#rly high hopes for this one tho!!!
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roostertuftart · 4 months ago
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Sigh back on my cat bullshit again
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wabblebees · 10 months ago
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#have been attempting to make a self-tape for this audition for DAYS#after a whole helluva lotta bullshit having to do with hunting down a time+space+camera to film with i Finally managed to get some takes#then some weird bullshit with the camera's sd card happened where i wasnt able to pull the files off onto my laptop#FINALLY able to copy the files to my laptop. FINALLY able to access playback (the video camera i borrowed wouldnt let me access its gallery#FINALLY watching them... they all kinda suck so far but thats Fine at least i Have Them yk#get to take 7 and its actually not nearly as terrible as the previous 6!! feelin pretty good abt this one!! dont get hopes too high ofc but#i mean hey this ones acceptable if the last few arent any good either & just in case i cant go thru with my plans for tmrw to do a reshoot#so yk i start to rename the file so i can tell which clip it is!#Whole Laptop Crashes#WAHOO#typed this up to avoid freakin out while carefully rebooting her. bbg dont do this to me#luckily i already saved multiple contingency copies just in case (bc ive already had so many issues i was feelin Extra Cautious)#so i at least dont have to worry about dealing with the sd card bullshit Again. ugh#EDITING TO SAY: SHE LIVES!! laptop is fine after powering back up & files are unscathed!! was able to retitle & keep on truckin no problem#god i hate dealing with video as a medium#*this* is why im a stage performer not a screen actor lmao#fuck this shit. juust gimme a floor and an audience and ill make it worrk#cameras are fickle creatures on-par with printer machines#im rly excitednervous abt this audition tho; only submitted my resume+headshot on a whim & didnt rly think anything would come of it#but they contacted me and asked for a tape!! so im like !!!!! okayy sure id love to send that !!! i just have to face The Horrors first#if i dont get it then thats not the end of the world or anyth; but itd be SO FUCKING COOL if my v first submission landed me my first gig!!#so uhh. pls put out a good thought to the universe for my self-tape landing me the chance to perform in this queer play festival !!#bee speaks#🤞🤞🤞
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volfoss · 10 months ago
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finished the two short stories i needed to translate and summarize so :) thats exciting :) and then after that... i gotta write up my thoughts on everything and then make the most absurd tws known to man on my post :3 AND THEN. tomorrow :3 i get to start the devil of the earth (which. info link here). it is gonna be awesome minus being untranslated but i stay silly ok
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faaun · 2 years ago
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eye pain is the WORST kind . worse than teeth even maybe
#esp when u cant rub ur eyes or itll maoe things worse#typing this w my eyes closed i hope it is comprehensible#anyway whwt the FUCK i am in so much pain from one eye only and its like . im aftaid#the flap they made during frmto lasik has moved or smthb. and itll wont end#bc whenever i open my eyes/blink iy is painful#resolved to do that very rarely . anyway eave me x . avcording to my doctor/surgeon i actually had#a scar that was imperceptible initially on each eye and thats why thos whole thing has been so#excruciatingly painful . like apparently ur notnsupposed to rly feel anythiny in femto lasik but it was#literally the worst pain i have ever felt in my whole life (i have a rly high pain tolerebce due to reasons);#anyway i have a feeling this may be due to the wounds/scars too idk...#also i had fat grafting to fill in my under eyes and like . it was suchba slight procedure and was done when i was under#anaesthesia for another procedure...that i forgot abt it. bc i dont rly touch my under eyes. anyway during lasik they#use this device which puts pressure around ur eye sockets which ahould have been fine#but it was putting a lot of pressure on a newly grafted area of my face and i was like . oh i see ! i want to scream !!!!!#but i couldnt say anything bc it was cutting a hole in my eyes and i was like yeah talking rn is a bad idea. but afterwards the nurse was#like . you look like you are literally going to pass out oh my god are you ok ?? and i told her abt the under eye thing and she was like.#YOUBSHOULD HAVE SAID THAT EARLIER like yeah ik im sorry 😭#personal#anyway lol its fine i just want to rub my left eye sooooo bad it is so . annoying /painful UGH
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phagodyke · 5 months ago
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didn't realise but we have an audit today 🫣
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tariah23 · 1 year ago
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Gege is still bogus asl for how he treated Megumi’s sister because my ass I really thought that she was gonna be important to the story somehow.
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miss-floral-thief · 1 year ago
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not dead/burnt yet 👍
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bumpscosity · 1 year ago
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And the collection grows once more
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oizysian · 3 months ago
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Pookiee its me againn
I love love loveddd the justice you gave into my last request.
Can you do a fic with Lizzie with a breeding kink? Something along the lines of “I’m gonna make you such a good mommy for me” or “I’m gonna fill you up with my babies like a good little housewife” either way I know you’d make it good. Please and thank you ml😋
Fill Me Up | Elizabeth Olsen
Pairing: Elizabeth Olsen x Fem!Reader
Warnings: breeding, dirty talk
Word count: ~300
AN: Hey bestie! I hope you enjoy this one too! (Even tho it’s rly rly short)
Lizzie’s hand wrapped around my neck, squeezing slightly to put pressure on my throat. I moaned under her grip, raising my hips to meet hers as she pounded into me.
