#same ol spiel

[bearsbeetsbeskar]

personal ramblings

life has been feeling rough lately, and even though some days it feels like I have a better handle on things, sometimes it hits me all at once.

taking care of a family member who has a terminal illness is hard. taking care of and supporting 2 family members who have said same illness is even harder, especially when it is your mother and grandmother. it feels like myself and my family members are literally being pulled thin by the obligations of life, and family, and being there for one another, and sometimes I forget that I'm only one person.

I also think I'm more affected than I'd like to let on cause even coming on here and trying to read fic is overwhelming. It's all starting to feel the same, to the point where I'm numb to it. Forget writing, I haven't had much inspiration to write anything at all in the last couple weeks. I feel like the mojo is gone for now. Not only that but the fixation around engagement of fics on here is starting to get to me in a way that I don't like. I don't care about notes or reblogs on my shit, but sometimes it feels like the overarching theme or purpose of putting content out on this site, and some people are downright obsessed with it, and it's scary. I try not to get sucked into it but somedays it needles it's way into my brain.

I don't really know what the point of this post was, but I feel like I'm getting more and more stressed, more cabin fever with being at home, more burnout with taking care of my mother and grandmother and it's all a bit much, and tumblr doesn't really feel like a safe space anymore that I want to come to in order to escape and shit.

I look forward to starting school in September, that's one silver lining I can appreciate. A change of pace, change of scenery and being able to learn again.

If you read this far or you still follow me for whatever reason, I appreciate you! And thank you for sticking around.

-nicole 🌹

[agayconcept]

.

[sgiandubh]

It's the same because you still cannot answer the basic question, why? Why hide for 11 years? Why would she fake a husband and child for the past 9 of those 11 years? When I came to the show in 2019, I saw their names without a clue who they were. The show had been aired since 2014. No one in my circle, or job was talking about them or the show. When I brought it up no one knew who, what, I was talking about. I am in the key demographic of OL. According to you and people like you, they and he were so popular, and had had an image of available Sam to sell to get him into big roles, so he couldn't be with his costar AND it was to promote the show. Well 5 years into the show, it was a fringe show, and 11 years later they are D list and C list actors, not well known. Why not only keep a relationship hidden, but go to the extreme lengths you claim to keep it hidden? It is not logical. You are not logical. The thngs that make you go hmmm are not real to fuel your need to keep your idea of Jaime and Claire being real, which they are not. Wish I could be sorry for you, but considering how nasty and stalkers you and she and people like you have been, actors and fans to keep your fantasy going, it's time for your rude awakening.

Dear Why Anon,

Honey - I know exactly who the fuck you are. You keep on asking the same cretin questions in ALL the comment threads of Mordor, over and over and over again. I think you are either a very bored housewife or a 15 year old nerd.

That child you are referring to is 3 years old, not 9. Get your facts together before talking crap with arrogant confidence.

This blogger never maintained S and C were married. You bark at the wrong (well-informed) door, because you are desperately, tragically stupid, like that.

Nobody from the shipper side has ever been nasty to SC and the OL cast. No shipper has ever stalked them (I am a lawyer, I know perfectly well what I am saying and I am talking from a legal point of view, because I know you mean 'covfefe pics' - you are Nobody). May I also remind you no legal action has ever been taken against anyone of our side? Can you say the same about your luminaries, as far as being nasty and stalking, including online? If anything, it is you, people who harass C every time she meets fans, with your stupid questions about T. You are treated with white lies every single time and I think it is only fair.

You will not have any answers from me, because you are an idiot with an empty agenda. However, you will have a question, the same as the one you asked: why? If you are so sure of your spiel, why do you go berserk every single time you are challenged by facts you apparently are so quick to dismiss?

[oscconfessions]

Idk if this really counts as a confession, I just wish Gelatin gave Four the good ol' "treat others the way you want to be treated" spiel. "You were mean, but we were mean too," could've been "We were mean because YOU were mean." Four's breakdown is over people not liking him, so now they'll have a choice of treating everybody better so everyone likes him, or stay the same and have nobody care for him... And if he chooses to better himself, they work at the tpot hotel as community service YAYY HAPPY ENDING (´∇｀)

But nah, welcome back, White Diamond. Maybe I'm expecting too much from an object show...

.

[laylawatermelon]

Now all we need is a queer club scene a la lone Star.

Buck would absolutely flourish, henren would be flirting, Eddie would be sitting at the bar doing a beer watching Buck like a hawk and sometimes smiling, Tommy would be in the void floating (sorry babe I'm a Buddie 4 lifer), and for a lil pizzazz Maddie and Chimney also go.

(it evolved into a tiny fic 🥺if you wanna read you can🥺)

ao3 link :

Ravi is probably there somewhere with someone in the VIP section looking down at them both happy but also a bit worried to see them.

(he's been working with them for a while now he knows the rumors of that many collective jinx powers they hold)

He sends them drinks periodically and they all wonder if someone is about to get a sugar daddy and then realize they're all couples so who's the couple who's getting a third?

Hen has her hands permanently glued to her wife's side and her head in her neck. She's murmuring sweet nothings and Karen giggles it away as she rubs any part of her that's closest to her and sips her drink.

Chimney and Maddie chat as they become a two-headed, four-limbed creation that smells of tequila, love, and laughter.

Maddie is constantly getting compliments on her shiny outfit and nails and ends up beside Buck periodically through the night, both of them like radiant sunlight to others.

Chimney also magically appears next to her almost instantaneously but vanishes and returns with drinks for his friends eventually chatting up the biggest guys he can on their gym regimen and suggesting they buy a calendar to support the new Asian Sex Symbol.

Of course, they sell a few copies.

Buck is the crown Jewel of the drag queens who are all shapes, sizes, and identities getting off of a show to have a nice night out.

He's marvelous and praises their outfits before quickly getting sucked into impromptu makeup and drag lessons, cards for shows, drunken histories, sexuality stories, and good ole fun lip-syncing.

And of course, since he's a bright star who everyone loves, many people begin their hunt.

A quick wink, a lingering smile, a hand on his lower back that lingers as long as a guy slides past him.

Okay, that's it.

Eddie orders another two beers, checking his phone for the babysitter's update before pocketing it.

He slides up behind Buck sliding a beer in his hand and resting his head on his shoulder his hand coming up to his waist.

The girls immediately gush about the two saying there are Two Hot Firefighters ready to put out their fire and Eddie bursts out in laughter.

They begin to fawn over him next complimenting his jawline and face suggesting he go into modelling or movies.

One of them says it's a waste but they'd be all fired up if they see him covered in soot. Another asks if he's on the same calendar as the sexy Asian guy.

Buck pouts telling them no and he's the focus again.

The drag queens then launch into a spiel about fire safety and if they could do a lecture at a show or help them.

Buck ends up video calling Bobby at the request and he and Athena are laying in bed amused as they watch him stumble through his words before a crowd of colorful queens squeeze into the frame.

He assumes them he'll think about it and the comment on Athena's beauty before the call is cut.

Bobby turns to Athena after the call and she laughs. "Your boy is always getting into trouble." He kisses her forehead softly. "We should go next time." "Let's."

Later that night as Christopher's finally dozing off, his phone slipping out of his hand he jolts at the sound of the front door bursting open.

Harry and Denny freeze on the phone, their faces both lit up by their computer screen, "What was that?"

Chris reaches for his glasses and slips them on staying quiet.

He listens again and relaxes as he hears giggles and shushes.

He rolls his eyes and pulls his covers over his head. "It's my dads."

The shuffling gets louder and he groans softly as his door is knocked on before it's pushed open.

Eddie grins down at his son's lying form and stumbles over as gracefully as he can. Buck is in the kitchen filling two (plastic) cups with water and shakily walking to his room.

Eddie walks to the left of his bed and kneels down resting his head on his arm.

He pats his head suddenly emotional, "I love you so much you know that?"

Chris frowns at his distressed tone but also notices the softness in his touch.

They watch him and Buck tiptoe in to hand Eddie a cup and rest his on a nightstand.

"We should probably let him sleep, okay babe?"

Eddie drinks from his cup smiling and pats Chris' head one last time. "Okay. Night son."

As they're leaving Buck sticks his head back in, "By the way your phone light is still asking through the blanket. Go to bed, Chris."

Harry and Denny burst out laughing and Chris promptly hangs up. He closes his eyes with a smile on his face as his dads fall into bed sloppily in the next room, leaving their problems for themselves tomorrow. 

[mirror-to-the-past]

So.... I bolted to the finish line of Dream Drop as I had nothing else to do today.

I am still collecting many thoughts, sentiments, attempts at analysis, etc, as I always do, but this game just had a lot to offer so I'm still weeding through the freshly tilled flowerbed that is my brain at the moment. Holy mother of run-on sentences (you're gonna see a lot of those).

First off, I wanna thank this game for doing so much for Sora and Riku's characters. The inverse development they had through the course of the plot was really interesting to follow, actually, and none of it's out of nowhere!

