

“Why would it?” She asked, looking up at him and he paused before giving a shrug.

[warrior-cats-rewritten]

With Thunder released, I think it is almost time to finalize some plans for WCR!A Starless Clan.

Needless to say, MASSIVE spoilers for A Starless Clan, especially book 4, Thunder.

Under the cut are some IDEAS. NOTHING HERR IS FINAL YET AND ALL IS SUBJECT TO CHANGE. Behold, my chaotic note-taking in its raw, unfiltered form.

So. First concept: All leaders are at one point either deposed or killed.

Mistystar dies the same awkward way, but with more emotion this time. She is the leader most of Riverclan has known either all their lives, or most of their lives. However, and I cannot emphasize this enough, Mistystar had dementia. She was holding on by threads before she dropped dead.

Leafstar dies suddenly as well due to a massive heart attack, falling off of Highbranch and breaking her neck. The problem here is, ex-deputy Waspwhisker JUST SHOWED UP. This leads to the release of Waspwhisker's Adventure, where he and the other kidnapped Skyclan cats come home.

'so what'd I miss?'.mp3 moment

Tigerheartstar is dethroned. Berryheart's group is too powerful, and Puddleshine does agree. At least, with staying out of Riverclan. Shadowclan just had a major Greencough epidemic and Birchkit is dead due to it, they needed his support. Shadowsight is also missing.

Cloverfoot, however, picks Berryheart as deputy (Berryheart will have also had an apprentice by this point) and goes off to the Moonpool, only for a larger than normal gray fox to kill her. It leaves Berryheart alone, and, much to Sunbeam's horror, allows her to go to the Moonpool.

Splashtail also races up behind her, and the 2 earn their names.

Enter Splashstar and Berrystar. Frostpaw was too late.

Frostpaw also now time travels with Nightheart, Shadowsight, and Whistlepaw. Nightheart is an idiot who never studied history (though he did study Camp Keeping and Glyphs), but the other 3 (especially Whistlepaw) know to take on differently styled names, referencing heroes they heard of in stories.

Shadow Eyes, Whistle, Frosty Paws, and... The other guy who inspired Night Heart, first deputy of Riverclan.

"Stop laughing at me I PREFERRED LEARNING GLYPHS"

Harestar passes after a long, brutal battle with Blackcough. His Deputy, Breezepelt, is about to go to the Moonpool with his new Deputy Heathertail and Kestralflight, when the dog pack attacks AGAIN. I'm not sure if it kills Breezepelt, but it sure as hell leaves him out of commission. He will, tragically, not become leader. In wake of the events, Heathertail turns to the one cat she has always been able to vent to. Lionblaze. Not as a lover, just friends.

Since Squilf steps down in Squirrelflight's Freedom, she... also won't become leader. I love her so much, but her not becoming leader means Leafpool lives longer, and she actually gets the rest she deserves with her sister and new husband Shrewfeather. Hey, at least she gets to keep being Squilf. I love Squirrelstar but I don't like that name very much, doesn't feel right. I want some canon cats to get caught up on it too because Squirrelflight is such a good name, and she's good humored enough I don't think it would bother her. ANYWAY

Hollyleaf is deputy, and Bramblestar does not want to give up his position, he isn't happy that his Clan now fears him, and that makes him lash out because he 'always knew they were suspicious of me'. Self fulfilling prophecy, my boy. Maybe stop using your huge size and BOOMING voice to get what you want.

When the Clan uses their votes to vote him out, the vote starts with... Dandeliontuft. She completes her arc. She was the first to know that Bramblestar was replaced when he started paying more attention to her, and now she is going to take down the real one.

Is Bramblestar had a nickel for every time he has been snapped at by golden tabby mollies he was related to, he would have 3 nickels. Not a lot, but he doesn't have a concept of money, so that's okay.

They vote against him because his leadership has been nothing but disaster. Which....

Fair enough. Ashfur wasn't his fault but there's a reason no one thought he'd been replaced for a WHILE, longer than in canon. Bramblestar was not liked, most cats were gunning for Hollyleaf to be made leader.

He tries to fight back against this, that he was blessed by Starclan, this is unfair, they were only doing this because of his father, what would Firestar think?

For the second time in Clan history, in broad daylight, a lightning bolt strikes. It is taken as a very clear sign. Starclan has made its approval of Hollyleaf QUITE clear!

But! Boom! A wild Lionblaze and Heathertail appeared!

Lionblaze used Announcement!

"THE MOONPOOL IS CURSED"

it's super effective...

Well, that sucks. But Hollyleaf is smart. She knows that something will be done about it, but in the meantime, take leader names, pick new deputies, and build yourselves up. Skyclan is about to break into civil war, Splashstar and Berrystar are coming down on the other Clans to purge 'outsider blood' and make them "pure" again.

Hollystar names Lilyheart or Rosepetal her deputy. Haven't decided yet.

I know Frostpaw is gonna stay in Windclan for a while, trying to unravel the mystery behind Curlfeather and her group, because there needs to be more to it than what she has been told.

Sunbeam is done with Nightheart's whiny crap, and will probably end up with Myrtlebloom or Finchlight, or back with Lightleap. He is told to get over himself.

Lightleap is now a POV and is struggling with being enough, throwing herself into more and more reckless situations and overworking herself. She needs to prove herself, in her own eyes.

Frostpaw has an epic escape from an animal hospital, also Smoky died of pneumonia between arcs. The three new barn cats are Rosey (tortoiseshell molly with green eyes), Whiskers (black tom with long white whiskers), and Muffin (white tom with blue eyes, deaf in one ear). They had no idea what would happen, but they are young and panicked at the sight of Frostpaw's wounds, calling for the Twolegs, who rush Frostpaw to the vet. She trusts them through her fear, as is her nature.

Jury's out on if she still gets spayed.

Fringewhisker loses her back leg to Berryheart's trials, before she and Spireclaw flee Shadowclan, heading for Skyclan. It may be a shitstorm over there, but at least they will be safe.

Frostpaw is determined to know what is causing the curse, and to get to the bottom of it.

The arc ends with the villains winning, leading to the next arc, Dark Times, because we need to take it easy on how disconnected the arcs are.

Arcs 9 and 10 are Homebrew.

Dark Times and Beyond The Stars.

Also, the book names for A Starless Clan have begun to shuffle, I know the first one is River and the last WILL be Star.

[seledkamari]

Dr. Kyle Lament/Curious Light: A story about how easy it is to shift responsibility to other person when you have money. (Agnst)

Years of life: 26.11.1961—13.06.1990

13.06.1990-now days

Little is known about Dr. Lament’s childhood; it is known that from the age of 11 he lived in an orphanage, and from an early age the boy was interested in helping people and studying the human body. This is probably why he decided to become a surgeon. It is known that Kyle was very smart and successful in his business, although he was quite ... renounced, so to speak, communication was not the main thing for him, an introvert, what can I say. And after many years of studying, the guy was still able to get the job he had dreamed of since childhood, what could have gone wrong?

Remember the title? I think you remember

Money, money, money, only money, rules the world, because with money you can do almost anything, including making mistakes on someone else.

This ruined Kyle's fate and career.

During the operation on July 14, 1989, one of the doctors made a mistake due to which the patient died. The matter could not be more serious, it costs the reputation of the hospital and a long sentence for the doctor... but that guy had an ace up his sleeve. Yes, yes, money and connections. With the help of large bribes and falsification of evidence, Lament was made the scapegoat

Imprisonment, deprivation of a medical license and the last funds, all this fell on Dr. Lament’s head. But help came from unexpected places, although it would have been better not to have come. A shady personality - Headcliffe Peterson released him and hired him...

Laboratory ZX (Zero xenobiotic)..a terrible place, to be honest, monstrous experiments on people and so on..but Lament, fortunately, did not do this. He had a much worse job.

Lament's type of employee is the study of anomalous zones, often life-threatening. And Headcliffe turned out to be a boss who was stingy with protective equipment. This is how Lament got his scars, at one point, his work led to his death...

06/12/1990 Kyle went to the Gate of Light Hotel. but not for a well-deserved vacation, but for the next assignment. Exploring the anomalous zones in "The Backdoor" and the recently discovered "The Rooms". And he will never return from this expedition... Time was up, and the guy, despite fighting for his life, ran into a dead end and was killed by an ancient curse - Haste.

Then Lament became what is now called "Curious Light"

Three employees were sent to search for the guy, but their fates are a completely different story.

Interesting facts:

1. It is known that Curious is Irish by nationality.

2. Before Kyle and the hotel incident "Curious Light" was another person: Hatsu Liber.

•One of my friends came up with this name. Even though I haven't used it.

