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Codex entry of the loyalist Space Marine Chapter "The Ember Nomads"
Summary: thanks to @cardinalcanis and their blog about their custom 40k Chapter (I cannot understate how much I own this user I've just met for giving me the idea of rambling about my hyperfixations here) I will be posting here everything there is to know about my characters of the 40k universe and (hopefully) interact with other users about their own hyperfixations and make my little goblin brain go feral for knowledge.
So this is too, in a way, an invitation for all of you readers that thankfully are able to see this post...lemme share ideas with you! Let me enter in your precious brain and admire your works! Let's share info about our characters, write about them with each other and have fun! (Of course with rightful credit to original owners and all that bureaucratic understandable guidelines)
Tagged goblins (affectionate) that wish to learn more (so far!): @cardinalcanis
This codex may seem a bit barren and kinda simple, fear not it was like that intentionally, very intentionally....not at all because I was nervous and copy-pasted from my notes on my cellphone and because I am not the most aesthetic pleasant person ever...ahem....ONWARDS WITH THE INFO!!!
Battle Cry
"Die with a smile, live with the wind!"
Number
Approximately 900-860
Founding
11th foundation (also known as the "cursed foundation" in Imperial records)
Successors of
White Scars
Successor Chapters
None
Chapter Master
Haseyr Stormblood
Primarch
Jagathai Khan
Homeworld
Cthonipem XI
Strength
Optimally operational
Special Tactics
Rapid deployment, hit-and-run tactics, enemy leader headhunters
Allegiance
Imperium of Mankind
Colors of the Chapter
Pale yellow and crimson red
Image
No image available because sadly I'm a writer, not an artist, we'll just have to make due with imagination. The left pauldron and right leg of their armor are painted with the pale yellow color, as for the rest of his armor the Chapter has the crimson red color, hence the "Ember" part of their names.
Homeworld
<Cthonipem XI was a Feral World in the Galphais system, as these set of planets were close to the majority of sectors that the Imperium had trouble controlling in the Nova Terra Interregnum era (Circa 972. M35). With the rebellious traitors closing in, the creation of a new Chapter was authorized using the geneseed of the White Scars and Cthonipem XI was chosen as the perfect planet to breed this warriors. The large forests that separated the nomadic tribes from one another gave enough resources to its inhabitants to survive, but it too carried a series of dangerous animals which created hunters and warriors amongst the tribes.
Once the Chapter was born, Cthonipem was left basically untouched by the Ember Nomads as they saw how the tribes resisted all kinds of technological advances that the Imperium tried to provide them, taking it as a sign of the untamed wild spirit of their soon-to-be brothers and thus left alone. In the course of the next millenniums nothing changed in the extraction of new Adepts for the Chapter, only coming down to the world when it was time to collect the chosen few to be Astartes, thus Cthonipem has been able to maintain the same traditions, legends and deities as before the Imperium arrived.>
Summary of general behavior between battle-brothers
< Friendly, brutal and blunt by nature, the Ember Nomads have kept a reputation of being extremely proficient when it comes to end entire wars in a matter of months or even weeks; usually deployed in zones of war where the battle has been stuck in a stalemate, the Nomads strike down from the heavens and the ground together to aid the forces of Mankind. However outside of the battlefield this Marines are rather pacific, oftentimes having abilities for things such as singing, writing and craftsmanship; keeping good relationships with the allies they have made along the years. Regiments of Guardsmen are always happy to know the Ember Nomads have answered their calls for help, since it's a clear sign the war will end very soon and the fellow guardsman will have warm occasions with the "happy brutal giants" on their side.
Aside from the rest of their brothers, the Librarians of the Chapter do not share the same amount of hospitality with strangers that their fellow brothers have, usually casting themselves aside from social activities and having certain levels of secrecy between them. The "Witchers of the Wind", as they are called by the Nomads, prefer to only socialize amongst themselves, whenever they speak with their brothers everyone remains silent and listens very carefully to every word or litany they say, for they know the past of the Chapter, what will happen in the future and what actions to take in order to ensure the best outcome possible in every situation. >
General physical appearance
<Having absorbed many of the culture and traditions from Cthonipem XI, the Nomads paint their bodies with tattoos representing key moments in their life as the Astartes climbs the heriarchy of their Chapter, is normal to see bones or other sorts of trinkets hanging from their armors too as they think it'll give them the favor of the Emperor in whatever task they set to accomplish. The second company is the one that has more "savage like" imagery on their equipment; adorning their helmets with animal skulls, painting their bikes with designs of the cave paintings found in their homeworld, placing multiple trinkets in their weapons and generally having a much more hostile or violent demeanour than their brethren.
Each veteran of the Chapter is tasked with creating one full song about their life, going from the moment they were chosen to be Astartes up until the last big event on their lives, these songs many times have lengths of a couple of minutes per battle brother, but the chiefs of the Chapter, the Chapter Master, Chief Librarian and Technomarine Scholar, have been noted to have at least 6 minutes each on their songs and the time keeps increasing the longer these mighty figures have remained alive. >
Preffered Enemy and Special Tactics
<Created at first to fight against heretics and traitors of the Imperium, the Ember Nomads saw their first decades of life fighting against this enemies of Mankind, always remaining true to tactics that could provide them with the right amount of speed, strategy and improvisation as well in the battlefield. The Nomads preferred method of engaging the enemy is through their Jetbikes and Land Speeders to cause confusion and bloodshed in the enemy forces, gathering in the process as much Intel as possible to then strike with all of the strength and speed of the Nomads, in this final assault is when the ancient Dreadnoughts are awakened or more heavy-support units are used, marking the end of the battle in many occasions or, in the rare case the enemy survives this massive wave of firepower from the Ember Nomads, a turning point of the war which likely won't last long.
To such a display of power, the Chaos forces are likely to be entirely crushed. However there are a few warbands that have survived their first encounters with the Chapter. These are the "Unending Hatred" and "The Fractured Hosts" Chaos forces, commanded by Guul Thavas (Nightlord) and Arellian Menus (Iron Warriors respectively; which have become the sworn enemies of the Chapter and had been the center of many battles fought against these Chaos warbands. >
Important historic Chapter figure
<Kanjaghol was one of first savages to be turned into Space Marines, with his hair tied in a ponytail and the stare of a hawk was the first to know about the advance of the heretics on his solar system and urged his superiors to do something; when the answer was negative because the Nomads weren't yet in a stable strength to go into battle Kanjaghol in a fit of rage went against orders and took a small team of 100 Astartes and went to the borders of his system to defend it.