Since KH1, Sora's had the repression subplot and embracing the strength of others as his own. Here, he tried to do the same, but with everything that's happened to him since, all of which he doesn't even necessarily remember, and all of the emotions and memories he's been touched with and made more and more aware of- he's on shaky ground and the same ol' methods don't fit like they used to! Understandable! And Xehanort/13 Darkness gang just feeds into that. He expands on Sora's questioning of his identity, suggests the lack of validity of his emotions. Everything that could be used to describe Sora in a positive light in wake of what's happened to him, he finds a negative spin on it to really dig at Sora's core:

'You're confused about the direction your life has taken? Hm, wonder how much of you is even real. Your emotions? Memories? Could be fabrications. Or someone else's. Who knows...'

'Your heart is a refuge for lost souls, hoping to find a new future? Nah, screw that. Your heart's a prison. Your very existence binds people, Sora. And of course, you just love holding people back.'

'Aw, you follow where your heart leads? Cute. People's feelings have never led them astray before, huh? Why don't you just keep being a precious little idiot though, it works great for us.'

Xigbar particularly, was brutal as always. Loved the scenes with him and Sora in The World that Never Was. So well crafted. He towers over him, gets all up in Sora's business and you can see how uncomfortable Sora is. He pokes directly at Sora's two biggest insecurities:

Weakness; being incapable and helpless.

Not being wanted/needed, or dragging others down.

He goes on his whole spiel where he specifically highlights how Sora's pretty much leftovers. He acts like he's a good for nothing- "As if the Keyblade would choose a wimp like you." And childish for simply feeling the pain of others: "Oh... thank you, Sora's heart, for pushing him right into our clutches. Aren't hearts great? Steer us wrong every time." (Love that line) And Sora figures out that Nobodies have the capability of essentially learning to gain their own heart (CALLED IT, YES- BUT ALSO 😭 you poor guys. I think every party that could have benefitted either didn't care or didn't figure it out.), only to be further disparaged by Xemnas essentially being like 'Yeah, and then they got manipulated anyway, hah. Just like you.' Just two grown ass men bullying and gaslighting a teenage boy to heighten his insecurities. Because "possession" just seems to be a symbol for one losing themselves.

Xehanort as a character just gives those vibes of an individual who takes, takes, and breaks someone down until they don't feel like themselves anymore, becoming an extension of their manipulator. He preys upon vulnerability and lack of self assurance and it's so good, hah. So, that's the reading I find most appropriate for his thematic relevance, in relation to KH's continuous crisis of what makes up an identity. I mean, just look at how Xehanort describes the others they were considering as a dark vessel- Riku's "immune to the darkness," in other words, immune to obfuscation/has more solid connections. Roxas was considered as too driven, assured in his place in Sora's heart when he forged his own trial-by-fire path. Both people that came to peace with themselves and what they wanted through hardship, one way or another. Now, I'm not saying Sora hasn't felt hardship, but when your theme is "repression," he's up against amnesia, feelings of others encroaching on his own, and a lack of self evaluation. He has more of himself in others, at the moment, and that's leaving him vulnerable.

So, you can only imagine how Sora feels at the game's conclusion, denied a rank of Keyblade Master, those words lingering in his mind as one of the most recent things he's heard, near death(?) experience, and Sora had been filled in I'm sure on how Riku was endangering himself for Sora's sake. I'm sure he feels super great about all that.

(His "What do you want me to see?!" line after Roxas disappeared... haha... I'm well.)

Meanwhile, Riku. His whole arc was the polar opposite! By the end of this game, he was the most self assured than we've seen him the whole series! 🎉 Hooray! At least someone gets to be happy! :'D

But for real, *wow.* Personal quip, I doubt I need to go heavily into the queer connotations of Riku's journey to easier vulnerability and self acceptance, especially in this game, because I'm sure anyone who takes time to read this can probably see it, but wow. The way he learned to change his reflexes and actions throughout the course of the story in a number of small, meaningful ways was so sweet. It was cheesy, sure, but him openly laughing with the other teens in Traverse Town. Him admitting to the nature of his insecurities to help another, and then getting comforted by Esmeralda in return, who assured him it was understandable to have walls around his heart/keep parts of himself separate from the world when he was still unsure and figuring out his feelings (lines that drive me crazy, 2023). Him rolling his eyes at the "All for one and one for all," motto before reflecting on Sora's openness and inclusion, and deciding to give it a try, himself. So many little things where he learned to laugh and reminisce freely and it reminded me of the snippet of how he was when he was younger in BBS, which, speaking of- all those steps towards healthiness made it so that throughout the entire game, unlike CoM, where he fought in darkness with self hate, and Days, where he lost himself completely, he never battled with notable levels of internal darkness to try to win anything. He found his strength to protect the things that matter, like he always wanted, by being himself, unapologetically.

...I wish I played this game in middle school or something. Alas.

(Also Riku Dream Eater theory was a go, boys! Also like how there was no explanation other than *X. Heartless voice* "Yes adopted son of darkness, you were down so bad you changed species to protect Sora from bad dreams as soon as you subconsciously felt suspicious vibes." And that's all we're gonna fucking get, so deal with it *mic drop*. 😂 Was pleasantly surprised Sora's clothes were also plot relevant, and I feel better about disliking them now. They branded him, eugh.)

Speaking of being yourself, but perhaps being too many of yourselves, in this case, here's my obligatory "cries at the endgame" sentiments. This one was less hype than the others, but punched me directly in the heart instead. Oh. My. GOD? That whole sequence of Riku diving into Sora's heart (with all of his memories floating past? Lord I'd be so embarrassed if I was ever in such a situation- it's so personal, y'know?), entering its innermost reaches, answering the questions... holy guacamole guys I think I left a part of me on those sunset beaches, there. That whole scene was a KH1 reference with the questions (I answered in terms of how I best thought Riku would answer), Riku and Xion's sitting placements on the Paopu tree (also Riku saw Xion as Sora *fist pumps in sad success*), and I'm almost *certain,* especially since it was right before "What are you most afraid of" that my theory of Riku overhearing the Sora&Kairi dock convo in the first game was valid. I mean, just look at the dude's face after staring out at the sunset. M'boy Riku looked downright melancholy and I trust KH microexpressions with my life. (And speaking of microexpressions, Sora's smile looked suspiciously forced when congratulating Riku on becoming a Master, poor fella. He was trying so hard to be a good sport about everything with that messy situation.)

Dream Drop Distance did so much with how we're finally having all of the separate plot points converge and it was so surprisingly satisfying. Sora seems to be picking up more about Naminé, he's aware of Xion and is trying to figure out who she is. Roxas seems to be losing himself or doubting who he is outside Sora and aaaahh?? No?! My beautiful boy, don't do this, we'll get you out! I miss Axel, but we've got Lea, who keeps getting deadnamed (he got chosen as a Wielder by the universe for his troubles). I want to see more of Ienzo, he endears me, especially when he's told "shut up nerd" by Lea. Foreshadowing about Ventus (when he smiled upon feeling Sora's happiness with the Dream Eaters post-credits, something got me in my core about imagining Ventus experiencing all of Sora's joys and hurts while he grew up. I wonder if he'll feel any affection for Sora's friends as if they were his own, as well.). We finally got Ansem's data he implanted within Sora. Kairi is being brought back into the plot since KH2!! HYPE! *On my hands and knees*

Anyway this game was good. I probably have more to say because there was just so much but yeah.

Edit: Almost forgot the thing I groaned at my TV for earlier! ^_^

*ahem*

They composed a Heartsong and each of their hearts play a piece of a Duet version of Dearly Beloved, which is the Title Theme for the Entire Franchise, and Definitely Doesn't have any romantic connotations as a phrase or anything. Also they Definitely do not have a Two-Part-One-Whole Keyblade that isn't (so far, I'll catch up) explained, and is a phenomena not previously noted throughout the games, that has a Paopu Fruit hanging off the end.

Man, all this stuff tuckers an epic gamer out. Think I'll go replay Hades, Stardew Valley, Undertale/Deltarune as a break, considerably less gay games. (Har, har)

[rustcleaver]

It Falters On The Horizon (Chapter 1)

Fnaf Eclipse x gn reader, 6k words

(it/they/he pronouns are used for Eclipse)

If any of you have an ao3 invite I could use, I would be deeply grateful <3

Waking up for work on a Tuesday morning isn’t all that bad if you like your job. It doesn’t even need to be particularly glamorous; anything that doesn’t make you want to crumple to the floor like a tinfoil ball by the end of your shift is a win. And anything beats retail. So you’re pretty satisfied with your decent pay (and flexible hours) at the Fazbear Entertainment™ Mega Pizzaplex©. You even get to google conspiracy theories on company time, it’s great.

Your alarm rings, and you feel at least half the joints in your spine crack as you sit up to turn it off. It takes a minute of flailing like an indignant carp before you’re able to roll out of bed and onto your feet. You grab your Fazwatch© (patent pending) from its little charging station and its screen buzzes to life. A few practiced button-taps show you the day’s schedule. All the tours are at the regular times, showing the same schedule as it did last night. Maybe you don’t need to check it as often as you do, but management has made last-minute changes before, and it’s pretty fair to assume it will happen again. For some reason or another, the tour times will sometimes get moved around or cancelled on the day-of. After a month on the job, you’re comfortable enough in your routine to give a tour on 5-minute’s notice. (You had to last Friday. That was a new low, even for Faz-management.) But everything looks fine today, so you shouldn’t have to whip out The Ol’ Fazbear Entertainment Approved Apology Spiel for any poor customers who might miss the sudden change in their tour times. 

