#seriously this is for such a specific niche of like a few other people

[finchhollow]

here. have a ren shitpost. bc for whatever reason goodles is the joke of the week in the gc

[oscargender]

I have some thoughts brewing abt my gender and sexuality that I might feel ready to share soon. Idk idk

[nondelphic]

Where I’ve Been and the Future of nondelphic

TLDR; I’m coming back to this blog.

I’m so nervous to post this I literally had to take a nervous shit after drafting this post just THINKING about posting it but uhhh…

Long time no see!

It’s been well over 3 months since I posted regularly on this account. I never intended to take a break, but I got overwhelmed.

I started this account in the middle of August of 2024 with a very specific niche that, if you have seen my posts before, will recognise. 

Honestly, it started mostly as a distraction from my real-life problems. I’d began writing again last spring after a long time of writing block due to anxiety, depression, and getting used to my anti-depressants. Suddenly, I went from not being able to get out of bed to being able to get out of bed just to write. It became an escape. Just like writing fanfiction used to be when I was a pre-teen.

Through that, I rediscovered how much I actually love writing and creating. And when that happened, I also started craving community. I’ve never really had writing friends (the few I had were short-lived), and I found myself missing that connection.

That’s kind of where this blog came in. It was an experiment, not something I intended to take seriously. Just a low-effort, continuous space online that wasn’t too personal but could resonate with a wide diaspora of writers. Somewhere people could see themselves in my posts.

I’ve always been in fandom or hobby spaces online in some form—grew up in a developing tech society with zero internet safety guidance, so my relationship with social media is honestly decent, all things considered. But in recent years I’d mostly been a consumer rather than a creator. And I missed that. The active partaking. The sense of community. The external validation from like-minded strangers (very Gen Z of me, I know).

And also, it gave me something to do over summer, which is the worst time of year for me. I’ve struggled with seasonal depression for years, and writing got me through the worst days of my summer uni break. But it also stirred up so many thoughts and ideas I wanted to share.

So I committed to not only starting a blog about writing, but updating it continuously, with a fixed set of posts to be posted everyday. 

Part of the experiment was personal, but another part was professional. As someone studying and working in media and social media (amongst other things), I know how algorithms work. I understand how consistency, timing, and frequency affect reach and engagement. So I also wanted to test a theory—that’s not really a theory—that if you just post a lot, at the same time, every day, you’ll see growth.

And it worked. I gained over 4,000 followers in just six months.

Numbers aren’t everything, but I won’t pretend it wasn’t validating. Especially when I’d never had a following before. People were engaging, reblogging, sending kind messages. I felt seen, and I felt like what I was making had value.

It was also fascinating to experience it from both sides, both as the creator and as the media nerd in the background mentally noting what worked, what flopped, and why.

Everything was going great.

So why did I disappear?

Well, first of all, my seasonal depression carried on to constant depression and major social anxiety during autumn and into winter. I slept all day. Didn’t go to school. Could barely leave my apartment to go grocery shopping. All I did was write and update this blog. Make sure I had enough posts queued for the coming week. 

I had some visible breaks on this blog which I always announced. “sorry can’t post rn i’m stressed need time to update my queue”. Which was true, and I felt proud of myself for being transparent about it.

But the more my following grew and the more people interacted with me, the more I started doubting myself. I don’t know if it was my anxiety, depression or probable ADHD being the culprit of this, or just plain old imposter syndrome, but I started dreading opening tumblr.

I love coming up with post ideas for people to go “omg are you inside my brain rn?” or “I love your blog, your posts make me feel seen,” and I’ve had nothing but positive experiences with everyone visiting this blog. Yet, with the growing eyes on this page, I just felt this impending fear that someday it will all be gone.

So I do what I’ve always had a habit of doing! I self-destructed. And left this blog with the excuse (to myself) to work on myself and come back stronger.

And I guess that sorry excuse has kinda come true, although at the time, I was lying to myself. This post is literally me announcing I’m coming back. But back when I abandoned this blog, I, with a heavy heart, was really planning on not coming back. The more the weeks, and then months stretched on without opening tumblr, a growing guilty conscience brewed inside of me.

I’d open the app, stare at the little icon, and immediately close it again. I didn’t know how to explain myself without it sounding dramatic or like I was attention-seeking. And the longer I waited, the harder it got to come back.

Because what do you even say after months of radio silence on a blog that wasn’t supposed to mean this much to you in the first place?

But the thing is it does mean something. And even when I tried to let it go, I kept thinking about it. I’d see something funny and think, “that would make a good nondelphic post.” I’d draft ideas in my nondelphic ideas google docs, fully knowing I wasn’t posting them, but unable to turn off that part of my brain that wanted to connect with other writers, other people who got it.

I ghosted my own blog. And I won’t pretend I had a huge dramatic epiphany or breakthrough that led me back here. Just the quiet realization that I missed it. And I have better routines now. And expectations. That make it impossible for me to turn into the same all-or-nothing approach to this blog I had during my darkest days. Don’t worry, I’m still deeply insecure, anxious and depressed, so my self-deprecating posts will continue as scheduled! But I’ve found other coping mechanisms that don’t rely on…….. Tumblr’s algorithms.

I don’t need to be 100% healed or consistent or perfect to post. And everyone who has sent me a message during the time I’ve been away that I’ve been too scared to reply to has assured me of exactly that. Maybe I can just… come back. A little softer. A little slower. A little more human.

I’m not sure what the future of this blog looks like exactly. I don’t have a new “post 10 times a day” strategy lined up. But I do know I want to write again. I want to talk to you again. I want to rebuild what I tore down with my silence. Not out of pressure or expectation, but because I want to.

So this is me, stepping back into it. One foot in the door. No grand promises, just a little wave from the threshold.

Hi again.

I’m coming back soon. How soon? I think it’s best to not make any promises, but I’ve committed to coming back now, so I’m still gonna promise “soon.”

Also, genuinely thank you. To everyone who reached out in my DMs or sent something to my ask box while I was gone: I read every single message. Even if I didn’t respond, I saw you. My heart felt so big reading your well wishes and worries. Like genuinely, I didn’t know this little corner of the internet could hold so much kindness. So thank you, from the bottom of my stupid overwhelmed heart.

See you soon ♡

xoxo nondelphic

Ps. I’m gonna write another post over on @rebellenotes in the near future for anyone curious about what I’ve been up to in the last few months.

[angelbby555]

"Controlling each others tinder dates!"

Summary: Your friend and you share a YouTube channel. For a video you decided to control each other's tinder dates. A wave of embarrassment passes through you when you're forced to act like a fool in front of one of the sexiest men alive.

pairing: Bradley Bradshaw x female reader

word count: 4000 K

warning: second hand embarrassment, reader acting cringe, one suicide joke

How you started recording theses stupid videos you didn't know. Really you just filmed your life for the fun of it. Talking to camera, when you were stress and occasionally recording your friends birthdays.

Your phone memory started to get full. To protect your storage, you opted to upload your videos on YouTube. Camilla and Josephine, your friends had a very hard laugh and started calling you a YouTuber. No matter how much you defend yourself, your friends always teased you about it.

The videos were very simple. You crying hysterically to the camera or you and your friends hanging out together. The videos were raw and authentic, none of it was cut or edited. Silly videos were all they were.

Then it all changed. One of the videos titled "twister & gossiping" had gained a lot of attention. You didn't know how people found the video of you and your girlfriend bending and stretching over each other while talking shit about a few people in your lives. But people found it and before you knew it the video had around 100k views.

To the 3 of you it was a massive audience. And it was crazy that you had actually gained money off a video that had no purpose being for anyone else. The other stupid videos got more attraction and before you girls knew it, you were making cash while simply having fun.

You started to take the whole YouTube thing seriously. All 3 of you decided to quiet your jobs and share an apartment together. Probably one of the best decisions you ever made. Every day felt like a massive slumber party with Josephine and Camilla.

The videos started to become more structured. Trying new ideas, never sticking to one niche. Camille liked to do cooking videos and preferred the filming side of things. Josephine liked to do pranks on the public, and start talking to random people on the street. You were down for anything. None of you ever felt the need to record a video to put food on the table but it was more of a want. Everything was fun with your friends so every video was a blast to record.

-

This time around you guys were getting around to Josephine's idea. It was a prank video that involved controlling each other's dates. All three of you had found tinder match specifically for the video, just so you could troll them, you guys being in each other's ears and telling your friends what to say.

Camilla controlled Josephine's date, and You controlled Josephine's as she talked to a guy named Richard. You told her to say a lot of stupid and cringey stuff. Even getting her to start break dancing in the middle of a restaurant. For Joey it was humiliating. But for you and Camilla it was the most funniest stuff you ever did.

Now the sun was coming down casting a beautiful orange color in the sky. It was finally your turn to go on a date, while your friends controlled what you did. You stood out in the parking lot of a bar while setting your things up with your friends. Joey's blue eyes had a mischievous glint on them. You already knew she was gonna get pay back for what you put her through earlier.

"Oh my gosh I'm scared! I already know Joey's gonna put me through hell right now!" You squealed out as you felt your heart thundering in your chest. Josephine smiled knowing she was the reason for your stress and clipped the small mic underneath your shirt, so the audio would be better in the video.

"Show us your hunka piece of meat that's your date." Camilla teasingly wiggle her eyebrows behind the camera. Immediately you smirked at what she said, since you thought your guy was so much more attractive compared to Richard and Peter from their dates.

"Everyone shut up and look at these amazing pictures." Your friends cackled when you pulled up Bradley Bradshaw's tinder profile. You showed the camera his photos. "He does not know how to pose for the camera, but trust me ladies he is delicious!"