3.Information that is not completely canonical for the AU: Kyle’s family were cultists, which is why he ran away from them

•In this version, Curious has an older sister, Angel (she is normal person), the character of one of my friends.

4.During his life, Kyle at different times had a pet lizard named Ferum and a hamster named Carotid.

5. After the operation incident, Curious suffers from atychiphobia.

6.Kyle hates A-60 for its...you'll understand later...

7.Curious has difficulty communicating with people and entities. One of the few people he trusts and communicates with is Eran Descartes (Guiding Light)

8. His main task is to contain the entities of The Rooms

9. Kyle loves peaches and anything that has their flavor or aroma.

10. Curious has two forms: Normal and “Enlightened” (the rest of the lights have the same). His height in normal form is +-6.5 feet. and in the second about 7.64 feet.

11. Kyle's favorite book is a collection of problems in higher mathematics and trigonometry

12. Kyle feels slightly guilty for Glitch, Figure and A-500 (about the latter: another character of a friend, more about him in the following posts). For not being able to help them at the time.

(I'm sorry for weird mistakes i'm using translator)

That's all for today, thanks for reading!

[bellatrixobsessed1]

Frozen Lake

Summary: After Nabu dies Stella casts a spell on Layla that lets her dream up her soulmate's memories.

The garden is beautiful. Frigid and beautiful. 

Snow heavily blankets the ground on which a fountain rests, it’s water forever frozen in place. Around the base of it is a circle of flowers, deep blue and violet in color and outline by a sharp dusting of frost.

Spotting the ground and lining the slippery, stoney pathways are dozens of tiny tealight candles. They cast a strange, cold blue glow that seems to keep the snow around them at bay.

And hanging from frozen branches are more candles that illuminate within silvery holders.

There are crystalline flowers in branches that are heavy with snow and encased completely in ice. She doesn’t know how but her sister has managed to climb at least halfway up the tree.

“Come on! Come up here! The view is so pretty. We can watch the sunset together! Oh you should see how the snow glitters on the treetops.” 

And she is certain that it is just as lovely as her sister promises. Maybe even more so. But she is scared. Of heights, of falling, of almost everything really. She doesn’t think that it is a bad thing to be cautious, one of them has to be…

“You have wings, just fly up here!” Her sister urges. 

And she feels silly, why hadn’t she thought of that? “I’ll be right up.”

She carefully perches herself on the branch next to her sister and puts her arm around the girl. The sun bathes her face in gold but it gives off little heat. It is just as it should be. Were it not so blinding she could look at it and see a gentle, iridescent halo around it. 

Instead she watches the ground, the way that hills of mostly undisturbed snow glitters and glints beneath its brilliant rays. Right down the middle, looking as though the animal who had left them there had walked straight into the sun, are moose tracks. She follows them for as far as her eyes can see.

Shadows of trees elongate as the sun sinks further. Gentle gusts send skitters of loose snow skittering across snow that is more densely packed, creating impressive and towering banks all over the tundra. 

“Are you ready to head home yet?”

Her sister shakes her head. 

“You’re not hungry?”

“Nope!”

“Not even a little bit?”

“Well…hmm…maybe a little.” Her sister smiles. 

She laughs. 

She scoops her sister into her arms and carefully brings the two of them to the ground. She ruffles her sister’s hair. “Well that’s good because you begged our mother to make that mint-chocolate chip cheesecake.”   

“Oh yeah! I did! Well come on, come on! We better hurry before dad eats it all!”

.oOo.

Layla blinks. Once. Twice. She rubs her eyes and sits up, waiting for the last tingles of sleep to clear from her head.

“Well! How’d it go!?” Stella asks.

“Give her a chance to wake up a little more.” Bloom laughs. 

“It went…” Layla frowns. “It was beautiful but…”

“But what!?” Stella leans over the bed. “The spell worked, right? Did you see him? Did you see your soulmate!?”

“It worked.” She replies uncertainty. 

“But?” Musa prompts. 

“Oh my gosh, he’s got no sense of style! That’s it, right, he doesn’t know how to dress himself?”

“...Yeah.” Layla replies. “Yeah, I guess that he’s a bit of a fixer upper like that.” 

If only. 

If only the problem were that simple and easy to fix.

If only the problem were that small, small enough for her to be willing to get used to it rather than change it. 

“He’s not your type is he?” Stella asks. “Well, my darling, that is the beauty of falling in love! He doesn't have to be your type.”

“No offense, Stel, but could your spell have gone wrong?” Layla asks. “I really don’t see how I can be compatible with this person.” 

“A spell can always go wrong.” Tecna nods. “But the probability in this case is pretty low.”

“Right.” Layla mumbles. 

“Well you at least have to give him a shot!” Stella declares. “He might surprise you.”

.oOo.

Icy is full of surprises, that’s for sure. But they are never good ones. They come in the form of traps and disguises, sometimes a disguise used to lead the Winx girls into a trap. They come in the form of showing up at Alfea with her sisters and Valtor at her side. Rather she has taken to following Valtor around again. 

By choice or by force, she doesn’t particularly seem to mind so long as she can take vengeance and power. The man is literally about to destroy the magical universe and Icy seems perfectly content to go along with that so long as it can get her another taste of the power she’d lost when Bloom took her dragon fire back. 

Layla shakes her head. She hasn’t done the universe particularly wrong. 

So why?

Why then did Nabu die on her?

Why then did the universe offer Icy up as a potential new lover? 

It is funny, Layla thinks, that Stella had mentioned looks as a reason to not like her soulmate when a pretty face and an elegant aesthetic is just about all that Icy has going for her in terms of finding a lover. 

Do witches even love? 

Last Layla had heard, witches scorn and resent love on principal. 

And so Layla decides that she has to come to terms with being single for life. She supposes that, that isn’t such a terrible thing. Musa seems happier than ever since she has taken a break from Riven. 

A shard of ice sails pat her, nicks her ear. Layla jolts and Icy cackles. “Pay attention fairy or I’ll have you pinned to the wall by your wings.”

Layla smirks as Bloom drifts behind Icy, a ball of flames burning in her palms. But Icy turns around and throws up a wall of ice to catch that fireball before it reaches her. She sends a blast of frigid wind at Layla for good measure before turning her attention fully back to Bloom. 

Layla shakes the stars out of her vision just before she can hit the ground. But Icy had it her good, the chill still radiates up and down her right arm and so she slowly lowers herself the rest of the way to the ground and tries to work the frost off of her arm. She grits her teeth, she will probably need Bloom or Stella’s help to come melt it away but the both of them are occupied with Icy and Darcy respectively while Stormy finds her usual opponent in Musa. 

For himself, Valtor sits back and watches the show until, inevitably, the Trix fall and he is forced to take his turn. What a sad, pathetic creature. At least the Trix can say that they never hide behind someone else for protection. 

Brave. 

She supposes that she can apply that quality to Icy, if she is really digging for redeemable qualities in her. She is also persistent but she uses that persistence to achieve horrible things. 

Loyal comes to mind.

If nothing else she does seem to care for Darcy and Stormy, as much as a witch is capable of that sort of thing. Maybe witches can love. Maybe she just doesn’t understand the language they convey affection in. She doesn’t want to understand the love language of a witch. 

Especially not the witch that blasts her friend right out of the sky. Flora gives a sharp cry. She, Musa, and Tecna race to catch her and Layla feels entirely useless. Especially when Musa is struck down by a bolt of lightning from Stormy, Layla’s own cry of warning hadn’t made it on time. And, to add insult to injury, Icy pelts the music fairy with a rain of hail. 

And in that moment she hates Icy. Hates her more than anyone in the universe.

She looks up at the witch, at the woman who she is supposed to love.

At the woman who is taunting and mocking them.

At the woman who hates them. 

At the woman who would probably kill them if they don’t take her down.

She wonders if it would be cruel to cast the lover’s soul spell on her.

She wonders if she should care.

The spell is on her lips, and she is bringing it to the tips of her fingers. 

She almost sends it Icy’s way.

Almost. 

Bloom strikes first—it is quite an awful blow. One that might have ended a less resilient person. But Layla, after years of fighting the woman, has come to realize that Icy is strangely durable. She has seen the woman take some pretty ridiculous damage and get right back up, angrier and meaner than ever. 

She doesn’t get up this time. 

It is a terrible thing and she feels privately guilty for it, but Layla hopes that maybe now she can cast the lover’s soul spell on herself again and get a better result. 

.oOo.

