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luciaramosc · 8 months

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⁎⁺˳✧༚ enchanted

pairing: carmen ‘carmy’ berzatto x afab!reader

warnings: fluff, kissing, swearing, insinuated bath time, nothing graphic

word count: 1.8k words

an: i wrote this in the trenches (waiting to be seen at urgent care) so please excuse any typos 🙈 currently gnawing at the bars of my enclosure because i’ve been sick all week, but the delulu is as strong as ever!

Carmen’s head hung low in his hands, his elbows resting on the battered desk as the knot in his shoulders weighed against him. His mind itched to grab the pack of cigarettes in his pocket, but the exhaustion seeped through his veins too heavily to even bother. His ears were entranced by the rhythmic tick…tick…tick… of the clock above the office door, but the new-found quiet had been welcomed after a day of yelling and dishing. He moved his head to rest on his palm, and his tranquil eyes struggled to flutter open. With his other hand, he began to scribble nonsense for orders that he hoped he could translate tomorrow morning, but he knew his attempts were becoming futile when he wrote “10 pd skt stk,” meaning to write “10 pounds skirt steak.”

In the midst of his battle with sleep deprivation, Carmen hadn’t even noticed the string of texts you sent his way. It was nearing 12:30am, and you had just left the bar you worked at when you pulled your phone out and invited him to your apartment for the night.

Carmy :)

12:27

Hey bub! I just got off of work and I’m heading home

Sleepover? My bed’s cold without you :(

12:31

I have a bottle of your favorite wine if that convinces you ;)

12:38

Carmyyy

Are you still at The Bear?

Okay I’m calling you

Carmen’s head slipped off his palm and lulled him awake, and his bleary eyes fought against the bright light of his desk lamp. He heard the constant buzzing of his phone, and surmised that it had to have been you calling him. His decorated hands rubbed his eyes before he shuffled papers and folders around to find his cell, but to no avail. As he heard the buzz come to an end, he huffed out a breath, and he ceased his search. Instantly, however, his phone began to shake again, and a smile graced his face at the thought of his girl missing him that much. After pushing a few more unnecessary items off the desk, he found his found phone with a picture of you illuminating his screen. He swiped his thumb to answer the call, and he pushed his phone to his ear, desperate to hear your voice.

“Baby? You okay?” you asked once Carmen picked up. Delighted, his lips curled up into a smile.

“Hey princess, I’m alright. Just got caught up with papers and shit,” he rasped out, sleepiness laced in his voice. “I’m wrapping up here though. What’s up?”

“I just wanted to see if you wanted to come over tonight,” you hummed into the line. “We haven’t seen each other much this week, and I know for a fact you haven’t slept well.” You giggled softly as she uttered the truth.

Carmen cracked a chuckle at her words, knowing that she wasn’t wrong. “Yeah, sweetheart, no need to rub it in,” he muttered in a half-dazed state. “But yeah, gimme like,” he peered down at his watch, reading 12:40, “20 minutes and I’ll be there. Is that okay, honey?”

You opened the door of your apartment, closing it behind you before locking it as you cradled your phone between your ear and shoulder. “Yeah, absolutely,” you told him as you set your bag down. “I can pop some cookies in the oven in the meantime? Unless that’s out of your league, chef,” you teased him. He could hear the smirk in your tone as you joked about the cookies.

“Haha, very funny, baby. Gonna hit me with anything else?” he asked her.

“Not right now, no,” a smile cracked at her lips. “It’s not my fault you decided to date a comedian. ‘Can’t take the flame, don’t get in the kitchen,’ or whatever nonsense you guys say.”

“Alright, not too much,” he chuckled out, the sound vibrating deep in his chest. “I’ll see you in a few, alright sweetheart?”

She bit her lip in thought before closing out the call. “See you in a few. I love you, Carmy.”

“I love you more,” Carmen said before hanging up the call. He put his phone into his pocket before running a calloused hand through his curls. His drowsy eyes scanned the room briefly, wondering where to start, before picking up the mistrewn papers and folders off the office floor. He set them in a neat (ish) pile on the desk before standing up from the rickety chair. He stepped out of the office, taking one more peek of the kitchen and dining room to ensure they looked the same as they were when The Bear closed (They were, Carmen’s just paranoid). Not soon enough, Carmen punched his work card for the night and took the keys out from his pocket, turning them in the door and locking up for the night.

As Carmen made his way back to his place to get an overnight bag, you had occupied yourself with prepping for your boyfriend’s stay. You dressed up your apartment with candles, put your speaker to play smooth jazz, and set up your bathroom with elements for a well-deserved bath for both you and Carmen. You knew that things with the Bear had been picking up for him, and while you could not have been happier for him, you knew that it took a toll on his well-being, so you were thrilled that he agreed to spend the night and relax for a moment.

Within a few minutes, the oven chimed and you got to taking the cookies out the oven, the rich smell of cinnamon and vanilla filling the apartment. You put on some oven mitts and right as you slid the hot trays onto the counter, the doorbell rang, letting you know that Carmen had made it safely to your door. “Just a second!” You called out, taking the gloves off and letting your hair out of its updo. You sauntered over to the door, and you’re met with Carmy holding a bouquet in his hands, the arranged pinks and oranges capturing your attention. “Hey sweetheart, sorry for the late hour,” he uttered, motioning the arrangements towards you. “I brought these ‘cause they reminded me of you,” he admitted with a lovesick grin on his lips as you grabbed the bouquet.

You peered down at the flowers in your hands before looking up at him, staring into his soft eyes, evidence of exhaustion painting his features. “Carmy, you shouldn’t have,” a soft pout puckered at your lips, tears swelling in your waterline. “This is so sweet, thank you bub.” You smiled up at him before pulling him inside, saving him from the coolness of the night. You closed the door behind him as he pulled your frame towards him, one hand resting on the plush of your hip as he pressed a sweet peck on your lips. “Carmy, it’s 1am, where the hell did you get these from?” you giggled out, confused, though appreciative of his gift.

“I meant to stop by earlier during my lunch break to drop them off,” he began, rubbing the back of neck sheepishly, “but shit hit the fan, and I got caught at work.”

“Well, I love them either way. Thank you, bub,” you assured him with a smile, pressing a kiss on his cheek. “Let me take your bag to my room. Eat a cookie or two, please. I know you’ve barely eaten today, chef,” she playfully demanded. You grabbed the duffel from his hands before heading towards your bedroom, delicately leaving the bouquet on the kitchen table to set up later.

You dropped the duffel bag off at the foot of your shared bed before joining him in the kitchen, watching Carmen take down two cookies in three bites. “Good for supermarket cookies, huh?” you teased him, poking his bicep. He shook his head playfully before looking at you, adoration pooling in his eyes with a smile to match. “Good for supermarket cookie,” he repeated. You grabbed one of the cookies off the tray, still slightly warm, and took a bite, savoring the taste after a long night at work. You made yourself a mental note to buy more of these christmas tree cookies before the holidays ended.

