#rocket Girls 101 | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

thatonefatgumsimp · 1 year ago

Text

Which Secret Life POVs I've Watched So Far (will be updated and edited as I finish)

OK so I may or may not have gotten distracted again- oops- but basically I'm putting here which POVs I've already watched in full and what my first thought about each one was.

-WARNING: wall of texts and ramblings from an mcyt obsessed audhd under the cut...and also spoilers. Don't click unless you're ready for simultaneously spoilers and an ungodly amount of text lol-

Grian: "God this series is so hype I can't wait to see what all happens and- OMG GEM IS HERE! :D GEM IS GREAT! I can't wait to see her kick Etho's ass at PvP again /lh ...waiminute...is that logo on the statue...is that the Watcher logo??? Huh??? Wait...and why does it have the same mossiness of the Entity and Grian's s9 base? Suspicious...OMG the chaotic Best Friend energy with Mumbo and Grian- tbh would be me and my best friend on any given day. Amazing. Their laughter is so infectious too lmao- Oough merch! Pretty :3 Wait it's over already? Aweeeeh ): can't wait for the next episode tho!"

Mumbo: "Wait he switched sides of the circle when Martyn punched Jimmy lmaoooo just like 'these people are crazy, save me, Grian-' 💀 The best friend energy omg still amazing I love their dynamic so much! Ooh a sideways house that *IS* an interesting idea! WHY DOES JIMMY KEEP BREAKING THE CRAFTING TABLES LMAO Hmmmmm Impulse ik cherry blossom is great, but that salesman voice is indeed very sus. I'm with Mumbo on this one."

Skizz: "Idk I watched it when I was very tired last night and all I remember is 'Awwweh a frog! Take care of him...WH- TANGO!!!' and also him apologizing to Gem which was very nice. Oh yeah and love island <3"

Jimmy: "Alright, Timmy, you've got this. Just don't die and- OMG MARTYN NOOOO LMAOO- Aweeeh it's like when you have a really young sibling or you're, like, a parent or something and you kiss the child's scraped knee to make it feel better- 🥺 wholesome. THANK YOU! I thought I was alone in recognizing that symbol, thank you for acknowledging it. JIMMY LOOK OUT OMG YOU'RE GONNA GIVE ME A HEART ATTACK! OK but the task. This man is an absolute menace lol. Aweh that's very nice of Scar to compliment Jimmy's outfit! SCOTT LMFAOOOO YOU'RE SO RIGHT, BUT AT THE SAME TIME 💀 Jimmy building in the Mesa? Tumble Town 2 electric boogaloo?? 'Hmmmm if Scar's building a shack, we're gonna have to have a shack-off, mine's better.' NO JIMMY DON'T STEAL THE CAMEL! D: pftttt Scar would- remember the Relation-ship? And the Ranch? Arson boy lol. THE VALLEY GIRL ACCENT I CAN'T- 😭"

Scar: "OK, Scar, you can do the task, I believe in you. I've seen 4 other POVs which prove that you failed, but I still believe in you. OMG THAT'S WHY HE COMPLIMENTED JIMMY'S OUTFIT LMAOOO I WASN'T PAYING ATTENTION- So true, Scott. So true. But you can't stop them, they're still gonna end up neighbors. I know, I already watched Jimmy's POV. SCAR NOOOO YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO TELL THEM- The way he jumped in the water- 💀 hc that c!Scar shook out his long-ish messy brown hair like a dog after that. Cuz he would. 'I'll make an exception for you. The first and ONLY exception.' if someone doesn't use this as, like, a fanfic title or something I swear- literally perfect material for a c!Scarian fic title. AWEEEEEEH HE CALLED GRIAN THE LIGHT OF HIS LIFE- I CAN'T BHATGLFYSJBJSRSKBLBK 🥺 Scar just like 'y'all crazy. Bye.' AWEEEEH GRIAN AND SCAR'S CAMEL RIDE! DESERTDUODESERTDUODESERTDUODESERTDUO! The way they stare at the hole Big B dug like *insert surprised Pikachu here* awwwwweh the way he let Grian have the cactus monopoly 🥺 you will never not convince me that bullying is their love language. c!desertduo bullies each other affectionately...I'm so normal about c!desertduo I promise- HE TALKED ABOUT ASOKA FOR 30 MINUTES OFC HE DID- 💀😭 I was wondering why he didn't include it lmao- NOT SCAR TREATING THE CAMEL LIKE A DISNEY RIDE LOL learning about the task goodies with Tango, Jimmy, and Scar 101 'IS IT A ROCKET' LMAOOOOO- HE'S SUFFOCATING AGAIN- SCAR BE CAREFULLLLL!!! Ik it's not in the comments, but, I GOT TO THIS POINT AND I'M ENJOYING IT, SCAR! Love this series sm and I'm only 5 POVs in lol. 'It's looking kinda like a shack' 'fancy house and exotic materials' indeed, Etho. Also yes, Scar, part of what gave it away is that ur favorite color is orange lol /lh the fact that Jimmy is the only one I've seen to call him 'Obi' when he says 'Hello There'- amazing. 'Nonono it's not a shack, look at that entrance!' But, Scar, you just said- ...OK- 'this is my shack' OK, Scar I'm confused. Is it or isn't it a shack? Ofc he cut out the arson threats and allegations smh /lh 'until next time, we'll see you later, and don't forget to subscribe because you may just become. SCARRRRED FOR LIFE!' ...yes I've memorized his outro-"

