#rwby general ironwood

[kev-dee]

So I had an idea to read General Ironwood's Ultimatum as Mickey Mouse. I am so sorry.

[ironwoodatl01]

Weiss Schnee is pregnant.

"Father!" Weiss said as she placed her tea cup on the table, and in her agitated state spilled a drop of the Earl onto the white tablecloth.

"Father," Weiss said again as she pushed her chair back, "I cannot, in good conscience, marry Master Marigold." Jacques Schnee placed his tea onto the table and spilled two drops across the table like blood on laced snow before he could muster the strength to say.

"And why ever can you not marry Master Marigold?!"

"Because I am carrying his child, Father!"

Beside Jacques Weiss's sister, Winter Schnee, allowed a silent ruby tear to escape her iron self-control down her porcelain cheek as Weiss demurely sat on General Ironwood's broad lap.

"General!" Jacques said, "what have you to say for yourself?!"

General Ironwood quietly wrapped his hand around Weiss's and said.

"Jacques, I will cherish your daughter as if I have known her for all of five minutes."

[itsupermanti]

A month later;

Ironwood(eyes wide at the small bump on Penny’s stomach): HOW?!?!?!

Jaune(completely disheveled as Penny happily hugs his arm with a smile): Apparently she asked Pietro for an artificial womb.

Ironwood: …

Jaune(deadpanning at the General): You didn’t know, did you?

Ironwood(grabbing his head): FU-

Who the hell wrote this?!

At the biweekly Huntsmen and Huntress atlas staff meeting.

Ironwood: Thank you very much, Dr Smith, for that talk on personal hygiene. Now our next point, Jaune Arc would like to talk to all of you about a situation regarding the suggestion box.

Ironwood leaves the podium and Jaune takes his place.

Jaune: Thank you sir. *ahem* Ok, I checked the suggestion box I put out a week ago, and I have a question for you all. Who the hell wrote "I want to be impregnated by our cute Knight, Jaune Arc"?! *He says angrily*

~Silence~

Jaune: Okay?! Anyone?!

Ruby: *She stands up and starts clapping*

*Clap Clap Clap Clap*

Jaune: *Confuse* What are you doing?

Yang: *She also stands up and starts clapping*

*Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap!*

Jaune: Hey, this is serious. Stop it!

Weiss, Blake and Winter follow them and start clapping

*Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!Clap!*

Jaune: Stop! This is not a game!

Ignoring what he says, more people start to get up and clap.

*CLAP!CLAP!CLAP!CLAP!CLAP!CLAP!CLAP!CLAP!*

Jaune: What the fuck?! Is this a standing ovation?!

Their applause becomes louder

CLAP!CLAP!CLAP!CLAP!CLAP!CLAP!CLAP!CLAP!

Jaune: STOP!!!

[brokentrafficknight]

Was sitting on this one and only just remembered I had a genderbent Ironwood!

[rwby-encrusted-blog]

Ironwood: ALRIGHT MEN! ALIENS ARE REAL! First; We must treat them with respect from a distance; Secondly! We must wait for our scientists to collaborate until we can determine the physical compatibility of our immune systems and Microorganic beings! Which means now handholding, no hugging, no Kissing and no Sexual intercourse!

Jaune: QUESTION, SIR!

Ironwood: Yes Private!

Jaune: I HAVE HAD SEX WITH AN EXTRATERRESTRIAL!

Ironwood: You WHAT!

Jaune: I Have done nothing but Fuck an Alien for the past three days!

The Squad: ...

Qrow: ... What was it like?

Jaune: You really Don't know?

Qrow: *Also definitely fucked an alien* ... No.

[howi99]

Prince of Vale 7

Meeting room

Jaune: *looking at the leaders of every major nation* Messieurs, leaders of Vacuo, Atlas, Mistral and Menagerie, i welcome you. *Bow in sign of respect to his guest*

All of the representatives: *bow to the king, showing their respect*

Jaune: *taking a seat* As all of you must know, i have summoned all of you to discuss two major incidents. The first and least important one being the demands of Jacques Schnee, demanding the day of my mother's funeral, the queen funeral, that i take one of his daughters as queen consort. The second and far more grave incident was the Prime Minister of Mistral accusing me of protecting the princess of Menagerie from the Mistralean judicial system.

Ghira: *looking directly at said Prime Minister* Is that so?

PM: *adjusting his tie* With all due respect, your daughter did participate in White Fang's activities. Both of your nations may not see them as a terrorist organization, but the material damage they are causing in the name of liberty cannot be disregarded.

Jacques: *a calculating look in his eyes* And should i remind you, your majesty, that said material was the property of the Schnee Dust Company? Not only that, but my daughter was placed in the same team as said criminal?

