#scape goat

[dosesofcommonsense]

[booitislife]

Let’s Pick Apart My Life

Okay, here we go folks.

I am the only child of my parents. Dad and Mom had me.

Dad was married before and had three boys. For ease let’s call them C, E, and M.

Dad and his first wife divorced which (as with all divorces caused friction). E ended up living with his mom most of the time, M ended up living with dad, C was old enough to live on his own.

Mom was married once before as well. She had one son (let’s call him D.) Then she had an affair and had my sister, let’s call her B. She stayed with her husband and husband 1 agreed to raise B as his own. Sometime when B was 2-3 she left her first husband.

Dad and mom met and ended up pregnant with me and then got married and then came me.

None of the family really got along. Blended family? HA what is that. Then, just a year into my life dad’s son (C) dies.

C’s death causes alcoholism in dad and E moves away from the family. M decides to dislike my mom. D ends up going into the military when I turn 8. B ends up taking out her frustration on me (because she doesn’t want to be mad at our mom).

How does this all play on me, you may ask? Well, I grew up with 1 dead sibling, 2 absent siblings, and 2 siblings who were mad at their parents, but they decided they couldn’t take it out on their parents so they took it out on the product of their parents - me. I grew up very alone or being taunted, disliked, etc.

M was super nice until he realized he could not make me hate my own mother. From then on he was cold. Until dad died. Then, M was so emotionally abusive to me that I started having panic attacks every single time he would text or call me. My partner had to intervine and we ended up absolutely no contact. His children don’t know me because I am not considered a part of their family.

E took M’s side and I am not close with his kids either because M was always considered the authority.

Other side of the family?

D ended up on the other side of the country and the only times we really talk is when I initiate it. His wife is great, but even she can’t get him to talk.

B? She ended up blaming me for years because she didn’t want to be mad at our mom. She had a kid and I have seen her less than a dozen times - she’s 7. I have asked and asked and asked. It doesn’t matter. I have also had to look past the horrible things she has said to me - including when I opened up to her (the first person I told in my family) about my miscarriage and she said - “It’s for the best.” I have never gotten over that hurt. That is one of several very serious things she has done or said.

Dad is dead. Mom? I know out he her 3 children I am her 3rd favorite.

I am tired. Why did they even have me? I have nothing to contribute and my own family doesn’t care whatsoever. I am so fucking exhausted. Why am I still here?

Man, yeah, that’s my close family tree. Yay. Someone shoot me.

[scripture-pictures]

[fox0war]

'Scape the last Goat and Lamb the last Sheep

[sistarstarlydraws]

The Cult of the Lamb Goat!

Friends and mutuals were making Cult of the Lamb sonas, so I decided to join in. They told me that I am quite chaotic and mean when I play so I decided to go for the goat character!

[fictionalsownme]

keigo in my newer style since I finally watched s7!! 🧡🌟

I had sooo much fun choosing what I would headcanon/fancast his features as (peep the dimples, i like those heheh,, i just know in-universe there would be at least one fan account dedicated to them lol). My style these days is a lot more grounded in realism so it was hard finding references without an exact face to use-- kind of like a collage. I like how it turned out! I hope this fed my MHA followers & mutuals for a bit, I hath not forgotten you~~!! I really enjoyed season 7, I already know the major beats of what happens next in the manga but I haven't actually read it so I'm waiting with bated breath!!

bonus: I rambled about keigo in the tags but I have big feelings after finishing the season so it ended up long hehe (the tags on my posts are slowly becoming a notes app for fandom shower thoughts atm bruh!!)

[dreamcatcher-faux]

Very slowly getting into Cult of the Lamb and I already failed by making Ewe 😔

[allmightyscroll-swag]

CW: BLOOD, THERE'S A FETUS/TUBE BABY LITERALLY IN THE FIRST SHOT

I know I don't post my ocs here like. Ever but I worked really hard on this shit and you WILL fuckin watch it

[cotton-eyes]

Ngl I kind of hate Ford haters as much as I hate Mabel haters,

like before book of bill I’m a bit more leniant but people who after BoB are like “boo hoo your muse betrayed you, your boyfriend was a monster🥺” it’s just like did you read the book????

