#ron third wheeling all the time

[daddiesdrarryy]

Pansy: Okay, game time, we’ll go around the room and introduce yourself. Hermione, you go first

Hermione: All right, my name is Hermione, I’m a Muggleborn

Pansy: Yeah, yeah, great name! So are you into girls or guys?

Hermione: Well, I’m into everyone

Pansy: That’s lovely, yeah, very nice

Ron: I’m Ron—

Pansy: Shhh, Ron, it’s not your turn yet. So, are you free this Friday, Hermione? Can I take you out on a date?

Hermione: Oh! Yeah, sure, I’d love to!

Ron: My name’s Ron—

Pansy: Ron, still not your turn. Hermione, should I pick you up then, say...7pm?

Hermione: Seven is good

Pansy: Great! It’s a date then!

Ron: Okay, so is my turn gonna come any time soon or do you two have to get married first?

Pansy: Ron, shush, so Hermione—

Ron: Oh for Merlin’s sake!

[getawayfox]

My favorite reclist of the year! It’s the best excuse to reread beloved fics and shout about them again. I couldn’t wait any longer to post it, so, without further ado: here are my personal favorites from 2023 and why I love them, along with a banner I’m really pleased with. 

Thank you, sweet writers, for giving us your wonderful stories. Wishing everyone a happy December and an amazing and soft new year!

I Fall On Grass by @tackytigerfic Drarry, T, 3.1k

I adore stories with mature characters and this one is no exception. It’s so charming: gentle pining over the years, throughout the realities of life and parenthood, written with such a light hand. And lovely worldbuilding of a slow life that they built for themselves, which left me smiling the whole day after reading it. It feels like a soft caress for my soul.

It’s Me or the Peacock by harrows Drarry, T, 4.6

Do you ever feel like reading a fun, lighthearted fic that will have you grinning all day? Look no further, this is the one. Picture this: established Drarry taking the plunge to move in together, except Draco is bringing his “avian third wheel” with him, adding a feathered twist to the mix. Harry can’t quite believe what’s happening and that’s not even the half of it. This fic is a delight!

Sun Shower by @moonmanatee Drarry, T, 6k

Meet Orkie (short for Snorkel), the delightful cat who loves his boy Harry very much. They share a special bond, silently understanding not to delve into the origins of their pasts. What matters most is their companionship and the comforting routine they’ve woven together. Now, enter Draco Malfoy, a fashion icon with phenomenal outfits, his mud-loving dog, Hubert, and a dash of mouthwatering culinary creations. Your heart will grow three sizes by the time you’re done reading; mine certainly did.

Birds Behaving Badly by @peachpety Drarry, E, 10.5k

Oh, this fic!! I swear my whole body was wiggling with delight when I read it – it’s hilarious and hot and so witty. Draco has a type, which leads to a fun case of mistaken identity, all artfully resolved with the intervention of a conniving seagull, Kevin. Brace yourself for some sassy Slytherin banter, side characters so vividly portrayed they’ll steal your heart (Goyle, I’m looking at you), and the enchanting backdrop of a magical Brighton in the summer. Cue the squeals of delight! 

A Saviour’s Guide to Manners and Decorum by @wolfpants Drarry, E, 13k

I have read every fic Wolf has written this year and, let me tell you, choosing just one feels like an impossible task – I wish I could include them all. But here is my pick, and it’s not because it happened to be my birthday gift. This fic is a gem, seamlessly blending humor with a soft, wistful touch (oh, and do I need to mention it’s also incredibly hot?). It resonates because Harry just wants to be accepted for who he is, refusing to change for anyone (as he rightly shouldn't!). Enter Draco, who is here to help, and not to “fix him”. Sprinkle that with a subtle hint of D/s dynamics, a generous serving of UST, and a sensual shaving scene, and you have got the perfect fic. LOVE!

I only want the ones I envy (I envy) by @porcelainheart3 Drarry, E, 13.5k

This fic is so stunning! A coming-out story with writing so clean and sharp it made me laugh out loud through (lots of) inevitable tears. It has a very competent magical inventor Draco, who wears sock garters(!). It has Harry on a self-discovery journey that feels so very real; with a heart-wrenching childhood flashback that will leave you shattered. It has the most supportive friends. It has banter and flirting and so many wonderful details (look closely at the newspaper in the fic for an extra dose of laughter). And let's not forget the most incredibly emotional blow job; talk about smut with feelings! It’s one of those fics that made me read the rest of the author’s catalog immediately (and trust me, you should too!).

A Time, Dark and Divine by @moonflower-rose Established Drarry, Draco/Ron/Harry, E, 17k

Oh boy oh boy oh boy, this fic is so scorching hot. And their dynamic is so complex: jealousy and possessiveness wrapped up in a delicious package of a boys' trip in Thailand. A stunning Ron POV filled to the brim with complicated history and tension, incredible characterization for all three of them, culminating, inevitably, in hot-hot-hot sex. I couldn’t get this story out of my head for days. If you, like me, like feelings with your smut, this one’s for you! 

Waking Up Slow by @sweet-s0rr0w and @ihopeyoubothstaysafefromharm Drarry, E, 22k

This story is so charming and whimsical! First of all, this Draco is such an utter delight that I fell in love with him right away. He’s so entertaining! The concept of Christmas in July gives the story a wonderfully atmospheric and slightly wistful tone. Add to it a very domestic and playful dynamic between Draco and Harry, top-notch dialogue, so many creative details, and an absolutely delicious and intimate sex scene. From beginning to end, this fic is so warm and touching; a gentle romance that feels as if it was enchantingly sprinkled with a cheering charm.

the first in line by @oflights Drarry, E, 29.5k

This fic is hilarious, mischievous, and sexy all at the same time. And also a little bit unhinged in the best possible way. It had me in its grip from the very first sentence: “When the clock strikes midnight on his 25th birthday, Harry is having a threesome with a werewolf and a vampire.” (chef’s kiss!) and it didn’t let me go. We have a reluctant and grumpy Veela Harry, an over-the-top Draco, summer vacation vibes, a magical yacht, wooing with a hot air balloon (and more!), plus an absolutely delightful non-monogamous background Romione. Gah!!!

Of Magical Beings Being - Magic by @rockingrobin69 Drarry, E, 30k

What’s actually magic here is Robin’s writing. It’s… wait, I don’t think I have words for how rich and full this world is, how special! There’s pining and soft angst and an unreliable narrator and exes to lovers, but somehow all that doesn’t even begin to describe what this story is. It’s witty and fascinating and soft and playful. It’s about loving the other person so much that you do the wrong thing because you think that’s what they want, even though it hurts you. It’s about manifesting them in everything you do until they come back. It’s about Love, about Happiness. It knocked the breath out of me. It’s unbearably lovely.

Winner takes it all by @skeptiquewrites Drarry, E, 41k

This fic is absolutely devastating in a sort of gentle way. My heart broke a million times for this wonderful, hardworking, cornered Draco – who’s looking after his mum – as well as for a whole bunch of beautifully written side characters. The story starts with a bet, and from there, it unravels with Tee's razor-sharp writing, infused with nuance that makes the narrative incredibly rich and undeniably real. If you're in the mood for a cathartic cry, followed by a sweet, happy ending, don't walk – run to this fic!

[mister-tom-a-dildo-lover]

You know that new anime where the guy hears his bosses porny thoughts about him whenever they end up touching? Think of that for Tomarry. I know you said you don't do porn for these, but that doesn't meant you can't make Harry experience a wide range of Tom's interesting thoughts! Also congrats on the milestone! :3

A Cherry Magic! AU. XD

Fandom: HP Ship: Tomarry RATED: M-Rated(for language and descriptions XD) TAGS: Cherry Magic! AU, Drama, Humor, Explicit Language, Innuendo, Flirting, Pornographic Thoughts, Magic(in-universe version), Homophobia(in thoughts only)

~.O.~

For Want of a Cherry!

It was just supposed to be a legend! A little folk tale that was supposed to shame people for not being sexually adventurous or something! Because, of course, people would have to put so much stock into whether or not you have sexual experience.

The day that Harry James Potter turned 30 his world was flipped upside down. His friend, Ron, had told him about that. little legend last week, teasing. him about the fact that he was still single. His wife, Hermione, who had been their friend since they were in primary school, had smacked him upside the head and told him that there was no shame in not being in a romantic relationship, nor was their shame in either sleeping around or not sleeping around.

He'd been on blind dates of all sorts over the years. Some even set up by his friends themselves, but maybe he was just really boring. None of them had elicited any kind of reaction, regardless of how attractive the other person was.

Maybe he was just one of those people who was not destined to be in a romantic relationship of any sort. There were people who went their whole lives not getting married and not having children, and they weren't miserable for it. It was completely possible to live a fulfilling life without having a partner at your side.

But the one thing that Harry could never really let go of was the fact that he was kind of bitter. People his age liked to go out to the clubs, or go drinking, or try out illegal substances. They were experimenting with different forms of entertainment and finding the places that helped them be themselves. And Harry had no interest in doing things like that.

He was probably the biggest introvert in the world, despite all of the sports he played back in school. Despite all of the events he had been forced to attend to support his parents and their business. Despite all of the dinners the company he worked for orchestrated constantly.

Harry James Potter was just avoidant and hated when he had to go places and be with people!

But deep down, he did wish that he could finally have some kind of reaction to somebody! Being, the perpetual third wheel that was resting outside of all of his friends and their romantic relationships was really annoying.

And now here he was on the day of his 30th birthday. Now, suddenly, frighteningly aware of the fact that that little tale that Ron had told him in jest last week was apparently true!

The barista at the coffee shop he went to every day had always given him a bad vibe. He couldn't really explain it because she had always been positively pleasant, but it always felt very fake. Enough for Hermione to smack him and tell him that judging without just cause wasn't good and made him look sexist.

He didn't personally agree with that but knew it was something Hermione took seriously, and he'd never experienced anything sexist save for the time a guy thought he was a girl back during fifth form.

But today the bad vibes were proven to have been legit!

He'd reached out to accept his iced spiced coffee and his hand brushed the barista's fingers in the process. His mind was instantly flooded with her voice despite her mouth being closed.

