#rings as soulmate identifiers

[raviraaa]

SOULMATE PROMPT

when soulmates meet for the first time, they‘ll know they have found each other through the ring appearing on the finger where one would place an engagement ring. the ring mirrors the personality of their other half. If both accept their feelings the rings will turn into matching ones, a complete set of identical wedding bands. Once the wedding rings have formed you can‘t deny your feelings, be with or marry anyone else, since you‘ve already found your perfect match.

Removing the rings would equal killing your soulmate, since it‘s til death do us part.

[ x | x ]

[wizardheart83]

[idyllcy]

easter lillies

word count: 2.6k

summary: you thought he wasn't too big on the soulmate thing.

"OW," You hiss as you jolt awake, a sting in your ribs. A flurry of flowers blooms where your soulmate's wound was, making you grimace as you look in your mirror. It's the fifth bruise this week. It really makes you wonder what kind of nonsense your soulmate was up to. It was almost as if they were one of those vigilantes your friends were screaming over. To be fair, you like them too, and he was technically one before.

You like them a normal amount... whatever the hell that means.

You pop a painkiller as you go back to sleep, the rest of your night going undisturbed.

You wake up with seven more flowers sewn across your upper back. But you've grown used to it,  the flowers all treated as some tattoo on your skin, your skin showing where it needs to be, hidden where you don't want it shown. You would prefer that your soulmate didn't have bruises all over his skin, but it made him easier to identify. Well, it made you easier to identify. The flowers all over your skin are more eye-catching than any clothes you wear.

The flowers have been a part of you for as long as you can remember.

At seven, you shrieked when you woke up with flowers all over your legs and skin, sobbing as your parents tried explaining that it was just marks from your soulmate's skin and not some magical demon who had tattooed flowers all over your body.

Somewhere on your soulmate, they have a red flower on their ring finger, a mole you grew up with.

"Iced latte with oat milk!" 

You reach for the cup, pressing the cup to your lips as you head off.

You hiss as a flower blooms on your finger. Seriously? A papercut?

You grimace, exhaling slowly as you press the coffee back to your lips, agitated.

Truth was, you knew who your soulmate was. He was a dead man. Your mother brought home a photo of a young boy around your age, Bruce Wayne's second son, an autopsy done on his body, scars matching your flowers, and you begged her to see him. His funeral wasn't open to the public, but you had shown them the flowers all over your body and how you heard his body was wounded beyond repair, and then finally the autopsy scar you had on your own body, and they let you in. You didn't feel sad that he died. You didn't know him.

but you mourned over what the two of you could have been.

just.

a little.

You didn't ask for anything from Bruce, just a couple of moments to stare at him through the open coffin, checking his ring finger for your red flower, expression falling when you remembered how many flowers were scattered across your body. His name was Jason— Bruce told you. He liked reading books and talking to his teachers, he liked tinkering with cars and his older brother. You were told everything about the boy, his diary given to you as a memorial. 

"Jason would have wanted you to have this." Bruce had said.

You doubt Bruce would have given it to you had he known Jason was documenting all of his adventures as Robin in it. You didn't tell Bruce, you didn't tell your parents, you didn't tell anyone. The boy was dead and you knew it.

At seventeen on a random morning, a new flower bloomed around your ankle. A green one on your heart, and a blue one on your ankle.

You would have passed it off as an error in the universe had you not been screaming in pain when the green one bloomed. You were rushed to the hospital and sedated in tears, the burn too much for you. When you woke up, a blue one on your ankle had formed too, and you were told that your soulmate must be alive. Whether it be from this universe or another, your soulmate was back.

It made you sick to no end. 

That meant that Jason, that poor boy, was resurrected like some science experiment.

Nowadays, you spend your time sorting through papers in Bruce's company, drinking expensive coffee, working a job that you got through connections. Bruce had given it to you without second thought. No one likes sorting through legal documents and risking getting fired because of a single mistake without some sort of insurance. You just wanted a house to live in. You get bored these days. Sometimes when you see a worker's soulmate visit them, you wonder what it would be like if Jason were still alive.

Well, alive legally.

It's kind of hard to find a man that's legally dead but technically alive.

Bruce hasn't told you shit either, and according to Jason's diary... he probably wouldn't tell you anything unless you dragged yourself down to the Batcave yourself. 

and that? you don't plan on.

You settle with working on papers until it's 5, pausing when you notice something that definitely did not belong with the rest of the pile. You don't want to know what the paper was doing in a pile of business documents, but it's not your problem. You should probably get them to Bruce.

You find the rest of the document in the pile and mumble to yourself, dialing the home phone.

"Hello?"

"Alfred." You exhale in relief. "Bruce left um... papers in the office that don't belong here and I don't think they can be shredded... could I send it to the mansion right now?"

"Would you like to stay for dinner?"

"Oh, no. I'll head home after, but I appreciate the thought." You smile. "I'll head over right now."

"I shall bring you some cookies, then."

"Oh... I won't say no to that." You laugh. "See you in twenty."

In retrospect, showing up to Wayne Manor right before sunset was probably not the smartest thing you've ever done, but it isn't exactly the worst thing you've done either. You ring the doorbell and blink in surprise at the sight of... who is this?

"You are?"

"I'm here to hand Alfred some personal files that Bruce got mixed up into the business ones." You tilt your head. "You are?"

"Just call me Jay." He nods. "Alfred's in the kitchen. Should I take you there?"

"Please do." You nod. 

"So who are you?"

"Um, I sort through files in the office. Are you one of Bruce's kids?"

"You're really close with the old man, huh?"

"Not really." You mumble. "You use the connections you have in life when you get lazy."

"Why not just have him fund you?"

"I'm not holding his dead son over his head for something like that." You grumble. "How are you related to him?"

The man's lip quirks up in amusement. "I'm one of his dead sons."

"One? He has more than one dead son?"

He shrugs. "Alfred. The little aide is here."

"My apologies for not greeting you at the door. I shall take the papers from you." He nods. "Here are your cookies."

"Thank you, Alfred." You smile. 

"Master Jason, could you take them back?"

You freeze, staring up at him. "You're Jason?"

"In the flesh." He smiles. "Nice meeting you, soulmate."

You blink at him slowly. "Wow, for a zombie, you look real good."

"Thank you."

"If someone sleeps with you, does that make it necrophilia?"

"I wouldn't go that far, doll." Jason raises a brow at you.

You shrug. "Thank you, Alfred. I'll get going now."

"Will we see you around?"

"Not unless Bruce gets his papers messed up again."

Jason sends you out, but neither of you really talk to each other. He doesn't ask, so you don't give. Besides, it's not as if you could date someone... dead, or something. You're not quite sure what to make of Jason. Well, not like you had to live with him. If your soulmate died once, you're sure you can live another day without seeing him.

Except he can't.

You wake up at 2 with a giant flower in your stomach area, and you shove a painkiller down your throat, heaving as you down as much water as possible to try and speed up the pill's effect, your head spinning. Jason probably got stabbed or something. You don't want to know, but you find that you don't have much of a choice when Dick shows up at your door with Jason in his arms, and you grimace. 

"Sorry for abusing your care, but—"

"If I had a dime for each time I've had to wrap up a bleeding man, I'd be as rich as B." You grumble. "What is it this time? Does he need stitches? Is the mansion too far?"

"Too far."

"I'm fine." Jason coughs. "I can make it back."

"Yeah, with a wound like that? I think the fuck not." You wince as you peel his jacket off, revealing a large gash. "I thought you wore armor?"

"Stabbed through. Human inventions do nothing against foreign forces." Dick mumbles, finding your kit.

You catch as Dick tosses you the first aid kit. "You're paying rent for me this month." You deadpan, resting Jason on your knees as you sterilize a needle. "Any pieces inside the wound?"

"Nothing."

"Scream if you need to." You start on the wound, making haste as Jason throws his head back, gasping as you pierce through his skin to sew it back together. The feeling has long been normalized in your skin as you finish and tie the thread. You wrap the wound, helping Jason sit up when you're done. You look up at Dick, and he sighs.

"We'll cover costs for this month."

"Thank you." You get up. "Anything else?"

"B said you can skip work for the rest of the week." He pauses. 

Right. It's not like B would tell it to your face, but his kids were not slick when it came to crashing your place to get wounds fixed up. You don't know how the word got to them that you had taken a mock-surgery class in high school, but they did not spare you when it came to wound dressing. You don't even know how Robin had managed to find your address when you moved out. Sure, Dick was older than Jason and probably found out somehow, but Robin? Seriously?

"Alright. Now get out."

"What would your coworkers think if they saw you like this?"

"Um... I don't care." You smile. "out."

"Jaybird, aren't you glad your soulmate knows how to close wounds?" Dick sighs. "We're crashing the couch."

"Then don't be loud." You give him a thumbs up. "I'm sleeping. The wound hurts."

"Will do." He nods.

You lock your door as you go back to bed, turning off your alarms as your back hits the mattress, knocking out. 

The sun hits your eyes in the morning when you wake, and the smell of butter flutters through the room as you sit up, slightly confused before remembering Dick brought Jason to your apartment last night. You appreciate that they at least get rid of the suits before knocking on your door. Besides, you think Dick only brought Jason to you and not a safehouse was because you're his soulmate. Soulmates be dammed, you want at least one week where you aren't patching up someone from the Waynes unmasked.

"Good morning." You mumble.

"Morning." Jason nods. "I made breakfast as a thank you."

"Thank you." You mumble. "You'll need a couple of days with a wound like that."

"Did it hurt?"

You raise a brow at him, pressing your mug to your lips.

"What?"

"The wound."

"No. It didn't." You deadpan. "No shit, of course it did."

"I saw... painkillers scattered across the apartment."

"Yeah." You answer him as if it's the most normal thing in the world. It isn't. It's not supposed to be. Jason knows that much. It's not. You know it too. No average person has painkillers scattered across the apartment like decoration. "Why?"

"Is it because I get injured so much?"

You snort.

"No. It's obviously because I got beat to death by a crowbar and had to get sent to the hospital because I didn't die from it, I only felt every single wound inflicted on my body and had to live with it since I'm immortal and all." You roll your eyes. "Oh, not to mention that I frequent the hospital so much that the workers there all know me by name. Oh, don't even get me started on how the pharmacists don't even need me to hand them a prescription anymore. And!!! I'm not even going to think about the fact that almost every inch of my body has been covered in flowers at some point. Though, the autopsy pattern is a great conversation starter at raves." You trail off.

Jason's eyes trail down to your stomach peeking through your shirt.

The guilt. The guilt eats him alive.

"Can we start over?" He blinks slowly. "I... I'm sorry."

"If you're really sorry, you can pull out of the vigilante business." You shrug. "I don't want a sorry. I want less tattoos and less painkillers consumed."

"You seem used to this."

"I woke up with twelve flowers across my back when I turned seven." You pause. "since then, it's been normal to wake up with a couple of new ones... save for the years you were dead."

"Ah." Jason blinks slowly. "I'm sorry. I can't stop."

"I know." You mumble. "Just... stay safe."

"I'll keep that in mind."

But it bites you in the ass as more flowers bloom across your skin, even if they're no longer painful. Small bruises, doses of pain that you've grown used to, doses of pain that no longer affect how your day goes, doses of pain that no longer matter to you. You appreciate that he isn't breaking bones anymore. You sleep through the night much more these days. 

But you don't see Jason.

You wonder...

nope. not possible.

WRONG!

You tilt your head as Dick smiles sheepishly at your door again. This time, he's the one bleeding.

"Sorry, too far away from the mansion, and Dickhead insisted on visiting." Jason explains. "He's not dying. He just needs some ice."

"You'd think he's impossible to be harmed, huh?" You let the two in. "So? Are you leaving by car?"

"We'll figure it out." 

You lay Dick on the couch as you wince at the bruises on his body. "You must really hate your soulmate."

"She hates me too. We're even." Dick smiles.

"I don't doubt that." You mumble. "Seriously." You dress his wound, sighing. 

There's an elephant in the room. Now you forgot whether or not Dick knows you know he's Nightwing.

Maybe he does..? You don't remember, and you're too tired to ask.

"I'm kicking you out after this."

"You let us stay when Jaybird was hurt but not when I am?" Dick gasps in faux offense.

"You're not my soulmate. Shoo."

Dick sighs dramatically as Jason takes him out, and you toss Jason your car keys.

"Drive him back."

"Will do. I'll get it back to you tomorrow."

"Take your time. I don't need to get anywhere anyway."

Jason is... strange. You're not used to his presence around you. 

He drops by your place with every single excuse in the book— he's got a bruise, he's out of eggs, he's hungry, he got a free drink from the store and thought of you. You don't know. Quite frankly, the fact that Jason dropped by so often was concerning. What the hell was he even doing? You thought he didn't like soulmates.

"I brought—"

"I set the table already." You sigh, letting him in. "I thought you didn't like soulmates?"

"It may have..." Jason goes quiet, last word coming out as incoherent mumble.

"Hm?"

"May have grown on me." He whispers. 

You blink at him slowly, eyes wide as you stop to stare at him.

"What."

"The whole... soulmates thing." He swallows, suddenly feeling shy. "Grew on me."

Your cheeks grow warm as you stare at him with wide eyes, heart racing in your chest. "It grew on you?"

"It grew on me."

"Yeah?"

Jason smiles. "So I'd like to..."

"Better be worth it, corpse boy."

"I promise." Jason whispers. "I promise."

[yutasbellybuttonpiercing]

Soulmatch™ — App-grade your love life!

(new picture bc this is the renjun i imagined in this)

pairing: huang renjun x reader

au/genre: smut, humor, fluff, angst, strangers to enemies to lovers...?, non-idol!AU

characters: huang renjun, f!reader, best friend!jaemin, best friend!haechan, friend!chenle, renjun's parents

word count: 24.807 words (oh my god)

general warnings: mentions of cheating, men being dudes and dudes being bros, lack of communication, haechan is a milf hunter, trust issues, insecurities regarding relationships, hook ups, smoking, alcohol, mentions of vomit (nothing graphic or detailed, literally just the word), mentions of erectile dysfunction (???), emotional manipulation..? past na jaemin x reader, implied past huang renjun x wong yukhei / lucas, toxic masculinity, daddy issues, haechan and jaemin talk very vulgarly and do not know boundaries, mentions of virginity, crying, heartbreak, author makes use of their limited knowledge of tarot.

smut warnings: ...hate sex...?, unprotected sex (nuh-uh!), fingering and brief oral (f receiving), face-fucking, switch!renjun, switch!reader (?), pet names, a lot of imagining sex, brief choking, mentions of anal, creampie.

synopsis: Renjun is a hopeless romantic, his goal is to meet his perfect match by the end of the year, maybe even his soulmate. The perfect solution: an experiment for finding love through an app. Renjun doesn't care who it is, as long as they're a perfect match, he thinks. But then you show up...

a/n: i really love this so much. it's a bit different from what i usually do bc it has a real storyline! it's complicated (not really)! i really poured my heart and soul into this. i love renjun so much. argh! also, why do my endings always feel rushed???? help???

taglist: @she-is-dreaming @nctzennikki09 @babyjenono @noonaisreading

"Why the fuck do they need information on my favorite toys from ages five to ten?" Renjun groans, rubbing his temples before quickly grabbing ahold of his phone to facetime his mother. The ringing sound of his phone had always managed to annoy him, and he wonders whether there'd be a section in the forms where he could put that down.

Staring at himself on his screen, he fixes his brown hair. It had gotten quiet long over the past few weeks since his last haircut. Admittedly, he hasn't had the energy to leave the house, really, thankful for his freelancer job that allows him to work from the confines of his own four walls. Although, he'd thought about growing his hair out anyway.

Finally, his mother answers the phone.

"No, it's Renjun... No, turn the TV down! Down! Lower the volume," his mother shouts, not at him, but at what he could only assume is his father, judging by the Jackie Chan movie playing in the background, that after all these years, he can identify by the sounds only.

"Hello, Junnie," his mother finally addresses him, a gentle smile on her face, a harsh contrast to the annoyed frown she'd thrown at her husband earlier.

"Hey, mom," Renjun says, tapping on his own video so it would fill the screen instead of his mother's.

"How are you doing?"

"Fine, fine. Uh, listen. Do you remember which toys I liked when I was 5?" Renjun finally lets his hair fan over his forehead in peace, getting frustrated that it's not staying in the exact place he wants it to. He's only talking to his mother anyway. That woman'd wiped his ass a few years back, so why bother.

"What an odd question," she grins, briefly getting distracted by something happening behind her phone which she shoos away with her hand and a tight lipped frown that disappears as soon as he lays her eyes back on her son.

"I just need to know. It's really important."

"Okay, let me think. I believe you liked this one thing- this squishy" – her hand squishes the air in front of her phone – "what is it called?"

Renjun can hear his father's voice from behind the phone, "what? Plushie?"

"Yes! You had a plushie that you really liked!"

"A plushie..." Renjun mumbles, filling the letters into the field, "what color?"

"It was a cow."

"So black and white?"

"Those are the usual cow colors."

"Okay. And when I was six?"

"Honey, what do you need this for? Is it still this love calculator thing? You know I read that article about it online-" His mother raises her brows in concern.

"Yes, but I didn't want to say it, because-" Renjun's words get cut off by his father's obnoxiously loud voice as he yanks the phone from his mother's hands, his big head coming into view and Renjun has to immediately roll his eyes.

"That's nonsense, son, and you know it. Anyway, when will you come by again? I bought steak. You know no one can make steak like I do!"

"Yes, I know. I won't be able to make it any time soon, though." Renjun sighs, fingers fiddling with a loose string sneaking its way out of the couch cushion.

"What if I told you we had some fine wine?" – "Stop dragging our son into alcoholism," Renjun's mom finally wins the phone back, but Renjun can still hear his dad's laugh in the background.

Renjun huffs. "So? Year six?"

"Honey, I'm really not sure. You've had a fire truck phase, then enjoyed dinosaurs, then couldn't get enough of those collectable horses. You were a very diverse kid with so many different interests. I don't think you can categorize that or sort it into years. Just say that you liked all kinds of toys–"

"Even girls' toys!" His father laughs.

"Alright," Renjun sighs, pressing his lips tightly together before wishing his mother a good night and ending the call.

"All kinds of toys..." Renjun mutters to no one but himself as he types his answer into the box, shaking his head. He's been filling out these forms for days on end, and slowly he starts believing his parents' words that it's just nonsense.

But it is his only hope.

_____

"A what for what?" Donghyuck asks, mouth as full of burger as Renjun's own, hence why he couldn't understand him the first time. Renjun holds up his hand, chews aggressively, then swallows hard.

"An experiment for finding love," he explains a second time, and the crease in between Donghyuck's eyebrows only seems to be getting deeper with every word that leaves Renjun's lips.

"What the fuck is that?" Donghyuck asks (assumingely, Renjun still can't understand him over the huge bite of patty and bun inside of his mouth).

"You give a whole bunch of information about yourself to the scientists, and they use some software to find your ideal partner," Renjun explains briefly. There's a bit more to it than just that, but he doesn't want to overwhelm Donghyuck's brain while he's eating.

"Pff, okay?" Donghyuck says, a few crumbs of- whatever that had been only mere seconds ago flying out of his mouth and directly onto Renjun's forearm. The older contorts his face in utter disgust, shaking the sticky pieces of food off of his skin.

"You're a pig, Donghyuck," Renjun states, wiping the spot with his napkin because he can still feel Donghyuck's saliva on himself.

"I might be a pig, but at least I got game." Donghyuck finally swallows, grinning proudly with a small piece of lettuce stuck in between his teeth which Renjun has yet to decide telling him about after that insult.

"You don't have 'game'," Renjun spits, fingers motioning quotation marks, "you just have low standards. You'd fuck everything that bends over in front of you."

"That is not true!"

"Need I remind you of what happened with Chenle's mom?"

"She is a milf!" Donghyuck whines, letting his hands weakly fall down onto the table.

"Whatever." Renjun sighs. "Point is: I'm not lacking game, I just want to wait for the right person."

"Alright, two explanations, same outcome: your dick is dry as fuck," Donghyuck nods, pointing his fry at Renjun before he drags it through his vanilla milkshake and stuffs his mouth with it. Renjun presses his lips together, frowning slightly as he imagines the taste of that. "So when are you getting banged?"

"I don't want to get banged, Hyuck," Renjun answers, fingers coming up to rub at his temples. He knows he's lying, Donghyuck knows he's lying, so why did he lie? "There is more to it than sticking my dick up a hole."

"Just any hole? You didn't specify that it should be a pussy?" Donghyuck's eyes widen and he stops his motions. Renjun watches anxiously what a large amount of time Donghyuck's been holding a new fry into his milkshake for.

"I didn't. I don't care."

"You'd shag a dude?!" Donghyuck's shrill voice attracts the eyes of several people sitting around them.

"I don't know why you needed to let everybody know about that," Renjun say through gritted teeth, "but yes. I don't mind."

"I didn't know you were bi," Donghyuck finally sucks the fry into his mouth, then cleans his fingers with his tongue.

"I'm pan."

"Same thing."

Renjun opens his mouth to protest, but he's honestly a little drained to dispute with Donghyuck right now. Wow, what has he become...

"So, when are you finding real love, then?" Donghyuck tries again, empathically sensing that he just scratched at Renjun's teasing-limits and should therefore tone it down a little before he loses a friend.

"I finished filling out the forms a couple of days ago. They have to analyze it and then find someone in their data base. I'm not sure how long it's going to take," Renjun explains, losing a tad of hope with every word at the realization. It's probably going to take forever.

"Okay, then what do you say: one last time going out on pussy hunt with the boys?"

_____

Renjun realizes that this is not one of his proudest moments as he stands leaned against the bar. On the outside, he might look cool and relaxed (or at least that's what he strives for), but he's honestly close to being shit-faced and needs the bar for not losing his balance. Admittedly, it's been some time since Renjun's last time out and he's been a bit nervous.

"This is great, huh?" Chenle says next to him, cool as ever as he leans his back against the bar, keeping his balance with only his forearms. Renjun envies him.

"Totally," Renjun retorts sarcastically, but Chenle doesn't seem to pick up on it.

His other friends had already abandoned him, always with a dirty grin as they got dragged away by a pretty girl. Renjun just can't get behind this whole thing of hook-up culture. Why would you want that when you could- never mind, Renjun understands why people hook up. He really shouldn't judge other people when he's the one who signed up for a love experiment.

"So I heard this is going to be your last time going out with us?" Chenle asks, then takes a sip from his beer bottle. Renjun likes hanging out with Chenle, but the younger's busy schedule doesn't offer much time for friend activities. Chenle is generally laid back and doesn't judge others. Well, not really, he just likes to tease, but generally speaking, he is a good person to open up to.

"Yeah," Renjun answers shortly, not in the right state for a long conversation.

"Because of that love app?" Chenle asks, and Renjun briefly looks over at him to see a teasing smirk tugging at the corners of his lips.

"Yeah," Renjun repeats in defeat.

"I think it's cool," Chenle says, corners of his mouth turning downwards making him look impressed, but Renjun doesn't seem convinced. "You know, real love. It's rare these days, I think it's admirable. Really."

"Thank you," Renjun says, a gentle smile on his lips. "Hyuck's been teasing me a lot for it, but I just.. don't like this hook-up culture. I want to settle down."

"I get you, man." Chenle nods, clinking his beer bottle with Renjun's glass that contains the last few drops of a cocktail, then empties his bottle. As if on command, a girl leans against the bar next to him, whispers something into his ear while tugging at his sleeve. A grin forms on Chenle's face before he turns to Renjun.

"Sorry, gotta go. She says she needs Daddy." Chenle winks at Renjun who gives him a combination of a genuine chuckle and an awkward smile in return, then waves at Chenle's figure getting dragged towards the restrooms.

Renjun sighs, then his eyes scan the crowd. It's stuffy, the fog machine on a too high setting making it hard to even make out faces. It also feels hot, no wonder considering the amount of bodies dancing and sweating to the sound of the music, and the entire atmosphere feels too uncomfortable to find someone he could- sleep with. All of his friends are gone anyway, there's no way they could check if he got with someone or not. Sighing once again in defeat, Renjun decides to call it a night. He steadies himself, then tumbles over to the door, pushing it open to be hit by cool air. He immediately feels like he's drank 2 glasses of alcohol less than he actually did.

"Cigarette?"

_____

"This is not something I want to brag about," Renjun says the noon after, his butt placed on a chair in Donghyuck and Jaemin's man cave. It's actually just their shared home, but judging by the looks and smell of it, Renjun cannot not call it a man cave.

"Couldn't get it up?" Jaemin asks, an understanding nod moving his head. The younger looks messed up, respectfully, his hair tousled and eyes still not completely adjusted to being awake, the size of the cup of coffee in his hands an indicator of how he's feeling right now. Donghyuck really doesn't look any better, his body leaned over the table with his forearms supporting his weight.

"What? No!" Renjun shakes his head with a frown. He really loves his friends, but sometimes he wonders why he's even friends with them.

"Did you puke on her?" Donghyuck covers his mouth with his hand. Yeah, Renjun wonders in times like these.

"No."

"Did she puke on you?"

"No! There was no vomit involved," Renjun explains, eyes widened in alarm. This conversation slowly but surely makes him wonder how his friends' hook-ups tend to go... not that he wants to know, considering all this talk about throwing up.

"Then why are you not sharing every single detail?" Jaemin grins, scooting his chair closer to Renjun until he's uncomfortably pressed up against his cheek, reeking like coffee and sleep.

"Because..." Renjun frowns in defeat. "Because she was gone this morning."

"And? What, are your balls itchy?" Donghyuck raises his brows.

"What? Why would my balls be itchy?" Renjun whines, finally peeling his cheek away from Jaemin. "She didn't give me an STD, nor an UTI. W-we used a condom, I think."

"You think?" Donghyuck laughs, straightening his back from being leaned over the table for too long. "Did our Renjunnie hit it raw?"

"Honestly, I don't know why we're talking about this?"

"Did her pussy grip you too tightly to pull out?" Jaemin asks, nodding understandingly while padding his shoulder, "happens to the best of us."

"You're a maker, Renjun," Donghyuck adds.

"First of all, I don't know what that means. Second of all: the sex was fine! Great even-" Renjun tries to defend himself and his hook-up, even though he's not entirely sure why, considering she, well, left without a trace.

"Did she smell good?"

"What, her vagina?"

"Everything."

"Uh- yes? She used perfume, and everything else smelled healthy, I guess. But what I'm trying to say is-"

"Jaemin you bastard! You really have a problem, fucking panty sniffer!" Donghyuck laughs loudly, making Renjun instantly aware of his own hangover.

"Sue me," Jaemin leans back grinning, hands coming up in faux defense.

"It bothers me that she snuck out without even saying anything!" Renjun shouts, palm coming down on the table top with such force that both of his friends jump. It goes silent for a while until Donghyuck opens his mouth once again.

"I understand, man." He leans forwards, placing a palm on Renjun's shoulder. "That was really disrespectful of her." "Not cool," Jaemin chimes in supportively. "But look on the bright side: you'll never have to see her again."

"I guess that's true," Renjun mumbles, "but-"

"But?"

Hesitantly, Renjun looks into Jaemin's face, then into Donghyuck's. "It was really good."

Chaos breaks loose, both of them cheering loudly. Donghyuck begins laughing until his knees hit the floor – an impressive action considering the amount of alcohol his system has to fight – and even Renjun manages to crack a smile.

_____

"Jun, you might wanna see this," Donghyuck proposes hesitantly from the other room. Renjun, already annoyed about having to make his way all over to the living room and abandoning his brewing tea, sighs. What in the world could be important enough to summon him from the kitchen?

"Can't it wait?"

"Believe me when I say you might wanna see this."

Renjun aggressively throws his hands in the air for no one to see, he can't live in peace for even a second with this guy. Still, he stomps over, standing in the door frame with furrowed brows and crossed arms. "I swear if this is some stupid shit again-"

"It's your dating app."

Renjun rolls his eyes, "they've been sending useless messages for the past four months, I don't fucking care."

"It says they found a match." Donghyuck finally looks up from Renjun's phone, eyes wide and mouth shaped into an 'o' form. Renjun's own eyes bulge out at the preposition. "What?!"

He stumbles over, ripping the device from Donghyuck's fingers and holds it close to his face. Indeed, there's the notification. They found them. They found someone!

"Man you should really get your eyes checked if this is how-"

"Shut the fuck up, I'm the happiest man alive!" Renjun beams, smacking Donghyuck in the back of his head without lifting his gaze from the screen. Donghyuck mewls, and it sounds a little too much like a moan, but everybody knows Donghyuck is a little pain slut, so Renjun pays him no mind.

Renjun instead klicks on the notification, the application he hasn't visited in over half a year popping up slowly. There it is. The moment Renjun had anticipated for such a long time. He's a little disappointed that he can't visit this person's profile or anything, but he quickly forgets about it as his eyes land on a button that spells: 'send an invitation'.

"Hyuck, you have to go," Renjun announces, causing Donghyuck to lift his head, gaze drifting away from his own phone screen to look at Renjun perplexed.

"Eh?"

"Leave! I have to get ready," Renjun whines, peeling Donghyuck off of his couch by his wrist. Donghyuck complies balky, but lets himself get pushed out of the front door that Renjun closes in his face immediately, then rushes into the bathroom.

The invitation was sent for tonight, 8 pm. That means he has four hours to get himself and this shit hole he calls his home ready, and the task seems nearly impossible. That is until he finds himself, embarrassingly out of breath, ruffling his hair one last time in front of the mirror by the front door before the doorbell rings. He made it just in time.

His hands shake as he presses the button that opens the door, and a little harder even as he grips the handle to open the door to his apartment.

"Get a grip," he tells himself quietly, then puts on a smile as he listens to the footsteps climbing the staircases. His heart beats rapidly against his ribcage as his eyes focus on where is soulmate is going to appear in the next few seconds.

There, a foot comes into sight, followed by...

"You?!"

Silence.

"Hi?"

"I'm gonna need a minute-"

After splashing cold water in his face in the bathroom and pulling himself together, Renjun comes back to find you sitting on his couch, looking a little nervous, but generally contained and not as bothered by this disaster as Renjun. Sitting down, Renjun watches the arms move slowly over the face of his antique clock that with every passing second omits an obnoxiously loud ticking sound that is only overshadowed by the thick tension hanging in the air. Every once in a while, his gaze traces your form on the farthest end of Renjun's couch, staring blankly at the wall.

"Why did you sneak out?" Renjun puts his thoughts into words, eyebrows scrunched together in a mixture of anger and disappointment.

"It was just a hook-up," you turn your head to whine at him, "I don't know why you're making a big deal out of this?"

"Because it-" Renjun starts, but then decides that he'd much rather not appear pathetic in front of you for moaning about that being his last sexual encounter before formally agreeing to wait for the one.

"Alright," you sigh after a while, "I'm sorry, alright?"

Renjun clears his throat and nods, "okay. Thank you."

"I'd much rather talk about the important things right now," you say, turning your entire body to sit cross-legged on the couch facing Renjun. You take a deep breath before opening your mouth again. "I'm just going to say what everyone here is thinking: the app obviously made a mistake."

Renjun's eyebrows fly upwards as he blinks once, very slowly, "excuse me?"

"Yeah. I mean, no offense, but you're obviously a softie! And I like tall men,-"

"I don't think I'm getting this right, you fucked me before?!"

"Yeah, it was fine for a night, but-"

"And why am I a softie- or, first of all, why is that bad? We both did the experiment, we're both looking for a perfect match, or am I wrong?" Renjun did not even notice getting up from his place on the sofa, or when he started pointing an accusing finger at you.

"I don't know, you take it so serious-"

"And you're being a real bitch right now." Renjun furrows his brows even further as you get up as well to stand right in front of him, your pointer finger pushing into his chest.

"I do not appreciate you calling me that."

"I have done nothing wrong, I cleaned this whole place, and even when I realized that it had to be you, of all people, I was willing to work with it, but right now, I just want to..."

Renjun realizes how close you are to him right now, he can smell your perfume, the same scent you'd worn the other night. Even if it was whole while ago, he still remembers the dusty note that now once again tickles his nostrils, immediately taking him back to that night.

"...kiss you."

Renjun hasn't even closed his mouth before your lips press against his, your passion wild and untamed as your bodies press closer, your hands immediately going to his hair, gently pulling so it stings at his scalp as Renjun's own hands roam over your form to settle on your waist and ass.

His head is clouded, his mind hazy with the feeling of you against him. He's a little embarrassed of your affect on him, immediately growing hard in his pants as soon as you hump yourself against him, content sighs flowing from his mouth into yours.

It's hectic, hands touching everywhere at once all of a sudden, fingers clutching clothing in an attempt to rid the other of them, limbs tangling as Renjun moves the both of you to the nearby bedroom.

You somehow manage to peel yourselves out of your clothes, Renjun can feel how wet you are for him, and though he's so focused on only you, he can't help but comment spitefully, "you prefer tall men, huh?"

