#severus snape x reader x remus lupin | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

darkst4lker · 30 days ago

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detention // remus lupin.

professor!lupin x fem!reader

plot: on your last day of sixth year, you get detention with professor lupin, developing a huge crush on him since then. two years later, you graduated from hogwarts and were invited to join the order of phoenix by the weasley twins, so you arrive at the black family house where you've been provided with a place to stay by the order after recently being kicked out of your home. is then when you discovered that you would have to live under the same roof not only with sirius, but also with your big crush from years ago, remus lupin.

tw: professor x ex-student, nothing inappropriate happened when y/n was a minor, like a huge age gap (reader is 19, almost 20), mostly romance/fluff i guess, a little angst, mentions of the reader being a slytherin, reader is friends with the twins but she's older than them by a year, mentions of smoking, sirius black being sirius black it's his own warning, low caps on purpose.

notes: english is not my first language, thank you for the support on the other one-shots!!! ALSO HAPPY HALLOWEEN!! ♡♡ xoxo.

ps: i wrote this listening to speak now (the whole album) by taylor swift and it was an INTENSE experience.

it was your last day of sixth year and you couldn't believe that your last hours before dinner and taking the train were going to be spent on remus lupin office. now you really regretted following the twin's ideas for once.

in your eyes it was an innocent last-day-of-school prank, but it ended up in you three accidentally setting the whopping willow aflame for like twenty seconds before the three of you managed to stop the fire. yet, professor snape was the one to see the whole sequence of events, meaning he was completely livid and not so forgiving as others professors could be so he sent you and the twins straight to detention.

and that's how you ended up in professor lupin empty classroom, in detention, for three hours. of course snape separated you from the twins, so not only you were going to be sitting in one of the classroom benches for a long time, you were also alone.

remus was finishing getting some papers in order as he supervised you, and you sat quietly in the front row, completely bored as you looked at what he was doing to entertain yourself. in one moment, his eyes went to you, noticing your clearly irritated face.

the moment snape appeared in his door grabbing you and made him take care of your detention time (only to put more work on him last minute, he believed) you made him remember the times he used to do the same stupid shit with sirius, james and peter.

so, for the sake of the old times and the fact this was the last day of school, he decided to make your detention a little bit more entertaining.

“miss (l/n).” he called you, his voice calm as always.

“professor lupin.” you answered, still irritated but with the energy to speak ironically.

“what were you trying to do with the twins?” remus asked you, a subtle smile on his lips. he was looking at his work while he talked to you.

“when?” you answered smiling, trying to play dumb because the fact that the prank went terribly wrong embarrassed the hell out of you.

remus stopped organizing his paperwork as he raised his eyes from his work to give you a serious “don't pretend you don't understand” look, making you sigh in redemption.

“okay, im sorry professor, stop looking at me like that. it frightens me a bit.” you admitted as you rolled your eyes. “we were trying to set fireworks that were meant to activate when everyone went outside to take the carriages.”

his eyes relaxed when he got and answer and he continued with his work. he seemed to be just minutes away to finishing with his paperwork, though.

“you know, when i was your age i did the same kind of things with my friends.” remus said, chuckling a bit.

“no way.” you answered, clearly in disbelief. remus looked at you smiling softly for a moment.

“i swear” he added, and you instantly laughed.

“for merlin's sake!” you exclaimed, enjoying his confession and now feeling less alone than before. “the mysterious and innocent looking professor lupin ended up being a troublemaker, who could have guessed it?” you said, laughing.

he smiled as you laughed, still working on his papers.

“mysterious?” remus asked, an eyebrow raising in curiosity.

“y'know, what the other girls always say about you.” you added, trying to reference the constant things you heard from your classmates. “that you're mysterious because of your-... y'know.” you pointed at your face to reference his scars with all the delicacy you had. being a slytherin didn't helped a lot with having much tact, but for remus you tried. remus on the other hand, was usually uncomfortable with his scars but it warmed his heart a little that his students didn't think his face was completely unpleasant, as he did.

“they also say that you appear to be sweet and kind” you kept enlisting what you always heard, things that you also thought. things, that you firmly believed he didn't needed to know you thought. “and of course what i consider a classic at this point: that you're beautiful.” you ended up, a little smile on your lips.

remus stayed silent for a second before answering. a yawn scaped your lips as you were really tired. the whole thing with snape scolding you and the twins into oblivion had left you exahusted, yet you guessed remus wouldn't let you sleep on detention.

“those are all the things they say about me?” he asked, calmly. his apparently soft lips giving you a warm smile. somehow inside your chest you knew he wasn't as pure as he appeared.

in your eyes, remus had the look of a wounded man who couldn't afford to be innocent because he was already rotting since long ago, his soul marked with the kiss of something beautiful enough to torture a man.

there had to be a reason for the way this man was always looking like he knew something you didn't.

“yes. i think all the girls have a crush on you.” you said, answering his question like if your mind wasn't lingering on the way his fingers moved while manipulating every paper in his desk. that's what finally made you realize that in some point you were included in the affirmation you said, because remus lupin was too kind with everyone for you to handle it properly.

yet, you thought it was natural for you to develop a crush when this man guided your hand with his in class and whispered sweet instructions in your ear when he picked you to make a demonstration. i mean, who would not feel butterflies around him was the right question.

“i never noticed.” he lied, because in fact he did noticed, but it was fun to have someone gossiping with him about the class rumours. not that remus specifically enjoyed them though, but sometimes he felt like a gossip when discussing with, for example, minerva about all the things other students commented about him.

and right now, you were the one making him feel like a gossip. he honestly believed that you were his funniest student but also the most oblivious one.

oblivious, because you truly believed he didn't noticed you were one of the girls crushing on him too.

you smiled at remus, looking at him for a moment. you were aware that he probably lied about not noticing what the girls commented of him. he had this delicate demeanor in his face features that you couldn't fully explain, even if his skin was full of scars.

and every single one of those scars felt like a whole mistery waiting for you to solve. what you didn't knew yet, was that his scars were a prophecy of his damnation.

“i thought every teacher noticed.” you stated, smiling tiredly at him. as your thoughts became a little cloudy, you could notice that you were about to fall asleep, so you felt like you had to ask remus if you could rest a moment, or at least warn him. “professor lupin” you called him.

“yes, (y/n)?” remus answered, using your name. a chuckle settled in his lips as he used the same ironic tone you used earlier when he called your name.

maybe it was the fact that you were sixteen at the time, and your hormones were crazy or the way you suddenly started struggling to stay awake, but something in the way your name came out of his lips made you feel like you had a cloud of furious butterflies inside your body, eager to come out of you. his voice made your name sound so elegant that every letter curled in your guts and twisted your heart like a siren call straight from the deepest ocean.

a subtle blush settled on your cheeks, and you took a deep breath as you noticed how his smell was all over the classroom: chocolate, parchment, coffee, old book pages. autumn.

being in sixth grade meant that the amortentia was on your class program, and after some time alone with professor lupin, you quickly connected the dots of what was exactly the scent you smelt that one time snape put a calderon full of amortentia in front of your class and asked what was it.

yet you were getting too sleepy to deal with the huge crush you just realized you had with remus lupin in that moment. « i'll handle it next year » you thought, like if he wasn't in your amortentia scent, before finally answering him.

“nothing, i was just going to ask if it would be possible for me to take a quick nap here” you asked him, smiling clearly tired. “please professor lupin, snape exahusted the hell out of me.” you added, as if the plea would do something to help your case.

remus looked at you clearly trying not to laugh at the things you said. if you only knew he detested him just as you did, and that he always got exahusted from dealing with severus too.

he let out a deep breath before answering.

“go ahead. you do seem tired.” he said, having a little mercy on you. “i'll wake you when detention it's over.” remus added, now having finished with his paperwork and opening a book he had in his desk. it was the last day of school, and he felt like you deserved a little of good will from him.

you rested your head on your arms against the bench, closing your eyes softly.

“thank you professor, that's why you're my favourite.” you said, finally letting the sleep trap you in his arms.

remus watched over your dreams with the affection only him could possess. the sweetness he lacked as a wolf, he had it as a human.

so, when you had sleep over almost all your detention time, remus stood up from his desk chair and walked over you to finally woke you from your well deserved nap, fifteen minutes before dinner.

“y/n” he said, calmly. “y/n” he repeated.

you opened your eyes, moved your head a bit and looked up at him, standing up in front of you.

“good evening, professor.” your answer came out sleepy, pieces of your dreams lingering on your body.

“good evening, y/n.” he smiled at you from above. “here, take this.” remus said, placing a piece of chocolate in your bench, next to your head. “it'll wake you up a little.”

you didn't answer, as you were still trying to keep your eyes open.

“i need to get all these papers to my office, please leave the classroom door closed when you go to the great hall” he added, ruffling your hair with kindness before grabbing a pile of papers on his desk and leaving you alone in the classroom with the piece of chocolate as his only remain.

when you were awake enough, in the solitude of the classroom, you ate the chocolate piece and left, too excited and flustered with what just happened to remember that you had to leave the class door closed.

after that day you went home, spent your vacations there until your seventh year started, and when you got to hogwarts and dumbledore announced that your new professor of defense against dark arts was going to be alastor moody, your stomach dropped to your feet in deception.

that was the exact moment you damned your sleepy ass and how you thought you could do something about your crush «next year». you couldn't. you wouldn't.

and the worst part is that you knew that even if remus were there, nothing would have ever happen. he was a good man, and you were just a stupid girl thinking you stood a single chance with him. or maybe not, but still you wanted to see him every day again if it was possible.

the first night of your seventh year you cried like a heartbroken girl in your bed because you thought you wouldn't see remus again, and none of your dorm mates knew what happened to you or how they could help.

the only ones who knew what was happening to you were fred and george, because they were your best friends, and even if they did everything to make you feel better you were still crying for weeks like if someone had died.

and, being aware that harry potter surely would know what happened with lupin, the twins borderline interrogated him for days until he spilled out what he knew. so fred and george came back to you with the whole story: lupin was a werewolf and he had to quit because snape sniched on him with the students parents. obviously, you scolded them because harry had enough to think about with someone slipping his name into the goblet of fire but you were extremely grateful, and now you had an excuse to murder snape.

yet, you also had an answer to all the questions you had about remus. why his face was full of scars, why he looked so emotionally wounded, why he always seemed to know something you didn't, why he disappeared once per month. he was a werewolf.

so, settling with the fact that you would probably never hear of him again you kept your broken heart and your silly little crush in a box, graduated from hogwarts and went home. until one day, an owl with a letter woke you up early in the morning crashing into your window. you recognized fred's messy calligraphy.

« dear (y/n):

well that sounded awful. anyways, how is it going? be kind enough to write us a letter one of these days, we've been missing you.

since you're sooo good doing crazy shit with your wand (almost like us) me and george fred george recommended you to our parents for a little organization that's starting to rise again. we cannot explain more since y'know, the ministry is intercepting owls like crazy.

please come on september 9th at night to 12 grimmauld place. don't use flu. or maybe just come to our house first and we can take you there. yes, that's it, come to our home and we'll go together to grimmauld place.

we expect a letter to confirm your answer. or maybe just a letter telling us about you. please write us we're desperate!! and we miss you!!

ps: lupin will be there ;) SO SAY YES!!

sincerely yours,

fred george george and fred fred and george weasley »

you laughed at the whole letter, and when you read about remus being there, you decided to do what they asked you. you quickly wrote an answer and sent the owl back to them saying yes, but your parents ended up finding their letter.

your parents weren't the most tolerant people, being wizards with an opulent life and purist ideas just like the malfoys, so of course they weren't happy about you receiving a letter not from one but two weasleys. and for once you stood up to fight them back, confessing you planned to go with your friends.

that was the last straw, and days before of what fred and george stated, you were in their front door because your parents kicked you out of home with promises of disinherit you. you were a blood traitor on their eyes now.

the weasleys kindly received you and finally explained for what organization they were trying to recruit you: the order of the phoenix.

you agreed to join gladly, out of rage for your parents ideals and out of impotence because you openly believed what harry said: voldemort was back.

and, just as fred and george promised, on september 9th everyone went to grimmauld place, you included. it was a shiny full moon night and when you and the weasleys stood in front of the door, for a second you wondered if remus was okay. if his transformations were painful, if he was going to be comforted after.

when you got inside the house, the weasleys revealed to you that the plan was for you to stay at grimmauld place, and keep sirius black (who you recently found out that was an innocent) company the most part of the year. you were told that everyone would pass from time to time and that remus was probably going to be staying there the most of the time too.

so, you met sirius, who guided you to his deseaced mother's room and told you to leave your things there since you were going to be living there full time. you settled up and after a lovely dinner that molly prepared, you officially joined the order.

it almost felt like a fever dream, days ago you were at your parents house, and now you were joining a resistance and just hours away from seeing remus lupin again. a part of you was excited and other was scared of falling in love with him, heartbeat going crazy just at the idea of sharing a home with him.

you went to bed in the middle of a haze, the sheets embraced you with tenderness as you closed your eyes and the fatigue of all the events clouding your life catched up with you. you had a dreamless sleep until a scream suddenly waked you.

you didn't found time to change as you got out of bed almost running, worried that something had happened. yet, the moment you went down the stairs you saw arthur, sirius, moody and molly (who was clearly agitated and you guessed she was also the one who screamed) looking at someone laying in the sofa of the living room.

it was late for you to go back unnoticed, as sirius instantly saw you.

“(y/n)” he said, tenderly. “i apologize if we woke you.”

you didn't answered because in the exact moment he talked to you, arthur moved from his place and you saw the face you never thought you would ever see again.

remus layed on the sofa, his face was extremely pale and full of scraches, he had a nasty wound on his chest and in general, he looked sick. molly was helping to treat the deep cut on his chest and you quickly realized that was probably what made her scream.

you looked at sirius, your expression soaked in concern for remus state. it was almost unrealistic seeing him like this but you finally understood the violence involved in being cursed by the moon.

it was the first time you saw him in two years but your eyes couldn't fully believe what they were seeing. the one you adored so much in deep secret, was injured and almost unconscious.

a part of you knew you didn't had to seem extremely worried if you intended to keep your secret, but it was hard for you to restrain your feelings.

“is he-...” you doubted before the words escaped your lips. “is he going to be alright?”

no one but sirius payed attention to your presence as they were focused on remus. he looked at you with reassurance as you stood on the doorframe.

“yes, yes. do not worry, he has been worse.” sirius answered, giving you a calm smile. “go back to sleep, tomorrow it's going to be a long day and we'll have a meeting.” he added, as his attention went back to remus.

your feet refused to move for a couple of seconds and just when you were about to turn back and go to bed, remus eyes met yours. his gaze subtly widened and you felt like a deer in lights, provoking you to almost run upstairs just the way you did a couple minutes ago.

but as you left, remus felt ashamed of himself. after not seeing you for so long, suddenly now you knew what he was, who he was. what the beast inside of him provoked every full moon.

at the same time everyone treated his wounds, trying to make him feel better, in his mind he cursed his lycanthropy. remus couldn't help but feel like a constant burden, a beast who had to be kept captive.

as a couple of days went by, you didn't saw remus at all. molly insisted on him resting some days in bed since he was injured and his transformation had been quite violent so you only heard the news that she or sirius brought back of remus state when they went to check on him.

until one night you couldn't sleep, and you decided to go downstairs for a cup of tea. you tried to be silent as you got out of your room in your pajamas and went to the kitchen.

but oblivious as you always were, you didn't noticed that as you prepared your tea, your back facing the doorframe, someone else was also getting into the kitchen but with the intention to get a coffee.

“good evening, miss (l/n)” you jumped back as the teasing voice of remus lupin scared you, making you drop a bit of tea over the counter.

“shit-... prof- sorry-...” you said, surprised and nervous. the words struggled to find an order while coming out of your lips but you realized in time that remus wasn't you professor anymore and that he was probably joking.

the way he said your last name scratched your brain in a oddly specific way. or well, everything he said had that effect on you.

“im sorry, i didn't meant to-...” remus started to say but you interrupted his words, turning to face him.

“don't worry it's okay, i didn't thought someone else would be awake.” you answered, smiling at him.

the moment you looked at him you noticed that remus had the same loving and sweet gaze he had two years ago. all this time you believed that you may had been delusional about your crush over him, that maybe you had set a extremely high standard or that this was all a product of the idealized remus you had on your brain, but no.

as you saw him standing there, a comfortable brown sweater on his body and his now healed scratches on his face you realized that the man you've been crushing on was as wounded and broken as you once remembered. the same tender look on his eyes being a constant reminder of the cruelty of his destiny at the hands of the moonlight.

“you can call me remus, by the way.” he clarified, smiling at you and you nodded.

“remus... sounds good. better than professor lupin.” your answer was a little bold but you felt relief when he chuckled. “so, what are you doing here this late?” you asked as the cup of tea went to your lips and you took a sip, testing the temperature.

“i could ask you the same, you know?” remus smiled as he walked closer to the counter, meaning he was closer to you too. “i was craving coffee, and since the days after the full moon i can never sleep, a night coffee it seemed like a good idea.” he added, as he started preparing one. “also this is the only place in the house where molly allows me to smoke.” he said whispering playful like if he was telling you a secret.

then you gave a quick look at the ceiling and noticed that had some stains. stains caused by the cigarette smoke, you guessed.

you smiled at him and took another sip of your tea.

“are you feeling better, then?” you finally asked him, curious and nervous. the question had been repressed in your chest for a couple of days.

“well, sirius and molly took good care of me.” remus said, still preparing his coffee. “i feel a little numb this time, though. it was more intense than usually.”

“i was a bit worried.” you admitted, looking at his hot coffee on the counter, and then directing your eyes to his.

“i know, i saw you. and i heard you.” he answered, now grabbing a cigarette he had tucked behind his ear. “i thought you were scared of me, by the way you ran upstairs when i looked at you.” remus smiled a bit while speaking, but it became a melancholic smile when he said those last sentences. then he put he cigarette on his lips like a tender death kiss.

you realized how he was probably insecure about his nature. for him, a death omen. but for you, it felt like the moon loved him so much she needed to have him for herself once a month. but it was a exhausting love, the kind of love that consumes you to the core of your being and hurts your soul.

yet you wondered what kind of love remus had to offer, and if he indeed had feelings for someone inside his chest, who would be the one blessed with remus love.

when remus lighted the cigarette, he took a deep drag and released the smoke with a certain elegance that you couldn't explain.

“no, i could never-...” you stopped yourself from saying something you would probably regret. “i wasn't scared, i was embarrassed. i thought i was being intrusive. it was one hell of a entrance after not seeing you for two years, though.”

he smiled at you, more relaxed than before as he leant against the kitchen counter. the hand that didn't held the cigarette was now grabbing his coffee and your eyes quickly made their way to his fingers against the cup. you felt like you were sixteen again, looking at his hands.

when he answered your gaze found his again.

“you're right, it's been a long time.” remus took a sip of his coffee. “i hope you didn't got in much trouble after i left.”

“i became a bit worse.” you admitted. then your lips kept moving, saying things you didn't thought you would ever admit. “i used to have a crush on you, back in hogwarts. i was sad when you left.”

remus smirked, the cigarette separating from his lips before he responded.

“i know, the twins told me some weeks ago, before one of the meetings.” he confessed, a soft laugh escaping his lips. “they said you cried.”

a deep blush crept into your cheeks, and a intense feeling of embarrassment settled in your stomach. you left the tea on the counter, and covered your face.

“oh for merlin's sake, i can't believe they told you.” your hands left your face and you stared at the floor for a second.

“if it makes you feel better, i already knew.” remus said, finishing his cigarette.

you stared at him in disbelief.

“since when?” you asked, feeling like you could die of embarrassment.

“since the day you had detention with me.” he answered, calmly. “it is true? you cried?” remus curiosity won over him.

you sighed, defeated.

“yes, i cried.” your words were shy, but then you became a little confident. “fred and george told me snape was the one that made you quit, so he became my pranks target and i got a lot of detention time.”

remus laughed, and that made you blush even more and your heartbeat raised to the ceiling. he finished his coffee and spoke.

“i pity him, i wouldn't dare to provoke the rage of a young woman.” remus answered. “even less yours.”

“why-...?” you were about to grab your cup of tea again as you responded but his hand moved to the kitchen counter counter in that exact moment, meeting your hand with his.

when your hands touched, it felt like a shock of electricity running through your whole body. you instantly pulled back from his contact, looking at the floor.

feeling like you had your heart stuck in your throat, an inevitable realization came to you like a rush of adrenaline. you were too far gone for this to be only a crush. you've spent two years loving him endlessly, and now that you were with him you could only wonder if you would've kept loving remus like this if the twins hadn't recruited you, and he weren't beside you in this exact moment.

the typical boldness that layed on your chest had left you for a moment and you needed to take a deep breath. when the words came to you, they were far more brave that you could ever imagine.

“what if this crush never faded?” your voice trembled for a second. “what if it became worse?”

remus sighed and took his hand to your chin and forced you to look a him in the eyes in a sweet gesture.

“we can't, i'm too old for you.” he said, almost in a whisper.