Kanjaghol managed to keep the heretics scattered and disoriented long enough for his brothers to gain enough strength to aid him in battle; for the indomitable heart and the stubbornness displayed Kanjaghol was named Master of the 1st company and would keep the title until his death at the hand of Guul Thavas a couple of decades later. >
Current Chapter Master
<Haseyr started as a common Jetbike rider on the 9th company, with his long beard and short hair he was unremarkable on the campaigns he took part of, naturally ascending the ranks as any other battle-brother would; however his keen eye for improvisation and discursive capabilites were displayed first at the death of the 2nd Company captain as he took the bike of his fallen commander and regrouped the company leading it to a unexpected victory against the Chaos Champion Arellian Menus and its warband who retreated to the Immaterium being closely chased by Haseyr forces. Since that day on the Nomad swore upon his fallen brothers bring the head of Arellian back to Cthonipem as a trophy showing nobody escaped the wrath of the Ember Nomads. On this unstoppable hunt Haseyr was able to be promoted to the Chapter Master of the Nomads and since then he has become the prime example of the savage, religious and friendly nature of the Ember Nomads>
Quote of renown
<An always drawn-out blade eventually loses it's edge, the man that lives only for war is dammed to lose against his own bloodthirst. We must be the sword drawn at the right time, the man prepared for the right war, the indomitable wind of the East! >
#Ember Nomads#custom warhammer chapter#OC space marines#warhammer 40000#wh40k oc#my writing#fanfic writing#White Scars#seriously how the hell do I tag all this#warhammer headcanon#fanfic#warhammer fanfic
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Chat have we discussed drunk chess with cherik cause i just think. That would be the darnedest silliest thing they could do
#xmen#xmen first class#xmen dofp#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#snap chats#sorry still thinking about dofp and i reminded myself of the plane scene#the idea of drunk chess sounds so stupid fun i wish i could play drunk chess#‘snap how do you play drunk chess’ simple !!!! every piece you lose you take a shot#anyway i think itd be silly …….#id like to do something with that idea but i still have to decide on execution#omg xmen fandom hasnt seen my twelve million ‘i wanna draw this so bad’ tags yet#but yeah i sy tht a lot </3 so many things i wanna draw all the time#either that or write …. but i draw more#i love comic makin. and i blame these damned comics for gettin me into it what tha hell !!!#ok im done rambling i wish i had more to say but i dont#i lied i do. this doesnt have to be after erik apologizes on the plane this could be lit any damn time they play#i just live for the progression of them Trying to play semi seriously for a solid twenty minutes before they lose it#and now they wont stop giggling and being stupid asses#theyre still trying to play but ‘trying’ is doing a lot of heavy lifting#imagine it with me chat … itd be so beautiful i could cry frankly#ok my classes are done for today im gonna sit in my room and think of cherik#maybe ill TRY to draw this … if not then def somethin at least
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wanna ask how you feel about the eridan bpd headcanon/theory(?? not sure what to call it!) you're so good at your character analysis and i'd love to see your outlook on it
Since I don't have a degree or any formal training in psychology, I feel deeply uncomfortable diagnosing characters. I've made an autism joke before but only because I'm on the spectrum. He's definitely traumatized and anxious, but I mean those as descriptors of his behavior rather than capital-D Diagnoses. I try to focus on those when I can - the cause and effect of cognition, self-image, and behavior - and those factors may very well match up with DSM criteria, but I try not to touch an actual diagnosis with a ten foot pole unless the author has explicitly stated that X character has Y condition.
#there's a variety of reasons for this#part of it is that im GROSSLY unqualified to be handing out diagnoses when it takes a full on PhD to do that in real life#part of it is that psychology is inchoate and we are still very much in murky waters#for example: complex ptsd isn't even IN the DSM yet#and iirc my therapist told me it was because theyre still figuring out how to classify it (attachment disorder? trauma disorder? etc.)#part of it is that (from my limited and undereducated understanding) there are diagnoses that you can assign by completing a checklist...#but some that require a hell of a lot more testing and ruling out other potential causes#and the cluster-b personalities are (IIRC) not even ones you're supposed to diagnose minors with#bc of fears of self fulfilling prophecy and because minors in general are still developing personalities In General#and like the fact that i can't say that with authority speaks to how unqualified i am to do any diagnosing right? hahaha#and part of it is just because like#unless the story is specifically About That and the author has stated so explicitly#i think diagnosing characters tends to put blinders on analysis#like if i were to seriously go 'eridan is autistic' then it would massively bias my reading and understanding of his character#and we have 0 indication that eridan was ever explicitly intended to be autistic or that the author was trying to do an autism specifically#that doesn't mean that the reading is invalid because like thats what death of the author means#all readings are technically valid including stuff the author didn't necessarily intend#but that's just not the way i like to engage with media and not the way i like to approach character analysis#because PERSONALLY it just feels kind of reductive - but also -#i'd wager MOST of us don't have degrees in psychology#so when i say 'X character has Y condition' it might mean something totally different to somebody reading my analysis#even people who have Y condition aren't exempt because a lot of mental illnesses differ from person to person#whereas if i explain “X character has Y thoughts and Z behaviors” there's no ambiguity in that#eridan struggles with noticing that people are suffering and with realizing that he should care#at least part of this is due to his horrific murder-filled upbringing which rendered empathy a detriment & so he learned to ignore it#it could be autism - but it could also be trauma -#or he might just be Like That without actually meeting the diagnostic criteria for autism#& you can't even technically be diagnosed with C-PTSD#or maybe he has a burgeoning personality disorder but you aren't supposed to DX those too early anyway#or maybe hes just 13. see what i mean hahaha. ive reached the 30 tag limit
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CAMPBELL BAIN U MEAN EVERYTHING TO ME I LOVE YOU!!!!!!
fun extras since this took me FOREVER!!