Martyn: "Wait OK before we start- are we sure that punching Jimmy didn't just, like, transfer the canary's curse? /lh like it could also be that he won last series and now he's the 'wet cat' of the first episode like I saw in another post, but like, what if?? I guess we'll see, huh? The awkward 'goodbye' and then walking the same way lmaooo 💀 Lizzie and Gem: 'WE HAVE TO GET TO THE CHERRY BLOSSOMS!' Martyn: 'uhhhhh anyways so-' what am I gonna get? Well uhhh probably one of the life hoodies, but I'll probably have to convince my mom to get it as a Christmas gift cuz I already spent a lot in the last month cuz I have no self control- but yeah probably the balloon hearts hoodie or the drippy hearts one. Love those. 'Ofc no wearing helmets' Scar, who has a helmet: 'Hi, Martyn!' 'oh mY GOd you scared me-' Payback for the jumpscare to Grian last series /lh /hj 'friends?' 'friends?' 'friends?' 'Helloooooo!' 'Martyn!' Idk why but that interaction made me exhale like- just imagine shouting through the walls in a cave to your friends irl. Omg now I'm imagining it with the reverb- 'you couldn't spare a heart, could you?' gives off the vibes of 'please sir, could I have some more?' Oliver Twist who? /lhj Bdubs and his chainmail lol 'THERE'S A SPAWNER?!' yeah...he's definitely having a rough first session- o7 'what is happening out there-?' I'd like to know too, Martyn, unfortunately I haven't watched their POVs yet. Also Etho saying 'BDUBS RUN! HIDE!' I- I'm normal about c!Ethubs I promise- 'YOU GOT HORSE ARMOR?!' ofc the local horsegirl /lhhj would ask about that lol- NOT ETHO TURNING INTO CANADIAN DAVID ATTENBOROUGH AND NARRATING HIS, MARTYN'S, AND BDUBS' ADVENTURES THROUGH THE CAVE- I- 💀 'this could go viral' true, Bdubs lol. BDUBS' MIC CUTTING OUT I'M CRYING- Gem's reaction of 'a what?!' and Scott's response of 'we just don't have a healer' is just perfect lol. Love that. WE'RE PLAYING THE MARTYN GETS NERFED MOD! TODAY WE CODED IT SO ALL THE MOBS ATTACK MARTYN AND ONLY MARTYN! that's the vibes Scott's comment gave me lol- 12 HEARTS?!? MARTYN!! OMG BE MORE CAREFUL!!! This Martyn nerf hitting hard- 'this could be really bad if I get poisoned-' YES IT COULD, MARTYN, YOU'RE ALREADY AT 12 HEARTS- IT'S LIKE YOU'RE TRYING TO BE THE FIRST TO YELLOW- /lh bro Martyn being risky is making my anxiety go 📈📈📈📈📈 BE MORE CAREFUL, MARTYN, PLS- I BEG OF U- MARTYN GOING TO THE NETHER- 📈📈📈 MARTYN THERE ARE GHASTS- PLEASE- I- AAAAAAAAAAAAA! MARTYNNNN! OMG! IS HE ALWAYS THIS RISKY, USUAL MARTYN VIEWERS?! CUZ IF SO IDT I'M GONNA SURVIVE BINGING ALL THE LIFE SERIES- 'ughhh I swear, dude, I swear, I'm gonna cry!!!' I AM TOO, PLEASE STOP GETTING INTO DANGER, MARTYN- Martyn saying damnit is me the whole time he's out risking his hearts. My heart can't take this kind of pressure, Martyn please stop being so riskyyyy- 😭 nINE HEARTS- MARTYN!!!! Istg I'm not surviving this episode- my heart is just- 📈📈📈📈📈📈📈 his pICKAXE BROKE?! OH YOU'VE GOTTA BE KIDDING ME! 'OH MY GOD, THE SUN!' I'M HAPPY TOO, HOPEFULLY HE DOESN'T LOSE TOO MANY MORE HEARTS. 'I've been to the nether and everything!' Yeah, imma be honest, I don't get that one. Like, didn't you write a song lITERALLY CALLED 'Screw The Nether' with friends????! /lh Lizzie's 'oh wow' 💀 fIVE AND A HALF HEARTS!! MARTYNNNN!!! OMG! 📈📈📈 NOT THE DROWNED- 😭 LEAVE HIM ALONE, BRUH, HE JUST TRYNA SURVIVE- Martyn panicking- same, bestie- Lizzie just like 'oh you stole my bed? Didn't notice' 💀 #1 way to tempt a horsegirl: offer something to protect his horse /lhj Cleo's laugh lol- infectious. MARTYN ZOOMING IN AND JIMMY JUST BRINGING BACK SCAR'S CAMEL IN THE BACKGROUND I CAN'T-"

OK I'm posting this and I'll rb for the other POVs, but Cleo's next.

So let's see, next rb is probably gonna be Cleo, Gem, Tango, Scott, Bdubs, and Pearl.

Third rb is probably gonna be Etho, Joel, Lizzie, Impulse, and BigB.

3 maybe 4 rb max.

#YOOOO THANK GOD IT SAVED MOST OF THIS IN DRAFTS I CLICKED AWAY AND FORGOT TO SAVE I WAS ABOUT TO CRY-#tofs musings #my thoughts on the first session of Secret Life #secret life #secret life spoilers #trafficblr #traffic life smp #grian #mumbo jumbo #skizzleman #solidaritygaming #goodtimeswithscar #inthelittlewood #also the reason that some of them are way longer is cuz I'm writing them as I watch and not after the fact

21 notes · View notes

boysplanetrecaps · 1 year ago

Text

Produce 48 Recaps: Entrances (episode 1)

Hello there, National Producer! (That’s you. You’re a National Producer.)

