#seth is. so fucking good at this stuff it makes me angry

[oplishin]

In 2022, seth weaponized his history with Roman against him, and it uh. Didn’t go so hot for him, it ended with Roman murdering him with a steel chair.

In 2024, seth does the same trick again, and Roman’s ready for it! Hits him before he can even really get in the ring. But Seth’s learned in ways Roman hasn’t. He knows now that if Roman has the chance to get him back, to hurt him, he can’t resist (i am thinking about how Roman went back to hit Seth in 2022, even after everything was over). And Seth uses his own self destruction to help Cody.

It’s a fabulous character arc/moment: jn 2022 he selfishly tries to manipulate Roman, in 2024 he unselfishly uses the same strategy because he knows Roman hurting him will save Cody.

Big fan of incredible lack of self preservation and willingness to do himself harm here!!! And the fact that Seth very very literally recreated his initial betrayal as an act of penance. There’s no way he brought that steel chair to the ring thinking he was going to be able to use it.

[codename-adler]

i neeeeeeeeed to know more abt your trojan ocs anytime you wanna share

heehee i got a special pookie for ya jo 🫶 (trojans ocs roster here)

06: Mateo Solano (22) USC Trojans Goalkeeper

here comes theeeeee... Bitch™

don't got a gif for him sorry

i also now realize i accidently gave him Seth's number... wow. but believe me, Mateo's sm worse. i love mi princesita Seth. i don't even like Mateo. (jk. but like, he sucks a whole lot before he gets his redemption arc. interpret that however you want.)

he's one of the seniors of the team, he's 5'9 and fucking bitter about it, he studies Spanish because he is a lazy mf who has no plan but to go Pro (fortunately he will)

106% fuckboi energy fr he's insufferable

at the start of the new season (when Jean joins) he is still crabby about Laila having rejected him when he asked her out after their loss to the Foxes (in my universe/wip, Lailalvarez are not together yet bc i want to explore their relationship from the beginnings :) )

Mateo isn't really interested in Laila anyway, though, and he doesn't know why 1) it still stings and 2) he even asked in the first place (perhaps because they are the golden goalie duo of USC, perhaps because she is better than him and has broken records, perhaps because of something else...)

he's also such a bitchy asshole to Jean, because Jean is a beast on the court and Mateo is jealous

he's single and a v because he is waiting for marriage and the right girl (siiiiiiiiike!) (still fuckboi aura tho he's that extra)

comes from a very religious household and he is a practicing believer

he doesn't really have any friends on the team (sad) because he is so prickly and bitchy, but everyone is still kind and open to him because he is very reliable on the court, in the goal, and he does not second-guess or question authority, he's very good at following orders and instructions, always aiming for the best

and though it's good for everyone that he stays in goal because of his problematic attitude that would get the Trojans carded if their opponents heard him talk, the power of bitch he possesses is also a great asset, as he easily makes any enemy player lose their temper with his saccharine remarks paired with a Colgate smile

now! the plot twist!

Mateo is what you would get if internalized homophobia + comphet had two legs and an attitude problem

he is as homophobic as Seth and Aaron were, and even more if I dare say, and though he's never outwardly a hater and never uses slurs (at least he holds back on that for Jesus), he's such a bitch about homosexuality... it makes him so angry and queasy, he'll be rude af to you, he'll leave the room fuming, not participate in conversations, that kind of thing. he tries very hard to forget about Jeremy, to overlook it, and he's not like Lucas, questioning Jeremy's decision because of his sexuality, but it's so much better when Jeremy is single... (ik how this sounds, but believe me when i say he does not have a repressed crush on Jeremy, or Jean. that's just his Exy inferiority complex.)

thing is, it becomes incredibly difficult for him to ignore all of that gayness when Laila and Alvarez get together (oh), when Levi suddenly drops Angie to get closer with their assistant coach, when Jeremy clearly has a huge thing for Jean, the Drivers come out with their own gay thang, when Coach Rhemann himself gets his shit together with his long-lost broody ex... Mateo is literally surrounded by homos.

and sure, the wlw stuff never really bothered him, didn't get the appeal (and why do you think Mateo!!!), but with almost all of his authority figures dabbling in the gay, Mateo is kind of a caged animal, and he's bound to lose control and do some very stupid things, like start fights, get benched, punch a wall or 2...

oh, and there's Yanko too.

infuriating ginger man that won't leave him the fuck alone. mountain man of steal who is somehow always right, and chill. the designated Mateo-handler, apparently, because Jeremy had to delegate that hot potato to someone with less... undesirable traits to Mateo (i'm not sure yet how the rest of the team handles his outbursts bc he's not open about why he has them, not very vocal, but there's definitely a specific thing wrong at play here whenever they happen, and maybe Jeremy has an inkling, idk, tbd)

so it really comes out of NOWHERE. nobody, NOBODY has a fucking clue. least of all Mateo. then suddenly Yanko has had enough and pushes Mateo into a wall, and kisses him, very publicly, and Mateo kisses back.

there's a whole lot that goes on behind the scenes before that first fiery PDA, and after that it all goes downhill for a while before balance is found again. anyhoo. enemies-to-lovers ftw ✊

Mateo's family is very loving and supporting of him btw <3

and that's all for now for the resident pendejo of the Trojans, Mateo Solano 👿

[stalkedbytrains]

Beneath the Electric Sky: Chain One Sequence Two: A Series of Minor Crimes

I introduced Io to Seth. There was already some tension there because I think Io realized he fucked up on the ride over.

"I'm Seth. You must be Io."

The pair shook hands.

"You got me," Io said. "You're the partner. Right, well you need someone to get inside and open a door?"

Seth bristled a little bit. It was clear he wanted to introduce himself as my superior or something more haughty and worthy of him.

"And you must be our conman. I'll be keeping my eye on you."

"Don't worry, you've got nothing I want," Io said as he gave himself a small tour of the apartment.

Seth scoffed. "You sure about that?"

"Yeah, I don't give a shit about new tech or whatever it is you're after. I wanted the dumbest, oldest stuff you can find. I was trying to steal a cybertruck."

My partner only got angrier. I quietly congratulated myself on picking the right person to bring in. Io could do the job and do it well, but pissing off Seth was a nice bonus.

Io was a pretty unassuming person. Average height, average build, average everything, which he would probably use to his advantage as not standing out in any significant way was something that could really work in his favor.

"What do you need to do this job?" Seth asked tensely.

"You have a hacker on staff? Because unless things have changed much more drastically than I'm aware of, Synthia certainly can't handle the asks. And no offense, Sep-"

"Seth."

"That's what I said. You don't look like you can hack your way out of this room."

I couldn't help but smile. "I missed you Io."

"Arc! Get in here! We've got a job for you!" Seth yelled.

Io moved next to me so he could conspiratorially whisper to me. "Arc? Really? Bit on the nose with that one don't you think?"

"I've always thought that," I whispered back.

The small in every direction tech walked into the room. If I was thin in a vaguely unhealthy way (I can't help my ultra-enhanced metabolism and the calories required to run this hardware) then Arc was deeply unhealthy. His hair was stringy and all over the place and the electronics poked out of the skin on his face, shoulders, arms, and hands.

He was also Seth's lapdog so I couldn't give a shit what he liked or cared for. He was supposed to do the tech support angle of this little trio and so far he had utterly failed to hold up his side of the job.

"Yeah, what's up?" Arc asked Seth, only looking to him for instruction.

"You're a hacker?" Io asked.

"Yeah, who are you?" Arc countered.

"Someone with a sense of style, Jesus," Io muttered mostly to himself but I heard it and cracked a smile. "I'm the conman. I need you to hack some emails for me."

"Oh, yeah, sure, it's not that this place is tighter than a nuclear waste dump site. I can barely peak at their servers, much less hack an employee's email. The Illuminated Path is next level."

Io rolled his eyes. "Then I suggest you find someone who can hack a single employee's email. It shouldn't be that hard to arrange a phishing scam or something. I thought you people were experts."

"Why the fuck do we need this asshole?" Arc asked indignantly.

"Because you assured me, multiple times, that you couldn't hack any of the security measures around the building, so I got us someone who can get me inside," I snapped at him. "If you can't get Io what he needs then I'm going to find someone else who can help me with this mission and I'll be sure to let Gareth know what dead weight you two have been."

"What do you want?"

Io shrugged. "A couple of back dated emails hiding in someone's folder. Preferably someone high up who is in charge of shipping and receiving. Then some angry emails from them into some subordinate's spam folder about a shipment that is overdue."

"What scam are you pulling?"

"A Trojan horse. I'm going to make a delivery and no one is going to look twice at me because we're playing the angry boss card. Oh and if you can get me a fake manifest and an invoice. Make them look good. If you make them look good enough and I get paid for the delivery then I'll count that towards my fee," Io said.

Arc opened his mouth to say something but Seth cut him off. "Do it."

"Fine. What are we delivering?"

"I'll let you know when we're done stealing it," Io said. "Synthia, let's go steal a truck or two."

"You want me to plant a bunch of emails for something I don't know what it is yet?" Arc asked.

"Well you're the one that said they've got top notch security."

"Synthia, stay with Arc, keep him on task. I'm going with Io," Seth said.

I scoffed. "You think I can keep the keyboard jockey on task? The little fucker never listens to a word I say."

Seth had a look on his face that looked like he tasted ass. Which was his default expression whenever I got my way.

"Fine. Check-in every hour. And we will be listening," Seth threatened.

"Sir, yes sir," I responded, saluting him with my middle finger raised. "Io let's go."

As we turned to leave, I heard Seth tell Arc to get to work, and to start pulling up files on anyone who might be connected to me named Lorelei.

Io was going to pay for that later.

[010·10]

"You work for a bunch of assholes," Io told me as we approached the overnight warehouse for one of the online distributors.

"Yeah I fucking know," I told him as I worked on punching a hole through the electric fence. "And now they know too."

"How the fuck do they know everything?"

"I've got just south of a trillion dollars worth of beyond top of the line technology in me. That kind of money and investment warrants a level of security that cannot be overwritten, ignored, or turned off. Everything I say and do is recorded in excruciating detail."

"Fuck," Io said once I was through the fence. "That's rough."

"Yeah, well. I'm sorry I brought you into this mess," I admitted. "Really. I'm sorry."

Io stopped halfway through the fence. "I truly don't think I've ever heard you apologize for anything."

"New body, new me."

"Well I appreciate seeing you again, getting into shenanigans again. And I'm sorry about before," Io said quietly, as if that would keep the myriad of sensor in me from picking it up. "I'll fix it, I promise."

I couldn't help myself. I shouldn't have been shitty but I had to do it. "I'll believe it when I see it."

After a few minutes of sneaking through the warehouse, dodging drones, and keeping out of sight of the one overnight, overworked, underpaid service worker, we found an access point that gave us manifests for everything being loaded on the trucks in the lot.

"Alright what would be easiest to con some... what are they again?" Io asked.

"Religious cultists and terrorists that are working with extremely illegal and bleeding edge technology. Working in most gene splicing and tech."

"Ah so religious scientists," Io said with as much sarcasm as he could muster. "Love that for them. We're going to need truck... let's see... eh... I think the one in row twelve slot b. Some centrifuges and other medical equipment. Should be helpful."

"Right, what are we standing around here for?"

"Well I'm going to drive, because you are always the worst driver, even now. Just... bad."

"Hey!"

"I also need you to steal me a uniform."

"That would make sense."

Breaking into the locker room and stealing a spare uniform was trivial and I did it in less than two minutes.

In fact, I made it back to Io and the truck he was supposed to be stealing before he had even managed to get the truck open.

"What were you saying about being better than me at this?" I asked.

"I was just waiting on you, the second we drive off things are going to start."

I rolled my eyes and waited for Io to get going. While I had nothing to do I messaged Arc that were were bringing medical equipment, and he should add that to his manifests and hacked emails and stuff.

"Alright we're good to go," Io said as the engine rumbled to life.

