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sturniolotrip-samandcolby-lover · 8 months ago

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Matt sturniolo -little bean

Warnings -swearing,mention of abortion, mention of sex , vomiting use of y/n, arguing .Small age gap (matt 20 and reader 22) silent treatment

Angst/fluff Matt

Author note -thinking of making this into a series so let me know what you all think

Part 1

Word count-2k

I brush the hair out of my face ,as I wake up to a empty house.The house was full of silence as my boyfriend Matt and his triplets brother had left the house already for some business meetings taking place at the ware house.I look at the clock on my phone 10:47am shit thats late for me and im still shattered i dont even feel like ive slept at all. Im awoken from my sleepy daze by my stomach rumbled ,I get up brush my hair quickly and head to the kitchen to get something to eat .

I raid the fridge and cupboards in search for something to eat , I decide to have chopped up lettuce,pickled gherkins and some jolly ranchers .I finish my breakfast and head to the couch to watch some TV ,as I sit down I see a note that's been left on the coffee table it said 'hey baby me Chris and nick have got a few more meetings today then what we thought might be abit later home will bring back some late lunch with us .Matt xxxx'. A smile is present on my face the whole time I read his quick note with my cheeks blushed , Matt's smallest actions can still have a massive effect on me even after being together for over a year now .

I flick through the channels as nothing can satisfy me , I decided to open the YouTube app and put some Sam and Colby on specifically the conjuring from last year's hell week .I'm half way through the video when all of a sudden I feel so nauseous I can feel it building in my stomach like a tornado swirling around inside of me , it starts of slow and the next thing I know I'm running to the nearest bathroom thankfully it's matt and i shared one .I throw the toilet seats up and fall to my knees and close my eyes as the first bit of vomit comes rushing up my throat and out of my mouth .I sit there for the next hour bringing up whats left of this mornings breakfast and last nights dinner.

After minutes of waiting for the sickness to come back .I decided to stand up and reach for my toothbrush and paste ,as I brush my teeth I start to think of anything that could of gave me a bug or if there was a stomach bug going around .After minutes I've came to know conclusion of my sickness when it hits me .....shit Matt and I are usually careful if we don't use a condom we pull out or we get the morning after pill but a while ago I joined the triplets on their 6 million subscribers video .During the night having all the huts to ourselves Matt and I decided to get the hut as far from nick and Chris as possible .It safe to say there was some very animalistic behaviour going on in our tent that night , in the heat of the moment no condom or pull out was used and I could exactly get plan b pill from the gift shop so we just left it and thought well it's not going to happen .

I decide that before I start to get myself worked up in a panic , I'll go to the shop and do a test before the boys get back .Once I feel like I won't be sick again I go and throw some leggings and a jumper on leaving my top to go bra-less as I'm reminded of some achiness in them .I throw some crocs on and grab my car keys as i head out .

*Arrives back from shop*

I walk back into the house and I'm thankful that it's still silent meaning I'm the only one here .This is my first ever pregnancy scare so I'm not expert , I end up buying 7 different tests and some mints to settle my stomach and yet some more gherkins.I wonder around the kitchen with my hands full of tests in search of a cup or container as i dont feel like peeing 6 different times .I decided to keep one unused so i can do it again with matt incase he doesn't believe me .After finding a disposable cup I drink 3 cups of water and walk around the house doing some cleaning while I wait for the water to hit my bladder .I feel a urge to pee and walk to the bathroom, I position the disposable cup where it's supposed to be and let me bladder do it's job I open all the tests and when I'm finished place the 6 sticks into the cup .I start pacing the bathroom but decided that wouldn't be the best thing to do in this situation .So I make my way to the kitchen and put a kettle on figuring that a hot drink may help my nerves while killing the time awaiting the tests.I walk back to the bathroom once then minutes are up and as I pull all the tests out I stand in shock as they all say the same ....I'm pregnant.

Fuck fuck fuck is the only word that is running in my head , what am I going to do ,what am I going to say , what's Matt going to say his career is at its prime right now what will a baby do with this .Fuck their triplets , twins run on my side of the family what if there's more then one baby in there .I hold onto one of the tests in my shaky hands as I pace the bathroom.After minutes of walking around the small white tiled room I decided to hide all the tests and put them in a draw in Matt and my bedroom and I decide to text matt.

Y/n: hey babe was just wondering do you know how long you're gonna be xx

My phone pings instantly telling me that most likely it woul be Matt had texted me back

Matt:yeah not long just grabbing some maccies won't be long everything okay at home ? Xx

Y/n: yeah just got something to talk to you about xx

I avoid my phone until he gets back .I'm startled as I hear the door fling open and just one set of foot steps ."y/n?" I hear his familiar voice Matt is calling after me ."in the living room" I shout back to him .Seconds later he appears looking as perfect as usual "where's Chris and nick?" I ask him "they was fucking around when we was supposed to be signing cards for merch getting sent out so they went back to the warehouse to do their signing , Laura is gonna drop them off later tho .What's this thing you wanna talk about?" I pause with words moving rapidly around my head trying to think of the right way to tell him that I'm now pregnant with his child .I decide that no words are the right words so I take him by the hand and lead him to the bathroom.

His body stills while his eyes move over what the tests all say .The room is silent , too silent."Matt says something " I say breaking the silence ."when did it happen" he says still not taking his eyes off the tests "at the safari , in the hut that night" I respond back to him "fuck" he mutters to himself as he storms out the door .I stand there in silence as my eyes well up with tears.I hear the jingle of Matt's car keys and the door slamming telling me that Matt had left again and gone in his car .I walk into the living room now numb with emotions my hand rests on my lower stomach now knowing that through the layers of skin and muscle is our baby ,my baby the size smaller then a bean in this moment I know that I've got to keep this baby wether Matt wants it or not .

Minutes pass and my nauseous feeling comes over me again as I run to the bathroom again.I spend all the best part of an hour again with my head in the toilet when I stand up again feeling weak at my knees I brush my teeth for the 3rd time today trying to get rid of the vile aftertaste left in my throat .I hear the door go again but i hear 3 set of footsteps this time ,and voices nick ,Chris and matts voice ."what are you gonna do bro?" I hear Chris ask Matt "I don't know"he responds "well you and y/n have gotta talk this out Matt you can't just leave her in the bathroom like you did last time " I hear nick snap at the boys .

"Y/n" I hear nick call out me ."I'm on the bathroom just about to come out" I shout back as I walk into the kitchen .Matt's angry stare softens as he seen my face , I'm now pale and clammy with my skin layered in a thin amount of sweat ."congratulations" Chris says breaking the tension in the room "thank you" I say with a half smile ."so I think you two have gotta talk about this" nick states ."I'm not getting rid of it" I say quickly that being the only thing I'm sure of right now ."I wasn't even going to suggest that" Matt says with anger in his voice .Nick ,places his hand up to Matt in a urge to shush him "calm Matt" he says to him."is it mine ?"matt asks me looking me in the eye "are you fucking kidding me" i say in the exact tone that matt has.Nick and chris take this as a hint and both excuse themselves to different rooms "yeah I'm being real" he says raising his voice , it being full with anger ."you're the only person I've slept with matt you know that" i say to him storming off into our shared room .

*Few hours later*

I hear a knock at the bedroom door hoping that it's Matt ."come in" I shout sounding optimistic.The door opens and nick strides in with a sorry smile on his face "so that was intense" he says as he sits down next to me on the bed "yeah" i agree with him ."so i dont know if this is the right thing to say but im really glad your'e keeping the baby" he says nudging my arm ."yeah i am too , i just hope that matt feels the same " i say smiling properly for the first time today ."alright its getting late so I'll leave you to sleep i heard creating a baby can be tiring "he says with a small laugh.

Just as nick leaves the room Matt enters it , he ignores me acting as if I'm not in the room as he goes to the wardrobe grabbing some spare pillows and duvet he walks back out of the room as I sit in bed listening to him getting comfortable on the sofa .I think to myself how much of a long night I'm in for I can never sleep properly when I'm not with Matt and even worse knowing that he's mad at me .As the thoughts come to my head added with the extra hormones that pregnancy has brought on my eyes start to fill with tears when they fall down my face .I have so many questions running over my head thinking how I'm going to bring up a baby by myself although nicks previous words bring some form of comfort to me .As the clock strike 4 am and im still wide awake and emotional i decide to head to the bathroom and take a calming bath .Im thankful that both nick and chris's rooms are on different levels as I run the tab the sound of water echos through the room .I rid of my clothes and get into the bath now full of bubbles I close my eyes in attempt to relax.