Do you miss giant scale Korean reality shows? Are you fainting away, wishing there was one to watch? Or are you, perhaps, a fan of AleXa, Alice/Elris, Bugaboo, Cherry Bullet, El7zup, Everglow, H1-Key, IVE, IZ*one, k-dramas, Kep1er, Le Sserafim, Lightsum, Purple Kiss, Queenz Eye, Rocket Punch, Secret Number, or any of the 48 franchises - AKB48, HKT48, or NMB48? Did you watch Sixteen or Produce 101 and want to know what happened later? Did you watch GirlsPlanet999 or Queendom Puzzle and want to know what happened before? Are you bored and enjoy snarky recaps of tv shows from five and a half years ago? If you answered yes to at least one of those questions, then stick around! And if you didn’t, stick around anyway because this is going to be great. But if you’re not a fan of (a) honest assessment of skills and performance (b) curse words ( c ) sarcasm (d) long, chatty, rabbit-hole digging, silly recaps that take longer to read than it would take to watch the show, maybe not.

You might be wondering, well, who are you, anyway? I’m an adult female human being living somewhere in North America. You can call me BPR-Unnie (or BPR-Noona, if that’s better for you. This link may help you decide!) I know a smattering of Korean and a bit about Korean culture, but I’m not Korean. I know a smattering of Japanese as well but I’m also not Japanese. My favorite kpop group is EXO and from that you would be correct to conclude I tend to have a bias toward excellent singing. But if I sneak in the fact that I have watched more than my fair share of Kai fancams, you’ll learn that I am not immune to stage presence and dancing. I like girl groups and boy groups equally and am basically just the multi-est of multi-stans, though “stanning” for me doesn’t tend to include watching variety content or buying things. For the most part, I just listen to music and watch performances.

If you’re wondering, what the heck is Produce 48? As Wikipedia says, it was “the third season of the South Korean reality competition series Produce 101. It was a large-scale project in which the public ‘produces’ a girl group by voting for members out of a pool of 96 contestants from South Korea and Japan…. The show was a collaboration between the MNET series Produce 101 and the J-pop idol group AKB48.” The winning 12 girls were announced as new project group IZ*One on August 31, 2018. (Other side note: IZ*one is pronounced “is-one” not “eye-zone”, per the Korean phonetics.)

It’s fun to go back and rewatch this show because around a third of these girls went on to do other things in the world of Kpop, and it’s fun to see them when they were so much younger. Also, shows like this are fun and weird just in general.

This recap will spoil some things, but not every single thing. I’m going to, as we go along, mention where various people end up -- I’m assuming that if you’re here, you either already know or don’t mind being spoilered on that kind thing. I will point out future members of Alice/Elris, Bugaboo, Cherry Bullet, Everglow, H1-Key, IVE, Le Sserafim, Kep1er, Lightsum, Purple Kiss, Queenz Eye, Rocket Punch and Secret Number. I’ll also point out future Queendom Puzzle visitors. But I’m not going to go out of my way to tell you exactly who makes the final lineup of IZ*one, exactly when people will be eliminated, and where every single person is going to end up (I’ll tell you after they get eliminated). That seems like the best compromise based on the poll. Plenty of people become famous after a show like this without making the final line up of the debut group -- like G-Idle’s Soyeon on Produce 101. So if you don’t know the name of every member of IZ*one, you can watch the show along with me and enjoy it, while still knowing who everyone is. And if you do want to be spoilered on who makes it into IZ*one, you can just look up the names of the members and keep that handy as you read. I hope that all makes sense!

I actually watched Produce 48 many years ago -- maybe 2019? It was after IZ*one had already debuted, so I was watching to get caught up. It was the first such show I ever watched and I wasn’t in the habit yet of taking notes to keep track of everyone, so for the most part I had no idea who anyone was the whole time. I mean, with 96 girls, many of whom meet certain beauty standards and thus can look quite similar to one another, and all of whom are in the habit of changing their hair/eye color/style constantly, it’s hard. So I have almost no memory of the show except for two things: (1) loving Huh Yunjin and (2) feeling sorry for the girl who the show made fun of for having intense eyes. I thought Yunjin was obviously the best on the whole damn show and was irritated that she was ever ranked anything other than first fucking place, and that other girl, I just wanted to give her all the hugs. We’ll meet her soon enough!

Finally, you may wonder, where am I watching the show? I watch it here: https://kshow123.tv/show/produce-48/episode-1.html I have to note that sites like this are really spammy and you’ll need a good adblocker and, to be on the safe side, working anti-virus software before you to click that link. Once you’re on the page, when you first click “play” on the video, it always opens a pop up ad that you have to close and then try again, when it will actually play. The pop-ups I’ve seen haven’t been offensive or gross in any way, and this site is less spammy than the one called kisstvshow, which bombards you with actual photos of actual peens like, immediately. Just close-up peens, glistening at you. No thank you. You can also find clips of the show on Youtube, but they’re kind of disorganized. There are some bits and pieces of episode 1 in this playlist. I’ll also provide links to individual auditions as we go.

Ok, let’s go!

We start off with some typical MNET self-congratulatory stuff -- all the buzz about this show before it even debuted! -- complete with a picture of THE SAKURA™, future visual queen of Le Sserafim. Then as a gentle piano rendition of our soon-to-be-favorite song Neko-ya plays, a voice over talks about what the 96 girls (and women) on this show think about their training journey, and we see the lovely profile of Huh Yunjin. Yay! My favorite!

We hear that it’s hard for them to be trainees and that sometimes they almost want to give up. But they keep pushing forward to try. 96 seeds working hard to sprout, and the national producers will shine on them like sunshine! Awww. Produce48 starts now!

An alarm rings, shocking us awake from our gentle piano daydream. We’re confronted with… this. Whatever this is.

It’s Lee Seung Gi, the host this time! His bed is vertical! It makes too much sense!