“I’m gonna breed you so good, baby.” She spoke softly, panting as she fucked me. “You’re gonna be such a good mommy for my babies.”
“Oh, fuck, Lizzie,” I moaned, looking up into her eyes. “Please.”
“Beg for my cum. Beg for my babies.”
“Please, Lizzie, fill me up.” I whimpered. “Fuck your babies into me.”
She let out a low moan, her grip on my neck loosening as her thrusts became more powerful.
“I’m gonna cum, baby, are you close?”
“Yes,” I dug my nails into her back. “I’m so close.”
She let her hand slide down from my neck to my chest, then down my belly to the apex of my thighs where she played with my clit. I felt the coil in my belly tighten as she touched me and I pulled her closer to me.
“Cum with me.” I begged her. “I’m gonna milk you dry.”
“Oh, fuck.” She groaned, resting her forehead against my own as she brought me to release.
I came against her, squeezing the cock between her legs. She let me ride out my high before bringing her hand down and gripping the balls of the cock, spurting her cum into me. I let out a moan as I felt her coating my insides, wrapping my legs around her and holding her close.
She continued to fuck her cum into me, cumming herself as the base of the cock rubbed against her clit. Her jaw fell slack and I grabbed her face, bringing her down so I could kiss her. She responded back in full, biting down gently on my bottom lip and kissing me passionately.
She whispered against my lips, “I wanna fuck you like this more often.”
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mimikyuno · 4 months ago
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my yuriful summer 2024 watchlist 🏖️☀️
now that i checked out the first episode of all the yuriful shows i was keeping an eye on, here’s my first thoughts and impressions
Mayonaka Punch
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tags: comedy, supernatural, vampire
thoughts on episode 1: LOVED IT SO SO MUCH!!! i love the mc already she’s such a mess and i already love the dynamic between her and the raging vampire lesbian. my favorite from the ones on this list tbh!! need more cancelled youtubers and horny for blood lesbian vampires. also i have a weak spot for anime with adult characters who can drink alcohol and get wasted lol. WILL be watching EAGERLY.
yuri thoughts 🌸: the yuri looks solid!! there was verbal mention of lesbian romantic feelings. and as in most vampire shows, blood drinking is metaphor for sex but it’s made quite explicit in this one which increases the yuri score. the protagonists have already a v interesting dynamic im invested.
(EDIT) POST EP 3 THOUGHTS: i love this one more and more!!! still my fave out of these 5 for some reason? i just like masaki and live’s dynamic a lot, i hope they kiss
(EDIT) ALMOST END OF THE SEASON UPDATE: only one of these im still watching lmao ep 9 and 10 were really good! i hope masaki and live make out by the end. yuki best girl
Na Nare Hana Nare
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tags: sports
thoughts on episode 1: LOVE the colors and art style in this one! love that there’s a girl in a wheelchair!! love the brazilian girl who keeps kissing everyone!! the parkour girl is turbo autistic fr… also a ninja lmao. im v interested in this tbh!! will be watching.
yuri thoughts 🌸: im v interested in the possible yuriful dynamics, especially between the girl in a wheelchair and mc, and between parkour ninja autistic and tall girl. i think the brazilian girl and girl who follows her around are also supposed to be shipped.
(EDIT) POST EP 3 THOUGHTS: yeppp turbo autism ninja is a huge lesbian i love her sm 💌. very sweet show!
(EDIT) ALMOST END OF THE SEASON UPDATE: on hold. it got quite boring at the ep 5 mark and i cant will myself to continue. might drop
Senpai was Otokonoko
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tags: crossdressing, love polygon, romance, school
thoughts on episode 1: this counts as yuriful and i Will fight u on this. bisexual girl x closeted trans girl x closeted gay childhood friend love triangle? discussions of gender identity? yes pls. will be continuing it!!
yuri thoughts 🌸: makoto and aoi are cute 🥹
(EDIT) POST EP 3 THOUGHTS: idc about whatever happens later on, makoto is a trans girl, episode 2 and 3 are an insane confirmation. even if she never breaks through her eggshell throughout the whole series, she’s trans. no like fr. i love her so so much and i hope she’ll be able to transition (either at the end of the series or afterwards). egg of the season 🥚🏳️‍⚧️
(EDIT) ALMOST END OF THE SEASON UPDATE: meh. dropped lmao
Shikanoko Nokonoko Koshitantan
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tags: comedy, gag humor, school
thoughts on episode 1: “shiiiika 🦌!!!” okay y’all know i love me some gag humor anime but tbqh im feeling kinda lukewarm on this one. maybe it’s bc i had rly high expectations for this but idk most of the gags did not hit as nice as i hoped. tho some of them were brilliant (also looove the constant breaking of the fourth wall). not looking forward to the siscon character that’s gonna be introduced. will be continuing but might drop if i get bored. however i loved how they Did mention that only male deer have horns sooo… noko transbian 🦌🏳️‍⚧️?
yuri thoughts 🌸: the two protagonists have great yuri potential!! torako has already shown she’s a huge girl kisser and noko just keeps teasing her, which is a great dynamic imo. also torako’s va is hatsune miku’s voice provider, and we all know hatsune miku is transbian goddess so!