Suddenly my nauseousness creeps up on me again , who ever called morning sickness 'morning' has never experienced this cus it seems to be all throughout the day already .I jump up from the bath with my wet hair sticking to my body as I move quickly to the toilet I throw the lid up and sit on the floor as bile begins to leave my body .I startled as a soft towel is wrapped around my body ,I look up to see Matt crouching next to me with his eyes full of tears himself .His hand rubs circles on my back as I start gagging again ."let it out baby it's okay" he whispers I release bile 3 more times as I pull back and rest my head on Matt's shoulder as he pushes my hair out of my face ."come on let's go to bed and talk " he says so quietly careful not to wake his two brothers up .He stands up and picks me up bridal style still with the towel wrapped around me .He carries me to our bed and uses his foot to close the door as he places me gently on the bed .He goes to our wardrobe and fetches me some shorts and one of his tops , he helps me get dressed as my body is weak from the vomiting.Once I'm dressed I lay in bed as Matt walks over to the other side of the bed and jumps in to bed with me .I sit waiting for him to speak "y/n im sorry for what i said and done earlier i know that you would never cheat on me and id never ask you to get rid of it .Whatever you choose ill support you .Im sorry ive treated you like that when you needed me the most ..." I cut his speech off with a kiss "I know , I know babe and we're going to be fine I want to keep this baby tho" I say to him looking him in his eyes "we're going to be a mommy and daddy" he says to me smiling ."we best tell our parents" I say to him before falling asleep in his arms .

#chris sturniolo #nick sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #fanfiction #like #chris sturniolo imagine #matt sturniolo fanfic #mattsturniolo #sturniolo #sturniolo smut #baby #stories #series #part 1 #parts #comment #folow4folow

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ultraflavour · 1 year ago

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If Daggerheart becomes the game that powers Critical Role instead of D&D 5e, you’re going to see a shift almost overnight. How many tables are out there of people who play D&D strictly because it’s the Critical Role game? I guarantee you the number is not zero.

Keep in mind what Critical Role did for 5th Edition: It not only served to promote 5e, it also taught 5e, and the importance of that second part can’t be overstated. To a newcomer, D&D is bigger and scarier to get into than, say, any arbitrary video game. There’s rulebooks to read, dice to buy, you have to find a table of people who aren’t absolute psychos to play with…

Critical Role took one of those impediments out of the equation, by teaching their viewers the 5e ruleset through play. After hours and hours and hours of listening to charismatic voice actors playing, you can start to get a comfort and a familiarity with the rules that you wouldn’t necessarily get otherwise. Critical Role teaches the rules and tropes of D&D to its audience.

Now suppose instead of teaching the audience how to Roll with Advantage, you’re teaching them how Success with Fear/Failure with Hope works. Instead of hearing about Paladins and Barbarians, now you’re talking about Seraphs and Guardians.

It might have made sense for them at one point to weld themselves to the D&D brand, but I think we’ve seen some pretty good evidence that it might not be the best play in the long run. If Critical Role is really getting into the publishing business by way of Darrington Press, then it is absolutely in their best interest to start using their own ruleset.

And it seems like Daggerheart is being built with Actual Play in mind. The fact that it’s being built for Theatre of the Mind style play with a “Yes-and” success/failure mechanic tells me that they want this to be a more narrative-forward “Swashbuckling” game than a “Kick in the door and kill goblins” game. Players are going to have interesting choices either way.

Daggerheart has the chance to fulfill the promise of Dungeon World: To be “recognizably D&D,” but to prioritize the narrative aspects of the game without throwing out the satisfying character customization and progression that D&D is known for. That last bit is where Dungeon World stumbled, in my opinion, but there’s definitely a big opportunity to improve on that style of game.

Critical Role shouldn’t be afraid of D&D because ultimately, their responsibility is to their fans and themselves. They have no obligation to continue to teach and promote 5th Edition. They have millions of subscribers on Youtube, Twitch, the various socials. If they start talking up their own thing, it creates a conversation that has been sorely needed for a long time: “What if D&D isn’t the best game for our table?”

Furthermore, they have a ready-made audience for their game. Critical Role fans are tabletop fans by definition. They’re here to watch a tabletop RPG featuring strong world-building, well-realized characters, and escalating tension and drama. It’s high time that they had a ruleset that prioritized those things, rather than fostering arguments about how the grappling rules work.

I say this not as a Critical Role fan, but as someone who just wishes that the conversation around D&D and tabletop in general was a bit more nuanced. Players should be able to ask for what they want, and not get shouted down because what they want isn’t D&D. Not only does it lead to better game design, it leads to more people at the table actually getting what they want, rather than settling for the “Safe” thing again.

#daggerheart #dnd5e #critical role #darrington press

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the-arson-author-gamer · 1 year ago

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How Likely Each Stardew Valley Villager Would Give Me Drugs If I Asked For It

(and other related matters)

Ok, before I begin, this wasn't an original idea, I got inspired, and unlike some people (ssstalkerwolf) I like to give credit. So here it is!

youtube

Either way, after watching a video by the stardew youtuber, Nino Kito (go subscribe) and reading the article that he read (which is hilarious by the way), I essentially went 'could I do this in my own way?'

And I did.

I find it worth it to at least read the article before you read this because there are some references and I think one should go back to the original source if they can.

Also, this was for fun, and my own amusement watching my friends slowly lose their perception of who I am as a person.

As you can already tell, this is going to be long, so everything will be under the cut for the remaining sanity of you and myself after I post it.

#45: Jas

First, a literal child. Second, she knows what drugs are, and it would traumatize her for life if you asked because she absolutely knows what drugs do to Marnie after her 3-day work week and Shane after another depressing night at the saloon. That kid can’t witness another addiction come into place, her childlike whimsy is depleting at a rapid pace.

#44: Vincent

90% sure that this kid doesn’t even understand the concept of war, let alone what weed is and why mom keeps getting upset when dad doesn’t act paranoid for once in his very sad life. There’s no sense asking him if he doesn’t even know what it is, which is why he places above Jas, who knows what drugs are. If the kid ever learned how to read within the several years you’ve been in the valley, he might learn what it is, but that chance is highly unlikely considering Penny’s report cards, so you’re safe for now. Or at least until he asks Jodi.

#43: Leo

Leo’s third because that’s also a kid, but also because Vincent could figure out what drugs are, Leo will never. Considering all the research done on the few surviving feral children (because society keeps fucking it up) it is even a wonder that Leo can still speak, let alone read. That kid will just squawk at you like a fucking parrot. Another waste of your precious time, but at least you aren’t potentially traumatizing any more children than you have to for your drug quest.

#42: Jodi

Christian stay-at-home housewife to a man of war? Jodi gives me homophobe vibes, let alone you asking for a bit of the good stuff. That woman is calling you the spawn of Satan and then tries to hit you with her purse. You get away easily because beating up monsters in the mines does wonders, but you aren’t seeing the likes of Vincent ever again, considering we all know how those people are. You can still see Sam, but that’s because her closeted bisexual son knows how to evade her and how to get easy drugs (Sebastian).

#41: Demetrius

Yeah, Demetrius could cook up meth like Walter White but the dude’s a wet blanket. Not only will he say no, but the guy is going to follow you around like a lost puppy asking if you are okay or need addiction therapy. If you make the mistake of asking him, that’s on you for thinking that the man that embodies 90s romance movie father of the girl next door will ever give you drugs.

#40: Morris

Yeah, the man is totally an asshole. He would ban you from ever being hired at Joja, but he technically can’t block you from entering or buying any Joja product without causing the third Joja scandal of the month (It’s the 12th of Summer). If pollution’s mascot bans you from their stores, not only are they losing their precious small town pennies, but also getting another parody article from The Onion that blows up on Twitter. Still not getting back into Joja though after you fuck up so bad on the farm there’s no point of return, but that’s probably for the better.

#39: Governor

That feathered fedora says all, the man has drugs, but there will be no allusion to it due to the fact that he requires those important republican/conservative Christian mom votes. You can ask him, but there’s no way you will ever get any from him. The only thing you are getting from him is the place where he gets those hats and a governmental secret that you’re forced to take to the grave. Congrats, your knowledge of the valley increased by 0.17%!

