#sad to learn just now its not that
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Encroached
#i always#Lways#say it and read it#as#enroached#like a bug#sad to learn just now its not that#sigh#my favorote weepy skin#next to u.mmmm#the space one#w ecosphere and space mining#weepy idv#weeping clown idv#joker idv#idv#i hate this drawing kn second thought#o well
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Get Their Ass.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#jin ling#jin chan#Yeah that's right. This guy is a named character. All those nameless disciples in the yi city arc and *this* guy gets a name.#Jin ling finally gets his much needed outfit upgrade! Rest in peace double straps.#I adore how we get to keep learning about Jin Ling and peeling back the layers on him...It's also so sad to see him so alone and friendless#especially knowing he really was starting to build peer friendships in the yi city arc...#Jin ling really is one of my top 5 characters in MDZS and its absolutely in part because of how you can *see* how he ended up this way#and we watch him learn and grow! He's doing what most adults refuse to do: Consider that his opinions are skewed and need to change.#You are NOT immune to propaganda and I adore characters who reflect and struggle with that!#Just because someone with assumed authority says something that fits into what you want to be true does not make it true B*/#In this series about rumours and warped perspectives - Jin Ling is a great example of how hard you have to work for the truth#+1 points of friendship with jin ling: He will self correct himself if he says a slur now
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human
#that clock ticks endlessly HE'S HUMAN HE IS GOING TO DIE!!!! GRIPPIGN MY HAIR!!!!! AUAUUUGHHHH!!!!!!#every second sleeping aging marching endlessly closer to death faster than all his closest people. weeping#i think im done riso-ing out right now i just wanted to do One More. looks away. id do more if i was better at it LOL its rly hard#the endless style versatility. silver will never look the same from picture to picture but they are all drawn by me#actually every single silver ever. even if someone else drew him just know i was in the room. i was there#hes so stinkin cute i cant stop looking at him. hes cute even when hes sad. my poor lil guy#first day of work was today and i did Literally Nothing bc i dont have a computer yet but i make 40 an hour so YIPPEEEEEEE#hopefully ill be able to learn it alright. i simply must. i also start apt hunting tmrw. wish me luck boys#twstファンアート#twst#twisted wonderland#twst silver#suntails
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wade, who can't control his anger and throws fits and shouts and probably has a meltdown that results in him being bedridden for days, nonverbal and pissy but logan still loves him and is still so patient with him, i love you ❤️
#over small things too#like something being moved because he had it in a spot he would remember to look for it and now its not there#he'll break things and scream and usually logans strong arms around him are enough to calm him but sometimes wade literally just cant handl#his emotions and doesnt know what to do with all the anger and sadness he feels#and during those times logan tends to him by bringing him water and food or drags the tv into the bedroom#will carry him to the bathroom to help him shower#wade wilson#deadpool#logan howlett#the wolverine#theyre also doing therapy together so things are getting better and theyre learning how to deal with these big feelings while supporting#eachother 💖
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No greater horror than going to reread one of your favourite fics only to realize it was fucking deleted.
BUT THEN YOU REMEMBER THAT YOU SAVED IT ALL A WHILE BACK AND FIND THE SAVED COPY
So now Im just staring at the fucking PDF file of the fic, absolutely flabbergasted and shocked. This is it. This is the only way I'll ever be able to read it now. Holy shit 😭
The author deleted their entire accout too, so I guess they just wanted to get rid of everything. Which, I mean, is fine, it is their work after all. They can do whatever they want with it.
BUT MAN, Im gonna be saving stuff all the time from now on.