He's so hot! He'd be great boyfriend material if he was more masculine and less poof-y!

For a moment he thought he'd imagined it. But no... he'd frozen in place and as such, their connected hands revealed more of her mind to him.

Maybe I can turn him straight!

He mumbled a nervous word of gratitude and shuffled off before he could hear any more.

Harry had to find out how this worked and if it was there to stay!

Also, the barista was a homophobe. Nothing like vindication for the vibe check failing.

~.O.~

God, his hair is perfect. It just flops around when he moves and gets in his eyes so adorably! I want to tuck it behind his ear and cradle his face between my hands!

I wonder if my mom will make curry tonight.

Those glasses made him look so dashing too! I could stare at him all day.

Sandra looks like shite, as always. I've always been prettier than her so what does John see in her!

Maybe, if I play my cards right, I can get him to agree to come to dinner with me tonight. Maybe I can even convince him to come back home with me. It's his birthday after all. I'd treat him so well too.

Fucking birds shat all over my bloody car and now I have to deal with this bastard's cheery face all damn day.

I don't even like him like that but he keeps coming on to me and he knows how I feel about it but he just won't stop! I'll need to call my brother. He'll scare Ted away.

I would bend him over the desk in my office and eat him out so well he wouldn't be able to walk afterward.

Harry flushed instantly and looked around, finding himself trapped in the lift with about a dozen people and five of them were touching him at once!

A hand on his shoulder made him jump, and he found Tom Riddle, his boss, standing behind him. The person Harry was practically leaning against in the far corner of the lift to try and avoid everyone else! The owner of that delightfully built torso.

The only one on the lift who could possibly know it was Harry's birthday... meaning... those horny thoughts had been from... him...

"Are you well, Harry? Your face is flushed," he said, placing a hand directly on Harry's brow to check.

His mind was flooded with Tom's thoughts immediately.

His skin is so smooth. I want to put my teeth on his neck and leave it ringed in bruises. I'd have him sit on my face as I decorate his thighs with my marks. My tongue shoving so deep inside that he sees star-

"I'm fine!" Harry said, backing away a bit, only to be assaulted with the thoughts of too many people at once. He stepped right back into the near-circle of Tom's arms, and tried to ignore how pleased this seem to make the man who usually seemed so unaffected by everything.

Since when was he harbouring... thoughts of this nature?

About Harry of all people?!

Tom's horny thinking was definitely more preferable than a whole host of screaming minds all complaining about different things at once, but God, was it embarrassing. He just thought like that when his face showed absolutely nothing!

If we were alone in here, I could have my way with Harry all I want. Hell, I'm certain I could fuck him from behind without anyone even noticing him sitting all pretty on my cock. It's sixty floors until we get to ours after all. If I stand in the corner with Harry leaning against my chest, I could get him off well before we'd have to leave. Shove my cock between his thighs and fuck them good and hard and push just the tip in at the end- he'd be a mess all day.

And Tom's hands were just resting on Harry's waist, holding him still as his face displayed concern that did not match what his mind was going on about!

Eventually, Harry was freed from the confines of the lift, but still found Tom at his side, holding to his elbow with most avid attention. "Perhaps you should take off for the day," he suggested kindly, brows knitted together. "I'd much rather you be healthy and whole."

And in good condition for when I wreck that arse of yours.

Harry flushed and shook his head. "I'm fine," he reiterated. "I can work just fine." And get to his desk which was across the office from Tom's personal office.

"Let me know if you change your mind. If all goes well, I'll treat you to dinner tonight to celebrate your birthday."

And then take you home and fuck you good and proper.

Wow.

So, it seemed... that Harry's body could react to something after all.

It just required Tom Riddle to be the one saying it.

~.O.~

A/N: Here you go! XD

I can't believe I did this.

[Ko-Fi]

[stevebattle]

Kermit (1978), by Ron Milner and Larry Nicolson, Cyan Engineering, Atari's secret think tank in Grass Valley, CA.

"The robot was a pet project for Nolan Bushnell, then still the head of Atari and a very creative guy. Its purpose in life was as Nolan put it to "bring me a beer!" Navigation for robots was a sketchy thing at that time with lots of pioneering work at MIT but no consumer cost ideas. Nolan brought us the incredibly original idea to navigate a robot (which mostly meant knowing where it was) by means of scanning bar codes attached here and there to the baseboards in the rooms the robot was to service. Why it wasn't patented I don't know.

I had lots of fun building the R2D2 style robot about 20" tall. I liked to put mechanical and electronic things together and we had a great shop at Cyan. Its brain was one of the 6502 based single board computers-I think it was a KIM but not sure. Locomotion was two DC gear motor driven wheels and an instrumented caster-about the same rig as a modern Roomba. A rotatable turret covered with a plexiglass dome carried microphones, an IR sensor to detect people, and ultrasonic ranging sensors I built on a separate PC board. A speaker so Kermit could beep gleefully, of course.

A ring of contact-detecting burglar alarm sensing tape (green in the pictures) around Kermit's middle told the software he had hit something and should back off. The ultrasonics provided range to obstacles and to some extent direction as the turret was rotated, so we could go around things.

My pride and joy was the barcode remote scanner which was mounted on the bottom of the robot so its rotating head would be level with the barcodes on the baseboards. It had a vertical telescope tube with a beam splitter between the IR Led and the photodiode sensor and a lens to focus 2-20' away. It aimed down at a front surface mirror at 45 degree to scan horizontally. The mirror was mounted on a motor driven turret so it spun around continuously with a sensor once around to resolve the continuous angular position of the beam horizontally of course with respect to Kermit's rotational position. Unfortunately, this part of the robot did not survive the closing of our group. The barcodes I made for the prototype to detect were about 4" tall made of 3/4" reflective 3m tape on black poster board.

My programming partner on the project was Larry Nicholson, a really bright guy. He made the barcode reading work to detect not only the barcodes, but where they were angularly with respect to the robot and also their subtended angle or apparent size (all from timing of the rotation of the scanner) which was a measure of distance combined with angle from the barcode. We worked out some pretty clever math to resolve that information from two or three of the barcodes into a position and orientation of Kermit in the room. We had rented an empty room upstairs on the third floor of the Litton building to try all this out and work out the navigation. Larry and I got the basic navigation and obstacle avoidance working so Kermit could go from one place to a designated other place in the room and avoid wastebaskets placed randomly. We demonstrated it to Nolan and he was impressed.

Shortly thereafter Warner Communication who had bought Atari from Nolan kicked him out and the Kermit project was cancelled."

– Kermit The Robot Notes by Ron Milner.

[reareaotaku]

Being Friends w/ Kim Possible [& More]

Romantic & Platonic Themes Tw: Slight struggle w/ sexuality

Kim became friends with you because you were both on the cheer team

She took a keen interest in you because you were smarter than the average high schooler. You found out about her fighting crime, while no one else knows- Though, it's not like she has a secret identity or something

She's very impressed with your knowledge on gadgets and how to make them [Like laser lipstick]

She uses your intelligence to her advantage

She finds you very entertaining and even asks you to help her sometimes when Ron fails

You end up spending a lot of time together... Especially alone... A lot...

You become very well acquainted. To the point where Kim knows more about you than she does Ron

Though, you're such an easy person for her to click with. She feels like you understand her on a deeper level. You understand her 'girl' things when no one else [Ron] does

She loves having sleepovers with you. It makes it easier when you both have to go fight crime

At first she was pretty iffy about involving you in her crime fighting, because she didn't want you getting hurt, because she would feel responsible. But, you kept pushing it and you were relentless. Like you did not give up. She finally decided to let you join when you snuck on a mission and helped defeat Shego

Ron feels like a third wheel when hanging out with you both, because you are both so enthralled with each other

"Oh, Y/n I love what you did with your hair!"

"Oh my gosh Kim, that move you did during practice was incredible. You have to teach me!"

He'll roll his eyes and make some snippy comment about leaving you 'love birds' alone. ["Well, since you guys love each other so much, I guess I'll leave you two alone."]

"Okay, Ron. Have fun doing your thing," Kim said waving him off, not really listening, since she was showing you a video on her phone. She was just so happy to have a girl friend

Loves doing your makeup and then you doing hers, even though she doesn't wear make up often

Loves spilling tea and getting silly drama from you

Talking about all the cute boys and all the girls on cheer

You just clicked so well with Kim. She had truly never felt this way about anyone before.

Though, it was a strange feeling... Like different than how she felt about other people

Like she wanted to be more than a friend- But, no she couldn't

That kind of thing wasn't normal... But she really liked you. She liked you like boys like girls or girls like boys... But you're both girls?

Girls can't like girls... Can they?

She tries talking to her dad about it first- Bad idea- but he isn't even listening to her, so Kim goes to her mom. Her parents are very open-minded, so Kim's mother is quick to tell Kim it sounds like she has a crush

"But mom, she's a girl."

"So? What's that have to do with anything?"

"Girls don't date girls..."

"Yes they do. And boys date boys and so on and on. It's natural, even if some say it's not. You know, penguin's partake in homosexual relations."

"I'm not a penguin, Mom."

"Well, if it wasn't a thing, we wouldn't have a name for it. You know, I think you should tell her how you feel."

Kim is hesitant at first- But she's forced to when almost seeing you die

Dr. Drakken had pushed you off a cliff and Kim watched you fall to what she presumed was your death

When she saw you again, she hugged you super tight and all her feelings just came spilling out

[malarkgirlypop]

What the Easy men are ticketed for when driving

Richard Winters:

He has all of his paperwork at the ready the police officer doesn’t even have to ask. He’s very apologetic, but he didn’t do anything wrong. Dick politely chats with the officer, he’s not intimidated by the man but he’s being cautious. When the officer says he made a mistake and lets him go, Dick is very understanding. They even exchange information, talk about meeting up. You feel like a third wheel for a hot sec. He has never had a ticket.

Lewis Nixon:

IM NOT DRUNK!!!! I CAN DANCE, I’LL PROVE IT!!! 'Darling stay in the car', proceeds to fall out of the car while trying to exit. The cop and you exchange a glance. You follow the cop car to the station, you can see Nixon’s little head in the back window. He was indeed drunk. Yeah you should've seen it coming he had to blow into a breathalyser before starting the car, turns out that's why you were there.