I firmly believe that Ford was an ass, but like ya’ll realized he was abused right?

Bill did the Sci Fi version of roofie-ing your boyfriend and mutilating his body, it wasn’t a “owo toxic yaoi” it was straight up abuse, and practically stated DV.

Not to say you can’t have fun with billford or can’t be pissed at how Ford treats everyone in his life, but I want you to at least acknowledge what gave him those traits.

If you’re going to hate at least do it with nuance.

[strunmah-mah]

There's been a lot of discussions of Kuras as a Satan figure. Which fair enough, he seems to be a fallen angel, granting knowledge to humans that causes their death is very snake in the garden etc.

But the nails through the palm is a very Christlike image.

It makes me wonder; How much of his guilt is genuinely his own, and how much is he being scapegoated for by someone else?

[moeblob]

So uh. Eventually I'll stop drawing these guys so obsessively but not today I guess.

(DND AU where it's just these two, Brent, and Paul on a life mission to annoy Chris the GM by having the pact of "we're only here for Karen's benefit")

Karen is a warlock, Right is a cleric, Paul is a paladin, and Brent is a bard (so he can use bardic inspiration on Karen).

[cynthiabaileyrug]

Roles Of Children In Dysfunctional Families

When I first started learning about narcissistic abuse, I learned that the children of narcissists were given roles in their family.  Today I want to explain them. The scapegoat is a common role among children of dysfunctional families.  The scapegoat is the child who is blamed for all of the problems in the family.  The black sheep who doesn’t fit in with the family, the scapegoat is usually…

[painsandconfusion]

Strikeout

Whumping the Whumpers - Part Thirty-two

(tw: escape attempt, broken glass, broken ceramic, gun, bullet wound, stress position, beating, shock collar, threat of death, broken bones, concussion, blood, whipping boy / scape goat, bludgeoning, forced to watch)

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Four years ago...

Ethan scurried through the house. He didn’t bother with the front door - instead, picked up a metal coat tree and hurtled it against the window. 

He didn’t have time for less. He barely had time to scoop up a kitchen rug and lay it over the shards of glass to safely clamber out the window.

He toppled to the ground in a heap, wild eyes snapping up at the small plume of dust on the horizon. He knew he didn’t have long before Crawford came home but…fuck this was closer than expected. 

Without a thought, he shoved his legs up under him, cradled the bit of porcelain to his neck, and darted off across the wide, rolling yard.

.

“E, this is crazy - will that even work??”

“Porcelain doesn’t conduct electricity. It’ll work.”

There wasn’t much Crawford left them in their little, dank basement. But the toilet was an asset Ethan had never thought to use before. 

Crawford had taken the lid of the tank - the bastard - but the rest of it was still in tact. 

Ethan had slammed his shoulder against it again and again and again until a chunk broke off of the tank, wafting back and forth through the water until it eventually settled at the bottom of the tank. 

With wild eyes and bleeding arm, he’d fished it out, blotting the fresh water off against his shorts. 

Then tucked it up under his collar, ensuring it was wide enough to fit between both of the prongs and the soft, scorched skin on his neck. 

Sharp as it was (it wasn’t bad), the coolness of the shard felt nice against the aching skin.

More importantly, it’d protect him from the shock.

��Just…be careful, okay?” Johnny stepped up to hi, fingers tracing the piece to inspect it.

“I’m always careful.” Ethan cradled Johnny’s face in his hands and leant down to press a kiss to his forehead.

.

Ethan’s legs were already burning by the time he got halfway across the yard. He had no idea what day it was. No idea how long he had belonged to Crawford - or Elias before him. No idea how long his legs had been left to atrophy, sitting useless in basements and cells. 

He ran anyway. 

Ethan couldn’t help but grin through the pain as he felt the buzz and snap of the shock collar - yet he didn’t feel a thing. Porcelain protecting him. 

He was free. He could get out and get help and they’d come back for Johnny an-

“COME THE FUCK BACK OR I’LL KILL HIM.”

A chill split down Ethan’s pine as his legs stumbled to a stop, shaking and exhausted. Breath ragged and sharply cold in the deep autumn air. 

So much agony already. 

His eyes drifted toward the skyline, eyeing skyscrapers that blurred and fogged with the distance. 