"Fuck you," you gasp before kissing him again, and Renjun does not quite know how to feel about this, maybe it's bad, maybe it's good, but he assumes that this type of behavior should not make his tummy fill with butterflies. It still does.

Renjun lines himself up with your hole, then thrusts forward. He doesn't take his time to prep you like last time, he finds that if you want to act like a bitch, you should be treated like one. He's also very perplexed that he's thinking like this, he never has, but he guesses you bring this side out in him.

You cry out in pure bliss as he stretches your walls that are struggling to take his size, your eyes rolling back at the overwhelming pleasure. Renjun's thrusts are quick and hard, ramming his tip against your spot in a way that makes you see stars and your thighs shiver around his waist.

Your orgasm approaches fast, almost embarrassingly fast considering you made such a fuss earlier, Renjun admits to himself, feeling proud as he pushes you over the edge with ease. The moans tumbling from your lips are nothing short of pornographic, and Renjun does not have it in him to shut you up for the sake of his neighbors.

Instead, he pulls out, then quickly replaces his cock with his fingers, pressing them upwards repeatedly to tickle another quick high out of you. His eyes are on you the entire time while yours are closed, assumingely overwhelmed with how good he's making you feel.

Once you writhe from overstimulation, Renjun removes his fingers as well, licking a fat stripe over your cunt before turning you around and pressing your face into the sheets.

"I'll show you how much of a softie I can be," he grunts before pushing in once again, his hand pressing against the back of your head as he crashes his hips into yours with such force that the bed frame penetrates imprints into his wall. Your moans are muffled, and Renjun decides that he'd much rather have his neighbors hear how good of a fuck he is, so he grabs a fistful of your hair and yanks you up.

"Oh God," you whine, back arching beautifully to take even more of him, and Renjun suppresses a coy grin at the fact that he's able to destroy you that easily.

"Hm? Not so soft now, huh?"

"I'm gonna cum again-" you announce, hands gripping the sheets as you try to ground yourself, to just take and take and take what Renjun gives you, and soon after he can feel you clench around him as another orgasm takes over you, leaving you weak and shaky.

"Too much?"

You shake your head, but Renjun pulls out nevertheless. "Get on your knees, I want you to suck me off."

Never in his life has Renjun seen someone hurry off a bed so eagerly. You open your mouth compliantly, like a well trained slut, and Renjun can simply push his cock between your lips and fuck your mouth. "Tap my leg when I should stop."

You nod quickly, then relax your jaw for him to use you. Renjun loves this sight of you. He remembers what you looked like when you came over, with pretty makeup and perfectly styled hair – and now everything's ruined, your hair messy and tangled, your makeup smudged by a mixture of tears and spit. Renjun loves how hazily your eyelids flutter as you try to look up at him, eyes seemingly focussing and un-focussing, more tears welling up in your eyes before they trickle down your cheeks, spit coating your chin as you gag a little.

Renjun believes he could get used to this.

_____

The sun tickling the tip of his nose is what wakes him up the next morning. With a groan, he tries to adjust his eyes to the bright light shining into his bedroom – the downside of having a bedroom that faces east. Once he realizes where he is, the memories of last night come flying back to him. He has to find his arms to be much emptier than when he went to bed the night before. He sighs, a hand coming up to run over his face. Honestly, he didn't even have to check the rest of his home to know that you snuck out again.

A mug filled with coffee in hand, Renjun lets out a shaky sigh. It stings, he's not going to lie, but maybe you have your reasons, maybe something came up, maybe you need time to think. Or maybe you just hate him and only want to use his desperate state of romanticism and body for your selfish nature.

This assumption is neither proven to be false nor correct when his doorbell rings a couple of months later. In the meantime, Renjun had done nothing but sulk, try to pull himself together, work non-stop to get you out of his mind, realized it's not working and went back to sulking, then the cycle repeated itself. He hadn't even updated his friends about the encounter for a lack of energy, basically. His apartment is a mess, empty to half-empty boxes of takeout littered all over the place, bottles with a last sip left left and right that Renjun trips over every few hours only to curse loudly and do nothing to clean them up afterwards. Basically, he's living like Donghyuck and Jaemin right now.

His feet drag him to the door. "Hello?"

"They're threatening me."

Renjun, without even having heard it twice through the speaker, recognizes your voice immediately. And before he knows it, his finger presses the button that opens the door with a buzzing sound. He curses at himself, panic arising as he listens to your heavy footsteps climbing up the stairs to his apartment. Once you step into sight, Renjun loses his ability to talk. Why do you have to look gorgeous? Why does he want to get on his knees and eat you out immediately? Why is he so weak?

You take fast steps and invite yourself into Renjun's home as he does nothing but take a few careful steps back. You then lock the door as you check the hallway behind the door through the peephole for any potential threats.

"Who?" Renjun finally gets out.

"The app developers," you mumble before retrieving from the door.

"Why?"

"They know I left, now they keep threatening me."

"I doubt that," Renjun frowns.

"Look!" You push your phone into his hands. Renjun curiously scans the last notifications the app sent you.

How did it go? Did you find your soulmate with us? Please rate us in the app store.

Hey! We found your soulmate! Now all you need to do is rate this experience.

Your soulmate is happy to have you. Thank you for working with us, please leave a rating in the app store.

Rate your love experience now!

Renjun snorts.

"What?" You watch him with furrowed brows and crossed arms.

"These are hardly threats."

"They just keep coming, this has to be a threat. Haven't you gotten any?"

"I don't know, I don't have the app anymore," Renjun mumbles.

"Right..." you say, finally taking a first look around the place. "And what happened here?"

"Stop judging me!" Renjun turns his back to you while crossing his arms. Of course he hadn't had the time to deep clean his apartment when he was busy sulking and writhing in self-pity for the past months. And, to be fair, it was all your fault!

"Alright, maybe they're not threats, per-se. They still made me feel bad..."

"Oh?" Renjun turns back around, eyebrows raised. "It has a heart?"

"Ha-ha," you deadpan, but Renjun can't suppress a smile as he makes his way over to the kitchen to grab himself something to drink, and you kicking your shoes off, and then following him on track like a lost puppy.

Renjun opens the fridge and pours himself a glass of the fruity water he's prepared a few hours ago (not because he felt like it, only because he was afraid the remaining fruit his mom brought over because she coincidentally happened to be in town a few days ago would go bad if he didn't use them). He lifts the glass to his lips and takes a refreshing sip.

You watch him set the glass down on the counter. "Aren't you going to ask me if I want something?"

With a hint of playfulness that he does not want to give away under any circumstances, Renjun scoffs, "yeah, as if I'm going to be nice to you after the stunt you pulled. Twice." Renjun holds up two of his fingers to highlight his words.

Your brows furrow as you open your mouth to complain, but you must have realized he's right, so you shut it again, turning into a cute pout instead. "I'm sorry. It's just- it's hard-" You give up and press your lips together tightly. "Can we- start over?"

"Oh? From what point?" Renjun raises his brows, lifting his hand to count with his fingers, "when you abandoned me the first time? When you insulted me? Or when I fucked you so good you couldn't stop drooling on the sheets?" He smiles in victory at your shocked expression. "To which I could also add: the first or the second time." He wiggles two fingers in front of your face with a smug smirk.

"I wish I could say this behavior of yours irritates me to the point where I just want to give up, but you're kind of hot looking all messed up and heart-broken because of me while sporting that victorious grin," you say and step towards him.

"Ah, really?" Renjun's confident shell starts to crumble.

"Why don't we start from the beginning?" You stop right in front of him, and Renjun has to press his ass against the counter to keep that little distance that allows him to breathe. Amused, the corner of your mouth twitches, then you extend your hand as your gaze bores into his.

"Hi, my name is ____ and I would love to suck your cock."

Renjun hates the way his breath hitches as he carefully shakes your hand for a reason he is not aware of. "I-I'm Renjun," he simply says, and the playful smirk on your face widens as you pull your hand out of his to lay atop of the waistband of his sweatpants. Renjun hates it even more that he feels his blood that just milliseconds ago thumbed through his ears now rushing downwards awakening his cock.

"Do you want me to suck you off?" Your voice is bittersweet as you bat your lashes at Renjun who gulps before breathing out a "yeah".

You smile, fingers untying his sweatpants before you push your hand inside to feel him up. "So hard, all for me? What a good boy you are, Renjun."

Renjun bites down on his lip, face contorting in pleasure as he feels you feel him up and down, his hips push forward involuntarily. Why do you have to be like this? Why can't you just be- less enticing, less hot, less able to turn his brain to complete mush every time he sees you? Renjun knows where this is going, you're going to give him the best, most amazing, jaw-dropping, eye-rolling, toe-curling head of his life, and then you're going to walk out that door as if there aren't still drops of Renjun's cum trickling down your esophagus.

Just as your hands leave the inside of his pants to pull them down his legs, Renjun grabs ahold of your wrists. Your eyes widen in surprise.

"No," Renjun catches your gaze that holds a whole lot of insecurities in them, or so he assumes. "I am not letting you touch me until I know you won't leave me again."

The look in your eyes tells him that something about this interaction hit a nerve very deep down, so he tries to lighten the mood with a light joke and a careful smile. "At least take me out on a date before you use me."

Jackpot, he realizes, as you scoff and pull your wrists from his grasp. "Alrighty then, what do you want to eat?"

_____

The wideness of his eyes expands exponentially with every word you tell the guy behind the counter of the nearest Subway who prepares your sandwich. He could mouth along your order because, even up until the sauce, it's identical with his. Hence, all he tells the guy once he's finished is "the same". You seem not to notice – or care – and the quick walk back home is quiet despite the tornados of thoughts winding through Renjun's mind. Is this how the app worked? Match people with similar taste in food? Though he doesn't remember putting his Subway order in when submitting his forms.

Arriving at home, you ask Renjun to put on a show to watch while eating, and when he plays his all time favorite, Modern Family, you announce that that's your favorite as well.

Renjun watches, half in awe and half scared for his life, as you practically inhale the foot-long sandwich in front of his eyes, and he feels his heart thumb just a little faster seeing you all domestic like this; not dolled up, and not with his cum dripping from some part of your body, just you being you. Apparently, he likes you more than he likes to admit, he's afraid.

"I think I'm going to delete that app as well," you announce as you wipe the remaining sauce and crumbs from the corners of your mouth.

"How so?"

"I have you now, don't I?" You shrug, placing your plate on the coffee table in front of the couch. Renjun's heart jumps at your words, then sighs and happily sinks deeper into the comfort of his chest.

"Does that mean- I mean-" But he is shushed by your finger pressing against his lips, that makes his eyes widen.

"Shh, baby boy, don't ruin it." You say, then get up.

"Where are you going?"

"Will you calm down? I just want to pee!" You whine, then march off towards his bathroom, and Renjun wants to punch himself in the face for watching you go with a smitten gaze, but he can't help staring. You're just too gorgeous. He loves the way you're so relaxed and funny, sighing lovingly as he admires your beauty coming back from the restroom to sit down next to him with a thud and a weirded out expression on your face.

"Why are you looking like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like I just took your virginity in a field of dandelions."

"I am not!"

"Whatever. Can we fuck now?"

The little hearts circling around Renjun's heart – metaphorically – shatter. "Are you being serious?"

"I hate to admit this too, but you're pretty good at what you're doing."

"I am more than just a toy for you to use!" Renjun argues, setting his plate down on the coffee table next to yours. Anger is visibly written all over his face, and you seem to finally get the hint that he's serious about this.

"Alright, then. What do you wanna do instead? Cuddle?!" You suggest, and although it does not seem like this is a legitimate offer, Renjun takes it.

"Yeah, for example!"

And that's how your back ends up pressed to his front as you watch TV, not without a last roll of your eyes, of course, and while Renjun affectionately plays with your hair, he has time to relish in the feeling of being loved for the first time since forever, even if he had to threaten you with deprivation of sex. Later, you even fall asleep in his arms, in his bed, and when he wakes up the next morning, you are snoring soundly besides him.

_____

"Do you want to meet my friends?" Renjun asks casually over the steam evaporating from the hot coffee mugs on the breakfast table. You have half a Baozi in your mouth, and Renjun can only guess your next words as they come out.

"What? Why? Are we getting married?" He assumes you say.

"No, I just thought, you know, since things were getting serious-"

"We are?!" You muffle with wide eyes.

Over the past days that you'd spent at Renjun's place without missing a single day (except for the 4 hours when you went to get your stuff... 4 hours that drove Renjun insane with fear that you wouldn't return), Renjun kind of started to wonder what it is that you're doing for a living that you can just disappear like that without anyone wondering where you are, but he noticed that you do not like to talk much about yourself. All he knows that your interests and taste are, quite frankly, scarily similar to his own. He assumes that you are just careful when it comes to opening up to people, so he is more than thrilled when he finds you next to him every single morning and decides that there will be a time and place for you to bond over deep talk.

"Calm down, I didn't mean it like that. It's just that we've been hanging out a lot and I think it would be... fun?" Renjun suggests carefully. A weight lifts off his heart as your wide eyes shrink back to their normal size and you take your time to chew and swallow before your answer.

"Okay." And then you stuff the other half of the steamed bun into your mouth.

"Great! I'll text them!"

"Today?!"

"We really have to stop talking about this while we eat."

"It's okay, do it whenever, honestly." But only muffled sounds and a few crumbs come out.

"What?"

You roll your eyes dramatically, then point yourself.

"You?"

You nod, then point to Renjun. "Me?"

Then you squiggle your pointer and forefinger in a way that resembles a pair of legs – "go?" – you nod, then point downwards – "here?" – you shake your head – "today?" – you nod frantically and press your pointer finger to your thumb – "okay?"

You finally swallow. "Man, I said it's okay if we go today."

"That was absolutely unnecessary. Now go get ready, I'll text them."

_____

"Where is your other half?"

"Probably inside of someone," Donghyuck says about the lack of Jaemin at the table, but his eyes are intensely focused on you. You on the other hand seem to have found great interest in your fingernails and refuse to take your eyes off of them. "Yo, is she shy or something?"

"I'm not," you say, your eyes snapping up to gaze at Donghyuck who looks a little taken aback. You smile sweetly, then reach over the table to shake his hand. "I'm sorry, I was just a little distracted. Hey, I'm the girl that Renjun fucks."

Renjun chokes on his own spit, and Donghyuck snorts loudly. You lean against the backrest of the McDonald's seat and grab Renjun's hand to hold. Renjun, finally recovered from his near-death-experience, can't believe what's happening as his eyes zone in to where your fingers intertwine with his. It even makes him miss that that was a complete lie since the no-sex-until-i-know-you-won't-leave-thing is still on the table.

"So, how is he? In bed, I mean?" Donghyuck folds his hands beneath his chin and leans forward interestedly.

"Oh, he's great, really! He doesn't look like it, but he has a lot of stamina. And, to be fair, he's not the biggest, but it gets the job done nicely, I especially love it when he-"

"Can we not talk about my dick in a McDonald's?! Please?!"

"Oop, looks like we hit a sore spot-" Donghyuck remarks.

"I am not insecure about- you know what? Fuck you. Go get the food, it's ready," Renjun snaps and pushes the receipt with the pick up number on it into Donghyuck's hand who throws you another knowing look before strolling off to get the food.

"I will not apologize for-"

"You're holding my hand," Renjun states.

"What?" Your eyebrows contort in confusion.

"My hand, you're holding it," Renjun says, lifting both of your hands into your line of sight to prove his point.

"Yeah, so?"

"I like that."

A genuine smile spreads over your face and you bite your lip, maybe to suppress it, but Renjun saw it, and look down at your lap. Donghyuck appears again, tray in hand, and Renjun would've missed your quiet whisper of "he likes that" if his entire world wasn't revolving around you right now.

"What are we talking about?" Donghyuck grins as he slides back onto his seat, immediately pulling a fry out of the box and dunking it in his milkshake. Renjun, still in awe that you're holding his hand, immediately notices how your face contorts in disgust.

"Why the fuck are you doing that?"

"Doing what?"

"Dipping your fry."

Renjun watches with heart-shaped eyes how Donghyuck's mouth opens and closes for a lack of a proper response, because – shit – that is exactly what he's been thinking for the past five years.

"Because I like it?"

"Alright," you shrug, then attend to your cheeseburger. Renjun mirrors your action, lifting the top half of the bun to peel the single slice of pickle off the surface before sticking the burger back together, not noticing how you do the exact same thing until Donghyuck points it out.

"So? That's what it's like when you found a match. Another great advantage is having only one partner whom you engage in sexual activities with. Ah, by the way, how is your itchy sack?"

"Good one, babe," you compliment as Donghyuck's face falls onto his BigMac, and Renjun could not feel any better at that exact moment.

"Sorry I'm late!" The voice of no other than Na Jaemin appears behind Renjun only to reveal said man seconds later as he flops down next to Donghyuck, forcing him to squeeze further against the wall. Donghyuck complains, but no one pays him any mind.

A heavy grin adorns Jaemin's face, an expression Renjun's grown to know like the back of his own hand over the past years. Jaemin's post orgasm glow is so bright and blinding that Renjun's sure he must have just gotten a blowjob in the McDonald's bathroom. His tongue slurps parts of his McFlurry off his spoon. Renjun watches as Jaemin's gaze runs over to you, and as if someone's flipped a switch inside him, Jaemin's smile drops. If the sudden silence wasn't so ear numbing, one would've heard it smash to the ground and shatter into pieces. Even Donghyuck has stopped munching on his food to scan the situation, the end of a fry sticking out from between his lips.

Renjun's heart stops, then starts thumping up his throat as he slowly turns his head towards you, and this exact process repeats itself as he sees how pale you've gotten. Your eyes are trained on Jaemin, and Renjun can see you gulp once before you suddenly get up, the legs of the chair disgustingly scratching over the floor, and leave the fast food restaurant with hurried steps.

Despite desperately wanting to know what the fuck just happened, Renjun hastily gets up to run after you, calling out your name, once, twice, but when he reaches the doors, panting breath creating soft clouds in the cool air, you're out of sight.

_____

Ah, what a great morning. That is what Renjun would have thought if it was opposite day. He is devastated. You are nowhere to be found, the apartment empty since he returned and he still regrets not asking for your number sometime during the past days, though there was no need since you'd spend all your time at his place anyway. But now you're not. You're gone, and Jaemin refuses to let him in on what exactly happened between the two of you that made you leave the place in a hurry, only for Renjun to find Jaemin gone as well as soon as he returned. He only found Donghyuck sitting at the table, dragging his last fry through the milkshake. They finished their meal in silence.

As the doorbell rings, Renjun falls off the couch, scrambles up and runs to answer the door. It's not you, though, it's Donghyuck, who for once decided to be a good friend and check in on Renjun, even though the latter would rather just lie down in a puddle of his own tears, and sob.

"I'm sorry, man," Donghyuck says, dragging Renjun into his arms for comfort. Renjun simply sighs. The warmth of Donghyuck's hug does actually help ease some of the tension in his heart, and when they part, Renjun invites Donghyuck in for some tea.

"Do you know what happened?" Renjun asks as he hands Donghyuck his mug.

"Not a clue. Jaemin hasn't even been home. I have some theories, though." Donghyuck takes a sip and curses after burning his tongue.

"That are?" Renjun is actually relieved to have someone else break their brain over this situation that is not him.

"Number one: Jaemin is her lost brother."

Renjun blinks.

"Number two: Jaemin fucked her mother and destroyed her parent's marriage."

Renjun raises an eyebrow.

"Okay, number three: Jaemin fucked her mother and is her father."

Renjun raises a hand to slap him.

"Okay, okay! Sorry. Number four, and this actually goes two ways. Four point one: They fucked and she is the one girl that broke Jaemin's heart and made him this way."

Renjun does not like the sound of that at all.

"Four point two: They fucked and Jaemin broke her heart and that's why she can't commit."

"I hate all of your theories with my entire being," Renjun admits, "Do you have one that does not mean something bad?"

"Um..." Donghyuck thinks for a while that, admittedly, lasts too long for Renjun to relax, "Jaemin once saved her cat and she never got the chance to thank him because- he fucked her mom- I'M SORRY that's all I can think of."

Renjun sighs. "I don't know. I just wish she would care about me enough to just talk to me, you know?"

"I don't think that's the problem," Donghyuck suggests and Renjun looks away from his steaming mug and at Donghyuck instead. "I think she cares about you a lot, but there seems to be some sort of past trauma that makes it hard for her. I mean, I'm not a specialist since you" – a glaring Donghyuck points an accusing finger at Renjun – "refuse to update me about every little thing like I asked you to, but I don't think this has as much to do with you as you think."

"I've never thought about it that way," Renjun admits, and a little weight drops off his heart at the fact that he is possibly not at fault, and neither are you. "Thank you, Hyuck, honestly."

"No biggie." Donghyuck shrugs with a smug smirk. "You can pay me back in kind."

"What do you mean?"

"A smooch." Donghyuck puckers his lips, but at the same time, the doorbell rings a second time that day, causing Renjun to jump and run towards the obnoxious sound. This time, it really is you.

"Can we talk?" You ask as you stand in his doorway, and Renjun can't do anything but blink in awe because, honestly? He thought he'd never see you again.

"Um, not to be rude, but we're kind of in the middle of something here," Donghyuck says with his lips still puckered for Renjun to kiss. Renjun, without taking his eyes off of you in case you'd vaporize once he looked away for even a split second, ushers Donghyuck to leave since, "he was on his way out, actually."

Not without throwing a little tantrum, Donghyuck lets himself get pushed out of Renjun's apartment. Renjun whispers another 'thank you' and blows him a kiss before closing the door in Donghyuck's face.

_____

"I didn't know you started smoking again," Renjun comments as you sit on his sad excuse of a balcony.

"This is for the vibe," you say, and blow the smoke into the air. "And maybe I had a drink."

"Okay."

Silence.

"This is really scary for me," you admit, and Renjun assumes that you're talking about opening up.

"You can trust me, I'm not going anywhere," Renjun assures, placing a careful arm around your waist and a kiss to your temple.

"Jaemin was my first love."

Renjun gulps. He feels a little part of his heart break off and shatter against his ribcage, leaving a stinging pain behind. Great, so you know Jaemin, and not only that, he happened to be the first one you've ever let into your heart. Renjun assumes that it's been a couple of years since then, but knowing Jaemin, he couldn't possibly be the best first love, or a good one even. Don't get him wrong, he dearly loves Jaemin – in a platonic way – but the way he treats girls is not something he should be as proud of as he is. But maybe he hasn't always been like this. Maybe you were the one to make him like this.

"Go on," Renjun finally coughs out. His hands feel a little shaky, maybe even a little sweaty, and he feels the need to wrap them around the metal railing separating him from free falling to his death.

"It was back in school. I fell for him immediately. He made me feel like the only girl in the world."

Renjun dares to look over at you to watch you sigh, dragging on your cigarette once again. You look incredibly pained, and as much as he wants you to shut up because it seems to be hurting not only him, but you as well, he needs to know.

"Well, that was until he took my virginity. Never saw him again after that until," you pause, clear your throat and take a deep breath and continue pressed with your eyes closed, "until today."

Renjun takes a minute to calm down his mind from running thoughts on overspeed. "I'm- so sorry that happened to you. I wish I could say he's not like that anymore, but... well, his moral compass enhanced a little... um..." Renjun removes his hands from the railing, wiping them on his jeans, then turns to you. "Look, I can see why you wouldn't want to hang out w-"

"No," you interrupt him, dragging on your cigarette once more before carelessly flicking the bud onto the streets below, then you turn to him, take a careful step forward and take his hands into yours. "I trust you. I want you to be the right one. I want you to break this pattern, I want you to change my future."

Renjun does not know how to respond. There's a part of him that wants to pay Jaemin a visit and punch him, but he knows better than to start a physical fight with Na Jaemin, the local gym's best customer. And besides, what would it matter? It's not like violence would change anything. "May I hug you?"

You nod, and Renjun wraps his arms around you to pull you into his chest. His chin rests in the crook of your neck, breathing in the sweet scent of your shampoo, and he is not sure whether it's a good thing that he falls for you more and more every second he spends with you.

_____

Renjun decided that it would be best not to see Jaemin for some time, mostly in favor of his own well being considering that Jaemin would dominate him if it ever came to a physical confrontation. Instead, he focuses his energy on making you feel loved and protected, and makes sure he never gives you the impression of leaving you. He mostly enjoys the quiet nights with you, creating as much physical contact as possible without being uncomfortable, and freely talking into the rise of the sun.

Renjun learned that it's only been you and your mom, most of the time, since your dad cheated on her when you were still a child. Then, as soon as you turned eighteen and got your first real job, your mother left the country. Not without saying goodbye, but apparently, she made it clear that she didn't want to stay in contact. Ever since, it's only been you. You'd always been by yourself, having to care for yourself, working hard to make enough money to be able to afford rent and food. In a way, you had raised yourself to be independent, and your past encounter with Jaemin must have just intensified your bias not to trust men after what your father did to your mother.

Still, that's all Renjun knows about you. And after 3 months of living together, he kind of wishes to know where you live – well, when you're not living with him – what you do for a job, if you have any friends for him to meet, but all he knows is your zodiac sign. Although, he calms himself down by telling himself that you need time to build up trust. After everything that's happened to you, Renjun is the last person wanting to pressure you.

It's only that one particular conversation with his friend Donghyuck he doesn't seem to be able to let go.

"How long have you been living together?" Donghyuck asked as he ripped a small piece off of the bread in his hand to throw it into the pile of ducks gathered in front of them at the pond at the local park. Donghyuck loves to go there to feed the ducks, and Renjun almost found it cute until Donghyuck told him the real reason behind his regular visits to feed the ducks at the pond: picking up girls.

Donghyuck swears that this is the perfect way to get a "chick" (his words, not Renjun's) to fall for you. Either they love this sweet, domestic side of a man who is soft enough to go feed ducks in his spare time which inevitably makes him boyfriend material, or they're there with their kids and- Renjun can't recall how this was different from the first thing. He only remembers thinking that Donghyuck has a weird obsession with older women, and the freudian curiosity in Renjun kind of pushes him to find out more about what that's about. Maybe another time.

"Almost three months," Renjun smiled widely, ready to spill information about all the great memories he had made with you over the past 11 weeks, like when he accidentally sent the pizza delivery guy to the wrong address or when the both of you giggled too loudly at a YouTube video until his downstairs neighbor knocked at his door and begged for you to shut up (admittedly, there's not much going on), but Donghyuck interrupted him with his hand hitting Renjun square in his solar plexus.

"Three months?! Woah, get it champ! How often do you do it?" Donghyuck asked, completely ignoring the way Renjun had to fight not to double over and slide face forward into the pond.

"We-" Renjun coughed and was finally able to stand up straight again. "We actually don't have sex at all."

In hindsight, Renjun's knowledge of physics and anatomy make him doubt the reaction he remembers, but he vividly recalls Donghyuck's eyes to drive out of his skull as he jumped about 3 meters into the air. Summarized: Donghyuck was a little surprised!

"Um, well, I didn't think it would hit you this early, but there are ways, man." Donghyuck patted Renjun's shoulder brotherly. "I still have a few pills at home if you want to try them. I get them from this one guy, and they're worth every penny, let me tell you-"

"I do not suffer from erectile disfunction," Renjun clarified and Donghyuck quickly shut his mouth, blinked a few times, then began to defend himself about how he doesn't need them to get hard, just to stay hard longer or whatever.

"Anyway," Renjun side-eyed Donghyuck as he finally stopped talking, "I just... don't want her to leave me again."

"Ah, that's how the land lies," Donghyuck grinned, "but buddy, it's been months, don't you miss it?"

"Not really," Renjun lied without cause.

"Don't you miss the way it feels?" Donghyuck leaned closer, warm breath tickling Renjun's ear and neck, his voice getting whiney and full of lust as he explained the warm, wet feeling of a-

"Okay, maybe I do!" Renjun said in defeat, holding onto Donghyuck's hands to stop them for making lewd gestures.

"Then there's nothing stopping you. Well, except for the fact that it's very weird how she just lives with you. Doesn't she have a job? Does she pay rent?" Donghyuck frowned at Renjun with raised eyebrows.

Renjun squinted his eyes at him, frowning as well. "Where is this coming from?!"

"I'm just saying, you should ask her about that." Donghyuck shrugged and poured the remaining bread crumbs from his paper bag onto the ground, causing ducks to zoom out of the water and gather around their feet.

"I don't want to pressure her. You know how hard it is for her to open up," Renjun reasoned, but Donghyuck seemed to be having ulterior motives, throwing a wink into the direction of a middle aged woman with a stroller. Renjun watched for a few moments as Donghyuck pressed his tongue into his cheek smugly, then shouted "just gave him some relationship advice while feeding the ducks", and how the woman chuckled and brushed a strand of hair behind her ear, then decided he's seen enough.

Sadly, turning off one's ears had not been invented yet, Renjun thought as he stepped away after patting disinterested Donghyuck's shoulder as goodbye, still hearing Donghyuck ask her about the child's father, how come such a beautiful woman doesn't have a strong man at her side, and what she's going to be doing tonight.

_____

"Baby?" Renjun enters the living room to find you sitting in front of the couch on the carpet, carelessly browsing through a magazine with your playlist randomly playing tunes in the background.

"Hey!" Your eyes light up as you see him. Renjun sits down beside you, a slight smile on his face as he takes in how beautiful you look tonight, just like all nights.

"What are you up to?" He asks, curiously leaning forward to be able to look at the magazine as well.

"It's just a women's magazine, it's like fashion and make-up trends an stuff," you explain briefly still scanning through the pages before your eyes light up once again as you turn to look at Renjun.

"What?" Renjun chuckles nervously, but simultaneously loving the look on your face.

"Could I.. do your make-up?" You ask straightforwardly. Renjun's eyebrows shoot upwards in surprise, mouth shaping an 'o' as he looks up thinking about it briefly. He's never gotten his make-up done before, and although the thought had never occurred to him before, it does sound like a fun couple's activity to do together that could lead to excellent bonding time. Therefore, he smiles and nods at your request.

Renjun coos at how you get up to grab your make-up bag with a slight excited jump in your walk, then watches how you lean down to fish it out of your bag, gulping hard and averting his gaze as you so carelessly present your ass to him. The conversation with Donghyuck still playing in his mind, he realizes that, apart from wanting to know more about you, he really does miss being inside of you physically.

Before he knows it, you're back on the carpet next to him, opening your bag to reveal the endless depths of its contents, various pencils and brushes, tubes and bottles that Renjun knows close to nothing about.

"What do you want me to do?" You ask, and Renjun smiles contently.

"Whatever you want, I'm yours to play with," he confirms before realizing the ambiguous meaning of his words. He still means them, in both ways.

Although, you do not seem to be catching on, shuffling to sit in front of Renjun instead to have a better look at his handsome face. "Your skin is pretty, so let's skip foundation," you decide and Renjun's smile grows at the implied compliment. Instead, you brush his messy bangs out of his face to be able to get a better look at his eyes.

"Can I do your eyeliner?" You ask, gazing deeply into his eyes, and honestly, you could've asked him to jump out of the window and he'd respond with the same breathy 'yes' he did just now. Especially now after you've climbed into his lap for better access.

"Okay," you giggle, now a black pencil in your hand, "look up!"

Renjun does his best to follow your orders, but the eyeliner feels very foreign on his eyes, and as you ask him to look down next, he is met with your cleavage greeting him, and he has to concentrate on not popping a boner instead.

After a while, you lean back, admiring your work as Renjun blinks a few tears away.

"You look pretty," you admit, handing Renjun a little mirror to see for himself. And as he catches his own reflection, he must admit that you're right. He does look pretty, but honestly, he could've looked like trash right now and he'd still do this over and over again just to be close to you.

"Thank you, I agree!" He smiles, handing you the mirror back.

"How about lipstick next?" You suggest and Renjun's eyes immediately dart down to your lips, remembering the last time his own lips touched them for longer than a quick peck, and longing for that feeling. So instead of answering, he nods, trying his best to conceal his nervousness.

A lipstick in hand, you get comfortable on his lap again, seemingly either ignoring or not caring what your shuffling does to him, then attend to his lips. Renjun's now able to watch your face closely as you apply the tinted product onto his lips, falling in love with the way you look when you concentrate on something.

Your gentle fingers tap the lipstick onto his lips, spreading the color gently to create a faded look, but Renjun doesn't really care anymore. His eyes keep focussing on your lips, yearning to taste them again, and he feels like it's showing with the way he keeps leaning in closer.

His heart skips a beat as he looks up into your eyes again to see them already looking into his, and he doesn't even have to say anything before you close the gap in between your mouths and begin kissing him gently, leaving one, two, three kisses on his lips before drawing back to look into his eyes again.

No words are exchanged, it's just him who leans in this time, breathing in deeply through his nose as he wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you closer. He completely loses himself in you and the slow song playing in the background. Your lips feel heavenly, and Renjun admits that it's really been too long since the last time he got to taste them.