"We will be as soon as Arc is done doing his job."

my kofi that hosts early chapters

[brights-place]

A/N: Me when I first watched Marble Hornets, Tribe Twelve and Every Man hybrid ^

Anyways these are some funny Headcannons for the cast of marble hornets that popped up into my head sooo hope you enjoy them!

Marble Hornets Head Cannons

Timothy Wright/Masky

Tim:

-he has a limp due to masky not wanting to rest when he is injured

-bookworm

-The mom friend

-gives big bear hugs

-trust issues

-likes taking naps

-has road rage

-socially awkward around strangers

-neglects himself

-makes really good pancakes

-likes to annoy his coworkers

-very ticklish

-has some bandages and bruises due to masky

-when singing karoke he rocks the stage

-Rollerskating on them haters

-the last thing Tim said to Alex as he stabbed him to death was "This is for everything you took away from us" by 'Us' he mean't Jay,Brian,Seth,Jessica,Amy and his alternate split personality Masky along with Brian's split personality Hoodie.

Yes Masky and Tim are two separate people stuck in the same body. Tim is the man being caught up in a crazy situation and Masky being his crazy murder version, thats why Tim forgets everything that happens when Masky is taken control.

Masky:

-major adhd

-usually pretty chill but when he gets angry, he gets violently angry

-throws tantrums sometimes

-likes climbing trees

-sneaky, but not as sneaky as Hoodie

-loves throwing stones and pebbles at Alex then running away

-jumps onto Hoodies back and clings to him to get on his nerves

-he changed the way his mask looked four different times before he was satisfied with it

-has a habit of tackling his problems (literally)

-hes ticklish, but not as much as Tim

-he was jealous of Jay at the start because Hoodie insisted on protecting him

-Competitive

-Also Roller Skates and flexes on the other proxies about it cause he can do tricks.

Brian Thomas/Hoodie Brian:

-egotistical

-social butterfly

-therapist friend

-sunshine boy

-good grades

-probably the most athletic of the group

-laughs at his own jokes

-always planning fun little road trips

-Mama's boy

-he makes sure to smack anybody who disses on there mother

-Is a Gentleman

-overprotective of his friends

-he once let Tim copy his homework in middle school

-pays for other people's things

-loves playgrounds. Like a lot. When he sees one, he HAS to play on it

-likes taking photos

-under his bed he has a nerf gun stash... Tim and Alex Have been victims when they come over to Brian's

Hoodie

-Serious

-has a BIG love for nature

-unpatient as hell

-does parkour

-sneaky

-secretly clingy

-easily annoyed

-quiet

-enjoys bossing Masky around

-insomniac

-listens to music while doing a job/task or just walking around

-has a habit of chewing on spoons

-His gloves where a gift from his mother...

-He's a mama's boy

-great at hide & seek

-breaks into Alex's apartment and moves stuff around to mess with him (once he rearranged the whole apartment while Alex was sleeping)

-Records the others doing random shit

-has blackmail of everyone

-Always plans everything out

-Hates when they rush in without a plan it pisses him off so after the mission he stares at the group intensely and starts signing in sign language to piss the group off.

Alex Kralie

-Listens to classic music

-Alex Understands and knows sign language due to his mother being deaf so when brian signs he understands whats he's saying

-Laughed when he called Tim 'A man Who's ass is even bigger then his fuck brain'

-Him and Brian have nerf battles when they feel like messing around

-Top student in his collage class

-Allows Amy to put makeup on him cause he loves his girlfriend but is annoyed when someone brings it up.

-Good with Computers

-Serious

-Theater Kid

-Equal rights = Equal Fights

-He has a video of everybody doing dumb shit

-A Rihanna Fan

-Sleep Talks & Walks

-Major Anger Issues

-Send Help to Seths Dog

-Hates dogs (Cause they loud)

-Knows how to play guitar

Jay Merrick/Skully

Jay

-Also A Theater Kid

-Keeps to himself alot

-Introvert

-Tired 24/7

-Doesn't eat a lot so the group have to remind him.

-He was on Set design

-Wrote some Scripts for other Projects

-There all in a box somwhere

-ADHD

-Stims

-gets cold easily

-Collects random stuff

-Wears lots of comfy clothes

-Likes Abba

-Sings his heart out to disney songs when they all are drunk

Skully

-Feral

-Jay's alter

-Fast Runner

-Introverted until you get to know him more

-becomes an extrovert when he feels comfortable -More annoying than scary but can be scary

-Jay doesn't know about skullys existence until years later.

-I feel like he acts like he's on drugs without actually being on drugs, you know?

-Like either crackhead energy or just really caffeinated (same with Jay sometimes)

-Tried Smoking once

-he was in a coughing fit

-Knows Basic Medical treatment

Jessica

-best delivery person

-She and Tim gossip alot

-Feels like she owes Tim & Hoodie for saving her

-The Cool Aunt

-BEST music taste

-Always brings extra stuff to wherever they go.

-Fights with everybody on who pays for dinner

-Can ROAST the shit outta you

-Her and Amy likes doing girls night

-Amazing Actor

-Paints

-Knows how to play Piano

-Played Rush E to convince Alex for her and Amy to go out

-AMAZING Dancer

Amy

-Did costume design in highschool

-Artist

-Loves Baking

-Did violin, piano, flute and drama in highschool

-Amazing Singer

-Knows how to multi-task

-In Med School

-Gossiping with Jessica and Tim makes her laugh

-Use to drive without a Licences

-Very Flexible

-Goes on picnic dates with Alex

-posts photos of her days on her social media's

-Alex was so shocked when seeing Amy do an Gymanstic trick

-Girl is SKILLED

-Likes pet sitting for seth

-Alex gets pissed due to Amy not letting him have a say

Seth

-Loves his dog -Best uncle figure -Has dozens of photos and videos from trips

-Did cinematography in high school, still doing it in collage -makes music -Met Jay freshman year in high school

-Knows how to make drinks

-being a Bartender was a side job

-Plays with his dog and wants to cry leaving his dog

-Seth has a smirk when dropping off his dog

-Knows how to play Instruments

-Was in the school band

-Fluent in English,German and Dutch

[tobiasdrake]

So, no reason to stick around here when all the fascists have to throw at us are angry megaphone ranting. Let's--

Oh, what fresh hell is this!? That one of ours or one of theirs?

Ah, a Winterfresh hell. Gotcha.

This is fine. Halara can hang both of these jackasses from the scaffolding by their underwear and then we can hop in our sub and leave. Whoever his umbrella-holder is, she can make her own call if she wants to join them or not.

She looks like she could go either way. Similarly high-ranking executive or punch-clock assistant. Or a devotedly loyal punch-clock assistant who mistakenly believes she'll be rewarded for brown-nosing the rich because libertarianism is a thing people believe in for some reason.

She's definitely joining them on the scaffolding.

So Seth's been shielding the Nail Man because he's embezzling church donations and didn't want to lose his income source.

What an utterly mundane and, honestly, fairly satisfying explanation. With the slight twist that he didn't do it.

They're scapegoating Seth to avoid having this blow back on Yomi. Y'know, after Halara runs him up the scaffolding, we bail, and then leak the story to the press.

At least Halara and I know the truth of--

...I guess I'll go fuck myself, then.

Honestly, this is probably for the best. Avoids any awkward questions about that whole "We fucking killed two people!" thing. Why did the Priest and Worshipper suddenly drop dead? Why did the Priest abruptly spring back to life, confess to being the Nail Man, and then flop over like a rag doll? Eh.

Illusions in the rain.

Oh good. So they forget all the cool labyrinth stuff but remember me giving them stink-eye for half the case. Great. Thanks.

I'm going to crawl under a rock and die now.

See you around, Halara. All things considered, you're pretty cool. When you aren't bilking people out of unreasonable sums of money like a goddamn financial predator, that is.

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

HI i just wanted to say that i really enjoy your twilight metas (as those are the only ones ive read so far) and you're a genius. it's awesome to me how realistically you think about characters and the plot, which i have never been able to do because i always get confused. thank you especially for your post about jacob and how the fandom treats him bc ive always had mixed feelings! i love him (the fanon/new moon him ofc) but i also felt rly weird about the whole SA thing, especially as a brown boy thats been villainized (i didnt SA anyone i just realized how that sounds) i understood that it had racist roots but it still...happened, yk? anyways u put it beautifully and its alot easier to understand how i feel about him now. also like everything else u post about!! i despise the cullens w my every being but its so entertaining to see their dynamic and actions laid out. mostly bc it solidifies my hatred but anyways. they also kind of change my views on other characters, like i always kinda liked bella (i dont like alot of things she does but alot of the fan content i see on her made her feel rly relatable) and its rly interesting to see that she would be a kind of absent parent, bc id never considered it like that and it makes so much sense and woah. u have so much evidence to back up ur theories and opinions too--i tend to get lost in fanon but i dont rly do that w ur posts! even ones where ur spitballing its just muah chefs kiss i love. i write alot of self fulfilling fanfiction and tbh it does not feel the same when the characters r too ooc and ur posts have helped a fuck ton! ur super cool and i love ur stuff keep going :)

i do have some questions tho u dont have to acknowledge it at all and ik you tend to focus more on the cullens, but what do you think the wolf pack is like now that jacob, leah, and seth have left, and now that they have so many new members? do you think any other girls would have shifted and how would they be treated? ik leah was kind of alienated in canon not only bc shes a girl but also bc of her feelings, and i cant tell if the pack would be wary of her/treat her the same as leah, or if they would have learned their lesson.

have a good day!

Well first, thank you, I'm very flattered. I'm going to go ahead and acknowledge @therealvinelle here as well as she's I believe the one who originally posted the post about the very complicated topic of Jacob Black and his terrible choices throughout the series.

As for your questions there are a few pack questions in my inbox but it's mostly a matter that people keep asking questions about Bella and she keeps getting eaten.

Also, I'm not sure you want me answering these questions. Like all of Twilight, it's a bleak pit of despair.

But here we go

What About the Pack/Tribe After Breaking Dawn

There's a lot of shit going on in the tribe right now. Jacob leaving is just part of it.

They have an unprecedented number of shifters in the community and that's going to spell... a lot of issues in the years to come.

Namely, per Sam and Emily, domestic violence will be through the roof and kept very hushed up for the understandable reason of these people look like they were mauled by bears. This will also likely increase the number of deaths in the tribe, especially among those who are young. Accidents happen, it's not good, this is going to have a devastating impact on the people.

You also have a lot of angry, disaffected, young men who can no longer really be a part of society. They can't really attend school, can't even really leave the reservation for fear of turning into a wolf, they can't hold a job, at the age of nineteen or younger they each had their futures ripped away from them.

Some, Seth, handle this very well (possibly because he hasn't clued into what this means yet), others like Jake... do not. These people have had their lives turned upside down and in some cases utterly ruined: that's not good in any society.

Then you have the imprinting, lord, the imprinting.

To date, there's the Sam, Emily, and Leah disaster. The three of them handled it very well, but it still utterly destroyed Leah's life and emotional stability. Not helping, of course, is that Leah has had her very identity taken from her, has no privacy, and her only option of escape is to follow Jacob around which... we'll get to in a few paragraphs.

Added to that, you have the Claire/Quil disaster, in which the tribe is desperately trying to handle it by a) keeping it very quiet b) trying to make Quil just be the babysitter. That's unlikely to work out for them and is just angstfest all around and no one's fault.

And then, of course, Jacob/Renesmee. Jacob, having now imprinted, will follow Renesmee to the ends of the earth. He has no other purpose now. Which means that Leah and Seth, who are in his pack, get to follow along and uproot their lives. For the tribe this means they'll never be rid of the Cullens, not truly, and Billy has lost his son entirely. Not to mention it's guaranteed to go awful places.

Then you have the paternity questions this whole thing drudges up, the trauma of these children having to be sacred warriors and having slaughtered demons with human faces, many of whom were also once children and more.

The tribe and the pack are a goddamn mess.

