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80's Fest Child Actor of the day: River Phoenix #riverphoenix #RipRiverPhoenix #mosquitocoast #standbyme #anightinthelifeofjimmyreardon #indianajonesandthelastcrusade #explorers #littlenikita #runningonempty #80s #80sfest #durandurantulsas6thannual80sfest
#river phoenix#rip river phoenix#running on empty#mosquito coast#explorers#stand by me#little nikita#indiana jones and the last crusade#a night in the life of jimmy reardon#80s#80s fest#duran duran tulsa's 6th annual 80s fest
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To keep myself happy and occupied, I've been enjoying Prequel's new album cover filter.
Still can't believe River would have been 54 today. :(
#cillian murphy#river phoenix#edits#prequel#my edits#silliness#rip river phoenix#tommy shelby#polaroid#prequel app#2024
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This movie will forever be my comfort movie. I care about this movie so much. It makes me so happy and kinda makes me wanna cry for no reason. I have a huge poster of this movie in my room.
Stand by me
STAND BY ME (1986) dir. Rob Reiner
#stand by me#80s#chris chambers#gordie lachance#teddy duchamp#vern tessio#rip river Phoenix#Can't believe Gordy was fucking will Wheaton#this movie changed me
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This evening I bought 10 $2.00 DVDs that all feature Keanu Reeves. I will find more at a later date. My Own Private Idaho is of highest importance to obtain.
#keanu reeves#dangerous liaisons#parenthood#bram stocker's dracula#much ado about nothing#johnny mnemonic#the devil’s advocate#the matrix#the gift#the matrix reloaded#the matrix revolutions#rip river phoenix
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happy birthday river 💫
#aesthetic#art#alternative#photography#river phoenix#celebs#celebrities#celebrity#rip#poetry#black and white#actors#actor#birthday#happy birthday#cinephile#cinema#cinemetography#film#films#boys#icon#movie#movies#90s#90s aesthetic#photografy#photoshoot#hbd#king
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Gone, but never forgotten. Rest in peace River. 🤍✨
August 23rd 1970-October 31st 1993
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Huh...first gif, he actually sorta does look a bit like River Phoenix
Titanic (1997) dir James Cameron
+ IMDB Trivia
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scott left. he left without saying anything. he left mike in italy. he didn't say anything.
#im RIPPING MY HAIR OUT#fuck#FUCK FUCK#notsofriendlyfriendlyreminder#film#movie#my own private idaho#my own private idaho movie#keanu reeves#scott favor#mike waters#river phoenix
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August River
River Jude Phoenix 1970-1993
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i love river phoenix and my own private idaho way too much...
#river phoenix#keanu reeves#fanart#mike waters#scott favor#my own private idaho#90s movies#90s#90s boys#rip#digital art#digital drawing#digital painting#artists on tumblr#art#artist#my art#illustration#arte digital#art improvement#improvement#procreate#i miss him#underrated art#underrated#idk
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It might sound crazy, but every time I think of River I think of that quote from The Fault in Our Stars. Because it perfectly describes how I feel about him. I didn't actually know who River was really for the longest time. I loved Joaquin but I knew nothing about his brother. Which is so unusual for me, because usually when I love someone like that I want to know everything about them. I don't think I was ready to have this many emotions about someone I'd never met. But I remember when I found River through MOPI I fell in love with him like you fall asleep, slowly and then all at once. I don't know how else to describe it other than drowning. I was so happily drowning in him and his life and his words. God do I love him. More than I think I've ever loved anyone, I love him so much its hard to breathe sometimes, it kind of hurts. But I'd take a day like today over and over again if it means I can have River in my life. I miss him so desperately but especially on a day like today. I'll keep writing these posts because he keeps on giving to me. Blessing me with knowledge and strength and a faith I could only ever have in him. My life would be so barren, so empty without the knowledge of him, that I'll take this pain. Every year for the rest of my days. Because he's so worth it. The beauty he's brought to my life is so so worth it. It's been 30 years and I still love him. I still need him. I still adore him. He's everything I have and all I need. Rest in peace my sweet, complicated, captivating summer boy. I'll never forget you.
#scribblesbyc#rip river#river phoenix#its been years and I'm still searching for the words to describe how much I love and miss this man#like even when I have nothing I know I have him
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Up next on my 80's Fest Movie 🎬 🎞 🎥 marathon...Stand By Me (1986) on classic DVD 📀! #Movie #movies #drama #standbyme #stephenking #WilWheaton #riverphoenix #RipRiverPhoenix #coreyfeldman #jerryoconnell #richarddreyfuss #kiefersutherland #caseysiemaszko #bradleygregg #FrancesLeeMcCain #scottbeach #ripscottbeach #MarshallBell #BrunoKirby #dvd #80s #80sfest #durandurantulsas6thannual80sfest
#movie#movies#drama#stand by me#stephen king#wil wheaton#river phoenix#rip river phoenix#corey feldman#jerry o'connell#Richard Dreyfuss#Kiefer Sutherland#Casey Siemaszko#Bradley Gregg#frances lee mccain#Marshall Bell#scott beach#rip scott beach#bruno kirby#dvd#80s#80s fest#duran duran tulsa's 6th annual 80s fest#Spotify
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Animal welfare concerns and cliched fat sidekicks notwithstanding, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade has perhaps one of the best openings I've seen in any movie. I also appreciate that they're searching for Spanish colonial artifacts this time, instead of looting Indigenous stuff like in the first movie.
#obligatory rip to#river phoenix#indiana jones#indiana jones and the last crusade#last crusade#steven spielberg#george lucas
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🥺😭
“run to the rescue with love, and peace will follow”
— River Phoenix; August 23, 1970–October 31, 1993
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Oceans Rebirth
Summary; Bèiké’s control is slipping, her mind is breaking, storms ravage the land, droughts rage and fishermen yield nothing. When the Buddha is consulted, he offers a solution to her and her alone, but it’s not answer Bèiké really wanted to hear. Can she do what needs to be done before Sun Wukong interferes?
Warning; Angst, broken minds, arguments, hurt/kinda-comfort, self sacrifice, this was before Bèiké knew she was one of the true immortals. Art depicting mild gore. Please read with caution.
Taglist; @vap0rwave-dr34ml4nd @tunadunanana @szynkaaa @marcu-bug @s0rr3l @bottyshaker-900o (if you want to be added let me know.)
It’s finally done!!! 😭😭Strap in folks, this is going to be a long one.
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Being stretched so thin makes it difficult to be where I am in the moment… It’s hard to be everywhere at once, all the time…
Those are words that Bèiké has said more times she than could count. Words filled with exhaustion and a reality she had no choice but to accept.
Her mortal mind ever the servant to the very thing she immortally personified.
Part of her often wondered if the universe had made a mistake. Should she exist as she is? What if the water was just supposed to just stay water?
Why have a body? A consciousness?
Why possess a human heart?
The human body is such a fragile form to hold when you are Water.
As she lounged in a plush pillow-nest that filled a luxurious room within the palace of the Water Curtain Cave, her thoughts cause another morose sigh to escape from her. Which - in turn - caused a disgruntled chirp to rip her from her thoughts as she turned to face her ever wandering attention back onto her Simian Stone Brother.
Who, in turn, stared at her with sulking expression.
“Your mind wandered again.” Sun Wukong stated matter-a-factly. His tone as grumpy as his expression. The Great Sage not liking being anything less than the center of attention.
Instinctively, Bèiké’s mind filtered through a hundred possible excuses before she settled her mind and sighed. “I’m sorry brother… it’s hard to be here today.” She answered honestly.