#38: Penny

Similar to the governor, Penny has drugs, but she isn’t giving them to you, or even telling you that she has them. That shitty toddler teaching job is the only thing preventing her and Pam from going out on the streets. If she gets her online bought teaching licence revoked, she’s done for. It’s best not to ask her for both of your remaining pieces of sanity.

#37: Marnie

She also has drugs, but her already thin supply of ketamine is running thinner by the continued amount of days that Shane has been in the valley. If you ask her, she’ll just say sorry and try to sell you another cow for more drug money and an apology toy for Jas for putting up her remaining family’s bullshit.

#36: Clint

This man is the biggest pussy in the town, you really think he can handle anything more than a single pint of beer, then you’re wrong. He would panic and then cry in the seclusion of the machinery of the blacksmith’s opening your 28 magma geodes if you ever asked him for drugs. I also think he would up the coal prices again if you asked, and nobody wants to dust sprite farm more than they have to. Or pay thousands into Clint’s Emily shrine in the closet for a few morsels of coal.

#35: Harvey

Another pussy, but instead of saying no, he just quakes in his dress shoes at the counter while he hands over you some of the hardest drugs ever prescribed to man. But you will never consider him as an option considering his status as the town’s top scaredy-cat and the only ones who will ever know this is Maru his only employee and Pam who was just bold enough to ask.

#34: Robin

Robin grew up in construction and carpentry, the concept of drugs does not scare Robin, therefore she isn’t going to freak out like everybody so far on the list. But she has none for you, because she is apparently some kind of good samaritan. It must be all those rants from Demetrius and the science behind hearing enough of a concept makes you believe it.

#33: Goblin Henchmen

The only drugs the henchman will give you is the delicacy of void mayo (if you can even gain any friendship with the fellow). So unless if the mayonnaise from magic void chickens does something interesting, it may not be worthwhile to you. The only reason he ranks higher is that I don’t know the hallucinogenic properties of void mayo (yet).

#32: Marlon

Yeah, the guy has drugs, but he won’t give them to you, considering that he knows you would absolutely take it into the mines and snort some cocaine while completing the wizard’s prismatic jelly quest (I don’t blame you, that quest is hell). He’s already lost too many members to drug use in the mines, it’s kind of embarrassing at this point. Though, if you have drugs on you and are out of the mines, he’ll totally join you as the first member (and only sane member) of the Nightmare Blunt Rotation Circle™.

#31: Pierre

Remember the secret stash cutscene? Pierre has drugs, but he isn’t letting go of those narcotics at all. Good luck trying to get out of there with your perception of that family intact. You will have no drugs, only another couple of secrets that you have to take to the grave. At least now you know why Abigail’s hair has remained purple after never dyeing it.

#30: Maru

While Maru does not have drugs, she is chill about them and will even occasionally join Sebastian once in a while. She will probably just direct you towards Sebastian, if anything. But considering the kind of game Stardew is, this is essentially a long side quest, but instead of getting a tool or another ridiculous single use item it’s just drugs… Wait.

#29: Gus

Despite the fact that Sebastian is dealing right under his nose (what do you really think he’s doing every Friday night? It obviously isn’t beating Sam at pool, he’s done that hundreds of times already, there’s no thrill to it anymore) Gus believes that his saloon is free of drugs. Which is a stupid assumption considering that he deals with both Pam and Shane on a regular basis for their alcohol. He’ll just say no and then watch you avidly for the next few times you visit on Friday to hand out an assortment of iridium rabbit feet as if it’s completely normal.

#28: George

Poor man is in possession of nothing more than some expired Tylenol in the back of the medicine shelf that he can’t reach. George should probably be on some serious opioids but considering that state of that wheelchair (which I’m pretty sure is growing mold) he probably has nothing for you. But if you offered him anything, you would gain more friendship than giving him an iridium leek on his 87th birthday.

#27: Grandpa

When Grandpa was alive, he had complete access to drugs (Working with Qi will do that to you). But it’s not like he’s alive enough to give them to you, unless if there’s some kind of astral plane/purgatory narcotic that he can hand out (which would be sick as fuck). But besides Grandpa’s lack of drugs, he totally hanged around Willy and Linus in ye olden days, creating the first edition of the Nightmare Blunt Rotation Circle™. You’ll get some great stories through the dream realm but no drugs.

#26: Gunther

I think Gunther would get bored at the museum, waiting around for your once-a-month visit with a bunch of ores or artifacts. Of course, he gets excited to have those, but he goes through inspecting them so quick that he’s done only a couple of days after your visit. So a bored archaeologist has to do something… drugs. He does drugs. It’s not like the poor lonely man has anything to offer you, but if you offered him something, he would be quite excited. The only way, the man has access to some magic mushrooms is following you to the mines and going down to floor 80 to pick up some stuff. At least he’s responsible enough not to go alone or do the magic mushrooms while in the caves, unlike the entirety of the now dead Adventurers Guild.

#25: Haley

Yeah, article’s right, Haley would not have drugs but would absolutely be able to lead you to them. This girl knows everybody, and the next party she’s going to? That you were only half paying attention to because she kept insulting your taste in fashion? Yeah, she knows a guy, who knows a guy, who’s friend’s sister’s step-brother is going to be there and has got a great stash that he’s willing to share.

#24: Sandy

Sandy’s shop lives right off of Qi, her business essentially relies on that man, 110% that she would return the favour to Qi by directing you to him. Sandy is a solid contact if you really need some good drugs.

#23: Bouncer

Akin to Sandy, the bouncer works for Qi, of course he has access to drugs, not like he’s going to hand them out willingly, though he will direct you to Qi for more business. He and Sandy got a solid deal with Qi if that they promote the drug business in the desert (to the trader) than they get more money in their pockets and some free stuff to themselves, are they going to deny a great deal? I think not.

#22: Dwarf

As we know, the Dwarf doesn’t have a basic concept of personal property, so any of the drugs he has are stolen from Linus’s stashes around the valley. So yes he will give you drugs, but you just don’t know who it’s from. If you are fine with risking getting caught with somebody else’s drugs that have been second-hand stolen, then go right ahead! Dwarf’s got you!

#21: Pam

I feel as this is self-explanatory, Pam has drugs, she gets them from Harvey, but she much rather join you for drinks than for drugs. She has them, but I think what’s left of Pam’s moral standing wouldn’t exactly feel 100% okay giving a 20-something year old hard drugs (not that she knows what Penny does when she isn’t around). You’d still have a great night, it just wouldn’t be drugs.

#20: Professor Snail

Article’s right again, that Snail man totally survived off of magic mushrooms inside that caves. If you ask him for drugs, he would just shakily point a finger towards the mushroom caves.

#19: Willy

I think Willy would be a complicated man, I don’t think he would do drugs, but I think he wouldn’t care if you did them, maybe he would oversee the Nightmare Blunt Rotation Circle™. At most would do a bong with you while night fishing, but he wouldn’t go apeshit like anybody else, so that’s a plus.

#18: Kent

“He was in the war!” Bitch so? If you offered that guy some relief from the constant trauma, he would pay off your mortgage. He doesn’t have any drugs on his person because Jodi’s like a personified drug dog but also a bitch. But he does have some stashes around the valley, not very good spots though, considering that Linus took all of them. I think it’s worth noting that when high, Kent will reveal every piece of traumatic information he has from the war, which makes him an integral member of the Nightmare Blunt Rotation Circle™. Because no circle can go without a traumatized adult man!

#17: Granny Evelyn

Granny was the coolest kid in town back in ye olden days, she had anything and everything. Too bad she gave up on it after she married George and took in Alex. Despite all of that, she does have some likely-dead contacts for you if you are interested in whatever the hell Granny was into back in the days.

#16: Sam

Sam is besties with both Sebastian and Abigail, both of which have access to drugs through their respective sources. Despite being down the line a decent bit, Sam has got some shit that even his bloodhound of a mother can’t find, that guy grew up lying to his mom. Anyway, Sam is pretty chill to hang around, he’ll probably talk about music and video games the entire time, but a lot of people are into that stuff, so he’s a pretty good guy to chill with. However, the time it takes between him getting drugs from Sebastian or Abigail then using up a week’s supply is very short, so you must act fast if you want a chance to be with Sam.