(EDIT) POST EP 3 THOUGHTS: okay nvm i actually love this!!!!!! and the siscon character is such a caricature and parody of the siscon trope that i love her too (also she’s voiced by mafuyu project sekai uwu).
(EDIT) ALMOST END OF THE SEASON UPDATE: dropped lmao (gags got boring, i have seen too many similar shows)
VTuber Nandaga Haishin Kiri Wasuretara Densetsu ni Natteta
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tags: comedy, otaku culture
thoughts on episode 1: once again maybe unpopular opinion but im not completely sold on this one. yes it’s fun, yes she’s unhinged, yes they’re all absolutely raging homosexuals BUT idk how to explain it but it feels very much male oriented. idk i think i feel this way bc it’s my personal pet peeve when otaku shows focus mostly on men as the intended audience (for example, when they showed her audience, all the viewers were men which like. they could have shown at least one woman who likes watching her videos yknow?). so anyway. at least it’s incredibly gay? and once again, love characters gettinf drunk lol. but idk i feel like this was made to ride the wave of hololive and get men on twitter to share funny clips idk. i like how they use actual vtuber avatars in certain scenes, and i get the vibe they’ll want to make these girls real vtubers, hence why we dont see what they actually look like but just their vtuber persona. will be checking out more ep but will drop if it gets too meh.
yuri thoughts 🌸: as mentioned, all the girls are RAGING homosexuals fr. asking about favorite lesbian porn scenarios to each other to possibly act them out. hello?!
(EDIT) POST EP 3 THOUGHTS: again nvm, i like this one too now lmao tho i’d rank it last out of these 5 tbh. but it’s so unhinged and deranged that it’s a super fun watch
(EDIT) ALMOST END OF THE SEASON UPDATE: the wii fit -like episode was the last drop. burnt braincells i’ll never grow back. dropped byeee 0/10
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heart4gyu · 9 months ago
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just for show pt.2 || mc!heeseung x ‪mc‬!reader
PT.1 || PT.3 || note: i honestly didn’t know where i wanted the story to go so let me know your thoughts guys! it rly motivates me when you guys have something to say abt my writing… i think i like it & ofc this definitely leaves room for a pt.3 (lmk ??) hope you guys enjoy tho ^_^!
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the longer you thought about it the more you realized it really wasn’t heeseung’s fault. it wasn’t his fault that everyone did react so well to everything the two of you did. and it wasn’t his fault that you caught yourself falling for his kindness.
you weren’t in love with him or anything, so why was the thought of his possible rejection so… heartbreaking. maybe it was the embarrassment of falling for someone who just wanted to be your friend.
you didn’t know why you felt so conflicted but this was your job and you were going to do your best at it no matter what. when you got home that night, you told yourself that you’d keep your relationship with heeseung professional. even if the friendship that was growing between you was one of the most genuine you’ve had in a while.
the next day, you and your manager were the first to show up from both of your teams. you both sat and talked while you waited, and she mentioned that you and heeseung were invited to host at an upcoming award show.
she told you that you didn’t have to make your decision right away. of course, you told her about what happened so she wanted to make sure you knew the choice was yours. but you both knew that declining the offer with no valid reason wouldn’t look right.
“it’s okay, you can tell them that i accept,” you said, looking down at your hands.
“then congratulations on your first gig as an award show host,” she said, leaning in to place a hand over yours. you looked up and she gave you a cheerful nod.
“well we don’t know if it’s certain yet,” you replied with a small chuckle, still nodding back as a thanks.
“no it is, heeseung accepted right away yesterday,” she said, raising her eyebrows at you, making you roll your eyes at her.
“thanks for keeping it professional,” you said, and you both shared a laugh before the conversation, thankfully, switched to another topic.
after some time had passed, you decided to grab something to eat from the breakfast table that was set for the mcs and artists. you filled up a small bowl with some fruits and a small croissant.
“y/n?” you heard from behind you. you knew that voice well, so you took a deep breath before responding.
“good morning, heeseung,” you replied, suddenly very interested in which fork you should choose.
“uh… would you like a drink? we picked some up at the cafe on the way here,” he offered, with only one cup in his hand. you looked down at it then back up at him.
“oh that’s nice of you but i don’t really like coffee,” you said, trying to move around him but he stepped in front of you again.
“i- i know you don’t. it’s tea actually, the way you ordered it last time,” he said abruptly, a slight blush appearing high on his cheeks.
you let out a small sigh as you took the cup in your empty hand and he gave you a small smile. he almost looked relieved as he took a small step back. he didn’t move more than that though and he looked like he wanted to say more. the silence was beginning to get a bit too awkward for you though.
“thank you. uh… i’ll go first then,” you said, returning the small smile. you brushed past him lightly but you could feel him watching you all the way out of the room. your face felt like it was on fire by the time you stepped into the dressing room.
how could you even think about getting over your feelings when he made you react like this? he only looked at you, you barely brushed past him, he remembered your drink order… but that didn’t mean anything. maybe his manager wrote it down or something.
you forced yourself to forget about it as your team did your hair and makeup. you usually sat by heeseung for this part but when he came in you were already finished and making your way to put your interview outfit on.
heeseung knew you were avoiding him. the next time he saw you you were already on the set reading over your lines, which you usually did in the dressing room together.
