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wheeboo · 1 year ago

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seventeen and saying “I love you” for the first time

PAIRING. seventeen (ot13) x gn!reader GENRE. fluff, slight angst?, headcanons/scenarios, established/implied hidden relationship, idol au WARNINGS. some kissing, consistent terms of endearment, just absolute softness dude. WORD COUNT. 3.4k

requested by anon: hi hiii i love your writings and i see the reqs is open. so how do you think svt would say 'i love you' for the first time? like, they're people who's being supervised all the time and very busy, so they're pretty hesitant about whether the relationship will work out or not but then he realizes that it means so much to him after some time.

notes: i hope i manage to capture ur request well aaaa i’m not confident. for this i wrote a lil scenario under each member instead of the usual long ass descriptions, but i thinki veered off the request oops and they get more silly as you read more LOL. sorry this took such a long time and if it seems repetitive! i started running out of ideas alksjderj

choi seungcheol

“Y/N, you don’t need to𑁋”

“cheol, I insist,” you bring your hands to his shoulders, directly him to lay down on the bed. “just rest up, please. let me cook for us tonight, okay?”

seungcheol could only watch as you disappear into the kitchen, coming back in with a steaming bowl of soup. the constant practice and performances ultimately made the stress hit him at once. and you being you, took this as the opportunity to take care of him.

you sit down at the edge, carefully lifting a spoonful of soup and before bringing it to him, grinning at the satisfied hum that leaves his lips.

as you continue feeding him, you ramble on about your day, and he could only listen. it’s these moments he’s grown to cherish where the stresses of his other life dissipate and he lets himself be taken care of, but these burdening feelings for you lingers.

you’ve constantly assured him that taking care of him was a way to show that you want this relationship as much as he does, despite all the consequences. it always brings a certain flutter to his heart, almost like a hug he’s always needed. he’s known the feeling for a while now.

he doesn’t realise you’ve finished talking as he sees you stand up, but he’s quick to grab your hand.

“wait, uh,” he starts, and you see the hesitation flicker in his face for a moment. pursing his lips together, he looks back up at you with nothing but adoration. “you know that I love you, right?”

you blink, nearly dropping the bowl from the way your hands grow limp at his words.

“well,” you smile shyly. “now I do.”

yoon jeonghan

“angel? what are you doing?”

“me?” you ask as if it wasn’t blatantly obvious you were the only person in the room. “just folding your laundry.”

jeonghan can’t help the smile to his face as he enters into the bedroom, placing himself down next to you at the edge of the bed. he could lay down if he wanted to; he finds his body exhausted from rehearsal. but he doesn’t want to lay down yet, at least not without you.

“what do you say I drop by your dressing room before your performance?” you ask him with nothing but hopefulness.

he lifts a brow. “are you sure? don’t you have work tomorrow?”

you smile at him, folding up his last shirt. “nope. called in sick so I can attend your stage. thought you’d need me to charge you up with energy, you know?”

jeonghan’s heart does a particular leap. for nearly every performance that you visit him at, he finds himself continuously clinging onto you for good energy and support. he does it out of spite, simply because he loves the feeling of your body, your warmth, your love against him, like a constant reminder that you are there, and you are real.

“I think I’d love that very much.” he sits closer to you, snaking an arm around your waist once you place his folded shirt down, pulling you closer to him.

and he knows he’s done for when he hears those giggles leave your mouth.

so he leans in close, whispering something in your ear he has always wanted to say for the longest time now.

“but not as much as I love you.”

joshua hong

no matter what day it was, joshua always finds himself waking up in the mornings before you do. even after an exhausting day of rehearsal the previous night, he still wakes up before you.

his eyes flutter open as he peers in your direction, a soft smile crossing his face at the sight of your chest heaving up and down rhythmically. he doesn’t want to disturb you, but you’re just so darn cute and beautiful, and the rest of the day is fortunately free for the two of you.

“sweetheart,” he lets a finger poke lightly at your nose, smirking to the way it crinkles from his touch. “wake up, remember it’s my day off today?”

“mmmh,” you grumble, playfully batting away his hand with yours. “ten more minutes.”

joshua knows he can’t get himself to resist you, so he lays back down in bed directly across from you. he doesn’t fall back asleep, instead only lets his eyes wander admiringly over your features, and he thinks he can wake up like this next to you for the rest of his life, even with his busy career.

he knows the consequences when it comes to love, but he’s willing to love you to himself all he can.

leaning in, he presses a tender kiss to the top of your forehead.

“I love you.” he mutters quietly, and he catches sight of the subtle lift at the corner of your lips.

wen junhui

you find jun napping soundly on the couch. or so you think he is, because the moment you approach up to him, you find a pair of arms lodging around your waist and pulling you into the couch, a surprised yelp leaving your mouth.

“jun! oh my god𑁋what are you𑁋”

“you’re finally home, my little blanket~”

“you are ridiculous,” you murmur annoyingly, but end up naturally relaxing in his arms anyway like you always do. pressing up against him, you let your head fall to the crook of his neck, where it seems to fit perfectly. “long day today?”

you feel the rise and fall of his chest, a deep sigh leaving his lips.

“just tired,” he responds. “but better now that you’re here.”

you smile against his skin. “you know you count on me for anything, right?”

there’s some silence, a silence thick with unspoken thoughts, but it’s mainly jun who can feel it. he knows he can, knows he can tell you anything that comes to his mind and that you’ll listen. it’s just... a bit terrifying being this intimate, this in love with you knowing it can jeopardise his career. but he’s already in deep. he knows he is.

“can I tell you something?” he asks, voice laced with nervousness.

he feels you nod in his embrace.

taking in a deep breath, he pulls back to be able to see you.

“I... I love you,” he confesses, feeling the heaviness lift off his heart. “been wanting to say that for a while.”

and if it was possible for your heart to smile as well, nothing stops you from kissing him.

kwon soonyoung

“would we still be together if I was on a five-year long tour?”

“mhm.”

“what if I had to move countries?”

“of course.”

“even if I turn into a tiger?”

“surprisingly, yes.”

a pause.

“...would we still be together if I wasn’t an idol?”

“a million times yes, soonie.” you grab his soft face in your hands, giving a gentle squeeze to his cheeks. “I can assure you we would still be together no matter what.”

that was all the reassurance he needed. soonyoung can’t help the excitement bubbling in his chest as he’s quick to lean in and pepper your face with kisses, causing chuckles to elicit out your lips as you fall down on the couch behind with your boyfriend hovering above you, staring down at you with loving eyes and a goofy, lovesick smile.

“gosh, I love you so much, Y/N,” he mumbles against your lips. “and I’m gonna tell you that for the rest of the night.”

jeon wonwoo

“no, no, what if someone saw us? I should have been more careful, I’m so sorry𑁋”

“Y/N,” wonwoo’s voice is firm and demanding, and you make yourself shut up. “it’s okay.”

“but𑁋”

“darling,” he grabs your hand into his, letting the other drift up to cup your cheek softly. “we’ll be okay, I can promise you.”

“I𑁋but what if this ruins your career?” you ask him, feeling the way his fingers are caressing over your knuckles. it calms you down just a bit. “what if me accidentally holding your hand just...”

wonwoo sighs and leads you over to the couch where you both settle yourselves down next to each other. he knows the probable consequences of getting caught, but he cares more about you than what some stupid news dispatch claims. they can say anything, and he’d still be willing to protect you more than himself.

“don’t be scared, okay? even if we were caught...” he hesitates, lips forming a thin line as you wait for him to continue. “it still doesn’t change the fact that I want to be with you, because I love you, and I want this. I want you.”

you feel your lips quiver, some streams of tears running down your face. you can’t get the words out, so you bring him in your embrace for a warm hug, hoping to convey how much you love him as well.

lee jihoon

“babe, this sounds great.”

jihoon just smiles proudly, posture leaned back in his chair as he watches your head bob up and down to the melodies and the sound of his beautiful vocals traveling throughout his studio. you have a hand at the tip of his knee, giving him gentle squeezes each time you got more into the music.

if only you knew that you were a source of inspiration for too many of his songs. too many that he could count.

“thank you,” he says sheepishly. “I managed to whip it up in two hours and was thinking about bringing up with the others.”

“if I love it, I’m sure they will too,” you reach over to grab his hand ressuringly. “and I’m not being biased, I’m serious.”

there’s a particular shift in his grin that you notice. it feels more... fond, moreso admiration even though you should be the one admiring him for this. though jihoon has his challenges in voicing his emotions, sometimes you can just tell from his face.

“okay, I should head home,” you stand up, giving him a kiss on the cheek. “call me later, alright?”

“text me when you get home safe,” he tells you, helping with grabbing your belongings before walking you to the door. once you’re in the door frame, he lowly mutters out under his breath, “...I love you.”

you catch it, but just barely, yet you unconsciously respond with, “I love you too,” before turning back to him with a look of shock and wide eyes. “wait, what?”

xu minghao

a yawn leaves minghao’s mouth as he inputs the code to his apartment. but when he steps inside, he’s immediately met with the familiar aroma of food lingering around him coming from the kitchen. when he walks himself into the kitchen, his eyes grow wide.

“Y/N?” his voice makes you freeze as if you were caught committing a crime, letting his gaze fall to the dining table. “what’s all this?”

“shoot, I didn’t expect for you to come home early,” you scratch at your head, placing down the dish in your hands before walking up to him. “I... uh, tried cooking some of your favourite foods. it was supposed to be a surprise.”

minghao just smiles and approaches up to the dining table with you cowering behind him nervously. his eyes scan over the array of dishes meticulously prepared with love and care, feeling like a fresh wave of home hitting him.

“you know you didn’t have to grow through all this trouble for me.” he turns back to you.

“I know, but I do,” you tell him with a heartfelt smile. “it’s just... a way to show how much I care when you’re gone, since you always come home tired.”

his face only softens. stepping up to you, he places both of his hands firmly at your waist, and he feels you tense up for a split moment before finally relaxing. brushing back some stray hairs from your face, a grateful sigh leaves his lips.

“I love you,” he tells you, suddenly feeling a weight lift off his shoulders. “thank you for everything you do for me.”

kim mingyu

“gyu, get off me.”

“no can do.”

“but you have to go to work.”

“you are more important than work.”

you haven’t had your morning coffee, and your puppy of a boyfriend won’t get off of you, finding most of his body sprawled on top of yours so you’re basically flattened to the bed. at least he had the decency to give you some room to breathe and move, but just barely.

he’s clingy, but not this early in the morning𑁋well it’s usually after you’ve had your morning coffee, but it’s clear you haven’t yet and he’s been glued to you since the moment you woke up. you feel his lips meet the skin of your face, planting soft kisses on your cheeks and forehead to try and coax a smile out of you.

“you’re... suffocating me, gyu.” you squirm just a bit, before his arms circle around you, and you find himself laying right next you on the bed.

“sorry,” he nestles himself up against you. “just don’t want to leave you.”

you run a hand through his messy hair, peering down wonderingly at the way he’s cuddling himself against you. “is everything okay? you’re not usually this clingy. well, you are it’s just𑁋”

“if I say it, will I get a kiss?” he sits up in bed, gazing at you with those desperate eyes that you just have to cave in.

you sigh. “yes, you big boy, I’ll give you any kiss you want.”

mingyu bites at his bottom lip nervously, knowing he has to get it out or else he can’t take it anymore. it’s all that ever clouds his thoughts whenever he takes a single glance at you. he knows it all: the consequences, the hate comments, but the only thing that could break his heart would be to separate from you.

and so he leans in, his breath grazing against the skin behind your ear.

“it’s a secret, so don’t tell anyone,” he whispers. “but I love you.”

lee seokmin

“seokie?”

immediately, seokmin takes his attention of his phone to turn towards you, a mixture of worry to his face. he sets his phone on the bedside table to give you his undivided attention.

“what’s wrong, sunshine?” he asks you, already opening his arms for you to settle in.

you give in, allowing the protection of his arms encircle around you.