He turned back toward Crawford, pulling in another painful breath. “YOU WOULDN’T-” Trying to call his bluff.

“THINK NOT? THINK I WANT EVIDENCE LYING AROUND WHEN YOU BRING THE FUCKIN PIGS BACK HERE??”

…fuck. 

Ethan’s chest was still heaving as he turned to look at the vague outline of the city again. 

..it was far. 

Too fucking far, his legs were already shaking at a quarter mile. He was too thin. Too weak. Too..broken to make that run and not get caught. 

..and Johnny would die.

Some devil on his shoulder vaguely flickered the thought across his mind that even if Johnny died, Ethan would be free.

That thought flitted away just as quickly as it came. Unwanted and irrelevant. 

Ethan would die a thousand times for Johnny. He knew that. Down to his very soul, he knew that. 

When he looked back to Crawford, the man had a gun out now, walking briskly across the lawn toward him like a mother two inches from the end of her patience with children throwing mud at neighbors windows. 

“Get. The fuck. Back here.” Close enough he didn’t need to shout anymore, apparently.

Ethan’s mind buzzed and warped, legs begging him to run as the rest of him stayed stubbornly put. 

..then…dragged him toward Crawford. Toward the gun. Toward the house. 

Toward Johnny. 

.

“If he comes, you’ll run, right? You won’t worry about me?”

Ethan pulled in a tight breath, nuzzling his nose against Johnny’s. “That’s..the best bluff, yeah. He won’t hurt you on my behalf if I’m not here to see it. There’s no point.”

Johnny nodded, tucking his cheek against Ethan’s shoulder. Ethan pulled him closer as warm arms wrapped around his waist. Soft and simple. 

If this were just him, he could live with it. He could try to escape in his own time or bear the pain. 

But Johnny would die if Crawford kept wailing on him like he’d been. 

They needed to try.

.

Ethan came back anyway. He’d barely flinched when Crawford shot him in the leg for good measure - ensuring he couldn’t change his mind and run again. It was point blank, too. The moment Ethan had stepped up to him, the gun lowered - seemingly a good thing - then went off. 

Because of course it did.

Because Crawford was a dick. 

The pain didn’t hit him right away. Not the way it should. 

Body shocked by the sudden change, it felt more like a fist to his thigh than penetration. 

But the searing, aching wrongness had set in all the same and Crawford forced him back into the house, muscles shifting and pulling against each other around the bullet. 

Ethan refused to give him the satisfaction of a limp. 

It was going to hurt like a bitch anyway. 

By the time he shoved Ethan down the basement steps - his leg didn’t hold up for that one, he fell freely down the stairs and cracked his head against the cement with a dazed groan - Johnny was already anxiously stepped up to the stairs, hands clasped against his chest with eyes wild with fear and worry. “E-”

Ethan winced as Johnny’s cool fingers pressed against his head where it’d hit. Trying to get his mind to catch up properly. Trying to shake off the daze. 

“Forget about him - front and center, boy.” Crawford’s heavy steep creaked down the stairs after him - planting onto Ethan’s leg as he went. 

The pain ripped up through him, feeling it fully this time without the consciousness to distract himself. A wheezing groan crackled out Ethan’s throat at the pain, and he hazily tried to curl up and away from the pressure. 

But it was gone in moments. 

Fingers wound into Johnny’s hair, followed by a yelp as he was pulled away, Ethan’s fingers catching against Johnny’s. Trying to keep him away from the threat. 

It didn’t work. 

Ethan squeezed his eyes shut tight and forced himself up to sitting. Almost. Kind of. 

He was swayed to the side, legs bent the other way and both arms braced against the floor as he tried to force the pain and swirling nausea back. 

“D-ont-” His voice sounded so much weaker than he wanted, and he cursed himself for not watching his fucking head as he fell. He didn’t have time for a concussion right now-

“You know the rules.”

.

"I love you..you know that, right?"

"..I know." He knew. But the words still felt stale. It felt like goodbye.

Johnny's cheek was so soft under Ethan's thumb. He barely noticed the bruises there anymore.

"I love you, too."

.