anddd finally, here's a playlist of the music I listened to while working on this! it's definitely not my usual tunes but I swear I was just so much more productive and better at drawing him when I switched to these hahaha
#🎶I wanna hold ur haaanddd I wanna hold ur hand🎶#I didn't even know I could draw like this??? campbell bain you've made me a better artist#TRACKPAD ARTISTS FOR THE WIN!!!!!#I seriously don't think I would've been able do this if I hadn't used my school's shitty mac laptop to draw it lol#smth smth about how low the mouse sensitivity is combined with how bloody hard you have to press down plus low expectations#also ik they're not actually all that accurate but I just wanted to try smth new while still havin fun#campbell bain#takin' over the asylum#takin over the asylum#bloody hell why does this fandom have three separate tags for one show#I'm only usin the first two THERE IS NO G LOSERS!!#takin’ over the asylum#<- I'm actually about to lose my shit WHY IS THERE TWO OF THE SAME TAG WTF!!!!!!!!!!#I hope you can feel my absolutely bewildered outrage over this issue#I clicked on that thinkin it was the first tag#it was NOT#campbell bain fanart#takin over the asylum fanart#my art: oil paint pawsteps 🐾
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spicy cyphmen wip go wheeeeeee
#seriously how do you deal with layers and all that#i cannot keep them straight for the life of me#what the hell is color theory and how to i use it#how do i shade things#how does lighting work???#i also need to get better at anatomy if im gonna make The Spicy happen#digital is so crazy there’s all these fun tools apparently#valorant#cypher valorant#cyphmen#shadowire#omen valorant#cypher#cypher/omen#fanart#omen#should i tag this as smut?#probably?
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who up traveling they octopath
[ID: 2 images. the first is a whisper post of a cowboy sitting sadly with his elbows resting on his knees and his head in one of his hands. the caption is "is it really possible for a emo girl and a country boy to be in a relationship?" the second is a traditionally sketched redraw of alfyn from octopath traveler in the same pose. the text has been cut out from the original photo and overlaid. end ID.]
#was going to post this tomorrow but i got one like on the 'do you promise to fuck with my mid meme art' post preceding it. so here it is now#id added#octopath#octopath traveler#once again sorry for maintag crimes but none of my followers played this game 👍👍#lmao do i tag alfion. thats what i had in mind if you dont see my vision#also directors commentary. why is his outfit so complicated you didnt need to do all that bro#look up fully rendered art of everyone. think about how YOU would draw his knee high boots#seriously what the hell is going on w those#i went on a 24 hour sidequest to figure out how to draw his hair and now i have a crush on him. love and light#i have redraws of other peoples art that look really good but obviously im not gonna post those yk#alfyn hair drawing sidequest also coincided w my 5.5 hour shift today so you KNOW i was rotating him in my mind#i was 3ish hours in and suffering bc i didnt bring lunch#straight up i was like i know im tired. but what would alfyn say if i didnt smile at these kids in the pool#so i did#this isnt even about the fucking art anymore bro
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aaaaaa
#this is becoming a realy bad issue ruining my life but i cant talk to anyone about it :(#even just it in the wild drives me crazy its so bad ...idk where to go about it#uggh...it really sucks. it sucks so bad. like i literally cannot do anything about it. even if i were to have someone i trust enough to#talk to about it its just so fucking...i cant tell anyone...SO im gonna be vague about it sorry x_x i know ppl get so curious#sorry im venting in the tags because i feel bad making an actual post#not like it changes anything lmao but it makes me feel better#i feel really bad venting on here but its kind of comforting. i wont do it again..or..often#i wish icould fix this. one tiny thing and it sends me into this like...spiral. it sucks. it sucks. its so embarrassing#its making my life a hell i try to avoid it as much as possible luckily its easy to avoid but when i come across it it HITS me#it hits me. like right now. i hate it. and it hits me and it makes me realize how bad it really is and it takes up my mind for hours#like seriously? out of every problem i could have why is it this lol#i wish i knew what was wrong with me.. i dont think its normal..but oh well#sorry for venting im fine ill try to not do it again or at least go in depth like this. its just. ruining my life i have to get it out-#-in some way even if its vague like this. i dont know if this makesm e feel better even#i think im pmsing lol which probably makes it a bit worse so im fine#venting on tumblr is so embarrassing but i just. no one i trust i can talk to about this. this is all i got#sorry for clogging ur dash lol#i wish i was normal -_-#thunder roars
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man i hate twitter. if i didnt need a social media presence for art, i would delete it immediately. g@m3rz are pissing me off
#blaming problems on diversity makes my blood boil#absolute dogshit#sbi is probably garbage but it's not the cause of problems with games#and i hate how the people calling this shit out are getting shat on by randos#there's so many that i can't block all of them#seriously i cant express how angry it makes me. i work in the games industry#it's not that fucking diverse#leadership is probably all white people#the people making the big decisions are all white why the fuck would diversity be the PROBLEM#jfc i would love to work with a more diverse team#it really sucks being surrounded by 99% cis white het men when you're not that#screaming into the void#aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa#dumping all my fury into tags bc i can't do anything else and I'm sure as hell not gonna talk about it on twatter#fuck
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i heard karlachs monologue was rlly good but holy shit i genuinely dont think i'll be the same after that
#olive.txt#bg3 spoilers#spoilers in tags !!#samantha seriously deserves an award that was soul wrenching#i think back in interviews where they talked abt karlachs trauma and how she reverts into a scared child#the whole encounter w gortash was very much that#and he speaks down to her and calls her a brat#imagine saying ''what do you know about the greater good'' TO THE LIVING EMBODIMENT OF GOOD#he doesnt care what he did to her at all but she does care!! he betrayed her and stole her future and there is no closure!#well i felt pretty satisfied i casted a dancing scroll on him and let karlach go to town *youre gonna go far kid plays in the distance*#her pain and anger is so understandable no one deserves this especially not her#the delivery of ''my heart. it was mine. and they took it'' is so incredibly natural and heartbreaking. this scene gave me actual heartburn#shes seemed pretty confident abt dying but i guess in her own words courage isnt fearlessness :(#ugh the part where she just wants you to tell her everything will be alright and that you can save her!!! so cruel larian!#for a character that lost their heart she sure as hell didnt lose her soul </3#''THANKS FOR LISTENING. FOR EXISTING. LOVE YOU.''#yeah was not prepared for what im guessing is the romantic version of her scene back at camp#idk why i thought they wouldnt address it but wow when she asks if youll stay w her when its her time to go. im in shambles#might take back some of my opinions abt her endings. its still cruel she doesnt get a Happy ending but its being handled rlly well so far