Harry Welsh:

Nervous around the cop, tries to make small talk but the guy isn’t having it. You sit there in awkward silence as the cops leaves to fill out the paperwork. Harry got pulled over cause he was trying to show you a trick, but the trick was swerving back and forward across the lanes and wasn’t very impressive. Sheepishly takes the fine, with a mumbled apology.

Ronald Speirs:

Asserts dominance over the cop, uses his killer stare. The cop is jumpy under his cold glare. He’s not smug about it, stating facts about the law making the cop look dumb. The officer can tell he’s fighting a losing battle so tries to rescind the fine. Ron is very happy about this reaching out if the window to give the cop a pat on his arm. "It’s ok, people make mistakes". Leaves the police man in the dust before the interaction is truly over. He was speeding, but it was fine, he had somewhere important to be.

Carwood Lipton:

I feel like he would be the same as Winters. Very calm and collected, hearing out the officer. Obviously it's our baby boy and he hasn't done anything wrong. Even if the cop was a total dick, Lip would be so polite and understanding. I think it would piss off the cop that he wasn't talking back, giving a "Have a good night officer", as the cop marches away muttering under his breath. I'm sure he would turn to you saying, "shall we?" before pulling away from the curb. He did nothing wrong, Lip getting fined. Ha! You wish.

George Luz:

Thinks he is a stand up comedian and can get out of the ticket by telling jokes. Unfortunately for Luz he gets the most grumpy, stoic officer of all time. George crashes and burns with each quip and pun, you sink lower in your seat hoping the ground will swallow you whole, (we all know second hand embarrassment is the silent killer). Finally he receives the ticket and you sit in silence while he re-thinks his entire life. Before making the most ridiculous remark sending everyone into hysterics. He is very proud of himself, "I knew I still got it. He was just a bad crowd." Very pleased with himself he doesn't even care he got a ticket. What was the ticket you ask. Trying to stand and drive. Yeah this isn't his first time either, yikes George.

Joe Toye:

Yeah no this man never gets pulled over. Even if he does, he will evade the police. His brag is that he has never been ticketed. Well, they have never been able to catch him to give it to him. He will never tell you what he does to be chased by the police, the mystery of it all. Bill says its cause he's a shit driver.

Bill Guarnere:

Knows everyone, so when he is pulled over all you get is, "Wild Bill you mad dog, I haven't seen you in years!" Buddies with the whole police force, gets let off the hook way too often. Has broken all the laws, but hey when you know everyone, what really are laws?

Joe Liebgott:

You all might think he's a bad boy rebel with the most tickets out of the lot. But you forget, hes a tried and true cabby. Like Bill he knows everyone, all you have to do is utter his name and you can get a million stories about the man. His brag is that he has never been ticketed, sure he's broken the law, but he never gets caught. Unlike some people *cough cough* Toye. But hey Toye hasn't actually been caught, just been in multiple car chases.

David Webster:

He's offended you think he drives. Clearly passenger seat princess, put some respect on his name. Has been fined for not wearing a seatbelt and standing up through the sun roof singing Unwritten, but that's just a vibe and he has the ticket framed on his wall.

Buck Compton:

The self proclaimed 'best driver of the group'. He's daddy and drives around his baby boy's. He's like the dad that picks you up from Saturday sport, 'who wants to stop at McDonalds?' His car is the vibe, everyone always fights over who rides with him on road trips. Has the best songs and snacks for the road trips, he laughs in the face of tickets, this man is untouchable and has a squeaky clean record. May have tried to do a donut, but he'll never tell.

Eugene Roe:

Pfft, this man getting pulled over. You're dreaming. The most calm driver. He's like my nana, anyone heard of the story the tortoise and the hare, yeah well he's the tortoise. No one wants to drive with him if they need to be somewhere in a hurry, he's too nice and gives way to everyone. This man panics when the police pass him, even when he's doing nothing wrong.

Babe Heffron:

If Gene is the tortoise, then Babe is definitely the hare. Hold on for dear life if you ride with this man. The most chaotic driving of all time. Over taking, under taking, side by side taking? Yeah he does it all. You see orange light, he sees pedal to the metal. Speed limits are just suggestions to this man. The amount of fines and tickets this man gets in a year he could buy a whole other car.

Donald Malarkey:

He's a good driver, but boy oh boy he's easily distracted. If you're sitting in the back showing photos to the rest of the boys, he's turning around fully in the seat to see what's going on. The most common phrase in his car is, "Don watch the road!" He's a fun driver having the best songs and also has karaoke mics in the car that he hands back, but please encourage him to keep both hands on the wheel and both eyes on the road. The ads the are on the side of the road are catered just for him, he can't help himself when he sees something flashy. Has rear ended a car or two, maybe one of them was a police officer, but no one was there to see it.

Skip and Penk:

They don't drive. Skip is clearly a passenger princess and Alex is a backseat babe! Just tell them to please keep all limbs inside the car. Should not be allowed in Malarks car as they are the reason for his distraction but the love it, you will have to pry them out of the car they aren't splitting up!!

[saintsenara]

Wheel Anon here. I keep thinking about a certain ship. Hear me out. Canonically, Harry cannot tell the difference between Parseltongue and English. They both sound the same to him. When Ron demonstrates how he opened the CoS to retrieve basilisk fangs, Harry cannot understand him. Implying Ron failed to speak Parseltongue so how did he open COS since he got the fangs? Ron/Slytherin(House) is canon? Do we count CoS a separate entity? CoS clocked Ron being fit & decided Ron can have access 😏

the explanations for this, in order from least likely to most likely, are as follows:

1. the way that canon hints that harry's ability to speak parseltongue is because he's a horcrux, rather than him being a true parselmouth, is that he only seems to be able to speak and/or understand parseltongue if a snake [or, at the very least, the image of one] is actually present. he couldn't understand ron because there was no snake nearby. [hermione could have told him otherwise...]

2. ron drowned during the second task and dumbledore covered it up [it would have been his third strike and he didn't fancy azkaban] by creating a fake!ron from the basilisk fang harry stabbed the diary with, who differed from the original only in that his origins gave him access to the chamber.

3. gryffindor/slytherin is - let's be real - canon, which allows us to state with certainty that gryffindor had been added to the access list for the chamber to pet slytherin's basilisk. plus, we all know that the early 2000s fan theory that ron is time-travelling dumbledore is obviously wrong. because ron is time-travelling godric gryffindor.

4. voldemort's locket, during its month-long run of whispering outrageously romantic things into ron's ear, taught him how to sweet talk the entrance of the chamber [and - well - other holes....] into opening. these were vocabulary lessons any fragments of the dark lord's soul had never bothered to waste on harry.

[misguidedasgardian]

The Lifeaters (III.3)

III. Your greatest fear

MASTERLIST

Chapter Summary: Your classes test you in unimaginable ways 

Pairings: Draco Malfoy x Fem!Reader (platonic)

Warnings: Cursing, magical objects, Mugglephobia, classism, charms and curses, might miss some warnings

Wordcount: 3,4 k

Notes: I’m adapting a lot of parts of the books… hehe…

Have you seen Brooklyn 99? if you have you’ll now this

If you see something say something, come on and party tonighttttt wooooooo

Tuesday nor Wednesday Draco went to classes, his arm still tightly taped to his side, you helped him in what you could, no, actually, in what he would let you help him, you offered to carry his bag but he made Goyle do it, he wouldn’t let you personally carry his things or help him up, nothing that would require strength, you wanted to feel insulted, but what he truly meant is that he did not wanted you to “trouble” yourself

Also he was enjoying the attention you and Pansy were giving him, letting you fix his hair and robes, and even help him eat

It felt nice to help a friend

So Thursday you had potions, and Dray could not miss that.

Most classes would put aside one block, one hour and a half of your schedule, but not potions.

Many took too long to prepare, so once a week, you had THREE consecutive hours to brew potions and be almost tortured by Professor Snape

Even though they were almost on the same floor, the potions classroom was nothing like your common room. It was stuffy, damp and the various smells from the potions made it really hard to breathe or have a nice time, on the contrary, it also depended on the potion that was being brewed, sometimes they made the air lighter, so every class was everyone’s guess.

All eyes where on you when you arrived with Draco to the potions classroom, you shared the class with the Gryffindors, and many of them looked annoyed when they saw Dray’s grimace 

Pansy wouldn’t leave your side either.

You didn’t know how to feel

You liked her, she was your friend, but you were not used to a “third wheel” in yours and Draco’s relationship, before there was Vince, Greg and even Matthew near him, but they couldn’t get that close to him

Pansy was managing to do so, and it made you a bit queasy 

Draco whimpered when you settle in your places and Pansy was on him on a 

"How is it, Draco?”, she asked, in a tone a bit sweet for your taste, "Does it hurt much?"

“Yes”, he said, trying to show himself brave, but as soon as Pansy looked away, he winked at Greg and Vince, you slapped his good arm, annoyed, he looked back at you apologetically

Your attention was called by Snape, the class was going to start

You were a bit late, but your professor didn’t say anything, you enjoyed more… freedom… with the head of your house than with other teachers, it almost made you a bit embarrassed

But then you remembered all teachers who were heads of houses had a soft spot for their students, Snape had a soft spot for you lot, his house.

“Today were going to be making a Shrinking solution”, snape Introduced, “please take out your ingredients” 

You were sharing one of the big tables with Potter, Granger, Longbottom, Weasley, Greg, Vince, Draco and Pansy

"Sir," Dray called, "sir, I'll need help cutting up these daisy roots, because of my arm…", you looked at him, wanting to offer your help, but Snape had other plans

"Weasley, cut up Malfoy's roots for him"

“I can do it”, you whispered to him, but he shook you off

“He told Wesley to do it”, he said with a smirk, oh how he was enjoying this

"There's nothing wrong with your arm," Ron accused him

"Weasley, you heard Professor Snape; cut up these roots”, he demanded, and Weasley started to masacre those poor roots

“Professor!”, called Draco, “Weasley is mutilating my roots!”, Snape even seemed happy with this arrangements

“Weasley, change roots with Malfoy”, he demanded, and you could barely choke in a giggle

So the redhead had to spend double time trying to fix his roots for himself to use, you tried to focus on your own ingredients, but Draco had you a bit on edge.

