#rocky iv spoilers

[theshippirate22]

so i started a fic for this a while ago and it got lost in my wips but then @henderdads posted this and i got right back on my bullshit to finish it! also on ao3 tw: panic attack

November 1985-

Steve had a white-knuckle grip on the steering wheel of the Beemer while he stared out at the theater ahead of him.

Just looking at it, just thinking about what he was about to do, made his skin crawl. He felt guilty and dirty and miserable, but he didn’t really have any other choice. 

Okay, that was a lie. There were definitely a million other things he could be doing. He really needed to clean his room, he was falling desperately behind on movies Robin said he needed to see, and he was supposed to be writing an essay to help him get into Ohio State. There were tapes to be listened to, people to check on, God, his car needed an oil change.

But here he was, anyway, neglecting all of it. 

The dashboard clock switched to 11:35 and his stomach burned. He’d gotten himself so freaked out, he was going to throw up in the gutter and drive home before anything even happened. The only thing that stopped him was the thought of what waited for him. The dark, cold, empty house, his relentless nightmares, and his sleepless night.

11:40. His hands were getting cold against the wheel, but he still didn’t will himself into the warm oasis that was the theater. Not yet. He still had time. 

He felt like an addict, lying to his friends and family before relapsing back into heroin. He knew it wasn’t like that, that if they knew, all he’d get was funny looks and maybe a snarky comment directed at his intelligence (or lack thereof), but that didn’t make it any better. He still hated himself. 

He’d promised to give this up a long time ago, to abandon the lifestyle entirely. Actually, he had turned into something of a doormat at this point- always driving the kids places and covering any of Robin’s shifts when she bailed and offering his house and money up to whoever took advantage of it- because anything he did that didn’t help somebody else felt selfish. He wasn’t allowed to be selfish anymore. He had to repent for when he was selfish.

11:45. Steve groaned softly and got out of the car, attacked by the cold air as it seemed to soak through his sweatshirt. 

Way to put the guilt into guilty pleasure, moron, he thought to himself, pushing through the doors to the theater. His inner monologue was starting to sound more and more condescending. 

The teenager at the counter glared up at him through her eyelashes, popping a bubble with her gum decisively, clearly annoyed to be running midnight showings at a shitty theater. He slid a five-dollar bill across the counter to her and took a deep breath before forcing out the words.

“Rocky IV, please.”

She looked at him like he was stupid, and he was about ready to run back to his car and pretend none of this had ever happened. This was just another stupid nightmare to haunt him while he tried to sleep. 

She handed him a ticket, the bright red DRAGO VS. BALBOA staring up at him-mocking him really- and passed over his change without saying anything at all. 

Okay, that was the hard part. That was the part that made him interact with someone, a live actual person, made him admit his sin out loud, make it real and out there.

As soon as the ticket was in his hand and he was walking to the specified theater, he could breathe again. The guilt still writhed heavily in his stomach, but he could fight down the nausea enough to function. Half his brain, the half that had been in control for a good while now, was screaming at him that this was wrong, he was sick and twisted for wanting this, while the other half kept reminding him softly that it was just a movie. No one had to know about it. It would help him tonight- maybe he could get some sleep when he got home- and then it could disappear forever, and he would never think of it again. 

It’s just a movie. 

Steve was ten when the original came out. His dad had paid for him and Tommy H. to go one Saturday and God, they loved it. They’d gotten in a playfight in the parking lot waiting for Tommy’s mom to pick them up, mimicking the final match between Rocky and Apollo (Steve was Apollo every time they played; Tommy refused to be anything less than the hero, even if technically he was the loser) and Tommy had accidentally knocked him in the face and made his nose bleed. That might’ve been one of the best days of Steve’s childhood if he thought about it.

Three years later, he and Tommy went back and saw Rocky II the first night it was out, and watching Rocky win lit something in Steve on fire, and he convinced himself he could do anything, like how Rocky could still get up even when Apollo had beat him to shit. 

Steve got into his first fistfight that summer. He lost, because he had never actually fought before, and his punches were loose and messy, but he didn’t even care, staring up at Jack Donahue through a black eye, because Rocky lost his first fight against Apollo, but he won the second, so next time Steve would win. 

He went to Rocky III on a date in 1982 (still waiting to win that second fight, although now it was really Fight 8 or 9 because he’d gotten his ass kicked a good number of times since Jack Donahue). The girl he was with got bored halfway through the movie, climbed into his lap and convinced him to make out instead, but he kept getting distracted by Clubber Lang, and Apollo’s training advice, and Rocky and Andrian’s big house and their happy family, glancing over her shoulder absently as she trailed her mouth up his neck. There wasn’t a second date with her. He didn’t even remember her name. 

He remembered what color dress Adrian wore to the final fight, though. 

He hadn’t watched any of them since September of ‘84 when he’d rented all of them and binge-watched them one night, mostly to remind himself that Billy Hargrove was just a watered-down Clubber Lang who came to steal his title and insult his (nonexistent) wife and mess up his life. Rocky beat Clubber Lang. Steve would beat Billy.

Within the next few weeks, however, Billy ended up on the ever-growing list of people who had whipped Steve, his Heavyweight-Champion-Of-the-World belt that manifested itself as King Steve of Hawkins High was stripped from him, and he’d started his proverbial pilgrimage to salvation. 

He didn’t get to like Rocky anymore. King Steve liked Rocky. Just Steve didn’t have any reason for that luxury. Rocky was athletic, and mindless, and masculine, everything that everyone hated about King Steve, so Just Steve didn’t get it anymore. 

It’s just a fucking movie. He reminded himself. No one has to know.

They had unfinished business anyway, Rocky and him. Maybe it was fate, or some shit that IV should come out like five months after Steve did get his first win against the Russian soldier.

Hey, old friend. I did it. I won. I got back up. I won. 

We won, Rocky. 

Steve hid in the back of the theater, in the dark, where no one would recognize him. There were only maybe a dozen other people in there anyway, but in the dark, he could relax. 

He almost felt safe, even, when the opening montage started. There was something so familiar about it, like returning to the house you lived in as a child, but the same sort of estrangement from time. Watching Rocky best Clubber again, knowing Rocky would win, was such a comfortable thing. God, these movies were so good. 

He almost didn’t feel like such an asshole anymore. 

Rocky was a dad now, you know. Had been since the second one technically, but only now was the kid old enough to have a personality. Watching him with his son was maybe when the six-nugget thing really solidified for Steve. He wanted that, he wanted the house and the kid and sparring with Apollo-the friend who knew- and Adrian. 

God, he wanted someone to love him the way Adrian loved.

She was always just there, in the very best sort of way. As if at any moment, Rocky could look over and she would be there, grinning at him, helping him back up, fixing things. And she would shake her head and laugh at her moronic boxer husband and still sing with him when he started up out of tune and flush when he flirted with her. 

The reminder of the slump in Steve’s love life manifested itself as a sort of sad aching in his stomach. He redirected his attention out of his thoughts and back to the movie. 

The plot was a little mindless; he’d admit it. It was basically the same premise as the last one: Some Big-Bad-Boxer popping up out of nowhere to whip Rocky’s ass just enough in the first half to build a vague sense of suspense as to whether he was going to win the final fight or not, but the only difference now was that he was sparring against Communism or something as a metaphor for the mini-Red Scare happening. 

Steve didn’t mind. He knew enough Russians to be pretty psyched about Stallone wailing on them for a few hours. 

It’s Apollo Creed, however, who first takes his place across the ring from Ivan Drago. Steve was fine. He was well aware of the fact that whatever happened during this fight would mean absolutely nothing in comparison to whatever happens at the end, except maybe deciding the intensity of the training montage (That was the other thing; Survivor was doing a bunch of the music, how could Steve miss out on that?)

Apollo put on a show, with dancers and lights and that stupid flag robe he’d had in the first one, so this would be good. Mediocre writing, good entertainment. 

“You will lose,” Drago growled. 

They danced around each other in the ring. Apollo threw a good number of jabs in the beginning. It felt good. Steve almost smiled. 

But something happened when Drago started fighting back. Apollo stumbled against the ropes, dripping sweat; Rocky yelled something. Steve missed it- he could feel his pulse throbbing in his ears, suddenly a little too aware of his clothes and where they clung to him. 

Drago kept fighting. He punched and punched, each one landing hard and solid against Apollo, against flesh, in a rapid thunk, thunk, thunk. 

Steve’s hands started to shake. 

Apollo leaned back against the corner post as the bell rings-end of the first round- looking dazed and far away. 

Rocky begged. “I gotta stop you. This fight’s finished.”

Apollo’s answer thudded through Steve’s head. “Promise you won’t stop this fight. You don’t stop this fight.”

Bell. Second round. Apollo looked stoned, tripping over his own feet as he tried to dance. Steve knew the feeling. Then Drago had him in a corner and it won’t stop, fists pounding against him again and again. Sweat flew off Apollo’s head and fell against the mat like rain. He doesn’t go down. 

There was so much blood. Steve couldn’t breathe. He felt the adrenaline in his sweaty, trembling hands, but it wasn’t right. It wasn’t movie excitement, it felt real. 