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#i have a rant but it doesn't need to be seen so its going in the tags- like i need to get it out but like it doesn't need to be 'loud' yo?#*yk?#also sidenote my emoji keyboard updated so there's probably gonna be a lot of typos#i seriously cant believe my eyes when it comes to some of the hate online#like#i just blocked a good dozen people because they were just so--- mean spirited? i mean i guess its no surprise there's trolls on the internet#but these ppl are not trolls they just genuinely have these hateful opinions. and that's fine. thats why I'm whispering in my tags because#like it really is fine they're not doing anything wrong. but i just cant bwlelievw my eyes#how can people just so profoundly misunderstand others? and then yell about it so loudly like they're the the most righteous voice?#especially on the internet. i think a lot of times we forget that we only see a tiny little window into what a person is really like.#we will never know the whole story of who someone is or what they've been through in a parasocial format. hell even in a real life format.#it just boggles my mind#i cant imagine the amour of strength it must take to be bullied your whole entire life- as a child and teen and now as an adult creator.#thats insane#and then to have people constantly demanding that you step back into the ring#as if they've never made a mistake before - as if they're anger as a stranger on the internet is some sort of divine right#i just wow#complete opposite energy of the boop button#we need more boop buttons#metaphorically and literally- we need to push more buttons that say 'i love you' that say 'i don't know who the fuck you are or what you've#been through jut i see you and i love you'#what if we all just held hands#ugh#i guess you could call this rant 'baby's first time seeing an anti tag'#ughhhhh
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#tag talk#I feel so fucking great today. ironically I'm having trouble getting anything done because I keep just lying down to sigh contentedly#idk. I just feel so genuinely happy.#maybe it has something to do with the smell bout of random depression disappearing at least for now. no longer shitting out my guts either#and also I get to see the cute girl who also likes me back today so that's super pogchamp.#ugh do y'all have any idea how absolutely down bad I am for her??? like. seriously.#I know this won't be a long term thing but damn if I'm not gonna appreciate it for the two years I'm still living in this city.#like. I knew things would get better eventually. I was seventeen and telling myself things would one day be better#sure it's taken eight years but like... fuckin hell I'm self actualizing for real now.#mood stabilizers. adhd meds. hrt. I'm finally able to address the problems I've been battling my whole life.#and moving out from my parents has given me the freedom to figure shit out apart from the situation that's been fucking me up all my life#I just. fucking hell this is so nice.#YOOO I HAVE JIGGLY CALF MUSCLES AGAIN HELL YEAH#I've been a little wasted away for the past year but I've started working out again since since got adhd meds and damn#I don't like being so awfully skinny so it's nice to have curves and slight jiggles on my body again#calf muscles my beloved#I'm learning to love my arm muscles but I've always loved my leg muscles. partially I think cause leg muscles are associated with feminine#whereas arm muscles are culturally seen as masculine. so that kind of got embedded in my brain growing up. but I'm learning to love both#I also just love my body working like it's supposed to. the joy of a well oiled machine doing what it should.#ofc it's not always consistent. but it's nice when it's working as it should#also I bought a wireless charger for my phone since the charging port got even more fucked up and now barely works at all#so honestly that lifted a pretty big stressor off my mind since phone dying is a huge problem and a new phone is expensive#so I'm feeling more carefree with that at least temporarily fixed. won't have to worry about my phone again for prolly at least another year
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What do you think Jo is ugly and it pissed off people?
no my friend nono you got it all wrong. no its the opposite.
#snap chats#WE ONLY SAY RESPECTFUL THINGS IN THIS HOUSE I WOULD NEVER SAY THAT BOUT ANY CHARA#esp not one mo-capped off an actual guy 😭 a very lovely and funny and phenomenal actor of a guy 😭#get out of my tags everyone im explaining myself#IMA JUST LEAVE WITH those who remember my baddie baddies tier list know. they know the answer#😔#stop im telling the story about my friend playing y7 for the first time again since this is related#i JUST told the story X days ago but its relevant to this topic#because its still funny as hell we got to chapter two and during the car ride to me getting us lunch we were like#Seriously talking about the game and she was theorizing what would happen next and just talking about how she loved ichiban#after all that like. we just sat in silence for like a minute or two#i cant remember if she brought him up first but im 99% sure i was like 'so whatd you think of jo' or something#and she was just Snap. 👀#and then we spent the rest of the ride talking about him fjLKJELKAJ FUNNIEST THING EVER#no cause when i was doing my first playthrough of y7 and /i/ saw jo the first time i Also was just 👁️👁️#idk what it was bro was just doin accountant shit aAEJLKA😭☠️☠️☠️#and still i was like 😔hii 🥰😔 the rarest instance of me. in a sense. falling for a chara frame one ☠️☠️ very embarrassing ☠️#and then the rest of the game unfolded and now we're here SO NO anon i DIDNT find him unattractive#it was terminal literal frame one and the sniper outside is to make sure i dont say anything INSANE and lose the respect of everyone#whatever respect exists. there's like. a drop of it left and i will cling onto it for my life
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I reblogged this so hard I broke my reblog button
#writing#art#writblr#artblr#music#musicblr#all other art stuff I didn't mention in tags#ah#also#ai#is useless algorithm interface#it's just stupid#writeblr#Love you all artists#because seriously#world without art is pointless#even the cavemen had art#hell even animals create art#or admire the world#how much of stuck in your ass do you have to be to not admire the world in any capacity#(Well i know how
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#hmmmm#vent cw#dont read this#no seriously i warned you im being a whiney piece of shit#I should probably be worried about the 3-day long panic attack ive had going on#the physical symptoms really are rhe works- the swimming vision the dizziness the tight chest feeling that is uniquely 'anxiety'#and then you add the inability to think for more than like 5 minutes about any given topic#the stress to the point of wanting to cry when things go slightly wrong#but ironically i cant seem to summon any actual anxiety about the anxiety#juat a blank numbness there#really do need it to stop tho as i think its destroying what little appeal as a human i had left at this point#and its seriously hampering my ability to get work done#which i absolutely need to be doing bc if i dont finish my work i cant take on more work#and if i dont take on more work i will officially no longer be paying my bills next month#'sky this seems like talk for a therapist not hidden tags on the tumblr dash' yeah I dont think sitting on this for a month will work#'talk to a friend about it then' hahaha no at least here anyone who reads this fuckin chose to#putting up with me normally is a big ask putting up with me when im needy & anxious & breaking down bc its Too Fucking Much?#lmfao hell no i like my friendship INTACT thanks#a bitch is not about to be a drain on emotional resources when said bitch cannot contribute fuckall of value thats how you make it all worse#and then a month later the therapist cancels so i just keep adding tags to this post bc no one will read them#but i feel like im “talking to someone”#the panic attacks stopped but i have no idea why#i mean im still feeling unusually heightened anxiety 24/7 but its not causing physical symptoms#not like it was anyway#and at least now being anxious makes sense#its a bunch of small to medium shit id probably feel better about if i talked more#but the less i talk and just observe people from a distance unseen the happier people i care about seem so#im literally a fifth wheel so the least i can do is not squeak and alert others to my presence#i really need to get better at art and get faster at working so i can have SOMETHING to offer#oh wow theres a tag limit apparently guess i have to find a new method bc making a new post is begging for attention & I don't wanna do that
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Oasis ࿐ྂ Kinktober. 01, oct.