After finishing your last bite, you made your way to the sink, grabbing a vase and filling it with water for your flowers. You grabbed the bouquet off the table and began to cut the ends at an angle, taking in the scent of the tulips Carmen brought you. As you were getting lost in a rhythm, Carmen came up behind you, wrapping his arms around your frame and resting his head on your shoulder. He pressed soft kisses down your neck, trailing down to your shoulder, effectively distracting you from your work. “You could be a florist, ya know. You’ve got gentle hands and a good eye for stuff like this,” his accent hummed out in your ear.

It was your turn to softly chuckle at his words, feeling the way his hands trailed down to hold the plush of your waist and how the feel of his fingertips on your skin felt blissful. “Oh, I’m sure, Carmy,” you quipped out, taking your lip between your teeth as you moved the flowers into the watered vase. Once you were done, you moved the arrangement from the sink to the kitchen table, setting it next to the candles you lit earlier.

Carmen trailed behind you out the kitchen, resting a gentle hand on the small of your back. You stepped back into the living room and sought solace in the warm arms of your lover, his strong arms holding you flush against his frame. The two of you rocked back and forth in a gentle rhythm to the soft beats playing, simply in awe of this sweet little life you’ve been able to create. You and Carmen created a perfect harmony out of the asyncopated clutter in both your lives, but you wouldn’t mind another thing on your plate as long as it meant coming back into Carmen’s arms every night.

One of his hands rested on the warmth of your waist while the other trailed up to hold your chin, bringing your lips to meet his in a domestic buzz, sharing sweet kisses in the candlelight. You broke apart and rested your forehead against his shoulder, swaying in the lovestruck air. “I set the bathroom up if you want to take a hot bath later. I got those salts you like to put in the water that help with your muscles. How does that sound?” You whispered out, gently playing with his curls. “God, you’re so good to me,” he playfully groaned out. You placed one last peck on his lips, cradling his cheek in your hands as a smirk adorned your features. “Sounds like a plan to me, then.”

#carmen berzatto #carmy berzatto #carmen berzatto x reader #carmy berzatto x reader #the bear #the bear hulu #carmen berzatto fluff #carmy berzatto fluff #carmen x reader

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acroagoraphobe · 4 months

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Headcannons for living with Joshua Graham mordern AU?

Oooo.. I already have agood few so ima put em all together!

And a good few new ones too!

Ungodly amount of decorative pillows in his house, all over the couches, on the beds.

Its literally the worst, All the beds have uncomfy decorative comforters.

He doesn't really get out of the house except for church, so he just sits in his room reading most of the time.

Probably goes to book club on the weekends with the church ladies though.

Lots and lots of potted plants. So many potted plants. inside and outside the house.

Does not cook. Since even in a modern AU.. bad history with fires (His last house got burnt down at the last legion cookout.) So you have to cook for him.

He also doesn't have a microwave because he doesn't trust them.

Divorced Dad. Need I say more?

Sits on the porch reading when not at book club, church, or in his room. Sometimes he stares menacingly at passerby.

Pet Gecko he keeps in his room in a gecko tank? enclosure? whatever the hell you call the lizard storage.

You will probably hear him complain passive agressively that the dishes aren't done, yet he also doesn't do them.

Laundry though, that shit is done, dried, ironed, and folded perfectly and put up. As much as he complains about doing laundry he sure likes doing it.

there's so many crosses hung up in his house. (Reminds me of that one thing where a guy's grandma hung up a foam Minecraft sword because she thought it was a cross.)

The king of horrendous, Live laugh love things. Utensil holder, front door sign. DOORMAT.

Will constantly complain about people in the park Larping if he ever does go outside and be grumpy in the park (He used to be a larper, he's just a bitchy old man)

Can't work a computer to save his life. Somehow gets it to blue screen by opening a single tab in google. Do not let him near your computer.

He has a flip phone. No you cannot argue this. And he leaves it in the worst places and he has like the worst ringtone option possible. It's so annoying. Dear god is it annoying.

This man does not own a single pair of non-cargo shorts, or sweatpants. it's either formal or 80's dad. Yes he wears Newbalances.

The wallpaper in his house is like all like floral print and its super ugly but Joshua genuinely really likes it so you don't wanna point it out that it's ugly as fuck. But he knows deep down that its absolutely hideous snd refuses to acknowledge it like how he refuses to acknowledge his mistakes and when he's wrong in an argument and then just silently sits there and says nothing angrily.

The most inconvenient locks are broken. bathroom lock? broken when he bought the house. Bedroom lock? Broke because he slammed the door too hard and then it didn't latch and he slammed it again over snd over and he got more pissed at the door so he punched it really hard.

He gets realllyyyy pissy sometimes. Like i mean hella pissy. Like for no reason either. best to leave him to his own devices.

Just does random lore drops like "I used to be on a bowling team. and once almost killed a man with a bowling ball." then walks off back to his room.

#I KNOW A LOT OF THESE SOUND LIKE IVE EXPERIENCED THEM PERSONALLY BUT I HAVEN'T. IM JUST GOOD AT MAKJNG THINGS SOUND SPECIFIC AND PERSONAL.#//#fallout #fallout new vegas #fallout nv #fnv #joshua graham #honest hearts #ace rambles #ask

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interpolanticssuperfan · 1 year

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nothing natural | ken x fem!reader | part 1 | 18+ only

warnings: this will eventually contain smut so please be mindful. part of my goal is to explore ken developing a relationship with a human who struggles with their own vices, and doesn't feel qualified to teach him how to be human. i'd consider this slow burn with obviously eventual relationship fluff and smut (this includes ken doing things like drinking alcohol for the first time, having sexual experiences for the first time, etc.) not sure how many parts this will be but i will keep everyone updated!

also - my main is @snuffbby i just didnt feel comfortable posting it there, but you can follow me there if you want to chat or ask questions about this ongoing work. thanks <3 <3

Meeting Ken was actually a complete and unforeseen fluke – not on your part, it’s not like you were looking for him.

Frankly, you weren’t looking for anything at this point in your life. Burnt out, at the end of your rope with men and content to enjoy your own company in the comfort of your apartment, happy to work your menial clerical job for the rest of your life until a better paying career fell into your lap.

Or whatever.

You didn’t really care. As odd as it sounded, you were thankful right now for boring. For humdrum chores, for cleaning the kitchen and brainlessly answering emails for eight hours a day until your joints ached.

Having been out of college for four years now, you’d put in a decent tenure at your current company doing data entry. It wasn’t challenging and afforded you plenty of freedom in your schedule. That being said, most days were seamless copies of one another – wake up, feed your guinea pig, stretch on the tiny sliver of patio out front, then head to the library down the road to work until your eyes crossed from screen fatigue.

Nothing really ever changed. Yogurt for breakfast every morning. Repeated motions of the only three yoga poses you knew. Even your guinea pig seemed to look at you with confusion sometimes when you fed her, tiny eyes ogling up at you from her spacious enclosure.

“Don’t look at me like that,” you’d mutter, dropping in romaine lettuce and pellets for her. And after every complaint, she would twirl in a circle, waiting for her daily brushing.

The library was a godsend on these hot summer days, air conditioned and quiet. You didn’t even need headphones, but preferred them to focus. The secretary stopped asking if she could help you find anything when she realized you’d become a regular patron of the modern looking white table near the massive windows.