Your hands stroke over his body just as his do to yours, gentle moans fall from both of your lips as you carefully grind down against Renjun's prominent bulge. It doesn't take long for him to turn you around, gently laying you on your back to the soft carpet, caging you in with his arms and deeply gazing into your eyes. You strip each other of every piece of clothing, taking your sweet time to show the other how you feel, and as Renjun finally enters you, he feels like this is where he belongs.

_____

"Hyuck, I'm telling you, it was absolutely fantastic," Renjun beams, hands in the air metaphorically mimicking a large object to visualize how much fun he's had with you the night prior.

"I'm guessing the rule of premarital abstinence is off the table?" Donghyuck teases, face mockingly serious, though a brow sneaks its way upwards to hint at his playfulness. Renjun presses his lips together, hands sinking to the table.

"You are just jealous that woman in the park only wanted you to be her new babysitter," Renjun shoots back.

"That's what her mouth said, but do you know what her body said to me about thirty minutes later as I rammed my dick in her?" Donghyuck crosses his arms, pressing his tongue into his cheek smugly, and Renjun just stares blankly ahead, right through Donghyuck's insufferable ego as if it was see-through and not as solid as concrete. Donghyuck leans forwards, forearms holding his weight hovering over the tabletop.

"Ah, fuck, you're so big, Donghyuck. Please, d-don't tell my husband. H-he really can't find out that you're making m-me feel so much better than him, ugh, God, I wish you were the father of my children," Donghyuck moans, high pitched and fake like a porn star, and Renjun snorts, laughter that threatened to come out winning the battle against his muscles, and he's sure he spit on Donghyuck in the process. Payback.

"Sorry," Renjun says and doesn't mean it, "have you talked to your therapist about this 'Mommy'-thing?" Donghyuck sighs and rolls his eyes.

"It's not a 'Mommy'-thing. I don't want them to be my mom, I don't want them to pack me a lunch box and sing me a lullaby," Donghyuck explains.

"Then, what?" The corners of Renjun's mouth twitching downwards, threatening another wave of laughter to burst out with vigor.

"Older ladies know what they want in life. They went through labor and stuff and mostly already found a man, so when they want me, I feel good. Also, they know how to please a guy, you know?" Donghyuck says, and Renjun's eyes are about to pop out from the sole pressure of trying to keep his amusement from spitting Donghyuck in the face again.

"Alright, then, if my love life is so laughable, why don't you give me some insight on how great your girlfriend's cunt squeezes around your dick?" Donghyuck crosses his arms, meaning to sound petty and passive-aggressive, even though Renjun knows that he is eager to hear every little detail.

"Does everything have to be this graphic with you?" Renjun contorts his face in faux disgust, but huffs out a chuckle, not ready to admit that, in all honesty, Donghyuck's words sent him right back to last night when you came around him, milking him for all he's worth.

"It does. Whether you like it or not, this is what you signed up for when you started calling me your friend. Now spill," Donghyuck raises a threatening finger.

"I don't know if I'm comfortable giving out information to fuel your next wanking session with my girlfriend," Renjun notes, but continues to spill the details nonetheless. "So, all in all, very romantic until I was like 5 seconds pre-orgasm and 'Jopping' started playing."

"Did you-"

"I did nut to 'Jopping'."

"I guess you were really jumping and popping," Donghyuck examines, then thinks a little longer, "I guess you were a big boy throwing three stacks."

Renjun looks at him, lips turning into a thin line before he slaps his thighs and gets up. "I think I should go?"

"I guess you really made it bang," Donghyuck says and gets up as well, following Renjun into the hallway with quick footsteps. "I guess you really made the crowd go wild in a small room."

"Stop!" Renjun begs, giggling nevertheless as he slips his jacket on.

"I guess you really got that glow."

"Donghyuck!!" Renjun shrieks, not even fully slipping into his shoes before he grabs his bag and opens the door, Donghyuck behind him clutching his stomach laughing. Though, Renjun gets surprised by someone already standing outside the door, the grin immediately falling off his face as he sees who it is.

"I guess it's in your- " Donghyuck starts, but the second he sees the person in front of the door, his laughter dies down, "... nature."

"Hello, stranger," Renjun says sarcastically, squinting his eyes at Jaemin who simply gulps. It's not like Jaemin to not say anything, or to not smile. Renjun immediately feels a little sorry, but at the same time, he doesn't.

Jaemin simply nods before squeezing in between Renjun and the wooden door frame, kicking his shoes off hastily and hurrying past a flabbergasted Donghyuck towards his room. Renjun's eyes follow him disappear, and when he hears the door to Jaemin's room close shut, he feels reminded of how things really started going downwards as soon as you crossed paths with Jaemin again. Of course it bothers him knowing one of his best bros 1) had his dick in Renjun's girlfriend and 2) broke her heart and scarred her for life. What bothers him almost more is how things went well, they were okay, but now Jaemin needed to show up again and make Renjun question everything he's built with you.

What if Donghyuck is right? What if it really is weird that you keep staying at his place? Why is there never a place you have to be? Admittedly, Renjun had pushed this uncomfortable feeling of something being off with your stay to the very back of his brain, not wanting to destroy what you have, not wanting to waste his last chance for love because of something as insignificant as 'oh no, my girlfriend won't leave and I also don't want her to', but suppressing worries is never the answer. No matter how far you push them away, they always resurface to bite you in the butt. And sometimes they bite you in the butt in human form with a perfect, pearly-white set of teeth and eyes that seem alarmingly less sparkly than usual.

Renjun decides that he has to get a grip. He's been so blinded by love, or whatever it is right now that's surely developing into love, that he just let you step into his life, ruin one of his dearest friendships and keep eating the contents of his fridge when he's not home. All this, he tells himself on the way home, passing by a group of guys hanging out in the park together drinking. He sighs. Wasn't it always bros before hoes? Pals before gals? Homies before blow-me's? Does that still apply when the homie is in the wrong?

_____

"Darling?" Renjun whispers as he enters your (at this point) shared home. The lights are turned off, your figure nowhere to be found. Renjun sighs, slowly unties his shoe laces, takes his sneakers off and places them by the door carefully. He realizes most of his shoes are carelessly thrown all over the place, and so are yours. After the sixth pair he's carefully put into storage, he realizes what he's doing.

"You stupid gremlin, just ask her. Stop wasting time," Renjun tells himself, finally taking off his jacket and hanging it up.

"Ask me what?"

Renjun swears his soul leaves his body for a good 10 seconds before he can breathe again. Your silhouette stands in the doorway to his bedroom, the light of the lampposts outside shining on your backside, hugging your curves and making you look like an angel. Renjun curses his artistic eye in moments like these.

"You scared the crap out of me," he giggles, a little intimidated and, truthfully, freaked out at the way you just stand there, seemingly faceless because of the darkness.

"Aww, I'm sorry," you say, and approach him, hugging his cool figure into your arms. Hesitantly, Renjun hugs you back. Something inside him tells him that you're hiding something. "Where were you so long?"

Renjun breathes in slowly, then out through his nose. "Just walking around, needed to think." He's telling the truth.

"Are you okay?" You pull back, looking at his face gently illuminated by the moon. Very lightly, Renjun can make out the lines of worry on your face. He lets out a shaky breath.

"We need to talk."

Another layer of clothing lighter, Renjun sits down on the bed next to you, sweatpants and a white shirt replacing his earlier clothes that kept him from freezing in the cool weather of an early October. The expression on your face is unreadable, though you look not happy, but rather full of worry, sadness and a pinch of anger.

"Okay, this... this is not an easy thing to ask," Renjun finally starts, hating the tension that's so thick one could cut it with a knife.

"Please, um-" you stop him before anymore words can leave his mouth, glossed over eyes finding his gaze and the sight makes Renjun's heart ache. Never have you looked so raw, so fragile, so... broken? "Let me say something first, okay?"

Renjun nods, sucking his lower lip into his mouth to chew on it. His heart beats fast, the sight of you in front of him almost making him forget why he marched through the streets of this town for hours with no physical goal, but only to make sense of the mess clouding his brain.

"I don't know... what exactly you're going to ask me, but-" you halt and stare downwards into your lap where your shaky hands are nervously fumbling with each other. "Whatever it is, whether you want to break up with me, I just want you to know that-" you gulp, voice shaky, "that I've never felt loved in my life except for when I was with you. You really showed me what love is, Jun. You made me love you. So, um..." you breathe out shakily, two tears rolling down and falling towards your hands as they reach the apples of your cheeks. "Thank you for your time and efforts. You really are the best person I've ever met."

_____

"You are fucking weak!" Donghyuck scolds, a little less playfully than usual.

"You don't get it, Hyuck. You weren't there. The sight would even have broken your sad excuse of a heart," Renjun defends himself.

"Excuse me? Just because my heart has Milf-shaped holes in it doesn't mean I don't feel empathy!" Donghyuck throws in, crossing his arms in front of his chest. Renjun feels a little less confident in his decision of letting you be than a few minutes ago. "What did you ask instead?"

Renjun bites his tongue. Admittedly, a day later, the decision doesn't seem as logical as it did hidden under the secure blankets of a dark night. "I asked if she wanted to meet my parents?"

Donghyuck laughs out, once, and very loud, then turns his body to Renjun and places his hands on the older's thighs. "And let me guess." He raises his eyebrows in amusement. Renjun is not amused. "She was like: 'oh my God, Junnie! Why didn't you just say that?' And playfully slapped your arm, and you somehow ended up with your dick so deep in her you could feel hear stomach acid."

"Ew, what the fuck?" Renjun's eyes widen, eyebrows furrowing, his mouth agape in horror. "Y-you know that's not how the female body works, right?"

"How would I know?" Donghyuck retorts, shrugging.

Renjun groans in frustration, hiding his face in his hands. Donghyuck is right. He shouldn't have let you off the hook so easily. He has the right to know! He deserves to have all the answers to his questions. He is honestly one incident away from making an AITA post on Reddit.

"Hey, hey," Donghyuck gently removes Renjun's hands from his face, letting his hands linger on the older's wrists, "don't beat yourself up, Jun. It's not your fault. If the pussy is tight, the pussy is tight, and there is nothing we can do about it. She's in your head, while you should be in her head – literally."

Renjun rolls his eyes.

"No, for real, though." Donghyuck softly slaps the back of Renjun's birthmarked hand. "Women have a different kind of power over us mortals." He looks deeply into Renjun's eyes. "You really like her, don't you?"

Renjun nods. "I might even use the other L-word."

"Okay, here's the thing," Donghyuck announces, now taking both of Renjun's hands in his, cheesily interlocking their fingers which Renjun chooses to ignore, "meeting your parents is great. I mean, inevitably, they're gonna ask her about her job, won't they?"

A spark of hopeful light appears in Renjun's eyes. "You're right. Thank you, Hyuck."

"Kiss me, then," Donghyuck says and winks. Renjun forcefully pulls his hands from Donghyuck's grip. "In your dreams."

"You don't wanna know what happens in my dreams, my dear Renjun," Donghyuck smirks and Renjun decides that this conversation has to end here.

"How are things with Jaemin?" He therefore asks, leaning back in his chair to create a bigger distance between him and the lecher.

"He's in and out, mostly when he knows I'm not around. I think I'm going to trap him later today when he comes home, and make him tell me what the fuck his problem is," Donghyuck explains matter-of-factly. Renjun admires Donghyuck for his confrontation abilities. Of course, Donghyuck is not as in the middle of all this as Renjun, but he himself would've dreaded running into Jaemin randomly in the hallway, would probably put a tracking device on Jaemin so he can properly avoid him, and – Heaven forbid – would not try to corner him and make him spill. Renjun really hates confrontation, he always has when it comes to people he's close with, that he likes, or rather: that he's afraid of losing, and this is probably one of the reasons why he finds it abnormally hard to tickle the kind of information out of you that he needs to sleep peacefully at night.

Either way, Donghyuck will get Jaemin, and his parents will get you, and Renjun gets all the information he needs without having to put in even an ounce of effort. Slowly, Renjun realizes that this is not that great of a foundation for a good relationship, platonically or romantically. Yeah, admittedly, he feels a bit like a wimp.

_____

Renjun's heart beats up his throat for no apparent reason, except for the fact that he's currently standing in front of his parents' house, having just pressed his finger into the button for the doorbell seconds prior. On his other hand: you, dressed up nicely as if you're trying to impress his parents, inevitably leading to a new hatch of butterflies dancing around in Renjun's stomach. He also quite enjoys the way your palm is a bit sweaty as you cling to his hand, proving that you're nervous, which means that you care. Renjun really likes imagining that you care.

"Son!" Renjun's father opens the door and pulls him into a strong, manly hug, his dad's large palm coming down on his back to knock the air out of him. Seconds later, the hug is over, and Renjun's father examines you.

You smile sweetly, holding his hand out for him to shake. Renjun's dad raises his eyebrows, grins, then shakes your hand aggressively. "Son, I gotta say-"

"Please refrain," Renjun pleads, and pulls you into the house. You both take your shoes off and enter the living room containing Renjun's mom who quickly fluffs out the pillows, then turns to you.

"It's great to meet you," she says, shakes your hand and throws Renjun a wink. Renjun cringes. He really loves his parents – well, his mom first and foremost, but yeah – but they have a disgruntling tendency to embarrass him. His mother, the social butterfly she is, immediately picks up a conversation with you and, to Renjun's upmost joy, you seem thrilled about it, your eyes sparkling as you talk to his mother. It's good, don't get him wrong, but beyond the surface, it's bad. There is a reason Renjun brought you here, well, not that it's the sole reason, but Renjun still needs to find out what it is that you do for a living, and when he gets blinded by this mind-numbing feeling of being absolutely in love with the way you get along with his mother, the dearest woman in his life, he will forget about it.

Hence, he excuses himself to see his father in the kitchen, preparing the food. Not that any of you or his mother would even notice his absence as Renjun's mom is already on her way to the shelf in the corner to pull out photo albums containing Renjun's best and worst memories growing up. But even as he stands in the kitchen, his gaze darts over through the open door to investigate your figure hunched over the printed stages of Renjun's puberty, giggling wholeheartedly over his mother's remarks about all of his friends in the past. His mother has always been good with names and faces.

Even later at the dinner table, Renjun is not able to concentrate one his father's cooking, or the light conversation taking place over the amount of food on the table that could feed an entire baseball team for three weeks. There is only one single thing on Renjun's mind: what is it that you are hiding?

Thankfully – might it be the telekinetic bond he has with his mother or just simple human interest – Renjun's mom, after a minute of silent munching, pipes up and throws the question into the room.

"Our Renjun worked hard to be a freelancer," she chuckles and briefly touches Renjun's forearm resting beside his plate, causing Renjun's ears to pipe up and his eyes to widen. "What is it that you do for a living?"

Renjun feels as if time stops, presumably because it does take you a little while to answer. You visibly gulp at the question, eyes avoiding every person at the table. "Well," you begin, then look up at everyone. You blink a few times and wet your lips before continuing. "I recently lost my job and am looking for something else at the moment." Your gaze catches Renjun's who can't hide his surprise. "Which is why I am extremely grateful for Renjun being there for me right now."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that," Renjun's mom comforts, a sad look on her face.

"It's okay. I mean- the firm had to ax jobs because of insolvency, so there wasn't really anything I could do about it." You nod to yourself. The following awkwardness lies heavily in the air, and before Renjun's father can even think about bringing alcohol to the table, his mother pipes up once again.

"Don't worry about it, dear. You are still young, there will be lots of job opportunities in the future, I'm sure of it," she smiles encouragingly and you manage to send a slight smile back. "Which reminds me!"

This time, Renjun's mom playfully pinches her husband's shoulder who dramatically mewls at the action. "We were just your age when we met!"

"Oh, really?" You smile widely, interested in the story Renjun's mom tells next, going into almost every detail regarding their first encounter. Renjun, having listened to this exact story countless times, relaxes in his seat. He feels a bit bad that he basically forced you to reveal this probably embarrassing detail about yourself in front of his parents the first time you meet them, but a much bigger part of him is just relieved since, basically, this explains it all. Maybe he should feel a bit used, a bit hurt that you didn't trust him enough to share this detail of your life with him, but on the other hand: he is just glad you're not secretly a serial killer or do porn. Not that there's anything wrong with that, he'd just like to know.

In the midst of his mom's speech, he catches your eyes and sends you a gentle smile which you reciprocate. His hand gently squeezes your thigh under the table, and he is pleasantly surprised as your hand finds his, casually interlocking your fingers with his and putting them on display on the table top.

"Well, good thing you met him before the year ended," Renjun's mother finishes. Renjun's eyes almost pop out of their sockets. Why would she bring that up?

"Why? What's happening at the end of the year?" You ask curiously.

"Christmas!" Renjun says, a bit too loud maybe, since all eyes are on him all of a sudden. "You know, cuffin' season. Heh..."

The day ends pleasantly. Renjun has to fight both of his parents off as they try to make you stay over night or "at least for another shot". Oh no, he has to get you home and, to be completely honest, right into his bed, or preferably the closest surface to the front door that you're willing to take him on. Not even the little remark his mother had whispered to him as he was waiting by the door for you to finish up in the bathroom can make him want you any less right now: "I'm so sure I know her from somewhere."

_____

Days pass and Renjun is on cloud nine. Things are going absolutely great with you, you do fun stuff together, and Renjun can have his little daddy moments every once in a while when you ask him to help you with your job search. He feels giddy all over when he goes to bed, and possibly even giddier when he wakes up to you soundly snoring in his arms. Life is perfect.

But Renjun wouldn't be Renjun if he didn't worry about something, and this time it is the last obstacle to overcome for this to be the absolute perfect relationship: you have to vibe with his friends. Well, first of all, he himself has to start vibing with all of his friends again. He has not seen or heard of Jaemin since he met him that day, and Donghyuck had either forgotten to corner the younger male, or forgotten to tell Renjun about it (classic Donghyuck).

Hence, Renjun calls Donghyuck (so he can't forget to respond to his messages) and makes a plan to meet. Said meeting actually occurs on the same day since Donghyuck feared Jaemin would flee the country if they didn't hurry.

About an hour later – and don't ask him how he convinced you to do this (he might have been using the short post-orgasm timeframe to suggest it when your mind was still cloudy and you were grinning like you were out of your mind) – you appear in front of Donghyuck and Jaemin's apartment.

Before Renjun can even reach out to ring the doorbell, Donghyuck rips open the door, shushes the both of you and hurries you inside. Shoes off, you all meet at the stinky kitchen table and Renjun is reminded of his first encounter with you that he had spilled about at this very table. He finds it a funny little memory.

"Jaemin is in his room," Donghyuck whispers and Renjun can smell the garlic fried chicken he must have had earlier in his breath.

"You didn't tell him we were coming?" Renjun whisper-shouts back and purposely avoids looking at you because he already knows of the disapproving stare the back of his head is receiving right now.

"One: he just had a girl over, and even though I seem like the type to barge into a room that reeks of sex to witness Jaemin balls deep in a chick, I've seen enough of that. Two: if I had told him, he would've possibly taken off no questions asked," Donghyuck reasons and Renjun has to, once again, question why Donghyuck always has to verbally visualize all the tmi details of his speech. Renjun turns to look at you, and you look unsure. Although you had voiced your concerns on the way here, and Renjun had to make you promise not to bail on him, he gets where you're coming from.

Taking you aside (turning around since Donghyuck is openly swiping on his tinder right now that Renjun knows he hasn't set an age limit to) he asks, "Are you okay with this?"

You take a deep breath before nodding. "I want to do this for you, Jun."

Renjun has to ask himself when he started to connect the feeling of love with the desire for sex because why is the first though that comes to mind to bend you over the sticky counter and have his balls slap against your thighs? On that note, he also should stop hanging out with Donghyuck so much if this is how his mind describes sex...

Instead, he presses a kiss to your lips, and apparently Donghyuck's forgotten about his rule of being quiet because he 'ooohh's and laughs dirtily. Renjun simply pays him no mind, unlike you who raises a questioning eyebrow.

"I say I go in first, prepare him for what's to come, and then get him out here so we can all talk," Renjun suggests and everyone nods in agreement. "And Donghyuck-"

"Hm?"

"Leave my girlfriend alone while I'm gone." Renjun squints at Donghyuck.

"I'll try my best." Donghyuck winks at him before brushing his tongue over his front teeth and then biting the air in your direction. Renjun cringes.

"I can defend myself, don't you worry," you confirm with a smile and Renjun wants to kiss the floor you're walking on. Well, maybe not this floor since he is sure that ketchup stain by the fridge has been there since they moved in and got McDonald's on the first night.

"Oh, you know martial arts?" Donghyuck questions with raised eyebrows and great interest.

"No, but I can aim for your balls!" You explain, nodding excitedly.

"Be careful, he might enjoy that," Renjun comments before leaving towards Jaemin's room. He can hear Donghyuck silently arguing his statement in the background before promising you that he would not enjoy that, even though everyone present knows that's a lie. Renjun giggles one last time before turning the corner and stepping into the narrow hallway leading to Donghyuck's and Jaemin's bedrooms while wishing they would open a window every once in a while.

The few steps to Jaemin's door seem endless, especially as Renjun walks past Donghyuck's room that he had forgotten to close the door to, greeting Renjun with the pleasant sight of a fleshlight. Renjun whines quietly, but realizes nonetheless that he is happy to be Donghyuck's friend. He might be disgusting, but it's actually kind of funny.

So, without proper preparation of what to say, Renjun arrives at Jaemin's door. His hand hesitates in front of the "alpha male", "gym bro" and "Fortnite" stickers on Jaemin's door before he actually manages to knock.

The second Jaemin takes to offer him to enter stretches like gum.

"Did you forget something, bunny?" Jaemin asks as soon as the door opens. Renjun is greeted with the sight of Jaemin's massive back facing him as he sits at his desk, an online poker game decorating the large screen in front of him.

Given the nickname, Renjun doubts that Jaemin has any clue that it's him in his room right now. He tries to think of a cocky answer, but he has never been the spontaneous type, so all that comes out is "call me bunny one more time and i might kiss you" and Renjun has no idea where that came from. Still, it does the job of making Jaemin spin around in his chair, eyes wide in shock as he sees Renjun (and not bunny) stand in the doorway.

It's been a while since Renjun's seen Jaemin, and that might be one of the reasons why he finds himself staring at the younger's chest muscles for a bit too long for it to be a coincidence.

Once he's managed to peel his eyes off of Jaemin's nude upper body (he is glad he's wearing boxer shorts, at least) he aims to say something again since Jaemin's sure taking a long time to respond.

"Good day, sir," Renjun says and frowns at how awkward he is. Finally, a chuckle escapes Jaemin. Renjun also isn't sure why he's being so nice to Jaemin. Last time he checked, he was furious and wanted Jaemin to suffer a pussy-less summer. Maybe it's because everything else is perfect right now, and he doesn't have it in him to feel angry anymore.

"Hello, Jun," Jaemin finally says before getting up and wrapping his meaty arms around Renjun who experiences a weird mixture of relief, a spark of arousal, and the feeling of being crushed to death, so he just gently pads Jaemin's body in return. When Jaemin finally lets go of him, holding him by his shoulders and gently shaking him, Renjun reminds himself of all the disgusting things in this room alone so he can stop finding his best friend hot (namely: the dead cactus by the dirty window, the trash can that's spilling over with used tissues and condom wrappers, the countless empty bottles scattered around the place, most of which still containing an unnaturally colored fluid and some of which sporting little white clumps, the pin-up-girl-posters, the old gym socks all over the floor that he can smell from here, and the thick layer of dust on- basically everything Jaemin doesn't touch every day). It helps.

Jaemin steps back, opens a window and lights a cigarette.

"So, uh," Renjun starts, "don't freak out."

Jaemin nods and smiles.

"But I'm here with," Renjun halts to force down a smile and fail, "with my girlfriend. And don't feel pressured right now! It's all good. But we.. we came to talk things out."

Jaemin is not smiling anymore, but nods nonetheless. Renjun feels a bit bad, a bit selfish, even.

"Would you, uh-" Renjun scratches the back of his head before stepping towards the window as well because the distance is making him feel a lot more awkward "Would you mind telling me what happened? Back then?"

"She didn't tell you?" Jaemin questions, and Renjun is trying his best to decipher how Jaemin is feeling right now. Is he upset? Does he care?

"She did, but... I wanted to hear your side of the story. You're my best friend, after all," Renjun admits, eyes wandering around the room awkwardly before looking at Jaemin again. He is a bit glad his fingers find an old gum wrapper on the window sill to fiddle with. "I know it probably didn't feel like that for you in the past weeks. I'm sorry. It should've been bros before hoes but-"

"I know, you're a hopeless romantic, Jun," Jaemin reasons, "no need to apologize. I guess I just didn't like getting confronted with my ugly past."

"I get that," Renjun says and smiles slightly. Next thing he knows, Jaemin's pressing a kiss to his forehead. Renjun turns beet red within seconds. "Stop it, idiot, I have a girlfriend."

Jaemin laughs loudly. "What, am I your gay awakening?"

"You know very well who my gay awakening was." Renjun thinks back to his high school days, especially that one kid, tall, handsome, loud and a little stupid. Oh, meow, his first love.

Jaemin ruffles his hair. "So, my side of the story, huh?" He leans on his forearms and looks out the window, blowing the smoke into the cold air. Renjun, already shivering a little, wonders how Jaemin's not dying from the cold right now. "There is not much to it, really. I was a horny teenager, she was a pretty girl. It was not cool of me to just – y'know – hit and run. I have learned since then. Girls know what they get themselves into when they hop into my bed, I make it very clear."

"Very noble of you," Renjun says, and he hopes it doesn't sound sarcastic to Jaemin's ears. This might not be Renjun's preferred lifestyle, but to each their own, who is he to judge? "I'm just hoping this won't stand between us."

"Oh, don't worry. I won't fuck your girlfriend again," Jaemin promises, snapping the bud of the cigarette out the window.

"Not what I meant-" Renjun says, but is honestly a bit relieved to hear that. Well, he's pretty sure you wouldn't cheat on him, and he knows that Jaemin has about 200 other options just off the top of his head, but it still feels nice to be reassured. "So, are we good?"

"We are so good," Jaemin announces with a grin, pulling Renjun into another rib-cracking hug. This time, Renjun actually manages to hug him back. He loves Jaemin dearly (platonically), even though he's a real pig at times. Renjun daydreams a bit more about how much he loves his friends before Jaemin detaches himself from Renjun to announce that they should probably head out so he can apologize to the real victim of all of this. Renjun swears he's going to twist Jaemin's nipples until they fall off if he goes out there to meet you without putting a shirt on first. Jaemin laughs, slaps Renjun's back so hard the air gets knocked out of his lungs, then complies and slips into the next best sweater.

Renjun sighs as he realizes the writings on it. Better than nothing, he guesses.

He isn't really surprised as they enter the kitchen to find Donghyuck flexing his very little gain of biceps in front of you and you booing at him with your thumb pointing downwards. Once you notice Jaemin, Renjun notices how you tense up a bit, and he immediately comes rushing to your side to feel you slightly relax with his arm around your shoulder.

"Long time no see-" Donghyuck squints at the lettering on Jaemin's sweater, "orgasm donor."

"Might have not seen you, but I definitely smelled those stinkers you leave in the bathroom for me to find," Jaemin responds. Renjun is a bit surprised to find that this whole situation must have affected Jaemin enough to not even interact with his platonic soulmate in the slightest.

"You make it sound like I don't flush," Donghyuck mumbles, but it goes unnoticed since Jaemin has now turned to you.

"I want to apologize, which I should've done way sooner," Jaemin starts, and the tension in the air is scaring Renjun a bit. "I was young and a total dick, but that's no excuse. I'm sorry."

No one says anything, not even Donghyuck, who has an opinion or at least a thought on everything. It is quiet for a good while, and Renjun fears that you are not ready to forgive Jaemin, which, in all honesty, is fair, given you've lived with the trauma he gave you for years now. Renjun has tried fairly often since he found out what you went through, but he can't imagine how he would've reacted (and lived on) if his first love (who took his v-card) just left without saying anything. (He had to move to fulfill his dream of becoming an idol a year later, sadly, but they're still in touch, on and off. This also makes his encounter with you on the living room floor the other night a bit ironic, but that is besides the point right now.)

Finally, you breathe in. The anxiety in Jaemin's eyes tightens. Everyone is holding their breath.

"I forgive you." You reach out and shake Jaemin's hand. Hell breaks loose in Renjun's chest because, wow, what did he do in his past life to deserve such luck. He is so happy, he smooches your cheek. You giggle, Jaemin smiles and Donghyuck hollers in the background. This little party goes on for a moment before the atmosphere relaxes again. Donghyuck pipes up again to fill the silent moment with an unnecessary comment, "is it just me or does this situation call for a gang bang?"

"Donghyuck, I swear to God, I am going to stuff you head first into Jaemin's nut-napkin-trash can and send a picture of it to your mom," Renjun hisses, but Donghyuck seems unfazed.

"Nothing she hasn't seen before." He shrugs. Renjun decides not to question it.

_____

Renjun's life is so wonderful, he wishes someone would write a story about it. With him by your side, you actually managed to get a job which occupies you half of every other day. Although, you still live with Renjun, which he doesn't mind at all. He loves having you come home to a freshly cooked dinner, to then snuggle on the couch until you either fall asleep or start diddling.

Renjun likes when it's the second option, just like tonight, where he's seated on the floor in front of the couch with your legs draped over his shoulders as he eats you out slowly and softly. Your gentle gasps are music to his ears, the prime time movie playing in the background long forgotten and tuned out as his attention is fully on you.

The slight tugs on his hair make his stomach churn with desire, hands and mouth suddenly too eager to keep his teasing manner up as he moves up to kiss you instead. You giggle into the kiss at his fiery passion, suggesting to take things to the bedroom instead.

Renjun does not need to be told twice as he pulls you against him, making you chuckle even more, and moves you to the bedroom.

Your back hits the mattress with a soft thud as you smile excitedly at Renjun who comes climbing over your body to be at eye level with you again. His hands find your hips, caressing their way upwards while pushing the silky fabric of your shirt up in the process, allowing your braless chest to meet his hungry eyes. The rest of your clothing follows suit, Renjun feeling the flame of lust relight once again as his bare skin touches yours.

"Can we try something tonight?" You suddenly whisper, gaze trained on Renjun's face waiting impatiently for his answer. With his mouth slightly agape, he nods. His eyes jump to where your hand is suddenly touching his, following as you move it upwards to your neck, gently wrapping his smooth fingers around it and applying pressure.

Renjun gulps in awe.

"Press here when you push in," you say, eyelids fluttering as you mimic the action with your fingers against his. Renjun nods carefully, pupils blown probably as wide as yours with lust and desire, heart pounding in his chest as if it was the first time all over again. He will always feel like this around you.

Finding your entrance, Renjun coats his tip with your essence, teasing your awaiting body for another moment or so until his tip catches at your hole. He remembers your words, the grip of his fingers tightening around your throat as he slowly pushes forward, length sinking in slowly.

He's not even all the way in and he can already feel you clench around him, walls hugging him as if they're afraid of letting him go, hole almost fluttering at the feeling of being choked. All that paired with how heavenly you look wrapped up in ecstasy, pretty moans flowing freely only impacted by the way Renjun restricts the flow of air into your lungs and of blood into your brain.

Renjun loves you. He is so deeply in love with you he feels like he could laugh and cry simultaneously, stomach tickling with the all too familiar butterflies every time you look at him. He can't ever get enough of you, he needs you close to him. Never is he going to let you go. He will fight for you, whatever that might mean.

"I'm so in love with you," Renjun can't hold back saying, gently gaze caressing you lovingly. The slow pace he sets makes both of you see stars, length dragging along your walls perfectly to bring you to your shared high.

And it's probably this what makes it sting 100 times more the next morning. You were up early to go to work, kissing Renjun's forehead goodbye as he was still idling sleepily in bed. His mind is still groggy when he peels himself off the sheets and picks up his phone for the first time that day, weak hands struggling to remove the charger. Although, all sleepiness is wiped from his body the second he looks at the screen.

The pretty lock screen picture he has showing you during golden hour is hidden behind a bunch of messages that came in over night. But Renjun is not interested in the four messages he had gotten from Donghyuck ("TW: dickpic", a photo, "can i send it like this or does the slit look off to you??" and "or is it just me?????") or the Instagram reel Jaemin sent to the group chat with the message "me when i was in renjun's gf ha haaa" and Donghyuck responding with "clean".

What makes Renjun's heart drop, beat 20 times its usual speed and then drop again is the following E-Mail notification:

Dear Renjun Huang,

we feel the need to inform you that during our yearly check-ups, we noticed that there has been an incident with your account. Unfortunately, it seems like there has been a mistake made on the company's side regarding your profile.

It seems that someone has hacked into our system, gotten to your private information and pretended to be your Soulmatch™.

We dearly apologize for this mistake. To protect your safety, we have now deleted your account and all private information regarding your person. Please get in touch with us if you want to press charges against the intruder.

Of course, we will pay back the amount you have spent on our Premium Love Package immediately.

Again, our deepest apologies.

Sincerely,

The Soulmatch™ Team

Renjun is not sure how to react to this. Immediately, he checks the app, but he is logged out already. He tries to log in, but his profile is nowhere to be found.