Jaune: *coldly looking at Jacques* First, may i remind you that you are only the manager of said company and not its true owner? *Looking at Willow* Your wife is the one allowed to speak without constraints during the meeting. And secondly, you shall address her by her title or miss Belladonna.

Willow: *surprised* Your majesty?

Jacques: ... *Sigh* I must ask your forgiveness. It slipped my mind.

Jaune: I see. *Now looking at the PM* Now, as you probably know, Miss Belladonna isn't part of the White Fang anymore. Not only that, but her crimes were committed as a minor. Furthermore, she isn't a Mistralean resident, meaning we are in no obligation to extradite her.

PM: *frowning* You are saying that she won't be punished for her crimes?

Jaune: *shaking his head* I never said that. She will be judged according to Valean laws.

Ghira: *nodding* And i approve of this decision. Tell me, wouldn't you prefer we bury the hatchet and try de-escalating the situation?

PM: ... *Sigh* What would be the sentence?

Jaune: Under our laws, she committed vandalism, vigilantism and endangerment of civilian life during said vigilantism. For the remainder of her time in Beacon, she will have to do community service every Saturday. Furthermore, she will be forbidden from leaving the vicinity of Beacon UNLESS it is for said service.

PM: ... Fine, we shall accept those conditions. *Looking at Ghira* In exchange, we simply ask for the White Fang to stop attacking the SDC shipments to our cities.

Ghira: *sigh* I would love to, but i have limited influence on them i'm afraid.

Jaune: *looking at the annoyed Jacques* Maybe the SDC could make some concessions? *Smiling, now looking at Willow* What do you think, lady Willow?

Willow: *nervous* I-i... My husband...

Jaune: *gently cutting her* Has no authority during this meeting.

Willow: *Feeling the gaze of her husband* I... *Shaky voice* Y-yes your majesty. The company has gone too far.

Jacques: *low angry voice* Willow...

Willow: *looking at Jaune with more resolve* I am fully aware of the wrongdoing of Jacques. In exchange for those concessions, however, i want the rights of the SDC's old mines back.

Jaune: *pensive* The one from before the faunus war, i assume?

Willow: *nod* Yes, your majesty... I will be frank with you, Jacques demands were mostly aimed at re-appropriating them back.

Jaune: *sigh* It would have been so much easier to say so... *Nod* You are free to restart mining on Valean soil. However, some of the mines were privatised. Is this fine with you, my lady?

Willow: *nod* I was already aware of that. Besides, competition never hurts.

Ironwood: *surprised, whispering to Winter* It's the first time i've seen her speak up.

Winter: *as surprised as him* Same for me here. I always thought she was completely under my father's thumb...

Jacques: *furious, getting up from his chair* Willow, what are you doing!? "I" own the company! "I" brought it back from the mountain of debts your father had to pay!

Willow: *looking at him* And in doing so, you ran my family name through the mud. *Getting up, locking eyes with him* You made us enemy number one of faunuskind, you supplied both the government and the criminals alike in the name of profit and that's enough! I'm through with this!

Jacques: What are you-

Willow: I'm divorcing you, you twat!

The Vacuan representative: *whispering to Jaune* Soooo.... Would it be a bad time to talk about the unlawful exploitation of our Dust by the SDC or?

[tumblingxelian]

OK I am just gonna say it.

In regards to the whole "The writers said Ironwood sacraficing his arm means he is giving up his humanity" thing?

I think that they are 100% talking from Ironwood's perspective there.

Now hear me out.

Ironwood is one of the people who most dehumanizes Penny. Yeah sure he's superficially 'nice' when everything is going his way. Be he explicitly had her made as a weapon and the moment its more convenient to treat her as a tool than a person he does so.

Ironwood is fucking weird about his prosthetics. He is always trying to hide them until they are too bulky to cover up with clothing. He's clearly deeply uncomfortable with them and defaults to blaming them for his own behavior.

Compare & contrast to other characters. All of the heroic characters constantly emphasize Penny's personhood and even when disagreeing with her never start couching their language in commands but convincing arguments as they would anyone else.

What's more, Yang, Maria, Fox, Pietro & hell even Tyrian all wear their prosthetics or disabilities very openly and without shame. The shows framing, theme & narrative do not present these things as some kind of loss of humanity or otherwise as a negative. If "Prosthetics eat your soul" was a thing the writers actually felt, it would be more obvious.

Note: I am unsure whether the writers regard Penny as disabled, so I didn't put her with the others.