Sun Wukong blinked. His expression loosing its annoyed grouch as he moved to sit a bit closer, getting in her space until their knees touched, his hands went to grip hers. She tensed at his proximity but didn’t move away, allowing him to initiate contact.
For all his foolishness and impulsive nature, he what he wasn’t was dull-witted.
“Hard-to-be-here as in, within this cave? Or hard-to-be-here as in, being in a body?” He gave her hands a gentle squeeze. Having known about her mind’s struggle to exist within her human form for a while now. Having found her dangerously dazed on more than one occasion when she had come to visit him and the Phoenix Maiden on the mountain of Flowers and Fruit he proudly called home.
Her mind had been so scattered that she neglected the body she - for reasons unknown to everyone accept the Buddha - possessed. She’d forget to eat, forget to move, forget to breathe, and in extreme circumstances, she’d forget to make her heart beat.
Her eyes would be open but staring at sights that weren’t in front of her. Sun Wukong had been forced to jerk her consciousness back into her body on multiple occasions, even biting her harshly to shock her out of her dazed state. Kick-starting her heart back up.
He had - back then - harshly scolded her for allowing herself to get to that state until he had learned just what had caused it. What she was constantly fighting. What she was eternally trying to hold together with no breaks or reprieves or mercy. He pitied his sister as much as he found himself begrudgingly admiring her.
Now, she stared at his hands as she tried to focus on the Monkey King in front of her, not the rush of the water curtain cave as it beat the rock into submission, not focus on the fish swimming through the veins of the river or the clouds overhead moving as though on a breath.
She tried to focus on the soft fur, not the whales casting their bubble nets to catch fish on the other side of the world, their songs vibrating her ears. Or the blood running through the creatures of the worlds veins as they ran, or slept, or played, or fought, or-
A louder chirp made her flinch back to reality as she met the glowing ember eyes her brother ever possessed, staring at her with more than a little worry.
“Is it getting harder sister? Tell this Sun Wukong and I will do what I can to assist.” His stone calloused hands rubbing over her arms in an attempt to ground her, his nails gently scraping and pinching against her skin. Trying to comfort her in the way his people do.
She sighed and closed her eyes, allowing herself to be grounded as she leaned forward slightly to rest her forehead against his. His heat a steady anchor against her normally cool skin.
He cooed at his little sister. The sound reverberating from the back of his throat. For all his playful nature and mischievous tendencies, Sun Wukong, the great sage equal to heaven, was a good king who cared for his people. And he had claimed her as one of his. His nature wouldn’t allow him to be anything less than attentive to the woman he had taken as his younger sister.
So he took it in stride when his normally reserved and touch-adverse sister gripped the fur on his upper arms.
She gently rubbed her nose against his. “Forgive this Bèiké, Wukong. You should be anticipating the celebrations for the Day of your birth, you only have 4 full moons left… not worrying about a woman slowly going mad.” She released the hold she had on his fur with a sigh. “I can hear the voices of the water calling me, I don’t think I am strong enough to fight them anymore… do you blame me?”
Wukong nuzzled his forehead against hers with a soft coo. “Of course not dear sister. You’re forced to stretch yourself thin, I can’t blame you for something you have no control over. Go and rest. Regain your strength so that you can better worship this Sun Wukong later.” He grinned and gave her ear a chaste nip, hooting out a laugh when she flinched back and glared at him. “As you say, there are four months until the day of my birth is here. I expect great presents from you for my birth celebrations. An offering as great and handsome as I.”
She blew out a breath in his face to get him to back further away from her, which he did with his own flinch that left her chuckling. “Worry not brother, I plan on gifting you a treasure that will surely enhance your glory. Mayhaps it will also grant you some humility.”
“How dare you, insolence! I am a Pious Buddhist.” Wukong guaffs, crossing his arms, scowling but happy she’s feeling better enough to play with him.
“Yes and the Lady QuanYin throws celebrations every night for the inebriated.” She rolls her eyes as she gets to her feet. Finally giving into the urging of her voices in her mind commanding her to return to the sea.
“Your faith in this Sun Wukong is lacking sweet sister.” He pouts, snapping his teeth at her.
“I simply see the truth of you dear brother.” She smiles back at him as she steps to the Water Curtain, visibly relaxing as the spray drizzles across her skin.
She turned to give him one last hug before she allowed her physical form to quite literally melt away, rejoining the water curtain, then the river, then the ocean. Where she expanded to a vast nothing that was everything.
It was much easier to think when she didn’t have a physical form. Flesh, bones, organs and a functioning brain are complex and hard to maintain. It was much easier to exist when she didn’t need to worry about feeding her immortally mortal body, or keep track of her limbs, organs and senses.
The waters, or more specifically, allowing herself to rejoin the waters gave her clarity.
And she took advantage of that clarity.
The celebrations of Sun Wukong’s birthday for one. She already had an idea of what she wanted to gift him.
The storm summoning whistle and the abyssal armor.
Both grand and glorious and would be useful to him in his battles should he need to regear up to defend his kingdom.
Useful gifts, gifts that will give her brother a fun gleam in his eye. Gifts she knew Sun Wukong would love.
As whales sung in the distance, sharks made their migrations, carp fought their way upriver, children played in the streams, rain rehydrated the land and all the other things the waters of the world did, Bèiké thought about her families and friends, and wondered what they would do next.
And she tried not to think about how it was getting harder and harder hold her body in its physical state. Her chest painfully tight, her lungs stuttering.
She didn’t want to think about a fact so scary it had left her weeping in her hidden rooms on more than one occasion.
She may be immortal… but her body was failing.
And nothing could stop it or slow it’s failing down.
She didn’t know when it started, if she had to put her finger on a specific timeframe. Perhaps it was always that way and she only became aware of it the past hundred years or so. Or maybe it was just a switch that day she grew aware of her mind becoming more and more disoriented.
And as vast as the knowledge in the ocean was, there was little that could be done to stop a human body from being crushed by it.
But she didn’t want to think about that.
So she forced her wandering thoughts back to what she could get for her friends and family when she returned to her palace.
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Bèiké remembered the first thing she ever heard. She didn’t know when exactly her consciousness had begun, only that she had one day become aware of the fact she had one.
“There you are, what a beautiful child you’ll become. Welcome to the world, Maiden of the Worldly Waters.”
The voice had been masculine in nature. But gentle and happy. The voice one should associate with a person meant to be a mentor or a guide.
She had known with a certainty she didn’t know she possessed that it was the Voice of the Buddha. And she had decided she liked his voice before she even knew what it was to ‘like’ or ‘dislike’ something.
The ocean is old, timeless and ever shifting, No one truly knows exactly how old the Waters of the world are.
By the time that thought occurred to Bèiké, she was already a part of it. And to have a consciousness be born of the waters is an unexplainable experience.
Bèiké remembered the first time she opened her eyes.
She was in the deep ocean, the light far away but still visible. She felt so small yet far too large at the same time. She felt powerful yet small, loved and feared, wild and free.
Her first act had been to head to the surface, the light had been so beautiful from under the waves and she had wanted to see it up close.
The first time she stepped out of the water and onto land it was a wild storm. She laughed with the thunder and danced in the rain. Making it dance around her in turn with nothing but the mist to cover her modesty
The world felt so alive.
She can’t recall now how long she had danced. Only that when the storm had finally calmed, she was back in the middle of the ocean, the waves creating flowing skirts around her hips and her hair covering her chest to flow into the waters as pearls formed to begin adorning her.