Putting his phone down, he falls onto his back. His mind is racing with thoughts, but they do not seem to make any sense. Someone pretended to be his soulmate? He has never gotten any matches except-

Except you.

Was this... all a hoax? Were you not his soulmate? Have you been lying to him all this time? Why? What does this even mean? How did you do it? And most importantly, what is he going to do now?

Before he knows it, tears start pooling in his eyes, and soon after they drip hotly down his cheeks.

You lied to him.

Have you just used him all this time? Is everything a lie? Do you even love him back? Where did the lies begin? Does he even know who you are? Is this why you've been so secretive about every single detail of your life? Because everything is just made up?

And he just let you. He put up with all of it because he is a pathetic romantic who believes in soulmates. Because he is so desperate to find love. You lied to him with every fibre of your being. And he kissed you. He made love to you. He held you and comforted you. Hell, he even let down his best friend because of you. How could he have been so stupid?

Renjun simply has no words. And he doesn't think he has anything to say to you ever again. He just wants to know why, and how, but he doesn't want to ask you because you're going to lie your way out of it anyway, no?

Shaky legs allow him to get up and walk over into the living room where all your stuff is scattered around.

He is so stupid. He let you live with him. He trusted you without question.

And you used him.

He never wants to see you or any of your stuff ever again, he decides as he kicks against your backpack leaned against the couch, wincing in pain immediately as the contents of the backpack appear to be much more solid than he presumed. His hands grab ahold of his injured foot, causing him to pathetically jump around on one leg until he gives up and falls onto the couch. Wow, he can't even have his dramatic meltdown without being an embarrassing idiot.

The next few hours he spends mostly crying or angrily pacing around. He's thrown all your stuff into a corner and covered it with a blanket so he doesn't need to get reminded of how he's just a pathetic loser every few minutes, although it doesn't help.

He is not sure whether to be upset about the fact that you can't use your phone at work or not, he only knows that by the time 2pm comes around (the time you get off work) he starts to panic.

He is not going to face you. Not now, not like this, preferably not ever. He debates if he should call you, but knowing how easily influenced he is, he'd probably let you lull him in again. No way is he going to face you, nor your voice, nor your texts. All that's left to notify you that Renjun wants you out of his life immediately is a handwritten note to leave while he goes and takes a walk, and hopefully by the time he comes back, you and all your stuff are gone.

Unfortunately, before he can even get a pen and a piece of paper, he hears the keys jiggling as the door is being unlocked. Renjun briefly debates whether jumping out the window would hurt less than this encounter.

"Honey I'm h-" your face comes into view, and Renjun feels his heart beat up his throat. He feels so uncomfortable, so bad, so stupid, so pathetic. "What's wrong?"

Okay, great. It seems to be written all over his face how his morning went.

"Don't you have anything to say to me?" Is all he gets out, cringing at how shaky his voice is, how weak and cracked it sounds after he's dramatically sobbed for a good half of his morning.

"What do you mean?" Your brows contort, and Renjun is glad that he for once does not feel any sexual attraction to you while you're fighting. This was too much.

"Maybe how you lied to me about every single aspect of your life?"

"Huh??"

Renjun wipes his face with one hand. "Didn't know you could hack."

The utter confusion on your face turns into an expression of shock, fear even. "Oh God, oh God."

"That's right, now you remember," Renjun says passive aggressively.

"I think I'm gonna throw up," you say, not meeting Renjun's eyes as you hold your stomach.

"Listen. I'm not going to scream at you. I just want you out. Out of here and out of my life," Renjun says and is surprised at how calm he appears.

"No, no, no, please. I can explain-"

"You can explain all you want, how can I ever believe something you say ever again after all you did was lie? Do you even love me?" Renjun raises his voice against his own better judgement, tears appearing in his eyes once again, but he doesn't let them spill out. He can't give you that kind of satisfaction.

By now, you're kneeling on the floor. The one and a half meters separating you from him feel endless, you're crying restlessly and Renjun doesn't even feel a pinch of empathy for you.

"I do! I love you, please, Renjun, please, you're all I have," you beg.

At this, Renjun feels his heart shatter a little more. Maybe he does have a bit of empathy for you. At the same time, a new wave of anger arises.

"I trusted you. I gave you everything. And you just- you lied. All you did was lie!"

"That's not true! I-" you suddenly crawl over to him and Renjun takes a step back. "I promise. I love you. Maybe the beginning was- fucked up, but everything after that was sincere! I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, please!"

At this point, the gates of pride can no longer contain Renjun's tears and he breaks down as well, his knees hit the floor in front of you and he begins sobbing. "How could you do this to me?"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," is all you reply, hands reaching out to touch him, and he flinches back, but somehow still lets it happen, lets your arms wrap around him and burry your face in the crook of his neck as you pathetically whimper into the fabric of his shirt.

Renjun follows suit. Of course, he hates you right now, but a very big part of him is in love with you – or rather with the version of you that you made up (???). Not listening to the part of his consciousness screaming at him to stop, he wraps his arms around you as well, crying wholeheartedly against your shaking body.

He has no idea how long you sit there, his legs have gone numb at this point, everything hurts, and then you finally speak up.

"I can explain. It's not good, it's not nice, it's no excuse, but I at least want you to know the truth and not whatever truth you've made up in your head."

Renjun nods. He shouldn't, but he wants you to tell him what really happened.

He also hates that you know him so well.

You somehow find yourselves on the living room floor a few minutes later. Renjun's brought two bottles of water to hydrate after that crying fest out there.

"So, the app," you start, not meeting Renjun's eyes in the slightest. "I used to- work for them."

You take some time to let that sink in. Renjun decides he does not want to respond until the end.

"There was a huge data leakage, and I thought I had it under control, but turns out I didn't, which is why I had to meet you to get you to delete your profile- it's complicated. Or maybe I just made it complicated. But that is why.. you got that weird match. Usually, you can visit that person's profile, but obviously I couldn't have you see it was me because of- our previous encounter, which by the way wasn't planned! It was really just a coincidence!"

Renjun is unsure how this is making him feel.

"Anyway, so I came over. You went to the bathroom and I deleted the app of your phone. Silly me apparently forgot that i had to delete the profile, which is why I came back. I didn't plan for us to hook up again- or whatever. I just needed enough time to delete your profile, which I fucked up. This is already bad enough, but it gets worse."

Renjun does not like where this is going.

"Obviously, I got fired. And you know my situation by now, this was literally all I had. With what I had saved, it lasted me about half a year until I had no money left, I had no idea what to do. I applied for jobs everywhere, but no one was willing to hire me after finding out why I got fired last time. This is where it gets really fucked up. I'm sorry."

Your nervous fiddling makes Renjun believe you, even though he is not sure if he should.

"I- thought that... oh, God, this is so bad."

"Just say it," Renjun says and is not really surprised by how dead inside he sounds.

"Well, I thought that maybe if I like had sex with you again, you'd let me stay with you? I really don't know what the plan was, but... literally you're the only person I knew and... I don't know, I just thought- I guess I didn't think. But then you said you didn't want to have sex anymore, but wanted me to stay anyway- so I... used you... I mean, I still... liked you? Obviously, or else I wouldn't've slept with you.. twice! I mean- God, I'm such a horrible person.."

Renjun doesn't have to say anything to that.

"Well, and then things went so great – except for the Jaemin thing – and for the first time ever, I felt loved? Because I was? Literally, half the time I wished I would've stayed the time we first hooked up so we could have a normal relationship that isn't based on me trying to save my ass and using you... But everything was so beautiful. You made me feel safe, and I pretty much forgot about the app. I really just enjoyed being with you. I enjoyed falling in love with you. Even meeting your parents and friends, how you sorted out the Jaemin thing for me..."

Renjun believes you are genuine.

"That's it... I think.. I just- I'm sorry... I shouldn't have lied to you.. I should've just been honest from the beginning and said I made a mistake or whatever but- I don't know, I didn't. I guess I was scared? I don't know.. But please, I need you to believe me when I say everything after that was real. I love you. I like you, everything about you, and not only because you're kind and offered me a home... basically, no. I like you for you. I love you. Even if you-" you choke up briefly "decide that you don't want to be with me anymore, I just need you to believe me when I say... that I truly love you. I never lied about that, ever. Not once. And I wouldn't in a million years."

"Is that all?" Renjun asks after a minute. You, looking at him for the first time, nod. Before his heart can start beating again, before the butterflies can come back, he needs to remind himself that you used him. You used him and you lied.

"I mean, this is a lot," Renjun starts. You suddenly seem to be unable to look at him anymore. "I feel- actually I don't really know how I feel, but thank you for.. being honest, I hope?"

"I promise."

"I'm going to be honest, I feel... betrayed?"

"Rightfully so."

"I need some time to think about it... Is it.. okay.." Renjun rethinks his decision of asking you beforehand, "I'm going to need to take a walk.. clear my head, make up my mind. I'm not going to ask you to stay, but I'm also not asking you to leave. Do what you will..."

"I understand," you nod, and Renjun gets up. "Wait-"

Renjun halts and turns around to look at you getting up from your place on the carpet. "This might be.. wrong? Toxic? But... can I... if this is the last time I can... if you decide to.. not be with me... can I kiss you one last time?"

Renjun feels his throat close up at your words. Either you're a really, really good liar or you're being honest about your feelings. His breath hitches, his heart performs summersaults in his chest, and his voice trembles, "you can."

Carefully you lean in, slowly pressing your lips against his. There is not much going on, your hands gently hover on his shoulders, barely touching him at all, and your lips just stay still against his. Still, Renjun feels like a thousand silent words and a million hidden emotions clear up as his eyes close to feel you against him. His breath is shaky, he feels himself getting hot as more tears well up behind his closed lids. He really doesn't want to let you go.

As you part from him, his lips chase you for a split second before he realizes what he's doing. "I should get going."

"Be safe." You nod again and Renjun hears the threatening tears in your voice. God, how badly he wants to believe you.

'I love you, I love you!', his heart screams at him to scream at you, but he doesn't. Instead, he steps out of the room, grabs his keys, slips into his shoes and jacket, and heads out without looking back.

The cold air hits his face. Yet, unlike in the movies, he still doesn't feel any clearer. He still feels used and betrayed, he still feels like shit, but he knows he loves you. But is that enough of a reason to forgive you?

He tries to be logical, debate his options, but he can't focus. All that swirls around his brain is how your lips felt on his, and he wonders if kissing you was a mistake. This stupid, romantic mind of his...

Inevitably, after walking around the neighborhood for a good hour, thinking of nothing and everything, he decides that maybe he still isn't in the right mind to make a decision on his own. But who is he going to ask? Fucknut #1 and Serial-Fucker #2? Definitely not.

Therefore, he is glad his mother answers the phone after the second ring. Immediately, she knows something is up, and Renjun repeats the things you have told him (with less sexual details, as to be expected) to his mother who listens patiently.

Except for a "that's where I know her from!" and a short explanation how she saw a picture of you amongst your colleagues when she read that article about the love app, she just listens. Maybe he should've asked her about it back then, about the article. Maybe none of this would have happened. But then, he wouldn't have you in his life.

When he is done and asks for advice, she appears calm.

"Oh, Junnie. Love can be a funny thing. See, when I met your father, it wasn't easy either. Both of our families were against us, our lives were so different from each other, and still, there was so much connecting us that it had to be fate. I know it's hard to trust after something like this, I can only imagine what you're feeling right now, but you're a smart kid, you'll know what's right."

"But what would you do? What do you think?" Renjun asks.

His mother sighs and chuckles slightly. "Maybe I'm just a hopeless romantic like you are, but... people make mistakes, Junnie. The universe brought you together so many times, I think it's fate. I don't know if you should forgive her, but I know I would."

"You would? You don't think I'm crazy? You don't think I'm letting her walk all over me?"

"Not that this should matter, but you haven't been completely honest with her either if I remember correctly?" His mom reminds him, and Renjun suddenly feels a bit lighter.

"The psychic," he mumbles.

"That's right. She told you you were going to be alone forever if you didn't meet someone by the end of this year, and that's the reason you signed up for that app in the first place. And a part of me believes that that's the reason why you even let her stay with you, why you were so willing to ignore all signs that something was up. Maybe you already knew?" His mother suggests and Renjun doesn't like it one bit how similar they are. Or maybe he does.

"How do you know me so well?" He whines, feeling a bit more confident about letting that kiss linger in his mind for so long.

"I raised you!" She chuckles and Renjun can feel himself smile. He thanks her again before ending the call before turning on his heels to head back home. God, he only hopes you're still there.

______

When Renjun unlocks the door to the apartment, his hands are shaking. It took him a good three attempts to finally get the key into the lock. Admittedly, he is nervous because, well, for obvious reasons, but he also isn't sure if you're still there. Your past of skidaddling when things get serious gives him every right to feel anxious as he listens for any signs of you still being around as he takes of his shoes.

He doesn't dare call out for you, instead he begins searching the place. He's not sure what's going to happen when he finds you since, well, it hasn't been nice of him to just leave you behind, but what was he going to do?!

His search is pointless, he realizes as he steps out of the last room, the bathroom, and you're not there. Honestly, he wasn't really confident that you'd still be there, but he had hope. What raises his eyebrow is that your stuff is still there, no longer cramped into the corner he threw them in a few hours ago, but neatly sorted and packed in case this was really the final day of your stay. But, point is: it's still there. Now why in the world would you head off and go your own way and leave all that behind.

It's then when the door is unlocked once again, your figure slipping in, red and puffy eyes meeting the puzzled Renjun standing in the hallway.

"Y-you're back," you deduct correctly, taking off your shoes and stepping inside.

"Sure am." Renjun isn't sure why he still sounds so pissed when he is here to forgive you. On a second thought, maybe he's too quick with it? Should he really listen to his mom and just- forgive you? Just like that? Oh, he already knows Donghyuck is going to put out a whole speech about how Renjun is "high on pussy" and "not thinking straight". But... he wants to. He wants to forgive you. He wanted to from the very first moment he saw that weird E-Mail. He just couldn't. And now he can... can he?

"I just went out to get your favorite snack from the little store down the street.. I thought it might... make you feel better," you finally reveal why you left the apartment and Renjun's heart jumps. "I dunno, I just- wanted to do something nice regardless of your decision." You nod to yourself.

Renjun just looks at you as you are unable to meet his eyes.

"They didn't have it, so I went to the other store, the one by the subway station, and they actually were out of stock, but I begged the guy to go check if they had some left somewhere," you inform him, shyly looking up at him, "my current state must've convinced him it was urgent." You smile weakly and motion to your face.

Renjun can't keep his strong demeanor up any longer. Two big steps (wow, he has to inform his doctor that his legs must've grown a few centimeters) and he's right in front of you, cupping your cheeks. "I love you," he simply says, your face so confused that you can only stutter a few syllables before Renjun crashes his lips to yours.

And, God, does it feel good. Honestly, he has so much more time to actually think about what you did, and what it means in the future, but he needs you here with him, right now, always and forever. Sure, it's going to take a bit for him to built his trust again, but for now, he doesn't actually care.

"I love you too," you manage to breathe out when Renjun parts from you.

"I realized a few things. And I may have been a bit dramatic? But, well, I also have a confession to make."

_____

Renjun pushed the admittedly tacky (and stereotypical? Renjun did get slight cultural appropriation vibes) curtain aside to slip into the dimly lit room, although once he entered, the aura of the room changed his mind completely. It's not that he had a sense for spirituality, but he has always been deeply interested in the matter, which made him glad his mother suggested to try it out once.

So this was it, Renjun's first Tarot card reading.

The lady had been super nice, Renjun could tell by one single glance she was competent and very able to perform this life changing reading for him.

"What question brings you here today?" She asked, shuffling her deck of cards which Renjun could not take his eyes off.

"Ask about your love life!" His mom urged beside him, giggling like the sunshine she is, and Renjun chuckled quickly before averting his eyes to look at the lady in front of them.

"Just- my future? If there is anything important I should know?" He decided since that would not exclude his mom's interests.

"Very well," the lady nodded and began shuffling the cards quicker, her hands rushing until one card fell out.

"Ah, The Fool," she explained, and Renjun frowned. His mother couldn't contain a chuckle. "Do not worry, dear. This is no description of your self. Instead The Fool can symbolize new beginnings. There is most likely change waiting for you."

Renjun felt his heart beat up his throat in a positive way, making him giddy to find out more. The lady shuffled her cards some more until two cards fell out at the same time.

"Here we have The Ace of Cups, upright, and The Lovers. There appears to be a new relationship waiting for you, a romantic one."

Renjun gently elbowed his mom next to him who seemed as erratic as he was right now.

"Oh dear, The High Priestess in reverse... this new relationship might be full of secrets, which can be good or bad, exciting or dangerous," The lady deducted, and Renjun gulped.

As she started shuffling again, three cards sprang out of the deck immediately, making even Renjun feel the urgency.

"Two of Wands, The Hermit, The Ace Of Pentacles," the lady read out, sounding worried.

"Why? What does it mean?" Renjun asked, worry also evident in his tone.

"Two of Wands might represent the urgency of this. You have to take action soon, or else – here comes The Hermit – you may find loneliness. The Ace of Pentacles shows us the time frame: one year. I get the strong feeling these cards are telling you to hurry finding that love, or you might be alone forever."

_____

"So basically that's why you've been this patient with me?"

"Basically," Renjun responds, feeling a bit bad about it, "I feel like I should've told you sooner?"

"Jun, don't worry. You're not the one who messed up here. If anything, this makes me feel a tiny bit better about how manipulative I've been..." You admit, frowning.

"Well, I'm not the only one calling the shots here," Renjun summarizes, "so I'm asking you: Do you still want to be my girlfriend?"

"Are you joking? I feel like you are," you say, a wide grin spreading over your face.

"Nope, I'm super serious," Renjun chuckles and pokes your shoulder for reasons he is not aware of.

"Wow, and here I was contemplating to offer you anal to make up for it," you joke (?).

Renjun blinks at you, his smile falling into a crooked smirk at the proposal of your kind offering. "I mean... is the offer still on the table?"

"You are such a man," you pinch him, but do not reject the idea.

"What if we did it right now? Right here?" Renjun suddenly grabs your waist, pulling you closer to his body and starts kissing your neck. His tone (hopefully) brings across that he's joking, that you obviously won't do it right now, but not never either, if you're still up for it.

"You'd be the first," you chuckle before kissing Renjun's nose.

"Stop making me hard," he mumbles before attacking you with more kisses. "I know it's only been like a few hours, but I missed you so much. Let's not fight ever again, yeah?"

"I agree," you say and Renjun pulls back to look at you. Maybe this is silly, maybe he forgives too easily, but it just feels right. The look in your eyes is so genuine, as was the offer of doing butt stuff, that Renjun is just pretty much sure that this was this one big thing every relationship has and now it will only get better.

"Or is there anything else you need to tell me," Renjun teases.

"Not a thing, you now know everything there is to know about me, which, admittedly, isn't that much.. do you have a confession to make?"

Renjun thinks for a second. "Well, just this one thing. Remember when we went to Jaemin's to talk things out? He was practically naked when I went in there and I may have stared a bit until I remembered that he is disgusting."

"Oh, word. His chest is super-"

"Hey." Renjun furrows his brows half playfully joking, half dead serious. "I get to say that. You don't."

You mimic zipping your mouth shut, locking it and throwing the key away. Renjun laughs and takes your hand in his to hold. "So, all this talk about anal and Jaemin... why don't we take this to the bedroom?"

"You really won't let this go, huh?" You smirk. "I'd say: what comes around goes around. Whatever you do to my butt, I'll do to yours."

"I believe I have never loved you more than right now," Renjun sighs before kissing you once again, on the mouth this time, and he feels like time stands still and rushes past double it's normal speed. His hands wander over your body, taking everything in, feeling you against him because you are his, once again, finally. Your hands are as excited touching him, and it dawns on Renjun that you're probably not going to make it to the bedroom, which is fine since he owns this entire place anyway (it's a rental, but you get the point).

Both of your clothes are off in no time, leaving Renjun's hands to freely roam over your naked skin, and it feels just as exhilarating as if you'd never had that fight. That stupid, stupid fight, right now, Renjun can't even remember what it was about, but that could partly be because of the lack of blood in his brain. His heavy erection is currently pressed heavenly against your lower stomach as you make out wildly, and Renjun can't even think about the usual foreplay he finds so important as you start rubbing your wetness all over him. He just wants to be in you, be connected to you, feel all of you against and around him, have the both of you desperately grinding and panting against each other.

Although, he feels kind of more dominant today, maybe there is still a very slight aftertaste of your betrayal lingering and he feels the need to show you that he can be in control over you if he wants to, or maybe he just feels extra manly and prideful today after you did everything to prove to him that you want him in your life. He decides that being on top would be enough to satisfy that need, so he gently pushes you back and lays you down on your back.

His tip brushes over your clit and you whine, a sound that is music to Renjun's ears, and when you speak up and practically beg him to just "put it in", who is he to deny you that wish?

Aligning himself with your hole, he gently pushes forward, allowing his tip to disappear between your velvety walls, and he loves how your eyes roll back and you gasp at how good he feels.

"Only the tip and you're already drooling," he observes, biting his lower lip smugly before pulling back out and repeating the action of fucking just the tip into you several times before giving in to your quiet pleas and pushes all the way in.

You choke on your moan at this, eyes glazed over with lust finding Renjun's under eyebrows furrowed by pleasure. Renjun can already feel you pulsating around him and God does that stroke his ego.

Although he decides he could be having more of an effect on you right now, so he places your legs on his shoulders instead of around his waist, and practically folds you in half to open you up for him so he can fill you deeper, so deeply his tip grazes at your cervix. To intensify your pleasure, his fingers come up to rub at your wet clit, three fingers massaging the nub in quick circles, the wetness allowing him to glide over the surface perfectly.

And your body seems to agree. In no time – Renjun's sure he must've set a new record – you announce that you're ready, seconds away from reaching your high, and Renjun thinks twice about letting you taste it. Well, you did kind of fuck up, but fuck it. Renjun loves the look on your face when you cum just too much to deny you it, instead spurring you on by telling you just how good you are for him, what a perfect girl you are and how much he loves having you cum on his cock.

Seconds later, you orgasm, clamping walls choking his dick in the best way possible, the look on your face and the moans sounding from your throat so pretty that Renjun feels like he's fallen in love all over again. When you come down, he praises you and kisses you, never missing an opportunity to tell you just how perfect you are.

"More," you whisper to him, eyelids heavy as your blurred view tries to find Renjun's eyes, and he briefly chuckles before granting your wish.

"Greedy are we?" He sets a faster pace this time, balls slapping against your ass where your wetness had already dripped down and probably seeped into the couch. Renjun feels so good, so happy, so fulfilled, and he is once again reminded why it was the right decision to forgive you. He is such a man, he thinks, and is reminded of a few minutes ago when you said that to him.

"Can you turn around for me, baby?" He asks, suddenly in the mood to watch your ass as he repeatedly disappears into you, and you comply, allowing him to pull out before getting on your hands and knees. Renjun grins seeing your beautiful ass in front of him, he gently slaps it two times before gently pressing on your back to get you to lie down for him again, though this time on your stomach. He enters you again, filling you up perfectly once again, like you were made for each other, and he puts his entire weight on you to be able to still whisper in your ear.

His fingers find your hair, not to pull, just to be there so you feel it, and as he rams himself inside repeatedly, he mumbles the dirtiest things to you, about how well you're taking him, how beautiful you look underneath him and how much he just loves to fuck you. And yes, he even goes into detail (damnit Donghyuck) about how perfectly tight you are for him. A hand sneaks between your body and the couch, fingers quickly finding your clit again and you whine.

"'s so good," you say, voice trembling, "love you s'much."

"I love you too, baby," Renjun responds, grinning ear to ear like a maniac because he just loves this effect he has on you. This might just be a fantasy, but he's sure he's the only one who could ever make you feel this good. And admittedly, even right now when you're not doing much except take it, you make him feel just as good.

"Fuck, I think I'm gonna cum," he grunts, and you whine, cunt clenching around him at the mere prospect of him reaching his high.

"Me too, God," you manage to bring out.

"Where do you want it?" Renjun asks. Although he already knows your answer, he loves hearing you say it.

"I-inside, please," you mewl, arching your back a bit more to give him perfect access, "cu- cumming, cumming, cumming."

And just as you orgasm around him, walls wrapping around Renjun's cock impossibly tight, he follows suit, pressing his hips against your ass to fill you as deeply as possible. He pushes in a few more times to really get it all in there, have all his cum so deep inside you'll still feel it the next day.

"God, fuck, I love you so much," he pants, now a little exhausted as the adrenaline washes off. He pulls out, allowing you to turn around on your back and smile at him. God, he loves seeing you fucked out like this.

"I love you," you reply, then your nose scrunches and Renjun remembers that, when you shoot cum inside someone, it's going to inevitably drip back out, and he doesn't have to ruin his couch any more than he already did.

______

Renjun's arm is draped over your body, cuddling and talking in bed after the intense 4 rounds you just had, and maybe Renjun should've seen it coming, but honestly? How could he? So he jumps as he hears the doorbell ring.

"Who the fuck..." he mumbles as he gets up, puts on some underwear (at least) and stumbles to the door.

"Tell them to come back tomorrow, I'm not done with you," you giggle behind him as you slip into one of Renjun's shirts and a pair of panties you find laying on the floor. Renjun grins and throws you a wink before turning on the speaker.

"Hello?"

"Congratulations!"

"What the fuck are you asshats doing here?" Renjun groans and hides his face in his unoccupied hand. You have stepped over and are now pressing your ear against the speaker to be able to listen as well.

"We heard the news and came to celebrate?" Jaemin says.

"Actually, we didn't know how it went so we brought booze either for celebrating or for condolences. We took a wild guess," Donghyuck adds.

"How do you even-"

"Your mom told me."

"I don't think I appreciate you being involved with my mom..."

"Your words, not mine. Now open up."

"We're not exactly... dressed appropriately," Renjun informs and he can hear Jaemin howl and Donghyuck laugh.

"Let us in, we'll give you 2 minutes," Jaemin says.

"As if I'm going to believe you'd be passing an opportunity to barge in and see my girlfriend in her undies," Renjun says.

"Open up!" Donghyuck pushes.

"We just fucked four times!" You chime in, and Renjun isn't sure why you needed to clarify what didn't need to be clarified. Especially since, except for a few cheers that die down quickly, it's silent for a good 20 seconds until Donghyuck informs you that the old lady living two floors below just came home and most definitely heard that.

"Just let us in," Jaemin shouts right into the speaker and Renjun has to hold it away from his ear to not go deaf.

"Are you okay with this? I'm sure I could make them leave... somehow..."

"Sure! I could take two more," you joke and Renjun squints at you, making you teasingly roll your eyes. "Kidding."

"Okay, give us a few," Renjun says and just hangs up before they can complain. You both run into the bedroom and get changed into relatively acceptable clothing and Renjun has the decency to at least open a window to make the strong smell of sex lighten a bit before he checks in with you again, then opens the door.

Donghyuck and Jaemin's hollers can be heard echoing through the hallways until they finally show up at Renjun's door step.

"Nice work, man," Jaemin compliments as he sees the state of your still slightly tousled hair, and pats Renjun's back. They take off their shoes and let themselves in. While Jaemin stores the alcohol they brought in the fridge, Donghyuck skips into the living room to occupy Renjun's phone charger.

Oh, no. The living room.

Renjun darts after him, holding onto the door frame to not fall from the immense speed of his sprint, but it's too late. Donghyuck is already grinning at the used tissues scattered around the place and Renjun's underwear dangling from the uplight.

"You really are just high on pussy, it seems," Donghyuck teases, clearly hinting at how Renjun forgave you too (?) quickly. "You're not thinking straight. Or too straight..."

"You don't even know the whole story," Renjun defends himself while crossing his arms.

"Don't worry man, I'm not judging. I feel like this is the right thing for you," Donghyuck says and Renjun is surprised at his choice of words... such a... lack of disgusting-ness? Donghyuck even trots over and places a brotherly hand on Renjun's shoulder and gives him a smile.

"Thank you," Renjun says and means it. Donghyuck takes a few steps back, bows, then his eyes lock in on something on the floor.

"I think I'm taking these with me," Donghyuck announces before bending down further and holding up your panties with his forefinger.

"Don't you dare-" Renjun warns, but Donghyuck already started pushing the fabric into his pocket.

"Take it out," you say, suddenly appearing behind Renjun. Donghyuck seems taken aback, especially as you step over and grab his hair. "Give. Them. Back."

You pull hard, only once, and Donghyuck moans, but complies, and Renjun is party impressed and partly enraged.

"Starting without me?" Jaemin grins as he, too, has appeared in the room by now.

"Guys, I think we need some boundaries regarding my girlfriend," Renjun hisses through grit teeth. You agree, finally letting go of Donghyuck's hair who falls to his knees. Jaemin shrugs and sits down on the couch just as Renjun stuffs the used tissues into his pocket.

"What do you say?" You address Donghyuck who whines out a pathetic apology. You grin. "Sorry, this is kind of fun," you whisper to Renjun.

"I mean if you want to, you could talk like that to me every once in a while-" Renjun mumbles back, immediately feeling you cling to his side.

"Yeah?" You bite your lip.

"There was some talk about boundaries?" Jaemin recalls and you back off a bit. "When I can't have it, at least don't rub it in my face- unless you're going to literally rub it in my face-"

"I swear to God-"

© 2023 YUTASBELLYBUTTONPIERCING all rights reserved — please DO NOT translate, take, nor repost any of my works.

[cynic-spirit]

Dragonsoul ii

Warnings: very long very fluffy

Read part 1 here

Aemond’s frustration simmered beneath the surface, but it quickly morphed into a steely determination. He wasn’t going to let Aegon’s reckless behavior dictate his fate. He had come too close to discovering his soulmate to give up now.

There was still one way he could find her. He recalled the faces of the guests from the night before—their reactions, the fleeting glimpses of their expressions as they’d watched the chaos unfold. If he could retrace his steps and gather information from those who had been there, he might be able to piece together who had caught his attention just before everything had gone awry.

“I need to talk to the staff,” he thought decisively. The waitstaff and security would have seen everyone come and go, and they might have noticed something he hadn’t. They could help him identify who had been near the piano when he felt that spark of connection.

He stood up, feeling a renewed sense of purpose as he dressed in his usual all-black attire, the fabric feeling like armor against the world. “I’ll ask around,” he resolved, his mind racing with possibilities. “There has to be someone who saw her. Someone who can point me in the right direction.”

As he made his way through the Targaryen estate, Aemond’s thoughts turned to the woman who had unknowingly ignited something inside him. Her beauty, her talent—it had all captivated him in a way he hadn’t expected. “I need to find her,” he thought fiercely. “I need to know her name, her face. I can’t let this slip away again.”

Aemond navigated the hallways, seeking out the staff who had been present during the party. He would approach them with an air of authority, making it clear that he was serious about finding the woman whose golden thread had momentarily connected with his own.

“Today is the day,” he thought, his determination hardening. “I will uncover the truth and discover who she is, no matter what it takes.”

With a renewed sense of purpose, Aemond stepped into the bustling corridors of the estate, ready to hunt for the answers that would lead him to the one he knew was meant for him.Aemond made his way to the security office, his heart thumping in his chest. He could barely contain his anticipation as he approached the guard on duty, a burly man with a serious demeanor. “I need access to the recordings from last night’s party,” Aemond said, his voice steady.

The guard raised an eyebrow but nodded, pulling up the footage on the monitor. Aemond leaned closer, his pulse quickening as the video flickered to life. The vibrant chaos of the party unfolded on screen, the music and laughter echoing faintly through the room.

He watched as guests mingled, glasses clinking, laughter ringing out. Aegon was in the corner, his arm draped around a couple of giggling women, his carefree attitude radiating through the crowd. Nearby, a group of businessmen were deep in conversation, gestures animated as they discussed deals and connections, oblivious to the world around them.

Across the room, a couple danced closely, lost in their own little world, while others lounged on plush sofas, exchanging flirtatious glances. The atmosphere was alive, vibrant, a testament to the high society that had gathered.

But Aemond’s attention sharpened as he continued to watch, the chaos blurring into the background. He focused on a single figure moving through the throng: the pianist. Y/n stood at the edge of the stage, her long black hair cascading down her back, her expression contemplative as she prepared to play. Unlike the others, who were absorbed in their conversations and laughter, she seemed poised and serene, a stark contrast to the whirlwind of activity around her.

As the moment of her entrance approached, Aemond felt a stirring in his chest, an electric sensation that mirrored the burn he had felt in his wrist. The instant she sat at the piano and began to play, he watched in awe as the golden shimmer reappeared on his thread, igniting with a warmth that swept through him.

“Could it be?” he thought, a rush of hope flooding his senses. He leaned closer, eyes narrowing as he replayed the moment. The music enveloped the room, pulling the attention of every guest, but Aemond’s focus remained solely on her.

