#same goes to cookies lol

[bravewolfvesperia]

/ somehow coffee with favorite cookies tends to be a writing motivator when I am otherwise not motivated.

[andhumanslovedstories]

An intro to doing crosswords for complete beginners

as told by someone who didn’t do any before this year and now has gotten so deeply into them

with examples pulled almost entirely from crosswords published in American publications this week

A crossword is not a measure of general knowledge or intelligence or skill with words anymore than a Mario game is a measure of how good you are at plumbing. It certainly helps to have the same cultural reference points as the puzzle, but you can brute force your way through a lot of it if you just know how crosswords work

Easiest on Mondays and then get harder over the week

The answer is in the same verb tense as the clue (ex. “doesn’t float” is “SINKS” while “didn’t float” is “SANK”)

If there’s an acronym or abbreviation in the clue, the answer will have one as well (ex. “Toothpaste-approving org.” is “ADA” because that the short way of referring to the American Dental Association)

If the answer is in written like a text from a teen girl with her first flip phone, the answer will be a common texting abbreviation (TMI, OMG, LOL, LMAO, BRB, TTYL, etc) (ex. three letter word with clue “i can’t believe u told me that” is “TMI”)

If the clue is in quotes, it’s dialogue and the response should also be dialogue (ex. the clue “‘That’s it for me!’” is “IQUIT”)

An answer can be multiple words, (see above) so some correct answers can make you second guess yourself because it creates letter combos that seem impossible to be in one English (mostly) word or mess you up bc it’s ambiguous where one word ends and another begins (ex. you have the letters “OWFO” and the answer ends up being “PILLOWFORT” or “UDAT” being “BERMUDATRIANGLE”)

Treat clues with a question mark like they’re going to be puns that make you groan so think about other meanings of the words in the clue (ex. “Volumes you can hear?” is “AUDIOBOOKS” or “Not fancy at all?” is “HATE” or “Remained under cover?” is “SLEPTIN”)

Clues that add hedging language line “they could be called…” or one might use this as…” are telling you to think very laterally. These are the ones that make you a little mad when you get them (ex. “They might be said to be dancing or raging” is “FLAMES” or “They admit they might be punched” is “TICKETS”)

The word “maybe” usually indicates the answer will be an example of the clue, not a synonym (ex. “Pet, maybe” is “CAT”)

If a person is in the clue and a person is the answer, the answer will be from the same part of name as the clue (ex. Trevor Noah replaced John Stewart on the Daily Show. So the clue “Stewart’s successor on the Daily Show” is “NOAH” while “John’s successor on the Daily Show” would be “TREVOR”

No word in the clue will be featured in the answer (ex. “What Beyoncé Knowles goes by” could be “ONENAME” but could never be “BEYONCÉ”)

A answer can be a phonetic spelling of a letter (ex. “Epic finale?” is “CEE”)

Not every clue is going to be tricky and clever, don’t rule out an obvious choice just because it’s obvious (ex. “Do ___ disturb” is “NOT”)

Roman numerals pop up a lot but typically only in clues where a Roman numeral makes sense, so “finale of a play?” could be “ACTII” but “Number of Stooges” is not going to be “III”

There’s a ton of really common clues. If you do enough crossword puzzles you recognize them. (ex. Literally almost anything about oil is going to be OPEC, any variations on “things on a smartphone that someone can download and use” is going to be “APPS”, and anything about a european capital city is probably “OSLO”)

If a clue can be about a cookie, the answer is almost certainly “OREO”

[emmyrosee]

Can I request anything food related with Sukuna 🥺

I don’t rlly have anything specific lol but my life has never been the same since finding out that Sukuna canonically loves eating so I’d love to see that in a more wholesome way 😩

“Ah-ah!”

Your wooden spoon comes down and cracks hard on Sukuna’s knuckle that’s trying to get a scoop of cookie dough, a yell of pain ringing in the air. He waves it around before cradling it in his other hand, “are you fucked in the head?!”

“Don’t. Touch,” you say firmly, not wavering under his pout. “These are for Kugisaki. Not for you. Keep your nasty little paws out of the dough.”

“But-!”

“No buts,” you say firmly, waving your spoon at him in warning. “Maybe if you’re nice, I’ll save you some cookies. But do not. Eat. The dough.”

“You’re not my dad-“ he reaches again to try and take a fingerful of dough, only to whip his hand back when you try and whack him again. “Stop it!”

“Stop trying to taint my cookie dough!” You snap, and he grumbles and pouts more. You roll your eyes and stalk over to him, grabbing his hand and pressing a kiss to his red knuckle, “make yourself a sandwich, and I’ll make you a big cookie for dessert.”

“Why don’t you make me one?” He grumbles, and when you smack his chest, he holds his arms out in defense, “not like that, for compensation! God, chill out.” When you thwack him again, he whines, “fucking god, stop hitting me!”

“Maybe don’t say or do things that make me have to hit you,” you shrug. He grumbles something under his breath, still rubbing the sore knuckle, and with a small sigh, you grab a clean spoon from the drawer and scoop a small amount of cookie dough onto it, bringing it over to him to let him take a bite.

He’s wary, eyeing you uncomfortably, “…is this a trick?”

“Would I trick you when it comes to cookies?”

He looks you up and down for a sign that you are kidding, but when you nudge the spoon again at his lips, he takes it into his mouth, eyes closing at the sweet, sticky cookie dough. “‘Fanks,” he says, mouth full.

“Youre welcome,” you say sweetly, tossing your arms around his neck. “You’re just one big baby today, aren’t you?”

“How dare you talk to me the way you do?” he grumbles. He completely goes against himself however as he gives you a small peck on the lips before patting your butt to let you go, “you want a sandwich too? For all your hard work of baking and beating the shit out of me?”

You snicker and turn back to your dough, “no thank you, I’ll make one once I’m done.”

“Fine. See if I’m nice to you again.”

“You seldom are anyways.”

“Fuck you, I’m a delight.”

[hoe4hotchner]

Hi it’s the anonymous from the doctor and the neighbor ideas again (I hope I’m not giving you too much to write cause I have so many more 😭😭)

Here we go again!

Reader and Hotch are neighbors again. Same trope, they’re friends, she watches jack, they have each other’s keys. But I was thinking this time, reader has a bakery down the street, and you know that thing when you nervous you stress eat? Well reader stress bake. Hotch thinks it’s time for the team to meet basically the only friend he has out of work (reader) and decides to do a game night (again lol) for all of them.

Reader was nervous about meeting them, so guess what happened? Her gas bill will be very expensive this month 😭. She goes to hotch's house with like a bunch of Tupperwares full of cookies, cupcakes, macarons, whatever else you can think she could humanly hold (in my mind she’s entering his house with her key with so many containers her vision is obstructed by them) And she’s like all adorably smiley and hoping they like her, like she hasn’t just become each team member’s nutritionist and dentist's deepest nightmare 😭😭

Sweet Treats

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Reader (x BAU)

Warnings: Nothing unless you're allergic to sugar. I think the reader is gender neutral in this, but my eyes have been staring at the words for so long that I might've missed something.

Word count: 881.

A/N: HIIIII anonnn 🫶 I love all your requests!!! They're always sooo cuteeee😍😭 Somehow I managed to get this done 10 minutes before I had to leave for work. So enjoy <3

You paced around your kitchen, the smell of freshly baked muffins, macarons, and meringues filling the air. The island and counters were covered in trays and Tupperware, each filled with sugary treats that you’d been baking over the last few hours out of pure stress. You glanced at the clock—it was almost time to head next door to Hotch’s.

Your heart skipped a beat as you thought about meeting his team. Aaron had told you so much about them and their cases, and from everything you’d heard, they seemed nice. But still, you were nervous; you weren’t good at meeting new people outside of your customers, and these people were important to him. You wanted to make a good impression.

Before you knew it, your kitchen was overflowing with desserts, with no space left unfilled. There was so much that you started to wonder if you'd gone a tad bit overboard, but there was no turning back now. You started packing everything into containers, stacking them as carefully as possible.

“This should be enough, right?” you murmured to yourself, eyeing the mountain of sweets. How you were going to get them safely next door was still a mystery to you.