“i never cared about that.” you answered in a heartbeat.

“well, i do care. it's not only the age, it's-...” he made a brief pause. “i'm dangerous, (y/n). im not good for you at all.”

“i don't care, remus. i'm not scared of you.” you moved closer, you could be in front of him.

remus was taller than you, a detail that never failed to make you weak before him. you looked up at his eyes.

“you don't even know me properly.” his voice sounded a bit shaky.

“i never thought i did, yet i always had the desire to do so.” everything he had to said, you've already had thought an argument ages ago thinking of all the things he could say if this situation happened.

and you never thought it would, but luckily the gods or whatever above heard the constant plea of your heart.

“i can't keep a job because i'm a werewolf, (y/n) please think of what you're saying for a second-...” you interrupted him.

“you could say your face will turn green every night and i wouldn't care. please, just give me one chance.” you said, almost in a whisper. a sweet plea for him to spare your heart.

remus thought you were a beautiful woman, brave, ambitious and oddly astute. an intelligence made for chaos and not exactly for books, but he knew better than to ruin you and in his eyes just even trying to date you would feel like setting on fire to your promising life.

he was a monster, fearful that his lycanthropy could hurt you or affect you forever, not to mention he was frightened that his children could end up being cursed like him.

but then he looked at you, so willing to have him, so in love and he felt his heart melting.

maybe you could try, right? just a try.

“i-...” remus began to say. “i think we can try.”

you sighed in relief as you got closer to him, your chest almost touching his.

his smell clouded your mind the same way it did years ago and you knew in your insides that if you someone put amortentia in fron of you, you would feel his scent as you once did: chocolate, parchment, coffee, old book pages. the smell of autumn itself.

his eyes, his voice, his smell, all of him provoked your chest to feel like it was about to explode, enchanting your mind like if some sort of love spell was being casted on your soul.

and now, he was yours. all yours.

one of your wildest dreams came true, and you knew your heart needed to seal the moment the best way you could. there was a gift, an offering to be made at the altar of your love.

there was something you never dared to give anyone else before, because no man was like him.

“you know, i saved something special for a moment like this.” the confession came out of your lips as you grabbed his face to lure him like a beautiful nymph and make him lean into your direction.

and even if he didn't say anything. your words hit remus straight on the face, twisting his guts and he just couldn't believe how nervous he was.

when his eyes looked at you as you grabbed his face and got closer, to him you looked divine just as a superior being could be.

in the moment you kissed him, it was a sweet kiss that made remus shiver from head to toe and take his hands to your waist almost like if you were made of glass.

the first time you kissed someone and it was him. it felt like you were putting a blessing on his soul, fixing even if it was just fo a second, the damage of his eternal curse.

remus wondered if he was the one who would fell in love deeper, noticing the control you had over him just with a kiss, how he suddenly could fall to his knees if you asked.

the soft exchange between your lips ended when a voice interrupted you both.

“for merlin's beard, moony.” sirius voice spoke from the doorframe. as remus avoided his look ashamed, you looked at him a bit irritated for interrupting. “don't look at me like that, (y/n). i didn't expected to find people kissing inside my kitchen when i came here to drink water.” he smirked, mocking you both

after a couple of seconds you laughed at his words, and remus followed you. the first fifteen minutes into this uncommon thing you had and you were already laughing at sirius together.

remus felt relieved and for a moment he believed that any difficulties you could have, you'll both be able to work it out together.

maybe it didn't matter if he was a werewolf or if you were this younger, or if he was frightened to hurt you.

because maybe remus wasn't as cursed as he thought.

i hope you enjoyed this, i spent DAYS writing it and im glad i got to release it for halloween!!! xoxo.

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z3tabytez · 3 months ago

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Accidentally deleted this post but it feels impossible to find a harry potter fic that’s actually a harry potter character fic(ESPECIALLY harry) It’s all either straight up smut or some random OC or background character from other fanfics. Feels like all the magic has literally just been sapped out of fan fiction. Why am i seeing Matteo and Lorenzo on another characters tag it’s so annoying.

I shouldn’t have to scroll 10 times just to find a fic of the character that i’m looking for because it’s filled of smut of a character from another persons story.

It feels like people are only in it for hot men, especially when all they care about is fan casts. Where’s the passion!!!? Where’s the appreciation towards the actual actors?!

also marauders fans nobody likes it when you use snape tags in your fics.

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justagirlwholikesadam · 1 year ago

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Crush

Severus Snape x Fem! Reader

Summary: James Potter has a crush on a Slytherin but not just any Slytherin. James has a crush on Severus' girlfriend.

A/N: I had this idea and I couldn't sleep until I have typed it down. By the way, I haven’t read the books so if something doesn’t make sense just ignore it or stop reading. I'm not bashing on James or any one, so don't come for me. Enjoy! -L

WARNING: NSFW, Severus gets the girl, James has a crush, peeping tom, Severus becomes good, high school crushes, Severus gets his happy ending.

Word Count: 4.1K

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James thought someone had cast a spell on him because it was the only way that this shit could happen to him. He was crushing hard on the new Slytherin girl who entered in his 5th year. Harmless crush, he will get over it because he had his eyes set on Lily Evans. Sweet and beautiful Lily but in his 6th year, the new girl entered Quidditch and it bothered him when they played against each other. He found out your name when the announcer called it out when you got a winning score.

After every game he had against House Slytherin he would end up in the locker room. Showering with his cock in his hand as he pressed his forehead against the wall. He jerked his cock as he remembered the tight black trouser you had on. The way you pinned your hair back so it wouldn't get in your face while flying. How flushed your face looked after a game, how your lips looked parted as you breathed heavily.

“Fuc-cck.” James moaned loudly as he came on the tile wall of the shower. He felt wrong for liking a Slytherin, he has to hate them. They were evil and they didn't care about anymore but themselves. However his cock had a mind of its own. It wanted you.

He started to think about you more, the moment he woke up. You plagued his dreams and he dreamt being in bed with you, holding you and talking to you. Sirius and Remus started to talk among themselves when Lily passed by them in the Great Hall for breakfast, James usually followed her like a puppy whenever he saw her but recently James was always deep in thought. None of his friends saw how James would look across the tables when bringing his cup of pumpkin juice up to his lips. Remus and Sirius were on him when he started to choke on his pumpkin juice. Sirius was slapping his back while Remus started to grab napkins from the far end of the table to clean James’ mess. The juice had fallen all over the table.

“Mate, are you good?” Sirius asked as James coughed once more. James nodded before looking over at the sight that made choke.

Severus sat next to you and you were talking to him as you passed him a plate of buttered toast. James couldn't help but look away in jealousy when you leaned closer to Severus’ face and whispered something to him. Severus’ cheeks grew pink at your words and James stood up from his seat.

“I’ll catch up with you guys later.” James said and without waiting for his friends’ response. He quickly walked out of the Great Hall passing Lily without a single glance.

“He's alright?” Lily asked as she walked towards Remus and Sirius. They shrugged their shoulders before finishing their meal.

6th year was coming to an end and James still kept quiet about his crush on you. He pretended everything was normal and kept his guard up whenever you passed by. Summer was coming and the students were starting to get rid of their cloaks and sweaters. James thought he was going to faint when he saw you walking into class. The weather was humid and you wore a short sleeve button down shirt, you had ditches the pantyhose and wore black thigh high socks. James swore he had passed away when he saw your bare upper thighs when you sat down.

He kept looking at your thighs and began to wonder if your thighs were soft, he wondered if you were sensitive there. His eyes began to travel over your body, your arms and your shoulders, he lets out a sigh when he saw you pulling a book out of your bag. You looked ahead and made eye contact with him. Giving him a tight lipped smile you turn back around and face towards the blackboard. James looked around and saw you had an empty seat next to you. He was thinking of an idea to come up to tell Peter. He usually sat next to Peter during this class. James was about to stand up to make his move when you looked over your shoulder and let out a smile, too busy looking at you he didn’t even realize the person you were smiling at. James felt someone pass him and saw they had sat down next to you. He slowly sat back down and realized it was Severus. Peter came soon after and sat next to James who kept quiet throughout the entire class. Peter thought James was getting sick when he hadn't made a joke on Severus who was sitting with you a few feet ahead of them. Unknown to Peter, James was staring daggers at Severus when he saw Severus’ hand get closer to your lap under the desk. He was about to pull away when you grabbed a hold of his hand and placed it under your skirt on your right upper thigh. Severus’ shoulders tensed up when you leaned back and spread your legs wider.

Severus’ hand remained on your upper thigh throughout the entire class and James was red in the face. The second that class was dismissed; he was the first to leave, making a scene that Severus and you look over at the entrance with a weird look. Last year of Hogwarts came and the news about Severus and your relationship was the talk of the school. James and Sirius walked together as a group of girls squealed when they saw the couple ahead of them. Severus and you walking side by side down the hallway.

“What a freak show.” Sirius mumbled under his breath.

“They were cuddling on the train ride here.” One of the younger girls said to her friends.

“Lucius said it was about time before he graduated. He’s their number 1 fan, apparently.” The other said, making the rest giggle at the thought of their oldest classmate cheering Severus and you being together.

“You're telling me Snivellus has a girl before us.” Peter commented as he stood by his friends. “Good for him. They look happy.” James, Peter and Sirius looked over their shoulder at Remus who stood behind him.

“What?! I’m just saying.” Remus said as he wrapped his arm over Sirius’ shoulder and looked over at James. “Heard the girls talking about Lily coming up to you soon.” James tears away from you and looks at Remus.

“Really?” James asked. Remus nodded at him with a smile. They all knew how James wanted to go out with Lily. James tried his hardest to get you out of his mind for the last year, he knew it was going to be hard when he found out you were in four of his classes and two of them you were with Severus.

Severus had changed throughout the summer and James believed it was because of you. Severus did not look lanky at all anymore, his hair looked soft and it had grown longer throughout the summer. His clothes looked fitted and had no holes in them. James almost snapped his quill in half in mid writing when he saw Severus moving his hair to the side and saw a hickey on the fair skin of his neck. James was over the moon when he asked Lily out and she finally said yes. He invited her to The Three Broomsticks the coming weekend. He wanted to joy it, he really did but as Lily spoke her appearance changed into you. He drowned himself in Butterbeer as he tried his best to keep up with the conversations. It didn't help when he saw a group of Slytherin walking inside. His eyes widened when he saw Severus and you walking, holding hands as you entered with the group.

Severus was talking with someone when he sat down next to you casually throwing an arm around your shoulders. He did it so nonchalantly that it made James mad. He looked so normal with you and you leaned against him placing a hand on his lap.

“They look good together.” Lily said then looked back at James who frowned.

“What?” He asked Lily, she repeated herself with a smile. “He spoke to me before summer break.” James grew a scowl. “What did he say?” James asked, about to get up but Lily grabbed a hold of his arm pulling him down.

“He didn't do anything. He spoke and he apologized again. I know he meant it this time. He wanted to say sorry and to thank me for being his friend when we were younger. He told me how he met Y/n and how much he loves her.” James felt ill to his stomach as Lily spoke about Severus talking about you.

“They got muggle jobs during summer break and are saving up to go to Paris after graduation.” James frowned looking down at his drink.

“I’m so happy for him and he told me that he's happy for me too. Y/n told me she’ll kick your butt if you do anything bad to me. She’s really nice.” James looks up.

“You met her?! Spoke to her?” James asked and Lily nodded.

“Yeah, we spoke on the train ride on the first day back to Hogwarts. I saw them both in the cart. Severus introduced me to her. She’s really pretty.” Lily said before taking a drink of her Butterbeer. James quickly changed the topic, not wanting to speak more about Severus and you. He had to get you out of his mind, this is madness, he thinks to himself.

James found himself alone in the hallways after his date with Lily. He couldn't sleep and told Remus he was going to walk for a bit. He needed fresh air, with the map in his back pocket and his wand in his hand, lit up. He made sure no professor was roaming around and he took the shortcuts that he saw on the map. He decided he was going to heat some milk up to help him sleep. He kept thinking how the last year of Hogwarts for him was coming to an end and James couldn't be more happier. He was finally going to get rid of you and Severus. He never wanted to see you again. He believes the distance would be good. He wouldn't have to think about you, he wouldn’t have to dream about you. He has Lily now and he couldn't be more merry about it.

About to make it to the kitchen he froze when he heard giggling coming from inside.

“Nox.” James whispered and the light at the end of his wand dimmed down. Quickly grabbing the map from his back pocket he walked to the nearest window of the hall. He used the moonlight to see who was in the kitchen. He almost ripped the map when he saw Severus and your name standing in the middle of the kitchen. Another giggle rang out and he froze when you moaned Severus’ name.

Leave James. Leave. James, fucking leave. He was at war in his mind when he heard a low moan. He shoved the map in his back pocket and wished he had his cloak. He stares down at the knob as he hears Severus moan your name. It made the hairs on the back of James’ neck stand up.

He doesn't know how long he took but he managed to turn the knob and was surprised when there was no charmed lock on the door. He slowly opens it and looks through the crack of the doorway. James hits the frame of his glasses with the door when he leans forward and his breath hitched at the sight of Severus. Severus was sitting down, his head was thrown back, his shirt was unbuttoned and open showing his pale and smooth chest. His collarbone stood out when he leaned back once more with a deep moan. James looked down to see Severus’ hands deep in your hair. You're down on your knees between Severus’ legs. James can hear you moaning as you sucked Severus off. He can hear you gagging and your wet moans.

He watches as Severus pulls you away from his cock, you're huffing and trying to catch your breath as you stare up at Severus. James can't see your face but the way Severus is looking down at you and the trail of saliva on Severus’ long cock. He knows you are loving it, you love being on your knees for him. Severus leans down to kiss you, cupping your face as he deepens the kiss.

“Please.” James hears you beg with a whimper.

“What do you want, love? Tell me.” Severus asked as he began to kiss your cheek down to your neck. His long fingers are quickly unbuttoning your shirt. James watched how Severus kissed you so desperately as he takes you in his arms.

“I want your cock. I need it.” James bites his bottom lip at your words. Severus helps you stand up and pulls you to stand between his legs.

James watched as you kissed him, wrapping your arms around Severus’ neck. Severus' hands wanders behind you and James feels face turn bright red when he saw Severus' hands go under your skirt, pulling your black underwear down to your ankles. Severus unclip the skirt from your hips and let it drop on the kitchen floor. His hands quickly go up to touch your ass, he plays with it and squeezes it as he looks up at you. James hears Severus and you speaking in low whispers. He hears the words I love you and I can't wait.

“As much as I love your nose.” You said but trailed off with a moan when Severus leaned down to kiss your mound. His sticky hands grab a hold of your underwear and toss them aside.

“I need your cock. Please.” You pleaded, making Severus chuckle as he stood up from his seat. Severus turns you around and leans you over the table. “Mulciber is waiting for his sandwich.” Severus mumbles and groans when you look over your shoulder at him as you grind your ass against him.

“He’ll get it soon. He can wait. He's not going to starve to death.” James can’t help but stare at your bra, the lacy bra looked so delicate holding your breasts. Severus cups your breasts from behind, squeezing them over the bra before one of his hands goes between your legs making you whine.

“Shhh, You have to be quiet. Don’t want one of the elves coming here and seeing you dripping wet for my cock.” James saw a bright smile appear on your face as Severus teased you.

“Sev!” You shouted as Severus propped one of your legs up on the table and pushed you down on the table. James can see you tremble and hears you begging Severus to fuck you.

James without a single thought in his head, take the wand from his right hand and begins to unbutton his trousers and unzips it slowly when Severus begins to thrust into you from behind. Your moans and the sound of skin slapping together filled the kitchen. James is jerking himself off harder when Severus pulled your hair, making you lean back taking his thrusts as you cry out. Severus moans as he kisses your neck, one of his hand pulls your bra down and your breasts are bouncing from how rough he’s fucking you.

“Sev!” You cry out when Severus brings his hand from your tit to your neck, holding it.

James is biting the inside of his cheek to not make a noise. He can taste the copper in his mouth when Severus tells you he’s about to cum.

“In me, baby. Fill me up.” Your voice cracks when Severus pulls you against him and groans as he speed up his thrusts.

“Take it. Take it, love. Take everything.” James watched as you drop your mouth open and began to tremble when Severus’ hand drop down between your legs. James wished the table was out of the way so he see your cunt. He hears it though, he can hear how wet it is.

James imagine your wet cunt on Severus’ face. The comment you made earlier was stained on his mind. You loved his nose, that hook nose that everyone made fun of it is now getting drenched by your juices.

James watched as you came undone as you leaned back at Severus, your leg had dropped down and you’re in Severus’ control. He wrapped his arms around you as he rammed himself inside, his face hidden between your neck and shoulder.

“Fuck-k Y/n!” Severus cried out as he held you tight as he came inside of you. James let out a whine when he felt his balls tighten at the sight of you. Your head is leaning back against Severus’ chest, your tits are bare, your hair tousled and the smell of sex filled James up. He cums in his hand and makes a loud noise.

“Who’s there?!” James jumps at Severus’ voice and quickly runs down the halls with his softened cock in the open and his right hand covered in cum.

Severus slams the door shut and walks back to you as he zips himself up. He hums at the sight of you and grabs the forgotten underwear on the floor. Tucking it in his back pocket, he watches as you lean against the table trying to catch your breath.

“Who was it?” Severus shook his head as he grabbed your skirt, wiping his hand over it making sure it was clean for you.

“No one was there.” He tells you as he wraps the skirt around your hips and clips it together. Severus watches as you begin to button your shirt back up. “I love you.” Severus spoke softly as he finished the last button of your shirt and fixed the collar of your shirt. Severus thinks he will never get tired of your smile. You smile bright at him before leaning forward to kiss his bare chest.

“I love you.” You said wrapping your arms around him. You pressed your face against his chest, enjoying his scent and his warmth. Severus kissed your forehead and hugged you back.

“Five more months.” You mumble against his skin and Severus smiles at your reminder. “Fuck, what kind of sandwich did Mulciber wanted?” You hear Severus ask from above.

“I have no idea.” You say pushing away from your boyfriend and helping him button his shirt as Severus began to accio the ingredients he needed to make a sandwich.

Mulciber was in bed reading the newspaper when Severus came walking in. Mulciber raised a brow at Severus who dropped a bag on his lap and walked over to his bed. Laying down with a sigh, he put his arms under his head.

“Did you ransack the kitchen?” Mulciber said with a chuckle as he took out three different types of sandwiches. Severus looks over at his friend who had a sly grin. Mulciber took note of Severus’ face, his lips were pink and looked puffy like he just finished setting the world record for the longest kiss. Mulciber can see a hickey peeking under Severus’ dark locks. The first two buttons of his shirt were undone and his hair was a mess and Severus looked completely relaxed.

Severus was sitting next to you in the Great Hall for breakfast the next day. He listened as you spoke with your friends about an essay due for class as he filled his plate up with waffles and sausages. He was about to ask you to pass him the maple syrup when he looked ahead and his eyes met with no other then James Potter. Severus frowned and looked away but then looks back again at James and noticed his eyes were on you now. You didn't pay attention, to focus on the meal in front of you and talking with your friends. Severus leans towards you.

"I think I found out who was peeping at us." Severus whispered making you freeze in mid bite and look over at him.

"Who?" You whispered. Severus points ahead with his chin and starts to cut his waffles. You look ahead slowly and looked at James who was talking with another boy, you didn't believed it until James looked back at you and his cheeks grew pink, he quickly avert his eyes from you.

"No fucking way. Why him? Doesn't he hate your guts?" Severus nods at you before looking back at you.

"There's only one way to find out." Severus said before biting into his waffles. "You mean Legilimens." Severus nodded at you.

James knew he shouldn't have looked ahead again. He felt embarrassed after last night, cumming at the sight of Severus fucking his girlfriend. James was about to leave when there was cheering and whistling ahead of them. His friends looked over their shoulders and James looked to see what the people were cheering. The entire Slytherin table were up on a roar as they saw you kissing Severus bright and early in the morning. Severus felt you place a hand on his chest and he almost forgot why you were doing it. He looked ahead to see your plan had worked, you had caught the attention of James Potter. The Gryffindor boy was staring right at Severus.

Severus took a deep breathe and enter into James' mind. Sirius placed a hand on James' shoulder when James winced, saying he just got a headache out of no where. Severus didn't need much time, he ran thorough James' mind with ease and when he found out what he was looking for he got out of his mind. You look over to see Severus' with a small frown as he stared down at his plate.

"I should kill him." Severus mumbled to you and you placed a hand on his leg under the table. "He thinks about you. He has cum at the thought of you. He saw us last night, Y/n."

"No more pranking, remember." You told him, grabbing a hold of his hand under the table. "Do not fret over him. He's just jealous that he can't have what he wants. Let him be. The school year is almost over and we will be out of here."

Severus lets out a sigh but nods at you. He continues on with his breakfast trying to ignore how James craved for you. The end of the school year came and every thought of James vanished away. Severus and you had bigger things to think about and plan. Your friends hugged you and begged you to write to them as soon you and Severus' landed in Paris. Severus' group of friends bid him goodbye and in hushed whispered let him know that he who should not be named was waiting for him when he returned.