Don’t misinterpret this, it was fun to pick on Potter and Weasley, but not in the middle on the potions class, when many things could go wrong

"And, sir, I'll need this shrivelfig skinned," said Dray, pushing his luck, you actually liked working with the plant

“I can do it Dray”, you offered, and you felt Pansy’s heated gaze on you 

"Potter, you can skin Malfoy's shrivelfig," was the response

“It’s no trouble”, you insisted

“He said Potter to do it”, Draco said with a smile

Potter was quick to skin those poor plants, and slided them over the table at Draco as quickly as he could. Draco’s face was one of victory, he seemed pleased with himself. 

Oh but not yet

"Seen your pal Hagrid lately?", he asked them with a mean smirk

"None of your business," responded Weasley.

It was a sore topic, you did not like the turn it had taken

"I'm afraid he won't be a teacher much longer," Said Draco. "Father's not very happy about my injury… he complained to the school’s governors and all", he said, sighing, “And a lasting injury like this…who knows if my arm will ever be the same again?". You wanted to tell him to drop it, you did, back in the common room, but he wouldn’t listen, the horrible gash in his arm looked terrible.

“So that’s why you are doing this!”, said Potter, “you want to get him sacked!”

“Well, maybe”, teased Draco, “Weasley, why don’t you slice up my caterpillars for me?”

The Redhead was about to throw his cauldron at him, when Professor Snape walked by the table, looking into Longbottom’s cauldron

"Tell me, boy, does anything penetrate that thick skull of yours? Didn't you hear me say, quite clearly, that only one spleen was needed? Didn't I state plainly that a dash of leech juice would suffice? What do I have to do to make you understand, Longbottom?", his potion was the wrong color, and Neville looked like he was about to cry. 

"Please, sir," said Granger, there was something about her tone that you really found annoying, "I could help Neville put it right…", you couldn’t help but rolled your eyes, and Draco at your side snickered 

"I don't remember asking you to show off, Miss Granger," you couldn’t help but smile, Snape always saw right through the golden trio, "Longbottom, at the end of this lesson we will feed a few drops of this potion to your toad and see what happens. Perhaps that will encourage you to do it properly.", now that made you raise your eyes from your cauldron up to Neville, who’s hands started shaking

"Help!" he moaned, looking at the entire table

"Hey", said Seamus Finnigan, a Gryffindor who no matter what he was doing, he always managed to provoke an explosion, "Sirius Black's been sighted”, he said, you and Draco shared looks, “it’s all over the daily prophet”

"Where?" asked Potter, all the table were listening

"Dufftown," said Seamus, who looked excited. "It was a Muggle who saw him. By the time the Ministry of Magic got there, he was gone."

"Not too far from here... " said Granger, then Weasley catches us looking

"What, Malfoy? Need something else skinned?", he asked

But Draco was looking at Potter with malice, and you knew exactly was he was about to say

 "Thinking of trying to catch Black single-handed, Potter?", he teased "Yeah, that's right," responded Potter, ever the petulant fool 

You knew what was coming, you had discussed it at length, Sirius black was the one that betrayed Harry’s Parents, causing them to die in the hands of the Dark Lord

"Of course, if it was me, I'd be out there looking for him.", said Draco, “I wouldn’t be staying in school like a good boy”

"What are you talking about, Malfoy?", asked Weasley. And you looked at Potter’s face, looking for any clue, but now it dawned on you… he didn’t know. He didn’t know what Black had done, of course you did, because uncle Lucius didknow, he was deep in the Ministry. 

But Potter didn’t know what Sirius had done to his family, and why he was out, probably looking for him.

"Don't you know, Potter?", asked Draco, truly surprised, but he looked like he did on Christmas mornings

"Know what?". Draco laughed cruelly, it made your skin crawl.

"Maybe you'd rather not risk your neck," he said. "Want to leave it to the dementors, do you? But if it was me, I'd want revenge. I'd hunt him down myself."

"What are you talking about?" asked Potter angrily

You were going to tell Draco to stop, but Snape did it for you, calling the attention of the entire class 

"You should have finished adding your ingredients by now; this potion needs to stew before it can be drunk, so clear away while it simmers and then we'll test Longbottom's... "

Neville stirred his cauldron miserably, with his mouth twisted in agony

You put away your things and Draco before he could say anything, you were somewhat happy that your potion was the right shade of color

A few minutes later, Snape was standing next to Neville, Theo and Matt stood by your side, to watch

"Everyone gather 'round," said Snape, “and watch what happens to Longbottom's toad. If he has managed to produce a Shrinking Solution, it will shrink to a tadpole. If, as I don't doubt, he has done it wrong, his toad is likely to be poisoned”, you grabbed onto the hand that was closest to you, it was Theo’s, he looked at you alarmed, but you only watched as snape with a special instrument took a bit of the potion, while he held Trevor on his other hand

“Professor…”, you couldn’t help it, you were not thinking, Snape looked at you with those dark glistening eyes, “Trevor will… die?”, you asked fearfully, “we understand the consequences Sir, I don’t think it’s necessary…”

He seemed truly surprised 

“Hush your mouth Basilik, unless you want your points removed”, he said angrily. The Gryffindor seemed truly surprised as you intervened 

Theo didn’t released you, you squeezed his hands waiting for the inevitable, if that was Umbra instead, you’d be crying, as Neville shed a single tear of his trembling cheek 

Snape fed Trevor a spoonful of the potion…

You could drop a pin on the classroom and it would be heard loudly, everyone was looking expectantly… and then, with a pop, Trevor had become a tiny little tadpole.

You released Theo, taking a deep breath, relieved… 

Snape, who seemed like he didn’t get any presents for Christmass, took a vial from the insides of his robes and turn Trevor into his normal size again 

"Five points from Gryffindor," said Snape, which wiped the smiles from every face. "I told you not to help him, Miss Granger. Class dismissed." 

You never walked out of potions so quickly, dragging a laughing Draco with you

You went to the great hall to have lunch, not before you sneaking out to the inner courtyard to take a long breath of fresh air, Winter was looming in and you could already feel the chill in the air even though the trees were already turning orange

You weren’t alone

“Hey, ppssttt”, you heard a shushing noise, you looked to your side and saw Theo and Matthew, hiding under the threshold of the castle’s door. Theo was hiding something on his robes

“What?”, you asked, coming near them, they clearly wanted to show me something, but you thought better of it, “I swear for Merlin’s fluffy robes that if I look into something remotely inappropriate I will tell Snape…”

You heard a croak, and your curiosity got the better of you and you looked inside

Theo was hiding a toad, and not just any toad

“Is that Trevor?”, you asked them both who started laughing

“Maybe”, he giggled

“You stole him?”, you asked them, scandalized, and then you looked into both their eyes, “no…”

“What?”, asked Theo

“Please don’t hurt him”, you begged them, honestly scared for the poor familiar

“I will not!”, Theo said, he seemed offended that you believed he was going to hurt him

“Why did you steal it?”, you asked them

“Longbottom didn’t have the guts, he was going to let Snape poison him!”, he said, taking Trevor out of his robes and caressing his tiny head, he was cute… for a toad… 

“So what’s your plan?”, you asked the pair, and they shared looks

“We are going to keep him…”, said Theo

“Yeah, and share custody”, muttered Matt

“What are you three doing with Longbottom’s toad?”, you three freezed at the unmistakable voice of Severus Snape, you three turned slowly, and shaking

“Stealing is not tolerated at Hogwarts”, he said with his dark, dragging voice, “Miss Basilik you interrupt and question my teaching methods and then you steal a classmate’s familiar, this is unacceptable”

“Sir! but…!”

“And furthermore you send a request my way to drop the divination class… not so fast… Gaunt”, he said, grabbing into Matt’s robes who had tried to escape. You looked up at him with wide eyes, “well, lucky for you I found a way to solve your little problem, and… give you and Mister Nott and mister Gaunt a lesson…”

“Which is?”, asked Theo fearfully

“Ancient Runes as Arithmancy are full… but not Muggles studies…”

“No…”, you all whimpered at the same time 

“Congratulations, you three are the very first Slytherins in taking the class”, he said with a smirk that was going to haunt your worst nightmares for years to come.

You didn’t even dared to tell Draco, Matthew, Theo and you looked like you just had seen a ghost, you barely ate… you were so… frighten

It did not help what Professor Lupin had in store for Defense against the Dark class after lunch…

“Boggarts!”, presented Lupin, as he stood in the middle of an empty classroom, with a huge cabinet that was moving like it had something inside it, and it did, “can anybody tell me.. what a Boggart looks like?”. he asked

“No one knows!”, said Granger, “boggarts are shapeshifters, they take on the shape of what that person fears the most, that is why they are so…”

“So terrifying, yes…”, he looked back at the cabinet, “Luckily, there is a very simple spell to repel them, everyone says it with me, wands away… Riddikulus!”, he pronounced in a way that was a bit contrary to what your minds told you to pronounced it

“Ri…di…kulus”, you practiced

“This class is ridiculous”, mocked Draco

Once you had practiced the spell, Lupin put you all in a line

The boggart turned into cobras, spiders… many things… and then… you were standing in front of a turning mesh… a cloud-like creature who was reading your mind to find whatever frightened you the most…

You thought about many things that frightened you, total darkness, being completely alone, death? many, many things, but then… something came out on top

The boggart started taking shape, and the result was a huge mass that almost touched the ceiling with his ugly head…. or rather… lack thereof

Trolls were huge, and this one wasn’t the exception, except… it didn't have a head!

A headless troll, with a bloody stomp where his head should be, was standing in front of you

You couldn’t help but whine in fear, wanting to take a step back

“Well, I have to admit, this is an unusual one”. laughed Lupin

“I can’t believe it Basilik!”, said Draco behind you, and you couldn’t stop looking at it, “still?”, you heard laughs behind you, and that only made you whimper more 

“Wand at the ready Basilik”, said Lupin, who seemed ready to jump, it wasn’t until that thing tried to hit you with his wooden club that you snapped out of your stupor

“Riddikulus!”, you said, in a second the headless troll became a big voodoo-looking doll, that fell to the ground as it was filled with sand

You kept hearing laughs behind you, and Professor Lupin applauded

“Very good Basilik! very good! Potter, you are next!”