— pairing: Spencer Reid x wife!reader
— type: smut, Kinktober (Criminal Minds Edition)
— kink: squirting + overstimulation
— summary: Spencer finds out another guy made you squirt in the past and it hits a nerve. You agree to try this with him, even after your husband's sudden childish behavior.
— word count: 4.3k
— tags/warnings: kinktober 1st day, female!reader, husband!Reid, squirting, overstimulation, arguing, mention of safeword (no use), fingering, oral sex (female receiving), curse words, light degradation, biting, body worship, no use of y/n. english is not my first language.
— tagging list: @thatredlipped-classic @magnoliatrees-world @ehedrick012110 @hotchsmutrecs @slutcakes00
— crossposting: AO3
Ever since Spencer had to stay away from Virginia for more than fifteen days solving an extremely urgent criminal case, you've been needy all the time. Your thoughts were in an ironical division between your concern for your husband's safety and well-being, but also the pure desperation and desire to be touched by him again as soon as he returned home.
And it didn't happen.
Unfortunately, Spencer arrived so tired the night before that he didn't even bother to reheat his dinner. After all, it wasn't your fault if he returned late and the lasagna was already cold. Spencer was never a husband who demanded you anything. Both of you cooked and took turns doing the other tasks... As any couple should do. Of course he never complained if you didn't make his lunch before work. It was the least a husband should do. And you two knew it.
So it was a big surprise when there were no welcome hugs and kisses, but just the rolling of his eyes when he noticed that you put his dish in the fridge due the lateness. A spoiled attitude coming from him, and you gave up the lecture because you supposed he was just exhausted and frustrated after the case he solved with the team.
However, that didn't last long. Spencer simply took his things to sleep in the guest room. That made you angry as hell. He couldn't be being such a petty brat over a damn cold dinner, right? Spencer wasn't like that.
It was only a few minutes before you followed Spencer into the other room, asking for an at least reasonable explanation for what was happening to him.
And your hope of ending the night of Spencer's return with a good sex was completely dashed due to the unexpected argument.
During the morning, you left the room still sleepy and grumpy by Spencer's behavior last night, but tried to focus on other things. You tried to distract yourself by making the breakfast, furrowed brow as you watched the eggs and bacon strips frying in the pan.
You turned the piece of meat to the other side when you realized that it was already a little fried, but you let out a sigh when you felt hands entwining around your waist, the recognition of the shaving lotion smell preventing you from screaming in fright.
"It smells great..." Spencer hummed with groggy voice from sleep, leaning over so he could be at your height and resting his chin on your shoulder. The compliment about the good scent he was also flowing almost escaped your lips, but you remained silent, ignoring his existence right there behind you. Even though you hated giving him the silent treatment, your pride was wounded and you needed to give him a taste of his own medicine. After all, he had been trying to ignore you all night, before the uncomfortable silence turned into a stupid fight.
Not getting any reaction made Spencer's heart to ache, and he sighed. "Honey, please... Talk to me. You know how much it hurts me not to talk to you."
You couldn't help but let out a mockery sound, without even looking at him back. "Seriously, Reid? Because I remember very well that you were planning to do exactly that shit last night."
Your accusation made Spencer let out a frustrated sigh, his hands letting go of your waist and taking a few steps away. For a moment, you thought he was angry too and going back to guest room or maybe the living room, but instead, you looked at him furiously as he turned off the flame of the stove.
"What the hell? I haven't finished cooking yet!" You exclaimed with a frown, not believing your husband's boldness.
"Yeah... I know." Spencer took a deep breath, looking at you with those puppy dog eyes. "You can finish later. I need to explain myself."
"Oh, so now you wanna explain yourself?" You scoffed. "Maybe if you had done that yesterday instead of treating me like trash or-"
Spencer cut you off, holding your shoulders gently but firmly enough to make you shut up and pay attention to what he needed to say.
"I'm so sorry, okay?" He began and one of your eyebrows rose in a nonverbal sarcasm sign. "I'm serious, honey. I was an asshole last night and-"
"Yes. You were." Your words came out colder than he was expecting and he swallowed the lump that formed in his throat. "You threw a lot of shit at me without me even knowing why we were fighting."
Spencer took another deep breath, trying to work up the courage to confess about what messed with his mind. He knew that nothing he said would justify his actions and that was making him anxious, his heart ached not only at the mere thought of you not forgiving his childish behavior, but also at the possibility of you keeping to avoid his touches and his attempts to talk.
Spencer let go of your shoulders, his hands coming down until they were intertwined with yours, even if your fingers were stiff at first.
"I was jealous..." The confession finally came in an embarrassed whisper.
A perplexity look appeared on your face. "Jealous? Of what?" You asked, trying to look him in the eyes, even though his face was tilted down, a few strands of hair hiding his flushed cheeks. When he didn't answer, you insisted, lightly touching his fingers that were still intertwined with yours. "Explain it to me, Spencie."
Your demand said by a less angry way made him whimper, needing to be honest. "Y-Yesterday, after the case, the team was at the BAU. JJ, Prentiss and Garcia were talking some personal stuff about their sex lives..." Spencer began. "I-I wasn't paying attention, logically, I swear. I was with Morgan and Hotch talking about random things, but my hearing accidentally picked up a certain topic of the talk between the girls and-"
"Spencie..." Your voice softer now that you noticed how he seemed embarrassed and stuttering like a little child, as well as he was also beating around the bush. "I know you're nervous, but you could try going straight to the point, please? I'm worried here too."