Apollo fell back against the ropes, their support being his only saving grace. His wife screamed from the audience “Stop the fight!” but they won’t, the Russian won’t stop, the fight is still going. 

Steve must have started hallucinating. For a moment, all he could hear was his own breath, exhausted and wheezy with pain. 

“Scoops... I... I work... Scoops...”

Robin is screaming, sobbing, wailing, voice pounding through his aching head. “Stop it! Stop hurting him!”

A final blow to the jaw. Apollo swung backwards toward the horrified faces of the audience, then lunged forward in depletion. There was blood in his teeth and on his face and staining the white rags and his eye was swollen shut. And the Russian’s wife smiled. 

The doctor grinned, white teeth glimmering against the dark beard. He demands something in Russian, and Steve doesn’t understand, but he wants to, he wants to make it go away. 

The soldier leans in a final time, delivering a solid blow to his temple. 

Steve’s sight fizzles in and out like a kaleidoscope as he falls.

His head hits the concrete floor, and he feels it, the burning pain at the back of his head, seeping up through his brain until his sight goes black. 

Apollo was on the floor. His body seized with fatigue and Rocky grabbed him, cradling him in his lap, and he was screaming, crying out for something, and the Russian was still talking but all that gets through to Steve is the grating accent and the fear. 

“What did you do to him?!” Robin screams, pulling his weak body towards her with bound hands. “Steve, wake up! Steve, oh my God, wake up, Steve!”

It felt like someone had shoved cotton in his ears. He couldn’t hear anything but his own pulse and his own breath, but somehow, Drago’s last couple words made it through.

“If he dies, he dies.” 

Steve got to his feet before he realized he was doing it. His legs were moving, and he wasn’t telling them where to go, but they knew somehow. All he was aware of was the nausea sweeping through him like a tidal wave and the trembling, paranoid fear taking over his entire body. 

“Who do you work for?!”

“Scoops Ahoy. The ice cream place.”

Thud. His face burned. 

“Who do you work for?!”

“Scoops!”

His head flew to the side, pulling something in his neck and shooting white-hot pain down his spine. 

“Hit him again.”

Steve collapsed against the bathroom floor. He didn’t even have it in him to make it to a stall and lock himself in; he just melted there against the wall. 

Sweat dripped down his forehead and his back, drenching him. He couldn’t breathe; his sweatshirt was too tight around his throat and his jeans were touching too much of his thighs and he couldn’t get his chest to move. 

Every muscle in his body was too tight to move. Maybe he was having a seizure or a heart attack, but it didn’t even matter, because his head ached around a phantom black eye and a scar on his temple that had taken much too long to heal. His eyes felt massive and dry, like if he didn’t get air soon, they were going to pop out of his head. 

He knew he needed to breathe, get the air in and out in a timely manner, but every time he tried to open his mouth, he would just wheeze out “Scoops,” or “Robin!” 

The Russians killed Apollo. He was laying on the floor next to him and Robin, in those stupid Americano shorts that were the same color as Steve’s uniform, and Steve knows they’re coming for him next. He played Apollo with Tommy; he is Apollo and he’s about to receive the same fate. 

He watched the door to the bathroom in terror like Dolph Lundgren was going to storm through at any moment to try and fight him next. Steve couldn’t win. He wouldn’t win. Not against a Russian, not against Drago. 

They were going to kill him. Drago was coming, and as soon as he found him, he was going to beat him to death just like Apollo. 

Maybe Steve was sobbing. That would explain the burning in his throat and the noise making his head throb. He couldn’t stop it though; he couldn’t seem to control anything except to pull his knees to his chest and curl in on himself to try and protect his head and his ribs. 

He didn’t know how long he sat there, suffocating, shaking, anxious hands tearing through the hair at the back of his head, partially to cover his neck, partially to pull at the roots of his hair until he felt something other than fear. Eventually, he stopped crying, the tears were gone, but he still couldn’t breathe, and his whole face felt clogged up with whatever was left of his sobs. 

That only made him panic more, realizing he wasn’t getting any air, and his hands moved down his neck to claw away at his throat and open something up. His nails were dull and harsh, tearing up the skin as he pawed at his Adam’s apple, hyperventilating so loudly, it filled up all his senses so that was all he could hear for a good long while.

“Hey... You alright?” 

The voice felt far away and soft like it was spoken by someone who had never experienced the harshness of sensation. God? Steve thought stupidly, carefully acknowledging that to be the first thought he’d had in a long while that wasn’t about his own demise via Russian cruelty. 

“Harrington. Can you hear me?”

Steve forced his head up, pupils blown wide with adrenaline, glancing skittishly from wall to wall, trying to remember where he was. 

“Right here. You’re okay. Try and breathe for me, Harrington.”

Steve’s shallow breaths continued, hands trailing back up to pull his hair again. He didn’t get there, however, because warm hands clamped softly around his wrists and pulled them away. “Careful. Don’t hurt yourself, honey.”

Steve could see his hands, when he moved his fingers a little bit so he could comprehend that they were his, then followed up the foreign hands- now gripping higher up on his forearm to keep him from falling backward- along pale arms and black sleeves, then up along the corner of a tattoo peeking from underneath the collar of the shirt. Higher up, face-to-face with him, although he hadn’t actually seen it until now, was a tangle of messy curly hair and choppy bangs framing the darkest brown eyes he’d ever seen.

“Adrian?” He choked out. Relief surged through him at the recognition, despite the nagging at the back of his mind that that actually couldn’t be Adrian, because Adrian was here with him, and she was gonna take care of him and fix things like she did for Rocky. “Adrian...”

“Sure.” She mumbled. “Deep breaths, Harrington. Like you’re swimming.” She took a few exaggerated deep breaths for him to mirror, and he nodded weakly, trying to force his lungs to expand entirely. 

For a few seconds-or minutes; time really had no meaning for Steve anymore- this went on, Adrian taking one breath and Steve copying until he could do it on his own. She loosened her grip on his arms, eventually dropping them completely. “There you go. Feeling okay?”

Steve hesitated while he assessed. His scalp burned from tugging on his hair, and he was sure he’d scratched his throat up pretty bad, but his hands weren’t shaking nearly as much as they had been a minute ago, and he could unclench his jaw finally- he hadn’t realized it had been so tight; the tension was probably the root cause of the headache- so yeah, he decided. “Better.”

“You ever had a panic attack before?”

He shook his head, choosing not to speak again because of the pathetic gravelly sound of his voice and blinking quickly to fight off the next wave of tears- exhausted ones this time.

“Pretty scary, huh? But it’s okay, it’s not forever. It always goes away. You’re safe, okay?”

He nodded weakly, gazing off over her shoulder to be sure the Russians weren’t coming. God, he was going to have to protect her if Drago came. He could fight, he could protect her...

“You aren’t quite back, are you, Harrington?”

Steve startled, darting his glance back toward her. “My...” He choked out, frustrated that his voice didn’t sound right yet; still too wet and broken to be his own. “My name is Steve.”

Adrian chuckled softly. “Yeah. Yeah, I know who you are, Steve. I’m glad you know.” She brushed a stray piece of hair from his eyes. “Can you tell me where we are?”

“Bathroom,” Steve mumbled. “Starcourt.”

“Starcourt? Like the mall? No, it burned down months ago. Remember?”

Steve swallowed hard, staring at the tile. It wasn’t like Starcourt’s- instead of red, green, and orange, this was green, blue, and black. It wasn’t Starcourt. Starcourt was over. Gone. He took a deep breath. “ShowTimez. Theater.”

“Hey, there you go.” She shifted her knees out from under her- it was painful to kneel for so long- and settled cross-legged across from him. “Do you... do you know who I am?”

“Adrian,” Steve whispered quickly. 

Her eyebrows shot up in surprise, almost disappearing under dark bangs. “Like from the movie? Gee, thanks, Harrington, you know how to woo a guy.” She tore her sight away, almost blushing, and continued self-consciously. “Not quite. You... you probably don’t know who I am. I wouldn’t be surprised.”

Steve felt bad for getting it wrong. And if it wasn’t Adrian... who cared enough to be so gentle with him? Panic started to fill up inside him again. Who had caught him? Who knew he was here, worse, who had seen him crying? He looked back up, trying to reassess, figure out the right answer. 

Upon better inspection, it very much wasn’t Adrian. Besides the hair and the eyes, they didn’t look at all similar. Actually, it was a man, which should’ve been his first assumption given that he was on the floor of the men’s bathroom, but he also forgot his own name for a second there, so he would let it go. He had thick, steel rings that Steve couldn’t coherently recognize into any shapes yet, and tattoos on his arms that Steve hadn’t noticed in his first sweep either. But the face was familiar. Tommy had hated him, loved to pick on him in high school. Maybe Steve had had gym with him junior year. But really, Steve knew him because he was always in the background of whatever place he was driving Dustin to. The party joined Hellfire in September; Steve had been seeing this guy vaguely for months. The name was slow coming to him- everything felt lagged- but eventually, he managed, “Munson. Eddie.”