“hey, y/n, can we talk for a second?” he asked as he approached the small stage.
“i think we’ll be getting started any moment now so… maybe later,” you said, knowing you’d be leaving the second your segments were recorded.
a minute passed before the director walked in and started giving orders to everyone. then the lights and cameras were on, mics were being handed out, and you both were putting on the perfect show that everyone loved.
you smiled and laughed at heeseung the way you always did. for a second he forgot that you no longer wanted anything to do with him. he found himself paying attention to every single movement you made. the way you placed your hand on his arm, the way your cheeks rose when he made a joke, how your eyes sparkled under the bright lights as you watched him talk.
he wasn’t sure why your conversation the other day bothered him so much. he wanted to clear up the confusion more than anything but he didn’t know what that was in the first place. why were you suddenly so upset at him? the reason didn’t matter just the thought of you being hurt by him made him so mad at himself.
he was pulled out of his thoughts when a couple of the lights turned off and the director was making the call for a break. when he looked back down to where you were stood beside him you were already gone. he needed to talk to you. it’s all that he could think about since the other day.
you had ran off to the dressing room to touch up your own makeup. well, really you just wanted any excuse to be on your own and away from heeseung of course. but as if you summoned him yourself, there he was walking through the door.
“oh, there you are,” he said, his eyes lighting up when they came in contact with yours in the mirror. you didn’t say anything just finished applying some gloss to your lips. you quickly tried to make your way out of the room but he stood blocking the door.
“can we talk, please?” he asked. you took a step back when you looked up and his eyes were doing all the begging for him. then took another step back when he moved closer, eyes still not breaking away from yours.
“there’s nothing to talk about, heeseung,” you said, shaking your head and looking anywhere but his eyes. before you knew it he had walked you all the way back to the vanity. you let out a gasp as the makeup shook from how abruptly you hit the table.
“then why are you avoiding me?” he said, head leaned down to try and look you in the eyes. as if the answers he searched for would be found in them.
“i’m not! and we were great on the show like always so there’s no problem,” you replied, wanting nothing more than to be out of this room.
“i’m not stupid and you know that’s not what i meant,” he said, speaking quieter the closer he got to you. your bodies weren’t touching but the proximity still made you feel like you couldn’t breathe. “just tell me what i did wrong.”
“you didn’t do anything wrong! and there’s no more discussion! so let’s just go back out there and do exactly what we were doing before,“ you replied, finally gaining some confidence and looking up to meet his gaze. “everything is for the audience, for the show anyway.”
he looked you in your eyes, so intensely you wanted so badly to break the eye contact but you couldn’t let yourself back down now. the corner of his lip lifted so slightly you almost missed it and he looked down to see your hand gripping the edge of the table.
“everything just for the show,” he said, but you couldn’t tell if he was asking. he leaned just a bit closer as he placed his hands behind yours on the table, your noses practically touching now.
it took everything in you to not let your chest rise and fall so obviously hard and for you not to close the gap despite the tension that you knew he could feel too. why was he doing this? you couldn’t let him win. something switched in your mind now because all you wanted was for him to feel what you felt.
“just like you said,” you replied, placing a hand on his chest to hold him in place. you raised your head and your lips were so close it felt like they were magnets attracted to each other. but you didn’t move any closer, all you did was stare up into his eyes. you shifted your eyes down from his eyes to his lips once… twice… then you felt it.
you could feel his heart beating hard and fast in his chest, and that’s all you needed. all you wanted to know before you pushed him away. he let out a breath that he didn’t know he’d been holding in, as he took a step back of his own.
“our break is over soon. why don’t we save some of the theatrics for the cameras,” you said, as you walked away knowing you successfully gave him a taste of his own medicine. he wasn’t the only that could make someone fall for him.
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do you have any headcanons for the gang's reaction to each of them getting their first dates?
like high school darry and his gaggle of younger friends being all up in his business or omg the first time ponyboy has a date I just know that poor boy is gonna have a red face from all the teasing and talks he gets
I love this it’s so funny, enjoy
Darry
I hc that his first date was a girl on the cheerleading team. He didn’t rly like her very much but he was a sophomore in high school so he thought he did of course.
He was the first one to get a serious girlfriend. Soda Steve and Two-Bit, who had just gotten old enough to care about girls idolized him even more than they previously had. Soda would come into Darry’s room and sit on his bed and ask him all sorts of questions because he just wanted to know.