He felt the realization wash over him, clarity dawning. Y/n—the pianist—had not only caught his eye but had ignited the connection he had been longing for. This was the moment when the burn began, when his thread transformed in response to her presence.

Aemond’s heart raced as he absorbed this new understanding. “This is her,” he thought, a sense of determination igniting within him. “I will find her. I will make sure she knows what she means to me.”

With renewed purpose, he leaned back in his chair, ready to unravel the mystery of Y/n and to claim the connection that had nearly slipped through his fingers.

Y/n sat at a small café table with her colleagues, nursing a cup of tea as they recounted the chaos of the Targaryen party. The laughter and teasing of her friends swirled around her, but the memory of Aegon’s drunken antics still weighed heavily on her mind.

“Never again am I going near Targaryens,” Y/n declared, shaking her head with an exasperated smile. “Aegon started shooting! I couldn’t even find my soulmate with all that chaos!”

Her friends exchanged knowing glances, mischief lighting up their eyes. “What if a Targaryen is your soulmate, huh?” one of them teased, waggling her eyebrows.

Y/n rolled her eyes, a nervous laugh escaping her lips. “No, no, no. It can’t be. I heard the one-eyed mobster, Aemond Targaryen, still carries a black thread.”

The mention of Aemond sent a shiver down her spine. She felt a mix of fear and intrigue. “It cannot be. It shouldn’t be,” she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper.

“Aemond?” one friend pressed, leaning in with a teasing smile. “You mean the devilishly handsome one? The one with the dangerous reputation?”

Y/n tried to suppress the flutter of her heart at the thought of him. Aemond was strikingly attractive, his presence commanding attention wherever he went. His silver-blonde hair fell just above his sharp jawline, accentuating the angular planes of his face. Those piercing violet eyes seemed to see right through you, filled with a brooding intensity that could captivate anyone.

He had a rugged allure, a sense of danger wrapped in the sophistication of his all-black attire. The way he carried himself exuded confidence; every move he made was deliberate and measured. His chiseled features, combined with that signature scar across his eye, added to the enigmatic air that surrounded him.

Yet despite his undeniable charm, Y/n felt a pang of insecurity. “But I’m sure he wouldn’t want someone like me,” she replied, her voice tinged with a hint of doubt. “I’m just a music teacher, nothing compared to his world of power and crime.”

Her friends exchanged glances, sensing the internal struggle she faced. “Come on, Y/n,” one said, nudging her playfully. “You’re talented and beautiful! Anyone would be lucky to have you, even a Targaryen.”

Y/n shook her head, biting her lip as she considered the implications. Aemond was everything she had never expected to want, but the thought of him being her soulmate filled her with both excitement and dread. “Maybe it’s better if he’s not,” she said softly, glancing down at her tea. “The last thing I need is to get tangled up with someone like him.”

Yet, as her thoughts drifted back to Aemond’s piercing gaze and the connection she felt in his presence, a part of her couldn’t shake the feeling that their paths were destined to cross again.Aemond stood in the dimly lit office of his family estate, a file in his hand that felt heavier than it should. The front of the file bore the name “Y/n” in elegant cursive, and he couldn’t help but feel a sense of anticipation and intrigue as he opened it.

Inside, he found a wealth of information that painted a vivid picture of the woman who had unknowingly captivated him. Y/n had an elder sister, married with two children, a detail that struck Aemond as both heartwarming and grounding. It told him that she valued family and had responsibilities beyond herself.

But as he continued to read, he learned that Y/n had lost her father and that her mother lived in India, a reality that tugged at his heartstrings. The loss and distance in her life made her journey even more poignant. Here was a woman who had faced challenges yet continued to strive for a better future.

Aemond’s gaze lingered on the details about her profession. Y/n was a well-liked music teacher at a reputed university in King’s Landing, known for her talent and dedication. The thought of her inspiring young minds with the beauty of music made him feel something he hadn’t expected—admiration. He imagined her in the classroom, passionate and engaged, a stark contrast to the world he inhabited.

She also played for private parties to supplement her income, a move that showcased her ambition and determination. It was clear that she was supporting herself while pursuing a PhD in music. The idea of her pouring herself into her studies, driven by a desire to grow and improve, struck a chord within him. He found himself increasingly drawn to her strength and resilience.

With each detail he absorbed, Aemond felt an unfamiliar stirring in his chest. “I didn’t even want a soulmate,” he thought, a hint of frustration creeping into his mind. “It’s a weakness. It makes you vulnerable. Why am I wanting to know her?”

The conflict within him deepened. He had always believed that emotions were a distraction, something to be pushed aside in favor of power and control. Yet here he was, captivated by a woman who embodied everything he had denied himself—the warmth of family, the pursuit of passion, the ability to inspire.

“Is it because she’s beautiful?” he wondered, recalling her long black hair and the way she had captivated the room with her music. “Or is it something deeper?”

He felt drawn to her spirit, her determination to forge her own path despite the obstacles she faced. It was a stark contrast to the cold, ruthless world he operated in, where weakness was exploited and vulnerability was a liability.

“Am I so desperate for connection that I’m willing to chase after a woman like her?” Aemond thought, grappling with the realization that he didn’t want to just be a faceless mobster in the shadows. He wanted to know her story, her dreams, her fears. He felt a longing that he hadn’t anticipated—a desire to break through the barriers that had kept him isolated.

“Y/n,” he whispered to himself, the name rolling off his tongue like a melody. “I have to find her.” In that moment, he made a silent vow that he would not only uncover the truth about her but also confront the emotions stirring within him. Aemond was determined to seek out the connection he had been blind to for so long.“Are you smiling?” Aemond’s thoughts were abruptly interrupted by his brother’s voice, filled with mock surprise. Aegon had a talent for barging into his office without knocking, a habit that often grated on Aemond’s nerves.

“What’s this?” Aegon continued, reaching for the file in Aemond’s hand, his eyes glinting with curiosity. But before Aegon could catch a glimpse of its contents, Aemond swiftly snatched it away, clutching it tightly to his chest.

“Nothing of your interest,” he snapped, irritation flaring. He couldn’t bear the thought of Aegon ruining yet another opportunity to learn more about Y/n, the woman who had unexpectedly captured his attention. Aegon had a knack for turning serious matters into a joke, and Aemond was in no mood for that.

“What do you want?” Aemond asked, his voice laced with impatience, as he tried to redirect the conversation away from the file. He could feel his pulse quickening, the need to protect the budding connection he felt towards Y/n overriding his annoyance.

Aegon leaned against the doorframe, a playful grin plastered across his face. “I just wanted to see how my dear brother was doing,” he replied, feigning innocence. “But it looks like you’ve got something more interesting on your mind.”

Aemond narrowed his eyes, trying to maintain his composure. “I’m busy,” he said curtly, refusing to let Aegon pry into his thoughts or his plans. “If you don’t have anything important to discuss, I suggest you leave.”

“Oh, come on,” Aegon persisted, undeterred. “You can’t hide behind that file forever. What’s got you all worked up? Is it a woman?”

Aemond’s heart raced at the implication, but he quickly masked his reaction with irritation. “I said it’s nothing you need to concern yourself with,” he replied, his voice low but firm.

Aegon raised his hands in mock surrender, though his eyes danced with mischief. “Alright, alright. Just know that I’m here if you need advice on women. You know I’m a natural at it.”

With that, Aegon turned to leave, still chuckling to himself. Aemond watched him go, the annoyance bubbling beneath the surface. “Just stay out of this,” he thought fiercely, refocusing on the file in his hands. He couldn’t afford to let Aegon interfere, especially when it came to someone as intriguing and unique as Y/n.

Once he was alone again, Aemond took a deep breath, returning his attention to the file. “I have to figure this out,” he murmured to himself, determination coursing through him. “I won’t let anyone ruin my chance to know her.”In the bustling halls of the university, Y/n's friends, Jenny and Eliza, had started to notice subtle changes in her. Y/n had always been the quiet one, often keeping to herself, but lately, there was a new lightness in her step, a faint smile that lingered on her lips even when she thought no one was watching.

As they sat in the campus café during a break between classes, Jenny couldn’t contain her curiosity any longer. She leaned forward, resting her elbows on the table, and narrowed her eyes playfully at Y/n.

“Alright, spill,” Jenny demanded, her tone light but insistent. “What’s going on with you?”

Y/n looked up from her coffee, caught off guard by the sudden question. “What do you mean?” she asked, trying to sound nonchalant as she took a sip of her drink.

Eliza, who was sitting next to Jenny, chimed in, a knowing smile on her face. “Oh, come on, Y/n. We’ve known you for years. Something’s different. You’ve been smiling more, and you seem... I don’t know, more confident?”

Y/n felt her cheeks warm slightly under their scrutiny. She wasn’t ready to reveal anything about Aemond, not yet. The relationship was still so new, and she wasn’t sure how her friends would react if they knew who her soulmate was. So, she decided to deflect.

“Really, it’s nothing,” she said with a small laugh. “I guess I’ve just been focusing more on my music lately. Things have been going well, you know?”

Jenny wasn’t convinced. She raised an eyebrow, tilting her head as she studied Y/n’s face. “Just music, huh? That’s all?”

“Yes, really,” Y/n insisted, nodding a little too quickly. “I’ve been getting more opportunities to play at events, and it’s given me a lot more confidence. I’m just... happy with where things are going.”

Eliza leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms. “Well, whatever it is, it looks good on you. But if there’s something—or someone—you’re not telling us about, we’ll find out eventually.”

Y/n smiled, grateful that they didn’t press her further. “I promise, it’s just the music,” she said, trying to steer the conversation in a different direction. “Speaking of which, I’m thinking of playing something new for my next gig. Any suggestions?”

Jenny and Eliza exchanged a look but let it go, shifting their focus to the discussion of music. Y/n joined in, feeling a sense of relief wash over her. She wasn’t ready to share her secret yet, but she knew it wouldn’t be long before her friends started asking more questions. For now, she was content to keep Aemond to herself, savoring the connection they were building, one day at a time.Jenny wasn’t ready to let Y/n off the hook just yet. She leaned in closer, her eyes narrowing with playful suspicion. “Bach and Mozart, huh? I’m sorry, Y/n, but I don’t believe for a second that it’s just classical music putting that glow on your face.”

Eliza chuckled, nodding in agreement. “Yeah, unless you’re having some secret love affair with a grand piano, there’s gotta be something else going on. Come on, spill!”

Y/n felt her heart race a little, but she managed to keep her composure. She shrugged, forcing a laugh as she waved off their teasing. “I swear, it’s just the music! Maybe I’m just getting better at it, or maybe it’s all those late-night practice sessions. But really, that’s all there is to it.”

Jenny and Eliza exchanged skeptical looks, but Y/n didn’t give them a chance to press further. She quickly changed the subject, her eyes lighting up as an idea struck her. “But speaking of fun,” she said, “it’s been a while since we’ve gone out dancing, hasn’t it? Why don’t we go to a club tonight? It’s the weekend, and I’m pretty sure we’re all free.”

The sudden shift caught both Jenny and Eliza off guard, but they didn’t mind. Eliza grinned, clearly excited by the suggestion. “That sounds like a great idea! We haven’t had a night out in forever.”

Jenny, still eyeing Y/n with a hint of suspicion, eventually let the matter drop, her excitement for a night out winning over her curiosity. “Alright, fine, I’ll let it go—for now. But don’t think we’re not coming back to this later, Y/n. In the meantime, let’s dance the night away.”

Y/n smiled, relieved that the conversation had shifted. “Deal,” she said, raising her coffee in a mock toast. “Let’s meet up after classes and make a night of it.”

As they made plans for their evening, Y/n felt a mixture of relief and anticipation. She knew she couldn’t keep her secret forever, but for now, she was content to keep Aemond to herself, even as she enjoyed a night of fun with her friends.Aemond felt the weight of realization settle deep within him as he learned about Y/n. The idea of having a soulmate, someone destined for him, was difficult to grasp. He had always imagined that if he had a soulmate, they would be as hardened and ruthless as he was—a partner in his darkness. But Y/n was nothing like that. She was an incredibly talented and beautiful woman, a gentle soul that seemed at odds with his own cruel heart.

The need to clear his mind overwhelmed him, and without a second thought, he made his way to the stables. There, his black stallion, Vhagar, stood tall and imposing—a beast that no one else could tame, that no one else could even get near. Vhagar was a reflection of Aemond himself, a creature of power and darkness, loyal only to him.

Without hesitation, Aemond leapt onto Vhagar’s saddle, feeling the familiar thrill of control as he took the reins. “Run,” he commanded, and the stallion obeyed, galloping out of the stables and into the open fields.

The wind whipped against Aemond’s face as Vhagar tore through the landscape with untamed speed. The powerful rhythm of the horse’s hooves pounded in time with Aemond’s racing thoughts. Y/n’s face, her gentle smile, her soft voice—all of it consumed him. How could someone so pure be meant for someone like him? The very idea seemed impossible.

As they rode, Aemond tried to make sense of his emotions. He had spent years perfecting his control, burying any vulnerability beneath layers of cold indifference. And yet, Y/n was unraveling all of that without even trying. She had slipped past his defenses with her kindness, her talent, and her beauty, making him question everything he thought he knew about himself.

Vhagar’s pace didn’t falter as Aemond pushed him harder, trying to outrun his thoughts, his doubts. But no matter how fast they went, Y/n’s image remained, haunting him, consuming him. She was everything he wasn’t—light where he was dark, soft where he was hard. The contrast was undeniable, and it terrified him.

But as much as he tried to resist it, there was something intoxicating about the thought of her being his. Aemond had always believed he was destined for a life of solitude, that no one could truly understand or accept him. And yet, here was Y/n, a woman who seemed to see beyond his scar, beyond his reputation, to the man he was beneath it all.

He didn’t deserve her, he knew that much. But the idea of her being his, of having someone like her by his side, was a temptation he couldn’t ignore.

By the time he finally slowed Vhagar to a halt, Aemond’s heart was pounding not just from the ride, but from the realization that he was falling for her. Harder and faster than he ever thought possible. Y/n had awakened something in him, something he didn’t know he was capable of feeling—a desire to be better, to be worthy of her.

He dismounted Vhagar and stood still, his breathing heavy as he stared into the distance. The sun was beginning to set, casting long shadows over the fields, but Aemond’s mind was still racing.

He would need time to fully accept this new reality, to come to terms with the fact that Y/n was his soulmate. But one thing was clear: he would protect her with everything he had. Even if it meant facing the darkest parts of himself, even if it meant changing in ways he never thought possible.

Aemond reached out and patted Vhagar’s neck, the horse’s breathing heavy and warm against his hand. “Let’s go back,” he murmured, more to himself than to the stallion. Vhagar snorted in response, as if understanding the gravity of his master’s thoughts.

As they made their way back to the estate, Aemond knew that this was just the beginning. His life, his very soul, had been irrevocably changed by Y/n. And no matter how difficult the path ahead might be, he was determined to walk it with her by his side.s Aemond guided Vhagar back toward the estate, their pace had slowed to a relaxed trot. The earlier rush of adrenaline had faded, leaving Aemond alone with his thoughts and the steady rhythm of the stallion beneath him. The sun was beginning its descent, casting a warm, golden light over the landscape, but Aemond’s mind was far from serene. It was consumed by thoughts of Y/n.

Talking to Vhagar had become something of a habit for him. The stallion, like him, was a creature of strength and solitude, and Aemond often found it easier to confide in the beast than in any human. Vhagar understood him in a way no one else did—he was a loyal companion, one who didn’t judge or question, but simply listened.

“I’ve found my soulmate, Vhagar,” Aemond said quietly, the words feeling strange and unfamiliar on his tongue. “She’s… everything a man like me doesn’t deserve.”

He let out a slow breath, the weight of his thoughts pressing heavily on his chest. “She’s kind, talented, gentle… She’s like the light, while I’m the darkness. How could someone like her ever be meant for someone like me?”

Vhagar’s ears flicked back as if acknowledging his master’s voice. Aemond reached down, running a hand along the stallion’s powerful neck. The simple gesture was grounding, reminding him of the strength he possessed—the strength he would need to protect her.

“I suppose I’ve always been lonely,” he continued, his tone reflective. “Even with all the power and the people around me, there’s always been something missing. But with her… it’s different. She makes me feel different. Lighter. Better.”

They rode in silence for a few moments, Aemond’s thoughts churning like a stormy sea. Protecting Y/n would be his highest priority, but there was more to it than that. He wanted to make her happy, to show her that she was more than just a soulmate in name.

“You know,” he mused aloud, “I’ve been thinking… How should I introduce myself to her properly, Vhagar? I want to make an impression, something more than just the dangerous man she’s heard about.” He chuckled softly, shaking his head at the absurdity of asking advice from a horse. “I should probably get her a gift, don’t you think? But what?”

Aemond’s mind began to race with possibilities, each more extravagant than the last. “Diamonds?” he suggested, glancing down at Vhagar as if expecting a response. “A diamond crown, perhaps? Or maybe something more… practical. A Rolls Royce? What do you think, Vhagar? Any ideas?”

Vhagar snorted, the sound causing Aemond to smile despite himself. “You’re right,” he said with a chuckle. “Maybe I’m overthinking this. She’s not the type to be swayed by material things. She’s too genuine, too… pure. But still, I want to give her something that shows how much she means to me.”

He paused, the idea striking him suddenly. “How about a grand piano?” he murmured, more to himself than to Vhagar. “She plays beautifully—like Mozart or Beethoven. Maybe a grand piano, one made of gold and embellished with diamonds. She deserves something as grand as her talent.”

The thought of Y/n sitting at a piano crafted just for her, her delicate fingers gliding over the keys, made Aemond’s heart ache with a longing he hadn’t realized he was capable of feeling. It wasn’t just about the gift; it was about showing her that he understood her, that he appreciated her for who she was.

“Do you think she’d like that, Vhagar?” Aemond asked softly, almost as if seeking the stallion’s approval. “I want her to know that I see her, that I value her. She’s more than just a woman—a soulmate. She’s my light.”

As they approached the estate, Aemond’s thoughts were still swirling, but there was a determination in his heart now, a resolve to make things right with Y/n, to be the man she deserved—even if he didn’t believe he truly was that man.

“Maybe someday, I’ll bring her to meet you,” he said, his voice softer now, as if he were sharing a secret. “She might be a little scared of you at first, but I think she’d come around. She’s stronger than she looks, and she’d see that in you too. Maybe then, she’ll see that there’s more to me than just the darkness.”

Vhagar let out a low, rumbling neigh, almost as if in agreement. Aemond smiled, patting the stallion’s neck one last time as they approached the stable. “Yeah,” he murmured. “You’d like her. And maybe… she’ll learn to like me too. For who I really am.”

As they came to a stop, Aemond dismounted, his thoughts still lingering on Y/n. The future didn’t seem as daunting now, not with her in it. He knew there would be challenges, but he also knew he would face them head-on. For her. For them.

“We’ll figure it out,” he said quietly, more to himself than to Vhagar. But as the stallion snorted and tossed his head, Aemond couldn’t help but feel a sense of reassurance. Maybe, just maybe, everything would be alright.As Aemond made his way back from the estate, his thoughts were still centered on Y/n and the plans he was crafting in his mind. He was so deep in thought that he almost didn’t notice his mother, Alicent, approaching him from the opposite direction. Her presence, always calm and composed, had a way of grounding him, even when his mind was swirling with emotions.

“Aemond,” Alicent called out softly, a warm smile on her face as she reached him. “I’m glad I caught you. I wanted to inform you that we’re having a small gathering later today. It’s for Helaena’s entomology fundraising effort. We’ve invited a selected group of people to the estate—it’ll be held outside, in the garden.”

Aemond nodded, his thoughts still partially elsewhere, but his attention now focused on his mother. “I see. I’ll make sure to attend,” he replied, his voice steady, though his mind was already beginning to shift gears. A gathering at the estate wasn’t unusual, but the mention of Helaena’s event made him wonder who the guests would be.

Alicent’s smile grew a little wider, a hint of excitement in her eyes as she continued. “I also wanted to tell you… I’ve invited a particular artist to perform at the gathering. Do you remember the young woman who played the piano a few evenings ago? I was so taken by her talent. I thought it would be wonderful to have her play for us again.”

Aemond’s heart suddenly leaped into his throat. Y/n. His mind immediately conjured the image of her sitting gracefully at the piano, her fingers gliding effortlessly over the keys. The thought of seeing her again, so soon after their last encounter, sent a wave of nervousness through him—a feeling he wasn’t accustomed to.

He tried to maintain his composure, but the realization that Y/n would be at the estate, performing for his family and their guests, made his heart pound in his chest. He swallowed hard, his voice a touch more strained than before. “I… I’m sure it will be a beautiful performance,” he managed to say, his thoughts racing.

Alicent didn’t seem to notice her son’s sudden nervousness, as she continued to speak with her usual grace. “I thought you might enjoy hearing her play again. She has such a gift, doesn’t she? I’m looking forward to it.”

Aemond could only nod, his mind already spinning with the possibilities of what the evening might hold. The prospect of seeing Y/n again, in a setting where their paths would inevitably cross, both thrilled and terrified him. He wasn’t sure how he would react—how she would react—but he knew one thing: he couldn’t wait to see her.

As he walked with his mother back toward the estate, his thoughts were no longer consumed by the plans he had been crafting earlier. Instead, they were entirely focused on Y/n, and the anticipation of what the evening might bring. He could feel his heart thumping in his chest, an unfamiliar and unsettling sensation for someone who was usually so composed.

But as much as it unnerved him, it also excited him. Meeting Y/n again, so soon after their last encounter, felt like fate—like something that was meant to happen. And this time, he wouldn’t let the opportunity slip through his fingers. He would make sure she knew how much she meant to him, even if it terrified him to admit it.

As they neared the estate, Aemond took a deep breath, trying to steady himself. Whatever happened tonight, he would face it with the same determination he faced everything in his life. But this time, it wasn’t just about him—it was about Y/n, and the future they might share together.Aemond stood in front of the large mirror in his room, his reflection staring back at him with an intensity he hadn’t felt in a long time. Normally, his appearance was the least of his concerns—his intimidating aura, sharp features, and the scar that marred his face were all part of the armor he wore in the world. He knew he was attractive in a dark, severe way, and he used that to his advantage. But today, something was different.

For the first time, he was nervous about how he looked.

He ran a hand through his long silver hair, ensuring it was perfectly in place. His eye, the one not hidden beneath the patch, scanned the various suits laid out on the bed. He wanted everything to be perfect. The right suit, the right look—something that would make her see him not as the feared mobster, but as a man. A man who, for reasons he couldn’t fully understand, desperately wanted to make a good impression on her.

He reached for one of the suits, a deep, midnight blue that complemented his pale complexion and contrasted strikingly with his hair. As he slipped into the jacket, he adjusted the sleeves, making sure the fit was impeccable. He wanted to look his best, not for the people who would be at the gathering, but for Y/n.

His gaze shifted to the collection of colognes on his dresser. He never put much thought into such things before. A scent was a scent, and he was always one for simplicity. But today, he found himself carefully considering which fragrance to wear. He wanted something that would linger in her memory, something that would remind her of him long after they’d parted ways.

Aemond picked up a bottle, one with a subtle, warm scent—a blend of sandalwood and spice. It wasn’t overpowering, but it had a presence, much like he did. He dabbed it onto his neck and wrists, inhaling the scent as he did so. He’d never cared this much about how he smelled, about how anyone perceived him beyond the fear he naturally commanded. But today, he wanted Y/n to remember this about him. To associate this scent with the moments they would share.

He stepped back from the mirror, his heart beating faster than he liked to admit. He had faced countless enemies, made decisions that affected lives without a second thought, but this—this was different. This wasn’t about power or control. It was about a woman who had unwittingly come to mean more to him than he ever thought possible.

Aemond adjusted his tie, straightened his jacket one last time, and took a deep breath. This was uncharted territory for him, but he wasn’t one to back down from a challenge. He just hoped that when Y/n saw him tonight, she would see more than just the scarred, fearsome man the world knew. He wanted her to see him—the man who was ready to lay everything on the line for her.

With one last glance in the mirror, Aemond turned and left his room, ready to face whatever the evening might bring.Aemond entered the gathering, the soft glow of the evening casting long shadows across the estate. The hum of conversation faded into the background as his senses focused on something far more captivating—the faint, melodic sound of a piano. The notes floated through the air, delicate and precise, as if each one was calling to him. He recognized the piece instantly—Elgar's Salut d'Amour, Op. 12.

He stopped in his tracks, his breath catching in his throat. She was already here.

His eyes scanned the gathering until they found her, and his heart skipped a beat. Y/n was seated at the piano, her fingers gliding effortlessly over the keys. She was dressed in a stunning midnight blue gown that hugged her figure gracefully, the rich color a perfect contrast to her long black hair, which was elegantly tied up in a bun. The way she looked—poised, serene, and utterly beautiful—left him momentarily breathless.

Aemond's own appearance, with his long white hair left loose, felt starkly different beside her, yet somehow, he couldn’t help but think they complemented each other perfectly—night and day, dark and light. He caught himself adjusting his suit again, a small gesture of nerves that he rarely experienced. But tonight was different. Tonight, he wanted to look his best, to leave a lasting impression on her.

As he stood at the edge of the gathering, he let the music wash over him, each note resonating deep within. His gaze remained locked on Y/n, who was oblivious to his presence, completely absorbed in her performance. The golden light of the setting sun bathed her in an almost ethereal glow, making her appear like a vision from another world.

Aemond's heart pounded with a mixture of emotions—admiration, longing, and something deeper, something he hadn’t allowed himself to feel in a long time. He wanted her, not just as a soulmate, but as a partner, someone he could protect and cherish. The realization of how much she meant to him struck him with full force.

As the final notes of Salut d'Amour hung in the air, Aemond felt a quiet resolve settle within him. He wasn’t just a man who had found his soulmate—he was a man who was ready to do whatever it took to win her heart. Tonight, he would make his intentions clear. He would show her not just the man he was, but the man he could be for her.

Taking a deep breath, he adjusted his suit one last time and stepped further into the gathering, his eyes never leaving Y/n. His heart thumped harder as he moved closer, feeling the weight of the moment pressing down on him. Tonight, he would make sure she remembered him—not just as the mobster she had heard about, but as the man who was completely captivated by her.“This is my second son, Aemond,” Alicent introduced him to one of the benefactors, her voice warm but formal.

“Ah, Aemond Targaryen, it’s a pleasure to meet you,” the benefactor said, extending a hand. “I’ve heard much about your family’s business. Quite impressive, I must say.”

“Thank you,” Aemond replied, his voice steady. “We strive to uphold our family’s reputation.” His mind, however, was elsewhere, his single eye repeatedly drifting toward the piano, where Y/n had been playing just moments ago.

As the conversation continued, Aemond nodded along, offering polite responses, but his thoughts were consumed by her presence.

“Aemond, pay attention,” Alicent chided gently as the benefactor excused himself. “This is important. Where is your mind at?”

Aemond hesitated, caught off guard. “I—uh, I’m sorry, Mother. Just… admiring the music.”

Alicent raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced. “You’re more than just a listener at these gatherings. You need to engage, especially with potential partners in business.”

“Of course,” Aemond replied, his frustration bubbling beneath the surface. “But—”

“Just keep your focus, Aemond,” Alicent interrupted, her tone softening slightly. “I know you’ve been through a lot, but it’s important to make connections.”

He nodded, but his heart raced as he looked back toward the piano, eager to catch another glimpse of Y/n. However, to his dismay, she was no longer there. The space she had occupied felt emptier without her presence, and an unfamiliar sense of anxiety gnawed at him. Where had she gone?Aemond stood by the open patio, feeling out of place amidst the laughter and chatter of the gathering. The dimly lit room was filled with people exchanging pleasantries, and he felt like a ghost in the midst of their bright spirits. The laughter of the guests felt distant, their conversations swirling around him like an endless fog.

Every time he tried to engage in small talk with someone—Tom, Dick, or Harry, as he mentally labeled them—his mind drifted back to the piano, to Y/n. She had been a vision in that midnight blue gown, and the way she played tugged at something deep within him. Yet, as the minutes stretched into an eternity, he couldn’t shake off the gnawing feeling of restlessness.

“Excuse me,” he said abruptly to the last man he had been conversing with, a boisterous man who spoke far too loudly about his latest business ventures. Aemond had lost interest long ago, and now he just wanted to escape.

He stepped outside, the cool evening air washing over him like a balm. The sounds of the party faded behind him as he made his way toward the stables, feeling the weight of his unease settle in his chest. He needed to breathe, to clear his mind of the chaos inside.As Aemond approached the stables, a sweet sight greeted him, one that instantly melted the tension in his chest. There was Vhagar, his majestic black stallion, standing with his head lowered, enjoying gentle caresses from Y/n. She was perched on the stall door, a radiant smile lighting up her face as she offered Vhagar sugar cubes, giggling at the way he nuzzled her hand.

The sound of her laughter was like music to Aemond’s ears, pulling him from the dark thoughts that had clouded his mind. He stood frozen for a moment, watching her interact with the beast, her long black hair cascading over her shoulders. The contrast between her and the massive stallion was striking, yet there was a beauty in the moment that captivated him.

“Look at you, you big sweetheart!” Y/n said, her voice soft and affectionate, as Vhagar happily accepted another sugar cube. She was so engrossed in the moment that she didn’t even notice Aemond standing there, watching her with admiration.

Aemond felt a rush of warmth flood through him, a mix of protectiveness and longing. Here was Y/n, so carefree and joyful, and he couldn’t help but be drawn to her vibrant spirit. She was nothing like he had ever known—a gentle soul that brought light into his often dark and tumultuous world.

“Are you trying to spoil him?” Aemond finally spoke, stepping closer, his voice a mixture of amusement and affection.

Y/n turned to him, her eyes widening in surprise before a grin broke across her face. “He deserves it! Look at him, he’s so sweet!”

Aemond chuckled, a genuine smile spreading across his lips as he joined her at the stall. “You might be creating a monster, you know.”

She laughed, her cheeks flushing slightly as she continued to pet Vhagar. “Maybe, but I can’t help it. He’s so charming.”

As Aemond watched her, he realized that the unease from the party had melted away, replaced by the warmth of the connection they were building. In that moment, he felt as though he had found a little slice of happiness amidst the chaos of his life.“Not many people would call him charming,” Aemond remarked, his tone teasing yet reflective.

“Most people are afraid of him,” he continued, watching her interact with Vhagar, the stallion leaning into her touch.

“Afraid? Why? Look at him! He’s adorable!” Y/n responded, her eyes sparkling with delight as she offered another sugar cube. “Sure, he looks scary and big, but he has a heart too.”

Aemond felt a jolt at her words, as if she were unknowingly drawing a parallel between the stallion and himself. There was a tenderness in her voice that struck him, a reminder that sometimes appearances could be deceiving. The way she saw Vhagar mirrored how he wished to be seen—a creature capable of love beneath a fierce exterior.

“Maybe you’re right,” Aemond said, a soft smile playing on his lips. “He might be scary to some, but he’s fiercely loyal.”

“Just like you, I bet,” Y/n replied, her gaze meeting his with a warmth that made his heart race.

For a moment, they simply stood there, lost in each other’s eyes, the bond between them deepening in the quiet of the stables. In that instant, Aemond felt a flicker of hope that perhaps he could let her see beyond the surface, just as she had done with Vhagar.“Do you want to ride him?” Aemond asked, his excitement evident.

Before she could respond, a voice called out from the gathering. “There you are! Come on, they’re asking you to play Rachmaninoff. No one plays it like you do!”

Y/n looked up, surprise crossing her features. “I—I have to go,” she stammered, a hint of disappointment in her voice. She turned to Aemond, her gaze lingering for a moment longer than necessary. “It was nice meeting you,” she said, offering a polite bow before excusing herself.

Aemond felt a pang in his chest as she walked away, oblivious to the truth that lay between them. He watched her go, wishing he could hold onto the moment a little longer, to reveal who he truly was. But for now, he remained in the shadows, hoping for another chance to share with her what he felt.Aemond approached Vhagar, the massive black stallion, feeling a mix of amusement and frustration. “So you like her now, don’t you?” he said, crossing his arms as he leaned against the stable door. “You like her more than you like me, don’t you?”

Vhagar responded with a low, rumbling neigh, nodding his massive head as if in agreement. The stallion's large, intelligent eyes seemed to sparkle with understanding, as if he were sharing a secret.

Aemond chuckled, shaking his head in disbelief. “Traitor,” he muttered, feigning indignation. “I’ve spent years training you, and now you’ve decided to abandon me for a woman who hasn’t even realized I’m her soulmate?”

Vhagar snorted, nudging Aemond playfully with his muzzle, clearly unbothered by his master’s mock outrage. Aemond couldn't help but smile at the stallion’s antics. “I suppose she does have a certain charm,” he admitted, running a hand over Vhagar’s sleek coat. “She’s beautiful and talented, and she even makes you behave.”

As he spoke, Aemond’s mind drifted back to Y/n. Her laughter as she fed Vhagar sugar cubes had been music to his ears, and the way her face lit up in delight had made his heart race. “What am I supposed to do, Vhagar? I can’t just tell her who I am. She doesn’t know about the world I’m part of—the danger that comes with it. What if she runs away?”