She was sitting on top of the waters, leaning back to watch the clouds when they arrived.
She remembered thinking how pretty and bright their armor was, how delicate their movements. The bright objects they held gleaming in the light and appearing to glow - she’d later learn that they were called swords and spears, weapons. - And they guided down a Man and a Woman to stand before her.
Bèiké remembered thinking that the man’s clothes and hair were radiant. And that his brow was stern.
The woman, similarly, was a stunning beauty. Something about her felt familiar to Bèiké, and even without the older woman saying a word, the maiden knew in her heart that she was fond of her.
The conversation had been brief. Having been so long, Bèiké struggled to remember exactly what was said,l that day, but they held curiosity and caution towards her. Bèiké, in her innocence of being newly formed and freshly capable of speech, and done little help relieve any suspicion.
When she simply told them she was water, that they stood on her body, that they held her within them, it was the older woman, who introduced herself as the Lady Mazu, who confirmed their suspicion.
The Lady Mazu was delighted, and took the maiden as her own right away, giving her the name she most popularly went by. “Bèiké” little seashell, her precious ocean gift. Encouraging the Jade Emperor, to agree.
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The time in the jade palace had been a time of great learning, how to read and write, proper speech and posture, songs, poetry and dance, palace life and hierarchy, avoiding the empress and her secretive glares and false niceties.
Bèiké was kept busy
So busy, that it took a long time for the whispers to be heard.
She remembered when it happened the first time.
A dinner banquet for one of her brother’s promotions had been coming to a close. Beike had remembered being on edge all day but not knowing why. Her precious attendants, Tian Shui and HeHua were similarly concerned.
It had snuck up on her, like a snake hidden by shadows, coiled and ready to strike. Bèiké had no idea the danger was so close. Perhaps that was why it had snuck up on her with such success.
It wasn’t a trickle of sound that steadily grew louder, no. It had been a cascade. The dam bursting and the floodgates flying open.
Beike had collapsed holding her hands over ears, trying to block out a torrent of sound that was coming from her mind.
Rushing through her like a wild river and a riptide combined. The crash of noise that left a single repeating message in the front of her mind.
“I must return.”
She didn’t remember her body fading or her return to the water. Only that when the sound finally, finally stopped, and she was able to open her eyes once more, she was deep in the ocean. The only sound she could hear was the beating of her own heart.
Relief.
The rest was a blur, vaguely aware of dragons, great, shining, metallic beasts coming and checking on her on behalf of her royal family. But even the exchanged worse were fuzzy at best. Eventually she was able to “Wake Up” again and come out of the waters and she was later told she was gone for three weeks.
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She had learned since the day of her brothers promotion banquet, when the crescendo washed over her and forced her back to the ocean for over a fortnight. She had learned the signs to look for and the whispers to pick up on.
It didn’t completely disappear the problem, however it made it more predictable. She knew when she had to return to water, to listen to the voices before it was too late and the whispers went from a whisper to a scream, a small request to be heard to a deafening demand to be obeyed.
Instead of a tidal wave of noise that appeared all at once, it had in time become a creeping whisper that steadily grew louder at a much more tolerable rate.
Still…
It was easy to get lost in the whispers of her own nature. The waters from around the world, the clouds above growing fat with rain, the ebb and flow of the waters over the land, the last dried breath of the parched to the gasping struggles of the drowning. The rivers widening and bending, the lakes and ponds rising and falling.
Life ever moving, water ever flowing. And her mortal, human mind struggled to keep up.
It was getting worse…. How frustrating.
“My Beike!”
She jumped back to her body and blinked at her adopted mother, the Lady Mazu’s eyes fixed on her with worry, her hand clutching hers in a grip as tight as her delicate hold would allow.
Bèiké gripped her skirts as she forced her attention back to her present body.
“Mother, I am here.”
The goddess of the Sea and guardian of sailors looked at her daughter with eyes filled with doubt and worry. “…Are you?”
Bèiké sighed, unable to lie to her. “For the moment… I’m sorry mother.”
The Lady Mazu furrowed her brow and gave her daughter a chastising look. “Naughty girl, why must you make your poor mother worry so?” She sighed, gently ran her fingers through her daughter’s hair, untangling the pearls that inlay the long sea-colored strands before gently cupping the young woman’s cheek. “I am worried for you dear, I fear that I see less and less of you. And then when I do see you, I can’t entertain the joy in my heart because your eyes are still far away.”
Despite knowing it wasn’t truly her fault, Bèiké still felt guilt tighten her chest at her mother’s distress. “I have failed you mother, I haven’t been filial. I beseech you to forgive your foolish child.” Bèiké pressed her cheek into her mother’s touch, her hands soft and warm, soothing, grounding.
“Oh you silly girl. How can I blame you? I should be the one apologizing.”
Bèiké sucked in a harsh breath and flinched back. “What? No! Mother you mustn’t, I should’ve never put you in this position of worry.”
Lady Mazu simply sighed and and summoned her regalia, sitting up straight, fixing her skirts and holding her head high. “I am the mother of the sea, I can sooth storms and protect sailors, I am a guide, a saint and savior…” her face filled with sadness again. “Yet I can’t sooth your mind, I can’t guide you home… I can’t protect your heart. You must forgive your helpless mother.”
Bèiké shook her head, unwilling to let her mother take the blame for her. “My lady please, there’s nothing to forgive, I have never blamed you. Mother. I owe the person I am today thanks to you.”
“Oh my sweet child. I only wish I could fix your mind.”
The conversation had then turned to more light-hearted topics after that. Mother and daughter catching up and Bèiké happily gifting her mother with precious treasures from the deep, enriching her palace evermore. Doing her filial duty to the woman who adopted her as family.
They both tried to avoid the forbidden topic of the Pearl Maiden’s mind.
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It started a month ago with a single storm.
Bèiké had been swift to quell it. But it had devastated all the same.
Not in damage or loss of life. No.
In fact, since it had been in the middle of the ocean, nothing had been harmed. It was devastating in a far more subtle way.
Bèiké had had no control over it.
It had been created without her conscious control, and despite being water, it resisted her command.
That shouldn’t have been possible.
She Was water.
Quelling a storm was a simple to her as raising a hand above her head. And yet…
She felt fear take root in her stomach, her hands shaking as she kept them clenched to her chest.
She was losing control…
What did that mean for her? What did that mean for water? Her mind scrambled to find an answer but there was none to be had.
She had been far too frazzled to return to the Jade palace, she couldn’t risk the courtiers, the eunuchs, or even her precious attendants observing her in such a state.
But in desperate need for some sort of connection, something to stop the torrent of panic flooding through her, she went in search of it among people who wouldn’t judge her for being anything other than the gentle princess.
And so it was, that she had found herself on the mountains of flowers and fruit. And Sun Wukong, though surprised, had welcomed her into his home all the same.
“Pray tell brother - and you mustn’t judge me for this query- but say you feel like you’re loosing control over your body. How would you handle such a dilemma?” It was a question Bèiké had casually asked the victorious fighting Buddha hours after they had sat for dinner. Wukong’s limbs had been loosened with his favorite wine, he had been coming down from his more festive mood that had started the evening with his people.
Still, he gave the question some serious thought all the same… or as serious as the wine allowed him to be.
He answered her as he fell back, draping himself across her lap and putting her hand into his golden mane, demanding some head scratches. She obliged him as he answered her, his eyes shut and the smile on his face content.