#15: Lewis

You’re telling me that the mayor of a town consisting of 24 other people gives enough tax money in order to build a SOLID GOLD STATUE of himself? This statue is solid gold! Not laminated! That either took years to establish, or the guy has a secret drug empire. And I think it’s the latter. Lewis totally buys the drugs from Qi, then sells it at an astronomical price to the Governor. Yeah, the Governor. Why do you think Lewis smooches him up every year at the Luau! Lewis has drugs and is willing to sell it to you, so he can build another solid gold statue of himself, but it’s so pricey that it’s not worth it. Another governmental secret to take to the grave… Yippee.

#14: Alex

Alex is probably willing to do anything to go pro, including taking steroids. Those books that he never reads but are never dusty? Yeah, there’s a big ass stash behind there. He’s willing to share if you’re a dude and give the ‘right’ reason why you want them (sports rather than anything else logical for a farmer). But if you’re a girl good luck, the misogyny runs strong within him until you kind of send him on a character arc.

#13: Shane

He’s stealing from Marnie, that much is obvious, dude’s so broke from spending his money on alcohol that he has none left for drugs. It’s not like Marnie is going to tell him to stop, so he has free rein of Marnie’s stash. If you get him drunk enough first, then he’s surprisingly willing to join you. Just note that he will drop all his traumas and life story on you, Shane will become an integral member of the Nightmare Blunt Rotation Circle™.

#12: Elliot

Consider the daily struggle of writers and consider how Elliot can actually write a good book that fast… Drugs, obviously. You see, very few people could have the patience to speak like Shakespeare on a daily basis and somehow still make it understandable to the average Joe, AND still hold the best hair in the Valley (fight me). In fact, I’m bold enough to say that nobody has the patience to do all of that, the obvious answer is a constant influx of magic mushrooms provided by Leah. The main difference between the two is that Leah is more likely to show you all the good spots for forage, Elliot will straight up hand it to you as some poetic declaration of love.

#11: Gil

After living a long time and serving the Adventurer’s Guild for so long, I think Gil would have to do something to pass the long hours of sitting around. So, despite Marlon’s protests, he snorts skeleton bone crack. Is Gil isn’t out of his mind of skeleton crack then he’s totally get you some, you just have to catch him at the right time (before 2pm, good luck).

#10: Abigail

Abigail has full access to Caroline’s ‘tea’ garden, unlike Pierre, and she has access to whatever the hell Sebastian has on him at any time. So she’s got plenty of people to send you to and plenty of drugs to share. Overall, Abigail is a solid choice to go to, and she’d be cool to hang with as well. Maybe just don’t go to the mines with her to snort crack because nobody needs another grave hanging around the cemetery that Abigail can no longer visit.

#9: Linus

While we are collectively unsure of the reason Linus decided to live out in the wild and cosplay a caveman, I can obviously determine that the man has so much planted around the valley. Weed? Oh yeah, that’s at the train tracks behind the bath house, nobody bothers to go up beyond that point! Cocaine? He talks to the travelling trader a lot. You name it, he has it. He’s also friends with the wizard, which should be enough proof in the first place. The only reason he’s ranked here is that everybody else is practically on par with him.

#8: Emily

As long as you are fine with spiritual shit and dancing, then Emily is the person you should go to. I mean, at least Emily isn’t like some of those weird spiritual people that you can sometimes meet, she’s just cool and into crystals and their meanings. Anyway, Emily is cool, would hit you up with whatever she’s got, and you would probably learn about crystals more than you should? 8/10 experience, would go again.

#7: Caroline

That tea cutscene? That greenhouse? Married to Pierre? Yeah, Caroline is not just growing tea in that greenhouse of hers. She is absolutely willing to share because her only friend is Jodi, and we already covered her drug dog tendencies. Also, being married to Pierre is already hell on earth, so she will take anything that she can get (this includes a friend). Should I mention that she totally had a fling with the wizard? Who would totally hand out drugs at any given moment for a solar essence? Yeah, Caroline is cool, and she is a great candidate to ask for drugs and hang with.

#6: Leah

Let’s face it, there is no way in hell that Leah wasn’t high while making that statue, yeah, that one. Also, she just forages around for her food on a daily basis, I wouldn’t be surprised if she came across one of Linus’s stashes. Also, she would hand around Linus and do magic mushrooms, fall in the valley is the best season for them after all. She will show you all the best spots, her favourite is the cliff wall behind the Wizard’s tower where all sorts of weird shit grows. It’s best not to ask the origins of it, only how high it will make you.

#5: Krobus

C’mon, you just know that he has drugs down in that sewer, he probably provides come cool stuff to the Wizard to experiment with every now and again. Also, if you are roommates with him, you will also get the experience with hanging around with the coolest creature around. 10/10, always go to Krobus.

#4: Birdie

The fairy dust is not the only thing that is magical about Birdie, her island based drugs are astronomical. She has access to things that very few can even bother to search for, go to Birdie to have a riveting conversation about the sea while being high as fuck.

#3: Sebastian

Sebastian buys primarily from Qi, in fact, he’s Qi’s best buyer, so it’s obvious that he has stuff on hand, and he’s willing to hand stuff out as well. The thing that makes Sebastian so high on the list in comparison to others is the fact that, like Linus, he has everything. Go to Sebastian, any angsty rants about his stepdad and wanting to leave the Valley will be worth anything that Sebastian has got from Qi.

#2: Wizard

In your very first cutscene with this guy, you get handed some forestry concoction that could totally be considered a drug. The shit this guy has is phenomenal, and he is willing to give it out as long as you have a couple void essence to spare as repayment. Any failed potions or concoctions are being chucked out the window into the concerning lack of wildlife in the valley, all for Leah to watch crazy ass mushrooms to grow then snort them.

#1: Mr Qi

Where do you think Sebastian’s getting the drugs? Qi runs an empire much larger than Lewis’s statues, Pierre’s money hounding, and Joja’s corporation desires would ever think of having. Qi is the sole reason why Stardew is still holding a half decent economy before you started mass-producing starfruit wine. If you want any kind of drug, you go to Qi, he’s got you covered.

Bonus: Hat Mouse

Hat Mouse is cool, go to hat mouse. Hat mouse has drugs.

---

And that's a wrap! I hoped you found as much fun in this as I did for the past 2 months when I found time, and I guess the real questions are:

Who would you go to for drugs in the Valley?

Should I post this to my ao3 for shits and giggles?

#stardew valley #stardew #sdv #I'm not tagging every villager no way #taag talks #Jodi's part is my favourite #but Lewis is really close as a second #Youtube

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animezin-ph · 3 months ago

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An Anime-Mental-Health-Themed Blog

Hey guys!

My name is Fuegio, and here's some information about me!

Age: 22

Pronouns: he/him

Identity: Transgender Man

Birthday: November 28, 2001

Nationality: Filipino

Passion: Anime

Advocacy: Mental health Awareness

Purpose in Life: To sow seeds of change; to change the world

(below is my Original Character, Fuegio, named after me! He's the mascot of Animezin PH. I had the artwork made in FIVERR since idk how to digitally draw yet hehe)

Also here in my blog, you can find my posts that are anime analyses with this: #analysis

And you can find anime guideposts with: #guide.

You can find me on Medium

My Personal Account

Also, if you read on Medium, you can find me there using the link below!

I post anything related to anime, mental health, and my opinions and beliefs (which may not necessarily be about anime or mental health)

Our Publication "Animezin PH"

In medium, I created a publication specifically for Animezin PH, where we share stories and articles about Anime and Mental Health!

Check out the link below and leave a follow! :D

Animezin PH – Medium

What You can expect from me:

The Anime-Lover

I really love anime, and I've loved watching anime since I was in elementary school / since I was a kid! :D

I'd like to share my thoughts and insights on anime through this Tumblr blog.

This is going to be like an online diary for me, but specifically for anime.

My favorite anime(s) are: My Hero Academia, Wind Breaker, Moriarty the Patriot, and Demon Slayer.

The Mental Health Advocate

A quick gist on my background: I suffer from Bipolar Disorder, Depression, Gender Dysphoria, and C-PTSD.

But despite those diagnoses, I've found my way back into light and peace through an amazing (or should I say ANIME-zin) journey. And I want something similar for everyone, because everyone deserves love, patience, kindness, and care.

A lot of inspiration I got from anime. A lot of foundations built were from anime.

And in this blog, I am not just going to talk about anime and random thoughts (though some posts will be like that), but I will mainly add the twist of talking about mental health with anime!

With that,

I would like to thank you all in advance for your future support and love!