He grinned. “Yeah! See, I knew I wasn’t that forgettable. Go ahead and call me Talia Shire though, that’s the best name I’ve been called in a while.”

The corners of Steve’s mouth twitched. Maybe it wasn’t Adrian, who he knew he could trust- She's not real, moron, he reminded quickly- but Eddie was harmless. Dustin talked about the guy so much, it was like Steve already knew him anyway. 

God, Dustin. What if Eddie told Hellfire and the kids found out he’d been here, and worse, that he’d freaked out? He didn’t know if he could handle it if the kids ever found out he wasn’t as strong as he pretended.

“You can’t tell Dustin.” Steve blurted out. 

“What?”

“He can’t know I was here, that I was...” He struggled for the words.

Eddie nodded softly. “Yeah. Okay. I won’t tell him.” He lowered his voice as he said it like it was already a secret. “What the little shit doesn’t know won’t hurt him.”

Steve nodded haphazardly to communicate that he agreed, but he just felt like he looked stupid.

“Hey, uh, do me a favor, and don’t tell the kids you saw me here, either, actually.” Eddie continued. “It goes against my code and everything to watch...” He trailed off, suddenly aware of his audience and needing to watch himself.

“Sports movies.” Steve finished. Eddie grimaced, so he added, “Yeah, no, I get it.”

Eddie nodded, forcing a smile, but it was still tainted with guilt like he’d said something wrong.

Steve was quick to stifle the awkwardness. “How come Rocky makes the cut then?”

“Oh, I don’t really know.” His shoulders relaxed a little and he admitted, “I rented the first one on accident. I was looking for Rocky Horror Picture Show, and the tape said Rocky and I’m a fucking moron, and thought they were the same thing because whoever labeled the tape didn’t bother to write the whole thing, and then I’d already paid for it so I just... watched it and... kinda got sucked in. I love a good suave-athlete-falls-for-a-freak plot.”

Steve grinned. “Me too! I only cared about the boxing when I was younger, but now...”

Eddie tipped his head and stared at him bewilderedly. 

“What?” 

Eddie shook his head dismissively, tentative smile pulling at the side of his mouth, mumbling, “Never would’ve guessed.”

Steve felt horribly seen, like he’d said too much, flush creeping up his face, and he reached up to pull on the hair at the back of his neck again. But Eddie just laughed softly and pushed himself over next to Steve, leaning back against the wall and brushing his shoulder.

“Are you going to be okay to drive home?”

He nodded, starting to shift to his numb, tingly feet, stumbling and having to prop himself on the wall. “Yeah, I should probably go.”

“Hey.” Eddie grabbed his wrist, softly; he could pull away if he really wanted to. “Calm down, give it a minute. You just started breathing again, let’s make sure you’re good to go.”

So Steve didn’t pull away. He slumped back against the tile, legs sprawled forward to get the blood flowing again. 

“Does your head hurt?” 

Steve glanced over. “What?”

“Just... uh,” He shifted uncomfortably, clearly trying to find a different way to address what he was thinking of. “You were pulling your hair. I wondered if maybe you... you know, what? It doesn’t matter.” He dug into his jacket pocket and pulled out a little white bottle of Advil. “If you want some.”

“Why do you have that?” Steve chuckled softly, taking it from him thankfully. “I mean, I’ve heard your drug-dealer reputation; I just didn’t realize this is what they meant.”

“Har har.” Eddie rolled his eyes. “It’s for Sinclair actually. He’s been-”

“Bitching about his ankle? Yeah, I keep telling him I’ll wrap it for him but he’s-”

“Being a shithead about the whole thing. He’s gonna drive me to do something drastic.”

“Seriously!” Steve cried. “I’ll hold him down, you can punch.”

Eddie laughed, a real, actual laugh and Steve thought he was going to have no choice but to implode. He was so pretty; he understood the Adrian-mistaking suddenly. 

Steve wanted to say something, wanted to make him laugh like that again, but before he could grasp anything, the door shoved open and shattered their perfect privacy. 

It was the bubblegum girl from the front desk. She popped the wad of pink obnoxiously, huffing out “Dude, the movie’s been over for like twenty minutes. We’re closing.”

Steve and Eddie shared a conspiratorial Ah-shit-we’re-in-trouble look, before getting to their feet. Steve was still holding the Advil bottle, somewhat uselessly because he’d forgotten he had it. He popped it open and swallowed a few, handing it back to Eddie who banished it back to his pocket.

Bubblegum Girl stared them down the whole way out into the lobby, the pair of them giggling as they went, until eventually they stepped into the cold darkness outside the theater, and the spell was broken. Here they were again, in real life, where things were not so great as that bathroom floor or the world within Rocky.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Eddie asked softly like he was afraid something had changed the second they’d passed through the doors.

Steve nodded vaguely. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m alright.”

He shot him a peculiar look and turned off towards where he was inevitably parked, calling out, “Stay safe, Harrington.”

Steve laughed out loud.

March 1986-

Steve hovered over Eddie, who was sitting on Steve’s bathroom counter with his legs over the side, cleaning up the blood on his face with antiseptic wipes Nancy had pulled out of nowhere. His stitches were soft and pliable still, and Steve hated how bulky and thick his fingers were for a moment because if they were small and slim it would force him to be gentler.

Eddie cried out as he brushed over the top of the gash and Steve cringed, yanking his hands back softly to avoid hurting him anymore. 

“Sorry,” Steve murmured. 

He was afraid to reach back to finish the job- Eddie was in enough pain as it was- so he stood there, watching him for any more signs of discomfort.

Eddie lifted his head languidly, glancing at the slash of bright red on Steve’s forehead, the angry crimson chain around his neck. He tentatively traced his fingertips along his skin, not along the scab, but just below it, and Steve hummed out a low sound in relief. 

“You alright there, Balboa?”

It came out a little more slurred than he would’ve liked, but he was on a good deal of narcotics for God’s sake, and it must’ve delivered itself well enough because Steve offered him a small smile. 

“Feel like a large wound,” he offered in his best Stallone accent.

Eddie laughed, and it hurt like a mother on his broken ribs and the stitches in his side, so it quickly delved into a whine, and Steve instantly reached out even if there was nothing he could do. 

He caught his hand, pulled it into his lap, just to hold it there. Steve didn’t say anything.

“Steve.”

“Hmm...”

Eddie let go. Took Steve’s face carefully in his hands, even though the stretch sent pain shooting through his torso. “I understand now. Everything. Robin told me about the Russians.”

Steve swallowed thickly, head dipping almost in shame, as if it was too much to meet Eddie’s eyes and risk finding his pity there.

Eddie just tipped his head back up gently. “If I had known... I... I wouldn’t have let you go home alone that night. That’s... that’s not what Adrian does.”

Steve tipped his head just a little like he didn’t quite understand the sentiment.

Eddie swallowed. “I’m gonna kiss you now. You ain’t gotta kiss me back.”

He properly grinned this time, leaning in to meet him halfway, hands placed carefully on Eddie’s knees as he pulled in his face. 

And he did kiss back. What can he say? He loves a good suave-athlete-falls-for-a-freak plot.

[kalforhelp]

bestie is making me watch rocky 4 (ive never seen a rocky movie before) and i was NOT prepared for apollo to just fuckin DIE

like... i figured he would lose but when it cuts right to his funeral my jaw dropped

this movie is wild with no context

[paperback-writer0807]

Rocky IV just started on AMC, and I once again find myself consumed by the absolute perfection that is this montage.

[ajbullet]

My thoughts on episode 1 and 2 of Percy Jackson and the Olympians: (spoilers)

- The ACCURACY of the little Percy casting was unbelievable. They look identical.

- The SARCASM 🫶🏻👌🏻

- I’ve never been able to connect with Sally Jackson as a mother-figure in the books just because of my own rocky relationship with my mom, but the way she’s played really made me believe in her character and her love for Percy. It gives PERCY’s character more grounding and their relationship really drives the show.

- Sally just sitting in the rain with Olivia Rodrigo playing. Mood.

- “You fell in love…with Jesus?”

- The friction and “betrayal” between Percy and Grover was super interesting to see and I’m really glad they touched on that more than in the books

- I’ve been pronouncing Brunner wrong. Dam.

- Sally saying goodbye to Percy, knowing she was probably going to die 😭. Percy screaming for her.

- the Minotaur fight was awesome

- “YOU DROOL WHEN YOU SLEEP” Omg I can’t believe she said it. Leah’s delivery was different than how I imagined it but I loved it. She’s so matter-of-fact

- Again, I’ve always struggled with connecting with Luke’s character just because I felt like he was a little two-dimensional in the first book and then after that, you know, he’s evil and while I understood his motivations, I just didn’t really…care? Idk but his portrayal really helped me understand the depth of his betrayal and just how heartbreaking his story really is. I already love him more than I’ve allowed myself to from the books

- “She’s my little sister” I love their relationship while it lasts. Seeing how close they are really adds to the layers of both of their characters

- I’ve also been pronouncing Thalia wrong. Double dam.

- THE BLUE CANDY. PERCY BURNING IT NOT TO TALK TO HIS DAD BUT HIS MOM. That scene broke my heart.

