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it lowkey bothers me that dexter killed travis marshall, a man who was clearly mentally ill and should have received treatment for his delusions...

or perhaps im too strawberry generation to watch this show

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just finished dexter for the first time and that ending is actually one of the worst series finales ive ever seen.

[spoilers]

it really did such a huge disservice to all the characters, and gave nobody a proper conclusion. we watched these characters grow, struggle and fight moral dilemmas, only for none of it to matter.

dexter loses everyone.

hannah is abandoned in argentina to raise someone else's kid.

harrison's birth mom was murdered and now his dad is "dead".

deb is killed by her own brother; and then her body is disposed like other criminals.

quinn broke up with jamie to be with deb and now he has no one.

jamie doesnt have quinn anymore.

angel has lost so many people close to him — his best friend, deb, la guerta, etc.

astor and cody are now fully orphans, and their half-brother is ?? god knows where ?? as far as they know.

it also ruins dexter's character. we saw him progress over eight seasons to be a loving father, a good boyfriend, "becoming human", only for him to selfishly abandon it all to ?? become a logger ??

dont even get me started on the events that led to this ending. firstly, dexter falling in love with hannah was the stupidest, most ridiculous thing ive ever seen. i hated hannah from the get-go, and as much as the writers feed dexter lines to comment about his and hannah's "chemistry", there was absolutely nothing going on between them. they didn't have an iota of chemistry, compared to dexter and rita.

dexter abandoning everything to selfishly pursue a life with hannah, then absolutely backtrack on it at the last second was also stupid as shit. neither decision should have been as rushed as the scriptwriters made it.

oh and! him choosing not to murder vogel's son the first time was so out of character and unnecessary. it was also the exact same lesson he learnt in season 4 with miguel.

also, the whole "quinn and batista mutually agreeing to cover dexter in the murder of vogel's son" thing was way too rushed and out of character for both of them. quinn might accept it, as revenge against deb. but batista is a good, honest man. that's always been his thing. the writers could have easily sidestepped this dissonance by making it just a dexter-quinn thing. it would also have been nice for quinn and dexter to finally put all their rockiness behind them and mutually support each other in the loss of deb.

and and sorry its a minor thing, but killing off zach hamilton was a mistake. you wanted to write a spin off afterwards? zach was a perfect successor to dexter. young, eager, and sensible. he was starting to get interesting, and then was abruptly ended. this show really has issues with keeping its interesting characters.

anyway fuck the ending of dexter. fuck it all. anything after season 4 isn't canon to me. i refuse to accept the incest plotline, deb killing la guerta, dexter falling for hannah, whatever season 8 was, blah blah blah.

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[spoiler cw]

they killed off sergeant doakes and expect me watch another three more seasons without him???

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honestly watching PB is starting to feel like a chore... i signed up to watch an interesting ensemble cast break out of prison. i wanted to watch them evade guards and clear lincoln's name in court. i wanted to see a curious mix of people who have nothing in common but get brought together for a common goal.

i loved season 1 when each character had their own peculiarities that added to the plot or worked towards the goal (e.g. tweener's lifting, abruzzi's mafia ties, westmoreland's reputation with the guards, and of course, michael's genius)

instead, im watching the most annoying plotlines of: (a) mahone being the biggest douche ever and i guess he wants to kill michael now because michael mentioned his family and that dead man?? (b) paul kellerman uselessly hunting sara down and torturing her across two episodes; (c) whatever is going on between bill kim and paul; (d) michael is getting to mexico, i guess, remember that?; (e) bellick getting arrested for murder - nobody cares

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david apolskis is the truly one of the funniest character concepts ever. what if there was a guy who went to jail and literally could not make any friends because they all disliked him there.