I really plan to build a community that's a safe space for many anime fans. My main target are Filipino anime fans because I, too, am Filipino, and I think Mental Health Awareness should really be spread here in the Philippines, but of course, I will not limit this community to them! :D

I hope we can all make this dream of mine come true! <3

I am still preparing my YouTube Channel for video content similar to the theme of this blog. But you can subscribe already here: Animezin PH - YouTube

(I'm actually going to start learning animation... aaaaa im excited!)

By the way,

Why don't we get to know one another better? :DD

Just for fun, I want to ask:

Depending on your answers, I could make more posts on that anime! I would also love to watch new anime not in the choices above and see what I could learn from them and you all!

Ko-fi donations

If you enjoy my posts, or just love what I'm doing like spreading mental health through anime, I'd be super grateful if you'd consider buying me a coffee (or two)!! ☕️☕️ :D

Every little bit helps me create more anime-mental health-inspired content!

Your support means the world to me, and it allows me to keep doing what I love!

Thank you so much for being a part of this ANIMEZIN journey with me! Whether you can donate, reblog, or share the link, it all helps!

Click the link below to donate:

GCASH Donations

If you are based in the Philippines, you can send your donation through the GCASH QR Code below!

Don't forget to leave a comment below or send me a PM if you've sent a donation so I'd be aware that it's from you!

ARIGATOU GOZAIMASU!

- Fuegio

#anime #anime and manga #self improvement #self help #self care #mental health #mental health support #mental health awareness #new blog #my hero academia #mha #wind breaker #demon slayer #filipino #bnha #gcash #donate #donations #donation post

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polyamorouspunk · 1 year ago

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what is your opinion on youtubers promoting things and having ads? especially those who actually don't really care or like the product

I'm trying to find the Punk Opinion on it because I'm not sure on my opinions on it and just wanna know what you think

There is only one YouTuber out there I know who won’t promote Better Help because of the controversy over them. Literally every. other. fucking. YouTuber. podcaster. promotes Better Help. As a true crime listener, all I know is Simply Safe, Better Help, Hello Fresh, June’s Journey, and Madison Reed. Yeah, I don’t enjoy getting force-fed ads. No one does. I appreciate when the ads I’m force-fed are at least done in a creative way, and I understand for a LOT of smaller content creators, that is how they get paid and that is how their shit gets produced. Hell, I have a GREAT concept for a podcast, but I do not have the funds to successfully create it. If someone wanted to pay me to run ads on my hypothetical podcast, I am signing the fuck up for that sponsorship. There’s a reason that you can pay to have no ads, though. Multiple podcasts I listen to have a paid version of their podcast that is ad free. Obviously same goes for Spotify and Tumblr and shit. I understand that it’s the way of the world, and that without change nothing changes, but like I think overturning ad culture isn’t as high on people’s to-do list as like making sure that people have access to healthcare and shit like that. I know the same YouTuber I mentioned up top actually ran an ad for a tea subscription service and probably pulled one of those “what a great gift for the tea lover in your life” or something and I was like wow that actually is a good idea and for Mother’s Day I got my mom a tea subscription, not to that company, but a different one, so like that’s one case in which an ad actually worked for me. Also, some ads are just better than others. Ones where creators are allowed to talk through it are better I think than audio/video clips in the middle of a video or something. Creators can also choose where to put ads which is nice. I love when podcasters introduce the ad section so I can just slam that skip 30s button. I’m mutuals with a podcaster I listen to weekly on a different blog of mine, I know she runs her show herself. She does have a Better Help sponsorship, she does June’s Journey and Simply Safe a lot too. I like her content, I’m glad her content exists, she does have a paid version of her show without ads, which is don’t subscribe to. I’m fine with having to deal with ads if it means not paying extra for things honestly. Free media isn’t free when you have to deal with ads and yeah it’s gotten worse over the years but I don’t think enough people care about it or care enough about it to really do anything about it as a systemic problem vs Adpocolypse #357 on YouTube.

TL;DR I hate ad culture, I don’t buy shit that I get ads for, but there are bigger problems out there so I don’t see anything really changing so I’ll continue to listen to ads so I, personally, can save money instead of paying for ad-free stuff.

#punk gets mail #ad culture

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fromchaostocosmos · 22 days ago

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The law firm hired by Mr. Beast to investigate internally cleared the company of wrongdoing after a 3 month investigation and 39 interviews. I don't know how these things work, but that doesn't feel like enough time to me to do a proper job and 39 interviews doesn't feel like enough interviews.

I find it very suspect, but again this is not an arena I know enough about.

A law firm that investigated accusations of sexual misconduct and grooming within the organization of the YouTube star MrBeast said on Friday that it found no evidence to support those claims. The investigation came after allegations surfaced against Ava Tyson, a frequent collaborator with MrBeast, whose name is Jimmy Donaldson. Public accusations were made that Ms. Tyson had used inappropriate language and had engaged in grooming behavior with a minor. The law firm, Quinn Emanuel Urquhart & Sullivan, which was hired by Mr. Donaldson’s company, said in its report that over three months it had conducted 39 interviews of current and former employees and reviewed more than four million documents collected from phones, emails and other messaging platforms. “Allegations of sexual misconduct (e.g., pedophilia, grooming, child pornography, etc.) between company employees and minors are without basis,” the report said. “The allegations were soundly rejected, including by alleged victims.” Online accusations began this year after social media users scrutinized interactions between Ms. Tyson and the minor, who goes by the online handle LavaGS, when Ms. Tyson was 20 and he was 13. At the time, both Ms. Tyson and LavaGS denied any predatory behavior. In July, as public outcry grew, Ms. Tyson denied any wrongdoing but apologized for any “past behavior or comments if it hurt or offended anyone,” and said that she would step away from MrBeast’s company and social media. The next day, Mr. Donaldson, whose YouTube channel has 326 million subscribers, and who has turned the venture into a marketing juggernaut, announced that he would part ways with Ms. Tyson. In a post on X, he also said that he had hired an independent investigator. “I’ve seen enough online and taken immediate action to remove Ava from the company, my channel, and any association with MrBeast,” he wrote on social media. “I do not condone or support any of the inappropriate actions.” On Friday, LavaGS responded to the law firm’s findings, writing on social media that he had been interviewed. “I was not groomed, these were false allegations made up by other people with my name thrown in them,” he wrote on X. “This investigation was conducted by real investigators and not internet detectives. They reviewed everything.” The findings came during a tumultuous year for Mr. Donaldson’s channel, which is known for elaborate stunts, including real-life “Squid Game” re-creations and huge cash giveaways. This summer, an older video circulated online of Mr. Donaldson making comments about buying Black people. A representative said at the time that “after making some bad jokes and other mistakes when he was younger, as an adult he has focused on engaging with the MrBeast community to work together on making a positive impact around the world.” And in September, a group of contestants who had taken part in a competitive series put on by Mr. Donaldson called “Beast Games” filed a lawsuit that accused the production companies behind the show of exposing them to dangerous conditions. The contestants claimed, in part, that they had not received adequate food or medical care, and that they had not been appropriately compensated. Although the law firm’s report did not find evidence of sexual misconduct, it did identify several unspecified “isolated instances of workplace harassment and misconduct.” It said the company quickly worked to remedy those concerns. “The company has already implemented or is in the process of implementing changes to ensure a safe and professional corporate culture today and moving forward,” the report said.