They have nowhere to go.

Icy hadn’t expected anything less but after his most recent defeat, Valtor has left them to their fates. He, of course, had left an out for himself. Found himself some nice, cozy, and dark place to lurk and hide away in until he regains his strength while she and her sisters find themselves, used and humiliated, on the verge of a grim fate. 

She supposes that she should have seen it coming.

She had to have known that Magix would grow tired of dealing with she and her sisters eventually.

That their had would be, in some sense, forced. 

She can tell that Darcy and Stormy are angry. Angry and…scared. For once they look scared. Truly terrified. And maybe Icy would feel the same way if she wasn’t feeling so empty. She had failed her coven sisters and failed her blood sister. For that their sentence isn’t particularly daunting to her. 

“Magix can no longer tolerate this kind of behavior.” Faragonda says. “The three of you are a danger to not just this realm but the universe at large.”

Next to her Saladin nods, “The magical universe is growing tired of the consistent threat and therefore they have put pressure on us to not be so lenient.”

Stormy feigns a yawn. 

Darcy is biting her nails. 

Stormy doesn’t seem to grasp the gravity of the situation.

Icy hasn’t seen Darcy bite her nails in ages. 

She knows that Griffin is relishing in being the one to deliver the news, “that is to say that we are not to be lenient at all.” She pauses to let that sink in. “The Trix are to be executed by the month’s end.”

Seldom does Icy feel chilled but today she feels so potently so that her entire body stiffens. Next to her Darcy pauses mid-gnaw and Stormy’s eyes widen. Icy thinks that she has actually gasped. “Yo-you’re not really going to kill us, are you?” Stormy asks. 

“Get your affairs in order.” Griffin raises a dismissive hand. “As much as you can while in a jail cell. All we have to do is sign a few papers and then it is done.” 

“But what about my sister?” Icy inquires. 

“Sister?”

It is a story she doesn’t care to delve into. “I have a sister, yes. She is currently a fox, I intended to break that spell before…” before she had gotten a taste of power and ruefully distracted. She supposes that she can’t really blame anyone but herself. And Sapphire will suffer for it. “Someone will break that spell on my behalf, yes?” But what then? What happens when…if Sapphire becomes human? She won’t have anyone to guide her, to help remind her of what it is like to be a human. 

“Well I suppose that you should use your final month to figure that out.”

.oOo.

It should come as a relief to hear that news. 

Finally, after so very long, they won’t have to worry about The Trix ever again. 

And for herself, Layla can find a new soulmate. A real soulmate. 

But it doesn’t. 

Not to her. 

Not to Bloom.

Not to Stella. 

Not to any of them. 

Somehow it makes her sick to her stomach. They aren’t good people, The Trix, but she doesn’t think that they deserve to die. Not when Valtor has gotten away. 

“Well they had to have seen it coming!” Stella declares. “I mean, yeah, I don’t like it either but nothing else has worked and nobody can seem to keep them locked up, they always escape. So what’s left to do? Because the head mistresses can’t just let them keep terrorizing Magix. Something has to be done.” 

“We know, Stella.” Bloom sighs. “We aren’t disagreeing.” But they certainly aren’t agreeing. 

“Well what else can we do?” Stella asks. 

It is the question that nobody wants to answer. 

Because the answer is nothing. 

They can’t do a thing. 

Nothing except return to their home realms for the summer and try not to let it get to them.

But Layla can’t seem to put it out of her mind; that look on Icy’s face. That raw and absolute dread. 

Remorse even. 

It occurs to Layla that, when all of this began, the three of them had just been girls. Three teenagers who had been rewarded for their misdeeds until it no longer suited headmistress Griffin to do so. 

It occurs to her that the three of them never really had a real chance. 

She isn’t supposed to care. 

She isn’t supposed to mourn.

She is supposed to be happy. 

She is supposed to be relived. 

But she does care and she might just mourn a lover that she never had the chance to love and never wanted to love anyways. Maybe it only bothers her so much because it is happening so soon after Nabu has died. Although some would say that four years isn’t all that soon. 

Those people have never lost someone. 

And maybe that is why she had agreed to go when Faragonda announced that, “Icy asked to see you.”

“Which one of us?” Musa asks. There are only three of them at the school still. Bloom had already returned to Sparks. Stella is on her way to visit one of her parents, she hasn’t mentioned which. And Flora is currently on her way to spend the summer with her sister at some volunteer program. 

“She had asked for Bloom but I would imagine that any of you will do. Especially since Bloom isn’t here and won’t be back on time to see her.” 

That is probably for the best, Bloom was particularly bothered by the news of The Trix’s sentencing.

“Do Darcy and Stormy want to see anyone?” Tecna asks.

“Darcy and Stormy will be serving a different sentence. Icy had managed to convince the council that the two of them won’t be a problem with her out of the picture. That she was the one who had been making all of the decisions.” Faragona pauses. “She had claimed that she had used some sort of mind control spell or potion, there wasn’t evidence to prove that one way or the other.”

“I’ll go.” Layla volunteers. 

She’ll talk to her supposed soulmate.

She supposes that she should at least do that.

.oOo.

It is terribly humbling to let anyone, let alone a former enemy, see her in such a state. Hair disheveled, face free of makeup and in need of the shower she is only allowed to take every few days, and wearing a frumpy prison robe that hangs much too loosely on her frame.

Darcy and Stormy visit as often as Light Rock permits and she swears that they see less and less of her with each time they do. She is fading away, becoming a shell of the spirited person that she had once been. But what does that matter, she won’t be a person soon. She won’t be anything at all. Nothing but a corpse. So she might as well vacate her body before that can happen.

She is trying to get them to convince Light Rock to let them keep Sapphire as a ‘therapy animal’ of sorts but Light Rock’s lack of trust and an expectation that it is some sort of trap makes it an uphill battle. And she is quickly losing her fight. 

By the month’s end there is going to be nothing left of her and maybe that is for the best. Maybe this is all very deliberate. Maybe they are slowly breaking her down and whittling away at her spirit until she yearns for death. Maybe it is a mercy that they are helping her embrace death. 

“Where’s Bloom?” She asks when a different fairy is brought before her. 

“She had to go home, Icy. So it’s me or nothing?” Her voice is firm, powerful. Icy has a begrudging respect for that. 

“I guess that it doesn’t really matter who I talk to. I just need someone to do me a favor.”

“You’ve made all of us miserable and you’re going to ask for a favor!?” The fairy seems outright flabbergasted. 

“It isn’t a favor for me. It is one that I’m making on behalf of someone else.” She pauses. “My sister, Sapphire. She’s a good person. She’s nothing like me. She doesn’t even know what I’ve done.” 

Layla swallows hard. 

“Some time ago, a shaman witch had turned her into a fox. I have been trying to turn her back…I’ve gotten distracted but…” She tapers off. It always makes her feel so heavy and so tired to talk about it. “She needs someone to take care of her; to break the curse and then help her readjust to not being a fox. Darcy and Stormy can’t. I…I definitely won’t be able to. Darcy and Stormy can probably step in after they serve their sentences but she needs somebody until then.” She bunches her fists and leans herself heavily against the wall. 

She hadn’t expected to see tears in the fairy’s eyes. 

“I’ll help her.” Layla agrees. “I’ll help you so that you can help her yourself.”

“Help me?” Icy furrows her brows. 

“I’ll talk to the council of Magix.”

Icy shakes her head. “They made it pretty clear that their decision is final.”

“I’m guessing that they don’t have all of the details.”

Icy shrugs. She is quiet for quite some time. “Why would you do that?”

“I just…” Layla falters, seeming to fight to find the right words to say. “I guess that it’s just a fairy thing. We see the good in people. We want to help people. And…”

“And?”

“Nothing. I guess that it just doesn’t feel right to let you take the fall when Valtor is still out there.”

Icy knows when key details are being omitted. But right now it doesn’t matter. It might not ever matter if Magix has its way. “If you can’t get them to budge, will you take care of Sapphire for me?”

“I’ll take care of Sapphire for you.”

Icy swallows. And she tries, but she can’t choke the tears back this time. She doesn't remember the last time that she had cried. 

.oOo.

“She was willing to take the fall for her sisters. Is that not proof that there’s good in her?” Layla argues. “She brought me to that cell to ask me to take care of her sister! She didn’t mention sparing her own life once.” 

The council members exchange looks. 

It has been a grueling day but so far she is finally making progress. 

“What do you propose, Layla?” Headmistress Faragaonda asks not unkindly. “We have offered them many olive branches that were rejected.”