In the train to the airport, you looked down at your tickets. Severus had come back to his seat and looks over at you. He holds a vial towards you and you grab it before feeling him kiss your forehead. You open it and you can smell the Polyjuice Potion.

"Sandra Johnson." Severus said as he takes an ID from the pocket of his cloak. Shutting the vial close and tucking it in your pocket, you grabbed the ID, you saw a picture of a older white woman with different color hair from yours. Severus shows you his, a picture of a older man who's blading and weighs more than he should.

"Clyde Johnson." You read the fake ID to Severus. "You have thought of everything." You added as you tucked the fake ID with your plane tickets to the States.

You lean against Severus who welcomed you into his arms. This was the plan, a plan to run away and never look back. Severus knew the Death Eaters wanted him to join, he was foolishly enough to listen to them and visited one of their meeting but at the end he couldn't go through with it not when he met you. You had changed him, he found himself wanting a future with you, away from everyone, away from the war. All of his life he had to deal with pain and suffering from the hand of his abusive father and from his bullies. Severus and you decided the night both of you confessed your love to one another that both of you were going to run away together and start somewhere new, somewhere where no one knows who Severus and Y/n are.

#harry potter fandom #severus x reader #young severus snape fanfic #young severus snape x reader #severus snape x reader angst #smut #sfw #james potter #minor remus lupin #james potter has crush #severus snape gets a happy ending #severus snape smut #cute #happy ending

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jasmines-library · 8 months ago

Note

hi love! idk if you are interested or not but i had an idea of reader being friends with lilly and severus but also with the marauders untill the oh so fateful day were sev ruined his friendship with lilly and reader. i love the idea of lilly ending up in james's arms and reader in sirius's (they are my boys sorry sev🤭)

thank you and again, only if you want! have a wonderful day lovely!

Only Human

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Warnings: Slurs (mudblood), swearing bullying kinda, negativity but fluffy ending

Word Count: 1.7k

⛧ MARAUDERS MASTERLIST⛧

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Severus Snape was resting against a tree when it happened. The castle sat opposite him, just a short way across the clear water. The small ripples created by the creatures in the lake and the summer breeze often distracted him from the book that he rested between his knees and his chest as he tucked them up closely. It was this exact reason that he hadn't noticed the band of robe-clad gryffindors trudging up the slope toward him. James Potter led the group, he wore his signature charismatic grin; a smirk that twinged the corner of his lip upwards and made his nose scrunch beneath his glasses, and he had his wand held loosely in his hand. He twisted the delicate tool between his fingers as you would a drumstick. Sauntering over to Severus, he chuckled at his friends, nudging them playfully with his shoulder.

“Snape!” He jested, calling out to him.

His head snapped up, but he kept his back planted firmly against the tree as the group of marauders ran up to him. He squeezed his eyes shut, just hoping that they would turn and leave. But they were bored and Severus, who had been particularly troublesome toward them, had caught their eyes. Severus inched himself up against the tree so that he rose to his feet and began to turn back in the direction of the castle.

James frowned, a look of mock pity set on his face. “Leaving already, Snivellus?”

Snape reached for his wand, but kept his back to them. “Fuck off, Potter. I don’t want trouble.”

“Don’t you know it’s rude to turn your back to someone when they’re talking to you, Snape.” Sirius asked him.

Severus whipped around quickly, his wand poised to cast a spell at them but James beat him to it; with one flick of his hand Snape's wand went flying across the river bank. He paled, the four Marauders stepping closer to him.

“Nice one, James.” Sirius cheered.

The dark haired boy backed up slowly, setting his gaze. The four of them were edging closer, threatening him with their wands when you spotted them. You had just finished class and were heading over to the lake with Lily, arm in arm. The two of you were over there in seconds when you saw your friends threatening each other. Much to your boyfriend's dismay, you and Severus had been friends from the beginning of the first year. You met him on the train; a shy boy with long hair who didn’t quite seem certain of the world. Lily bonded with him quickly, and you followed soon after. It wasn’t long after that that you met Sirius Black. Charming, brave, daring; he was the complete opposite to Snape, but you supposed that was what drew you to him so much. It was their clash in personalities that made the two clash. It seemed as though they were always doing something to wind up the other.

This time it had gone too far. You were unsure of what Sev had done to wind up the Marauders so much, but you and Lily were skidding to a stop beside them in a heartbeat.

James caught a glimpse of Lily’s fiery hair out of the corner of his eye. “Lilyflower-”

“Leave him alone, James.” It wasn’t quite a demand, Lily never had that sort of aggressiveness in her, but her voice was firm. She didn’t want her friend to get hurt.

“Ah, Evans, Don’t make me hex you.” James sighed, a playful twinge on his tongue.

“I’m serious.” Lily repeated when James refused to lower his wand, letting it loll around between his fingers.

“No,” Sirius smirked. “I am.”

You gave him a hard stare through narrow eyes, and his smirk dropped. “Siri. Please.”

The boy nodded, nudging his friend who promptly pocketed his wand. Severus seemed taken back, his steps faltering. He glanced gratefully in your direction, though his anger and embarrassment were unmistakable in his eyes.

“You’re lucky that they were here to help you, Snape.”

“I don’t need help from filthy mudbloods.”

You had expected many things from Severus, but those words were not one of them. He spat them with venom; malice intending to bite deep. And bite deep it did.

You froze, eyes glassing over with tears. Serverus Snape had made an incredibly low blow; as a muggleborn, it was safe to say that it took some time to come to terms with your letter to Hogwarts. You were excited, of course but your parents were far from keen. Lily experienced the same thing with her sister too. Things didn’t get much better when you arrived at Hogwarts either. Some saw you as ‘impure’. Unworthy. Sev knew this and he had chosen to use it against you. Perhaps it was in a moment of spite, perhaps he hadn’t meant to say it at all. But all that mattered in that moment was that Severus Snape was just like the rest of them.

You could see Sirius glance your way out of the corner of your eye, but when he took a step toward you you backed away.

“Fuck you, Snape.” You spat back at him, trying to hide the waver in your voice.

“You should watch your mouth, Snivellus.” Lily glared at him before turning on her heel and making her way promptly back to the castle before anyone else could say a word.

You were left standing between the two groups, both slightly shell shocked, in silence.

Sirius, now full of guilt, opened his mouth to talk, but you pursued Lily before he could even form the first syllable.

The tears came flooding in quickly after that.

Sirius hadn’t seen you for the rest of the day. and that was partly because you refused to come out of the girls bathroom. He had even tried to get Moaning Myrtle to coax you out to talk to him, but still you refused to show your face as you curled up on the bathroom tile. It made his stomach churn.

His pit of guilt dug itself deeper as he sat in class. Sirius’ leg bounced restlessly during potions and there was just as much ink on the page at the start of the lesson as there was at the end. The detention he was also given didn’t help ease his thoughts. His mind wandered to the worse case scenarios. It was his fault for provoking Snape… What if you never wanted to talk to him again? He was up in an instant when the fateful day came to an end and he could return to the common room. He dragged his feet up to the portrait and muttered the words to open it. Every part of him itched to see your face mingling amongst the crowd.

At first, he didn’t see you. But he managed to make out the crown of your head resting against an armchair tucked away in the corner by the fire. His face softened when he saw the tear tracks staining your face where you had failed to wipe them away properly.

You had spent practically the last two hours crying. Everytime the flood stopped, it seemed to start up again. Severus was supposed to be your friend and he had discarded you just like that. The back of your eyes stung, glassy beads threatening to spill again. When you finally braved it enough to make it back to the common room, you couldn’t bear to go up to your room. You hardly spent any time there anyway because you spent much of it lounging around in Sirius’ bed with the other marauders…and you were angry and Sirius.

No… perhaps angry was too strong a word. Hurt. Hurt by his actions and his and James’ thoughtlessness. Being up in your room would have just reminded you of that. So instead you settled down with a book by the fire trying to distract yourself and let the world move around you.

It didn’t take Sirius very long to reach you. He crossed the common room in a few wide strides.

“Love?” Siri asked hesitantly.

You peeked up at him meekly. Your eyes were red raw and puffy, it made the boy frown. Sniffing, you wiped your eyes with the hem of your sleeve. “Oh.. hi Siri.” you mumbled, not quite meeting his eyes.

“Oh Lovey. I’m so sorry.” He melted, sliding onto the arm of the chair beside you.

“ ‘ts okay. It’s not your fault…”

Sirius scowled. You were far too kind for your own good. He knew exactly what you had been through and made him sick just thinking that you weren’t allowing anyone to take the blame for it. “But it is, Dove. I shouldn’t have provoked him. If I had stopped James and just kept my mouth shut then you wouldn’t have had to come over in the first place.”

A tear spilled from your eyes and all of a sudden you broke all over again. “He was supposed to be my friend, Pads.” You blubbered, voice wavering. “He’s just like the rest of them…”

Sirius took your hands in his, pressing a kiss to them. “You didn’t deserve any of this, my love. I am so, so sorry.”

“Maybe they’re right….” You trailed off. “Maybe I am worthless. If Sev thinks so too then-”

“Shh.” Sirius pressed another kiss to your temple as he scooped you up into his arms. Burying your face into his chest you continued to cry. He trailed his fingers over your back. “You’ve never been more wrong in your life, Lovey. You are worth so much more than that. You’re kind, brave and not to mention the most beautiful girl in the world. You’re worth everything to me. Who gives a crap what they think?”

You sniffled, unsure.

“I mean it.”

You looked up at him, wiping away your tears; a ghost of a smile on your lips.

“I love you.” Siri whispered, kissing you softly.

“I love you too.” You settled your head against his chest, shifting to curl against him.

It was there that James and Lily found you later, entwined with each other and sleeping peacefully. Safe within each other's arms.

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MARAUDERS TAGS:

@hearts4robs @xxrougefangxx

⛤⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽⛧☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅⛤

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velvetcharms · 1 year ago

Text

Brother’s Best Friend

Sirius Black x reader

In which Sirius Black finds comfort in the person he least expects.

The same day that Sirius Black realized his parents were Slytherins was the same day that Sirius had sworn off all Slytherins forever. It started off as a childish thing, a one-sided, unspoken attempt to get back at his parents for all of their strict rules and exaggerated lectures about the importance of his pure-blood ancestry.

When he met James Potter on his first train ride to Hogwarts, the resentment towards Slytherins grew into a shared inside joke. Something that the two of them could continuously throw around. Never mind that James Potter was from a pure-blood family as well. The joke was just another feeble attempt to get back at his parents.

And then, he met Severus Snape. And then, he met the insults and snide remarks of his Slytherin classmates. And then, he had finally decided: there was no good that came out of Slytherin.

So it’s no surprise that when his little brother, Regulus, was sorted into Slytherin a year later, Sirius was devastated. Sirius was silent during the entirety of dinner and even remained silent as he arrived in his dorm. The other boys tried not to disturb him, but they had never seen him so quiet before, and it was starting to disturb them.

“Some evening,” Peter said awkwardly, a yawn emerging from him. Remus gave him a strict look before turning his attention back to Sirius, worry evident on his face.

The silence only seemed to grow thicker until finally Sirius sighed and his words rushed out, eager for release.

“I thought he was different. This whole time I thought he wasn’t like them,” Sirius began.

“I mean yeah, Slytherins can be awful, but he’s your brother,” James replied, attempting to soothe his best friend.

“Very insightful, James,” Remus said sarcastically from his side of the dorm. He leaned back against his bed frame. “But I agree. He’s your brother. You know him.”

“I don’t think I do anymore,” he replied solemnly, his eyes sullen yet harsh.

“Don’t be like that, Sirius,” said Remus, “just talk to him.”

Sirius doesn’t talk to him the next day. Or the rest of the year for that matter. He says what he has to during the summer but when school starts, he goes back to ignoring him.

It’s not easy to pretend that Regulus doesn’t exist. He started to play quidditch. He is one of the smartest in his year. And he’s always seen with a Slytherin girl that is in Sirius’ potions class. She’s reserved and intelligent. She seems polite enough. She talks with Lily Evans. She’s even pretty. But she’s also a Slytherin and Sirius believes that’s a good enough reason not to trust her.

She’s always with Regulus. They sit together in the Great Hall. They walk in the corridors together. Sirius spots her one day leaning against Regulus’ shoulder, laughing loudly at something he said. Sirius resents her for it. He hates her for knowing Regulus.

Later that day, Sirius is walking into Potions class when he spots her talking with Lily Evans. He tries to walk past unbothered, but then he hears her mention Regulus’ name.

“Regulus and I have a bet,” she says with a laugh. Sirius tries to ignore how sweet her laugh sounds.

“Is that right?” Lily chuckles and shakes her head.

“He’s the best seeker that’s ever been. Write it down. This Saturday. You’ll see.”

“He really doesn’t think he’ll catch the snitch?” Lily wonders curiously.

The girl responds back with a small pout. “He doubts himself a lot. I hate it. But I’ll win the bet, and he’ll see.”

Sirius rolls his eyes and continues walking. What does she know? Regulus is his brother after all.

Their conversation leaves him with an irritation that follows him the rest of the day and a worry that maybe he doesn’t know his brother anymore. James has tried cheering him up, but Sirius continues his sulking all day. He hardly eats anything when they sit down in the Great Hall. He goes to bed as soon as they make their way to the dorms. No one bothers him.

The next morning, the marauders don’t even have to ask Sirius what’s wrong. He wakes up determined and explains the whole situation to them.

“He doubts himself sometimes. I hate it,” Sirius says, mocking the girl as his story comes to an end. He shakes his head furiously.

“Are you talking about y/n?” asks Remus.

“Y/n? I don’t even know who that is. Did you hear anything that I even said?” Sirius looks as if Remus has just deeply betrayed him.

“The girl you keep complaining about. She’s Lily’s partner in potions,” says Remus as if this is common knowledge.

“A friend of Lily’s is a friend of mine,” says James, a teasing smile on his face.

Sirius thinks that maybe, given a different circumstance, he might have laughed. But James is supposed to always be on his side, so he makes a face of disgust instead. “You too? Peter?”

“She’s quite pretty,” He responds with a shrug of his shoulders.

“She’s a Slytherin,” Sirius mutters, but it’s loud enough for the rest of them to catch it.

“Really?” Remus rolls his eyes, “I thought we were past all of the house prejudice or whatever you’d like to call it.”

“That’s not why I don’t like her,” Sirius lies, quickly defending himself. He pauses as he struggles to come up with another valid reason. He continues on anyway, “she’s very… assuming. How can she possibly know how Regulus feels? I’m his brother. If anyone knows him it’s me.”

The three of the boys share a knowing look.

“Sirius,” Peter speaks up hesitantly “when’s the last time you even spoke to Regulus?”

Sirius isn’t sure why that question hits him as hard as it does, but it hurts. Surely it wasn’t that long ago. They spoke a little during last summer whenever he wasn’t at James’ house…

Sirius decides that he doesn’t owe any of them an explanation. He stands up quickly and mutters a faint, “excuse me.”

Sirius’ urge to run away leads him to the front of Hogwarts’ entrance. He finds it ironic that the first thing he notices as he exits Hogwarts’ front doors is the Slytherin girl, or Y/n as she sits alone near the Great Lake.

Sirius had no time to think about the reckless act he was about to make. He was fueled by the anger of Peter’s question and the fact that he really didn’t know when the last time he had spoken to his brother was. He figured the only obvious option was to blame her. The girl with soft eyes and a determined expression. The girl sitting with her back against the tree, seeming not to notice the ruckus of the other students around her, not even noticing Sirius’ haste steps towards her as she stares into her book.

“Y/n, is it?” he says finally as he comes to an abrupt stop in front of her. In a quick second, her eyebrows furrow and her gaze is on him. Her eyes even widen a little bit.

She takes a few seconds to respond, and in all of those few seconds, Sirius can feel himself growing impatient. Before she can even finish saying yes, Sirius cuts her off.

“It’s a bit cold out here to be reading don’t you think?” his tone is harsh.

“What?” she replies confused, and Sirius almost feels bad. Almost.

“It’s just that it’s cold, and you’re not even wearing a jacket and…” Sirius’ voice begins to falter. His pride doesn’t let him stop. “I’m Regulus’ brother.”

She nods. “I know that,” she says sharply.

Sirius is immediately taken aback.

“Fine. Who are you anyway, his girlfriend or something?” he replies back with the same sharpness in his tone.

She laughs loudly enough to surprise him. He looks at her in confusion, and she shakes her head. “Who are you to ask something like that? You won’t even look at him.”

Sirius tries not to let that hurt him, but it does. “I’m his brother.” He keeps saying this. He’s hoping that after saying it enough times this simple fact will make up for everything else.

“No. I’m not his girlfriend,” she replies.

“You just seem to always be with him,” Sirius presses on, and he knows he shouldn’t, but some pathetic part of him feels like by talking to her, he’s kind of talking to Regulus.

“He’s my best friend.” With those simple words, Sirius has the daunting feeling that he has completely lost his brother. He doesn’t say anything for a few seconds, and Y/n just stares up at him curiously.

“Why are you speaking to me, Sirius?” she asks after moments of silence.

“I don’t know,” he admits because isn’t it just the truth? He doesn’t know.

Y/n continues to stare at him, and it kind of annoys Sirius until she finally says, in a calm voice, “Talk to him before the match tomorrow.”

Sirius doesn’t really understand, but before he can ask, she’s adding on.

“ ‘Good luck’ or ‘you’re going down’ I don’t care what it is. Talk to him.” And with that, she goes back to her book.

Sirius is going to talk to him. The game is about to start, and Regulus is right there. He’s going to talk to him any minute now…

Regulus is already focused on the game. Most people have a hard time understanding Regulus, but to Sirius it comes naturally. He can see the way worry flickers across his face before immediately being pushed away. He feels the urge to reach out, to comfort him. And now he understands why Y/n had asked him to say something; he understands her conversation with Lily.

The whistle blows and Regulus is about to fly when Sirius blurts it out.

“Good luck,” he says to Regulus. Regulus is undoubtedly surprised. His eyebrows raise, and he’s quiet for a few seconds.

Then, he simply nods, “Sure, you too.”

Regulus doesn’t sound bitter. The interaction between them almost feels natural. Sirius smiles lightly. Although, it doesn’t take long for the brief happiness to subside into a feeling of guilt. He spent so much time resenting his brother for something outside of his control. He has a sinking feeling that he was wrong.

He tries to find Y/n in the stands, and when he does he breathes in sharply at the sight. She is smiling so brightly that he finds it difficult to look away. He hates to admit it, but he thinks he might have been wrong about her too.

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bloodyshadow737 · 7 days ago

Text

*Watching the unfinished fanfics in the draft section*

*turning around and running away to found goods fanfics to read*

#severus snape x reader #fanfic #remus lupin x reader #daryl dixon x reader #hellboy x reader #stu matcher x reader #billy x reader x stu #billy loomis x reader #billy hargrove x reader #steve harrington x reader #rick grimes x reader #eddie munson x reader #jonathan byers x reader #silco x reader #viktor x reader

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ms-snape · 3 months ago

Text

Believe in me (Young!severus snapexreader)

Request: not arequest, but requests are opened, I really need to precise that cause I didn't receive any

Summary: Severus is in love with a close friend to the marauders

Warning: marauder's bully

Word count: 1457

Masterlist

---

The Great Hall was alive with the raucous laughter and chatter of students. Long tables, laden with food, stretched beneath floating candles that flickered like stars against the enchanted ceiling. At the Gryffindor table, Y/N sat between Sirius Black and Remus Lupin, her laughter ringing clear as she recounted a story from their latest escapade.

“—and then James slipped right in front of Evans ! I thought he was going to fall right into the lake!” she exclaimed, her eyes sparkling with delight. Sirius nudged her, grinning.

“Yeah, but you should’ve seen his face! Priceless!” he howled, slapping the table with a loud thud.

Across the hall, Severus Snape sat alone at the Slytherin table, his dark eyes shadowed by his long, greasy hair. He watched Y/N with a mix of admiration and longing, his heart aching. She was everything he wasn’t—bright, lively, and surrounded by friends. The Marauders, her closest companions, were notorious for their pranks and teasing, and Severus was their favorite target.

“Hey, Snivellus!” James Potter’s voice boomed across the hall, drawing the attention of nearby Gryffindors. Y/N’s laughter faltered as she turned to see what was happening. “What’s it like being the biggest loser in school?”

“Leave him alone, James,” Y/N said, her voice firm. She leaned forward, her brows knitting together in defiance. “He hasn’t done anything to you.”

James scoffed, and Sirius chimed in, “Oh come on, Y/N! It’s just a bit of fun. Besides, he enjoys it.”

Severus scowled, his hands curling into fists. He wanted to vanish under the table, but Y/N’s presence anchored him. She always defended him, even when it seemed hopeless.

“Fun for you, maybe,” she shot back, her cheeks flushing. “But it’s cruel. You’re just bullying him because he’s a Slytherin.”

“Yeah, and he’s a total creep,” Peter Pettigrew sneered, snickering at the end of the table.