Jacob imprinting on the Cullen hybrid daughter and leaving the tribe? Yeah, it's weird and no one likes it, but that isn't even the peak of the nonsense these people have to deal with.

Would the Other Girls Shift?

No.

Leah seems to have won the genetic shitty lottery. In 600 years of shifting, there has never been another woman, and Leah has all shifting bloodlines in her veins.

It seems Leah was just very unlucky.

Were other girls to shift I imagine they'd face much the same situation. Suddenly teenage boys are witnessing them naked, all the time, they have no choice to become sacred warriors (a role not typically meant for women and which will very much feel like 'the boy's club') and I don't get the idea that anyone learned anything from Leah.

Jake certainly didn't, he just thought she was Uber Bitch until she begged him to let her in his new pack and reminded him she was a human being with feelings.

The concept genuinely had not occurred to him.

TL;DR Remember kids, Twilight is despair

[justagirlsearchingforamuse]

Hot Take: A lot of people diminish or in a way ignore how Ellie feeling and imo focus way too much on how Joel is feeling and proving that he was doing something good rather than realizing that Joel hurt Ellie and imo did something a lot of people would consider selfish and his actions impacted her greatly. His actions deeply hurt her and just because he had good intentions doesn’t erase the fact that he hurt Ellie. It’s always about Joel just wants to protect Ellie and care for her whilst yes he does and he’s valid wanting to do so, he literally doesn’t have a right as to how she’ll feel about his choices. He has no right to imo embarrass her and make her feel like she can’t handle Seth, he has no right to lie to her about something that is about her, information she should know. Joel imo is a good man, he has flaws and stuff but just because I believe that doesn’t mean I don’t think him lying to Ellie was a bad choice or that he shouldn’t have jumped in between her and Seth at the dance, that he shouldn’t feel a right as to how or what she wants her life to mean. It’s always about proving that what Joel did was good or that the fireflies were terrible and people often put logic into this and brings morals into it when it’s people who are desperate for a fucking cure, people won’t always think logically and it can reap terrible consequences. I feel what Joel did was neither good nor bad but a choice that is flawed and not completely good or completely for Ellie and I feel people wanted to pretend that him lying to her and doing what he did should be forgiven because he has her best interests at heart. What he did, he took away her choice and yes the fireflies did so as well but ultimately what he did isn’t something to be easily looked over and I feel the fandom so badly wanted it to be looked over so they could the perfect father-daughter relationship that was seen in the first game. But their relationship is flawed, the hell were people thinking when they thought that we’d get a game that completely erases what Joel did and the sacrifices that were made in order to keep Ellie alive. Their relationship was flawed and I feel a lot of people don’t see that. Not every relationship has to be perfect without me wanting to still route for it or enjoy it and I enjoy Joel and Ellie’s relationship, one of the best in gaming history but just because I say that doesn’t mean I ignore what Joel did. His choices have ultimately been diminished down to, he saved Ellie rather than he made the choice to actively massacre an entire hospital of people, even taking away Marlene and brutally killing her, one of Ellie’s longest connections to it. It’s not always about how Joel feels, it’s always about Joel when it was Ellie’s story being told from his perspective, I hate that people can’t admit that Joel made a choice that hurt Ellie and that the intentions behind it weren’t completely selfless. People can’t accept that their faves make bad choices and sometimes selfish ones, if they can own up to it and try to be better, then I don’t think the person is bad. Joel isn’t a bad person but someone who made a flawed choice with some selfish intentions behind it, Ellie is allowed to be mad and shouldn’t just forgive him because he cares about her and only had her best interests at heart, it shouldn’t change or even impact the pain he caused her. Ellie’s feelings are valid and shouldn’t be diminished or made into something else, she’s valid for being fucking angry and not liking him because of this choice he made for her. It’s not even about just them both, it’s about a man making a somewhat flawed and selfish choice that impacted those around him and those who were deeply connected to the situation but it’s always the fireflies are bad and terrible and Joel did a good thing. Characters make flawed choices and sometimes selfish ones but you have to show the impact of these choices whether good or bad or in between these choices will affect those around them and I hate that people really can’t see that.

[socialanxiety-queen]

My thoughts on the last conjuring video:

• Their previewing music is giving me some Viking vibes and I’m here for it.

•Carousel Solby is happiness

• The fact they said their names to the owners is just scary as shit and I feel this could be a weird trap from the demons to get them back in the house.

• Advertising xplr club and I weep for I am poor

• Seth lasting only 30 secs

• Josh and Seth hell yeah

• I think the Amanda and Scott in the sand is just a coincidence, someone who visited before them could of written their names there. But who knows, maybe the spirits write down fake ass people in their mean girls sand book. “Amanda is such a fake betch” -scribbles her name in the sand with gel pen-

• “Maybe they want us to do videos with more mediums”

Stop Sam. Please stop. Maybe the spirits are actually telling you guys to stay away from them, because clout chasing fake mediums Amanda are harmful to spirits.

• Also thank you Sam and Colby for saying everything about Bathsheba is speculation and rumors you rarely hear anyone state that. 🥰

She was buried on Christian soil, If she were indeed a witch they wouldn’t have let her body be buried there. Even though the witch trials happened centuries before her time, people still held onto those beliefs.

Whatever this woman really did led people to dirty her name and movies bank off of it and make it worse. Chances are she was hated for being different, and anything you did made you a witch and even if she was one (because there is nothing wrong in that) I don’t think there’s any proof she was an evil one.

•BOB THE BONE FINDER

•Sam hates the woods and Colby hates bridges

•Josh is an adorable Jersey Devil 😌

• Snakes showing up outta nowhere got me saying “Nope Fuck that”

• “Dude, and there’s BATS!” Ain’t nothin’ but a sky puppy, Colby. 🥰

• “Perfect setting for us to die” “Oh god no we are not going to do that again, because we might actually die here”

•Colby saying he’d never leave her behind was just Awh

•Colby: Walk the beam I haven’t done gymnastics since the third grade!

Josh: Dang, Good luck bro.

Seth: You were a gymnast, Colby?

Colby: Fuck yeah bro. I can do the splits on anything!

Sam: O-On On anything, or? 😳

Incorrect quote to appease the Solby gods Colby: On that ass 😏

• Sam choosing the right way was adorable and shows he has a very good intuition.

•Colby making an angry face and Sam leaning on him to make him laugh with “Fat nutties” while also stuttering (flashback to that car video if you know you know) was extremely fucking cute and my Solby feels are flying.

• Also the fact Colby didn’t laugh at Sam for stuttering and was just casually still playing mad, was very cute because it shows he cares so much about Sam and Sam might have issues with stuttering that Colby doesn’t find funny. 🥰

• That pentagram is inverted which does mean evil.

•Yes double Estes

• It was heart wrenching the way Sam shot up over hearing Colby’s name and Colby said Sam’s name in such a painful way.

• Their going in alone guys! Woooooooo

•The I love you exchanges 😌🙌🏻

• “What if we stayed the night at the Stanley Hotel”okay yes hyped hyped! “But we bring Amanda.”

WHY?

Why do you have to always bring Amanda? She is a bad vibe con artist, she brings nothing to the videos with her classic “I was just about to say that!” being about the only thing she says. Honestly I push through for SnC and the others they bring with them, but Amanda is just sucking the joy from the videos like a vampire who doesn’t know how to read the room or when they’ve over stayed their welcome and won’t leave.

•Neck touching ghosts

• Confused R2-D2

• “Uh uh!” Colby, mood

• I love when Sam and Colby are alone ghost hunting because their excitement to catching stuff is adorable.

• The fact a full body was in that window is unnerving, whatever it was drained Sam’s walkie and was being a huge stalker.

• Sam and Colby being worried about each other durning the end 🥺 We Stan in this house. 🙌🏻

• I’d love to see them do more videos with just themselves, just maybe no more listening to Amanda’s about stuff that could put them at risk. Give us an xplr duo vid please.

[tedisnotdead]

The water flow stopped, and Andrew sighed, picking up the towel. He looked at himself in the mirror, his eyes scanning across the plain chest and stopping before his view reached his elbows.

"Andrew?" a voice called from the other side of the door, startling him. Andrew took a quick breath, closing his eyes before sighing, reminding himself of where he was. Renee's bathroom. Allison was downstairs, probably preparing baby Seth to stand in the crowd with her. "Nicky just left me your clothes. Do you want me to leave them in the spare room for you?"

"Yess." Andrew replied, looking down and pulling his boxers on. "I'll be out in a second." He reached for the armbands, pulling them on and tucking his thumb into the holes before walking out.

Betsy, Nicky and Erik were changing at home. They didn't need the preparation like the twins did, they wouldn't get picked. Jesse was safe too, wrapped up between his dads but next year he wouldn't. Next year he would be up there, and Andrew couldn't save him. Andrew had already felt the guilt of the six years he missed protecting his cousin and the four years he missed with his brother.

When they were united two years ago, it was a shock to everyone around them. Andrew had been in Betsy's care his entire life before then, with help from Renee for a few years during his more rebellious phase. When Renee started her fighting lessons twelve years ago, he was one of the firsts to sign up. Eight years after Andrew signed up, another Andrew signed up. Renee knew it wasn't him. And she mentioned it to Betsy, who connected the fourteen-year olds and since took them both in, alongside their cousin. A year later, Nicky introduced his boyfriend and his son to the family, and they were welcomed with open arms.

Betsy took two-week-old Andrew in from the day she saw him left on the side of the work field, wrapped in only a blanket. She took him home, where eight-year-old Renee was waiting. She hadn't been ditched like Andrew, she has been unfortunately orphaned by a factory malfunction and lost her mother at only six.  

Renee and Andrew grew up alongside each other, but when she left for the games at age thirteen, they knew they would never be the same. Renee came back a victor, that's when she started her fighting lessons. Betsy advised against it but saw her development and let her work. When Andrew questioned her why she let her fight after she had won, Betsy reminded him Renee had won for a reason.

That's when he met Wymack. David Wymack, the winner of the forty-third Hunger Games. David Wymack, the man who relied on the pain of tattoos to give him a mental escape from the pain that the Games had caused him. The same David Wymack who took Jean Moreau out of Betsy's care less than a week after she took him in.  

"Just because Jean was taken in by the Wymacks, it doesn't mean that you're not wanted." Betsy would always say. She would say the same thing every time she took one kid into her home and then they were taken in by a family a few days after. "You are just as valid. You are just as special. You just need to wait for your special time to shine."

Eight years passed and Aaron appeared. They united, Nicky was introduced, and Betsy took them all in. Betsy introduced them to Wymack, who introduced them to his kids and the Boyds. Befriending the entire of the Victors Village was a kick in the guts to Andrew. A reminder how he wasn't special, how he was basically nothing in comparison to some people.

Jean remembered him though. Jean made him feel special way. Not a romantic or sexual thing. Andrew knew those. Well, he knew sexual. He knew from all the hook-ups behind the factories, he knew from the nights he stayed at Roland's, a classmate in Renee's fighting class, and experimented with things. He knew from the start he was gay, but never said it out loud. He wasn't too confident when it came to romantic feelings however, but he had an idea.  

Jean Moreau-Wymack was his first and only friend. Renee accepted this, seeing how they're bond was more sibling like than friends. Jean joined him on the tree searched. Andrew taught him to climb quick, how to spot the nests quickly, how to remove both wasp and birds safely. In return, Jean baked him sweet goods. The banana breads and cakes and muffins rolled through the door daily, Jean delivering them every morning with a small smile. Occasionally, Jean would bake with exotic flavors that David Wymack brought back from his annual visits to the Capitol.

With all the time Andrew had started spending Jean, Aaron began spending it with the other child in the Wymack household. Kevin Wymack-Day. David's biological child from a woman he didn't meet again after their one-night stand.

When Kayleigh, Kevin's mother, passed Kevin had been put in the custody of David. Jean, Kayleigh's other child, had been given to Betsy to be cared for. David hunted him down and took him in, not having the heart to separate the kids.