“Good morning, Pat,” you’d smile as you passed, and she’d give you a little wave, usually on the phone with someone or engrossed in a book of her own.

Updating spreadsheets. Notifying supervisors of progress. Nearly nodding off at eleven thirty. It had been shaping up to be an entirely normal, predictable, cut and dry day. Until a silhouette by the front desk grew bigger, approaching your peripheral and then flat out startling you. Numbers and figures had started to blur together, so you blinked hard and shut your laptop – just to find an incredibly curious sight across from you.

Sat comfortable and cross-legged in the opposing chair was one of, if not the most objectively attractive men you’d ever seen in your entire life. Pretty in a way that bordered on unnatural, like a living sculpture. A long, denim-clad arm splayed out lazily along the back of the chair.

This man gave you a calculated yet warm smirk that danced across his features. Bleached blonde like a model and face angled, glazed in sunlight that inched through the windows. He was something straight out of a fairytale – picturesque, almost glowing.

Where had he come from?

“Is this seat taken?” Inexplicably you felt the back of your neck heating up, a ring of sweat forming around your collar where your necklace was clasped. It seemed to sear into your skin as you fumbled over your words, deciding what to say to the stranger who’d placed himself in front of you like an apparition.

“I… no, I’m here by myself. Working, I’m, uh. Just working.” Strangely, you noticed him make a fist to himself, concealed partly by the table, but his gesture of victory was obvious, as if he’d just won a bet or something. The blonde composed himself then with a twitch of his neck, nodding evenly, instantaneously cool as a cucumber again. His bright blue eyes studied you, your laptop and planner on the desk, your bag hanging across the arm of the chair. You’d never needed the air conditioning to be effective more so than this moment. Crank it way up – igloo this place all the way.

“Excellent. My name’s Ken.” Big blue eyes finally locking with yours, he puffed his chest out, like a purple and green speckled peacock trying to attract a mate with his confidence, his easy bravado. Though it was difficult to ignore the openness – the curiosity in his eyes as he took you in.

Like it was his first time talking to a woman, or at least trying to do… whatever he was doing right now with you.

You felt that your instincts would warn you if this neatly manicured man was making you uneasy or frightened, but you didn’t notice an inkling of displeasure. On the contrary, it was almost electrifying to be stared at like this. Flattering.

Had been months, almost a year since anyone paid attention to you like this.

“Ken?” Unable to stop the laugh, you tilted your head sideways, scooting your chair back to get a better look at him. “I don’t think I’ve ever met a Ken. Wait – I’m sorry, that’s not true. My dad’s boss was named Ken. But you wouldn’t, um. You wouldn’t know him. At least I don’t think so, I have no idea where you’re from. He was an engineer, this senior engineer for a huge company in New Jersey… we don’t keep in touch, he’s sort of an asshole.” You found yourself rambling on as you drank this surprising man in, freely sharing details about yourself without even telling him your name first.

But what an interesting view he was. Painted still with this deeply intoxicating smile, pupils darting and eager like an energetic puppy.

“I am not from New Jersey. But I’m sorry the other Ken was – what did you call him?”

“An... asshole?”

“Yes, I’m sorry he was that.” Your long winded introduction didn’t seem to bother him one bit. He kept his gaze unmoving right on your face, like he was terrified to break eye contact.

You eyed his white cowboy boots (did people still wear those?), black leather pants that hugged his legs like a gift from the heavens, and a long sleeved white denim jacket that appeared to be cropped, revealing just a hint of his lower stomach, and when you caught your eyes lingering for just too long on the tanned patch of skin peeking out, you sighed, shutting yourself up.

You couldn’t shake one thing, though; leather and denim on a day like this? It was nearly ninety outside, you remembered, and cocked your head at him.

“Oh, I was talking about my dad, not his boss. And I’m (Y/N), by the way.”

“A lovely name for a lovely lady,” Ken replied, studying you to gauge your reaction to his compliment. It was clear Ken was attempting to hit on you, and it was equal parts unfamiliar and gratifying.

“Thank you. I’ve never had anyone say that about my name.” Ken winced as if shot through the heart, his flawless eyebrows flying up to his flawless hairline, and he clutched at the buttons on his jacket. This display would have probably seemed incredibly dramatic on any other man, but for some reason it read as… serious on Ken.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

You shook your head. “I’m not.”

“That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard.”

“Well, I really appreciate your honesty, Ken.”

“It’s no problem at all. I would never lie to you. Not in a hundred million years.”

Very heartfelt words coming from someone you’ve known for all of… four minutes, generously.

You quirked your head, caught off guard by his comment. “I… thank you. If you don’t mind me asking, what brought you over… here? To sit with me, I mean?”

This caused a beam to unfold across Ken’s face, and he leaned back in the chair, perching his chin up so as to look professional. “Can I tell you the truth?”

“Well. Yes, I’d like that.”

“I saw you here last week. On – what’s the one that starts with an ‘F’?” Ken screwed his eyes shut, scanning his brain meticulously for a piece of very common, everyday information.

This is a bizarre way to flirt with someone for the first time, you thought to yourself, bewilderment sinking into your gut as you helpfully offered, “Friday?”

“Yes! That’s it. Friday,” He uttered to himself and dropped his eyes, seemingly making a mental note. “So, I saw you here Friday. You were getting a book from right over there.” Ken pointed to the magazine rack nestled against the front desk that you once in awhile perused when the weekend approached, for lack of anything better to do at home.

You had checked out a magazine last Friday, in fact, after you clocked out for the day and packed up your things. It wasn’t anything special, just a stupid crossword puzzle collection with a recipe for a quiche you wanted to try making.

“You saw me on Friday and didn’t say anything?”

“Exactly. You got the magazine, and then you walked home, and I didn’t know what to say because you were already inside. So then I walked back here – the library – and waited in case you came back. But that rude lady up there told me they were closing at nine, so I had to leave. Actually, she told me a little more than that. She said that I couldn’t loiter, whatever that is, but I was free to check out a book, so I asked her what book you had just gotten. But she didn’t want to tell me that for some reason.”

Ken recounted this like he was describing the weather with a colleague, just simple, redundant water cooler talk. Your jaw hung open in disbelief. Was he being serious? You’d finished work at four thirty. He sat here, allegedly for hours until it closed?

He’d followed you home?

Before you could interject with a dozen questions flying through your mind, Ken continued.

“Anyway, I thought about walking back to your house – and you have a big house, by the way! I had a feeling you would. You seem like a very successful lady. That’s why I had to meet you. Successful, captivating, beautiful, I couldn’t just go all the way back to Barbieland after I saw you!”

Had he mistook your apartment complex to be something you owned? And – what did he just say?

“Go back. To Barbieland.” You stated, smile faltering quicker than Ken managed to absolutely stun you with his fanatical tale.

“Right? I knew you would understand. I just knew you would, (Y/N)! Not to mention how long it took me to get here in the first place. So after security kicked me out –”

“Hold on, I’m sorry. I just… Ken?”