You once bet $50 that management will try to move a tour to some time in the past. The staff bot that cleans at your end of Rockstar Row is often the recipient of your quips, and it only stopped sweeping for a second to acknowledge your comment. You still aren’t sure if it knows what money is, and you probably don’t have 50 bucks to spare, anyway. You guys can probably just call it even. Besides, you think it found the joke funny (it made a single ‘ha’ sound), so that’s probably all that matters.

You used to be surprised by the number of people you can find in the pizzaplex at the asscrack of dawn, but the magic of the place (and the meticulously crafted ads on kids’ youtube) always attracts a small crowd. Weekdays are pretty quiet in the mornings, but there’s always someone visiting the pizzaplex. It’s a lavish place that probably pays more money for the monthly electricity than you will ever see in your life, but you’re sure the company can afford it easily with the number of guests they get. With how stupidly overpriced some of the stuff is here, you’re sure those guys have plenty of funds to spare. You really don’t get why management will always cut corners and be so cheap, then turn around and drop hundreds of thousands on some shiny new robot. Fickle, those guys.

Anyways, back to your own work:

Thankfully, it’s never too busy back at Rockstar Row during the day when the animatronics are performing or going to private birthday parties. You can hear their music if you listen for it, but all the festivities are distant enough that they don’t disturb you. The voices, cheers, and catchy tunes blend together in a gentle hum-drone of white noise. You keep saying that you’re gonna watch a performance one of these days, but you want to go at a time when you won’t get lost in a sea of pre-teens and their exhausted parents, so you keep putting it off. Usually, none of said pre-teens or parents are hanging around Rockstar Row when you prepare for the day, so you can have your peace of mind as you clock in. You can even whistle a bit of copyrighted music while dusting off the ol’ display cases without getting a single disapproving email from management. Throughout the day, you give a couple of tours down the Row to tell the history and legends of the old Fazbear pizzerias, throwing in some popular conspiracy theories and horror stories for spice. There’s plenty of time in between the tours of this makeshift museum when you usually just sit around in case anybody needs directions or something. All-in-all, it’s a pretty nice job. And you’re pretty darn good at it, too. Nobody knows how to redirect a customer to somebody who actually knows how to help with whatever wild shit happened to their kid quite like you do.

Sometimes, Rockstar Row gets kinda crowded at the end of the day when the animatronics are doing meet-n-greets in their rooms. There aren’t any museum tours at this time (thank Faz), so you get to sit down at your little desk area and watch how these vibrant characters and their equally dazzling personalities capture the attention of the crowds. They’re real pros at what they do; you can’t help but smile at their acts, even from a distance. 

There have been a few times when there wasn’t anyone waiting in line to chat with one of the animatronics, so Freddy or Roxy will sometimes come over to say hi when you wave to them. You’ve been hoping to introduce yourself to Monty and Chica, but their rooms aren’t really visible from your corner of Rockstar Row (and you don’t want to intrude when anyone’s busy), so you’re limited to the other two at the moment. Freddy is very popular and very busy, he is the titular character after all, so you’ve probably spoken to Roxy the most. She once expressed gratitude that she doesn’t have to maintain her usual act and energy when she talks with you. It was a pretty serious and vulnerable comment, so you wanted to respond in a positive and encouraging manner. The somewhat goofy thumbs-up that you gave her (clearly not the expected response) made her laugh so hard that Freddy came over, concerned that her voicebox was glitching out. The memory makes you smile as you clock in for the day.

---

On this morning, this perfectly average Tuesday morning, you do a double-take at one of the display cases. Empty. It definitely isn’t supposed to be, so you walk over to take a look at it. You stop a couple of inches away from the glass and squint at it like this is some optical illusion. Yep, definitely empty, no amount of rubber-necking or suspicious glances appear to be changing that. Also, it looks like the top panel has been unceremoniously smashed in. In fact, it took you a perfectly normal amount of time to notice that the whole upper half of the glass box is shattered. Yes. And, like the awe-inspiring detective you are, you start looking around on the floor. You know, just in case the old Chica arm had hopped out of its display case and was lying around somewhere. Okay, so maybe it’s a little hard to wake up on a Tuesday no matter what your job is. 

You’re almost surprised that management didn’t tell you about the missing exhibits before your shift, but then you remember how low they keep setting the bar. They probably didn’t know, or didn’t care. You move to check the rest of the displays yourself and see that an original Fredbear top hat has also disappeared. This horrible loss is enough to properly wake you up. That was your favorite exhibit. It was a nice little hat that will be sorely missed. You take a minute to grieve the tragic loss before you see your good pal (the staff bot who you might owe $50 to someday) vacuuming around the golden Roxy statue. You jog over to it and give a little wave.

“Hey! How’s it going?” You say. It turns off the vacuum and looks over at you. It blinks twice and gives you a thumbs-up. 

“Happy to hear it! Doesn’t look like you got covered in soda like last week, so that’s good. Hey, if that ever happens again, you can come to me if you need a hand with cleaning it off. I’m getting pretty good with those chem wipes. Also, two of the exhibits are missing: the Chica arm and the old top hat. Do you know anything about that?” You ask, remembering your original mission mid-sentence and pointing at the crime scene. In response, the staff bot looks at the ground for a minute, then tilts its head quizzically. It turns to look down the hallway and makes a little ping sound at a nearby security bot. The security bot comes over and the two of them look at each other silently for a minute. Robot-to-robot conversation, robot-to-robot communication. The security bot looks briefly at the floor like the staff bot did, then the two resume their telepathic chat. You begin to wonder if you should ask again later when they both turn to look at you. The security bot beeps a few times. 

“...Did you see anything suspicious around the displays recently?” You offer, guessing at what the security bot is trying to communicate. It shakes its head in response. 

“Can you check the security camera footage from last night?” It nodds this time. 

“Great! So, do you see anything..?” You wait a moment. Maybe the security bot didn’t hear you? It keeps looking at you but doesn’t respond, doesn’t move. Your fazwatch buzzes on your wrist, and you read the screen, confused.

REQUESTING SECURITY CLEARANCE ...

...

APPROVED

UPDATED SECURITY CLEARANCE FOR: DAYCARE ENTRANCE

Ok. Well, that’s something. But the daycare has been closed for long before you even got hired, and you doubt that whoever stole the two displays would have any reason to put them there. (Our great detective has deemed this a case of larceny, deducing that there iss a thief afoot.)

“The daycare? You want me to go to the old daycare..?” You ask. The security bot nods. 

“Shouldn’t I go to the security office for this sort of thing?” It doesn’t respond. Your fazwatch opens the pizzaplex map and begins charting a course for the daycare. There’s your answer, you suppose. The security bot begins rolling back to its post and you shout a quick thank-you. Turning back to your dear friend and colleague, staff bot, you shrug.

“Well, the security bots probably know a lot better than I do. I’ve got about an hour, so I’m gonna go check it out. Wish me luck!” You give it a dramatic little salute. It blinks in acknowledgment and goes right back to vacuuming.

---

It always bothered you that “Floor 1” isn’t always the first floor of a building. Sometimes, it’s literally the second floor. You are reminded of this tragedy as you take the elevator down to the “Ground Level” and step out onto the balcony. (Note that even the “Ground Level” has two levels. Fazbear Entertainment really dropped the ball on this one.) You shuffle out of the elevator, leaving room for the family passing by while checking your faz-map. It says that you just have to go left. And there it is, a large pair of doors labeled “Superstar Daycare Pick-Up”. You’ve never had to go inside, but it still shocks you that you never noticed the entrance before. The lights above the door are off and all the paint is faded, so it’s admittedly hard to spot. You hesitate for a second, just standing there, staring at the door handle. You get the sense that you aren’t supposed to be here, like you’re a child about to get caught doing something that you were told not to. Reminding yourself that you were literally told to come here, you try to shake the feeling. As weird as this whole thing is, you’re pretty curious to see whatever the security bot has sent you to find. Besides, if this yields nothing, you can just stop by the security office and ask somebody else for help. You finally turn the handle and step through the door.

Here you find a large, poorly lit, and lifeless area. There are only a few posters on the walls, lit by bands of neon light. Some are of the band, but you notice several that depict a sun figure and a moon figure. These advertise some “Sundrop” and “Moondrop” candies. You find it weird for the Fazbear advertisement team (faz-vertisement, if you will) to come up with new characters just to promote some candy that you’ve never even heard of. Weird when they will typically do whatever they can to “show the audience our beloved cast of Fazbear Ent. characters that you know and love” (reuse the same old clipart of the animatronics for most ads because, collectively, they do not give a single damn). But here are two characters you have never seen before. Something entirely new. A sun and a moon. 

You walk over to the posters and note the layer of dust clinging to them. The sun and moon look very similar in design and are clearly each other’s counterparts. You’re the museum guide, the person who probably knows the most about the pizzaplex’s history, and yet you’ve never heard anything about these two characters. Maybe these were just a part of the daycare’s shtick since the entrance also has a sun and moon on it? You decide to grab a couple of these posters as potential stand-ins for the missing exhibits. Even if you don’t need the interim replacements, you’ll definitely want to look into these characters later. 