- Leah. As. Annabeth. I’m going to be completely honest, Ive loved Leah from everything I’ve seen about her but I was nervous just because of how precious of a character Annabeth Chase has always been to me and I didn’t know if ANYONE, not specifically Leah, could live up to those expectations but omg I love her. Her bluntness. Her facial expressions. Her voice and delivery. Her sure movements and confidence and self-assuredbess that has come from success after success and training for so long. The way she is so unashamed to admit to using Percy and only watching him to see what he could do for HER. In her short amount of screen time so far, Leah was able to add layers to this character I’ve loved for so long that I didn’t even know where there. I never wanted her to leave the screen. My only complaint is that she didn’t have more lines. She is my Annabeth Chase. She’s not from the books. She’s not from the movies. She’s her own version and she stole the show.

- Luke saying Annabeth has a plan and that Percy will know what to do, only for PERCY TO BE FLOSSING AND PEEING AND PETTING GECKOS and trying so hard not to drive himself crazy with his ADHD and having nothing to do. I genuinely laughed out loud. Might be my favorite part.

- the fight scenes are so well choreographed.

- CLARISSE. She’s too pretty. I can’t hate her. And her ELECTRIC SPEAR. When it broke and she screamed, I got chills.

- The trident.

- Annabeth KNOWING Percy was Poseidon’s before anyone else cause she’s “always 6 steps ahead”

- People already keeping such important info from Percy “for his own good”

- “You are Poseidon’s son” “No, I am Sally Jackson’s son!” Might just be my favorite line. It’s so true. She raised him. She sacrificed everything for him. She loved him and cared for him and taught him that he wasn’t broken, he was singular, a miracle. She died so that he could live.

- Sally Jackson is parenting goals

- The way Percy instantly changed his decision to go to the underworld as soon as Grover told him his mom could be saved. Their relationship is unmatched

- Walker Scobell is already pretty well known, but I have a really good feeling his popularity is going to skyrocket after this show. He is such an amazing, dedicated actor. I know exactly what he is felling 100% of the time.

Overall, I absolutely loved it. In two episodes it’s become a comfort show that I can’t wait to continue watching!!

[kuerie]

rocky and his water motif

ive seen a few people analyze rocky and his symbolism with water, and i thought id jump on the train and contribute what ive found. i looked through every piece of art in the gallery and messed around with the dead drop to find everything here! with that being said…

obvious spoiler warnings! and warning for a lot of speculation and over analyzing! a lot of things i mention are really big stretches but i added them anyways incase anyone else wants to look into it more

starting where the pilot starts and near the start of the comic (the page “lackadaisy dithyramb”), right off the bat we have an entire poem from rocky dedicated to the mississippi river. this iconic poem is literally just about the river, and he recites it in both scenes from on the bridge over the river.

note that in both cases there is also a crescent moon featuring in the background

more poetry! this one is from the comic on the page “lackadaisy doggerel”. this is actually one of my favourite pages in the comic, its very cool! we have this poem that, again, is entirely about water. it talks about water in a metaphorical way, comparing it to memory and the passage of time. maybe ill try to analyze this poem sometime but idk im not very good at that stuff. seems to talk about rockys past but im not sure

i didnt want to just put this entire page here but i will note that the page has a raging storm, an ocean, a water mill, another storm cloud and a waterfall all picured above rocky, who, in this case is ahem under water, in a way.

last bit of poetry im talking about is probably the most relevant. rockys feauture in the “lacrimosa” poem/halloween artwork shows him seemingly drowning outside a window.

the significance of it being outside a window is somewhat unclear to me, as every other character appears in something reminiscent of a picture frame. my only idea is that its meant to show him outside of what could be a home, in reference to him getting the “unceremonious boot”. the text emphasizes this idea, saying hes away from home

this next one is more obscure and much more of a stretch! after digging around in sketchbook pages, i found this tiny little sketch on a page simply labeled “lackadaisy preview 0018”. the sketch page features sketches that were used for the page “lackadaisy palaver” in the comic, and a few bonus doodles. this was one of the bonus doodles, and i cant seem to find a comic pannel that matches it anywhere.

this sketch could be a lot of things, its a bit hard to tell. most likely, its an unsused pannel of rocky that was going to be used on the comic page. maybe him on whe windshield, or something like that. that being said, the first thing i thought of was the lacrimosa art. its a stretch but i thought id add it, just in case! who knows really

next up is rockys character artwork, which features him standing on a barrel floating in a river.

be careful rocky, you might fall! one little detail about this art that i like is that hes quite literally hiding his sadness behind his back. and again, the crescent moon motif features in the background. the cattails in this image also remind me of this scene in the pilot

…but i mean cattails do grow near water so i dont think that means anything

speaking of the pilot, this scene has rocky accidentally blowing up a water tower and flooding the area, and getting a whole bunch of water dumped on him

be careful rocky, you might get hurt! ...i dont think he cares

one last note from the pilot (for now) is a line from mitzi after rocky comes back with alcohol for them. it could mean nothing, could be foreshadowing, who knows

note in the second image: “rest” as in the rest of the alcohol they were meant to bring back

the music video for liquid gold ends with rocky dropping a bottle and the golden liquid flooding the room

i wasnt even looking for water symbolism when i found this, i was just rewatching the music video for fun! i just about had a heart attack when it ended like that D: rocky please dont drown

back to the comics! sorry this is a bit all over the place. forgive me for just uploading an entire comic page, but the page “lackadaisy thunderhead” features rocky standing over a river. at the bottom of the pannel on the right there are daisys, a symbol that features in a lot of rockys artwork and is generally associated with the lackadaisy speakeasy. the daisys could just be for aesthetics or to frame the pannel better, but its also notable that they appear where the water is.

the name “thunderhead” is interesting given some other pannels

not sure what it means though

the very first scene in the comic aside from the introduction shows rocky at the river.

in the page “lackadaisy trouble boys” from the early concept art mitzi makes a comment about rockys aim, and makes an… interesting metaphor

side note: im gonna cry is that actually how rocky gets the little hole in his ear lmao

the mini comic “wilderness” has rocky climbing out of a small muddy pool of water claiming “the waters great”, despite looking absolutely horrible. isnt shown here, but he says he cant feel his legs and calls for freckle to come back.

knock knock! its time for the playing cards! rockys card depicts him as the 8 of spades, although hes also been shown as the ace of clubs multiple times.

first up, 8 of spades! i really like this art but i have a lot of questions. for one, why is rocky holding a shovel and whats with the lantern? theres nothing wrong with it, just caught my attention since i think freckle is drawn with shovels a lot more than rocky (might be wrong on that though) second, this is the only picture i can find where you can CLEARLY see rockys head injury healed. cool! third, the outfit hes wearing is… atypical for rocky, you could say. for obvious reasons. he always wears blue, why suddenly the change to black? and obviously, the choice of making him the 8 of spades. some quick google searches and this is what i found: from various websites (the first things that popped on on google), apparently spades symbolizes the winter season and the water element. it seems to represent old age, change, wisdom and acceptance. the number 8 supposedly represents victory, prosperity and overcoming. i was going to put images, but i could only have 30 and i ran out of space lmao im so sorry this is SO LONG djfjsjnrfj

make of it what you will. as for the ace of clubs:

my google searches were much less interesting so ill just put my own thoughts. the clubs is likely just for the association with the lackadaisy speakeasy, as in both of these cases he is shown alongside other characters from the lackadaisy and everyone has clubs. as for him being the ace, the main notable thing about the ace is that its generally the highest card.

the main idea i personally took from these cards is the idea rocky will possibly not be a part of the lackadaisy in the furure. we see him in his classic outfit, no head injury as the ace of clubs, with clubs being associated with the lackadaisy. but we also see him with a healed head injury (so clearly in the future) with a new outfit and no more clubs suit.

not sure if this is even notable but this entire (very iconic) scene in the comic takes place in the rain

be careful rocky, you might get shot!

and now, even more crescent moon motifs

so why have i been pointing this out? well its undeniable that rocky also has motif with this crescent moon. i have no idea what it means but heres my very quick five minute thoughts on it: one: the moon controls the tide. obviously a river doesnt really have a tide, but still! theres some association with water there, so its notablea. two: this might be a stretch but in the pilot theres this very memorable frame where it shows the reflection of the moon (which initially looks like a cat) ahem in the water. obviously water reflects stuff so its not abnormal for the moon to reflect in the water but i just thought it was cool!

aaaand last but not least

this analysis was brought to you while listening to hatsune miku, i probably made a lot of typos so yell at me and ill fix them but not my grammar its terrible and im not fixing that, lmk your thought and if i missed anything, thank you for reading have a nice day sorry it was so long <3

[thunder-shadow]

ive got many!!! 1, 4, 5, 8, 17, 21, 27, 28, 37?!

Thank uuu <333333

Do you daydream a lot before you write, or go for it as soon as the ideas strike?