“Enough!” Y/N’s voice cut through the noise like a knife. The hall quieted, and all eyes turned to her. “Severus is my friend. He doesn’t deserve this.”

“Your friend?” Sirius echoed, raising an eyebrow. “You can’t be serious. He’s practically a Death Eater in training!”

Y/N’s breath caught in her throat at the accusation. “That’s not fair, and you know it! He’s not like that.”

“Then maybe he should stop acting like a weirdo,” James said, crossing his arms defiantly.

Severus felt the heat of shame wash over him. He wanted to defend himself, to yell back, but his voice was trapped in his throat. Instead, he turned away, focusing on the food in front of him, wishing he could disappear entirely.

Remus, who had been silent, finally spoke up. “Look, can we just drop it? Y/N is right. Severus hasn’t done anything to us. Can we not make someone feel terrible for no reason?”

Sirius rolled his eyes but shrugged. “Fine. Just thought we could use a little fun.”

Y/N shot Remus a grateful smile, and for a fleeting moment, Severus felt a flicker of hope. Maybe there was a chance for him, a chance to be more than just the outcast.

As the students resumed their chatter, Y/N caught Severus’s gaze. He looked away quickly, his heart racing. She was always kind to him, even when her friends were not. But the thought of her defending him only deepened his feelings, complicating everything.

After dinner, Y/N made her way toward the Slytherin common room, her heart pounding with each step. She couldn’t shake the feeling that she needed to talk to Severus, to understand him better. The Marauders had left her feeling unsettled, their casual cruelty gnawing at her conscience.

“Hey, Severus,” she called out softly as she approached him near a dimly lit corridor.

Severus looked up, surprised. “What do you want, Y/N?” His voice was a mix of curiosity and caution.

“I wanted to see if you were okay,” she said softly, stepping closer. “I’m sorry about how they treated you. They can be—”

“—insufferable?” Severus finished, his tone biting. “I know. But you don’t need to defend me. It won’t change anything.”

Y/N frowned, crossing her arms. “You deserve better than their bullying. You’re smarter than them, Severus. You know that.”

“Smart enough to be a target,” he muttered, his gaze dropping to the floor. “You don’t understand. They’ll never change. And neither will I.”

“Stop saying that!” Y/N exclaimed, frustration bubbling over. “You’re not a lost cause! You can be more than this.”

“What more can I be? A rejected Slytherin? The boy no one wants to be friends with?” he retorted, his voice rising. “You think I want to be in this position?”

Y/N took a step back, her heart aching at the pain in his voice. “I’m trying to help you. You don’t have to be alone, Severus.”

“Alone is all I’ve ever known,” he said, his voice cracking. “Why do you even care? You’re friends with them. You could be popular, happy—”

“I care because I see you!” she shouted, her cheeks flushed with emotion. “You’re not just some Slytherin. You’re smart, talented, and you’re my friend. I won’t let them treat you like this!”

Severus’s heart raced at her words, a mix of anger and something softer churning within him. “Y/N…”

Before he could finish, she took another step closer, her heart pounding. The world around them faded, and it was just the two of them in that narrow corridor. Without thinking, he leaned in, and their lips met in a tentative kiss.

It was electric—soft at first, then deepening as they both surrendered to the moment. Y/N’s hands found their way to his hair, pulling him closer, while Severus’s hands rested on her waist, as if he were afraid she might disappear.

When they finally pulled apart, breathless, Y/N searched his eyes. “See? You’re not alone.”

Severus’s expression softened, the walls he'd built around his heart beginning to crumble. “But they’ll never accept us,” he whispered, his voice barely above a murmur.

“Then we’ll show them they’re wrong,” she said fiercely, determination shining in her eyes. “I won’t let them bully you, and I won’t let you push me away either.”

Severus nodded slowly, feeling a warmth spread through him. “I don’t want to be alone anymore.”

“Then don’t be,” Y/N replied softly. “We can face them together.”

As the tension faded, a new understanding blossomed between them. They stood in silence, caught in a moment of shared vulnerability, a fragile connection that promised to grow stronger.

Days passed, and the dynamic between Y/N and the Marauders shifted as well. While Sirius and James were still quick to tease, they hesitated to attack Severus in front of her. It was a small victory, but it felt monumental to Y/N. Remus remained a quiet support, often stepping in to diffuse tensions when things got too heated.

One afternoon, as the sun cast golden light across the grounds, Y/N and Severus found a quiet spot by the lake. The water shimmered like glass, and the air was filled with the scent of blooming flowers.

“Do you ever wish things were different?” Y/N asked, her gaze fixed on the water.

“Every day,” Severus admitted, his voice heavy. “But I don’t know how to change.”

“You already have,” she said, turning to look at him. “You’re not just a Slytherin. You’re Severus Snape, and that’s enough.”

He met her gaze, searching for doubt but finding only sincerity. “What if they never accept me?”

“Then we’ll make our own path,” she said boldly. “We don’t need their approval.”

Severus’s heart swelled with emotion. “You make it sound so easy.”

“It’s not easy,” she admitted, her expression softening. “But it’s worth it.”

As they sat together, a comfortable silence enveloped them. The warm breeze rustled the leaves, and for the first time, Severus felt a sense of belonging—a feeling he had long thought impossible. He turned to Y/N, seeing her in a new light, not just as a friend but as someone who saw him for who he truly was.

“Thank you,” he said quietly, his voice filled with gratitude.

“For what?” she asked, tilting her head.

“For believing in me,” he replied, his heart racing. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Y/N smiled, and in that moment, everything seemed to fall into place. The weight of his insecurities began to lift, and for the first time, he dared to hope for a future where he wasn’t alone.

As the sun dipped lower in the sky, casting a warm glow over the lake, Severus took Y/N’s hand in his. It was a simple gesture, but it held a promise—of friendship, of understanding, and perhaps something more. They sat together, watching the sun sink below the horizon, feeling the world around them

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entitled-fangirl · 8 months ago

Text

The astronomy professor.

Severus Snape x Lupin!reader (past James Potter x reader)

Summary: it's Harry's third year, and the reader is beyond excited that her brother is becoming the boy's professor. When the two siblings goof off together before one of their classes, the reader realizes just how much she's grown attached to Snape.

Warnings: Death, grief, guilt, fighting, talks of threatening behavior, etc.

Author's note: I'm planning on working on the next piece of "His betrothed" soon! Also... maybe a Remus Lupin x reader???

Masterlist

....................................................................

Severus scowled at the other end of the professors table in the Great Hall, while next to him, Y/N smiled brightly.

They had both had quite different viewpoints of the newest DADA professor.

Remus Lupin.

Being a Lupin herself, she was beyond excited that her older brother was coming to teach.

And he was quite excited to be there as well.

The two were close during their time at Hogwarts. She was often seen flitting around the Marauders like a pesky gnat.

None of them ever thought of her as pesky though.

She was Remus' younger sister, and therefore, their own younger sister.

And throughout their time in school, she had developed a large crush on James Potter.

The only person who ever knew about it was Remus.

And while it absolutely killed her, she was happy when James and Lily started dating.

Then were engaged.

Then married.

Then had Harry.

That was just the kind of person Y/N was. Though it destroyed her, she couldn't help still feeling joyful for him.

Imagine her pain the day he died.

That's how she got to this point now.

So close to Severus Snape.

Because they both bonded together over one thing:

That James and Lily Potter could've had very different lives if they hadn't ended up with each other.

…

Remus approached Y/N after the dinner, grabbing her elbow gently from behind. She turned away from her conversation with Minerva to look at him, "Oh, Remus. What's wrong?"

He shakes his head, "Nothing. It's just… can I talk to you?"

Minerva intervenes, "Go on, you two. We'll finish this conversation later, Professor Lupin." She pauses, "Well, I guess now you're both Professor Lupin. Hmm."

She walks off.

Y/N turns around to him. "There's something wrong with you. Don't lie. We've been siblings for far too long to make you think you can lie to me."

He sighs and pulls her arm, dragging her out of the Great Hall.

Severus, with his ever watchful gaze, notices the urgency in which Remus drags her away.

He didn't miss the tall werewolf at all.

…

"He's just so tall, isn't he?" Remus asked joyfully.

She smiles, "Oh, yes. And Harry is so smart. That, or he's quite good at copying off of Ms. Granger. You'll figure it out when you get there."

"He looks just like James." Remus said with distant look in his eyes.

Y/N smiled at the thought, "Yes. But, he looks like Lily, too. Imagine if he had her red hair. He'd fit in with the Weasleys just fine!"

The two siblings laughed loudly in the middle of the deserted corridor.

It was if they were students again.

She looked back at him, "I really have missed you, Rem."

He sighed, "I'm sorry for my actions after… you know."

"Remus, I don't blame you for reacting to all of it the way you did-"

"-you really can, though. You should."

She stepped back, shaking her head, "No. I don't care what happened in the past."

"You're my sister and I pushed you away," he reminded her. "All because I was too weak."

She scoffed, "You're not weak. You've never been weak. Remus, don't-"

"-NO!" He pushed, "I pushed you away after he died because. every. single. time I looked at you after that, I saw him."

Her mouth opened slightly as she registered his words. She moved to speak, but couldn't trust her own voice.

He took a deep breath and pinched the bridge of his nose, "Look. I'm sorry. That's nothing of your concern, and I don't know why I bothered you with it."

"You… you really saw him in me?" She asked.

"I still do."

"What's going on down here?" Severus's voice boomed down the hall as he approached the two.

Remus resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

Y/N turned to look at him, "Just catching up. It's been far too long."

"And still not long enough," Severus said.

"Severus," she scolded.

Remus chuckled lightly, "Nice to see you, too, Snivelus."

"Remus," she scolded towards him now.

The two completely ignored her as they glared at each other.

She sighed, "Let's just pretend we all get along? Please."

Severus grumbled under her breath, but agreed.

Remus considered her question carefully, and finally nodded.

…

Now, Y/N sat on Severus's desk as he carefully brewed a potion on one of his standing desks.

"Are you happy to be here with your brother again?" He asked as small talk.

She nodded, "Yes. I missed his laugh most dreadfully."

He nodded, throwing another ingredient into the cauldron.

She grabbed a stack of papers on his desk, looking at each one carefully.

"What are you doing?" He asked.

"These are second-year essays, yes?"

"Yes."

She nodded, moving now to sit at his desk. She grabbed his quill and ink. "I'll grade these for you while we talk."

He quickly moved towards the desk, "No. I will grade them another time. Don't do my work for me. You do enough."

She looked up at him with a puzzled brow, "Why? You're busy with your potion. I thought it only fair…"

He stepped back in thought, "It would be a nuisance to you. You won't enjoy the content."

She laughed, "No one enjoys reading or writing essays about anything magical. Everyone would rather just see or do it."

"But that's how they learn." He counter argued.

She shook her head, "No, that's how you teach."

He tilts his head, "And what do you do for Astronomy, darling?"

She smiles, "They draw what they see. The constellations. Then sometimes, I make them come up with new names for each one. When they get older, they get to write stories for them. Come up with their own backstory for how it got in the sky."

He nodded, "But each constellation has its own story already."

"They do. And I tell them those. If people in history can choose what to believe about them, why can't my students? And trust me when I say I haven't had a single student fail the exam for it in four years."

Severus stirred the potion as he listened, "I just don't see how it's helpful, is all."

She shrugs, "As long as they learn, who cares?"

He smiles just barely, "I'll never understand how your little mind works."

She missed the way he almost ruined the potion due to his interest in their conversation.

…

"So, what's in your lesson plans for today, Professor Lupin?" Y/N asked excitedly.

"Well," Remus said, "Today, I figured the third years would get to face a boggart."

She gasped, "You got your hands on a boggart?"

He nodded, "Hagrid helped me, of course."

"How much longer until your class?"

He looked down at his watch, "Hmm, 40 minutes, I'd say."

She smirked, "Still think our fears are what they always were?"

He tilted his head back and forth, "I'd say so. I mean, we're older but… we're still who we used to be. It's worth a try." He smirked.

She practically skipped with excitement toward the bureau in his classroom. "Merlin, you're already better than the last DADA professor, Rem."

He furrowed his brow, "How so?"

"Well," she recalled, "I heard from a Weasley that he opened the cage of 15 Cornish pixies into the second year class. Caused a major disruption. And then… his personality, of course."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know about others, but, he would not let me alone. He asked me out almost every other day. It was so tiring. But then, one day, he just… quit bothering me."

Remus pondered her words, "What would make him quit?"

She shook her head, "I don't really know, Rem."

He huffed, "Well, I gotta know now. Think, dear sister."

Y/N looked up in thought, "It was after Christmas break. But… before the Chamber was opened. It doesn't matter, honestly. I much rather be goofing off before your class starts. C'mon."

Remus smiles and stands in front of the bureau with his wand, "Alright."

She opens the door slowly.

The boggart immediately shifts into the full moon.

Y/N sighs at the sight.

He was still scared of who he was when the full moon appeared.

"I suppose nothing has changed," he stated.

She nods.

She walks in front of her brother to face the boggart next.

It takes its time to shift, making her rethink her decision to do this.

It shifted to something much different.

Severus Snape's dead body.

Her face dropped quickly at the sight and her eyes widened.

She knew it wasn't real. She knew it wasn't real.

Why does it look so fucking real?

Remus looks over her shoulder with a gasp.

And neither of them move for a minute.

Finally, her voice breaks through the silence, "Rem?"

He nods, "Yeah. Yeah. I… I got it."

Remus steps in front of her, waving his wand and whisking the creature back into the bureau.

The door shuts and locks, but the siblings remain just as quiet.

As if spooked, Y/N bolts out of the classroom door.

She runs as quickly as her legs can carry her, almost running into sleepy students multiple times.

She throws the door open.

The door to Severus's classroom.

He stands up from his desk slightly startled by her sudden intrusion.

Her entire body relaxes as she sees him.

"Is everything alright?" He asked suspiciously.

She shakes her head, looking down at her feet in embarrassment.

Severus nods, walking up to her slowly. "I have twenty minutes before class. Why don't you come sit?"

When she doesn't move at all, he reaches forward and gently grabs her bicep.

At the contact, she suddenly wraps her arms around his neck and hugs him tightly.

He grunted in surprise, but made no move to get away from her.

In fact, he even wrapped his own arms around her.

"What has got you so worked up?"

She sighs into his chest, "I don't know. Everything just… clicked today."

"It what?"

"It all makes sense."

He leaned back just barely to see her face, "Such as?"

"You told Lockhart to let me alone last year, didn't you?"

He stiffened, "I… may have."

"Thank you."

"Don't. It was nothing."

She nods, pulling away from him, "I'm sorry for all this. I just… had… a moment earlier and… needed to make sure you were alright."

"Why wouldn't I be?"

She shrugs, "It seems that the people I like don't have a great track record of… staying alive, is all."

He tilts his head, "People you 'like'?"

Y/N blushes, "Um. People I enjoy the company of. You know."

"And you enjoy my company?" He asked in a teasing way.

"How could I not?" She finally regains her thoughts, "I should go before your class starts. Granger will be here any minute."

He nods, "Perhaps you may come by later to assist me with grading?"

She smiles, "Only if you let them draw pictures at some point."

Severus sighs, "Alright."

She bits her bottom lip to hold in her laugh. "Alright then. It's a date."

She begins to walk out.

"And Darling?" He asked.

She turned in the doorway to look at him, "Yes?"

"I didn't tell Lockhart to let you alone. I threatened him quite severely."

She tilted her head, "How?"

He shrugged, "Does it matter?"

She shakes her head with a light blush on her cheeks.

Oh, Remus will eat this up.

..............................................................

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mx-pastelwriting · 3 months ago

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Kinktober 2024 Masterlist

Hello! I am doing Kinktober this year; here is the month's menu. For every year I will make my own and it will be open for anyone to use for a list promps.

Minors do not interact!

1 ☆ 𝙎𝙩𝙪𝙘𝙠: 𝙎𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙪𝙨 𝙎𝙣𝙖𝙥𝙚

2 ☆ 𝘽𝙧𝙪𝙞𝙨𝙞𝙣𝙜: 𝘾𝙖𝙧𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙡𝙚 𝘾𝙪𝙡𝙡𝙚𝙣

3 ☆ 𝙐𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙬𝙖𝙩𝙚𝙧: 𝙂𝙖𝙣𝙜 𝙊𝙧𝙘𝙖/𝙆𝙪𝙜𝙤 𝙎𝙖𝙠𝙖𝙢𝙖𝙩𝙖

4 ☆ 𝙊𝙧𝙜𝙖𝙨𝙢 𝘿𝙚𝙣𝙞𝙖𝙡: 𝙉𝙚𝙜𝙖𝙣 𝙎𝙢𝙞𝙩𝙝

5 ☆ 𝙆𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜: 𝙀𝙙𝙙𝙞𝙚 𝘽𝙧𝙤𝙘𝙠 & 𝙑𝙚𝙣𝙤𝙢

6 ☆ 𝙒𝙚𝙩 𝘿𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙢: 𝙅𝙤𝙝𝙣 𝙋𝙧𝙞𝙘𝙚

7 ☆ 𝙋𝙝𝙤𝙣𝙚 𝙎𝙚𝙭: 𝙃𝙖𝙣𝙣𝙞𝙗𝙖𝙡 𝙇𝙚𝙘𝙩𝙚𝙧

8 ☆ 𝙃𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙘𝙪𝙛𝙛𝙨: 𝙎𝙤𝙣𝙣𝙮 𝘾𝙖𝙧𝙞𝙨𝙞

9 ☆ 𝙃𝙚𝙖𝙩: 𝙍𝙚𝙢𝙪𝙨 𝙇𝙪𝙥𝙞𝙣

10 ☆ 𝘿𝙧𝙮 𝙃𝙪𝙢𝙥𝙞𝙣𝙜: 𝙍𝙖𝙛𝙖𝙚𝙡 𝘽𝙖𝙧𝙗𝙖

11 ☆ 𝘽𝙡𝙤𝙬𝙟𝙤𝙗: 𝙈𝙖𝙧𝙘𝙪𝙨 𝙑𝙤𝙡𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙞

12 ☆ 𝘾𝙤𝙡𝙡𝙖𝙧/𝙇𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙝: 𝙇𝙪𝙘𝙞𝙪𝙨 𝙈𝙖𝙡𝙛𝙤𝙮

13 ☆ 𝘼𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣𝙨𝙩 𝙖 𝙬𝙖𝙡𝙡: 𝙅𝙖𝙨𝙤𝙣 𝙑𝙤𝙤𝙧𝙝𝙚𝙚𝙨

14 ☆ 𝙑𝙞𝙗𝙧𝙖𝙩𝙤𝙧: (𝙋𝙧𝙚-𝙒𝙖𝙧 & 𝙋𝙤𝙨𝙩-𝙒𝙖𝙧) 𝘾𝙤𝙤𝙥𝙚𝙧 𝙃𝙤𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙙 (𝙎𝙚𝙥𝙖𝙧𝙖𝙩𝙚)

15 ☆ 𝙏𝙝𝙧𝙤𝙣𝙚: 𝘾𝙖𝙞𝙪𝙨 𝙑𝙤𝙡𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙞

16 ☆ 𝙋𝙝𝙤𝙩𝙤: 𝙃𝙖𝙣𝙠 𝙋𝙖𝙡𝙢𝙚𝙧

17 ☆ 𝙉𝙪𝙙𝙚𝙨: 𝙇𝙚𝙚 𝙍𝙪𝙨𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙡

18 ☆ 𝘿𝙚𝙨𝙠: 𝙎𝙩𝙖𝙣𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙙 & 𝙎𝙩𝙖𝙣𝙡𝙚𝙮 (𝙎𝙚𝙥𝙖𝙧𝙖𝙩𝙚)

19 ☆ 𝘾𝙪𝙢 𝙋𝙡𝙖𝙮: 𝙏𝙤𝙣𝙮 𝙎𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙠

20 ☆ 𝙂𝙡𝙤𝙧𝙮 𝙃𝙤𝙡𝙚: 𝘼𝙧𝙩𝙝𝙪𝙧 𝙈𝙤𝙧𝙜𝙖𝙣

21 ☆ 𝙋𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙚: 𝙃𝙚𝙞𝙢𝙙𝙖𝙡𝙡

22 ☆ 𝘽𝙖𝙡𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙮: 𝙆𝙡𝙖𝙪𝙨 𝙈𝙞𝙠𝙖𝙚𝙡𝙨𝙤𝙣

23 ☆ 𝘿𝙧𝙮 𝙃𝙪𝙢𝙥𝙞𝙣𝙜: 𝘼𝙡𝙛𝙞𝙚 𝙎𝙤𝙡𝙤𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨

24 ☆ 𝙇𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣: 𝙀𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙖𝙫𝙤𝙧/𝙀𝙣𝙟𝙞 𝙏𝙤𝙙𝙤𝙧𝙤𝙠𝙞

25 ☆ 𝙍𝙪𝙞𝙣𝙚𝙙 𝙊𝙧𝙜𝙖𝙨𝙢: 𝙑𝙞𝙣𝙘𝙚𝙣𝙩 𝙍𝙚𝙣𝙯𝙞

26 ☆ 𝘽𝙚𝙜𝙜𝙞𝙣𝙜: 𝙂𝙝𝙤𝙨𝙩/𝙎𝙞𝙢𝙤𝙣 𝙍𝙞𝙡𝙚𝙮

27 ☆ 𝙌𝙪𝙞𝙚𝙩: 𝙅𝙖𝙫𝙞𝙚𝙧 𝙀𝙨𝙘𝙪𝙚𝙡𝙡𝙖

28 ☆ 𝙒𝙝𝙞𝙥𝙘𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙢: 𝘿𝙖𝙧𝙮𝙡 𝘿𝙞𝙭𝙤𝙣

29 ☆ 𝙇𝙖𝙥 𝘿𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚: 𝙃𝙖𝙣𝙠 𝘼𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙤𝙣

30 ☆ 𝙎𝙩𝙧𝙚𝙩𝙘𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜: 𝙋𝙧𝙤𝙛𝙚𝙨𝙨𝙤𝙧 𝙃𝙪𝙡𝙠

31 ☆ 𝙐𝙣𝙞𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙢: 𝘼𝙡𝙡 𝙋𝙖𝙥𝙖 𝙀𝙢𝙚𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙪𝙨 (𝙎𝙚𝙥𝙖𝙧𝙖𝙩𝙚)

Hello, I hope you enjoyed if there is any grammar mistakes or misspellings sorry about that feel free to let me know in the comments, have a great day/afternoon/night!

