#sashene rambles

[sasheneskywalker]

today i woke up and half of the posts on my dash were jason stans complaining about tim (& tim stans) and the other half were tim stans complaining about jason (& jason stans). i have a feeling something might have happened lol

it's hard existing on bat tumblr as both jason and tim stan and jaytim shipper 😔

[necrotic-nephilim]

thank you for the tag, @sasheneskywalker!!!

rules: answer and tag nine people you want to get to know better and catch up with.

favorite color: it changes regularly, but currently, a dusty/greyish purple

last song: Maps by The Front Bottoms

currently reading:

Butcher & Blackbird by Brynne Weaver is my current fiction read and i *hate* it with my entire being. don't read it.

Postcolonial Astrology: Reading the Planets through Capital, Labor, & Power by Alice Sparkly Kat is my current non-fiction read and so far, it's very good

i'm reading a lot of comics at the moment, but my main read is Manhunter (2004) which so far, is very good, i highly recommend. i'm also planning to read Midnighter (2007) and Black Widow (2014).

currently watching:

The Acolyte has been my most recent fixation so that's just on loop rewatching over and over in the background. a lot

i've been watching Pennyworth which is far better than i expected it to be, i'm really enjoying it

i also started Invincible, which i've been enjoying

idk if it counts but i've rewatched Madame Web a concerning number of times in the past few days.

currently craving: i'd kill for an Italian Cream Soda from tea2go rn

coffee or tea: tea. i used to be a big coffee person in my teens but my chronic illness doesn't like caffeine and it *really* doesn't like coffee so i just drink tea now, but i do love tea

hobby to try: the unrealistic hobby i'd like to get into a fanfiction binding, but that takes materials and resources i do *not* currently have. i think a more realistic answer is i've been meaning to get into marvel comics more.

current au: tbh the main AU i'm working on is a Lance Brunner-centric Post-Crisis fic where i'm completely rewriting his origins to make his death as Robin more significant but still something no one talks about, leading to the ressurection of Jason also reviving Lance and Jason going on his little spree, having no idea he's not the only dead Robin. i've figured out all of the backstory and how i want to characterize Lance, but the actual plot of the fic i'm still working out. i'm leaning toward Lance/Dick as a ship, but i haven't decided. i have so many notes and ideas though and i think it's funny to take a random one-off character from a random 60s comic and actually turn him into something substantial and how he'd shape the Batfamily. trust me i'm so close to infodumping about it here everyday.

i'm also working on a *really* messed up unhealthy Damian/Tim fic, where Damian purposefully breaks the timeline so Tim was never Robin and Damian was the third Robin instead. but when Bruce "dies" Damian realizes he has no idea where to start with finding Bruce so he has to go to a civilian!Tim for help, who has no idea the timeline was changed or that he was ever Robin in a different world. it's gonna be fun and fucked up and full of Damian's jealousy complex over Tim.

i don't know if i can come up with nine whole people to tag for this since i'm still new here but i can try: @searchforahero @divine-dominion @kevin-day-is-bi @kerakeriza @deepwithintheabyss

@maryshellyswife @alicemaem @justmyshittyspace @sandmanwhore and yeah that's all i got.just tagging some mutuals/ppl i see on my posts a lot!!!

[sasheneskywalker]

Trick or treat!

i was researching how to create improvised explosives for a jason-centric fic and stumbled upon a declassified usa army's improvised munitions handbook from 1969. the easiest explosive to make that i've found can be done with only sugar, salt, steel pipe, tape, wax and a blasting cap. i didn't know what a no. 8 commercial blasting cap was so i googled it and according to wikipedia: "A number 8 test blasting cap is one containing 2 grams of a mixture of 80 percent mercury fulminate and 20 percent potassium chlorate, or a blasting cap of equivalent strength." naturally, i got curious and wondered if you can make mercury fulminate and potassium chlorate yourself and the answers is yes! there are tutorials on youtube about it (1) (2).