“I would try to think about what could possibly be causing this body of mine to be so bold as to disobey its master.” He grinned all teeth. “If I came up with nothing, had no pompous trickster cursed me, had no imperious scalawag tried to poison me somehow, I would simply assume it was an internal issue and I’d open myself up to take an intimate look.”
She blanched as she looked at him. “I don’t presume you’re being metaphorical in your words.”
Wukong hooted out a laugh at her expression. “I take it Brother Wujing and my dear Phoenix didn’t tell you the story of the three insufferable Tao priests who presumed to be immortal?”
Bèiké slowly shook her head as she resumed his head scratches as his whined persistence. “No, I don’t believe anything involving Taoist priests came up.”
Wukong shrugged. “Well, it’s no matter, this Sun Wukong can happily give you a demonstration.” He jumped out of her lap and hopped to his feet. “Little monkeys! Go get this Old Sun a sharp blade! Watch as your great king demonstrates his greatness!”
Bèiké insisted he didn’t need to prove his immortalities to her of all people, she was there for the aftermath of Lao Tsu’s furnace incident afterall.
However Wukong was already too deep in his feverish mania to be stopped, he wanted to brag and show off, and so he would. Bèiké doing her best to not be obvious in her looking away.
She had politely excused herself shortly after getting him drunk off of his favorite wine again so that her departure wouldn’t be noticed.
Well that had been…
Graphic…
Fruitless in answers as well… she doubted ripping herself apart to look at her own insides would enlighten her to the answered she desired.
She couldn’t even hold a physical form for long, let alone focus long enough to disembowel herself. Wukong was mad she decided, utterly mad. Not that that was really surprising news to her.
Still…
As her heart thumped audibly in her chest, she laid a hand against it as she found herself thinking.
As the waters churned around her, and she felt her control slipping bit by bit as the sun began to brighten the sky once more, she contemplated…
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Bèiké huddled in a corner of her room, her head in her hands as her body shook.
“You’re okay, you’re okay, keep it together, you have to breathe.” She repeated that mantra to herself over and over.
The whispers were a near constant yell in her mind now. And much to her horror, control had fully slipped weeks ago.
And even worse, she couldn’t return to the water.
She was stuck in her human body, and as her mind and nature struggled to return to its source - return to water - it beat and slammed against the fragile, mortal shell like a vicious trapped beast. Shredding and biting and screaming.
It hurt so bad.
Her need to return was a constant pounding in her head. Her mind ripping itself apart.
Water acted now without her permission, her own body betraying her. Storms either ravaged the land or refused to hydrate the land entirely.
Massive floods and severe droughts were reported around the world. The loss of life had already overwhelmed the kingdom of shadows, the underworld was choking on the dead.
Fishermen, too, yielded nothing. No fish, no urchins, no crabs or shrimp, no octopus, not even seaweed were successfully caught.
And combined with the severe droughts and floods, the mortals were starving and thirsty.
And as mortals do when desperate; They prayed.
Prayed for relief, prayed for mercy, begged for something to save their families and themselves.
The gods, celestials and denizens of the sea did what they could. But fighting a never ending storm was no simple task.
The Lady Mazu had run herself to the ground in exhaustion trying to sooth the storms and save the people with little to no results. The waters disobeying her as much as they had sliced themselves loose of Bèiké.
Her heart thumped painfully in her chest, causing her to sob as she sucked in a breath that she distantly realized she had not taken for 7 minutes. Black spots littering her vision as her mind was pulled in a thousand different directions.
Someone spoke to her, the sound of the voice echoing in her head like so much agony, she flinched away from the sound and clenched her hands over her ears tighter.
“Breathe, you have to breathe, keep breathing.” She mumbled reminders to herself as she manually counted her breaths.
Thunder crashed far too close, the rain beating on the windows- against the walls, the clouds holding the city churning, the panicked blood flow of the guards and citizens,
Flood washing poor creatures away, areas of dead space that refused to be quenched, lighting striking the ocean in an electrified jolt, wind blowing far too quickly, the sun being blocked out. The world darkening.
Pain… so much pain.
She sobbed, feeling it all, begging it to end.
That voice again, more insistent, but just as painful. She shook her head and whimpered, it was too loud to hear.
She was only vaguely aware of the shadowed figure walking away from her quickly on hurried footsteps.
Her mind was beset by the suffering of those below, weak heartbeats, panicked breaths, last breaths, waters’ destruction. She couldn’t focus.
It hurt.
Help… She doesn’t know if it was said out loud or not. Someone please help me
“Some-ing…Done… this-ing t-.. kill her.” She couldn’t tell how close those words she heard were. She didn’t know who said them or what they were talking about. She couldn’t even focus before her mind was pulling her to look at the great western oceans, another storm violently being born.
“Stop… please…” she didn’t know who she was begging. “You’re hurting them.”
A twisting turret of water shot into the sky to connect to violently twisting clouds above, dragging life into it and breaking their bodies. Bèiké felt their violent, panicked end as she retched and gagged.
“Stop, you’re hurting them, stop.” Tears forming in her eyes, running down her face, staining her clothes… or was that blood? What was water?
Help me please, it hurts… she begged again.
“Shhh child, breathe.” Hands, somehow both warm and cold, comforting in their touch, caressed her face and settled over her ears, gently lifting her head towards the source of the voice. “Breathe now.”
She sucked in a breath as more tears fell from her eyes, her hands gripping the ones steadying her head.
Her eyes opened to reveal the Buddha, that smile ever present on his face. She was dimly aware of her mother, father and attendants standing behind him a ways.
She looked back up towards the Buddha, her breathing slowing enough to allowed some capability of speech.
“Somethings wrong with me. I can’t control it.” She choked out, her eyes blurred with her tears as she begged him to help her. “I’m being ripped apart.”
“Yes maiden of the waters, I know. I must apologize. I gave you a mortal heart so that you’d love the land. I never intended for your body to rebel so violently against mortality. You were never supposed to be mortal. I see now that even without it, you would’ve loved the land all the same.” His ever calm smile was apologetic, Bèiké found herself instantly forgiving him even though she didn’t fully understand his words in the moment.
“It hurts…” Bèiké sobbed, gripping his kasaya as she’s seen children do a hundred times to their mother’s skirts. “Please, end the pain, I can’t bear to feel their suffering any longer.”
She wanted to scream, but her voice was so damaged, her pleas were barely above a whisper.
But he heard her all the same. He waved his hand, and shooed all onlookers out. Which they did with varying degrees of hesitation, some being pulled out of the room, voices of concern rising.
“At ease child, I can’t end the storm, that’s something only you can do. But I can grant you the clarity to think your next choices through. For the next choices you will have to make are not to be easy.” He nodded and properly sat before her, still allowing her to cling to him in her pain. “I will take some of the blame for that, as it was my well intentioned gift that put you in this position in the first place. Water can never be mortal, I have learned that now, and I will not forget. Mortality only throws off its balance.”
He placed a hand over her eyes, his touch a golden glow. And with that glow…
Came silence.
Sweet, merciful silence.
Bèiké sobbed her relief.
“Oh you poor thing, you’ve been feeling it all, but chained and unable to be apart of it.” A pain pinched his features as he took on her burden to relieve her.
She fought to calm her breaths as relief washed over her. She tried to settle her mind. So much was broken, so much needed mending. “Can you break the chains? Can you revive my control” She looked to him, hoping for an answer.
His expression was one that made her chest tighten ever further as she felt dread hang above her like a damned sword of Damocles. “Alas, maiden of the waters, I cannot. And for that you have my eternal apologies. You have become too mortal… this body of yours… its yin and yang are too broken and out of balance. It will no longer support the job it’s been tasked with.” His voice was gentle even as his words were heartbreaking.