Ok, folks, for me personally, Lee Seung Gi being host is super important, because he’s sort of the reason I’m even here. He was one of the stars of the ridiculous, the sublime, the problematic, the perfect, My Girlfriend is a Gumiho.

This drama aired on a local Korean-language cable channel back in the day (I lived in a major city that showed foreign programming on cable), and I stumbled on it while changing channels and stood there staring at it wondering what in the actual fuck I was watching. Who needs subtitles or any knowledge of Korean when you have… this?

It’s the first piece of Korean culture I ever consumed, other than kimchi. This was even before Gangnam Style! It led to me watching more k-dramas, including, eventually, It's Okay, That's Love, starring Do Kyungsoo, also known as EXO’s D.O. I was curious about what he’d be like as a musical performer, and the rest is history. So, what I’m saying is, Lee Seung Gi set off a chain reaction that led to me eventually recapping his own performance as host of this show. The circle is complete.

Lee Seung-gi (born 1987) has been a singer, specifically a solo artist, as well as an actor, since 2004. He’s like Rain, but not as irritating. He hasn’t made much money from it because of his agency stealing from him. In fact, in April of 2023, a law was passed called “the Lee Seung-gi Incident Prevention Act” which requires entertainment companies to disclose their earnings settlement details to their celebrities at least once a year. Seems like a good thing to do. He’s still in demand, I’m sure, and quite loved, so he’ll land on his feet no matter what. Seung-gi, fighting!!

Ok, back to the show! Seung-gi explains how to vote, which we can skip -- the only info of note is that only Koreans could vote back then, quite different from the modern era -- and go to about 5:30 for an extremely bombastic set reveal.

5:49 The girls start to walk in

Note: All ages given are the (international) ages of the girls at the start of the series.

The first three to walk in are the Yuehua trainees.

Left to right: Yiren, Sihyeon, Yena

Kim Si Hyeon (김시현), age 18, in the pinky/purpley long sleeved shirt

She was also on Produce 101 (first season) as a “kaein” (individual/no-agency) trainee, where she did pretty well (made it to episode 8), but didn’t necessarily stand out. After this show, she debuted as part of Everglow, where she performs under her real name and is currently the leader, as well as a visual and “face of the group.”

Choi Ye Na (최예나), age 18, with her hair in a ponytail. We’ll be seeing a lot of her this episode!

Wang Yi Ren (왕이런), age 17, pink shirt with black edges, statement belt

She is actually Chinese, though she speaks Korean pretty fluently. You probably know her now as a member of Everglow, where she is lead dancer as well as a visual and also the “face of the group.” How many faces can a group have? Also, isn’t Mia the face of the group, as well as the body and the voice and the feet and the hands? Sigh. I really like Everglow. We just… all know the drill with line distribution and center time.

They come in and exclaim how pretty and shiny the set is and say “daebak” a lot. They sit down in a row along the top, and faintly, in the distance, Bon Bon Chocolate begins to form in a songwriter’s head.

Next in is Kim Min Ju (김민주) from Urban Works. She’s 17. She was a child actress before the show. The others are impressed that she’s here by herself and that she’s very pretty.

I love how in Korea having a small face is a compliment.

She goes to sit in the first place seat, then changes her mind and chooses 5th place instead so she doesn’t have to sit up so high.

Up next is YG Kplus, a modeling agency not to be confused with regular YG, the agency that is home to Blackpink and Treasure. The trainees are Ahn Ye Won (안예원), age 17, and Choi Yeon Soo (최연수), age 19. Yeon Soo has a celebrity chef for a father but doesn’t want to just be another nepo baby. She has the black skirt, while her label-mate Ye Won is in all red. They walk in to the strains of Blurred Lines (🤢) and the other girls exclaim jealously about how tall they are. Yewon is 172 cm and Yeonsoo is 170 cm, making them both about 5’6.

Next in is a group from CNC School, featuring some familiar faces!

Left to right: Kim Yubin, Kim Da Yeon, Lee YuJeong, Yoon Eun Bin, Hong Ye Ji

Kim Yu Bin (김유빈) is 16.

Kim Da Yeon (김다연) is 15 and you may know her (now) from GirlsPlanet999 and Kep1er. Aww, this is before she got her teeth done! She’s adorable. I am a Dayeon apologist and will hear no words against her.

Lee Yu Jeong (이유정) is 14 and you may know her (now) from Lightsum.

Yoon Eun Bin (윤은빈) is 14.

Hong Ye Ji (홍예지) is 16.

Yena thinks that the CNC girls look like babies. I think she looks like a baby! And this old lady I tutored today told me that *I* look like a baby. So I guess everyone is a baby.

Next is MMO, home to the sexy Kang Daniel, everyone’s fave from Produce101 Season 2 (often called “Broduce101”). The mere mention of his name sends Yena into a tizzy. I mean, low key same (though I’m more of an Ong Seungwoo fan [though not enough to watch his Pepsi commercial omg what was that?!?]). Anyway, out comes MMO’s Won Seo Yeon (원서연), age 18, a cute girl with a nice low voice and a pretty blue outfit. She seems worried about living up to her sunbae’s success.

Next comes pretty, big eyed Ko Yu Jin (고유진), age 17. She’s from Blockberry Creative, and the Orbits out there are now resisting the urge to smash their device screen at the mere mention of that agency! [Side note: Sensitive is a great song even if Loosemble is a terrible group name. Check out the song, forgive the name.] She’s in a cute striped shirt and interviews that her role models are Taeyon and HyunA, and you know, same.

The girls in the retro polka dot dresses are from How Entertainment.

Yu Min Young (유민영) is 18, in the mint green. Kim Min Seo (김민서) is 15, in the yellow and is a Jeon Somi fan, as are we all. Wang Ke (왕크어) is 17, Chinese, and in the red.