Spencer nodded, knowing you were right. "I accidentally heard JJ whispering to the girls that you already had a squirt." He murmured and it was your turn to get hot and rosy cheeks. You could imagine that JJ hadn't told your secret as a gossip, but rather to add some important information on the subject, but it still left you embarrassed. "But you never had a squirt with me..."
Your eyes widened with realization and you tried to work around the situation. "Baby..."
"Don't do that... Please. I know how it works, okay? I know that not every woman can squirt and I also know that those of you who can squirt don't necessarily do this often. I've also read that it's not always as pleasing for you as porn makes it seem-"
You cut him off. "So you also know that squirting doesn't always happen during a orgasm. It can also happen even without cumming. It's something individual for each woman, it's not like an exact rule."
Spencer huffed angrily. "I know, fuck. I know..." He grumbled, running a hand over his face. "I know how all this shit works. But it doesn't change anything."
"What doesn't change, Reid?" You exclaimed impatiently now.
"The fact that you hid this from me!" Spencer shouted and you immediately rolled your eyes. "Damn, don't you dare roll your eyes at me. You don't know how much hearing that behind my back hurt me."
"Retroactive jealousy? Really, Spencer? You know better than anyone this doesn't make any sense." You huffed, massaging your temples to avoid the huge urge to pick up that frying pan and hit your husband in the back of the head.
His jaw clenched when you mentioned that. "It's not... It's not just jealousy, much less the retroactive one." He was stubborn like a fucking child, the sight of Spencer crossing his arms to try to look more mature almost made you chuckle.
"Oh, I bet it is, and very immature too." The scoff escaped before you could think of something more gentle to say. "Fuck, Spencer. It's not like we share details about our past sex lives with each other. That would be really awkward and uncomfortable. I don't wanna know what you've done with other women in your past and I guess you don't wanna know what I've done in my past either."
Spencer kept his arms crossed, but his eyebrows shot up and his jaw clenched for the second time, a clear sign that he knew you were right, it was just hard to admit.
"Well, I really don't wanna hear about that old stuff, but this is important one..."
"Why on earth would this be important?"
"BECAUSE NOW I'M FEELING INSUFFICIENT!" Spencer uncrossing his arms as he looked at you with despair. "I feel like I'm not giving you enough pleasure! Now I feel like I've never given you a decent orgasm."
You felt your eyes widen again. It all still didn't make any sense, it was something completely irrational coming from Spencer. You knew that academically, Spencer was always a genius who knew about anything in the world, but when it was something regarding you or your relationship, he acted like any man, lost with most situations and also insecure at times.
"You're being ridiculous." You grumbled, trying to push past him before his hand closed around your wrist, keeping you firmly in place.
"I know. I know I'm being immature and irrational, but-"
"But what, Spencer? Jesus Christ, if you were trying to deal with jealousy, it would have been easier to have asked to fuck me last night or something."
His face flushed and he began to stutter, not knowing what to do other than let go of your arm.
After two minutes of awkward silence, Spencer tried to argue again. "That's not... That doesn't make sense. We can't solve our relationship problems by having sex..."
His hypocrisy made you roll your eyes. "Oh, sure. And fighting solved it?" You asked and he looked away, knowing you were right. Again. "Yesterday I was really desperate to have sex with you."
He lifted his head and looked at you, surprised. "You mean that?"
You laughed quietly due to the confusion in his face. "Yes, Spencie. You've been away from home for over a fortnight, do you really think I'm not fucking horny?"
Spencer stopped to think for a moment, scratching the back of his head and trying hard to find a solution to the stupid situation he created. "So can we... Can we try?"
You looked at him, thinking about denying it out of a tantrum, but you just sighed and then argued. "I don't know, Spencer... I'm not in the mood, but we can try just for learning purposes. More like a lesson than our real sex."
A guilt expression appeared on Spencer's face, along with a pang in his chest. The idea of you not even wanting to have real sex with him for now was torturous for him. He knew he had failed with you, being so immature to the point of making you lose your lust about the situation. But he could try to redeem himself. Even though it was a selfish thought at first, he was now determined to apologize properly.
"Yes... Yes, that sounds good..." He gave you a sad smile.
You lay down on the bed and put a pillow under your hip. Your pajamas were already thrown somewhere random on the floor, just like the pink cotton panties. You were ready to teach Spencer whatever he needed to learn.
There was no certainty that he would be able to make you squirt. You always had the best orgasms when Spencer was in charge of pleasuring you, but he was feeling less after the discovery that you had already squirted with the help of another man. A man who wasn't him.
Maybe hiding this fact from him hadn't been tbe wisest choice, even if you hadn't done it on purpose. You just didn't think that mentioning this situation or asking Spencer to try that would really be so important. Over the years, no man had given you half the pleasure that Spencer gave you on a daily basis, squirting or not.
"Well, let's do it." Your words came out emotionless as you parted your legs, giving him the perfect view of your still barely wet pussy.
"You're shaved..." Spencer frowned at your complete lack of pubic hair so suddenly. Or at least that's what he thought.
You rolled your eyes, impatience side by side with embarrassment, both eating you alive. "Like I said, I was desperate to fuck with you as soon as you got back from the case. So I decided to get a full wax beforehand."
At other times, Spencer would laugh hearing you confess so openly about your high desire for his body over the past few weeks. At other times, he would even tease you about needing a vibrator to help you achieve your release when he was away, even if you were more than capable of cumming with your own fingers.
But your hands didn't provide you the same ecstasy that Spencer's long thin fingers made you feel. And he knew it too.
You felt yourself holding your breath the moment Spencer took off his shirt to make himself more comfortable. As much as your pride told you to look away from his body, it was impossible for you to stop enjoying the view. Watching Spencer's bare skin was as addictive as the fresh water of an Oasis should be for thirsty people walking through deserts. And you couldn't lie... You were desperate to quench your thirst and taste him again after all that time away from each other.
Spencer knelt on the floor, carefully pulling your legs so that your lower body was closer to the edge of the bed, and automatically closer to his face.
"Are you okay, honey?" He asked with a cocky smile as he felt your thighs tingle as he touched them to adjust your position.
Hearing your husband's sarcastic smugness, you held back from punching him in the shoulder. "Yeah, I'm great." Your voice sounded angry and he chuckled softly, nodding his head and turning his attention to your center, which was finally starting to get wetter.