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back ! some things ive watched in the past few months:

the thundermans (2013)

it's a kids show so it'll be unfair to score it against the other things ive watched. i do adore children's TV, tho! they are fun and unserious, especially when your brain juices are constantly cooked from life.

anyway, best thing about this show was max's arc. show lost steam in season 4 when his character lost its defining motivation.

umbrella academy season 4

i couldnt tell you what happened in the 6 episodes i watched, but i remembered being so angry at the ending. you are telling me that we watched them fight the injustice they went through as kids, grow and develop, become a family, fight intergenerational trauma... just for all of it to mean nothing in the end??

also... the season left more questions than it gave answers. who made ditarium or whatever that substance was? why did it "infect" jennifer? why was jennifer in a squid? are there no timelines where that substance is never made?

taskmaster junior

i only saw episode 1 and it was brilliant! adore the kids they've casted. nyarah and lazer have my whole heart

and now im starting on prison break! i love wentworth miller so this has to be good

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if any show deserves to be revived, its dead boy detectives

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charles and edwins disguises look so married and now I can't stop thinking about some random guy trying to connect with charles in his disguise over 'I hate my wife' jokes and charles goig on a wild tangent about how much he loves his wife and how she's his favorite person in the world and getting really protective because internally he's like: that's not his wife that's his best friend but if he WAS his wife he would love him so much

and then he would simply not get the implications of that and go about his day like "wife successfully defended, friendship successfully friended, job officially jobbed 😃👍🏻"

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theos parents named him "Theodore Karl"

Theodore means "Gift of God" ; Karl means "Free Man"

theo then goes on to never see his parents again once hes taken by the dread doctors. he grows up getting groomed and abused, getting turned into something "truly evil." he gets made into a machine, into their attack dog and they try and succeed to corrupt him.

and then he gets imprisoned underground. he literally goes to hell. and hes stuck there, in this time loop of torture. he was stuck in the operating theaters, the dread doctors keeping him on a leash and then hes stuck with tara. and even once liam frees him, he gets put into a holding cell. liam puts chains on him. hes still stuck, always chained down. captured by the hunters in s6b then getting put into a jail cell yet again. and on and on.

he goes from being called "gift of god" to scott telling him "you're barely even human" to the dread doctors calling him a failure to him being an atheist. he goes from being called "free man" to literally never being truly free. until liam.

liams parents named him "Liam Eugene"

Liam means "Guardian/Protector" ; Eugene means "noble/well-born"

liam, who doubts himself all the time and feels like he cant protect anyone. he tells himself that he failed to save hayden, that he failed to save brett and lori, that he failed to save all the people that got taken by the ghost riders, that he failed to protect scott, mason and the rest when gabe shot up the house. he thinks he isnt good at being a leader, when he actually really is and his friends are always willing to follow him. hes good at being protective, even if he doesnt believe it.

liam, who struggles with his self-worth and self-harm because of his disorder, but his mom named him "well-born" all along. theres nothing wrong with him, even though he feels like there is.

and liam is the one to save theo. he frees theo, he argues with the rest of the pack why they need theos help. he makes theo feel like he can finally be free. and in turn, theo saves liam as well. multiple times, in more ways than one. they complete each other

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today's prize category is: "the best taskmaster series"

(or; my top tm series + why)

cast & iconic lines

ed gamble (👑): "this is the worst day of my life."

jo brand: "do you like cats? ...good, it's a fox."

katy wix: "why are you telling me? i don't care."

rose matafeo: "well, every good shid—"

david baddiel: "it didn't occur to me that it wouldn't be a face."

overall

a classic taskmaster series that i always use to introduce friends to the show. it has a perfect mix of contestants with varying types of humour, and excellent chemistry between them.

ed gamble's playful competitiveness, rose's energy, katy's quiet quips, david's incompetence and jo's lack of fucks really tie the whole show together.

there were so many iconic tasks that had me rolling on the floor with laughter. off the top of my head, the draw on backs studio task, the aubergine task, the water feature task...

the cast are great individually, but their dynamics really tie it all together. series 9 also has the perfect mix of simple & elegant tasks, as well as very chaotic and clunky ones that you want to watch through to see how people interpret it.