Still, Bèiké pushed forwards. After all, all problems had to have a solution… right? “If it’s the body that is broken, will it not do for me to just shed it and return to the waters?”
The Buddha shook his head. “You misunderstand me child, I speak not of this physical body, but your innermost core. The body of You…. It is not so easily shed.”
She tried to understand his words, what he was saying. And found she could not. “Auspicious One please, help me learn, I am dull-witted. What must I do? Innocents are dying because I’ve lost control.”
A sad look pinches the Buddha’s features. “Pitiful child, I wished there was a simple solution. In order to shed your core… to reclaim your identity as the Worldly waters… You must cease.”
She froze, it felt even as though her heart in her chest paused as a horrible understanding washed over her “…Cease?”
The Buddha looked said, but still he nodded. “Yes… cease. The Jade emperor is tasked with keeping balance, the core of the current imbalance resides in you… in order to quell the storms, to spare the land and break your chains, you must offer that core to him. And with its Oceanic Dharma, he can restore the world. But in doing so… you will cease.”
Her mind raced. It was an answer, a solution… but at what cost? Of course she’d pay it, it was one life compared to millions, the math was easy… but… “…. If I did that… mother’s heart would break….”
“Yes… it will.” He nodded solemnly once again.
The plans she had…. The people she met… “… I made friends, I made promises to those friends…. They would mourn me.”
“More people would mourn you than you realize sweet child, you have become beloved.” He gave her a sweet, sad smile. One that reassured her as much as it broke her heart.
“…. Doing this… choosing to cease… will that save them?” She had to be sure… because what was being asked of her…
She felt a breath of relief wash over her as the Buddha nodded once again, reassuring her worry. “It will restore the balance and bring about the gentle rain and revitalization of the world once more. They will be safe, they will be free to mourn you.”
She stared at him, biting her lip harshly as tears fell fresh, the choice made, her heart and mind settling to the decision she has made. “Then I will do this… for them.”
The Buddha was silent for a moment before he carefully place a hand on top of her head. “I’m sorry for putting this task on you child, please forgive me.”
“We didn’t know… we couldn’t have known. You’re not at fault Auspicious One. There’s no villain to defeat or to place blame on in this.” She offers a shaking smile at him, trying to be brave. “Just a duty to perform… correct?”
The great and merciful Buddha stared at her for a moment before he smiled and nodded, gently reaching to take her hand. “You are truly a Propitious and Filial Child. No matter the outcome, I shall ensure your sacrifice is immortalized. The gentle and tranquil Yìn Zhēnzhū gōngzhǔ, and her love for the land.”
Still trying to keep a brave face, but unable to stop the tears, she sat up straight and kowtowed before the great Buddha. Offering her thanks for both the merciful silence within her mind, and a solution to the great problem.
As the Buddha bid her to rise, she looked up at him, a new determination in her gaze.
“How much time do I have left?…. I…” her face fell again. “I must say goodbye.”
The Buddha nodded in understanding before he looked out the window and contemplated. “I can hold your storm back with my dharma for two days… forgive me child that’s all I can permit. Any more and your core will shatter, the oceanic Dharma housed within will be irreparably damaged and the balance will never be restored.”
Beike kowtowed again. “Thank you Auspicious One… I shall not dare waste even a second of it.”
He led her out of the room where her loved ones, her father, mother, her beloved attendants and loyal guard… even her dear cousin, Erlang Shen all of them were there.
She rushed to hug her mother first, and as she was held by her family, both her and the Buddha explained the situation.
It wasn’t easy…
Her mother had collapsed in grief, even her Sage of a father, the honorable and steadfast great Jade Emperor, let out a sob as he looked upon the two of them in horror.
“Auspicious One, I beseech you, there must be a way to spare my child. We haven’t even had a millennium with her.”
But upon receiving no such solution, He excused himself - after giving his daughter a hug and an order to come and see him tomorrow - to go and grieve in private for a bit with his beloved consort and wife.
The Buddha excused himself next to go and use his dharma to temporarily silence the storms.
Her attendants clung to her and her faithful guard bowed and wept. They asked to follow her and she was quick to forbid it. She needed them to aid in helping her mother. Because she knew her mother would be hit worst by this. They needed to stay alive to grieve her so that they would have her mother, and her royal mother would have them.
And her attendants would be well taken care of, and build their cultivation to become powerful ladies. They would become a force on their own so that they would never, Never need to serve another royal ever again. And her faithful guard would grow in strength, rise in rank, become a great general and never need to depend on her or another king ever again. She held their hands tightly as she made them promise.
It took convincing. But they agreed. Holding their chins high and putting on a brave face as they served their Lady dinner, prepared her room and vigilantly stood guard.
Her beloved people… she never did deserve them…
That left Erlang.
“Are you too going to convince me to try and find another way dear cousin.”
“…. No, the solution came from the Buddha himself, he wouldn’t have suggested it had there been another way…”
“Then what is that look for?”
“…..” He sat next to her and reached out to grip her hand. Fingers entwined, shoulder leaning against hers. “I can’t protect you… I am sorry.”
“You don’t have to apologize Erlang,” she leaned her head against his, allowing him to support her weight. “Besides, my dear cousin, mayhaps one day you will find someone who you can protect, who will drive you crazy and be strong enough that you don’t allow those hovering instincts of yours to rule you… mayhaps one day you’ll have a couple kids, a charming family… a good life.”
She smiles and holds his hand tighter as she watches his face pinch in a pain that has no physical wound.
“And when that day comes, and you’re truly happy, and the sun is setting pink over an orange and purple sky, I hope you gather your children and sit them down under a weeping willow next to a gentle river, and you tell them tales of their silly Cousin-Aunt who would’ve loved and spoiled them so much.”
Tears weld in his eyes, the only thing refusing to let them fall is pride.
“That could’ve been us…”
“No…” She was quick to stop him in the trail of thought. “It couldn’t have been. We are too much alike… we would’ve fought and made each other miserable, you wouldn’t have been able to keep an eye on me the way you need to in order to settle your battle-mind, and I would’ve become odious of the way you hovered and restricted me in the name of safety… and deep down, I know you know this….”
Silence before a pained chuckle and Erlang used his free hand to pinch the corners of his eyes, holding his nose. “You would’ve been an awful wife.”
Beike makes an aghast sound in her throat. “How dare you. I would’ve made an amazing bride.”
“Just not to me?”
“Just not to you… but, I am happy we are family. And I’m happy I was given this time to say goodbye to you…” she leaned her head against his shoulder again. “You’re a good man Erlang. You have such a big heart. Don’t you dare let others take advantage of that okay? And when you do decide you want to take a partner, make sure you’re not blinded by your dedication and choose someone with a good heart, okay? Choose Someone who will love you back wildly and most ardently.”
He looked at her with red eyes for a bit before he nodded and leaned forward to kiss her. And though she tensed, she let him say goodbye.
When he pulled back, he gently caressed her cheek. “I vow to you that I will do as you say. I will carry your name… I will keep them safe.” He glances at her beloved attendants and guard.
Bèiké felt a tightness of worry in her chest loosen as she placed her hand over his. “Thank you Cousin… you have no idea how much that means to me.”
He nodded and stood up, going to take his leave before he stopped, and looked back. “You need to say goodbye to him…. His Birthday is in just a couple dawns. He needs to know, or he will carry that anger.”