“They’re probably going to be a lot easier to work with now that they realize how serious this is.”

“Light Rock will not take Icy back. The Omega Dimension can’t hold her, she seems to thrive there, in fact. Where do you suppose that we should place her.” Griffin presses. 

“I…” Layla beings. “She can come with me to Tides, I’ll keep watch on her. If you take away her powers, I can handle her.”

Griffin regards her with her lips pressed into a thin line.

“Maybe you should take some responsibility.” Layla changes her tactic. “From what Bloom has told me, you were encouraging The Trix the whole time until it started to make your school look bad.” 

The headmistress draws a sharp breath and Layla knows that she has won. She has backed the woman into a corner. Either she will have to show one final act of mercy to The Trix or she will have to take some sort of fall with them. With Icy specifically. 

And so it is Layla finds herself in front of Icy’s cell. It’s door is ajar and Icy is staring at her with a perplexed look on her face. “You…” she furrows her brows. “You actually did it?”

Layla grins and holds her arm out. “Yeah. I did.”

She takes the hand of her soulmate and walks her to sister. 

Icy scoops the fox into her arms and holds her close, very close. Her hair, still unbound falls over her shoulders. She nuzzles her cheek against Sapphire’s head. She looks like she might be ready to cry again—this time out of joy or relief. The tears are certainly glistening there even if they haven’t been shed. She spares a glance over her shoulder, her lips part but she doesn’t speak. Or maybe she had but Layla hadn’t quite caught it. If she had spoken it was so so very softly. But, come to think of it, Layla swears that she had heard a thank you. 

And finally Layla can see it, why the lover’s soul spell might have pointed her in Icy’s direction.

She clings to Sapphire as the guards slip a magic blocking crown onto her head. It pulses a faint green. 

“Your fate is entirely dependant on Layla.” Head Mistress Griffin comments. “If she decides that you are too much to handle we will proceed with your original sentencing. So I suggest that you treat her well.” 

“Right.” Icy mutters. Layla is surprised by the flicker of relief she feels to hear a touch of the old Icy in that one disgruntled grumble. 

“Don’t worry about it.” Layla says after the elder witch leaves. “I’m a pretty patient person and I think that we’ll get along just fine.” 

“You sound very sure of that.” Icy frowns.

“Yeah. I just have a feeling I guess.”

She will tell her eventually. 

But not now.

“I guess I better give you a tour of Tides.”

“Your cousin already did that.” 

“Tides has changed quite a bit since then.” Layla shrugs. “And besides, Sapphire hasn’t seen it yet.”

“Trust me, that’s a good thing. Once she gets a sense of direction she likes to wander around. And it’s a handful. She doesn’t know how to swim for one thing and…”

Layla can’t help but laugh. “And you’re worried about her.”

Icy’s face seems to flush. “I…it’s more like…” she sighs and concedes in an almost intelligible mumble, “yeah, I worry about her.”

Layla regards the ice witch with a smile. “There’s nothing wrong with that.” In fact is so very reassuring. 

“Right, well don’t get the wrong idea…”

“Don’t worry, you’re still a badass, stone cold, and powerful witch.”

“Yes. That’s correct.” Icy holds her chin up. This is directly contrasted by the fox cooing in her arms and cuddling against her neck. It is rather endearing Layla turns away before the witch can see her own blush.

She wonders what Stella and the others will say when she introduces them to her soulmate. And yes, Icy is definitely her soulmate. Whether either of them want her to be or not.

[lolitastories]

BLACK AND BLOOD

Y/N L/N is the daughter of the Great Khal Drogo although she was raised by the king of the unknown lands. After finding out he died she travels and finds the one who caused his death. Along this adventure she meets the mother of dragons. Jon Snow. Night walkers. We will see if she really has the Dothraki blood flowing through her veins.

Chapter 2:

“Our IronBorn and Dornish allies were attacked on route to Dorne '' Daenerys says as we enter the chamber of the painted tables. “As you know of course” she turns to offer me a chair which I refuse. “Two or three ships escaped. The rest sunk or were captured.Same could be said about Ellaria and the Greyjoys.”

“So with the unsullied taking over an abandoned place. Greyjoys and Ellaria’s support are gone, what are you planning to do?”

“The unsullied will return and with the dothroaki we still have enough men to take over King's Landing” I nod. I get up excusing myself and make my way to the sand. Above a cliff I watch as my people train.

“I don’t mean to disturbed you” I turn around coming face to face with Jon. I give Malakho, my personal dothraki a nod. It was okay for him to leave, I can protect myself.

“What can I do for you-” I didn’t know if to refer to him as your grace or lord. He responded to both in the throne room “Your grace?”

“Jon is fine” he moves beside me looking ashore. “Back home, have you ever seen a place like this before?”

“We have our shores but no, nothing like this before.” I turned to Jon and we both locked eyes. “What can I do for you Jon?” I always thought our eyes and hair were the darks it could ever get but when I looked at Jon this close I stood corrected. His eyes were black, filled with so much pain and responsibilities yet the slight hint of a child is all I can focus on.

“I came out here to brood over my failure to predict the Greyjoy attack. You two are making it difficult.” Our gaze moved to Tyrion walking up to us. “I am sorry if I interrupted princess” he looks over to Jon “Jon” I couldn’t help but smile at his antics

“You’re not interrupting Tyrion” I smile turning my eyes to the shore again

“I'm a prisoner on this island.” Jon quickly remarked

“I wouldn't say you're a prisoner on this island. You're free to walk the castle, the beaches, to go wherever you want.”

“Except for my ship. They took my ship.”

“I wouldn't say we took your ship.”

“I'm not playing word games with you. The dead are coming for us all.”

“Why don't you figure out what to do about my missing fleet and murdered allies, and I'll figure out what to do about your walking dead men.

“ It's hard for me to fathom. It really is. If someone told me about the White Walkers and the Night King–” I turn to look at him. Stress as he pushes his hair back shaking his head. “How do I convince people who don't know me that an enemey they don't believe in is coming to kill them all?”

“Good question.” Tyrions responds

I know it's a good question. I'm looking for an answer”

“People's minds aren't made for problems that large. White Walkers, the Night King, Army of the Dead, it's almost a relief to confront a familiar monster like my sister.”

“I need to help prepare my people for what's coming. I can't help them from here. I'd like to leave.”

“It seems unlikely that you became King in the North by giving up that easily.” Jon turns towards me now. “A man I heard about in the North doesn’t add up”

“Everyone told me to learn from my father's mistakes. Don't go south. Don't answer a summons from the Mad King's daughter, a foreign invader. And here I am. A northern fool.”

“We are not our fathers. Thankfully” I look at Tyrion with a smile as he only nods his head in agreement. “Daenerys could have sailed for Westeros long ago but she didn't. Instead she saved many people from horrible fates, some of whom are on this island with us right now.” My people “While you're our guest here you might consider asking them what they think of the Mad King's daughter. She protects people from monsters, just as you do. That's why she came here. In this time her priority is the queen, she is not to head north to fight an enemy she's never seen on a word of a man she doesn't know after a single meeting”

“She is right. So King in the North, is there something we can do to help?” Jon looks towards Tyrion and nods. On hearing his request we move towards the chambers again.

“So.” My mind was somewhere else as we waited for Daenerys to show up. “Princess?” I could see a faint smirk on his face. I sat across from him as Tyrion and Varys were speaking at the other end of the table. I didn’t say anything. Just sat there staring back at him. “I heard stories about you too. A warrior leading their people across the sea with the mother of dragons. The daughter of the Great Khal is it?”

“Yes”

“Is that the reason that makes you a princess? Khal is some sort of King?”

“No” I responded planly. In his expression I knew he was waiting for more but I just stood my ground.

“Okay. So you said you were from the unknown lands but Dothrakis have their own lands. Omnis right?”

“Yes” I was holding back a smile as was he.

“I can only guess you didn’t grow up with Khal, You were taking in by a family or maybe you are married which somehow-”

“No” he was thinking too much. But then again he didn’t have all the information.

“Dragonglass?” We turn as the doors open.

“Yes. Volcanic glass, obsidian. He says you have a tremendous amount of it here.” Tyrion responds waiting for Daenerys to take a seat.

“Why are we talking about glass? We just lost two of our allies.”

“Which is why I was speaking to Jon Snow, a potential ally.”

“And what does the King in the North want with Dragonglass?” The same question is running in my head.

“Apparently it can be turned into weapons that kill White Walkers and their foot soldiers, or stop them, destroy them. I'm unsure of the nomenclature.”

“And what do you think of this Army of the Dead and White Walkers and Night Kings?”