The next group, in white tops and black booty shorts, is from MND17 Agency.

Left to right, they are:

Park Chan Ju (박찬주), unknown age. She has the tightest shirt.

Park Min Ji (박민지), age 19, was also on Produce 101 and now (2023) is in Secret Number. She has the floofiest shirt and says she likes ChungHa, which, I mean, don’t we all, but also it’s kind of funny since she was on Produce101 with her so they probably kind of know each other.

Lee Chae Jeong (이채정), age 18, who now (2023) is in a group called Alice (formerly known as Elris).

Another girl comes out in a big yellow shirt with purple… shorts? A skirt? Unclear. She is from an agency called A -team and is named Kim Cho Yeon (김초연), age 16. After this show she was in Bugaboo, a group that has since disbanded but certainly has its adherents. She also likes Chung-Ha, so much so that she also wants to be in fourth place just like her. Also, MNET hates her. HATES HER SOOOOO MUCH.

Next out is someone from MNH Entertainment, the horrible agency that utterly mismanaged poor beautiful Chung-Ha for years. (Sihyeon, who must be practicing for later, says in Japanese that she loves Chung-Ha.)

The MNH trainee is little Lee Ha Eun (이하은), who, at 13, is the youngest on the show. She’s adorable, the way a little kid is adorable, and in a meeting with Chung-Ha herself, we see that little Haeun obviously almost worships Chung-Ha. Chug-Ha tells her to be herself and people will love her. Will this prove accurate? You’ll have to keep watching to find out! As Haeun seats herself amongst all her pretty unnies, she interviews, “This place is very pressuring.” I can’t imagine being in 8th grade and on a show like this. I don’t know how I made it to and from school every day when I was in 8th grade. I don’t know how I continued to like, breathe oxygen and use it in a redox reaction in my body without screwing that up and exploding.

Side note to my loves in middle school who may be reading this: First of all, how dare you, this is for grownups, and secondly, go ahead and read anyway. Matt Groening, creator of the Simpsons, famously said “Middle school is the deepest pit in hell” and yeah, it is. So, please know that I love you. You can do this. It’s going to be rough, can’t lie, but it does keep getting a bit better. Please don’t let these years matter all that much to you. Don’t let it scar you. You’ll get through this by just trying to have as much fun as you can and not caring about crushes and whether or not they have a crush on you, or whether other kids are being nice or mean or whatever dumb middle school shit they’re pulling on you. It doesn’t matter. Just enjoy life and be as happy as possible. Once you get older, you get to decide on the kind of adult you want to be, and if you want to surround yourself with Squishmallows and watch kpop videos with all your free time, you can. Or whatever makes you happy. Hold on. You got this. Now, back to the recap.

Yena chats a lot with her friend Sihyeon, and the editors keep showing them. Yena’s charismatic and it’s fun to get her perspective. They’re sitting in those big chairs that are kind of far apart, so she has to lean way over to do it. They are talking about how they’re excited to collaborate with the Japanese girls, and that they’re excited. Yiren grins widely as she says she want to make friends with the Japanese girls. I’ve already seen more charm and cuteness out of Yiren than I have in any given Everglow video. She’s really engaging in real life -- wish we got to see a bit more of that during her performances.

Kim Dayeon is sharing what she knows about Japanese language with her teammates, but her pronunciation is a little sus.

Stone Music is up next. The four girls come out nervously, and the other girls in the audience think they look familiar.

Left to right, they are:

Jang Gyu Ri (장규리), age 20, in pink.

Jo Yu Ri (조유리), age 16, in yellow.

Lee Si An (이시안), age 19, in purple.

Bae Eun Yeong (배은영), age 21, in mint green.

All four had already appeared on a different MNET reality competition show called Idol School, which had aired the year before this show aired. What’s interesting is that Gyuri actually *won* that show and debuted as a member of its winning group, fromis_9. A lot of famous folk were on Idol School, including a personal favorite of mine, Natty (who has since debuted in the absolutely phenomenal group Kiss of Life). I’m starting to think I should go back and watch Idol School! Anyway, that’s for another day.

Next out is Cube -- everyone is very excited since Cube is a larger agency. Han Cho Won (한초원), a tall mature looking 15-year-old in a hoodie and red pants, comes out to the strains of (then) Cube artist HyunA’s “Lip and Hip.” She squints at the audience, trying to decide where to sit, and while she does that, I’ll tell you that now (2023), Chowon is in a group called Lightsum. The other girls think she’s cool and swaggy, but to me she just looks a little confused. Maybe she has bad distance vision.

Next out is FNC, home of N.Flying and AOA. (If you watched Queendom Puzzle, you might remember Chanmi/DoHwa, who used to be in AOA.) We meet Cho Ah Yeong (조아영), age 16, wearing black, and Park Hae Yoon (박해윤), age 22, wearing white. HaeYoon has since debuted as a member of Cherry Bullet. Everyone seems to be very intimidated that they’re from FNC, but me, an intellectual in the year 2023, is thinking, yeah, but no. As far as I’m concerned, FNC stands for “FuckiNg over Cherry bullet” and if you’re like, but BPR-Unnie, that doesn’t really work as an acronym, I respond, EXACTLY. Nothing about FNC works.

People are excited to meet the Starship trainees, and MNET definitely wants all of us to be excited too. And I mean. Yeah. Here they come:

Left to right: Yujin, Kahyeon, Wonyoung

An Yu Jin (안유진), age 14, in the sleeveless shirt. She had previously been in music videos and commercials.