“Yes, my dove?” Ken’s taken to periodically toying with his jacket in positions that display his pronounced biceps. It’s endearing. It’s distracting. He’s stiflingly mesmerizing.

“Okay. Can we back up for a moment?”

Ken’s wide eyes regard you with infinite patience, wisps of his almost silver-like bangs falling against his brow bone. You remember that it’s only noon, and you’re still technically on the clock. In fact, your supervisor is almost certainly trying to get ahold of you for his midday rounds, checking on your team’s progress for the day.

“Ask me anything you want. I am an open book. Especially for you.” He enunciates each syllable, adoring eyes raking over you again, and it’s beginning to feel a bit too much – and there’s a lot more information you need to derive from Ken before you can backpedal to… introductions and amicable conversation. (Not to mention the curling heat that’s pooling in your lower abdomen the more Ken devours you visually. He may have just dropped a bomb on you, yes, but he’s… well. He’s bewitching, alluring in a fashion that’s barely comprehensible.)

“Right. Here’s where I’m at. With all of this. I am very flattered by you, and your… dedication to finding me.”

Ken’s grin overtakes his face, eye lines wrinkling with complete satisfaction. You almost forget your next words, forget to draw a line in the sand with this (gorgeous) stranger who’s just admitted to essentially stalking you.

But somehow, the pit in your stomach ceases its knotting when you meet his honest cobalt eyes. Not a hint of malice behind them, not a shred of ill intention. Not for the first time since you’d met Ken, you’re astounded that with any other man this behavior would scare you, probably compel you to call the police, even. Maybe you’d misjudged him.

He forgot the word for Friday, for Christ’s sake.

But then there was this talk about traveling a long way to come here… about Barbie? This didn’t sit right with you, and the concept that Ken might be mentally unwell dawned on you, though he seemed coherent and relatively well spoken. Just a half hour ago you’d been toiling away with spreadsheets, and now you were silently cataloging all psychiatric facilities within a ten mile radius, wondering if a man of average height and average build could walk that far on a sweltering hot day. And still look, for lack of a better word, perfect.

As you sat agonizing over the right words to say, Ken merely watched with his hands in his lap, boot tapping against his knee with no discernible rhythm. Patient with an emotion akin to devotion swimming through his watchful gaze.

“Ken… where are you staying?”

“What do you mean?”

“Where have you been staying while you’ve been in town? Do you live around here?”

Ken smirked again, leaned in close to you, resting his elbows on your work laptop. “There’s that humor I like about you. Silly girl. I already told you, I live in Barbieland. It takes me seven hours to get here!”

“Okay. Right. So, let’s try this. Friday when I went home and you came back here. You remember that?”

“Uh huh,” Ken bobbed his head with sincerity, unfazed by this line of questioning, not picking up on how perturbed you’d grown.

“Where did you sleep that night? Do you know anyone here?”

Ken took his bottom lip in between his teeth, thoughtfully chewed on it. “Besides you, I don’t think so. The book lady who kicked me out doesn’t count as knowing someone. Right?”

“...Probably not. So where did you sleep?” You didn’t have the heart to tell Ken he didn’t really know you.

“I didn’t.”

“Sleep. You didn’t sleep?”

“No one’s asked me that before. I don’t really… get tired.” This confession strikes you as highly strange.

Your head began to feel fuzzy, and you guessed it wasn’t from skipping breakfast this morning. At least the sweat on your back had finally dried, and you inhaled deeply, trying not to startle Ken with your obvious worries.

“How about we do this. As you can see, I’m working right now,” you open your hand towards your long forgotten computer. “Well, I was working. And I’m not done for a few hours. But I think that we need to sit and talk about… everything. That you’ve told me.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll just wait here with you until you’re done! Look – I wanted to show you this. I even got a book before you got here.” Ken seems excited to share, so you purse your lips, watch him as he procures a book from underneath his chair.

Ken holds out and frames a well worn paperback titled “Misty of Chincoteague”, frayed at the edges and featuring a wistful painting of a horse on the cover. For some reason, this childlike display of wonder touches you, and against all reason you’d ever acquired throughout your life, something nags at your conscience to trust this strange man – something tells you, like a mantra beating in time with your heart, that this man is not a threat to you, he is not going to hurt you.

“Are you a horse lover?”

“I’m more of a horse admirer… they intrigue me,” Ken quips, scanning your face again to see how you’re reacting to him. He seems to be at once keenly self aware and simultaneously oblivious to how he sounds – how he’s received by others. This man is a conundrum, made up of so many conflicting personality traits and mannerisms that don’t belong together but mesh nonetheless.

And, you tell yourself, you’re still giving him your undivided attention.

“I wouldn��t have guessed that about you.”

“Really?” Ken’s act of unbothered macho-man seems to slip slightly as his eyes bulge, intently seeking for validation, wanting to hear you talk more about him, your impression of him so far. Maybe this is the way to get more information out of him, you realize, so you humor him.

“Not at all, Ken. Tell you what – why don’t you come back with me to my ap… my house, and you can tell me more about the things you like? Would you like that?”

In the minutes since you’d begun talking to him, Ken shone brighter than ever, practically buzzing with enthusiasm, gilded with a golden halo from the unrepentant sun as he tucked a strand of hair behind his ear. “Perfect. You lead the way, I’m ready whenever you are!”

#ken #barbie movie #ryan gosling #ken x reader #ryan gosling ken #ken x fem reader #ken barbie #female reader

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everlasting-rainfall · 1 year

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In skin into fur, I couldn't help but latch onto that one brief mentioning of Lucci hanging out around the giraffe enclosure and wonder if that means Kaku is also there for the same reason.

This led to me thinking about how giraffes go about courting, and how males will just beat the shit out of each other with their necks for dominance. Like I'm picturing Kaku waiting until the object of his affection is walking by and then just slamming into a poor unfortunate zookeeper as a display of strength. He quickly whips around to see if they look impressed and is confused (and jealous) to see them fretting over the zookeeper he just obliterated.

At least the gift giving would be more tame though? Instead of finding dead animals in their locker there's just like... a large branch with lots of leaves sticking out of it

I’m glad that you liked the Animal Shifter AU, I’m thinking of calling it Skin into Fur AU but I also might not so feel free to just call it whatever you guys want as long as it isn’t something mean

Anyways let’s get into it!

!-MINORS DO NOT INTERACT AT ALL-!

!-POTENTIAL TRIGGER WARNINGS-!

Stalking, Violence, Human into Animal Transformation, Pee Mention, Dead Animals, Deception, Jealousy

!-POTENTIAL TRIGGER WARNINGS-!

!-MINORS DO NOT INTERACT AT ALL-!