You pass a little fountain surrounded by the world’s jankiest fake palm trees on the way to the end of the hall. It’s impossible not to marvel at the dichotomy of how cheap or extravagant Fazbear Entertainment can be. There are some lights around the fountain’s edge, but the water isn’t running, just lying quietly at the basin. Your footsteps echo over the checkered PVC floor tiles and the poor lighting doesn’t let you see the ceiling. It looks like it might go on infinitely. This room feels too big. You grip your phone a little tighter. 

You eventually come to a big, metal shutter door with a little panel to the right. Using your sleeve, you wipe the dust off the screen. After a few taps, it begins to boot up and update. You are presented with a few options, and “Open Daycare Entrance [A]” immediately catches your eye. You press the button and it makes a little ping sound.

 AUTHENTICATING CLEARANCE, PLEASE WAIT… 

Your watch buzzes, and you flinch at it, startled. It shows a loading wheel for just a second before the panel beeps again. 

STAND CLEAR OF SHUTTERS UNTIL FULLY OPEN 

And the metal doors begin to rise. Inside, you spot a golden statue of the sun and moon figures. So they have 3D designs, too. That’s a little too much effort for a couple of candies. This thing looks just as glamorous as the statues of the band members out in Rockstar Row. Impressed, you take a photo and begin walking around this little entrance area filled with chairs. There is a thick net that hangs in front of you with a railing that leaves room for a rainbow slide. The sign above it says “Slide Into Fun!” and points at the opening. Hm. No thanks. 

You lean against the railing and look into the massive space beyond the net. There are a bunch of play structures and a massive river of a ball pit that you can barely make out in the dark. You see a small balcony to your right, on the only wall where there is no netting. It is the only place inside that is properly lit, gleaming in the spotlight, but it doesn’t look like there’s any way to get up to it. Over on the left, you think you see a desk. It’s right next to some large wooden doors, and you’re glad to see a normal entrance so you won’t have to use the slide. It could be fun, don’t get me wrong, but thoughts of dashcon ricochet around your brain as you envision the ball pit at the end. You choose to think about something else. Like your mission! Yes. You’re here to… well, you’re not really sure. Find whatever the security bot wants you to find, I guess. It’s darker in this area, feeling even more abandoned than the fountain area before. You can’t really see, but you doubt that the (potential) thief would choose to stick around in the building, so you don’t think that’s what you’re looking for here. There’s no one else in the entrance area, so you’ll have to go inside the daycare to see if there’s anyone you can talk to. Maybe there’s a security bot who guards the place, and maybe it knows what happened. So, to get inside, you’ll have to make your way down some stairs and circle around the walled-in (netted-in?) daycare area to get to those doors.

Said doors feel a lot taller when you’re right in front of them. It’s a little intimidating, to be honest. From here, you can see the corners of the mechanisms that open the door, and you’re glad that the doorknobs about 20 feet up are just ornamental. This does, unfortunately, leave you with no idea of how to actually open the doors. The thought of flailing about to grab those doorknobs gives you a laugh, at least. For lack of a better idea, you knock on the door. 

“Anybody here? Knock knock.” You say to yourself, trying to come up with a plan to get in. You most certainly don’t expect a reply.

“Who’s there?” Rings a response in a muffled, robotic voice. This makes you jump like a cat. There really is something in there, and it’s definitely not a security bot. But that doesn’t sound like the voice of anybody in the band; it has a completely different intonation and almost rumbles at the end of its words. Each of the glamrocks has a distinctive voice, and this doesn’t match any of them. And, above all else, it just set you up for a knock-knock joke. Now this is serious. It’s one thing to meet a mystery robot in an abandoned area of a technologically-unmatched pizzaplex, but it’s something else to get the perfect set-up for a real bad pun. You’re gonna have to think hard about this one, pull out all the stops. You could use the ol’ classic “Boo-who” but that’s too basic, too predictable. There’s one about yodeling, but you don’t remember how the second part goes, so you’ll have to improvise a bit.

You settle with a “Wa.” 

A few clicks resound behind those doors. You take a small step away from whatever they came from.  

Your mysterious interlocutor responds after a moment, sounding genuinely curious: 

“Wa who?” 

“Mario, is that you?” You offer, hoping that your improvised punch-line makes sense. After a second, a hearty chuckle echoes from inside the daycare. There’s a rumble as the doors before you start to swing open (which makes you jump again, but this time it feels more like the frantic wiggle of a disgruntled worm than the hop of a cat). The doors open slowly, making you wait a moment before gingerly taking a step inside and looking around. 

The darkness is almost complete in here, and the air feels heavy. There is a particularly dark area around the play structure right in front of you, casting even more shadows around itself. Within that darkness, you see a wavering, orange glow. Two pinpricks of light loom above you, shining down from this structure. You realize that this must be your new “friend.”

“I’ve never heard that one before,” It muses, “but I don’t think it’s legally advisable for any Fazbear Entertainment staff to mention Mario by name. Copyright infringement is against the rules.”

You realize that the glowing orange points are a pair of eyes. Eyes that are firmly locked on you during the slow tilt of its head. There are some other glowing areas around them, but they’re dim enough that you can’t make out their shapes.

“Ah, right. Definitely wouldn’t want to cause a lawsuit.” Your voice doesn’t even echo in this cavernous space. You are suddenly made very aware that you’re completely alone with this thing. In the dark. Pretty far away from anyone. Spooky, but you’re being so brave about it. 

The eyes before you do a whirling clockwise spin while the entire patch of orange glow moves rhythmically downwards. You hear something land gently on the floor with the rattle of a bell, crouching to absorb the impact. Those eyes are still on you, and you don’t think they’ve blinked at all. You are aware of how difficult it would be to evacuate this area. Deeply aware.

“Can’t have any guests overhearing the unlicensed use of another company’s character, now can we? Well, we’re alone in here, so I suppose I could let it slide…” The voice gives a dramatic hum as the stranger stands up, eyes rising to a height that towers over you.

“And I did like the joke... Alright, we can overlook this one. But you should be more careful, you know. I’m sure it would be a terrible hassle if Nintendo tried to sue the company again.” There’s a creak of metal and plastic as the figure seems to lean to the left, chuckling to itself. A few bells ring from the light source as its shoulders bounce with the laugh. Then, you hear a gasp.

“Oh- Now where are my manners? This is no way to welcome our new guest!” It speaks with a completely different energy, standing upright again. 

“Do forgive me, and allow me to introduce myself properly!” There’s a tap-tap-tap of steps as those luminous eyes get closer. You shuffle backward and tense at the sudden approach, arms raised defensively. This thing sounds kind enough, but hearing a massive metallic creature approach you from the dark and seeing nothing but its glowing eyes is pretty fucking scary.

Seeing your reaction, it comes to a stop. Now that it’s closer, you can see its eyes flash with a concerned look that darts around your face before landing nervously on the ground. It almost looks like it’s deflating, the way the lights seem to shrink in on themselves. You hear quiet, rapid taps from where you imagined its hands might be held, fidgeting.

“Oh dear, I’m sorry! Did I frighten you? Goodness- that’s no good, no good at all-” It keeps stumbling over its terse apologies, slowly backing away. Its body language makes it seem so much smaller than you, even though this colossal silhouette is obviously anything but. Those eyes are squinted in what might be the start of panic, or dejection. Oh great. We gave the poor robot anxiety.

“No, no, it’s fine- I just got a little, uh... Surprised because I can’t really see what’s happening and I don’t know what-” You’re cut off by the sound of a whack sound coming from the animatronic’s face. You realize it just facepalmed. 

“Of course! Oh, how silly of me, how ridiculous! I can’t very well introduce myself if you can’t even see me, now can I? Here- Give me just a moment-” It turns and disappears into the daycare, its muttering growing distant. You notice that, despite the bells you heard before, it was nearly silent as it left. After a moment of wondering if you should be worried, a click reverberates from above as the lights buzz to life. This causes you to squint for a minute, feeling just as blind as when you were in the dark. You blink until your eyes adjust and look into the now-illuminated daycare. The entire space looks much more inviting in the light; everything popping with color and life. Now, you can finally get a good look at the animatronic who’s approaching, more sheepishly this time. 

It’s easy to tell that they're at least 8 feet tall, even though they bow their head to appear less intimidating. It folds its hands together in the same way that an old lady might when she’s saying something sweet, except this colossal robot has four arms to work with. Double the gesture, double the sentiment, I guess. You think those fingertips might be pointed, but you’re choosing not to look too close. Its face is round with a crescent shape on the inside and two rows of triangles on the outside. You get the impression of one of those sun/moon theater masks: one that might be happy on one side, then sad on the other. There’s a large nightcap sitting at an angle on its head; the end of it rests on his shoulder and sways slightly with each step. All of the robot’s clothing look soft and flowy, giving it a very gentle and elegant appearance. Whatever plastic its face is made of, it’s clearly malleable, allowing the animatronic to make minute shifts in its expression for a precise demonstration of emotions. You have to admit, whoever designed the animatronics here is some kind of genius.