Jang Won Young (장원영), age 13, the tallest one, in the pants

Cho Ka Hyeon (조가현), age 14, in the collared shirt and skirt

Nothing against Kahyeon, who is a lovely and talented girl, but it’s hard not to focus on the one-two punch of Yujin and Wonyoung, future stars of IVE. It’s entirely possible you’re reading this recap just because you’re fans of one or other of them. I’ll say that I’m more of a Yujin girl than a Wonyoung girl, but I like them both. True to form, they’re boisterous, showing off their smattering of Japanese knowledge, and flirting with the camera. They take turns sitting in the number one seat briefly, and then choose other seats.

The trainees are talking about how pretty everyone is, much prettier than in Season 1, and I disagree with that part, but yeah of course they’re all pretty. Yoon Eun Bin laments that she’s “the only ugly one.” Aww, baby! And of course, we keep checking in with Yena, our unofficial narrator of this episode, as she jokes non-stop with her friend Sihyeon. It kind of reminds me of how in Broduce 101 we hung out with Kang Daniel and Yoon Ji-sung for most of episode 1.

Out next is Pledis:

Who could these tall, beautiful girls be?

Huh Yun Jin (허윤진), 16, with her hair up in a ponytail, is about 5’8. Her family name 허 is sometimes transliterated “Huh” and sometimes “Heo”. Korean vowels are hard, ya’ll.

Lee Ga Eun (이가은), 23, with her shorter hair down to just her shoulders, is about 5’7. Her name is also sometimes transliterated as Kaeun.

The others girls recognize Gaeun as a former member of After School, an idol group known for their sexy concepts. (In the performance I linked to, Gaeun is the one with her hair in two braided pigtails -- she starts off on the pole on the far left. We actually see a brief clip of that performance on this episode at about 20:58.) The girls are abuzz to see Gaeun back in the idol sphere after a few years’ hiatus. That hiatus was just due to Pledis’s mismanagement. Shock! Horror! Who would have thought that PLEDIS of all companies would screw over a talented idol group? Surely, neither of THESE girls will get screwed over on this very show?

Anyway, back to 2018. You’re going to have to accept that fact that I love both of these girls a lot, but I doubt that will be a problem, because I think you’re going to love them too. Most people do -- more about that much later! Yunjin is one of the reasons that I’m rewatching this show -- I loved her the whole time I watched it the first time, as I said earlier, and I was so incredibly happy when she debuted in Le Sserafim.

The two Pledis girls sit down and we have a brief “coming up!” montage. When we come back, we can see that more girls have come in unobserved by us, the viewers, which is fine. Finally, strains of Heavy Rotation by AKB48 begin playing (“I want youuuuuuu… I need youuuuuuu…”), and the Korean girls are excited to meet the AKB girls!

First, we learn a little bit about the franchise -- it’s like, what if a female NCT, or a TripleS, but with literally 600 members, and they’re all wearing outfits that make them look like they are members of the Piñata Marine Corps. Also, most of them can’t really sing and their choreography is mostly step-touch wiggle-wiggle.

Bless their hearts.

There is, obviously, talent amongst them, as we will see. It’s just that talent is not really a *requirement* for being in the group. Girls in the AKB48 franchise are expected to be cute and cheery on stage, to approximate some form of “singing” like noises, and to learn and do choreography so easy even I could probably do it, and I’m about as coordinated as a newborn deer. Plenty of them are capable of more, and I take my hat off to those who pushed themselves to come on this show and face this challenge. They’re in for a lot, and I respect them.

I also want to say that the biggest issue I have with the AKB48 franchise is that their fanbase is almost exclusively men in their 40s who think that 19 or 20 is over the hill. It’s like, soft-core kitty-corn and I know you know what I mean. I guess a similar allegation could be made about Produce101 in general. I don’t want to linger on this for too long because these girls just want to be entertainers and to bring some fun and excitement into their lives, and it’s not their fault that middle-aged men ruin everything. But I have to acknowledge it. I could post some really disturbing pictures here of AKB48 girls in outfits that read *really, really young* but also are obviously meant to be sexy, but I really don’t want to, in part because it might make the FBI knock on my door. Similarly, I don’t want to link to it here but I’m amazed there wasn’t a public outcry about the video for Heavy Rotation. They’re all in lingerie and rolling around together and kissing each other and bathing in a bathtub together while feeding each other cherries and whipped cream. Like, it’s not subtle. Meanwhile the song itself sounds like something from a Kidz Bop album. The juxtaposition between the cutesy childish tone and the obviously sexy, almost pornographic images is really… disturbing, there’s just no other word for it. Add in the fact that Japan might be the only developed country that’s worse than the USA in terms of how it treats and cares for women, and you’ve got a pressure cooker of ick. Poor girls. I hope they’re all safe and well -- in 2018, in 2023, and beyond.

And here they come, all 19 of the AKB48 girls, in red and black plaid outfits. This specific group is from Tokyo. (Each of the -48 groups is based in a different city.) We’ll meet these girls a bit later when they perform in smaller groups.

We see that one of them, 24-year-old Miyazaki Miho, can even write in Korean a little! Good for her. Takahashi Juri -- 20-year-old future member of Rocket Punch and visitor to Queendom Puzzle -- interviews in Japanese, “I think that the popular idol singers in Korea are really the best artists in the world.” Goto Moe, 17, says that Kpop idols are true musicians. Muto Tomu, a 23 year old palindrome, says she wants to learn from the Korean idols. She and Juri want to be the best in the world. Yes! I love the ambition.

But where will they sit?

Juri, in an outfit that would make Nina Garcia weep if she had tear ducts, is tempted by the number one seat. As she should be. We love Juri in this household. But the girls’ competitiveness gives way to their friendliness, and soon all the girls, Korean and Japanese alike, are giggling and waving and making heart signs to each other. AND THAT IS WHAT I’M HERE TO WATCH, by the way. I love this shit. Friendship is the best ship.