special mentions to:

greg and alex's banter with this cast was also super smooth and genuinely funny. i especially loved ed stealing greg's things and greg stealing ed's swim trunks back.

series 7

nz series 2

series 7

series 4

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july watches 🎬

1. descendants: rise of red

2/10.

very poor storytelling abilities created this story.

i love musicals, but the characters actually broke off into song for absolutely no reason throughout the film (e.g. rapping dialogue that could just have been dialogue)

they spent half the movie on intro, and then kind of forgot they had to write a good climax or conclusion

hated their decisions with how to use their cast (which i thought wasnt bad). why uliana and not ursurla? since when was morgana a popular disney villain? why did hook and morganas kid have no personality? why is chloe so boring?

2. taskmaster: series 4, series 8, series 9, CoC 1, CoC 3, series 15

• series 9: 10/10. very strong cast. almost everyone filled a specific niche of comedy that was thoroughly entertaining and enjoyable. the cast also played off each other very well. ed gamble, in particular, is an absolute riot.

• series 4: 9/10. genuinely the most wholesome cast. they werent the wildest or most competitive, but their vibe was so pure and sweet its wholesome to watch. mel and hugh are huge softies. noel and joe are the chaotic cousins, and lolli the youngest.

• series 15: 7/10. i didnt expect to like series 15 as much as i did. casting was okay, though not particularly interesting. a stand-out cast member is ivo graham who had me laughing until my sides hurt. not a particularly memorable series, but not bad

• series 8: 5/10. ambivalent series for me, because i loved joe thomas' odd personality, but lou sanders and iian sterling made it unbearable sometimes. lou was genuinely annoying, and i had to skip through MANY scenes of her whining and being bratty. ian was wayy too competitive and aggressive. but at least he toned it down after seeing himself be that way on the big screen.

3. taskmaster NZ: series 2

• 10/10. i never wanted to watch any taskmaster spin offs after watching taskmaster US a few years back, but series 2 of TM-NZ might rank as one of the best series ever, even when up against TM-UK

• the cast and chemistry was excellent. they also had many memorable taskd like "find alex", the never-ending "float a brussel sprout" and "milk jugs on the microwave". i cant go a day without thinking about guy's greenscreen date with paul.

• i applaud the casting of jeremy and paul, too. for they were able to set the tone true to the original TM, while not exactly copying greg and alex. paul is a lot more quippy and sarcastic, and jeremy more deadpan. but all enjoyable, nonetheless

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i have some followers on this blog so its my last bastion of hope. if you have a netflix account and care about the future of queer television PLEASE do me one small favor and go stream "dead boy detectives". its a paranormal detective show with 5 confirmed on-screen queer characters and a PHENOMINAL slowburn mlm romance. in the next few days there will be news on whether its cancelled or renewed, and there's a lot riding on this show. i dont even need you to watch it, im just looking for a few extra people to stream it in the background to give it a fighting chance. if youre reading this and you have netflix please, just let the first episode run in the background of whatever youre doing. LIKE ILL ACTUALLY PAY YOU IM NOT JOKING EVEN A LITTLE

also if you like hook descendants i specifically got into this show because of joshua colley and now im obsessed. please watch for him.

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I made a thing….

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Scott and Stiles: [interrogating a supernatural creature]

Said Creature: By the way, I like this whole good cop/bad cop thing you have going on, very nice

Scott: Yeah except we're not doing good cop/bad cop, it's just that I'm nice and Stiles isn't

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guys, is it gay to shove ur frenemy into an elevator, tell them you will be the bait, then shut the door to seal him safely inside?

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liam is such an it girl, if you think about it. not only is he the first-bitten beta of a true alpha, he’s also the chimera of death’s boyfriend. like, you know hell would break loose if anything happens to him.

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thiam core

(liam's in the process of making a video for scott while he's in college to acknowledge that the puppy pack is fine)