The first picture was Bradley smiling in his dress blues with his arm around a man's shoulder, the next picture was him smiling awkwardly while in a pool, and the last one was a beach picture as he looked absolutely ripped with his shirt off. You glanced at Camilla and she didn't look to impressed so you pretend to lick your phone screen while on his picture, making both your friends laughing.

"As everyone can see y/n's type is very questionable." Josphine threw her arm over your shoulder and Camilla nodded.

"No, how does it feel to have zero taste?" You shot back. "Did you not see those abs? Doesn't that make you want to rip him apart?" You shrieked as you both stared at his amazingly tan body.

"I mean yeah he's okay, but do you see his first two pic?! He's like a dad the way he takes pictures." Camilla added. You stared up at the red and blue sign that illuminated Hard Deck. Bradley had told you to meet him here.

"Plus you see that little number in the corner babe? He's fucking 37 a whole 10 years older then you!" That fact did not cancel your attraction from Bradley it only made you more intrigued. Your friends made you feel like a different breed for like older guys but in your mind it was better to like a man then a boy.

"37 and fine! Hello!" You screamed obnoxiously in Josphine's face making her laugh. He blonde hair was all over her face. "He's straight out of my dreams. I think he might be my husband." You declared just making your friends laugh in your face yet again.

"After this date? He will be running for the hills." Camilla laughed. It was a shame that this was all for video, because you really did find him attractive.

"Please don't make me sound so stupid." You pleaded to the girls even though any beg would go in one ear and out the other. Your phone buzzed in your head, it was a message from Bradley. "Oh shit, he's already in the bar."

"Dang we haven't even made you do anything and you already fucked your chance up, by being late." You shoved Josephine off your shoulder and flipped her off. You wanted this guy so bad. You didn't mind the age or his random tinder picture, you thought it was cute.

"Alright show time ladies let's head into the bar." Camilla directed. You felt your heart speed increase. There was no chance you would be leaving this date without looking like an idiot. You never been to the Hard Deck before, but after this you weren't gonna be showing your face around here any time soon.

☆⊹~⟡⋆

You slide the wireless ear bud into your ear and let your hair fall to the front of your face to cover the air pod. Josephine started texting to see if you could hear her and you nodded in response.

The bar was packed with people in khaki uniforms. Until right now your realized this was a bar made for navy men. The thought didn't pass through your head that Bradley could be in the navy up until this moment. This bar wasn't your scene, and you were starting to regret agreeing to do this prank video for your guys stupid channel.

"Well be right over there filming. Anything you do, don't look at the camera so Bradley doesn't get suspicious!" Camilla yelled over the loud 80's music playing in the jukebox. You were staring to get really nervous and your hands started to shake from the adrenaline running through your veins.

"Good luck!"

"Fuck you both!" They both laughed and wandered away to film you in secret. This prank was beyond out your comfort zone, and it didn't help that Bradley was so attractive you were nervous to be in his presence.

The bar was decorated with model planes hanging on the ceiling. While there was also white pitchers hung in the ceiling in various circles forms. Soft yellow lights illuminated the bar, casting it in a warm environment. It definitely looked like a guys hang out place.

Bradley had told you, he was sitting down at a table somewhere but you couldn't find him. The bar was too noisy for your liking and lots of people were brushing up against you. You were just trying to find your tinder date when you bumped into someone's firm chest.

"No way you just bumped into Bradley!" Josephine cackle in the ear bud before you look at him. You could feel the indents of his abs while your had rested on his stomach to steady yourself.

You looked up at Bradley and there the 37 year old man was in all of his glory. His eyes were a honey burnt color and he looked even more gorgeous in real life, then in his photos.

"Handsome?" You pressed your lips together staring up at him. So tall, so your type. Bradley lips twitched up into a smirk.

"Bradley." He pointed at his chest, correcting you. Bradley pointed his index finger back to you. "Pretty?" He mocked you making your pupils grow in size.

"Yes sir." You stupidly replied making Bradley chuckle. Seeing him laugh automatically had you smiling. Love at first sight, you just met him and right now, you wanted to do anything he asked. Bradley placed his large calloused hand over your smaller one that was resting on his abdomen. All you were thinking about was that under his white shirt he was absolutely ripped.

"It's good to finally meet you in person. You wanna come get a drink with me?" You obediently nodded your head and he smiled. Bradley hand was on your lower back guiding you through the crowd. His small touch had a shiver run down your spine.

You got to the bar and both sat down on the stools. Bradley had flagged the woman down st the bar so you could both place your drink order. It broke your heart that you were using him for a stupid prank with your friends meanwhile he might actually be trying to find love on the dating app.

"You know what babe? Well let you take control the sails for a little with Brad." Josephine said in your ear. Your phone was in your pocket on call, so your friend could hear the conversation you were having with Bradley.

"No fucking way, you let me?" You exclaimed out loud. Bradley gave you a funny look but still smiled.

"What did you say?" Bradley asked. That moment you noticed why that might have sounded weird when he hadn't spoken.

"I said your so fucking sexy, when did you get here?" You tried to save yourself but came off to forward. You could hear both your friends laughing in your ear piece.

"About 20 minutes ago, on the time you said you would be here, 6:30." Bradley teased you. Their came another wave a guilt about being tardy since you were too busy goofing off with your friends at the beach.

The bartender came to leave the drinks off and you both thanked her. The older woman glanced at Bradley in a knowing manner that had him shaking his head. The woman turned to you and winked, before she left and stared preparing more drinks. You hated how you were immediately jealous of a woman you didn't even know.

"Cool people arrive late to everything." You said trying to excuse your late entry. Bradley smiled as he lifted his beer bottle to his lips.

"Oh that's too bad because I'm early to everything. Especially when a pretty girl gives me a time to meet her." Your felt your face grow warm at his flirtatious behavior. In your ear you heard both your friends giddy laugh at his response. If the roles were reversed and your date was 20 minutes late you would have left by then.

"Mh in order for me to be that pretty girl, I had to work very hard on my outfit. I changed into like a million different outfits." His puppy stare made you so intimated you couldn't meet his gaze, instead you picked on the label on the beer bottle like it was the most interesting thing in the world. "That why I'm late." You admitted timidly.

"Doesn't matter what you wear, you would still be the prettiest girl in the bar." His words were so assertive you almost believed him for a second. His hand engulfed your wrist and immediately you felt your body run hot.

"You probably tell that to all the girls." You tried brushing him off since your cheeks were turning rosy.

"No just the prettiest one." He squeezed you arm so you could at him. His knee brushed up against yours and in that moment you just want to curl into his lap and have his big arms wrapped around your waist.

"All for you." To him it was probably just banter that you took too long to get ready but it was the truth. Bradley gave you a small smile giving your hand another squeeze.

A guy with a buzz cut tried to squeeze between you and Bradley to order his drink. You were gonna move over but Bradley wasn't having it. He pulled on the leg of your bar stool and pulled you closer to him with zero effort. The guy glared at Bradley but he didn't care. That most have been the hottest thing a guy has ever done.

Bradley leaned in closer so you could hear him better. You never felt so submissive for a random guy in your life.

"Tell me when you finish your drink and we can head out and grab something to eat." It's not like he was asking you to propose but to you it felt like it.

You and Bradley kept talking and it was amazing. He was the sweetest guy you ever meet. Maybe he was trying to get into your pants but you honesty didn't care, at the moment he seemed like a gentleman.

Then it all came crashing down when you heard Josephine in your ear. For a couple seconds you had completely forgot you were filming while staring at Bradley mustache that you wanted all over your body.

"Alright that's it love bird. Were taking the wheel." You placed your hand over Bradley forearm afraid this perfect man would disappear. "Okay from here on out, I want you to interrupt him while hes talking, watch time he tries to speak." Your shook your head.

You didn't want to leave your friends hanging since they had done the prank even when they were embarrassed too. However Bradley was too amazing to be spoken over. You had to choose your friends though.

He was talking about his old piano teacher when he was a kid with a fond smile on his face.

"My strict piano teacher tried to hitting my hand with a ruler like I was Beethoven once and I-"

"My grandma liked Beethoven." You interrupted. But Bradley didn't seem to mind having his story interrupted just breaking into a smile.

"Did she?"

"Yeah." You couldn't find it in you to ramble about your own life as his honey burnt eyes stared at you. "I'm sorry keep going with your story." His eyes light up more, since his story hadn't been forgotten by you.

"Oh right uhm- My mom disliked her too, but I already knew she was paying so much for these classes so I dealt with this strict teacher." You found yourself getting lost in his story, before Josephine reminded you to interrupt him again. "But when she hit me hands with the ruler I just-"

"I wonder how the bar has this much navy stickers." You asked stupidly making yourself cringe. You saw a sad smile pull on Bradley's lips for interrupting his story again. You wanted to crawl in a whole and never show your face again. And this was only a slice of what your friends would put you through.

"I think Penny told me that her dad gave them to her since he collected so much of them." Bradley stared up at the stickers that decorated the wall across from you both. He wasn't even an asshole for you interrupting his story. A patient man.

"Start getting jealous about Penny." Josephine demanded making you wince, but you followed through anyway. You took a nervous swing of your beer. Here goes literally nothing.

"Who the hell is Penny? Why are you talking about other girls when I'm on a date with you?!" Your tone was harsh and you wanted to slam your head repeatedly on the table for sounding so insecure.

You watched as a small smile grew on his face, and he didn't peel his eyes off the navy stickers on the wall across the bar. It's like you could see hear siren going off in his mind at your red flag. He finally face you with a forced smile on his face.

"She's the bartender. I haven't done anything with Penny, she's just nice to me...plus she is dating my uncle." Bradley spoke to you slow like you were stupid. He didn't even need to owe you an explanation but he did anyway. "So you don't have to be jealous." There was a small teasing tone to his voice like earlier.