Yeah! That does mean that that Kaku is here too, I’m glad that you picked up on it! Basically a lot of animal shifters have been known to make it so that they appear as regular animals although others do just decide to appear human

Some appear as house pets, others are wild animals like that raccoon behind the corner store, and others like Lucci choose to live in zoo’s or wildlife sanctuary’s

The purpose of it being a lot of things like some of them have simply decided to live out their lives there until the day that animal shifters take over the world and become the dominant species of earth while others use it as a way to more easily find mates and breed as a lot of people are around

An animal shifter will never take a normal animal as a mate though as that’s really weird even to them so typically an animal shifter will just take another animal shifter as a mate or a human they intend to court in a similar fashion to how an animal would until they eventually mate them turning them into an animal shifter too

Also I can’t say that I know too much about animal courtship methods but I do know something about giraffes and it’s that males will actually headbutt a female until they pee then they drink it to see if the female is fertile or something like that but let’s not think too much about that, yeah?

But that would be pretty interesting like that thing you brought up like let’s say that the male zookeeper is the one that’s been caring for Kaku way before you came along and Kaku has never had any problems with him

Doesn’t like him too much but he’s not a problem and he keeps the enclosure clean and sanitary while also keeping Kaku fed so he won’t cause any issues

But then comes the day that you get hired and I can imagine that when you walk in with the male zookeeper, it’s like a stereotypical scene where there’s like pink at the edges of the screen and some kind of romantic music in the background as Kaku looks at you

Definitely follows you around the enclosure a bunch eventually deciding that he wants you specifically as his mate but before he can start courting you, it seems like the male zookeeper has taken an interest in you too!! How dare he!!

(In actuality, all he did was ask if you wanted to go out to get some food together after work)

So next time that he gets a chance when you and the zookeeper are both near his enclosure, it’s time to show him just whose the better man so he waits for you to be watching then obliterates the male zookeeper just like you said

He’s so proud of himself, he took down the competition in one blow! Look at you running towards him, you’re likely going to accept him as your mate and let him fill you with his-! Wait, wait a second… You just ran past him…

You’re checking on the male zookeeper and dragging him off to safety which likely does not goes over well with Kaku, he won the fight so you should be recognizing him as the better person to mate but he has all of your attention…

Jealousy is rising and he figures it’s time to take matters into his own hands…

He’ll do exactly what Lucci did by leaving you gifts and things and it would be a hell of a lot tamer like it probably is branches but I can also see Kaku thinking of what human related things you might like

Like maybe a giraffe plush to remind you of him? That might get you accused of stealing though so this may take a while

Honestly though, his gift giving would definitely be a lot tamer than Lucci’s like if you worked there at the same time that Lucci’s S/O went missing then it’s probably worrying but at least it isn’t dead animals, yeah?

At most, it’s stuff that Kaku thinks you would enjoy and also things to help you get used to what’s soon going to be your new life as soon you’ll be an animal shifter just like him living in this zoo with him as another giraffe

Like I can just imagine him looking at a branch in his enclosure while he’s chomping down on some of the leaves and going “Hmm, that seems like it would be nice” then just getting offended when he checks around at night to see if you took it only to find it in the trash bin

How rude of you! But no matter, he doesn’t care too much as he knows that you’ll come around and even if you don’t then there’s not much that you can do about it as you’ll have to get used to it eventually when another giraffe mysteriously appears in the enclosure

#yandere one piece #yandere #reader insert #read the trigger warnings #the rain talks back #yandere male #one piece #minors dni #Yandere kaku #Yandere CP9 #animal shifter au #Skin into Fur AU

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is-the-snake-video-cute · 2 years

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I messed up and I really need help. I bought a ball python a few weeks ago (the people at the pet store said they were really good first snakes) and she's not doing well at all. The pet store told me to keep her on a heat mat and her tank isn't getting warm enough, I can't get her to eat anything, and I can't get the humidity in her tank anywhere near where it's supposed to be. I don't know what to do, please help! I didn't know any of this stuff before I bought her and I feel way out of my depth here.

Okay, don't panic! We can only do the best we can with the information that we have, and snakes aren't intuitive pets when you're new to keeping reptiles. These are all very common issues that first-time snake owners with ball pythons run into, and they're all fixable.

Heat mats aren't my recommended heat source for ball pythons because they don't raise the ambient temperatures in the enclosure, which is the issue you're running into here. If you go grab a heat dome and a ceramic heat emitter, that'll raise your ambient temps to where they need to be.

Now! Humidity is a big challenge for new ball python owners, and it's fixable, too, but it might take a bit more work. If she's in an enclosure with a screen lid, I recommend taking a sheet of tinfoil and taping over at least half of the lid to keep some humidity in. Switch to a humidity-retaining substrate (cypress mulch and coconut husk are easy to find and work well!), and dump water directly into the substrate. That'll help a lot. Add some nice big water bowls (nothing wrong with using tupperware if that's what you've got), and make a humidity box so she'll always have a very humid area (cut a hole in the lid of a food storage container big enough for her to curl up in, then fill it with damp moss or damp paper towels), and you'll have a happy, well-hydrated snake!

Taking care of your husbandry problems are the first step to getting your snake to eat! Ball pythons are sensitive, so she most likely won't eat until she feels comfortable. Be patient - it's scary when your snake won't eat, but be sure not to offer food too frequently (no less than five days between offerings) so you don't stress her out. I recommend making sure she feels safe in her enclosure, as well - make sure you have at least two identical hides, one on either side of her enclosure! Snakes need to feel hidden and safe. Here's my guide on how to prepare food for snakes.

Your snake is probably going to be just fine, but since she's been too cold and probably at least a little dehydrated, it's a good idea to be on the lookout for any health problems, just in case. Look for heavy, open-mouthed breathing and listen for wheezing/clicking/popping noises, and if you notice them (or any other symptoms that make you concerned), get her to a vet ASAP.

Good luck, and please do let me know if you run into any problems or have questions. You're doing the right thing by asking for help, and the problems you're having are absolutely fixable! :)

#not a rating #ball pythons #snake husbandry

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preciadosbass · 2 months

Text

2/8/24

woke up at aprox. 8:30 and it took me absolutely ages to get out of bed. i’ve had no need to wake up anywhere near this ‘early’ since school. i eventually got dressed and spent most of the morning being indecisive over which shirt i was going to wear. i ended up wearing my saw [2004] shirt because it’s easy to theme that with my belts and things. my mum let boris lick the lid off a yogurt and it was so cute. i wish i got it on video or something

we left at like 10:10 to go to this reptile based experience place. hopefully i’ll be able to work there part time or something soon but nobody’s sure yet because we might’ve found a college for me to go to. either way, i’d like to do both if i can squeeze it in. we were late but still saw the first animal being shown, it was a tortoise called pancake. they have really unusual names for the animals there.

there’s this guy that works there that’s very similar to me, except he’s an adult. i get really tense around him though because i wish i was him so much. he has all my dream piercings, long hair [but in a masc way], really cool tattoos, he’s really friendly, and he’s cis. i know jealousy is bad but i can’t help it when i can’t like out my life as a guy like i ache to. i wish i could keep my long [ish] hair and look like a dude. anyway, here’s a list of all the animals i saw:

[spellings/names could be wrong as i was going by ear] // greek spurthigh tortoise, bearded dragon [hes called boris like my cat, i see him everytime i go so he’s gotten used to me now, he likes to lay on me], uromastyx, pac man frog, green tree frog, blue toungued skink [i handled one of these like a week ago at another reptile experience thing], leopard gecko, acki monitor, chiliean rose tarantula, mexican red leg tarantula, salmon pink tarantula, bird eating tarantula, mexican blonde tarantula, jumping spiders, ball python, and a milk snake.

