#rwby iceknight

[arc-misadventures]

The Lady’s Next Door

The 'Milf next door' when she says she just going to say 'hi' to that cute blond boy your daughters friends with.

Kali

Kali: I just want to talk to him.

Blake: Why do you want to do that, Mom?

Kali: I just want to talk to him.

Blake: Why are you dressed like that?

Kali: I just want to talk to him.

Blake: Why do you want to talk to, Jaune?

Kali: I just want to talk to him.

Blake: Is it because he's a human?

Kali: I just want to talk to him.

Blake: He’s just my friend, Mom, he is not another, Adam waiting to happen.

Kali: I just want to talk to him.

Jaune: Hi, Blake. Oh, hi Ms. Belladonna!

Kali: I just want to fuck him.

Jaune: Beg pardon?

Blake: What?!

~~~

Raven

Yang: Hey, Mom, I’m sorry, but can you do me a favour?

Raven: I don’t wanna.

Yang: Mom! Come on! I just need you to watch over my friend till I get back.

Raven: Back, back from where?

Yang: Blake got…?!

Raven: No! Say no more, since it involves your ‘girlfriend’ I can assume it’s something illegal.

Yang: She’s not my girlfriend!

Raven: But, was it illegal?

Yang: …

Yang: Well…

Raven: Ha! Love the bad girls don’t you? Fine, I’ll watch over your friend. Who is it you want me to babysit; It better not be the, Schnee girl! I swear I’ll shoot her one of these days if she…?

Yang: No, it’s not, Weiss. It’s, Jaune. Jaune’s coming over.

Raven: J-Jaune…?

Yang: Yeah, we’ve got a school project we’re working on together, and Jaune wanted to get ahead of the game. So he asked if he could come over here so we could work on it. Is that okay?

Raven: Jaune coming over here…? T-That’s fine! I’m totally fine with that tasty snack…?! I mean! That fine young man coming over here. W-When is coming over…?

Yang: In… half an hour-ish?

Raven: Half an hour? That gives me plenty of time… Time for a shower, and time to put on something spicy~!

Yang: What was that?

Raven: Nothing! Go, and save your girlfriend!

Yang: She’s not my girlfriend, Mom!

Raven: And, I’m not about to get laid, now get going!

Yang: Alright! Alright! I’m going.

Yang: …

Yang: Wait, ‘Get laid?’

~~~

Summer

Ruby: Mom?

Summer: Yes, sweaty~?

Ruby: What are you wearing?

Summer: A bikini.

Ruby: Why?

Summer: Well, your friend, Jaune is coming over to help clean the pool, so I thought I’d give him a show~!

Ruby: A what?

Summer: I thought I’d get a suntan.

Ruby: Oh… Then why are you taking the sunscreen?

Summer: So I don’t get sunburned silly.

Ruby: Okay, do you want me to…?!

Summer: No! No, noo, no. I’ll ask, Jaune to put it on~! That way I get those big muscular hands all over me, feeling me up~! Oh gods~!

Ruby: What was that mom?

Summer: Nothing~!

(Ding dong~!)

Summer: Oh? That must be my boy toy~! Coming!

Ruby: Boy what…?

~~~

Willow

Jacques: Willow! Where are you! Blasted, where is that drunkard!

Willow: …

Jaune: …

Willow: Well, that was close…

Jaune: Yeah… too close.

Willow: Jacques would have thrown an absolute fit if he caught one of, Weiss’s friends snooping about the mansion.

Jaune: I wasn’t snooping, I was lost.

Willow: In a supply closet?

Jaune: I thought it was, Weiss’s room.

Willow: Not even close dear.

Jaune: Okay… but can you open the door, you shoved us in here to get away from, Jacques, and this broom closet is rather cramped.

Willow: No can do… my hands are stuck here… Feeling your broad chest~! Y-You’ll have to open the door yourself.

Jaune: Okay fine… where is the door knob…? Eh? What is this, a pillo…?!

Willow: Ohh~!

Jaune: Ahh?! S-S-S-Sorry! I didn’t mean to…?!

Willow: Jaune?

Jaune: Y-Y-Yeah…?!

Willow: Harder~!

(Ziiiip!)

~~~

Athena

Athena: So tell me, why are you in such a panic to clean up, our already clean house?

Pyrrha: Ooooh… My teammates are coming over, so I wanted to spruce the place up for their visit.

Athena: Your teammates…? Does that mean… Jaune is coming too…?

Pyrrha: Yeah, he’s coming too.

Athena: I see… Well, then I hope he’ll enjoy visiting us in our humble abode~!

Pyrrha: Uhh… Mom? Your top has come undone.

Athena: It’s a little hot here, I just want to cool off.

Pyrrha: It’s not hot in here at all?

Athena: Oh~? What makes you think that?

Pyrrha: Mom, your top has come undone again.

Athena: So it has.

Pyrrha: Mom, I can see you bra.

Athena: And?

Pyrrha: Mom, do up your blouse, unless you want my friends to stare at your breasts.

Athena: So long as it’s him, I don’t mind if he stares, or even copes a feel. I’ll be very happy by the end of it all~!