anyway, i'm probably on some kind of watchlist now lol

[sasheneskywalker]

tag game

tagged by @disniq :)

last song: DOROTHY - Gun In My Hand

currently watching: tv shows, anime and video essays. too many at once.

last movie: i rarely watch movies, so probably Atomic Blonde

sweet/spicy/savory: sweet

relationship status: in a poly relationship with my two girlfriends <3

current obsession: dc comics lol

last thing i searched online: japanese baby names. i'm making ocs for anime fics and i needed some references.

no pressure tagging

@devilbonesofmetal, @jasonsbruce, @bestangelofall,

@red-handed-tamarin, @freedvmrouge, @beemotionpicture

[sasheneskywalker]

thank you for the tag, @the-name-of-the-rose <3

rules: answer and tag nine people you want to get to know better and catch up with.

favorite color: black 🖤

last song: Ruelle - The World We Made

currently reading: Revolting Prostitutes: The Fight for Sex Workers' Rights by Juno Mac and Molly Smith, Mistborn: The Well of Ascension by Brandon Sanderson and a lot of DC comics

currently watching: Watchmen, Arcane, Good Omens, The Boys

currently craving: i'm always craving chocolate lol

coffee or tea: tea. i drink huge amounts of tea every day. coffee has weird effects on my brain, it can give me a headache or fill me with boundless energy or immediately put me to sleep, depending on the positions of the stars and the phase of the moon, i guess. i only sometimes drink it for the taste.

hobby to try: i'm learning knitting and crocheting right now.

current au: too many to count. i think the most interesting one is my omegaverse. i'm writing a universal "omegaverse worldbuilding" doc for all my fics in an effort to conceptualize an internally coherent omegaverse world, similar to our real world. it currently has 17 pages and that's like 10 percent of what i want to include. i'll post a link to it when i finish it.

tagging: @necrotic-nephilim, @disniq, @red-handed-tamarin, @chejuu, @there-must-be-a-lock,

@itsnyxkvistad, @jzbnee, @paprikadotmp4, @freedvmrouge (if you want!)

[sasheneskywalker]

i was reading an academic paper as part of my research for an essay on incestuous relationships for my philosophy class and it's honesty very thought provoking. i'm posting here the most interesting passages. i'd love to discuss it with someone, feel free to message me or reblog with your thoughts :)

[sasheneskywalker]

now that bnha and jjk are finished, i really need to read the entire manga and catch up on the anime lol

[sasheneskywalker]

10 Characters, 10 Fandoms

rules: list your ten favorite characters from ten separate fandoms, then tag ten people!

thank you for the tag, @the-name-of-the-rose! <3

Jason Todd

i'd die for him. i'd kill for him. i'd cradle him gently in my arms and kiss him stupid.

Andy | Andromache of Scythia

very hot, very competent, very pleasant. watching her fight was a spiritual experience.

Paul Atreides

he's so pretty... i don't care he's a horrible dictator, just look at his gorgeous curly hair!

Uchiha Sasuke

sasuke was right 2k24

Dazai Osamu

i want to follow him around with a notepad and study his behavior.

Gojo Satoru

his eyes... you can get lost in them... he's so beautiful when he utterly demolishes people with his abilities.

Dabi | Todoroki Touya

justice for dabi 2k24

Mara Jade

i'd love to travel around the galaxy with her and luke. she is such a cool character.

Natasha Romanoff

i want her to teach me her combat skills so bad.

Ash Lynx

he deserved a happy ending. i want to give him a hug.

no pressure tags: @darknesswillfall, @merrymerryquitecontrary, @sheepishmastectomy, @disniq, @red-handed-tamarin

[sasheneskywalker]

am i the only person who has never struggled with their queer identity?

i was thinking about it recently and i don't remember ever being ashamed, scared, angry or sad about being bisexual, nonbinary, grayaromantic, grayasexual and polyamorous. (yes, i use that many labels. it makes sense in my head.) i had unrestricted access to the interent from a pretty young age (11) and i discovered what a sexual orientation was after entering more english/american spaces and reading fanfiction when i was around 13 years old. i've just read the definitions and went, "yeah, i'm bisexual. why would anyone limit themselves to loving only one gender?" and that was it. my only frame of reference about queer people was fanfics and cool people i've seen online. my parents never talked about lgbtq+ issues (neither in a positive nor in negative light) and i didn't know anyone who was queer in real life, so you could say i was a blank slate when it came to any preconceived notions or biases (of course we live in cisheteronormative society which probably influenced my views on a subconscious level but i'm just taking about being consciously aware about something here.)