The stallion stood quietly, listening, his warm breath billowing softly in the cool air. Aemond felt a strange comfort in confiding his thoughts to Vhagar, the only being who truly understood him. “You know I’ve never been good at this,” he continued, his voice softer. “I’ve built walls around myself for so long, convinced that I didn’t need anyone. But with her… it’s different. It feels real.”

Vhagar shifted, stepping closer, as if sensing Aemond's turmoil. “What do you think I should do? Should I bring her here more often? Maybe she’ll see how gentle you really are. If she knows you, maybe she’ll understand me too.”

Vhagar whinnied softly, nuzzling Aemond’s shoulder in a show of support. “I know, I know,” Aemond sighed. “You’ve already claimed her heart. Just don’t forget who feeds you.”

The stallion responded with a playful nip, making Aemond laugh. “See, even you’re turning against me,” he said, shaking his head. “At this rate, I’ll be left with nothing but a heart full of longing and a jealous stallion.”

He took a deep breath, the weight of his feelings hanging heavy in the air. “But I can’t give up on her. She deserves to know the truth, even if it scares me. I’ll figure this out, Vhagar. I have to.”

Vhagar neighed again, almost in agreement, and Aemond felt a spark of determination ignite within him. “Alright then,” he said, straightening up. “Let’s make sure she knows just how special she is, even if it means battling my own fears.”As Y/n stepped into the elegant gathering, she felt a flutter of excitement mixed with nerves. Clad in her finest gown—a midnight blue that accentuated her figure and complemented her long black hair, which she had carefully styled into a graceful bun—she was ready to captivate the audience with her music.

After a few hours of mingling and playing various pieces, she finally settled in front of the grand piano to perform Elgar’s Salut d'amour, Op. 12. Each note flowed effortlessly from her fingers, the melody weaving through the air like a delicate thread. The music enveloped her, transporting her into a world of beauty and emotion. As she played, she lost herself in the moment, the audience around her fading into the background.

When she finished, a wave of applause washed over her, and she smiled, feeling a warmth spread through her chest. Taking a deep breath, she decided it was time for a short break. She stood and stretched, feeling the tension leave her body, and made her way toward the stables nearby.

As she approached the stables, a sweet sense of serenity enveloped her. The sound of horses softly whinnying greeted her, and she stepped inside, her heart racing with anticipation. What she saw took her breath away.

Before her stood the most magnificent horse she had ever seen. A massive black stallion with a glossy coat that shimmered under the soft stable lights. His presence was commanding, yet there was a gentleness in his eyes that captivated her instantly. Y/n couldn’t help but feel drawn to the beast. He was beautiful and powerful, a true testament to the majesty of nature.

She cautiously approached, her heart pounding with excitement. The stallion seemed to sense her presence, lowering his head and letting out a soft whinny as if welcoming her. “Hello there,” she whispered, extending a hand toward him. “Aren’t you a beauty?”

As she fed him a few sugar cubes she had taken from a nearby bag, she giggled at how he nibbled gently from her palm. His large eyes sparkled with curiosity, and she couldn’t help but laugh. “You’re a little greedy, aren’t you?”

The stallion nuzzled her, making her heart swell. In that moment, all her worries about the gathering and the expectations placed upon her melted away. It was just her and this magnificent creature, sharing a quiet connection that felt incredibly special.

“Do you like it here?” she asked him, leaning in closer, her fingers brushing against his mane. “I can see why. It’s peaceful.”

She spent a few moments enjoying the calming atmosphere, feeling the gentle thrum of life around her Y/n didn’t notice the time passing or footsteps approaching. Then she heard a voice " “Are you trying to spoil him?” "Y/n felt a mix of anticipation and nervousness. The air between them crackled with unspoken words, and she couldn’t shake the feeling that this moment was somehow significant.Y/n had only ever heard whispers and stories about Aemond Targaryen—the dangerous and ruthless heir of the Targaryen family. In the dim light of the stable, however, those tales paled in comparison to the reality standing before her.

As he stepped closer, she took in every detail of his appearance. Aemond was striking, almost ethereal. His long, silvery-blonde hair fell in soft waves around his shoulders, glimmering like moonlight. Each strand seemed to have a life of its own, moving slightly as he shifted. His chiseled features, with high cheekbones and a strong jawline, spoke of power and nobility. His single sapphire eye, sharp and piercing, held a depth that captivated her, while the eye patch only added an air of mystery and intrigue.

He wore a perfectly tailored suit that hugged his form in all the right places—dark and elegant, it contrasted sharply with his pale skin, giving him an aura of both danger and sophistication. Each button gleamed as if polished to perfection, and there wasn’t a single wrinkle or blemish to mar his ensemble. He moved with a grace that was both commanding and fluid, a testament to his confidence.

Y/n couldn’t help but notice the way he carried himself. There was an undeniable charisma that radiated from him, a magnetic pull that drew her in, making her heart race. She could see why people feared him; there was an intensity in his gaze that could easily unsettle the unprepared. But in that moment, all she felt was a mix of admiration and intrigue.

Her mind raced as she compared the stories she had heard—of a cold-hearted mobster who ruled with an iron fist. Yet, as he stood before her, she could see the layers beneath the surface. There was a vulnerability hidden in the depths of his gaze, a flicker of something softer that made her heart ache with curiosity.

He was truly carved by the gods themselves, she thought, marveling at the perfection of his form. His presence filled the stable, a blend of danger and beauty that was both overwhelming and intoxicating. For a moment, she forgot all about the gathering, the pressures of expectation, and the uncertainty that loomed over her. All that mattered was the man standing before her, a figure of strength and allure that captivated her in ways she never thought possible.

As their eyes met, she felt the weight of the world fall away, leaving only the two of them in this serene moment. Y/n realized that the stories surrounding Aemond Targaryen were merely a glimpse into a far more complex being, one who was both terrifying and beautifully human.

He held the conversation with him as much as she could and finally was thankful when she was invited back to the party.  With one last look at Vhagar, she turned and walked away, her mind buzzing with thoughts of Aemond. She couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something deeper beneath his intimidating exterior, a connection she had never felt before. As she walked back to the gathering, she couldn’t help but glance over her shoulder, catching sight of him watching her leave, and her heart fluttered once more.

Throughout the party, Aemond's gaze remained fixed on Y/n, his heart racing as she lost herself in the music. Each piece she played was a testament to her talent, and the elegant melodies flowed effortlessly from her fingers. The notes filled the air, weaving a spell over the gathered guests, transforming the usual drudgery of the fundraiser into something enchanting.

Aemond leaned against a wall, a glass of whiskey in hand, completely captivated. He found himself smiling at her joy as she played one beautiful classical piece after another. Each note resonated with a part of him he didn’t know existed—one that craved beauty, warmth, and connection. He could see how she poured her heart into every performance, and it made the atmosphere come alive in a way he had never experienced before.

“Who knew a fundraiser could be this captivating?” he murmured to himself, a small smirk forming on his lips. Usually, he would’ve been bored, mentally plotting his escape after a few obligatory conversations. But tonight was different. Tonight, Y/n was at the center of it all, and her passion was infectious.

As she played Rachmaninoff, her fingers danced over the keys with such grace that he felt as if he were witnessing magic. The way her expression changed with each crescendo and decrescendo, the way she swayed slightly with the rhythm, it was mesmerizing. Aemond felt an overwhelming urge to protect that joy, to cherish it, and to be a part of her world.

“Look at her,” he thought, a sense of warmth spreading through him. “She’s incredible.”

Time slipped away as he lost himself in her music. It made the usual mingling and forced small talk with guests fade into the background. He was finally grateful for the fundraiser, for the opportunity to see her shine. He could hardly remember the last time he felt this way, the last time he had been able to forget the weight of his family’s legacy and his own reputation.

Just then, the music came to a soft, gentle end, and the room erupted into applause. Aemond’s heart raced as he joined the others, clapping for her with genuine admiration. He could see the flush of pride on her cheeks, and it ignited something inside him. He wanted to be the one to tell her how amazing she was, to support her dreams and ambitions.

As the applause died down and Y/n took a modest bow, Aemond knew he couldn’t let the night end without speaking to her again. The connection they shared—though still undefined—felt like something he wanted to explore, something that could shatter the barriers of his lonely existence. And so, he steeled himself, determined to make his way through the crowd and find her once more.

Aemond stood at the edge of the gathering, the soft glow of chandeliers casting a warm light over the guests. He was still lost in thoughts of Y/n when Helaena approached him, a teasing smile dancing on her lips.

“You never stay till the end of any party, brother,” she said, arching an eyebrow playfully. “I wonder what made you stay till the end for this one.”

Her tone was light, but Aemond could sense the knowing glint in her eyes. He felt the heat creep up his neck, his heart racing at the thought of what she might be implying.

“Uh, Vhagar kept me company whenever I got bored,” he replied, forcing a nonchalant shrug. It was a flimsy excuse, and he knew it, but it was the best he could come up with on short notice.

“Of course, Vhagar,” she replied with a knowing smirk, the corner of her mouth quirking up. “Always the loyal steed, right?”

Aemond couldn't help but roll his eye at her playful banter. Helaena had always been good at reading him, and he wasn’t about to let her see how much he was actually affected by Y/n's presence.

“Just keeping an eye on the horse, Helaena,” he insisted, trying to sound dismissive.

“Right, because that’s what you do at a fundraiser. Keep an eye on the horse,” she teased, her voice laced with amusement. “Just remember, brother, if you’re going to stay, you might want to take a few more risks. Maybe even talk to a few people?”

With that, she gave him a playful nudge before walking away, leaving Aemond to contemplate her words. He felt a mixture of irritation and gratitude for her lightheartedness. As much as he wanted to deny it, he knew he needed to talk to Y/n again—and soon.As the fundraiser began to wind down, Aemond found himself trapped in a series of small talk conversations that felt painfully tedious. Each polite laugh and forced smile wore him down, his mind racing with thoughts of Y/n.

His gaze drifted toward her across the room. She was standing by the grand entrance, slipping on her coat, her movements graceful and deliberate. Even from a distance, he could see how lovely she looked, her midnight blue gown shimmering softly under the low lights.

His heart raced as he fought against the impulse to approach her. This was his moment; he had finally found her, the woman who had captured his thoughts so completely. But the reality of the situation weighed heavily on him.

What if this isn’t the right time? he thought, anxiety creeping in. There are too many people here. What if someone sees? What if someone tries to hurt her? The mere thought sent a shiver down his spine. Y/n was his only chance at love, and the last thing he wanted was to make her vulnerable in front of a crowd that could easily turn hostile.

He clenched his fists, wrestling with his instincts. But I can’t let her leave without at least saying something! He felt a wave of desperation rising within him.

“Excuse me,” he muttered to the person he was speaking with, his attention now fully fixed on Y/n. He took a step toward her but hesitated, knowing that the gathering was still buzzing with laughter and chatter. If only I could protect her, to make her see I’m not like the others.

The conflict within him raged on as he watched her finish fastening her coat. He couldn’t let this moment slip away. He took a deep breath, steeling himself for whatever might come next. I’ll have to be careful, he thought, but I need her to know who I am. I can’t let fear dictate my actions anymore.

With renewed determination, he made his way toward her, each step heavy with purpose and longing.Aemond felt a surge of frustration as Aegon grabbed his arm, pulling him away from his thoughts of Y/n.

“Brother, let me introduce you to Katie,” Aegon said, his tone far too cheerful for Aemond’s liking.

Aemond’s irritation deepened. Has he decided that he won’t let me meet my soulmate ever? he thought, anger simmering just beneath the surface.

“Delighted,” he replied coolly, his voice dripping with formality as he turned to face Katie. She stood there in a dress that left little to the imagination, her hair perfectly styled, but to Aemond, she was nothing compared to Y/n. He couldn’t help but feel a wave of disgust wash over him. She doesn’t even hold a candle to Y/n, he thought bitterly.

“How can I help you, Miss Katie?” Aemond asked, his tone distant and uninviting.

“Maybe you two can find love together,” Aegon chimed in with a mischievous wink, clearly enjoying the situation.

Aemond’s patience wore thin. “Find love? Please,” he scoffed. “I have no interest in pursuing something so… trivial.”

Katie leaned in closer, her fingers brushing against Aemond’s tie, a calculated move to seduce him. “Oh, come on, Aemond. You’re quite the catch. Why not have a little fun?”

He stepped back, his expression hardening. “Do not touch me,” he snapped, his cold gaze fixed on her. “You’re clearly not worth my time.”

Katie’s smile faltered, but Aegon only laughed, clearly entertained. “You’re just playing hard to get,” he teased.

“I’m not interested in games,” Aemond said, cutting through the banter. “Especially not with someone who doesn’t know the meaning of modesty.” He turned on his heel, leaving them both behind as he stormed away, his mind consumed with thoughts of Y/n.

The last thing he needed was to be distracted by the likes of Katie. All he wanted was to be with the woman who truly mattered.As Aemond stepped outside the grand estate, the night air hit him like a cold splash of water, but it was nothing compared to the jolt he felt when he spotted Y/n. She was climbing into a car, her silhouette framed by the soft glow of the headlights. The sight struck him like a punch to the gut.

Not again, he thought, his heart sinking. It felt like watching sand slip through his fingers, a fleeting moment he could never grasp. His soulmate, his only chance at love, was leaving him again.

He knew that small things had never come easy for him—his family, his reputation, his very existence had always been marked by struggle. Why would something as precious as Y/n be any different? But this time, he was determined. No one could take her away from him. Not the gods, not fate itself.

A smirk tugged at the corners of his lips as he stood tall on the driveway, watching the car pull away. He felt a new sense of resolve washing over him, a fierce protectiveness igniting within.

“I will find you, Y/n,” he murmured to himself, his voice steady and low. “You’re mine now.”

With that thought, Aemond turned on his heel, the shadows of the night swirling around him, a silent promise etched in his heart. The challenge ahead no longer felt daunting; it felt exhilarating. He was ready to face whatever came his way, ready to fight for the love he had never dared to believe he could possess.As Aemond made his way back through the estate, he found Helaena waiting for him, leaning against a marble pillar with a knowing smile on her lips. Her arms were crossed, and her eyes sparkled with playful mischief as she watched him approach.

“Well, well,” she began, her voice teasing. “It looks like someone enjoyed the music tonight. And here I thought you hated these events.”

Aemond tried to play it cool, but his discomfort was evident. “The music was... fine,” he replied, his tone deliberately neutral.

“Just fine?” Helaena raised an eyebrow, clearly not buying it. “I saw the way you were looking at her, Aemond. You were practically mesmerized. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so focused on anything that wasn’t a battle strategy or your horse.”

Aemond frowned, trying to deflect. “I was merely appreciating the artistry. Y/n’s an exceptionally talented pianist.”

“Is that what we’re calling it now?” Helaena teased, stepping closer, her smile widening. “I’m not blind, brother. You were completely captivated by her, and don’t think I didn’t notice how you followed her with your eyes the entire evening.”

“She’s... interesting,” Aemond admitted, though his voice was guarded. “But it’s not what you think.”

“Oh, really?” Helaena tilted her head, feigning innocence. “So you weren’t just now at the stables, watching her feed sugar cubes to Vhagar? I’m sure it was purely coincidental that you ended up there at the same time.”

Aemond’s lips pressed into a thin line as he realized how transparent he’d been. “I didn’t plan it.”

“Sure, you didn’t,” Helaena said, her tone dripping with sarcasm. “Come on, Aemond, you can be honest with me. It’s obvious there’s something more here. You looked like you were about to challenge anyone who got too close to her.”

Aemond sighed, knowing there was no use trying to fool his sister. “She... she might be someone special,” he admitted reluctantly.

Helaena’s smile softened, her teasing giving way to genuine curiosity. “Is she your soulmate?”

Aemond hesitated for a moment before nodding, his expression conflicted. “Yes, she is. But Helaena, please don’t tell anyone. It’s too soon, and there are... complications.”

Helaena’s eyes widened with delight at the revelation, but she quickly composed herself, nodding in agreement. “Your secret’s safe with me, Aemond. But you know, I might want something in return.”

Aemond raised an eyebrow, knowing his sister was merely teasing him. “What do you want?”

“Maybe your black card to use for a day,” she said with a sly grin, expecting him to hesitate.

To her astonishment, Aemond reached into his pocket and handed her his black card without a second thought.

“Wow,” she exclaimed, her eyes wide with surprise. “She doesn’t even know you, and you’re already so whipped...”

Aemond rolled his eyes but couldn’t help the small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “You can have the card, but keep the secret.”

Helaena laughed, tucking the card into her pocket. “Deal. But don’t think I’m letting you off that easily. We’ll talk more about this later.”

As she walked away, Aemond shook his head, amused by his sister’s antics. Despite her teasing, he knew she would keep his secret safe. Still, her words lingered in his mind—he was already willing to give up anything for Y/n, and she didn’t even know who he was yet. With a deep breath, he steeled himself for the challenges ahead, determined to claim his soulmate and keep her safe, no matter the cost.

In the dimly lit room of the Targaryen estate, the atmosphere was one of luxury and routine. Helaena was carefully inspecting the pieces of black market jewelry that had arrived earlier that day, taking hertime to select the finest items before the rest were sold off. Aegon lounged lazily on the couch, his attention more on his phone than on the glittering array of diamonds, sapphires, and emeralds before him.

Aemond, on the other hand, sat in a chair by the window, a file open in his lap. He made a half-hearted attempt to read through it, but his mind was elsewhere, occupied by thoughts of Y/n—the way she looked, the way she played the piano, the way her presence seemed to fill every room she was in.

Helaena, ever the observant sister, noticed Aemond’s distraction. She glanced over at him, her lips curling into a sly smile as an idea formed in her mind. Picking up a small sapphire brooch, she held it up to the light, examining the way the deep blue stone caught the rays of the afternoon sun.

“Say, brother,” Helaena called out, her tone light and teasing as she turned the brooch over in her hand, “What do you think of this one?”

Aemond barely looked up from his file, his response automatic. “It’s fine,” he muttered, clearly not paying attention.

Helaena wasn’t about to let him off that easily. “Fine?” she repeated, feigning surprise. “Just fine? But look at the color, Aemond. It’s a sapphire, like your eye.”

Aemond finally looked up, narrowing his eye at her. He could sense the teasing lilt in her voice, but before he could respond, Helaena continued.

“You know,” she said, her tone now more thoughtful, “Brooches are often worn by musicians. They like to keep things simple, elegant... understated. You can see a lot of them with something just like this on their lapel or their dress.”

Aemond’s fingers tightened around the file in his lap, but he said nothing. Helaena, however, was relentless.

“It’s such a subtle piece,” she went on, holding it up against her dress and turning to show Alicent, who nodded approvingly. “Perfect for someone who enjoys music—someone who plays it so beautifully. Don’t you think?”

Aegon, half-listening to the conversation, glanced up from his phone and snorted. “Who cares about a brooch, Helaena? If Aemond really wants to impress someone, he should just go all out and buy them a damn tiara or something.”

Helaena shot Aegon a withering look before turning her attention back to Aemond, her eyes twinkling with mischief. “But that’s the thing, isn’t it? Sometimes, it’s the little things that matter most. The thoughtful gestures. Like choosing a brooch that perfectly matches someone’s style, their personality... their talents.”

Aemond’s jaw clenched as he finally met Helaena’s gaze, the corners of his mouth pulling into a tight line. “What exactly are you getting at, Helaena?”

She shrugged innocently, though her eyes gleamed with amusement. “Oh, nothing at all, dear brother. I’m just saying that some people—especially musicians—appreciate simplicity. It shows that you notice the little things about them. That you care.”

Aemond’s thoughts immediately turned to Y/n, and he couldn’t help but wonder if she would indeed like something like the brooch Helaena was holding. Something understated, but meaningful. A gesture that showed he had been paying attention to the details that made her who she was.

Helaena watched as the gears turned in Aemond’s mind, satisfied that she had successfully planted the idea. She placed the brooch down on the table, casually picking up another piece of jewelry—a delicate diamond necklace this time—and continued with her inspection, pretending to lose interest in the conversation. But not before adding one last, carefully placed comment.

“Of course,” she said, turning the necklace over in her hand, “If you’re not sure what someone likes, you could always ask them... or, better yet, pay close attention to what they wear. Musicians, for instance, have a certain style. But then again, I’m sure you already know that, don’t you, Aemond?”

Aemond’s gaze lingered on the brooch as he processed Helaena’s words. He knew she was teasing him, but there was also truth in what she said. Y/n did have a style—a grace that was reflected in everything she did. And perhaps, just perhaps, a thoughtful gesture like the one Helaena was hinting at would be a step in the right direction.

His lips curled into a faint smirk as he returned his attention to the file in his lap, but not before throwing a quick, appreciative glance at his sister. Helaena had always been able to see right through him, and while her teasing could be relentless, she often had a way of guiding him in the right direction—whether he liked it or not.

“Thanks, Helaena,” he said, his tone begrudging but genuine.

“Anytime, brother,” she replied with a wink. “Just don’t forget to get me something nice the next time a consignment comes in.”

Aegon looked up from his phone, raising an eyebrow at the ongoing conversation between Helaena and Aemond. He had been half-listening, but now his curiosity was piqued. "What is with you and musicians all of a sudden, Helaena?" he asked, his tone laced with mild irritation. "So musicians wear brooches. Big deal. Who cares?"

Helaena didn’t look up from the necklace she was inspecting. "It's not just about the brooch, Aegon," she said patiently, though her eyes twinkled with amusement. "It's about the thought behind it. Musicians appreciate subtle, elegant things that reflect their craft."

Aegon rolled his eyes, still not seeing the point. "Okay, but why are we talking about musicians? Who even cares about that? It's just jewelry."

Helaena finally looked up, giving him a sly smile. "Oh, I don't know, Aegon. Maybe someone around here has taken an interest in musicians lately. Or perhaps... in one musician in particular."

Aegon blinked, completely missing the insinuation. "A musician? What are you talking about? Who's a musician?"

Helaena sighed dramatically, shaking her head as if disappointed in Aegon’s lack of perception. "Really, Aegon? You can’t piece it together? It's not that hard."

Aegon frowned, his confusion deepening. "Okay, so who is it? Who’s the musician? Is it someone we know?"

Helaena exchanged a quick glance with Aemond, who remained stoic and silent, his face betraying nothing. "Let's just say," Helaena continued, "that someone we know might be more interested in a musician than they’re letting on."

Aegon squinted, trying to connect the dots. "Someone we know... interested in a musician..." He glanced between Aemond and Helaena, searching their faces for clues. "Wait, is it someone from the party last night? Is it... no, that doesn't make sense... Who could it be?"

Helaena let out a light laugh, clearly enjoying her brother’s struggle to figure things out. "Oh, Aegon, sometimes I wonder if you’re deliberately obtuse or if it just comes naturally."

Aegon huffed, feeling frustrated and slightly embarrassed. "You’re just messing with me, aren’t you? There’s no musician, is there?"

Helaena smiled sweetly at him. "Maybe there is, maybe there isn’t. But you’re right about one thing, Aegon."

Aegon perked up, hoping for a clear answer. "Yeah? What’s that?"

"Brooches really don’t suit you," Helaena said with a teasing grin, her tone playful.

Aegon groaned in exasperation, giving up entirely. "You know what, Helaena? You’re impossible." He stood up, deciding it wasn’t worth trying to decipher whatever cryptic conversation his siblings were having. "I’m out of here. You two can keep your weird secrets."

As Aegon turned to leave, Helaena waved him off, still smiling. "Bye, Aegon! Don’t worry, maybe one day you’ll figure it out."

Aemond watched Aegon go, his expression neutral, though a faint hint of amusement lingered in his eye. Once Aegon was out of earshot, Helaena turned to Aemond, her playful demeanor softening. "He really is clueless sometimes, isn’t he?"

Aemond simply nodded, appreciating how Helaena had managed to keep the conversation veiled just enough to protect his secret. He owed her for that.As Aegon finally disappeared from the room, Helaena turned her attention back to the sapphire brooch she had been holding. The gemstone gleamed under the soft light, its deep blue color mirroring the shade of Aemond's remaining eye. She held it up for Aemond to see, her expression shifting from playful to thoughtful.

"She might like this one," Helaena said softly, her voice carrying a tenderness that only she could manage. "Maybe not right now, but whenever you feel the time is right."

Aemond's gaze fell on the brooch, the sapphire catching his attention. He reached out, taking it from her hand, turning it over gently as if already imagining it in Y/n’s possession. "It’s beautiful," he murmured, his tone more reflective than he intended.

Helaena watched him closely, her eyes full of understanding. "It matches your eye, you know," she pointed out with a small smile. "It’s like a piece of you that you can give to her."

Aemond looked up at his sister, his stoic demeanor softening for a moment. "You really think she’d like it?"

Helaena nodded, her smile widening. "I think she’ll love it. She appreciates things that have meaning behind them, not just the sparkle. This brooch... it’s more than just a pretty accessory. It’s a symbol. Of you. Of how you feel."

Aemond considered her words, the weight of them settling in his chest. He knew Helaena was right. Y/n wasn’t someone who was swayed by material wealth or grand gestures. She valued sincerity, and this brooch, with its deep, meaningful hue, seemed like the perfect way to express something he couldn’t quite put into words yet.

"Thank you," Aemond said quietly, his gratitude evident in his voice.

Helaena gave a soft laugh, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. "You don’t have to thank me, brother. Just… make sure you take care of her. She’s special. I can tell."

Aemond nodded, slipping the brooch into his pocket as if he were already safeguarding something precious. "I will," he promised, his voice firm with conviction.

Helaena reached out and squeezed his hand gently. "I know you will. Whenever you’re ready to give it to her, it’ll be perfect. Just trust yourself."

Aemond met her gaze, the connection between them strong and unspoken. With a final nod, he let the brooch settle in his pocket, knowing that when the time was right, it would find its way to the one who was meant to wear it.Y/n sat at a small café with her friends, the warm afternoon sun casting a gentle glow over their table. They had gathered for their usual weekend catch-up, but today, the conversation had taken an unexpected turn. Her friends were buzzing with curiosity, and she could sense their excitement.

“So, tell us everything!” Sarah leaned forward, her eyes sparkling with anticipation. “How was the Targaryen party? I heard it was beyond lavish.”

Y/n smiled, stirring her tea thoughtfully. “It was… definitely something,” she began, trying to keep her tone casual. But even as she spoke, memories of the night flooded back—the grandeur of the estate, the elegance of the event, and of course, the enigmatic presence of Aemond Targaryen.

“And what about Aemond Targaryen?” Lydia chimed in, her voice low and conspiratorial. “We’ve heard so many rumors about him. Is he as intimidating as they say?”

Y/n paused, carefully choosing her words. “He has a very commanding presence, that’s for sure. But I didn’t really speak to him much,” she lied, not ready to reveal just how much the Targaryen prince had occupied her thoughts since the party.

“Oh, come on, Y/n!” Sarah nudged her playfully. “You must have noticed something about him. Is he as cold as they say? Or is there more to him?”

Y/n chuckled, shaking her head. “He’s… well, let’s just say he’s a bit of a mystery. I didn’t spend enough time around him to really get a sense of what he’s like.”

Her friends exchanged glances, clearly not satisfied with her vague response. “You’re holding out on us,” Lydia teased. “But seriously, was there anything interesting about the party? It must have been incredible.”

Y/n nodded, eager to shift the focus away from Aemond. “The party was beautiful, really. The Targaryen estate is even more impressive in person—massive chandeliers, marble floors, everything you’d imagine and more. And the people there… they were all so elegant, like something out of a movie.”

“But did anything stand out?” Sarah pressed.

Y/n hesitated for a moment, then smiled softly as a memory surfaced. “Well, there was something… or rather, someone. There was this horse in the stables, a magnificent black stallion named Vhagar. He was absolutely stunning—strong, proud, and surprisingly gentle. I got to feed him some sugar cubes.”

Her friends listened with wide eyes, clearly enthralled by the image she painted. “A black stallion named Vhagar? That sounds like something out of a fantasy novel!” Lydia exclaimed.

Y/n nodded, feeling a strange warmth at the memory of the moment. “He was really something. And despite his size, he was so sweet. I couldn’t help but giggle at how he kept nudging me for more sugar cubes.”

Sarah sighed dreamily. “That sounds amazing. But still, Y/n, you have to admit, Aemond Targaryen is the most interesting part of this story.”

Y/n shrugged, trying to keep her voice light. “He’s… well, he’s definitely intriguing. But honestly, the whole party was just so grand and opulent. It was hard not to be overwhelmed by it all.”

Lydia raised an eyebrow, clearly not buying Y/n’s attempt to downplay her interest. “I get the feeling you’re not telling us everything, but I suppose we’ll let it slide—for now.”

Y/n laughed, grateful for the shift in tone. “Maybe I’m just still processing everything. It was a lot to take in, you know?”

Her friends nodded, finally letting the topic drop, but Y/n couldn’t shake the feeling that Aemond Targaryen had left a much bigger impression on her than she was willing to admit.

part 3

Please reblog ❤️❤️❤️

[mandos-mind-trick]

Jaig Eyes

Summary: Soulmates are forbidden among the clones. Yours just happens to be a certain Captain. Thankfully, he's not above breaking the rules sometimes.

Pairing: Captain Rex x medic!reader

Warnings: NSFW, smut, P in V sex, no foreplay, unprotected sex, some description of battles, wounds, slight blood mention, drinking, partying, Soulmate AU

A/N: Rex my baby, my boy, one of my OG faves. It's about time I wrote something for him. I'm a little delirious from the heat, but I'm still alive. This was supposed to be the first one of the series but Tech and Crosshair demanded more attention.

MASTERLIST

The explosions are loud, even with the tanks as far ahead as they are. Your adrenaline is pumping, but you keep breathing, keeping it under control. That’s why you were chosen for this position, after all. Your ability to keep control even under the most overwhelming, stressful situations. 

Your home planet got hit hard early in the war. Due to its location near four major hyperspace lanes, both sides of the war needed to control it, and that came at the expense of its inhabitants. Many people lost their lives in the brutal battle, both civilians and clones. There wasn’t much left of your home afterwards, most inhabitants of the city displaced. 

So you decided to leave and join the GAR as a medic. You already had the experience, and after doing everything you could to help during the invasion, you had decided to put your life plans on hold and join the army. 

Your ability to keep calm under extreme duress had impressed your instructors during your training, and so they had given you the title of combat medic, and sent you off with the 501st Legion. You had practically been thrown right into the field, not that you had expected much less. 

Kix, the clone medic you served under, had given you a brief tour and rundown on the way to provide reinforcements to the 104th. He had warned you that the area they were landing in was going to be hot, and to expect to jump in right away. 

You had expected nothing less, having already seen just how ugly the front lines can be. 

That’s where you are now, treating troopers practically as they fall. 

“The Captain’s down!” 

The words ring loud and clear through your comm, the energy of the entire battalion shifting. You have yet to meet any of the clone commanders, much less the Captain of the 501st. You had been thrown into this rather rapidly. There would be a time for introductions later. 

Your name is called through the comms, Kix appearing with another trooper, dragging who you assumed was the Captain between them. They lay him on the ground, the other trooper running back into the heat of the battle. 

“We need to stabilize him before we can move him.” Kix says, kneeling next to the Captain. 

You kneel on his other side, taking a look at him. His entire right shoulder piece is missing, an ugly wound oozing blood. It’s a nasty shot, but he’s lucky it’s not on the left. 

“Bacta.” Kix says and you hand off an injector from your belt. 

You move to take off his helmet, your breath catching in your throat. Your eyes are drawn to his helmet, above his visor. The marking on it. You knew most of the clones used some sort of marking to distinguish themselves. Whether it be on their armor, or tattoos, or hairstyles, they all had unique aspects about them to give them individuality. 

This one, though. This one is startling to you. 

Most species in the galaxy experience the phenomenon of soulmates. There are a number that don’t, but they are vastly outnumbered by those that do. 

How one is linked to their soulmate can vary. Yours just happens to be the identifying mark. A symbol or even a phrase that means something to your other half. Or, for the lucky few, an entire name. Most got them at birth, or some shortly after. Rarely were there huge gaps in age between soulmates. Given the vast dichotomy of species in the galaxy, fate wasn’t that unkind. 

Well, most liked to think it wasn’t. 

Your mark showed up eleven years ago. You had already been well into your childhood when you woke up one morning to find a symbol on your chest. You’d never seen anything like it before. After some extensive research, you came to learn they’re called  jaig eyes, a symbol used by Mandalorians for distinguished warriors. A symbol of bravery, tattooed over your heart in blue.

You had thought your soulmate might be Mandalorian, and so you had spent years planning and working towards a trip to Mandalore. 

Then the war started, and your planet was invaded.

The entire situation had left such an impact on you, you decided to push your dreams of Mandalore, and your soulmate, aside for the time being. If fate had paired you together, you would meet eventually. 

You hadn’t expected this though. 