Pyrrha: C-Cope a feel? Who are you talking about?

~~~

Carla

Carla: So that’s the, ‘loser twerp’ you’ve been bullying?

Cardin: Yeah, his name is, Jaune Arc, complete loser.

Carla: Jaune Arc…? Jaune ArrrrrrrrrC~! Hmm… Rolls off the tongue.

Cardin: Pff! That’s part of the idiot’s stupid catch phrase.

Carla: What catch phrase?

Cardin: “The nAme’S JaUNe ArC; roLLLs of tHE tonGUE! LaDIEs Love it” Pff! How stupid can you be?

Carla: ‘Love’s it?’ So, he is the boy you are being forced to apologize to?

Cardin: Yeah, the teacher says they’ll end my two month long detention early if I apologize to him… I have no intention of apologizing to that loser.

Carla: I see… You know what, Cardin. How about I apologize on your behalf?

Cardin: You’ll do that?

Carla: Of course! He may not accept it, but he’ll at least get that apology he is owed.

Cardin: You’ll do that? Thanks, Mom. I probably would have decked him in the face if I went over there to apologize to the loser.

Carla: Then I best go over there. Don’t worry sweetie, I’ll make sure he accepts your apology. After all, what better apology can a boy get than fucking his bully’s own mother~?

Cardin: W-What was that…?

~~~

Ruby

Ruby: Amethyst, honey? Why are you dressed so… slutty?

Amethyst: Oh… uhh… Parent teacher conference is tonight…

Ruby: I’m aware…

Amethyst: Yeah… so… Professor Arc is coming over to…?!

Ruby: Jaune?! J-Jaune’s coming over here?

Amethyst: Yeah, he told me so himself.

Ruby: So, you’re dressing like a slut to seduce him?

Amethyst: Yeah… That is the plan…

Ruby: Nonono! That won’t work at all honey! He won’t give you so much as a fleeting glance if you dress up like some common harlot!

Amethyst: He won’t?

Ruby: No! You need to dress in something more conservative, something that shows nothing, but something that emphasizes everything~!

Amethyst: Like what?

Ruby: I’ll show you after I’ve seduce him~!

Amethyst: What?! But, I want to sleep with him first!

[arc-misadventures]

BMI Jaune: Willow, Summer, and Kali?

BMI: Jaune II

Juniper: Jaune~!

Jaune: No...

Juniper: What?

Jaune: No. Whatever it is, the answer is: No.

Juniper: But, I never said anything?

Jaune: But, you're going to ask me something, and whatever the ask is about, the answer is: No.

Juniper: ...

Juniper: BMI...

Jaune: AHHHH?! Not this shit again!

Juniper: Your chose for this BMI, are Willow Schnee.

Willow: Hello, Jaune~!

Jaune: Hi...?

Juniper: Kali Belladonna.

Kali: Oh look, it's my favourite human~!

Jaune: Why did you say it like that...?

Juniper: And, lastly we have, Summer Rose.

Summer: Hello, Daddy~!

Jaune: Excuse me, what...?

Juniper: Are you ready to choose who you going to, BMI, Jaune~?

Jaune: The hell are you making me choose between my friend’s mom?!

Juniper: Well, as one woman/mother to another, they told me about their... pitiful sex lives, or lack there of in some cases...

Summer: Juniper?!

Kali: How could you just say that?!

Willow: Considering my ex-husband size or, more accurately the lack there of... Honestly, there isn't much to brag about. There is certainly plenty to complain about however…

Juniper: What? Both of your husbands are dead, so you haven't had much, if any action since they died.

Kalli: Well, that's true...

Summer: It's not like we did it much after I had, Ruby...

Juniper: And, Willow... I'm sorry you had to go through that so often...

Willow: While, I love my children with all my heart, and I wouldn't trade them for the world. I do sometimes find myself wishing I had my son sooner so I didn't have to have... relations as often as I did.

Juniper: See! They have sad sexless lives since they lost their husbands. And, Willow had...

Juniper: She had, Jacques...

Juniper: So, Jaune please, BMI these three woman, and help them ‘fix’ their dry spell?

Jaune: ...

SKW: Please~?

Jaune: ...

Jaune: Haaaa...

Jaune: I would Marry, Summer.

Summer: And, why do you want to do that, Husband Dearest~?

Jaune: 'Husband dearest?"

Jaune: Okay? Okay, I say that because you look like you would be a wonderful housewife to come home to.

Summer: Naww~!

Jaune: Plus you look like the woman/wife who would do the, "Hi honey, welcome home! Would like a bath, dinner, or me?" Type of woman, and I...? Ahem... yeah that...

Summer: Oh; Is that so~?

Jaune: ...

Jaune: I Would, Breed Kali.

Kali: Why?

Jaune: Well... You have large birthing hips... and I want to give those birthing hips a run for their money...

Kali: Oh, I hope feel like we're going to enjoy that~!

Jaune: Hahaha...

Jaune: I would impregnate, Willow.

Willow: Oh, why would you do that?

Jaune: ...