it was similar with realizing i was nonbinary, grayaromantic, grayasexual and polyamorous. i've read the definitions, comments made by people identifying that way, some research papers and books and came to the conclusion that these labels fit me. no angst anywhere.

i came out to my family pretty much immediately when my brother asked me if i was interested in any boys in middle school and i replied with full indignation that if he had to ask about it, he should also ask about any girls i might be interested in. my mother was there too. i don't think any of them took me seriously considering my age (i was 14) and the fact that i had to have many more conversations with my mother about being bisexual (and later nonbinary, grayaromantic, grayasexual and polyamorous) before she believed me in some way and even now she still thinks it's just a "phase" and that i'm "confused" or "just looking for attention" and that my girlfriends are only my good friends (but she still supports my relationship and tries very hard not to be outright homophobic/transphobic). my brother realized like 6 years later and asked me if i really was queer and seemed surprised when i told him i was. i still don't know what my father thinks. i told him i had a boyfriend when i was 15 and i told him i had two girlfriends when i was 20 and his reaction was exactly the same: nodding his head and saying "okay". he sometimes uses slurs but also supported me during a project i was doing on being nonbinary and bought me a book written by a trans scholar on christmas.

and i've never done any official coming outs either. in most friend groups, it comes out naturally that i'm queer when we're getting to know each other and it has never been a problem. i've never been met with a negative reaction. (it's worth noting that most of my irl friends are from middle class families, live in big cities and went to very good schools).

and it's not that i'm not aware about queerphobia existing in our society. i read books written by queer people and i read histories of lgbtq+ communities (and it's often pretty bleak). our country is one of the most homophobic countries in europe. the previous government of our country said that "lgbt ideology" and "gender ideology" are a threat to our nation and should be eliminated. i had close queer friends whom i supported when their families and friends didn't accept them. but it all feels one step removed from me.

i can walk alone at 3am around my city (the capital of poland) as a female presenting person with a rainbow handbag and flag pins in a party outfit and nobody ever bothers me. i went to a pride parade this year and there weren't any counter protests, the police were chill and nothing horrible happened. and despite talking with people who used some passive aggressive remarks and weren't completely accepting, i've basically never experienced violent or threatening queerphobia in my life.

i guess it's just interesting to me how much my experiences differ from common queer narratives i observe in media and in real life around me and how my upbringing shaped who i am today.

[sasheneskywalker]

tagged by @necrotic-nephilim and @melodyatlas, thank you <3

(i know absolutely nothing about league of legends, i just like the songs lol)

no pressure tagging: @disniq, @bestangelofall, @laufire

[sasheneskywalker]

i still can't believe i'm in a relationship with two gals that i met on a batman fanfiction discord server <3

[sasheneskywalker]

i really don't want to or feel knowledgeable enough to self-diagnose but i've been reading scientific papers and many other sources on the subject of a certain personality disorder for the last two days and 90% of the symptoms and descriptions fit me perfectly 😭

(it's schizoid personality disorder lol)

[sasheneskywalker]

star wars was my first fandom and it's slowly sucking me back in. i have around 50 pages of notes about the nature of the force and jedi and sith traditions and philosophies that i've been collecting over the years. i need to tidy them up and maybe post them somewhere.

[sasheneskywalker]

i'm a gender chameleon and pronouns are part of my aesthetic

[sasheneskywalker]

about me

who are you?

an ordinary media enjoyer, wandering from one fandom to the next. an avid reader and writer of fanfiction. a sociology major. three unfathomable creatures in a trench coat.

what fandoms are you in?

harry potter, percy jackson, star wars, mcu, dc comics, sherlock, supernatural, merlin, arrowverse, naruto, my hero academia, death note, code geass, steins;gate, yuri on ice, owari no seraph, banana fish, bungou stray dogs, durarara, jujutsu kaisen, dune, disco elysium, the old guard, and more. 

what's your ao3?