Reading articles about MrBeast's dominance of YouTube is fucking bizarre because, from my perspective, the dude isn't even on YouTube. I've never watched one of his videos. YouTube has, to the best of my knowledge, never recommended one of his videos to me. Every thumbnail screenshot of his looks like something you could tell me was a photoshopped parody of YouTube culture, and I'd believe you. No one I follow on YouTube ever mentions him, even negatively or in passing. The first time I ever heard his name was in regards to the quality of his ghost kitchens. The only way I know he isn't a mass, shared hallucination is that I've witnessed the thoroughly mid-looking chocolate bars he sells at Walmart for some reason

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newsworld11 · 22 days ago

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sailingtrinity · 1 month ago

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Sailing A Big Fat Greek Wedding And Catamaran Crash In 72 hours... | ft. IonianMode

Sailing, A Big Fat Greek Wedding, And Catamaran Crash In 72 hours... | ft. IonianMode 🇬🇷 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5m9dak_tmbk #sailingadventure #ionianmode #sivota Join us THIS WEEK as we sail to sivota bay for A BIG FAT GREEK WEDDING. Running into some out of control catamarans, and a HUGE season adventure planning session on the way... ✨Limited time offer! 🧭 Navigate smarter, not harder. Get 10% off Sailserver 2 with code TRINITY10: https://ift.tt/2fdErqV ✨Power your adventures for less! ☀️ Get 5% off all LANPWR Solar Products with code TRINITY5: https://ift.tt/GAXeQRh + ✨Here's the link to the Energy Calculator spreadsheet - Download Our FREE Energy Calculation Tool! https://bit.ly/3Y7qylX !! Please visit our website to get more information: https://ift.tt/dIVLZG7 🔔Escape to a more nature-filled and free lifestyle by following our sailing and exploration journey on our vlogs and travel documentaries. Don't forget to subscribe: / @svtrinitytube 🔗Support Our Channel: ☕Buy us a coffee: https://ift.tt/KaMto3l ✅ Stay Connected With Us. 👉Facebook: / sailing.svtrinity 👉Instagram: / svtrinityinsta 👉Instagram(Tay's Instagram): / taysherr 👉Pinterest: https://ift.tt/8xkHLot... 👉Website: https://ift.tt/dIVLZG7 ✅ For Business Inquiries: [email protected] ============================= ✅ Recommended Playlists 👉 WINTER SEASON VLOGS • Ready To Sail: Winter Boat Prep With ... 👉 BOAT REPAIR VLOGS • First Haul Out: Our Sailboat's Big Da... ✅ Other Videos You Might Be Interested In Watching: 👉 Winter KILLED our Yacht!! Season Prep Deep Clean + Revival (Deck, Boom, Cushions, Windows) • How Winter Destroyed Our Yacht! Epic ... 👉 KILLER Black Mold ATTACK: Satisfying Deep Clean Removal On YACHT (Vinyl+Silicone) Easy Removal Tips! • Satisfying Yacht Clean-Up: Safe & Eff... 👉 Will WE Ever Stop? Never-Ending MARINA Boat Upgrades | Lefkada, Greece • Can We Ever Finish? Exciting Upgrades... 👉 How is our BOAT so DIFFERENT now?! | Boat repair in Ionian Marine • Yacht Transformation: Major Boat Repa... 👉 What it's REALLY LIKE wintering a YACHT in Greece! - anti-foul+rigging • Surviving Winter On A Yacht In Greece... ============================= ✅ About Sailing Trinity. We're an AussieXIrish family who traded in fast-paced living for a life closer to nature and each other! Join Taylor, Sharon, and Martin in transitioning to sustainable, slow sailboat living with little experience. Come aboard our Jenneau Sun Odyssey 50DS, TRINITY, as we navigate the seas, shifting our focus to off-grid living and real human experiences as we chase freedom and challenge together! We hope that our journey inspires you in this remarkable voyage called life. We create sailing/travel/educational documentary-style vlogs, with VIDEOS OUT every WEEKEND!💙 For Collaboration and Business inquiries, please use the contact information below: 📩 Email: [email protected] 🔔Are you looking for a way to escape the hustle and bustle of everyday life & embrace a more natural & free lifestyle? Join us on our sailing and exploration journey through our vlogs & travel documentaries. Subscribe now: / @svtrinitytube ================================= #sailingfamily #ionianislands #sailingvlog ⚠️DISCLAIMER: We do not accept any liability for any loss or damage incurred from you acting or not acting as a result of watching any of our publications. You acknowledge that you use the information we provide at your own risk. Do your research. Copyright Notice: This video and our YouTube channel contain dialogue, music, and images that are the property of Sailing Trinity. You are authorized to share the video link and channel and embed this video in your website or others as long as a link back to our YouTube channel is provided. © Sailing Trinity via Sailing Trinity https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCvZVfYn0G44Gqv4oW7nmsKA October 26, 2024 at 02:30AM

#sailingdocumentary #sailingvlog #sailingtrinity #boatlifestyle #liveaboardlife #travelfamilyvlogs #traveldocumentary #travelvlogging

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dankusner · 3 months ago

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HOW JOE ROGAN REMADE AUSTIN

The podcaster and comedian has turned the city into a haven for manosphere influencers, just-asking-questions tech bros, and other “free thinkers” who happen to all think alike.

SEPTEMBER 11, 2024

It’s a Tuesday night in downtown Austin, and Joe Rogan is pretending to jerk off right in front of my face.

The strangest thing about this situation is that millions of straight American men would kill to switch places with me.

Centimillionaires generally pride themselves on their inaccessibility, but most weeks you can see Rogan live at the Comedy Mothership, which he owns, in exchange for $50 and a two-drink minimum.

About 250 tickets for each “Joe Rogan and Friends” show go on sale every Sunday at 2 p.m. central time, and disappear within seconds.

When you arrive at the Mothership, the staff locks your phone in a bag, which both ensures that you cannot leak footage online and makes you think you’re about to see some really forbidden shit.

You are not.

What you will see is four comedians, plus Rogan himself, with routines that might shock the Amish, the over-80 set, college students, Vox staffers, or John Oliver superfans—but not anyone who, say, went to a comedy club in the 1990s. Of the many recent failures of the American left, one of the greatest is making entry-level battle-of-the-sexes humor seem avant-garde.

(Did you know that women often run relationship decisions past their female friends? Bitches be crazy! That sort of thing.)

As Rogan himself says after he emerges in stonewashed jeans, clutching a glass of something amber on ice:

“Fox News called this an anti-woke comedy club. That’s just a comedy club!”

To underline the point that these jokes can survive outside the safe space of the Mothership, much of the material I saw Rogan perform ended up in his latest Netflix special, which was released in August.

In Austin, the masturbation mimicry happens during a riff about concealing his porn consumption from his wife—“the best person I know,” he says, sweetly.

That routine captures the essence of the Joe Rogan brand:

He is bawdy around his fans, respectful of his wife, loyal to his friends, and indulgent with his golden retriever, who has 900,000 followers on Instagram.

He maintains a self-deprecating sense of humor that’s rare among men who could buy an island if they wanted one.

His politics defy easy categorization—he hates Democratic finger-wagging but supports gay marriage and abortion rights.

(“I’m so far away from being a Republican,” he said on a podcast in 2022.)

He voted for a third-party candidate in 2020, and in early August expressed his admiration for Robert F. Kennedy Jr., a former guest on The Joe Rogan Experience.

He also wonders if President Biden might have been replaced by a body double.

(Does he have any evidence? Sure, the guy looks taller now.)

He sees himself as an outsider, nontribal, just an average Joe.

The best way to think of him, one of my friends told me, is as if “Homer Simpson got swole.”

Another way to think of him: as perhaps the single most influential person in the United States.

His YouTube channel has 17 million subscribers.

His podcast, The Joe Rogan Experience, which launched in 2009, has held the top spot on the Spotify charts consistently for the past five years; he records two or three episodes a week, each running to several hours.

The former Democratic presidential candidate Andrew Yang, whose campaign for universal basic income went viral after a Rogan appearance five years ago, calls him “the male Oprah.”

Rogan now lives in Austin, which has recently become known for its transformation from chilled-out live-music paradise to a miniature version of the Bay Area—similarly full of tech workers, but with fewer IN THIS HOUSE, WE BELIEVE … signs.

Early in the coronavirus pandemic, the Texas capital saw the biggest net gain of remote employees of any major city in America; its downtown is now filled with cranes and new skyscrapers.

It is also the center of the Roganverse, an intellectual firmament of manosphere influencers, productivity optimizers, stand-ups, and male-wellness gurus.

Austin is at the nexus of a Venn diagram of “has culture,” “has gun ranges,” “has low taxes,” and “has kombucha.”

The science and technology writer Tim Urban, who runs the popular Wait but Why website, told me that he moved to Austin from New York City because “I would have the experience of talking to someone I respect—some writer friend of mine, or someone who’s in a similar kind of career—and I would think, Oh, you’re in Austin too.”

The city attracts people with a distinct set of political positions that don’t exactly line up with either main party.

They might be religious but are equally likely to be “spiritual.”

They shoot guns but worry about seed oils.

They are relaxed about gay people but often traditional about gender.

They dabble with psychedelic drugs but worry about drinking caffeine first thing in the morning.

Their numbers might be relatively small in electoral terms, but they transmit their values to the rest of America through podcasts, YouTube, and other platforms largely outside the view of mainstream media.