Everyone was expectant of what Potter’s boggart was going to be, and you feared the most

A Dementor showed itself in front of you… well… at least it wasn’t the Dark Lord

Lupin stood in front of him, casted the spell, and… he dismissed the class despite the complains of the res of the class

Potter had the tendency of ruining things 

But if the first class was any indication, finally you had a competent Defense against the Dark Arts teacher, and you were excited, despite hearing Draco talking very rudely about Lupin’s appearance.

He did look like he had been attacked by a pack of Wampuses

. . .

The rest of the week, and for the weekend you three were acting as you were guilty of committing an awful crime and everybody was suspecting you. Draco was too “angry” at you for dropping divination that he didn't even ask you what you were going to take instead. Theo and Matthew were as skittish as you, avoiding the subject altogether 

You didn’t even know how everyone else was going to react when you told them, nobody of your house had taken that class 

It wasn’t until the very next week on Monday that you had your first Muggle Studies class

“I can’t believe this is Snape’s idea of a punishment, Longbottom haven’t even noticed that Trevor was missing”, muttered Theo

You had to admit you were somewhat excited… you didn’t even know what to expect, it was a complete mystery of what was going to happen inside that classroom

“An entire year with Muggle studies”, muttered Matthew, “I bet that if we bother that professor enough, she will let us switch”

“I don’t think we should play along with that, it was a miracle they let us change and… Arithmancy and Ancient runes are full”, you muttered, “and we HAVE to take two electives”, you whispered 

That Hufflepuff girl thought you were trying to prank her when you asked her where the muggle studies classroom was.

It was in a part of the castle that you weirdly had walked through a bunch of times, but never took the time to actually tell. 

You walked into the classroom, looking everywhere with surprise in your eyes, the room was filled with… unusual things… muggle things, in the corner, there was this… round transparent object that was glowing! What was that about? they couldn’t use magic!

You then noticed that a complete silence had installed in the room and when you looked around you realized that you were being stared at by the entire class. Some of them even had their mouths wide open at the sight of the three of you

Let’s just say that you would have more luck experiencing a 31st of February than spotting a Slytherin in a Muggle studies class, let alone three, let alone Matthew Gaunt that by this point… had a certain reputation inside the school. 

In front of the class, there was a sweet looking woman, wearing what you guessed was  muggle clothing, she was wearing some school pants, bluish ones, they look so comfortable

“Is this another joke?”, she asked shakily as she saw you three coming in, “Snape is my friend you know, and I’m allowed to take points from Slytherin as well as any other teacher”, she said, she reminded you of Neville 

“Please Professor, this isn’t a mockery”, you tried to explain quickly, your new classmates looked at surprised as the teacher to see three Slytherins in there, “we really want to take this class”, you said, it wasn’t specially true but… whatever 

“You three are warned! any funny business and I will talk with Snape and have you suspended!”, she threatened, and you nodded quickly, so you went and took a seat quickly in the back of the class, and you stayed quiet the entire lesson.

“I may or may not have… pranked her several times last year”, whispered Matthew to your ear 

Even so, both Matthew and Theo were in their best behavior for the first time.

And you had to admit… it was more interesting than you thought.

[ecargmura]

Ron Kamonohashi's Forbidden Deductions Episode 19 Review - Talentnapping

Excuse me? What number did that police car have? 801? In the episode where Ron and Toto go on a date? Diomedea, are you shipping these two as much as the fans? I’m not complaining, though. This was clearly a date episode that was interrupted by work of all things again. Poor RonToto, work will always be the third wheel.

But yeah, a new case means a new situation. Instead of murder, this time, RonToto are dealing with serial kidnappings of talented people. The abductor is known as Hummingbird and they only abduct those with genius talent. Why? Not sure yet… However, the abductor’s target is coincidentally Nyonyon, the singer-songwriter that RonToto go to the concert of with the latter being a fan.

The craziest thing about the case is that we, the viewer, already know who Hummingbird is, if you saw the post-credit scene in the previous episode. Hummingbird is the detective Sanno and also the masked individual Ron spotted by the stairs at the concert venue. This means that the culprit is right next to them, yet Ron and Toto haven’t figured it out yet, which makes sense as they’re in work mode right now and have no idea that Sanno was the guy from earlier. Maybe Ron knows since he did the hair flip? Though, I’m also curious if Sanno is actually a detective or if he’s just posing as one. 

Though, there are a few things bugging me about this case. If Nyonyon is afraid of heights, why is her office at the very top of a clock tower room? Also, is Mitsubashi, the manager, in on the kidnapping scheme or something? She just locked Nyonyon in her composing room while knowing she’s afraid of heights. Having her be alone is like the worst possible thing to happen because someone could easily swoop in from the curtain-shielding window. Or maybe there could be a secret room that Nyonyon was taken into?

New characters mean an influx of voice actors. Although these guys are just characters introduced for this new case, they have quite the well-known voice actors. Nyonyon is voiced by Ayahi Takagaki, who you might know from Durarara as Erika Karisawa. I think she does the singing too. Her manager Mitsubashi is voiced by Ami Koshimizu. Namazu, the newly introduced detective, is voiced by Rikiya Koyama. Sanno, or Hummingbird, is voiced by Takahiro Sakurai which makes me feel conflicted because a minor character like him is voiced by the same voice actor as one of my favorite anime villains Shogo Makishima from Psycho-Pass and that anime also has Akira Amano doing the character designs. Why must you do this?

It feels like the animation quality has went up a bit in this episode with how Nyonyon’s music video was animated. Though, I don’t really expect too much regarding animation for an anime like this as it’s not really action-focused as it is a mystery/detective story. I was just super happy about the RonToto moments. Regardless, I can’t wait to see what happens next. What could Hummingbird’s motive be for all these abductions? What are your thoughts on the episode?

[televisionenjoyer]

hiii ron! it has come to my attention that ive been thinking abt how much i love ur url for a while but have never actually talked abt star trek w u so im wondering. thoughts on mcspirk? bones is my guy and i just need to shove him between spirk i think the triumvirate is so fun. whats ur fav star trek gay sex (or romance), tumblr user startrekgaysex?

(sorry i thought that would be funny. sending love <3)

LOADED QUESTION. see a thing about me is I love throuples. they have great potential. Spones is also like a whole thing like the other day I was watching bread and circuses for the first time and on the fucking jail scene I got jumpscared because I legitimately thought they were gonna kiss (forgot the sixties were homophobic) so it's safe to say I have inclinations and also Kirk and Bones are already married in a way.

All that being said. For me personally. I think Bones is infinitely funnier being the unwilling third wheel to spirk. I must speak my truth. He's guy who didn't sign up for this. Any of it.

[wellthatschaotic]

Teach me qsmp lore please. Preferably chronological order; where does it all begin & all that jazz

okay SO

buncha guys are on a train to Quesadilla Island. there is a Huge Wall in the middle of the island. a duck greets them and says "whatever you do don't press the big red button". they press the big red button. the wall Crumbles. yay! duck comes back and says "wtf now you Can Never Leave The Island". also theres a ton of like ruins/old crusty buildings on the island and their first task was to restore electricity so like. there probably Used To Be People Here.

then! new Building appears! duck says "you idiots woke up a dragon and it flew away. now you gotta take care of her eggs". new building turns out to be an adoption center!! there are two parents per egg and each parent has to be from a different language (at the time it was only spanish and english). i forget who the parents were (this was long before i was In The Fandom) but essentially government assigned gay marriage. anyway they have to take care of the eggs and keep them happy and stuff so they don't Die

also there's a guy named cucurucho who's like one of the top federation guys. hes a bitch. then theres another cucurucho (osito bimbo) whos not a bitch. he appears out of nowhere and speaks in like pre generated text to speech voice lines and also writes and gives people books to communicate

also! an enemy is made called The Code or the Binary Entity! it's. well. exactly what it sounds like. a floating mess of ones and zeroes in black and green. and it is Violent and attacks the eggs

spoiler. some of the eggs die. its very sad. there is conflict. i am going to skip to where i joined the fandom because i don't know too much about the Middle Parts

so the eggs go missing. horrible awful tragedy. everyone is upset (and begins to go Insane). forever is so angry and sad he goes and pretty much attacks cucurucho. he then gets drugged on Happy Pills and becomes an absolute weirdo. pac goes and gets kidnapped/drugged on purpose and finds a Cure. yay! the get the leftover Happy Pills and put them in a very secure safe. it is not very secure. bbh immediately steals the pills just to prove that he could. the safe is later reinforced further. also when forever was detoxing he screamed that cucurucho told him that the eggs weren't kidnapped they ran away because of an Even Worse Danger. which some of the islanders believe and some dont

bbh does not buy it and kidnaps a federation worker who he named ron and we later found out is WB011. the workers dont get names and there are tiers D-A, d is the lowest A is the highest. also bbh has fully lost all the color on his skin and is torturing himself with soul vultures and is now covered in his own corrupted blood and torn clothes. hes also canonically completely colorblind

while this is happening tubbo is flirting with fred, another federation worker (WA02). so he's a fed worker defender 100%.

tubbo breaks into fred's office and finds two books: one saying bbh is suspicious and possibly dangerous and advising workers to avoid him. then next book says worker WB011 has not clocked in or out of work for several days and is missing. he draws the conclusion that bbh has kidnapped WB011.

unfortunately bbh had some sort of psychotic episode and. um. ate ron.

also tubbo, slimescicle and. fuck i forget the third person. got coordinates from a chest surrounded by black concrete. each of them had one of the 3 coordinates (x, y, and z) and it took them like 45 minutes to connect the dots. they are led to the entrance of a Maze. when they get through the maze they find a circular room with a wheel numbered 1-8 in roman numerals, surrounded by the eggs signature belongings. obviously they all Freak Out and try to find a way to get in. tubbo enderpearls through the barriers and spins the wheel. lava pours down from everywhere. rip

a little later everyone goes in the maze and finds a room thats like some sort of control room with a big red button. when they press it theres a dialogue that said "i think i found something about the eggs disappearance. lets continue this conversation on the main channel"

at some point they find the circular room again and it has the wheel again but this time the only egg belonging is chayenne's rubber ducky. strange.

more black concrete keeps appearing, then a huge alien structure appears. THEN. they find a message on black concrete FROM THE EGGS!!! wherever they are they can't get back and can only send one message at a time. two more alien structures end up appearing.

tubbo digs a giant hole with a world eater that bbh and aypierre hate so he names it the controversial hole.

bbh is slowly testing everyone on the island to see who he can trust and who he can't, and is implying to everyone that he will burn the world down and kill everyone to get the eggs back. we support his wrongs

philza gets kidnapped and put in a bird house for like a week, thinks it's a bad dream and can't really remember what happened.

bagi arrives with nothing but a frying pan and determination. she somehow has the code for the main channel, but they don't know what to input the code in to make it work.

etoiles now has a love/hate relationship with the codes and enjoys fighting them for fun. he kills one and the only thing it drops are its sword, shield, and a book saying "protect". he takes that to mean protect everyone on the island.

at this point everyone is incredibly suspicious of everyone else btw.

also yesterday bagi told fred that tubbo was in love with him and this morning tubbo got a letter from fred rejecting him and signed it "WA02". my ship has crashed and burned i'm so sad. he has also heavily implied he will Ruin Bagi for this

i definitely missed things but this is a lot of the gist of it i think !