“I'd very much like to believe that Jon Snow is wrong, but a wise man once said that you should never believe a thing simply because you want to believe it.”

“Which wise man said this?”

“I don't remember.”

“Are you trying to present your own statements as ancient wisdom?”

“I wouldn’t doubt that but if or not that truly is an uncertainty” I stand up making my way to her. “He has every reasonnot to come here. As probably advised by his people, but we don’t lose anything by letting him mine what he finds''

“Let him mine the Dragonglass. If he's wrong it's worthless. You didn't even know it was here. It's nothing to you. Give him something by giving him nothing. Take a step toward a more productive relationship with a possible ally. Keep him occupied while we focus on the task at hand. Casterly Rock.” Tyrion whispers quietly.

“Very well. Lead the way Y/N.” I nod moving towards the door while Jon stays closely behind.

“This way your grace” Malakho walks ahead for him to follow.

“Thank you princess” I rolled my eyes making our way down to the shore. A long path guides the way to a cave. The sun can be seen coming down along with the wind. These are the cleanest winds I have felt.

“Gather yatholat alikh chomak. Kisha tikh zigereo eyak” I tell Malakho. He hands Jon the torch and turns to leave. I sent him to get more men to start mining.

“So are you going to tell me how you came to be a princess?” We walk into the cave taking in the walls and continue on looking for the so-called Dragonglass.

“Khal is my father but not the one who raised me. We moved to the unknown lands and that is where I grew up. My father is ruler of Omnis”

“So you are a basterd?” I look at him noticing the horror in his face “I apologise. I shouldn’t have said it that way?” I laugh shaking my head

“There is no such thing as a bastard in my land. That doesn’t change the fact that it feels wrong becoming one of them”

“Is that why you choose to lead your people with Daenerys?” I shake my head “So why are you here?”

“You asked too many questions now it's my turn” I stop and turn towards him. I could see a slight glimer on one of the walls. So if we got closer we would get distracted and I wanted to know more about the King in the North first. “How did you become King, yout grace?”

“My father was beheaded. Lady Stark and my older brother Robb were ambushed at my uncle's wedding. With the help of wilding and the night watch we took over my home, Winterfell, which was being ruled by the Boltons. Another family” he explains. To many names and too many things have happened already. “The houses of the north came together and voted me as king”

“But you don’t want that title” He shakes his head. “Why not?”

“Because in this land a bastard means somthing. I am not a Stark. Winterfell belongs to my sister Sansa”

“Yet I believe this has more to do with the word bastard than what other people think” I look at him. “The word bastard has been what you were branded as and you seem to take that to heart. You fight for your family, would die for your family, hell travel all this way for your family and continue fighting for them yet you think you are still not worthy” I move close catching his gaze. “And I most certainly feel like your sister Sansa and any relative you may have left love you as a real brother, a nephew, a son, a cousin, and for that a King” I see all thoughts, mainly doubts in his mind. “Should we continue?” He clears his throat, moving to look behind me.

“Yes'' He moves past me and I follow. He moved the torch towards the wall, right to left. The so-called Dragonglass glimering with the light. “We are going to need a lot of men, '' I nod. He continued on his own as I stayed by the entrance waiting for the men to show up.

“Did he find what he was looking for?” Daenerys says walking down the path.

“He found more than he was looking for '' I motioned for her in. Jon appears and tells her to follow.Messandei and I stayed behind outside the cave waiting until they showed up again.

“You like him” I look at her and see a slight smile on her face. “You and him share a kind of stare that can hide millions of emotions. But I swear I saw a light glimer in your eyes when you look at him” I roll my eyes shaking my head.

“That is crazy. I just met the guy, I don’t even know anything about him” Another roll of eyes but this time from her.

“Have you ever heard of love at first sight?” Now that I laughed too. There is no way I am interested in him and there is no way she can tell. I mean yes he has some characteristics that I admire in a person and he didn’t look bad but come on, love? Of course not. “Deny it all you want but I know love, and even if you don’t release it now, you will soon enough” I shake my head. I was about to make a reference to a grey worm when Tyrion catches my eye.

“Where is our queen?”

“With Jon,” Messandei responded. I catch his worry.

“We took Casterly Rock” I let out a sigh. I would say happy news but I have a feeling there is more to that. “They knew we were coming” I tell Messandei to call Daenerys up, she is not going to like the news.

“Where are you going?”

“To prepare the Dothraki, I have a feeling we are closer to another fight” And I was right. Fully prepared to go to a fight, Daenerys sends us to meet up with the queens brothers in the fields of kings landing.

[beantothemax]

This is still a few years pre ot2 canon

Therion knew Partitio would not approve, but it had become a habit. Whenever they were in the mines, he stuffed silver in his pocket. Not a lot of course, but it added up. In just a few months, he had a good pile hidden in the corner of his room.

That morning, Papp had collapsed. Therion would have done anything to help him, but he couldn't afford to miss another day of work. Partitio stayed home to help his father and Therion had to pray he wouldn't be dead when he got home.

He was so very tired and he wanted nothing more than to sleep, but he could not. He had to make sure Papp was okay. His heart sank at the sight of Partitio pacing back and forth outside.

"Is he-?" Therion started.

The look of terror on Partitio's face was one Therion would never forget. He had only seen such an expression when Erhardt nearly died in Olberic's arms and when Ophilia almost lost her dear sister Lianna.

"He looks like a corpse," Partitio muttered.

Therion didn't say another word, only holding his friend tight as they cried.

"I can't lose my pops," Partitio sobbed.

Silently, Therion left to retrieve his silver he had stashed away. When he showed it to Partitio, he got the expected reaction of disapproval.

"I don't care if it's illegal, your dad is going to die unless we get him medicine," he argued.

All Partitio could do was sigh. They left for Canalbrine in search of an apothecary.

Selling the silver was easy enough. Partitio was one charismatic bastard. The people looked at him with stars in their eyes as though he held a solution to all their problems in the palm of his hand.

Finding medicine was another thing entirely. The illness Papp had was far too odd and specific. An apothecary who worked for free did not have the experience to treat him on testimony alone and an apothecary that could charged an arm and a leg for their medicine.

After searching all day, they collapsed on a bench. It was no use, no one could treat him.

"What about the guild in Conning Creek?" Therion suggested.

"He'll be dead by the time we come back," was all Partitio could muster.

There was not much else they could do. Therion stared at the houses as gods know how much time passed. People walked back and forth. The clouds moved in the wind. Linde licked his hand. Children laughed and-

Linde licked his hand.

"LINDE?" Therion exclaimed.

The leopard purred as she rubbed her head against his leg. He nearly cried at the sight of her, happily petting her soft head as Partitio watched in confusion.

"Do ya' know this cat?" he asked.

Before Therion could even answer, he was pounced and pushed to the ground.

"THERI! WE THOUGHT WE'D NEVER SEE YA' AGAIN!" Alfyn laughed as he nearly killed the thief.

"Draefendi blessen Linde and her ability to tracken thee," H'aanit smiled, hugging Therion as well.

For a moment, Therion forgot all about Partitio and Papp and Oresrush. All he could think of was Osterra and his friends who had helped him move on from Darius, his friends who taught him to trust and to love.

And then he remembered Papp.

"A-Alfyn! Perfect timing! M-m-my, wait, no, Partitio's d-d-d-" Therion stuttered as he spoke.

His mouth could never keep up with his mind when he got happy and he giggled as he tried to formulate his sentence.

"Is this one of your friends?" a man asked.

They all turned to see him and Alfyn smiled, "Ah, this is my boyfriend, Therion."

The man smiled and shook his hand, "I'm Osvald, pleasure to meet you."

Two more people came and they introduced themselves as Rita and Elena. Therion laughed to himself thinking of how predictable Alfyn was to have befriended a lovely family of introverts. He had always been like that, helping those who struggled the most with asking for it.

After the initial excitement of meeting an old friend again, Therion explained the predicament him and Partitio were in. Alfyn was more than happy to help Papp and the rest of his group was just fine with seeing the Wildlands.

They left that afternoon, walking well into the night. Partitio had very quickly become friends with H'aanit and asked her hundreds of questions about Linde and in return, her and Elena asked about his odd yellow attire. They shared countless laughs during the walk.

But behind them, Therion and Alfyn silently walked hand in hand. It felt like an eternity since they had held each other last.

"You've changed," Alfyn remarked.

"Hmm? How so?"

"You didn't complain when I hugged you even though I forgot to ask for permission."

"It's been months, I probably would have tackled you if you didn't see me first," Therion laughed.