“nothing, it’s just...” you glance up at him. “do you think you can sing me to sleep?”

for some reason the simple request was enough to send seokmin’s heart into overdrive. nothing but a wide smile crosses his face as he nods, allowing you to settle back down on the pillow as he props himself up on his elbow next to you.

he starts to hum a slow lullaby, containing a familiar melody of a seventeen song that you recognise. his voice carries an undertone of affection, his words unspoken yet deeply felt. he watches the way your eyes flutter to a close as he begins to reach the end of his lullaby. if it was possible and if you’d let him, seokmin knew he could do this for the rest of his life. he wants to use his voice to not only bring joy to his fans, but to convey the love in his heart.

at the very last line of the song, he leans in close to be able to whisper in your ear.

“I love you so much, sunshine. dream about me, okay?”

boo seungkwan

“Y/N, what are you doing here?” there’s a mixture of surprise and a hint of panic in seungkwan’s voice as he notices you standing at the entrance of the rehearsal room. luckily it was only him and his members in the room.

“I was in the area, so... I brought you some food,” you hold up a bag from behind your back. “wish I could have brought more for the other guys, but... yeah.”

his eyes widen from your thoughtfulness as you reach an arm out to transfer the bag from your hands to his, and he swears he can feel his heart swell beyond his own chest.

you peer behind him to the other guys laughing and minding their own business, while seungkwan in front of you seems completely frozen in time. there’s a blush to his cheeks that you notice and reach out to pinch, making him come back to reality.

you give him a smile. “I’ll see you tonight, okay?”

but as you are about to turn around, he exclaims, “wait!”

and when you look back at him, he feels his tongue go dry. he’s been rehearsing this line for the past few weeks𑁋in front of the mirror and everything𑁋but your gaze on him always makes those words land right at the tip of his tongue, unable to come out.

“uh...” then he steps up closer, glancing back towards the guys before back at you. even though it may not be the right time and the right place to say this, he does anyway, “I love you, thank you for the food.”

you can’t help the chuckle to your lips as his face turns even redder, and the kiss that you place to his warm cheek doesn’t help at all.

vernon chwe

“hey, babe.”

“hey.”

it’s the only exchange you and vernon share before he drops himself on the bed, letting his head rest in your lap, a contented sigh leaving him. naturally, you run your fingers through his hair. you can tell that he’s tired from today.

you and vernon have always had the ability to see how the other feels without words. he can see a quiver to your lips and tell you are frustrated, or you can collapse in his arms and he’ll let you hold him while he’s doing something else to recharge.

but he’s been too quiet lately, you’ve noticed, only exchanging the simple hello’s, goodbye’s, and kisses to each other’s lips without saying anything more since he had to rush work. it’s been troubling you, but him laying in your lap has relieved you... sort of.

“everything okay?” you ask him. “you’ve been... awfully quiet today.”

“yeah, just... work, you know?” he answers, but you can sense the hesitation in his words.

you think for a moment, before asking, “want to talk about it?”

vernon pauses, and you feel like you can physically see him thinking. he sits up from your lap, criss-crossing his legs together before turning around and facing you.

“um, you don’t have to respond, but uh...” he rubs the back of his neck meekly. “...would you freak out if I told you that I love you?”

you stare at him blankly, or lovingly, you don’t know, but you feel your heart doing jumps inside your chest and it’s starting to hurt.

“I’m freaking out from how long I’ve waited for you to say that.”

lee chan

“I love you, Y/N,” chan announces... to the mirror at himself. “or should it be like, ‘I’m in love with you’ or ‘I want to spend the rest of time’𑁋agh, that sounds so cheesy.”

he brings his hands up to his face frustratingly. why is it so hard to simply say how he feels about you TO you? he’s known how he feels for a long time, even with the other members constantly telling him how he has to be careful and all that, or how something like this could make or break his career, but chan know they’re just looking out for him.

he’s been torn between his career and your relationship, knowing both are equally important to him. but the longer he’s been with you, the more this feeling bubbles inside of him.

“I’m in... love with you,” chan tests. “I love you with𑁋”

“chan?”

“𑁋oh gosh!” chan yelps out, turning his body around and noticing you through slightly open doorway of the bathroom.

you furrow your brows, eyes flicking over your boyfriend’s forced smile. “are you okay? I thought I heard muttering.”

“yeah, I was just... rehearsing my speech,” chan pauses for a second. “...just in case we win today?”

you roll your eyes. “cute,” then approach up to him, fixing some of his strands of hair with your finger. “I wish I can make it to your stage to support you, but I know you’ll kill it anyway.”

you tell him something about your work, but chan only keeps his eyes fixated on you. and as you were about to leave, he swiftly grabs your hand.

“Y/N,” chan starts, and you see him noticeably swallow. “you know you mean a lot to me, right?”

you turn back to him, intrigued. “I sure hope I do.”

“okay, and since you mean a lot to me, I know you’ve been my number one support,” he continues, feeling all the words spilling out. “and you’re just... so pretty, so funny, you always make me smile, and I think that... I love you. not think! I do... love you.”

you could only stare at him, wide-eyed, pinpointing the vulnerability in his own eyes, and you feel your heart swell enough to bloom a smile on your face.

planting a kiss to the corner of his lips, you utter out, “I love you too, chan.”

taglist (open) ʚɞ @enhazen @haowrld @ylliris-hanniehae @icyminghao

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shortstrawberry · 11 months ago

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Was having midnight craving of Donna Beneviento so here's some possessive professor Donna.

Professor Donna sees you being too chatty with a fellow classmate in her class. She's not happy.

Today is a really bad day to have a cold.

You let out another loud sneeze in the class, whispering sorry to your poor seatmates. You just had to have a cold when you had a important test to give in your Botany paper. You look down at your answer sheet. The bubbles you had filled seemed almost blurry, your eyes were just that watery. But you're pretty sure you have done enough to at least pass this exam. Not that you need to worry about that, as you can feel your Botany Professor's worried gaze on you.

Dr. Donna Beneviento. Chef extraordinaire, maker of best hot chocolate, giver of best cuddles. Also your Botany professor. And your girlfriend. Although Donna and you prefer the term "partners" much more. The relationship is that serious afterall.

It's in fact so serious on Donna's part that you know if you decide to quit education and decide to just pursue your lifelong dream of being a potato couch, Donna will happily support it. But no, you also have the lifelong dream to open a florist shop, and so here you are: suffering in a botany test.

"Hey, I have a heatpack. You'll feel good if I put it on your forehead."

You do feel so deathly chill right now, the cough clogging up your lungs for a extra measure. So you nodded at your kind seatmate, letting them take care of you.

You thought your seatmate would just place the heatpack on your forehead and be done with it. But no, they started to pet your head as well, coaxing you to fall asleep.

"Hey, you've done enough. Take a nap. I'll keep watch if Professor Beneviento comes around."

Hearing your partner's name, you immediately realised you've done fucked up. Thing is, Donna can be... Uh...a little possessive.

You heard the sound of pencil snapping from the direction of your girlfriend.

Okay, maybe very possessive.

You looked up at your seatmate, hoping that they'd get the hint to maybe keep their hand away. But no, they made the situation worse, by starting to play around with your hair, and then giving a small forehead massage. Instead of it making you feel good, you just felt more worried.

You could hear the boots of your girlfriend approaching you two.

"I think you should focus on the exam."

Yep, that's Professor Donna's seethingly pissed voice. It's quiet like the icy tundras, but you can feel the anger simmering in it.

The hand that was on her head was immediately off, and soon replaced by the gloved one of your girlfriend.

She petted you quietly, then bent down to whisper directly in your ears.

"Do you need me to take you to the infirmary, cara mia?"

My darling. Donna uses that Italian phrase on you when she wants to stake her claim. Otherwise it's usually dolcezza on most days.

You're now on a precarious situation. If you say yes, surely other students would find it strange that their Professor is showing such favouritism towards you. On other hand, if you say no, Donna would probably get more upset. Donna does not like it when she is denied a chance to take care of you.

And you can just sense just how badly Donna wants to bring you in her arms and feed you her hot chocolate.

Still, you care about your girlfriend's professor reputation more then Donna does. So you shook your head no, quietly croaking out your excuse.

"No... Too tired."

You heard Donna exhale in even more concern. But thankfully she didn't force the issue. Instead, she went ahead and took off her black trenchcoat and draped it on top of you. She petted your head one last time, but you can sense that Donna really wanted to kiss you instead.

She did however whisper certain words in your ear.

"We'll get you home soon, cara mia. And then I'll take care of you."

As you dozed off, you decided that you're really looking forward to Donna's possessive caretaking.

Wanna see the possessive caretaking? Lemme know!

#resident lover #donna beneviento #resident evil village #donna beneviento x reader #resident evil x reader #resident evil fanfiction #re8 #resident evil 8 #professor donna #donna simping time

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another-random-paradise · 6 months ago

Note

Hello! I noticed your account has open requests and I've been searching for a while to find some twst writers lol! I really hope you don't mind this request and I like your works :3

A request about Leona and/or Ruggie realizing that this “naive“ m!reader is actually the king of sunset savannah's entertainer/court jester (you know how kings hired court jesters to entertain them in parties or whatever, I haven't done much research). They can insult Falena and the guards wouldn't beat his ass (since it's literally part of his job) PLUS it pays REALLY GOOD. The beastmen just recently found out because of the reader saying a comment about the King, saying something like “His hair reminds me of a tomato.“ “King Tomato Furry (Falena) said that I'll get a raise lol“ just randomly and went back to work.

I HOPE IT MAKES SENSE PLEASE 😭

A lovers Jest

Your brain is so big, anon. So very big, I love this request so much, you don't even know!! In Leonas part the M!reader is mentioned, but in Ruggies it isn't exactly mentioned, since i didn't want to unnecessarily cramp it in, I hope that's okay! Also Leona finds out during a festival, since i thought it would be funny- Also, I'm sorry this took so long, and thank you for the kind words!! Hope you enjoy :) There are way to many "Also's" in this Intro-

---------------------------------------------------------

Finding out their crush is the Royal Jester

Characters: Leona, Ruggie

Format: Headcanons

Warnings: None that i can think off

Leona

-How did he not know earlier about you being his brothers Jester? well, the man was to busy sleeping to partake in any of the royal festivities

-How you could be so seemingly naive was a mystery to him, it really stunned him at times, but nonetheless you seemed to grow on him, so, you two started to hang out often

-He liked how, behind the closed doors of his room, you're even willing to joke and make fun of his brother. Falena is usually held in high regards by citizens of Sunset Savanna, not that he really minded. That is definitely why you two started hanging out so much (definitely not because he is slowly developing a crush on you, nuh uh)

-He would tease, how, as the second prince, he could report you to his brother and the guards, because of your jokes, only to get a laugh in response for from you. Truly, how naive could you be to not take threats seriously? let alone make jokes so carelessly about the king?!

-Well, he was quick to find out, when he eventually was forced to go to a royal event! It's Chekas birthday, and the little man was very insistent about having his beloved uncle there! So, reluctantly, he went, no matter how little he wanted to. He did show up late though

-And when he did arrive, he almost immediately sees you. Well, the prince's birthday was commonly celebrated by the entire kingdom, he supposes it wasn't to weird you're here.. But why is there a crowd around you? and why are you standing so close to his brother?! And then, once he got a bit closer, he could finally hear what you were saying

-"Why, your majesty, King of tomatoes may just be a better fitting title for you!"

-Oh. Oh no no no no no- he just came to terms with having a crush on you, and now you practically throw yourself into prison?! He knows you're naive, but to openly insult the king?! Even as the second prince he won't be able to save you from prison!

-Leona is panicking to say the least, just as he is about to try and intervene and stop you from being thrown into prison for the rest of your live, he suddenly hears his brother..laugh? The guards stand in their place, a few people in the crowd giggling, as his brother and his sister-in-law are full on laughing.

-He just stands there shocked, till Falena finally notices him. "Leona! how nice of you to finally grace us with your presence! I believe you have yet to meet my Jester?" Jester?! It would explain the situation.. "No, we have met before.."