Fanfiction is protected under copyright law when plagiarism is involved. If you plagiarize my work, either a piece or whole in any language, I will take legal action. Inspiration or the same idea does NOT apply to this, only word-for-word plagiarism in any language.

♥ mx-pastelwriting does not consent to their fanfiction being copied, copied & credited, translated, used in videos and/or audios, screenshotted, used in AI, or reposted on any other platform without permission.

♥ mx-pastelwriting does give consent to "reblog," sharing links to direct work, and being in recommend lists.

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noelan1 · 6 months ago

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I can’t stand those Y/N’s who stay with a person even though that character did some fucked up things to them…. For example “ oh I know you have ran over my dog, killed my mom, told my dad to kill himself, strangled me, cheated on me multiple times for my mom before she died, and burned down my house but I can fix you 😊😊😊😊😊” LIKE LIL BRO NO… LEAVE THAT MOTHERFUCKER …

#aris x reader #gally x reader #lucius malfoy x reader #minho tmr x reader #newt x reader #pavitr prabhakar x reader #hobie x reader #luke castellan x reader #atsv fanfiction #harry potter fanfiction #tmr fanfic #cedric diggory x reader #weasley twins x reader #lucius malfoy x you #draco malfoy x reader #severus snape x reader #remus lupin x reader #sirius black x reader #slytherin boys x reader

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severussnapemylove · 9 months ago

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(in the Hogwarts staffroom)

Y/N; "What is love?"

Remus; "An emotional minefield….."

Severus; "A neurochemical scam."

Pomona; "..baby don’t hurt me?"

Y/N; "Thank you, Pomona!"

Y/N; "Severus, Remus, you both need therapy."

#incorrect quotes #reader insert #severus snape x reader #severus snape #remus lupin #pomona sprout #harry potter universe

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unconventional-lawnchair · 3 months ago

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We'll heal together: Chapter Seven

Not Strong Enough Boygenius

Sirius Black x Reader / Remus Lupin x Reader (Ambiguous-Past)

Masterlist

Summary: Remus confiscates the map and sees a name he never thought he'd ever see again/how Remus lost the reader

Cw: Use of {Y/N}, Mean Remus, Jealous/Jerk Sirius, Harry with hurt feelings, mentions of death, mentions of character death, cusses, mild sensual content (please reach out if I missed something}

Wc- 5963

If you were asked in school when was the first time you had the unfortunate pleasure of meeting the eldest Black brother, you probably would have told them your first year when you met with James to be sorted into your houses.

The Grand hall was magnificent, it looked as amazing as you had always guessed, with so many faces you had never seen before, and such a warm feeling that came with it. You looked around, eyes following the floating candles that cut down the middle aisle and tried to stop you before you could reach James.

You were bouncing on your heels, holding James’s arm, and swaying. Sirius didn't say anything to you, but he stared. Stared the whole time James introduced you to Peter and Remus, telling you the story of how they met, luggage mixed up after several of the suitcases on the platform had been knocked over.

You and Lily shared a look and amused snickers at that.

When James got to Sirius, you two shared a look but nothing else. There was a tension in the air, as you twisted your lips into a skilled and annoyed pout that James knew very well. Sirius just scoffed and looked away from you, stepping closer to James.

You gave a small huff, it felt like you were watching a dog lay claim on their favorite human. You grabbed James’ arm tighter and Sirius in turn wrapped his arm around his shoulder. You glared at Sirius while James stood there with a confused but content look.

“James Potter.” Professor McGonagall called to the front, and he wiggled himself out of your grasp, You and Sirius still remained tense. You looked up at James with a hopeful smile, and your jaw dropped as the hat announced ‘Gryffindor!’ and the kids adorn in red cheered.

You also cheered. Then when Lily was called, you gave her a thumbs up as she glanced at you. With your reassurance, she walked forward, nose upward and full of confidence. The hat hardly touched her head before it boomed out the same house. You lit up as Lily looked over to Snape. The boy slowly nodded, as she hurried off to the red table.

“Severus Snape!” She called forward and the boy climbed the steps. He sat down and his face twisted with determination, before the hat gave a scoff. “You can't just ask for a house, boy! There is more to it than that!”

Snape's face fell but his eyes remained closed.

“Slytherin!” The house called and you gave a worried look at how distressed that seemed to make him. You heard a pompous laugh beside you, turning to look at the gray eyes of Sirius Black.

“Don't be cruel.” You hissed at him and he simply stuck his tongue out at you. You gave a gasp and before you could retaliate, the assistant headmistress called you forward.

At the sound of your last name, a few students looked at you wide eyed. Ignoring the attention had become a useful skill you picked up on when you were younger. You walked up and sat on the stool. Closing your eyes tight, you listened. Praying for Gryffindor. The hat gave the best impression of rolling his eyes. “Hm.. A {L/N}, you have some legacy here. Brave, wise for such a young child. Loyal and ambitious.. Oh, very ambitious.” He muttered and you twisted your face. “You, small child, are an interesting one. Mind is nothing like your father’s years ago..”

You slowly peaked your eyes open, looking over at the red table and smiling as James and Lily met your gaze. By chance, you glanced over at the Slytherin table, eyes locking on Snape who seemed so awkward and out of place, People talking to him and he didn't respond, staring at Lily. You frowned and the hat seemed to notice something in you shift, before the rim curled and he bellowed. “Slytherin!”

Your face fell and your jaw unclenched in shock. Standing up you walked over to the Slytherin table, ignoring people as they tried to call out to you sitting by Snape. He snapped his head up as if he was about to snap at you, before he paused. You both held a look at each other before he huffed and laid his head on the desk. You were content with the silence.

You always told everyone that was the day you were cursed with the parasitic knowledge of Sirius Black. For the trained eye, however, like Lily Evan’s, you two clearly knew each other before that.

“So.” Lily mused as she laid in your bed, facing the canopy above her, and legs curled up. One thing you loved about being Prefects, was your dorms were not but a few yards away from each other. All it took was a silencing charm and James’s cloak to get you and the girls together.

Mary was on the floor facing your mirror, using the back end of your comb to line up her eyeliner while Marlene, her usual make up partner, was distracted.

Dorcus, your fellow Slytherin Prefect, was sitting on your bed by Lily, looking down at Marlene who was laying her head on her lap and biting her lip. Trying to flirt with the usually stoic girl. You raised your eyebrows in surprise when Dorcas actually smiled back. James is going to owe you so much money.

“So?” You asked, sitting on your desk and reordering your record collection Lily had slowly smuggled in for you over the years. As it was Lily’s gifts, it mostly consisted of ABBA and Queen, but all songs you adored.

“Well, I’ve been meaning to ask you, when did you meet Sirius?” Lily asked and your face twisted up in confusion. “What?”

“Don't ‘what’ me, there is clearly history there even before you met in the first year. There is so much hate in that boy's heart for you it's unrivaled. I sometimes wonder if James is the only thing keeping you away from meeting the other end of his wand.”

You gave a bitter laugh and rolled your eyes. “As a training Auror,” The girls collectively groaned and you giggled. “I could totally land him on his arse, thank you very much.”

“You're deflecting.” Mary sang from her seat on the floor and closed her makeup, turning to face you four. You bit your cheek as Marlene snickered. “And clearly there is something going on in that pretty head of yours.”

“I have to agree.” Dorcas called over and turned to face you, hands still on Marlene’s face. The glossy almost transparent lipstick stains all over Marlene’s face did NOT go unnoticed by you. You contemplated honesty, biting your cheek before you groaned.

“It's.. It's stupid, really. I know why he hates me, and it's not complete rubbish.” You sighed and set one of the records on to play with a wave of your wand. “He is just a child. Still thinks he's the only one suffering regardless of the situation. Narcissistic and cruel.”

The room was quiet for a moment before Lily gestured you over to your satin green sheets. You sat down and turned to look at her, as she squashed your cheeks together and Mary, feeling left out, hurried over to practically shove you across the bed. You guys fell down, head to head, looking up at the ceiling, and with another glance at Lily you caved. “Well, I may have met him one other time.”

“Where?” Mary prodded as she shifted to her stomach.

“At our engagement party?” You winced out as you cautiously looked at the girls who were all giving you serious looks of appalled shock.

“You're what!?” Lily finally shouted.

~~~

You couldn't have been more than five, maybe six, when you were told by your father that you were engaged. You were sitting in your room, having just finished your cleaning and making sure there were no blemishes to be seen. Your father and mother came in for their nightly overlook.

You stood in the center of the room, head held up, back straight, and your nose turned so you looked like a presentable young lady. Your hands clasped behind your back as your father walked around you and ran his finger along one of the tops of your bookshelf.

“We are going to the Blacks tomorrow, do you understand?” Your mother’s piercing bird-like voice filled the quiet dark room. “The house elf will dress you, but after your next birthday we expect you to be able to do it yourself. Understand?”

“Yes mother.” You mumbled. You hated the Blacks’, Mrs. Black was always so.. cruel. You couldn't imagine her home would be much better.

“What is the occasion, mother?” You asked in a faint voice.

Your father went to stand by her and began to lead her out. “Your engagement to Sirius Black, her oldest son.”

You had to fight to keep your expression even. Oh.

“You will be on your best behavior, understand?”

“Yes sir.”

As promised, mid afternoon next day, you were dressed in a complicated black dress, with frills and feathers to match the Black’s matriarch. You stood at the door, hands in front of you as you presented your full self, as your father always said. You had to fight back the tears as the door opened and it revealed a rather cruel looking house elf.

“{L/N}s, we welcome you to the noble house of Black.” He drew in a slimy way. You pouted and followed him in, your parents following close behind. Your father took off his coat as Kreacher took off your mothers, then yours.

The first thing you noticed when you entered the house was the smell. It was awful. It was a burning rotten stench, like when your father would come back from his meetings with the dark lord. You would speak more on it if you knew more than the hushed whispers between him and your mother. Everything around you was so dreary, so depressing. All black and dark colors, it made you feel smaller,

You were so wrapped up in your thoughts, you didn't notice as the Black family made themselves visible at the entrance of a rather large ballroom.

“Mr. and Mrs. {L/N}, how lovely to see you.” Mrs. Black called out to the three of you dripping in fake honey. Looking at your parents, your mother nudges you with her plastic smile, moving you both forward. “Mrs. Black, lovely to see you again.”

Their little interaction fell on deaf ears as you looked at the boys across from you. The taller one, who you assumed to be Sirius, was standing in front of a shorter boy, Regulus. The younger black was clinging to his brothers tailcoat and half behind him

Sirius was glaring at you, as much as a seven year old could glare. The look made you slowly lower your gaze down to your feet. What have you done? Only two minutes in and your future husband already seemed to hate your guts.

You winced as your father gave you a firm pat to the back of your head when he noticed your head down. You quickly raised it and looked towards the boys. Slowly, you offered your hand. “{Y-Y/N} {L/N}. It's a pleasure to meet you. You waited for Sirius to offer his hand in return, but it never happened,

Your father sent Walaburga a look, and she twisted her lip and smacked Sirius rather hard, and the boy hissed out in pain, rubbing the spot before he took and shook your hand.

That night was spent mostly clinging to your mothers leg as Sirius avoided you. Getting congratulations and proud looks from people you didn't know, and frankly, didn't want to know. Even Beatrix, Narcissa, and Andromeda Black came to congratulate you. Though, the eldest, Andromeda seemed more sympathetic than actually happy for you. The other two didn't have a truly readable look, but Narcissa kept her eye on you for the rest of the party.

When it was time to go, you were at the door waiting for a proper farewell from Sirius, but even at his mothers insistence, he refused to meet your eyes. You didn't really want this to work, you didn't want to marry someone as mean as Sirius. All you could think was that you wanted to see James and hide away at the Potters. They were the only truly comforting family you knew.

“He just kind of.. Hated me ever since. As a kid, I think I can see it. He has associated me with his family since that night. I don't know much about them, but I could make a few guesses.” You rattled on and sniffed, you didn't even notice you began to cry until Lily ran her thumbs across your cheeks. You puffed up your bottom lip and Lily gave a faint laugh at that.

“Why didn't you tell me?” She whispered and you shrugged, moving to sit up. “I don't plan to marry him, you know that. I just have to push it, avoid it until my seventeenth birthday and I have left Hogwarts.” You declared, self assured.

“I will have access to my vault then, and when I move it to my own account I can go back to the Ministry as an Auror, my own person.” You sat up straight as your eyes landed on one of the many books you had read about your hero, Alastor Moody. You scrambled to your feet, past the girls and their sympathetic looks. “I learned not to hold onto it. Sirius will thank me eventually.”

You pulled out a book and flipped a few pages, down to the ‘dedicated to’ page that had Moody’s signature. The only gift your father ever gave you that wasn't about his preset image of your future. The one thing he ever gifted you that showed you he knew who you were. Even if he seemed to hate it.

Dorcas and Marlene shared a look before Mary laid down flat against the bed with a huff. “I never figured Sirius for that kind of person.” She mumbled into a pillow.

“Really?” You, Lily, Marlene and Dorcas asked in shock, making you guys sputter out a laugh. Easily diffusing the tension of the room.

~~~

It had been a few days now, of you sneaking away from the Weasleys to go and watch Harry simply… live. It was the best feeling, watching him exist in the walls you once called home. It was nostalgic, gave you a bit of pride to watch him make choices you knew James never would, and acted with so much of his mothers patience and bleeding heart.

His friends, Merlin his friends, that Hermione girl behaved so much like Lily you caught yourself doing doubletakes whenever she would say something that sounded a bit too much like the red head. Ron, he was like a balancing act, shy like Peter, but his personality reminded you of his uncles. Particularly like Fabian.

You were quite fond of them, following them around almost everywhere you could. Eventually you cut the visits to every other day, you needed rest at some point. So, here you were, following after Harry with his two friends, listening to their complaints about a rat of some kind. The simple reminder of the animal had you huffing.

Apparently, you were a bit too loud. Harry, who was behind his friends, turned his head to look into the forest. He spotted you again, and you simply stared. This time, he smiled at you, and you gave a happy shrill. Your entire body wiggling, from your nose to the tip of your tail. He gave a laugh, and mumbled. “Hello again.”

“What was that?” Ron shouted from down the trail, and Harry only looked away for a moment, but when he looked back, you were gone. He frowned a bit before he hurried down the trail to catch up with his friends.

You followed them all the way down to the river, your ears rotating around as you watched them meet with Hagrid. You tilted your head, curious about the impromptu meeting. You remembered Hagrid vaguely, he was a charming man, but you didn’t have much time to spend with teachers casually. Like… well, a normal student. Hagrid was probably the only exception to this in your eyes. You admired the guy, but he was basically an overgrown child. Didn’t make him any less appealing.

You slipped past a few sticks and twigs to keep your volume to a minimum. That was, until you heard a few snaps behind you. You quickly turned to hide under a bush. You had run into too many wolves and other creatures who were looking to make a meal of you to take any chance.

Your thoughts were derailed when you saw it, however. A muggle dog, larger than average, black and matted, he looked like a stray riddled with mange. You lowered yourself closer to the earth, but then, something clicked. No… truly? That silky fur you knew from his constant pampering, his full coat and frame had been whittled away to nothing, but you knew him. You knew that mutt anywhere.

You took the chance. You ran from cover and bit down on his tail. He gave a yelp and whipped around with a snarl. You held his eyes, it felt like he was moments away from pouncing. You took a shaky breath before you turned sharply and dashed off deeper into the forest. It wasn't long before you heard his heavy footsteps behind you. You ran for a while, until you were positive no one else could see you. You jumped down into a miniature cliff that was once a rushing river that had run dry. The second you jumped down, you transformed back. You raised your wand to the dog before you.

Sirius, those eyes, they were his. He stared at you, and you returned the blank sentiment. He slowly shifted back and you saw him in all his tortured beauty.

He didn't look much better than he did as a dog. Hair patchy, you assumed from neglect, He did always have a hair pulling problem when you were younger, you couldn't imagine what that did for him in Azkaban. “{Y/N}...”

Your name sounded broken coming from his lips like that. He walked closer and you stepped back, He didn't relent, walking you straight against the dirt walls that encased you. He only stopped when your wand hit his chest. He looked from your wand, looking up your arm, and to your face. He gave an almost crazed smile. “Scared of me, pretty girl?”

His voice was haunting. It put a weight down your throat, even in this state he had an effect on you that you could never understand. Your hand began to shake, and he took your wrist, lowering it and stepping forward. His dirty hands took your head so gently. You both stared into eachothers eyes and he gave a crazed and desperate laugh. His grip on your cheeks growing harsher. The dirt that was on his palms and under his fingers stained your skin, “Sirius-”

“Again.”

“What?”

“My name, say it again.”

You stared at him. His voice was so strangled, likely from under use. He wet his lips and you took a shuttered breath.

“Sirius.”

He let out a sound that you were sure only a dog could make. Grinding his teeth, he dug his nails into your cheek and jaw as he forced you to look completely up. Into his eyes. “Where have you been, vixen?”

You raised your hand to grab his wrist in warning, but the crazed man seemed to have come to terms with it. “I have.. Quite the tale for you, Sirius.” You breathed, and he slowly nodded, Hands lowering to your sides and you bit your bottom lip. Looking away from him. Giving him the chance to lean into your ear to speak. “Better make it quick, Vix.”

You almost forgot how to breathe. Struggling to hang onto your anger. This man had gone after Peter alone, told no one, not even thinking about how he was abandoning your godson in the process. Your mind was suddenly fogging once more when his thumbs pushed hard against your waist and his nose found its way to your neck.

You pushed him back just a few inches, turning to face him again, “Let me start from the beginning.”

~~ Harry’s POV~~

He saw the name, he knows he did. Peter Pettigrew. He knew something was off, walking down the hall alone. The steps were getting closer, but the name tag had disappeared. He ran his thumb over the sheet as he stood still in the hall. There was a tense moment, where he was sure Peter was getting closer. He flinched at his own reflection.

He was going mad, looking at this old parchment. Surely, it was mistaken. He had gone on a wild goose chase this whole time. Oh great, now Snape is coming? “Mischief Managed, Nox”

As if he was just waiting for him to hide, a blinding light took over his peripherals.

“Potter.” Snape drawls, his lips curled up in a permanent scowl. “And what are you doing, wandering the corridors at night?”

“Uhm,” Harry stated and began to look around for any excuse he could muster. “Uh, sleep walking?”

He cursed himself as it came out as more of a question than a statement.

Snape scoffed. “You are so extraordinarily like your father, strutting around the castle.”

“My father didn't strut.” Harry snapped back and Snape narrowed his eyes at him. “And nor do I. Now, if you would be so kind as to lower your wand from my face.”

Snape lowered his wand and rolled his wrist. “Turn out your pockets.”

Harry sighed and pulled out the parchments and his wand. “Open it, now.”

He thumbed over the paper and unfolded the map. Snape lowered his wand to utter an incantation, before gesturing to the words. “Read it.”

“...” Harry sighed and lifted the page to his face. “Messrs Moony, Wormtail, Vulpes, Padfoot and Prongs offer their compliments to Professor Snape and..”

“Go on.” Snape insisted and Harry glanced up at him before sighing and looking back down.

“And request that he keeps his abnormally large nose out of other people's business.” Harry remarked as he snapped his eyes up to Snapes, looking him dead in his dark pupils.

“Why you insolent little-”

“Professor?” Lupin called down the hall, turning the nearest corner and narrowing in on the two.

Snape turned sharply and slowly smirked at the fellow professor. “Ah, Lupin. Taking a stroll out in the moonlight are we?”

Lupin resisted the urge to scoff, and looked around him. “Harry? Are you alright?” He called over in a gentle tone. Harry nodded but Snape snapped his hand forward and snatched the parchment from him before he could stop him.