Juri introduces herself to MND17’s ChaeJeong in careful Korean, and ChaeJeong responds in equally careful Japanese. Everyone is using the few words they know, combined with sign language and body language, to try to bridge the communication gap. They exchange hellos and names and try to figure out who’s older. The Japanese girls think the Korean system of adding a year to your age is kind of odd, but that’s how culture do.

Next out are the girls from NMB48 - the Osaka team -- in blue outfits. Then the two SKE48 girls, from Nagoya come out, in different blue outfits. One of these two is Matsui Jurina, who is only 21 but somehow looks a bit older to me.

Asai Yuka on the left, Jurina on the right.

A lot of the girls recognize Jurina; per Wikipedia, “She is recognized as SKE48's absolute "ace", having placed in the top 10 in many of AKB48's annual general elections and winning the 2018 election.” Apparently she was in AKB48 for a while, and then chose to go back to SKE48, either for altruistic reasons (to support the smaller subunit’s success) or for her own reasons (to go back to her home city, perhaps).

You’ll be hearing more about “elections”, so let me talk about that. In the -48 system, fans who have bought a copy of a 48 album are given the right to vote for the member they like best -- the general election. In other words, it’s a popularity contest, and only fans willing to spend money are allowed to vote. (There’s a story about a fan who spent $300,000 on CDs to vote for his favorite girl!) If Jurina has won so many elections, she is/was undoubtedly quite loved by her fan base. I approve of the fact that this woman, who looks like a woman and not a little kid, is/was so loved.

Side note here, and it’s a real, real, real side note, so I'm putting it in a different color so you can skip past it if you want, but the story of the man who spent $300,000 to vote for his favorite member of AKB48 reminds me a bit of the story of Grant Amato. Let me explain. Grant Amato was in his late 20s when his life hit the skids for various reasons and he began spending a ton of time in a cam girl chat room. He began “tipping” her absurd amounts of money, convinced that this was creating a genuine bond between himself and her. He began stealing from anyone who left their credit cards in his vicinity, especially his parents, from whom he stole $200,000 or more. The family tried to put him in rehab, and told him he couldn’t talk to his “girlfriend” any more -- so he killed them, in part to remove the obstacle, and in part to get their money. Looking into this story more, I learned more about the psychology of tipping cam girls, and it seems really similar to the parasocial relationship between -48 girls and their fans. No other men in the girls’ lives; the illusion of sexy, available youth; the man feeling like a protector or guardian of the girl he's never met and never will meet…. This extremely NSFW guide to cam-girling has a lot of nuggets of wisdom, especially this: “A man wants to feel attention from an attractive women on him, and this is made even more satisfying when it’s to the exclusion of those around him. He is showing off his power by buying your happiness.” I know that Grant Amato is an extreme example when it comes to him literally murdering three family members, but other people -- nearly always men -- spend that much money on cam girls and on AKB girls and on other stand-ins for real love. I don’t have some big point to make here. Just that it doesn’t seem particularly healthy to me.

Pigtailed Sato Minami, age 14 and a member of Tokyo based AKB48, interviews that everyone in Japan knows Jurina. 17-year old Nakano Ikumi says she joined AKB48 because she idolizes her, and 14-year old Asai Yuka, the other SKE48 member in Produce48, says that they all admire her.

They aren’t sure where to sit, as now only lower-ranked chairs are available, which is so silly since it doesn’t actually matter at all what chair you sit on today, but that’s the show for you. Jurina, befuddled, says “ehhhh?” which is sort of like “what” and sort of like “otoke?” It’s so characteristically Japanese that some of the Korean girls think it’s cute. Plus, they’re all eager to make friends.

Jurina smiles with cute, puppy eyes, and then for a moment, a bit of avarice flashes over her face, and the xenophobic MNET editors make sure to zoom in on her, while letting one of the other girls give her a defining caption:

Bombastic opera music plays -- will she take the seat? She has been ranked number one enough times in her other life that it seems kind of fitting. But no. She ends up sitting down in a normal chair, interviewing that she didn’t have the courage. I don’t remember who sat in the number one seat and am starting to think it might just be whoever walks in last at this point.

I feel like I could write a whole sociological paper about the difference between girl seasons of this show and boy seasons of this show and their approach to the Number One Chair. Girls eye it but don’t like to sit on it because it marks them as greedy and makes them unpopular. Boys fight over it, either physically with arm wrestling or via skill displays, like rutting caribou. It’s really interesting.

Interlude! They’re all hungry. Juri shows off more of her Korean skills. The other girls at least know how to say the names of food and are building friendship off of a shared love of eating. Hey, that’s how you make friends with a cat or dog so it works for me. Food!

Here’s the RBW girls, who you might recognize:

Na Go Eun (나고은), in the “Respect” shirt, age 18. She is now a main vocalist of PurpleKiss.

Park Ji Eun (박지은), in the red striped shirt, age 20. She debuted in PurpleKiss but left due to an anxiety condition. Aww! Poor sweetie. Hope she’s doing ok these days.

The girls are excited for Banana Culture, partly because they’re hungry and want to eat bananas, and partly because it’s home to EXID, a group I’ve always liked too.

Out come the two Banana Culture girls, who sit down immediately:

Kim Da Hye (김다혜), on the left with black accents, who I think is 16 (but reports vary).

Kim Na Young(김나영), 15, on the right with red accents, who you may now recognize as a member of Lightsum.

Next is Woolim, and the other trainees are impressed. They should be! Check out these four:

I know this screen shot is terrible, but I’m doing my best, folks.

Left to right, that’s:

Kim So Hee (김소희), 14, who is now in Rocket Punch.

Kim Chae Won (김채원), 17, who is now in Le Sserafim.

Kwon Eun Bi (권은비), 22, who is now a soloist.