-respond to his intense stare with a smile, and suddenly he is looking away and blushing ever so slightly

-Suddenly your 'naivety' makes so much sense. You aren't naive, you just love your work so much, you continue to do it outside of working hours

-The rest of the night he spends silently observing you, while having to deal with chekas antics

-You best believe, that the next time you two hang out, he'll be confronting you, very much wanting to know why you didn't tell him- You probably thought he already knew, since, y'know, he's part of the royal family and all

-This, along with his crush on you, gave him a great Idea. As a second prince, he isn't required to marry a woman, since he doesn't need an heir.. So not only is he free to marry you, he would get to take his brothers favorite Jester from him. For once, he'd be the one to take something from his brother, instead of the other way around!

-Of course, that isn't the only reason he wants to marry you, dear reader, this lion is head over heels for you- he's just to stubborn to admit it :)

Ruggie

-You and Ruggie have probably already been close for a while, maybe you even have already gone on a date or two!

-And yet, he has yet to know what you do for work. But he does know that you make A LOT of money! He wouldn't just like you for the money, but if you're the kind of person to use at least a small amount to help those in need like himself by giving to charity, or paying for the meals he takes back home for the kids of the slum during the holidays, then that is a definitely one of the reason he fell for you

-He did notice how openly you insulted the King, and he can't say he minds, that man has so much money, and is supposed to take care of his kingdom, and yet there are still kids growing up the way he did.

-Nonetheless, he usually stops you when your 'naive' enough to Joke about the King in the open, he doesn't need you going to prison, you pay for so many of his meals! He is genuinely in love with you, but just like Leona, too stubborn to admit it

-Until one day, he once again stops you from Insulting the king in public and you reply with a simple "Why? King Tomato-head even said I'd get a raise for that Joke!"

-"Wait what? What do you mean by that??" - If you translated Ruggies expression into words

-"Oh yeah, I'm the Royal Jester! Did I never tell you that?" No, no you did not- but it does explain a lot to Ruggie, why, no matter how much you joked in the open, the guards never went after you, why you were willing to insult the king at all.. You weren't naive, you were just doing your job!

-...Do you think you could also get him a job as jester? He knows a court usually has more than one Jester, and apparently it pays well!.. But that would mean he would spent his holidays at the castle instead of with his grandma and the slum kids. Yeah, he'll leave the Jesting to you

-But suddenly, instead of stopping you from telling your jokes, he'll help you come up with them! He knows, that the funnier a Jester is, the more they'll get paid, and you best believe he's making sure you bring home that bag!!

-...Also, maybe if you have a holiday off, you'd be willing to come with him to the slums and perform for the kids? He can only imagine how exited they would be to see the performance of an actual jester.

-If you say yes, he'd literally be willing to marry you on the spot, he's already picking a venue

Tbh, not that proud of Leonas part, the words didn't wanna word- But I'm still pretty proud of myself nonetheless ngl

Also, two posts in one day, I feel so productive-

I hope you enjoyed! Feedback is welcomed, just be nice :)

Have a lovely day/night!

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twst #twst x reader #headcanons #twisted wonderland headcanons #twst headcanons #writing #leona kingsholar x reader #twst leona #leona kingscholar #leona x reader #twst ruggie #ruggie bucchi x reader #ruggie x reader #ruggie bucchi #x reader #paradise writing ✍🏻

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milk-ly · 2 months ago

Text

Do you ever think about how Kotoko was pretty much Fuuta’s ideal self.

They both wanted to be the same thing, a long-awaited hero, but Kotoko actually “succeeded” while Fuuta “failed.” And that’s also how we judged them in t1. The fanbase thought of Kotoko as the strong, cool vigilante who took down a bad guy, but Fuuta was viewed as a brutish coward who hid behind a screen and killed an innocent teenager.

You could partially link that to the fact that in the end, their convictions were very different. Kotoko has supposed strong convictions but Fuuta seems to parrot things he probably heard on twitter to reinforce himself that he DOES have "strong convictions" like a hero/vigilante (like kotoko) does. Yet, his actual goal was never really Justice at all. Rather, it was all just to gain acceptance and connection. You can especially see that with how Fuuta stands firm in his ideals like he does with others but then immediately jumps to try and connect with Kotoko and impress her by parroting her words and opinions because he craves acceptance from someone whom he respects in some way.

Fuuta: "Ahh, yeah, Norway! The famous thing they have there!" This man clearly had absolutely never heard of it before until Kotoko brought it up. And he immediately pretended like he knew what she was talking about.

Another aspect is Fuuta's insecurities about how he doesn’t measure up to his ideals of being a strong, independent and responsible man. Like his want to protect others despite his cowardice. Or like how his ideal self in bring it on is seemingly taller and more confident.

Yet, Kotoko has constant traits and connections to masculinity (here's a great post about it by purgemarchlockdown) such as being tall, possessing fighting ability, not wearing more traditionally feminine clothes, and possessing traditionally masculine traits like strength and stoicism. Even stories about werewolves were traditionally more about men. While witch hunts, which Fuuta is connected to, mainly convicted women.

There's also the fact that Fuuta craves ally ship and Kotoko seems to be more well-liked than Fuuta even though they’re both rather standoffish. In fact, you actually see Fuuta going out of his way to interact with others (in his own way) more than Kotoko is throughout t1. (I believe he's the first character to give someone else a physical gift, even if it's just a tomato. And insists on giving Shidou his spinach in return when Shidou wants to give him his natto)

Here, Fuuta is the one who actually approached Mikoto to check on him. Fuuta cares and makes SOME effort to have a good relationship with others he's just uh. He's trying, okay.

Yet, in t1 at least, a good portion of the others generally disliked him or looked down on him in some way. Kotoko on the other hand was in pretty good terms with everyone until t2. (Aside from Mikoto, but that's because Kotoko doesn't like him, not the other way around) And considering the fact that Fuuta wants that acceptance so bad, Kotoko has that ideal.

And side note, do you ever think about how their murders frame both Kotoko and Fuuta’s ideal self as fallen heroes tainted by blood?

Or how these two saw each other as pretty similar at first before their true differences hit them both in the face?

And also how Fuuta starts t1 by seeing Es (and you) as the enemy but then draws a direct parallel between him and Es (and you) in t2? But Kotoko does the exact opposite, starting out in T1 and T2 trying to team up because of your similarities, and then ends up seeing you as weak by the end?

Ohhh 03 + 10 character foils…

#so how’s hiatus treating you guys #milgram #fuuta kajiyama #kotoko yuzuhira #Milkly ramble

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copperbadge · 8 months ago

Note

RE watching thoughts: I’m not 100% sure, but it might be that the whole “I am not my thoughts” is about engaging and identifying with your metacognition MORE than your initial thoughts. Because I get where you’re coming from - what is a consciousness but a collection of thoughts and feelings? But you can also have thoughts about your own thoughts that are more useful for dealing with whatever situation you’re in, I guess. (Random aside - every time I start thinking about thinking about thinking my brain inevitably starts thinking about Tiffany Aching and The Wee Free Men.)

I really should have replied to this ask sooner because it's going to seem like a non-sequitur now (this was sent much earlier in March) but I'm kind of glad I didn't, because I've been chatting with people about this and I think I understand more why there's an emphasis in some therapies on the idea that we are not our thoughts.

(I uh, haven't read the Tiffany books so I'm not much help there.)

I am coming to understand that many, perhaps most, people judge themselves, comprehensively and harshly, based on their thoughts. Perhaps it's just a lot of people who struggle with mental health, but given the commonality of the sentiment I don't know if I'd confine it that tightly; generally it appears that people cannot conceive of themselves as anything other than a binary of good or bad. So many people I've talked to about this portion of DBT, the watching-questioning-identifying thoughts portion, say that it helps to snap them out of a spiral of "I'm a horrible person, I deserve to suffer/die, I can never be redeemed" after they've failed at something, or had a negative thought, or reacted poorly to an unexpected event.

That is not something I've ever experienced. I mean, jokingly maybe, but not in a real, internal sense.

And that's not to brag -- I'm not saying I think I'm a good person, either, because I don't think I'm a good person. I don't conceive of myself in terms of good or bad. I never cuddle my cats and think "I'm such a good cat dad" or forget to feed them and think "I should die now." I have a perpetual morally neutral attitude towards my own existence; my thoughts and actions might trend me one direction or another but I'm aware of the temporary nature of that. If I fuck up I'll worry about who I might have hurt or whether I'll be fired or what's going to happen as a consequence, if I am polite to someone who didn't deserve it I know I was acting kindly in the moment, but I don't make an inherent moral judgement of myself based on that. And it seems like the vast majority of people do. Which you would think would make me feel pretty good about myself, but honestly...I don't know.

A lot of people I know who have ADHD or are Autistic have talked about seeing themselves as other, as alien -- like that one webcomic artist who draws themself with little antennae to indicate they're strange and different. I've always understood why one might do that, but I never felt that way myself, before or after the diagnosis. After all, let's remember, I was The Normal* Child of my siblings, and if I was The Normal One before the diagnosis, why wouldn't I remain Mostly Normal after?

* As ever, I'm using "normal" as a cultural term, to indicate what we think of as mainstream, not because normal is a thing that really exists.

My life has been relatively solitary -- I have friends and family and I love them but I'm rarely part of a large group, I don't spend a lot of time out in public interacting with people, I'm not a big socializer. Before the Adderall, I really couldn't be, I took too much psychic damage from interpersonal interaction, so I chose those very carefully. And now my DBT class has been a rare moment when I'm encountering contradictions to a lot of my assumptions about the way human beings in our society interact, react, and behave. I just...don't fit that mold very well. I think of it as having crossed wiring, not in the sense that I'm faulty but just in the sense that I'm very, very different. Not Normal. It's not exactly a bad feeling but it's certainly not a great one, internalizing the sensation of alienness.

DBT is proving to be a mixed bag but not in the way I or my therapist intended -- it seems to be either things I was already instinctively doing or things that simply do not apply to me. In one way it's disappointing because it means there isn't much help to be had (we're a little over halfway through the course and I keep thinking "Maybe next class will be useful") but on the other hand it's validating that so much of what I came up with myself as unconscious coping mechanisms is literally what I would have been told to do anyway.

Sometimes it's a combination of both, though, which really blows. I guess most people, if they reframe another person's actions, actually find emotional relief in that, and I don't. An example from the class is that if someone is rude to you, you can consider how they might be having a hard day, and be polite in return; that's great, in terms of defusing a situation, and it's something I do a fair amount of. But apparently it's also something that for most people results in feeling less awful about the interaction, and that's not the case for me. Which is why so much of DBT feels to me like lying to oneself. It's not lying for most people.

So, yeah. I'm going to finish out the course and keep trying things with the therapist but I suspect given everything, I might already be at "as good as it gets" in terms of emotional work. Which isn't the worst thing in the world, and there is still the option to try medication that could help, but I think there will come a point where I'm going to have to deal with the fallout of just how different I am, and how that has impacted my life. Might end up a good thing; something I've really been trying to resolve is unhappiness over being unpartnered and highly likely to remain that way, and at least if this provides a better understanding of why, then perhaps I can process that and put it to rest in a way I've been trying to do but not succeeding well at.

So, we'll see. But I find it both fascinating and kind of horrifying how many people can believe they are irredeemably bad, even if the belief is only temporary, simply because they had an uncharitable thought or impulse. It makes me somewhat grateful for the crossed wires, at least.

#sam has adhd #therapy #dbt

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thecarnivorousmuffinmeta · 3 months ago

Note

What do you think L thinks of the successor program?

Previous Thoughts on Wammy's and How the Concept is both Bonkers and Toxic

Well, what we see is pretty damning.

L... Doesn't Talk About it Much and Other Bad Signs

L brings up the successor program once in the manga (this line is removed from the anime adaptation). It's a very one-off line in which he tells Light (while still in the college arc) that "you know, even if you were to kill me, L is legion and I'd just be replaced by the next L" and Light sort of stares at him.

Neither touch on this ever again.

Worse, when the torch is passed, it's only because Watari happened to be in the room where he could push The Big Red Button (TM) that sent information to Wammy's. And yes, while there was clearly a protocol in place to let the successors take on L's legacy, it uh... sure wasn't L pushing that button and the fact that it's a secret button in the security room where Watari hangs out (and certainly not L) leads me to think this is a Watari idea (the orphanage where people compete for the title of L, being in fact, Watari's weird fucking idea).