Darry for a few weeks kind of had that thing where he got a girlfriend and forgot he had friends, so Two-Bit was understandably salty about that but Darry got over it fast and after that Two-Bit just teased him a lot
Dally did not give two shits. He saw Darry getting a cheerleader girlfriend as more of him straying from the gang. If he was still showing up to school he was side eyeing them in the hallways 24/7
Johnny was too scared of girls to be really jealous, but he was also a little curious. But he pretended to be apathetic to it cause Ponyboy was a HATER. In his mind this random cheerleader was making Darry spend even less time at home than he normally did and he was pissed. Also he’s like 9 and probably still thinks girls have cooties 💀
Soda
His first real girlfriend was freshman year. I’m of the firm belief that he has TERRIBLE taste in women and this was the first time it really showed
Darry and Two-Bit both didn’t like Soda’s girlfriend and they’d talk a lot of shit about it. But Darry was letting Sofa handle himself and hoping be would EVENTUALLY stop letting his girlfriend treat him bad and then go find a nice girl. Neither of those rly happened-
Steve hated Soda’s girlfriend with a PASSION. It was the only time him and Ponyboy got along because their hatred was so visceral it brought them together. Steve was lowkey mostly just jealous but it helped that she was mean as hell
Dally and Johnny weren’t THAT involved. Both of them stopped showing up to school by then and it wasn’t a shock that Soda had a girlfriend nor that it was a…weird relationship. Dally was surprised that Soda didn’t rly end up having commitment issues tho
Ponyboy
I feel so bad for this man when he gets a girlfriend. I’ve seen a lot of people say that Darry would be insanely strict about him dating. I don’t think so, he has bigger battles. Especially post canon when he’s trying to give Ponyboy the same amount of freedom he and Soda enjoyed when they were his age. (Possibly even more because let’s be real Ponyboy is the good quiet kid of that family-)
However that doesn’t save him from teasing. Two-Bit is the worst ofc (and Dally if we count them as alive but for the sake of this we won’t). Steve also participates but he’s kind of just an asshole. He tried to purposely give Ponyboy bad advice but then Soda yelled at him so he stopped 🧍‍♀️
Speaking of Soda this man was giving all sorts of unsolicited advice. Ponyboy pretends to listen but in his head he’s like ���every single relationship you’ve been in with a girl has ended horrendously-‘. He listens to Soda's advice when it comes to flirting and getting girls to like him, but he just asks Darry for advice with the actual relationship stuff 
Johnny
Let’s pretend he’s alive for a minute. His first relationship is the only one that doesn’t crash and burn within 6 months. The gang is honestly flabbergasted that he’s pulling better than the rest of them 😭😭😭😭
Tbh they’re all rly wary at first. Especially Dally and Soda (Dally cause he’s Dally and Soda cause he’s still a lil sore from Sandy). The only one not rly freaked out is Ponyboy
Ponyboy either loves Johnny’s girlfriend or hates her. No in between. They’re either besties or he preys on her downfall. He third wheels them everywhere regardless tho. He’s like their practice kid.
Dally and Steve definitely threatened her 💀
Darry’s also wary but once again he has other things to worry about. He does keep track of their relationship tho so he’ll be ready to do damage control if they break up (he does that with everyone but he does it more with Johnny cause he knows from experience the longer the relationship lasts the worse the breakup is)
I don’t have many thoughts on the other three ngl. I think the gang is kinda just like ‘that happened’. Other than Soda being a massive hype man for Steve (until he gets jealous tee hee)
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bibiuksha · 4 months ago
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i saw newsies! it was my first time seeing this show actually and i rly enjoyed it.
they had a little children ensemble and they came out before the show started selling the newspaper prop IT WAS SO CUTE and this kid came running up to one of the newsies so he could buy the newspaper UEUEUEUUEE 😭
okay anyways onto the show THE LEAD ACTORS WERE AMAZING dillon klena and monika peña u just gained a fan 🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️ my dad mentioned he recognized peña tho from another musical (which i didnt go to) which is cool!! i hope to see them more in the future
the cast truly was talented they all did great i hope the best for them too
my fav part was pretty much all of act 2 LOLLLL during the first kiss i heard someone say out loud “…WELL!” and it made me laugh
also jack’s actor 😭😭😭 during the final number he jumped on like this side platform but he slipped but perfectly landed on the platform sitting down LMAOOOO him and this other cast member were cracking up on the side and the ending number was just 👌👌👌👌👌 i care them
i also loooove the costume design especially with katherine’s dresses I LOVE we need to bring back that style pls and w the HIGH HEEL BOOTS?? love
i forgor to take a photo of the set 💀💀💀 so i am stealing my brother’s photo
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cleromancy · 1 year ago
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while from the doylist perspective the stories are specifically propping tim up compared to jason by doing this... i am obviously still very interested in, and compelled by, jason canonically having a pretty high opinion of tim going all the way back to their first meeting.
(for the record, absolutely nothing in-universe justifies jason having this opinion of tim up until tim springs him from prison imo. he beat the snot out of tim in tt29 and it wasn't even hard and yet for some fucking reason he still walks away thinking tim is a Better Robin than he was? like... ok. sure. more thoughts on this later in the post tho)
so the new earth (post-crisis pre-reboot) continuity tim-jason interactions we have, in order, are batman 617-618 (from batman: hush, this ones a retcon and barely counts, its just jason holding tim hostage with a batarang to his throat; and you might also get a glimpse of jay doing this in batman annual 25 lol but its in the other room so im not checking), tt29 (published in the middle of uth coming out, lol), tt47 (countdown tie-in), robin 177 and 182-183 (post-countdown, immediately after jason dumps his red robin costume and one of tims rogues fishes it out of the dumpster to wear, correctly intuiting *for some reason* that this will get to tim), and......... sigh. stupid battle for the stupid cowl.