Trying your best to gather all the containers, your arms were loaded with so many that you could barely see over the top or out the sides. You took a deep breath as you headed out the door and made your way across your front lawn. It was quicker this way instead of going onto the sidewalk. You knew Aaron didn’t mind you stepping on his lawn.

Balancing everything precariously, you managed to fumble your key into the lock and let yourself in. “Aaron?” you called out, your voice slightly muffled by the stack of Tupperware in front of your face.

“In here,” his voice replied from the living room.

You shuffled toward the sound of his voice, hoping you wouldn’t trip over anything along the way. When you finally reached the living room, you found Aaron standing with his team, who all turned to look at you as you awkwardly maneuvered through the door.

“Hi!” you chirped, a little too enthusiastically, as you nearly toppled over under the weight of all the containers. You could barely see their faces, but you were pretty sure they were staring at you.

“You didn’t have to bring all of this.” Aaron quickly moved to help you, taking a few containers from your arms. He sent you a soft smile, but there was a hint of amusement in his voice, trying to figure out how you’d even managed to get out of your own house with no vision and basically no arms to help you.

“I, uh, got a little nervous,” you admitted with a bashful grin as you finally set down the remaining containers on the coffee table. “So… I baked. A lot.”

The team members exchanged glances, their initial surprise quickly giving way to grins and curious glances at the mountain of sweets you had brought along.

“You made all of this?” asked a woman with long, dark hair, whom you recognized as Emily from the pictures Aaron had shown you.

“Y-Yeah.” You felt your nerves bubble up again. “I hope you like them.”

“Are you kidding?” Derek smiled, already reaching for a cupcake. “This is amazing!”

“Did you make these from scratch? They look perfect,” Spencer asked, peering at the macarons with wide eyes.

You nodded, feeling your face heat up at the compliments. “I’m just really glad I could share them with you guys.”

As everyone started sampling the desserts, you noticed Aaron watching you with a fond look in his eyes. He stepped closer, leaning in to speak quietly, just for you to hear.

“You didn’t need to do all of this to impress them, you know. They were going to love you no matter what.”

Your heart fluttered at his words, but before you could respond, Garcia bounced over, vibrating with excitement. “Oh my gosh, you are like a real-life fairy godmother! These are delicious! Can I be your best friend?”

You laughed, feeling the last of your nerves melt away. “I think I can manage that.”

The rest of the night passed in a blur of laughter, games, and way too much sugar. The team insisted on sampling everything, and by the end of the night, they were all raving about your baking skills. You felt like you’d known them forever, and the warm, welcoming energy they exuded made you feel right at home among them.

As the night wound down, Aaron walked you back to your house, the others busy chatting in the living room. “Thank you for doing this,” he said softly, his eyes full of that same warmth you’d come to love. “You really didn’t have to go to all that trouble.”

You smiled up at him, feeling your heart swell with affection. “I wanted to. They’re important to you, so they’re important to me.”

He paused as if considering his next words carefully. “You’re important to me, too. I’m glad you finally got to meet them.”

Your breath caught, and for a moment, you just stood there, feeling the weight of his words sink in. Then you smiled, a little shyly. “Me too.”

Consider linking or reblogging if you enjoy my work

[ssahotchnerr]

Hihi I am also here with a Christmas hc/suggestion 👀: you and Aaron keep the kids’ presents at grandpa Dave’s bc you know otherwise they’d go on a hunt around the house to try to find them. So every Christmas Eve, Dave comes to hang out and before he leaves he’s like “Aaron do you want to walk me out 👀👀👀” and then Aaron has to sneak the presents back in the house while you distract Jack and Ellie

STOP omg yes!!!!!!!

you're the one who figures out they've been snooping - you noticed things in multiple closets have been knocked over, items are in the front while they're usually in the back, and mention it to aaron. you come to him and you're like, "i think they've been looking for the presents 😳" all flabbergasted LOL. it's funny all the same, it's a rite of passage as a kid, but you don't want any surprises being ruined, or for the realization that santa isn't real to strike - jack still has a few years left in him, and ellie's still practically a baby 😭

hehe aaron finally finds them in the act - you're doing some last minute shopping for his gift 🤭, while he's watching them at home. the two of them have been watching a movie, he's just getting miscellaneous work things done, and when he goes in to check on them, they're not on the couch where he left them, movie's still playing on the screen. and sure enough, he finds the two of them looking under your shared bed.

hehe aaron's standing there with his arms crossed, face all :| and is like, "what are the two of you doing??"

ellie's still toddler age, and loves nothing more than listening to her big brother and following him around �� so jack will put the blame on her 😭 (not in a mean way, a brother way) he innocently looks up at his father and says, "ellie wanted to 🥺" and aaron's all "🤨 yeah alright, this is ellie's idea" LOL

luckily they didn't find anything, but the two of you still bring the presents to dave's, and drop off any before coming home after being out and about.

hehe so when it's christmas eve, aaron gives you that look like, dave's coming soon and they can't see what he's bringing. SO you grab the two of them all excitedly and ask who wants to make some cookies for santa!!!!! which is the best distraction because the kitchen has some distance between the front door, so aaron and dave can easily sneak in and out, head up the stairs with the presents, all while jack and ellie are thoroughly entertained and distracted. and if they somehow notice dave, and they do - he obviously can't stop by anf not hang out with them - you can easily say he came over to help with the cookies 🥰🥰🫢

[brittle-doughie]

I hunger for... yandere cookie run...

So, imagine yandere ancients cookies meeting their good old friend (who they still have a huge crush on) traveling with the brave gang!

And when any of them tries to convince reader to stay with them, Y/N cookie immediately turn down the offer and said that they'll stick with the brave gang until dark enchantress cookie is finally defeated.

I hope this ask goes through💔 and I'll be fish anon from now on

-🐟

Gotta Go (The Ancient Cookies)

Pure Vanilla Cookie and Black Raisin Cookie would want to thank Y/N Cookie by asking if they wanted to stick around and help with the Vanilla Kingdom.

Since DE is defeated for now, you actually grant this request and stick around with Brave and the others to help patch up things in the place…all the while Pure Vanilla and Black Raisin crowd you wanting to chat, lol.

Barely having enough time to process the dragon being defeated had you being scooped up and squeezed tightly by Hollyberry Cookie. You were just so cute fighting the dragon like that, Princess Cookie would agree!

Jungleberry and Royal Berry would ask if you had to stay for a celebratory feast, it was the least they could do to commend you for your efforts. Hollyberry is there to try and butter you up, but you had DE to stop and didn’t have the time. The Teo royals understand, but Hollyberry is insisting she comes along to keep you safe!

Dark Cacao Cookie couldn’t thank you enough for the efforts you and the group put to ward off the licorice threat and snap him out of his corruption. He insists that a warrior like you would be at home in the Dark Cacao Kingdom.

Caramel Arrow would insist on Cacao’s offer, saying that by staying, you’d be a constant inspiration for her and the other warriors to train and fight harder. This gets DCA on the protective side, his asking of you to come to the kingdom being urgent, he did not want to leave you to get twisted into an evil mockery of yourself.

You wouldn’t realize it yet, but Golden Cheese Cookie had gotten more attached to you then you expected, it seemed not even GC was immune to the effect you had on cookies. She focused on you and how you were doing much more than the group, something that would annoy Black Raisin to no end.

It would all come to a head where she’d offer you to be a permanent resident to her kingdom, but you had to refuse, saying that DE had to be stopped no matter what, but GC insisted! She grew worried, this war shouldn’t matter more to you than your own life. You should just STAY HERE where you couldn’t get hurt under her watch, she’s not letting you leave out of fear that she’ll endure the same pain she had endured years ago…

White Lily Cookie didn’t like the sound of your plan, were you really going to face Dark Enchantress Cookie? It sounded too dangerous for you, you can get hurt or something even worse! She’ll help you, but it meant that you had to stay back as she and the others handled DE.

But you refused, you had been on this mission since the start, you weren’t going to back out now. But White Lily believes that your life can be more fruitful if you remained here…with her. So please….stay. You couldn’t, you wanted to see this until the end. The others were counting on you…

White Lily wanted to protest, when she realized that you’re in a crosshairs of a particular group of cookies….