Penny's new body. Much for much-ness is made about Penny "Becoming a real girl" as though the show hadn't consistently treated her as one from her first moment on screen. & while ignoring the fact that her new body was clearly a magical/Aura construct given it was made up of wobbly green energies under a scan not flesh and bone like other characters.

Even if we ignore all that, when it comes to her new body and that whole angle, while she did show an appreciation for her new tactile senses, she was also shown to be far more vulnerable & generally to be struggling with the new body & it ultimately led to her fall.

This is very much not on brand if we were meant to regard her mechanical form as some kind of problem outside of how others used it to mistreat her.

One of Atlas's core themes' is dehumanization. The people pf Mantle are dehumanized into a faceless mob, a few city blocks that can easily be crushed beneath Ironwood's heel.

Cinder Fall was "adopted" into child slavery where the rights of her abusers to own and harm her always took precedence over her humanity.

The Ace-Ops are trained to regard themselves, their fellows & everyone else as inherently expendable. Cogs in a machine that can be replaced and should not be cared for or mourned.

& most integrally, when Ironwood sacrificed his arm so he could beat Watts. When he had Watts dangling over a lava pit & said he would sacrifice anything to beat Salem. Watts smirked. Because Watt's knew Ironwood's penchant to view harming himself or others as "Ruthlessness" and thus pragmatism was alive & well & would destroy him. Which it did.

The 'other' statement. There is one other line people point to, namely Yang's V8 line, regarding "The mechanical bits are just extra" as somehow ableist. Even ignoring as I said before that I am unsure CRWBY even regard Penny as disabled, or as equivalent to a person using prosthetics. The fact is, I can only view taking that statement as dehumanizing Penny by virtue of her mechanical nature as at best, misinterpreting Yang's statement.

Seriously, they are talking about the fact Penny will still have a soul. IE the very metric of personhood that's used to define every person in universe! It'd be no different if she was made of clay or cloned flesh.

Conclusion. As I said above, if the writers really felt that way about prosthetics, it would be much more overt than one off hand statement that very much seems to reflect Ironwood's thinking not the writers. Ironwood thinks giving up his arm and replacing them with prosthetics is something that makes him less human, a trait he explicitly admired in/projected onto Salem. It makes so much more sense for the writers to be commenting on Ironwood';'s thought process here given it thematically does not align with the rest of the show at all otherwise.

[lord-of-rain]

Ironwood: And that concludes the situation update. Any questions?

Ruby: *raises her hand*

Ironwood: I swear to the fucking brothers. If you suggest that you and Arc make more silver-eyed warriors again, I will shoot you.

Ruby: *lowers her hand*

[rnlacc]

The artificer and his *bird*.

RWBY RPG collab that I took part in.

[but-a-humble-goon]

Some Atlas techie was like “this arm’s supposed to be for civilian use right? You said she was a student? Is the gun really necessary?” and presumably Ironwood who’s been looming over his shoulder ruthlessly monitoring his progress the whole time was like “I’ve known Yang Xiao Long for five minutes give or take so I can say with absolute confidence that she’s going to want a gun in this thing.”

[notmaplemable]

Ironwood: The previous grimm attack was devastating, but as long as the spirit of Atlas remains, we shall fight on.

Winter: General, the caffeine reserves were destroyed.

Ironwood: Then all is lost.

[ironwoodatl01]

Now there are two of them!

"General," Amonico Glass said as he leaned forward and placed his corpulent elbows on the table, "the Audit you are asking for is inconceivable. The overtime alone I would have to authorize would be downright criminal! What you want from my company is out of the board's range!"

Through the holoimage, General James Ironwood leaned back in his chair and said.

"Not ... for a Schnee."

Two figures flickered into view behind Ironwood. Behind Ironwood Weiss Schnee, dressed in a white blouse with its sleeves rolled up her forearms and buttons loose at her throat and chest, placed a hand on Ironwood's left shoulder and struck Amonico a glare over her thin, wire-rimmed glasses.

Whitley Schnee, his plain white business suit making the young man sharper than his age would imply, hovered by Ironwood's right shoulder and stared sharply at his older sister's intimacy with Ironwood while Ironwood said.

"May I present my auditors, Weiss and Whitley Schnee, they will audit your firm's sheets."

The holoimage then faded out and shut off.

Across from Amonico, Bram Thornmane smashed a white-gloved fist onto the table and said.

"This is getting out of hand! Now there are two of them!"

Amonico sighed and fell back against his chair, he then took off his glasses and polished them before he said.

"Jacques should not have agreed to that arrangement."

[iamafanofcartoons]

Remember how people claimed that team rwby had no plan, that ironwood was the real hero, and that ruby somehow had a messiah complex?