"I'm seeing..."
You ignored his mockery and looked at the ceiling, not wanting to exchange eye contact at that moment. Spencer's puppy eyes plus his mischievous smile were an almost fallen angel combination. Like a wolf in sheep's clothing or the Devil in disguise, just as Elvis Presley said in that song.
Spencer giggled as he ran his fingertips down your thighs, caressing your skin so gently that it felt like delightful torment. You fought to maintain an expression of indifference and boredom, but the goosebumps that passed through your body told him a different story.
Already knowing that not so soon you would give in and admit your lust, Spencer began to left kisses spread across the lower part of your thighs, enjoying the sound of your breathing becoming increasingly panting.
"What's the next step, professor? Your teaching method it's being too silent..." Spencer joked and you couldn't help but roll your eyes.
"Just... Just keep doing what you always do for now." You hummed with the last bit of patience you had left, grabbing the sheet to keep your hands out of Spencer's hair.
Another chuckle escaped Spencer's lips and he nodded, placing more soft kisses on your skin before moving closer to your pussy again, closing his eyes and inhaling the scent of your essence for a few seconds before leaving a quick delicate kiss on your bud. “F-fuck…” You squirmed slightly, your eyes widening at his unexpected action. "T-this is new..."
"I saw something like this while I was watching porn after our argument and I thought this might be good for you." Spencer confessed and you nodded with difficulty, a confirmation that the wished effect was occurring.
You looked at Spencer's cute face, but the eye contact lasted very little time, because as soon as Spencer's tongue began to tease your clit, your head arched back, more moans escaping as he held your legs firmly, not letting you give in to the normal human reaction of trying to deflect sudden pleasure. "Fuck... Why is this even better than usual?"
Spencer laughed again at the question you asked amidst the moaning session. He knew you were more touchy this time and he had an idea why. Probably due to the fact that both of you missed each other's bodies, as well as the fact that he was working hard as if it were actually a goal to be achieved, a prize to be won. But he wouldn't stop licking you to admit it. Deep down, he supposed that you were realizing that too.
"T-two fingers, Spencer! Put two fingers inside!" Your order left him a little disconcerted, since despite everything, he was used to putting in one finger at a time. As soon as he did what you demanded to him, he felt the walls of your pussy almost crushing his fingers, a desperate moan escaping your lips, fleshy and reddened from holding back the sounds that wanted to escape.
"Damn, honey... You're needy today." Spencer smirked, starting the movements more gently, wanting to enjoy the sight of you writhing around his fingers, begging for more. "You said it would just be a lesson, just a method to stop my stupid retroactive jealousy... But you're loving it, don't you?"
You just kept moaning. Even though the pleasure was obvious by the way your cheeks flushed and your hips rolled around Spencer's fingers. Pride prevented you from saying you were excited to make a mess on the sheets.
When Spencer interspersed the fingerfucking and his lips closing slightly around your clit, starting to suck gently, an immediate whimper left your lips. "F-fuck, do it again. Do it one more time, Spencie."
Spencer, the genius who learned too quickly, followed your commands like a good boy, sucking the swollen bud again, his fingers moving faster when he noticed how you eyes were rolling back in pleasure. It was a divine view. He could fuck you for hours, just as he could watch you cum for hours too.
He greedily licked away your first orgasm of the day, even though he knew it still wasn't enough. It still wasn't the goal you two were looking to achieve that morning. However, not only did Spencer never waste the opportunity to take in every drop of your sweet release, but he also knew that the first orgasm could make it easier to get closer to your potential squirt.
And to be honest, he might even be content with your normal orgasms, since you looked so beautiful when you came on his lips.
Your lungs burned for air as his breathing normalized, his heartbeat became faster and your vision readjusting to reality. When the white flashes disappeared, you look back at Spencer, who still has a cocky smile on his face, his fingers still working inside you.
"Honey, you're a very unfocused teacher." He mocked and the literal joke made you laugh, a weak, breathless sound, mixed with some sighs of pleasure that were impossible to you contain.
"Or maybe my dearest student's very diligent. Too much, actually." Your mockery made him laugh too. His lips moving closer to your intimacy again, but now focusing on nibbling the flesh of your thigh, speeding up his fingerfucking again. Even the smallest touch making you whimper, your pussy tightening from the overstimulation.
Spencer noticed this and bit your skin for the second time, now with a little more pressure, and you were sure you heard the neighbor from the next apartment knock on the wall to curse you for the sudden fucking loud moan in the middle of the morning. This only further increased Spencer's growing arousal and your need for more release. "Grumpy old woman." You mumbled about her, trying hard to hide the embarrassment that colored your cheeks.
"Oh, c'mon... Don't be shy, my dear wife." Spencer chuckled, licking your soft flesh before teasing your with his teeth again, but now just scraping them across your skin until he reached your core. You felt the moment when the central and lateral incisors brush against your clit. It was a soft act despite it taking a gasp from you due to the little pain. And then he did it again, returning to moving his fingers roughly.
When Spencer nibbled on your swollen clit, you almost screamed, but his free hand stopped you from moving away from him. “Relax, baby…” He purred, licking your sensitive pussy to redress for the pain he caused, his wet warm tongue matching perfectly with the bitter sting of his teeth returning to bit the same spot. It was so painful and hot...
“S-Spencie…” You whimpered as he blew on your slightly tortured clit. A rush of air so brief that you would barely feel it usually, but now, with your pussy burning in flames, the mere breeze of his sigh in that right spot made you shiver and squeeze his fingers tighter.
"It's okay, I'm feeling it, baby... I'm feeling your little pussy squeezing me. Are you gonna cum again? Will you be a good wife and wet my tongue with your cum?" Spencer practically growled, focusing back on fingering you, his fingers moving in and out of you at such a fast pace that the wet obscene noise joined your moans, filling the room like music to Spencer's ears.
The moment his tongue returned to licking your soaked folds, your body shook more than expected and you opened your mouth in a silent scream, your back writhing in Spencer's grip, arched and aching as the clear jets wetted your husband's face, a guttural groan escaping him as he opened his eyes to see you with your eyes closed and your legs shaking as he committed himself to drinking every drop from the fountain you provided.