Bèiké clenched her fists against her skirts, but loosened them as she sighed and nodded. “I can’t tell him when…. He will try and stop it…”
Erlang nodded then gave a shrug and a whistle. Calling his dog next to his side. “Then don’t tell him when… but he deserved to know as your brother.”
The Water Maiden gritted her teeth. “I hate it when you are correct…”
He smiled and left the room. The hound on his heels.
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Beike had two days… two days to say goodbye.
She wanted to spend most of it with her family, and that first day… she did.
Her beloved attendants and guard stood by her side as she was prepared and escorted to her Royal mother and father.
Together, they wept, and held one another. Then spoke of stories and laughed and remembered. She sang for them and performed for them one last time. Served her mother and father tea. Did her filial duties as a daughter.
Bèiké was unable to stop her tears flowing again as her brothers and sisters arrived as well, coming to embrace her and love her and say their goodbyes. Sharing their own stories with her, singing and celebrating the time she had had with them, with her. Apologizing for past arguments and disagreements, and showing remorse for not accepting her right away.
The Maiden of the Waters listened to them all without interruption, forgave the ones who asked for it and embraced them. Wanting to spend this time as family with no drama’s or petty rivalries.
They all did their best to enjoy the moment without acknowledging too much the impending doom creeping ever closer.
It was everything Beike could’ve wanted as a last day with her family. Forever grateful that she’d been adopted into it.
And it was done too soon, Beike looked out and saw the world in that stage of blue that’s common as the sun sinks that certain level below the horizon…
Day one was done.
She bid farewell to her siblings, sharing her love with them once more. She went and hugged her parents and told them of her plans for tomorrow, how she knew she needed to say goodbye to her sworn brother.
And while her royal mother wanted to spend her last day with her, her father nodded and understood her need to bid farewell. Placating his wife and asking that she only return in the morning so that they may spend some time together before….
He couldn’t finish that sentence, but the Maiden nodded and understood. Giving her word.
With that, she spent the remainder of the night with her beloved attendants and guard, sharing stories and fragile time….
It was when the early morning came about that she got ready. The sun still far from breaching the horizon as she made her way out on her cloud pavilion, her body still chained from rejoining the waters.
She carried a delicately wrapped gift carefully in her lap. The wrappings gold, orange, purple and red and shimmering. Colors that had reminded her of a beautiful dawn, something she had always associated with her sworn brother and his bright personality.
As the great Mountain Huaguo came into view, she felt her chest tighten in nervousness.
Sun Wukong could be unpredictable at the best of times, and completely irrational at the worst. She knew not how he was going to handle this.
She carefully stepped into the water curtain cave and called out. Some monkey Guai she recognized as a general raising his brow at her from his lounging position on the roof. She smiled and gave a polite bow before holding up the gifts to show him.
The general rolled his eyes and disappeared into the palace, Sun Wukong appearing a handful of minutes later. His clothes were not pajamas, though also not his royal regalia. He smiled at her, though his eyes were curious.
“My my! What a wonderful sight! My sister come to visit this Old Sun! And with gifts, a generous woman you are!” He wrapped an arm around her and began to lead her inside. “I feared you were stern with me! Such storms have been beating my mountain! Why, the young ones have all needed to find shelter in high ground! But if you are here with gifts, that clearly mustn’t be so. Though you must satisfy my curiosity Young Pearl. The sun is still a long time in rising, what brings you by this odd hour?”
Bèiké smiled, her voice tight as she answered him and allowed herself to be led. “I will tell you everything, my dear brother. But first, invite me to your table, let us sit. I want to see your smiles as you accept these birthday gifts before I must regrettably darken the mood.”
Wukong paused and looked at her, his smile dropping. “Darken the mood? Pray tell, why must you do such a thing? Has someone dared to insult you? Tell this Wukong and I shall have them apologize.“
Beike shook her head, and patted his hand. “Let us sit first, i shall tell you then.”
Wukong scowled at her vagueness but led her to his dining hall all the same. Sitting them down and getting a pot of tea on the fire.
“There.” He stated. “We have sat, and the tea is brewing, I have done my hostly duty, now explain.”
Beike tried not to laugh, for this was no laughing matter, but she smiled as she handed him the gifts. “Will you not open them first?”
He waved her off as he bared his teeth at her. “You stall. I am impatient young Pearl, what is the bad news you bring?”
Beike sighed before she pulled the gifts back. Staring at her hands before she looked back up at her brother. “I wanted to celebrate with you before I shared the news. I didn’t mean to cause you worry brother. But there’s no easy way to say this.”
She sat up straighter and looked her Sworn brother in the eyes. “Wukong… I’ve lost control, my body has rejected me, my mortality has run up… I don’t know exactly how much time I have left, but.…” she gave a shaky smile. “It wasn’t fair to not come and say goodbye…”
Wukong froze as he took in her words, his eyes searching hers as he searched for a lie, a jest, a deception. “That can’t be…” his hand reached out to grip hers. “You are immortal, that cannot be.”
She gripped him back, her lips beginning to tremble and her sight beginning to blur as she nodded. “It is so… the Buddha himself confirmed it. The only reason the storms aren’t raging this very moment is because he is holding it back…. But dear brother, my mind is broken, my body has failed…”
She shook her head her tears falling. “I did not know how to tell you, but you deserved to know. You are family, I couldn’t leave without saying goodbye…”
“You hush.” Gritted words.
“I wanted so much to celebrate your birthday with you, and see your happy reaction as you open these gifts… I wanted to give you a chance make peace with this.”
“Be silent.”
“I have failed my duties and lives have been lost due to it… I can never make that right, but I need to try and fix this. However I want to still say goodbye. It’s not right to just disappear-“
“HUSH!” Sun Wukong roared as he pushed her down against the pillows, snapping his canines inches from her face. “YOU BE SILENT!”
He shook above her, his breathing harsh, his hands gripping her wrists to the point of bruising. He looked down at her with golden eyes blazing, using his sight to see the horrible truth of the Pearl maiden.
And of course he saw that she was speaking the truth. Her very core was failing, her body all out of balance, her mind being held together by only the Buddha’s Dharma. Oh he knew the feeling of that power intimately well, for he was trapped under it for 500 years. And even that was swiftly breaking under the force of a torrent storm that was only just barely being held back.
His younger sister holding a power within her that was far too large for her current body, and he could see it was quite literally ripping her apart. An awful sight.
“I….” His voice shook as he is mind quickly ran through a hundred different scenarios. “Yes, an idea, I have an idea! I could sneak back to the shadow kingdom, erase your name.”
“Wukong…”
“Lao Tzu has a hundred different medicines, I could go steal a couple again.”
“Brother-“
“The immortality peaches bloom in another handful of days, you could eat them. I could mend your core! I’m sure it wouldn’t be too hard! The Buddha misses things all the time! There must be some loophole. You are immortal, there’s always a way ou-“
His words cut off as the maiden leaned up and buried her face against his neck, pulling her wrists uselessly against his grip.
He shuddered and let out a whine when he felt her tears dampen his fur.
“You… you are not supposed to leave… How are you to leave? Young as you are, the young pearl that has slammed this Wukong with your waters in play. The skinny little princess who has stood up to me more than any of those celestials who dare call themselves warriors… yet you can’t beat this? How dare you…”
“I am sorry brother… you must forgive this Bèiké.”
“I do not! How dare you, you can’t leave. How dare you.” His hands released her wrists only to wrap around her and drag her into a crushing hug.
She of course hugged him back, Sun Wukong had always been steadfast and strong, even when he was angry or stubborn or doing something reckless he always somehow made her feel safe. To feel him tremble against her made her chest tighten to a near painful degree.