[letshaikyuu]

pretty setter squad (kageyama, akaashi, oikawa) with their s/o post-practice

a/n: lol hello, I honestly just come here when I am knees deep in uni shit and I should be writing a paper rn but I am writing this heh. hope you all are happy and healthy, and wishing you a lovely month of May soon!

warning: oh definitely some grammar mistakes so i apologize if that triggers you :3

🎀────────────🎀

KAGEYAMA TOBIO

y'all know our boy is dead tired after practice and needed much persuading to finish practice, let alone come home. he only wishes to jump in the shower, eat a hearty meal, lay down in bed, and not move. most of the time he does forget to text you once he's back home, but it's mostly because he's dead tired and wants to chill. he'd be super confused and apologetic at the same time if you were disappointed and/or anxious if he didn't text you that he was home.

if you two don't live together, I imagine him finishing his post-practice routines and then laying down in bed with his washed hair wetting the pillow while he waits for you to video call him. I don't think he'd be the one to initiate a conversation first, especially when he is one minute away from falling asleep, but he does admit that hearing your voice before bed is the best thing ever. while on call, you would do most of the talking, while he nods and occasionally chuckles in amusement, until ultimately dozing off while on call. make sure to take a lot of screenshots of that face because he can either have the most peaceful look on his face and you just have to have that angelic face in your gallery; or he can have the most ridiculous type of face on, with a lil drool, some snoring happening...

if you two do live together, you'd be greeted with a sweaty body just dropping its total weight on you because he's just so tired and also wants to annoy you with him being all sweaty and smelly on you. it's difficult to actually get him to move, especially because he gets rather comfortable in such a position. when you finally get him off, he goes off to shower and spends so much time there you're pretty sure he falls asleep there. he asks you to prepare a hot cup of milk for him once he gets out. you'd get such a gentle kiss on your cheek or lips because he is already dozing off and it'd be such an adorable sight, especially with his freshly washed and dried hair tickling the softness of your cheek and the smell of his body wash enveloping the both of you.

ngl, he would easily fall asleep without you in bed because he's just dead tired lol

AKAASHI KEIJI

he never forgets to call and/or text you once he's done and out of the gym because he knows you'd be worried otherwise. if you live together, he makes sure to ask you if you need anything from the convenience store and also asks you to prepare a hot cup of tea for him (for the two of you if you are also a tea drinker). even if you say you don't need anything from the store, he stops by and buys your favorite snacks and some of his own. i do think his favorite thing to do post-practice is to sit down on the couch with you and talk about your day. i do headcanon him to have a sweet tooth, so he is enjoying that cup of tea with some crackers or cookies and definitely enjoys hearing some of your tea ngl.

even though he is super tired, he cannot fall asleep without you beside him. he finds it interesting how dependent he has become on you, especially if you have moved in together recently. if he is not super tired, he'd move to the bed with a book by his side and read until you're finished with your evening routine and lie down. if he is exhausted, then he forgoes the book, he then lays down and toys with your pillowcase so he doesn't fall asleep. if you take long he definitely closes his eyes and then jolts awake once you get in bed, but he only pulls you closer, kisses you, and falls asleep.

akaashi who does not live with you is fairly similar. while walking back to his house, he'd call you and chat with you until he arrives. you'd end the call while he finishes his shower (maybe not) and dinner, and he'd call you right back once he's done. he then sits down in bed with a cup of tea and a cookie or two on his bedside table, his phone in an active call with you. he may be tired but makes sure to listen to you intently, and when he is almost falling asleep, he apologizes for not paying more attention to you (because he's such a sweetheart like that ngl) and then gives you one of those air kisses before turning around and ultimately falling asleep.

OIKAWA TOORU

he ALWAYS calls you when he's done with practice because this guy has tea to spill from the day. he is so enthusiastic and vibrant that you would think he went out for a cup of coffee and not coming back from volleyball practice. legend says (aka iwaizumi) that he is a part of the Walking Dead in the locker room but always puts on the best version of himself when you're around. when he's finally at the front of his house, he makes sure to be as quiet as possible so he doesn't wake his family up and then says he'll call you once he's in bed.

now, Oikawa does sometimes fall asleep without showering or anything which is definitely a shocking statement for someone as tidy and clean as Oikawa, I can easily imagine him just face-planting on his bed and saying he'd get up in 5 minutes and just falling asleep lol. however, that's a rare occasion and also he'd wake up once you text/call him anyway. you will be on a video call while he's doing his skincare routine because he needs to show you that soft-ass skin and all his products.

oikawa who lives with you is very much needy once he's back home. he wants a hug as soon as he's home because he misses you so much and he'd like to have dinner together with you. i don't think he's the best cook out there, but he knows how to prepare some bomb-ass meals for pre-/post-workouts. of course, if you're not up for that he can stomach a cup of ramen. the night is not complete without him spilling the tea on every mishap that happened during practice and also inquiring about your day. he falls asleep on the couch and spills whatever food he's holding in his hands. this leads to him startling awake and screaming at the mess he's made...it's never a dull moment with this guy.

🎀────────────🎀

[thegloomybat]

This post is gonna be a bit lazy ik i can find more stuff but ima sleep soon. So here are some low cal sweet stuff!!!

I bet you guys already know about fiber one. Theyre so good tho, 70 cals per brownie. They also have donuts 100 cals each. They have bars too that go from 70-90+

I’VE TRIED THESE THEYRE SO GOOD AND PRETTY BIG AND LIKE?? IK YOU GUYS SEE THAT.

These are sugar free but i can’t even imagine if they had sugar bc these are already so sweet! And yummy straight up tastes like vanilla and tbh, the cals are chill bc 12 is a lot since theyre pretty sweet

Dude i HAVE to try this bc??? I LOVE chocolate it’s my downfall, and 1/3 bar is only 60 cals???

Serving size is 20g, never had these or even knew about these but 🤔

You might already know about Diana’s frozen banana chocolate bites/ the frozen chocolate dipped banana. The bites are 80 cals for 3 (32g) and the banana is 130 (about 65g). But this one is 100 per 2 pieces (25g). The dianas bites are lowkey small, the banana is a reasonable size i have no idea about this one but🤷‍♀️

YOO I FW THESE HEAVYYY THEYRE SO YUMMYYY A PACK IS 90 WHICH IS LIKE, EHHH. BUT THIS FLAVOR ESPECIALLY I’VE ONLY TRIED THIS ONE, CINNAMON, AND COOKIES N CREAM BUT THIS ONE>>>

DUDEE!! I NEED to try these, this one specifically is 100 cals per 25 pieces!! They have peach rings that come in a bag it says 100 cals, idk how much it is individually but im guessing around the same amount. AND THEY HAVE GUMMY WORMSSS. 110 per bag, the bags are 50g. Trolli gummy worms are 100 cals for 8 pieces in a 32g bag. HUGE difference tbh.

AHHH THEY DONT LET ME ADD MORE PICS SO I’LL JUST WRITE.

Catalina Crunch keto friendly sandwich cookies (fake oreos lol), they have a few different flavors but the vanilla one is 90 cals for 2 cookies, i tried the mint one and it was actually rlly good, so🤷‍♀️

Clio mini greek yogurt bars with chocolate coating is 70 cals for the vanilla flavor, they also have more. Never tried but looks chill

Yo how did i not know sugar free reeces mini cups are 110 cals for 3 pieces, but quest also has their own version for 150 cals per 4 pieces, so they’re basically the same amount per piece but quest has protein, quest also has their own reeces cups for 190/200 per cup, whereas reeces have like 230. Idk a little goes a long way for me

I believe that’s all i can think of rn. SLEEPTIME GOODNIGHT!!

[jamneuromain]

Stalker Lady pt. 1

Simon "Ghost" Riley x Reader (You)

Word Count: ~1.5k

Warning: Mean!Simon Riley, Voice (PORN) actor!Simon Riley, patron!reader, neighbor!AU, description of audio porn and stalking behavior. bad language word people we're talking about audio porn here

Summary: You meet Simon unexpectedly. Unfortunately, he thinks you are a stalker.