Your hands are shaking just a bit as you grab his helmet, pulling it off. You support his neck, easing his head to lie in the dirt. His face is pinched as Kix ties a tourniquet around his shoulder. 

“I’m fine.” He grunts out, nose scrunching in pain. 

“The gaping hole in your shoulder says otherwise.” Kix says, injecting the shot of bacta into the wound. 

You grimace a bit, knowing how much that hurts. Your own fingers pull down his blacks, exposing enough of his neck to administer a stim shot. You can see as it begins to kick in, numbing the pain and giving him a boost of energy. His face begins to soften, body relaxing a bit. 

Kix calls for an evac, two troopers easing the Captain onto a stretcher before removing him from the heat of the battle. You clear your head, moving on to the next injured trooper. The battle isn’t over. You have a lot more work to do before you can think about this new development. 

****

You wipe your brow, body starting to drag as the adrenaline crashes. The battle had ended, but your job was only getting started. There was still a field of injured troopers that needed care, as well as a full med bay. 

“I’m impressed.” Kix says, finishing applying the bacta patch on the final trooper that needed care. “Not many nat-borns can keep going that long after being in the field.” 

You shrug. “It’s not my first time on the battlefield. My home planet was one of the first invaded by the Separatists. Most of it was wiped out by the battles. I learned very quickly to stay busy. If you’re not doing anything, you remember you’re human and you crack.” 

Kix puts a hand on your shoulder. “Go get some rest. We’ll be fine here.” 

“Thank you, sir.” You nod, heading off to the bunks. 

You hop in the refresher, wishing it was real water, but the sonic shower will do. You don’t let it hit you until you crawl into your bunk, letting the day wash over you finally. You’re shaking, silent tears rolling down your cheeks. You’d mastered the quiet cry a long time ago, not wanting to disturb your fellow medics getting some much needed rest.

You’re exhausted, but you’ve seen far too much today to let yourself rest just yet. 

You need to work through it. If you bottle it up, you’ll only explode later. 

You close your eyes, the image of the jaig eyes coming to the front of your brain. There was no mistaking it. It wasn’t the confusion of battle, or the stress making you see things. The Captain of the 501st has jaig eyes on his helmet, in the same shade of blue as the ones printed on your chest, right over your heart. 

This is going to complicate things. 

It was one of the first things you were taught in your training. Under no circumstances were clones allowed to initiate their soulmate links. If, by chance, one of them happened to be your soulmate, the link had to be rejected. If a clone was found to have iniated the link, they would be decommisioned immediately. 

It’s cruel, but you can understand why. 

The soulmate link is a powerful motivator. The clones were designed to be loyal, focused, and dedicated to fighting and winning the war. Many of the first generation of clones had deserted upon learning of their soulmate marks. It seemed even the most potent conditioning couldn’t overcome the yearning of ones soul to find its other half. 

Even the most loyal clone would turn their back upon meeting the soulmate. 

The thought of being rejected is terrifying. It’s a painful process for both involved. Some who have experienced it claim it feels like your body is being turned inside out, every cell on fire as your soul destroys the link. You remember every second of it, the horrible pain and the grief that settles in as you realize you’ll never be able to feel the same again. 

You’ll never be the same again. 

You can’t tell the Captain. He can never know. You can’t stand the thought of being rejected. Though the pain would ease with time, you’ll never forget it. You’d rather suffer through the pain of being so close but never initiating than feel the rejection of someone who may never have wanted to reject you. 

****

Time flies quickly now that you’ve established yourself amongst the 501st. The Legion is constantly on the move, burning through battle after battle with little rest in between. According to Kix this is very common, with the Legion going sometimes weeks without a break. You know it can’t be good for them, recognizing the exhaustion on many of the trooper’s faces and in their body language. 

You’re beginning to feel it too, tension knotting in your shoulders and the quality of your sleep has been declining. You know it’s not just the stress of constant adrenaline and work, though. Constantly being within close proximity of your soulmate and doing absolutely nothing about it has been wearing on you as well. You’ve spoken maybe ten words to each other when Kix had introduced you to the Captain after the first battle when you’d helped care for him. 

Since then, you’d only seen him in passing. 

It’s slowly driving you insane. 

You’ve grown close to some of the troopers, especially those that frequented the med bay for “unjustified reasons” as Kix liked to call it. It was his code for “they did something stupid and now we have to fix them.” 

You can’t really blame them for being a bit reckless sometimes. They deserved to have some fun every once in a while. 

“There’s my favorite medic!” A heavy arm slings around your shoulder, nearly making your knees buckle. You’d been in one of the storage areas, cataloging everything the med bay needed to stock up on once you landed on Coruscant. “Excited about shore leave?” Fives asks. 

“Actually I am.” You say, honestly. You had planned to book a hotel room and sleep off the stress. You hope the distance from your soulmate will help ease the tension that’s been building. 

“A bunch of us are gonna hit 79s. You should come with us.” Echo says, popping up on the other side of you. You had been wondering where he was, as the two were rarely far from each other. 

It’s a tempting offer. Losing yourself in a bar for a night might help ease the stress. Unless Captain Rex planned on being there too. 

“I don’t know...” You say, chewing your lip. “I was planning on just relaxing.” 

“Come on,” Fives squeezes you against his side. “It’s your first shore leave. Let us show you how we celebrate.” 

You almost say no, but perhaps spending time around others will help you feel better. Even if Captain Rex is there, alcohol can help you forget. Perhaps you could even find someone else, someone to help you forget. 

“Fine.” You sigh, but a smile tugs at your lips. “I’ll come with you.” 

They both cheer, giving you breath-stealing pats on the back. Sometimes they forget they have to be gentler with non-clones. 

“Meet you on the landing platform at 19:00 hours.” Five says. 

You salute him jokingly, making your way to the med bay with a smile on your face. 

***

You’re glad you thought to pack a dress for occasions like this. You’re also glad you packed a dress that covers your chest. The last thing you need is any of them seeing it. Would they report you? Would they tell the Captain? You’d like to think they wouldn’t. It’s not like you’d even been trying to talk to the Captain. 

You check yourself in the mirror, making sure your mark is covered before you make your way out of the venator. As promised, a small group of guys is waiting on the landing pad, some of them having dressed down while others are still in their armor. 

Fives whistles lowly as you approach, your cheeks warming a bit. “Looking good, civvy.” 

“I mean, I know you’re a looker but kriff, you clean up well.” Jesse says, nonchalantly giving you a once over. 

Your face feels hot with their attention and compliments, not used to being on the receiving end. “Thanks, guys.” 

“Come on,” Fives tosses an arm across your shoulders. “Let’s get going!” 

***

You feel warm, slightly buzzed as you make your way back towards the bunks. It’s late...or early depending on how you look at it. You’d had a good time with the guys. You’d danced and drank and laughed a lot. It was a good distraction, and it helped you decompress a bit. You’re exhausted, though, still ready to sleep the rest of shore leave away before you inevitably get thrown into another battle. 

It’s the alcohol that’s dulled your senses a bit, not even noticing the person rapidly approaching behind you until they’ve spun you around, pressing you back into the wall. 

“Fives!” You blink in shock up at Fives, his brow furrowed as he stares down at you. “W-What are you doing?” 

Your heart is racing as his hand lifts towards your dress, all the worst possible things flashing through your head. He’s a flirt, but you’d never thought he’d go this far. Your buzzed brain has just got it in you to call out for help when his hand tugs the neck of your dress to the side, revealing the mark on your chest. 

“I knew it.” He says, letting your dress fall back into place. 

“How did you-” 

“I glimpsed it while we were dancing.” He says simply. “I had to be sure.” 

You step away from the wall, adjusting your dress. “Well you could have just asked instead of giving me a heart attack.” 

“Sorry.” He says, actually managing to look guilty. “Why haven’t you said anything?” 

“I don’t want to get rejected.” You say. “I’d rather live with the pain of him being close than live with the pain of rejection.” 

Fives snorts. “He won’t reject you.” 

You blink up at him. “What?” 

A grin tugs at Fives’ lips. “He won’t reject you. Most of us don’t agree with the rule against soulmates, and we don’t plan on following it. Rex may be a Captain, but he’s not going to reject you just because he’s supposed to. If we followed the rules as rigidly as we’re supposed to, most of us would be dead already.” He puts a hand on your shoulder. “Talk to him. You never know when it might be too late.” 

***

Despite Fives’ admission to their willingness to bend the rules, you haven’t approached the Captain. Partly because you’re still afraid, and also partly because you haven’t had time. After the brief shore-leave, the Legion had been thrown into a long campaign that had been taking its toll. Many, many troopers were injured, and you barely got time to sleep, let alone do anything else. 

Like approaching the Captain about your soulmate mark.  

After two long weeks of grueling battles, it’s finally over. Well, at least the fighting. You still have an overflowing med bay to get through. 

Hours later, most of the troopers have been stabilized and on their way to healing. Kix sends you away, practically ordering you to bed. You don’t argue, your feet already dragging as you leave the med bay. You need a long cry and a nap, ready to crash. 

You hadn’t meant it literally, but it seemed fate was getting tired of your avoidance. 

You walk straight into a hard chest, nearly falling backwards. Hands steady you, and you look up right into the eyes of Captain Rex. 

“S-Sorry Captain.” You stutter, taking a step back. “I-I wasn’t paying attention.” 

“It’s alright.” He says, still holding your gaze. “I know you’ve been overwhelmed in the med bay recently. You’re all working hard.” 

You nod. “Yeah.” You continue to stare at him, the words bubbling out of you before you can stop them. “I need to speak with you. Alone.” 

He blinks in surprise. “Oh. Is there...something wrong? Is it one of the troopers?” 

You shake your head. “No, no. It’s...” You almost backtrack. You almost change your mind, but those soft brown eyes draw you in. “It’s personal.” 

He hesitantly leads you into one of the many storage rooms, making sure it’s empty. You hope no one walks in. You’re already nervous about bringing this up to the Captain. You’d rather not have to try and explain this to someone else. 

You turn to face him as the door slides shut, looking up into his eyes again. His face is drawn and focused, and you almost feel bad for throwing this on him. 

“I think you’re my soulmate.” You blurt out, wanting to get it all out in the open. 

His eyes widen in surprise. “What?” 

You bite your lip, stripping off your gear enough that you can lower the neckline of your shirt a bit. You draw it down, revealing the mark on your skin. “It appeared almost eleven years ago.” 

He steps closer, staring hard at the mark. His hand lifts, his gloved fingers tracing over the lines of the jaig eyes. “The medic’s symbol.” He says, eyes still staring at the mark on your chest. “My mark, it’s the medic’s symbol.” 

You let out a long breath. Fate really does plan out everything perfectly. 

His hand leaves your chest, lifting to cup your chin. You step closer to him, your chests almost touching. How desperately you want to kiss him, to initiate the bond. You’re not even sure that’s what he wants. 

“I think I’ve known since Kix introduced us.” He says, his hand still holding your chin.

“I knew the moment I saw you on the battlefield, when you got shot.” You say. 

“Why didn’t you say anything sooner?” He asks. 

“I didn’t want to get rejected.” You admit. “I-I thought...but then Fives said-” 

“Fives knows?” He asks. 

You nod. “He saw the mark when we went out to 79s last shore leave.” 

His grip tightens just a bit on your chin, jealousy flashing in his eyes. 

“Nothing happened.” You quickly add, realizing your words left a little too much unsaid. “We just danced, and he confronted me after about it. He said you clones aren’t quite as uptight when it comes to rules as everyone thinks.” 

The side of his mouth lifts in a smirk. “Not in this Legion at least. I do wish you’d said something sooner, but I understand if you didn’t know...I’m not going to reject you.” He holds you still for a moment before dropping his hand. “The General is being called back to Coruscant, so we’ll get a short leave once we return. Two hours after we land, come to the barracks. I’ll make sure they’re empty.” 

Your stomach squirms with excitement. Even if you do nothing but sit and talk, the prospect of being close to your soulmate has your body coming alive. You nod, hardly able to contain yourself. 

You don’t feel quite so tired anymore as you make your way to your own barracks. 

***

The two hours after landing seems to take a lifetime. Your eyes flash to the chronometer constantly. The first half hour hadn’t been so dreadful, as you had spent most of that helping move still recovering troopers, and loading up carts to pick up supplies. 

Then you’d found yourself with nothing to do but wait, so you had returned to your barracks to wait out the hour and a half before you’d make your way to the clone barracks. You’d considered dressing up, but you thought that might draw too much attention. Wearing light gear could at least give you an excuse for being there, should anyone ask. 

You head out ten minutes before, knowing it will take you that long to get across the ship. The trooper’s bunked on the opposite side of the ship from the medics, who were close to the med bay. 

Your stomach flutters with nerves and excitement the entire way. You’d thought about this moment for a long time, though it’s not quite playing out like you had expected. You’re not complaining, though. You’re lucky to have someone as loyal and caring as the Captain for your soulmate. 

You make it to the barracks, Captain Rex waiting outside the door. He’s removed his armor, wearing only the blacks underneath. You greet him with a smile, and he returns it. You like it, you realize, seeing him smile. 

He leads you inside, this set of barracks smaller than the others. It’s specially set up, he tells you, for the more higher ranking clones. The Captain, the ARC troopers, and those on his specialized squad. 

He leads you to the bed closest to the fresher, rubbing the back of his neck. “I didn’t really plan anything. I don’t want you to feel pressured into doing something you don’t want.” 

You put a hand on his arm. “I figured we’d just let things happen naturally. Even if all we do is sit and talk, that’s fine with me.” 

He smiles down at you. “Then let’s talk.” 

And so you do. 

You tell him everything. From your earliest memories to getting your mark, to the devastation of your planet during the start of the war. You tell him about how you’d planned to visit Mandalore in hopes of finding your soulmate, and how you’d given up that dream to join the GAR. 

He tells you everything about himself too. Growing up too fast on Kamino, the endless training, being called to the front when the war started, how he was there on your home planet when it was attacked, all the men he’s lost, the stress of the war. They’d been designed to be more resilient to high stress situations, but the grief of loss and the exhaustion still weighs on him. 

You wrap your arms around him before you even think about it. You feel for him, you really do. As much as they’re supposed to be just numbers in an army fighting a war they didn’t even volunteer to be a part of, you know they’re more than that.

“That’s why most of us don’t follow the rule about soulmates.” He says, his arms wrapped around you. “We have to believe there’s something beyond war and loss.” 

“I’m glad you don’t agree with it.” You say, resting your head on his shoulder. “I don’t think I could have given you up.” 

His hand slides up your back, moving to rest between your shoulder blades. “I...don’t have a clue what I’m doing.” 

“I don’t think anyone does.” You say, and you mean it. “I think most of it is just supposed to...be natural. It’s supposed to feel right.” 

He pulls away from you, looking down at you. Your faces are inches apart, breath mingling. This close you can see the lines on his face, the light scattering of freckles on his nose and cheeks. 

“You’re kinda beautiful.” You say, staring at him. 

“I think I’m the one that’s supposed to say that.” He says, leaning in closer. “You’re the most exquisite thing I’ve ever seen.” 

Your cheeks heat up, a goofy smile tugging at your lips. “Stop. I am not.” 

He cups your face, his gloved thumb tracing your cheek. “Of course you are. You were made for me, after all.” 

Your lips meet, a spark shooting through you. You feel warm and light, pure energy racing through your nerves. His grip tightens on you, pulling you closer against him. He's warm and solid, like a cabin during an ice storm. 

He groans quietly against your lips, pulling you into his lap. You settle against him, tilting your head as the kiss deepens. You hadn't really planned on going this far, but you now understand why people say once you meet your soulmate, it's uncontrollable. 

He pulls away, pressing his forehead to yours. "I don't want to feel like I'm rushing you."

You smile. "I want this too. I don't think I could stop."

He wraps his arms around your waist, flipping you easily onto your back. "Good. I don't think I can either." 

He presses his lips back against yours, slotting his body against you. He's all lean muscle, fitting perfectly against you. He presses even closer, something hard poking against your thigh. 

You smile into the kiss, shifting your hips slightly to create some friction. You're already damp, your body well prepared for this moment. It had been building up for weeks. You can tell now, how much you'd been yearning for him, even if you hadn't noticed before. 

His lips trail down your jaw, charting a path down your throat. You arch into him, fingers digging into his broad shoulders. You tug at his blacks, one of his hands reaching back to pull the top off over his head. 

You run your fingers down his chest, feeling over every bump and scar. 

“I’ll tell you about them later.” He says, tucking his face back into your neck. You have a few too he’ll want to know about. “Right now, I want to see you.” 

You smirk up at him. “Then you best get to work, Captain.” 

He matches your smirk, sitting up on his heels. “That’s brave, issuing orders to your commanding officer.” 

“Well, in certain situations, I outrank you.” You reply. 

He unbuckles your med kit, setting it on the floor. “Don’t tell me Kix has been putting ideas in your head.” His hands slip under your shirt, trailing along your skin. “I’ll make a pass, though. This is one situation where I don't mind being told what to do.” 

You gape up at him for a moment. “Do you...like being told what to do, Captain?” 

He pulls your shirt over your head, tossing it onto the floor. Your breastband quickly follows, heat blossoming across your neck and chest as he stares at you. You feel a bit self-conscious under the intensity of his gaze. “Only if it’s you.” He says. “You’re so beautiful.” 

You smile shyly, reaching out for him. “Not quite as beautiful as you.” 

“Definitely more beautiful than me.” He says, leaning into your touch. 

“I’ve been waiting so long for you.” You say, caressing his face. 

“Then I won’t make you wait any longer.” He presses a kiss to your lips before sitting back up, undoing his belt. He slips his pants off, tugging yours off as well. 

You should feel self conscious being bare in front of him, especially only knowing him for a short time, but it feels natural. You know it’s natural. You were meant to be together. 

He slots his body against yours once more, his hard length pressing up against your core. You’re already wet in anticipation, more than ready to seal your bond completely. It’s a bit strange after having thought you might get rejected if you ever revealed it to him, but you’re glad he’s at least willing to break the rules about this. 

His hips grind against yours, dragging his length against your folds. You moan, spreading your legs further for him. You want him as close as possible. You need to have him as close as possible. 

“You’re so wet for me.” He groans, dragging his hips against yours. 

“I need you.” You whimper, arms wrapping around him. “Kriff, please Rex.” 

“Yes ma’am.” He says, kissing your throat before he reaches down, lining himself up. 

Hearing him say it stirs something in you, heat rushing straight between your legs. You slot that away for later, focusing instead on him as he slowly presses into you. The stretch burns a bit, but he goes slow, moving inch by inch until he’s seated inside you. You shiver at the close contact, your body coming alive from how connected you are. 

“Kriff, you’re so tight.” He groans, dropping to his elbows over you. “Fit me so perfectly.” 

“Well, I was made for you.” You say, wrapping your arms back around him. 

“So perfect for me.” He says, pressing a kiss to your lips. 

He begins moving, small thrusts as he drags his hips against yours. You cling to him, wanting him as close as you can get him. The sensations and the thought of having him so close set every nerve ending alight in your body, energy thrumming through you. You know it's the connection, the link you share coming alive. 

You love the feeling of it. 

It’s a bit sloppy and awkward, as neither of you are experts. You don’t care though, the pleasure still building as picks up speed. He’s close too, you can tell by the desperation of his movements. You slip a hand down between you, circling your clit as you near the edge. 

He stills as he cums, your own orgasm washing over you at the same time. You cling to him, holding him as close as possible as you ride out your highs together. 

“How much time do you think we have?” You say, holding him on top of you. 

“More than enough.” He says, letting himself sink closer to you. “I told Fives to keep them out as long as possible. 

***

You hadn’t meant to fall asleep. You had been so comfortable and comforted by Rex’s presence, you had just drifted off without trying. 

It’s the arrival of the other troopers that has drawn you from your slumber. Rex’s arm tightens around your waist, obviously having heard their return as well. So much for keeping this a secret. 

You hope maybe they’ll all stumble to bed tiredly and not even look in your direction. You’re hidden from the door by Rex’s body, his arm pulling the sheet up higher inconspicuously. 

“I see the Captain’s been busy while we were away.” A smug voice says. 

“Ha! I called it! You owe me 20 credits!” Another voice calls out. 

“Fives,” Rex growls, going to turn around, but you sit up, clutching the sheet to your chest. You’re still very much naked. 

“Wait, did you bet on us?” You ask in disbelief. 

“You owe me another 20!” Hardcase exclaims, slapping Jesse’s shoulder.

Rex wraps an arm around you, pulling you back down. “Let them have their fun. I’ll make them all do extra rounds in the training room tomorrow.” 

There’s a simultaneous groan from all of them as they shuffle to their bunks to get ready. 

“Don’t worry, cyar’ika. Your secret is safe with us.” Hardcase says. 

“Just as long as I don’t feel the bunk shaking.” Jesse says, climbing up to the top bunk. 

“No promises.” Rex smirks, wrapping his arms back around you.  

Taglist:

@stressed-cherry

[freetobeafcknriot]

Okay but hello! I saw your post about a Soulmate!AU for TUA and with season 4 coming I feel like I need to know more sooooo may I?

anon the way you made me screech and giggle and cry tears of joy because of course you may know more?? i've been waiting for this??? for reference, this is the post and this is how i'm tagging the au to keep track of it on my blog. because i may not have a title, but i'm an editor and sometimes a writer and almost always i just have an overreacting imagination. so i definitely needed a tag. anyway! i'll... idk i will give you a few details? hcs? this is the gist of it, buckle up !

the psa for this is that there are two kind of soulmarks: the ones you already have when you are born (if you're born with it; not everyone is and as a matter of fact the only two brellies to have a twin flame are allison and klaus) and the ones that appear through life (way more common). a case could be made to differentiate between these two categories, for which we either talk about twin flames—allegedly what once was one single soul now split in two perfect halves who are said to recognize and yearn for one another—or soulmates—two souls drawn to one another out of compatibility or remembrance who connect and form something.

this may vary from one culture to another, but there generally is no fixed standard regarding romantic or platonic bonds, as every soulmark and soul bond are unique in form and shape and meaning. this is the core of it all.

now. . . when they're little, reginald makes six of his seven children get the umbrella academy tattoo. in this universe, that tattoo is sort of a faux mark, because reginald had a strict and precise stance on soulmarks and at the time claimed that such things were foolish compared to the duty the academy had towards the world. the team should have formed a united front, be a unit, so that tattoo was a symbol that was to be seen as binding. marks and bonds can be made not just by fate, after all! at the time, little viktor was exempt from it because he wasn't part of the academy.

(little did they know that years down the line, in the sixties, an actual mark would appear on that same spot. this time though there would be seven of them.)

anyway, i don't know if you want a rundown of the soulmarks and whatnot? i have an in-depth list of bonds (both marked and not) with backstories and considerations and hcs regarding canon events that is quite lengthy because i imagine the au splitting in two branches at some point—one canon compliant up to season 4 when it's out and one canon divergent post-season 1 or 2—and  i'm also writing down a list of the soul bonds within the academy that is basically an abstract from viktor's book (because he would have included it too). i'll keep it short for starters because otherwise i'll end up unloading too much on you all and i'm afraid of being too all over the place, but basically. THE SOUL BONDS:

there's the tattoo of the series/faux mark and the actual soulmark that in my mind appears on top of it mid-season 2 and is shared by the brellies. team zero, hey? then from the oldest to the most recent to manifest we've got. . .

FIVE & VIKTOR, the rings ┈ because i nicknamed them all according to their soulmarks they have this small pigmented ring on the right ring finger that changes in shade depending on the physical distance between them. very subtle and cool and with much lore following canon, as you may guess. the only thing i'm gonna say for now is that five and vik's soul bond goes back to when they were four and it played a small role in the leaving lights on and sanwiches out situation.

LUTHER & ALLISON, the cryptolect ┈ it means that they can speak a language of their own. literally! it's impossible for anybody but them to understand it, reginald probably tried and failed to identify patterns or elements from various linguistic branches to make some sense of it but it just can't be picked up or taught as it's basically second nature. given how luther and allison were as kids it was such a big deal and so obvious that no one even remembers a time before and obviously due to recent events it's kinda cool to me to see it as a bit deteriorated but still ever-present bond.

FIVE & BEN, the wisps ┈ literally what five started calling the two flame-like little spirits that represent his and ben's soul bond after ben pointed out that they looked like the will-'o-the-wisp he'd read about in a book. but also because of the way they would appear and always lead the way to one another. that was their thing. nobody but five and ben has ever been able to see the wisps, not even klaus, so they had a theory that maybe they were an echoed apparition of their souls or something like that. there's a lot of lore/hcs here, too, especially regarding five's disappearance and time in the apocalypse and ben's afterlife as a ghost. all i can say is ‘so close yet far’ and ‘never truly gone’.

KLAUS & BEN, the timers ┈ it is as it says, only there were speculations about what the timers led to given that they weren't aligned (read: they were counting down to different dates) and not even made out of conventional numerals. the soulmark itself was a bit above the inner crook of the left elbow, no darker than a sunspot, regularly in motion and indicating years, months, days, hours, minutes, and seconds in roman numerals, which is part of the reason why it was a bit difficult to interpret with no previous familiarity. even more so if you're oblivious or in denial. again, lore and angst and delayed realization came with a row of light null characters in its stead. quite a bit of baggage because i love them and canon says so.

DIEGO & KLAUS, the compass ┈ more specifically, i have it jotted down as a moving indicator that appeared more or less when they were around thirteen or fourteen. it might have seemed out of the blue then, but all things considered it wasn't that unexpected, especially when you look at season one or if you too think that diego used to haul klaus from the streets or drag him to rehab if they ran into one another. anyway, their soulmark is kind of a compass if you go by its shape. it's embedded on the lower part of the palm of their right hand, towards the thumb (below klaus' hello tattoo), and it does move and spin, but instead of pointing north it points you towards the general direction of the other.

OG!BEN & VIKTOR, the blossoms ┈ the most subtle and late soul bond of them all. i like to think that the lowest numbers were close as kids, given the information we were given, so even though their relationship might have stilled a little in their teens it was still tender enough to grant viktor and ben a soul bond. they were never sure of when it happened because the only instance where the soulmark in on itself becomes visible is when they touch. physical contact equals a tiny luminescent outlined flower appearing near the knuckle of their left middle finger. to which i feel the need to remind you all of this:

so these are the soul bonds within the hargreeves siblings! without taking into account sparrow!ben (or the sparrows in general) because stars do i have something in store for pookie as well.

i was tempted to add more, but i also wanted to emphasize how there doesn't always need to be an actual, visible soulmark for a bond to be important plus i'm waiting to see if season 4 makes me add more lol. diego is a primary example of this because, without spoiling anything, he secretly craved that kind of bond as a child, even though his siblings love him just the same regardless. it's also the reason why i have a list of non-marked bonds as well as one for soul bonds featuring characters outside of the academy. there might also be a playlist somewhere, because each bond has a song in my mind, but i digress!

this has gotten super long already so for now, that's it that's all. but i'm tagging this au and working on it and my inbox is there if you uuh, wanna chat about it more? ngl it was hard not being able to rant about it with anybody, because there are some elements and facts and implications there that genuinely alter my brain chemistry daily. so thank you for the ask, nonnie! <3

[luxora]

TXT -> {Soulmate AU} -> Meeting you

Requested: No

Group: TXT

Genre: Fluff.

A/N: So I couldn’t really choose on how someone knows that you are their soulmate, so I kind of have done a variety of different identifying soulmate stuff. Feel free to let me know which one you prefer!

Yeonjun

Yeonjun wasn’t particularly looking for his soulmate because he was still in his youth and was not quite ready to settle down exactly. Or maybe the words ‘settle down’ weren’t exactly the words he should use, because it was not like he didn’t want to meet his soulmate, because he did, its just he was not actively looking for them because it will happen when the world decided to let it happen, hence why he was not bothered in trying to actively search for them.

The two of you will meet someday, and hopefully he will be someone you were willing to accept as your soulmate.

Yeonjun glanced down at his wrist, cocking his head at the sight of a small crown tattoo in the middle of it. It was a worldwide known thing that soulmates have matching tattoos, therefore Yeonjun will know who his soulmate was once he catches a glance at it, on whoever they may be. A shout from across the cafe interrupted his train of thought, making his sigh as he reverted his attention to his job at hand.

Since his parents wanted him to experience real working experience, he had opted to work part-time at his uncle’s coffee shop as a barista. It was fairly easy to do and Yeonjun has always met a variety of people, some pleasant and some not. He will admit he makes good money, and he was content being surrounded by the smell of coffee and cake while customers came in for a break, meeting, or something else.

Yeonjun hummed to himself as he reorganized the cups and straws behind the counter, the aroma of freshly ground coffee beans floating in the air as Yeonjun made all the freshly brewed caffeinated drinks. It was a typical day in his life, crafting perfect cups of coffee for the myriad of customers who passed through, school ending two hours ago and he still had a few more to work before he could head home to do his homework. Although if he really had to choose his preference, he would much rather doing extra hours of work than homework. His mathematics homework was a nightmare from the undead, and he wanted to avoid doing it as long as possible.

Amidst the steady hum of conversation and the soft jazz playing in the background, the bell of the coffee shop ringed and Yeonjun glanced up to see someone walking towards the counter, totally engrossed in a phone call. He didn’t seem to recognize them, not being a regular, but he fixed a friendly smile as they quickly ordered their coffee, not sparing him much of a glance as they glanced at the menu, told him their order, before returning back to their conversation.

Not offended to the lack of a friendly converse, Yeonjun,  began to prepare the drink with practiced precision, only glancing at the stranger at odd times when he heard an exclamation from their end, no doubt reacting to something dramatic which had happened. As he was finishing up with the drink, he noticed the stranger tugging off their hoody and tying it around the waist, holding their between their ear and shoulder as they tied a loose knot before grabbing their phone again.

Since they were busy with their conversation, Yeonjun placed the steaming cup on the counter, ready to call out the order, but just before he could, the stranger  finally ended her call and turned to collect their coffee, this time with a smile on their face as they reached out for it. But it was just as they were reaching for the drink did Yeonjun's eyes widened in surprise when he caught the mark on their tattoo.

On the stranger’s wrist was a small crown tattoo, an exact match to the one that adorned his own wrist. It was the soulmate mark—the unique symbol that bound two people together across time and space. And while he didn’t think he would meet you so randomly, just knowing that you were in front of him, oblivious to his own matching tattoo, it just swept the floor out from under him. And you did not seem to realise the effect you suddenly had on him as you curled your fingers around the coffee.

“Thank you so mu-”

Just as you were to pull your hand back with the drink, Yeonjun found himself grabbing your wrist, keeping it place while his heart raced with a mix of excitement and disbelief. You immediately frowned at him, attempting to tug your hand back, making Yeonjun nervously clear his throat before he finally displayed his bare arm to you, most notably to his own crown tattoo on his wrist.

Yeonjun carefully watched your expression, it starting off with confusion as you turned to look at him arm, before shifting to surprise, shock, and then recognition, your own eyes glancing at your own one, Yeonjun’s fingers covering most of it and yet still visible to the two of you. And then you finally looked at him.

Both of you finally took the time to analyze each other’s appearances. While he was dressed in his school uniform while donning a barista apron, you were dressed casually, and as he looked at you, he figured you were about a year or two older than him, but not by much. Your lips parted slightly as you gazed at him before slowly moving into a shy smile.

“...Hi.” You eventually said,

“Hi.”

Yeonjun mustered a small smile, a silent acknowledgment of the extraordinary connection that the two of you now shared. Both of you were donning shy smiles, content in the small bubble of miraculous energy which formed between the two of you, only to be simultaneously snapped out of it by an irate customer behind you. While you blushed at the interruption, Yeonjun couldn’t help but glare at the customer behind you, feeling a sense of protectiveness wash over him. He felt you tug your wrist out of his hand, igniting a small spark of disappointment, only to be quickly replaced with joy as you grabbed your coffee and then pointed at one of the booths with a smile.

“I’m going to sit over there for a while.”

to wait for you

The unsaid message was clear to Yeonjun, and he just smiled before nodding.

“Sure thing.”

Soobin

Life truly was grey.

Soobin couldn’t help but stare out the bus’s window helplessly, looking at the passing sights and yet could not truly appreciate them due to his lack of color. Being unable to see color was an aspect which everyone had to deal with until they met the soulmate, Soobin having not met his yet due to the fact he had no idea who they were.

His parents only managed to see color for the first time when they met in their late twenties, coincidentally meeting in a coffee shop where his mother accidentally spilled her coffee all over his dad. But fortunately enough his father’s anger did not last long because the second he locked eyes with his mother, a literally flurry of color hit him at once. Soobin thought his parent’s meeting was cute, although it did little to motivate him to actively search for his soulmate because they could literally be anywhere in the world.

Soobin sighed as the bus moved to a stop, patting down his school bag as it remained on his lap. It had always been a very tedious day to deal with and having such thoughts about the lack of his color in his life hardly helped his mood. As the bus started moving again, Soobin couldn’t help but lift his head to watch the other people walking through the bus to find a seat, only to suddenly lock eyes with someone who happened to send a jolt through him as he was was shocked with electricity.