#I have NEVER experienced this before#sure some fics I liked in the past got deleted and I was sad about it#but having a copy of it saved????#this is a whole new level of emotions#what the hell#you bet your ass Im gonna go and save SO MANY fics now after this#had to come here and rant cause Im feeling things rn#like Im so sad they deleted it but I have a copy so Im good??#but its still evoking this somberness???#idk man I wasn't expecting this#Im just gonna go read this smut fic now LMAO#ahhh but I just realized there was ANOTHER fic by this author I really liked... and I dont have it saved ☹#FUCK#really learning the hard way today#save your faves everybody!#you never know...#random post
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[<==PREV PAGES] [NEXT PAGE==>(not out yet.wait a year.or maybe more.imagine.]
saw alot of comments on prev pages; saying 'i HATE that mean teacher! im gonna FIGHT HIM!!' & i LOVE the energy!! it WOULD be nice. to have that catharsis. but the story of young tidestrider is Not one of catharsis. it is a story of being so small and so special and sucking so bad.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi riptide#gillion tidestrider#GONNA START FORMATTING MY COMICS BETTER. W THE PROPER 'PREV' 'NEXT' LINKS#REALLY DIDNT EXPECT TO CONTINUE THIS SERIES BUT AAAUUUHH MY BRRAAAIN MY BRAIN IS SO IDEASSS. I HAVE 3 OTHER PAGES SKETCHED OUT#NO PROMISES ILL FINISH EM ANY TIME SOON OR EVER. MY WHIMS ARE THEIR OWN BEAST AND I ONLY DRAW ON MY WHIMS#THAT BEING SAID IF U COMMISSIONED ME ILL GEEETT TO YOUUU IM SORRYYYY. ART IS AN EMOTIONAL RELEASE FOR ME N BABY I HAVE EMOTIONS.#ESPECIALLY ABOUT GILLION TIDESTRIDER CHAMPION OF THE UNDERSEA HERO OF THE DEEP.for the desc here i put smth that i typed up in the tags of#another thing i made. i gotta make a proper Baby Gillion tag or smth. eventually.. eventually...I LOVE DRAWIN THIS LIL BABY GUY..#i also LOVE depicting the teachers as just being so fuckin mean. ofc theres variation in that. just like in all things.like the teacher her#idk if itll be mentioned but the octo lady is named Ms Octburn.an octopus pun based off the name of an actual councilor i had#when i was in elementary school i got bullied alot but teachers never did anything. i hated adults and didnt trust them.#but this councilor o mine was so genuinely sweet. i remember spending alot of time w her. she doesnt work there anymore.#but that one school adult that actually earns ur trust and is there for you when they can be.its SO important for a child i think#i hope she knows how much she helped me.youll see in the next page that ms octburn isnt perfect either.but she tries. they all try.somehow.#ALL these comics are gonna be inspired by somesorta experience o mine in the school system. school is so fucked up u ever thing abt that#AND GILLIOOOOONNN IN THE MOST FUCKED UP LITTLE SCHOOL OF ALL. MAINTAINED BY A CULT. CENTERED AROUND HIM. OUR CHOSEN ONE#I IMAGINE ALOT BANKS ON HIS SUCCESS. THIS IS THE WORLD. THE WHOLE WORLD. THE PROPHECY IS GOING TO COME TRUE N UR TELLIN ME#THAT ITS THIS LITTLE IDIOT THATS GONNA BE SAVING US? WHAT IF HE FAILS. IF HE CANT GET THIS RIGHT THEN HE WILL FAIL AND WE WILL DIE#WE NEED TO TRAIN HIM. WE NEED HIM TO LEARN. AND TO SUCCEED. OR ELSE WE'RE DEAD. WE'RE ALL FUCKING DEAD. I IMAGINE THAT MUST BE STRESSFUL#in other news i hope ppl actually giggle when they read these. they ARE intended to be comical. dark humor or whatever. like its also sad#this is intended to be a sad comic series. but a funny one too. does that make sense? god i hope so.saw some1 say they had flashbacks-#-reading this. like YES!! THE INTENDED EFFECT!! YOU GET ME!! i love seeing ppl get upset on this lil baby boys behalf. i LOVE seeing ppl-#-wail n weep n cry in the comments. i LOOOVE seeing ppl RELATE to baby gillion. and i love letting u all know that this wont be a happycomi#gillion gets his happiness arc in the actual show. this series is one of unfortunate events. teehehehe. do u guys remember that show#i keep listening to the lil songs from A Series of Unfortunate Events for inspiration. GOOD STUFF!!#anyway uuhh uhh thats all i got in my brain. for now. feed me ur comments give me ur input i NNEEEEEDD THHEEEMMMM
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Worried by signs of aging but not in a "freakish capitalist beauty standard 85 step skincare routine obsession with youth" way, more of a "any marker of the passage of time reminds me that sadly I am not an immortal vampire so I need to rush around constantly and learn to prioritize because I will unfortunately not have 1000+ years to explore every single hobby and academic subject on planet earth (even though in a fair world i WOULD be able to do so)" way