(and, since were talking about jasons perspective, theres also the picture wall in lost days. i dont know what issue it is because to me lost days is not "made up" of "issues", it is one book i simply open to devour whole whilst weeping.)
i think tt 29 is the interaction i find the most frustrating because... we have an idea what tt29 would have been like if it were good. bc we have ga01 69-72. and granted Tim is such a cocky little shit (affectionate) that jason simply. Would probably not have been able to scare him no matter what, lol... but imagine if this fucking issue had been good.
ok cutting 4 length
the problem with johns. .......the FIRST problem with johns. is that he regularly has interesting ideas and his execution of them completely falls flat. the second problem with johns is that he can't write dialogue. the third problem with johns is that it was really really important to him that you understood what a Talented And Special Boy tim is but instead of showing you that he just forced other characters to. tell you. over and over. jason is not johns' only victim in this quest. (and johns was also not the only perpetrator, as we will see when i get to fuckin fabnic.)
but like i said i *am* actually interested in the potential here, because i do think there is potential.
and i also think that--at least when you read into it as deeply as i do--jason is sympathetic in this issue. (don't give me "hes beating up a child" crap here btw. jason's only 2-3 years older, tims a peer to him, they could easily have gone to high school together if jason hadnt fuckin died.) johns deliberately shows us Jason hoping raven gets a reprieve from the nightmares, and he certainly was *trying* to show us how much it would fucking suck to be remembered as the Bad Robin, forgotten except to be a cautionary tale, what kind of things that would do to a person emotionally. AND he makes a point of highlighting Jason's loneliness and isolation as robin, and. tbh i dont think the issue itself rly blames Jason for that. (you most certainly do not gotta hand it to him though. under no circumstances do you gotta hand it to johns for anything.)
and while jason tearing off his clothes to reveal his party city knockoff robin costume--the better to beat you with, my dear--was, erm. falling mostly on the wrong side of the line btwn camp and cringe... i do think jason writing his own name in blood on the wall was right on the money, *especially* because it was obviously not tims blood. like, tim wasnt bleeding anywhere near enough for that. it was either fake blood or jason prepped his own beforehand for them to DNA test--but also if they saw it before they saw tim, to make them fear for tims life, as a reminder of the risks theyre dealing with here.
oh but i was planning on talking specifically about like. what Jason might actually have seen in tim that left him with a positive impression. as-written? kinda nothing. lmao. or well the one thing imo is this
just kidding i couldn't find the panelz somehow despite posting them literally like yesterday and i ran into this lol:
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>:| got distracted again. by this.
anyway i give up ill add the pics later. but its the exchange where jason has *decisively* won the fight, tims crumpled on the floor concussed and winded, and jason demands if tim *really* thinks he was good enough to tail bruce unnoticed for weeks.
and tim says "yes." hes beat up enough he can barely talk but there's still no hesitation whatsoever. and jason is *really* down on himself in this issue--he calls himself a failure, he feels like no one cared about his death, he feels unremembered. and jasons stated intentions here were to get the measure of tim but i also stand by the interpretation that he wanted to warn tim off of the sidekick gig, to remind him you uh. you have to be dick fucking grayson to survive it. (i dont believe either of them mentions him by name, but hey, dicks shadow is big enough for the both of them.)
i think what jason finds worthy of respect here--and, on top of that, intriguing enough that in robin 177 he entreats tim to join him--is the confidence, and also? at absolutely no point does tim believe jason is there to kill him. not a fuckin high bar, i know, but like i said i do think jason had *planned* to try and scare tim off (just also mega derailed himself by accident bc he got too in his feelings about the statue room 🥺), and... its not a bar he would have expected Tim to clear, is all im saying. particularly because while it is *possible* this took place in the middle of uth (tt 29 was released in november 05, between batman 646 and 647, which is the part where slade shows up bc black mask hired him to take jason out, so tt29 couldnt have happened in the middle of those two specific issues, but there are several other points at which jason could have taken a break in menacing gotham to fly to san Francisco), with Jason talking so negatively about himself i have to assume this is after the end of uth.
(you might be able to place this in the in-universe chronology by if/when teen titans mentions chemo dropping on bludhaven, which happens immediately before the bruce-jason-joker final showdown. however i dont feel like poking around for that or any other details to anchor tt29 to the other events happening at the time rn.)
i just also think so much of what jasons doing in this issue is like--he doesn't know *what* hes there to do. he had a plan and hes kinda fumbling it, not because tim is being especially resourceful but because jasons still licking his emotional wounds from uth, and titans tower is bringing up ones i dont think he ever realized hadnt healed. hes feeling everything at once. hes angry and hurt and full of self loathing but i think by the time tim simply says "yes," jason hits the stage of just being... burnt out. done lashing out, fucking tired, just wants to go home, if he can ever find it.
but i do think that "yes" would stick in his craw for a long time afterwards.