Kim Su Yun (김수윤),17, who is now also in Rocket Punch, and who you may also recognize from going on Queendom puzzle. She’s 5’7, if you’re wondering.

I’m so excited to see Sohee and Suyun meet Juri! And for Chaewon and THE SAKURA™ and Yunjin to all meet each other! This is going to be so cute.

And here’s WM Entertainment:

Left to right, that’s:

Cho Yeong In (조영인), age 16.

Lee Chae Yeon (이채연), age 18. Before this she was on Sixteen, the show that created Twice, and after this she will, among other things, make a brief appearance on Queendom Puzzle. She’s also the older sister of Itzy’s Chaeryeong, and they have a strong family resemblance. Everyone is pretty impressed by her, and I’m sure she’s glad about that.

Lee Seung Hyeon (이승현), age 17. Ok, if you watched Queendom Puzzle, I dare you to try to recognize Seung Hyeon. Do you know who she is? Picture her with chin length hair. Hold your finger up to the screen and really try. Ok, give up?

That’s Riina from H1-Key! I would have never guessed. I wonder if Chaeyeon recognized her on Queendom Puzzle? I wonder if she voted her up or down? Chaeyeon does seem to sort of do her own thing. Love how the show never mentioned that they knew each other.

It’s time for the Fukuoka-based HKT48 girls to enter, and their black logo prompts Million Market’s Son Eun Chae (손은채), 18, future member of Bugaboo, to comment to her label mate Cho Sa Rang (조사랑), 14, that black is her favorite color. Sarang replies, “Our faces must look black by now,” cracking Eunchae up. Aw, I like them.

The other Japanese girls are excited, because they know that soon they will be seeing…. THE SAKURA™. Her name means cherry blossom, and she wants cherry blossoms to blossom in your cherry. I mean heart. Whatever.

It’s always so odd to me the way that certain girls are picked out as stunningly beautiful, when to me they’re all pretty. It feels so random. Why is THE SAKURA™specifically the most beautiful? It’s like in Red Velvet. I think Seulgi and Wendy are every bit as pretty as Irene, maybe prettier. But what do I know? Also, I probably ranted about this exact same thing in one of my BP recaps. Anyway, Jo Yuri tells her labelmate Sian, “I made eye contact with Sakura and I almost fainted.” Ok, Jo Yuri is growing on me.

Everyone thinks everyone else is pretty, and cool, and cute, and intimidating. We check in again with Sarang and Eunchae, who seem to be having a fun time.

Who will be last to walk in? YG’s logo pops up on screen, shocking everyone, including our polka dotted friends from HOW Entertainment, one of whom is in the process of administering eye drops to another one when the logo pops up. YG? WUT? But no -- these are *former* YG trainees. Now, they’re here as “kaein yeonshipsaeng” -- individual trainees. Trainer-less trainees. Just… -ees. They walk out to strains of “I am the Best” by 2NE1, a song whose video I still watch whenever I need a pick-me-up.

Park Jinny (박진희), 20, with dark hair, now a member of Secret Number.

Park Seo Young (박서영), 19, with light hair.

We cut back to an interview that must have taken place some time before taping began, when Seoyeong had brown hair. We find out that Seoyeoung was in the famous “Future 2NE1” video and both of them traineed with Blackpink. They’re here to make you wonder why YG let them go.

There are only two chairs left -- the #1 seat and the #96 seat. The now-blonde Seoyeong plunks down on the number one seat and everyone applauds. When I watched it the first time, I thought even at the time that there wasn’t much chance of her making it after that. You just can’t sit in that seat and make it in to the final lineup. I’m with Yunjin, who says, “If that was the only seat left, I’d sit on the floor.” Yep.

35:10 Somi and Daniel

Two figures emerge and the girls go nuts as they recognize everyone’s favorites, Jeon Somi (ranked #1 on PD101 Season 1) and Kang Daniel (ranked #1 on PD101 Season 2). I’m happy to see them, though I’ll note that they’re both capable of looking a lot better than they do here. I’ll blame their hair -- they were both born to be honey blondes, even if it wasn’t in their DNA.

Must be kind of weird for Chaeyeong to see Somi again after they both competed on Sixteen together. But there are always all those ties amongst idols and trainees.

Somi and Daniel talk about how only viewer votes will matter here. They don’t know that this is a lie, of course. Vote rigging was absolutely a thing on all four seasons of PD101. But we’ll talk about that later.

The reality sets in for the trainees -- they’re really on PD101! Or PD48, whatever you want to call it. S&D talk about how only the top producers will work with them, how they’ll debut in Korea and Japan at the same time -- this will be big. They talk about the specific producers, who have worked with some top groups, but the names of the producers don’t ring bells for me and likely won’t for you, either: Han Sung Soo, who writes kpop hits, and Akimoto Yasushi, the creepy old dude who created AKB48 and writes their most misogynistic lyrics. Great. I am just going to call him “Gross Guy” from now on.

The girls find out that 12 of them will debut in the final lineup, which is great news, because now it’s a 1 in 8 chance of getting in. (Well, it’s a 100% chance for those whose agencies paid enough money!) Why couldn’t Kep1er and ZB1 have had 12 members? Then Park Hanbin would have been in ZB1 and I’m not sure who else would have been in Kep1er but I know it would have been great. Maybe Fu Yaning, who I will always love and hear no words against.

Anyway.

Say goodbye to Somi and Daniel because we don't see them again after this. It's time for the judges to come out! And that's what we'll pick up with next time, when we recap the first ten auditions!

#produce 48 #IZ*one #Jeon Somi #Kang Daniel #Lee Chaeyeong #Le Sserafim #IVE #BPR recaps P48 #Sakura #akb48 #rocket punch

11 notes · View notes