Go to a cocktail mixer, an ayahuasca party, or a Brazilian-jiu-jitsu gym here and you might run into Tim Ferriss, the author of The 4-Hour Workweek; or the podcasters Lex Fridman, Chris Williamson, Ryan Holiday, Michael Malice, or Aubrey Marcus.

Elon Musk is so keen to get people to move to Texas that he is planning an entire community outside Austin called Snailbrook for workers at his Tesla Gigafactory and the Boring Company.

(In case you’re wondering: Yes, every one of these men has been on Rogan’s podcast.)

“It’s amazing that the arrival of one person could change a whole town, but it does feel like Rogan did that,” the journalist Sarah Hepola, who started her career at The Austin Chronicle, told me.

“It’s a lot like the dot-com invasion of the ’90s, like something that happened to the town.”

Your guide to today's biggest stories, boldest ideas, and best in culture.

From the April 2024 issue: Is Kara Swisher tearing down tech billionaires—or burnishing their legends?

Rogan and his fans are often called “heterodox,” which is funny, because this group has converged on a set of shared opinions, creating what you might call a heterodox orthodoxy: Diversity-and-inclusion initiatives mean that identity counts more than merit; COVID rules were too strict; the pandemic probably started with a lab leak in China; the January 6 insurrection was not as bad as liberals claim; gender medicine for children is out of control; the legacy media are scolding and biased; and so on.

The heterodox sphere has low trust in institutions—the press, academia, the CDC—and prefers to listen to individuals.

The Roganverse neatly caters to this audience because it is, in essence, a giant talk-show circuit: Go on The Joe Rogan Experience, and you can book another half dozen appearances on other shows to talk about what you said there.

I wanted to ask Rogan about all this: about the world that has coalesced around him, about the intellectual culture that he is exporting from Austin, about what his appeal might mean for November’s election.

Past research by the marketing firm Morning Consult suggests that his fans are mostly male, predominantly white but a quarter Hispanic, and right-leaning but not locked in for Donald Trump.

In other words, he has a nationwide base that both major parties would be delighted to win over—and that Kennedy was clearly desperate to recruit.

But one does not interview Joe Rogan.

No human in history has needed publicity less, and he routinely turns down requests, including mine.

So that’s how I ended up in the front row at the Comedy Mothership, cheerfully observing the two-drink minimum with the $8 canned water Liquid Death, face-to-groin with the male Oprah.

In May 2020, a couple of months into the pandemic, Rogan—then living in Los Angeles—visited Austin.

“I went to a restaurant with my kids and they were like, ‘We don’t have to wear a mask?’ ” he recalled three years later. “Two months later, I lived here.”

He bought an eight-bedroom house for $14.4 million just to the east of the city, backing onto Lake Austin.

Barely half an hour from the congested traffic of downtown, Rogan’s house is set among scrubby hills, behind a gated driveway on a dead-end road.

Although Rogan’s ability to make headlines blew up during the pandemic, he has been famous for a long time.

He was in the cast of the ’90s sitcom NewsRadio and hosted NBC’s reality show Fear Factor, while building a parallel career as a mixed-martial-arts commentator.

Follow his Instagram, and his tastes soon become apparent: energy drinks, killing wild animals, badly lit steaks, migraine-inducing AI graphics, dad-rock playlists, and shooting the breeze with his buddies.

The last of these has been greatly helped by the opening of the Comedy Mothership, in March 2023.

The newest star here is Tony Hinchcliffe, who in April took part in Netflix’s gleefully offensive roast of Tom Brady and was featured on a Variety cover.

The latter was a sign of a mood shift, given that he has never apologized for using an anti-Chinese slur onstage in 2021 to describe a fellow comic.

Hinchcliffe hosts his own podcast, Kill Tony, which is now recorded at the Mothership, and he has helped set the tone for Austin’s new comedy scene.

“There is no victim mentality whatsoever in Texas,” Hinchcliffe told Variety, adding, “It’s a different little island that we’ve created.”

He was on the bill both nights I went to the Mothership, and wore a huge belt buckle with TONY HINCHCLIFFE written on it—presumably for situations in which he is both taking off his trousers and unable to remember who he is.

He has very white teeth and a predatory grin, and he throws out jokes that double as tests:

Can you handle this, wimp?

On the first night, Rogan was also accompanied by Shane Gillis, a puppy dog of a comedian.

In 2019, Gillis was hired as a Saturday Night Live cast member and then fired four days later, after it was reported that he’d previously used an anti-Asian slur in a bit on his podcast and once described the director Judd Apatow as “gayer than ISIS.”

Gillis apologized, lay low for a while, and built what is now the biggest podcast on the crowdfunding platform Patreon.

He then self-financed his own comedy special, Live in Austin, which has 30 million views on YouTube—and promoted it with an appearance on The JRE.

(Gillis has since been on Rogan’s show more than a dozen times.)

His continued appeal thus demonstrated, Gillis returned to SNL as a host in February.

Rogan’s support of Gillis demonstrates why members of his inner circle are so loyal to him.

Not only has Rogan personally boosted their careers on his podcast and in his club, but his popularity has forced the comedy industry to recalibrate its tolerance for offense.

The best marketing slogan in American history has to be “People don’t want you to hear this, but …” What fans love about Rogan is the same thing his critics hate: an untamable curiosity that makes him open to plainly marginal ideas.

One guest tells him that black holes are awesome.

A second tells him that the periodic table needs to be updated because carbon has a “bisexual tone.”

A third tells him that a deworming drug could wipe out COVID.

He approaches all of them—tenured professors, harmless crackpots, peddlers of pseudoscience—with the same stoner wonderment.

The liberal case against Rogan usually references one of two culture-war flash points: COVID and gender. Media Matters for America, a progressive journalism-watchdog organization, has accused Rogan and his guests of using his podcast to “promote conspiracy theorists and push anti-trans rhetoric.”

In March 2013, the mixed martial artist Fallon Fox knocked out an opponent in 39 seconds and afterward revealed that she had been born male. A few days later, in an eight-minute riff on The JRE, Rogan said he was happy to call Fox “her,” but didn’t think she should compete against biological females. “I say if you had a dick at one point in time, you also have all the bone structure that comes with having a dick,” he added. Rogan’s choice of language aside, this was a claim that most Americans would deem uncontroversial: In general, biological males are physically stronger and faster than biological females. His comments prompted a media backlash, because he had violated an emerging consensus on the institutional left that trans women could compete fairly in women’s sports and that sex differences were overstated.

Read: Helen Lewis on Trump’s red-pill podcast tour “Free health care—yes!” Rogan tells his audiences these days onstage in Austin, riffing on the political demands of the left. “Education for all—right on! … Men can get pregnant—fuck! I didn’t realize it was a package deal.”

During the pandemic, The JRE also drew audience members who were frustrated with the limits of acceptable discussion, at a time when Facebook and YouTube were banning or restricting what they labeled misinformation. Rogan didn’t accept the proposition that Americans should shut up and listen to mainstream experts, and that led to him hosting vaccine denialists and conspiracists, and promoting an unproven deworming drug as a treatment for COVID. True, he has a fact-checker—his producer Jamie Vernon, known to fans as Young Jamie, or “Pull That Up, Jamie,” after Rogan’s frequent instruction to him. But correcting what Rogan and his guests say about multiple conflicting studies during a live podcast is impossible. And to give you an idea of Vernon’s place in the hierarchy, he also makes Rogan coffee.

During the pandemic, the decision to host cranks such as Robert Malone—a researcher who claimed to have invented mRNA technology but sought to cast doubt on vaccines that employ it—resulted in a critical open letter signed by hundreds of health experts, a warning label from Spotify, and a gentle rebuke from the White House press secretary. However, Rogan also gave voice to those who felt that some COVID policies, such as outdoor masking and long-running school closures, were unsupported by evidence. A phrase that you will find throughout the right-wing and heterodox media ecosystems is noble lie. This refers to the fact that Anthony Fauci initially told regular people not to wear masks in part because he was worried about supply shortages for doctors and nurses, but it has come to stand in for the wider accusation that public-health experts did not trust Americans with complex data during the pandemic, and instead simply told them what to do.