“That remains to be seen. I have just now confiscated a rather curious artifact.” Snape remarked as he looked it over. Lupin felt his heart fall to his feet. He hadn't seen that map since Finch confiscated it, Lupin quickly recovered,as Snape handed it over.

“I believe this is your area of expertise.”

Lupin looked it over with a firm sigh, threw his nose, rolling his tongue to try and stifle a laugh at the words. “Looks to be a parchment designed to insult whoever reads it. Likely a Zonkos product. Severus, but.” He lifted the paper higher as Snape tried to grab it back. “I will look it over. As you said, it is my area of expertise. Now!”

Lupin turned on his heels and gestured to his side. “Harry, a word of you'd please?”

Harry nodded and quickly passed Snape, head down as if in shame.

Once they made it to the classroom, Harry followed Lupin to his desk. The professor was clearly upset, so Harry stayed quiet. He spoke calmly, but his tone was anything but, like he was holding himself back from rage he didn't recognize.

“Now I haven't the faintest idea how this map came to be in your possession, I would say I am shocked you didn't hand it in, if I didn't see James doing the same thing. I am, however, incredibly disappointed in this behavior. Did you stop to think of it? For a moment?” Lupin raised his voice steadily before he took a pause and a deep breath, turning to face Harry fully. “That if Sirius Black got his hands on this map, that this would lead straight to you?”

Harry’s eyebrows raised. It wasn't that he was unused to people's rage being directed at him, or their disappointment for that matter. But something about it being Remus looking at him like that, it broke a bit of his heart. He was just so used to Lupin’s warmth. “... No.” He admitted.

“No. Of course not.” Lupin hissed. “I understand the thrill of it all, I was a student in these halls once too, but it is time to stop looking at this like a game. You are in danger Harry. Danger that your father and your mother lost their lives trying to keep you from. Danger that the people dearest to me were killed and maimed to protect you from! And wondering about the castle with a killer on the loose seems to be a pretty poor way to repay them.”

The professor waved the paper around like it had done some horrible offense. He tossed it on his desk with a sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“I don't mean-” Harry tried to explain and Remus didn't want to hear it, raising his hand to tell him to be quiet.

“Didn't mean what? To sneak out? Endanger yourself and in turn, this school?”

“I didn't think it was-” He began in bewilderment and Lupin simply raised his voice.

“Do you know how many people were affected by this war? How many people were on the front lines to ensure your safety?”

“No..”

“Fabian Prewett, do you know that name?” Lupin walked up to a letter that rested on his desk. He flicked it open. Harry frowned, hard.

“No-”

“Molly Weasley’s older brother, dead. Do you know Gideon Prewett?”

“No, I-”

“Fabian's twin brother, he was splinched and lost his left arm, moved to America. Marlene McKinnon?” He prodded. Harry looked down at his shoes. “Dead, death eaters killed her entire family. Dorcus Meadows? Voldemort killed her himself after she snapped and went rogue, looking to avenge Marlene. Mary McDonnell?”

“No-”

“She was killed in her safe house days after your parents death. {Y/N} {L/N}?” His voice cracked at the name.

“Yes, that name I-”

“You don't have a clue about that woman! About your Godmother, because she was killed. Killed trying to protect you and saving lives. All of these people put themselves on the line. Not just for your parents, but for you. For the concept of what we believed was our family. Peter Pettigrew faced Sirius Black for you! And to you that means nothing but for a boy like Peter that meant the world.”

There was a thick and tense silence.”Do you know what that means? Family means we look after eachother. In order to do that, you have to look after yourself first.” He tutted as Harry sniffed and looked away. He hated to be this intense about it, but Harry needed to wake up at some point.

“I will not cover up for you again, Harry. Do you understand me?”

“Yes sir.” He whispered low and Remus huffed. “Go to your dormitory.”

Harry had never run quicker from Remus, before he paused and cleared his throat. “Professor?”

Lupin gave a deep sigh and slowly turned to look up at Harry. “Yes?”

“I think it may be broken. It's uhm.. It’s been showing me Peter Pettigrew.” He spoke carefully and Remus narrowed his eyes. Harry gave an awkward nod, muttering a good night before running off.