Aaron and Kevin clicked the second they met. Both being insufferable, obsessive assholes in Andrew's opinion (and Jean's, but that was one of the secrets between the two that were shared in the tops of trees over a muffin each). Aaron's obsession laying in the profession of David's wife, Abby Wymack. One of the best doctors in District 7. Since Aaron became closer with her, he became more obsessed over the profession and soon, if he survived the final reaping, would become her apprentice. Kevin's obsession laid in a Capitol sport, Exy. Whenever his father visited the Capitol for the games, he would bring back his son merchandise of his favorite teams. David had a friend in the Capitol who recorded every game so he could take them home and Kevin could watch them.

Andrew reached the spare room and froze before remembering where he was. Renee's house. Aaron was at the Wymacks', using their shower like Andrew was using Renee's. He knew the only reason was to see Kevin, and 'secretly' say goodbye and good luck in their own special way.

Their attraction to each other was not unknown, practically everyone knew. But it was obvious they were waiting until Aaron's last reaping, until today, to make anything exclusive. As long as they snuck out of the Victors Village before anyone began to head to the town center, no one would notice the luxurious treatment the twins were getting.

The clothes were spread out, waiting on the spare room bed. Nicky's old black, short sleeved button up shirt and a pair of Erik's old, tight fit, wash jeans. A pair of old boots that Betsy had managed to afford where on the floor, with a pair of Allison's bright pink socks laying neatly in the neck of the boot.  

"You'll need to be ready in a few minutes Andrew." Renee's voice filtered through the door again. "The ceremony starts in an hour. People begin to move soon." Her footsteps echoed down the corridor as she left and Andrew looked at the clothes, sighing.

◒◓◒◓◒

Andrew stepped out, seeing Kevin and Aaron talking through a gap in the curtains. He sat back, waiting silently and watched them argue.  

"They're horrible." Jean mumbled, sitting next to Andrew on the wall, leaving a large enough space for Capitol's largest man to sit between them. "Kevin kicked me out so I couldn't hear. I think they're talking about their latest hook-up." He took a bite from a muffin, leaving one on the wall beside Andrew. "It was at ours while we were climbing. I think they think we're fucking."

"How disappointed will they be when they find out we don't fuck; we talk shit about them and stuff our faces with shit." Andrew mumbled and Jean giggled, taking another bite. "Truth for a truth?" Jean nodded. "I'm nervous."

"That's well justified." Jean said. "Your name is at the highest chance it's ever been, and ever will be. But some people do sadly have their names in there more than you. So, the chance it being you is low. And the chance it's Aaron is even lower, since your name is still in there from the past years of tesserae. "Jean sighed. "I'm gay. I think." Jean mumbled before looking over.

"Want another round?" Andrew asked and Jean stopped before nodding. He took another bite of his muffin, looking forward again. "I'm gay too." Andrew said, picking his muffin up. "I've known for a few years."

"I have a crush on Jeremy." Jean said. Andrew turned to him, raising an eyebrow. "The baker's son. I used to talk to him a lot when I lived with Kayleigh. She would let me pick up her weekly orders from the bakery and I would pay them with grain and milk. I used to talk to Jeremy every Sunday, and that's why I like baking. Because I like Jeremy. "

Andrew looked back through the window, seeing them still talking. Aaron seemed more angry than usual during their 'conversations'. "You should offer to work there." Andrew suggested. "You could see him more."

Jean laughed, looking down before taking the final bite. "I could, but who would you hang out with then? You haven't got any other friends." "I have Jesse." Andrew said, taking a bite. "This is good. What flavor is it?"

"It's another new one from the Capitol called Palmetto. It's basically a super sweet blood orange." Jean said. "And Jesse doesn't count. He's got school you know."

"I'll teach him then." Andrew argued, his eyes following Jean as the older boy got up and started pacing. "I remember all my lessons. I could teach him with no struggle." Jean snorted, looking up. "Shouldn't you be getting ready?"

"Kicked out remember?" Jean mumbled, looking back at Andrew. Andrew shrugged, taking another bite from his muffin and Jean laughed. "I should. Aaron seems to be done in the shower, so if I go straight up Kev probably won't care." Andrew nodded, taking another bite quickly. "I need to, don't I?" Andrew nodded again. "I'll see you after. Good luck Andrew." Jean turned to walk back.

"Jean." Andrew said and he stopped, turning. "If I get picked, don't be nervous to say goodbye."

Jean knew that was Andrew asking him to come. But Andrew didn't like asking. Andrew didn't want to ask, say the word please. It wasn't how Andrew worked, and Jean knew that. He never questioned why, but he knew that. He never pressed any questions when it came to Andrew, because Andrew never did the same to him. He never questioned the scars on his cheek or the roughness of his hands or the burn marks that Jean turned up with.

"I will." Jean said, smiling gently. "I hope you enjoyed the muffin! If I do need to visit you, I'll bring one along. A parting gift." He laughed before walking inside.

Andrew watched the door for a few seconds after it closed before moving his glance to the gap in the curtains. Their argument went on for a few more minutes until Aaron looked out the window. Andrew raised an eyebrow and Aaron sighed, turning back to Kevin and saying something before leaving.

"Trouble in paradise?" Andrew muttered when Aaron reached his side.

"Shut up." Aaron muttered, already towards the village entrance.

He was dressed in a tight red shirt, it looked like Kevin's with the way it was too tight around his waist but loose around the arms, and a pair of trousers which were too torn to belong to a victor, and the style choice only pointed to Nicky. Too tight around the thighs with baggy bottoms. Just how Erik liked it.

"He just wanted to wish me good luck and I wanted to thank him, or tell him to thank his dad, for letting me use their shower."

"Wish you good luck with a massive smooch." Andrew said, walking after him.

"As if you and Jean weren't doing the same." Aaron muttered, scowling at him.

"Jean was actually just telling me about his crush. I got a name and everything. It was glorious." Andrew said. As Aaron went to ask, Andrew continued, "But I will not be saying anything about the mystery person. It was in our game, and I never tell secrets from our game."

"You're stupid shitty 'Truth for a truth' game?" Aaron asked and Andrew nodded. "I don't know why you two play that. It's not even a game, its talking. Like normal people do. You and Jean are weird."

"I think Jean is smarter than you when it comes to most things." Andrew mumbled, pushing the gate at the end of the pathway open. Nicky looked up through the window, smiling when he saw the twins. "If him being weird is the consequence of that, I don't think he minds.  

"Fucking weirdo." Aaron muttered, pushing past. Nicky immediately fussed over him, asking where the shirt he left out was. Erik moved closer to Andrew, holding Jesse in his arms.

"I have missed you." Erik said.  

"Jesse." Andrew called and the young boy looked over. "Want to hug?" Jesse nodded excitedly. Erik squatted down, letting Jesse run over. But just before he reached Andrew, he slowed down and then calmly wrapped his arms around Andrew's waist. "Oh Andrew, you look amazing." Nicky whispered. "I wish Betsy could see you before the ceremony, but she's already gone to get the other kids ready." He stood up, smiling. "You both look amazing. And we are going to get through this, and we are going to come home and be calm and happy."

His smile faltered for a second, but he plastered it back on before Aaron could notice. Erik and Andrew did, but both decided to stay quiet, knowing he was trying his hardest.

"Andrew, are you sure you don't want to move to a factory job with me and Aaron? You could watch the games."

"I'm fine being a clearer." Andrew mumbled. "I get good pay and I only have to talk to Jean. I see no flaws."

"But you can't watch the games." Nicky said.

"Erik doesn't like to watch the games. Neither do I." Andrew said, looking down at Jesse, who had buried his face in Andrew's side. "I am happy getting the updates from you over dinner."

Nicky went to say something, but Erik stepped forward and whispered into his ear. Nicky sighed, looking at him. Erik pecked his lips softly.

"We should get going, though," Andrew said, pushing Jesse back lightly and holding his hand out. Jesse smiled widely, taking his hand and holding tightly, as if his life depended on it.

The walk to the town center was mostly fully of Nicky's nervous rambling, with Erik and Aaron occasionally responding. But Andrew ignored them and chose to focus on the small tune Jesse was humming, squeezing his hand along to the beat.

When they reached the town center, Erik picked Jesse back up. Jesse waved to Andrew sadly before his dad carried him off, holding Nicky's hand. They passed the peacekeepers and stood in the crowd beside Jean and Kevin. Andrew took off down the silent path, leading them to the identification tables.

He could see over the peacekeepers' shoulders, David, Matt and Renee lined up along the back of the stage, with their escort, Kathy Ferdinand, standing in front of them. She was talking animatedly to them, with her big blonde hair and eyes practically painted with pink. The skin-tight pink leather dress clung to her to an uncomfortably revealing extent where Andrew had to look away.

"Next." The peacekeeper said and Andrew looked up, seeing Aaron's whole-body flinch. "Go through. Next."

Andrew stepped forward, holding his hand forward. The peacekeeper grabbed his wrist roughly, tugging it forward and pricking the end of his finger. They then pressed it to the paper, scanned it and let him through.

Andrew rushed through, pushing through all the crowds to find his brother. Aaron was waiting nervously, wringing his wrists. Andrew pushed through the crowd until he ended up besides his brother, waiting silently.

"What if we get picked?" Aaron whispered, looking at his brother. Andrew shrugged, keeping his eyes focused on the stage. "Andrew I'm serious." he said before his voice was drowned out by Kathy tapping the microphone.

"Welcome, welcome." she said, smiling at everyone.

The neon yellow contacts she wore made everyone unsettled, but she continued, her cat-like eyes scanning the crowd.

"Welcome to the fifty seventh Hunger Games. May the odds be ever in your favor." She smirked, looking across to the group of people who weren't being reaped, taunting them. "Now, the time has come for us to select one courageous young man and women for the honor of representing district seven in this year's Hunger Games." She stopped for a second, smiling. "As usual, ladies first."

She shuffled across the stage in her overly tight dress and waved her hand over the bowl. A hand skimmed Andrew's wrist and he looked down, seeing Aaron's beside his, the knuckles brushing the black cloth. Andrew slid his hand into his brothers as Kathy waddled back to the microphone.

"Marissa Goodman." Kathy read out, looking across the crowd. People were stepped aside two sections before the twins.

Sixteen years old, Andrew told himself. The girl stepped forward, dressed in a light green dress which skimmed her knees and her hair tied into a tight ponytail.

"Come on up dear, don't be afraid." Four peacekeepers surrounded her, leading her up to the stage. Marissa slowly walked up, and Kathy enthusiastically welcomed her. "And now the boys."

Aaron's grip tightened on his hand as she reached the glass bowl. Kathy smiled, waving her hand around the top before diving in and pulling out one white slip. She slowly shuffled back to the microphone and leant close, undoing the slip slowly. She smirked before reading, "Aaron Michael Minyard."

"I volunteer as tribute." Andrew looked down before he even had acknowledged the words come out of his mouth. He looked back up, seeing everyone staring at him. Aaron was looking at him with tearful eyes.

"Not Andrew." he whispered, but Andrew pushed past. "No. Andrew stop!" he shouted, following him through. Andrew took his place in between the peacekeepers but was dragged back violently. "I won't let you do this." Aaron shouted.

"I volunteer." Andrew repeated, making direct eye contact with Aaron. Aaron shook his head, his mouth opening and closing until the first tear rolled down his cheek and his grip on Andrew's arm loosened.  

Aaron was pulled back quickly, and Andrew recognized the hand around his twin's shoulders immediately. Jean pulled Aaron back, avoiding Andrew's eye. Andrew turned around and followed the peacekeepers down the aisle. Renee was staring at him, shocked, from the back of the stage. Matt's eyes were filled with tears, while Wymack's jaw was clenched.  

Andrew didn't remember as far back as to when he was four, but he knew Wymack's story.

Wymack had trained as hard as he could after losing a close friend to the games when he was twelve. When David turned eighteen, he volunteered himself before the name was even called out. His reasoning was to save one more helpless kid from being killed in his district. This caused him to become a fan favorite in the Capitol, and a respected citizen in the district. In every shop, I have had a discount. Everyone smiled at him in the streets. Everyone welcomed him into their homes and invited him round for dinner.