"As if I would I be jealous of that old bat." Your mouth was moving on your own as you scoffed. "I'm literally the prettiest girl in the bar." You were so embarrassed by your arrogant words you wanted to run and take cover, but you stayed sat.

"Right." He kept a forced grin on his face ad he took a swing out of his beer. If there was a gun on the table, you would have probably used it right that second.

"Tell him. I'm sorry about that Bradley, I just really love you." Josephine was laughing at her own cringe words. You hated this, never would you ever sit in front of a hot guy and from the bat say you loved him. But your mouth started to move, as you tired not to kill yourself.

"Bradley, I'm sorry I acted like that." You swallowed nervously when his gaze softened a bit. The words were on the tip of your tongue but you already were ashamed. "...But I love you."

Bradley's eyes widened for a second before he tried to play it cool. He probably thought you need a straight jacket after this.

"Do you love me?" You asked pathetically repeating your friends words. It was torture watching him freeze up.

"I....uhm, I think you're-"

"You don't love me!" You wrinkled your nose up, furrowing your brows like you were about to cry. "I knew it! You only love Penny!" You pretend to sob putting your head down and you see the panic settle in all over his features.

"Hey, hey, hey. Come on don't cry, you know I like you honey." His big hand was soothingly rubbing at your back. He didn't like you, he just wanted you to shut up. Josephine told you what to say next and you repeated her words.

"Then say you love me daddy!" You watched his ears get red and his tan chest turn crimson too. He was trying not to chuckle from the sudden domestic nickname. His mouth opened and closed his mouth like a fish, trying to find the 8 letter answer on his tongue.

"You do hate me!" You dramatically cried out making his hairs stand on end.

"I love you, I love you, I love you honey. Sh okay? Calm down." He rapidly answered. He tried shutting you up since the guy with the buzz cut from earlier was staring at you. Right now you bet Bradley would have killed for this guy to walk between you both so he could make a run for it.

"Then tell that to the whole bar?" You pretend to hiccup.

"What?" He furrowed his brows looking at you like your grown 3 heads.

"Scream it to the bar, tell everyone you love me daddy." You weren't saying any of this you were just listening to what your stupid friends told you to do.

"Honey I don't think that's-"

"I love you and I'll prove it to you daddy." You should become an actress since he believed you had a few screws loose in your head. It was taking all your will power to not look away and cringe at your behavior

"That's not necessary, pretty girl." His efforts of coaxing you with pet names would have worked on you, but your friends were calling you a pussy in your ear piece and you couldn't stand being called that. So you started to move up on your bar stool and Bradley lip parted and he shook his head out of fear. Placing his hands on your thighs to try to keep you seated.

"No, no, no baby sit down, please sit down- Oh my gosh." Bradley cover his face with his hand since you were now fully standing on the bar stool. It couldn't get much more worse then this. You repeated your friends words.

"Attention! Attention! Can I get everyone's attention." All You heard was your blood plumping extremely fast in your heart, when everyone started facing you and the crowd quieted down. Penny gave Bradley a funny look and he just shook his head not knowing what was going on. You kept acting like a fool as your friends told you what to say.

"Good afternoon everyone! I just got up here and wanted to say how much I love Bradley Bradshaw!" Your voice was the only one heard at the bar beside a few whistles making you really want to off yourself. "I just want everyone to know, I said yes! We're getting married!"

The bar erupted in a fit of cheers. You almost felt proud of yourself from everyone validation. But right now all you only cared about was if Bradley still liked you after this. You got down from the stool and Penny was laughing so hard she had to look away.

"Hey that was real cute, but I'm gonna go to the bathroom." Bradley took a big chug out of his drink like he needed after that, before slamming the bottle down on the bar and standing up. "I'll be right back."

That was code for 'see you never you crazy bitch.' When Bradley left for the supposed bathroom, you made eye contact with Penny and that was enough to have you shooting out of your chair too. You didn't even care to find your friends making an immediate exit out the bar.

You took a big exhale, that you didn't know you were holding before smelling the salt ocean air in. The only place you wanted to go was home right now as you made the jog to your car.

Shortly after you heard your obnoxiously friends loud footsteps and giggles behind you.

"Wait up!" They called as you got to the passenger side of the door before leaning against it as your friends stood before you panting.

"That was amazing. You really made me cringe hard!" Camilla was still filming you as both friends laughed. You let out a small whimper as you moved to Josephine throwing your arms around her. Burying your face in the crook of her neck, trying to shield yourself from what happened.

"Babe I'm sorry." Josephine laughed before before petting your head trying to calm your nerves. You held her tight not sure if you would be able to recover from this one. The hottest guy to drop the earth, and you humiliated yourself in front of him.

"Hate to break it to you love bird, but the camera died and we didn't get the footage." Camilla joked making your head snap up at her.

"Don't even joke about that!" You shouted before burying your face in your friends shoulder. Fuck your stupid channel, screw your stupid friends, you hate this bar.

A few pathetic giggles slipped your lips as you held on to your friend for support. They both laughed with you trying to say comforting words.

"Just take me home!" You whined out followed by a laugh.

Your mind drifted to the hot 37 year old pilot. He would never give you a chance after pretending to be jealous, interrupting him as he talked, calling him daddy, and embarrassing him in front of the whole bar. At least you got a stupid YouTube video out of it.

[ai-satin-chic]

As some of you may know, I get quite a lot of requests for various artworks. I try to accommodate those which fit within my style, and even then, I sometimes push my boundaries if I think the request will broaden my artistic knowledge.

That said, I just want to put on record that I will *NEVER* produce artwork which falls under the following categories. STOP ASKING.

Fully nude. I may do the occasional "tasteful" tease, but that's about it. Seriously - my art focuses on the clothing. If you want nude, there's plenty of other places to find that.

Sch00l uniform. Not going there. I like cute pleated and plaid skirts, as well as pigtails, but I'm never going to create specific "sch00l" AI art.

Men/drag. I understand the niche, but it's just not mine. My art is the dream of beauty in the female form.

Anime. All my art is designed to be as realistic as possible. I'm not going to make cartoons.

P0rn. If I had £1 for every time I was asked for one my images to be converted into an "adult" image, I could pay my care for when my brain dies. Please. Stop asking for p0rn.

A few other weird ones too:

Very short hair/bald

No satin/silk (really?)

Traditionally male clothes such as jeans, pant suits etc

Images without backgrounds

Captions in the image - I prefer to keep the images "clean".

With all that, I want to thank people who have asked for genuine artworks - I've really enjoyed working with you and testing my ability.

[slugtranslation-hypmic]

Hello slug! Do you have any piece of advice you wish you knew when you first started out as a translator? (Or just something you want beginner translators to know)

I could go on about this all day if you let me, so I sat on this ask for a few weeks and tried to condense it down to five of the most helpful-- if a little abstract-- points. Hope this helps!

Usual reminder that I'm referring specifically to J->E media translation, although I would imagine most of this applies to media translation of other language pairs.

Edit: Ohhh Tumblr's being a nasty little man and not letting me post everything. Try to curtail my verbose ass, eh? We'll see about THAT! More in the reblogs it is.

A translation is a piece of creative writing informed by the unique needs and limitations of its author, audience, and medium. Before I write a single word, I always consider what approach is most appropriate for translating the work. This is informed by many things, including but not limited to: - Author(s). A work with a single author (most books, indie games) usually demands stricter fidelity, as the words you write become representative of this person's views within the English audience. A work with multiple authors (most bigger games, virtually all anime) may allow greater creativity in the pursuit of other goals. The author's purpose is also paramount. If the author's primary goal is to make people laugh, you will often want to make your work do just that. Serious works should read seriously. Romantic works should tug at heart strings. Occasionally, authors will provide specific guidelines to follow. You do not always have the ability to push back, even if you think they are horribly misguided--in many cases, the company you're working with can lose business if translation teams cause too much of a fuss. If the end result looks silly, you may be blamed for it in reviews and public perception. Responding publicly is not a good look and may hurt your chances at finding employment elsewhere. Conduct yourself professionally! (End of tangent.) - Audience. While rewriting a text to cater to an audience is almost never appropriate, it will often make you and the audience happier if you consider their expectations for translations. Fan translation readers often want to receive a black-and-white, "correct" interpretation of the text--an understandable desire; I'm not knocking this--and therefore may be more receptive to inappropriately detailed translation notes while less receptive to looser interpretations of the text. Readers of professional translations, especially paid works, often demand a higher level of polish and are less tolerant of juvenile goofery that can sometimes be gotten away with in fan translation. Similarly, genres affect the work. BL audiences are more likely to be LGBT+ than isekai action audiences and will expect translators to use more politically correct language. Some niche genres expect (at least, the appearance of) stricter fidelity at the word level than genres that attract a wider mix of casual and serious fans. - Medium. Even if one translator works on multiple iterations of the same series, the nature of the medium will force them to produce two very different translations. Anime and manga are often more understated compared to works of straight text (visual novels, actual novels, some RPGs) to avoid overwhelming the visuals. Anything that is voiced (anime, some video games) must follow the tone and sentence structure (Ie, "short clause, pause, long clause" is often translated as "short clause, comma, long clause" even if there are many, many other ways to express this idea) of the voiced line. Anything with character limits (anime subs, video games, manga) must be concise and punchy. In manga, the script's visual presentation--line length, what words should be placed together to create a nice shape, word length in skinny bubbles--must also be taken into consideration.

[physalian]

On Fight Scenes (Or, getting creative with your magic system)

This is coming from a reader’s perspective, not a writer’s, in what I like to see and what my thought process was when writing my fight scenes—I hate these things and can’t call myself any authority on the matter. They’re tedious and translating what’s in my head onto page is always frustrating.