Most tellingly, L doesn't even bring it up when he knows he's going to die. He doesn't even think to himself "ah yes, those bratty twelve-year-olds in England will get vengeance for me and then Light will be put to justice". L doesn't think about the Wammy program at all in his last day, in fact, he knew for several hours he was going to die and he didn't seek out any means to bring his successors in or even think "oh woe that Light is right there or I could inform my secret successors of everything we need to know".

We learn later that Near and Mello never actually met L, in fact, and if they ever did speak to him it was... brief and impersonal. This leaves them both with weird complexes about the man and their relationship with the role of successor.

In fact, L blatantly says "Light is my successor" and seems to mean it. True, L knew Light was Kira and was perhaps doing this for the mind fuckery, but on the other hand he had no reason to do this and again, had time to take it back once he realized Light was Kira again (which he did very quickly after Light got his memories back). Had L not done this, he could have either a) directly had a Wammy's person take over and explain the whole successor thing (he does not) or b) left it such that Soichiro was in charge. He has nothing to gain by even hinting that Light could take control over his title after he left. And the fact is... Light does do it. He's the power behind L for six years while Near and Mello do... well, Mello joins the mafia and has a time in Nevada, Near does who fucking knows what.

Basically, L couldn't be less supportive of the Wammy's orphanage unless he actively shut it down and fired Watari (but then who would bring him snacks?)

But Why?

L's in it for personal victory. L wants to beat Kira himself, he wants to do it on his own terms, with his own ingenuity. It's not so much about beating Kira but the fact that he will be the one to beat Kira. His 'successors' doing so would be less than meaningless to L.

Leaving it to some twelve-year-old to solve, hand-picked by Watari because they solved puzzles good and read good too, would be worse for L than fucking Matsuda or Misa making a major break in the case (and canonically, both those things happen, and canonically L handles it fucking poorly).

Worse, Watari is not even implying, but outright saying, that L is not so special a super genius snowflake and that Watari can cultivate another one simply through hard work and careful selection. "Congratulations, L, you are irrelevant and superfluous!" And worse, those replacements are little kids and I imagine L finds their quirks... annoying. (I'm not convinced L's not just s troll).

And if we take LABB into account, all L sees them do is kill themselves or make trouble for everyone (through murder). L does not want to deal with these people (and so he doesn't and makes Naomi do it for an entire hilarious novel).

TL;DR

L hates those fuckers.

#death note #death note meta #death note headcanon #l lawliet #wammy's houes #anti wammy's house #near #anti near #mello #anti mello #meta #headcanon #opinion

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redhoodinternaldialectical · 10 months ago

Note

Thoughts on Jason Todd’s choice of weaponry?

:D an ask! Yay!

Oooh, lets see, I'll start with the crowbars because I appear to be like one of three people on the entire planet who actually likes them.

They're a tacky as fuck riff on the fact that Jason's death is central to his character. They overemphasize the manner in which he died, muddy the waters about what part of his death is important to him, and strangely cheapens the manner in which he died through the parody feel of it.

No one seems to really disagree with my analysis here, but I happen to enjoy that about them and think it's very on brand for Jason. What can I say? They're fun!

Best Quality - His Wiggles

This ultra-sharp curved blade used to be his signature character design feature, the way the white streak in his hair is now, and I'm really not sure why it didn't stick!

Best weapon he's ever had, bring it back please!!!!!

The All-Blades

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM...

I have mixed feelings about the All-Blades. Like much of Lobdell's work: phenomenal idea, poor execution. Giving the guy who is most known for being morally grey a set of powers that is exclusively based on moral absolutes sucks shit, I gotta be honest, and the trick he pulled on the blood blade was cool but ultimately does nothing to solve those problems.

HOWEVER

I want to love them so fucking badly. A set of glowy soul blades is a dope sicknasty off the chain concept and I wish the well wasn't poisoned with the moral implications and the restrictions to use them only on the "Untitled", a set of enemies that only exist for Jason so far as I can tell. If someone seriously took Jason down a magic based path that removed the DnD alignment chart bullshit, I would be so game to see them come back! Hell I wouldn't even insist on a better cooler design for them!

...though uh, yeah those are the least interesting magic sword designs I've ever seen tbh

Normal Ass Swords

They're alright I guess. Like, there's nothing in it really, but it's not bad?

Guns - Real Bullets

Excellent, evocative yet simple, straightforwards and to the point. It makes hella sense thematically to boot, love this for him, please give him back his pistols and miniguns and shit

Guns - Rubber Bullets

Hate. HATE. hate ick disgusting bad NO.

I just fucking hate rubber bullets, like, as a concept. I refuse to accept "non-lethal" bullets as a valid use of gun, either in real life or in fiction. Guns are for putting many holes in things very fast!!!! If you're gonna use a gun, fucking well own up to that!!! Do not play this silly ass game of pretending that you can change out the material and do the same things as with lead bullets but with the video game status effect of "non-lethal" applied. YOU ARE GIVING PEOPLE SMALL CIRCULAR BRUISES. This is still harmful, yes, ooph ouchie, but it is not even slightly a good use of a gun, you are wasting holster space, and carry weight, and the physical materials used to make it all!!

JUST USE A FUCKING STICK! YOU DON'T RUN OUT OF STICK AMMO!

My belief in his capacity to take out enemies is shattered the instant those fuckers are on panel. Maybe this ain't entirely rational, or realistic to how fights go with rubber bullets IRL, but I hate them so much on principle that I will ignore any counterargument you might have that they'd work. I will die on this hill. Rubber bullets BAD. Please stop making him use this!!

Bombs

Love it, give him more bombs forever

ka-BOOM!!!!

His Brain

This is actually his best weapon - sorry wiggly knife, you're being shunted down to number 2 on a last minute technicality! I think Jason is at his best when he's outsmarting people and making long term fucked up schemes to ruin people's lives.

He's so good at it! It's so fun to watch him do it!

Genuinely a shame that this facet of him was mostly lost after Flashpoint, though to give credit where it is due, in Rebirth Jason did ruin the Penguin's life in an impressively elaborate way, which I did really enjoy. I want to see him be a tactical deliberate menace to one person in specific again idk, that's part of why I do kinda agree that he works better as an antagonist than a protagonist - which it should be noted does not mean I think he works better as a villain necessarily, his ethics aren't what matter here - he's just had his best moments as the schemer, and it's hard to have a protagonist schemer even when you make them ethically the good guy.

I hope you enjoyed my nattering on about Jason's weapons :D thank ye again for ask!

#jason todd #damian's tomfoolery

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freak-accident419 · 11 months ago

Text

Good Looking Boy

Billy (Burn 2019) x GN!Reader

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

Summary: On a chilly December night, you and Billy catch up. Then, you make an important decision.

Word Count: 3.1k

Content: gender neutral reader, fluff, cursing, alcohol, mention of holidays (gift giving), slight suggestive comment

(A/n: thank you to everyone for all your support for this short multiple-part fic! It means so much to me! I hope I did its finale justice :) also credit to the person who suggested a bar scene !)

You watched him take a short sip of his beer as you fidgeted with your bottle.

You two agreed that you would catch up at this bar at the corner of the street when you were done with your shift. It has only been a few weeks since you’ve last seen him, but it felt like forever to you, hence the slight awkwardness in the atmosphere.

“So… did you pay off your debt…?” You ask hesitantly, continuing to fidget with the beer bottle in front of you. You finally looked at him, observing his brown eyes softening at the sight of you. The right side of his face was still scarred by the second-degree burn that hot coffee gave him. But you’ve only ever seen him like this, and so, to you, he still looked as handsome as he was since you last saw him.

“Yeah, I… I paid them off,” he answered bluntly.

“And the thing with the bikers? Are you… on good terms with them now?”

In response, he let out a scoff and a quiet chuckle, shaking his head.

“Ugh, dude, what did you do?” You say with exasperation, though amused by his lighthearted manner.

“They wanted the money, but, um… They all sort of… still hate me, so… those assholes gave me a warning: if they see my face again, they’ll kill me, so…” He trails off, taking a fairly tame swig of alcohol before he continues. You noticed that he seemed calmer since you’ve last seen him. As if he worked on himself, his temper, and spontaneous vulgarity. You admired that. “I’m gonna have to go. Unwillingly leave town, you know.”

“Damn,” you mutter, briefly sipping your drink. “That was your initial plan anyways though, right? To, like, just leave this place?”

He let out a soft sigh, which slightly puzzled you. Why did he seem so disappointed?

“Before I was on my way to meet up with them, I just… I got the idea that maybe I just shouldn’t leave. I thought that, um… leaving someplace that’s, uh… desirable… would be a very idiotic thing for me to do,” he explains, only baffling you even more.

“Okay? But you said it yourself, after you paid them off, you wanted to leave town and start anew, have a fresh start. What makes Upstate New York so… great, I guess, that you don’t want to leave?” You inquire with a lighthearted chuckle.

He fidgets with his beer bottle anxiously before looking back at you to answer. “You…”

You were stunned. You opened your mouth slightly to respond, but no words came out. You didn’t know him too well—but after an hour of being stuck together, you knew him enough, at the very least. But why did you have such an impact on him? You guessed that you had an indubitable liking for him too—similar to a childlike crush, though fueled solely by shared trauma. But you never really thought of it that much until now.

“Billy, I…” you stuttered out. “I… I mean… You had a whole plan, I… I just don’t understand. I like you, Billy, but… why should I be the reason you would want to stay here? You don’t really know me…”

“Well…” He wanted to argue that you two already learned a lot about each other from the time you’ve spent together, but even he realized it would be faulty reasoning. “Fuck, I want to get to know you better, then,” he urged gently.

He looked down at your hands, which were on the table near your drink. He reached his hands towards yours hesitantly, giving you a look by the raise of his eyebrows that asked for your permission. You nodded, watching him finally grab your hands, observing your one wrist, in which the bruise from the zip tie was completely gone. He tenderly rubbed his thumb over your wrists and palms. You felt the warm metal of his ring run against your skin as he would move his index finger. The slightly red dent on his wrist that you last saw on the day you escaped had also disappeared entirely. So it seemed like the only thing that followed him—the only thing that haunted him ever since the gas station, was his burn scar.

“I just…” he began, continuing to look down at your hands as he caressed them. It was something he did a lot, you noticed. You think it calmed him down. “I don’t know why I’m so… pulled to you. It’s fucking stupid, I know, and I’ve probably sounded like a dumbass this entire time, but… I mean it when I say I want to get to know you.”

You stared down at your hands in his, unsure of how you felt. “Well… The bikers, they said that they were gonna kill you if they see your face again. That’s, like… implying they want you out of town. You have to go, Billy. You can’t, shit, risk your life for me.”

“That’s why I want you to run away with me,” he urged softly.

“Billy—”

“I want you to come with me,” he pleads. In his mind, Billy thought it was quite ironic how he wanted you to go with him so badly; he rejected Melinda almost immediately when she asked to go with him. But this was different. You weren’t Melinda. You were you. And he desperately wanted to leave with you. But there seemed to be no way for that to happen.

“Billy, we already talked about this. I… I can’t just leave everything I have here behind,” you reason. “Plus, it’s been weeks ever since I last saw you. You had all this time to come see me, where have you been?”

He pursed his lips. “After the bikers gave me a few ‘friendly’ warning shots, I sort of left immediately. I just kept going west. Stayed in a couple motels. But it just… felt wrong, you know? I felt empty and… fuck, out of place… So, I guess I just… came back here to see you one more time…” he confessed, making your heart beat faster and face warmer. Nobody has ever done this grand of a gesture for you. You almost felt bad. You had made a deep connection with him back at the gas station, and suddenly you were worth a lot to him. “Shit, I… I honestly couldn’t stop thinking about you. I wanted to, because I knew it would be… really fucking bad if I tried to come back, but… You were always on my mind. Every second, I… thought about your laughter, and your voice, and I didn’t want to forget it. And-and most of all, you saved my life.” You frowned, because you considered it as a team effort, rather. “Something finally good in my life, for the first fucking time, happened to me and I can’t just—just stand by and let it just leave while I could do something about it.”