Alfyn did too. It was wonderful to be together again. Still, in the silent moments, Alfyn smiled to himself. Therion had found a friend he was not scared to share his problems with. He really was getting better.

YOU WERE RIGHT THIS IS MAKING ME FEEL THINGS!!!!!!! GAH!!!!!!!!!!

ALFYN PRACTICALLY TACKLING THERI AS HE RUNS IN FOR A HUG AND THERI ALMOSY CALLING PAPP HIS DAD,,,,,,,,,,,…,..,…,.,. PIE MY HEART

PIE!!!!!!!!!!

[crowskyler]

About a month ago, my grandmother — my last living grandparent, on my dad's side — died. I've been wanting to sit down and write about it, but I haven't been able to actually do it before now.

It wasn't a shock. Her health had been declining for several months, and she'd been moved into hospice care roughly a month or so before. Two types of cancer and various other kinds of organ problems were the culprit. At 95, treatment options were limited, and she'd refused to do anything about it for months. I know this seemed to frustrate my dad, who went right into fight mode the second she needed to go to the hospital. He was carving out a plan with a specialist while my grandmother was sent to a physical therapy and care facility, where he had to fight her insurance tooth and nail — despite her not having able to walk more than a few feet.

Then a doctor from her plan got in touch with him and asked him why he was putting her through this. She was in so much pain from everything. He wanted to fight, but she didn't; she was over it. The doctor managed to convince my dad that she needed hospice care, to put together a plan to make her comfortable. And it worked. My grandmother was in much less pain when she passed, thanks to painkillers. When my dad told me she'd stopped eating, I knew what was about to happen. But my mind didn't really know what to do with the information.

I was at work when he called me, cleaning rooms at the hotel. Luckily it was a slow day and I only had to work a little bit more before I could go home, but I had to come in the next day. I was fine — unless someone talked to me about it, and then I was an instant crying wreck. I couldn't talk about it at all. My coworkers gave me a few hugs — the only people who did, and I'm grateful to them — and I managed to mostly get through the day, blessedly having two days off after that to attempt to process everything.

Or, I thought I was processing. But as I've come to realize, it was much slower than that.

My grandmother was the last of her friends to go, something that I'm sure made her feel pained and lonely; her best friend had died roughly a year ago, a lovely lady named Dorothy whom she'd talked to multiple times a day, for decades. Losing Dorothy took something out of her. Maybe that was the start of all of this. When my grandmother had been admitted to the hospital nearly 4 months ago, I'd started to see the writing on the wall. I'd already done some grieving and worrying. When she passed, I was able to feel a little glad that at least she wouldn't suffer anymore, laying in that bed and wanting to go back home.

As it turned out, my dad and the rest of my family very quickly went into practicality mode. My coworkers had put together a little lump sum for us, very kindly, and I offered to pay for a meal for all of us. A wake situation, or celebration of life — whatever you want to call it. My dad seemed bemused by the offer. Nothing's been organized. Instead, the project has been my grandmother's home. He offered for my sister and brother-in-law to buy it, and that's what they've decided to do, and now that's consumed everything. Sorting belongings, contracts, and finding an estate sale service to clear out everything we don't want. We're still in the middle of that. My sister sold her house and has about two more weeks until they have to move out. The estate sale will be this weekend, I think.

It's not my place to organize a celebration of life, or anything like that, but I've felt the absence. We had a wake for my mom a week after she died. Now, nothing. Just divvying up her belongings. Maybe we're waiting until my uncle can come down from where he lives, in about a month or so, I don't know. But my grief has sat nearly raw within me for weeks. When I go over to my grandmother's house to help out, it threatens to overwhelm me at least once. But with the exception of my brother coming over and breaking down a few times, my family's shown almost no emotion except on the actual day — when I heard it in my dad's voice. It's weird. Aren't we supposed to be commiserating and celebrating her in this time? But instead they're just gutting her house and acting like all of this is such a nuisance.

It's strange to get a hug from my coworkers and not my actual family. The silence has been deafening, from them and from the friends I've told. It's fine. I keep myself operating — mostly. And the lack of anything gave me a revelation, of sorts. When I was fifteen, I decided that I wanted to write. That's what I wanted to do more than anything. When I cleaned out a folder at her house, I found a story I wrote when I was a kid. Just some nonsense, but my grandmother had kept it for all of these years. She'd been an avid reader and had always wanted to read my writing, but after my mother had done so — and criticized it horribly — I became cagey about letting my family read anything. I'd wanted to become a published author, to present my grandma with a book she could read; to make her proud. But that hasn't happened. Depression and full time work have been a huge setback for years. And now she's gone, and I never had anything to show her.

I have many fond memories of waking up in the sun on her couch, while hearing the strum of my grandfather's guitar or the gentle brush on his drums, and smelling their coffee while my grandmother made us pancakes. My grandmother loved pizza, and she would often get it for dinner while I was there — and then we would have a cold slice of pizza for breakfast the next morning, another of her favorite things. She would give me a mini art lesson in the afternoon, or take me out for a walk, or let me play with all of her bead-making materials. In the late afternoon, she'd give me gardening tips while we weeded her yard and checked her tomatoes. In the evening we'd watch television. I'd sometimes beg to watch a nature documentary, which she was also happy to watch, or I'd content myself with whatever she found. On Saturday mornings we'd all watch cartoons together.

My grandmother was the most supportive person I knew as a kid, she would always listen to what I had to say. Even if she found it silly or weird, she would answer with words that made it clear that I was heard. As a teen who struggled with self esteem, it was everything to me. It's hard to accept that we can never talk about animals again (a mutual love of ours), or art; it's even harder to know that I'll never be able to listen to another of her lovely and funny stories. She had so many funny stories about the shenanigans of past pets and friends, and interesting stories about growing up in a rural and much less developed California. She taught me everything that I know about gardening.

And now I have to accept that I disappointed her, just like I've disappointed everyone else.

She would never say so, to be clear; she would hug me and tell me that she loves me no matter what, because that's the kind of person she was. If I said anything like this to her, she would tell me that I'm enough, I'm sure. But I've never managed anything impressive, or even average, and I know people in this family view me as a failure. I wish, desperately, that I had been able to do something to show her otherwise. Instead, I'll just have this emptiness for the rest of my life. No wonder so many people think of the afterlife as a shining place above, where you can watch your family below; future triumphs could be viewed by the dead, giving you comfort in life.

I hope writing down some of this has calmed the churning parts of me that haven't found any rest, these past few weeks. I'd like to start healing from this profound misery.

[deathsbestgirl]

so. when i was a kid, and schools decided to try & scare kids away from cigarettes. and they talked about all the things that happen to your body, the way it causes cancer and what cancer looks like...i went home and started stealing my dad's cigarettes & lighters. i did it a lot. and one day my mom found the stash of them hidden in my room. she sat me down and asked why i had them. i told her i didn't want dad to die and she told me dad wasn't going to die. but i think i held onto that fear, it never went away.

and then it happened. he had stage four throat cancer.

before his diagnosis, he was having trouble swallowing for months. eating took him hours. he wasn't taking it seriously, insisting he was fine. my mom & i were on his case for what felt like ages.

when he finally went to the doctor, she gave him antibiotics, obviously that didn't do anything to help. the second time, my mom went with him and he went to an oncologist.

i had a trip planned with my friend, i told her my dad's had cancer & i didn't know if i could go (we were taking a very long road trip back to where she lived). she was great, but my parents insisted i go. so i did.

i called everyday, and my dad was in the hospital the entire time i was gone. when i got back home, my mom & sister told me that he needed to be intubated, at some point he flatlined but he was stable now.

the tumor in his throat was cutting of his airway when they got him to the hospital. i don't remember what he was going to the hospital for, but it was a shock.

at this time, i was still pretty sick myself. and that week i came back home was the worst i ever felt. but it was different. i can't explain to you the panic i was feeling. we were at the hospital everyday for hours. i was making us food & bringing it with us and forcing my mom & sister to eat something. everyday. i couldn't stay in the room when the doctors came in. and eventually it was more than panic and "feelings of doom" — i was so physically ill. i remember going to cvs to get medicine, and everyone in the store getting out of my way & cut the line because i looked like death. i mean a literal walking corpse. i was *grey*

it turned out to be iron or copper poisoning. as soon as i got my period, i was perfectly fine. i'll never know which because i couldn't get to the doctor in time for blood work. (i stopped taking medications & chinese herbs & supplements i was on and i never had this problem again but. this is the second time i almost died)

my mom was so mad at me for leaving the hospital room. it was one of the first days i was back & we were at the hospital. i think they might have had to remove part of the tumor, as much as they could. and then he started treatment.