“There. Let me try one more time.” It sighs with an apologetic smile.

The half-sun, half-moon character stops before you and gives a dignified bow, the motion smooth and practiced.

“My name is Eclipse, I am the caretaker of the Superstar Daycare. It’s very nice to meet you. Welcome, and sorry again for the poor first impression.” They address you. Their smile is so genuine that you can’t help but mirror it as you return the greeting, introducing yourself in turn. 

“Come in, come in! Make yourself at home! Here, allow me to get you a seat-” They respond, visibly straightening up now that they know that there’s no hard feelings. You know that they literally glow, but they still seem so radiant with their rejuvenated spirit. That smile of theirs definitely got wider, and they move with a skip in their steps. They pull up two of the few adult-sized chairs and set them by a small, plastic table. It stands by one of the chairs and gestures for you to sit, intending to push in your chair for you. It’s pointedly gentle with this, too, even speaking slightly quieter because you were closer. You have to admit, this Eclipse is quite a charming host, and a fascinating character. After you are seated, they sit in their own chair and rest their upper pair of arms on the table between you, tapping their fingers rhythmically. The anxiety from before is gone, but an excited energy still dances behind those eyes.

“We don’t get a lot of guests, so it truly is an honor! Is there anything I can help you with, my dear guest?” He asks, tilting his head a little. 

“Yes, actually,” You begin, “I’m the tour guide for the museum area along Rockstar Row, and two of the exhibits disappeared last night. The cases were broken, so it looks like they might have been stolen. I tried to ask one of the nearby security bots about it, and it sent me here to learn more.” You point at your faz-watch and Eclipse looks truly enraptured by your every word.

“I see! Terribly sorry to hear about the exhibits, but that does explain a thing or two. I just got a request to authorize someone’s security clearance to come in here. I didn’t know what it could possibly be for, but I guess that must have been you!” 

“Yeah! Though I still don’t get why they wanted me to come here. Especially when there’s a dedicated security office for this sort of thing.” You admit. Eclipse chuckles at that and rests its chin in one of its hands, its eyes narrowing with a cheeky flaire.

“If I had to guess, that would be because I’m the head of security, here at the Pizzaplex.” His grin seems to widen at your surprise. He titters briefly before continuing, each laugh lighter than the flutter of a moth’s wing.

“Yes, funny how the head of security isn’t in the security office, isn’t it? Well, there’s rarely anything that requires my input down there. Though, I wonder why they didn’t just show you the camera footage when you asked, even if you aren’t security personnel-” He trails off, closing his eyes for a moment. His brows furrow and his smile slips for just a moment.

“Ah. So that’s why… But surely it would have…” They go quiet for a little longer, eyes flickering about beneath their eyelids. They hum quizzically as they open their eyes and look back at you with an unreadable expression.

“It looks like there are no recordings from the Rockstar Row’s security cameras from last night… But I’m certain I was able to see through them at the time, and I didn’t receive any kind of notifications about them malfunctioning later… That’s…” It gives a defeated laugh.

“It looks like I’ll have to investigate a bit more thoroughly, then.” They conclude, shrugging with their second pair of arms. 

“Well then! I’ll be in contact if I find anything, but you should go get ready for today’s tours.” He waves a hand and you feel your faz-watch buzz in response. On the screen, you see a message from Eclipse that just says “Hello :)” from a messaging app that management occasionally contacts you with. On the time above the notification, you can see that there are only 10 minutes until the first tour starts. Oh shit. You need to get moving. Eclipse springs to his feet and motions you to the door with a flourish of all four arms. 

“Feel free to message me if you need anything else, we’re always happy to help. It’s truly been lovely meeting you, and good luck with today’s tours!” They conclude with a showman’s poise. You thank them as you hurry out the door, to the stairs. Before leaving the daycare, you turn to give the grand play area one last glance, hoping to wave to Eclipse on the way out. You aren’t able to spot them, just a metal cable unfurling from the ceiling, falling to a point behind one of the play structures. Then, the lights go out, leaving you in a little hollow of light around the golden sun and moon statue. It’s a bit sad that you couldn’t say another goodbye, but you decide you’ll make up for it when you aren’t possibly running late for work. You are very grateful for the reminder, but you’re certain you never told them when the first tour was starting.

- - -

You return to Rockstar Row with 7 minutes to spare. Thankfully, your favorite staff bot has been kind enough to clean up the broken glass around the missing exhibits while you were gone. You make a mental note to thank them later, then make a physical note to place by the exhibits: 

“This exhibit is temporarily absent for routine maintenance and repairs” You write with your best handwriting and hope that it sounds official enough that the guests won’t interrogate you about it. You are so caught up in thinking about excuses you can give people or where you might find a temporary replacement that you don’t notice the heavy footsteps that stop right behind you.

“Hey, heads up. Somebody’s gonna walk right into ya if you’re spacing out in the middle of the walkway.” A voice snaps you out of it. You turn to see a pair of nonchalant, red eyes looking down at you over a pair of star-shaped shades. The legendary Montgomery Gator himself stands in front of you, with one hand on his hip and his head tilted like he’s somewhere between casual and completely uninterested. 

“Right, yeah. Didn’t mean to get in your way, sorry.” You take a step back, out of the way, shaking your head once to clear your mind like an etch-a-sketch. 

“Don’t sweat it.” Monty adjusts his sunglasses. You expect the animatronic to keep walking, but he’s still looking at you, so you raise an eyebrow at him.

“Hey, you’re the museum guide, right? Not that you can call this handful of trinkets much of a museum... I heard you got hired a while back, but I never got the chance to see for myself. So, I’m Monty.” It seems he’s landed on casual over disinterested as he holds out his hand for a handshake. You return it, both of you giving a firm couple of shakes and feeling some mutual respect for it. It isn’t every day that someone returns a nice, solid handshake with the same amount of gusto. 

“It’s nice to finally meet you! I was trying to find the time to properly introduce myself, but this works, too. And yeah, we lost two exhibits last night, so the museum’s looking even more sparse than usual. Not really sure how I’m going to fill the tour time I usually spend on those, but I’ve only got 5 minutes to figure it out.” You say, shaking your head and shrugging in exaggerated defeat.

“Yeah, I noticed the empty cases. That’s tough. Someone should probably remove the broken glass, though; some kid’s gonna get hurt on that. So, did somebody steal ‘em?” He asks. He’s nonchalant about it, but he seems genuinely interested. Maybe there’s a secret passion for gossip and drama under that rough exterior... Or maybe he’s just concerned for everyone’s safety. Either way, his eyes are still locked on you.

“That’s what it seems like, but I’m not sure. I asked around and nobody seems to know what happened- the staff bots were even saying that they can’t access the security footage from last night… Well, I’m sure this incident has already been reported or logged in whatever system, so it’s probably out of my hands. Still, I’m gonna ask around for any signs of a break-in. Oh, speaking of, did you see anything weird last night?” You realize just how little you know about the situation as you recount everything, it’s all so odd. Monty immediately shrugs and shakes his head at your question, which is only a little disappointing. 

“Nope, I did a little patrolling around the atrium last night, but I spent most of my free time playin’ the bass.” He says, making air guitar motions for emphasis. Suddenly, he flashes a playful smile, then gives you a suspicious side-eye.

“Hey, you think I’m a suspect or something? This is startin’ to feel like an interrogation- I do have an alibi if you’re not convinced by my testimony, detective.” He makes sure to bitterly enunciate every syllable of the word. If he wasn’t smiling, you might think he was being serious, but you play along.

“Hmm, I really can’t rule it out… Anyone could be the perp- even me! No one suspects the detective, after all!” You dramatically wiggle your fingers at him, to which he feigns a shocked gasp. It’s incredible how these guys can make such realistic breath sounds with their voiceboxes. 

“We should’a known it was you, you connivin’ little punk!” He really hams up the act, pointing at you and everything. You laugh a couple times, internally commending his dedication to the bit. Even though you just met, he’s joking around with you like you’re old friends. It’s nice to be treated like you’re a cool dude without having to prove anything, and Monty immediately gives you that respect. You appreciate it.

“Seriously though: I don’t think you could wear the tophat with that mohawk of yours, and god knows what you would even need an old Chica arm for. So, I think you’re off the hook for now.” You gaze off towards your desk and the exhibits nearby it. There appears to be a small crowd gathering over there. You’re wondering what that’s all about when it strikes you.

“Oh shit, I’m gonna be late for the tour.” You say, deadpan. After a beat, you start running over to your desk, dodging a kid. You don’t turn around, but you briefly look over your shoulder to say goodbye.

“See ya later, alligator!” Which works doubly well because he really is an alligator. You catch an amused Monty in the corner of your eye, and it seems like he gets the joke when he barks a single laugh.

“In a while, crocodile!” He shouts after you.