You were surprised, to say the least. You never knew you could be this important to someone, let alone someone you’ve only been around with for less than a day. “Billy, I—” You stammered with fluster. “I have to admit, I thought about you multiple times ever since. I sort of always wished I’d run into you whenever I went to a gas station. I think I even dreamed about you multiple times… To be honest, I always thought what would’ve happened if I said yes before and left with you.” He felt your thumb trace delicately along the back of his hand. “Never thought I’d ever think of a gas station robber as handsome and charming.” He chuckled softly in response, his lips forming into a cute, flattered smile.

“I love that you’re here, really. I love that you came back to see me,” You told him. “But… like I said, I can’t come with you.” You would love to, however, you knew it. But you couldn’t just leave everything you had here behind… Could you?

He sighed softly. “Okay, I understand,” he says. “But shit, just… Let me get to know you better before I have to leave for sure. Please. How about I just take you for a drive, then? Just around the block?”

Billy was heavily insistent. After all, he always goes for what he wants.

“The both of us have been drinking, Billy,” you say with guilt. You hated constantly rejecting him. You did want to get to know him better, you did want to spend time with him, but the circumstances and motives were utterly complicated.

You chuckled a bit, however, sort of amused by how much he wanted to be around you. “I don’t know, you can’t just, like… enjoy the moment right now?” You ask as you two look back down at your hands, which were being gently rubbed against each other, Billy’s thumb caressing the back of your hand.

“I don’t know if that’s gonna be enough for me, Y/n,” he claimed dejectedly.

“Why don’t we just take a walk, then? To, like, the nearest park or something,” you offer, feeling his warm fingertips glide softly over your nails. “We could… We could do that.”

After thinking about it for a second, he nodded compliantly.

***

It was supposed to be dark outside, however the street lamps nearby and string lights across buildings liberally illuminated the area. It has been probably half an hour since you two sat down on a park bench, just speaking to each other with occasional banter. That was probably the strongest thing you had with him: communication. Just talking about random things that led to discovering more things about one another. You’d done that while you were tied up together after all. It was how you mainly connected in that moment.

That was another thing, however. You weren’t forced in proximity anymore, but you two still wanted more of each other. Even if you didn’t show it. Your rejection did quite a number on Billy’s belief that his feelings were reciprocated, but as you two proceeded to laugh and talk together, it was reinforced.

“Okay… Quentin Tarantino.” You raise an eyebrow, grinning as you watched your warm breath escape your lips in a hazy, white mist.

“Damn. That one foot fetish guy?” he laughed.

“Yeah, the—the foot fetish guy,” you chuckle softly.

“Okay, easy, Pulp Fiction,” he answered. Met with your silence, he looked at you and you shook your head, smiling. “No?”

“No, I wouldn’t make it that obvious—”

“Kill Bill.”

“N—”

“Volume one or two?” You grin as he continued to guess wrong in your game. “Seriously, none of those?”

“From Dusk Til Dawn?” He nearly pouted, it was adorable. “I give up.”

“Jackie Brown. C’mon, man,” you snicker.

He playfully rolled his eyes, scoffing, making you giggle.

This was something you two did back at Paradise Pumps as well, while tied up and exhausted. You made a little game where you basically had to think of a movie and the other had to guess it by only knowing the name of its director.

He smiles softly as he looks at you, but then it gradually dropped, as the recurring thought that he would never see you again invaded his mind once more.

“You good?” You ask reluctantly, seeing his facial expression change.

“Yeah, I just…”

“You don’t want to leave me?” You finish his sentence with a sigh, seeing him nod in response. “It’s not so bad, Billy. You could leave, settle down, start a new life and leave behind all that crime and… biker gang beef,” you offer a small laugh before you continue.

“You could find somebody who is worthier than me. Someone who you didn’t bond with through shared trauma and forced proximity. Someone who would leave everything behind just for you, unlike me.” You wish you could, honestly. What was really stopping you? Fear? Guilt?

Billy scoffs as he listened to your statements, deeming them as bullshit. “Y/n, respectfully, shut the fuck up.” Your eyebrows raise in bewilderment. “I don’t want someone else, okay? I want you... Just you.”

Your heart nearly stopped and you looked at him with sole adoration for him.

And you had no idea what came over you in this moment, because once you heard him say this, you immediately pressed your lips to his, while hesitantly bringing your hands up to his face to gently hold it.

You heard his breath hitch as he soon melts into the kiss, moving his lips with yours and holding onto your wrists. His lips were soft and warm, and he was being nothing but gentle with you. You felt the the tender skin of his burn against your fingertips, your delicate and careful touch soothing him.

You weren’t sure what kind of confidence boost let you do something so impulsive as kissing someone. But the entire night, Billy had been relentlessly winning over your heart, expressing his immense admiration for you. You fell for him. And you had to do something about that.

“Fuck, you know, that…” he began hoarsely once your lips have separated, yet your faces were still very close to each other, switching back and forth from looking deeply into one’s eyes to their lips. “That was fucking evil. That just made it even harder for me to leave you,” he stressed as you two let out small, quiet chuckles.

He convinced you enough, you thought. What did you really have to lose…?

Or, rather, what would you gain?

“You don’t have to,” your voice was slightly raspy as you spoke with a smirk.

And what you would say next had marked your decision. “I’m coming with you, cowboy.”

He parted his lips in shock, so before he could say anything, you just kissed him again, deeply and affectionately, as you couldn’t help but smile in the kiss. You felt him pull you closer by the waist in a fairly strong grip, as if you were to disappear if he let you go. It was a sweet and affectionate kiss, the two of you expressing your admiration and fondness for each other. It was supposed to be cold, hell, it was December in New York. But you couldn’t help but feel pure warmth each second your kiss remained.

*** Two Weeks Later ***

“Open it,” you giggle softly.

“Seriously, when did you get the time to wrap a whole ass gift when we’ve been, like, on the road together this whole time?” Billy says with a smile as he examines the thin, neatly wrapped box in his hands.

“I found a service. While you were preoccupied. Now shut up. Happy Holidays. Open the damn thing.”

It’s been about two weeks since you agreed with leaving with him. After resigning from your job, you basically packed your bags and savings and he picked you up. You two didn’t face any problems so far as you traveled east. You only had an increased admiration for each other, as well as mutual understandings.

Now, you were in an empty parking lot, keeping warm inside the car during the evening. You surprised him with a wrapped gift for the holidays.

You watched him rip off the wrapping paper, making you involuntarily laugh as you saw his expression of disbelief, represented by his playful scoff and the rolling of his eyes.

‘Never Get Angry Again: The Foolproof Way to Stay Calm and in Control in Any Conversation or Situation’ by David J. Lieberman, PhD

He raised his eyebrows as he read over the cover of the anger management book and presented it to you. “Seriously?”

You snicker impishly as you see an amused smile creep at the corner of his lips. “Told you I would, didn’t I?”

“You are terrible,” Billy joked endearingly with a low chuckle.

“I know,” you retort cunningly, reaching over the center console of the car to give him a soft peck on the lips.

“But you have to admit, Y/n, I have been working on myself ever since,” he points out, making you scoff.

“Yeah, but you totally lashed out on that one guy when we were at that convenience store in Pittsburgh,” you insist.

“Okay, well, in my defense, I really didn’t like the way he was looking at you,” he shrugged with a knowing grin.

“Damn, should I have gotten you a book on jealousy as well?” you sneer.

“Hey, watch it,” he warned playfully.

“You know what, yeah, you’re right. I digress,” you concur nonchalantly. “If it weren’t for him getting an intense reaction out of you, then you wouldn’t have taken me straight to the bathroom and—”

“Okay, okay, that’s enough,” he chuckled softly as you laughed at your own delivery. “Just…” He reached in the back, grabbing a brown box that was sealed with clear tape. “Open your gift. Sorry I didn’t have the time to wrap it, like, I still have no idea how you had the time to do it behind my back, but yeah.”

He handed you his keys so you could rip the tape, then you opened the box, being met with styrofoam packaging. You removed the top layer, and then let out a small gasp as you saw the object, taking it in your hands.

It was a small Albany, New York snow globe. You were beaming as you shook it, watching the “snow” fall down on the capitol building.

“I thought you’d be homesick, so I snatched it right before we left,” he explained, smiling as he sees your reaction.

“Oh my god, Billy, it’s perfect,” you say in awe, then reach over the center console again to hug him tightly, feeling his arms wrap around you. “Thank you so much,” you say, kissing him deeply on his lips.

“‘F course, Y/n,” he mumbled sweetly, affectionately returning your kisses.

“You’re perfect,” you nearly whispered as you set the snow globe back in the box so your hands were free to hold his face. He always loved when you would do that. It brought a sort of comfort to him, making him feel safe and secure. He leaned into your touch as you kissed the right side of his face—his forehead and cheek—which were the areas that had been mildly burnt.

“Even when I robbed a gas station?” He asked under his breath, raising an eyebrow.

“Seriously?”

He always had a problem with being defined and associated with criminality, so you found it quite ironic for him to point it out.

“I’m fucking with you.”

You shove him playfully, which only resulted in him bringing you into an intense, deep kiss. “You are so perfect too, you know that?” He mutters softly. “I’m so fucking glad you came with me.” He artfully grabbed your hand and looked at you intimately as he pressed a gentle kiss to your wrist—the one that was zip tied to his. The one where the bruise on it had now been fully healed and gone.

“Me too,” you murmur ardently.

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spitefulverse · 1 year ago

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Composure / Miguel O'Hara

Summary: You work close with Miguel at the HQ, having an exceptionally high rank for your age, and daily, Miguel has to compose himself, refusing to let a simple girl ruin him. Or let himself, ruin her.

Warnings: Ten year legal age gap, reader is 21, Miguel is 31. Cussing, implied sexual tension, implied reader has thick thighs, slow burn, very smutty sex at end, praise, p in v, unprotected sex, cream pie, idfk. miguel pushing himself away and being emo. NOT PROOFREAD 4.6k words.

You sighed, a wave of tiredness smacking you directly in the face as it hit the third our of your day in the HQ, while you loved your job, it grew tedious. And here you were, picking up coffee for you and Miguel, like some intern, however he had the decency to give you his credit card, stating "Get yourself something, I'm not a dick"

You held two, warm, grande coffees in your hands as you walked into Miguel's office, he sat at his desk, fiddling with his watch, mumbling away to Lyla, you couldn't actually hear the conversation but his voice sounded displeased and unhappy. "Uh, Mr O'Hara" You cleared your throat, standing in the doorway, shuffling from foot to foot as his crimson stare slowly but surely traveled up your body, lingering on your lower half. His sunken eyes looked into yours, raising a hand to usher you over. "Thanks Lyla, you can go" He commented, eyes not leaving your frame and with that Lyla quickly dissipated, shooting you a smile as she did so. Slowly, you sauntered over, unbeknownst to why he made you feel so shrunken and quiet.

You would go into his office angry every time and without a doubt, skittishly leave his room, every time, crushing on him, thinking about how good he looks. Sometimes hes pacing, or leaning against the wall, or looking out the window in the back of the room, but every time, he seems to have an effect on you.

"Was there any issues, chiquita?" He asked, reaching out for his coffee, his large, calloused hand brushing against yours as you handed him it. Chiquita, you had googled it after he repeatedly called you it since you became more or less acquaintances, it can either be a term of endearment, like little one or little gift or it is what you would call a little girl, you hope it isn't the latter. The thought that every time he said it, he could be calling you ‘little one’ always made you bite the inside of your cheek, getting a bit giddy at the thought of him. There wasn't a time you saw him where he wasn't referring to you as ‘Chiquita’

You smiled "not at all, other than me feeling bad about using your card" You then pulled the card out of your waistband, having it tucked just between your shirt and skirt, placing that on the desk. His deep, red eyes followed your every move, watching your hands, lost in thought about how dainty they looked, he shook his head just slightly. "No, don't feel bad, i sent you on a coffee run, it's the least i could do, muñeca" He hummed, taking a drink from his coffee.

Even sat in his chair, he looked big, he was almost matching your height, broad shoulders covering the back of the seat. You nodded in response to him before looking around nervously, like you couldn't find the words to say, nor did you know what you wanted to say.