tt47: tim kicks jason in the nuts and pretty much declares them even for tt29 lolol. you may have seen my post about how jason only *sometimes* wears armor in countdown--hes drawn in the armored turtleneck and tac pants in tt47, but there are times in countdown hes out there fighting aliens and metas and shit in his jacket, a *t-shirt,* and *jeans.* just a squishy regular degular baseline human doing this and no one ever brings it up. but anyway. do i think tim would have seen jason wearing the equivalent of civvies plus a domino mask, narrow in on that, and immediately decide to kick him in the balls? i sure do. do i also think that this would make him rise in jasons estimation?
yeah. yeah, i really do. lol
anyway after this! after this is jasons briefish world-hopping stint as red robin saving the universe being a big damn hero and getting paid dust by everyone around him, in countdown; i think i mentioned before in this post that at the end he abandons the red robin suit in a dumpster, where it gets picked up by one of tims rogues. this storyline sucks and fabnic is a hack unfortunately. the rogue did it bc he wants tims attention or whatever. not important except for how irritating it is that fabnic fumbled a concept this juicy (tim inheriting and eventually purposely adopting The Bad Robin Mantle) which is also further fumbled by stupid battle for the stupid cowl, and the people who it falls to to salvage it are. johns again, in adventure comics 3, and yost, who is a better writer than johns or fabnic but not by like a huge margin.
and while i do think tim having a bad opinion of jason at this point was inevitable i find it so frustrating the way it was executed... like so often with Bad Tim Writing and also fuckin DC Editorial's Jason Slander Agenda shit it wasn't because in-universe thats how the characters would feel, the writer was using tim as a mouthpiece, and jasons competence and things he cares about arent taken seriously... BUT WHATEVER the point is that when Tim goes to stop Jason from his villainous scheme to reduce crime or whatevr jason has such a high opinion of him that he asks tim to join him:
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and jasons loneliness, his desperation to be heard, is such a theme for him in the new earth/post crisis era and i wish it had been. Handled better lol are you noticig a theme here its that Jason has been written badly. (tim too, tbh.) and when tim says no jasons dejected but unsurprised acceptance breaks my heart. but to me the most interesting part of jasons appearance at the end of tims robin series is in 182, when tim--for absolutely no good reason--gives jason the means to break out of prison.
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he says something about how its what Bruce would have wanted, but for. reasons i wont get too deeply into rn, that absolutely does not hold water.
anyway i just think there's no way jason doesn't start crushing on tim at least a little at this point. shrug.
bftc sucks and i dont want to look at it rn. but its also got examples of jasons high opinion of tim. and also im mad at it bc both countdown AND his appearances in robin feel like they could have been taking jason to a like. more of an antihero type of role and then we get bftc and morrison and its kind of. fucking hard to get jason anywhere near back on track after that for those of us who still like playibg in the post-crisis pre-reboot sandbox. and i wouldnt be mad about that if bftc had been good bc Jason absolutely does make an incredibly interesting and effective and tragic antagonist when handled well but well. he wasnt. and i have no idea what bftc would.have even been like if it was good bc it was so off the wall and dumb and assassinated actually *everyones* characters. so.
anyway
im just going to roll back to robin 183 now
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jasons referring to the damage tim got when he got a little bit exploded in 180, this pretty nasty burn on the back of his head, which was actually why he wore jasons RR cowl for the first time (he was still robin). but what you do see here--aside from Tims narration which puts him *firmly* on the side of obnoxiously arrogant and judgmental instead of charmingly cocky in this issue, to my estimation, thanks for nothing fabnic--is the two of them on firmly cordial terms. jason still thinks more highly than tim does of him, but theyre asking each other about their injuries... tim caring about the wellbeing of people he doesn't even like is par for the course with him, ofc, but once again Jason doesn't really get that a whole lot. constantly haunted by this panel from countdown btw:
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does he though!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
here is another jaytim preboot canon interactions post from a few months ago with some more thoughts, some repeated lol.
anyway. incoherent rambling complete for now. however. jaytim time is all the time 👍 i will revisit this.