[trippinsorrows]

So roman is fully okay with tama having sex? Like he gave him condoms and agreed to it 😭😭 how would would Tama be?

oh no, he’s not okay with it at all. doesn’t approve, and he tells tama that. but, roman also isn’t stupid. he knows how teenage boys are. he was one at one point. he knows that there’s a good chance tama is going to do it anyway, and he just wants him to be safe and not knock anyone up so they can avoid any teen pregnancies

🙃🙃🙃

but that’s the double standard that solana calls him out on, because she’s just trying to do the same thing for the girls, but he’s not seeing it that way ole stubborn ass 🙄

also tama would be safe lmao he’s kinda expecting the whole “you’re too young to be having sex” spiel from his dad but not entirely surprised about being given condoms lmao

[empressofdiamonds]

I'll repeat it again

If you find yourself having to type out whole thick paragraphs, going on Spiels to explain yourself in your relationship with someone, THAT by itself is a sign it needs to be examined more and simplified more. Your relationship shouldn't be bible thick, and you shouldn't feel confused, unsure, uncertain about it. Keep it simple. Don't assume things, take things as they are, as objectively as you can.

I get lots of anons that are incredibly thick and reading about halfway I already know what's the issue. It's right there in the text. Often it's plain disrespect but the asker is explaining it away, minimizing it, instead of facing it upfront. I just don't answer those sorts of anons because it's always the same thing every time. I suggest you read my content and take a good ole fashioned step back, breathe and hard look at your own situation.

[sleepyperefix]

The barbie movie isnt perfect but I am kinda confused as to how many people think it's anti-men. It is a feminist movie and as such among other things, it holds a mirror up showing how we as men do ourselves a disservice by relying our self worth (and by proxy form our identities) on manhood and capabilities, instead of just who we are as individuals who exist. The movie is incredibly on the nose, which at first I thought was a flaw, but then I remembered that I have seen discussions where it was obvious that those sentiments actually need to be said out loud as they not obvious to everyone. On the other side apparently it should have been more clear with how it is not anti-men but also a commentary for all genders about growing and building an identity and self worth outside your designated role and question your world.

This ended up way too long but I hope it is understandable nonetheless. I am going to generalize a lot. Obviously people are not card boards and most men who are secure in themselves have an identity beyond manhood. I am broadly comparing toxic masculinity and gender hierarchies in reality to Barbies and Kens in Barbieland. Also spoilers.

The movie touches on how men, in order to hide their insecurities, lean into their role as man and acquire/max out object-focused (esp. male connotated objects and topics as cars, STEM and technology) knowledge and skills. This is to conform to the capability and providing standards for men, to find an identity within good role fullfilment and also a place in the united/uniform male experience (perfectly seen in 'push' and in men vs. women memes) since diverging from it devalues the own claim to manhood. The good ol' toxic masculinity spiel. Men in the patriarchy cope with the responsibility of power with misogyny, highlighting the perceived gender-dichotomy and how they are just biologically more [insert positively connotated attribute, men have claimed as part of their biology]. Then they assert the claim by 'proving' to be more capable than women. They decide the rules of the game and what a worthy skill is (and for whom), which they then get trained on as early as they are toddlers through toys. It is a lose-lose cycle.

And the Barbies do something similar at the beginning. They celebrate and are named after their professions/capabilities, believed they saved girls in the real world (legacy), and let the Kens worship them. They have more natural self worth and security as Barbies by virtue of being Barbies (just like men build their individual self worth on being man and their object-focused capabilites) but are somewhat empty because they are captives of their own system and habits, never really questioning it. They deserve power and to be worshipped, because they are Barbies. However Kens, at the beginning, are supposed to be empty on the inside and focused solely outwards on Barbies. It is not even that the Barbies want them, but this is how it is supposed to be. They are accessories. Their role inherently doesnt offer worth outside of Barbie, not even in capabilities (just as the women's role often is described as worthy only in relation to men and family). When the positions switched you then see how the Kens still not having the same natural self worth the Barbies had. It is socialized and fundamental, a casualness of design in Barbie society and the Kens are just copying the structure without understanding it and still having their old socialization internalized. Leading to Ken still being unhappy, chasing the same dream, and still insecure as a prestige role needs to be nurtured into natural self worth and with that a belief of deservingness and worthy capabilities to provide and be desired.

The movie then shows how men hold themselves captive in patriarchy, in the real world this is leading to sentiments such as: "Only women, children, and dogs are loved unconditionally. A man is only loved under the condition that he provide something" (Chris Rock), which was discussed as if feminism was to blame for the transactional nature of love and not the patriarchy. But then the movie also shows them that they are enough and how to escape the cycle. Accept yourself and fill yourself with self-worth by virtue of existing as an individual. It is an extremely timely message for men in a time when hustling, grinding and becoming a "high value man" is taught to young boys by influencers.

And most importantly it shows that we as humans can all be equal offenders if we have power but are emptily reproducing, insecure, and not reflecting. Ken is not an evil character. At first he is suffering from being oppressed. Not because Barbie doesnt want him, but because he isn't allowed and able yet to be anything other than the unloved and eternally competing and unsure accessory. His fault lies in going 'eye for eye' instead of for equality. Barbieland is said to be perfect but subtextually we are supposed to see that it is not. However, the Barbies are not evil either, they just don't know differently, they reproduce instead of question. This inherent human flaw is seen in them not establishing equality immediately but wanting to ease into it over time. They also are brainwashed in "seconds", because - an this is just my interpretation - they were just reproducing a (more prestige) role and an identity build on profession + role. Our main Barbie did not want to question anything either. In the real world then, men are also not inherently evil, but complicit in evil by naivety or ignorance, and with festering insecurity and lack of self-identity we have the very real potential to become toxic and alt-right. That's how they get you. They pick insecure men and give them a manual: (1) support the patriarchy and right-winged/conservative parties, (2) become capable and able to provide (dont worry, the path has been eased for you), (3) base your self worth on that, you will apear confident. Then women, who in this system have limited options, will want them and they will be powerful and worthy individuals. All in all, this message is as pro-man as feminism usually gets and supported in the movie by the men in the real world. They don't have an evil scheme to hurt someone, they even try to save Barbieland but ultimately cannot let go of their habits (almost like the Barbies) as they are ignorant and reluctant to lose power.

So no, Barbie (2023) is not anti-men. In fact, I felt more understood by this movie than by any other that sugar coats the lose-lose cycle of patriarchy. Barbie leaves at the end and that makes perfect sense. Like Frodo she has been irreversibly changed too much and and Barbieland has not. The Barbies might be capable and secure, but they are also just learning to question their world and changing it and themselves only slowly. The Kens are just starting to become secure and to find themselves outside of Barbies. The stereotypical Barbie on the other side has to go to a place where life might be worse but in the end as complex and full as she now is.

[koumeowkami]

Reread through the notes I made and to sum it up, I do think the pararai anime is neat! I knew spoilery stuff about Nayuta since way back when and had a general grasp of the character's trap reactions, but not so much about the general plot (aside from the winners and all) so I don't think I have much thoughts about it?

As a story in of itself though, I like that each group gets their time in the spotlight but apparently TCW doesn't get a full performance?— My notes kept mentioning it and I seemed a little annoyed—

Also live love laugh Ryu being a menace. It was enjoyable enough but given BAE and Cozmez seemed to be in the spotlight, it sort of left TCW and Akanyatsura behind in terms of development (Although they seemed developed enough, if that makes sense)

Stuff from my notes

Hell yeah this is what I've been waiting for! (ep 1)

The phantometals' effects look so good and I really like the look of the animation

Second instance (as far as I know) of Gakuto Kajiwara being the lead protagonist in a music franchise anime adaptation <- the other one being ACTORS: Song Connection..

I REALLY DO LIKE MURASE'S RANGE AS HAJUN

He's a mood (Allen)

Paradox Devil thing reminds me of Grim

Ryu-kun!

HANAEEEE

I did praise the animation but why does the stamen in that flower look so stiff

Cozmez? Cozmez!

Why is Kanata so pretty

I never really got into the how or why phantometals connect to their users other than making it from their trauma, this anime makes it digestible

(Allen drawing on Hajun's apron and shouting "Inspiration!") Leo Tsukinaga is that you

Hajun pretty boy antics

Bae oversleeping on opening night huh..

Hajun flying them in!

Trauma!

Cozmez is drawn so ethereal

The OP is really nice (ep 2)

Not Kanata gatekeeping hiphop?/lh

Kanallen! ..Nevermind, he was robbing him

..Mouse as big as a dog? Isn't that like a rat.. come on we have a song called rats and nobles..

Kanata gatekeeping!

Ryu-kun having fun! (the tcw vs akanyatsura battle)

—Not showing TCW & Akanyatsura's performance? Foul

Old man yaoi

(Has stopped keeping track of the episodes)

Time to see TCW performance. or not...

Ryu is a menace and I am INTO it

Reo is adorable

ep.5 and this OP still is a banger

Not Kanata and Nayuta both having their own spiels about "I can't let you stay here" <- since.. yeah, does that mean that this is how Kanata thinks subconsciously?

When are we gonna look at TCW performing

Allen working part-time throughout the Ryu episode...

HILARIOUS

Allen "little dapper man" Sugasano

ep.7

Nayuta...