Every year, when the victors returned, all three of the victors visited the houses of the fallen tributes to mourn with them for one night. They supplied the family with the food for the night and left them all the leftovers. It was a tradition started by Wymack, but when Renee won the forty-fourth Hunger Games, she joined in. And when Matt won the fifty-first Hunger Games, he became the final part of the trio.

Andrew was snapped out of his thoughts when he reached the bottom of the stairs, looking up at the stage. He made eye contact with Renee, who smiled gently at him. He sighed before walking up.

"A volunteer!" Kathy cried, holding her hand out to showcase Andrew's arrival. "Now, what's your name young man?"

"Andrew Joseph Minyard." Andrew said, looking forward.

Jean was finally looking at him, his face contorted with fear. Nicky was beside him, crying into Erik's shoulder. Erik was staring at Andrew in fear while Jesse sobbed, bundled in Betsy's arms. Aaron was crying, while being held back by Kevin.  

"Oh, and was that your brother I picked?" Kathy asked, smiling widely.

"Yes, my twin brother." Andrew answered, trying to keep his voice monotone.

"How lovely." Kathy said before turning to the crowd again. "Here we are. Our tributes from district seven!" She started clapping, but everyone stayed silent.

Jean brought three fingers up to his lips before raising them above his head. Slowly, everyone around him began to do the same, the gesture spreading among the crowd. A single tear rolled down Jean's scarred cheek and Andrew took a deep breath before bringing three fingers to his own lips then raising them above his head.

"Happy Hunger Games!" Kathy cried, "And may the odds be ever in your favor."

They turned away, Kathy leading them both to the door at the back. Andrew flinched away from her touch, overtaking Marissa and pushing himself into the corridor.

"Andrew." Renee said, walking up to him.

"Not." Andrew spat out through gritted teeth.

He would not let himself cry; he would not let himself cry.

"We can talk on the train. I want to say goodbye to them."

[whumpsday]

OKAY OKAY WAIT HOLD ON. okay so kane wouldnt be starving, that is correct, but i feel like if seth wanted to force him to watch pumpkin be hurt, he would restrain him Very Well. w lots of silver. so he cant just lunge at him, but instead he has some time to calm down before he makes a horrible mistake! also i just like kane feeding on pumpkin A Lot, so im thinking of ways where he can do that but still be a little starved, and i just thought abt seth literally opening his throat up so the blood flows right out instead of in his tummy..... AND THAT WAY ITD BE A VALID CONCERN OF PUMPKIN'S THAT HE MIGHT GO OVERBOARD IN HIS DESPERATION TO GET SOME BLOOD PROPERLY INTO HIS SYSTEM......

as for the name, im gonna be honest im pretty sure seth would just call him leech. BUT CANDY KANE OMG JDKSKSKSK THATS SO GOOD IM CRYING. ADORABLE. but unfortunately seth wouldnt care enough abt his original name :( WAIT WAIT WAIT I CAN IMAGINE PUMPKIN COMING UP W THAT...... they would absolutely make sure to (very quietly bc fuck if seth heard them he might be rly angry) call him kane all the time so he doesnt feel like his name was taken from him :D i can also imagine pumpkin calling him sir accidentally.

also i have this image of pumpkin falling asleep on kane, or like, in his lap, and kane staying up to watch over them and make sure theyre okay and also make sure to avoid doing anything that could scare them so as not to shatter this new and fragile trust between them..... for some reason it makes me think of someone falling asleep in the embrace of a huge and venomous snake. yes it is safe bc no one would go near the snake. but the snake could also just tighten their body a bit and break bones and kill them :) it makes me cry a little to imagine kane being SO GENTLE w them. so so so gentle.

AND YES OMG PUMPKIN ABSOLUTELY WOULD TEACH HIM,,,, OLD MAN.... hehehehehe they would show him funny and cute pics all the time and let him read stories w them and maybe even let him send some asks- they would show him seth's blog and all the drabbles that were based on their torture w this weird sense of pride. they would hide the ones that were abt kane..... bc they wouldnt wanna make him sad :( or make him relive those :(

jsyk i have been rotating this crossover in my mind literally all day

ooooh seth is SMART.

before kane was with seth he was COMPLETELY starved with zero blood for years, so even with that horrific method, he would still feel grateful for being allowed to feed even a little bit. he would be very, very careful not to take too much.

kane would be touched by pumpkin making an effort to call him his real name, especially since kane hates being called leech and it makes him scared. pumpkin would have to explain what a candy kane is (kane doesn't know human foods) but he would think the nickname is sweet, coming from them. he would ask for their original name to return the gesture, which i assume pumpkin would decline.

pumpkin calling him sir would make him feel GUILTY AS HELL because it just reminds him of how cruel he was to jim. he might even refuse to feed for a day if pumpkin called him sir (assuming he is fed well-enough to not be super desperate, i assume he's like half-starved most of the time with seth)

YESSS PUMPKIN FALLING ASLEEP ON KANE IS SO CUTE.... he would try so so hard to be so so gentle. he's really, really trying to turn over a new leaf and he cares about pumpkin very much. they're his only friend.

kane would love being shown funny & cute pics and reading stories :) he would absolutely NOT be into whump though. he gets enough of that shit irl. he would want to read stuff as far removed as possible, for escapism. he would be kind of disturbed by how pumpkin is proud of the stories about seth torturing them, but he would try not to show it because he doesn't want to upset them. if kane sent asks he could sign with the 🧛 emoji :) i imagine this would be pumpkin's idea, lol

[lampmeeting]

D for Charles/Magnus, I for Magnus/Toki, L for Charles/Pickles, and F for Melm/JT.

eeehEHEHEHE DILF *rubs my little hands together* don't mind if i do~

D for Drunken Love Confession - Charles/Magnus

pre-klok. :') magnus has been chipping away at charles' resolve. there's just something about the bookish, put-together little chuck offdensen that makes magnus wanna break through all his defenses and see him come undone. he always did like a challenge. they have heated, passionate debates about the direction of the band. they get in each other's faces. magnus even kissed him once, but charles pushed him away, furious and blushing, and demanded he leave his office.

after six months of this weirdly charged back-and-forth they have, the band invites charles to come drinking with them to celebrate pickles' birthday. charles declines, concerned they're just inviting him to come because they want someone else to play designated driver. but magnus intervenes like "nah i'm driving tonight, promise. so go nuts." and charles seems to think it over... and eventually agrees.

so they all go out! at first charles seems to be pacing himself, but pickles gets shots, and it's all downhill from there. magnus, staying dutifully sober, watches the rest of the band + charles get sloppy and silly, not minding in the slightest the way charles leans against him a little in the booth and touches him when he laughs. he starts to regret not getting drunk himself, but he'd promised charles. it's enough just to see charles' mask slip, albeit not quite in the way magnus wanted. but he'll take it for now.

at the end of the night, magnus drops the band off at the apartment and then continues on to charles' place. he pulls up, and charles tries to get out of the car, but stumbles and falls. he's a lot more fucked up than magnus suspected. magnus helps him to the door, but charles seriously looks like he's about to black out, so he takes him inside, cleans him up a little, and puts him to bed (on his side, in the recovery position, he knows the drill). before he leaves, he can't help himself... he runs fingers through charles' sweaty hair and strokes his jaw. charles opens his eyes, seeming surprised that magnus is still there, and then... he smiles at him. a genuine smile. and as his eyes close again, he whispers something that freezes magnus in place.

"...mmfm...mmlove you..."

"...what?"

but charles is under again, and magnus leaves in a panic. charles doesn't, can't, have feeling for him. that's too much. magnus just wanted some fun, right? maybe get charles worked up enough for an angry fuck. but...love?

magnus can't sleep. the next time magnus sees charles, charles pulls him aside. "i apologize that you had to babysit me like that the other night. i can't exactly recall everything that happened, so if i said or did anything, ah...embarrassing, i'm very sorry."

so charles doesn't remember what he said. or he does and he's just trying to save face. magnus should be relieved about this, but for some reason his heart feels suddenly sore...

"oh, yeah, no...you were out like a light. don't worry about it."

--

I for "Idiots in Love" - Toki/Magnus

post-post-galaktikon. weirdly enough i'd probably write this from like nathan's pov or something. he's having everyone over to the house for some reason, maybe a holiday or his daughter's first birthday or something (her cool uncles wouldn't dream of missing it). this means..... rrugghhgh magnus is coming over. it's the first time he's interacted with magnus since pickles and charles' wedding, so maybe a good couple years, and he's not looking forward to it.

everyone arrives. toki and magnus are the last to show up, and nathan has to do a double-take because this is SO not magnus. half his hair is back in a ponytail, he's let his beard grow in some, and he's wearing a sweater?? and he's smiling? he genuinely seems happy to see nathan, gives him a hug, says a warm hello to abby.

over the course of the afternoon nathan has to keep looking at him and reminding himself that's magnus fucking hammersmith because he's just so... animated? friendly? he's sitting next to toki and they're holding hands, and when others are talking the two of them are making eyes at each other and cuddling and laughing at little things they seem to be sharing between themselves. they're being a couple of absolute goofballs together, and honestly it's a bit sickening to watch. is magnus just faking this?

at some point nathan excuses himself to the kitchen for something, and while he's in there he's joined by magnus, considerably more subdued.

"sorry, man, i just...i thought maybe we could talk for a sec."

so they talk. they catch up a little. nathan learns magnus has been hitting the therapy especially hard over the past year, making some meaningful strides. it's not an act, he's genuinely happier now. or at least trying to be.

"i mean, you know how it is, nate, right? doesn't abby make you wanna be better just because she exists and she loves you?"

okay, nathan can understand that. he still doesn't understand... them. but it really seems like magnus has turned a corner, which... good for him, he supposes. as long as he's treating toki well.

when they return to the party, nathan watches magnus sit back down with toki and give him a kiss like he'd been gone all month, and they giggle to themselves again. this time, it seems...all right.

--

L for "Love at First Sight" - Charles/Pickles

i'm gonna flip the script here!! i've already done the whole "charles sees pickles on stage and goes gaga for him" twice now... so i'd pull away from the 80s and do a fic where they actually did meet for the first time in the mid-90s when pickles was in dethklok.

so they've got their shitty original manager (the one from doomstar) still, and he's just not pulling his weight. he's managing a few other bands and his heart isn't in dethklok the way it used to be. pickles is worried they're stagnating, and when he learns that it's been magnus lately making sure they get booked, that's the last straw. they all come together, and they tell the dude to fuck off. but then this leaves them without a manager. magnus offers, but pickles has already been wary about how possessive magnus seems about the band recently, so when pickles says no the rest of them vote the same.

pickles blows through his old contacts looking to dig up some manager from his past who can either wants to manage dethklok or has connections to someone else. no dice. skwisgaar comes up with no one. magnus is still trying to campaign for himself. shit gets dire when somehow seth finds out dethklok is lacking management and leaves pickles a voicemail offering his "valuable fuckin' services". pickles blows his fucking top, swearing and screaming. "HOW HARD IS IT TO FIND ONE GUY CAPABLE OF MANAGING A FUCKIN' BAND??"

the doorbell rings, and pickles, still raging, throws it open.

"WHAT??"

"ahh!"

it's just... a dude. like a normal-ass dude. glasses. a nice dress shirt and slacks. nice hair. handsome. he's nervous as shit, but that almost makes him more handsome.

"i, ah...i-i was told that van on the street belongs to, ah...to someone here? i clipped the, ah, the bumper. just a little. but it's noticeable."

anger forgotten, pickles just... stares at him. are his eyes green or brown? and that jawline...

the man shifts his weight just a bit, peeking into the apartment with wide, curious eyes. "sorry, that, ah... that's quite the drum kit."

"huh?" pickles looks back at it and steps inside, and the man follows as if he's simply meant to be there. "oh, yeah, thanks. you play?"