A/N: This fic is my rehab-going-back-into-writing fic. And it's the first time I'm writing for "Ghost" I've honestly never played COD. But here's my idea of the scary (not really lol) simon ghost riley :3

After enduring your rented noisy flat for nearly six months, the construction of your new house is finally completed, which is a total relief. You now have a house of your own.

It’s a small place in the suburbs, with a handful of neighbors on the same block, and a decent lawn that you need not pay too much attention to besides mowing occasionally. More importantly, the quietness.

You’ve settled for this house because of the friendly neighbors and the quietness around the place. Most houses are properly wrapped up in thick walls and heavy planks so no noises would escape. The only sounds that constantly appear from outside of the window are the birds chirping and the laughs and talks from family and friends.

This.

This is the perfect place for you.

You met the Pinewood Residential Community Committee (Really? A community committee? You could be in tears) the day you moved in. A group of five that consisted of three of the actual committee and two of your neighbors. The house to your right lives a delightful family whose wife Sarah came to visit and brought you homemade cookies. The house to your left harbors a tall silent man called Simon who has dark circles under his eyes (You doubt the house was enough for him because he looked like a Tall-nut that could poke through the roof). Most of the time he just nodded to whatever the rest of them were chatting about. He gave you a brand-new Bluetooth speaker about the size of your palm, saying that it might come in handy if you want to play music without carrying your phone around the house.

You were grateful.

For the committee. For the friendly neighbors. For the speaker, even.

Until the day you decide to try this speaker out.

Present day, today, this very hour, you have been fighting with this unruly speaker.

You have pushed buttons. Connecting it to the charger and unplugged it twice. Flipped the on/off switch. Turned the volume thingy at the top to the maximum. Turned up the phone volume, too.

Nothing.

No sound coming out.

While your phone mocks at you by showing you that you have already connected it and no sound is coming out.

You googled, searched, and tried reading the instructions, but nothing helped.

You sigh. Snatch the speaker and the small piece of paper with instructions and head to your neighbor’s place.

Simon is just finishing up his work for today.

It’s not a job, per se, but trades his time and patience for some of the allowances.

Actually, scratch that, he has been making more from this not-job job than spending time in the military, which says something.

He has been considering making this job a little permanent, aside from his part-time work to deliver posts and mails.

He starts the day early, driving his van to the local post office, loading the bunch of stuff onto his backseat, and finishing driving around the blocks at around 1 pm. Works a little on his side job, goes to bed at 9 or 10, simple as that.

He leaves the recording room of his house, only pausing his steps to the showers when he hears something coming from his living room…?

He heads back to the recording room, making sure his laptop is turned off, his phone is on airplane mode (which has stayed that way for a while, he must add, to prevent it from interrupting his recording), and his iPad certainly has not connected to his Bluetooth. Which is … odd?

Because why is one of his recordings playing on his Bluetooth speaker?

Simon winces at his own grunts and moans from the speaker. He’s not particularly proud of it, okay, that he is a member of an audio porn production team. He takes time recording himself reading various scripts of monologues that end up taking the imaginative figure of a woman to bed.

Yes, he records himself twice a week.

Yes, he makes male-for-female porn.

Yes, he never shows his face and has a silly stage name called “Ghost”.

Yes, he does (very occasionally) custom-made fan audio for those generous patrons.

Yes, this is a custom-made audio playing on his Bluetooth – wait what?

A few soft knocks land on his door before he can comprehend what mystical force is toying with his speaker.

“Brilliant.” He grumbles to himself under his breath, “Fucking brilliant.”

Now he has another thing to tend to besides figuring out his haunted speaker.

He turns the volume down, shoving the small gadget into the sofa cushions before it can be haunted again.

Opening the door.

And there you are.

“Oh! Um, hi!” You are stepping down the porch, thinking that he must be busy, but the noise of the locks startles you a little, turn around to see your neighbor Simon, “Hi, I live next door. Uh, I moved here about a week ago?”

Cute.

He thinks to himself.

Technically, his first impression was supposed to be a week ago when he visited your place for the first time, but he missed his nap time so the thirty minutes spent there consisted of him keeping himself awake – hardly, more like keeping his head straight and eyes open, which he failed, for at least a dozen times or so.

Rude. He knows. But he is not the kind of social butterfly either, so you kinda get what you deserve by moving in next to him.

“Yeah.” He grunts, his mind still on the fucking Bluetooth, “Wha’d you need, luv?”

“I think this speaker is … I don’t know what’s wrong with it, it just … no sound coming out of it.” You chew on your lower lip sheepishly, “Would you mind helping out, please?”

“Tried to dial the volume on your phone louder?” He raised his eyebrows at you.

“Yeah, I did, I-” You fumble with your phone, giving him a moment to look at the speaker under your arm.

One glance at the Bluetooth speaker in your hand, same brand, same model, but different color, connects the dots for Simon in his mind.

It is obvious as daylight that you accidentally connected to his speaker.

“I’ll try turn it up-” You push the buttons on the side of your phone, turning the volume up to the loudest.

And a guttural groan comes from his couch.

“Fuckin’ hell, sweet’art.” His couch moans loudly, “You’re killin’ me with that sweet cunny-”

Simon acts quickly, yanks you inside the house by the arm, and slams the door shut.

“That’s my speaker.” He says, quietly.

Your stupid fingers finally manage to turn the volume down. You completely forgot about the audio playing on your phone – your favorite audio, the one you have listened to and cummed to for at least a handful of times. Your face instantly goes aflame. You were planning some quality time with your toy, but not this! You are not connecting to your neighbor’s speaker and standing at his doorstep!

The deadly silence is eating you up.

“Um. Guess it’s not … wrong?” You let out a dry chuckle, your mind a puddle of jellyfish that zaps your neurons into firing the wrong sparks, “I’ll, um, go upstairs – my home, my place, I mean. Thank you for tonight.” Your face scrunches together out of sheer embarrassment.

His iron grasp on your arm is unwavering.

He has some patrons online, but the fact that you are one of them and live next door is … a bit too much of a coincidence.

“You a stalker or wha’?” He growls at you. His eyes flash a dangerous glint as he recalls what had happened to one of his friends, John, with the stage name “Soap”. Soap works with Simon in the small group of audio porn production called “Team 141”. Soap was careless about his whereabouts, leading to a crazy woman piecing together information and ambushing him when he gets home from his day job.

“Wha- what?” You sound completely baffled. “What are you even talking about?”

“Don’t play dumb, sweet’art. Doesn’t work like ‘at.” Simon eyes at the now-silent speaker on his couch, before returning his gaze to your startled expression, which is indeed fright, but for different reasons than he’d think of – the fear of being found that you stalked to his house. “Peachy? Peach? ‘s that your Discord name? Coz this is a specialized piece, custom-made. An’ I made it myself.”

Your eyes widen at the confession. Your Discord name is indeed, Peachyyy,with two extra Y, and it hits you that this man you are confronting, who is confronting you, might be the one who sent this audio as a special gift to you, their patron.

Every patron for the Team 141 could designate a voice actor for their custom-made audio. When you were notified that you could also participate in deciding the actor of the audio, without a second to stop and think, you chose your favorite one of “Team 141”.

“Ghost”.

Simon “Ghost” Riley let out a cold smirk. He believes he has this all figured out.

“I won’t report you. Not yet. But if I find you ten feet within my vicin’ty,” His teeth bared, sharp canines ready to rip something apart, throat rumbling like a true animal, “I’ll get your pretty arse locked up and thrown into jail. Run along now, stalker lady.”

Monster! You shriek. Or perhaps that’s a pitiful whimper under his massive shadow, and flee from his grasp.