#''but how could you keep going? how could you be immortal knowing everyone you love - everyone around you will perish#as the years go on whilst only YOU remain?? ToT'' because who cares. did you know I could master like 25 instruments? next question#^(not suprising coming from the person who regularly makes characters within the archetype of ''who needs other people when I#have my academic studies/craft/whatever they're focused on'' lol) <(and GENUINELY so!!!! NOT the obnoxious trope of ''i THINK that I#don't need other people and only care about my studies but then I meet a spunky group of adventurers/a love interest/etc and suddenly#am transformed into a romance loving extrovert and recognize i was wrong all along and probably just repressed or something because obviou#sly all human brains are the same and nobody can ever be born with any variance or deviation that genuinely reudces their social#capacity its always just that we're kinda sad :( but im in love now and am ''fixed'' as a person yipee hooray! i have learned#the moral lesson that i actually dont have to be so fixated on my work (god forbid i spend most of my time doing stuff i ENJOY) and#can 'let loose' a little and start spending the weekends with my lovely new group of frieinds'' .. NOT that trope lol.. my nerds are#NEVER ''''cured'''' of their hermit nerdness. I shall stand by that!!.. anyway lol)#I think I started wishing I was immortal at like.. 8 years old?? NOT some sort of boring technoimmortalilty where i'm in a computer body#or something - that's way too rife with issues I think. Good old classic mostly invincible never aging body vampire style immortality#I think because I enjoy the tactile nature of things and the process of learning. I like the pages on a book as I read. the clay in my hand#whilst I sculpt. Not just '*robot voice* yipeee. I have downloaded the Piano.Info file successfully to my brainscape and now am an expert#immediately. i shall use my 15 robot arms to clonk on my DigiKeyboard3000 now. huz-zah.''#Unless they build android bodies that are literally in all ways 100% indistinguishable from a human form and have full senses and where you#still have to learn skills from scratch and there are no technology companies involved whatsoever and capitalism doesn't exist anymore
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Actually speaking of the HoW library, if its a place for female trauma survivors to heal how come Rhysand didnt put Feyre in there when he got her out of the spring court? I guess its meant to be for victims of sexual assault which Feyre isnt (i mean she is, but Rhysand in acomaf is specifically saving her from her realtionship with Tamlin who sucks but never sexually assaulted her, and also neither he nor the narrative perceive it as such so who cares), but it seems rather cruel to turn someone whos suffering away from that kind of place just because they dont have the right kind of trauma. So how come she had to spend all this time with Rhysand and his friends (who have all barely managed to heal from their respective traumas in over 500 years) instead of spending it with all these other women who can understand her and teach her how to live with her trauma? Man its almost like he was taking advantage of her when she was incredibly vulnerable or something
#and yeah i know the library is just another retcon to make rhysand look better#but if you think about it inuniverse for a second it just adds another layer to how weird and bad the feysand relationship is#also now that Im thinking about it#its so weird how acotar was like 'in order to heal from trauma you need rest and peace and to rediscover the things that make you happy'#and now the acotar series from acowar onwards seems to be saying 'you need all the things i just mentioned in acotar#but also you need to learn how to fight'#which could have to do with the fact that those books focus a lot on SA-related trauma#so i guess the idea is 'you need to learn how to fight so you can be sure it doesnt happen again'#(which is a blatant misunderstanding of why women get SAd but whatever)#but then acomaf was randomly like 'if you dont out your traumatized gf in a saw trap she WILL kill herself and it will be your fault'#like what happened there#anti acotar#anti rhysand#anti feysand
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The Tommy/Buck break up came out of no where and makes no sense. Did they think we would celebrate or enjoy losing queer representation? Especially in such a cruel way! I don’t get it. It feels icky that for the first time Buck’s love interest doesn’t get closure is when it’s the queer man. Especially a man who has expressed feeling alone and isolated. This is by far the worst of Buck’s breakups and it means a queer character’s arc ends with isolation and heartbreak. What message are they really sending with this?