Oh boy, yeah I daydream a lot haha - usually I get an idea and write down the bare info for it (like the ship and maybe one or two scene ideas) and then I just let it marinate for a bit, usually listening to music or reading! Then ideas usually pop in from there XD I'm a daydreamer all the way

4. How do you choose which fics to write?

Usually it's just whichever one I feel needs attention at the moment? Or whatever my brain latches onto haha

Like yesterday I meant to edit the GHE chapter so it could be posted, but instead I wrote the Earthcury one-shot turned multi-chap (which I wanna finish b4 I post it)

It's very wishy-washy is what I'm saying LOL

5. How many wips do you have?  What fandoms/pairings are they for?

All of WIPs are for SolarBalls haha I can only write for one fandom at a time XD

Okay, so obviously I have the GHE fic, the Jupixturnus fic, the Vercury fic, and now the Earthcury fic (those are all multi-chaps); then I have my oneshots, of which I plan to write Vars, Vearth, another UraEarth, a fluffy Jupiturnus one, a Poly Rocky planets one, and I still have a Sol & Nemesis one with snippets, as well as the post-paranoia Luna fic that still needs its chapter two LOL (and then I have a titanearth smut + jupixturnus smut that i'm thinking abt but shhhhhh)

That doesn't even count the random ideas I've just jotted down in my notes app LOL

8. Post an out-of-context spoiler from a wip.

Oh gee, lemme find one I feel like posting!! I don't have any spoilers to be honest, bc i haven't written since i posted the ghe one or i would've used that 😭 so just have a snippet from my latest wip

I actually posted this the other day but deleted it like immediately LOL but here! from my earthcury college AU

‘Okay,’ Earth thought, narrowing his eyes. ‘First midterm is in 7 days. One week. You’ve got this,’ and he pumped his fist, ignoring the weird looks a couple of people threw at him. ‘Just need to study. Actually study for once.’ Then he looked down at the multitude of papers spread out in front of him, his laptop propped open to a chemistry video from a Youtuber he’d found on line, and groaned, letting his face fall onto the table. Across from him, Mars let out a laugh, flipping another page in his book. “Earth, I don’t know what your definition of studying is, but putting your head on the table and giving up is not studying as far I’m aware.” Earth looked up at him through his lashes, sending him as much of an annoyed look as he could muster before groaning again. “Organic Chemistry is going to kill me! Why did I decide to become a biology major?” “I don’t know. Why did I decide to become an Astronomy major?” “Because you’re weirdly obsessed with aliens?” “Wha-” Mars spluttered, putting his book down and looking at Earth. “No!” “Because you weirdly like math?” “No, Earth, because I enjoy astronomy! I like learning about it!” Mars rolled his eyes, taking a sip from his water bottle after a second. “And I know you’re the same way about biology because we’ve been roommates since freshman year!” “Ughh,” Earth whined in response. “Just let me melt into a puddle and evaporate away so I don’t have to take these midterms.” “You could just study for them, you know.” “That was my plan! But that involves studying…” “Oh, wow,” Mars said, throwing him a stare that just dripped with disdain. “Studying involves studying, I really didn’t know that, Earth.” “Fine!” Earth stood up, shoving his stuff haphazardly into his backpack. “I’ll go to the library! And this time, I’m going to actually study!”

17. Do you have a writing routine?

Nope! I literally just sit down and start writing oop

21. Do you prefer writing chaptered fics or one-shots?

I prefer writing one-shots just bc it feels simpler, like a one-and-done LOL but multi-chaps can be fun too!!

27. What area of writing do you feel strongest in?

Being able to write a lot 😓 and body language, I feel quite confident in body language LOL

Also my grammar and language use, despite my copious use of em-dashes, semicolons, and ellipses I otherwise really just innately understand most grammar bc of how much I read when I was younger ‼️

28. What area of writing do you want to improve in?

DIALOGUE 😭😭😭

37. What fic has been the hardest for you to write?

The GHE fic hands down, it just feels so complicated 😭😭 I'm slowly chugging a lot, we're nearing the last few chapters :D

[the-kipsabian]

He doesn't really need a tag partner (I'm sure there are people he trusts enough to team with) but if Chuck is out forever can we have Kip step in and be a person for OC to lean on? I mean we could get him on TV possibly weekly (win win in my book) plus maybe we can get OC corrupted and boom it helps push the storyline with Trent? IF Chuck is able to come back, maybe he uncorrupts him? Thoughts?

SO. im sorry ahead of time that this will get longwinded and probably not gonna make a lot of sense but i have A LOT of thoughts regarding this whole situation

so this has been a very common thing to discuss in my dms ever since the shades of the best friends betrayal started when trent and oc entered into the tag team tournament (also shoutout to bugs for dealing with my shit constantly cause i know i can be unhinged ough), and what we dubbed as savior!kip has become a very intense hope in this storyline so... yeah ive been thinking about this possibility a lot ngl

im gonna put the rest of this under the cut cause lmao yeah. im gonna go off the rails

i wanna start this by saying that while i do want chuck to come back, im specifically hoping that he'll come back to team with trent again and to torment oc, that all of this has been one big ruse to see if oc really is their best friend or not (spoilers: hes not. trent is right about everything he said dont @ me). and oc is slowly starting to lack friends; seeing how things are going, things with kris arent that great. shibata and hook have their hands full with so many other things. rocky is obviously siding with trent, even if he doesnt say it directly out loud but roppongi vice forever basically, and the rest of chaos is mostly in japan (and okada is evil now so...). danhausen basically doesnt exist anymore. everyone oc has had around him has slowly disappeared, for one reason or another

so where does that leave us, exactly? you turn to the other side (or more in this case, the other side turns towards you to help out)

kip has been critical on twitter about the don callis family, and basically saying he would never join them due to disrespect from don. and we all know how much kip loves and cares about oc (i dont have to proof this to you you have seen all the sweet tweets and other stuff. this man used to use the kissy face emoji frequently while tweeting at or about oc come on now), so seeing these two words colliding would probably not sit very well with him, i'd imagine. while someone could argue that kip has lost interest in oc since he has dropped the title and thats all that was ever about...

first of all, the "sweet little clementine" nickname has been used multiple times throughout the timeline. this wasnt just a mind game trick to get into ocs head during the title feud, it was in there way way before that ever happened (i believe we are talking about full gear 2020 if i recall my timelines right [its around 3 hours and 9 minutes]); he has always been affectionate about oc in a really weird way (hes british tho so thats probably why). second, how many times has kip been after anyone else between ocs title reigns and after? exactly zero. when mox and fenix were champs, he didnt say a peep (he did, whoever, put out my favorite tweet of all time when oc lost the title to mox). after oc gained the title, he started tweeting again about it. and again when oc lost it, not a word. kip hasnt said anything about the international title or rodney since then; the only time he did post, he told rodney to fuck off cause clementine was his. and since then? kip has been keeping an eye on the best friends feud so... do whatever you wish with that information (1, 2, 3)

the point is, the obsession was NOT with the title; hes just always been affectionate about and towards oc, but in a really weird and obsessive, kind of a destructive way

why is this necessary to bring up? well...

do you really think he would stand idly to the side to watch oc align himself with someone like don callis when all his other friends have abandoned him, all these things considered?

do i need to remind you of something? cause i will remind you of my favorite post

throughout this entire time, kip never gave up (im aware this is technically non-canon as this is a quote from stream but. if you know their history over on twitch, it counts. the feud bled over there during its prime too). yes this technically had everything to do with him tearing ocs friends away from him when this was posted, but.. dont you think its fitting tho? considering the situation oc is in now? and while yes it might seem that kip is taking the side of trent in this whole thing, this was specifically before don callis inserted himself into the situation by whispering whatever the hell into ocs ear

and what better time and way for kip to insert himself back into ocs life as the one person he can still rely on than right here and right now, when oc is so desperate for a connection and friendship that he'll take don callis of all people?

if we want to dig more into my personal observations, kip has never felt as respected or perceived as he did/does when hes across the ring from oc. this feud was the highlight of his career since the comeback (and arguably, his [and miros] feud with the best friends ending with arcade anarchy was the other, so these two have always been connected more or less), its the one thing people keep talking about in reference to him apart from the box; how he should have been the one taking the title from him, how kip should have been elevated from that point forward too. how people talk about him almost only when he has faced oc in the ring afterwards (which has been at least three times if i recall right from the top of my head) or had a chance to challenge again for that title before oc lost it entirely

so what is the conclusion i wanna draw from this? kip keeps bringing him up. he keeps on leeching on him. he wants that attention off of oc, but also from oc. and what better way to do that than to now befriend him, show him support, be there for him when everyone else has abandoned him?

except its not entirely malicious. it might start as such, but its definitely mutually beneficial, more so than intended; sure maybe kip takes the chance to get to oc when hes down and vulnerable, but theres also that high chance that he'll see he can actually help. kip can help pull oc back up and help rebuild him. kip can be useful and important in this equation too, not just oc (which.. its gonna show kips true colors tbh. considering how kip treats oc as a whole, but he was taking trents side earlier about everything when best friends broke apart so...)

i think this is enough of me rambling, so im gonna get to the point of the ask lmao; but yeah, while i'd love for chuck to come back, i dont think he needs to be the one to uncorrupt oc from under kips spell. cause there wont be a spell to begin with. while yes it might start more or less as a corrupting relationship if they got to tag together with oc, i dont think ultimately it would be harmful to him. just like kip would be there to be supportive of oc, eventually he would return the favor by helping kip flourish, like he has done more indirectly in the past. they are mutually beneficial to one another, for better or worse maybe, but its not going to lead oc down a dark path in my opinion. if anything, oc is uncorruptable at this point (especially without the belt but i feel like that story has completely died by now with roddy holding the title so im not going to touch that rn), and him getting love and support from someone genuine, although surprising in this case, it would just make him more likely to return that favor than to turn against it. what i mean is, oc would be the one to uncorrupt kip, if anything

thank you for coming to my tedtalk and im soooooo sorry for all of this

[anartisticalniche]

Spoilers for the new episode

oh boy howdy where to start-

ok, first of all, while the change of pace from angst to silly once again was a bit odd, i do feel like getting a Tari centric episode makes sense after so much time from Western Spaghetti.