[none-ofthisnonsense]

Hamilton eyeing grand prize; Motor racing: British Grand Prix.

The Sunday Times, 10 Jul 2005 (by Richard Rae)

The 20-year-old has won in every category in which he has raced and tells Richard Rae of his resolve to become the first black driver to compete in F1.

WHEN Lewis Hamilton says he doesn't think about it any more, you believe him.

Focus is, after all, one of the primary requirements of any driver aiming to break into F1, and the fact that Hamilton is black is irrelevant.

Occasionally, however, he gets a reminder. Such as just before the European Formula Three race in Zandvoort a month ago, when they lined all 45 drivers up for a group photograph and his was the only black face, as it has been throughout his career. Not that the other drivers have seen much of it because usually they're behind him.

Hamilton, 20, has dominated European F3 this season, winning seven of the 10 races so far. It is a remarkable record, which should give him a good chance of securing an F1 test seat, if not a race drive, next season. It would prove he's good enough; that he is also tough enough, mentally and physically, goes without saying.

Hamilton was three when his father, Anthony, an IT manager whose parents came from Trinidad, bought him a remote-controlled car; six when he first raced a kart; eight when he got the first kart of his own. "It was to give us something to do together," recalls Hamilton. "My parents were divorced when I was very young and I used to go to Dad at weekends, but we didn't have much money. The kart was about fifth-hand. But I started to win straight away."

To fund his son's obsession, Hamilton Sr took a second and even a third job; a season of karting costs tens of thousands of pounds. The Hamiltons weren't wealthy, but Lewis had talent and others recognised it. Jenson Button's father, John, who was still running a kart preparation business, was one, supplying him with free engines. Others supplied tyres or fuel. In 1995, Hamilton, racing every weekend and catching up with his schoolwork when he could, won the British Cadet Class championship.

In one respect it was the most important championship he has won, because it brought him to the attention of Ron Dennis, the owner of McLaren-Mercedes. The Woking-based team has supported his career ever since. Although the contract finishes at the end of this season, as Hamilton points out, throughout those 10 years McLaren have had the right to end the relationship at any time.

Hamilton is determined it will and he finds it hard to understand the attitude of some of his competitors in F3.

"They go wild, water-skiing, jet-skiing, and stuff like that, but I think I'm in too good a position," he says. "I've got too much to lose to mess it up now. I've come from a poor black family, I've had to work hard to give myself a shot.

There's no safety net. Don't get me wrong, others have had to work hard too, but I think I've got extra drive."

The sort of drive that helped him win both Euro F3 races at Monaco in May (the series has two races per meeting), staged before the grand prix, and with Dennis and the other F1 power-brokers watching. The first race Hamilton won easily.

Leading by two seconds, he touched a barrier overtaking a backmarker. "It was just a tap, but it bent in the wheel and wishbone a fraction, and the car was vibrating. I lost a second, but I reckoned I could hold on to the lead."

Although he did not want to risk the car over the kerbs from then on, Hamilton maintained line and speed to such effect that his ASM teammate Adrian Sutil chased too hard and went into the wall. It was a drive of real stature. If and when he secures the Euro F3 title, he believes he will be ready to move into F1. He would like to do so with McLaren -"They're perfectionists, determined to win, like me" -but is prepared to look elsewhere if necessary. The need to maintain his career momentum rules out a sideways move to a formula such as the new GP2 series.

America is an option. He shrugs off the fact that motor racing in the US is as dominated by white faces as it is here. "The way I see it, my colour is an advantage, in that it's something people talk about, but the bottom line is that it's clearly not why I'm in this position. I'm happy if other black kids see what I'm doing and realise it can be done, but that's not what motivates me; I'm doing it for me, because I want to win in F1 and because I believe I'm good enough to do that."

[itsnotaphasemomitsanobsession]

To all the tropes I've loved before

✨ Quality fic recs under the cut ✨

✨ If I could read only one trope for the rest of my life, it would be soulmate fic. A treasure of unfounded proportions ✨

Soulmate fics:

Vortex (T): TW: anxiety, brief mention of self harm, nonconsensual drug use (medical abuse in the form of over prescribing medicine). I've read this one several times because of how lovely I find it. The gentle love between Harry and Draco just does something to my cold dead heart. This fic has it all: Auror Harry, Down and out Draco, Teacher Draco, fluff, angst, and just the right amount of soulmate tomfoolery. Read also the authors part two of the fic: Riptide(M).

Everything a Word can Mean (T): Everyone is born with the nickname their soulmate uses for them tattooed on their body, Harry's just so happens to be something everyone calls him. I love this little fic so much, it's really sweet and fluffy and everything you need for a Saturday morning read!

Punch-drunk fingerprints (T): Cute and fluffy fic where if you touch your soulmate it leaves a mark on them. Draco just so happens to get pulled through a corridor with Harry tugging along.

Eighth year fics:

✨ These fics are either the sweetest most fluffiest fics or they are the most heart wrenching fics of all time and I love them with every fiber of my being ✨

Swish and flick (T): If there's one thing to know about me, it's that I LOVE roommate fics and this is a sweet one. Harry and Draco in this are really sweet and I feel like this fic needs to be on everyone's TBR right the frick now.

Inside Your Mind (E): TW: PTSD, use of sex as a coping mechanism (it does get better later), severe bullying. Coming back 8th year has been hard on Draco, but Greg is there to "help" by acting as bodyguard. Harry is pretty sure that's not really helping any. It's a sweet, sad and lovely fic that shows the love of friends and their willingness to keep you safe, but also how those friendships can blossom into something better and healthier. An absolutely beautiful fic and top notch smut if you partake!

Good Company (T): Such a sweet fic of Harry and Draco being friends in their 8th year. Harry feeling like the third wheel to Ron and Hermione falls into a friendship with Draco and Draco is just trying to get through the year. It's very very cute and I'm a big fan!

Lessons in Grace and Decorum (not rated): TW: power dynamic related consent problems, forced proximity, use of torture on purpose and on accident, self worth issues and depression. This is an oldie but a goodie, you will have to read it through a Google doc but it's really really good. Draco sees his dead mom and she gives him advice on how to make friends. It's sweet, sad as fuck and I've read it so many times I just have it permanently downloaded onto my phone.

Quiet (E): TW: implied sexual violence and abuse. Draco and Harry just vibe in the Slytherin common room and drink, gaze longingly at each other, maybe do some homework and play quidditch. There's also a cute little ficlet that is in the same story line, it's cute and it's ginny x pansy (big fan) so check out peripheral.

The In-betweens (T): Harry and Draco are roommates in 8th year. Surprisingly they get along pretty well, Draco sings dirty dancing in the shower and Harry likes it. I love this fic so much and I hope each and every one of you puts this on your TBR right this instant!!!!!

Job fics:

✨ Nothing better than older gay men finding love in what they do and also finding love in each other. Extra points if Harry isn't an Auror and Draco has an odd creative job ✨

The Snitch Maker (T): Draco makes snitches and Harry works for the Quidditch Union for the Administration and Betterment of the British League and its Endeavours. It's really cute and a little silly, Draco is very fun in this and Harry is an ex-auror with a disability. It's very sweet and worth the read

Chasing Shadows (E): TW: homophobia, death, and internalized homophobia. Draco works in a muggle bar and hasn't been in the wizard world for awhile, Harry works as an Auror and his next case is the death of Lucius Malfoy. Very very very good fic, features Harry coming to terms with his sexuality, an openly homosexual Draco and a series of fun OCS that make the fic very charming and worth the read.

Draco from the Wireless show (T): Very much a Welcome to Night Vale type of vibe. It's interesting and funny and just slightly odd which I love a whole lot. Draco in this is silly and a bit of a hermit and Harry is just trying to figure out why this town is so odd? I recommend this for days where you really need something silly to lift your spirits!

✨ please please please make sure you comment and leave kudos on the fics that you enjoy to let the authors know their worth!!!! ✨

[im-a-wonderling]

Speaking in Tongues ~ Harry Potter

You know, I don’t love Harry the way I do other characters from the series, but he is the main character, so I think he deserves some fanfic screentime 😂

Summary: Harry plays the third wheel and then makes two new friends.

Warnings: none

Word count: 2.4k

Harry leaned back in his chair, lifting his glasses to rub his eyes. 

He and Hermione had been working on Transfiguration homework for hours. Becoming Headmistress only steeled McGonagall’s high standards, and she didn’t give the trio grace for having been on the run for the better part of a year.

Harry sat back, stretching his neck. He turned his head just in time to see Ron creeping up from behind Hermione. When his best mate saw him, he pressed a finger to his lips. Then, acting quickly, Ron covered Hermione’s eyes.