All of the sudden, the world around Soobin burst into a kaleidoscope of colors he had never seen before. The once-muted surroundings now danced with vibrant hues, leaving him in awe. It was a revelation that stirred his soul, a profound connection he couldn't comprehend. And it seemed that you felt a similar sensation as you completely froze on the spot, clutching at one of the bus rails to stay upright as you continued to gaze at Soobin, neither of you looking away.

Soobin was for a loss of words. The previously dull grays that he as grown accustomed to throughout his life had suddenly disappeared and was now replaced with so many colors which he could not add a name to yet. The bus itself was bright, and the passing outside sights were just so enigmatic, the air in the bus becoming somewhat charged with an unspoken energy as the bus rumbled along its route.

Neither of you looked away from another, seemingly realising what had just happened between the two of you. Soobin couldn’t help but gulp at the sight of you. You were just...so pretty. You were dressed in casual clothes with a bag, looking as if you were going shopping, but to Soobin, he couldn’t help but admire how stunning you looked. So with a pounding heart, he glanced at the seat next to him and looked at you carefully, non verbally offering for you to sit beside him, which you understood after a few moments. After you took a seat beside him, Soobin took a deep, steadying breath before turning to you.

"Just now...do you see the colors too?"

You gazed at him, saying nothing for a few moments before nodding. Looking at him with an expression mixed with surprise and realization, you finally parted your lips to speak. 

"Yes, and... it's incredible. I've never seen anything like this before."

“Me neither.”

Neither of you said anything afterwards, simply gazing at one another in curiosity, becoming familiar with each other’s facial features and appearance while the bus continued on its journey. When the bus came to another stop, Soobin took another steadying breath before clearing his throat and offering you his hand, flashing a small smile.

“I’m Soobin.” He introduced himself, waiting patiently as you reached out to grab his hand, your fingers curling around his in a firm handshake which sent a jolt of electricity though his body as you shook his hand. You smiled shyly at him.

“Y/N.”

Beomgyu

Beomgyu twirled the pen in his hand patiently, waiting for the response to his quip to come back as he was quite interested in what he would received. When he finally saw the scribbling of words on his forearm, he couldn’t stop his smile of excitement as he watched the sentence fill his forearm, making him laugh once he saw the full response.

‘You barbarian, mint chocolate is the best ice-cream in the world. It tastes nothing like toothpaste you mainstream maniac.’

He loved chatting you, even though he has never actually met you yet, but that was not much of a problem as he felt like he knew you well enough. Beomgyu never understood how it really works, but once someone reached the age of thirteen, they somehow were able to communicate with their soulmates through their bodies. Or rather, through writing on their bodies.

He did not believe it at first, nor did he really understand it, but he is naturally a very curious creature and so he could not help but test the theory, taking a permanent marker and writing the word ‘hi’ on his arm, watching with puzzled amazement that it faded away after one minute after he wrote it. But minutes passed by since his first word disappeared with no response, so Beomgyu tried writing it again, watching it fade away but again be met with no answer.

He was kind of put out after that, thinking that maybe his soulmate bond was broken. He had told his parents what happened but they reassured that he was not broken, it was probably because his soulmate has not come of age yet. Put out by the news, Beomgyu experimented drawing on his arm, watching how the drawings would disappear, internally expecting a response but eventually accepting that he was not going to get one.

Although four months later after his birthday, Beomgyu was surprised when he was making himself a sandwich and saw a word on the back of his hand as he was buttering his bread.

‘Hello?’

And the two of you have been conversing ever since.

Beomgyu was now in his final year of high school, along with you, albeit neither of you attended the same school. While Beomgyu would love to go meet you in person, he knows that you don’t live in the city; therefore it was unrealistic of a meeting occurring between the two of you. But he knows once he graduates, he is going to head first thing to you, to finally meet you in person and to have some of those real life dates and adventures he has promised you ever since the two of you started conversing.

It is kinda cliche to think that he has fallen in love with you despite not knowing you. But then again, the two of you were soulmates and were to end up with one another one way or another, and so he can’t really be blamed falling for you, especially since your personality was so clear to him in the messages between the two of you.

Beomgyu twirled his pen as he waited for your next response, the monotonous hum of the classroom filling the air as Beomgyu struggled to concentrate on the lecture. You weren’t answering and usually you were super quick, making him frown as he tried to figure out what was keeping you back from answering his previous question. Just as he was about to write a question on his forearm, his attention was taken away by the teacher announcing the arrival of a new student, which was rather strange since it was the last year of high school for all of them, so he has no idea why someone would move to a new school so late.

Beomgyu lowered his pen to the desk and straightened in his seat, prepared to meet the new student. But as the door creaked open, a figure stepped inside and Beomgyu's heart skipped a beat when he saw you walking in, donned in the school’s uniform, a smile on your face as you scanned the classroom until you were locking eyes with him.

Obviously the two of you knew what each other looked like due to exchanging social media information, the two of you following one another. He had always thought you were beautiful in your photos, but now seeing you in person...you were breathtaking, photos doing no justice. Beomgyu faintly heard the teaching introdcuing you to the class, which you responded with a friendly smile and a bow, albeit your eyes never left Beomgyu’s, a cheeky glint in your eyes as you cocked your head in his direction.

As if the universe had planned the meeting, the teacher instructed you to take the seat next Beomgyu, it being the only available one in the class. He watched in rapture as you walked towards him, smiling at all the other students before taking a seat, purposely ignoring him as you grabbed your books and pens and settled them on the desk. As the teacher resumed the lecture, Beomgyu couldn't concentrate. His mind buzzed with the realization that you were in fact sitting right next to him.  The unspoken conversations that had filled his days with a quiet magic were now replaced by the prospect of face-to-face interactions, something he had dreamed of and yet... it was possible now.

When the class finally ended, Beomgyu hesitated for a moment before calling your name, where you immediately turned your head to look at him with a cheeky smile.

“Surprise.”

“W-When did you-”

“My father got a job transfer here. We have just moved and coincidentally found out that this school was closest to home.”

“...coincidentally you say?”

You winked at him.

“Coincidentally.”

The two of you shared a smile which was posed as odd to the other students, but to one another, it was all-knowing and filled with bliss as the two of you realized that unspoken conversations via your arms was no longer a necessity.

Taehyun

The vibrant lights of the carnival cast a kaleidoscope of colors over the lively crowd. Taehyun, surrounded by the laughter of his friends and the cheerful hum of the festivities, felt a peculiar energy in the air but he simply thought it was his body reacting to having free time for the first time since forever. School was finally over and he was finally able to enjoy his holiday. With the carnival coming to town, Taehyun and his friends eagerly attended during the evening to celebrate the end of exams while getting lost in the world of fast food, games and rides.

Taehyun was strolling through the crowd with his friends, laughing at the argument occurring between two of them about one of the stall games, when he suddenly froze in place when he caught the gaze of a stunning individual near one of the food stalls. In a fleeting moment, the world seemed to still and the carnival's cacophony faded into the background.

As his eyes locked with the stranger’s, a wave of warmth suddenly surged through him. It wasn't just a mere connection; it was something deeper, something magical. It was as if the whole universe was doing a 360 on its axis, reorganizing everything until the one center of the world was you, your eyes locked deeply with his and neither of you moving from your spots, unable to look away. Taehyun faintly heard his friends concerned calls of his name, having noticing his sudden absence, but he did not listen as foreign thoughts suddenly entered his mind.

Handsome

Stunning

So perfect

The thoughts were not his own, they instead contained a voice which did not belong to him, which made him slowly smile as he realized what had happened. Deciding to test his theory, he began to project his own thoughts, which had a positive effect as you suddenly smiled at him, prompting him to start walking in your direction.

You were dressed so prettily, and Taehyun couldn’t help but compare your smile to the sun with how bright and beautiful it was. You apparently had just purchased a stick of cotton candy, the pink treat barely been tasted due to the sudden occurrence between you and Taehyun. You openly stared at him with a mixture of curiosity and excitement, which he obviously reflected back to you as his heart pace increased as he got closer to you.

"Can you hear me?" Taehyun thought, his eyes widening in amazement.

"Yes, I can. This is... incredible."

Despite the carnival noise buzzing around the two of you, your thoughts were so clear to him and he knew it was the same for you. He was aware that once one was able to hear the thoughts of another, it meant that they had found their soulmate, their souls and minds becoming linked with one another for all eternity, until death parted them. Taehyun was never actively looking for his soulmate due to his young age, and yet now that he has found you, he couldn’t help but feel excitement. He could communicate with you without  uttering a single word, the fact that he had such an n intimate connection with someone was just...amazing.

Taehyun stopped in front of you when he finally reached you, the two of you having matching smiles as you gazed at one another from head to toe, becoming familiar with each other’s appearance before giggling. He smiled at you before reaching for you hand, you having no objecting when he tugged you a little bit closer, the two of you invading each other’s personal spaces, not that either of you minded.

"We're soulmates," Beomgyu whispered, his voice echoing in both their minds. You nodded.

“We are.”

“I will admit, I did not expect to find you here.” You laughed.

“Neither did I.”

Both of you exchanged a smile before Taehyun tugged you by the hand to introduce you to his friends, your fingers immediately lacing with his and confidently following him as the two of you met up with his group who all had surprised expressions on their face. After introductions, all of you then explored the carnival together, riding whimsical carousels and sharing cotton candy under the twinkling lights, albeit the two of you seemed to be in a world of you own while his friends posed as multiple third wheels.

Hueningkai

The day’s events were very exciting due to the celebration of his 18th birthday, but that was not the most exciting thing for him. For Kai, the most exciting part was for him to go to bed that night, because it meant that he would finally be able to enter the dreamscape which will belong to himself and his soulmate.

Of course he couldn’t assume to meet you straight away. For all he knew, you weren’t of age to meet him in your dreams yet, but Kai hoped for the possibility that you were already of age and were waiting for him just like he has been waiting for this day to come. Call him a hopeless romantic, but he was looking forward to meeting the other half of his soul, and after he bid his family goodnight and got into bed, sleep seemed to taunt him endlessly due to his mixed excitement and anticipation.

Of course his parents and older sister advised him not to be too hopeful because you may not be there to share a dream yet, but it didn’t diminish his hopes. Even if he was not to meet you tonight, he would waited endlessly for you in his own little dream world, you were to meet with him sometime, he just hopes it will be sooner rather than later.

He doesn’t know how much time passed as he stared up at the ceiling of his room, but eventually he managed to fall into a slumber, the embrace of sleep gently pulling into a dreamscape, the world shifting and transforming around him and until a sight finally took its form in front of him - a sun-kissed beach. It felt like he was really there in person, the the sound of waves crashing against the shore, warm sand embracing his bare feet, and a gentle breeze that carried the scent of salt and freedom.

Kai glanced down at his own body, realizing that he was no longer in his pajamas but rather in beachwear  - a pair of shorts and a buttoned shirt which was unbuttoned half way. He smiled at himself and at the sight before him, but then he suddenly he was not alone as he felt a gaze on him, prompting him to glance up and felt a hitch in his breath.

A stranger stood in front of him, a beach ball in their hands and a bright smile on their face as recognition flashed across their face. They were similarly dressed in beachwear, and as Kai continued to stare at their features, he couldn’t help but become flustered at their attractiveness. And locking eyes...he just felt a connection just form instantaneously between the two of you.

"Kai?" You called out said, a smile playing on your lips which made his heart pound in excitement and glee.

“Y-Yeah, that's me. Are we... dreaming together?"

Even though he figured that is what was happening, the fact that it was...it was just sending his head in a mess and he couldn’t help but let out an embarrassed laugh, hand rubbing the back of his neck as he continued to gaze at you. You nodded, your eyes sparkling with excitement. 

"Seems like it. I've been waiting for this moment."

“Me too...Y/N.”

He didn’t know how he knew your name, but it just graced the tip of his tongue and escaped, him saying it like some kind of holy prayer which will bring all miracles to the world. He had felt so incredibly connected when he heard you utter his name, and it seemed him saying yours had a similar effect as you eyes fluttered at the sound of it and a slight flush dusted your cheeks. You giggled before walking closer, holding out the beach ball in your hands to him, delight in your eyes.

“Care to play?”

He reached out for his, his hands brushing against yours in an accidental touch, jolting a spark of warmth through his body and yours, prompting you two to blush and giggle at the instant sensation.

“Of course.”

The two of you decided to make the most of dreamlike encounter. With the beach ball in hand, the two of you began a playful game without any rules,  laughter echoing against the backdrop of the dream beach as the two of you volleyed the ball back and forth while sharing stories, dreams, and the intricacies of each other’s lives. With each passing moment, the dream became a canvas for the budding connection between the two of you The sun dipped below the horizon, casting the sky in hues of pink and gold. It was a dream, yet it felt more real than anything Kai had experienced before.

As the dream beach faded away, Kai stood by your side on the shore, hands connected and fingers intertwined. Your skin pressed against his made him feel so warm despite the two of you only being in a dream. He truly felt that he was holding your hand in person, and soon after the dream ended, he looks forward to the oncoming nights where he will be able to meet with your constantly until the two of you finally met in person. The two of you shared a bright smile, your other hand cupping his cheek while joy reflected in your eyes.

“I don’t have to wait anymore.”

“Neither do I.”

A promise was made that night that the two of you were going to meet in person soon, because before Kai could kiss you, he had to take you out on a real date, as you only experienced the best things in life which he can only hope to provide. But it was a new adventure to the two of you, one that both are eagerly anticipating to play out.

[rweoutofthewoods]

hi! i have a question regarding every omen of the valley.

lile if your soulmate not only feels the pain but also gets the same injury like what does thst mean for surgeries?

for example, i tore my acl complete in half, would my (hypothetical) soulmate also have a torn acl?? when i had my surgery the doctor drilled my bones, would my hypothetical soulmate have also gotten that done. i was under anesthesia but would they be?? like the pain??

im sorry if you havent actually put THAT much though into this but🧍🧍 curiousity and all.

OKAY! Hi! I was actually thinking about this so I'm glad you asked. I have put much thought into it, especially since I kind of created my own twist on the soulmate identifiers. There were lots of kinks to work out.

Basically, it's a little complicated. The soulmate get the same scars and marks of their injuries and SOME pain, but it's a different kind of pain. It's more like the memory of pain or a watered-down version.

I do have a scene much, much later where one of them is injured seriously and the other will feel it which will help explain what it's like much better. But like there's like a feeling of connection, and the soulmate who didn't get the injury firsthand will experience ringing ears and blurry vision (if it's a super serious injury.) and a hint of the pain, but more so like your body knows something is wrong, but it also knows you're not experiencing the injury firsthand. So it's more uncomfortable than actual agonizing pain.

So in the first chap, Regulus was cut and James saw it on himself, but he wasn't actually in true pain, and at least not the same amount of pain that Reg would have been in. And if Regulus had been hurt badly enough to kill him, it wouldn't kill James too. Even if like Regulus' throat was slit (THIS IS NOT ACTUALLY HAPPENING. It's just my example) and he died, James would bleed, and he'd have a scar. It'd probably be a horrible experience, and he'd feel Regulus die, but not the same amount of pain that Reg would feel. The wound itself would be superficial, and it would just scar exactly the same.

The other thing is pain is stronger the closer together soulmates are. So like wolfstar found of they were soulmates because Sirius burned his hand in front of Remus and they both flinched. So in the case of surgery, it'd be medical protocol that soulmates have to be as far as possible from the soulmate getting the surgery so they don't feel much pain. (Also, I should note, that when soulmates meet, the bond does intensify. So before they meet, they might not feel much pain at all and only get the marks of the injury.)

I hope this makes sense, it is kind of complicated and I've had to do a lot of twisting and worldbuilding to figure out how all this works, because I've never really seen a soulmate AU that works exactly the same.

[strangerthingsbigbang]

Title: Branded by Destiny

Author: @kayleeofcamelot Artist: @lemonhitsu Beta: Dee Characters: Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson, Robin Buckley, Wayne Munson, "Reefer" Rick (Stranger Things), Dustin Henderson, Lucas Sinclair, Erica Sinclair, Maxine "Max" Mayfield, Nancy Wheeler Relationship(s): Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson, Robin Buckley & Steve Harrington; Background Relationships: Minor Robin Buckley/Vickie, Minor Argyle/Jonathan Byers Warnings: Canon-Typical Violence, Blood and Injury, Blood and Gore, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Worth Issues, Implied/Referenced Suicidal Thoughts, Internalized Homophobia, Panic Attacks, Vomiting, Steve Harrington Has Absent Parents, Eddie Munson Has Bad Parents, Near Death Experiences, Temporary Character Death Rating: Mature Additional Tags: Soulmates, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Romantic Soulmates, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, References to Canon, Vecna is Defeated (Stranger Things), Eddie Munson Lives, Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn, Happy Ending Wordcount: 36,083 Summary:

The first time you touch your soulmate’s skin directly with the palm of your hand, a soulmark will brand itself onto your wrist. Steve and Eddie never had any reason to shake hands and they're certainly not close enough to touch each other casually. So when Eddie pins Steve to the boathouse wall, pushing him back with his open palm he nearly drops the broken bottle then and there at the sensation of his soulmark spark. You gotta be kidding, right? Steve stares down at the bare inside of his arm. He longs for nothing more than to find HIS person. The one who's destined to be with him, destined to love him. Does he even have a soulmate waiting for him? His parents didn't. His love is bullshit anyway. Nancy's harsh words still ring in his ears on a bad day. - A Soulmate AU S4 retelling

Branded by Destiny by kayleeofcamelot

art masterpost by lemonhitsu

[steddie-fanfic-recs]

Need Brooks no Delay, but Late is Better Than Never

by etlagiapet

Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationship: Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson Characters: Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson, Robin Buckley, Dustin Henderson, Mike Wheeler, Eleven | Jane Hopper, Will Byers Additional Tags: fifteen years later, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Eddie Munson Lives, POV Steve Harrington, Misunderstandings, Angst and Feels, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Love Confessions, Idiots in Love, Platonic Soulmates Robin Buckley & Steve Harrington, Smut, The Lord of the Rings References, Angst with a Happy Ending, No beta we die like Barb Words: 20,620 Chapters: 1/1

Summary

The year is 2001. The Fellowship of the Ring is out in theaters, and Steve is being dragged along to the supposed most important day of Dustin's life. The thing is, Eddie Munson's coming, too, and Steve hasn't spoken to him in nearly six years. Not since misaligned feelings and an ill-timed love confession created a rupture Steve didn't know how to repair. “We just drifted apart, man. That’s all.” Dustin sighs dramatically. “Was it because you figured out you liked dudes and freaked out?” Steve winces. It’s a joke. He can tell by Dustin’s tone, knows he likes to poke fun about Steve’s sexuality after he identified as a self-proclaimed ladies' man for so long, but it’s never come up this way before. Steve could deflect, but something in him shifts and instead he says, “More like because I figured it out too late.” “Ooooooh,” Dustin breathes, and Steve can all but imagine the lightbulb flashing to life above his head. It makes Steve think of Dustin’s old hat with THINKING CAP on the front. “Oh my god, that makes so much more sense."

[wizardheart83]

An attempt at a soulmate identifying marks situation for Rings of Power but with more agency for everyone all the time:

It began as an arrow, appearing when a child understood that things existed beyond their sight and could be searched for, and when it occurred to them to ask “where” to aid in the search.

An elf child at sixth months after birth might wonder, “Where is Ada? Where is brother?” And the arrow would appear, dark or bright, on the back of their small hand. It would point the way, showing them where to go until they met the absent loved one. When the question was answered and gone, the arrow would fade too. The same might happen to a dwarf at a year old, or to a child of men past their second year.

Later, when hands grew larger and eyes sharper, when questions grew more complex, the arrows were replaced by the shifting maps of adulthood.

First story is Arondir/Bronwyn

Second is Galadriel/Celeborn

I haven’t started the third so if you have requests I’m open to them but … celeborn defense squad 4 life, so if you ask for ✨a certain ship✨ you are Morgoth trying to alter the music in defiance of Eru and it will not turn out how you think.

[veryace-ficrecs]

Asexual Fic Recs

These fics feature characters who either canonically or non-canonically identify as asexual. If I include a fic on this list that features a character that you personally don't think is ace - thats ok! everyone has their own headcannons for characters, Just be polite!

Merlin (TV)

keep me as i keep you by fabledfrog - Rated G

Merlin smiles, a smile that makes Arthur feel like he’s the one who brings out the sun every morning. It’s a smile that says ‘I am proud of you’ and ‘I know you will’ and spells out devotion and care.

Heart Lines by PeaceHeather - Rated G

Everyone is born with a heart line, a pigmented mark running from the heart down the left arm to the palm, which turns color when the person comes of age, telling them when it is time to seek their soulmate. Red indicates a romantic love, while blue is for platonic "heart-friends", as the minstrels called it. Uther had always told Arthur to ignore his heart line, that it wouldn't matter who his soulmate was; princes did not marry for love, after all. If was lucky, he'd be able to keep her as a mistress, so long as he did not get any children with her. Uther hated magic and would have urged Arthur to ignore the heart line anyway, if he could. Arthur wasn't sure his soulmate was really a woman despite Uther's assumptions. But Arthur's heart line hadn't even come into its full color yet, which meant he hadn't come of age in the eyes of the gods, despite being named crown prince by Uther. So it really didn't matter: whoever his soulmate was, he wasn't yet ready to meet them. Then one day his heart line comes in, and it's neither red nor blue.

Leverage (TV)

Not Quite the Birds and the Bees by YumeArashi - Rated T

One morning over breakfast, Parker asked Hardison, "So am I supposed to offer to have sex with you?" [Relationships get interesting where Parker's involved. Luckily, Hardison is a very understanding guy.]

Better than Normal by YumeArashi - Rated M

Parker's take on life, love, and sex (or lack thereof) with Hardison and Eliot.

Star Wars

The Slow Progression of Wanting by celeste9 - Rated T

Everyone in the Resistance seems to assume that Finn wants either Rey or Poe, with the only question being which one. Though Finn slowly comes to realize that he does want them, he doesn't want them in the way that people seem to think he should. He thinks there must be something wrong with him. (asexual!Finn)

The Princess and the Nerfherder by Fialleril - Rated G

“Are we dating?” Breha said to him one afternoon in the Academy’s library. Or, the life and times of Breha and Bail Organa.

Abstinence Only by mandocule - Rated G

Boba Fett was fine with the world thinking he didn't approve of sex before marriage. It was true, anyway, if only in the sense that he didn't want sex at all, before or after marriage. He just hoped Djarin would get the picture and stop trying to get with him before he had to lay it out - or, worse, before he caught feelings.

it's getting hard to be someone, but it all works out by redsquadronblues (aceofcorvids) - Rated T

Wedge and Luke keep coming back to each other for ten long years, and it's the opposite of a problem. Or, five times Wedge wakes up next to Luke Skywalker, and one time he doesn't.

Lord of The Rings

Three is Company by starryeyedknight - Rated T

“And what about you, Samwise? You’re going to tell me you’ve never looked as Mr Frodo with an eye for a quick fondle if he offered it – a handsome fellow such as him?”

Frodo straightened up, dusting off his jacket and shirt. “Yes, go on Samwise; I want to hear the answer to this.”

“No, I ain’t,” Sam said with laboured patience. “Mr Frodo isn’t interested in that sort of thing, and so I don’t consider it. It just seems…well, too much like taking liberties, if you take my meaning.”

“Do you know, I find that rather insulting? Just because I’m not looking for a good tupping doesn’t mean you couldn’t pine after me a little, Sam Gamgee, even as a matter of courtesy. What’s a hobbit got to do to be objectified around here?”

Sometimes relationships need a little communication to define. In which Rosie is bolder than the boys expect, Frodo is overcome with emotion (and a severe case of the giggles), Sam still doesn't understand what a catch he is - and all three hobbits love each other very dearly indeed.

9-1-1 (TV)

To Become a Family by RaspberryDreams1 - Rated M

Eddie's on leave before being deployed after the death of his 17 year old brother Leonardo, when his old school friend Shannon comes to him asking for help. Shannon is pregnant and Eddie's the only member of the family who knows that Leon had been casually involved with Shannon. Shannon doesn't want an abortion but cannot face the idea of bringing up a baby on her own. Believing that this may be his only chance at fatherhood, Eddie agrees to claim paternity and marry Shannon to provide the child with financial security and a father.

Baldur's Gate (Video Game)

joke me something awful, just like kisses on the necks of best friends by LyriumTainted - Rated G

“…If you wanted to cuddle, you could’ve just said so.” “I have no idea what you’re talking about, I’m doing this for your benefit.”

Supernatural

Warmth by TheIttyBitty - Rated G

Asexual!Cas & Protective!Dean

What Matters by bumblewyn - Rated T

Cas thinks he owes it to Dean to have sex with him, Dean shows Cas what truly matters.

Get it Wrong, Get it Right by feraldanvers - Rated T

Dean’s been mixed up over his feelings for a long time, but it never occurs to him that Cas might be mixed up, too.

[why-raven]

quiz: tragic play character — yiuno.

Misunderstood Villain.

Prepare for an onslaught of both the most dehumanizing and hateful takes, and flood of thirst comments. You’re chronically misunderstood; whether or not you’re actually evil is debatable. You may be acting out for revenge, to defend someone you love, or even just to protect yourself—you’re a pretty jaded person. You don’t trust or even really like most people—perhaps you did, at one point, but that part of you is gone, and you don’t go a single day without grieving it. You think a lot about what your life could have been. You’re stuck in the past—you’re angry and maybe you don’t even want to be, but this is the only way you can see to survive. You’re open, but less in a trusting way and more like a wound. You don’t like to let people see you, but the hurt spills out of you before you can stop it. You’re impulsive, even as you try hard to plan and prepare. Maybe someday your side of the story will finally be heard. Until then, you can convince yourself that being hated is safer anyway.

link to quiz.

Oh, wow. What an eerily accurate result.

Yiuno embodies many aspects of an anti-hero: be it common tropes (ex. Dark and Troubled Past), or tip the scales further into extremity (ex. Psycho for Hire and Femme Fatale), it’s really fun working on his characterization… as much as I struggle to comprehend his complex, multilayered nature.

I dunno if people see him as a misunderstood villain—guaranteed, this guy literally kills for a living, and he was a war criminal at one point (as a major participant during the Magi War in the Fifth Astral Era). His unique physical condition has twisted his perception of time, like he’s stuck in a psychological limbo akin to a living hell, for eternity. While the idea of eternal life has been explored many times in the game (both the MSQ and mostly the ARR side-quests), to an immortal like Yiuno, only death can bring him true peace.

Oh wait, sounds like Emet-Selch much? Not really—for one, Yiuno does not crave for the past (in fact, he wished he could erase it and start over again), and he doesn’t believe in utopia. While Emet tried to justify his genocidal acts as a “necessary ritual” to reclaim his lost paradise, Yiuno doesn’t even bother to sugar coat the war crimes he’d committed. Though Emet (in Shadowbringers, not Endwalker) did humor the idea of giving the current world a chance as he observed how WoL and the Scions tried to save the First, he never stopped to show outright contempt for the Sundered, calling them lesser beings unworthy of existing. Yiuno, however, never harbors any form of racism or social prejudice towards anyone—on one hand, he sees people as, well, just people; on the other hand, he may appear to be rather apathetic and detached (and hence why he could kill people as willingly as Emet, but for different reasons).

It also didn’t help that his childhood was equally fucked up. Born into a clan with an unconventional (and controversial) family system and societal rules, Yiuno grew up pretending to be a girl for many years just so that he could stay together with his twin sister for as long as possible. This twisted upbringing gave him a rather unique outlook to gender and sexuality—while he identify himself as biologically male and is very much aroace, mentally he feels disconnected and sees them as mere labels. It’s hard for me to explain in a way that people can understand, without radical folks jumping the gun and dissing me about “misrepresentation” and stuff, so I won’t go into details here. (If you want to know more, feel free to ask me in DMs!)

I guess the last line rings true—perhaps it’s easier to hate him for no reason at all. I mean, unless it’s his soulmate Y’shtola or the energetic curious child Sora, very few people have the patience and time to learn more about a walking history like Yiuno.

[definesanity]

Hello, I have had a few ideas that I feel you might like.

The idea being, Sauron Reader for SAGAU.

Depending on the au, the reader is either like Sauron was before his fall into darkness, still devoted to order and perfection, but not to the extremes he became infamous for after joining Morgoth, or a full on reborn form of the Dark Lord of Midle Earth that sees Teyvat as a second chance to establish a perfectly ordered world under their command.

Perhaps, in a normal or cult au, they have been given this chance at redemption, at earning their place among their fellows once more following their final defeat when the Ring was destroyed and they were rendered impotent until the final battle for Arda.

In an Imposter/impostor au, or an angst au where they are forgotten or perhaps in a Bloodletting Au, they begin to gradually return to the dark lord they once were, finally becoming the Dark Lord when they see no other option and decide that they have had enough of this mad world.

In one verse they could give their rings of power to their most loyal, not turning them into Nazgul but still binding them to the Reader, and in the Imposter AU they could decide to recreate the Nazgul with a few modifications out of those who remained loyal to them.

Perhaps there could be a moment where Celestia steps in, desperate to stop the downfall of the world they and the Fatui, have joined forces to either purify or defeat their own creator to save themselves and their world.

The Abyss order and Hilichurls could take the place of the Orcs and Goblins or perhaps the reader could find a way to recreate the orcs and other forces of darkness from Middle Earth in Teyvat.

I have also had an idea for an au where Lumine, or Aether depending on the Traveler you choose, is not seen as a hero but instead treated with disdain and suspicion given their other worldly nature.

People off them the bare minimum to outright nothing even after all they do for them, from the Knights sending them on a suicide mission against Dvalin, to the Qixing trying to execute them as a scapegoat after Morax fakes his death, and so on.

These things begin to wear on the Traveler, eventually making them drop their kind and heroic persona and become a cold and unfeeling being once more, the culmination being in Inazuma where they are betrayed and left to die against the Shogun by Miko in the hopes of bringing Ei back...only for them to almost kill both her and Ei, leaving behind a burning Tenshukaku and Inazuma city as the rebel forces they usurped control of tear through the city in a berserk rage due to the mixture of Delusions and magics the traveler has used on them.

Eventually, after the events of Sumeru, they decide to simply abandon the world and let their sibling find a way to meet up with them in another world.

However, something has happened that they did not anticipate, for just as they gather their power and set in motion a ritual that should allow for them to leave, or to send something akin to a distress signal to their fellows, the people of Teyvat begin to search for them.

Perhaps it is due to Kusanali unknowingly broadcasting their memories across Teyvat, perhaps it is due to a piece of information long hidden in Irminsul being released regarding a prophecy of the Twin Stars, or perhaps it is for something else entirely such as the traveler being soulmates with many of the beings in each of the nations, though the marks identifying them as such only appeared after they left the nation behind and cut ties with it, rejecting those who had been set to be their missing pieces.

Regardless, the people of Teyvat arrive just in time to see the Traveler pushing their twins limp body off of their blade as their ritual roars to life and they either vanish into the stars once more, deciding to regain their powers with their kins aid, or the beam pierces through the false skies of Teyvat and sends the equivalent of an S.O.S. to the Travelers people, thus triggering a new conflict for the world.

Well, what do you think?

Till next time, take care.

Who hurt you? Like, seriously, do you wanna get something off your chest? Because you seem like there's something you want to get off of your chest.

Anyways; I have zero knowledge of Lord of The Rings, but I can write, and I say: woah, cool :3

There's not a lot I can say other than that, but thank you for your thoughts, friend-o :D

And thanks, take care of yourself as well.

[theprinceandagcd]

seven(ish) sentence sunday

Thanks for tagging me @heybuddy-drabbles!! I'm working on a soulmate identifying marks AU that I shared some snippets of on Twitter but have been dying for an excuse to share here so

----

“I know you’ll have your soulmark tomorrow, and I –” Henry visibly swallows as he leans closer, and suddenly the air is heavy, and Alex can’t fucking move. “I’ll have to – It doesn’t matter. But I wondered if… if I could kiss you before you, before you’re surely swept off your feet by some wonderful person who deserves you.”

For a moment, Alex is still frozen. Every feeling he’s been trying to keep at bay is mixed up in his stomach with three tequila shots, and the combination feels strangely reminiscent of the first drop on a roller coaster, like feet dangling and hands gripped tight to the handles as he plummets. His brain is running a thousand miles an hour and getting fucking nowhere, and by the end of a long moment, he only knows three things.

Henry wants to kiss him.

Alex wants Henry to kiss him.

Henry is fidgeting with the ring on his pinky and backing away and –

Alex reaches out to wrap his fingers around Henry’s wrist reflexively, and he remembers how to make his mouth work. “Yes,” he breathes. “Kiss me. You can.”

----

EEK ANYWAY it'll probably be posted within the next couple of days and I'm very excited about it AH ANYWAY if you wanna participate literally just tag me in it bc if you're reading this I tagged you sorry them's the rules :)