Ethan hadn’t even registered that Crawford had Johnny tied already - arms above his head and dangling from a rafter - toes barely brushing the ground now. Didn’t notice it, at least, until Johnny let out a gasping choke of air, voice sucked away by the hit as a bat slammed against his leg.

A bat.

A…bat???

Ethan squeezed the stars from his eyes once again, focusing better - it was a bat. 

No punching or kicking this time, he was using tools. Crawford never used tools - preferred a proper, traditional beating where he could feel ribs crack under his knuckles and feel flesh shift. It wasn’t about the damage - it was about catharsis. 

But this?? A fucking bat? 

Damage. 

This was about damage.

Ethan’s eyes were wide and desperate as he realized that, trying to drag himself closer as Johnny’s broken, strained scream echoed against the walls after the wood snapped against his leg. 

“Dont-” Ethan dragged himself closer. “D-don-”

“Shut up-! You know the fucking rules.”

Ethan fucks up? Johnny gets hurt. 

He knew the rules.

Still, Ethan found his hand wrapped around Crawford’s ankle, trying to plead with him.

The bat found Ethan’s skull next. 

And everything went black.

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(tags: @prisonerwhump @whumpawink @mabledonut @heathenwhump @paleassprince @happy-little-sadist @wormwriting @distinctlywhumpthing @whump-cafe @jo-doe-seeking-inspo @azayta  @batfacedliar-yetagain @there-will-always-be-blood @siren-of-agony @whumpworld @bandages-andobsessions @deltaxxk @whumpasaurus101 @pickywhumpreader @whumpberry-cookie @morning-star-whump @nailevislev @throwawaywhumper @the-mourning-star @d-cs @pigeonwhumps @hold-back-on-the-comfort @suspicious-whumping-egg @snakebites-and-ink @whumpedydump @orphans-parent @whumplr-reader)

As always, lmk if you want to be added to the tag list!

[ysolt]

God I haven’t played endwalker but god I wanna know why you have issues with it

Dog shit fucking pacing, flawed political assumptions making the premise for a lot of the doomed worlds in later parts of the story, the entire garlemant segment where you make buddy buddy with the fascists and the Hitler youth julius and just an overall sense that they scrambled to come up with what the final days actually caused leaving it terrible disconnected and contrived from everything else. Just didn't feel like they planned it through and waited until the last moment to make something up. And only incidentally a result of that cultures issues instead of a direct cause of it. They really didn't want to critique the ancients too hard and ended up painting them mostly right. This could have happened to any society because the problem is mostly external even if the trigger was internal. But again not inherent to the ancients

[nomsfaultau]

[opening excerpts from the sbi scp au au where Philza is a Foundation worker] Philza was a loyal employee.

His job was important, and he excelled at it. He did good in the world, saving lives in his own way. He wasn’t particularly high ranking, but had built up a decently respectable position over a few years at his site. When higher level employees butted into his work, he usually got along with them as long as their decisions were logical. Quality work, accountability, and a general easy rapport with coworkers all led to him being a good employee.

That wasn’t what made him loyal, though.

There’s a difference between a job and a duty, or simple capital concerns and moral obligation. There’s another distinction between being private and being secretive, and another again between a man who doesn’t discuss his professional life and a man forbidden to do so. A rift between a man scarcely 25 who was worried he may need a will and one who knew he did. A line between observation and experimentation, a thin one he’d seen many cross to join him. 

Afterall, there’s a difference between humans and monsters.

Oh, Philza knew the moniker was SCP, but he held no delusions to what they were. At the end of the day, Philza was a loyal employee because he knew the danger, knew he stood between it and the safety of the world. Philza worked hard to protect humanity from the threat it knew not of. How could he not?

Philza was a loyal employee.

(The operative word, of course, being ‘was’.)

————————————————

Anyway if you want tiny Tommy, reluctant dad Phil, cute moments between Philza and Kristin (gasp! I can write romance!?), deconstructing how the Foundation utilizes fear, surveillance, and weaponization of anomalies against their own employees to maintain its fascist regime, and Tommy giving Philza ptsd for a change, this one shot is for you.

[afterartist]

I’d like to remind everyone that my page is a Cluster B safe space

I will not accept any bigoted views on mental illnesses in general,

That included, Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Antisocial Personality Disorder and Histrionic Personality Disorder

If you disagree leave my page