Nayushiki duet at the end?!?@??@?

ep.9 - Sweet ol kanalller contend <- watched the scene and was writing at the same time while laughing hysterically

NAYUTA READ THE ROOM

(end of notes)

omg aeri... pls read the drama tracks when you can cause 😭 once you do you realize how much this anime is missing (or even got wrong)...

you're right abt akyr and tcw not having enough screentime and to be honest, i'd say the same abt cozmez since they didn't explain anything abt their backstory – nayushiki thing aside – and completely ruined the ending... bae got so many useless scenes 😞

so yeah, even if the characters seemed to have gotten any development, no one knows what caused it anyways (or at least, i talked abt the anime with my irl friend who's anime-only, and she genuinely didn't understand some stuff that happened cause they didn't explain shit lol).

replying to the stuff from your notes

the effects are really one of the only things i'm willing to defend abt this anime cause they were truly SO GOOD!! i was so scared of how bad the cgi would've been but i was proved wrong, the performances were all really cool <3

i'm not sure if you're into fragraria memories but gakkun voices the lead protagonist there as well! and hallritt has red hair too... curious...

paradevil is truly our grim... they'd be great friends

the flower symbolizes tsubaki, saimon's late wife (i'm pretty sure no anime-only fan understood that cause they never mentioned her LMAO; that's also why they keep showing that damn flower)

they "skipped" the justice performance but it's only cause they showed tcw with 4 real later! each group had one battle performance :D

yes, everything nayuta says is part of kanata's subconscious!! phantom nayuta is literally the personification of kanata's deepest thoughts, the truth under millions of layers 👍🏻

i loved kanallen in the filler episode, that's what youngsters would call "my roman empire" nowadays. also yeah notice kanata cockblocking himself (through nayuta)

i support you saying "why is cozmez so pretty" every few notes. relatable

[shirogane-oushirou]

sorry for being a gacha player, it will happen again u_u posting this here bc i talk about selfship stuff + i crush on a number of these ops KNSKDJNK so. yknow. look at these funny lil guys lala~

more detail under the cut bc i made this so complicated for myself LMAO ;; also, original is here!

(ALSO i made and drafted this a number of weeks back so the "recent op" stuff is out of date kjsndfkjn but i am Nawt going back and changing it. <3 )

[cw mentions of an irl cheating scandal and a meme that could maybe? trigger emeto]

first 6*: angelina... pubby... she's nowhere near meta anymore lmaoooo but she's still special to me. she's Baby. i think she might have also been my first e2 6*?

recent 6*: i very suddenly acquired uhhh walter, g.nosis, logos, f.lametail, n.earl alter, and -- the recent shop op -- e.benholz within like a 1-2wk period jndkfjn. my materials.... i don't even have enough to e2 him rn, i'm out of chip catalysts (and red certs so i can't buy more in the shop) ;;

(i have e2'd him since i drafted this post. took a good bit of grinding tho ;;;)

favorite operator: i like.... too many ops....... this is me really weeding out a ton of ops i love. of the ones there:

> s.esa looks like oushirou and is (outwardly) a huge loser KNJASKJDN <3 he acts super chuuni but there's more going on underneath. love that archetype sm. you're such a weenie, come make out w me about it ^^ > courier is voiced by h.irakawa d.aisuke aka my fav voice actor. absolutely love courier.... if they ever give him an alter i'll scream and cry and frow up. tbch i was on the fence wrt trying the game out for MONTHS, and then my friend played a bit on stream, put courier on his squad, i heard his voice, and... i immediately downloaded it ndkfvnkdfjn i am not immune to my fav VA or a cute musk deer guy who's been through A LOT.... > m.udrock.... she's so cool.... and so strong.... i love that i started playing right before the twilight of w.olumonde rerun so i knew what she looked like as a boss character but nothing more than that, and so when i drew her in the gacha later it was like :0 BUT YOU'RE A BOSS CHARACTER?? HUH?? > mountainnnnn who's played by another fav VA, n.akai k.azuya!!! (same va as my f/o gray aha oho :3 ) also very cool and strong, interesting backstory, and. i mean. he's pretty......... ///;; > every single s.kadi KJASNDKJNKJN i'm so happy this official joke art exists. i love stoic a.byssal hunter s.kadi... i love hivemind, apocalypse-inducing s.kadi... i think i.shar'mla is so inch resting... love my fish wife.

least favorite: ok so i'm cheating a little. i don't like catapult (long, unskippable recruitment spiel, constantly ruined my early auto annihilation runs back when that was a thing -- not stuff that's really her fault as a Person in a Story, but as a Game Mechanic...;;). but even though this is an inventory meme and i don't have him... god i hate p.assenger. not through any fault of his own, though...

[CW CHEATING] he's voiced by t.akahiro s.akurai, aka the olympic-gold-medalist-level adulterer who was found to have cheated on his wife and lead his side girlfriend on for a FUCKING DECADE. used to love his voice, but it just pisses me off now, and i DESPISE that he hasn't faced much backlash role-wise (he was recast in the new m.ononoke movie though. HA. sucks to suck, asshole). so. to the garbage can w you, p.assenger. :(

most used: probably either t.horns or s.aria -- they're both the first ones i go to when making a team for new stages. ol' reliables. HOWEVER.... i think walter might be in the running eventually, she's just so new that i'd feel like i'm cheating to add her on.

most built op: either s.aria or walter, maybe? s.aria is M9, both modules (not full level), lvl 80, pot 1. walter is currently on-par w other ops in some regards and better in others -- M3, full module, max lvl, whatever -- but she is pot 5, and i want to M6 her at some point. i love her. she's broken but that makes it more fun to see her in action. mwah, blows her a kissie that she swats out of the air ^^

[sgiandubh]

Hitting a nerve, again

Dear @outlanderfandomfollies,

You took an extraordinary amount of time to lecture me on your blog with regard to one of my comments about the (in)famous funeral pictures. This deserves a reply and I hope you will understand it is done in good faith, although I cannot guarantee you that my answer will be devoid of irony. I am who I am, even if my opinions clearly vex you: I am sorry, but there is little I can do to accommodate you in that respect.

Fair enough, then. I took a stroll on your two blogs yesterday and I have to say I am underwhelmed. The thousands of words, the hundreds of pages, all that Taj Mahal of wisdom so liberally, relentlessly bestowed upon us, ignoramuses, was not enough to shake my beliefs. And pardon me the approximation: trying to make sense of what you wrote left such a strange aftertaste, that I did not pay enough attention to such details. Stupid me.

I have to say I was just starting to enjoy your very interesting interpretation of Jungian archetypes as applied to JAMMF. It did also remind me of Richard Campbell's Hero With A Thousand Faces, to be completely honest. I wanted more of that: a non-biased and personal interpretation of a beloved literary character. So, I am asking you in all honesty: why do your approach and your tone change, from professional to patronizing, when you deal with this side of the fandom, including me?

You present yourself as an independent blogger within the OL fandom. That, in my humble opinion, is a bias and a lie. There can be no independence in the current context of cold war, with the "truthers"' side bucketing out insults on a daily basis, with no prompting and no provocation from the shippers. You probably know as well as I do how the spiel works, via multiple spy sock accounts, anonymous submissions often sent to oneself and yes, rivers of "stupid shippers, idiot shippers". You also know and yet keep complete silence about it, that sensitive information is always exchanged in DMs and private groups, primarily out of respect for the people concerned (and also because that is none of your business, Antis).

Your very peculiar orientation is also something that ethically nags me. Independent, yet aligned. I find this fascinating, truly: it reminds me of an Eastern European tyrant's game of promoting himself for years to the West as aligned with the Soviets, yet independent from them. True story.

In the side note at the end of your long (loooooong) intervention about a mere comment expressing an opinion, you write:

I am asking you and I would appreciate a serious, well-researched answer (a girl can dream): exactly which boundaries did I (and I really mean I, Sgiandubh, not "shippers": that is very cheap rhetoric and I expected better from you) cross by simply expressing an opinion that disagreed with your POV?

For comparison purposes, an example of a very recent, supremely suave comment on one of the major Anti players' blogs. We never read any well-articulated protestations from you on those, ever: it is as if they do not exist. Heh. Talking about bias, when it's all about hiding the Antis' garbage under a skillfully woven carpet of scientific jargon:

And since you love side notes and caveats and all the critical apparatus paraphernalia, let me be very clear: I blurred the blogger's name on purpose, and not by cowardice. I blurred it because it is perfectly irrelevant, in this context and at the same time, very representative of a certain dominating vibe, in your camp, about OL's male lead. Something I believe you, as an independent (let's not forget aligned) blogger, should have no trouble taking a strong stance about.

Oh, the stench of intolerance, from the same person who wrote this, in 2016, on her blog:

Yes, yes. I know you also wrote your opinions changed with time and adventures along this long-winding, twisted road. Yet, I cannot help but thinking that a walk down this particular memory lane could bring more serenity and more clarity to your fandom endeavors.

I have no wish to attack you and I am not the insulting type, unlike some of your fellows. But I also do not need a laissez-passer sealed, stamped and delivered by you (with which authority?), in order to continue my journey. I would be very happy to settle on a non-aggression 'we agree to disagree' , keep calm and carry on common ground. At the very worst, I will simply ignore you and would be very grateful if you did the same. I simply feel I owe you absolutely nothing, including my time and attention.