And i mean this more than just in terms of character development continuity.

But before that, i wanna focus on the general review of this ep

Today we saw how Tari seemed to somehow start working on her self worth and try to achieve herself by getting a job (the fact that she is inspired by Meggys many achievement is so cute too i love these two gals relationship jajdjdjd)

anyways. she tries to get a job as a saleswoman i believe, and thats when were introduced to a new character: her robotic arm (apparently??? XD) who named itself Clench.

First of all, i LOVE THIS GUY AHSHHDJ I NEVER EXPECTED TO LIKE IT SO MUCH OMG? ITS SUCH A FUN CHARACTER LMAO (also i believe ive heard his voice actor before??? dont know who he is, but he did a GREAT JOB.) I really enjoyed the interactions between it and Tari lol they balanve each other out well, given that they share the same body in a sense.

The whole interview was fun as well as the last scene at the zoo, if not a bit random XD (but its SMG4 so... its normal)

Now, for some theorizing.

Given that we have this new character being introduced after last weeks episode, it makes you wonder- why now, of all times?

i believe thats because Clench and Tari are gonna be the key or just really important in this next "arc" if you will, despite it focusing on Three and Four.

Keep in mind, Clench apparently can read minds, it was shown in the episode after all.

it also can do more stuff as well, who knows what else, right?

And given that Three and Four seem to have an ongoing rocky relationship that seems to be reaching its climax, i think Tari and Clench are gonna come into play eventually.

maybe at the most important moment, maybe not, who knows.

but i do know that its gonna be used against Tv Ad as well. Im sure of it.

anyways, episode was alright, and i cant wait where this is gonna lead next week.

[magicalwastelands]

byler

byler is almost always paralleled to romantic couples and not paralleled to friendships. i was thinking about this the other day and turns out you guys voted for byler on the poll so HERE IT IS :)))

minor spoiler alert for: heartstopper, harry potter, stranger things

i'll be talking about how byler parallels to:

romantic pairings in stranger things

romantic pairings in other shows/movies (ive posted a more in-depth post about taoelle [romantic pairing in heartstopper] and byler being similar - if u want you can go check that out!!)

NOT friendships in stranger things (how it rarely parallels to other friendship pairings in the show compared to romantic ones)

romantic pairings in stranger things

jopper (joyce / hopper)

a. jopper has some scenes that parallel byler (this is just one example):

"I think we make a pretty good team." "I think it'll be easier if we're... we're a team."

b. also this music (you might know this already lol but this is just SO CRAZY LIKE WHAT DO YOU MEAN "oh, it's joyce and hopper" AND THE SAME SUBTITLES ARE SHOWN DURING SCENES WITH MIKE AND WILL???!? WHAT?????????????????????) [ website ]

[tender, emotional music swells] [tender, emotional music playing]

rockie (robin / vickie)

a. robin is the only confirmed gay character other than will and her crush on vickie is being shown as possibly reciprocated in the last ep of s4

[tender, emotional music playing] --- also another example of these subtitles

b. vickies relationship with her boyfriend is similar to mikes relationship with el (btw i loooove el im not saying shes similar to that guy, just talking about her relationship with mike and the love triangle imagery)

then theres these scenes of them being DIRECTLY positioned between established couples like.... these scenes are too crazy

2. romantic pairings in other shows/movies - this is strange because why would their dynamic be so similar to couples dynamics? if theyre just supposed to be friends???

harry potter - ron and hermione (I DO NOT SUPPORT JK R*WL*NG)

a. best friends to lovers trope / slowburn trope

in the final harry potter movie, ron and hermione have their first kiss. in the final season of stranger things, mike and w-

b. these scenes...

c. love triangles - ron thinks hermione likes harry over him (similar situation with will but mike and el are actually dating)

Heartstopper - nick and charlie

a. blue and yellow

b. this in the actual books - nick is the heart of the rugby team and mike is the heart of the party:

"You're the heart and centre of this team, Nick." "You're the heart."

c. bonus: i recently bought the heartstopper colouring book (its suuuper cute btw love it) and theres this???? is it giving paladin and cleric vibes???????

3. friendship pairings

lucas and dustin (im only gonna talk abt them for examples of friendship pairings)

a. season 1 - last ep, mike is super worried about will and immediately jumps up to see and hug him (he says that will is awake 3 times), while dustin and lucas are asleep

[snoring] "Guys. Guys, he's up. Will is up. Guys, Will's up."

also omg in this scene dustin calls her a "wizard" and then mike CORRECTS HIM SAYING SHES MORE LIKE YODA I CAN'T... CAUSE WILL IS THE WIZARD NOT EL..... ALSO BRO YODA??? THAT GIRL YOU KISSED AND ARE GOING TO DATE FOR LIKE A YEAR AND SAY YOU LOVE HER IS LIKE YODA???????

"She's basically a wizard." "More like a Yoda."

like bro... THIS UR GF???? LOVE OF YOUR LIFE???????????? YOUR LIFE STARTED BC OF HER?????? (feat. will being the wizard el can't replace in mikes head...)

b. different reactions to will's "body" being pulled out of the lake

lucas says that it must be will. mike doesn't accept the body being will's. (NOT LUCAS SLANDER DON'T WORRY I LOVE HIM)

shocked, has to lean on the truck to calm himself down, gets mad at el because she couldn't help him save will, is in tears, doesn't care about eleven in this moment because he's so sad that will is "dead"

(also sorry for the bad vid quality)

mike is obviously the most affected one by the "body" being found.

c. whenever something happens with will and mike, the others know they shouldn't interrupt, like this (lucas knows not to follow mike out):

and this (they're walking behind the others, having their own private conversation):

and also this (max doesn't get it but the others know mike and will want to be alone):

d. if mike, will, dustin and lucas are all just friends, and mike also said this to dustin (talking about lucas at first) ...

(Mike: He's not my best friend. [sighs] I mean, he is, but so are you. And so is Will.)

... then why is the relationship between mike and will so different and singled out to the relationship between ANY OTHER PAIRING BETWEEN THE FOUR if lucas, dustin and will are all supposed to be mike's best friends??

[fictionkinfessions]

(horizon zero dawn/forbidden west spoilers)

ive come to the realization, sudden and unseen, that i was deeply, deeply suicidal. i could never have brought myself to admit it, certainly not to act upon it- but when i stood outside, the freezing cold piercing even my suit, and walked onward to a home i could always find my way to, even with my eyes closed... it was not the fear of death i felt, or even fufilled acceptance. relief crashed over me, like waves breaking on a rocky shore. i sat on that bench and felt relief, that i could finally rest. that death had finally relieved me of my duty

...i hear tell of rumours, spoilers brought unasked and unwarned upon my dashboard. that she succeeded, fought against time and death itself. that she brought me back. this joyous thing, the prospect of finally meeting her... it fills me with dread. god, please, just let me rest. i have given all i had, every drop of myself, to the world and its continuation. no more.

i hope, that if those rumours are true, that she did it for herself alone. i cannot be asked to save the world again. my shoulders will break beneath the pressure. i cannot again be that once-in-a-lifetime genius, the worlds one and only saviour. i cannot.

as i play through that second entry, somewhere close to halfway through at current, the theme is driven in again and again with all the subtlety of a brick- that she cannot do this alone. should not do this alone. should not give herself to the single-minded focus, the grim, determined solitude that i wreathed myself in. marching on forward in the knowledge that the world was ending and that i was the only one who could save it.

...id have liked to be friends with the alphas. but there was no time. surely, though, surely she has time. i do not want her to fall like i did. her and... her sister. my daughters. oh god, my daughters. i could not have knkw then, but now i do- i made this world for them. so that they would know a place in it.

i hope, desperate, that solitude will not drive them to forfeit it. and i hope, beyond hope, that i was wrong. that she did not bring me back. i could live again, for her, for them. but i want to rest. what hope is there, in a lonely, jaded old woman, who only dared to hope with all her might? i dont know.

i just hope she finds what she is looking for.

- elizabet sobeck (horizon zero dawn)

x

[w0nder1ng-gh0st]

PD N2N AU!!

ive had this idea for sooooooo long!! i really love N2N and i can so see how the the pd characters can fit into the plot!!

full au beneath the cut! i will also be doing my best to keep spoilers fairly low for people who may want to experience N2N in all its tragic glory but i highly recommend you do go watch it to understand this au fully!