“My impulsive brother… please, I need you to make peace with this.” She rubbed his back as she did her best to choke back her tears. “I don’t want to leave with regrets.”
He snarled against her throat but refused to look at her. “You dare ask me to be okay with this? You are selfish.”
She combed her fingers through his fur, desperately trying to comfort him in the way his people do. “Will you let me be selfish in this? I want us to spend the day together, I want to celebrate your birthday early. I want to enjoy my time with my sworn brother and leave with good memories and no regrets…”
Slowly he began to relax and his grip on her loosened. “You ask a lot of this Sun Wukong Bèiké.”
Bèiké blinked rapidly at hearing her brother say her name, but nodded even though she knew he didn’t see her. “I know… I want today to be a good day for both of us… let your little sister be selfish, please?”
Long moments passed before he finally nodded.
“Because I am a good and gracious King and brother… I will do this.”
“You are a wonderful and handsome king.”
“Your praises flatter me sister.”He leaned back and gave her a look. “I… do not like this…”
Beike gave him a shaky smile. “I am not fond of it either… would you rather I left?” She asked genuinely.
Sun Wukong was quick to shake his head. “I would not chase you away. I want to spend the day with you. But alas, it feels odd to pretend nothing is wrong, you sit before me so it feels odd to grieve, yet I see your core shattering…” he rests his forehead against hers. “Would you be stern with me if I hid you away in the mountain where I knew it was safe?”
Bèiké closed her eyes and similarly pressed her forehead against his. “I’d be sad, because I know it would not change anything. You know that too… But… Thank you for caring about me…”
A growl rumbled in his chest. “I am your brother, of course this Sun Wukong is going to care.” A grumpy statement, but one that made Bèiké give a wet laugh all the same.
“I am so lucky to have you as a brother Wukong… the Valiant Victorious Fighting Buddha, strongest in the world. Brave old Sun.”
“…I don’t want to let go…”
Bèiké nodded, but took a deep breath and leaned back to give him her bravest smile. “Come! Let me celebrate your birthday early. No more tears! Let’s smile and make merry.”
It took convincing, and he wasn’t nearly as festivious as he normally was, but he eventually began to smile and laugh as they ate and drank. Some of the denizens of Mount Huaguo joining in on the merrymaking. Loving any excuse to celebrate, why not start the games early?
His eyes glittered at the gifts she had given him, the storm summoning whistle and the abyssal armor. He danced around and showed them off.
As the day grew brighter, more people joined in.
It was… fun.
Music played, the food was good, the games were chaotic and creative, everyone was laughing and smiling. One could almost forget that the Princess had a time limit…
But Bèiké could see when Sun Wukong remembered, he would randomly grow quiet and his brow would furrow. His hand gripping hers as if afraid that if he let go, she would disappear.
Bèiké did her sisterly duty and tried to ease his mind and keep conversation topics away from anything that may remind him. Today was about celebrating, sharing stories and making merry. She had even pulled him out to dance a couple times, both of them clumsy from the wine and making them laugh all the more.
As the sun began to set once more, the maiden of the waters knew she had to return…
She wasn’t about to lie and say that the thought of getting him drunk to the point he passed out, so she could leave without him noticing wasn’t enticing… but she ultimately decided it would be cruel to not give him a chance to say goodbye. And Wukong, seeing the change in his little sister’s demeanor and the far away look in her eye, felt his throat tighten.
“Must you leave already? Ba and Liu are about to get on the drums.” His hands gripping hers tightly.
She smiled sadly and gripped his hands back. “Come to the balcony with me Wukong… come tell me goodbye. Send me off with a smile.”
He snarled, but did so. His mind once again beginning to race as he thought of ways to fix the issue, heal her core…
And Bèiké gently tugged his fur. “You are going to hurt yourself if you keep trying to mend what’s already breaking. You have to let it shatter.”
The gaze he leveled on her was equal parts stubbornness, pain and manic. “How can you ask me to do nothing? I am Sun Wukong!”
Her cloud pavilion materialized as she gently held her brother’s face. “Wukong… I am hurting. My mind has shattered and it’s causing me so much pain… it hurts, and I am so sorry I’m not strong enough to deal with it.” She feels her voice choke as she thinks about what the Buddha told her. Takes a deep breath before smiling at her brother. “Those storms that are so out of control are destroying what is precious, you have always fought to keep your precious people safe. But this time, I have to be the one to fix things… you have to let me do this so that the pain can end.”
He trembled, his eyes squeezing shut as he let out a whine and crushed her in a tight hug.
“I swear to you… I will find a way to fix this. You must hold on young Pearl, promise me you will hold on.”
Bèiké bit her lip as she felt tears well up in her eyes once more… it would’ve been too easy to promise, to trust him, to let him shield her and depend on him…
But as she looked back behind him and saw the lives of the denizens of the mountain that were much more fragile, whom had already suffered and survived so much… whom she didn’t want to risk anymore than she inadvertently already had, she took a deep breath and settled her nerves. She raised her arms to hug him back. The monkey Guai who - from the start of his existence - didn’t know what it was to turn down a challenge.
“I trust in your strength Wukong… protect your people, I will never forgive myself if they come into harm when I am broken.”
He shook his head as he leaned back, giving her a hand as she settled onto her cloud pavilion. “I shall allow no harm to befall them, rest assured. You must focus on your own health. I will reach out to you soon.” He gave her hand one final squeeze before he released her and watched her float away.
Bèiké didn’t dare tell him that she wouldn’t be there to answer him come dawn, and she knew he would be angry at her for that. And she accepted that.
She knew in her heart that, should she ever be reincarnated, she would spend the next several lifetimes making up for the pain she would cause her dear brother when he found out.
She could only pray he would forgive her.
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Bèiké would’ve liked to think she was being brave.
To sacrifice one’s life for the protection of others, especially including beloved friends and family should be an honorable act. And an act that one usually faced with their head held high.
But Bèiké couldn’t pretend that she wasn’t trembling.
The early morning consisted of the Princess spending her final peaceful moments with her family. They sat in silence, both having no words to say and too many to voice, and just holding each others hands.
As the sun began to rise, the Buddha had called upon them. Guiding them to a location in the heart of everything where the ceremony was to take place.
While the world was still calm, the Buddha and his monks set up the area, blessing it and preparing it for what the Jade Emperor and his ever attentive obligation demanded him to do.
The storms had broken free of the Buddha’s great Dharma moments ago, the world was dark even though it was meant to be the middle of the day.
Her beloved attendants had wanted to accompany her to her final destination, but she had forbidden it. Not wanting to risk them. Their goodbyes had been tearful and filled with vows and promises. Beike was unable to bring herself to look back as she walked away, knowing that if she did, she would’ve have the strength to do what needed to happen next.
She stood with her mother and father on an exposed piece of land in the middle of the ocean, they were in the heart of the storm. The honorable and noble dragon kings of the four cardinal directions risking their lives to hold back the storm, allowing the Jade Emperor and his family to stand in the eye of it.
Bèiké sat in the shallow water where the ocean met the sand as the weight of everything crashed upon her. The whisper-screams that the Buddha was still mercifully holding back slamming against the barrier of her mind, making her dizzy.
There was no specific sign or signal that indicated what exactly needed to be done, but it was like a shift in the wind. Her heart pounding in her chest.
She looked up at the black clouds as the monks around her began to chant and she felt her royal father’s strength and power begin to spread over the world and demand its submission. And she felt herself begin to respond to its demands, even as another part of her twisted in defiance and raged all the more.