Part 2

[drysdalesworld]

ducks, ducks, ducks

jamie drysdale x fem!hughes!reader

social media au set before injury & trade! (still salty about it)

y/n.hughes just posted!

liked by adamfantilli, uoregon, yourbestie, and more

y/n.hughes: ducks, ducks, ducks 🦆

tagged: yourbestie, anaheimducks, uoregon

( loading comments! )

yourbestie: ducks!!

userone: the best duck there is

usertwo: fr!

userthree: who? jamie or y/n?

userone: y/n 100% userthree

trevorzegras: i’m still petty over the fact that you didn’t hug me first

y/n.hughes: i would’ve if you didn’t take forever to leave the locker room

jamie.drysdale: you were too slow z

trevorzegras: ☹️

userfour: trev being petty over the fact that he wasn’t one of the first people to hug y/n after the game has me ROLLING 😭

userfive: fr!! i love how jokingly possessive he is over the hughes siblings. it’s too funny

usersix: esp over jack and y/n. it’s hilarious 😂

yourroommate: how much sleep did you get this weekend?

y/n.hughes: none ☺️

yourroommate: babes

yourbestie: she literally brought her suitcase to the party so she could immediately go straight to the airport afterwards

userseven: stop!! that’s so cute!!

y/n.hughes: worth it tho

jamie.drysdale: loved having you at my game baby 🤍

jackhughes: is that why you ignored my facetime earlier 🥲

y/n.hughes: yes. i had other priorities

jackhughes: wow. so your older brother isn’t a priority? i see how it is 😒

y/n.hughes: dramatic ass

jackhughes: i’m telling mom!

usereight: y/n knows where her priorities lie lol

_quinnhughes: hope you had fun sis!

y/n.hughes: i did! thank you quinny <33

lhughes_06: take notes jackhughes

jackhughes: i’m being attacked at all sides aren’t i

colecaufield: when are you going to visit 😖

y/n.hughes: bake me your moms homemade cookies and then we’ll talk

colecaufield: done ✅

anaheimducks: the best duck we know!

markestapa: visit us next!!

tyler_duke5: on my knees begging

alexturcotte: hope oregon’s treating you well girl hughes!!

y/n.hughes just posted!

liked by trevorzegras, rutgermcgroarty, and more

y/n.hughes: why do i have to be such a studious gf that’s pursuing her college degree and not a stay at home gf 😫

tagged: jamie.drysdale

( loading comments ! )

trevorzegras: just drop out. problem solved

userone: that’s not

jackhughes: are you encouraging my sister to drop out of college z 🤨

trevorzegras: just saying j. it’s an easy fix

lhughes_06: that’s what you get for double majoring in english and communications with a minor in political science girlie

usertwo: did luke just refer to his sister as girlie?

userthree: yes, yes he did

y/n.hughes: at least i’ll have a degree in my name & not just on the back of a jersey

trevorzegras: DAYUMM BABY HUGHES YOU JUST GOT BURNED

y/n.hughes: same goes for you trev

userfour: oop

jamie.drysdale: because you’re a smart and hardworking girl baby ☺️

y/n.hughes: awww jimmy!! i love you so much ❤️❤️

userfive: are we just going to brush over the fact that y/n is a double major with a minor?? babes is getting NO sleep

y/n.hughes: ZERO

y/n.hughes: sleep is for the weak!

usersix: praying for your health & sanity bbg

userfive: get some sleep girl!! it’s important for your health!

yourbestie: get that degree babes!! be the most studious wag ever!!

yourroommate: FRFR

anaheimducks: getting the jack ready rn

luca.fantilli: the smartest hughes

lhughes_06: offense taken

y/n.hughes: thank you luca <3 speaking the truth fr

rutgermcgroarty: speaking of the smart hughes, can you help me with my essay y/n.hughes 😖

y/n.hughes: ofc rut! i’ll call you at 9

rutgermcgroarty: bless thank you 🙏

elhughes: so proud of you baby 💚💚

y/n.hughes: thank you mama!! i love you so much 🤍

jackhughes: the smartest sister i have

_quinnhughes: she’s the only sister you have idiot

jackhughes: okay and ???

userseven: the pic of jamie tying her shoe 😭😭

masonmctavish23: the most studious person i know!

trevorzegras: idk why but i feel offended

y/n.hughes: babes, we all know you practically have an iq of a grape

jackhughes: she isn’t wrong z 😂

y/n.hughes just posted to their story!

caption: last date night with lover boy until thanksgiving break jamie.drysdale :(

trevorzegras replied!

finally! i no longer have to deal with you and jimbo’s lovey dovey grossness 🤢

jk! love you 🫶���� you make jimmy more tolerable

jamie.drysdale replied!

i’m going to miss you baby! :( study hard & take care of yourself lovey 🤍

lhughes_06 replied!

since when were you NOT coming home for turkey break??! 🤨

[lasciviouspoison]

omg hey guyssss!!! this was literally written off the fly, lol. each time i get 🍃 i think abt plug eren and how he’d be obsessed with the pretty college girl he serves to. tw: plug!eren x chubby reader, implied inexperienced reader, implied black reader (anyone can read!!), afab!reader, and, obviously, anything else i missed. not proof read cause idgaf :p

ps. y’all i loved writing this and i love my man. missing him bad :(

plug!eren that loves serving u, his prettiest customer. always makes sure to respond to ur text within the same minute, no matter the condition he’s in.

plug!eren who gets so happy when u ask him to teach u how to roll. each time he’s served u, he’s just brought u pre-rolls since u never bothered to ask for any other rolling materials. but this time, u finally caved and asked him to teach u, saying, “i’m just tired of spending my money on a multiple pre-rolls everyday. i wanna roll for myself” - mind u, eren hasn’t ever charged u.

plug!eren that sees u eyeing him intensely when he starts licking down the sheet, green eyes challenging yours each time he goes to toast the j. he got off on hearing your breath shudder slightly each time he gave it a lick, laughing silently to himself.

plug!eren who watches you smile brightly upon not ripping the sheet (you went through 3 before getting it right). he critiques your j as the two of you hit it, saying u only really needed to work on your mouth piece. however, it was hard for u to digest anything he was saying over the loudness of your thoughts. you couldn’t get the image of eren licking the j out of ur head, wondering if he’d take that much care with u. head between ur legs, using his tongue with the utmost precision. god it’d feel so good -

“whatcha thinkin’ bout pretty girl?” eren’s voice pulls you out of ur thoughts and u smile, not trusting urself enough to express ur feelings without flat out telling him you wanted to fuck.

“i’m just… thinking about everything… you know?” he laughs at the slow pace and raspiness of your voice.

“hmm.. want rennie to make the thoughts go away?”

your head lolls onto the back of the couch and your bra-less chest points toward the sky. he can see the outline of your pierced nipples through your baby pink tank top and he sighs.

the two of you finally make eye contact once more and you lean your head up towards his, eyes deadlocked on his lips.

“please.”

that was all eren needed to hear before engulfing you in his arms. he pulls you onto his lap and runs his hands up the sides of your body, taking extra time to trace the chub that outlines ur tummy.

he drags his thumbs over your nipples causing your body to jerk. he smiles slightly and flicks his eyes up to yours, silver eyebrow piercing glittering in the warm livingroom lighting. he peppers kisses along your jawline before finally kissing your lips. you can’t help but think about how soft his lips are and it makes u let out a soft moan.

he breaks the kiss but never stops rubbing on you, “you taste so sweet. is it ya lipgloss?”

you smile, “yeah. it’s that glossier shit. cookie butter.”

he kisses you again, running his tongue over your lips once he breaks it once more, “i bet your pussy’s sweeter than this though.”

before you can respond, he reaches down into your shorts and plays with the waistband of your panties. rubbing his fingers over the outline of your cunt, causing you to shiver each time.

eren kisses your lips once more and finally touches your bare pussy. once his fingers find your clit, he makes the smallest circles and your hips jerk. he can feel you begin to pull away from the kiss, but his mouth follows you, preventing you from complaining.

he begins to apply a bit more pressure and you ease up in his grip once more. his fingers then travel down further and begin to make their way inside you. unable to hold yourself together, you let out a slight “fuck” and eren groans.

“you’re so fuckin wet. you mus’ really like me, huh baby”. he licks his lips and kisses your neck.