She tensed up, letting out a little squeak of surprise.

Ron leaned his head down to say: “Guess who.”

At the sound of her boyfriend’s voice, a smile spread across Hermione’s face. “Mmmm…Neville?”

Ron smiled so fondly at her, it made Harry’s teeth hurt. “Guess again.”

“Seamus?”

“Nope.” 

“Hmmmmm…Dean?”

Ron snorted. “Now you’re just being mean.”

Hermione gave a small laugh and peeled away Ron’s hands. Harry averted his eyes as she twisted around to give Ron a kiss, focusing on the words in the textbook in front of him. “What’ve you been up to?”

“Quidditch tryouts.”

Harry forced himself to breathe as a stab of misery buried itself in between two of his ribs. He was thrilled for Ron, and he knew why he wasn’t allowed on a broomstick anymore. But that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt.

“Are you done studying?” Ron asked. 

“No,” Hermione said, and Harry looked up to see her turning back to her book. 

Ron let out a groan, resting his chin on the top of her head. “You’ve been studying all day. I think it’s your boyfriend’s turn for some attention.” Exasperated, Hermione set down her quill, which turned out to be quite the mistake, as Ron reached around her to shut her book. “Please?” Ron whined. “It’s almost Christmas.”

Hermione chuckled. “No, it’s almost midterms. Then it will be almost Christmas.”

Ron pressed his nose into her hair. “All I want for Christmas is you.” Hermione laughed, causing Ron to frown. “That wasn’t a joke.”

“No, I know.”

“Just come with me for an hour,” Ron wheedled. “We can go eat and come back.” Harry could see Hermione wavering. Ron leaned in, lowering his voice. “We can go to Hogsmeade and have tea at Madam Puddifoot's.”

Harry knew by the gleam in Hermione’s eye that Ron had picked his words well.

“I guess it couldn’t hurt to take a little break.” 

Hermione’s stuff was packed and her hand was in Ron’s in about ten seconds. The couple bid Harry goodbye, and he shook his head, smiling, as he watched them go. 

He liked seeing the two of them happy together. In fact, his favorite part of returning to Hogwarts for his seventh year had to be seeing the people. Even now, as he looked around the library, he spotted many people he recognized from his first six years here. 

Eloise Midgen scribbled frantically with one hand and kept her place in her book with the other. Even Ron, who’d always made fun of her acne, admitted that her face had cleared quite a bit. Her tablemate, Romilda Vane, stared dreamily out the nearest window, chin propped on the heel of her hand. Harry could only hope she wasn’t cooking up plans to sneak him another love potion. 

Hannah Abbott sat with Neville at a table against the wall. Judging by the pictures in their open textbooks, they were working on Care of Magical Creatures. She was one of many from Harry and Neville’s year that had come to complete her final year at Hogwarts.

Staring at his textbook with the end of his quill in his mouth, Justin Finch-Fletchley had parked himself at the table closest to the library entrance. Harry still felt bad about what happened in their second year, but Justin didn’t seem to care anymore.

Harry couldn’t get tired of looking around at all the people who, however close or distant, always had a part in his life at Hogwarts.

When he sat like every other student, pouring over his homework, it almost felt the way it had before Voldemort had taken over the wizarding world. 

A dull pain abruptly radiated through Harry’s chest, and he jerked, dropping his quill to roughly rub at it, trying to breathe deeply. 

His scar no longer hurt, but he hadn’t returned from the dead completely unscathed. The first time pangs of discomfort rang through his chest, he thought he was having a heart attack. When he’d gone to the hospital wing, Madame Pomfrey quickly dispelled that theory while simultaneously forbidding him to partake in any physical activity.

It was Headmistress McGonagall who’d suggested it had something to do with his magical resuscitation. 

Harry agreed. If he were to imagine a pain where the heart itself seemed to forget that it was still beating, this is what it would feel like. 

Harry didn’t know what hurt more: the pain itself or being indefinitely taken off the Quidditch team. 

Another pang shot through him, and Harry let out a pained hiss through his teeth.

HassAyaeehHathehhSsaah.

Harry’s head jerked up, immediately scanning his surroundings. His heart raced in his chest as many memories floated through his head at once. 

A Brazilian snake in a zoo exhibit and vanishing glass.

Draco conjuring a snake during a duel with Lockhart’s dueling club.

SassaythaAyaeeh HassAyaeehHathehhSsaah.

He whipped his head around to look behind him, and there it was. 

A bright green snake, one Harry recognized as a viper, was coiled in the corner behind him. It couldn’t have been longer than a foot long in length, which must’ve been why Harry hadn’t noticed it before, despite its vivid hue. 

Tom Riddle, egging on the Basilisk with that eldritch language of hissing and spitting to kill Harry in the Chamber of Secrets.

A vision of Nagini, biting and almost killing Arthur Weasley.

Harry eyed it warily, all those memories fighting for his attention. With his attention upon it, the snake didn’t say anything or move. 

Was the snake scared of him?

He cocked his head. SeethaaaSsssHathehhHathehhAyaehh, he said quietly. 

The snake twitched at his greeting, coiling tighter. 

SeethaaaSsssHathehhHathehhAyaehh, it echoed after a moment, it’s tight coil loosening a bit. SsssaythaHaaHassaySsss?

Harry nodded. Tentatively, he reached his left hand down to rest near his foot, careful not to reach in the snake’s direction at all. Aayaa Haassssehhh HatheeeyHaaHasseeyssssehhh. 

The snake didn’t move for a long time, but Harry stayed patiently still. Eventually, its head lifted up, rising a few inches into the air. He could tell it was sniffing the air, possibly looking for danger. 

Apparently finding none, the snake slithered forward, reaching Harry’s hand and sliding into it. Its scales were frigid against his skin and much rougher than he’d anticipated. Being very careful and moving very slow, Harry lifted the snake up, resting the back of his hand on the table. 

Aayaa Haassssehhh SsssHathehhSsssHaaSeyythaaAyaeehHasseey. 

The snake’s name was Eleanor. Definitely a human-given name. She must’ve belonged to a student at the school, most likely a Slytherin, for obvious reasons. 

Aayaa Haassssehhh SeethaaaHaaHasseeyHasseeyHaaaaaah. 

The snake didn’t respond. Harry’s eyes drifted back to the parchment and textbooks in front of him. HatheeeyAyaeehHasseeyAyaahath, he hissed, gesturing to them. 

AyaeehAyaahath. 

Harry picked up his quill and resumed writing. 

Eleanor didn’t move much—due to contentment or fear, Harry didn’t know. She didn’t say anything either, but despite the silence, it was nice to have her there, even if he had to set his quill down every time he turned a page of his book. 

At one point, when Harry was flipping through Transfigurations for the Advanced Wizard, Eleanor gently curved her tail around his thumb, bringing a smile to his face. 

Harry spotted a Hufflepuff first-year working his way towards them, and he casually lifted up his textbook, shielding Eleanor from view. 

The wizarding world never held much esteem for snakes, and he vividly remembered how everyone had reacted upon finding out he could communicate with them. Eleanor didn’t deserve that. 

The Hufflepuff preoccupied himself with reading the titles of the book on the third shelf, running his finger down the names. He glanced at Harry, did a double take, and then quickly lowered his head. 

Harry sighed inwardly. 

The Battle of Hogwarts only cemented his status as a celebrity, and every time he forgot that, he was harshly reminded.

Eventually, the Hufflepuff found what he was looking for and left, and Harry let his book rest on the table again. 

He was nearly finished with his essay when a Ravenclaw student came around the corner. Harry lifted his book again, expecting that she would find a book and then leave. But unlike the Hufflepuff, she wasn’t looking at the books or the shelves, and she definitely hadn’t noticed Harry. Instead, her attention scurried across the floor. “Where are you?” she whispered. 

The snake in Harry’s hand perked up. HassayHasseeyAayaaSsssSeyythaaSsaah. 

Harry gingerly laid down the book, exposing the viper. “Are you looking for Eleanor?” he said. 

The Ravenclaw’s eyes shot to Harry’s face, and then down to the snake in his hand. She sighed with relief, rushing forward, holding out her hand. “Eleanor,” she said, her hand brushing against Harry’s with such electricity, he could’ve sworn she’d cast the Lightning Charm. “You found her!”

The snake quickly slithered into her hand, immediately curling around her ring finger and big thumb. 

“I’ve been looking all over for you,” the Ravenclaw scolded. “This is why you’re not supposed to go off on your own, because then I have a heart attack when I can’t find you!”

The snake hid its head underneath its long belly. HatheeeyHaaSsssaytha HassEsseythaHasseeyAayaaAyaeehEsseythaSsssaytha. 

“She was curious,” Harry said awkwardly. 

The Ravenclaw blinked, tilting her head at him. “What?”

Harry felt himself start to sweat under her piercing gaze. He gestured towards the viper. “She was…she said she was curious.”

The Ravenclaw’s eyes roved over his face, lifting to his forehead where they stayed for a few moments before falling back to his eyes. “So it’s true. You can speak Parseltongue.” 

“Umm…yeah.” Harry’s body grew hotter, a flush of embarrassment boiling him from the inside out. He scratched his neck, wishing the Ravenclaw would stop staring so intently. 

The girl sat down in Hermione’s abandoned seat, scooting it forward so she was closer to Harry. “Teach me.”

“What?” he asked, the word tumbling out of his mouth. 

“Teach me how to speak parseltongue.” She said it so matter-of-factly, like it was something that could be expected to come out of some stranger’s mouth. 

“Uhhhh.” Harry blinked a few times, trying to regain his cognitive ability. “I didn’t ever really learn it, I just…knew it.”

The girl huffed, blowing her hair out of her face. “Well, that shouldn’t stop us. Besides, I heard all about Dumbledore’s Army. You taught upwards of thirty students Defense Against the Dark Arts, so teaching parseltongue to one person should be a breeze.”

“But I-I was, I was taught Defense Against the Dark Arts,” Harry stammered. He couldn’t stop himself from pushing his glasses farther up his nose, a nervous tick he’d developed whenever someone praised him. “I couldn’t even tell you the first thing about translation and what words mean.”