The Finale of V9 basically showed every Ironwood Simp that Ruby’s plan worked!

Team RWBY made the right call, and Ironwood failed.

Somebody pick up that phone, because I FUCKING CALLED IT!

@instantbee thanks for the screenshot!

#GREENLIGHTVOLUME10 

[brokentrafficknight]

His goals are surely beyond our comprehension!

The General Ironwood Fitness Challenge

[rwby-encrusted-blog]

Continued from here

Ironwood: Pietro! How has your automatons Come along?

Pietro: *In a tracked, Steam-powered Wheel Chair* Fairly Well ...

Ironwood: What was that Pause for?

Pietro: ... Penny May have ran off.

Ironwood: *In Confusion and Anger* What.

Pietro: Well, My darling heard that the Princess Weiss Schnee hadn't arrived at Vale, she decided to go save her, like Knights in the stories I read to her.

Ironwood: ...

Pietro: She'll be fine! Mostly! Uh, some components were still in need of updating for their designs, but she can still move and fight!

Ironwood: ...

Ironwood: *In Utter befuddlement* What.

~~~~~

Jaune: *Moves a rook from f1 to e5*

Weiss: ...

Weiss: *Places her king on its side*

Jaune: Ha-Ha! *Rotates board so Weiss has the white pieces now*

Weiss: Hmph!

*Distance sound of chuffing*

Weiss: ... ?

Jaune: ?

*Chuffing grows Closer*

Jaune: ! *Draws Sword and Shield*

A Knight in Shining armor bursts through the door of the holding cell, Slitted visor lowered, with a long green feather poking out the top of the helmet

Knight: *Excited Steam Whistle, points at self*

Knight: *Certain Steam Whistle, Points at Weiss*

Jaune: ?

Weiss: *Shrug*

Jaune: *Fully readies for a fight*

Knight: *Unleashes floating swords*

Weiss: Halt!

Jaune: *Holds Still*

Knight: *Holds Still*

Weiss: Penny?

Penny: *Raises Visor, Whistles Happily*

Weiss: Er ist ein Freund! (He's a Friend!)

Penny: *Tilts head, Whistles Questioningly*

Weiss: *Gestures to chess board* Freund! (Friend!)

Penny: *Contemplative Whistle*

Penny: *Shocked Whistle*

Penny: *Excited Whistle, Holds arms out for hug*

Jaune: ?!?!?

Weiss: Jaune!

Jaune: ?

Weiss: *Hugs herself, points at Penny*

Jaune: ...

Jaune: *Walks to and hugs Penny*

Penny: *Hugs Jaune, whistling LOUDY*

Jaune: *Crushed by hug*

Weiss: Penny? Warum kannst du nicht sprechen?

Penny: *sets Jaune down*

Jaune: *Wheeze*

Penny: *Takes helmet off, revealing an exposed neck full of hoses, wires, and rods*

Penny: *Whistle!*

Weiss: Warum bist du gekommen? Ihr seid nicht zusammen! (Why did you come? You're not together!)

Penny: *Hands Weiss a picture*

It's a crudely drawn picture of Penny and Weiss holding hands. It clearly has Romantic Subtext.

Weiss: ... Danke. (Thank you.)

Penny: ... *Whistle?*

Weiss: Myrtenaster?

Penny: *Sad, apologetic whistle*

Jaune: ...

Penny: *Whistle!*

Penny: *Draws a picture*

Its an okay picture of Weiss' rapier

Jaune: !

Jaune: Pouvez-vous me comprendre? (Can you understand me?)

Penny: *Affirmative Whistle*

Jaune: L'épée est par là ! Veuillez suivre! (The Sword is this way! Please Follow!)

Penny: *Affirmative Whistle*

They Leave

Weiss: ...

Weiss: *Pushes door*

The Door opens without much resistance

Weiss: ...

Weiss: Konnte ich die Haltezeit wirklich einfach verlassen haben?Willst du mich veräppeln? (Could I have really just left the hold time?!? Are you Fucking Kidding me?!?)

[lwde-encrusted-sideblog]

Jaune: I can't believe I'm gonna have sex on the desk of the Atlesian General.

Penny: It's somewhat Exhilarating, yes? So long as we ensure to disinfect the area, we should not be caught! I will access the Cameras so we are not seen, and the door will remain locked until we leave!

~Later~

Ironwood: *Looking around suspiciously*

Ironwood: ... Someone Fucked in here. No alcohol, so it wasn't Qrow ... No Perfume, so it wasn't Winter ... The Ace-ops were out on a mission, so none of them could've done it ... Robyn wouldn't have bothered to clean up.

Ironwood: So who had sex in my office?