You don’t have to look far in Austin to find the caucus of disaffected liberals that Rogan represents. On my second night at the Mothership, the ushers parked me next to Stephan, a house renovator whose business was booming thanks to all the rich newcomers to the city. He had left San Diego during the pandemic, he told me, because “they caution-taped the whole coastline.” A few days earlier, I had met another of these “leftugees,” as one transplant jokingly nicknamed them, over coffee at Russell’s Bakery. The writer Alana Joblin Ain is a rabbi’s wife and a lifelong Democrat who before the pandemic lived happily in New York City and then San Francisco. In the summer of 2020, though, her children’s public school announced that it would remain closed into a second academic year, making her worry about the effect on their social skills and academic progress. She moved her son and daughter to a private school nearby—but on the penultimate day of the summer term in 2021, the head of school announced plans to convert its main bathrooms to gender-neutral ones, in part to help “kindergartners who [are] non-binary” and “kindergartners who are trans.”

When Ain questioned the policy—suggesting instead that some gender-neutral bathrooms should be provided alongside the existing girls’ and boys’ bathrooms—she was ostracized, she said. One father told her that her “wanting a space I feel more comfortable in, that’s a female space, reminded him of segregationists.” The dispute reminded her of other ways she’d felt alienated from the left. While helping her husband tend to his congregation, she had seen marital strife, substance abuse, suicide attempts, and other harms that she attributed to prolonged lockdowns.

And so she made the same journey that Rogan did, leaving California for Texas in 2022. She now runs an off-the-record discussion group called Moontower Verses, which meets in person to discuss culture-war topics. She doesn’t know how she will vote in November. Her experience echoes that of other Rogan fans on the coasts, for whom the pandemic brought the realization that their values differed from those around them; at the time, the persistence of masking was a visible symbol of that difference. “It’s the Democrats’ MAGA hat,” Rogan told a guest in November 2022. “They’re letting you know, I’m on the good team.” Move to Texas, went the promise, and you won’t have to see that anymore.

Read: Joe Rogan’s show may be dumb. But is it actually deadly? A sense of left-wing overreach also drove the creation of the new University of Austin, or UATX. (The school’s website once boasted about Austin, “If it’s good enough for Elon Musk and Joe Rogan, it’s good enough for us.”) The announcement of the university’s launch in 2021 attracted immediate mockery, with The New York Times’ Nikole Hannah-Jones describing it as “Trump University at Austin,” after the former president’s scam-bucket operation.

That was unfair: UATX is run by serious academics, and has raised enough money to give free tuition to its entire founding class of 100. It has, however, leaned into the Roganite philosophy that people must tolerate wacko ideas in order to hear intriguingly heretical ones. In 2022, UATX offered a first taste of its politics when it ran a summer school, called Forbidden Courses, in Dallas. The speakers included UATX co-founder Bari Weiss (canceled by haters on Slack and Twitter), Peter Boghossian (canceled by Portland State University), Ayaan Hirsi Ali (canceled by a literal fatwa), Kathleen Stock (canceled by the University of Sussex), and my fellow Atlantic writer Thomas Chatterton Williams (inexplicably not canceled). When I visited the UATX offices, in an Art Deco building in downtown Austin, the provost, Jacob Howland, told me that he wanted “to get the politics out of the classroom,” and that faculty members will have succeeded if the students can’t guess how they vote from what they say in class.

Just as in Rogan’s comedy club, smartphones are banned in class—“so that students can’t be distracted by them, or, for example, record other students and tell the world, ‘Oh, you know, this student had this opinion, and it’s unacceptable, and I’m putting it out there on TikTok.’ ”

Many on the left, however, suspect that heterodox just means “right-wing and in denial.” An attendee at last year’s Forbidden Courses sent me a slide showing survey results about the students’ political leanings: Out of 29 respondents, 19 identified as conservative. One major UATX donor is Harlan Crow, the billionaire who has bankrolled Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas’s lifestyle for years; he sat in the back of some 2023 summer-school lectures. Another is the Austin-based venture capitalist Joe Lonsdale, who co-founded Palantir with Peter Thiel and others. He recently gave $1 million to a pro-Trump super PAC.

“We really are open to all comers,” Howland told me. He wondered whether some people on the left simply didn’t want to hear any debate.

The Joe Rogan coalition may indeed represent a real strand in American intellectual and political life—a normie suspicion of both MAGA hats and eternal masking, mixed with tolerance for kooky ideas. But it is fracturing.

“Anti-wokeness” once encompassed everyone who could agree that Drew Barrymore’s talk show was annoying, that some left-wing activists on TikTok were out of control, and that corporations were largely banging on about diversity to sell more products rather than out of a genuine commitment to human flourishing. Underneath those headline beliefs, however, were two distinct groups: disaffected liberals and actual conservatives, bound together by a common enemy. “Some of the people who seemed like my comrades on Twitter a while back,” Tim Urban told me, “I start to see some of them say stuff like ‘See, you start with gay marriage, and now you’ve got drag queens in this kindergarten class.’ And, well, hold on a second.”

Today, fractures are obvious across the wider anti-woke movement—and they must be serious, because people have started podcasting about them. Watching Rogan’s stand-up set, I realized that much of his culture-war material was now three or four years old; his podcast is one of the only places I still hear COVID mentioned, as Rogan relitigates the criticism he received during the pandemic. There’s a real tension in the Roganverse between the stated desire to escape polarization and the appeal of living in an endless 2020, when the sharp definition of the opposing sides yielded growing audiences and made unlikely political alliances possible.

Those contradictory impulses are evident in Austin. Jon Stokes, a co-founder of the AI company Symbolic, described the city to me as the “DMZ of the culture wars,” while the podcaster David Perell put it like this: “Moving to Austin is the geographical equivalent of saying ‘I don’t read the news anymore.’ ”

Helen Lewis: What’s genuinely weird about the online right But national politics inevitably intrude. In front of the Texas capitol one sunny day, I found myself surrounded by a sea of pink and blue—a Christian rally against the “grooming” of children by LGBTQ activists through sex education in schools. A speaker was telling the crowd about a concealed, well-funded agenda centered on “the dismemberment of the heart and soul of your children.”

These are not Rogan’s politics. But relentless criticism from the left has pushed him and his fellow travelers closer to people who talk like this. Look at Elon Musk, who has developed an obsession with defeating the “woke mind virus” and an addiction to posting about his grievances.

At its worst, The Joe Rogan Experience is one of America’s top venues for rich and powerful people to complain about being publicly contradicted, and Rogan’s own feelings of kinship with the canceled mean that he has repeatedly hosted guests whose views are recklessly extreme.

This unwise loyalty is most evident in his friendship with the conspiracy theorist Alex Jones. In 2022, the Infowars founder was ordered to pay nearly $1.5 billion in damages to the families of children killed in the Sandy Hook school shooting; his speculation that they were actors had led to a massive harassment campaign against them. At the trial, one father told the court that conspiracy theorists emboldened by Jones had claimed to have urinated on his 7-year-old son’s grave and threatened to dig up his body.

During his stand-up set, Rogan said that Jones was right about the existence of “false flags”—events staged by the government or provocateurs to discredit a cause. Then he whispered to himself that Jones had gotten “one thing wrong.” He had gotten a lot of things right too, Rogan said at normal volume. Then his voice dropped again: “It was a pretty big thing, though.”

Rogan’s sympathetic treatment of his friend demonstrates why power is better mediated through institutions than wielded by individuals: It’s too easy to be sympathetic to a man sitting in front of you, whom you know as a complete person, rather than to his distant, unseen victims. Also, it’s good to be open-minded, but not so much that your brain falls out.

If Rogan is the male Oprah, he is also the human embodiment of America’s vexed relationship with free speech: a complex tangle of arguments and conspiracy theories all boiled down into one short, swole man who likes to wear a fanny pack. Rogan is a guy who started a podcast in 2009 to smoke weed with his fellow comics and talk about martial arts—and who, like many Americans, has taken part in a great geographical sorting, moving to be closer to people whose values he shares. He speaks to people who feel silenced, both elite and normie, even as he’s turned the very idea that opinions like his are being “silenced” into a joke in itself. As I walked into the Comedy Mothership, I saw a sign on the wall. It read HECKLERS WILL BE ALIENATED.

This article appears in the October 2024 print edition with the headline “You Think You’re So Heterodox.”

It has been updated to reflect that Robert F. Kennedy Jr. suspended his 2024 presidential campaign after the issue went to press.

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boss323michalmiskovic · 3 months ago

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carriepatsalis · 4 months ago

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cathyjane · 6 months ago

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