SasheneSkywalker.

can i message you?

yes. i’m always down to talk about characters, ships, fics, ideas and general fandom stuff. send me a tumblr ask, dm me or find me on discord.

do you accept fic prompts/requests?

yes, although there’s no guarantee i’ll actually write them.

when will you post/update one of your fics?

hopefully before the world-ending apocalypse begins.

what events are you running?

dc trans week, rainbow exchange, enemies to lovers exchange, jason todd-centric exchange, dc prompt meme.

do you ship [insert a ship name here]?

if they could be described as "complex and toxic" then yes.

when will your wife return from war?

which wife and which war?

why do you make so many lists?

i just like collecting and categorizing stuff ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

where can i find stuff you've written and plan to write?

here are my creations and here are projects i'm currently working on.

can i get an invite to the jason todd discord server?

here you go!

masterlist of posts

meta rec lists

jason todd meta list

dick grayson meta list

cassandra cain meta list

politics, philosophy, and superheroes - video essays

sex, love, fiction, and fandom - video essays

books and articles about about comics, superheroes, dc and batman

fic rec lists

dc/marvel crossover fic recs

jason todd-centric fic recs

dc poly ships fic recs

brujay fic recs

brudick fic recs

sladick explicit fic recs

sladick mature fic recs

batfamily fic recs that will make you laugh

batfamily fic recs where someone from the batfamily kills a person (or jason kills the joker)

batfamily fic recs where members of the batfamily deal with their experiences with sexual assault

batfamily fic recs which are told through unusual formatting

batfamily fic recs where original characters are main characters

batfamily fic recs which are told from an outsider’s perspective

batfamily fic recs where the main character is transgender or non-binary

batfamily fic recs where the main character is asexual or aromantic

weekly fic recs

weekly batman/dc fic recs tag

tags directory

tagging pattern: #[fandom], #[character], #[ship], #[category]

tagging categories: #meta, #fanart, #fanfic, #fandom, #shipping, #fic rec, #book, #book quotes, #book recs, #comic recs, #podcast recs, #writing, #idea, #bookmark, #resources, #wild tumblr, #humor, #negativity, #society, #science, #ask meme

personal tags: #sashene creates, #sashene’s diary, #sashene answers, #sashene rambles, #sashene's drawer of wips, #sashene commentates

(i don't tag nsfw posts and rarely use trigger warnings. consider this blog "not rated" and "creator chose not to use archive warnings".)

[sasheneskywalker]

i'm completely serious. when i made my first fandom account, i put 'they/xem' as my pronouns because they fit the vibe i was going for (blue, waves, blurry, stars). i changed fandoms and remodeled my account (purple, flowers, galaxies, smooth) and i thought 'she/they' suited my image better. now, after i got more involved in fandom and started posting my own works on my profile (red, sharp, acerbic, simple) i added 'he' so my pronouns are 'she/he/they'. on my other discord account, which i use to play games with random people, i have 'he/they' in bio. in real life i mostly use 'she/him'.

my haircut is designed so that i can style it to be more masculine or feminine depending on my mood. sometimes i like to be perceived as a man and sometimes as a woman, so i try to express that in the way i dress. often, i don't care which gender i'm seen as, but occasionally i have a burning need for people to view me as a man. sporadically, i even want people to be unable to tell which gender they should recognize me as at all. it also depends on the occasion. when i go to a wedding, i almost always wear a suit but when i go to a party i wear short skirts, crop tops, fishnets and a face full of make-up. i blend both styles or dress androgynously for queer events. if i go to a job interview, i intentionally choose to present myself in a feminine way. when i meet up with several of my male friends to play board games, i appear very masculine.

i don't know why i like it that way, but it's interesting for me to think about it.

i'm a gender chameleon and pronouns are part of my aesthetic