“yes ren… liked you since i first seen you.”, you admit.

eren pulls his head from your neck and grips your cheeks, forcing you to meet his eyes. “aww. baby had a crush on ‘er plug. gonna make this pussy feel so good for you, ‘kay?”

after a small yes, eren lays you down gently on your couch and begins to pull your shorts and panties down. your hands go to cover yourself and he pins them to your chest. he then pulls your tank top over your head and leaves the material loosely around your wrists.

immediately after, eren removes his shirt and your eye to eye with his tatted stomach and chest. you knew by his arms he had a lot of ink, but it was never assumed to go this far. his tattoos were so sexy though, they made your mouth water.

eren then began his assault on your neck once more, this time gradually making his way down your body. he ran his tongue over your nipples, releasing each with an obnoxiously loud pop.

as he made his way down your stomach, you could feel him start to lick down your body, making a point to leave a trail of red splotches in his wake.

when his eyes deadlock on your pussy, you can feel eren’s dick jump in his pants. he takes his thumb and pulls the hood of your vagina up, taking his sweet time in admiring your pink pussy.

he licks his lips and smirkss at you before diving head first in between your legs. his long, pink tongue swirls over your clit so gently, it makes you see stars. he licks you just like the sheet, so slowly that it takes your breath away.

he sucks gently on your clit and your hands reach down to run through his hair. your fingers wrap around the root and pull slightly, causing him to groan into your pussy.

his hand runs up your leg and you feel his middle and index finger push into your walls, gently caressing your g-spot.

by this point, your writhing so hard against the bed eren’s had to use all of his strength to restrain you with one hand. and while you knew eren could overpower you, having firsthand proof made you all the more wet.

with a few more licks to your clit, eren found you suddenly tensing up against his tongue, small body shaking and convulsing around his tongue as your orgasm overpowered your senses.

“pretty baby’s never came this hard huh? s’okay, you got somebody to handle you now. i’ll make this cunt cum everyday. my perfect girl.”

with the combination of eren’s dirty words and his gentle caresses against your nipples, it was extremely hard for you to ground yourself within reality. he was too good at sex, especially for someone as inexperienced as you.

eren finally rises and removes his jeans. his black calvin’s cling to his hips and muscular thighs as he drags you by your ankle to the edge of your couch.

he pulls down his boxers and his dick hits his stomach with a dull thud, angry red tip leaving a bit of pre where it made contact with his stomach.

he presses your legs against your body and grips his dick, hard. he runs it through your fold a few times, using the slight curve of his dick to hit your clit each time he got close. he tapped his dick against your clit a few times, and finally slipped it in.

with the two of you simultaneously gasping, eren’s grip on your hips got tighter, desperately trying to will himself to not fully sheath himself inside of you. as he slowly slipped in, he could feel your pussy twitch against him, forcing him to thumb at your clit.

“need ya to calm down baby. gonna squeeze me to death” his voice is rough and restrained, similar to his hips.

you respond, breathless and weak, “m’tryin. feel you s’deep”

his eyes flick up to yours, “oh yeah? where ya feel me baby?”

your head peaks up slightly and eren takes a look at your fucked out face. lips wet, red, and swollen, eyes watery with rosy cheeks. you were so beautiful, he never wanted to take his eyes off of you. but, he had a more pressing matter at hand.

your hand reaches down and presses on your stomach, signifying to eren where his dick is inside you. however, you choke out a moan and add onto his ever growing ego, “but i swear ren, i feel you in my throat. you’re just so - fuck - you’re so big” placing much emphasis on big.

his eyes roll into the back of his skull as he looses all composure. his hips snap relentlessly into yours, bullying his cock into your tight pussy. by this point, eren is not only lost in the feeling of your cunt, but knowing that he needs to feel you cum around him.

he keeps a hand locked onto your jaw, forcing you to keep eye contact with him. you can see how feral he is behind his eyes and it makes you gush. he’s like a wild animal and it turns you on way more than you ever imagined.

with a particular thrust, eren hits that soft spot inside of you and your legs instinctively lock around his hips. the worldless confirmation was all he needed to continue to hit that special spot inside of you. as the speed of his hips increases, he finally reaches his peak, with that familiar pulse of your pussy shortly following.

a particularly loud “fuck” leaves your mouth at the same times eren grits out your name. his hips operate on autopilot, snapping back into your cunt at a jagged pace.

once eren returns to earth, he sees the white ring of cream you left around the base of his cock. he swipes two fingers down and places them to your lips. “suck”, is all that leaves his mouth and you follow his command.

as eren slowly pulls out of you, your head lolls against the couch and you finally feel yourself catch a breath.

when eren returns, he uses a warm rag to wipe you up before helping you put your clothes back on. after he follows suit, he picks you up bridal style and carries you to your room.

he sets you down and pulls back your baby pink duvet, tucking you into the blankets. you reach your hand up to him and grab his shirt sleeve, confusion and hurt dancing behind your eyes.

eren kneels beside your bed and pets your hair, “i’m not runnin out on ya y/n. i jus gotta do my job. i’ll be back once im finished, promise.” he gives you a gentle kiss on the lips, and you can hear his shoes scuff against the hardwood floor as your eyes close.

however, hours later, you’re awoken to the sound of knocks at your door and your phone ringing; it’s eren.

“hello?” you answer, voice groggy from sleep.

eren chuckles slightly and lets out a breath, “told you i’d be back ma. lemme in”.

[stars-tonight]

Hiiii!! Love the event that you are doing! Sounds so fun! Can I have Milk and Cookies with never have I ever? I’m so excited to see who it is lol!!!!

Love your writing style!!!

ANIMAL SHELTER DATE (FT. USHIJIMA WAKATOSHI)

milk and cookies → ushijima wakatoshi

never have i ever → animal shelter date

synopsis: you take your large, stoic boyfriend to the animal shelter to look at cute animals. pre-established relationship. fluff

word count: 776

“‘toshi, come look!”

you practically drag your boyfriend to a cage where a tortoiseshell cat sleeps. “how cute!”

ushijima tilts his head, studying the animal. an animal shelter wasn’t what he was expecting when you had asked him to hang out today. when he realized where you were taking him. . .

well. he went along because he wasn’t about to say no to you. you had seemed so excited at the idea of going to an animal shelter--he knows you adore animals. and maybe it’s just that: going to see cute animals.

but ushijima can’t help but feel sorry for them. they don’t fit in anywhere; they live at the shelter, sure, but shelter life isn’t suitable for any living creature. people come and stare at them, coo at them, take pictures. much like some of his own fans. ushijima pictures himself as a rabbit, stuck in a cage all day long with nothing to do but sleep and chew on carrots. he looks through the bars of his cage, and he sees his fans holding up signs with his name and face on it, sticking their fingers through the bars to try to pet him.

he contemplates setting all the rabbits free, but then decides that would be inappropriate.

you had booked an hour at the shelter; all the animals are for you to meet and play with. the worker will be in the room next door in case you need her; she gives you each a bag of treats and explains which ones are for which animals. you listen extremely attentively; ushijima tries to pay the same amount of attention as you, but his mind keeps drifting to long ears and carrot sticks.

eventually the worker leaves you two alone. you sit in the center of the room, and immediately a sphynx cat goes over to you, sniffs your fingers, and plops himself into your lap. you laugh, the sound like tinkling bells, and gently stroke the top of the cat’s head.

ushijima is still awkwardly standing. he looks around at all the animals, and his gaze lands on a german shepherd. this is his type of dog--big, strong, and silent. while the other animals are playing, tripping over each other and scrabbling to get the treats you throw to them, the german shepherd is calmly sitting off to the side, ears perked up as if on the lookout for danger. he tentatively reaches out a hand to the dog; within a couple of minutes he is absent-mindedly stroking the large canine as it lays by his side.

for most of the hour, the two of you stay in comfortable silence. your relationship is often filled with long periods where no one talks; ushijima obviously isn’t a big talker, and while you’re a bit more outgoing, there’s no need to fill every second of every day with words. sometimes you do something together that keeps you both busy--this is one of those times--but other times you just sit next to each other, each doing your own thing quietly. and both is fine. ushijima likes it that way. you do too, some peace and quiet in an otherwise chaotic life.

“are you going to meet any animals aside from that dog?” you tease him. ushijima frowns, studying his options.

“i like him,” he says finally. you chuckle to yourself, trying to imagine your boyfriend cuddling a persian cat.