This is also for fantasy and sci-fi: Fight scenes that have some magical or technological element to them, not a straight-up action story with two dudes punching each other. This includes anything from fights in Harry Potter to battling a Xenomorph to bending in ATLA to a throwdown between superheroes.

Side note: I really, truly hate “two dudes punching each other”.

—

I have a friend who loves comics, specifically DC Comics, and watches all the DCAU films. When we lived together, I often watched a lot with them. My favorite remains Constantine: City of Demons because unlike literally every other DCAU movie, it doesn’t drop the ball in the third act and devolve into a stakes-less fistfight. This dude faces *consequences*.

I’m not a comics (like actual, paper comic books) fan, but without fail, every time the setup is good, the characters are good, the first 2/3s are good with pacing and usually a mystery and passable character development like Batman: Under the Red Hood…. The last 15 minutes or so always abandon what had been a good plot for just superheroes punching each other and I get so bored. I’m invested and then they rarely deliver any payoff.

But I do like Constantine. Dude needs a nap.

Point is: On top of those fight scenes not really mattering, by the nature of what comic books are in that they can never stray too far from the status quo, or if they do, it doesn’t stay that way for long, the people who made these characters don’t get all that creative with their powers.

I think, actually, I liked Constantine so much because his stuff is rated R and it doesn’t shy away from the more realistic effects of living in a superhero society… without being gratuitous like The Boys.

I just get bored. The fight stops when the plot says so. Knockouts are arbitrary, power scaling is arbitrary. Someone can get thrown through a wall and walk it off but the villain or their buddy can come up behind them and hit them really hard on the head and that’s enough.

Anime is its own thing and would take far too much time to address here but I do want to talk about My Hero Academia real quick, following up on a previous post about tournament arcs.

Season 2 of the show has three main arcs: The tournament in the first half, and the Stain fight/final exams in the second.

For a while, the show actually seemed to take injuries rather seriously (for shonen, at least), and got insanely creative with characters’ very niche powers. In season 1, their teacher, Aizawa, gets pretty brutally beaten by a horde of villains and his powers are permanently impacted by his recovery—he can’t use them for as long as he used to, and he has a new scar.

Midoriya, too, whose powers break his bones on the regular, has consequences for overusing them, like his hands and forearms not healing properly despite superpowered medical intervention.

Power scaling, too, was fantastic…. Until the Stain fight.

I will never understand the thought process behind this logic:

“Hey let’s show how powerful Todoroki is by having him manifest an entire glacier in about 3 seconds!” *9 episodes later* “Hey let’s make this fight with a dude who only has various blades to work with super tense by making Todoroki completely nerfed in a legit life or death situation!”

Buddy couldn’t take two seconds to yell at his friends to get the fuck out of the way? Was he worried about damage to the buildings? I feel like nepotism could have spared him from some consequences if breaking a few windows meant him not getting murdered. It wasn’t like he had daddy issues over his ice powers.

The rest of the show (until I DNFed) had similar issues. Powers were as competent as the plot allowed at any given moment, which I guess is the nature of shonen, but if you’re going to go out of your way to establish realistic rules and consequences really early on, breaking them willy-nilly because it looks cool later is annoying.

Which is applicable across all fantasy sub-genres: Consistency.

I might not be the best at writing the step-by-step choreography, but damn it if I don’t know how to make sure I’m not opening up plot holes in how much damage my characters take and dish out.

—

So. How I approach fight scenes as told by Eternal Night and my sci-fi WIP.

Before anything else, establish a reason that this has to be a fight, that it has to happen now, and what’s happening beneath the combat to keep the story progressing. The plot will not stop just for fisticuffs.

A magic system is only as cool as what its characters cannot do with it, and breaking those limits ruins the magic system.

Make sure this is a fight that can only happen in this story, taking full advantage of the various powers/abilities/magic system rules, if this is meant to be flashy and grand.

Eternal Night is about vampires, thus my vampires, being immortal, can take a lot of hits and not suffer long-term consequences compared to a mortal. I adhere to a lot of classic vampire lore while also making up my own rules. They don’t have super speed, super strength, or compulsion, they just have a lot of experience and know how to use their weapons well, and can essentially go at 100% without mortal limitations of fatigue.

Basically: My vampires are only as strong as a mortal in absolute life-or-death situations, but that’s also dependent on how strong they were in life. Somebody who was a couch potato isn’t going to be as strong as a bodybuilder, and that carries over. I don’t have “younger/older vampires are supernaturally stronger” rules.

They have the same immortality risks as most versions: Stakes, beheadings, sunlight. Anything else is survivable.

Simple magic systems tend to be the most robust because there’s less rules available to risk breaking or forgetting (why ATLA's bending feels so real).

So when I was writing ENNS’s big fight, on top of making sure they weren’t all gods with their weapons—they missed shots, got tired, made bad calls—priority one was making sure I kept killing blows consistent, and when they’re temporarily “dead,” that the timing of when they revive isn’t determined by the plot.

Meaning: If I have a vampire who, idk, gets stabbed by a regular sword and it “kills” them, they have to stay “dead” for whatever amount of time I’d previously established and not wake them up early to participate in the plot again. Those are my rules and I have to work with them.

And in that way, yes the choreography is frustrating, but even if it’s an average description of a fight, I will appreciate that the writer respects their own rules and still be entertained.

With that, in the sci-fi WIP I had incredibly complex and diverse magic systems, 3 complete and unique practices split between two characters. One of which was incredibly OP.

This was a very reluctant OP character who wouldn’t use the full extent of his powers even to save his own life, often to the ire of his team who suffers the consequences of unnecessarily complicated battles when he could one-shot the enemy but chooses not to.

Internal limits tend to be stronger than external ones if you have an OP character, because they’re more believably toggled on and off without breaking the lore.

Even with OP character stubbornly making life harder for himself, he was still OP. He had two different magic systems at his disposal, and beyond his internal limits, they had two very easily exploitable external limits.

Magic system A was tied to a physical artifact he had on his person. If he got separated from it, he couldn’t use it. A is also a lot harder to use if B is also busted.

Magic system B was counteracted easily by users of Magic system A, and by the enemy military who’d developed weapons specifically to nullify those powers, and that weapon was everywhere.

Which meant my fights concerning OP character were rarely “why doesn’t he insta-kill them” it was “oh shit, he can’t insta-kill them, now he has to be clever to get out of this alive”.

One of my favorite fights was at the tail end of Book 2 where he was stuck with two of his non-powered teammates, on a ship dead in the water being overrun by the enemy. The ship had no power, the radios were dead, and the engines were fried.

He had already been sick for half the book and physically and mentally exhausted, and when the enemy arrived, they nullified the rest of his powers. All he had was Magic System A, but in his condition, it was like being asked to do long division on paper by hand, because his calculator was broken.

Dude was not having a good time.

Which meant he was basically useless, with two of his basically useless teammates, who all had to work together to get creative and clever with the tools that they had, on a ship they all knew like the backs of their hands.

So many things they would not have had to do in any other situation, with stakes so much higher because OP was powerless. The characters came first, not their powers, which I think is the most crucial ingredient to any fight you want people to keep talking about for years to come.

—

I can’t tell you how to choreograph your scenes, but I do think that why they’re fighting matters far more than what they’re fighting about, and especially in fantasy: What’s the point of writing magic if you don’t take full advantage of your magical characters?

[fem1nqzi]

Fem1nqzi intro

𓂃 　౨𓎟𓎟　　♡⠀ 　𓎟𓎟ৎ　𓂃

Hi welcome to my blog !

I go by kirin and I’m 18 years old . ^_^

I’m a lesbian and a radical feminist, not the fun kind. I’m not here to educate others or explain myself, maybe I’ll participate in the occasional discussion with another woman who shares similar views as me but other than that I don’t care to change stranger’s beliefs on social media as I’ve realized it’s a waste 99% of the time. But if you’re a woman actually interested in radical feminism, I can direct you to some good educational resources or community.

Some of my interests/likes/hobbies include:

- Video games, retro and new

- Reading, lesbian romance and radfem literature

- Anime/manga, just a very specific few

- Chess, I’m learning and very much ass

- Art, whether it’s looking at it or creating it

- Music, movie/shows, photography, etc…

- My girlfriend that I love very much

_____

My beliefs/values:

I only believe in same sex attraction for sexualities like lesbian or gay.

I’m gender critical on all aspects, whether it’s about gender roles, transgenderism, societal concepts of femininity and masculinity, etc. I want it all abolished.

While I do participate in misandry it is not the reason I am a radfem or lesbian nor it is an extension of it, I simply hate men (just look at the news or statistics). Women’s liberation and safety will always be more important to me.

Obviously I do not support any sort of LGBTQ+/woke ideology that tries to create new genders or pronouns, or that change the definition of a pre-existing sexuality / gender.

Might be niche but I genuinely dislike people who fake mental illnesses or developmental disorders (common thing in ‘woke’ online spaces), usually it’s obvious with self diagnosers or people who have ‘systems’ on discord, and it’s hilarious to me that people actually take them seriously ?

While I support women fully no matter what, I don’t think anyone is free from criticism and I’m not afraid of sharing my opinions either.

I am fully against women being with men romantically and I truly believe that 4B or female separatism is the only way for a woman to be safe and happier in life. Prioritizing female friendships is much more healthier and I don’t see an issue with platonically living with your friend(s) to combat loneliness.

PERSONALLY I very much dislike the ‘femme’ and ‘butch/masc’ thing in the lesbian community and it genuinely feels very heteronormative with how some lesbians treat each other in those kinds of relationships. Nor do I like the idea of being put in those kind of boxes just based off the way I dress or the things I like.

I could honestly go on about all of my beliefs but most of them can be found in general radfem ideology and I’m tired of typing .