"Well, i appreciate it" That means a lot coming from him. "I do, but i need to get back to work, querida, is there anything you need?" He asked, voice hoarse, he slouched back into his chair, legs widespread and chest puffed out just slightly, a sight that you would think about for days. Timidly, you shook your head, giving him a small wave to which he quirked a brow and with little to no effort, lifted just his hand from the arm rest, tilting it to signal a silent goodbye as you turned on your heel and quietly stepped out the room.

Little did you know, his eyes burned into you as you walked away, watching your hips and thighs which were only held back by a short skirt and transparent pantyhose, something he sometimes considered you purposefully wore to drive him mad. He sighed, lifting his arm to pinch the bridge of his nose. "idiota, idiota, idiota" He quietly scolded himself under his breath. He took a sip of his coffee, inhaling, and somehow even the coffee had your scent laced upon it, he groaned, placing it down and getting back to work.

He had morals, while they were obscure and some would say disagreeable or incorrect, one of his morals was that he wouldn't flirt with a coworker ten years younger than him simply because she's pretty and intelligent, no, he didn't have time for mindless activities like that. But, fuck, you were really on his mind these days, and you were getting harder to resist.

Later that day he walked out of his office, straightening himself up and striding down the corridor, focusing on his watch to avoid meaningless conversation however something broke his focus. It was the sweet smell of your perfume and the light sound of your voice, he knew you were nearby and he silently cursed himself for leaving the confinement of his office. As if on command, you walked into his vision, chatting with another spiderman, showing the guy some papers in which he seemed extremely enthusiastic about. Miguel furrowed his brows, eyeing the situation, noticing the guy placing an hand on your shoulder, he came to a halt, a few meters away and cleared his throat.

Nervously, the younger spiderman looked up at him before looking down at his daypass, which wasn’t doing anything, and speaking up. "Uh, i have a thing in like five minutes, i have to- well- I'll see you" The man turned to you, smiling before bolting off, Miguel didn't bother to look at him, just looking at you. It was a hot day, in the HQ, especially with all the windows, you had unbuttoned the first few buttons of your blouse, exposing just enough of your chest to make his throat feel blocked.

Apprehensively, you questioned him "Are you okay? Did you need something.." Your voice was quiet and meek, he sighed, closing his eyes for a moment to compose himself, repeating, she's too young, over and over again in his head. "Yeah, sorry, chiquita..um- i just needed to ask you.."

His hair was pushed back, probably from how often he was brushing it out of his face in stress, his cheekbones seemed more defined than ever and his muscles squeezed at his suit as he drifted into thought, you could see his eyes faltering over your figure for a moment but you thought it was unlikely he was checking you out, so with a smile, you chuckled "Ask me.."

"What- Did.. you get the stats on earth 473?" He asked, running a hand through his hair, there it is, the reason it's slicked back. "I did" You exclaimed "It was super hard- walk with me” you interrupted your own words “buttt, me, the amazing one.." You giddily spoke, beginning to walk away, he followed, almost feeling like you were walking him like a dog, as he listened closely, eyes not leaving you. "i managed to find some old reports in the system, use the code from them, convert it back into the new report and boom, fresh, we now have all the information we need to make sure the canon events happen" You stopped in front of your office, turning to face him and smiling even brighter.

"Wow..well- thank you, dulzura, i didn't expect you to actually do it" He placed his hands on his waist, eyebrows raised and eyes soft "I'm pleasantly surprised"

You looked up at him, accidentally giving him puppy dog eyes due to his height. "yeah?" you bit your lip.

"Yeah good girl, email them to me, ok? then if you want..go home,you finish in an hour, it's hot and you've worked your ass off" He responded, averting his gaze to his watch to sort something quickly. Your cheeks felt hot at the nickname and your heart swelled at how nice he was being to you. "Thank you Mr O'hara" You jumped a little before going into your office, he just snickered, giving himself a pat on the back for how he handled the situation, he managed to not pounce on you in front of everyone, that means something.

Good girl. Good Girl, it was new. You couldn't stop thinking about how proud he looked, about the tone of his voice as he praised you, imagining if he would act the same in bed. It kept you up most of the night, thinking about him, had he interrupted the man flirting with you out of jealousy or by chance. Did he let just any coworker use his card, you doubted it, if you were in the HQ you'd ask Lyla, but there was no AI in your apartment. Once you finally fell asleep, managing to shush your thoughts about your very own boss, Miguel, your alarm rang not long after.

With a tired groan, you got up, changing into a smart dress, expecting heat so no pantyhose, the dress reached above your mid thigh but was professional enough, you were sure you had worn it before. With haste, you ate and made your way into the office, early as usual, deciding to grab Miguel a coffee as a thanks for the early leave yesterday.

You found yourself at his door, just like the day before, gently knocking, knuckles meeting the hardwood with a quiet sound. "Come in" You heard him, his voice sounding disinterested. As you stepped in, his head didn't move, he was standing at the back of his room, looking out the window, his hands on his hips. His back looked huge and you desperately wanted to be engulfed in a tight hug by his large frame, he seemed focused, his watch flickering but he wasn't acknowledging it.

"Mr O'hara" You spoke up, voice loud but sheepish. Suddenly, he spun around, eyes a little wide as he looked at you. "Ah, angelito..I didn't realise it was you knocking, i wouldve been more-" polite, is what he wanted to say, but he stopped himself, composure, don't get comfy, don't let her get attached, he told himself "Nothing" He nodded at you, as if to say 'go on'

"I brought you a coffee..as a thanks for yesterday" You smiled, holding the coffee out with lightly shaking hands. Just then he noticed your appearance, eyes travelling over the dress, stopping at where it hugged your thighs perfectly. He cursed himself and walked over, taking the coffee, letting his middle finger rest on your hand, pausing your shaking.

His hand was warm, and just the slightest touch made you feel hot, your face flushed and you looked at him with wide eyes. "You nervous, chiquita?" He tilted his head, eyes dark as he removed his hand from yours, taking a sip of the coffee.

"No- not at all Mr O'Hara, just-"

"Miguel" He looked away, voice stern and plain. You were taken aback, furrowing your brows "huh?"

"Call me Miguel, no need for formality, this is my business after all." He then internally punched himself in the face, what the fuck was he saying.

"But-"

"Ah- shush muñeca, I mean it, thank you for the coffee, you shouldn't have, what was it you wanted?" He was quick with his points and quick to finish others, leaving no room for questioning. He calmly strode over to his desk, taking a seat in the chair behind it, leaning back into it. You were speechless.

"I just- well i don't want to..push you too far" You started, tiptoeing over and taking a seat in the chair opposite, to which he quirked a brow, stopping mid coffee sip, watching the way you crossed one leg over the other. "But, my work laptop, it's kind of.."

"Shit" He commented, finishing your sentence, placing his coffee down, then his forearms on the table as if he was really listening to you, sitting up straight before leaning slightly towards you "I know they are"

"exactly, so, and you can say no but please, do not shut me down." You pointed at him, tilting your head and giving him a pleading look. He lifted his hands just slightly in mock defense, not making a sound. "Could i please, please have an upgrade?" You put your hands together and gave him your best sad eyes. Fuck, you could have anything you wanted, if it wasn't for his morals. You looked so timid and precious from his angle, it made his body shaky.

He stared blankly at you, scarlet eyes half lidded and unimpressed at your childish begging, but in reality it honestly turned him on, he wanted you to be begging for other things. It almost grew into a staring contest, your big eyes meeting his dissatisfied ones for a short while. You didn't seem to be quitting, so he sighed, looking down and shaking his head "¿qué me estás haciendo chiquita?" (T:what are you doing to me, little girl/one?) He groaned, brushing his hair back, missing various strands which fell onto his forehead. "Okay. We'll get you an upgrade, but do not tell everyone at HQ because then i'll have everyone in that chair with puppy dog eyes" He grunted.

You smiled brightly "Thank you!" He was being abnormally nice, you thought maybe you had impressed him with your work enough to earn a soft spot in his heart, while that was true, but in reality he was falling more and more each day. You then noticed his messy hair that he couldn't seem to control, ignoring your thanks as he attempted to push it back.

"If i may..Miguel?" You stood, leaning over the desk, inches away from him, you still weren’t used to his first name.

"Hm?" He looked up from his desk to be eye level with your chest, eyes widening and throat growing choked up. You hummed back, taking it as enough confirmation to gently fix his hair for him, fingers gently padding away at the loose strands, brushing his face, it made you feel hot, knowing you were so close to him, bending over his desk, but how you wished it was for another reason.

He couldn't look away, admiring the sight in front of him, when he shifted his vision, he saw your frame bending over, he didn't know which was more provocative but either way the blood was rushing somewhere he couldn't deal with right now, yet he didn't move you, he waited patiently, enjoying the feeling of your hands in his hair.

Slowly, you stepped back, smiling shyly "much better" You uttered, standing straight, noticing his flushed face. He mumbled a 'thank you' before shifting in his seat, confusing you a little, he seemed to adjust himself before standing up. He waltzed around his desk and to your side "I'll walk you to your office, i have a meeting in that department soon anyway" He changed the subject, liar.

You nodded, letting yourself out the door, him behind you, walking at the same pace. When you peaked at him, you met his eyes, both of you looking away in a panic at simultaneously being caught staring and catching the other. He again, cursed himself, a quiet string of Spanish curse words filling your ears. You found yourself slowing your steps so that you could walk side by side, he definitely noticed but didn't acknowledge it. Your soft hands brushed against his calloused, scarred ones with every step, you could see him looking bashfully to the side in your peripheral vision.

You reached the office door you knew so well and he stopped, about half a meter away. "Miguel.." You still were not used to that "Can you come in for a sec? It'll be quick"

His brows knitted to form a frown as he crossed his arms over his chest, eyes scanning your face for any mischief or lies before nodding "Of course" You opened the door and stepped in, letting him follow.

"Shut the door" You announced, turning to face him, he raised his brows, shutting the door, mouth opening as if ready to speak, angrily."Don't, nothing weird..just wanna..talk?" You stepped in front of him, looking up at him, his tall figure intimidating and deathly, his scent filling your nose.

"Are you asking me a question or stating something?" His voice was inquisitive as he eyed you curiously, his body seeming to lean away from you, defensive. "I-" You grew nervous, his cardinal eyes boring into you, pupils blown and lip slightly snarling. "I?"

You could hear his breathing, he could hear yours, you were so close, you smelt so good, he wanted to kiss you so bad, but he held himself above office relationships, ignoring all his flirty thoughts. Your hand pressed to his chest as you let out a shaky breath, thoughts clouding your head as your eyes flicked from his eyes to his lips, biting down on your own at the thought of kissing him. He tensed at your touch but couldn't help leaning into it. "You're driving me insane" He muttered, taking your hand in his, bringing it to his lips and kissing it, the feeling making sparks fly, heart beating so quick you swore it would fly away, you couldn't help but gasp.

"Y/n, You know i can't act on my thoughts about you" He sighed, letting go of your hands but you grabbed his wrists, you knew deep down if he wanted to he could pull away easily. Why was he being so open, why wasn’t he leaving or pushing you away from him with force?

"What thoughts Miguel? Tell me what you want" You pleaded and he shook his head, looking away from you before he lost all composure.

"Mierda..you know i can't chiquita..you're too young for me..I'm your boss, there is so fucking much wrong with just this conversation." He scolded, his voice raspy, accent thick.

"I don't care. Just act, stop hiding yourself from me" You whined slightly, looking up at him with those eyes he fell for. He groaned, removing his hands from your grip, taking your cheeks in his grasp and ducking his head down to smash his lips against yours, fuck was he breaking his morals. He felt so guilty but the feeling of your lips on his felt so good. You didn't have a twinge of guilt, finally feeling the relief you needed, the dim lights of your office the perfect lighting for a kiss.

As his lips molded to yours, your mouth opened, tongues touching in perfect bliss, a low grunt rumbling from him, vibrating against your lips. His hands fell into your hair, keeping you as close as possible as your hands found their way to his shoulders, palms spreading over the blades, not able to reach around his neck. He gently sucked on your bottom lip before pulling back, the kiss being so deep a string a saliva connected the both of you for a split second, his face inches away as he breathed out, although you found yourself breathless.