For me as a bi person it feels even more icky. “You’re gonna break my heart.” “I’m your first, but not your last.” These feel like illusions to the bi stereotypes that we are indecisive, cheaters, and greedy. Like Bobby married the first woman he dated after the death of his family. Athena married the first man she dated after getting out of a very long marriage. They didn’t need to ‘explore their options’, but Buck is Bi so that must mean he can’t just choose a person. He needs to demonstrate it, onto the hamster wheel we go.
I was so excited about a well done Bi character (they are few and far between) and Oliver Stark said they were doing it with care. This is not with care! This is horrible, and harmful, and it makes me so upset. This is literally the second time this week that a piece of media that was supposed to be safe (that I was excited about), became a source of shame and borderline biphobia. Along with the results of the election, I’m just so tired and heart broken.
I’m sure many Buddie shippers are going to be cheering on the downfall of queer representation in the name of getting what they want. The hate and vitriol they have spouted at a queer character and an actual real human being has just been rewarded. They were right Tommy Kinard was just a plot device, another in a long list of used and abused queer characters. It all just sucks so much and makes me want this week over that much faster. This was a cruel decision done without care for queer viewers.
#queer#lgbtq#tommy kinard#evan buckley#tevan#bucktommy#it always ends like this and we never learn#the anniversary of destial was a warning all its own#i’m so tired#i’m so sad#hate always seems to win#Oliver Stark wants Buck firmly squared in the slutty bisexual stereotype#I don’t know why I am always surprised by biphobia#you think I would learn#congratulations buddies#you killed a good relationship with amazing chemistry#we now have less queer representation#I’m sure you are all very proud#just not in the right way
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Never talk to me again why does it look like that =[ /neg /hj
#I'm sad now what the fuck is this. Maybe I'm just too nitpicky (I am) but...#As much as I want a plushie of Anya... This isn't something I would buy...#At least not without flipping it over on my shelf so only its back is visible...#I love Anya but I'm honestly better off learning how to sew and making a plushie of her on my own...
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i don't want to ruin this fun week of valentines + my eventual birthday but. been thinking about some things again and i just wanna let it out somewhere
#its safe to say that im pretty much a desensitized person towards media that can be difficult to look at. dark media if you will. horror#i in fact enjoy a lot of it. that's why I don't really mind looking at gore or blood or ig psychological/mentally draining topics#i really like understanding it. there's something really fun about finding art in something that disturbs#but what I don't like is when. people take that aspect of me and. kind of turn it around#idk its so hard to describe it but... it really made me upset#“you say you're desensitized to many things yet you breakdown so easily over an emotional matter”#something like that. that i was told before#that one really offended me. of course i will be sad when something so close to me is affected. i cried so bad when my first dog died#of course i will be absolutely shattered at that.#of course i will be sad knowing my friend isnt going to come visit me anymore because they're not in the same country as me anymore#of course i will miss things and people who mean so dearly to me. i am very adoring of people im close to#i love to love people who i like. i will be hurt if the people who love me upsetted me. its natural for me and im sure this applies to many#so me breaking down over something that means so much to me. even for someone like me who can handle shit like horror or. horrid shit -#is NOT the same thing. its not. horror is a media/theme psychological horror is a media/theme#being absolutely upset and heartbroken over something I care so much is not ... the aforementioned#i felt so. angry when they said that. i still think about it even if we've made up. i dont know. i cant help but dwell on it too much#i still think i'm mentally strong and capable towards handling difficult topics. but i am very much softhearted towards personal matters#im not too sure where im going with this. it's just. dont ever “weaponize”(?) something i'm capable of#i don't know if weaponize is the right word im just trying to find a descriptor#i mean. this is odd right? im not overthinking this am i?#that's all. i just want to put it somewhere#ive learned that bottling your internal conflicts excessively will do more damange than contro#its okay to control it. but not too much. too much that it's all you think of#and im spilling it for now so that i can have more room to bottle up for future pains
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my next painful warframe hurdle is building a voidrig, because i can't start the new war quest otherwise (┬┬﹏┬┬).