Anyways I don’t think I’ll be very active but I’ll try to keep up with this blog and pop in every now and then to yap

[writingjourney]

I’m in need of some advice and kind words. As a fellow writer I’m really struggling to believe people will and want to read my stuff. There’s no real engagement anymore and I’m worried that if I post my long-form fic that no one will give it a chance. It’s really bringing me down because I love it so much but it feels like no matter what I try to do my stuff just doesn’t get seen or liked? I’ve even thought about changing my entire way of how I do things since I don’t think the way I write is working for the masses. How do you keep up the motivation as a popular writer and do you have an advice?

Hello anon!! I feel like this is something many of us currently deal with. And first of all I seriously hope that you do share your story!! ♡

To be completely honest with you the lack of engagement in the fandom has for sure impacted my own motivation which is why I haven't been putting as much time into longer fics (nor the Friday Nights series or IKNBS, I do write but I refuse to force myself). I don't feel any urgency because uploading fics hasn't made me as happy as it used to. It feels like only other active writers are reading fic atm and it creates a lot of pressure on creatives to stay super active.

I'm aware that I'm insanely privileged to have the engagement that I do have, that the type of stories I want to write are also the type of stories that generally seem to appeal. However, engagement tells you NOTHING about the quality of your work, only how many people are active in a fandom or like a specific pairing/character/trope. Your own unique voice matters more than numbers.

I also notice that a lot of people who used to read my works have disappeared which I completely understand. The fixation can ebb away during times of inactivity or when a certain hype dies down. People just don't get that dopamine hit anymore and move on. It's also entirely possible they get tired of a certain style of writing and prefer other writers at times, what do I know. I definitely don't blame anyone for that. First and foremost people should read for their own enjoyment and engage with fandom in a way that makes them happy. It makes no sense to pressure people into engaging. A huge issue right now is people overthinking these things which makes support transactional instead of genuine.

I don't care much about notes but I REALLY miss the feeling of sharing a fic with people who are excited for it, that sense of an active community. BUT the activity will come back – the movie will come out, new music and videos, heck even a whole new Papa!!! That's the natural flow of things. We can't be excited and super active all the time, we need phases of calmness as well (which is an act of rebellion in the capitalist hellscape of overproduction and churned out content. I am honestly glad Ghost is taking it easy).

Now, I recommend you write your story exactly how you want to!!! do NOT change it for the sake of popularity because it will lose its very soul and you will struggle to be happy with it by the end. You know how you want to tell your story and nothing else matters. It will find its readers or you can wait and share it at a later point. I recommend that you approach other writers and readers and intensify that contact, make friends and talk to them about your stories, hype each other up, share snippets. It's even more meaningful to know people you like enjoy what you do. I am currently working on super niche fics for non-Ghost characters and I'm honestly having a great time chasing that dopamine by just writing what I'm really into and sharing it with friends. Fandom is community, fandom is fun and we can work to make it better for everyone.

A few general tips when it comes to making stories accessible: Format them to be readable (paragraphs!!), add a "read more" break, add proper content information and a nice summary to draw people in, add some visual appeal like a banners or stock image edits (like i do for IKNBS) and then tag the fics with relevant tags (and only those). Also make sure to tag the OG post, tags on reblogs do nothing for reach. Engage with the community when you feel like it and it's likely that the community will engage back. Being supportive is worth it, being kind is always worth it even if it amounts to nothing.

[traumatizeddfox]

Idk where I stand on the term narc abuse but 2 things to bring up.

First, the jury is out on if abuse via narcissistic tendencies (not related to npd inherently) via specifically the term "narc abuse" is real or not. Theres both official and unofficial sources, charities, University/medical journals, etc that acknowledge it as different from more common forms of abuse/how the abuse is brought on and why (someone being physically abused due to their abuser being on drugs and over-reacting to a small trigger vs someone getting physically abused due to percieved sin/religious undertones will have varying experiences, ones that reasonably involve different labels) this warrants a different label and plenty that do not and criticize it. I won't judge a terminology when even medical professionals can't seem to decide yay or nay. I just figured I'd mention it because the only way people know this term usually is TikTok but it's actually older than TikTok, they just picked it up. There is a difference between someone with npd and someone whose a narcissist in a non-medical/mood/personality disorder way and I do think the people trying to use the term should differentiate the two but to be fair, most people don't even know about npd and therefore would only be talking about egotistical people, not nessesarily pwnpd. I also think it's nessesary to bring up that Tumblr has obscure and hyper niche veiws on topics with zero room for conversation and just as plenty of pwnpd on Tumblr are adverse to the term, there also plenty of pwnpd on Tumblr and other platforms who acknowled/support it as a term, do not take offense and/or understand its usage and what it means without direct correlation to the disorder but more as a grouping of actions/beliefs with the label outside of medical contexts. The term narcissist and the actions associated have existed as a stand alone personality type (like sloth doesn't automatically mean someone with Chronic fatigue syndrome or Thief doesn't mean kleptomaniac) long before the disorder got its name and associations, plenty of people call egoists narcissists and it's not offensive suddenly. Understanding words have multiple meanings and contexts is important here, Rape dosent even automatically mean sexual assualt, sometimes it just means steal or kidnapping. All this to say it's budding mental health related language, it will take what already exists and expand upon it. Same as when the words triggers and gaslighting got popular then promptly died. Your free to take your stance, I'm not invalidating it, I'm just sharing some facts cause as a long time user of Tumblr, it seriously screwed my views of the world and narrowed them to a pin prick about what's acceptable and agreed upon and what isn't and should be shunned. Only after stepping outside the site did I learn just how little 90% of discourse here actually matters and affects the world at large. Consider this whole part devil's advocate but presenting only the people who side with you as evidence when this isn't a "is climate change real?" Sort of stance where 98% of the field agrees is disingenuous. The field is split here and very few people are actually considering this label to specifically mean pwnpd and more mean specific forms of mental and emotional abuse and neglect that usually comes from a place where the abuser sees themselves as better than others, see the victims as threats to their high standing and see others as means to their ends. Again, Idk if I support the term or not, I'm just relaying information.

Lastly, #2, trying to say that anyone who feels they are a victim of specifically "narc abuse" is just trying to "feel special" is fucking horrific and invalidating regardless of your feelings on the term. Regardless of the words they use to describe the abuse they experienced, they still experienced abuse and trying to imply they are lieing or attention-seeking is fundamentally abuse-apologist shit. The same shit gets said to every other victim of abuse and just because you don't like the label dose not mean they think they are special or different and what they describe is suddenly not fucking abuse. They are still actively victims even if they arnt perfect ones. I'm disabled, I'm fully aware if the term "disabled abuse" came out cause a few people got beat with grandma's cane or their disabled abuser used their mobility aid to hurt them I'd be fighting it cause that's not fair and disabled only means one thing, however, I would never EVER invalidate their trauma from that physical abuse. I would never say they never experienced any wrongs or they think they are special cause it was abuse from a disabled person. No matter where you stand, that was a fucking terrible thing to say and imply. You can shit on a label without invalidating real victims of real abuse. No one in this debate was questioning the victims until you just did, they only criticized the label they were using. You can get that victim-blaming perfect-victim shit and shove it up your ass. And no, I'm not a victim of that form of abuse, if it even exists, but I can see shit when I hear it and that was shit. Shame on you for that.

Okay first thing I want to say first is this. i am sorry if u read my post and misread it or misinterpreted what i was saying. i was not victim blaming anyone lmfao. I was NOT invalidating anyone when I said those who have been abused by narcissists think theyre special. what I was trying to say is that the language around narc abuse is that victims seem to talk about it like its a worse type of abuse. i see people say "if you have been abused by a narcissist its because they saw how special u are!!" and i think thats not ok to tell victims bc victims will romantizie why they were abused!! i remember believing my abuser (who does have npd btw) only abused me bc i was so special and he hated that!! but in reality, he abused me because he's an abuser. an abuser might be triggered by someone, they might hate someone and thats why they abuse. an abuser might have a disorder that can make them react abusively, but its because theyre an abuser. there are plenty of ppl without disorders who abuse, and there are those with npd who dont also abuse. its not a hive mind.

i do not understand why u think i was telling someone that they werent abused. if u spend more than 2 seconds on my blog u will know i validate everyone who has ever been a victim, and those who will become victims.