i watched the ball python eat a mouse which interesting as i’ve never seen a snake have food before. i thought the whole process [the eating process, not the digestion process] would take longer than it did. after the session ended and everyone else there left i took boris out of his enclosure and let him sit on me for a bit. everytime i see him he seems to be more comfy around me, but to be fair, i don’t think he cares who he’s with. my sister went this time, which was a change, but now she’s got it in her head that she’s getting a bearded dragon. which is definitely not happening.

after leaving we headed to the new cinema that just opened for this racing thing being hosted there. on the way there we saw those people that go around in those huge t rex costume things. continuing on talk about the racing thing, i thought it’d be like, everyone has a console and it’s connected to the screen somehow? but there was this racing chair and a steering wheel thing infront of the screen, and people took turns to speed around the track shown on the screen + computer thing infront of them. i convinced my mum and sister to try it and it was fun/funny regardless of the fact it wasn’t what any of us thought it was.

afterwards we went home and my sister insisted to show me paramore + fall out boy on fortnite [and some other bands i like] and then i went to youth club. i don’t have too much to say about it, honestly. i never do. it was the same as always, i just awkwardly sat there while everyone spoke to eachother. i listened to this history - obsessed girl called christina speak to jester about greek mythology, i didn’t understand a thing, but it was impressive that they both knew as much as they did. they went into the shop next to the club afterwards and i got sweets for my sister.

i stupidly didn’t check the packet until we were on the way back home but she’s allergic to them. so i’ve somehow got to find an excuse to not eat them, even though i want to. one sweet takes up like a quarter of the food i can eat in a day. anyway so yeah, i just sat outside checking the time every once in a while for two and a half hours. just like i said last time i talked about youth club, i wish people talked to me. i once again went in hopes that those two girls were there but they weren’t. i dont know when they attend or what they’re names are so i cant ask jester.

hopefully i’ll have some luck the next time i go, sometimes going makes me feel like i’m just being mocked about not having any friends, like, it really rubs it in my face. carrying on, i got back home and cuddled boris. i went out again at 8 something for my walk. it was already dark by the time i got into my ‘walking clothes’ so we tried walking wherever it’d be lightest. we went back over to that field where you can see london and down to the bottom where you enter another field.

i spoke about this being the longest i’ve ever tracked what i do in the days and about that ‘acquaintance’ i’ve written about previously as they’re starting to purposely stalk all of my accounts more even though i told them i like having space irl and online, and when i make private accounts it’s obvious i want them to be private. they just won’t listen, they found my twitter account where i occasionally vent and they keep on taking the mick out of me. i’m so sick of their shit.

anyway, we walked for 45-50 minutes tonight which isn’t as long as what i’d hoped but to be fair, it was my problem for not getting going sooner than what i did. because boris has been sitting at the kitchen windowsill recently, i knocked on the glass and he looked at me in the most adorable way ever through the window. when i got in inside, as you can expect, i stayed with him + cuddled him as much as i could considering how awkward he’s positioned from the kitchen chairs.

afterwards my parents went upstairs to listen to their radio programme — i watched mcr interviews + clips for an hour and a half, maybe two hours until i came up to my parents to ask the questions about boris. it took ages because my mind kept on going blank and id forget a routined thing i say everynight which was freaking me out. id gotten through all the questions apart from the last two when i realised my sister was awake. ive never asked the questions while my sisters been awake so as stupid as it sounds, this freaked me out more.

i am/was scared that itd mess up everything i’d just said to my parents as it’s a change in the routine so i speedran through the questions again. as we got to the last two questions again my mum started arguing with me and screaming at me. i completely get her frustration, i know i’m really, especially annoying when it comes to my ‘compulsions’ and i know that she was tired, but she kept on screaming directly into my ear even though i was already hyperventilating over boris being not okay despite me telling her my ears hurt. like i was kind of saying, i don’t blame her though.

i wish i could be a better child to them. once i forced myself to end the questions i went downstairs and sat with boris for 30/40 minutes while i ate yogurt. he was purring the whole time, i hope it was the happy type of purr. i went to do my teeth and came back to say goodnight to boris at like 2. i was so exhausted i even forgot parts of my goodnight routine i say to boris which i have never done and never thought i would do.

i know he dosent understand most of what i say [probably] but i told him that it was just because in knackered because that was the case and i don’t want him thinking i care about him/love him less because of my forgetfulness. i don’t know how to explain it, but i didn’t forget it, i just couldn’t remember it. because i knew what i wanted to say but i didn’t know what order to put it in. i said what i thought was closest, fed him and got into bed at 2:50. i then typed out all the different versions of what i think that sentence was supposed to be and i’m pretty sure i’ve worked out what phrases are right/wrong. actually went to sleep at 3:30.

have a good day/night -_<

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trulybetty · 11 months

Text

oct' 20 x sweater weather

Prompt: sweater weather Pairing: dieter x bryony (ofc) Word Count: 839 Warnings: un-beta'd is the name of the game, dieter bravo & just fluff Summary: when dieter met fiona

x. masterlist

this is for you fiona anon 💗🦛:

Bryony had warned him to pack a sweater in his bag, he’d insisted he didn’t need one.

“I lived in Ohio,” he scoffed, “I know what it’s like there.”

Bryony hadn’t wanted to remind him that he’d lived out in LA now longer than he had any other state, including New York where winters could be cruel. She also wasn’t going to mention he lived in Ohio for all of six months when he was eight either. It was best sometimes not to get into the finer details with Dieter or you could find yourself debating something completely different to what you started on.

So she was currently waiting for him to admit he was wrong as they waited in a private area of the airport for their car, one perk of travelling with celebrity, as he crossed his arms at his chest in an obvious attempt to stave off the chill in the fall air.

“So we’re going to the hotel first, right?” Dieter asked.

“No, the car is taking us straight to the event.” Came a voice from behind the couple, Rosie Jones, all five foot nothing, petite, red headed powerhouse who was furiously tapping at one of her three phones that she carried at all times.

Dieters first ever publicist, well first he had actually acknowledged and first that he sometimes listened to.

“That’s a shame,” Bryony muttered as she inspected her nails, this week they were stiletto shaped in an ombré of grey and soft pinks, Dieters choice. “If we were going to the hotel I could have grabbed myself an extra sweater.” She tugged her coat tighter around her.

Dieter narrowed his eyes at her, “How far away is the car?” He asked, turning to Rosie.

She didn’t look up from her screen, “Should be here in the next couple of minutes.”

“What’s the matter Mr. Ohio, cold?” Bryony asked, she swore she saw his teeth chatter.

“No, just curious about the schedule,” Dieter replied.

After a short ride, they arrived at their destination, the Cincinnati Zoo.

The moment they stepped out of the car, the chill hit Dieter once more, causing him to shiver involuntarily. Bryony gave him a knowing look but was met with a trademark Dieter grin.