before he could, he had to have his teeth pulled & dentures made. he had already lost so much weight, and with chemo & radiation, he only lost more. my dad was never a big eater, or rather, he didn't really care. he ate what was put in front of him (he has nine siblings) and always finished our leftovers the rest of us ignored. but...eating became a struggle for him for a different reason. the man never ate anything sweet. maybe a coffee cake when he was drinking his black coffee. suddenly he craves sugar, because it was the only thing that didn't taste bland or terrible.

the longer treatment went on, the weaker he got. i can't tell you how many times i had to pick him up off the floor. (once, i was napping downstairs and he had to bang on the floor to get my attention. we got him a little siren thing after that, because he couldn't yell loud enough if we weren't close by, and banging wasn't always the best option.) or how i had to take the emergency break off his car so he could go somewhere. or once, he was determined to mow the lawn but he couldn't start the lawnmower, but neither could i (the thing was a dinosaur). i was suddenly bigger than my dad.

he had to have a feeding tube eventually, because he kept aspirating. i had to hide all of the alcohol in the house. he had stoped smoking cigarettes, but he was vaping. his fucking oncologist told him it was okay. i guess this was earlier on when they first came out.

the wound around his feeding tube just. never healed. we took him to the hospital a few times because of it.

i can't remember what happened, but one night we had to call an ambulance. my mom & i followed them to the hospital after we grabbed a few things. my aunt & cousin beat us to the hospital. and when we got there, before we found them, there was some confusion with the ambulances. and they mistakenly told us that he was septic. but it wasn't him, it was another man. and as they were wheeling him in we were so confused. the man actually looked so much like my dad, it was scary. but then someone said his name and we were like no. i looked at him again and was like. oh my god mom that's not him. he has no beard. and that's when my cousin popped her head out and told us where my dad was.

it was one of those things we had to laugh at and my poor dad had no idea what was going on.

whenever my dad was in the hospital, my mom & i would go to the bar with my aunt, uncle & cousin. tbone, the bartender & friend of the family, would send us home with a huge to go cup of our drink of choice. he never charged us correctly. i can't explain what a lifeline they all were. (it was the only time my mom & i would drink after my dad was sick & couldn't.)

there was a time he wasn't sleeping, like he'd be awake for days? one day i went out into the kitchen, and my dad was acting a little crazy. i think this was early on. he had spilled coffee everywhere but he wasn't cleaning it up. which was all very weird, as in i don't think i'd ever seen him spill anything. and he was a clean & neat man. i have no idea what he was fussing about, but i told him i would clean it up and he got so annoyed at me, because he was going to clean it up. but i waited at least ten minutes and he didn't.

after that, my mom got his doctor to give him something for anxiety. xanax, and he could only take half and it would knock him out for hours. it helped him so much though. finally getting sleep made him a brand new person.

early on, i think after that first hospital stay, they gave us an oxygen tank & cpr equipment. teaching us how to use it...but my sister & i we're lifeguards. we knew. and he did have to use the oxygen tank. there was one night there was a power outage, and when you have someone on oxygen in the home, you need to call the power company to alert them. they're supposed to give you priority. i can't even remember how this oxygen tank work, but i guess it needed electricity. i can't even picture the thing anymore, and so much is a blur. but it was not a fun experience. we were on edge.

and my dad. god he was such a goofy, quiet guy. unless you got him talking and he could TALK. he was very unlike himself. grumpy & quiet in a different way. bored out of his mind. he wasn't worried that night like we were.

there was another day, he was going to an appointment on his own. i don't remember what it was for. but it wasn't supposed to take long and he was gone for hours. he didn't have a cell phone, never felt like he needed one. he had tried to go to the medical supply store after his appointment, but he didn't know where it was. but instead of going home, he just kept driving up & down the road it was on. so me and my mom and half the family were driving around looking for him. my mom & i on the phone, and i finally spotted his car and he pulled into the shop rite parking lot. he was so angry & frustrated. all of this was really scary, it was completely unlike him. i think this was another reason for the xanax, and a cell phone. (for the longest time i kept the few texts we had sent each other. eventually lost them when i got a new phone.)

he did go into remission eventually, the chemo & radiation worked...but he never regained the muscles in his throat. he was going to physical therapy (or whatever therapy) to learn to swallow again and there wasn't improvement. the doctors said he physically wouldn't be able to eat or drink again.

and then one day, after i had just gotten back from a trip to boston, i was at work. my sister left college because she couldn't stand being 7 hours away when he was sick. they had a very special relationship i wish i could describe. and suddenly, i get a call from tracey, my mom's friend from work and it was her son i was working with. she told me to leave & get home right away. of course it was like 5pm and a 20 minute drive took at least 30. my aunt kathleen, who i had no idea was even in town, also called me. and i could hear in her voice exactly what was wrong. i don't even know who called me first. i remember texting the group chat with my friends that something was really wrong, i couldn't say it but i knew. through all of it, i had never gotten a phone call like that.

i get home and there's an ambulance outside. my aunt kathleen & aunt joanne are there. my sister is in my downstairs apartment. he had a blood clot in his throat that burst. my sister was alone with him. she had to call 911 & do cpr until the ambulance arrived, and they couldn't save him. it was his half birthday.

i can't describe what i feel for my sister. she wouldn't talk about it and she still hasn't. i had to stop my mom from looking at my dad. i don't think she could have handled it.

i've talked about how i don't remember that week very well. but what i do remember is needing to get his chair out of the house. it's where he was sitting when it happened, and we only got it so he could have an easier time standing.

not too long after...my now wife moved in with us. and then my nanny had to move in and my mom gave me & renata the master bedroom. she couldn't stand being in there anymore. she redid the bathroom & we painted, and she took the smallest bedroom.

after my nanny passed, and the pandemic hit. she took a trip down to cape may with my sister and she came home with a trailer at a campground. she lived down there the entire summer until october. and then she decided she wasn't coming back. she bought a house.

for a few years, we rented the house from my mom until she had to sell it. now it's gone. i haven't felt too sad about it, but i do now.

when it was happening, the only people i talked to about it were renata (wife) and ryn & james (my best friends). more recently, it's been easier to talk about him. it's been 4.5 years. and i have the best friends i've ever had. it's good to remember him and feel a connection to him.

remembering this wasn't easy but i think about it a lot. he never really complained, so he never told us what it was like for him. but how it was during it all isn't how i remember him. i remember him before, from when i was little & the tickle fights. the time i threw a tantrum because i wanted to stay home with him instead of going to school. going with him to the bookstore he worked in (all the books we had without covers) the stories he'd tell me about when i was a baby.m (he taught me to climb out of my crib, i'd pull the cabinet doors off & he's put them back on and i'd do it again) what a weirdo he was calculating his gas mileage. how he didn't vote consistently until i started making him. all the sci-fi shows he watched & that we would watch together. when he wouldn't tell me what the word orgasm meant & just kept laughing at me. the way he would take his sweet time making his coffee christmas morning while my sister was vibrating & waiting for him to sit down. how he only ever wore jeans, even in the ocean. how he walked around the house in his boots. how he hated getting new shoes because they were never the same. the way he always gave me & my sister something for valentine's day. when i needed a cortisone shot in my jaw & he took me and didn't make me go back to school after because i was miserable. the way he danced. he loved 30s, 40s & 50s music. he didn't understand how we could listen to the same songs over & over, but he watched the same things over & over. his love of horror. how he taken (mini series) with my sister. the last picture with all of his siblings. the picture of him & my mom when he's wearing a lime green shirt. him mowing the lawn with the bandana rapped our his head. the way i wore bandanas because i wanted to be like him. the greenhouse we used to have in the yard. how he used to grow pot on our deck and my mom made him get rid of it when i did dare (finding weed in his drawer but having no idea what it was lol). how he collected all the different quarters and kept half dollars & dollar coins. the photos he carried around with pictures of all the kids in our family. the way i'm "just like him" and what everyone really means is probably autistic lol the story about a gay man hitting on him. the time he was arrested at the shore for open alcohol or whatever and the cop was basically a kid lol the way he would swim out really far in the ocean with me & my mom would be having a heart attack and eventually the lifeguards would yell at us to come back in. the way he went on the rollercoasters with my sister bc i didn't like them. the way he barely used crutches for a day after his knee surgery. i think about my uncle kevin telling me how much he loved me & my sister & my mom.