BUT my point was there are victims out there who seem to treat narc abuse like its a badge. we dont walk around and say ptsd abuse bc ppl would lose their shit if we ever did that. "Narc abuse" is not anything different than any other kind of abuse. can an abuser have npd? yes. can the npd make an abuser respond in a unique or different way? yes same with any pd. but narc abuse is just emotional abuse. ppl will say narc abuse and then go onto explain everything that an abuser does. "Theyre selfish" "They want control" yeah thats an abuser. i think the problem is people now look at symptoms of abuse and say narcissist. i literally see ppl call anyone a narcissist these days.

the issue i have with this as well is that i have seen and heard victims wonder if they are valid because their abuser doesnt have npd bc these victim spaces especially Tiktok have created this belief that abusers are narcissists and ONLY narcissists. can they be? yes. but can an abuser also be a neurotypical? yes.

abusers are just abusers. we dont need to slap some label on there. now is there different levels of abuse? yes ofc. emotional abuse, physical, spiritual, financial, etc are all different kinds of abuse. being abused by ur mother is different than being abused by ur teacher, or partner, etc. but it doesnt mean its worse. ofc there are SITUATIONS that can be considered "worse" in the eyes of the law but at the end of the day. abuse is abuse. a broken ankle is still a broken ankle no matter how it got broken.

victims are all on the same playing field but they try to fight each other and we need to stand together and realize that abusers are the issue!! i dont have any ISSUE or problem with victims who say they were abused by a narcissist but i do have an issue when ppl say narc abuse. and i know a lot of victims who say narc abuse might not even realize what theyre saying. i remember being that person until i started to talk to pwpd, espeically npd, did more research and realized how stigmatizing it is.

the MAIN issue with saying narc abuse is that what ur saying to people with npd that 1) they are not valid if they have been abused. 2) they are abusers. this is dangerous because its generalizing an entire group of those with a disorder that can not change or fix. a lot of victims worry if they have been the abuser bc abusers fuck with ur head thinking ur the bad guy, so if someone with npd sees a post that says all narcissists are abusers they might believe they are one when they arent. im speaking very general. every person with npd is a unique person and i dont SUPPORT every single person with npd bc ofc there are monsters out there who are also abusers , but i do support that people with npd get support and are also included when ppl say mental health matters, or believe all victims.

no one is saying that those with npd cant be abusers, what were trying to change is the language !!! before people believe everyone with schizophrenia was a violent killer until we learned that is not true. we need to do the same with personality disorders.

the history of the word rape does come from the meaning to steal, seize, or carry away but there is PLENTY of words we use in today that are not the same. just look up the history of the word "mother fucker" and you will never want to ever say that ever again. but i dont see what this has to do with ur point in mental health. no one would ever say rape when they mean "steal" we just dont use that word in that way anymore. but to add to this, its a great example as a way to change the meaning of narcissists to be only used for those with the disorder. (yeah ppl can have narcisstic tendencies, we ALL have some level of it, its how we survive but thats different than having a disorder.)

i know tumblr has always had weird takes, and some stuff is strictly an online discourse and doesnt happen irl, but that doesnt mean we cant change the way people view mental health. people have misused gaslighting, triggers, but that doesn't mean we cant stop or change that. most people learn to adapt.

but to finish, i understand where ur coming from and im sorry if u saw my post and were upset but when i see others with npd wishing they could die because they feel like a monster just because they have a diagnosis, it shatters me knowing they feel like there is no support. even therapists are sketchy with pwpd. i just think that we need to change the language around abuse. just say abuse idk why thats so hard!

[derschleierfallt]

Pls share actor opinions!! :D

OK. biggest question of my life. gonna list top 3 favs for elisabeth and tod but i’ll throw in a rudolf or two. honorable mentions and least favs too just for funsies. also it’s going to be painfully obvious that i mostly stick to german language productions sorry in advance. and nothing too niche probably. maybe one day ill revise when i’ve watched like every video i have

elisabeth

1. pia douwes

OF COURSE NUMBER ONE IS PIA. she is my absolute favorite actress, not just in this role but also just in general. i first saw her in the role in the essen proshot, and how she conveyed all the different highs and lows of the character was just so good. you can feel every emotion and you can believe every word. i had watched the 2005 vienna proshot first, and i liked it a lot, but it wasn’t until i saw pia in the titular role that everything really clicked. her understanding of the character is so compelling, and i literally just don’t get tired of it. she’s also an absolute powerhouse vocally. hoping to go to the netherlands next year to see her in the show for real!

2. ranno hana

okaaayy i haven’t watched zuka 2014 in a BIT but… ok confession… i don’t love zukabeth. i like it enough, but a lot of the changes are just tooo hard for me to completely forgive lol. that said, i’ve watched a few productions, and this one was a standout for me, mostly bc of this elisabeth (and tod tbh but this isn’t abt them rn). i really loved her portrayal of the character, acting-wise i think she’s seriously incredible. vocally she’s not exactly a favorite, but like who gaf. she’s GOOD! her wenn ich tanzen will is one of my favorites, as is her ich gehor nur mir. so fun to watch

3. maya hakvoort

don’t be fooled even though vienna 2005 didn’t completely hook me at first i do like maya a lot. in terms of character, i think maya plays it a little more broken and beaten, which is an interpretation of the character i love. she’s crushing under all this weight, and though she remains strong, she really really shows all the cracks that form. her der schleier fallt with mate always makes me wanna bash my head in (in a really good way!)

honorable mentions

nicole sieger. kind of. only shitty audios exist of her performance but i like them a lot lol

mari hanafusa (toho 2016) didn’t love her in zuka 96 but she’s really good here

ruth kraus. recently watched a video with her and i liked it a lot! seen some people say she’s lacking but i don’t believe it

not my fav

maike boerdam. not sure if this is like a hot or cold or middling take? personally not a fan of her elisabeth, some of the acting choices take me out of it and while she’s talented, her singing just isn’t my thing! she has good moments though and she is in many great essen photos and i do love essen promo photos

der tod

1. uwe kröger

92 vienna specifically. this is The tod. u cannot say the word death without me thinking of that swoopy 90s hair. u can’t talk abt some random guy named todd without me thinking of that swoopy 90s hair. he lives in my head and i cant evict him. i love other interpretations of the character and while i dont like to be all THIS IS THE ONE CORRECT WAY TO PLAY THIS AND THIS… this is the most correct in my heart. i love the ambiguity so much. i think its essential. most vienna tods from this era just don’t really captivate me as much as uwe bc i think the bar was set so high (and vienna content is SCARCE to say the least). i like him in essen as well, but the way the character was directed in that production isssss inferior imo. he’s got good elisabeth takes too so number one

2. jesper tydén

i really don’t know how this happened. i really really just like his tod. depending on the day i think he could switch with mate. i get the vibe that his tod is a conniving little beyotch. slimy, maybe is the way to put it? but not exactly as gross as slimy would suggest? unhinged, but not flying off the handle? calculated, but not fully controlled? i think it’s also the vocals that bump him up for me, he’s got some GOOD vocals that really get to shine in this role. i do also just really love essen understudies for some reason

3. máté kamarás

like i said he can swap for jesper but today is a jesper in 2 day. for me, mate is more the acting and not so much vocals, at least later in the vienna revival run and every production onward. i do love his voice earlier on though, so it’s a shame his voice kinda suffered a bit! maybe this kinda sounds like a diss or something but ITS NOT. i think mate tod is really captivating, there’s this vibe that the impossible really did happen, he really did love elisabeth, and he plays it very well. he bounces off of the other actors incredibly (vienna revival im specifically thinking about), so every interaction with every character has something just sooo good about it. i also like how sparkly he is in hungarian productions

honorable mentions

yu shirota. see my post abt him being a freak. love it!

addo kruizinga. specifically in original vienna, i actually didn’t like him at first but his interpretation really grew on me

lukas mayer. so happy to see a new tod i actually really like show up, i hope we’ll see him in this role again

5. least fav

m….ma……r…….k… coldest take on tumblr dot com possibly ever! every performance i’ve seen he just looks so bored or so done. however i think he’s good vocally, and im sure he is better in other shows. but in elisabeth he’s bored and im bored, so not for me!

rudolf

1. andreas bieber

number one is all original vienna i’m sorry LOL it’s andreas bieber. wenn ich dein spiegal wär was written because of him (or something like that), so i think that says something! not sure how exactly to put this but i like how ? pitiful ? his rudolf is LMFAO. when i was just getting into elisabeth and browsing through youtube clips i didn’t understand whatsoever his rendition of the aforementioned song struck a chord with me. no clue what he could’ve possibly been singing about, didn’t even know the historical context lol, but i could infer enough from his acting and it was SAD. seeing mayerling for the first time when actually watching the musical in full was like ohhh…

honorable mentions (tbh i didn’t focus on rudolf much until recently so sorry)

jesper tydén AGAIN. sorry he’s good. i wish he was in the vienna revival longer than he was

dennis hupka. part of the reason why i care abt rudolf more now LOLOLOL

also to end it off serkan is obviously my fav lucheni alongside i think 99.9% of people and i have no more to say than that. serkan is the standard for me and it has not been reached again… not that my eyes have seen… except maybe that guy who was the one thing i liked abt schonbrunn 2019 but i don’t remember his name atm

[murderbot-moodboard]

A few weeks ago, someone on here shared their playlist of songs they thought Murderbot might listen to, which I thought was a really cool idea. (If you're the person whose post that was, you have great music taste! Please feel free to comment and remind me who you are!) And that gave me the idea earlier to make a short Spotify playlist of songs that I feel like could generally be talking about parts of TMBD, whether from Murderbot's perspective or not.

The playlist is called "Murderbot Mood" (couldn't resist the consistent branding, lol). As it says in the description, these are "songs that sound like specific aspects of TMBD or adjacent vibes (your mileage may vary)." It's a mix of some older and recent classics, plus a few niche gems I've discovered over the years that I think are seriously underrated.

I did a little curating of the order but not a lot. And again, I just created it yesterday, so it's on the short side. I guess I wanted to share it because music is important to me (and has kept me alive over the years) but I've never gotten to talk about it much with other people? Idk, I grew up super conservative and wasn't allowed to listen to a lot of popular stuff, so I didn't discover most of my favorite songs until I became an adult, and I'm still acquiring new favorites that most people my age grew up listening to (such as *NSYNC). But anyway, if you're interested, here's a preview of the first several songs, followed by the Spotify link.

[happymetalgirl]

Blood Incantation - Absolute Elsewhere

Blood Incantation is not the only band or the first band to make death metal progressive and spacy and cerebral, but across their now four-album discography they definitely have developed a signature style and ethos within that already niche sub-subgenre, an ethos of imaginative existential musing on the biggest fundamental questions of our species: the nature of the universe, the origin of life, the extent of the cosmos, the possibility of other life, etc. This existential speculation the band engages in is not done super self-seriously, as was exemplified by their widely lauded 2019 LP, Hidden History of the Human Race, which dabbled playfully (I hope) in the idea of humanity being placed on Earth by another species. Ancient Aliens death metal. The record even came with a little pamphlet on opening your third eye and discovering the truth of the universe and all.