"hardly. a small jazz kit in college for a friend's music project but it, ah, obviously didn't go anywhere." the man glances around and seems to realize that he's just waltzed inside. "right, ah, so about the van--" he pulls out his card. charles f. offdensen of finch & associates. an honest-to-god lawyer. huh. so he's a smart guy. good-looking to boot. knows a bit about music, apparently. and he's looking to make things right about hitting the van...

pickles smiles, hearts in his eyes. "ya like metal, charlie?"

--

F for "Fake Dating" - Melmord/Twinkletits

aaahahah... okay. so, this would be when melm is living with john as part of his continued therapy. a few months pass, and they've actually become good friends, melm thinks, not just therapist and patient. it's nice living there with john.

and then, john gets a call from his ex-wife, joy. she's in town, and she wants to come over for dinner one night before she leaves. the only thing is, she's got her new fiance in tow. she and john ended on pretty mutual terms, so there's really no bitterness there, but even so, john knows it's going to be an unpleasant evening. and then there's the question of what to do about melmord.

"you can just stuff me in a back room and pretend i don't exist. i'll be real quiet."

"absolutely not, you've been watching too many sitcoms."

"excuse you, that's jane eyre."

john just doesn't exactly know how to approach explaining melmord's presence in the house. because he knows joy, and joy will ask.

"tell her i'm a friend who needed a place to crash?"

"joy knows i don't do friends anymore."

ouch go melm's feelings.

"well, uh... you could just tell her the truth? that i'm your patient and i live with you?"

john pulls a face. "absolutely not."

in a flash of sitcom inspiration, melm snaps his fingers. "i got it! i'm your boyfriend! we'll pretend to date!"

"pretend to--?? mel, honey, no. okay? i understand you're trying to help, but--"

"but what? what's your brilliant idea, doc?"

cut to john introducing melmord to his ex-wife.

"and this is my... well, he's uh, my boyfriend actually. my boyfriend melmord."

melm is all smiles as he leans in and takes joy's hand. "please, just call me mel."

and then of course at the end of a long night, joy and her fiance leave, and john and melm pat each other on the back for a job well done. they really gave it their all, put on a convincing performance full of long embraces and doting glances and romantic touches. neither of them really want to talk about how easily it came to them, and how unwilling they both are to bring it to an end.

"well, uhh... good night, then." john chuckles. "darling."

"yeah, haha, sleep good, uh... sugarbear."

they laugh. they're standing in the hall laughing. they should really move apart from each other and go to their respective rooms if they're going to sleep, but they're not moving. and they're still laughing. and now melmord is touching john's shirt, fingering a button, and john has a hand on melm's hip...

"maybe," melm says quietly, "we can just pretend for, like... a little longer?"

[palmett-hoes]

how do you think this fandom deals with "measuring" trauma? i've seen a couple posts detailing aaron's reaction to trauma/nicky's reaction//seth's/etc and it seems like some people have a tier list of trauma responses in regards to the foxes? like what's "acceptable" versus what isn't, and who's trauma was "enough" to make their actions excusable versus others. this doesn't make much sense but i hope you get where i'm coming from?

no no i get you don't worry

i think it’s something i used to see more said explicitly than i see it now. like i definitely remember a point in the fandom when ppl were very openly mad at aaron for the way he acted in the books and especially him not being “grateful” enough for all that andrew had “done for him.” additionally seth used to be used as a minor villain or an abusive ex in fics a lot more than i see now. then of course there was a period of calling out these trends and reminding ppl that these are books about trauma, not books about ethics, and that you really really can’t read them without attempting compassion for every character. they’re not books about who’s right and who’s wrong, they can’t really be read in terms of theory or ideology. they’re about survival and recovery.

i haven’t really seen those sentiments in the past few years tho, at least not as openly as they once were, nor have i seen the old posts recirculating. at the same time, i think that there’s less meta and character analysis being written in general so there’s also less debate in general. i don’t see the whole fandom tho, just who i follow and the stuff from the tags that shows up on my tl. if this stuff is actively still going on idk about it, though i’d like to think we as a collective have moved on from seeing trauma as a zero-sum game

additionally, because of the discourse period over them it seems like aaron and seth in particular are treated with extra care not to invalidate that they came from abusive situations and were shaped by that. i’d say it’s now seen as bad taste to openly denounce what a character has been through as “not enough”

however

measuring trauma isn’t always angry, it isn’t always saying to a character “you didn’t go through enough” or “he went through more so shut up.” measuring trauma can also be dismissive. it can take the form of simply choosing not to include it. of removing character traits or actions or topics that make us uncomfortable or are maybe complicated to approach. by removing them or replacing them or avoiding them and simply writing like they’re not there, you essentially get to the same place as saying “get over it” but instead you write them as having, well, gotten over it

so i do still see people measuring trauma it’s just not as outright anymore. instead it’s paring certain characters down for ease and digestibility, and simply not engaging with their trauma and circumstances

i would say i see this most often with the upperclassmen, dan, matt, and allison especially (and nicky even though he’s not an upperclassmen) (ik i mentioned him but seth content is still pretty few and far between) (renee’s trauma has the “rule of cool” so it still gets in there). i’ve mentioned before how sidelined the upperclassmen are in fan works and some of the unfortunate implications of that, but another dimension is not acknowledging or considering their individual backgrounds. they all come from some pretty fucked up circumstances and more than that they’re all SHAPED by those circumstances

in the books, they are all wary isolationists with attitude issues.  they can be mean, they can be nasty, and they can be violent. they come from poverty, abuse, neglect, drug addicition, gang violence, and sex trafficking. they are treated with extreme suspicion by their school, the media, their classmates, and their fellow athletes, and they respond with suspicion right back. their relationships with each other are often on thin ice. they treat neil the way they do - tolerate his puzzle pieces that don’t fit together right without questioning - because they can all recognize themselves in him. and on the flip side, neil is able to relate to them for the same reasons, because they are also wary dogs used to being hit

but then i so often see the upperclassmen used in ways that mostly imply they’re like,, mostly normal, chill, often quite woke. goofy and cool. they all grew up watching disney movies and going to carnivals. they get used as a contrast for neil and andrew to highlight their traumatized behavior and the extremity of their circumstances, and if their trauma gets mentionted at all it’s in passing and it doesn’t inform the way they act. their trauma isn’t sufficient to inform their actions so it just,, doesn’t factor in or get mentioned really and they’re all nice, friendly, happy-go-lucky neurotypicals who are trying to teach poor traumatized neil how to be normal. tell me that isn’t measuring trauma

it’s annoying, in all honesty, especially since it now seems to come in a form that’s hard to call out because it’s no longer content that actually states a bad opinion so much as it is a lack of content or consideration for certain characters, pushing them further and further into the background and giving them increasingly more vague, palatable, and relatable characterizations.

in fact, it often comes off as praise, by ascribing them positive traits like nicky being a good guardian for the twins or allison being super knowledgeable about lgbt stuff or dan being a “queen” or matt being a “himbo” and because this is all good stuff it’s fine, right? it’s better than canon actually, right? except actually what it is is dismissive of their trauma and individual experiences. it’s a series of easily digestible filler words used to make the messy, ugly, complicated characters of canon softer and easier to swallow

also this is by no means restricted to the upperclassmen it’s just the one that slips most through the cracks. i definitely see this happening to andrew, too, but it works in slightly different ways and is a whole other discussion

[whatmack]

Look all I’m saying is we were ROBBED of Seth and Renee interacting in the books. I think they’d have the most interesting dynamic.

! Ah!! Like, Seth is, in many of the most up-front ways, who Renee is trying not to be: he’s angry, he’s loud, he’s crude, he’s bigoted, he’ll punch you for looking at him funny....but yet there are a couple of things not so up-front (like him saving Allison from that party, in the ec) that you’re like. hm.  Whearas how Renee sees herself is: outwardly everyone thinks i’m good, but who I am quietly is a terrible person  (I don’t think she’s correct, but) I think it’d be interesting to see how they react to each other, you’re right. Would Seth be disparaging of Renee’s pacifism? I think so-- he seemed to have learned that the only way to not get run over is to cover yourself in spikes. Would Seth’s particular brand of anger-with-no-downtime-fuck-everyone-else be extra hard for Renee to be around, as someone so focused on keeping herself from being “””bad?”””” I think so too Renee’s morality is........interesting. She’s friends with the other Foxes, including Andrew, and though Andrew may be an extreme example all of the Foxes have had to do some Stuff(TM) to survive, and have the mental mechanisms to show it. Yet when it comes to herself, she seems to have such an.......unforgiving sense of right and wrong? It’s not uncommon for people to be harder on themselves than on others, but Renee’s insistance that she is, in fact, a bad person, despite all of the kind actions she’s taking, makes me worry about her. 

And I can see that kind of Judgement(TM) coming up hard against Seth’s so very outward fight-em-all attitude. Even if Renee said nothing to him, I can see him reacting to a percieved judgement, and that being good for nobody. Especially considering what we see/have learned about Seth’s relapse cycle! While Seth’s cycle is-- normal and expected, actually-- having the appearance of Renee’s “perfect” example (and then maybe how she doesn’t forgive herself despite that) could be a. Catalyst. For some. Tension.

[carbootsoul]

erika+ephriam+lyon for ask game 👀? and a witch hat character of your choosing if you like as well :3v

omg clint you're spoiling me :) also this is mostly unrelated but i was listening to kat flint today and a) her music is so good thank u for introducing it to me years ago and b) VERY witch hat atelier vibes which was fun. im putting my answers under a cut bc i am sooo verbose about characters

eirika: a song that reminds me of them: this is just the first that came to mind but oh what a world by rufus wainwright! oh what a world my parents gave me / always traveling but not in love. the rly interesting mix of idealism and pragmatism that she embodies- both being in awe of and in love with the world and the people in it but also not hesitating to accept that they are in a war and the tragedies that come with it what they smell like: i think for most of the game she smells like sweat and dirt an otp: eirika and l'arachel is actually the best ship in the whole entire world they're sooo funny. they keep meeting and every time eirika is like ???? and l'arachel is just falling head over heels in love a notp: eirika and lyon romance honestly very textually relevant in the game and adds to the story and whatever but they're both so absolutely homosexual that i can't conceptualize it favorite platonic/familial relationships: eirika and ephraim 🥺🥺 but also eirika and seth he's such a good big brother figure!! but also eirika and colm and eirika and tana and eirika and lyon. it's like.. rag tag army as family.. a headcanon that is popular in the fandom but that i disagree with: there are like two posts about her on tumblr dot com but her fire emblem heroes characterization makes me insane shut up about your brother shut up about your brother the position they sleep in: on her side one leg curled to her chest

ephraim a song that reminds me of them: omg lies by marina abt his relationship with lyon. you're too proud to say that you made a mistake / you're a coward till the end i really wish we had been able to see more of ephraims reaction to the true story of what happened with lyon, since he obviously forgives him but also seems to be angry about it and that's such a good dynamic. also oc can't let you go / i just want it to be perfect / to believe it's all been worth the fight. they make me... ugh what they smell like: he has also been living in tents for months so he probably also smells like horses and sweat an otp: ephraim and lyon do get to me... 🥺 also he and innes as a like teenage fling is hilarious to me they're so funny to each other i can't believe they don't have supports a notp: if i ever see another incest joke i'm killing someone favorite platonic/familial relationships: he and his sister are so good!! they're so siblings! a headcanon that is popular in the fandom but that i disagree with: again i have never rly interacted with the fe fandom but something from canon i disagree with is the assignment of the sun to him and the moon to his sister he is so obviously the lunar twin im furious abt this the position they sleep in: absolutely sprawled out. he takes up as much space as is given to him