"Well, your an amazing kisser" You breathed out nervously, hands gripping at the 'fabric' of his suit, his eyes softened and he hummed.

"So are you.." His hand stroked your cheek, thumb brushing over your skin "I can't do this princesa, i won't let myself do this to you" He shook his head, pressing his kiss to yours for a split second before pulling back, removing your hands from his shoulders.

"No Miguel, please, I wan't this, your the only one that doesn't"

"Mi vida..i wan't this, i wan't this bad, so very bad, believe me i do. But I'm dismissive and confusing, I'll hurt you, I know I will" He was so conflicted, like he didn't want to leave, nor was he going to, but he couldn't do anything because something unconsciously told him not to. You frowned, pulling him down to your level by his shoulders, cupping his cheek "I don't care Miguel, you won't hurt me, I won't let you"

"You're young and naive, you don't understand, i wan't to give you everything, it's so hard to resist you, but i'll ruin you, little one" His face was distressed, apart from his soft, swollen lips. The nickname made you suck in a breath and you bit down on your lip before shaking your head "So? ruin me" You teased.

He groaned in anticipation, the noise sounding whinier than before, as if he was losing the battle in his head, you knew you were breaking him down bit by bit. You both held eye contact for a moment as he seemed to think.

"For fucks sake" He growled, hands grasping your waist and pulling you in for another kiss, this time less loving and more needy, the feeling going straight to your core. His fingertips dug into your side, a moan erupting from you at the feeling, already so desperate. He pulled away and hooked his fingers under the hem of your dress "You don't take no for an answer, do you?" He snarled, looking into your eyes with his dark ones. With a smirk and giggle, you shook your head. He removed his fingers from your dress and slipped his hands to the back of your thighs, suddenly lifting you.

Your legs wrapped around his waist as he pushed you gently into the wall, his hand snaking all over your thigh, gripping at the plush, eyes staring down at your legs that squeezed him in. His eyes seemed to flutter, humming out a quiet moan as he played with you, before looking at you. "You act so innocent, but strut around showing off everything you can..you tease me all the time, do you know how hard it was to not take you right on my desk countless times, fuck just seeing you sit down earlier, it's like your trying to get me to fuck you" He declared, voice patronising.

"I am, everyday" You purred, not able to stop the grin on your face a he looks at you, shaking his head as if telling you off "So deceiving..hope you don't act like that with the others" he tutted.

"Just you, Miggy" You hummed, finally able to reach him, arms wrapping around his neck, fingers finding his hair, twirling it around your fingertips. "Good girl" The corner of his lips curved into a small smirk, there it was, the thing that kept you up all night and he was saying it again, this time the exact way you wanted. He averted his view back to your thighs, pushing your dress up to your hips agonizingly slow, fingers dragging over your skin, admiring the lace black panties you wore underneath.

"Fuck..tan jodidamente hermoso" (t: so fucking pretty) His fingers brushed over the material, your breath hitching as he grew closer and closer to where you needed him. "You sure you want this, you can't take it back once its happened mi amor" He looked at you through his lashes and you eagerly nodded, panting lightly. He then pushed your panties to the side, the thin material being no trouble to him as he stared at you, a shaky breath leaving him, his thumb lightly touching your clit. Whining just slightly, you bucked your hips in reaction, so desperate.

He snickered and pulled back his hands, holding you up with just his hips as he pressed some buttons on his watch, his suit literally disappearing, the sight making you gasp. "Tech" He shrugged before leaning down to kiss and nip at your neck, fang dragging over your throat, quiet moans filling his ears as he did so. He suddenly lifted one of his hands to our face "Spit into my hand” he mumbled into the skin of your neck, sucking lightly, marking you as his own.

A little confused, you cautiously spat, trying not to make too much noise from just his kisses, his hand fell back down between your legs, he stroked his cock with his now wet hand, dragging his hand up and down until he felt he was ready for you. The sight sinful and something you would think about for weeks. You could feel the vibrations of his noises against your neck as he dragged his tip along your folds, covering himself in your slick, the feeling making you even more needy. He pulled back from your neck, admiring his work before looking down at where your bodies touched, his hand grasping the base of his cock, lining himself up with your hole.

"You ready baby?" He asked and you nodded, hands tightening on his hair. He slowly pushed into you, the stretch insane, you could feel him twitch inside, you whimpered, eyes squeezing shut and he attached his mouth to yours, hoping to distract you as he fully bottomed out into you. Both of you moaned into the open-mouthed kiss, your fingertips tugged at the short hairs at the base of his neck

He began to slowly pull out of you before fully bottoming out again, hips meeting as he repeated the action, each time, your body bounced against the wall from the contact. The kiss grew sloppy as his movements sped up and you pulled back to dip your head into the crook of his neck, whining out at the amazing feeling of him hitting your g-spot repeatedly with each thrust.

"There? That the spot princesa?" he breathed out, his hand pressing against the wall for stability as the other squeezed your thigh desperately, his cock destroying you in the best way possible. You nodded, muttering out incoherent words into his collarbone, he realized how cockdrunk you were and couldn't help but grow slightly vain, the sound of you babbling and moaning going straight to his dick.

Your hands slid down his shoulders growing limp and landing on his mid back, nails digging into the skin, scratching slightly. "Feels s'good Miguel.." You rambled and he groaned "Yeah? Fuck, you feel fucking amazing baby" He fucked into you, noticing the way your walls began to squeeze him and hips began to rock to meet his.

You felt your orgasm going near, lower stomach tightening as you sputtered out curse words, he made sure to fuck you especially well as he panted out "can i cum inside?" His thrusts getting inconsistent and out of tempo. You nodded quickly "y-yeah, please, want it" You pierced his back with your nails.

Your ankles crossed around his waist, locking his body as close to you as possible and he pushed into you for the final time, his hand reaching to rub at your clit as he spilled his load into you, body shaking as you came at the feeling of it. For a moment you both stay, breathing heavily in silence before he carefully pulls back from you, straightening out your underwear after he was no longer inside you. He placed you on your desk, still between your legs, gingerly pressing a kiss to your neck before stepping back, causing you to whine at the loss of contact.

"I know, i know cariño..I'm not leaving" He reassured, pulling your skirt back down to your mid thigh, thumb then brushing over your marked neck. "You fucked up my back, mi corazon" He huffs, turning slightly to show you your damage, you could see the various white above skin cuts covering his back along with a few actual cuts, a small amount of blood decorating his muscles.

"Sorry, Miggy" You smiled, chuckling lightly at yourself. He looked at you, smiling a little "Your laughing? at my pain?"

"Nono!-" "I'm kidding, it felt fucking great doll" He pressed a kiss to your lips, rubbing at your thighs before pressing at his watch and appearing fully suited up again, aside from his face. "Now, im actually behind on work, so I need to catch up, but don't be stranger, you know my apartment number chiquita"

Then he left, disappointed in his lack of composure and self respect for sleeping with someone so young but also unbothered because he was madly in love with you. He couldn’t wait to see you again.

---

I know there is so many spelling mistakes so i deeply apologize, i wrote this quite quick. I'm happy to write a part two if anyone's interested angels ;))

Pet name translations:

Princesa-Princess, Dulzura-Sweetness, Muñeca-doll, Angelito- little angel, Mi Vida - My life, Mi corazon- my heart, Chiquita - little one/girl (duh)

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quoththemaiden · 8 months ago

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The final chapter of @mrghostrat's Big Name Feelings Good Omens AU is dropping tomorrow, so obviously there was no way I could resist writing another fanscene. (Previous scene 1, 2, 3) Inspired by the sheer domesticity of chapters 15 and 16, enjoy this end-of-series scene.

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Crowley's key fumbled against the lock — still Aziraphale's lock, technically, but very firmly Crowley's key. "Dinner was good, though?"

Aziraphale rolled his eyes a little at how much more attention his face was getting than the keyhole. Sherlock Holmes might have blamed the wine they shared at dinner for the scratches around the lock, but Aziraphale knew better. "It was delicious, of course. You should know; you were there."

"Nnyeah, well, it's your opinion I care about." As if that weren't obvious from Crowley having gotten them a table at one of the city's best restaurants on Valentine's Day and insisting on not even letting him see the bill.

As if Aziraphale was ever any good at hiding his appreciation of good food.

"Quite sure," Aziraphale replied with a gentle touch on Crowley's arm that swiftly turned into snagging the key from him to open the door himself. Crowley let out a huffy laugh as he followed him inside. "Tea?"

"Sure, if that goes with whatever we're doing next." Crowley had been trying to wheedle Aziraphale's planned gift out of him for the past two weeks, and Aziraphale had remained utterly firm in not sharing it with him. Crowley insisted that whatever Aziraphale planned would be alright with him so there was no reason for Aziraphale to be shy about it, and Aziraphale had said "I know, dearest," and somehow that's as far as Crowley's attempts at learning Aziraphale's plans ever got.

Aziraphale fussed around with the tea and put on some music — old-fashioned stuff on actual CDs, the sap — and Crowley was left to lean against the doorjamb watching him and coming to terms with being so terribly, completely besotted that their evening plans could be "absolutely nothing" and Crowley wouldn't love it a single speck less. Aziraphale had said that he'd always thought of Valentine's Day as just another day, and that he'd certainly never considered that he might be able to celebrate it publicly, so Crowley was already delighted at having coaxed him out to dinner. Crowley found himself very suddenly aware that if Aziraphale's supposed plans amounted to nothing at all, he honestly wouldn't mind. His fifteen-year-old self would eat him alive if he knew, and Crowley felt warm inside to know that that was his younger self's loss.

Crowley blinked out of his reverie in time to help Aziraphale carry the teacups into the living room, and was almost surprised when Aziraphale brought a bag in with him as he followed. "Whazzat?"

"Painting supplies, dear." Aziraphale set the bag down on the coffee table.

Another point in favor of another evening spent doing nothing unusual. Crowley relaxed back into the couch, wondering if his melting heart could leave stains on the fabric. "What're you gonna paint?"

"You!" Par for the course again, then. Aziraphale gave a happy wriggle. "I hope you aren't ticklish!"

Wait, what?

"Uh?" Crowley picked up one of the paints Aziraphale was setting out and found that the label said, quite clearly, "body safe." "Angel?"

Aziraphale looked at him with a smile that said he was still 100% confident in his plan despite Crowley's confusion. "I thought it might be a nice reminder of the con. Getting an airbrush and making stencils didn't seem sensible, really, but I know how to use a brush well enough."

Crowley let out a breathy laugh. "'Well enough' 's an understatement. Geez, now MY gift feels—"

"—completely, perfectly tailored to me," Aziraphale cut in. "I would have been actually cross if you'd insisted on getting me another sword." Crowley laughed again, and it warmed Aziraphale's heart that he'd seemed to do nothing but laugh all night. Aziraphale patted Crowley's hand before picking up his tea, taking an appreciative sip and willing it to calm the excited fluttering in his chest. "What do you think? Another serpent on your cheek? I was thinking a tree would look rather lovely spread across your spine and shoulder blades..."

Crowley shivered a little at that, easily able to picture Aziraphale straddling his hips as he lay on the bed, Aziraphale's left palm spread flat on his back to keep himself steady with the rise and falls of Crowley's breath, his paintbrush tenderly tracing a line along his spine...

"Snake first," he agreed quickly. "And then..." He looked down on Aziraphale's arms and swallowed. "Think you could paint on your own arm? I could help hold things steady for you."

"Oh," Aziraphale breathed, and Crowley's heart clenched in the best of ways. He had no idea how Aziraphale always managed to say that like he was falling in love all over again, time and time again, but he did.

No, that wasn't quite right. Crowley probably did know. He suspected it came from the same place as the way he'd looked at Aziraphale as he helped him out of the car today. Aziraphale had taken his arm without hesitation and looked up at him with a warmer smile than any mortal had ever earned, and Crowley had been certain he was wearing his own heart on his sleeve, his vest, and every other garment he owned.

He adored him, and somehow, ineffably, it was the smallest moments that made it stand out the most.