“So it’ll be learning by immersion. You’ll speak it, and I’ll pick up as much as I can. Isn’t that how children learn to speak, by listening to the adults around them and figuring things out?”

Harry fingered the frayed edge of his transfiguration textbook. “I guess so.” 

“Perfect! How does tomorrow work?”

Alarm filled Harry. “Wait, I didn’t–”

“We’ll meet here after lunch. I’ll bring Eleanor.” The Ravenclaw got to her feet. “See you tomorrow!” She strode towards the library exit. 

“Wait!” Harry called as loudly as he dared. 

Madam Pince’s neck jerked around towards him, glaring at his use of volume around her precious tomes. The Ravenclaw girl didn’t look back. She continued at her breakneck walking speed, adjusting the strap of her school bag as she went, leaving Harry gaping. 

He debated calling her again, but he suddenly realized this girl had never told him her name. 

Leaping to his feet, he shoved his books, quills, and parchment into his bag. He started after her, the tempo of his heart speeding up. Harry kept his eyes on the back of the Ravenclaw girl’s head, weaving through the tables of students working and bookshelves.

He’d almost caught up with her when Neville rounded a corner, right into the girl’s path. Harry couldn’t see the girl’s expression, but Neville smiled brightly, raising his fist.

Harry slowed to see what would happen.

The girl, without breaking her stride, bumped her fist against Neville’s.

Harry came to a stop in front of Neville, just as the Ravenclaw walked through the library doors.

“Neville,” Harry said breathlessly, pressing his hand against the dull ache once more radiating from his heart, “who was that?”

“Her?” Neville asked, jerking his thumb over his shoulder. Harry nodded. “That’s Y/F/N Y/L/N.” 

Harry would’ve made some noise of surprise if he’d had enough breath. 

Y/F/N Y/L/N.

He knew the name, but he’d never seen the face.

Rowena Ravenclaw wanted intelligent, curious, wise, and motivated students, and by all accounts, Y/N fit the bill. 

According to her fellow Ravenclaws, she hardly ever went to class and somehow still aced all exams, ridding all other students of a curve. If the gossip was to be believed, she was never in the same place. One day, she might be peppering the ghosts with questions about what it felt like to be undead, the next she would be swimming through the Great Lake with the intent to communicate with the underwater creatures. 

“Are you guys friends?” Harry asked. With the way Neville looked at her, he would’ve asked if they were more than friends, except everyone knew Neville only had eyes for Hannah Abbott. 

“She would need an interview with some high-end psychologist before she found a definition of friendship she was happy with.” Neville chuckled. “She tutors me in potions in exchange for me growing some dangerous and endangered plants for potions ingredients.”

“Potions ingredients?” Harry echoed. “For what kind of potions?”

“I never ask.” Neville gave Harry a meaningful look before meandering back to his table with Hannah Abbott. 

“Huh,” Harry said to himself, looking the direction Y/N had gone. “That’s kind of brilliant.”

-

Part 2

Curious as to what is being said in parseltongue? Click here for the resource I used to write it. 

Like this? Go check out my masterlist for more!

Overall taglist:

@thelastpyle @valiantlytransparentwhispers​

[justpopi]

Sweet Sixteen

“So…”

The catatonic silence that accompanied the pair on their way back from the Three Broomsticks was broken by Theodore 'please, call me Theo' Nott, who during the last few months has upgraded in Harry’s mind from 'should I even know who you are?' to 'my dearest comrade in peace and war'.

Peace being, for example, those calm and quiet study nights (Harry still can’t quite believe he would come to miss those, but they say war changes a man) spent together preparing for their NEWTs, courtesy of a surprisingly welcomed 8th year.

War being whatever the hell they had just witnessed (and in Harry’s humble opinion, survived) in Hogsmeade’s most beloved bar, a place that had been a sanctuary of good memories for The-Boy-Who-Lived-Twice until today, now forever corrupted by a traumatizing experience (has he not suffered enough?)

“Are we going to talk about what just happened or is this the type of situation in which all parties involved reach a common consensus of never mentioning this… quarrel again?” Theo continued in his ever-present, eloquent speech, a note of amusement hiding in his voice.

“I would hardly qualify THAT as a quarrel” Harry grunted. “In fact, and I cannot stretch this enough, I’d rather challenge Moldyshorts to a wet willy contest than go through that again, and I think we both remember how his fingers looked like”

“It’s endearing how dramatic you’re being, Harry, and while I have absolutely not idea what a wheat whiny contest is or why it would involve the Dark Lord’s fingers, comparing a lovers’ quarrel to a challenge against what is literally a failed crossbreed experiment of a snake and my sleep paralysis demon seems hardly fair to-“

“To Voldemort!”

“-to our friends” finished Theo, completely ignoring Harry’s interruption. Risking a sideways glance towards his grumpy companion, the Nott heir added “and don’t frown, Harry darling, it’s completely unbecoming of someone from your station, not to mention it will make your baby face age early”

“If anything will make me age early, are those two”, Harry pouted, while trying to hide a blush at Theo’s use of 'darling'. “I feel like I lost 10 years of my life watching the ferret and Hermione bickering. Never mind that there were six times in which I thought I was going to die, Theo. SIX. TIMES!!”

“I counted four”

“Still four times too many!!” yelled Harry, exasperated. “And the other two were for the two times 'Mione made me go with her to the bathroom. At least her asking me to chaperone this date should pay for all the life debts I owe her for saving my arse”

Carefully, as to not sound like a condescending idiot, Theo asked “Don’t you think that maybe, just maybe, you are exaggerating a little bit this whole situation because it’s Draco? I remember how Granger and Weasley used to argue, and it was a lot worse, and they weren’t even a couple”

“I’m not- They weren’t- It wasn’t- okay, I’ll concede that point. But for the record, I never saw Ron and Hermione fighting over the things that she and Malfoy were fighting over today”

“It wasn’t that bad, it’s just that they are two people with their own strong and unique set of beliefs and opinions that, unfortunately, happen to differ from time to time”

“Theo, I don’t know if you were astral projecting during their whole date -and if you did, please teach me- but they spent 17 minutes arguing over which multiple of 4 was the best and why theirs was the superior one”

“You really need to learn the art of thriving amongst chaos, Harry. Granger using the Bertie Bott’s beans that we bought at Honeydukes to show Draco that 24 was better than his 'miserable, meek 12' and then proceeding to shove them in his mouth was the most fun I’ve experienced in a while”

“You and I have a very different concept of fun” said Harry under his breath. “Anyways, at least you were there, I don’t want to imagine how it would have gone had I been third wheeling, so, er… thank you, for agreeing to come with me”

“Anytime, Harry darling”. And anytime indeed, thought Theo, when he was graced with the beaming smile Harry gave him as a thanks.

Finally reaching Hogwarts’ gates, they came to a stop, letting the soft fall of snow wash over them. Gently, as to not disturb their peaceful bubble, Theo reached for Harry’s nose to dry the water left by a melting snowflake, reveling at the blush on the other’s cheeks which was ignited by the action.

“Harry, was today really that bad?” Theo asked tentatively, hoping that their friends’ bickering hadn’t totally ruined what he considered their first 'kind of a double date but not really'. Though the events from the afternoon would probably keep the bar low for when Theo gathered the courage to ask Harry on a 'most certainly a date'. And his housemates say he is a pessimist.

Harry sighed, and then gave Theo a small but sincere smile. “I know I complained a lot on our way back, and you know I get emotional recoil from these type of situations, but no, Theo. Today wasn’t really that bad”

Theo returned the smile. “I’m glad, because though Draco and Granger provided high quality entertainment at their own expense, which is always valued, it was your company what I truly enjoyed”

Harry’s smiled widened a bit at that, and feeling confident from Theo’s words, he gathered his Gryffindor courage. “Well, in that case, maybe it would be even better if next Hogsmeade’s weekend we repeated this, just, emm, the two of us?” he asked in a shy yet hopeful tone.

Theo, in all his Slytherin glory, smirked despite the furious blush that was taking over his face. “I would love to, Harry darling, but first I have to ask you a most important prerogative that I fear must be answered before I take that level of commitment with you”

Harry looked at him dubiously “And what would that be?”

Theo grinned a shark-like smile “What is the best multiple of 4?”

Harry let out a bark of laughter “My, my Theo, I’ll show you mine if you show me yours”

“At the same time, together?”

“Together, at the count of three”

“One”

The sunset painted the surrounding snow in warm shades of orange and pink, as if the landscape itself wanted to rival the blushes adorning their faces.

“Two”

Blue eyes met green ones in that way only seen in the kind of couples which have either shared a soul, a life, or both, mirth reflected in each of their orbs as if they were the only ones in knowledge of the world’s biggest mysteries.

“Three”

Two boys trying to hold their laughter until the last second, not a single worry in their minds, as both know that this moment is the beginning of something incredibly strong yet irremediably sweet.

“SIXTEEN!”

[posswrites]

When the end of October rolled around, Harry and Hermione had been spending most of their evenings in the Room of Requirement, which Hermione confirmed by their location on the map when they left, sneaking to the fifth floor after everyone had gone. Hermione frequently complained about how useful this room would’ve been when she had the time turner, because it would have been great for doing homework. Harry did feel bad because he still hadn’t told Ron about the room at all. He knew he’d have to, and he’d been meaning to, the right opportunity had just never come up. He’d wanted to wait for a time when no one was around, which was rare, and he couldn’t just blurt it out, so he was waiting for relevant conversation, which was nearly impossible. He could just see it now - “yeah, Hermione and I have been spending our nights in a secret room that I haven’t told you about because it’s great to be alone”.

But it felt weird to be there without him. For years, it had always been the three of them - the trio . And as much as he loved spending alone time with Hermione, this felt like a weird sort of betrayal to be here without him. Not that he’d have a good time just spending his nights studying, but he had to be careful about this sort of thing. Ron had joked about being their third wheel over the summer, and Harry had promised him he didn’t have to worry about it. With Hermione’s head resting on his shoulder from where she’d fallen asleep in the middle of studying, though, it was beginning to feel like Ron had a point.

Full chapter on AO3 -> Patreon (access to drabbles, early chapters, and drafts) -> Possum Hollow Discord (chapters posted a day early) ->