lyon a song that reminds me of them: ache with me by against me just happened to be playing rn but it's very him. do you share the same sense of defeat / have you realized all the things you'll never be / ideals turn to resentment, open minds close up with cynicism / i've got no judgement for you / come on and ache with me. what they smell like: roses but in a fucked up revolutionary girl utena way like the roses symbolize something sinister an otp: lyon and ephraim.. admittedly lyon is kind of carrying why this ship is compelling with his tragic backstory but ephraim is such a boy so he's important too a notp: see eirika :/ favorite platonic/familial relationships: he and eirika and ephraim as a unit are so important to me they are so [unintelligible] a headcanon that is popular in the fandom but that i disagree with: i haven't rly seen this much but i guess any tendency to soft-boy him bc of his character design like this guy sucks a lot and he has a lot of flaws that almost ended the world :/ the position they sleep in: hugging a pillow

and for the wha character.. agott bc she's so girl :) a song that reminds me of them: pretty little things by the crane wives! but trust is now something i make people earn / so i'm not inclined to just give it away / to a pair of blue eyes with some nice things to say what they smell like: grass in the best way possible! an otp: she and coco are SO !! im in love with them. sasunaru dynamic but better in every way. all the panels of coco hugging or complimenting agott and agott blushing furiously are the new wonders of the world. shipping kids in media always feels a little weird but i think they're a rly cute like first crush dynamic a notp: i dont think she's been shipped with anyone else lol favorite platonic/familial relationships: agott and olruggio are rly interesting to me! i've probably just drawn lines between them because they're both grumpy but i could definitely see agott becoming for coco what olruggio is for qifrey and i love when children are friends with their adult narrative foil it's about helping the younger generation overcome the things that they couldn't! it's also about olruggio being able to connect with agott because they're both grumpy :) a headcanon that is popular in the fandom but that i disagree with: not a headcanon bc again the fandom is tiny but so much of her tag is ppl being mean to her about what she did in the second (?) volume like yeah that was mean but she's like 12! 12 year olds do fucked up stuff all the time they're still learning what interpersonal relationships are the position they sleep in: on her stomach clutching her pillow a crossover au i’d love to see them in: anything that would allow her to say swear words my favorite outfit they’ve ever worn: the like single panel where tetia is getting mad at her about not liking wearing costumes and it shows her dressed as a prince! she looks so good

djskflj i feel like i wrote a novel about each of them and tbh i do not know if u will make any sense out of it but thank u for sending this it was super fun to think about them for a while!!!

[captain-mcdavid]

word count: 2.6k

smut: yes | no

warnings: swearing, angst, mentions of a break in (tw)

It’s early morning when you finally drag yourself off the couch and to the bathroom. Your apartment is pitch black around you, and the clock on your counter reads 3:48. You peal off the outfit you wore to the bar, tossing the garments carelessly on the floor while you reach for the robe on the back of the door. The silk feels out of place on your sticky skin, but you tie it on anyway, eyes drifting up to your reflection for the first time since you stepped into the bathroom.

You look like a wreck. The mascara and eye shadow you put on earlier was not in it’s correct place, tears washing it to the tops of your cheeks. Hair a complete mess of tangles falling past your shoulders. It’s pathetic really, how upset you are, and how much it shows.

You should have seen it coming.

Slowly the makeup comes off, and the tangles come out, and the more normal you look, the more normal you feel. You finish off with some lavender lotion on your arms and neck, hoping the scent will make you tired, because at this point, you’re not sure if you’ll sleep at all.

You’re just about to head to the kitchen to make some tea when you hear the sound of your front door closing. You freeze in your place, stomach dropping to the floor. You can almost feel the color drain from your face, shaky hand reaching up to cover your mouth.

There’s a bang that follows, and an audible grunt while footsteps thud towards the living room.

You look around for something, anything that will help you in this situation, but there’s nothing, your phone is back in the living room, and there’s nothing that resembles a weapon anywhere.

Leaning out the doorway of the bathroom, you can’t see anyone down the hall, and the footsteps have stopped. Your eyes catch on the vase that sits on the side table in the hallway, and with a surge of confidence, you toe as quietly as you can out of the bathroom, clutching onto the vase like your life depends on it.

Your heart actually feels cold when you think about whoever the hell is in here with you having a weapon. If they have a knife, or heaven forbid a gun, the vase you’re holding isn’t gonna be near enough to stop them.

You near the end of the hallway, and your heart is pounding so fast and loud that you’re sure the intruder can probably hear it too. The foot steps start again, and as they get closer and closer you clutch the vase harder, tears spilling over your cheeks again while you listen carefully for the movements of the person.

They take one another step, and they’re so close now, so you listen for one more before turning the corner, clenching your eyes shut while you swing the vase blindly at whoever is there.

Your makeshift weapon doesn’t make contact with anything, it’s pulled from your hand while the intruder shouts, “What the fuck?”

You open your eyes as soon as you hear his voice, because you’d recognize it anywhere. He stares at you with wide eyes for a second, and you have to take him in slowly before you can let out the breathe you were holding, slumping exasperatedly with a choked noise as Josh shoves the vase onto the counter, lurching forward to crowd you into his chest. “Hey, hey- it’s just me!” He says, and you relax against him, letting out  a sob while you wait for the adrenaline to leave your system. “It’s just me, Y/N! I’m here, you’re safe,” He whispers, but you don’t quite believe it yet. “You’re safe,” He repeats, like he can sense your doubt.

“Fuck, I can feel your heart pounding,” He pulls you into him tighter, and you close your eyes, trying to slow your breathing, sucking in air until your shoulders rise. Josh rubs your back soothingly, and finally you feel your body start to relax. “You’re okay, you’re okay,”

His hand wanders up, smoothing your hair while he rests his cheek on the top on your head, and that’s when you finally have the mind to ask questions. You push him away forcefully while you look him up and down just to be sure, “What the hell are you doing, Josh? I thought I was about to fucking die,” You cry, and he takes another step forward, reaching out for you but you mimic him, stepping back just as quickly.

His shoulders fall the slightest bit, and he looks at his feet with a clenched jaw before speaking, “You could have, you left your door open. You need to be more careful,”

You scoff, pulling your robe tighter around yourself while you roll your eyes. “Quit mansplaining, that doesn’t give you the right to just walk in,”

“I knocked,” He fires back, and you just shake your head, “It was quiet, but I knocked.”

“Why are you here?”

“Cause I want to explain,” He says, and before you can jump in, he’s starting again, “Since this whole thing started neither one of us have stopped being angry long enough to let the other talk, and I think if we just listen to each other-,”

That’s where you cut him off. “I don’t want to talk. You’ve made it more than clear how you feel about me, I don’t need any explanations, I just want to move on,”

“Y/N. please, let’s just-,”

“No,” You cut him off for the second time and his fists ball up at his sides. “Seriously Josh, this is toxic. I’m mad at you, you’re mad at me, it’s never ending, and I can’t do it anymore,”

He mumbles something under his breath and you raise your eyebrows in question, wondering if you heard him right, “What did you say?”

This time he speaks louder, looking you dead in the eye. “It’s not you that I’m mad at.”

This pushes you over the edge, and he’s looking at you like you’re psycho because this sends you into full blown laughter. “Well, you could have fooled me! It sure seemed like you were mad when you fled the country after I went to Seth’s, and then yelled at me over the phone when I tried to tell you what happened,” Josh rolls his eyes and it fuels you to keep going, voice thick with sarcasm, “It also seemed like you were pretty mad when I left the bar with Seth too-,”

“Okay!” Josh finalizes, “Look, I didn’t come here to fight, honestly. I just wanna explain.”

You give him a weary look, and as much as you want to be strong and kick him out after all the shit he’s pulled, you find yourself wanting to give in. After all you’ve done some bad stuff too and you would have loved the opportunity to explain.

“I know you think I don’t care, but would I be standing here if I didn’t?”

After thinking carefully, you finally nod, and he sighs.

You end up on the couch, Josh extending his arm over the back while he takes a deep breathe, “So I guess I’ll just start from the beginning?” You nod, and he directs his eyes somewhere else while he clears his throat. “So Lindsay and I met like, I don’t know- two years ago maybe? It was like two or three months before I met you.” He says her name and all you can do is cringe, but you listen none the less, “We slept together a few times, but we were never together, I was seeing other people and I assumed she was too, but I don’t know she got a little crazy so I just stopped talking to her.”

That sounded familiar. Did you get a little crazy too? Is that what turned him off?

“Few months later I met you, and yeah, we had a good time, then we stopped talking, and the next time I saw the both of you was at the bar,”

It’s honestly comedic how he’s managing to make it sound like things ended seamlessly with the two of you. We stopped talking? You think to yourself. Nope, that was just you.

“To be honest that night I barely even paid attention to Lindsay, I knew she was there but I didn’t care, all I saw was you.”

You want to scoff at how cheesy that is, but you force yourself to stay silent, eyes falling to your lap as you try to process what he’s saying. “You’ve kind of always had that effect on me, honestly.” He says it bashfully, like he’s not comfortable with the words coming out of his mouth. “I know you’re not gonna believe me when I say this, but after we started up again I wasn’t seeing anyone else. And then that month came where you were gone, and it had been like three weeks since I’d seen you when Lindsay called. I shouldn’t have answered but I was feeling like shit, I thought you were done with me so I picked up, and she came over.”

You bite your lip, trying to blink away the images that are flashing through your head.

“I swear to god, the moment I hung up the phone, I knew I fucked up. I knew she was your friend and that it was wrong, and I was ready to tell her go home as soon as I opened the door, but she didn’t really take no for an answer. She said all sorts of things, she said you weren’t friends anymore and that you hadn’t talked in like weeks. She said she’d heard you’d moved on and were with some other guy, I don’t know all this shit, and the more she kept on going the more I felt like a total loser, and we ended up making out a little bit, and it almost went further, but I stopped it.”

Your eyes snap up at this, because you weren’t expecting that, the words falling out of your mouth in disbelief, “Wait, you didn’t sleep with her?”

He shakes his head, and you feel like a weight should be lifted of your shoulders, but there’s nothing.

“I told her to leave, and she was pissed but she went home. And that’s when she left her jacket. And then you came over like a week later, and we started hanging out again and it was the same as before, I was just focused on you. I had completely forgotten about Lindsay. And then came Boone’s party, and I saw the two of you come in together, with your other friend and I kind of panicked. I avoided you almost the entire night because I didn’t want to see Lindsay. So then when we went up into Boone’s room I followed, and I let you lie because I didn’t want you to know that I had seen you earlier. I was watching you talk to Seth, and you were laughing, and I don’t know, fuck, it made me so nervous because you ghosted me for like a month, and seeing you with Seth just made me insecure, I don’t know. So I lied, cause of that, and cause I was so terrified that you were gonna find out about Lindsay.”

His face turns read, and he rubs uncomfortably at the back of his neck, and you can see how nervous he is, but he continues anyway. “Then when we clinched a playoff spot, and had that party at Ryan’s, and you were hanging out with Seth, and it just kinda drove me off the edge. You came to the party with me, but you weren’t actually mine, and thinking about you with someone else- fuck, I hated it. I was so pissed that night,”

It was the same night that he let it slip that he saw you and Seth at Boone’s, it was when things started to unravel.

“Then we beat Tampa and yeah, fuck- I just, I saw that text from Lindsay on your phone,” He actually looks pained talking about it, and you feel guilty all over again.

“I don’t know, I don’t know how to say this.” He starts, running his hand through his hair repeatedly, eyes darting around the room. “I just-,” He starts again, but stops, and you wait patiently, stomach erupting with nerves while you listen. “I felt like shit, cause I actually liked you. Like you were the first girl in forever that I actually had feelings for, and then to find out that it was fake? I don’t know I lost it,”

You try not to let your head spin at his confession, because you’ve been waiting for him to say that for so long, but there’s still so much more you need to know, so you continue to listen.