Cordially yours,

Sgian-dubh, stupid shipper

[icanthocusfocus]

Chapter 9 of my Gonachrov Fic

A Summer’s Fruits

It is a brisk night, nippy even. Joe can feel the breeze against his nose, and it makes him shiver. He grips his ice pick within his coat. “You know, Joseph sometimes I think you’re smarter than you let on.”

”Then you must think me some kind of genius!”

”I do, in fact.”

They keep walking.

“Hey Val,”

”Yes Joseph?”

”Did’ya really mean that genius spiel? I never even finished school.” Joe itches his head with that same old pick. It’s never even rusted. He cleans it too often.

”Yeah, Joe, I did.” Valery slows, “By my figuring, you have to be. How did you know?”

”Know what?”

The view really is stellar here. Joe could imagine himself growing up here. If he’d been a child in Naples, everything would’ve been easier. Valery follows his gaze.

”It’s a nice view. A good last sight.”

”I wish I’d been born in Naples. I wouldn’t have been ice pick Joe, then. I’d just be… a Morelli brother.”

Val grips his shoulder, continuing to stare at the horizon. “How did you know where she’d be that night?” He turns to Joe, grabs his other shoulder, and pulls the man close. “How the fuck did you know!” Spit flies onto his cheeks, dripping down Joe’s face like tears.

“Buzz off, Val. Im thinking!” Still, he doesn’t move. Doesn’t even resist when his head is pulled back.

”Was it Andrey?” The question is quieter than the accusations.

“…Na, it wasn’t Andrey. You wanna know how I found her?” He gets louder, “I didn’t even have to look. She wanted me Michailov! Thought we’d run off.”

He’s kneeling now, laughing too. Val’s first punch makes him shake and sway. The kick leaves him on the ground. He holds himself up with shaking arms. “She was a real good time, Ol’ Luce. Wish I’d kept her around a bit longer, but she swam so pretty!”

”I’ll kill you! I’ll fucking kill you!”

It’s true. Joe was never going to make it home that night.

“Fucking do it, but for God’s sake, stop whining.”

He closes his eyes when his head is placed up against the curb. He screams when Valery peels off his nails and places them in a neat pile. He cries when he takes the rest of one finger, and that sits besides the nails. He vomits at the site of bone, something he’s seen so often before. He giggles, just a bit, when he imagines his brain spread out on the pavement.

Valery pauses, hands quivering, and lights up a cigarette. The red end is like a beacon in the night. He leaves wet red streaks on his lighter. Joe wails when he reaches into his pocket and the fabric scrapes his naked nails beds. He clenches his fingers around his ice pick, sobs as he pulls it out. Val doesn’t notice. Doesn’t stop smoking. He can see the tears that meet the corner of his mouth. That turn the cigarette paper gray and damp. Val’s eyes, he knows, are blurry. He holds up the ice pick until he blinks away his tears.

Joseph Morelli is on his knees, one arm hanging loose to his side. In a world where he survived, his shoulder would never have been the same. Neither would his broken smile. He looks like a whole new man. His working arm is holding out the handle of his ice pick to the man that will kill him. His pockets are empty. He played all his cards just to survive past 20.

“You’re pathetic.”

He tries to nod. He tries to smile too, and he can feel it distort his broken features. His smashed nose shifts. His split lip spreads. He’s choking on the blood.

Val nods. Grabs it from his hands and shoves him over. Maybe, Joe thinks, he will reach that place inside that has always been broken. That spot no one else could ever reach. Perhaps this time the ice pick would finally do its job.

He does not float. Michailov makes sure he does not float.

A/N

I know the audio cut out at Goncharov’s line about Ice Pick Joe, but I’ve always heard it as ‘Anyone he wanted to’ rather than ‘anyone WHO wanted to’. Until Mr Scorsese says otherwise, I’ll be sticking by that interpretation.

Prev

[rdng1230]

Sorry op, you awoke the writing demon and it must be satiated.

—-

Sal groans into his whiskey, silently asking god why he sent him such an idiotic best friend with it seems, an equally stupid ex boyfriend.

"You asked him to move in with you? Buckley I thought he said you were smart."

Buck can't help the sad smile that invades his face. "He really said that??"

Sal ignores him, tapping on the bar like he's Columbo laying out a case. "So tell me if I got something wrong here. He kisses you, you go on a date, you pull the no homo routine, ask him for coffee, invite him to your sister's wedding, fucking insane by the way, you spend the next what, 5 or so months happy as clams not asking any deeper questions at all and you think you can just jump into cohabitating with a smile and a Stonewall Spiel?"

Sal straightens up and turns to face Buckley full on. "No foolin, is there an actual goddamn gas leak in your apartment?"

Buck stares back at him sheepishly, either shame or booze flooding his cheeks red. "I may have skipped a few steps."

"Boy you skipped so many steps you took an elevator."

Buck bites the inside of his cheek. "Tommy always made your pep talks sound like, you know, actual pep talks."

Sal takes another sip of his drink and signals for another. "Here's the thing I think you've failed to grasp about ole Tommy Boy. There is nothing more baffling to him than a compliment."

The younger man's brow furrows. "What do you mean?"

And this time Sal actually looks sad. Really sad. "I've been his friend for longer than either of us care to remember. I have seen the best and worst of him and I love him more than anyone apart from my girls. I haven't always been good at showing it, but he is my family."

Sal stares at Buck with a strange mixture of vulnerability and laying down a challenge. One Buck desperately hopes he can meet.

"The only thing I would change about Tommy Kinard is that he would believe me when I tell him that. Would believe anyone when they tell him things like that."

Buck reaches out without thinking to grab Sal's shoulder, and surprisingly the old grump doesn't recoil. Buck can't really say Sal and him are friends. In fact they may be far too similar to ever be friends. But Sal wants nothing but the best for Tommy, and for that, they're on the same team.

"The truth is kid, Tommy has a knack for picking roads he knows are dead ends. He was ready to ride the thing with you till the fucking wheels fell off, but he never expects anyone to stick around. There's nothing scarier to him than potential. To him that's the same thing as loss. And believe me, he's lost enough."

Buck stares at the foggy bar mirror. If he wasn't on his second whiskey, Sal would have made an excellent Roman Centurion. Stalwart and intimidating against anyone who would wish harm to the things he cares about. It's probably what makes him such a good Captain.

"How do I make him believe that he's not gonna lose me? How do I convince him that I want to stay."

Sal gives him a sympathetic glance. "I don't know if he'll ever believe it fully. But the best advice I can offer? Stay anyway. Love him anyway. But you gotta love the real him this time, and believe me he will fight you every step of the way on that."

Buck nods sincerely, his whole body singing at the idea of even seeing Tommy, much less being with him. "I'd fight forever if it means getting him back."

Sal grimaces and juts his chin toward the door. "Get the hell out of here and go get your man Buckley, Unless you wanna gimme a toothache on top of this hangover."

Buck grins, tossing a wad of cash on the counter and gunning it for the exit.

Sal goes up to Buck in a badge and ladder bar and asks him what the FUCK did he do to Tommy

And Buck is taken aback and looks so confused as he replies that Tommy's the one who broke up with him?

And Sal juat goes cool, that doesn't answer my fucking question. What the fuck did you do to him?

[creative-anxious-soul]

another October on tumblr

what can i say....? where can i start? i sure as hell don't know! one thing i DO know for the first time in a very long time is that i am... happy. which is wow who knew? me? little ol 'hope is a dangerous thing for a woman like me' me? but yes.

its shocking because its almost as if i don't know how i got here, but i actually do (again, for once!) I worked so hard and went through so much to get exactly where i am now. idk where my life's past events will lead me to next, but i have major faith in the unknown.

i am so smart, capable, dependable, and beautiful.

I have so much to say about the amazing love of my life Nash, and how much growth and abundance he has chosen to give to me. how we've worked together from day one to acquire things we both want out of our lives, and also helping one another acquire those things we want that have nothing to do with each other or anyone else, simply because seeing each other happy makes us feel the same. I cant wait to see every thing more we accomplish together, the first step being getting cozy in our brand new home <3

enough about him though - because thats not what this is about. i have transcended past the point of being happy and fulfilled only by the state of my current romantic relationship (feeling very secure and golden in mine definitely helps im sure)

over the last year or so i have noticed such deep and enigmatic change within myself, i dont quite understand it but i do know that it feels good. ive spent so many years now battling and thinking about my old self and how i can get back to her but i slowly learned i am never going to get her back. because i am going to get so so so much better than that.

i am going to get the girl whose spirit is curious beyond compare, and realistic to a fault. who dreams very large and has goals so big they could be delusions. i am going to get the girl that used to be those things PLUS the girl that was hurt along the way. plus the girl that was used, abused, tarnished, robbed, raped, and drained. plus the woman that was used, abused, raped, and drained. plus the woman who loved so hard she couldnt see. plus the woman who refused to settle and made plans to break free. plus the woman who sits here now typing this spiel.

i will never be the person i was again and i am so so so grateful for that. she had a lot more about life to learn, and unfortunately the hard way at times. but also the great way. the unbelievable, magical, i will persist no matter what way.

whats next for me is....ME! and a lot of it.