Spencer didn't give you time to adjust to that non-routine orgasm. He took care of remaining with his head in the same position, between your thighs, licking your pussy as if it were the tastiest Oasis' water. Savoring the flavor, eyes closed as he concentrated on getting messy, not caring which part of his face he was rubbing against your warm cunt. Whether it was the lips, the nose, the chin... He rubbed every inch of his face, noticing how your moans became desperate again and you tried to push his head away, a mix of overstimulation and shyness.
Spencer always loved eating you out. However, nothing was like now. Nothing was like feeling eaten alive by a hungry lover, and at the same time so worshiped by him.
"J-Jesus... it's enough, Spencie. S-stop, please." You tried to push him away, enough to get a heavenly view of his face glistening due your juices, completely messed up and handsome like a angel.
But he looked up grinning like a devil. "Unless you want or need to say your safeword, then it's not enough and I'm not stopping now." He threatened, even though you two knew that the one word would stop him immediately.
Instead of answering him, you grabbed the back of Spencer's head closer to your already swollen pussy. He removed his fingers, focusing on letting you rub against his face. Every inch of the tip of his nose brushing against your folds was enough to make more pathetic whimpers come from you, plus a little liquid leaking out, now in light jets and low quantities.
You trembled, letting go of the back of his head and looking at him with your lip bleeding from biting so much. You wanted to say something, anything to say thank you, but Spencer had other plans. His fingers, still soaked from fucking your walls, began to return working on your clit. He smirked at your screams of pleasure, the tears streaming down your face... And he enjoyed every minute of all of this, exchanging his long fingers for his own palm, where the friction turned aggressiver, more painful, eliciting louder screams from you as he practically left your pussy raw, biting your thighs to create a mix of impressive actions whose only possible consequence was having you squirting into the palm of his hand, screaming like a whore. His little whore. Only his.
And when you did it, Spencer finally moved his arms away from your body. You sobbed, eyes closed and tears flowing. But he knew you were fine, especially when you let out a soft, weak and shy chuckle at just hearing the sound of him licking his own fingers so as not to waste any drop of your squirt.
"Was I better than your ex?" Spencer teased, pulling you to his chest, where he could caressing your hair and calm your tremors from all the orgasms he gave you.
Still with your eyes closed to try and calm down, you let out a scoff through your nose. He already understands how you feel, but that doesn't stop him from wanting you to say it, loud and clear. You nodded at his provocation and received a soft kiss on your forehead, while his hands snaked around your waist, getting closer to your tired and fragile body. "You're a very smart and diligent student." You managed to scoff and Spencer laughed, kissing your cheeks.
"Only because you're my favorite professor, honey."
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Text
never took me quite where you do
tags: established relationship, fluff, silliness
a/n: based on king of my heart. (which was also my eras surprise song!!)
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"you haven't had a girlfriend?" you ask, surprise coloring your voice.
rin itoshi stares at you like you've suddenly got infinitely stupider. "not before you."
"that's," you start, then stop. actually, now that you're really thinking about it, it does make sense. "you know what, yeah. seems about right."
offense glares in his eyes as he leans away from you. "the hell does that mean?"
you raise your brows. "what do you think, rin?"
he fully untangles his limbs from yours at that, shoving himself off of the couch. you protest at his motion - a little halfheartedly, but the effort is there .
standing up to his full height, rin itoshi glares down at you.
you blink up at him, smiling with all the innocence you can muster. "yes?"
"do you know how much fan mail i get?" he grits out. "how many chocolates i've gotten on valentine's?"
it takes quite a lot of effort for you to not start laughing. "i do know how popular you are, yes. you should see the edits on tiktok."
"so why-" rin falters. "edits?"
"go on."
it takes him a second. "i could've had a girlfriend if i wanted to," he says at last. "i just didn't."
you nod, still biting back a smile. "mhm. i'm sure all the girls would've loved you after seeing that personality of yours." you scoot over, offering up the space on the couch again.
rin continues to stare, but you can see his will weakening. "not like anyone wanted to date your lukewarm ass either," he says with a finality.
you snort. "i thought you grew out of that word."
he rolls his eyes.
"also- factually untrue. i've had boyfriends before."
and rin's entire demeanor switches. "what?"
you wave your hand, dismissive. "not like a lot, but. an average amount to have for a high schooler, i think. none of it was ever serious. not like you," you grin.
rin doesn't return it. genuine shock bleeds through his face; he turns on his heel. "i'm going to bed."
"wha- rin?"
forty five minutes later, you breeze into your shared bedroom. your teeth are freshly brushed, your skin lotioned, and you're almost ready for a good night's sleep.
"are you actually still mad about- what the hell are you doing?"
rin freezes, one hand still on the computer mouse. from your vantage point, you can see every pixel on that screen.
"is that my high school boyfriend?"
he turns in the swivel chair, very clearly not in bed. the classic 'itoshi indifference,' as you've coined it, masks itself over his face.
you step closer. "rin. is that, or is that not, the instagram profile of my ex."
he nods, slowly.
"can i ask why you're looking at his profile?"
he begins to shake his head, and then changes his mind (a good choice). but rin itoshi has never been too good at keeping himself calm-
"he's unemployed."
there's a beat of silence.
"sorry?"
"jobless. a leech on society. useless as a human being," rin continues. "a complete ass of himself, basically."
you stare at him. he stares at you. and then-
you burst out laughing. "are you serious?"
rin seems surprised by your reaction. it makes you laugh even harder.
"oh my god- you've been stalking his socials? for the last, like, hour?' you broke your stupid athlete sleep schedule for this?" there are genuine tears welling in the corner of your eyes. "for a guy i dated years ago?"
a little self-conscious now, rin stands up. "i was trying to sleep for the first twenty minutes. after that.." he trails off.
and you slam into him with a hug, still laughing. "i love you so much."
he stiffens at the initial contact, but gives into your touch the moment after. "i love you too?"
you hum into his ear. "they don't matter anymore. you know that, right? they never did- not seriously enough. you're the only one."
rin doesn't reply.
"and i know you could have any girl you wanted. but that doesn't matter to me. because you want me. and i will never get enough of you, rin itoshi."
his voice is a low murmur. "me neither. no one's ever compared to you."
and he presses a kiss onto your lips, and it's better than anything you've ever had.
#hydrobunny#blue lock fluff#blue lock#blue lock x reader#itoshi rin x reader#rin itoshi x reader#rin x reader#might possibly be ooc but i tried so insanely hard#big day for reputation lovers
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