Trying to keep his dignity intact, he quickly steered towards the gift shop as Rosie threw her arms up in defeat as she had just been mid sentence explaining how the photo op was going to go.

Five minutes later Dieter reappeared wearing a bright pink crew neck sweater, not out of the ordinary by any means. Except it was emblazoned with the name Fiona and an image of the animal in question.

Bryony rolled her eyes, “Feeling warmer Bravo?”

“It's sweater weather,” He responded, “Didn't want to disappoint Fiona.”

The trio headed towards Fiona's enclosure. As they approached, Dieter's excitement became evident. For all his flamboyancy and celebrity persona, there was a child-like wonder in his eyes as he neared the hippo enclosure.

Bryony nudged him, “Look at you, all giddy.”

“It's not every day you get to visit with your hippo bestie!” he retorted.

Rosie briefed Dieter about the photo op, emphasizing the importance of promoting his role as an ambassador for the zoo. The zookeepers had set up a special private event, allowing Dieter to feed Fiona a pumpkin, marking the beginning of the fall season.

Bryony watched, amusement clear in her eyes, as Dieter gingerly held the pumpkin out towards Fiona, his eyes wide in awe as the massive creature gently took the treat from him. The flashes from cameras around captured the moment, but Bryony knew the true joy in Dieter's heart would remain a cherished memory.

“I can't believe this is my second time meeting Fiona!” Dieter gushed as they walked away from the enclosure, his steps light despite the cold. “Thank you, Bry, for coming out here with me.”

She let out a small chuckle and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “Well, I had to make sure you didn't try to jump into the enclosure or something. That, and making sure you actually came home.”

Dieter chuckled. “I might be a lot of things, but I’m not about to leave you for Fiona. Anyway, I think, just maybe, you rank a tiny bit higher than Fiona in my heart.”

Raising an eyebrow, she teased, “Really? Even after she just let you feed her a pumpkin?”

He winked at her, “Well, Fiona might let me feed her pumpkins, but you let me—”

Bryony cut him off with a laugh, “Let's keep in G rated Bravo, we’re in a family establishment.” Reaching out, she intertwined her fingers with his and pulled him close. She rose up on her toes to press her lips against his. When they parted, she smiled up at him, never tired of the dopey grin he got when they kissed, “But why don't we head back to the hotel and you can elaborate on what it is I let's you do?”

#october x 500 #autumnal offerings #dieter x bryony #dieter bravo fanfic #dieter bravo fanfiction #dieter bravo x ofc #dieter bravo x oc #pedro pascal character fanfiction

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princeandrogyne · 2 days

Note

hey hello it’s your high-word-count friend here. really really appreciated your response, it has been recieved! i'm pretty terrible at responding to responses for some reason. I think I just think too much about words and thoughts and the pressure to decently communicate an appropriate reaction, it's easier to throw word vomit at the screen at a late night whim to an online stranger than to actually properly acknowledge a really thoughtful and well written and kind response to said word vomit. it was a really lovely response. i didn't know if it'd be worth it to be so weirdly raw as an anonymous presence in a tumblr inbox but I gotta say, it was nice to be seen. I think it was worth it. thank you.

I was gonna write a big longer thing but it might need more work-shopping so I perhaps will come back soon. tangentially related I wanted to indulge in some unstructured pondering about dog metaphors to say: that domesticated dog thing you said at some point on your blog....yeahh. it's very relatable... I once met a shaky little shitzu and I realized I was just like it. would never be equipped to live in the reality of the wild, yet still scared of the world in my enclosure. needing care, being far too attached to the people who feed me, yet always wanting to bite. being yelled at but not really learning much from it other than the fact I don't want to be yelled at again. I end up doing everything to make people happy (or at least not mad at me) I listen to instructions and jump through every hoop they put there just because what else do I have, really? I always want to bite but I never do, maybe I know that evolutionarily my teeth have dulled. I guess I wouldn't be such a terrible dog. not a great human though.

I used to have a dog. she'd always bark and snap if my parents or anyone got near me. I'm not big on touch, especially from my parents, so it was kind of nice to have a personal guard dog at times, looking out for me. I didn't think she really liked me. she'd snap if I got close to her sometimes, and often just straight up ignored me. so I never got why she was so territorial over me in those instances. but I appreciated it.

ok thanks for reading, I'll probably come visit more time to time, but absolutely no pressure to ever respond, or hell, even read these only somewhat sensical messages. against all my better judgement I do think you're a cool person and also yeah your blog sparks some kind of light in me that actually inspires me to speak whatever part of my mind that I usually try and suppress in order to fulfill my supposed function as a "well-adjusted member of society" so that's perhaps why I'm here, and maybe why I'll stick around? and if I ever overstep please take the executive order to like. tumblr kill me or something and delete such asks. that probably shouldn't happen since clearly I'm a weird anxious and antsy person who cares so much about boundaries as to write disclaimers on a fully anonymous message but uhh. what was I saying. this is probably a good time to cut it off holy shit I ramble like I have nowhere to be (which I really don't haha) may the universe send you good fortune and the energy to keep going! peace and love and thanks again!

Hello! I am naming you longnon, if you ever want to take a look at your asks it should be under that!

This response may be a bit shorter because I'm quite exhausted. I love responding to people. I love talking and communicating and learning and making connections. You are a gift to me. I hope you do visit me again, however often you want, with anything you'd like to say. I think it's funny that I demonstrate parts of people that they usually want to suppress. And a little sad, but I think it's accurate to the situation.

I think your dog loved you even though she didn't like you.

#txt #answered #anon #longnon

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corduroyserpent · 2 years

Text

gongzhiweek2022 day 3: college

“What’s that sound?” The shaky section of Tianlang-jun’s face taking up the entirety of Zhuzhi-lang’s phone screen narrows to a close-up of his deep black eye and a tapered brow raised in aggressive curiosity. “Did Binghe take my advice?”

Zhuzhi-lang sighs. “Yes. He is throwing a party.”

“Oho! Excellent! Xiyan did you hear th— Ah, she’s checking us in. I should go, but please remind my beautiful son that I’m expecting him to be in bed by ten at the latest with that TA of his or else what was the point of a sudden vacation leading to a lack of parental supervision? It’s a good trope, works every time.”

One might argue that Zhuzhi-lang counts as supervision considering he’s old enough to be the parent of some of these kids. But then again, he also has no plans to leave his room until every single drunk college student has been swept from the premises. The party was already in full swing by the time Zhuzhi-lang finished feeding his ball python earlier and needed to wash his hands, so he’s had his fill of sliding past rambunctious strangers for the night.

He did see his cousin sitting on Shen Yuan’s lap on the way back though. “I don’t believe Binghe will need a reminder…”

“That’s my boy!” Tianlang-jun grins. “All right, I’ll stop bothering you. Go have fun.” He hangs up.

Zhuzhi-lang isn’t sure whether to laugh or cry as he carefully sets his phone down on his desk; the shimmering green case recently got a crack near the charging port and he’s wary of breaking it further. Surely Tianlang-jun doesn’t expect Zhuzhi-lang to go out there? His alcohol tolerance is nonexistent and his desire to mingle with people is similarly absent. He’ll just stay in his little cave and hope nothing gets broken. Maybe he can start reading that Heaven Official’s…something that Binghe likes so much.