Gabe Goodman- Ashe Winters

(this was quite literally the first ever decision i made for this au, cause it just fits so well!!)

Ashe is just your average music lover! She's the older sibling (18) out of her and William and will often leave the house early for band rehearsals with her friends and stay out late doing heaven knows what, much to the disappointment of her father Tide. Despite this, Tide and Ashe have a pretty good relationship! Ashe seems to always be there when Tide needs it, and helps him make some pretty important decisions. Ashe doesn't really talk with anyone else in the family though, their relationship having always been rocky. Natalie Goodman- William Winters (second character i allocated lol! mostly just cause i love William and i love Natalie, but i thought they fit each other really well!)

William is the younger of the two siblings, being 16. He's currently studying classical piano in hopes of getting an early admission to Yale and getting out of the town they live in. He's practically a genius at school, but will often stay up extremely late, studying for tests and exams. Extremely introverted and doesn't have any friends (until a certain two people crash his piano rehearsals tehe). He's a lot more close with his father, Mark, then he is Tide. But even then very rarely talks to Mark. William will more often then not ignore Ashe whenever she tries to talk to him, almost as if he doesn't see her. Henry- Vyncent Sol and Dakota Cole (i think Vyncent fits into the role of Henry sooo well but i didn't want to just exclude Dakota! so i'm kind of splitting henry in two lol) Vyncent and Dakota are two best friends! they've been inseparable since the first grade and will very rarely be seen without one another. Vyncent is a bit of a stoner, and will smoke weed to calm his ADHD, Dakota doesn't really like this coping mechanism of his and is currently doing his best to help Vyncent out of the habit. Dakota also plays piano but prefers the more laid back style of improve jazz, wish is a bit of a shock to the rigid classical WIlliam plays. The two eventually befriend the closed off teen and all three of them begin dating! (they are always a bit confused when Tide offhandedly mentions Williams sister, maybe she's at College?)

Diana Goodman - Tide Winters (THIS WAS QUITE LITERALLY THE HARDEST DECISION. but i think i've settled on Tide being Diana, due to Tide being way more in touch with his emotions and i feel he acts very similar to how Diana does in the original show. Loyal husband of Mark Winters, Tide mostly will stay at home, cleaning and cooking. Tide has been diagnosed with Bipolar disorder for about 16 years now. He is constantly having to switch and alter medication due to it not effecting him in the intended ways and as such, cannot work due to it making him a little out of touch. Tide does his best to be there and support his family but always seems to fall short, wether it being only remembering his daughters birthday or seeming to never be there at important events. Tide does his best for William, but the teen always seems to push him away. Luckily, Ashe is always there when the house seems too quite and happily chats with Tide about anything! (even tipping his medication down the sink) Dan Goodman- Mark Winters (once again was soooo hard! but to me he seems like the type to not really focus on his needs and just do what needs to be done for the family) The tired Father of the Winter family. He does his best to support Tide in anyway he can and to do the same for his children- even if the sentiment isn't always appreciated. He just wants Tide to start feeling okay again. Always makes an effort to show up at Williams piano recitals, even when Tide forgets, and just to be there for William in anyway he can. Will often Drive Tide to his therapy appointments and sit it the car, trying to be there for his struggling husband. (He knows okay? he knows they only have one kid! but why doesn't that stop the third pair of eyes he feels at the dinner table???)

I havn't quite decided on who will take the role of DR.Madden/DR.Fine (maybe Prof. Cross???) but if anyone has any suggestions please lmk!!! Anyways this is my au that im suuuper duper normal about :) I may have art for it soon but its lokey looking like shit rn so dont get your hopes up 😭

[cumberbatchedandproud]

Ok, I just finished Bloodhounds and I still need to scream apparently so here it goes? (Spoilers warning; so beware if you haven’t seen it all yet...)

I came for Woo Do Hwan (no surprise here of course), but actually stayed for and truly enjoyed so much more :) 

First, I have been devastatingly hit in the face/guts/soul right from moment one by Kim Gun/Geon Woo (to which should we stick?). Let’s start with that glorious opening (which i do not need to mention), and then BAM he’s in truth such a pure lovely adorkable cutiepie at the core, and i just melted right away and forever. Yes, please keep politely apologizing while teaching assholes a lesson - this is such a badass move :) - and yet he’s so sincere in his restraint not to harm the stupid irrespectuous nobody and OH MY, THAT’S IT, I LOVE YOU. (I actually rewind that scene THRICE at first watch before going on with the story: that means something.) And then you bet the narrative did put my poor new blorbo though the wringer over and over, and it was sweetly bitterly devastating each and every time - because of course that man does *DRAMA* just so very very very well. And I was so afraid yet definitely expecting his big squeechy heart would end up entirely erased - and ready to go to WAR to save it - (and so ’’Hyung I’ve become a bloodhound’’ was IMO the most heartbreaking line of the show :() - but OH THANK FOR ONCE THE NARRATIVE that it didn’t happen, no matter what? I AM JUST SO HAPPY? (Who cares about gold and being realistic anyway :))

Then, THE FIGHTS. Porn. PURE PORN. The choregraphies, the execution - everything was a (brutal) delight (sort of) to watch. (And yes those seriously mind blowing breath stopping jaw dropping crouchy crouching forward low hits / escapes / moves / combinations definitely caused a new obsession for WDH’s thighs (Honestly? Like I needed yet another obsession over the man? SEND HELP). And I am not ashamed. He obviously trained, and that’s plain to see, so respectfully taking NOTICE is like the minimum I can do to thank him for his service?)

Also, on a side note, I’m a Rocky fan since my youth (yes, I’m a dinosaur, and my sister and I as teens used to watch Rocky IV (along with Top Gun, Dirty Dancing and Pretty Woman) about every rainy sunday - vhs time, sigh...), so I just LOVED all the ‘training’ moments (and not only for THE SHOW (even if my, my what a show...). Just the wink to the iconic running up the stairs had me with such a silly happy smile on my face :) And that ‘please hit me in the abs with a ball’ had me laughing way too hard and will be forever favourite. And the clapping between push ups was the sweetest thing ever. I could go on and on. *dreamy sigh sigh sigh* (and yes, also drooling sigh sigh sigh - but it is not the point i’m trying to make here...)

And then: Hong Woo Jin, my other beloved, of course !! What a sweety pie too !! Their chemistry was just GREAT !! He does care for that kid !! (Also, they wanted to kill him at first in the script? Thanks FATE then - because Gun Woo and Woo Jin DO come in pair - DO NOT SEPARATE !! GRRRR !!) And Badass archer granddaughter Da Min :) And Kim Myung-gil was a delicious villain, with a bonus true bro Kang In-beom to boot.

(Only minus points being (in no particular order) 1) the plot going on moments ‘what are you even doing/thinking/this is not a plan’ (and odd character disappearance (not that much problematic to me because I didn’t really care about Hyeon-joo) - explained since then) 2) the (apparently obligatory in kdrama - should I start worrying about you all?) ‘just let’s get so very drunk’ moments (besides what’s even the point of making a plan while drunk and not remember it in the morning? (do I drink alcohol? YES. (and btw I mean whisky, not beer or so). have i ever been drunk? no. (am i a self-control freak? YOU BET!)) BUT WHEN THEY MADE MY BLORBO DRINK I FELT LIKE CRYING AND THROWING A FIT !! Respect my man’s trauma about his abusive dad (you will not have me believe it was only Mom getting beaten - MY HEART) and his own pledge to himself - even without the obvious reason, everyone is free to decide for themselves what they want to do or not, okay !! GRRRRRRR !! (Luckily though he didn’t get actually drunk and I was SO relieved (I would have been really, really PISSED if they had, because my man would have been feeling so filthy and sick and I would have been devastated and FURIOUS) - had he eaten a lot beforehand? did he make himself regularly puke in the toilets? (the others were so gone they wouldn’t have noticed) Leave my baby alone, anyway !! 3) And well, the torture stuffs and general sort of purification of badness imo = irk !! There are mostly grey characters and greyer characters here (and two sunshines!); do not try to present them as being models of goodness? 4) And last, not a fan of the way Mom was written too - your omelets do look great indeed but where are your claws to defend your shiny and SO deserving of your love and *protection* son, Madam? (I am a Mom) - but I guess it was meant to make Geon Woo only more blorblo worthy, so I guess I’d just have to forget if not approve?)  

Anyway: no need for a season 2 - let them forever from now on just be besties and idiots in peace, please pretty please !! (I would though definitely enjoy a special about them training some more (Woo Jin as trainer :)) etc until  Kim Gun/Geon Woo ends up champion of course, lol - pretty please JUST GIVE IT TO ME!!) 

[poorlittleyaoyao]

If you have other thoughts about other mdzs's charac (or again jgy!) in other role, I would love to read them!

Thank you for your patience, anon! I meant to answer this yesterday along with the one about JGY and Edmund. Each of these involves characters from the Henriad--Richard II, the two Henry IV plays, and Henry V.