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

LETTERS FROM AN AMERICAN

May 28, 2023

HEATHER COX RICHARDSON

MAY 28, 2023

Tomorrow is Memorial Day, the day Americans have honored since 1868, when we mourn those military personnel who have died in the service of the country—that is, for the rest of us. 

For me, one of those people is Beau Bryant.

When we were growing up, we hung out at one particular house where a friend’s mom provided unlimited peanut butter and fluff sandwiches, Uno games, iced tea and lemonade, sympathetic ears, and stories. She talked about Beau, her older brother, in the same way we talked about all our people, and her stories made him part of our world even though he had been killed in World War II 19 years before we were born.

Beau’s real name was Floyston, and he had always stepped in as a father to his three younger sisters when their own father fell short.

When World War II came, Beau was working as a plumber and was helping his mother make ends meet, but in September 1942 he enlisted in the Army Air Corps. He became a staff sergeant in the 322nd Bomber Squadron, 91st Bomb Group, nicknamed "Wray's Ragged Irregulars" after their commander Col. Stanley T. Wray. By the time Beau joined, the squadron was training with new B-17s at Dow Army Airfield near Bangor, Maine, and before deploying to England he hitchhiked three hours home so he could see his family once more.

It would be the last time. The 91st Bomb Group was a pioneer bomb group, figuring out tactics for air cover. By May 1943 it was experienced enough to lead the Eighth Air Force as it sought to establish air superiority over Europe. But the 91st did not have adequate fighter support until 1944. It had the greatest casualty rate of any of the heavy bomb squadrons.

Beau was one of the casualties. On August 12, 1943, just a week before his sister turned 18, while he was on a mission, enemy flak cut his oxygen line and he died before the plane could make it back to base. He was buried in Cambridge, England, at the Cambridge American Cemetery and Memorial, the military cemetery for Americans killed in action during WWII. He was twenty years old.

I grew up with Beau’s nephews and nieces, and we made decades of havoc and memories. But Beau's children weren't there, and neither he nor they are part of the memories.

Thinking about our untimely dead is hard enough, but I am haunted by the holes those deaths rip forever in the social fabric: the discoveries not made, the problems not solved, the marriages not celebrated, the babies not born.

I know of this man only what his sister told me: that he was a decent fellow who did what he could to support his mother and his sisters. Before he entered the service, he once spent a week’s paycheck on a dress for my friend’s mother so she could go to a dance.

And he gave up not only his life but also his future to protect American democracy against the spread of fascism.

I first wrote about Beau when his sister passed, for it felt to me like another kind of death that, with his sisters now all gone, along with almost all of their friends, soon there would be no one left who even remembered his name.

But something amazing happened after I wrote about him. People started visiting Beau’s grave in England, leaving flowers, and sending me pictures of the cross that bears his name.

So he, and perhaps all he stood for, will not be forgotten after all.

May you have a meaningful Memorial Day.

[Photo by Carole Green.]

LETTERS FROM AN AMERICAN

HEATHER COX RICHARDSON

[acacia-may]

Hi again! I was checking your fanchildren post (that's an amazing list of kiddos) and I'm very interested in the post-apocalypse / dark triad wins AU, please tell us more about it! :D

Hi there! Thank you for the ask and for checking out my fanchildren chart. It's kind of a mess, honestly, so I just hope it made sense. 😅

That AU is honestly a little out there (my sister and I made it up for (angsty) kicks & giggles a long time ago), so I doubt it'll ever come to be anything concrete, but I will try my best to explain. (Since it breaks off from the canon after the Spade Arc, I'll put my explanation below the cut to avoid spoilers and also because it's kind of dark. Just warning you there's a lot of things that are wrong with this one...but it’s really not meant to be taken too seriously...)

Alright so the premise of the AU is that the magic knights succeed in rescuing Yami and William in Spade; however, they don't manage to close the gate. The demons (in league with the Dark Triade) run amok in the world and kill off most of the population. The Heart Kingdom is completely destroyed, and the Diamond Kingdom is completely taken over and given over to Morris who runs human experiments there. The few surviving Clover Kingdom magic knights manage to hold a portion of the Clover Kingdom safely and end up pushing back the Dark Triade and the demons back into Spade. What's remaining of Clover is a completely fortified and walled in area, but the survivors attempt to rebuild there and a select few of the magic knights (more often than not led by Yuno) will occasionally go out into the world to try to figure out what in the world they're going to do about the Spade problem.

Asta and Noelle survived in the post-apocalyptic world for a while. They were a big part of the efforts to rebuild, but, unfortunately, eventually both perished [Asta in a mission and Noelle by being assassinated] shortly after their daughter was born. Nozel named her after Noelle, but he didn't think he was equipped to raise her so he gave her to Yami and Charlotte who aren't in a romantic relationship but have merged what was left of their squads. Little Noelle (Elle) wants to be a magic knight, but Charlotte and Yami have mostly forbidden it because it's too dangerous (under normal circumstances they probably wouldn't be so protective but almost everyone has died here so they're naturally pretty concerned), so they get her a job as a secretary to William Vangeance instead.

William Vangeance has left what's left of the Magic Knights to work in the government (in what I suppose is a "Wizard King"-esque position). He has an adopted son named Langris (Ris) who he rescued from a lab in the Diamond Kingdom as an infant. Langris Vangeance has extremely powerful spatial magic that allows him to travel through time, and his "Uncle Yuno" is particularly insistent that if he'd only train harder and apply himself, they could use his power to go back in time and close the gate thereby stopping the apocalypse. To Yuno's annoyance, however, Ris would much rather use his power to slack off, have fun, and get snacks (like churros which are his favourite food).

Langris Vangeance doesn't know his origin story, and he's not the brightest so he mistakes Rill and the since-deceased Charmy as his parents, thus the "Pappitson" part of his name. [Lisa is a defective but sentient clone Gauche made of Vanessa, and Ris bonded with her because she is "warm and motherly," so he has added "Lisa" to the end of his name as well in her honor]. Langris Vangeance [Pappitson Lisa]'s parents are actually Vanessa and Finral, though everyone thinks that they're long dead. At the end of the Spade Battle in this AU, there was an earthquake that separated Finral, Vanessa, Secre Swallowtail, and Langris Vaude from the rest of the group (and everyone just kind of assumed they all died). Langris died saving Finral's life, and Secre sacrificed herself for her friends (it didn't actually end up killing her though but rather turned her into a bird permanently again, but no one knows that. Bird Secre watches over Elle and Ris, however).

Thinking they were the only survivors and feeling she had no other options, Vanessa brought a badly wounded/half-dead Finral back to the Forest of Witches where she bargained with Her Majesty to save his life. Recognizing the potential of combining Vanessa's fate magic with spatial magic, the Witch Queen saved Finral on the condition that he and Vanessa stay in the Forest of Witches and have a child with the power to travel through time (and therefore prevent the apocalypse). As it's a post-apocalyptic wasteland out there, they didn't really have much of a choice but to stay. They weren't planning to give in to Her Majesty's demands, however, but as time passed, they actually came to love each other and accidentally had twins they named after Langris and Secre.

When the twins were still infants, the Dark Triade and their demon army attacked the Forest of Witches. Her Majesty perished, and they brainwashed Vanessa who took over as Queen in her place and allied with the corrupt Spade. During the chaos, Vanessa pushed Finral and baby Langris through a portal, and they managed to escape before Finral was knocked unconscious and Ris was stolen by the Diamond Kingdom. Finral was rendered permanently comatose due to head trauma but was, luckily, found and taken in by Henry, Grey, and Luck who are living in the woods (and also thought they were the only survivors post-Spade). Little Secre (Re) has been raised in the Forest of Witches with her brainwashed mother, who is a surprisingly good parent for being a villain. The brainwashing modified and sealed away a lot of Vanessa's memories so Re doesn't know anything about her father or twin brother. Eventually, a particularly jaded Gauche finds his way to the Forest and becomes Queen Vanessa's right-hand man and Secre's uncle.

Were this story ever to be written, the bulk of this AU would take place when Elle, Ris, and Re are all teenagers and would mainly consist of them trying to save the world. It would likely start with Elle and Ris running away from home to journey to the Forest of Witches to try to make an alliance with the Queen (who they don't know is brainwashed or actually Langris Vangeance's mom). However, it's such a convoluted mess of a plot and an idea that I doubt it'll get written. It's kind of fun to think about sometimes though, and I've also made a couple of doodles I can share below...

The first image is William with a little bitty Langris Vangeance and their bird feeder. The second image is an older "Little Noelle" and Langris Vangeance (with churros and Rouge who ends up saving his life at one point).