"...right," Aziraphale managed to say around the happy tightness in his throat. "Some art for the both of us, then."

#good omens #good omens fanfiction #ineffable husbands #bnf au #fanfiction of fanfiction #my writing #absolutely amazing fic bilvy #you should be proud!!

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ungodlysaltyinfrastructure · 1 month ago

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Hey… so uh… Alux witnessing his mother die in front of him, anyone?

Aha. So um. I inexplicably went missing on tumblr...

Why? I tried deleting an experimental side blog I didn't need/want, and because I don't know how tumblr works, I had actually deleted my main account (Note to self, never venture off into the account settings, WITHOUT CHECKING WHICH BLOG IM ON) I was devastated about it, but, it may have been a good thing for me, question mark? I had been embroiled in toxic queer discourse (aphobia sucks), and it took a toll on my mental well-being. So I took this unfortunate deletion of my work as a sign to relax a bit, despite the pit of panic that formed when this happened. Luckily, I'm better! (again >_>) and I still love Alux Rising, so here I am, making my grand return! back at it again with more way too long character analysis!

I would've posted about my abrupt leaving of tumblr sooner as I was eager to explain everything, but then AR 14 dropped soooooooooooo

Okay. Ar 14. Just made me incredibly happy. A major thing that had been missing for me was actual depictions of Alux as a child. He goes on about how his childhood was rough, but we never actually got to see such. Only the aftermath of such childhood with his relationship to Elric.

Now that we've seen it,

Oh God. It explains, a lot. I always thought Alux acted weird, so much so that I started to theorize that he was *actually* autistic/ASD (More Asperger's Syndrome but that term is no longer used)

But now…

I still hold firm in my Autistic Aro Alux Headcanon, but now his “lack of character” makes more sense to me.

It's made out that Alux's lack of character was prominent in his childhood, as his mother says that one day, he'll learn to like whatever he likes, and he'll be his own person, inferring that he doesn't understand that yet as a child. That's really intriguing to me. Apparently, his blandness was apparent in his childhood, and now in his adulthood. And it seems that the only thing he fully knows how to do, is to help people. If this lack of uniqueness to his character was in his childhood, then maybe the fact that Alux is bland is a defining character trait for him. One that will be overridden by this developing story of Alux rising. (Aha! Character development!)

Now, in relation to Alux and his parents.

It seems like he followed his mom more than his dad. That's why he brings her up in his and Elric's argument, and why he says “I like what you like!” and “I want to be just like you” To her in the memory.

And upon further rewatching, my heart just broke.

In the memory, Alux's mom says “But remember to be the best version of yourself, and to treat others how you want to be treated.”

How does Alux treat others currently? *He constantly helps them. protecting them, making sure they're OK.*

*sigh*...

Ok.

I'm really glad that we got this flash back. It actually helps put some character into Alux (even if it being trauma) and his lack of reaction to a lot of things makes much more sense. Even after the whole flashback, his lack of talking about the memory for why he had such a strong reaction feels very realistic considering the circumstances.

Another thing I realized, when Alux snaps out of it, the surrounding magic of green crystals is the orchids. I'm crying.

It most definitely seems like witnessing his mother's death stunted Alux's mental development to a degree, mostly in the sense that he doesn't fully know who he is, what he wants, or what he likes with what seemed to be his only supporting figure in his life now gone. If he still had his mother, maybe he would've turned out differently. (Wow shocker, I know.)

And honestly, we all knew Alux was traumatized, but I did not expect it to be to THIS extent. I just thought his mom died of an illness, and he wasn't there to see it but she was gone.

I was. SO WRONG.

Dead wrong. One could say.

Like Alux's mom- *cough*

anyways- yea Alux's nickname should definitely be Horny, Professor Red- oops, sorry *GEARS* comes up with the best nicknames, in fact he should become president and deliver every presidential speech in his rhyming scheme.

Oh and James is not dead,

Apparently.

#alux rising #favremysabre #ar alux #sorry for going missing #life likes to flip itself over your head #and then you don't know what to do #BUT #I'm back #😎#a series of unfortunate events happened and im here to rectifiy it #anyways ar dropped and im here to make art lets all rejoice and celebrate🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

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p3ndeja6 · 1 year ago

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Kyle b. x Latina! y/n

AGED UP

SUMMARY: kyle was good at every subject, algebra to physics; but there was one class he cannot seem to be good at, no matter how much he stayed after school or missed lunch to study. Spanish was just really hard for him. You on the other hand we’re fluent, born and raised. So Spanish was very easy for you.

warnings: smut! teasing, public sex, handjobs, praising!, degradation! (if you squint perhaps, idk lemme know), dirty talking! sub! kyle? dom! y/n?

(not proof read,, my bad)

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“dude you are really failing Spanish?” Stan questioned, “yeah dude, i don’t know what is wrong with me, I’m good at everything!” Kyle said frustrated. Kyle was worried about his grade in Spanish and it didn’t help that midterm report cards are coming in the mail tomorrow. “Dude what am I going to do!, I cannot fail Spanish and it shows on transcript” Stan and the rest of the boys were thinking. Until butters popped out of nowhere saying, “you can ask y/n! She has an A in Spanish and she’s Latina” he said wiggling his eyebrows.

Y/n… Kyle thought, he did notice you in his 8th Spanish period. He always thought you were cute and funny as well. He blushed on the thought on asking you for tutoring… usually he is the tutor. “Yeah dude, ask y/n she can really help you” Stan agreed. “I don’t know dude, do you think she would want to?” “Are you a fucking idiot? kyel I’m even smarter then that” cartman finally joined the conversation after eating his big ass BLT with just the B. Kyle couldn’t even talk back because he was right, just ask her for help. ‘I need at least a B+ in this upcoming test, fine I’ll ask her later today”

Kyle all day was wondering how would he approach you, ‘ hey can you tutor me?’ no no.. ‘uh hey ! is it cool if you can tutor me?’ nope ‘yo! tutor me’ god no!

8th period rolled around and he entered Ms. Vazquez class, he searched the room for your bright presence. He saw you in the back talking to Wendy, laughing and being pretty. He started walking back to you, “uh hey.. y/n can I ask you something?” “uhh.. yeah sure what’s up Kyle?” He was nervous, why was he nervous around you? “I wanted to ask you if you can tutor me on Spanish? It’s just I’m failing and you’re the only one I know who’s good at spanish and at teaching. So if you wouldn’t mind, I could pay you if you want-” “kyle!” He looked at you shocked “it’s okay! I’ll tutor you. Don’t worry about paying me” you said all sweet

“o-okay! um do you want to meet in the library?” “Yeah sure, If you get there before me pick the table in the back by the window!” “alright-” “atención niños, ya sonó el timbre por favor busquen sus asientos!” Ms. Vazquez exclaimed and class has already started

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kyle hurried to the library, ready to learn. He brought his notes, highlighters and laptop, he was determined to get an A on this test for Spanish. He sat in the table you clearly instructed him to sit at earlier today. He waited there patiently for your arrival. kids were leaving the building and buses were starting to leave. He heard the door open and there you were with your pink backpack holding your keys and your metal water bottle together making them clank around the quiet library. “ahh! There you are, this was exactly the table I was talking about, such a good listener!” She said. The way y/n said it made Kyle shiver a bit.

“okay Kyle let’s start on the last worksheet señorita Vazquez gave us” “oh yeah worksheet 3.5, I have that one!” “Great let’s start on that one to see how much help you need… okay so you basically need to fill in the blanks on the correct Spanish term, the first one is El supermercado esta or estas muy lejos?” “uhh estas?” “no kyle eso no fue correcto, that was not correct” you said now getting visibly closer. “Cmon kyle I know you know this” you said seductively. Your hand now reached his thigh, softly massaging it closer to his crotch. His breath hitched, he started to breath rapidly. Twitching in your touch.

“uhh I- I- I think it’s.. esta?” He stuttered, “si! muy bien!, such a good boy Kyle” you whispered the last part “did you know good boys get rewarded?” You were now softly clutching his dick, feeling it get harder in his tight pants. Kyle started to whimper in your touch. “Next one Kyle, el jarrón está or estaba lleno de agua?” kyle was trying so hard to concentrate on the question, you started to unzip his pants and put your hand on top of his clothed dick, feeling it get big and twitch in your hands. Giving the clothed tip a slight squeeze. “Cmon mi vida, what’s the answer?” You teased him. “Uhh it’s esta” he kept losing focus but if he answered correctly you’d give his cock the attention he desperately wanted. “You’re such a smart boy” you kept rubbing on his now sensitive dick, you finally took him out of his suffocating boxers. Making his hard cock spring up, all red and precum leaking from the cherry red tip. “Now be a good boy for me Kyle and don’t make any noise, because we do not want to get caught.. do we?” You teased, kyle was shaking over how overstimulated he was being, all he did was nod because if he opened his mouth, loud moans and whimpers would escape. “ah uh I need you to use your words querida” using Spanish pet names were really getting him all riled up, all he could muster up was “y-yes” “okay! next question” he looked at you confused and frustrated, “what? I’m here to tutor you Kyle” you smiled innocently leaning over the table on your elbow and now started to stroke Kyle’s big dick

“en el cielo se puede/puedo ver júpiter desde aquí?” you started to increase the stroking speed a bit, he couldn’t focus all he could focus on was the pleasure he was receiving, “kyle what’s the answer?” you started to slow down again, he noticed the slowed friction, “it’s uh puedo” “no that’s incorrect” you took your hand off his dick. “no! please- more- please” he begged in such a slutty matter, your pussy started to throb and soak over his sweet whimpers you caused him,rubbing your legs together trying to ease the the throb in your panties. “you didn’t get it correct, so I’m not going to touch you until you get this next one correct” kyle whimpered, trying to focus on the questions “this one is now different, en que año se independizo finalmente mexico?, I hope you know dates” he knew this one, it was so easy. “1821!” You started stroking him again, “good! Such a smart boy, how would my smart boy like to get rewarded?” You stroked him painfully slow “y-yes please- please touch me” he embarrassingly said. you loved the way you powered over him and complied for his request “ok mi niño, I’ll touch you, only because you’ve been so good for me” You started to stroke his hard cock, rubbing the tip to get him even more harder then what he already is.

Kyle started grilling the table trying so hard not to make any noise, “you like that huh? All tense over my soft hand on your beautiful cock” “what I would do to have your dick in my pretty ,small mouth” you seductively said in his ear. He let one moan escape over the way you’re talking to him. “f-fuck y/n please-” I want you to ask me in Spanish” his brain is all mush “por favor y/n dame mas” “que lindo te vez asi, hecho bolas en mis manos” you pumped him faster, squeezing his tight balls. you felt his dick twitch, you knew he was about to cum. “Y/n I’m about to cum-" “yeah? I want you to cum, fill my hands with your babies” that did it for him, he bite his lip so hard trying not to make any noise, tasting the copper from all the bitting he has been doing. He leaned his head back; feeling the sweat beads and his curly hair stick to his forehead, softly swearing profanities under his breath. “I’m cumming!” He softly spoke, kyle let his load off on your pretty manicured hands. “Fuck baby, had all that cum in there for me huh?” Kyle was too fucked out, head fell on the table trying to catch his breath. He started feeling light-headed, you licked off majority of his cum off your hands, wiping the rest with a make-up remover you had in your backpack.

“I think you will pass the Spanish test, pretty good at it. Don’t know why you’re failing” you teased while collecting your things. You got up and bent behind Kyle. “Next time let’s study in my room, we can do more than handjobs.” You butterfly kissed his neck, kyle leaning to give you access. You giggled and stood straight. “I’ll see you later Kyle”

You left Kyle still strung out on his orgasm he just had in the public library. You walked to the other isle and saw Bebe and Wendy with wide eyes. “that’s how you do it, see you later cabronas” you laughed off to go jerk off to kyles moans you had forever engraved in your brain.

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#smut #x reader #south park #latina #kyle brovlofski #south park kyle #south park x reader #kyle broflovski x reader #x y/n #stan marsh #south park cartman #wendy testaburger #bebe stevens #south park smut #mexican #kyle broflovski #kyle x reader #kyle sub #kyle

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