I've never got the sense from the band that they're super true believers in this kind conspiratorial thinking, at least not in a committed way; I didn't get the vibe from Hidden History that they were actually trying to evangelize some flat-Earth-level type of alternative theory of human existence of whatever, even with the pamphlet. If anything, the pamphlet seemed like a tongue-in-cheek touch and an adjunctive component to the imaginative world-building the band was engaging in. It seemed more about building an immersive fantasy and stimulating grandiose speculating than about pushing some specific hairbrained conspiracy theory. That said, even most conspiracy theorists don't hold their wacky beliefs with such confidence that they dare express them publicly outside forums and comment sections, because those beliefs are more of an emotional crutch for not understanding the massive and complicated world around us and validating whatever biases they have, like what religion is functionally for most people who subscribe to one.

And somehow (ownership of new media and legacy media being gradually consolidated in the hands of a disparately wealthy few who actively thumb the scales of algorithms to favor the spread of anti-class-conscious information like right-wing propaganda and conspiracy theories to prevent any type of threat to their wealth and power that working class solidarity might pose, capitalism) conspiracy theories are a real actual sociopolitical ill that we have to contend with seriously now, with actual batshit true believers like Marjorie Taylor-Greene and RFK Jr. and more than a handful who've unironically pondered "the Jewish question" now holding higher office and shaping policy in the federal government of the most economically and militarily powerful country in the world. It's so awesome that we have to take fucking "globalists starting wildfires to promote 15-minute cities" type bullshit seriously now.

Mark Bankston, the lawyer prosecuting Alex Jones for his defamation of the parents of the victims of the Sandy Hook Elementary school shooting, lamented frustratedly that conspiracy theories used to be fun, benign little thought experiments in the fantastical and absurd that he felt like people back in his day could engage with in good fun and not actually become so seriously sucked into, and now in the age of the internet consolidated onto a handful of social media platforms they're a weapon of anti-progressive propaganda. This has been a slow-building phenomenon, and it's not like InfoWars wasn't a major cog of the right-wing misinformation machine back in 2019. But it's so much worse now, and with the trajectory the U.S. is on in the wake of the election and the cabinet nominees being assembled, it's likely going to become an unprecedently severe problem.

All this is to say, do I think Blood Incantation (or anyone) dabbling in the mushroom-tripping vibes of space-alien existentialism with a flair of mystical thinking is worsening a serious problem of anti-intellectualism with this kind of artistry or even just doing so in bad taste? I would say no. Sure, satire is dead in an era in which it's indistinguishable from the genuine expression it satirizes, but I don't think in the context of a genre of music (death metal) that has always held ties to the cartoonish and fantastical and made very clear its fictional nature, that what Blood Incantation is doing is really normalizing or legitimizing "Jewish space laser" horseshit. Old songs with (at the time) relatively innocuous lyrics about Trump being a rich and brash public figure as more of a character archetype than anything he is now have soured more than I think Hidden History of the Human Race ever will to my ears. And that IS definitely in part due to the TYPE of conspiracy theory being toyed with, which is just the silly ancient aliens stuff that's kinda too esoteric to be tied into sociopolitical conspiracy and weaponized like holocaust denialism or something. The band stick firmly to the realm of discussions held while hot-boxing in pizza delivery vehicles after shift ends, and five years after Hidden History, they're still focused mainly on what's going on in the stars and beyond.

The cover of Absolute Elsewhere hints at a continuation of the same alien historicism, with a clearing of the crater-riddled surface of some mysterious planet with two moons in its starlit sky somehow decorated with two of the same types of pyramids of Giza. Comprised of two central compositions each divided into three tracks, it really is an album of two halves in the thematic sense though. While "The Stargate" picks up right where "Awakening from the Dream of Existence to the Multidimensional Nature of Our Reality (Mirror of the Soul)" left off in terms of grand celestial projection, the lyrics of the album's second hemisphere are surprisingly grounded, at least in the sense that the grandiose existentialism is turned inward. It's actually surprising how direct the message of "The Message" is in the album's last 23 minutes in its humanism. The band don't break the fourth wall or anything, but even in mystical character the answers they give to the age-old questions on the meaning of life and consciousness and humanity are not the least bit cryptic. "To create." "To give." "generosity". "sow peace through deeds." "To grow beyond the animal instinct to fight." I don't know if the concerns I laid out earlier about conspiracy and anti-intellectualism taking hold of power had anything to do with their rationale or thought process for doing so, but I am glad that Blood Incantation did decide make a concrete statement at least about the purpose of the types of intergalactic thought experiments they engage in, which is not to uncover ancient secrets or expose the lizard people or any of those other harmful distractions from our obligation to support our fellow human and cherish the possibly rare and unique life present on the Earth.

As for the music... the scope of the subject matter of Absolute Elsewhere is matched in breadth with the scope of the style and composition of the instrumentals behind it. It's not just that the band employ these spacier psychedelic passages inspired by 70's prog rock between careening passages of death metal, and it's not just that they manage to tap Tangerine Dream for the second "tablet" of "The Stargate", it's the intentionality of the long-winding compositions and the way these elements are woven so thoughtfully together, with wonderful little memorable motifs of guitar and orchestral synth builds making it more than just the novelty of the combination of ingredients at play here. That said, more than any individual riff or sweet clean guitar passage, the tight symbiosis of death metal with 70's new age music and space rock is the real masterclass here that really brings the extraterrestrial introspection home. There's not really a way to easily get into the highlights of finer details of such a seamless album without it becoming tedious or spoiling, but I can at least heap massive praise on the accomplishment made here in the immersiveness into the huge scope of the subject matter here made possible by the meticulous and crisp production of each piece of the album, whose varied individual components must have been a real puzzle to mix and master.

I remember when I was hearing so much hype about Blood Incantation before Hidden History and then hearing that album and becoming a believer; I think Absolute Elsewhere could easily be that album for the unconverted because it really is a masterpiece of a progressive and grandiose compositional approach to death metal with some of the most natural integration of disparate styles ever. I love this album, and as impressive as it is from Blood Incantation, it's no surprise that they could reach even higher than Hidden History of the Human Race and that they could make so many diverse sounds work so well together. If you're not a believer all I can really say is look into it yourself, open your third eye.

9/10

[free-luigi-mangione]

We seriously do need a talk about people treating him like an object for their amusement and a sex toy basically, it's not new, it's been happening since December but the antics have been upped by a lot (maybe they were always there at this level )and I didn't notice.

People don't care about him just the an abstract idea of him. So they think they can say anything without consequences because the consequences won't be on them, it will be on him regardless of the fact that he doesn't even know these people exist. Stop treating him like a kpop idol ( even they don't deserve this ), y'all can't be playing with other people's lives to satisfy your own ego and then go sleep on your beds while they are in one of the worst places in the country.

While we're at this topic, I'm gonna go on full offence mode here about Tumblr Luigi niche too, nothing personal but the things that have left bad taste in my mouth. A few days back, there was a post going around now women know how to see Luigi as a person instead of an object because "women's gaze" and that's just pure bs, women as everything we have seen throughout these 4 months are as abhorrent as men.

While we're on the topic, I don't hate real person fanfictions as a whole, I do read them even, but if your blog is just full of pretending he is your S/O and you don't concern yourself with the case and his actual situation then you don't care about him as a human. You don't get to pretend everything is fine for your comfort when the actual person is in inhumane conditions behind bars. People like to sugarcoat this fact but no matter how much fine he says he is ( he has to say this, the other option is they throw him into solitary or suicide watch citing "he said he wasn't keeping well" ) a disabled man with multiple health conditions with little access to good medical services with the pressure of 3 cases + death hanging over his head isn't happily living in a place where healthy people develope multiple health conditions and where all kinds of abuse is rampant.

i agree with everything in the first two paragraphs and about the third paragraph i believe that person meant that most men only look at women and objectify while this is not the case for women. most women (although not all, and there's definitely creepy people among Luigi's supporters too) however see a person as themselves and then maybe find them attractive, it is not seeing them as an object and just as a sex toy to vent their sexual frustration on. in fact, objectification never happens here at all, it's just being attracted to a person as a whole not just a very specific idea of them in someone's head. but yes, in recent months, we've seen exactly how many women have behaved insanely and simply objectified him and never seen him as a real human being and a real person. this is of course problematic when those people are ready to jeopardize his cases just for themselves. because they do not seem to be able to understand that their actions only endanger him while they continue to live their happy lives as free citizens. i do wish and hope everybody involved in all this is actually talking about the cases against him and what it could potentially mean for him in the long run.

and yes, Luigi is forced to say he's doing fine. because so much as a breath in the wrong direction implying he's not alright would get him put in active suicide watch or solitary confinement, for as long as the COs determine that he is a danger to himself. this is terribly inhumane but it happens and is a contributing factor as to why inmates often have issues that they cannot and do not speak of, for fear of facing worse conditions while in custody.

[tallsuperstar]

Literally out of nowhere I found this show called Jentry Chau vs the Underworld and like. I am having so many thoughts about this show. In like a "I have an intense need to analyze the writing of every show I ever watch" way. I'm 5/13 episodes in so I will hold off my final verdict until I finish. But some of my thoughts so far:

- I feel the need to say that this show had all the set up for a monster of the week formula about a teenage girl sending demons back to the underworld, with the protag slowly learning to control her powers and why she has them. This is not what it does. I'm not saying that it would be better or worse if it was, it just gives off the impression that that was what was going to be the plot in episode 1.

-The show is at a breakneck pace, with both the audience and the characters learning things way faster than I ever would have expected them to. This really feels like the result of it being a Netflix cartoon, where they knew the uncertainty of getting a season 2, so they opted to try cramming everything into a single season.

