#sam and max headcanons

[theshifterofrealms]

You know what? Fuck it! SAM AND MAX HEADCANONS!!!

1: Fuck you, they're married.

2: Max is capable of being a good person, he just constantly chooses not to be out of spite.

3: Max is a war criminal. The only reason he hasn't gotten arrested is because the one time he did the world nearly ended and Sam killed like, 10 people.

4: Pretty sure this is actually Canon but Max is a masochist and he is NOT ashamed to admit it in public.

5: Sam is a bottom. I refuse to believe he isn't.

6: Max sold his soul. Nobody knows why or what he sold it for. No, not even Sam. It is one of the world's greatest mysteries.

7: They watch Monty Python together and know the script of Holy Grail by heart.

[sootnuki]

happy pride from the freelance police 🌈❤️

[youraveragebtsstan]

If Supernatural was an HBO ORIGINAL, we'd all be done for.

Ever since seeing a post on here about Supernatural but making it HBO style, I've been thinking about what it could have been like... And the conclusion I've come to is UNREAL.

Firstly, picture the Gothic Horror Themes of Seasons 1 & 2 but with all the nudity/gore of True Blood... Pure Chef's Fucking Kiss. 🤌🏾🤌🏾 Dean would've 100% cursed like a sailor not to mention live his best fuck boy life in full effect. And Stanford Sam would have whored around that campus like no tomorrow. Especially with that slim ass waist line and those low ridding jeans- girl please.

Secondly, I feel like Wincest would have DEFINITELY been canon. Like not just on an emotional/codependent level but like FULL ON sex scenes and secret 'no-no, we can't tell anyone because they won't understand us' precanon moments. (I mean, just imagine the wild and bratty, 'I hate you/love you/missed you' sex they would have had after arguing on that bridge in Jericho S1E1.) Ughhh, that would have gagged me out the gate bitch.

And lastly, I feel like peer pressure would have made Kripke cast Sam as a girl (or at least consider it.) And this isn't me saying I don't have faith in our boy to stick true to his art, I just feel like for that time in society a lot of the big wigs would have gave him a hard time getting the green light if they knew 2 brothers would be sucking and fucking on screen vs a brother doing the same with his younger sister. (Of course that says a lot about the society we live in, but I digress.)

What are some things, you think would have been prevalent in Supernatural if it were an HBO Original? I'm interested to know. Comment down below, or reblog with your input. 👋🏾🖤 Byeeeee.

P.S: Yes, I went back and made a couple of edits because I forgot to say some stuff. Oops.

[queenlakiefer]

When Paul gets high Part 2

No one:

Absolutely no one:

Not a single soul on this Earth:

Paul: Guys, boob size doesn��t matter. Big or small, I want them all!

David: That’s great Paul but what has that got to do with ordering takeout? 🥡

[azirowley]

God gave me the hobby of putting timelines and family trees together and this is what I use it for

[ringobingos]

oswald x 31 minutos but it's actually a shameless headcanon post that he is bodoque's (and max's) cousin

[brat-pack-it-up]

☆|| Day one of my lost boys head-canons ||☆

(Fair warning they’re random & not in order)

The frogs

• Okay for starters their parents names are Rainbow and Clive

• Rainbow was raised by hippies while Clive wasn’t raised with the lifestyle but got into it in college

• They also met in college in an english literature class

•They both dropped out at around 19 when rainbow got pregnant

•Clive was deployed in the Vietnam war until he was honorably discharged after a year

• They only really started doing drugs after he was discharged

• Rainbow has narcolepsy (part of the reason they’re sleeping in every scene)

• When rainbow isn’t high she likes to paint and bake

• Alan is 9 months older than Edgar

• Neither of them have middle names

• Edgar and Alan’s military obsession came from their dads old war story’s

• The dog tags Alan wears are their dads

• Both Edgar and Alan are horrible at customer service to the point that it’s shocking that they actually have money to eat

• The boys were homeschooled until their first year of middle school

• Until the summer before their first year of school they both had long hair, Alan’s going to his upper back and Edgar’s going to his shoulders

• they cut it in the bathroom with their dads old switch army knife

* Edgar purposely deepens his voice to sound more intimidating and only using his real voice when he gets scared, really tired, or distracted

• Together the two of them can only make 4 meals so they do rotation since their parents aren’t exactly their to feed them

• Edgar’s the “talker” between the two of them but he usually comes off more off putting

• Alan has the most delayed reflexes known to men

• The only tv shows the two watched growing up are things from the 50s-60s “blood sucking Brady bunch” “the attack of Eddie Munster”

• Edgar is obbsessed with Rambo and chuck Norris to the point it’s concerning

• Alan is the worst driver know to man when he learns

• They both flex in any reflective mirror they pass by

• They definitely share a room

• Edgar has the bed farthest from the door in case anyone breaks in

• Pinky promises are their form of sacred law

• They have their bedtime that they set up for themselves

Your honor I love them

[belletroxa]

WHAT THE HELL?????? ARTISTS CAN DRAW WHATEVER THEY WANT????? THAT'S CRAZY!!!!!! *insert intense brainrotting over hyperfyxations*

anyways, to the 5 people who are both in the Ace Attorney and Sam and Max fandoms simultaneously: COME GET YOUR CRUMBS!!!!! 🐶🐰👔⚖️

MAYA AND MAX, MY FAVORITE WANTED CRIMINALS!!! 🥹☝️💜🤍

i want them dead /affectionately

[moomley]

they're watching aliens btw

[giddlygoat]

soda popper posting ………

[klugpuuo]

they shouldve (illegally) been at the club

[juneyybee]

Hired

A Sam and Max head cannon where as young adults/older teens they tried out a LOT of jobs-

I can imagine them going through several job's often- one after the other

Non Text Version

Sam and Max are own by Steve Purcell and SkunkApe

[bachelorisland]

the canons in my head

[dogboyklug]

shoutout to telltale and purcell for accidentally giving me so many crumbs yay

disabled and ableist gay and homophobic cops heart emoji ..

[azirowley]

Based on Sam mentioning he has a Japanese neck tie collection, paired with him being a computer nerd in the mid-late 80s, glued to the fact he loves noir media and clearly has an interest in detective fiction, I can only come to the conclusion that he's watched anime at least once and enjoyed it. Startling!

[everyonesonthespectrum]

Today’s Autistic character of the day is:

Sam from Sam & Max