Jaune: I hate you ex-husband with a burning passion. A lot of people think that killing him, or torturing him to death would be the best sort of revenge for what he did. But, I think... taking his woman, and making her mine is a much more tantalizing idea~!

Willow: Y-Yours?

Jaune: I’ll make you my woman! By the time I’m through with you, you’ll fit around me perfectly, no other man will satisfy you, you’ll come begging for more, and I’ll be all to happy to oblige~!

Willow: Y-Y-You promise…?

Jaune: Uhh… Well… T-That is of we… did do it…

Summer: Do you think he could do that?

Kali: Maybe? My daughter did say he’s quite big.

Willow: How big?

Kali: Six when soft, ten when hard, and plenty thick as well~!

Willow: Heavens, say it is so~!

Summer: Are you really that big~?

Jaune: WHAT?! How the hell do you know that?!

Willow: He is~!

Summer: Hmm… Juniper, please be a dear, and leave.

Juniper: Why?

Summer: Because, the sooner you leave, the sooner you’ll have grandchildren~!

Juniper: Good luck, Jaune! Remember to not use a condom!

Jaune: W-W-What?! Wait… hold on!

Kali: Don run, Jaune: The fun is about to begin~!

Willow: Come on, Jaune… it’s time to continue the, Arc bloodline~!

Summer: So what will it be, Jaune; Will you take, Kali, or do you want, Willow, or perhaps me~?

Jaune: Ohhh…?!

Jaune: P-Please be gentle…?

SKW: Fu-fufu~!

Kali: No promises~!

[arc-misadventures]

The High Elf’s Tale

Lady Willow Schnee…

She was a high elf that had lived to be nigh on a thousand year. She was a mother of three wonderful children, two girls, and a boy. And, she was unfortunate married to a repulsive, slime ball of a high elf.

It was a forced marriage her parents put her through; something about keeping the bloodline pure. They said this as if it was something sacred, and special to uphold in high regard. Yet keeping the bloodline pure often lead to a unsanitary deal of inbreeding, and the various noble bloodlines of the human nations had taught anyone who had eyes to see the vile, and various consequences of inbreeding.

Luckily for, Willow this animated corpse was only her second cousin. Though the thought of having married that decrepit spawn of goblin dung never sat well with her.

To escape her ‘loving’ husband, Willow eventually fell into drinking: Elvin Wine, Dwarf Ale, Faunkin Brandy, even the feeble excuse of alcohol that was, Human Beer. For nearly a hundred years she drunk herself into a stupor. If it wasn’t for her daughter’s, she dare say she’d still be a drunkard.

After recovering from her addiction of the bottle, she escape that sentient trash heap of a living being, and became a scholar at the kingdom’s national library, one of the largest repository of knowledge in the know world.

Willow spent her time there delving into ancient knowledge, magic, and history of the world. Nearly two hundred years had passed since she had arrived there, and she had swiftly became a premier scholar, having read the majority of the library’s vast collection of tomes, history books, fine literature, and grimoires. And, thus becoming a wizard of great renown throughout the kingdom.

Willow had thought she would live a peaceful life studying her books for the rest of her life. But, all of that changed on the day that during her studies she stumbled upon the most curious sight: A human knight scoping about the library.

A curious sight to behold; human scholars were a rare, but not uncommon sight to be seen perusing about the vast elven libraries. But, a human knight in their library was something else entirely. So, she grew curious, Willow said she had developed an inquisitive side to her, no doubt due to all the books she read. So, with her curiosity peaked she decided to say hello to this human knight, and ask him why he was here.

Little did, Willow know that simply saying hello to this human lead her down a rabbit hole that seemingly had no end.

Who would believe that just by saying hello to a human knight named, Jaune Arc would result in her assisting him in his quest to slay a dragon, and to battling hordes of bandits, slavers, and all other of vile barbarians just to back a dragon-stone to her kingdom.

Nor, would it have lead them to discovering a vile, and treacherous secret plot being made by her, bastard son of a whore husband’s to overthrow the reigning monarchy in an attempt to take over the kingdom.

Who could have foreseen her shit flinger of a husband was merely being used by a cult that has used the dragon-stone they had acquired for an vile arcane ritual that was being used to summon a, Demon-Lord in an attempt to destroy the kingdom.

Willow, would never had thought she would wind up in a book in the very same library she stood over of as a member in a tale of hero’s who would fight along side, the Knight of the Rusted Order, Jaune Arc, and his companions to slay a, Demon-Lord, and save the entire kingdom.

Willow would have never had expected that after all the travels, and adventures that she would wake up in the arms of this young knight after the victory celebrations. And, considering how loveless her marriage was, and dull, and repulsive the times they spent in bed together, she could have never foreseen how enjoyable, and overwhelming pleasurable it was to sleep with a man she genuinely loved.

In all of, Willow’s life she had never expected to fall in love with a man, a human no less. Let alone marry a human knight that was a thousandth her age, and least of all bear several wonderful, beautiful children with him.

But, that just how life goes; unpredictable, but unforgettable, and wonderful nonetheless.