-Hotspur, my beloved and cherished son who appears briefly in Richard II and is the antagonist (in the "opposes the protagonist" sense, not the "is a villain" sense) of 1 Henry IV, is the midpoint between Jiang Cheng and Nie Mingjue. Hotspur is essentially a child soldier; his descriptors suggest that he's a young teen when he joins his father in deposing Richard II in favor of Richard's cousin Henry IV. When we see him as a young adult in 1 Henry IV, he's fully immersed in warfare as a way of life, and while he's won great renown, he's... not really doing so great. Some of his lines are alarmingly visceral (ex: "they come like sacrifices in their trim/ and to the fire-eyed maid of smoky war/ all hot and bleeding we will offer them."), and his wife's concerned speech describing his behavior in II.3 reads like a checklist of PTSD symptoms. Hotspur also wholeheartedly believes in his personal code of honor and is clinically incapable of guile in a way that comes off to me as almost childlike. If a cause is just, then it will prevail no matter the odds (spoiler: it does not)! He loves his family and trusts that they have his and the kingdom's best interests in mind (spoiler: they do not)! Basically every line Hotspur speaks in Acts IV and V of the play could be given to Mingjue and you'd only need to replace all the proper nouns.

(Hotspur is also canonically SUCH a horse girl and so is Mingjue in my heart.)

Meanwhile, on the Jiang Cheng side of things, Hotspur also wants SO badly to do a good job. He is so so SO determined to fulfill his roles as a knight and as a son to their fullest extent, and has nothing but contempt for Hal because Hal, despite being heir to the throne, does jack shit and spends all his time drinking and pickpocketing for funsies. For all his impetuousness and general lack of an inside voice (which is NOT a Jiang Cheng problem), he shows flashes of being a strong leader--particularly in his speech outlining his grievances against Henry IV in IV.3. Personality-wise, Hotspur is filled with BIG FEELINGS and most of them manifest as cantankerousness. He is prickly and argumentative by default, which makes him lowkey one of the funniest characters in the play (see: his soliloquy arguing with a letter at the top of II.3, his entire exchange with Owen Glendower in III.1), and also make his moments of genuine vulnerability hit hard (ex: "come, wilt thou see me ride?" in II.3 and his death speech in V.4).

-On the flip side, Huaisang reminds me of Prince Hal. Remember how I said Hal doesn't do jack shit? Hal's flop era is deliberate. He knows he can't run from his responsibilities forever, so he's slacking off to lower people's expectations for him. The first soliloquy we get from him in I.2 is an EXTREME Huaisang mood and I'll try to trim it to the most relevant bits:

I know you all, and will awhile uphold The unyoked humour of your idleness: Yet herein will I imitate the sun, Who doth permit the base contagious clouds To smother up his beauty from the world, That, when he please again to be himself, Being wanted, he may be more wonder'd at... I'll so offend, to make offence a skill; Redeeming time when men think least I will.

His flop era does NOT endear him to his father, who wishes he were an accomplished warrior like Hotspur, and their relationship is rocky. When Hal becomes king upon Henry IV's death, Hal decides to jettison his past friendships, quash the joyful aspects of his identity, and go do war crimes in France. I describe Hal's actions in the play Henry V as "Hal doing his best Hotspur impression," except that whereas Hotspur honest-to-god believed he was fighting for justice, Hal is more calculating. Sure, he gives us the "once more unto the breach, dear friends" and "we few, we happy few, we band of brothers" speeches, but he also cheerfully threatens mass slaughter in response to an insult in I.2 (and ratchets up the threats in gruesome detail III.3).

-Huaisang is also Hamlet, of course, but I don't personally subscribe to the "Huaisang was always sooooo scared of JGY" interpretation of the timeskip. Fear makes you act with urgency, as Hamlet very much does post-Mousetrap and post-return to Denmark. Readers give Hamlet a lot of shit for dithering on killing Claudius, but he does get the job done in just a couple months (much of which he spends offstage with pirates) because all he wants is Claudius to be dead. Huaisang takes his sweet time because he wants JGY utterly destroyed, which is more a Hal vibe.

-Lan Xichen is NOT Richard II at all. I'm not even going to explain why he's not because he's not. However, Richard's big soliloquy when he's imprisoned alone in the penultimate scene of the play is VERY MUCH Lan Xichen in conclusion. It's long--66 lines!--but I will excerpt the relevant portion.

Music do I hear? Ha, ha! keep time: how sour sweet music is, When time is broke and no proportion kept! So is it in the music of men's lives. And here have I the daintiness of ear To cheque time broke in a disorder'd string; But for the concord of my state and time Had not an ear to hear my true time broke. I wasted time, and now doth time waste me; For now hath time made me his numbering clock: My thoughts are minutes; and with sighs they jar Their watches on unto mine eyes, the outward watch, Whereto my finger, like a dial's point, Is pointing still, in cleansing them from tears.... This music mads me; let it sound no more! For though it have holp madmen to their wits, In me it seems it will make wise men mad. Yet blessing on his heart that gives it me! For 'tis a sign of love; and love to Richard Is a strange brooch in this all-hating world.

I JUST!!!!

[guttersnarls]

I've been trying to avoid spoilers from Ghost's two nights at Kia LA because I know it was professionally shot and someday I'll get to see it the way Ghost intended for the rest of us fans who weren't there.

However, I keep coming across these amazing artworks of Popia in a boxing robe and gloves LOL And wow, y'all are so super talented but also I couldn't help but think of Apollo Creed & James Brown doing Living In America from Rocky IV and how fitting that would be for Twenties live (without the death in the end of course) and how the 80's and taking a shit on American politics has been, I guess a vein in the Impera era

Now I don't know if the boxing thing has anything to do with Twenties (and I'd like to keep it that way 🙏) but I just wanted to chime in and say PLEASE GHOST RELEASE THE FOOTAGE SOON

Thanks xoxo

[solarballs-confessions]

MAJOR SPOILERS FOR THE NEW EPISODE

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ok im sorry to anyone our theee who actually enjoyed it bur this episode SUCKED ASS.

Like first of all, dont thw rockies already have more than enough screentime? At least continue the storyline where the moons go talk to the sun dude. Its so sudden?

And honestly come on, you have a whole main channel dedicated to the countryballs, I DOOONT CARRREE ABOUT THEM. WHY ARE THEY IN SOLARBALLSSSSS OH MY GOD???????????? ITS CALLED SOLARRRR BALLS NOT COUNTTRYY BALLLSS LEAVE THEM TO MR. SPHERICAL. DO YOU SEE THE HUMAN BUDDY CAST IN SOLARBALLS? NO! BECAUAE THEY HAVE NO NEED TO BE IN THE PLOT, JUSY LIKE THE COUNTRYBALLS.

And dude. Personally? I fucking hate astrodude and his family, i coulsnt give two flying FUCKS about them tbh.

I did NOT wait TWO WHOLE WEEKS for this episode and get this bullshit. And youre telling me theres more than one part? And after that arc is over theres gonna be an arc compilation? Means at LEAST 2-3 weeks of this shit before an actually valid episode?

IVE SAID THIS BEFORE AND ILL SAY IT AGAIN. FUCK THE ROCKIES. THEYRE SILLY AND ALL AND I.LPVE TJEM BUT THE AMOUNT OF SVREENTIME THEYRE GWTTINF IS TOO MUCH. THE EPISODES THEY HAVE ARE UNDERWHELMING NOW AND POSTING MORE ABOIT THEM IS MAKING IT QORSE. THE JOVIANS HAVE SO MUCH POTENTIAL, PLEASE DUDE. AND WHEREEE THE FUUUUCKK IS PLANET X OH MY GOD CAN HE SHOE ON THE SCREEN FOR MORE THAN 5 FUXKING SECONDS JESUS CHRIST.

giggles

glad to get that off my chest!

-🐬

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[aliensunflower-fics]

okay so I WANT to read your new 'changing faces' fic but im not into Adrien Salt. Ive read all your other stuff so I know your 'salt' varies from intense to really light i know you might not want to give spoilers for your fic but do you think you can let me know what kind of adrien salt it is exactly??? please i just wanna read your stuffff

Okay so I thought a lot about how to answer this ask without giving spoilers and I think I figured it out.

My new Fic Changing Faces is meant to a more lighthearted fun fic with I hope some good humor. The only people who are going to be properly roasted and salted will be Gabriel Agreste and my version of an actual villainous Lila.

Adrien is NOT a villain in my story, hes not gonna get salted much if at all. Rather it will be closer to my previous story A Winters Dance where Adrien is more jealous and confused. He's not gonna get the girl, and hes not gonna be main character in the fic either. I still tag it as 'adrien salt' because Marinette and him in my fic have a rocky relationship thanks to Lilas meddling and also thanks to Marinette knowing her crush wasn't healthy. Likely with the way the story is going Adrien might get a little bit of growing up arc.

So yes, it is tagged Salt but no its not gonna be bitter or mean or full on burn the witch. If you liked A Winters Dance and you enjoy a bit of jealous Adrien angsting then growing up then I think you will like the fic just fine.