It was a particularly painful thump that had her clenching her chest as Wukong’s words reverberated in her head.
“If I came up with nothing, had no pompous trickster cursed me, had no imperious scalawag tried to poison me somehow, I would simply assume it was an internal issue and I’d open myself up to take an intimate look.” …. “Take an intimate look….”
“In order to quell the storms, to spare the land and break your chains, you must offer that core to him. And with its Oceanic Dharma, he can restore the world. But in doing so… you will cease.” The Buddha’s words echoed as she realized truly what she had to do.
Her breath quickened as she forced herself to swallow down her fear. She closed her eyes as the faces of her family and friends flashed in her mind. The pain of those who had been lost to her lack of control, the faces of those who would be at risk if she didn’t do what she needed to do.
“I will cease… but they will survive…” She murmured as she felt her hand break past her fragile mortal shell of a body, easily finding her own core. “The sacrifice of one will preserve billions, the trade is worth it.”
She grit her teeth and prepared herself. “It is worth it.” She let out a pained cry as she gave a swift wrench and tore her core free. Hearing the horrified gasps and cries of her parents.
As she held her core out to her father, and begged him to save… everyone, she quickly felt her strength fade.
Despite his horror, the Jade Emperor kept his composure. His strength and power moving his body instinctively to do what needed to be done. He took her core, the blood staining his hands, and the oceanic dharma that flowed within responded to his dominant presence.
He glowed as the wind kicked up and the sky filled with magnificent colors. Energy plunged through the earth and oceans as the balance between land and sea reentered equilibrium. Everything going back to how it was supposed to be and the effect almost immediately becoming apparent.
No longer shackled by a mortal shell, the waters fell back into balance and the world began to heal.
And as the Jade Emperor did his honor-bound commitment, Bèiké felt her mind settle, and the whispers fade. There was a pull to rejoin the waters as was her nature, but the mortal shell she was bound to still held her. She could feel herself fading, her body dying while still desperately trying to survive.
Her heart beating, her blood flowing, her breathing erratic. She distantly wondered if this is what mortals went through, the mind realizing what was happening while the body continued to fight.
The sobbing voice of her beloved mother caught her attention as she found herself embraced in her mother’s arms.
She tried to raise a hand to hold her mother back but found her body was no longer responding. And as she tried to respond to her mother’s desperate Pleas to not leave her, Bèiké found that her voice no longer worked.
As her breathing slowed, the clouds above them finally parted, revealing a truly beautiful view. A dawn of pinks, purples and golds…
It looks like Wukong…. Ahhh… I’m going to miss his birthday…. His heart is… going to…. Break…
As her vision faded to black, she heard a wailing scream that pierced the void…
Her last thought was that it sounded like the purest heartbreak.
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🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊
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It had been sixty years since that day.
The world had long healed. The droughts had been banished, the floods dried up. The fishermen resumed their craft and taught the next generation and the next, and the dead had been buried and honored.
However, mortals still talked about the phenomenon that had been observed on the ocean those sixty years ago.
The magnificent lights and that feeling of protection and security followed by a great cry that shook the world. Most everyone cried that day after hearing that sound; mortals, beasts, Yaoguais and immortals alike wept.
But most memorable of all, was the utter lack of motion of the seas days after the great mourning.
Not a wave, not a breeze, not a current was seen or felt upon the ocean.
It was as though the entire ocean was dead.
It had taken around fourteen days for movement to circulate within and above the oceans again. And from there, life had returned to a relative normalcy.
However, it wasn’t so easy for everyone to simply move on.
The Victorious Fighting Buddha, Sun Wukong had stormed the heavenly palace in anger, demanding an explanation for the ocean’s state and to see his sister. It had taken the Lotus Prince, Nezha, and his lordship, Erlang Shen to placate and comfort the mourning Simian after the unfortunate news of her death had been shared.
The Stone simian had been leaving, intent on heading back to his mountain to grieve with his people, when he had been stopped by the still grieving Lady Mazu.
She had broken royal decorum and invited him over, offering for him to view her daughter’s memorial and offer some final words.
There had been no body, she had solemnly explained, for after her last breath, her body had melted and became water that fell through my hands… all that had remained were the pearls that had always adorned her, and I had collected as many as I could before they rolled and were lost to the water.
It was said that Wukong had broken down before the memorial of the Pearl Princess, though only the Lady Mazu would know for sure.
Though servants and attendants claimed to have seen the two afterwards sitting at a table and sharing stories. When Wukong had gotten up to leave, the goddess had gifted him a pearl that had belonged to the Maiden.
Sun Wukong had not left his mountain much after that, the king remaining dedicated to his kingdom.
Though, there were rumors that drifted around about how he and the phoenix maiden, and sometimes Erlang Shen, would visit that island in the middle of the ocean once a year on the anniversary of the great mourning.
What they did on that island, it couldn’t be said, but those who dared to venture near swore they heard the most haunting melody and a whistle that always seemed to summon a storm.
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🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊
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What a curious thing life is… always finding a way to exist even in places where you would think life would be impossible.
Everything in life has a cycle, for some it’s life and death, for others it’s a constant journey of recycling.
Water is one of the latter, it’s always been here as long as life has existed on this wonderful world. And even before. There is no true death of water, for the water that exists today is the same water that existed billions of years ago.
Water is one of the true immortals, ever present, life bringing and ever flowing.
The ocean is old, timeless and ever shifting, No one truly knows exactly how old the Waters of the world are.
Deep within the depths, the waters churned and swirled in a circular motion, as if creating a cacoon. And as life shaped and formed within it, the beating of a heart reverberated through the ocean.
A light the shown down upon the churning waters, and a voiced ever familiar called out; “You have yet to finish forming, but allow me to be the first to greet you. Welcome back, Maiden of the Worldly Waters… you have been greatly missed.”
Upon hearing that voice, The Maiden of the Waters, for the first time in sixty years, opened her eyes and blinked up at the light above her.
She felt small and yet large, feared but loved, wild and free… and more so than before, she felt unshackled and eternal, endless and ever renewing.
She felt like water.
“Pray tell, Maiden of the Waters, do you know what you want to be?”
The Maiden felt her brow furrow as she thought, snippets of memory, some clear and some blurry filtering through her mind. A previous life, a mortal body… a broken mind.
She wasn’t that person anymore, part of her knew that. She wasn’t shackled by mortality, her mind wouldn’t break as that woman’s did.
Still…
“Maiden? My my, Do you remember who you are?”
The Maiden blinked back up at the light, and allowed her eyes to adjust, seeing the enlightened figure within.
She nodded as she answered.
“I am Bèiké, the Yín Zhēnzhū Gōngzhǔ, filial daughter, sworn sister, the deceptive Tranquil lady, The capricious and unpredictable waters… and I was loved.”
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ModPost;
AHHHHHHHHHH!!! We’ve finally reached the end! I’ve been working on this for two weeks!!!! All the art took me a while too. I hate doing backgrounds but it gave be a chance to test some water colored brushes I purchased and techniques for expressions and poses.
I hope you all enjoyed if you made it to the end! Let me know what you think.
I tried to proofread as I went along, but if I missed anything please forgive me.
#black myth wukong#jttw#journey to the west#jttw oc#black myth: wukong#bèikè#black myth wukong oc#my ocs#lmk#sun wukong#lmk au#my writing#Wukong angst#angst#sun wukong and oc#Sun Wukong x Sister!reader#platonic#angst with comfort#angst fic
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