Remus was left alone with his thoughts, eyes wandering up to the window behind his desk. He thinned his lips as he let his mind wander next. Those names, Maybe it was the date that led him to be so hard, even close to the full moons he had learned to manage his temper for the most part. The date was getting closer and closer to when he made one of the stupidest mistakes he has made in his life.

~~~

The spring formal, in lue of the triwizard tournament in the winter. He remembered when Lily suggested it to the other prefects then to the professors. They hadn’t held the tournament in years, and the kids were close to their last years at Hogwarts.

He thought it was a cute idea at first, having been one of the many students Lily had referenced to get the whole thing reviewed by the professors. Then, he started getting those bloody questions. It started when you were all sitting together in the library, the boys, you, Lily, and Mary.

You were talking Mary threw the process of making liquid luck, when a hufflepuff boy walked up to the table. He cleared his throat and looked at you in a way that made Remus want to pull you closer. His lip twitched and the boy didn't even seem to see him there. You two always sat together, no matter where it was.

You sat up straighter and your knee pulled from his, he almost whined at the loss of your warmth. Merlin, he was a mess.

“{Y/N} {L/N}?” He called over to you and you looked up at him with your beautiful eyes. He saw the boy take a nervous breath and you sat there so patiently, eyes fluttering. “I was wondering, if you had a date yet? To the Formal, I mean.”

Your mouth shaped an ‘o’ and you gave him the sweetest look you could, avoiding pity or sympathy. “Sorry hun, you're very cute, but I am actually waiting on someone.” You remarked, Remus glanced at you to see you were already looking at him with this cheeky look. Didn't know if his blood was rushing to his face or leaving it, but he suddenly felt dizzy. You gave a giggle at his look before you turned back to Mary and got back to helping her. The curly haired girl was staring at you with a slack jaw. “Did you really just say that?” She whispered to you before Lily spoke up next. “Did you really just do that?”

He turned to face the boys and they were staring at him with wide and cheeky looks, all but Sirius who seemed annoyed by the whole thing.

“Well, he knows what I want.” You remarked and he just about fainted on the spot.

You damned Vixen.

That's how he got here, sitting in his dorm room with the boys, as they interrogated him.

“You're not going to ask her? The girl you've been mooning over for years says she wants you infront of everyone and you're not going to ask her?” James sounded like Remus had personally offended him.

“First of all, I resent that. Second, it's only been a year.” Remus muttered the last part, remembering the day he fell for you fondly. Waking up to your warmth after one of the worst nights of his life. You had found out about his condition months ago, he had been avoiding you. You always had a playful and flirty friendship. But when he woke up to you in the chair beside him, sound asleep. He thought he could see that for the rest of his life, and he fell even harder when you let out the most embarrassingly loud snore.

“You flirt with her all the time! What’s so unappealing about doing that for an entire night?” Peter, ever bold when it came to you challenged and Remus sighed.

“When the full moon is close, she can't possibly think I'm serious, and! it's hard to think the same of her when she flirts with Lily and Marlene all the same.”

“She does what now-” James sat up straight like a rocket and that made Sirius cackle.

“It's easier when it's not serious. But, a spring formal? That's like.. asking her to be my girlfriend!” Remus declared in offense and Sirius scoffed, looking over his book as Remus struggled.

“Do you not want that?” James asked and Sirius chuckled. “Must have realized how vile she truly is.”

“Watch it Sirius.” Remus huffed before he looked back at James and Peter. “Of bloody course I want that. I just can't have it.”

James gave him a confused look before he groaned. “This shit again-”

“I will ruin her life! She'll be an Auror the second we cross that lake after graduation! Then what will people think? It won't be cute anymore. A werewolf husband can't keep a job, and I can never have kids. That's the one thing she wants the most. A family.” He mumbled and James sighed. Sirius winced and sunk into his bed a bit more as Remus spoke about his betrothed without knowing it.

He was going to tell them, but you had never made it known if you wanted him to share it or not. Not that you willingly interacted with him after how he treated him. Then you started this fling with Reamus. He figured at first it was to make him jealous, and it worked. Though, the way you looked at him was chilling. He quickly realized he had gone too far, but there wasn't much he could do now. So he stayed quiet.

“Do you think maybe you would be enough for her?” Peter offered and James nodded along.

“I think knowing she settled for me would be worse.”

Remus Lupin, despite his best efforts to prove otherwise, was not stupid. He saw the way you looked at him, the tone you took with him and no one else. You were wild. fun, but responsible and respectful. You were the coolest witch he ever met, and when he first said that out loud Lily gushed like a schoolgirl. Well, as a school girl. He knew that the remark in the Library was true,

He wanted to know what loving you meant. The feel of your hand in his. He wanted to know what it was like being your number one, you already had a way of making people seem special, but to be special to you was something he wanted all to himself. He wanted you all to himself.

He couldn't have that, he couldn't do that to you. To anyone. So, he made a choice that would haunt him for the rest of his life. He would let you go, and let you down easily. Before it got too real.

Remus shoved away the memory as he sighed, pulling open the map and looking it over. “I solemnly swear I am up to no good.” He whispered to it, looking it over with a frown. He curled back the pages, looking over the forest and the names around. It was oddly stimulating, watching the prefects doing their rounds and the occasional professor here and there.

His eyes wandered all over the map, looking to see if Harry was being truthful about it having Peter’s name. He didn't see it, but his nearly dropped the map when he saw his name. Sirius Black.

And he wasn't alone.

163 notes · View notes

justagirlwholikesadam · 2 months ago

Text

This Feeling Will Pass

Severus Snape x Fem! Reader

Summary: About to go on a date with Remus turns into disaster but you find comfort in someone else.

Warning: Remus makes a mistake, kisses, self-doubts, muggle literature, Lily tries her best, reader cries a lot, prank.

A/n: This had been fermenting in my google docs, decided to finish it once and for all. Hope you like it! -L

Word Count: 6.4K

You had feelings for him before Lily introduced you to him. You saw Remus around in the library before, it was his favorite place, he told you. You liked him because he was kind hearted and a gentleman. Opening doors for you, reaching the book for you on the top shelves. Bringing your chair out for you to sit. Studying with him was mostly the only time both of you spent with each other. Some days were quiet while other days the study session of 1 hour became 5 hours. Lily or James would come and find you guys still talking. Lily joked with you when walking back to the girls dormitory.

“I never seen Remus look like that before.”

“What do you mean?” You asked Lily.

“He looks at you with so much love.” Her response makes you laugh in disbelief.

You remember that day, Lily had frowned and told you she knew Remus likes you back but he never gave you any hints that he might have feelings for you. You know that was for a fact when he started to date some girl from House Hufflepuff. You honestly thought it was your last day on earth, he came walking hand to hand with the girl in the great hall. You ignored the look on Lily’s face, you felt like you couldn’t breathe when he introduced her to you. The Hufflepuff didn’t last long and so didn’t the second girl in House Ravenclaw. By then you were better at hiding your feelings for Remus from Lily.

Anthony Setman from Ravenclaw had asked you on a date in your 5th year. Cute, dark haired Anthony had asked you during breakfast just a week before students were allowed to go to Hogsmeade. Lily told you that Remus stared draggers at him when asking you out. You ignored Lily when she brought him up. You didn’t want to think of Remus of a time like this. Someone had asked you out, a boy who likes you.

Remus was waiting for you in the common room when you came back from the date. You never saw Remus so nervous, he had grabbed your hand and pulled you to sit on the couch facing the fireplace. His eyes narrowed when he asked you about your date. You told him the truth, cute and dark haired Anthony was a bit of a let down. He spent the entire time talking about quidditch.

‘What a twat.’ Remus told you, making you agree.

“Yeah, he was but at least I got a free butterbeer.” You told Remus not noticing he got closer to you.

“I feel like an idiot for not saying it sooner, love. Seeing you with him.” Remus then confessed to you how he liked you. He was too nervous and decided to not do anything in fear of ruining his friendship with you.

“I don’t want to lose you.” Remus said.

“You won’t.” You told him before kissing his cheek.

You had James and Sirius to thank for, they were the ones who spoke to Remus about admitting his feelings to you. They had enough when all of Remus’ relationships ended because of you. You were the reason, the girls were jealous of you. They would ask Remus how come he doesn’t look at them the way he looked at you. You believed it truly at first. You believed James, Sirius and Lily. Remus had told you that next week it would be a date. He had planned it all out, he said as the days passed. On the day of the date, Lily and the girls helped you get dressed and did your makeup. You waited in the common room for him. You waited and waited until you saw James and Sirius along with Peter walking in laughing as they held a book from Zonko's Joke Shop.

“Oi! You look gorgeous.” Sirius said with a smile when he saw you sitting.

“The date went well?!” James asked, then looked around.

“Where’s Moony?” Your face fell, they didn’t know where Remus was. You told them and their smile disappeared.

Using the map, your heart fell when you saw Remus in the library with no other than Shelley Mumps. You quickly ran out of the common room. Remus was probably studying with her. Giving notes or tutoring the blonde Gryffindor, Sirius was hot on your trial. James looked nervous. It was the first time you saw him look like that. Cool and confident Sirius Black was looking under the weather when he tried to block the door of the library and you knew something was up. Peter was long gone, he ran away when he got a harsh look from Sirius and James when he told you to use the map to locate Remus.

Pushing Sirius out of the way, you walked inside, looking at the tables. The library was empty since Hogsmeade was open, you walked to the back. Finding the usual table Remus and you study on, you come to a halt when you see him. James calls your name when he walks from behind. His eyes widen to find his friend sitting on a chair with Shelley sitting on Remus’ lap while kissing him. A curse from Sirius drew them apart and Remus saw you staring at him with tears.

“Wai-Sto-It’s no-.” Remus shouts were ignored as you ran away.

Remus knew he was a horrible person. Having a crush on you and Shelley especially when he asked you on a date. He was confused, James and Sirius told him to make up his mind about it. He had a crush on the blonde since he first came to Hogwarts. Shelley who only talked to him when she needed the answers to the Charms homework. Shelley would wink at him when she needed to pass him to reach Sirius who barely gave her the time of day because he was looking at Marlene Price. As the date was coming closer, Remus chose you. He decided Shelley wouldn’t even give him the time of day. Unlike you, Remus liked how you spoke to him. You asked him about his day and how his classes went. You didn’t mind the scars on his face at all, you had even gone far to apply sunscreen on his face when the weather was hot.

Lily hinted at him about your feelings for him and he was happy about it, ecstatic because a girl like you liked him but deep inside he couldn't believe it. Self doubt leaked into his mind. He got an earful from Lily after he introduced the Hufflepuff. She didn’t understand.

‘Someone like her doesn’t need someone like me. Look at me, Lily. How can she really like me with this face? Someone poor?”

“You’re so thick sometimes.” Lily told him before slamming the door behind her.

His relationship didn’t last very long, none of them were like you. He wasn’t interested in them like he was with you. He would come to you when he got excited about something, showing you the newest book in the library. Buying you Hogsmeade sweet when he should be buying it for his girlfriend. The last girl called it quits when she found Remus staring at you when walking into class. You came walking side by side with Mary laughing with her as both of you sat down. Remus smiled at you when you waved at him.

He felt the green monster of jealousy form in the pit of his stomach when saw Anthony walking towards you. The quidditch player gave you a big smile and greeted you. Remus saw your cheeks blush when Anthony complimented your hair. He bit the inside of his cheek when you accepted Anthony’s invitation to go to Hogsmeade. He decided to wait for you to tell you he likes you. Then he wanted to take you on a date after learning about the failed one with Anthony. Sweet kisses were shared between the both of you. Remus walked with you to your classes the next morning. James, Sirius and Peter teased him about it but he didn’t mind. Seeing your smile was everything to him.

A few hours before the date, he decided to catch up on some homework so he would have more time with you. Finishing his essay, he was surprised when he saw Shelley in the library. She walked towards him and asked him the most obvious question: what was he doing? He looked down at the open books in front of him then looked up at her. He was doing homework. Shelley was getting too close and it didn’t set well with him. He blushed when she openly told him how attractive she thought he was. He grew even more red when she sat on his lap, her arm wrapped around his shoulders. She pulled on his tie and told him to relax.

“I need to go-.” She shook her head. “Go where, silly?”

“Have you thought about kissing me, Remus?” Shelley asked him as she leaned close to his face.

“I think about it.” She tells him. Remus couldn’t believe Shelley Mumps was sitting on his lap telling him how she thought about kissing him. She had the top buttons of her shirt undone and her tie was nowhere to be found.

“Can I kiss you?” She asked him, running her fingers through his hair. Remus just nods. They continued on with their kisses and he lost track of time, he gets excited and mistakenly mumbles your name against Shelley’s lips. She doesn’t even hear it, too busy looking behind him at the group of people who covered their mouths, trying to keep their laughter at bay.

Remus hears footsteps and Sirius’ voice, he pulls away and sees you. The look of betrayal on your face makes him come back to reality and dread seeps inside of him, filling him up. James and Sirius give him a look as he pushes Shelley off his lap.

“I don’t understand, mate. I thought you liked her? You picked her!” Sirius asked him after they went back to their rooms. James and Peter look over at Remus who covers his face as he sits on the edge of his bed.

“I know. I like her.” Remus said.

“Then why you fucking kissed SHELLEY?!” James snaps at him.

You ran and ran until you couldn’t breathe anymore. Tears ran down your face as you kept seeing Shelley on Remus, she was making out with him. Her arms around him, his hands on her hips. He ditched you to kiss Shelley. You felt like an idiot for believing your friends, Remus didn’t like you at all.

You ran into the Forbidden Forest and held yourself against a tree. You dropped down on your knees as you began to cough. Not realizing someone was walking towards you. You were crying as they got closer to you. You couldn’t hear them from the sobbing. Wallowing in your pain, you jumped up when you felt someone touch your shoulder. Looking over your shoulder you saw Severus Snape. He stood up straight and asked if you were alright. You knitted your brows in confusion by his question.

Severus Snape never spoke to you before, being from a different house. You didn’t have a need to speak with him. He was in some of your classes but stayed in the back. You sniffed and he handed you a handkerchief from his pocket.

“Thanks.” You said softly, grabbing it from his grasp. He gives you a nod before looking away from you. You noticed the large leather book in his other hand. Lily told you a bit about her ex friend, Severus. Told you how he was the one to tell her she was a witch. She loved him like a brother, she was his only friend. Since she was sorted into a different house, it made it more difficult to still speak with him, especially when James started to bully him. The bullying grew to the point where he lashed at her calling her a mudblood. She told you she didn’t hold any bad blood against him, but she just simply didn’t want anything to do with him after that.

“I’m sorry if I bothered you.” You told him. Severus frowned at your apology, he wondered why you were sorry.

“You didn’t.” He said watching you wipe your tears. Your mascara was smudged under your eyes, he wanted to laugh at the sight of you. He was reading when he heard you. You had completely passed him, he was sitting against a tree when he saw you. He started using the Forbidden Forest as his hangout. No one came here, he was never disturbed until now.

Severus knew who you were. Seen you around and during class. You walked with Lily most of the time, you were always with Remus. He never saw you cry before, you were always smiling and brightened the room with it. He didn’t like how the fat tears were rolling down your pretty face. That’s why he followed you, followed you until you slumped against a tree. You were wearing muggle clothes and he saw how your hair was changed up. You were planning on going somewhere, probably to Hogsmeade. He heard about Anthony asking you. He rolled his eyes at the meathead who was speaking loudly about asking you out. Last thing he heard was Anthony getting annoyed when you rejected him for a second date. He called you a tease for not even kissing him on the first date.

Severus wondered if Anthony had said something to you. The grasp on his book tightened at the thought of it.

‘Fucking asshole.’ Severus curses to himself.

“Was it Anthony?” He asked you, his dark brows rose up when you shook your head.

“It -.” You let out a deep breath and shook your head once more.

“I’m sorry, Severus. I don’t want to bother you with my problems.” You said pushing yourself up. You were about to give him back his handkerchief when you stopped yourself from giving it to him. Severus wouldn’t want a handkerchief covered with snot and tears.

“Don’t be sorry.” Severus said, you were the first person to apologize to him and the first to do it for a second time.

“Did he hurt you?” He asked. You shook your head, “It’s dumb.”

“If it’s dumb you wouldn’t be crying.” He said. When you don't respond, he gives you a nod. He wasn’t surprised, why would you tell him your problems? This is the first time both of you are speaking to each other. He knew since you're friends with Lily, you wouldn’t want anything to do with him.

Severus walks back to his spot a few feet away. He makes himself comfortable and opens his book. He hears footsteps coming closer to him after a few minutes.

“Are you usually here at this time?” You asked him and he looks up from his book.

“Everyday.” He answers sharply. “Can I join you tomorrow, please?”

He wants to say no because this is his spot. His spot to be away from everyone. A spot where he isn’t bullied or made fun of because of his features. But you had asked him so nicely, you spoke to him like a person. He can’t recall the last time someone said please to him.

“Sure.” He said, he looked away from you when you smiled at him. He doesn’t understand why his stomach flips at the sight of you smiling at him.

“Thanks. I’ll see you tomorrow. Bye.” He doesn't say anything back to you but he watches you leave. He doesn’t look away until you disappear from his sight.

He doesn’t think you would show up after dinner the next day. He’s already sitting down and halfway through his book when he hears you. You greet him and he brings the book down from his face. He can tell you were crying, you had a smaller book in your hand.

He nods at your welcome and watches you sit across from him, leaning against the other tree. You give him a smile before opening your book. Severus can’t concentrate; he's been reading the same sentence three times now. With the book in front of his face, he peeks over at you. You are in uniform, you had a leg over the other as you read your book. Severus has never seen it before, he thinks it might be a muggle book.

The books he reads are only in the library. He never had enough money for books back home. His father had told him it’s a waste of money. The title caught his interest.

Sense and Sensibility

“What book is that?” He asked you after a few minutes of silence. Your eyes came up and you gave him a small smile. You can see Severus’ face light up as you tell him about the author and the genre. He didn’t even notice you getting up and walking towards him handing him the book. Severus grabbed it with caution as he looked at the cover and flips the pages.

“You don’t read muggle books?” You asked him. He shook his head, his long locks of hair is covering his face.

“A muggle book in House Slytherin is a no go.” Severus told you. He knew Mulciber would tease him until no end if he ever saw these types of books on him.

“You can borrow it, read it here and I’ll take it back. Tomorrow I’ll bring it again in case you don’t finish.” Severus thinks about it for a minute, his eyes look up from the book at you.

“Why?” He asked and it caught you off guard. What does he mean by that?

“Not su-“ “Why are you being so nice to me?” He questioned.

“You’re Lily’s friend. You should hate me. You should bully me like those idiots Black and Potter.” You shook your head at him.

“I don’t want to bully you and I am her friend but she never once told me to stay away from you. She also doesn’t have a saying who I can be friends with.” Severus’ dark eyes stared at you, looking for any glimmer in your eyes saying that you were lying but he found none. You were being sincere. He realize you said friends. Since when did you become friends with him? He asks himself.

“What about Lupin? What happened to him? He usually follows you everywhere. Always staring at you when you aren’t looking.” You look down at the ground.

When you didn’t respond Severus sighs before shutting your book. “Look, I’m not going to stay here. Whatever is going on, I’m not looking for those imbeciles to come looking for you and find me. I had enough of those idiots.”

Severus was about to stand up when he saw you were crying. He rolled his eyes and immediately felt bad. He wasn’t trying to hurt your feelings, he didn’t want to be bullied again for being near you. Severus wasn’t stupid, he knew Lupin liked you. Severus was surprised when word got around that Remus was dating some other girl.

Severus watched as you grabbed his handkerchief for your pocket to wipe your tears. You kept it. He thinks to himself. He was sure you would have thrown it out by now since it came from him. Severus calls out your name softly.

“Tell me? What happened?”

Severus frowned heavily while you told him about it. His lips became a thin line as you spoke about Remus and Shelley.

“Sirius was nice enough to tell me what happened. He found me crying in the hallway. He said it wasn’t right what Remus did. Called him an idiot. Remus had a crush on Shelley for the longest. He started to like me too. James and Sirius told him to pick one and they thought he picked me but at the end Remus picked her. He was making out with her in the library.”

“I’m so stupid. I actually believe that he liked me. How can I ever compare myself to her?” Severus shakes his head.

“Don’t compare yourself to her, believe me. That airhead doesn’t know the difference between left and right.” You look over at Severus. “Had her as a partner in potion. She is so irritating and lazy.”

After a while Severus looks over at you and tucks his hair behind his ear. “You’re so much better than her.”

“Thank you, Severus.” You said, Severus tensed up when you walked next to him. Sitting down on the ground and patting the ground next to you. He sat down.

“We can read it together. If we aren’t done, I’ll bring it tomorrow.” Severus sits down beside you and opens the book.

“Maybe you can read it out loud.” Severus doesn’t answer you, he goes to the front page and clears his throat before beginning to read out loud.

Your eyes lifted from the page onto Severus’ fingers. They were long and thin, the book looked so small in his hands. You can see a few light scars on his knuckles and fingers. You knew it had to be from all of the potion making. Severus was well known for it, spending hours in the potion room in the dungeon. His skin was so fair, he was in dire need of suntan. You remember Lily told you that Severus never really goes out. You tried your hardest to remember everything she told you about him. Looking at his head, his hair covered his face, the tip of his nose peeked out and you desperately wanted to see his face up close. As you think about it now you don’t think you ever saw Severus’ face, his hair always covered his face and he always looked down at the ground when walking. Plus he was so tall, some people had to look up just to see his face.

You looked at the book, when he flipped the page. Clearing his throat once more, he read out loud again and you were hypnotized by his voice. The tone of his voice was deeper and he said every syllable in every word with such smooth. You didn’t think it was possible but his voice put you at ease and for the first time in those two days you stop thinking about Remus Lupin.

Meeting with Severus in the forest became a daily thing. After dinner, you will walk to the forest after rejecting Lily's plea to come and sit beside her with James. You didn’t want to see them yet. You didn’t want to see Remus, who was obviously waiting for you to come and sit down so he could speak to you.

“I have homework, Lils.” You kept giving her the same answer that you had homework and left the dinner table quickly. Going to meet Severus to read was the highlight of your day. He didn’t treat you any different like the rest. He didn’t even ask you about it. He always waited for you to say something about it first. He never pushed you for any answers.

A week has passed and your daily visit with Severus was still happening. You had avoided Remus for the most part. On Saturday you didn’t see him and was thanking Merlin, you can have breakfast in peace. You sat down eating your breakfast when Lily came rushing it.

She came running to you, sitting down next to you.

“You won't believe what happened with Shelley and Remus?!” You gave her a look of displeasure.

You don’t even want to know.

“That bitch and a group of Ravenclaw placed a bet on her to kiss Remus. She was laughing about it in the common room.” You felt your stomach turned inside out.

“Remus?” Lily took a deep breath before telling you that he was there, listening with James and Sirius. He ran up to his room and refused to leave.

“That’s terrible, Lily.” You said before turning back to continue eating.

“Don't you get it?” Lily asked, pulling your arm to face her again.

“That kiss meant nothing. Remus likes you and he misses you.” Lily stopped talking when she saw your face of disbelief.

“Remus doesn’t like me, Lily. Even if Shelley did kiss him for a bet he said yes, he kissed her back, and I know because I had to watch them make out. They were making out while I was waiting for him to go on our date. A date that he missed because he was making out with her.”

“ I want nothing to do with him.” Lily remained quiet but still sat beside you.

“I’m sorry.” She apologized to you. “I just wanted both of my best friends to get together.”

“I know.” You told her as you handed her a piece of toast.

Severus listened to you as you told him about what Lily had said. He watched you pace around as he sat down on the ground. He looked so angry when Lily told you to get Remus back. His eyes widened when you told him that you refused too. Remus had made his choice and so have you. As much as you liked him, you had respect for yourself, you would not go back to him. As much as you wanted to kiss him and be his girlfriend you couldn’t because all you can see him ditching you for her.

“I’m glad. Truly am. You deserve better.” Severus told you when you sat beside him to continue reading.

“You know Severus, I know I’m always telling you about my problems, but you know you can tell me about yours. I don’t mind, it’s the least I can do for you having to listen to me rant on and on about Remus.” Severus was touched by your words.

You were always there to remind him that he wasn’t alone. He hasn’t felt this alone this week since you started meeting him in the forest. It was nice to have someone next to him. It was nice to feel your warmth near him. It was nice to share a common interest with someone.

“I’ll keep that in mind.” He told you, making you smile as you looked down at the book. Both of you finished the book on the second day, Severus and you were unaware of the time as both of you spoke about the book. He liked the character Colonel Brandon from the start.

“I'm glad he got his happy ending.” Severus said softly looking down at the cover of the book.

“Yeah, after everything he did. He deserved to have it.” You agreed with Severus.

“Do you think happy endings happen in real life?” Severus asked without a single thought and you raised a brow at him. His eyes remained on the cover of the book.

“Absolutely.” Severus looks over at you and you see his face up close for the first time. You were surprised by it. James and Sirius had told you Severus was ugly with a big hook nose. His pale face was unblemished and his thin lips were a pale pink. His dark lashes surrounded his dark eyes. His nose was large but it made his face unique. As you leaned closer to him, he smelled like smokes of potion and cigarettes. You didn't know he smoked.

“If you say so then I believe it.” Severus said, looking towards you.

“If you like this then next should be Jane Eyre.” Severus looks away. “You still want to hang out with me?”

You nod at him. “Of course. I like it. To be honest, I feel more relaxed when I’m with you, just sitting here and reading.”

“Me too.” Severus said. Days passed and you met up with Severus after dinner. Sometimes you would bring your homework and do it while he read out loud. You told him he should do voice acting and Severus just shakes his head.

“You’re the only person who likes this voice.” He told you looking up from the book. You sat cross-legged with a book in your lap. His eyes darted away when he saw your bare knees, the skirt rose up to your thigh showing your skin.

The next day Severus brought a blanket with him. You smiled at him as he placed it on the ground, telling you so you won’t have dirt and grass stained on your skirt. The next day he was waiting for you on the blanket when you brought a small basket with you.

“So you don’t get thirsty when reading.” You told him while taking out a bottle of water from the basket.

During the day Severus was surprised when you greeted him in the hallways, he honestly thought you would pretend that you didn’t know him. Avery was shocked when you waved your hand at him and Severus did the same as you passed by him. Severus had his so-called friends on him the entire day, asking him if he knew you. He didn’t say a word, he wasn’t going to let them ruin the only good thing he had going on.

Severus didn’t want to ruin what he had with you. Reading after dinner was the best part of his day, he noticed how Remus would try to talk to you. Lily being with James, she wanted to talk to you but you always seemed to be with Mary and another girl. When he finished Jane Eyre, you told him about getting another book. He was finishing up dinner when he didn’t notice you walking towards him.

“Hey!” Severus looks up to see you standing in front of him. You grab your bag from your shoulder and he’s so busy looking at you that he doesn’t notice James and Sirius staring at him. Remus just stares in disbelief.

“I have The Great Gatsby and Frankenstein!” You bring the books up to his face and there’s a smile that appears on his pale face.

He excitedly takes them from your grasp and looks down at the cover. Remus tries to ignore the smile you give Severus as he picks one of them.

“I have seen a glimpse of a cartoon about this.” Severus says, showing you the Frankenstein book.

“On your TV?” You asked and he shakes his head.

“In my neighborhood, the tv shop mostly.” You nod at him and can’t help wondering if he ever watches tv. You believe he should since he's half blood. You wanted to ask more about him.

“I was thinking maybe we can walk together to the forest.” Severus nods and grabs his own bag walking next to you.

“What the fuck is going on?” James asked the table as they watched you walking side by side with Severus out of the great hall.

“Have you spoken to her?” Lily asked Remus. He shakes his head looking down at his plate.

====

"I wanted to show you something. I found it when I was looking for ingredients.” Severus said as you guys walked to the normal spot a few feet deep into the forest.

“Really?” Severus smiles at you as he keeps walking into the forest.

“Aren't there like flesh-eating monsters?” Severus laughs loudly at your question.

“Monsters yes, but not flesh-eating monsters.” You come to a halt and Severus turns around.

“There are spiders!” Your mouth dropped and he laughed before walking closer to you.

“Don't worry. You’ll be safe.” You look at him only for Severus to look away from you. His pale cheeks flared up in pink whenever you looked at him straight in the eyes. You did it so often, he still hasn't gotten used to it.

“Okay.” You said, grabbing a hold of his hand. Severus tensed up but didn't pull away. He starts walking, pulling you with him. A few minutes walking further in, Severus took you to a cave. Your ears perked up when you heard a waterfall. Looking at Severus with wide eyes, he nods at you.

“Is that even possible? A waterfall in the middle of a forest.” Severus smiles at your reaction.

“Come in.” He pulls you inside, he pulls you down to crawl into a tunnel. The sound of the water grew louder.

“Careful.” The only source of light was up high, the light showed the 10 feet waterfall. Severus pulls his wand out and without a word, he waves it in front of him. Your eyes widen as the candles around the cave lit one by one.

“Sev! This is amazing!” Severus watches as you walked closer to the waterfall. Looking down, you noticed the dirt was becoming sand when getting closer to the water.

“This is impossible!” You told him as you dropped your bag on the ground and walked closer to him.

“How can this be?” Severus shrugs his lean shoulders at your question.

“Magic.” He said, making you chuckle as you walked back to the water. He saw how you removed your shoes and socks, dipping your toes in the water.

“Should be alright to swim in it, right?” You asked him, looking over your shoulder at him.

===

Remus sat up from the couch when he heard the door open of the common room. His eyes widen at the sight of you. Your hair was damp, you carried your bag and sweater over your arm.

“Hey.” Remus said standing up from his seat. He couldn't help but feel down when he saw the smile on your face disappear when you saw him.