His door creaks open. A familiar voice exclaims, “Oops, sorry! Wrong room.”

Zhuzhi-lang’s head whips up to see a young man in a cream colored sweater, long dark hair tied up in a messy bun. What are the odds… “Gongyi Xiao?”

“Yeah, hi.” Gongyi Xiao smiles with a tinge of shyness. Similar to the sheepish look Zhuzhi-lang had gotten used to during their single terrible tutoring session. Gongyi Xiao had ended up dropping the introductory herpetology course and Zhuzhi-lang hadn’t seen him since. “I can’t believe you remember me.”

“Of course I do!” Zhuzhi-lang is completely genuine when he says, “I have never met someone so handsome and yet so terrible at reptilian biology.”

Gongyi Xiao’s eyes widen, his smile shifting slightly. Zhuzhi-lang realizes that his words might have come across wrong so he adds, “I’m not criticizing you. It’s just a fact. Would you like to see my snake? She’s resting right now but—oh, you probably want to get back to the party. My apologies.”

“Actually” —Gongyi Xiao glances behind him then steps further inside, closing the door— “I was just looking for a quiet place to hang out. It’s getting pretty wild out there.” His cheeks still hold a light flush, probably from the heat of so many people packed together. He heads towards the large enclosure across from Zhuzhi-lang’s bed. “Does your snake have a name?”

“Not one that humans can understand.” Zhuzhi-lang joins him. Gongyi Xiao’s head only comes up to Zhuzhi-lang’s shoulder. “You can call her Mushroom if you want.”

“That’s cute.”

Zhuzhi-lang glances down, admiring Gongyi Xiao while the latter is focused on the contents of the enclosure.

Mushroom isn’t the only one who’s cute.

#gongzhi #zhuzhi lang #gongyi xiao #tianlang jun #svsss #svsss fanfic #my fic

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jeschalynn · 2 years

Text

what fester saw (part 1)

aka "Fester is confused by awkward human courtship rituals."

part 2 /// part 3

Warnings: swearing, brief threats of violence, mentions of self-harm/self-mutilation but nothing explicit, more swearing. Reader/MC mentioned is gender-neutral. POV is a tarantula btw. Word count: 970ish

Original source content is NSFW/18+/MINORS DNI.

Author’s note: Fester, Ketamine, and Casanova belong to @cannibalsweetheart.

Fester poked his head out of his burrow when he heard a door slam closed nearby. He perked up at the sound of his human’s voice. His human was upset about something. Fester could hear anger thrumming with every word, and the words humans used for cursing others were trickling freely like drops of acid rain.

Fester skittered excitedly within his enclosure while he waited for his human to come see him. It didn’t take long.

“I already fucking told you, Valentine,” his human spat as he barged into the room, “I didn’t fucking see it. Leave me the fuck alone before I come back there and end you.” His human tossed the talking device onto his bed and muttered in that other language he used only in his darker moods. He shuffled in and out of the room a few times as he completed some of his coming-home rituals. After a few minutes, he walked over to Fester’s enclosure and reached a hand inside. Fester nearly pounced onto the offered palm.

His human laid down on his bed and set Fester on his chest. This was a reward for their special friendship. His human would breathe quietly or vent to Fester about something that annoyed him at the place he works while he pet Fester soothingly. He spoke of many humans in vague detail, but Valentine was a regular mention on days when his mood seemed especially sour. Fester scampered around on his human’s chest for a few moments before settling into the comfortable slope near his ribs.

The quiet calm of the room was broken by the talking device buzzing nearby. His human sighed and flicked his fingers against the screen, not bothering to take his eyes off the ceiling he had been glaring at. “You must have a fucking death wish if you’re bothering me about this shit again.”

There was a moment of silence. A cough came through the speaker. “Um, I’m sorry. Ket?”

Fester didn’t recognize this voice, but his human did. He shot up into a sitting position and Fester would’ve gone tumbling into the bed covers if there wasn’t a warm hand holding him in place. His human was so thoughtful.

“What d’you fucking want?” his human snarled.

“Uhh, I wanted to apologize. I didn’t think Cas would bother you like that. I know you had a long day.” The other human’s voice had a slight tremor and sounded uneasy. Fester knew his human caused this reaction in others. He could be very intimidating.

“Whatever,” his human said. “Lose my fucking number. Keep a better eye on your shit.”

“I know, I know. I got it from Cas, I think he was trying to help but you know how he gets. I promise it's not a big deal. Anyway, sorry again and good-“

His human tapped the screen and the unfamiliar voice cut off. Fester felt calloused fingertips brush against him carefully and he wiggled a bit in contentment.

“Let’s go for a walk, buddy.”

Fester often accompanied his human while he completed chores around their domicile. He had a preferred shelf in the main living area that gave him the best view of the kitchen and the balcony outside. He sat there now as his human rooted through cupboards in the kitchen and started fixing a drink. He had taken off his shirt earlier and Fester watched scars flex across his skin as he moved.

His human contained the wild power of a storm that kept most humans from wanting to get too close. Fester learned quickly that humans liked to engage in physical courtship but none lasted longer than that. He knew they didn’t like the storm inside his human, the one that caused his anger to flare and the silence around him to crackle. His human’s trust was buried deep. Fester wondered if his human was lonely because it had been so long since a potential mate had visited. If being without a mate bothered him, he didn’t show it. He was good at hiding his weaknesses.

In the past, Fester had watched his human carve at his own skin that healed into a labyrinth of raised scars and strange markings. Undeserving mates called his body ugly. Fester knew humans could be weak, but his human was resilient. He was a fighter, a hunter, and a capable provider. Those would-be mates of his past were unworthy. A true mate for his human would recognize his strength for what it was.

Fester noticed his human had finished his drink and tidying up, and he paused in the middle of the living area. The room was spotless now except for his work bag that had been dropped beside the couch. His human approached the bag with a hesitant step. Fester looked on in concern. The expression on his human’s face was indescribable - there was a glint in his eye he’d never seen before. He was very rarely fearful, so what could it be?

His human fiddled with some clasps on the bag before pulling out a long piece of fabric. It looked well-worn but clean, like so many of his human’s favourite coverings. Fester didn’t recognize it. His human gathered it in his hands and slowly wrapped it loosely around his neck. Fester heard his human take long sniffs like he was scenting something unfamiliar but delicious. Something like prey.

“Fucking MC,” his human muttered quietly. Fester didn’t recognize that name.

After a moment he tore the cloth off him like it had grown fangs and bitten him. He let it drop at his feet and he kicked it away with a huff. He stomped over to where Fester had been watching this unusual display and picked him up.

“Time for bed, buddy.”

Fester settled into his human’s hold, sneaking one last glance at the curious item piled on the floor before being carried out of the room.

#cannibal sweetheart #drabble #ketamine #fester #the one where ketamine is a little bit in denial #but can't hide that shit from fester #fester about to play matchmaker cause he wants his human to be happy #don't ask me why this fic exists because I don't know

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