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phagodyke · 5 months ago
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I SEE PEOPLE ON THE FLOOR SLIDE INTO THE SEA CANT STAY HERE ANYMORE WE'RE TURNING INTO FIENDS IF I STAY HERE TROUBLE WILL FIND ME IF I STAY HERE ILL NEVER LEAVE..... ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️
#i hope they play sea of love on tour its growing on me. this whole album has rly grown on me this year i used to be on the fence abt it#blaring the national loudly so i can think abt someone elses fears instead of my own... save me matt berninger#just had a little ripple in the ol mental illness and suddenly got rly scared for no reason abt triggering myself#its bc i was talking earlier abt how i find it easier to socialise w strangers than friends when im struggling mentally#bc i feel like i have so much to lose if i fuck up w ppl i care abt. and also when i care abt ppl it gives them the ability to hurt me#bc i cant get rsd triggered around strangers. their rejection has no bite bc idc what they think or if they like me etc#but when i care abt ppl a lot. being rejected by or percieving rejection from them is like. worldshatteringly bad#specifically feeling unwanted/unloved the approval/criticism stuff doesnt affect me as strongly#and it can be so unpredictable like ik its not rational. so being around them becomes incredibly high stakes for me which makes me so sad#bc like. if im having a bad time all i want is to not be alone and to feel supported and cared abt but i deny myself that always#ah and im just scared bc its rly hard to come back after a few weeks like that. like yeah im feeling much much better and more stable#but im still a little fragile so my guard is still up. itll take a while before i stop reflexively thinking ppl are lying to me#its a fake it til u make it thing tho ik i need to spend time w them again even if some distant part of me is trying to remind me they#dont care and im everyones least favourite and will forever be on the outside like okay who gives a fuck. i care abt them and want to#be around them and that should be enough for me but auruururuugh. one million prickly needles in my brain#its all good its part of the recovery process ive done this before 10000 times itll be fine. and they do care#and i just need to keep reminding myself that until i trust its real again. oh the national we really in jt now#its okayyyy its not that deep im just very tired. wobble over im going to BED#gn everyone <3#.diaries
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royallygray · 7 months ago
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Scar HC S10E12
actually welcome to Scar Says Sus Stuff
this was supposed to be me talking about my favorite parts or parts I want to share but it's just the sus parts and several things that I specifically liked
like. a rly in depth AO3 comment except with a YouTube video.
spoilers for his video
(I haven't watched most of scar's episodes so far)
-- --
1:01 "grant me access to the hole" scar. scar please. your wording. fix it. but also never change we love you but oh my god SCAR
it is actually triggering me that he's just casually on three hearts. my man PLEASE EAT
3:53 "I'm gonna wait for [Grian] inside of his mouth"
5:38 "well now Skizz and my bits are all mixed together"
6:06 "I fall for it EVERY time, by the way" -Skizz. I love Scar and Skizz, the two gullible-est people bonding over how they're gullible. It's genuinely somehow wholesome.
6:20 "something of substance was gonna come from this"
6:44 SKIZZ COME ON MAN I HAD FAITH IN YOU WHAT THE HECK
6:51 There was PASSION in this. Scar go off on them YEAH
7:33 how did I know he was gonna be one block off. rip scar you tried o7
7:40 "he didn't get inside my hole at all" SCAR.
8:17 "we could get six horns" the word horns sounds like hoards. and also kind of the other word.
8:39 (for one frame) the inside of scars face is cursed
10:17 THAT WAS SMOOTH THAT WAS SO SMOOTH IM OBSESSED??? SCAR YOURE A MAGICIAN. A WIZARD. THAT SNAP. IM OBSESSED.
but also. scar. why do you have a tnt minecart as decoration. scar I don't have high hopes for this room. scar you come from the Life series. scar. it's gonna die. someone's gonna shoot it with a flame bow I guarantee it
10:46 LMAO the way he tried to say cartographer sounds so. like. idk endearing or smth idk. Like he tried to breathe in and talk at the same time.
11:05 "I've just realized I kind of look like a composter" that is the entire clip by the way. all you out of context makers, I need that in there. idk if it'll be as funny as it is in here, because seriously, the delivery of having literally no other context other than it just being a random thought that popped into Scar's head is so funny to me
11:41 scar at the goat horn shop what will he do. I'm not mad scar. I think you're an adult who is making decisions with their fictional money. and you deserve it. you deserve that goat horn.
11:52 I lied put it back
12:44 WAIT YOURE GONNA PUT TURTLES AND DOLPHINS IN HERE THATS SICK I LOVE IT
in seventh grade we did an essay on whether zoos are good or bad and while I do love scars character in this I literally cannot stop thinking about it :(
13:15 SCAR THAT WAS TOO SMOOTH I--OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD THATS SUCH A COOL TRANSITION AND ALSO THE SOUND EFFECT OH MY GODSSSSS
ALSO YOU SWIRLED TO SUCH A COOL NEW THING WHAT THE HECK WOW LIKE OKAY
wait oh my god it's a sink?? the water and lava?? oh my god??
14:55 damn Gem and Grian's spike has grown
15:35 scar I don't think you remember where your stuff is in the first place. at least like this it'll look cool. although the underground weird chest monster has character and I actually kinda like it in the same way that I like when my floor is a mess because it just feels inhabited and has personality
15:58 oh my god scar you transition god
16:33 scar why are you there
16:35 Etho I appreciate you LMAO
17:19 Etho have you seen Skizz's storage. it's. bad. like. it is worse than Scar's. Genuinely. It gives me pain.
17:25 THE PEARL DOORS. THE BOATEM PEARL DOORRSSSS also scar going through the middle even tho Etho literally opened the other door for him LMAO
17:32 ah yes dig when there is an entrance yes yes
17:43 honey roofs. I see you're obsessed with Joel's gift mr. slab.
this scene is actually amazing. I've never seen Etho and scar interact 1 on 1 (I don't watch a lot of Scar, and I have watched Etho a total of approximately once. his videos are rly long) and also just. Etho's system is so cool.
also Etho's storage system is adorable :D
I like both storage systems. Etho's is significantly more functional (and less likely to explode, scar that minecart is making me wary) but I really enjoy the aesthetic of Scar's.
thank you for coming to Royal says stuff, go watch scar's video, it's great.
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