“i’ve been wanting to do a fundraising project with this shelter for a while,” you admit. “with some good marketing, we could host events to raise money. more money means better conditions for all the animals. maybe some would even be able to get adopted. it’s super exciting.” your eyes shine hopefully.

ushijima looks at the german shepherd sitting next to him. “that would be good,” he decides. “permanent homes.”

“yeah,” you agree. “somewhere for them to stay forever. somewhere they belong. now come, look how cute this bunny is!”

you deposit a rabbit on his head. he blinks hard, and his eyebrows crease as he feels its claws digging into his hair. it’s mildly uncomfortable, but he doesn’t care much. the sunlight is shining on your face. you look so happy, so hopeful. you’re an angel. and where angels go, sad places become hopeful.

ushijima realizes that animal shelters are sad places, where homeless animals stay. but they are also hopeful places, where homeless animals heal and get a second chance at life. besides, the rabbits all look pretty happy, and his german shepherd certainly isn’t having a bad time here.

as your laughter rings through the room, ushijima realizes that maybe animal shelters aren’t so bad.

A/N: hi! you were actually one of the first blogs i followed and i'm so excited to be moots! i hope you liked your blind pick 🫶

[burningcheese-merchant]

I NEED MORE BURNED CHEESE CONTENT, could you please feed this poor hungry soul some burning cheese kids? Imagine the SUPER protective burn during Golden's pregnancy, or, or helping her with the children's dough (and already planning the next children)

The kids will be here soon, I promise :( they're at school right now, Spice and Golden have to go pick them up. It won't be too long. (I have something important to do irl and that takes priority. I'm hoping I have time at the end of this week to sit down and try to draw them. Everything else is ready, their characters sheets are done, got their whole lives on lock lol. All that's missing is to put them on paper. I only have about half a gram of artistic talent so I'll really be pushing myself here... but I want you all to see them really badly, so I'm happy to do it haha)

I don't have to imagine anything, I'm already there with you, buddy :') I hc them as already married by the time the kids come along, and yeah... Spice is SUPER overprotective lol. Very, very gentle and doting, but fiercely protective and downright hostile towards literally everyone else as a consequence of that protectiveness. He won't leave her side unless absolutely necessary, and he'll be snapping at whoever forced him to leave her and then rushing back to her as soon as he can. (She feels kind of claustrophobic at times, because he literally becomes her shadow during those 9 months lol.) But really, he's at her beck and call from beginning to end. She's craving something? He gets it for her. She's sore? Hugs and massages and nice baths. She's tired? He carries her to bed and doesn't allow anyone to bother her for any reason for the whole rest of the day. She can't sleep? He's up with her all night, talking to her and soothing her and doing whatever he can to lull her back to sleep because she needs all the rest she can get. He's Peak Husband during this time lol.

(He's just... beyond happy. I also hc this as being after Spice has redeemed himself and been accepted back into society, but still not having 100% let go of his dark past (which he never truly will, you can never fully forget something like that, unfortunately). So really, he takes this as one of the greatest rewards for his change of heart that he's ever gotten, and as a sign that he really has become better. The day Golden came to him and told him she was pregnant was the best day of his whole, entire life. He fell to his knees and cried when she told him. Not only has he managed to forsake his destructive nature and instead create something, but he's engaged in the most profound act of creation there is: he helped create a life. And he created this precious life with the woman he loves, who helped kickstart his journey to redemption in the first place. It just shows how far he's come, you know? From a cruel tyrant to a beloved king to two peoples... from a bloodthirsty psychopath destined to live and die alone to a much more even-tempered man who has atoned for his sins and learned to be a good friend and person again, as well as became a beloved husband and father... still a force for destruction, but now in a positive way, not a negative one. It's been a very long road, but it really feels like he reached the end, and this victory is sweeter than any he's had before.)

...And same thing if they're cookies, honestly lol. Peak Husband. Burning Sweetheart Cookie here, jumping for joy when Golden tells him she wants a child. He goes hunting for a Witch Oven of his own accord, going to quite literally every corner of the earth until he finds one, then they go to it and he's just like a kid on Christmas Day lol. They're making the batter together and he's just grinning that big, pointy grin he's got, beaming like the sun. How much of his dough should they mix in? How much of hers? What will happen, what sort of child will they create? Golden thinks he's so cute lol. He won't even sit still while the kid is baking in the oven; if he's not pacing back and forth in anticipation, he's picking Golden up and swinging her around and smothering her with kisses, and going on and on and on about how great the kid will be and how they'll be a fine warrior just like him and Golden. He's yanking the oven door open as soon as that timer goes off and they both hear crying... she has to tell him to slow down so they can both take the baby out together (he was so excited that he was just going to do it by himself lol)

TL;DR: The woobification of Burning Spice Cookie on this blog is complete, he is now Burning Sweetheart Cookie, reformed villain who loves his bird wife and their babies with all of his spicy heart

And to feed you a bit of extra content (and to keep everyone on the edge of their seats), I shall feed you a bit of information about the kiddies:

There are two of them, a son and a daughter. The son is the older one by a few years

I did research and took inspiration from both Egyptian and Hindu mythology for their design and some of their personality traits (I will explain this in detail soon. I actually really enjoyed learning about these religions, even if for a ridiculous reason, and I look forward to rambling about all the little bits and pieces of myths I cobbled together to make these two lol)

Each one resembles a parent quite a bit (but I will not specify which child looks like which parent yet)

One of them has wings like Golden Cheese does

Something really bad happens to the son in the future

Here are their soulstone descriptions, because yes, I really did go above and beyond creating these little guys lol

"This stone holds a piece of [REDACTED]'s soul. It feels warm and light, like a rare, refreshing breeze on a desert morning... But is that a single grain of self-doubt, nestled deep within its core?"

"This stone holds a piece of [REDACTED]'s soul. Though it burns very hot and bright, and feels difficult to handle at first, the kindness and unyielding strength resonating from within are nevertheless unmistakable."

[rebo-chan]

IMPORTANT CHARACTER ANALYSIS UNDER THE CUT. DO NOT IGNORE, YOU DO NOT WANT TO MISS THIS.

OKAY SO WE ALL KNOW THAT TSUNA LIKES SALISBURY STEAK FROM THE DATABOOKS AND ANIME, AND WE KNOW THAT REBORN LIKES ESPRESSO.. BUT IS THAT THE TRUTH? Is that what these young lads consumed throughout the series? What do they like to eat? What do we BEAR WITNESS TO THEM SHOVING INTO THEIR MOUTHS? With this question in mind, I embarked on a quest with my good friend @ketchup-chup TO DOCUMENT WHAT TSUNA AND REBORN ACTUALLY EAT. Have you been deceived to believe that Reborn doesn't like sweets? If so, you're in for a FUCKING treat. Some things we discovered during this is that Tsuna just is SO bad with eating. HE EATS SO LITTLE. I WOULD GO CHAPTERS UPON CHAPTERS WITH HIM NOT EATING ANYTHING. All while REBORN SHOVED HIS FUCKING FACE WITH FOOD TO THE POINT WHERE WE HAD TO ADD IN RULES FOR HIM.

You see the frame on the left? You see the difference in plates between Tsuna and Reborn? This is the best way I can symbolize what this was like before we begin.

Okay, before I begin, here are some ground rules:

We only did the daily life MANGA chapters, chapter 1-61 because nobody has any real time to calculate the distance of Byakuran's ash to see if any landed in Tsuna's mouth. That being said, I am sure that if we did Reborn would continue to be a fucking menace. We did not include any anime scenes, because we just could not realistically watch the entire daily life anime. This also does not include any 'food' we see in openings like the strawberry jam toast from Boys and Girls, or the soda he is drinking in Dive to World. Same goes for endings.

Reborn ate so much that for @ketchup-chup's sanity, we included only the things that he was actually shoving in his mouth. So, the list you're about to see, there WAS more and we cut it for our sanity's sake. Tsuna was eating so LITTLE, we did the exact opposite where everytime a food was even SPOTTED NEAR HIM, I snatched up into my list.

The foods will be listed in order as they were spotted in the series as we went through, but as sometimes they are doubled up on later. (As in a character for example had coffee once, then coffee again in a later chapter will be written as Coffee x2)

That's all! So, let's get started!