“Hi.” You answered him. “Where have you been?” He asked.

“Out.” Remus nods before sighing. “I’m sorry. I know you must hate me. I just want you to know how truly sorry I am.”

“Are you sorry because you found out it was a bet?” You asked him and Remus frowns.

“No! She was on me and grinding on me. She was on top of me and she asked me if I wanted to kiss her while her arms were on me.” Remus began to rant as he got closer to you.

“Remus.” You called his name and shook your head. “I’m sorry for ignoring you.” Remus felt hope in his chest.

“We were never together. I shouldn’t have gotten mad because we were nothing.” Remus frowns at you and shakes his head.

“It was something to me. You meant something to me.” He shouts your name. Tears well up in your eyes and you sighed.

"If it meant something then why did you say yes to kiss her.”

“It was a mistake.” Remus exclaimed. “I forgive you.” He smiles at your response.

“Let me take you out on a date. A date you deserve.” Remus said holding your hands but you shook your head.

“No. I don’t want to date you.” His hands drop down.

He looks at you with a sigh. “Because of him right?”

You look at him with a curious look. “Severus. The guys don’t know but I know. I didn’t know where you were going after dinner. I saw you on the map with him disappearing in the forbidden forest.”

“Who else knows?” You asked him and Remus answers you with no one.

“Do you like him?” His question made you freeze as you remembered Severus' lips on you.

You had begged him to join you in the water. You have gotten far to turn around so he can get undressed. When you turned around, he stood behind you shirtless. The sound of him whining when you pushed yourself against him filled your entire body. Your ears rang with the sound of your name coming out of his mouth when you cupped his face with your hands.

Remus bites the inside of his cheek when you nod at him. His eyes fill up with tears, at the look on your face.

“Does he treat you well at least?” Remus asked, if you didn’t want to be with him. He hoped the other person treated you better.

“Because if he doesn't, I can treat you well. I swear, Y/n just give me one more chance. This feeling I have of you hasn't changed.” Remus is breathing heavily.

“Whatever feelings you have of me will pass, Remus. That feeling will pass.”

“What if it doesn’t?” Remus asks softly. “I have a hard time believing that. Who wouldn't want sweet and cute Lupin.”

Remus chuckles but his eyes are filled with remorse. “It took a prank to finally help me figure out who I wanted and in the end I lost you.”

“I’m sorry about the prank. It was cruel.” Remus shakes his head and tells you not to worry. James, Lily, Sirius and Peter got Shelley at the end and turned her hair into a troll hair for a month.

===

Lily was surprised when she saw Severus waiting outside of her class. He looked nervous and he called out her name. Her friends glared at him but she dismissed them, asking them to go on without her.

“Hey Severus.” Lily said as she walked in front of him.

“Hi.” Severus said back, tucking his hands in the pockets of his pants.

“I wanted to ask you something.” Lily frowned, She hasn’t spoken to him in a year and all of sudden he wanted to talk to her.

“I know you hate me for what I did.” Lily was about to shake her head and tell him to leave her alone but he raised his hand when she was about to speak.

“I hate myself for what I did. I can’t take it back but I am sorry. I wanted to know if it’s okay with you-.” Lily’s eyes widened when Severus asked to ask you out on a date.

“I’m only asking because if she said no I don’t want you to make fun of her or get mad at her. I have fallen for her, Lily.” Severus flinched when Lily hugged him. So shocked that he didn’t even hug her back.

“Are you serious?! Are you telling me the truth?” Severus nods at her.

“Severus, ask her. If you like her, do it!”

“You won’t get mad. I don’t want you to think I’m stealing your friend.” Lily shakes her head quickly.

“Of course not!” Lily pulled Severus to an empty classroom demanding how this happened. Severus kept his eyes on his lap, playing with his fingers as he told her how he saw you crying. Lily noticed a smile on Severus’ lips when he told her when he realized his feelings for you. His dark eyes sparkled the same way Remus’ eyes did whenever he spoke about you.

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utterdisaster1 · 4 months ago

Text

The Teenage Foolishness

Pairing: Sirius Black x male!reader angst at certain point, kinda smut at another. If you haven't read the previous post/chapter whatever, Y/N is muggle-born

Hope you like it! TW: use of Y/N, internalised homophobia, pining, erotic thoughts, erotic things in general, AMAB! reader, swearing, mentions of war, mentions of toxic family

After the first year, the following two were not particularly remarkable. That is not to say that the days were mundane, or that nothing interesting ever happened; rather, you were immersed in a routine devoid of anything exceptional to distinguish it.

You and the rest of the Marauders—a nickname coined by Lily of all people - "Unbelievable! You cost us 50 points, and for what?! Marauding around the castle like vagabonds… I cannot comprehend what is so special or enjoyable about being as much of a nuisance as Peeves!" - continued to pursue your intention of making the most of your years at the school, pranking those who deserved it (mainly the Slytherins) and not taking life too seriously

At times, you felt that James and Sirius, in particular, went a little overboard in targeting a specific individual, but simultaneously, he gave as good as he got, so you did not see much issue with the clear rivalry between your group and Severus Snape.

You continued to learn, to excel, and to immerse yourself in magical education, relentless in your persuit of knowing everything.

In your third year, you began tutoring some first-years in Transfiguration and Charms. You also encountered your first struggle - Arithmancy.

You chose it alongside Ancient Runes and Care of Magical Creatures as your electives, thinking it wouldn’t be too challenging.

You did enjoy the Creatures class the most and found Ancient Runes, which included lessons on enchanting objects, warding, and curse-breaking, truly fascinating. You were always eager for those classes.

But Arithmancy… You thought it would simply be wizarding maths, but it was far from that. You barely scraped by in it and fully intended to drop it before fifth year. Spell-crafting be damned; if you had to read one more paragraph on the properties of numbers and shapes, you felt like you might spontaneously combust. And preparing for an OWL in it… that would be unbearable.

Another struggle that began in third year was dealing with feelings. Suddenly, you started experiencing peculiar emotions. Of course, there had been boys who caught your eye before, but it had never been significant. However, the affections you might have had, or not, seemed to grow in intensity.

Suddenly, instead of a mere sense of admiration, a deep longing emerged. You would catch yourself imagining how delightful it would be to walk hand in hand with them, to embrace them, to kiss them, to…

Even with the knowledge that your proclivities were not frowned upon in the wizarding world, the years you spent before joining it had conditioned you to feel guilt and denial. It felt as though you were being pushed by shame from one side and encouragement from the other, leaving no space for action.

So you suppressed those feelings, turning to those shameful late-night moments in which you inflicted some self-pleasure upon yourself.

You felt guilty thinking about schoolmates that way. The only comfort was that it usually wasn’t someone you were particularly close with, so objectifying them wasn’t thrown in your face the next morning.

Then the fifth year arrived, and with it, a very changed, taller, better-built Sirius.

He said he had spent most of his summer at his uncle Alphard's house, which had a Quidditch pitch nearby, allowing him to fly and work out every day. Training for his Beater position on the Quidditch team involved a lot of work from his arm and chest muscles.

And what a sight those muscles were, when he took his outer robe off, leaving only a thin dress shirt on. They were enthralling to watch, and it took you greater effort than fighting any duel, facing any Slytherin, or preparing for any exam to avert your gaze elsewhere.

It didn't help that he paid particular attention to you. There was something in his gaze that made you want to squirm.

It's worth mentioning you changed over the summer too. You barely had to lift your head now to look your dad straight in the eyes (which came with your mum droning on about needing to buy an entirely new wardrobe for you since all your clothes were too short). Your face became thinner, and your jawline more pronounced. You would often run, not from schoolmates, but for the simple release of pent-up energy from being deprived of magic (you would curse whoever it was that created the Decree for the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery, if they were still alive) and worrying about a possible raid from Death Eaters all summer.

You did try to act casual. But you were also 16. And suddenly, when the night came, the only thoughts you had, were of him.

His nature didn't help either. He was always affectionate with touch - an arm around your shoulder when walking together, his head always resting on someone's lap while relaxing on the couches in the Gryffindor common room. He did that with all of his friends.

So it meant he did it with you as well. In those moments, you begged to be back in the Arithmancy classroom, listening to lectures about numerological transcendence or whatever else you couldn't grasp, because it would still be easier than withstanding the force of Sirius Black's friendly affection. Friendly.

You always made sure to keep the outer robes on, so you could cover your crotch and the erection that occured whenever he tugged you closer to him or rested his head on your arm.

After one very close call, when he laid his head on your lap, you realised it had become essential never to sit next to him again. Not as long as you felt the way you did. It didn't help that the thoughts of his mouth so close to that particular area contributed to your unseemly activities later that evening and were followed by a sense of shame when you saw him the next morning while preparing to go down for breakfast.

And even if you told yourself that you were dealing with this insufferable infatuation, you couldn't help but feel jealous of the people who sparked Sirius' interest. You weren't the only person who had noticed how he had changed over the summer, after all.

It seemed every other week there would be a new girl clutching onto him like a lifeline. And considering the affection he showed his friends, you shouldn't have been surprised by how flagrant he was with them.

The shameless make-out sessions, blatant touching, and disgusting displays like feeding each other were hard to ignore. But over time, you got used to it. You didn't accept it, but it was just something that happened, yet another flaw in the world. It still was better than the fact that there was an actual war happening outside the school halls, a war against people like you, or rather, about ridding the world of people like you.

But then, one day, Sirius showed up for lunch with a boy. A Ravenclaw, one year above you. All of you were confused. And confusion turned into many different emotions when the ministrations that Sirius' girlfriends received were extended to him.

If you felt uneasy before, now you were actually physically sick. You wanted to vomit, to break something, or rather someone.

Ironically, one of the few comforts you had in the entire situation was knowing that if you never stood a chance with him, it wasn't because of your appearance or any other personal attribute, but simply because he was exclusively into girls. This made it easier to avoid letting yourself fantasise about being with him. At that point, however, the reality stung more sharply—knowing that he chooses not to have an interest in you, despite being open to it. It just made it all more painful.

So you quickly excused yourself and exited the Hall. You didn't run and cry, thinking about jumping off the astronomy tower like some heartsick, stupid people would do. You weren't sad. You were angry. Furious. Livid. Violent.

You hadn't noticed Remus going after you, all the way to the Forbidden Forest. You hadn't noticed him as you were throwing all known curses and hexes at a large pile of rocks, annihilating it in the process.

But after you were done, and decided to go back, there he stood. With this look of pity. Maybe you weren't as subtle as you thought, or maybe it was him being his usual, too perceptive self.

"I would say that it gets better, but I'm not going to start lying to you," he said.

"Are you- Do you- You too? With Sirius, I mean," you replied.

"Merlin no!" and after a short pause, "Well, maybe a little last year. But it went out the window after he insulted Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, massive turn-off," he said, the last part with a scoff, "And I'm more partial to the fair sex, being honest with you."

"How long have you known?" you asked.

"You know how my senses are heightened? Due to- you know. Well, some stronger emotions have the slightest scents that I can detect. They don't really compare to any normal ones… well, the technicalities don't really matter. Arousal is one of those scents, and I smelled it off of you while you were looking at him in the distance once or twice."

"Well, thank you for not calling me out on it," you said with the slightest of smiles. At that point, you also had to ask, because you knew it would nag you forever, "So if you can actually smell emotions, that means that things like…" You didn't exactly know how to ask whether he could smell you wank in the night, so you just made a gesture. He didn't seem unsettled by your question, to his credit.

"Oh, yeah, at first it was quite uncomfortable, but you weren't the first one to do it... Sirius was always hyper and he is the oldest, I suppose," he said, then continued, "I learned a spell to shield my bed from all smells in Second Year, but I forget to cast it sometimes," he said while rubbing the nape of his neck.

"Well, I've never felt more sorry for you, especially with Peter's dirty socks..." you said.

“Yes, well, it comes with living with four other teenage boys. But I’m the one who’s supposed to comfort you right now, not the other way around,” he said with a small laugh.

“You did say it wouldn’t just get better, as if from experience… Who were you that angry about? You, the calmest, most reasonable and even-tempered Gryffindor in history.”

“There was one particular girl that Sirius had dated about a month ago, and now even if I did try to ask her out, I’d be asking Sirius’ ex out. It did irk me, knowing he would drop her after a week or so anyway.”

“A shame you hadn’t told me; then we could wallow in self-pity together,” you chuckled a little. Maybe Freud was onto something with his “just talk about it and it will get better.” Although, you were also quite tired, so maybe there was simply no energy for anger at the moment.

“Do you want to smash some things too? I could conjure more rocks if you’d like,” you asked.

He smiled. “No, but I will tell you if I do. Let’s head back; I think we’re already late for Potions.”

You groaned. “Fuck Potions, we’re both rubbish at it anyway. Besides, I don’t know if I have it in me not to throw some beetle eyes or something equally disgusting at him right now.” You said this as you started walking back towards the castle.

“I am a prefect, you know,” Remus replied.

“Oh? So I suppose it wasn’t you who turned Mulciber’s hair into snakes yesterday?” you responded with a small chuckle.

He just huffed but didn’t rebut.

______________________________________________________________

What you and Remus failed to talk about and consider were appearances. There was nothing out of the ordinary with Remus’, but you, however, looked as if you’d just emerged from a fighting ring - messy hair, ruffled clothes, and scratches from the rock shards that you hadn’t even registered.

After worried questions stemming from a calm, “What happened?” from Peter, to James’ intense, “Did someone do this to you?! Tell. Me. Who!” you just said you’d fallen down the stairs, and Remus had taken you to the infirmary, which explained your absence during Potions class. And since it was just a theory lesson, you doubted Slughorn noticed or cared much.

The rest of the day, after fixing yourself up in the bathroom, you tried to act as usual. And it mostly worked. But, as seemed to be the pattern of the day, Sirius disrupted your attempts at casualness. It wasn’t his fault per se, since you always sat together in Defence Against the Dark Arts. Normally, you would chat and joke, having already mastered the subject. But today, you didn’t even want to see him, let alone talk to him.

Sirius wasn’t stupid, nor as self-conceited as some believed. He noticed the lack of banter and witty responses from you and asked, “Are you okay? You seem a little off today.”

Clearly he didn’t connect the dots that your being "a little off" might be related to your supposed fall down the stairs. His mind was probably preoccupied with that Ravenclaw arsewipe he had shown up with, making it clear he was bi.

So you simply responded, “I’m fine,” and started taking notes. This really set Sirius off, because you never did that in Defence class. By Fourth Year, you had enough knowledge and skill to score an Outstanding in NEWT for the subject. You had even ventured into Knockturn Alley to buy books on martial magic, most containing curses only found in the restricted section of the school library. He knew why you were so determined to master this area of magic. With raids, disappearances, and murders reported every other day, who wouldn’t be?

Sirius thought that maybe something else had happened other than the fall, but what could it be? No one dared to challenge you to a duel or sneak up on you after you sent the youngest Yaxley brother to the infirmary with so many afflictions and injuries he didn’t get out until a week later (you only got three nights of detention since it was technically self-defence after he tried to use the body-bind curse on you from behind first. The Gryffindor privilege probably played a part in that as well). You didn’t seem to be under a side-effect of pain medicine either.

He only realized the lesson was over because of your abrupt departure the moment the bell rang.

But there was someone with you when whatever happened had occurred - Remus. He had the answers, and Sirius was adamant about finding out the truth. But when he turned towards the desk Remus sat at, it was empty as well.

Suspicious.

Both of you disappearing halfway through the day and then coming back disheveled with a very convenient story... Could you...? Together?

Now, with his mind racing, Sirius reached the only plausible conclusion: it became clear he was into guys too, and one of you must have gotten jealous, so you sorted it out. The idea that Remus could have been the one to be with you like that, while Sirius was left out, sparked something he never wanted to feel about any of his friends - jealousy.

He loved Moony, don't get him wrong. But it was you and him that always had a little stack of letters after the holidays for each other, since neither could send them during the summer. "Merlin! I didn't know we had some summer essays set to write. What will we do, Pete?" James would always laugh. It was you and him that hated going away from Hogwarts because the castle was where you truly felt at home. It was you and him that sat together by the Black Lake in you spot, sharing those quiet moments that seemed to stretch into forever.

Why wouldn't you consider him for something more, then? He wasn't a saint, he knew that. But he also had access to mirrors, and he was a friend as long as Moony was.

And he had to admit, when he saw you on the train in September, desire surged through him. But you never seemed to look at him too long, let alone show any sign of actual interest. So he tried what he had seen work on those desperate girls and used all the tricks he had. But those attempts only seemed to turn you off, making you retreat from him. He recalled that evening when he laid his head on your lap, asking you to braid or play with his hair, and instead of blushing and giggling like those girls did, you immediately needed to get back to the dorm, claiming there was "a book you forgot to return to the library, and you better run before Madam Pince closes it" or some other excuse. After that, you avoided sitting next to him, except for during class.

When he saw you could defend yourself from the baby death eaters - commonly known as Slytherins - he stopped pretending not to associate with you. He was openly best friends with a "blood traitor," which, in his parents' eyes, was as bad as being a "filthy little Mudblood." So, he would get punished anyway.

He cherished the surprise on your face when he sat next to you at the Sorting Ceremony, the delight in your eyes when you realised he wasn’t playing the charade he had in First Year.

He was always honest with you. He never felt it important to discuss his sexuality, especially since you never mentioned yours. He assumed you shared his sentiment. But now it was clear that you had discussed it with someone - just not him. Maybe you and Remus had a special spot as well? Or maybe, the spot by the lake was only special to Sirius, and you came there only when dear Remus was too busy, or worse, out of pity, because Sirius would sit there sometimes, hoping you would appear.

He hated that feeling. You were his friends. He shouldn't be mad at you two being close, being together. But he was. He was angry with you, and he was even more furious with himself.

Maybe if he just mellowed down his advances, you would start to show similiar affection towards him as well? Or maybe you did feel it, but was just awkward about it and he hadn't noticed?

And then there were the flings.

So on one hand, you might be plainly uninterested, wanting nothing more than friendship. On the other, you might have been interested, but he had ruined it.

He had ruined it all, just as he always seemed to. His mother had often said so. His father, his br- Regulus, never disagreed.

He didn't ever realise he was now alone, with tears glistening in his eyes, heading towards nowhere in particular

______________________________________________________________

The rest of the week was tense for the Marauders. Sirius retreated as he had after his first Howler back in First Year. Fortunately, this time he already had James. Pete stuck by him too, offering snacks in the evenings and welcome distractions. Both of them knew Peter didn’t need help with Herbology, yet he asked Sirius for it, for example.

Not that you and Remus were there to witness most of these moments. You were cooped up in the library, sometimes together with Lily, Marlene, and Mary.

You didn’t know if it was just instinct or if you were that easy to read, but the three girls took to comforting you as well. Your study sessions continued with the addition of Lily’s dormmates, which made things much more fun, but also much riskier, since Madam Pince didn’t take kindly to any disturbances of silence, and snickering was very much a disturbance.

One evening, Marlene said that when she was sad she did her first piercing by herself. She mentioned it off-handedly, while being scolded by Lily and Mary for getting her nose infected - that attempt was not as successful as the first one “or numerous following ones!” Marlene didn’t fail to add.

So, when you were returning to the common room, you asked her which piercing wasn’t too painful and if she would be willing to do it for you. She eagerly agreed, recommending helix piercings since earlobes were “too obvious.”

And as much as it wasn’t the most pleasant experience, it wasn’t too bad either. You settled for piercings in each ear. Marlene said it was fate, since the Hogsmeade trip would be happening in two days. You would be able to buy your own jewellery, wearing hers for now.

You were barely the first person to have some alterations to their appearance done, so it didn’t gain much attention from most, only your friends, who you didn’t have many of, especially since three of your dormmates seemed engrossed with something they were sharing with neither you nor Remus. Even Mary said you looked "dashing", and with her being one of the icons (Marlene had called her a guru) of style by that point, you knew it really meant something.

You saw the dark circles under Sirius’ eyes, as well as how puffy they were. You wanted to comfort him, truly you did. He was your friend, first and foremost. But now, it seemed he was avoiding you. You thought of cornering him somehow but thought better of it. One can’t make Sirius Black do or say anything he doesn’t want to do. And he did not take kindly to attempts at trying.

So, you left him be and didn’t address any of the occasional looks you got from him with anything else but, what you hoped was, a comforting smile.

The trip to Hogsmeade was as eventful as any other, but with you not only buying earrings but some rings as well. You made sure none were made of silver, mindful of Moony.

The Sunday, however, proved to be something entirely else. You were planning on writing the Potions essay and reading the latest issue of Transfiguration Today. You hoped there would be at least something more than a mere mention of the Animagus process, having found only some sparse remarks on it in the books you’d read in the library so far.

There was always the Restricted Section, but you needed the Cloak for that, and James was always with Sirius.

And as much of a pain as it was to write about the Draught of Peace, it was one of the possible potions to brew for your OWL exam, and you needed one in Potions, no matter how much you loathed the idea of studying the subject at NEWT level. But you needed the NEWT to be allowed into the Auror Training, and complaining would get you nowhere.

But when you were finally done and reached for the magazine on your nightstand, the dorm room burst open, and in came James, Peter, and Sirius. And they came with purpose.

“Right, we’re going to settle this. You,” James pointed at you and Sirius, “will stay in this room until you’re okay again. I will let you starve to death if I have to.” And with that, he came out, locking the door.

You looked at Sirius and didn’t know what else to say but, “Always with dramatics, that one.”

Sirius didn’t respond at first, just looked at you for some time. You avoided his stare, which clearly was the wrong thing to do, seeing what he asked you next.

“Why can’t you even look at me?” he said in a tone much more broken than Sirius should sound like. You had only witnessed a few times over the five years you’d known each other. So you did look at him, straight in the eyes, and responded.

“Of course I can look at you.” You really didn’t know how to handle this. You didn’t even know what exactly it was about.

“Since we returned in September, you don’t want to, though,” after a short pause, he asked, “We’re friends, right? Friends tell each other things.”

“Of course we’re friends. Why would you question that?” you said immediately.

He looked at you, intensely, expectantly. But you really didn’t know what he could want you to say. There was no way he knew about your crush, right?

Seeing that he wasn’t going to receive what he had hoped for, he said with a clipped tone, “Then why didn’t you tell me about you and Remus? Or James and Pete, for that matter?”

Now you were really bewildered. You wanted to ask what he meant, but he clearly wasn’t finished.

“I bet you told Marls and the other two, though, always hanging around with each other now. I mean, I could understand if you’d just started and were figuring things out, but once you’re having sex, I think it’s serious enough to mention it to people you claim are your family!” he finished, shouting.

“What do you- Are- Sex!? With who!?”

“Well, Moony of course, unless you were doing it with Marlene in the third-floor bathroom on Thursday too!”

"For fuck's sake, have you taken something!? Or is this some very elaborate prank!?" You didn’t allow him to respond just yet. "I’m not having sex with anyone, I’m not in a relationship with anyone, Marlene only pierced my ears," you said, pointing at your ears. "And I really don’t think that Remus fetching me from the Forbidden Forest is that significant to mention!"

Sirius seemed surprised. You rarely screamed or shouted, preferring to just hex someone if they were going too far. Of all the questions now flooding his mind, he asked,

"What were you doing in the Forbidden Forest?"

"I was smashing up some rocks, if it’s that important to you. And I left the centaurs one of the phoenix feathers I found last year in the Astronomy Tower, along with a very sincere apology letter the next day, so I doubt they’ll want to hunt me down. It was only a pile of rocks anyway; I made sure not to harm any trees or animals."

"Why?"

"You know centaurs are the ones that planted and protect the forest. They demand respect. I doubt me coming in all unreasonable and entitled to destroy parts of it, even as irrelevant as a pile of-" At that, he interrupted you.

"I don’t care about the centaurs! Why were you wrecking rocks, and if that’s what happened on Monday, why are you cross with me?"

"I— I’m not cross with you, and it doesn’t matter why. It’s stupid, and I’m dealing with it."

"Maybe I could help, you know. Or at least you could have told me."

You were getting sick of his apparent entitlement to all your issues and that, mixed with still not fully gone anger at him over the Ravenclaw, prompted you to say with a clipped tone, "Well, you seem pretty preoccupied these days. I wouldn’t want to get groped by accident."

His eyes widened, cheeks reddened, and his mouth opened and closed in a repeated cycle. He was visibly thinking about what to say next.

"Is that why you’ve been avoiding me? Seeing me with those girls?"

You barely even registered saying, "You forgot the Ravenclaw already?"

At that you saw a hint of a smirk on his face, but what was more noticeable was the step he took towards you. "Did it bother you? Seeing me like that?"

Oh, you definitely didn’t like the direction this conversation was going. So you quickly tried to escape the looming vision of actually confessing your feelings to him.

"Who wouldn’t be bothered? People do go to that Hall to eat their food. You and whoever else was your conquest of the week were trying to eat each other."

He only inched closer. "No one else was demolishing the forest because of that, though, were they?"

You faltered. You were losing this argument, and you’d have to go past Sirius to reach your wand, which you had inconveniently left on the bed.

"You know, a lot of things just started to make sense to me..." He was almost within touching distance.

"Well, enlighten me then," you said, hoping your tone was more confident than you felt.

"The way you distanced yourself, wouldn’t look at me too long... I thought I might have done something bad or wrong, but now I’m realising," and after a pause, in a much huskier tone, "I actually might have done the opposite."

He did touch you now, caressing your arm. "I’m going to ask you something, Y/N, and I need you to be honest." The hand went from your arm to your chin, directing your head to look him in the face. You hadn’t realised you had been looking just past his shoulder for most of that monologue.

The only thing you did realise, was that Sirius was tall.

"If I kissed you right now, would you return it?"

You were overwhelmed. And, more importantly, starting to get hard. No.

But apparently, your subconscious decided to answer for you, and you nodded.

Sirius didn’t wait a second. He leaned in, practically attacking your mouth.

The kiss was rough, with teeth clashing at first. You supposed it was probably clumsy, but you didn’t have anything to compare it with.

You tried to mimic what Sirius was doing, and in a moment of daring (you were still a Gryffindor, after all), you bit his lower lip, eliciting a low groan from Sirius.

You usually learned best through practice, and kissing apparently wasn’t an exception. You became more confident with each second his lips moved with yours, and when you felt his tongue brush against your lower lip, you instinctively opened your mouth.

The tongue slipped in immediately, accompanied by a satisfied hum from Sirius. It was strange, the sensation of it in your mouth at first, against your own. But you quickly found yourself enjoying it, and the fact that his hands were now firmly on your waist, running up and down, certainly didn’t discourage you.

For someone who detested the very thought of being overpowered, you surprisingly enjoyed Sirius’ dominant position right now.

You rested your arms on his shoulders and started running your right hand through the hair on the back of his head, eliciting another groan, of satisfaction, you hoped.

You began to move your tongue along with his, and sooner than you realised, it became a battle. You were growing more and more eager to explore his mouth as well.

The fact that you were currently making out with your long-term crush was not lost on you, nor did it fail to make you even more aroused with each passing second. You had imagined a moment like this many times. In fact, you had imagined many other moments, and seeing how physical Sirius was, there was a big chance of them turning into memories or maybe, if you dared to think, regular occurrences.

In fact, you wouldn’t settle for anything less. You were not interested in becoming one of many in the long line of Sirius Black’s dalliances, as Remus liked to say sometimes.

And so, with great effort - both in actually willing yourself to do it, as well as managing against Sirius’ strength - you pulled away.

His eyes were half-lidded, pupils dilated, but a brow started to rise in question.

"I’m not ruining our friendship for a week of fun with you, Sirius," you said, still breathless, but it was clear you were being frank right now.

"I’m not either," he responded. "I want it to be more," he said.

"What are you saying?" you asked with a smirk, knowing very well what, but still wanting to hear it.

He rolled his eyes playfully. "And you complained about James’ flair for dramatics," he said, and immediately dropped to one knee and took your hand. "Y/N L/N, will you, the breathtaking vision of enchanting beauty, the enthralling light of brilliance, do me the honour of allowing me to become your partner in love and life?" he asked in an over-dramatic tone.

You laughed and said in the same manner, "Sirius Black, your words have melted my heart completely. I’d be thrilled to become your boyfriend."

He pretended to cry, followed by a quite amusing spectacle of pretending to die out of sheer joy, and then stood up, held you to him, and kissed you again, this time more tenderly. This kiss didn’t seem desperate but wasn’t chaste in any way either. You pulled him closer by his shirt, having your chests press together. He seemed very satisfied with it.

He was starting to pull your sweater off when the doors burst open with James in the front yet again, this time shrieking. Remus, who apparently joined him and Peter in the common room during your time alone with Sirius, said, "Turns out you were right, they were suffocating each other... Not in the way you predicted though," he added with a low chuckle.

Peter’s face was as red as a beet, and James just stared. After a while, he said, "I call you both my brothers, so it’s incest, you know. I’ll tell my mum."

"You’re just worried I’ll cut into your cuddle time with him," you said to James, receiving a laugh from Remus and a smirk from Sirius that contradicted his severe tone.

"He could never cut into that, Jamie, you don’t have to worry."

James decided to just shove him with a laugh as a response.

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