-Why is Micheal designed exactly like Shaggy from that one Velma show that everyone hates, but with a black shirt instead of a green one??? Seriously it feels weird bc Stella, Jentry, Kit, and Gigi all feel like completely unique characters design-wise.

-STELLA GET BEHIND ME I WILL TREAT YOU BETTER

-The korean/texan influence is everywhere in this show (despite the fact that one of the main characters is a moguai, which I'm pretty sure is a chinese thing and not korean? But I know next to nothing abt korean mythology so I could be wrong). And I get that. The episode where they go to San Antonio and have to fight against soliders from the Alamo who are possessing the students to reenact the event was fucking WEIRD. In so many ways.

-This show will be incredibly outdated in a few years. Some of the jokes already are

-This feels negative because it's easier to complain than compliment, but Jentry is a TREAT of a character. I love her. The entire scene where she is trying to talk to the vice principle about enrolling and getting incredibly nervous about how the town has taken an obbsession with the "demon girl" from 8 years ago is actually so fun. I love how much she struggles with her powers, both with them being uncontrollable sometimes and how much she hates having them. Jentry's "I never asked to be born with special powers" thing works better for her than it does in some other media I've seen because the powers are an active detriment to her, and always has been, so of ocurse she doesn't want them. She destroyed half her town, she nearly kills her best friend, she burns people who get too close. Everyone is actively scared of her—not just the humans, but her strength is unparalleled to the demons as well. It's fascinating, tho I do wish that we had at least another episode before the school heard her "You don't want to know what I'm capable of" threat so that we could establish a status quo before breaking it.

-This is another show in the very specific niche of it using unconventional music for its soundtrack and I am HERE for it. Taking a not from Moon Girl and Kipo, but it using k-pop and such instead since the MC is korean rather than the hip-hop of the other shows I mentioned. I prob prefer those other two only because I love hip-hop a lot more than k-pop.

[aogram]

Cindered Legends - (Prisoner 007) Aeana First Trial Voice Drama

Read under the cut! No TWs apply.

A door opens, but a voice is heard before the sound of the scraping chair comes.

Aeana:

“And so the warden entered the interrogation room with a deafening, insufferable creak. It seemed that the entire castle was poorly built—truly pathetic, considering how seriously everyone was taking the whole ordeal.”

A chair scrapes on the ground, followed by a cough.

Verus:

Prisoner 007. 

Aeana:

“They looked drained from the previous interrogation, which would surprise absolutely nobody who had spent even a few moments in the presence of 006.”

Verus:

This isn’t the time for… whatever you’re attempting to do.

Aeana:

“And yet still, they tried to intimidate their guest, standing tall and speaking tersely. All it truly accomplished was making them look uniquely pitiful, clutching at authority that they had not the power to wield.”

Verus:

Aeana Ignis.

Aeana:

Pulling out my full name, are we? You’ll have to try harder than that to scare me.

Verus:

I’m not trying to scare you. I’m trying to begin your interrogation.

Aeana:

Then by all means, get on with it. You’re the all-powerful warden, are you not?

Verus:

I’m not all-powerful. Cooperate, and neither of us will be forced to continue this unpleasant exchange.

Aeana:

Are interrogations meant to be enjoyable in your farcical little world?

Verus:

I’d prefer if it weren’t actively painful, at the very least. I’ve already mentioned your name, but state your age and occupation.

Aeana:

I’m a bard. A storyteller, more specifically, although that isn’t the only sort of performing you do.

Verus:

A storyteller? That’s a profession?

Aeana:

A niche one. Some call it a dying craft, but I’ll solve that problem when it arises and no sooner.

Verus:

And your age?

Aeana:

Around yours.

Verus:

Around mine?

Aeana:

I’m 32. You’re in that general area too, are you not?

Verus:

I’m not entirely sure how you guessed it, but I suppose there’s no harm in confirming that you’re right.

Aeana:

Perfect. Now that I know we’ve got similar levels of life experience, I’ll drop the formalities, Verus.

Verus:

Very well.

Aeana:

So get to the point. Ask and I’ll answer.

Verus:

Well… how are you adjusting to life at the prison?

Aeana:

Well enough, I suppose. The castle is drafty, but no worse than any inn I’ve stayed at.

Verus:

And that’s all you have to say about it?

Aeana:

I’m not going to whine like some of the people here. The conditions here are… adequate.

Verus:

Right. And are you like… this… with all of the other prisoners?

Aeana:

Did you think I was saving this attitude just for you? You aasimar truly are egotistical.

Verus:

So… yes.

Aeana:

Naturally.

Verus:

Building off of that, I can’t imagine you get on particularly well with anyone here.

Aeana:

I don’t “get on” with them at all, if I can help it. The few who were foolish enough to talk to me early on have since learned to avoid that—most of them, anyways.

Verus:

And those few are…?

Aeana:

Drizzt Do’Urden’s much more annoying cousin, for one. I’m pleased to report that he’s since ceased attempting to speak with me.

Verus:

He mentioned you. Said that you have a “complicated relationship.”

Aeana:

Hah. The only thing that’s complicated is the route that he’s forced to take through the castle when he knows there’s a chance of encountering me on his usual path.

Verus:

And who else has tried to talk to you?

Aeana:

001, the Knight… former… whatever she is. The child. 010. And Elmwood.

Verus:

I don’t see a problem with any of them. Aside from the last, possibly.

Aeana:

Am I meant to praise your openmindedness?

Verus:

No. You’re meant to explain the issue.

Aeana:

I’ve been requested to tell stories of the drow time and time again. He always sounded like a self-righteous bastard when I researched him, but in person? He lives up to every insufferable legend. And yet he’s a murderer? It’s intriguing, but not enough so for me to actually brave his company.

Verus:

And Renata?

Aeana:

A knight. I would assume that she’s no stranger to killing, which leads me to consider just what exactly made this one different. A particularly abhorrent murder, perhaps? And yet she goes on helping people around the castle, as if a few good deeds are enough to cancel out her grievous sin.

Verus:

And by “the child”, do you mean 008?

Aeana:

Yes.

Verus:

I haven’t yet met him.

Aeana:

You’ll like him. He’s obedient, simpleminded. It’ll feed your little ego nicely.

Verus:

010?

Aeana:

A druid. Thinks he’s far more important than he is because he’s a few centuries older than most of us. A ridiculous, sentimental sap with a uniquely grating presence.

Verus:

…

Aeana:

You’re not going to ask about Elmwood?

Verus:

It’s easy to understand why one would dislike him.

Aeana: 

So you do have a functioning brain. Anything else?

Verus:

You’ve answered efficiently and not gone off track, aside from the very… demeaning bit at the beginning. We’ve time to talk about anything, unless you’re actually willing to open up about your crime.

Aeana:

And you’ll actually believe what I say about it?

Verus:

Within reason, I suppose.

Aeana:

And by “within reason”, you mean if it fits your narrow preconception of what a prisoner “should” say, correct?

Verus:

…excuse me?

Aeana:

I ended a life. So did everyone here. That’s an incontrovertible fact. But if the details of that fact don’t line up with what you expect me to say, you’ll throw them out and replace them with whatever fantasy you’ve produced in your deluded little mind.

Verus:

Try me, then. Tell me what you did.

Aeana:

I’m responsible for the death of a young boy. A child. He died in a truly spectacular display of idiocy brought on by lies I fed him—for no particular reason, actually. I don’t feel a particularly great amount of regret over the whole matter. Do you believe me?

Verus:

…

Aeana:

You don’t, do you? Because why would I tell you that?

Verus:

Why would you tell me that?

Aeana:

Because you asked. Am I not meant to answer your questions?

Verus:

You are. But I don’t expect anyone to incriminate themselves so directly.

Aeana:

It’s only incriminating if they know that they’re undoubtedly deserving of condemnation. I’d argue that it’s more suspicious to remain quiet, as if they’ve something to hide.

Verus:

I haven’t gotten that impression from most of the others. I doubt they’re thinking that deep into it when they hide things.

Aeana:

Then their manipulations are working. They’ve successfully convinced you as to their supposed “goodness”, if only due to the absence of evil that is in turn due to the absence of information. Your mind fills in the blanks based on how they’ve presented themselves to you.

Verus:

005 tried to tell me about her crime.

Aeana:

But did she succeed?

Verus:

No. I stopped her.

Aeana:

She’s a strong-willed girl. If she truly wanted you to know, she would have gone out and said it even if you protested. The same goes for everyone here.

Verus:

You truly think that?

Aeana:

Truly. Not a single one has been honest, which I think is unforgivable in and of itself.

Verus:

So that’s your position? Everyone at this prison is guilty?

Aeana:

When did I say everyone at this prison?

Verus:

It was implied. I made an educated guess.

Aeana:

What you made was an egregious leap of logic. I said that everyone who’s hiding things from you deserves to be condemned. Everyone who didn’t come out directly and say what they did—not that I have much hope that you believe me.

Verus:

And if I do believe you? What about your crime was forgivable?

Aeana:

Who knows? I’ve filled you in on the broad strokes, but it’s up to you to decide. I can give you the full, unabridged version, if you’d like.

Gears begin to grind as the platform starts to lower.

Verus:

…as much as I’d like to hear it, it’s time for your extraction. The others were right about you—you’re certainly difficult.

Aeana:

I was more useful than all of the other prisoners combined. If you don’t know it now, you’ll realize it later.

Verus:

I sincerely doubt that. Any final comments? Anything you can say to actually be helpful before this interrogation ends?

Aeana:

Nobody at this prison is a good person. Myself included. But at least I’m open about it. That ought to win me some points, no?

A sigh.

Verus:

I think all the points you’ve won from that have been negated by your attitude. Prisoner 007, get ready to sing your sins.

---

Read Aeana's first trial MV Transcript here

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