“I was so pissed, but I had to focus on the playoffs, so I just ignored you, which wasn’t right, but I didn’t know how else to handle it. And then we lost game six and I got hurt and you came over, and to be honest, I hadn’t even thought about Lindsay for weeks, and then you found that fucking jacket, and I could literally see everything going up in flames around me, and I didn’t deal with it well, I was an asshole, but you were so mad, and I knew what I did was worse, but I was still so hurt I couldn’t just let it go. I had no fucking idea what I was feeling so I kept texting you, and you wouldn’t answer, so I went to go talk to Seth, and then I saw your purse on the table,”

He pauses for a second after that, and you bite the insides of your cheeks, hearing all this makes you realize just how bad you fucked up.

“That just kind of confirmed what I was thinking, that text from Lindsay and you seeing Seth, I was so sure that you were just playing me, and I was pissed, so I left. And I shouldn’t have done it, I shouldn’t have hit Seth either, but I don’t know, I was feeling so much shit, and I was being impulsive. I don’t know, it was just hard. That’s when we talked on the phone, and I said a lot of shit I shouldn’t have said. We went the whole summer without talking, and I barely talked to Seth either. So when I got back into town, I just wanted things to be okay with me and him so I asked him to pick me up from the airport so we could talk. He explained what happened that night, told me everything, and then when we got back to my place, I played the answering machine, and that’s when we heard your message,” He chuckles a little bit as he says it, and even though your ears burn with embarrassment, you can’t help but smile a little bit.

“I went over to your place right after that,” Your eyes widen when you hear him say that cause you don’t remember seeing him until your run in at the thai place. What was he talking about?

“I don’t know what I was expecting but it sure as hell wasn’t what I got. I was ready to forget everything honestly, and then he opened the door, and-.”

“Wait what?” You stop him, speaking for the first time since you sat down, “You came to my house? Who opened the door?”

Josh looks confused, “Yeah? I came the day I got back, but that guy Blake opened the door.”

Oh my god. That day that Blake was at your place, when he was acting all weird after he answered the door. It was because it wasn’t Mr. Danby at the door...

It was Josh.

[itsreigns]

Lost You - Part 2

Part 1

Seth Rollins x Reader

Seth and (Y/N) have been dating for awhile, even moved in together. But Seth has been growing apart from her… failing her. This time, (Y/N) reached her breaking point.

Requested by @tryingtofindaplaceinthisworld

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PART 2 

It’s been two weeks since you left. You’ve been living with your friend, Alyssa. She has been the absolute best. Even when you weren’t the best of companies, not even close. You still were moody… you still cried yourself to sleep, sometimes out of sadness, sometimes out of anger, other times out of both. 

You hated yourself for giving him that much importance, for allowing him to break you. You were never that type of girl. But with him… he worked his way through all your walls, carefully. So you just opened up your heart and let your guard down completely. You let him in 100%. 

Never again. 

Seth called you four or five times every day during the first week. You never picked up. He left voicemails. You never even heard them. He texted you. Those… you read, but never replied. Eventually, he stopped trying. 

‘Please, pick up the phone. I’m worried about you.’

‘Just hear me out. Please. That’s all I ask. Hear me.’

‘I can’t live in a world where you hate me. I just can’t.’

‘Just got home… You really came pick up your stuff when I wasn’t here. Even left your key. This isn’t home anymore. Not when you’re not here with me.’

‘I wanted to tell you this in person, but I can see now that I won’t ever have the chance. I’m sorry that I failed you. I wish I hadn’t ruined what he had, like I always do with anything that actually is important to me. I love you more than words can say. I just wanted you to know that. Goodbye, (Y/N).’

That was the last time he tried to contact you. That text broke you even more. This was the Seth you fell in love with, not the shell of Seth that had been living with you for the past couple of months. 

Alyssa’s voice snaps you out of your thoughts. “Are you even listening to me, girl?” The look on your face tells her that you weren’t. “(Y/N), you have to make a decision. You either listen to what he has to say, or you let him go. But you have to decide. Living like this is no option, and definitely not good or healthy for you.”

“I know.” You mumble, looking down at your hands. Alyssa keeps caressing your hair in understanding. “I just… I am so confused. So hurt. I honestly don’t know what to do.”

“Just… don’t overthink it. Things will be clear rather sooner than later.”

You nod in agreement, but the tightening, the weight in your chest, that uneasy feeling is still there. It never left since that day.

Alyssa went to work, but you had a day off today, so you just decided on staying home and get some rest. Maybe watch some cheesy movie or something. And you were exactly doing that when your phone started ringing. 

Unknown Number

Odd. Who could it be? 

Your mind wandered to Seth. But it couldn’t be him. He’d call you from his number. You take a deep breath before picking up.

“(Y/N)?” The voice on the other end of the line said. 

You feel your heart in throat, a lump forming, you’re not quite sure why. “Who is this?”

“It’s Becky.” She says, as if testing waters, but you can’t bring yourself to say anything. “I know you probably don’t want to talk to me too, but Seth is my best friend so… I’m worried sick about him.” First, you’re angry that she’s calling you, but now hearing her, your chest is tightening, anxiety setting in. “Have you heard from him lately? By lately, I mean today or yesterday?” 

You clear your throat, trying to find your voice. “Hm. I- No. I haven’t heard from him.” And then, you find the strength to say the word that ringing in your brain. “W-why?”

“Fuck!” She lets out. “I was hoping he had trying to contact you.” She really did sound desperate, and it was really making you nervous. “I- We had some time off this week. He went home two days ago and I didn’t hear from him ever since. I figured he’s just been resting, you know… because he hasn’t been so good… but it’s been two days and he never picked up his phone or replied to my messages. Mine or anyone’s for that matter. And that’s just not him.”

Your breath gets caught in your throat. And it was not pain, it was not anger. It was fear. You’re terrified that something happened to him. 

“(Y/N)? Are you there?” Becky calls, after a couple of seconds with no response.

“I- I am. I just… Fuck…” You’re so scared, your mind is racing, you can’t even organize your thoughts. “H- he didn’t really reach out? I mean, t- to any of you?”

“No… he didn’t text me or return my calls. Nor Roman’s.” She reaffirms. “I’m just worried that something happened. He- Well… He has been very down. Very sad. I’ve never seen him like that.”

Once again, you can’t manage to say anything. The silence deafening. Until Becky clears her throat and speaks again. “I just want you to know that nothing ever happened between me and him. He’s like a big brother to me. He’s family. That’s all. Plus, I would never do that to you. He would never do that to you. And I know for a fact that he loves you.” She explains, slowly and gently, as if waiting for it to reason you.

You take a deep breath, emotions taking over you. “You know that he… Seth, he really loves you. He’s just… complicated. But he loves you with all his heart.”

“I- I love him too. So fucking much.” You say in between a shaky breath, as a tear rolls down your face.

“I know you do.” She says simply.

Suddenly it hits you. You need to do something.  

“Look, I- I’ll call him. Yeah, that’s what I’m going to do, I’m going to call him and he will be fine.” You say rapidly, trying to convince yourself more than her. “I’ll call you when I know something.”

Your hands are trembling, you can barely scroll down your contacts’ list. You finally reach his name. Without no hesitation, you press “call”. 

It beeped once.

Twice.

It keeps on beeping and nothing.

You’re starting to panic. Tears streaming down your face. “No, no, no, no. Pick up, pick up, pick up.” You keep repeating to yourself. 

It goes to voicemail so you give up and call Becky again. 

“He’s not picking up. He’s not picking up, Becky.” You tell her, your voice shaken by emotion and fear. You’re met with silence from the other end. Becky is at a loss for words. “That’s it. I’m going there. I’m going home.”

“Ok, but tell me as soon as you know anything. Please.” She pleads, you could tell she was worried sick too.

“Of course.” You assure her. “And Becky… thank you for calling me. Bye.”

With that, you grab you car keys and head fast to your home. Wherever Seth is, that’s home to you.

You finally get there. You walk all the way towards the front door, taking a deep breath before ringing the doorbell. 

It’s been a minute and no one opened the door. So you ring it again. And again. You’re growing agitated. 

You finally hear some movement inside. Some shuffling around, until the door finally fluttered open. 

He opens the door without even asking who it is, and walks back inside the house without doing it again. You walk quickly behind him, closing the door behind you.

“Seth.” You say gently as you reach and take ahold of his hand.

That was enough to make him pay attention. He turns to face you, looking like a deer in headlights. The look on his face is just… breaking your heart even more. He looks like himself, but there’s something about his eyes… they used to be so vivid, so happy, now they hold so much sadness. 

You keep your hand locked with his, and move your other hand to caress his bearded cheek gently. Once you do that, he tightens the hold on your locked hands. You had missed this so much. His touch. His skin on yours. His beard under your fingers. 

He looks so vulnerable�� about to break down. You have never seen in like this. 

“You’ve been crying.” He mumbles softly, repeating the words he said on that same day. Even at his worst, he’s worried about you.

“Oh Seth…” You choke out, tears filling your eyes as you pull him into a tight hug. 

He takes a second to wrap his arms around you, but when he does, he holds you real tight. It’s only a few seconds until he starts sobbing uncontrollably. His whole body was tense and shaking. You’ve never seen him in this state.

“Let it all out, baby. I’m here. I’m here with you. You’re good. I’ve got you.” You say in a choked voice, trying to maintain your strength and be there for him.

“I’m so, so sorry.” He sobs, giving you a squeeze. “I’m a mess, I always ruin everything. I always ruin everything I touch. And God knows I didn’t want to ruin you.”

You pull back so you could face him, cradling his face in your hands. His eyes were red and puffy.  “You didn’t ruin me. I’m still standing.”

“But I hurt you. I hurt you so bad. You’re still standing, but you’re wounded.” He averts his gaze away from your, almost ashamed, as some more tears run down his cheeks. “I avoided you. I didn’t pay attention to you. I pushed you away… I fucking failed you, (Y/N). Roman and Becky… they warned me. They tried to set me straight. But...” He sighs deeply. “I always sabotage myself. I can’t do anything right. I was planning on marrying you, having kids with you. I had it all figured out, and I ruined it.” He lets out a sad chuckle. “And now I lost you.”

He breaks free from your hold and goes sit on the couch. Propping his elbows on his legs and resting his face on his hands, he takes a couple of deep breaths. You go and sit on the small table in front of him, caressing his knee gently. You didn’t say anything though, you feel like he had things he wanted to get off his system, so you just decided to give him time. 

After a couple of minutes in silence, he finally speaks again.

“You know… everyone expects so much of me. All the fucking time. I have so much pressure on me. To be perfect. Unflawed. And I’m none of those things. I’m fucking damaged.” He sighs once more, before continuing. “I just want to be me for a change. I don’t want to think about what people will say. I just want to live… to feel.”

“I love you with all your flaws, all your damage and all your scars. I love that you’re not perfect. You’re perfect in all your imperfection. You’re perfect to me.” You pause a bit to gain courage. “Those things you said, I wanted them too. All of them. With you. Marry the love of my life. Have a small baby running around the house calling you ‘daddy’.” His smile lit up with that last part. “And I’m sure you’d be the best daddy ever.”

Suddenly, his face grows serious. “C-Can I kiss you? Please, let me kiss you. Even if it’s the last t-”

In one motion, you kneel in front of him and press your lips to his. Hard and confidently.

When you pull away, you smile at each other. Then, you get up on your feet and pull him up right after. “Now, you and I are going to bed and sleep a bit, get some rest, because I am exhausted and I know you are too.” He smiles sweetly, and leaned in to press a kiss to your forehead before heading to your bedroom, hand in hand with you.

He goes to the bathroom first, so you use that time to message Becky, telling her that Seth’s ok and you’re with him, so she could stop worrying. You thanked her, yet again, for being a good friend and for reaching out.

Once Seth comes out, you set the phone on the nightstand and laid back on the bed, quickly being joined by Seth, who immediately pulled you closer to him.

“I missed you so much. I don’t ever want to be without you. Ever again. Ok?” He says, in a pleading manner, with his forehead pressed against yours. You nod affirmatively, reaching up and pecking him on the lips.

“Only if you never push me away again. I’m here for you, no matter what. Whatever bothers you, you come to me. No judgements.” You let him know your terms.

“Never again. I promise you.”

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