Sawada Tsunayoshi: Pocky Milk Italian Pasta Water x8 Chips x2 Lollipop x2 Poison Cooking x3 Rice balls x2 (the second time he had this, he fucking spit it out..) Soda x5 (his third soda was in one of harus pictures at the end of the chapter<3) Soumen noodles Sushi x2 (Two separate pieces of Sushi within two frames of each other that looked different lol...) Rice x3 (Rice in a bowl!) One bite of cake (This agitated me because there was a separate frame of Reborn with his own cake, that looked demolished in comparison to Tsunas measly one bite... OTL) Ramen Coffee x2 Instant Ramen 2 WATERMELON RINDS (IN THE SAME SCENE!! HE ATE TWO!!) Juice It should be said before I move onto Reborn, that the "ramen" entry was this:

That's 61 chapters worth of Tsuna's food. :) As you can see he really likes water. Water and one bite of cake :)<3

Reborn:

Fish Coffee x7 Italian Pasta Tea x3 (Second entry of this was him having his own tea ceremony of this) Watermelon x2 Cold Soba noodles Popsicle x7 Hot pot Kimchi Soumen Juice x2 Beer Sushi x2 Tuna Water x3 Cake x2 (First was the one he devoured that I mentioned further above, second was his wedding cake with Bianchi) Rice Mochi (For the mochi making competition, he was taste testing) Soup (Probably miso judging by it, but he sure was slurping it) Cookie Barbeque Soda

An honorable mention that the lovely ketchup didn't include because he didn't actually eat it, but I spotted in digging through chapters of Tsuna starving himself: a smoothie/milkshake(?) and a icecream sundae. Here you can look at it yourself~

Also, yes the popsicle was included in the count of FUCKING popsicles he's CONSUMED.

To do a recap:

Tsuna ate 39 things by the start of kokuyo, subtracting the RAMEN gokudera dropped on him and the spit out rice ball and i wish i coULD HALF HIS FUCKING ONE BITE CAKE THATS NOT REAL FOOD TSUNA. Tsuna really consumed 36.5 items (37 if you count the one bite of cake but whatever..) Also, if you subtract the poison cooking, he's sitting at 33.5 (34 *grumbles*).

Reborn ate 39 items, including the honorable mention he had 41 items. Bearing in mind, we cut out so much of Reborn just showing up near food or holding onto it. Tsuna, meanwhile was counted for existing near food. Gathering nutrients through photo-fucking-synthesis. The anime feeds Tsuna SO much more, I can name 5 items off the top of my memory that he ate in daily life that just aren't counted from the manga. Please don't be fooled by the fact they start out with the same number till we started subtracting, MOST OF TSUNAS IS HIS WATER COUNT. If you IGNORE ALL THE DRINKS HE HAS, MANS IS SITTING AT 17, WHILE IF YOU REMOVE REBORNS DRINKS HE GOES DOWN TO 25. (Its mostly his love for espresso bringing down his number, MEANWHILE FOR TSUNA ITS HIS FUCKING WATER COUNT??)

Now that our statistical analysis that NO one told us to do has been completed. What can we learn from it about our characters favorite food preferences? Well, Tsuna is SO well hydrated. We love a water-stanning king. Besides that, he's mostly eating snacks with his lollipops, chips, and his enjoyment of drinking soda. (He drinks fast food soda the most, with 3 of those submissions being him sipping from a container with a straw. The last two are from a can and a bottle specifically.) Meanwhile, we can believe Reborn when he says he likes coffee, but ALSO he fucking?? loves?? popiscles?? it's unreal??? there were so many popsicles??? He LOVES SWEETS.. sad to say but he just fucking lied to Luce in the fillers about not liking sweets. It's Tsuna, if anyone, that doesn't like sweets with his one bite of cake. HOLD ON ACTUALLY FUCK THIS IM SHOWING YOU GUYS THE CAKE DILEMMA ME AND KETCHCUP WERE STARING AT.

YOU SEE THAT LITTLE CAKE THATS BEING CUT OUT OF FRAME? THATS IT. THATS THE EXTENT OT TSUNAS BITE. MEANWHILE, HERES REBORNS.

THAT THING IS ALMOST GONE. YALL ARE SEEING THIS RIGHT??

REKSHNS anyway! Reborn's more of a curious soul with his food, trying a bunch of stuff that he wouldn't normally eat. Meanwhile Tsuna plays it mostly safe with snacks and mostly Japanese food. AGAIN, no one asked us to do this and while we are absolutely hysterical as I type this up, if you have any questions about specifics please feel free to ask SDKJGN this is IMPORANT!! CHARACTER ANALYSIS!!! CLEARLY!!!

Thanks for reading this far HELP ME. This was funny as hell to dig through and perhaps we may look through the last arcs if we feel like it, or do other characters. (I've noticed Gokudera is a good eater!)

See you next post~

[evenmorefatallyobsessed]

So other than 18 or is going to be in Krillin's harem?

I think I got a nice harem planned out for him Lol. Would love to hear thoughts on it. Of course at the top of said list is 18 (Lapis Lazuli)

AKA Best Girl of DBZ and the one who is really the mastermind behind this happening.

I thought about it and why not go with Age-Gap, Marron has her school friends regularly visit and hang out. Anna Nishikinomiya (Shimoneta) and Marron are classmates regularly study together at Marron's house.

Oh so sexually suppressed Anna has been exposed to the pluky Z-Fighter far too much and seeing Krillin shirtless… A lot, and when he's not shirtless he's small and cute! Logically he can't be cute, sexy, buff and mature and yet he is.

And yes, she gives Krillin the cookies… And Krillin recognizes the taste, but can't quite pin it down Until later that night with 18

Krillin:!!!

18: What's wrong, you never stop eating till I cum?

Krillin:… Anna knows my favorite flavor!

18: What?

Next is Nobara, who looks a lot like 18 and has a similar if not more aggressive and standoffish personality. Krillin can't help but approve of her being friends with his daughter. While Nobara admires 18 and the later see's a lot of herself in the younger girl.

I see Krillin appealing to Nobara the same way he did to 18, his kinder nature, but also obvious attraction to her. Though in Nobara's case he makes it clear with the "If I were single and thought I had a chance" joke… But well Nobara can't help but stare at the muscles that no regular human could possible have and if a woman she so admires likes him, well there has to be a reason right.

And last would be Mai and Maki Zenin, the idea is simply Krillin gets along with the later easily enough, she's a friend and senpai of Nobara and his daughter. And she does spare with him on occasion, though he goes ridiculously easy on her. But one day he hears about what happening to her from her daughter Marron, about how her family is trying to kill her. He rushes to her aid only to find her having murdered her abusive family and her sister Mai dead. Krillin deciding that the Zenin are about as human as the Sayains (Raditz & Nappa) were (Look human but are evil) proceeds to go off seemingly abandoning them, when in reality he gathers the dragon balls (Pleading with Bulma for the radar) and revives her

Haven't thought too deeply about Erasa yet, but hey, she Videl's friend, she have to had many chances to talk to Krillin at this point.

[brittle-doughie]

can i pretty please have some xylitol nova cookie crumbs :::::''''(((

Have to set up for Black Hole Cookie somehow lol, if they ever will be a thing…

This was it. The black hole had finally come to take everything you held dear. You couldn’t help but stare at the destruction it was doing, seeing what you and your fellow Xylitol cookies had built…just be gone like that…

You had just finished evacuating the last of your cookies to the ship, nobody else should be in danger…except for you.

Again, the sight of the black hole doing its work was catastrophic but…mesmerizing at the same time…you took a step closer to get a better look at it…

“Xylitol Y/N Cookie!”

You were suddenly picked up and flown towards the ship in your planet leader Xylitol Nova Cookie’s grip.

Your home…

“There’s no time right now, what matters is getting you to safety!”

“I promised to leave no one behind. That goes double for you.”

Xylitol Nova Cookie….

“Now hold on tight. Please…don’t let me go…”

You clutched onto him, tears threatening to leave your closed eyes.

You may have had to let your planet go…but you weren’t strong enough to do the same for him…