#warframe#idle gaming hours#idle chatter#grinding materials and then having to wait several days for the thing to finish before i can continue... sad#i like this game i prommy#i havent touched any of the faction stuff tbh#it hasnt been extremely necessary#and now i have to learn how fishing and mining works fr#its just also suupper clear that some of this stuff was specifically made in mind with long term players#likewise i got my ass handed to my by umbra last night because i had a squishy non-upgraded operator#i barely tickled that fuckers shields it was a struggle#wah
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every time i write touya i want to clutch my chest
#i just ACHE for him every time#i think its impossible for me to write him completely happy#bc even when he's happy idt he can feel completely happy#and thats just whats sad about it !!!!!!!!!!!#i think very much part of his healing is the fact that he has to learn to live in the feelings of the moment#but thats hard !!!! bc there's just so much shit to carry from the past !!!! and how it's shaped who he is now !!! AND JUST !!!#my GAWD#i talked so much again
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I know it’s haha funny to laugh at dutch and call it discount english or what-have-you, but I stopped finding it funny a long, long time ago. There’s so much active distaste for a language that has every right to exist and be found beautiful, but it’s hated by people who don’t speak it and native speakers who do. Why would you call any language lesser than? Any language better than another? There’s so much beauty to be found in each language, so many different ways of life and seeing the world, so many different words and sayings and ways to love that you can’t find in another. Dutch is no different, and it deserves to be appreciated, not driven into the ground and disregarded as a worn piece of clothing that’s served its purpose
#you don't even learn proper dutch in school anymore#listen I just#I'm so sad about this#I used to have this mindset of: english is better than dutch#why even learn dutch?#before I realized what an awful mindset this was#and I learned to appreciate my language and now I can see how much magic flows through it#how lyrical the sentences are#I've come to see how many sayings we have and how unique they are and how fun they are to use#Dutch deserves some appreciation#it deserves to have at least its native speakers' respect or love or at the very least fondness#I love dutch with all my heart and I wish I knew it better#I wish there was more literature and more media in it too#cap talks#dutch#dutchblr#flemish
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#so i just posted a “new” art on my twitter#not really new#i just havent posted it because of shadowban#its the gator art#i feel so good about that art bcs not only its my own character its also just reallll hot i love it so much#buti#i just lost 10 followers from posting it#its now sitting on 100 likes#literally everyone hates it#and now my confidence is just so low about it#this happens a lot for some reason#i like the art#people dont like it#and its sad bcs that one is a hit here and in bluesky and in FA#but for some reason on twitter its just#everybody just fucking hate it#if nobody interacts with it im like its fine that means shadowban or whatever#but losing followers?? over a drawing of a muscle fat gator??? that just fucking sucks#i fucking hate this place#i used to be good on playing with twitter but now im just so fucking bad at it#people say its because of algorithm but almost every artist thats good enough are able to post and always get a good reach#anyway i also just found out another EX-friend unfollowed me there as he reach 100k#he started learning to draw after me btw so....#this sucks
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i love college cuz as soon as i decide to do a 180 w my major i do cs and physics classes and im like 'mmm i wish i could major in math'
#the thing is i really just want to keep taking these math-based classes without consequences i would love that so much actually#because taking these physics and cs classes makes me realize how much i lOOOOOVE computation i love it so much#its just the way math works in college is soooo shit its so sad#and i know im enjoying physics now but i fi majored in it it would get so much worse for me#same w cs#i want to dedicate my life to learning math and cs and physics AND writing without consequences of doing so you know :/#i wish i could have a free education that never had impacts on my grades and career choices#maybe in the future when i have a stable job and can take classes on the side i can continue w learning math and stuff#its just so dififcult as a major and i know if i continued with it as a major i would be muchhhh worse off#but i love computation so much like i love reading but the computaation part is so fun i love doing it#sunny rambles
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